1
00:00:05,756 --> 00:00:08,926
[Harriet] After everything
went kablooey at the trial...
2
00:00:08,926 --> 00:00:11,086
[sighs] ...I couldn't sleep.
3
00:00:11,094 --> 00:00:12,804
I felt too ashamed.
4
00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:16,231
The raw onion I ate didn't help.
5
00:00:16,225 --> 00:00:20,645
So, before the sun came up,
I decided to go outside
6
00:00:20,646 --> 00:00:24,396
and take my first look
at the fall harvest moon.
7
00:00:24,399 --> 00:00:25,479
[sighs]
8
00:00:26,193 --> 00:00:30,363
Every year, I make a wish
on that wild, orange moon.
9
00:00:30,989 --> 00:00:35,119
None of them ever came true,
except the one I made that night.
10
00:00:35,118 --> 00:00:36,248
[gasps]
11
00:00:38,330 --> 00:00:39,710
My notebook!
12
00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:44,248
I thought it was gone forever.
13
00:00:44,253 --> 00:00:45,963
It obviously wasn't a trap
14
00:00:45,963 --> 00:00:49,593
because a safe didn't fall on me
when I picked it up.
15
00:00:50,592 --> 00:00:52,642
So who had dropped it off?
16
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:54,390
Maybe it didn't matter.
17
00:00:59,017 --> 00:01:03,687
All I cared about was that it was back
and that there was a ton of writing to do.
18
00:01:09,611 --> 00:01:13,031
The weird thing was
my brain was on the fritz.
19
00:01:13,031 --> 00:01:16,491
So I decided to do what I always did
when I felt stuck.
20
00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:19,407
I went on an emergency spy mission.
21
00:01:29,214 --> 00:01:30,224
[groans]
22
00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:35,353
[meowing]
23
00:01:40,809 --> 00:01:41,809
[groans]
24
00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:44,270
[meowing continues]
25
00:01:48,233 --> 00:01:51,323
♪ The $10,000 tower ♪
26
00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:54,490
♪ It's full of power and money ♪
27
00:01:55,032 --> 00:01:56,412
[groans]
28
00:01:57,826 --> 00:01:59,786
Why can't I think of anything?
29
00:02:00,370 --> 00:02:02,830
It's because I'm too dangerous, Harriet.
30
00:02:02,831 --> 00:02:06,041
Everything you write in me
just hurts other people.
31
00:02:06,043 --> 00:02:08,043
It ain't pretty, kid.
32
00:02:08,628 --> 00:02:12,088
But Ole Golly said I never had to
apologize for telling the truth.
33
00:02:12,591 --> 00:02:16,471
Uh-huh. And how'd that work out for you,
Goldilocks?
34
00:02:17,429 --> 00:02:21,519
[Harriet] That splinter feeling
in my stomach suddenly started jabbing me.
35
00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:24,770
It was like it was telling me
something I already knew
36
00:02:24,770 --> 00:02:27,060
but was too scared to admit.
37
00:02:27,773 --> 00:02:30,323
I can't be a writer.
38
00:02:31,860 --> 00:02:34,530
{\an8}♪ I just wanna be
You just wanna be ♪
39
00:02:34,530 --> 00:02:36,280
♪ We just wanna be ♪
40
00:02:37,407 --> 00:02:39,867
♪ I am gonna be who I wanna be ♪
41
00:02:39,868 --> 00:02:41,538
♪ My autonomy ♪
42
00:02:42,037 --> 00:02:45,077
♪ No, I won't cut my hair ♪
43
00:02:45,082 --> 00:02:47,422
♪ And I'll wear whatever ♪
44
00:02:47,417 --> 00:02:53,417
♪ I like it when I get to be myself ♪
45
00:02:53,423 --> 00:02:56,053
♪ I don't wanna be
You don't wanna be ♪
46
00:02:56,051 --> 00:03:00,221
{\an8}♪ We don't wanna be told what to do ♪
47
00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:06,023
[Harriet]
As I watched people heading off to work,
48
00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:07,649
I began to wonder.
49
00:03:07,646 --> 00:03:10,856
If I wasn't going to be a writer,
what could I be?
50
00:03:11,984 --> 00:03:13,864
[squeegee squeaking]
51
00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:17,072
Harriet the window washer?
52
00:03:19,575 --> 00:03:20,735
[bicycle tires screech]
53
00:03:21,827 --> 00:03:23,497
Harriet the florist?
