1
00:00:05,799 --> 00:00:08,969
[Harriet] After everything
went kablooey at the trial...
2
00:00:08,969 --> 00:00:11,137
[sighs] ...I couldn't sleep.
3
00:00:11,137 --> 00:00:12,847
I felt too ashamed.
4
00:00:14,224 --> 00:00:16,268
The raw onion I ate didn't help.
5
00:00:16,268 --> 00:00:20,689
So, before the sun came up,
I decided to go outside
6
00:00:20,689 --> 00:00:24,442
and take my first look
at the fall harvest moon.
7
00:00:24,442 --> 00:00:25,527
[sighs]
8
00:00:26,236 --> 00:00:30,407
Every year, I make a wish
on that wild, orange moon.
9
00:00:31,032 --> 00:00:35,161
None of them ever came true,
except the one I made that night.
10
00:00:35,161 --> 00:00:36,288
[gasps]
11
00:00:38,373 --> 00:00:39,749
My notebook!
12
00:00:41,751 --> 00:00:44,296
I thought it was gone forever.
13
00:00:44,296 --> 00:00:46,006
It obviously wasn't a trap
14
00:00:46,006 --> 00:00:49,634
because a safe didn't fall on me
when I picked it up.
15
00:00:50,635 --> 00:00:52,679
So who had dropped it off?
16
00:00:53,263 --> 00:00:54,431
Maybe it didn't matter.
17
00:00:59,060 --> 00:01:03,732
All I cared about was that it was back
and that there was a ton of writing to do.
18
00:01:09,654 --> 00:01:13,074
The weird thing was
my brain was on the fritz.
19
00:01:13,074 --> 00:01:16,536
So I decided to do what I always did
when I felt stuck.
20
00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:19,456
I went on an emergency spy mission.
21
00:01:29,257 --> 00:01:30,258
[groans]
22
00:01:33,136 --> 00:01:35,388
[meowing]
23
00:01:40,852 --> 00:01:41,853
[groans]
24
00:01:41,853 --> 00:01:44,314
[meowing continues]
25
00:01:48,276 --> 00:01:51,363
♪ The $10,000 tower ♪
26
00:01:51,363 --> 00:01:54,532
♪ It's full of power and money ♪
27
00:01:55,075 --> 00:01:56,451
[groans]
28
00:01:57,869 --> 00:01:59,829
Why can't I think of anything?
29
00:02:00,413 --> 00:02:02,874
It's because I'm too dangerous, Harriet.
30
00:02:02,874 --> 00:02:06,086
Everything you write in me
just hurts other people.
31
00:02:06,086 --> 00:02:08,087
It ain't pretty, kid.
32
00:02:08,671 --> 00:02:12,133
But Ole Golly said I never had to
apologize for telling the truth.
33
00:02:12,634 --> 00:02:16,513
Uh-huh. And how'd that work out for you,
Goldilocks?
34
00:02:17,472 --> 00:02:21,560
[Harriet] That splinter feeling
in my stomach suddenly started jabbing me.
35
00:02:22,143 --> 00:02:24,813
It was like it was telling me
something I already knew
36
00:02:24,813 --> 00:02:27,107
but was too scared to admit.
37
00:02:27,816 --> 00:02:30,360
I can't be a writer.
38
00:02:31,903 --> 00:02:34,573
{\an8}♪ I just wanna be
You just wanna be ♪
39
00:02:34,573 --> 00:02:36,324
♪ We just wanna be ♪
40
00:02:37,450 --> 00:02:39,911
♪ I am gonna be who I wanna be ♪
41
00:02:39,911 --> 00:02:41,580
♪ My autonomy ♪
42
00:02:42,080 --> 00:02:45,125
♪ No, I won't cut my hair ♪
43
00:02:45,125 --> 00:02:47,460
♪ And I'll wear whatever ♪
44
00:02:47,460 --> 00:02:53,466
♪ I like it when I get to be myself ♪
45
00:02:53,466 --> 00:02:56,094
♪ I don't wanna be
You don't wanna be ♪
46
00:02:56,094 --> 00:03:00,265
{\an8}♪ We don't wanna be told what to do ♪
47
00:03:03,476 --> 00:03:06,062
[Harriet]
As I watched people heading off to work,
48
00:03:06,062 --> 00:03:07,689
I began to wonder.
49
00:03:07,689 --> 00:03:10,901
If I wasn't going to be a writer,
what could I be?
50
00:03:12,027 --> 00:03:13,904
[squeegee squeaking]
51
00:03:15,155 --> 00:03:17,115
Harriet the window washer?
