1 00:00:02,043 --> 00:00:03,243 ENGINE REVS 2 00:00:11,323 --> 00:00:12,763 SAT NAV: Re-routing. 3 00:00:12,763 --> 00:00:16,163 Turn around where possible. Eh? 4 00:00:16,163 --> 00:00:19,763 Re-routing. OK... OK, look. 5 00:00:19,763 --> 00:00:21,043 Sure, let's re-route. 6 00:00:21,043 --> 00:00:24,563 In 200 metres, your destination is on your left. 7 00:00:24,563 --> 00:00:27,403 Oh! Where did those bollards come from? 8 00:00:27,403 --> 00:00:31,883 Re-routing. Oh, look at the state of that. Oh, my God. I'm in hell. 9 00:00:31,883 --> 00:00:33,403 I'm actually in hell. 10 00:00:33,403 --> 00:00:36,603 At the roundabout, take the second exit. 11 00:00:36,603 --> 00:00:40,083 I can't take the second exit any more. In 200 metres, 12 00:00:40,083 --> 00:00:42,243 go straight ahead. Since when was that a bus lane? 13 00:00:42,243 --> 00:00:44,403 HORN HONKING Yes! Sorry! 14 00:00:44,403 --> 00:00:45,563 MAN: You moron! 15 00:00:45,563 --> 00:00:48,163 I'm doing my be... I'm doing my best! 16 00:00:48,163 --> 00:00:50,643 Re-routing. Turn around where possible. 17 00:00:50,643 --> 00:00:52,563 Turn around where? Proceed to the route. 18 00:00:52,563 --> 00:00:54,403 Oh, you heartless machine. 19 00:00:54,403 --> 00:00:57,523 Re-routing. Robots are shit! You're a shit robot! 20 00:00:57,523 --> 00:01:01,483 Continue straight ahead for one mile to your destination. 21 00:01:03,043 --> 00:01:04,323 Bollards... 22 00:01:08,603 --> 00:01:10,043 BUZZING 23 00:01:10,043 --> 00:01:12,163 MAN OVER INTERCOM: Hello, this is the access team. 24 00:01:12,163 --> 00:01:13,923 Lausen Cleaners, I'm here for the statue. 25 00:01:13,923 --> 00:01:15,643 None of us are at our desks at the moment, 26 00:01:15,643 --> 00:01:18,123 but if you leave a message after the tone, we'll get back to you 27 00:01:18,123 --> 00:01:20,443 as soon as possible. Thank you. Hello? 28 00:01:20,443 --> 00:01:22,923 LINE GOES DEAD Doesn't work, that, la'. 29 00:01:22,923 --> 00:01:24,443 Might as well talk to a cup. 30 00:01:24,443 --> 00:01:26,683 Oh, right. Well, can you let me through, then? 31 00:01:26,683 --> 00:01:27,763 I'm here for the statue. 32 00:01:27,763 --> 00:01:29,043 Nah, mate, I'm sorry. 33 00:01:29,043 --> 00:01:31,323 Got an outside company now that deals with the access. 34 00:01:31,323 --> 00:01:32,883 Eh? Who do I talk to, then? 35 00:01:32,883 --> 00:01:34,603 I wouldn't know, my mate. 36 00:01:34,603 --> 00:01:36,923 See, the department that deals with the access company, 37 00:01:36,923 --> 00:01:38,723 they're not about that much. 38 00:01:38,723 --> 00:01:40,843 Based at home, mainly, you know. 39 00:01:40,843 --> 00:01:43,883 It's called...agile working. 40 00:01:43,883 --> 00:01:45,603 My God, the world's in a mess. 41 00:01:45,603 --> 00:01:47,163 HE CHUCKLES 42 00:01:49,923 --> 00:01:52,403 Oi! What do YOU do, then? 43 00:01:52,403 --> 00:01:54,603 You're not the first to ask that, la'. 44 00:01:54,603 --> 00:01:56,723 These days, I'm unsure myself. 45 00:01:56,723 --> 00:01:58,763 They say, "Do it, Vince," and I'll have a go. 46 00:01:59,883 --> 00:02:01,243 OK. 47 00:02:01,243 --> 00:02:02,963 Hiya! Whoa... Sorry. 48 00:02:02,963 --> 00:02:06,283 Council Officer Frankel, Pepper. You're with the council. 49 00:02:06,283 --> 00:02:08,803 Urban Redevelopment with culture brief, yes. 50 00:02:08,803 --> 00:02:11,163 And you are our valiant cleaner. 51 00:02:11,163 --> 00:02:13,243 I'm a crime scene cleaner, and your one-way system 52 00:02:13,243 --> 00:02:14,803 is bloody ridiculous. SHE SCOFFS 53 00:02:14,803 --> 00:02:17,363 I hardly think a £3 million-pedestrianisation 54 00:02:17,363 --> 00:02:20,163 re-routing system can be described as ridiculous. 55 00:02:20,163 --> 00:02:22,923 BOTH LAUGH It's rubbish. 56 00:02:22,923 --> 00:02:24,643 It's rubbish. 