54
00:03:26,582 --> 00:03:29,792
What about Harriet the hot dog man?
55
00:03:30,711 --> 00:03:31,841
[sighs]
56
00:03:32,671 --> 00:03:34,761
Harriet? What are you doing out here?
57
00:03:35,340 --> 00:03:36,510
Just thinking.
58
00:03:36,508 --> 00:03:39,338
If I wasn't a writer,
what else do you think I could be?
59
00:03:39,344 --> 00:03:41,974
Well, there's lots of great opportunities
out there
60
00:03:41,972 --> 00:03:43,892
for someone as smart as you.
61
00:03:43,891 --> 00:03:45,431
You could be a doctor.
62
00:03:45,434 --> 00:03:47,524
I can't stand the sight of blood.
63
00:03:47,519 --> 00:03:48,979
What about a teacher?
64
00:03:48,979 --> 00:03:51,769
I'm allergic to getting hit by spitballs.
65
00:03:52,482 --> 00:03:54,822
How about an astronaut?
You could go to the moon.
66
00:03:54,818 --> 00:03:58,278
Dad, I get nauseous when we get in the car
to go to Grandma's.
67
00:04:00,449 --> 00:04:01,829
We're just trying to help.
68
00:04:01,825 --> 00:04:04,945
I know. I just wanna be alone, okay?
69
00:04:07,497 --> 00:04:11,587
Harriet, this came in the mail yesterday
while you were out with your mom.
70
00:04:13,378 --> 00:04:14,378
Ole Golly?
71
00:04:17,007 --> 00:04:20,467
[Ole Golly] Harriet, you'll remember
that I told you many times
72
00:04:20,469 --> 00:04:21,549
Keats once said,
73
00:04:21,553 --> 00:04:25,523
"Truth is beauty, and beauty is truth."
74
00:04:25,516 --> 00:04:28,686
And I'm glad you used your notebook
to tell your truth.
75
00:04:28,685 --> 00:04:32,605
Naturally, those notebooks should not
be read by anybody else.
76
00:04:32,606 --> 00:04:38,736
But if they are, then, Harriet,
you're going to have to do one thing.
77
00:04:38,737 --> 00:04:42,867
And you won't like it.
You will have to apologize.
78
00:04:43,450 --> 00:04:44,950
Apologize?
79
00:04:44,952 --> 00:04:49,002
Remember that writing is
to put love in the world,
80
00:04:48,997 --> 00:04:51,077
not to use against your friends.
81
00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:54,592
[Harriet]
It wasn't what I expected to hear,
82
00:04:55,254 --> 00:04:58,134
but I knew exactly
where her words of wisdom would take me.
83
00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:10,693
Janie, I'm sorry.
84
00:05:10,686 --> 00:05:15,266
The mean stuff I wrote in my notebook,
not apologizing last night, everything.
85
00:05:16,650 --> 00:05:19,780
You're not a mad, bad scientist.
I was just jealous.
86
00:05:19,778 --> 00:05:21,108
[chokes] Jealous?
87
00:05:21,113 --> 00:05:24,453
I'm a pretend writer
whose words hurt people.
88
00:05:24,449 --> 00:05:28,829
You're a scientist-scientist who's trying
to make the world a better place.
89
00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:30,749
[chuckles] I don't know about that.
90
00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:33,787
I was trying to synthesize
a new kind of energy source yesterday,
91
00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:36,802
and I accidentally vaporized
my nostril hair.
92
00:05:39,381 --> 00:05:42,131
[both laughing]
93
00:05:45,596 --> 00:05:47,426
I'm so sorry, Janie.
94
00:05:48,974 --> 00:05:50,144
Forgiven.
95
00:05:55,647 --> 00:05:56,647
Buffalo?
96
00:05:57,649 --> 00:05:58,689
Thanks.
97
00:06:02,446 --> 00:06:05,276
Were you the one who dropped off
my notebook last night?
98
00:06:05,282 --> 00:06:10,412
Yep. You without your notebook is
like Albert Einstein without his violin.
99
00:06:10,412 --> 00:06:12,292
I used to think that too.
100
00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:15,827
I don't wanna be a writer anymore.
101
00:06:15,834 --> 00:06:16,924
What?
102
00:06:16,919 --> 00:06:18,999
There's a million other things I could do.
103
00:06:19,004 --> 00:06:21,174
My mom thinks I could be a teacher.
104
00:06:21,757 --> 00:06:24,007
Well, at least you could send yourself
to detention.