52
00:03:19,618 --> 00:03:20,785
[bicycle tires screech]
53
00:03:21,870 --> 00:03:23,538
Harriet the florist?
54
00:03:26,625 --> 00:03:29,836
What about Harriet the hot dog man?
55
00:03:30,754 --> 00:03:31,880
[sighs]
56
00:03:32,714 --> 00:03:34,799
Harriet? What are you doing out here?
57
00:03:35,383 --> 00:03:36,551
Just thinking.
58
00:03:36,551 --> 00:03:39,387
If I wasn't a writer,
what else do you think I could be?
59
00:03:39,387 --> 00:03:42,015
Well, there's lots of great opportunities
out there
60
00:03:42,015 --> 00:03:43,934
for someone as smart as you.
61
00:03:43,934 --> 00:03:45,477
You could be a doctor.
62
00:03:45,477 --> 00:03:47,562
I can't stand the sight of blood.
63
00:03:47,562 --> 00:03:49,022
What about a teacher?
64
00:03:49,022 --> 00:03:51,816
I'm allergic to getting hit by spitballs.
65
00:03:52,525 --> 00:03:54,861
How about an astronaut?
You could go to the moon.
66
00:03:54,861 --> 00:03:58,323
Dad, I get nauseous when we get in the car
to go to Grandma's.
67
00:04:00,492 --> 00:04:01,868
We're just trying to help.
68
00:04:01,868 --> 00:04:04,996
I know. I just wanna be alone, okay?
69
00:04:07,540 --> 00:04:11,628
Harriet, this came in the mail yesterday
while you were out with your mom.
70
00:04:13,421 --> 00:04:14,422
Ole Golly?
71
00:04:17,050 --> 00:04:20,512
[Ole Golly] Harriet, you'll remember
that I told you many times
72
00:04:20,512 --> 00:04:21,596
Keats once said,
73
00:04:21,596 --> 00:04:25,559
"Truth is beauty, and beauty is truth."
74
00:04:25,559 --> 00:04:28,728
And I'm glad you used your notebook
to tell your truth.
75
00:04:28,728 --> 00:04:32,649
Naturally, those notebooks should not
be read by anybody else.
76
00:04:32,649 --> 00:04:38,780
But if they are, then, Harriet,
you're going to have to do one thing.
77
00:04:38,780 --> 00:04:42,909
And you won't like it.
You will have to apologize.
78
00:04:43,493 --> 00:04:44,995
Apologize?
79
00:04:44,995 --> 00:04:49,040
Remember that writing is
to put love in the world,
80
00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:51,126
not to use against your friends.
81
00:04:52,335 --> 00:04:54,629
[Harriet]
It wasn't what I expected to hear,
82
00:04:55,297 --> 00:04:58,174
but I knew exactly
where her words of wisdom would take me.
83
00:05:08,476 --> 00:05:10,729
Janie, I'm sorry.
84
00:05:10,729 --> 00:05:15,317
The mean stuff I wrote in my notebook,
not apologizing last night, everything.
85
00:05:16,693 --> 00:05:19,821
You're not a mad, bad scientist.
I was just jealous.
86
00:05:19,821 --> 00:05:21,156
[chokes] Jealous?
87
00:05:21,156 --> 00:05:24,492
I'm a pretend writer
whose words hurt people.
88
00:05:24,492 --> 00:05:28,872
You're a scientist-scientist who's trying
to make the world a better place.
89
00:05:28,872 --> 00:05:30,790
[chuckles] I don't know about that.
90
00:05:30,790 --> 00:05:33,835
I was trying to synthesize
a new kind of energy source yesterday,
91
00:05:33,835 --> 00:05:36,838
and I accidentally vaporized
my nostril hair.
92
00:05:39,424 --> 00:05:42,177
[both laughing]
93
00:05:45,639 --> 00:05:47,474
I'm so sorry, Janie.
94
00:05:49,017 --> 00:05:50,185
Forgiven.
95
00:05:55,690 --> 00:05:56,691
Buffalo?
96
00:05:57,692 --> 00:05:58,735
Thanks.
97
00:06:02,489 --> 00:06:05,325
Were you the one who dropped off
my notebook last night?
98
00:06:05,325 --> 00:06:10,455
Yep. You without your notebook is
like Albert Einstein without his violin.
99
00:06:10,455 --> 00:06:12,332
I used to think that too.
100
00:06:13,750 --> 00:06:15,877
I don't wanna be a writer anymore.
101
00:06:15,877 --> 00:06:16,962
What?
102
00:06:16,962 --> 00:06:19,047
There's a million other things I could do.
103
00:06:19,047 --> 00:06:21,216
My mom thinks I could be a teacher.
104
00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:24,052
Well, at least you could send yourself
to detention.
105
00:06:24,052 --> 00:06:26,513
[both giggle]
106
00:06:27,430 --> 00:06:30,350
H-Hey, Sport! Got a second?
I wanna talk to you.
107
00:06:32,185 --> 00:06:34,688
[gasps] Wait! [panting]
108
00:06:35,814 --> 00:06:37,899
[Harriet] I had to talk to him.
109
00:06:37,899 --> 00:06:42,320
So I decided to use
my ace spying skills one last time.
110
00:06:48,785 --> 00:06:49,786
[feedback whines]
111
00:06:49,786 --> 00:06:54,332
Will Sport Rocque please report
to the principal's office immediately?
112
00:06:54,332 --> 00:06:55,417
[gulps]
113
00:06:55,917 --> 00:06:57,752
[screams] Rope burn!
114
00:07:06,386 --> 00:07:07,804
Just give me a chance.
115
00:07:07,804 --> 00:07:09,556
[scoffs] I can't believe you.
116
00:07:11,016 --> 00:07:12,017
[sighs]
117
00:07:12,601 --> 00:07:13,894
[students chattering]
118
00:07:14,728 --> 00:07:17,397
Could I interest you in some pizza?
119
00:07:17,397 --> 00:07:20,483
With a side order of a sincere apology?
120
00:07:29,409 --> 00:07:30,911
- [gasps]
- Hi.
121
00:07:30,911 --> 00:07:32,412
Would you leave me alone?
122
00:07:33,496 --> 00:07:34,497
[strains]
123
00:07:36,791 --> 00:07:39,669
- Stop.
- Wallace, give me a break.
124
00:07:39,669 --> 00:07:43,590
Safety doesn't take any breaks, Sport.
It's always on the job.
125
00:07:44,090 --> 00:07:46,092
[panting]
126
00:07:46,092 --> 00:07:47,219
Thanks, Wallace.
127
00:07:47,219 --> 00:07:48,553
No thanks required.
128
00:07:48,553 --> 00:07:52,432
I'm a hall monitor, Harriet.
It's my job. It's what I do.
129
00:07:54,226 --> 00:07:55,936
Sport, I just wanna say--
130
00:07:55,936 --> 00:07:58,021
I don't wanna hear it, Harriet.
It's too late.
131
00:07:58,021 --> 00:08:00,315
Uh... [stammers]
...if you won't accept my apology,
132
00:08:00,941 --> 00:08:02,317
will you accept this?
133
00:08:03,068 --> 00:08:07,072
It's a balance sheet of all the pluses
and minuses of our friendship.
134
00:08:08,031 --> 00:08:12,911
Plus 20? For me teaching you
how to always win at Rock Paper Scissors?
135
00:08:12,911 --> 00:08:16,831
Plus ten for me checking the spelling
on your English papers.
136
00:08:16,831 --> 00:08:21,836
Plus 100 for giving you
that 3D baseball card of Mickey Mantle.
137
00:08:21,836 --> 00:08:25,507
Lot of pluses here, Harriet.
Lot of pluses.
138
00:08:26,091 --> 00:08:27,384
Some minuses too.
139
00:08:27,384 --> 00:08:32,347
Minus 820 for writing mean stuff
about my best friend.
140
00:08:32,347 --> 00:08:33,974
But when you look at the numbers,
141
00:08:33,974 --> 00:08:37,811
{\an8}I think you'll see this friendship's still
a pretty good deal.
142
00:08:37,811 --> 00:08:40,480
No, it's not. Your math is off.
143
00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:43,650
Look, you didn't carry the two here
and the three here.
144
00:08:44,275 --> 00:08:48,363
[grunts] Look, our friendship
actually adds up to minus 180.
145
00:08:49,322 --> 00:08:51,908
Just tell me what to say, and I'll say it.
146
00:08:51,908 --> 00:08:52,993
Would love to, Harriet,
147
00:08:52,993 --> 00:08:55,662
but you'll just write it in your notebook
and use it against me.
148
00:08:59,291 --> 00:09:00,875
Let him go, Harriet.
149
00:09:00,875 --> 00:09:03,712
I think Sport needs
a little space right now.
150
00:09:03,712 --> 00:09:05,088
Let him breathe.
151
00:09:07,215 --> 00:09:09,801
[Harriet]
Maybe Sport didn't wanna hear my apology,
152
00:09:10,677 --> 00:09:12,762
but I hoped my classmates would.