105
00:06:24,009 --> 00:06:26,469
[both giggle]
106
00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:30,307
H-Hey, Sport! Got a second?
I wanna talk to you.
107
00:06:32,142 --> 00:06:34,652
[gasps] Wait! [panting]
108
00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:37,861
[Harriet] I had to talk to him.
109
00:06:37,856 --> 00:06:42,276
So I decided to use
my ace spying skills one last time.
110
00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:49,742
[feedback whines]
111
00:06:49,743 --> 00:06:54,293
Will Sport Rocque please report
to the principal's office immediately?
112
00:06:54,289 --> 00:06:55,369
[gulps]
113
00:06:55,874 --> 00:06:57,714
[screams] Rope burn!
114
00:07:06,343 --> 00:07:07,763
Just give me a chance.
115
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:09,511
[scoffs] I can't believe you.
116
00:07:10,973 --> 00:07:11,973
[sighs]
117
00:07:12,558 --> 00:07:13,848
[students chattering]
118
00:07:14,685 --> 00:07:17,345
Could I interest you in some pizza?
119
00:07:17,354 --> 00:07:20,444
With a side order of a sincere apology?
120
00:07:29,366 --> 00:07:30,866
- [gasps]
- Hi.
121
00:07:30,868 --> 00:07:32,368
Would you leave me alone?
122
00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:34,453
[strains]
123
00:07:36,748 --> 00:07:39,628
- Stop.
- Wallace, give me a break.
124
00:07:39,626 --> 00:07:43,546
Safety doesn't take any breaks, Sport.
It's always on the job.
125
00:07:44,047 --> 00:07:46,047
[panting]
126
00:07:46,049 --> 00:07:47,179
Thanks, Wallace.
127
00:07:47,176 --> 00:07:48,506
No thanks required.
128
00:07:48,510 --> 00:07:52,390
I'm a hall monitor, Harriet.
It's my job. It's what I do.
129
00:07:54,183 --> 00:07:55,893
Sport, I just wanna say...
130
00:07:55,893 --> 00:07:57,983
I don't wanna hear it, Harriet.
It's too late.
131
00:07:57,978 --> 00:08:00,268
Uh... [stammers]
...if you won't accept my apology,
132
00:08:00,898 --> 00:08:02,268
will you accept this?
133
00:08:03,025 --> 00:08:07,025
It's a balance sheet of all the pluses
and minuses of our friendship.
134
00:08:07,988 --> 00:08:12,868
Plus 20? For me teaching you
how to always win at Rock Paper Scissors?
135
00:08:12,868 --> 00:08:16,788
Plus ten for me checking the spelling
on your English papers.
136
00:08:16,788 --> 00:08:21,788
Plus 100 for giving you
that 3D baseball card of Mickey Mantle.
137
00:08:21,793 --> 00:08:25,463
Lot of pluses here, Harriet.
Lot of pluses.
138
00:08:26,048 --> 00:08:27,338
Some minuses too.
139
00:08:27,341 --> 00:08:32,301
Minus 820 for writing mean stuff
about my best friend.
140
00:08:32,304 --> 00:08:33,934
But when you look at the numbers,
141
00:08:33,931 --> 00:08:37,771
{\an8}I think you'll see this friendship's still
a pretty good deal.
142
00:08:37,768 --> 00:08:40,438
No, it's not. Your math is off.
143
00:08:40,437 --> 00:08:43,607
Look, you didn't carry the two here
and the three here.
144
00:08:44,232 --> 00:08:48,322
[grunts] Look, our friendship
actually adds up to minus 180.
145
00:08:49,279 --> 00:08:51,869
Just tell me what to say, and I'll say it.
146
00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:52,945
Would love to, Harriet,
147
00:08:52,950 --> 00:08:55,620
but you'll just write it in your notebook
and use it against me.
148
00:08:59,248 --> 00:09:00,828
Let him go, Harriet.
149
00:09:00,832 --> 00:09:03,672
I think Sport needs
a little space right now.
150
00:09:03,669 --> 00:09:05,049
Let him breathe.
151
00:09:07,172 --> 00:09:09,762
[Harriet]
Maybe Sport didn't wanna hear my apology,
152
00:09:10,634 --> 00:09:12,724
but I hoped my classmates would.
153
00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:16,770
I know you all hate me
like a vampire hates the sun,
154
00:09:16,765 --> 00:09:19,555
and I don't blame you
for a Transylvania second.