153
00:09:13,263 --> 00:09:16,808
I know you all hate me
like a vampire hates the sun,
154
00:09:16,808 --> 00:09:19,603
and I don't blame you
for a Transylvania second.
155
00:09:19,603 --> 00:09:20,937
[Marion] Ellen, come on!
156
00:09:21,980 --> 00:09:23,940
How am I supposed to do this scene
with one drumstick?
157
00:09:24,608 --> 00:09:26,735
[grunts] I haven't memorized my lines.
158
00:09:26,735 --> 00:09:29,571
Maybe because all you do all day is
chew your dumb hair.
159
00:09:30,238 --> 00:09:31,823
Oof.
160
00:09:32,699 --> 00:09:35,076
Congratulations, Marion.
161
00:09:35,076 --> 00:09:39,080
You've just won another first prize
for being the lousiest,
162
00:09:39,080 --> 00:09:41,166
rottenest person of the year.
163
00:09:42,542 --> 00:09:47,339
Tell me, Pinky, what's it like
being the star of the weirdo circus?
164
00:09:47,339 --> 00:09:49,466
[giggling]
165
00:09:50,050 --> 00:09:53,595
Well, at least people like
to go to my house to hang out,
166
00:09:53,595 --> 00:09:55,972
and not just because of my mother's cake.
167
00:09:57,307 --> 00:09:59,184
[Harriet] I couldn't believe it.
168
00:09:59,184 --> 00:10:03,563
The cruddy things I wrote
had turned everybody against each other.
169
00:10:03,563 --> 00:10:05,690
Children, please.
170
00:10:05,690 --> 00:10:08,526
Fall Harvest Day is about
working together,
171
00:10:08,526 --> 00:10:09,819
bringing in the crops,
172
00:10:09,819 --> 00:10:13,657
enjoying the sweet, sweet bounty
of the season.
173
00:10:13,657 --> 00:10:17,619
Sport, Janie,
you two need to come together.
174
00:10:17,619 --> 00:10:20,789
You're my tip-top tater tot team.
175
00:10:21,373 --> 00:10:26,002
We were, until I found out
that Janie gave Harriet her notebook back.
176
00:10:26,002 --> 00:10:27,462
- You did what?
- How could you?
177
00:10:27,462 --> 00:10:28,547
Why?
178
00:10:28,547 --> 00:10:30,090
She's my friend.
179
00:10:30,090 --> 00:10:32,425
[scoffs] I thought we were friends.
180
00:10:32,425 --> 00:10:35,679
Children, let's take a deep breath
181
00:10:35,679 --> 00:10:39,015
and blow away
these dark and stormy clouds.
182
00:10:41,685 --> 00:10:46,064
Harriet, I thought I saw you
peeking through the curtain.
183
00:10:46,064 --> 00:10:47,315
What's wrong?
184
00:10:47,315 --> 00:10:49,609
Everybody's fighting because of me.
185
00:10:49,609 --> 00:10:52,320
Oh, no, they're not.
186
00:10:52,320 --> 00:10:55,991
Actors are famous for being
a tad moody at times.
187
00:10:55,991 --> 00:10:58,118
[Marion]
Are you chewing your hair again? Ugh.
188
00:10:58,118 --> 00:10:59,619
[Beth Ellen] Leave me alone.
189
00:11:00,537 --> 00:11:01,538
Help.
190
00:11:03,206 --> 00:11:07,502
[sighs] Ms. Elson, I wanted to thank you
for making me be the onion.
191
00:11:07,502 --> 00:11:11,756
For a little while, it made me feel
like I had a lot of layers.
192
00:11:12,340 --> 00:11:14,509
You do have a lot of layers.
193
00:11:14,509 --> 00:11:16,928
No. I don't.
194
00:11:16,928 --> 00:11:18,889
I only have one layer,
195
00:11:18,889 --> 00:11:20,891
and it's stinky, and it's mean,
196
00:11:20,891 --> 00:11:23,101
and that's why I have to quit.
197
00:11:23,101 --> 00:11:25,854
- What?
- The play will be better without me.
198
00:11:25,854 --> 00:11:29,608
Well, what about all the new lines
and songs you wrote
199
00:11:29,608 --> 00:11:33,486
that make the side dishes feel
like heroes, Harriet?
200
00:11:33,486 --> 00:11:36,197
[sighs] Just go back to the original play.
201
00:11:36,197 --> 00:11:39,659
It'll make Marion happy,
and she's the star.
202
00:11:39,659 --> 00:11:41,870
So, anyway...
203
00:11:41,870 --> 00:11:43,872
Harriet, no.
204
00:11:43,872 --> 00:11:48,752
The sharp, sassy taste of the onion
balances out the flavor
205
00:11:48,752 --> 00:11:50,879
of all the other dishes.
206
00:11:50,879 --> 00:11:53,924
We need your savory flair.
207
00:11:53,924 --> 00:11:55,258
[Harriet] On the way home,
208
00:11:55,258 --> 00:11:58,929
it seemed like everyone was
giving me the hairy eyeball.
209
00:11:58,929 --> 00:12:00,430
Even the pigeons.
210
00:12:01,556 --> 00:12:04,142
Oh, like you're all so perfect?
211
00:12:04,142 --> 00:12:07,229
There's a reason people call you
rats with wings.
212
00:12:10,023 --> 00:12:11,024
[sighs]
213
00:12:11,733 --> 00:12:15,570
[Harriet] I started notebook number one
when I was seven years old.
214
00:12:15,570 --> 00:12:18,198
Even then, I wanted to be a great writer.
215
00:12:18,198 --> 00:12:21,701
Sixteen notebooks later, I knew the truth.
216
00:12:23,620 --> 00:12:27,040
I was gonna end up being
Harriet the hot dog guy.
217
00:12:36,132 --> 00:12:37,759
Can we talk this over?
218
00:12:38,927 --> 00:12:40,512
There's nothing left to say.
219
00:12:46,643 --> 00:12:49,729
[Mrs. Plumber] Oh, Harriet.
[chuckles] So nice to see you.
220
00:12:49,729 --> 00:12:51,940
[stammers]
Why are you dressed like an onion?
221
00:12:51,940 --> 00:12:53,233
School play.
222
00:12:54,901 --> 00:12:57,195
Why are your dogs dressed
like the Beatles?
223
00:12:57,195 --> 00:13:02,075
Oh... [chuckles] ...we've all got a bad case
of Beatlemania. [laughs]
224
00:13:02,075 --> 00:13:03,577
Right, guys? [laughs]
225
00:13:04,160 --> 00:13:05,745
Whoo!
226
00:13:05,745 --> 00:13:08,290
- [howling]
- [chuckles]
227
00:13:08,290 --> 00:13:10,333
It's my best-selling dog outfit yet.
228
00:13:10,333 --> 00:13:11,418
You okay, hon?
229
00:13:12,002 --> 00:13:13,003
I guess.
230
00:13:13,628 --> 00:13:15,881
Well, how's the writing going?
231
00:13:15,881 --> 00:13:18,216
I'm not going to be a writer anymore.
232
00:13:18,216 --> 00:13:20,427
What? [stammers] Why not?
233
00:13:20,427 --> 00:13:24,180
Ole Golly says a writer is supposed to
put love into the world.
234
00:13:24,180 --> 00:13:26,474
All I do is judge people.
235
00:13:26,474 --> 00:13:29,060
Well, did you judge me?
236
00:13:29,060 --> 00:13:30,312
Yep.
237
00:13:30,312 --> 00:13:31,396
And?
238
00:13:31,396 --> 00:13:33,398
I wrote that you were lazy.
239
00:13:33,398 --> 00:13:35,817
Then I thought you were
just a big scaredy-cat.
240
00:13:36,318 --> 00:13:40,822
Well, after you did some more spying,
what did you think?
241
00:13:40,822 --> 00:13:44,659
I thought about when I tried to change
from eating tomato sandwiches
242
00:13:44,659 --> 00:13:46,953
to tomato-and-cheese sandwiches once
243
00:13:46,953 --> 00:13:48,872
and totally chickened out.
244
00:13:48,872 --> 00:13:54,002
And how changing your whole life was
probably a million and five times scarier.
245
00:13:54,002 --> 00:13:56,004
It's hard to be brave.
246
00:13:56,588 --> 00:13:57,589
But you did it.
247
00:13:59,049 --> 00:14:02,886
It's the Dog Beatles! [scream]
248
00:14:02,886 --> 00:14:05,430
- Ooh, got to go.
- Bye, Mrs. Plumber.
249
00:14:05,430 --> 00:14:06,848
[screaming]
250
00:14:06,848 --> 00:14:07,933
Good luck.
251
00:14:09,309 --> 00:14:10,477
[meows]
252
00:14:10,477 --> 00:14:13,438
[Harriet] I started thinking about
other people on my spy route,
253
00:14:13,438 --> 00:14:16,149
like Mr. Withers and his 26 cats.