155
00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:20,890
[Marion] Ellen, come on!
156
00:09:21,937 --> 00:09:23,897
How am I supposed to do this scene
with one drumstick?
157
00:09:24,565 --> 00:09:26,685
[grunts] I haven't memorized my lines.
158
00:09:26,692 --> 00:09:29,532
Maybe because all you do all day is
chew your dumb hair.
159
00:09:30,195 --> 00:09:31,775
Oof.
160
00:09:32,656 --> 00:09:35,026
Congratulations, Marion.
161
00:09:35,033 --> 00:09:39,043
You've just won another first prize
for being the lousiest,
162
00:09:39,037 --> 00:09:41,117
rottenest person of the year.
163
00:09:42,499 --> 00:09:47,299
Tell me, Pinky, what's it like
being the star of the weirdo circus?
164
00:09:47,296 --> 00:09:49,416
[giggling]
165
00:09:50,007 --> 00:09:53,547
Well, at least people like
to go to my house to hang out,
166
00:09:53,552 --> 00:09:55,932
and not just because of my mother's cake.
167
00:09:57,264 --> 00:09:59,144
[Harriet] I couldn't believe it.
168
00:09:59,141 --> 00:10:03,521
The cruddy things I wrote
had turned everybody against each other.
169
00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:05,650
Children, please.
170
00:10:05,647 --> 00:10:08,477
Fall Harvest Day is about
working together,
171
00:10:08,483 --> 00:10:09,783
bringing in the crops,
172
00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:13,606
enjoying the sweet, sweet bounty
of the season.
173
00:10:13,614 --> 00:10:17,584
Sport, Janie,
you two need to come together.
174
00:10:17,576 --> 00:10:20,746
You're my tip-top tater tot team.
175
00:10:21,330 --> 00:10:25,960
We were, until I found out
that Janie gave Harriet her notebook back.
176
00:10:25,959 --> 00:10:27,419
- You did what?
- How could you?
177
00:10:27,419 --> 00:10:28,499
Why?
178
00:10:28,504 --> 00:10:30,054
She's my friend.
179
00:10:30,047 --> 00:10:32,377
[scoffs] I thought we were friends.
180
00:10:32,382 --> 00:10:35,642
Children, let's take a deep breath
181
00:10:35,636 --> 00:10:38,966
and blow away
these dark and stormy clouds.
182
00:10:41,642 --> 00:10:46,022
Harriet, I thought I saw you
peeking through the curtain.
183
00:10:46,021 --> 00:10:47,271
What's wrong?
184
00:10:47,272 --> 00:10:49,572
Everybody's fighting because of me.
185
00:10:49,566 --> 00:10:52,276
Oh, no, they're not.
186
00:10:52,277 --> 00:10:55,947
Actors are famous for being
a tad moody at times.
187
00:10:55,948 --> 00:10:58,078
[Marion]
Are you chewing your hair again? Ugh.
188
00:10:58,075 --> 00:10:59,575
[Beth Ellen] Leave me alone.
189
00:11:00,494 --> 00:11:01,504
Help.
190
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:07,463
[sighs] Ms. Elson, I wanted to thank you
for making me be the onion.
191
00:11:07,459 --> 00:11:11,709
For a little while, it made me feel
like I had a lot of layers.
192
00:11:12,297 --> 00:11:14,467
You do have a lot of layers.
193
00:11:14,466 --> 00:11:16,886
No. I don't.
194
00:11:16,885 --> 00:11:18,845
I only have one layer,
195
00:11:18,846 --> 00:11:20,846
and it's stinky, and it's mean,
196
00:11:20,848 --> 00:11:23,058
and that's why I have to quit.
197
00:11:23,058 --> 00:11:25,808
- What?
- The play will be better without me.
198
00:11:25,811 --> 00:11:29,571
Well, what about all the new lines
and songs you wrote
199
00:11:29,565 --> 00:11:33,435
that make the side dishes feel
like heroes, Harriet?
200
00:11:33,443 --> 00:11:36,153
[sighs] Just go back to the original play.
201
00:11:36,154 --> 00:11:39,624
It'll make Marion happy,
and she's the star.
202
00:11:39,616 --> 00:11:41,826
So, anyway...
203
00:11:41,827 --> 00:11:43,827
Harriet, no.
204
00:11:43,829 --> 00:11:48,709
The sharp, sassy taste of the onion
balances out the flavor
205
00:11:48,709 --> 00:11:50,839
of all the other dishes.