254
00:14:16,149 --> 00:14:19,778
I thought he was a spooky hermit guy
at first.
255
00:14:20,403 --> 00:14:22,739
Then I found out that his mother died
256
00:14:22,739 --> 00:14:27,410
and it made him so sad that
he just wanted to hide from the world.
257
00:14:28,828 --> 00:14:30,080
And what about Carlos?
258
00:14:30,872 --> 00:14:33,750
I thought he was
the dreaded bodega burglar.
259
00:14:33,750 --> 00:14:36,962
Then I found out that
he was just protecting his parents' deli.
260
00:14:38,004 --> 00:14:40,966
[chuckles, speaks Spanish]
261
00:14:42,509 --> 00:14:44,094
Hello, lady...
262
00:14:46,346 --> 00:14:47,764
Hello, lady onion.
263
00:14:47,764 --> 00:14:49,307
[Harriet] And now we're friends.
264
00:14:49,307 --> 00:14:50,600
[chuckles]
265
00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:54,145
I realized I judged everybody
on my route at first.
266
00:14:54,145 --> 00:14:57,274
Then I dug a little deeper
and found the truth.
267
00:14:58,608 --> 00:14:59,859
I gotta write this down.
268
00:15:02,153 --> 00:15:03,154
My notebook!
269
00:15:04,948 --> 00:15:06,199
[shrieks]
270
00:15:07,325 --> 00:15:08,743
Garbage truck, wait!
271
00:15:08,743 --> 00:15:11,288
My notebook is in the garbage.
272
00:15:11,288 --> 00:15:12,956
Stop!
273
00:15:18,670 --> 00:15:21,047
[Harriet]
"Truth is beauty, and beauty is truth."
274
00:15:21,590 --> 00:15:23,967
{\an8}That's what John Keats once said.
275
00:15:23,967 --> 00:15:27,387
{\an8}The only thing is
you just have to dig for it.
276
00:15:27,387 --> 00:15:29,514
If I could do that with strangers,
277
00:15:30,348 --> 00:15:32,809
why couldn't I do it with my friends?
278
00:15:36,187 --> 00:15:37,898
[audience chattering]
279
00:15:42,861 --> 00:15:46,156
All right, young thespians.
280
00:15:46,156 --> 00:15:48,325
Can you feel a tingle in your toes?
281
00:15:48,325 --> 00:15:50,535
It's almost showtime.
282
00:15:52,621 --> 00:15:53,872
[both struggling]
283
00:15:58,084 --> 00:16:01,796
Okay, let's use that energy.
284
00:16:03,089 --> 00:16:05,884
Good morning, everyone.
285
00:16:05,884 --> 00:16:09,804
Will you join me
in welcoming the sixth graders
286
00:16:09,804 --> 00:16:14,476
as they perform the Fall Harvest Feast?
287
00:16:14,476 --> 00:16:17,938
- [applauding]
- [piano playing jaunty melody]
288
00:16:17,938 --> 00:16:20,148
We are the yams.
289
00:16:21,608 --> 00:16:24,277
A taste so sweet to munch.
290
00:16:30,492 --> 00:16:32,369
We are the tater tots.
291
00:16:32,369 --> 00:16:34,412
Bite-size, but big on crunch.
292
00:16:38,166 --> 00:16:43,838
Um, my pungent flavor makes me shout.
I'm a-- I'm a...
293
00:16:43,838 --> 00:16:44,839
[Ms. Elson] Psst.
294
00:16:44,839 --> 00:16:47,050
"I'm a brussels sprout."
295
00:16:47,050 --> 00:16:50,762
Oh, yeah. I'm a brussels sprout!
296
00:16:50,762 --> 00:16:52,847
[piano tempo increases]
297
00:16:52,847 --> 00:16:57,936
Not to fear. The main course is here.
298
00:16:57,936 --> 00:16:58,853
[gasps]
299
00:16:59,604 --> 00:17:00,772
You guys switched sides.
300
00:17:00,772 --> 00:17:01,898
We did?
301
00:17:01,898 --> 00:17:04,359
Now everything's gonna be backwards.
302
00:17:05,360 --> 00:17:07,987
- [grunts] Whoa!
- [audience gasps]
303
00:17:07,987 --> 00:17:09,656
[grunting]
304
00:17:09,656 --> 00:17:11,116
- [yelps]
- [grunts]
305
00:17:12,617 --> 00:17:13,618
[audience gasps]
306
00:17:13,618 --> 00:17:14,828
[Janie, Sport grunt] Ow!
307
00:17:14,828 --> 00:17:16,580
[audience laughs]
308
00:17:16,580 --> 00:17:18,622
Ow! [grunts] Ow.