206
00:11:50,836 --> 00:11:53,876
We need your savory flair.
207
00:11:53,881 --> 00:11:55,221
[Harriet] On the way home,
208
00:11:55,215 --> 00:11:58,885
it seemed like everyone was
giving me the hairy eyeball.
209
00:11:58,886 --> 00:12:00,386
Even the pigeons.
210
00:12:01,513 --> 00:12:04,103
Oh, like you're all so perfect?
211
00:12:04,099 --> 00:12:07,189
There's a reason people call you
rats with wings.
212
00:12:09,980 --> 00:12:10,980
[sighs]
213
00:12:11,690 --> 00:12:15,530
[Harriet] I started notebook number one
when I was seven years old.
214
00:12:15,527 --> 00:12:18,157
Even then, I wanted to be a great writer.
215
00:12:18,155 --> 00:12:21,655
Sixteen notebooks later, I knew the truth.
216
00:12:23,577 --> 00:12:26,997
I was gonna end up being
Harriet the hot dog guy.
217
00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:37,719
Can we talk this over?
218
00:12:38,884 --> 00:12:40,474
There's nothing left to say.
219
00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:49,690
[Mrs. Plumber] Oh, Harriet.
[chuckles] So nice to see you.
220
00:12:49,686 --> 00:12:51,896
[stammers]
Why are you dressed like an onion?
221
00:12:51,897 --> 00:12:53,187
School play.
222
00:12:54,858 --> 00:12:57,148
Why are your dogs dressed
like the Beatles?
223
00:12:57,152 --> 00:13:02,032
Oh... [chuckles] ...we've all got a bad case
of Beatlemania. [laughs]
224
00:13:02,032 --> 00:13:03,532
Right, guys? [laughs]
225
00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:05,697
Whoo!
226
00:13:05,702 --> 00:13:08,252
- [howling]
- [chuckles]
227
00:13:08,247 --> 00:13:10,287
It's my best-selling dog outfit yet.
228
00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:11,380
You okay, hon?
229
00:13:11,959 --> 00:13:12,959
I guess.
230
00:13:13,585 --> 00:13:15,835
Well, how's the writing going?
231
00:13:15,838 --> 00:13:18,168
I'm not going to be a writer anymore.
232
00:13:18,173 --> 00:13:20,383
What? [stammers] Why not?
233
00:13:20,384 --> 00:13:24,144
Ole Golly says a writer is supposed to
put love into the world.
234
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:26,427
All I do is judge people.
235
00:13:26,431 --> 00:13:29,021
Well, did you judge me?
236
00:13:29,017 --> 00:13:30,267
Yep.
237
00:13:30,269 --> 00:13:31,349
And?
238
00:13:31,353 --> 00:13:33,363
I wrote that you were lazy.
239
00:13:33,355 --> 00:13:35,765
Then I thought you were
just a big scaredy-cat.
240
00:13:36,275 --> 00:13:40,775
Well, after you did some more spying,
what did you think?
241
00:13:40,779 --> 00:13:44,619
I thought about when I tried to change
from eating tomato sandwiches
242
00:13:44,616 --> 00:13:46,906
to tomato-and-cheese sandwiches once
243
00:13:46,910 --> 00:13:48,830
and totally chickened out.
244
00:13:48,829 --> 00:13:53,959
And how changing your whole life was
probably a million and five times scarier.
245
00:13:53,959 --> 00:13:55,959
It's hard to be brave.
246
00:13:56,545 --> 00:13:57,545
But you did it.
247
00:13:59,006 --> 00:14:02,836
It's the Dog Beatles! [scream]
248
00:14:02,843 --> 00:14:05,393
- Ooh, got to go.
- Bye, Mrs. Plumber.
249
00:14:05,387 --> 00:14:06,807
[screaming]
250
00:14:06,805 --> 00:14:07,885
Good luck.
251
00:14:09,266 --> 00:14:10,426
[meows]
252
00:14:10,434 --> 00:14:13,404
[Harriet] I started thinking about
other people on my spy route,
253
00:14:13,395 --> 00:14:16,105
like Mr. Withers and his 26 cats.
254
00:14:16,106 --> 00:14:19,736
I thought he was a spooky hermit guy
at first.
255
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:22,700
Then I found out that his mother died
256
00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:27,366
and it made him so sad that
he just wanted to hide from the world.