309
00:17:18,622 --> 00:17:20,000
Hey, watch it.
310
00:17:21,333 --> 00:17:23,420
[both struggling]
311
00:17:24,462 --> 00:17:26,046
Do you see Harriet?
312
00:17:26,631 --> 00:17:28,300
- [paper rips]
- [audience gasps]
313
00:17:29,092 --> 00:17:30,468
Never mind.
314
00:17:35,932 --> 00:17:38,518
May I have your attention, please?
315
00:17:38,518 --> 00:17:40,186
[both groan]
316
00:17:40,186 --> 00:17:45,525
[clears throat] Presenting
a death-defying tale of love and loss.
317
00:17:45,525 --> 00:17:47,444
Sound and fury.
318
00:17:47,444 --> 00:17:51,197
Folly, falsehood and forgiveness.
319
00:17:51,197 --> 00:17:55,160
I present to you, "The Onion's Lament."
320
00:17:55,744 --> 00:17:58,038
I am an onion.
321
00:17:58,038 --> 00:18:02,083
A stinky, unlovable vegetable
who makes people cry.
322
00:18:04,878 --> 00:18:09,758
Yams, I wrote that you two should join
the weirdo circus.
323
00:18:14,638 --> 00:18:17,557
But then I dug to a deeper layer
324
00:18:17,557 --> 00:18:20,644
and saw how fearless you are
about being yourself.
325
00:18:21,228 --> 00:18:22,229
I realized...
326
00:18:24,231 --> 00:18:28,151
any weirdo circus that Pinky
and Purple Socks are in
327
00:18:28,151 --> 00:18:29,903
is one I wanna join.
328
00:18:32,572 --> 00:18:33,782
Deal with it!
329
00:18:39,079 --> 00:18:41,039
I wrote in my notebook that
330
00:18:41,039 --> 00:18:45,168
people only went to Carrie Andrews' house
because of her mother's cake.
331
00:18:47,921 --> 00:18:49,923
Then I dug deeper.
332
00:18:51,049 --> 00:18:54,219
People may go to Carrie's house
for the cake,
333
00:18:54,219 --> 00:18:57,973
but the reason they stay is
because of Carrie.
334
00:18:58,557 --> 00:18:59,808
Really?
335
00:19:02,561 --> 00:19:04,271
I wrote this about Marion.
336
00:19:06,439 --> 00:19:08,733
Whoa, this is brutal even for me.
337
00:19:08,733 --> 00:19:11,361
But that was just my top layer talking.
338
00:19:12,028 --> 00:19:14,239
The one that's still mad
that in third grade,
339
00:19:14,239 --> 00:19:16,074
Marion dumped me as a friend.
340
00:19:18,660 --> 00:19:19,869
Then I dug deeper.
341
00:19:24,332 --> 00:19:29,129
Just like fall turning into winter,
a friendship can turn cold too.
342
00:19:29,129 --> 00:19:32,549
But just like with the seasons,
it's normal.
343
00:19:32,549 --> 00:19:35,302
It's natural,
and it's not anybody's fault.
344
00:19:38,722 --> 00:19:41,516
- [no audible dialogue]
- [Harriet] I wrote something for everyone.
345
00:19:46,897 --> 00:19:50,025
Rachel is like her lollipops.
346
00:19:50,025 --> 00:19:52,777
Hard on the outside, chewy on the inside.
347
00:19:57,532 --> 00:20:00,493
Beth Ellen,
I really wish we could be friends.
348
00:20:02,245 --> 00:20:03,246
Me too.
349
00:20:06,958 --> 00:20:08,501
[no audible dialogue]
350
00:20:15,342 --> 00:20:18,178
I saved the most important message
for last.
351
00:20:30,398 --> 00:20:33,652
The reason I was so hard on you is
because I was jealous
352
00:20:33,652 --> 00:20:36,655
that your dad thinks you're grown up
enough to take care of him.
353
00:20:36,655 --> 00:20:39,699
My parents won't even let me
take care of our goldfish.
354
00:20:39,699 --> 00:20:41,034
Not that I blame you.
355
00:20:41,534 --> 00:20:44,579
I fed them spaghetti once.
It did not turn out well.
356
00:20:45,997 --> 00:20:49,668
I know my parents sometimes wish
I was more like you.
357
00:20:50,627 --> 00:20:52,963
- Don't worry, sometimes I do too.
- [chuckles]
358
00:20:53,547 --> 00:20:56,800
And after what happened with the notebook
and Ole Golly moving away,
359
00:20:56,800 --> 00:20:59,261
I kinda do feel older and wiser.
360
00:20:59,844 --> 00:21:02,556
But I still want to bring
my stuffie to school,
361
00:21:02,556 --> 00:21:06,101
play town
and drink chocolate egg creams all day.
362
00:21:06,101 --> 00:21:11,481
[sighs] I know you want me to grow up
faster, but I'm really good at being 11.
363
00:21:11,481 --> 00:21:14,859
And besides, when I do finally grow up,
you'll say,
364
00:21:14,859 --> 00:21:17,487
"Oh, you were so gosh darn cute
when you were little."
365
00:21:17,487 --> 00:21:19,739
So I don't think we need to rush it.
366
00:21:21,908 --> 00:21:24,911
So, Sport, um,
367
00:21:24,911 --> 00:21:28,206
uh-- [stammers]
I-I forgot what I was going to say.
368
00:21:29,249 --> 00:21:30,333
[chuckles]
369
00:21:31,835 --> 00:21:35,589
[audience cheering, applauding]
370
00:21:38,592 --> 00:21:43,388
Bravo, bravo, brava, bravissima!
371
00:21:43,388 --> 00:21:45,891
[chuckles] I love this job.
372
00:21:50,228 --> 00:21:51,563
[applauding, cheering fades]
373
00:21:51,563 --> 00:21:56,568
From now on, I quadruple swear
to always dig deep
374
00:21:56,568 --> 00:21:58,695
and put love into the world.
375
00:21:58,695 --> 00:22:00,697
Everyone, take a page.
376
00:22:01,406 --> 00:22:04,826
[audience cheering]
377
00:22:05,660 --> 00:22:08,288
[Harriet] I kept my promise
when I joined the school paper
378
00:22:08,288 --> 00:22:11,207
and wrote a story about Wallace Walker.
379
00:22:11,207 --> 00:22:14,002
Like everybody, I thought he was a goober
380
00:22:14,002 --> 00:22:17,339
until I figured out he was a hero.
381
00:22:19,090 --> 00:22:22,844
The splinter feeling in my stomach
eventually went away.
382
00:22:23,637 --> 00:22:26,598
But I still missed Ole Golly like mad.
383
00:22:26,598 --> 00:22:31,853
Luckily, the most important thing
she taught me will live inside me forever.
384
00:22:32,437 --> 00:22:36,107
If you want to be a great writer,
you have to know everything.
385
00:22:36,107 --> 00:22:40,028
And to know everything,
you need to see everything.
386
00:22:40,028 --> 00:22:44,741
And to see everything,
you need to be a spy.
387
00:22:49,329 --> 00:22:51,748
♪ I just wanna be
You just wanna be ♪
388
00:22:51,748 --> 00:22:53,458
♪ We just wanna be ♪
389
00:22:54,584 --> 00:22:57,128
♪ I don't wanna be
You don't wanna be ♪
390
00:22:57,128 --> 00:23:02,717
♪ We don't wanna be told what to do ♪
391
00:23:04,886 --> 00:23:10,559
♪ And I try my best to do good
In the neighborhood ♪
392
00:23:10,559 --> 00:23:13,103
♪ I smile real nice ♪
393
00:23:13,103 --> 00:23:16,398
♪ And I strive to tell the truth ♪
394
00:23:16,398 --> 00:23:18,984
♪ I just wanna be
You just wanna be ♪
395
00:23:18,984 --> 00:23:20,902
♪ We just wanna be ♪
396
00:23:21,778 --> 00:23:24,531
♪ I don't wanna be
You don't wanna be ♪
397
00:23:24,531 --> 00:23:27,367
♪ We don't wanna be told what to do ♪
398
00:23:27,367 --> 00:23:29,953
♪ I am gonna be who I wanna be ♪
399
00:23:29,953 --> 00:23:31,621
♪ My autonomy ♪
400
00:23:32,664 --> 00:23:35,458
♪ I just wanna be
You just wanna be ♪
401
00:23:35,458 --> 00:23:37,460
♪ We just wanna be ♪
402
00:23:37,460 --> 00:23:40,297
♪ No, I won't cut my hair ♪
403
00:23:40,297 --> 00:23:42,966
♪ And I'll wear whatever ♪
404
00:23:42,966 --> 00:23:48,638
♪ I like it when I get to be myself ♪
405
00:23:48,638 --> 00:23:51,558
♪ I don't wanna be
You don't wanna be ♪
406
00:23:51,558 --> 00:23:56,229
♪ We don't wanna be told what to do ♪