257
00:14:28,785 --> 00:14:30,035
And what about Carlos?
258
00:14:30,829 --> 00:14:33,709
I thought he was
the dreaded bodega burglar.
259
00:14:33,707 --> 00:14:36,917
Then I found out that
he was just protecting his parents' deli.
260
00:14:37,961 --> 00:14:40,921
[chuckles, speaks Spanish]
261
00:14:42,466 --> 00:14:44,046
Hello, lady...
262
00:14:46,303 --> 00:14:47,723
Hello, lady onion.
263
00:14:47,721 --> 00:14:49,261
[Harriet] And now we're friends.
264
00:14:49,264 --> 00:14:50,564
[chuckles]
265
00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:54,097
I realized I judged everybody
on my route at first.
266
00:14:54,102 --> 00:14:57,232
Then I dug a little deeper
and found the truth.
267
00:14:58,565 --> 00:14:59,815
I gotta write this down.
268
00:15:02,110 --> 00:15:03,110
My notebook!
269
00:15:04,905 --> 00:15:06,155
[shrieks]
270
00:15:07,282 --> 00:15:08,702
Garbage truck, wait!
271
00:15:08,700 --> 00:15:11,250
My notebook is in the garbage.
272
00:15:11,245 --> 00:15:12,905
Stop!
273
00:15:18,627 --> 00:15:20,997
[Harriet]
"Truth is beauty, and beauty is truth."
274
00:15:21,547 --> 00:15:23,917
{\an8}That's what John Keats once said.
275
00:15:23,924 --> 00:15:27,344
{\an8}The only thing is
you just have to dig for it.
276
00:15:27,344 --> 00:15:29,474
If I could do that with strangers,
277
00:15:30,305 --> 00:15:32,765
why couldn't I do it with my friends?
278
00:15:36,144 --> 00:15:37,864
[audience chattering]
279
00:15:42,818 --> 00:15:46,108
All right, young thespians.
280
00:15:46,113 --> 00:15:48,283
Can you feel a tingle in your toes?
281
00:15:48,282 --> 00:15:50,492
It's almost showtime.
282
00:15:52,578 --> 00:15:53,828
[both struggling]
283
00:15:58,041 --> 00:16:01,751
Okay, let's use that energy.
284
00:16:03,046 --> 00:16:05,836
Good morning, everyone.
285
00:16:05,841 --> 00:16:09,761
Will you join me
in welcoming the sixth graders
286
00:16:09,761 --> 00:16:14,431
as they perform the Fall Harvest Feast?
287
00:16:14,433 --> 00:16:17,903
- [applauding]
- [piano playing jaunty melody]
288
00:16:17,895 --> 00:16:20,105
We are the yams.
289
00:16:21,565 --> 00:16:24,225
A taste so sweet to munch.
290
00:16:30,449 --> 00:16:32,329
We are the tater tots.
291
00:16:32,326 --> 00:16:34,366
Bite-size, but big on crunch.
292
00:16:38,123 --> 00:16:43,803
Um, my pungent flavor makes me shout.
I'm a... I'm a...
293
00:16:43,795 --> 00:16:44,795
[Ms. Elson] Psst.
294
00:16:44,796 --> 00:16:47,006
"I'm a brussels sprout."
295
00:16:47,007 --> 00:16:50,717
Oh, yeah. I'm a brussels sprout!
296
00:16:50,719 --> 00:16:52,799
[piano tempo increases]
297
00:16:52,804 --> 00:16:57,894
Not to fear. The main course is here.
298
00:16:57,893 --> 00:16:58,813
[gasps]
299
00:16:59,561 --> 00:17:00,731
You guys switched sides.
300
00:17:00,729 --> 00:17:01,859
We did?
301
00:17:01,855 --> 00:17:04,315
Now everything's gonna be backwards.
302
00:17:05,317 --> 00:17:07,937
- [grunts] Whoa!
- [audience gasps]
303
00:17:07,944 --> 00:17:09,614
[grunting]
304
00:17:09,613 --> 00:17:11,073
- [yelps]
- [grunts]
305
00:17:12,574 --> 00:17:13,584
[audience gasps]
306
00:17:13,575 --> 00:17:14,785
[Janie, Sport grunt] Ow!
307
00:17:14,785 --> 00:17:16,535
[audience laughs]
308
00:17:16,537 --> 00:17:18,577
Ow! [grunts] Ow.
309
00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:19,959
Hey, watch it.
310
00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:23,380
[both struggling]
311
00:17:24,419 --> 00:17:25,999
Do you see Harriet?
312
00:17:26,588 --> 00:17:28,258
- [paper rips]
- [audience gasps]
313
00:17:29,049 --> 00:17:30,429
Never mind.
314
00:17:35,889 --> 00:17:38,479
May I have your attention, please?
315
00:17:38,475 --> 00:17:40,135
[both groan]
316
00:17:40,143 --> 00:17:45,483
[clears throat] Presenting
a death-defying tale of love and loss.
317
00:17:45,482 --> 00:17:47,402
Sound and fury.
318
00:17:47,401 --> 00:17:51,151
Folly, falsehood and forgiveness.
319
00:17:51,154 --> 00:17:55,124
I present to you, "The Onion's Lament."
320
00:17:55,701 --> 00:17:58,001
I am an onion.
321
00:17:57,995 --> 00:18:02,035
A stinky, unlovable vegetable
who makes people cry.
322
00:18:04,835 --> 00:18:09,715
Yams, I wrote that you two should join
the weirdo circus.
323
00:18:14,595 --> 00:18:17,505
But then I dug to a deeper layer
324
00:18:17,514 --> 00:18:20,604
and saw how fearless you are
about being yourself.
325
00:18:21,185 --> 00:18:22,185
I realized...
326
00:18:24,188 --> 00:18:28,108
any weirdo circus that Pinky
and Purple Socks are in
327
00:18:28,108 --> 00:18:29,858
is one I wanna join.
328
00:18:32,529 --> 00:18:33,739
Deal with it!
329
00:18:39,036 --> 00:18:40,996
I wrote in my notebook that
330
00:18:40,996 --> 00:18:45,126
people only went to Carrie Andrews' house
because of her mother's cake.
331
00:18:47,878 --> 00:18:49,878
Then I dug deeper.
332
00:18:51,006 --> 00:18:54,176
People may go to Carrie's house
for the cake,
333
00:18:54,176 --> 00:18:57,926
but the reason they stay is
because of Carrie.
334
00:18:58,514 --> 00:18:59,774
Really?
335
00:19:02,518 --> 00:19:04,228
I wrote this about Marion.
336
00:19:06,396 --> 00:19:08,686
Whoa, this is brutal even for me.
337
00:19:08,690 --> 00:19:11,320
But that was just my top layer talking.
338
00:19:11,985 --> 00:19:14,195
The one that's still mad
that in third grade,
339
00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:16,026
Marion dumped me as a friend.
340
00:19:18,617 --> 00:19:19,827
Then I dug deeper.
341
00:19:24,289 --> 00:19:29,089
Just like fall turning into winter,
a friendship can turn cold too.
342
00:19:29,086 --> 00:19:32,506
But just like with the seasons,
it's normal.
343
00:19:32,506 --> 00:19:35,256
It's natural,
and it's not anybody's fault.
344
00:19:38,679 --> 00:19:41,469
- [no audible dialogue]
- [Harriet] I wrote something for everyone.
345
00:19:46,854 --> 00:19:49,984
Rachel is like her lollipops.
346
00:19:49,982 --> 00:19:52,732
Hard on the outside, chewy on the inside.
347
00:19:57,489 --> 00:20:00,449
Beth Ellen,
I really wish we could be friends.
348
00:20:02,202 --> 00:20:03,202
Me too.
349
00:20:06,915 --> 00:20:08,455
[no audible dialogue]
350
00:20:15,299 --> 00:20:18,139
I saved the most important message
for last.
351
00:20:30,355 --> 00:20:33,605
The reason I was so hard on you is
because I was jealous
352
00:20:33,609 --> 00:20:36,609
that your dad thinks you're grown up
enough to take care of him.
353
00:20:36,612 --> 00:20:39,662
My parents won't even let me
take care of our goldfish.
354
00:20:39,656 --> 00:20:40,986
Not that I blame you.
355
00:20:41,491 --> 00:20:44,541
I fed them spaghetti once.
It did not turn out well.
356
00:20:45,954 --> 00:20:49,634
I know my parents sometimes wish
I was more like you.
357
00:20:50,584 --> 00:20:52,924
- Don't worry, sometimes I do too.
- [chuckles]
358
00:20:53,504 --> 00:20:56,764
And after what happened with the notebook
and Ole Golly moving away,
359
00:20:56,757 --> 00:20:59,217
I kinda do feel older and wiser.
360
00:20:59,801 --> 00:21:02,511
But I still want to bring
my stuffie to school,
361
00:21:02,513 --> 00:21:06,063
play town
and drink chocolate egg creams all day.
362
00:21:06,058 --> 00:21:11,438
[sighs] I know you want me to grow up
faster, but I'm really good at being 11.
363
00:21:11,438 --> 00:21:14,818
And besides, when I do finally grow up,
you'll say,
364
00:21:14,816 --> 00:21:17,436
"Oh, you were so gosh darn cute
when you were little."
365
00:21:17,444 --> 00:21:19,704
So I don't think we need to rush it.
366
00:21:21,865 --> 00:21:24,865
So, Sport, um,
367
00:21:24,868 --> 00:21:28,158
uh... [stammers]
I-I forgot what I was going to say.
368
00:21:29,206 --> 00:21:30,286
[chuckles]
369
00:21:31,792 --> 00:21:35,552
[audience cheering, applauding]
370
00:21:38,549 --> 00:21:43,349
Bravo, bravo, brava, bravissima!
371
00:21:43,345 --> 00:21:45,845
[chuckles] I love this job.
372
00:21:50,185 --> 00:21:51,515
[applauding, cheering fades]
373
00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:56,530
From now on, I quadruple swear
to always dig deep
374
00:21:56,525 --> 00:21:58,645
and put love into the world.
375
00:21:58,652 --> 00:22:00,652
Everyone, take a page.
376
00:22:01,363 --> 00:22:04,783
[audience cheering]
377
00:22:05,617 --> 00:22:08,247
[Harriet] I kept my promise
when I joined the school paper
378
00:22:08,245 --> 00:22:11,155
and wrote a story about Wallace Walker.
379
00:22:11,164 --> 00:22:13,964
Like everybody, I thought he was a goober
380
00:22:13,959 --> 00:22:17,299
until I figured out he was a hero.
381
00:22:19,047 --> 00:22:22,797
The splinter feeling in my stomach
eventually went away.
382
00:22:23,594 --> 00:22:26,564
But I still missed Ole Golly like mad.
383
00:22:26,555 --> 00:22:31,805
Luckily, the most important thing
she taught me will live inside me forever.
384
00:22:32,394 --> 00:22:36,064
If you want to be a great writer,
you have to know everything.
385
00:22:36,064 --> 00:22:39,994
And to know everything,
you need to see everything.
386
00:22:39,985 --> 00:22:44,695
And to see everything,
you need to be a spy.
387
00:22:49,286 --> 00:22:51,706
♪ I just wanna be
You just wanna be ♪
388
00:22:51,705 --> 00:22:53,415
♪ We just wanna be ♪
389
00:22:54,541 --> 00:22:57,091
♪ I don't wanna be
You don't wanna be ♪
390
00:22:57,085 --> 00:23:02,665
♪ We don't wanna be told what to do ♪
391
00:23:04,843 --> 00:23:10,523
♪ And I try my best to do good
In the neighborhood ♪
392
00:23:10,516 --> 00:23:13,056
♪ I smile real nice ♪
393
00:23:13,060 --> 00:23:16,360
♪ And I strive to tell the truth ♪
394
00:23:16,355 --> 00:23:18,935
♪ I just wanna be
You just wanna be ♪
395
00:23:18,941 --> 00:23:20,861
♪ We just wanna be ♪
396
00:23:21,735 --> 00:23:24,485
♪ I don't wanna be
You don't wanna be ♪
397
00:23:24,488 --> 00:23:27,318
♪ We don't wanna be told what to do ♪
398
00:23:27,324 --> 00:23:29,914
♪ I am gonna be who I wanna be ♪
399
00:23:29,910 --> 00:23:31,580
♪ My autonomy ♪
400
00:23:32,621 --> 00:23:35,421
♪ I just wanna be
You just wanna be ♪
401
00:23:35,415 --> 00:23:37,415
♪ We just wanna be ♪
402
00:23:37,417 --> 00:23:40,247
♪ No, I won't cut my hair ♪
403
00:23:40,254 --> 00:23:42,924
♪ And I'll wear whatever ♪
404
00:23:42,923 --> 00:23:48,603
♪ I like it when I get to be myself ♪
405
00:23:48,595 --> 00:23:51,515
♪ I don't wanna be
You don't wanna be ♪
406
00:23:51,515 --> 00:23:56,185
♪ We don't wanna be told what to do ♪