57 00:02:24,643 --> 00:02:28,363 Now, we are in a vehicle-free zone... 58 00:02:28,363 --> 00:02:31,283 It's only a 15-minute or so walk from here if we get a wriggle on. 59 00:02:31,283 --> 00:02:34,043 Eh? Can you not put these bollards down? 60 00:02:34,043 --> 00:02:36,643 I'll drive across the pedestrian area, it's a maintenance job. 61 00:02:36,643 --> 00:02:39,643 Ooh, no, that's the responsibility of the access team... Access team. 62 00:02:39,643 --> 00:02:42,443 ..and they follow an agile working system. They don't come to work, 63 00:02:42,443 --> 00:02:44,283 I've heard, yeah. Yes. 64 00:02:44,283 --> 00:02:47,563 Anyway, pop your van over there and let's get you off to the statue. 65 00:02:47,563 --> 00:02:49,123 Pop? Yes. 66 00:02:49,123 --> 00:02:50,443 Yeah. 67 00:02:55,043 --> 00:02:58,403 Are these shops all right? You're making people walk a very long way. 68 00:02:58,403 --> 00:03:00,123 It's just a period of adjustment. 69 00:03:00,123 --> 00:03:02,843 I like to think we've given the town a shot in the arm. 70 00:03:02,843 --> 00:03:06,083 Yeah? I like to think if I hold my stomach in when I talk to women, 71 00:03:06,083 --> 00:03:07,283 I look thin. 72 00:03:07,283 --> 00:03:10,363 The consensus is, people like a low-emission town centre. 73 00:03:11,603 --> 00:03:14,563 What people? There are no people. 74 00:03:14,563 --> 00:03:16,443 And what's he? A mirage? 75 00:03:16,443 --> 00:03:17,763 CHEERFULLY: Morning! 76 00:03:17,763 --> 00:03:20,563 How are we finding the pedestrianisation zone? 77 00:03:20,563 --> 00:03:22,643 You've ruined this town! 78 00:03:22,643 --> 00:03:25,603 SHE CHUCKLES So many characters around here. 79 00:03:25,603 --> 00:03:27,723 So, this new statue... 80 00:03:31,363 --> 00:03:34,323 ..given the feelings towards the previous incarnation of the statue, 81 00:03:34,323 --> 00:03:35,883 well, that was problematic, 82 00:03:35,883 --> 00:03:39,963 but once it was gone, there was a palpable sense of relief. 83 00:03:39,963 --> 00:03:43,323 Especially for me. I'd been lobbying for years to get rid of it. 84 00:03:43,323 --> 00:03:45,203 We've even had a focus group approved 85 00:03:45,203 --> 00:03:47,683 and a fully-budgeted alternative all lined up, 86 00:03:47,683 --> 00:03:50,523 and thankfully, everyone was thrilled with it. 87 00:03:50,523 --> 00:03:52,723 But then, out of the blue, this happens. 88 00:03:52,723 --> 00:03:55,163 Do you mean there was a statue and that statue was replaced 89 00:03:55,163 --> 00:03:57,043 and now someone's vandalised that statue? 90 00:03:57,043 --> 00:03:58,243 Yes. 91 00:03:58,243 --> 00:04:00,403 You use a lot of words. 92 00:04:00,403 --> 00:04:02,243 Your meetings must go on for ages. 93 00:04:02,243 --> 00:04:04,963 Hmm, well, I'm sorry if you find me a little verbose. 94 00:04:04,963 --> 00:04:07,963 Hey, well, we're all verbose sometimes, aren't we? 95 00:04:07,963 --> 00:04:10,483 Jesus Christ, I'm verbose as shit, myself. 96 00:04:12,203 --> 00:04:14,283 You don't know what verbose means, do you? 97 00:04:14,283 --> 00:04:15,723 No. 98 00:04:23,563 --> 00:04:24,963 And there it is. 99 00:04:29,843 --> 00:04:31,123 Oh, my God. 100 00:04:31,123 --> 00:04:32,603 Quite striking, isn't it? 101 00:04:32,603 --> 00:04:36,323 We wanted something that reflected a rich period in the town's history, 102 00:04:36,323 --> 00:04:37,883 so we did some research and then... 103 00:04:37,883 --> 00:04:39,363 Put a big bollock on a plinth. 104 00:04:40,883 --> 00:04:42,363 Put a what? 105 00:04:42,363 --> 00:04:43,923 A big bollock. 106 00:04:43,923 --> 00:04:45,923 A giant plum. A huge gonad. 107 00:04:45,923 --> 00:04:49,443 It's not a gonad. It's a sweet meat. 108 00:04:49,443 --> 00:04:51,163 A nut. A teabag. 109 00:04:51,163 --> 00:04:52,483 It's a knick-knack. A knacker. 110 00:04:52,483 --> 00:04:54,003 A love spud. 111 00:04:54,003 --> 00:04:55,403 It's a purple popper. 112 00:04:55,403 --> 00:04:56,603 It's a Jacob. 113 00:04:56,603 --> 00:04:58,923 I know one of grandfather's clock weights when I see it. 114 00:04:58,923 --> 00:05:00,843 I'm finding this quite triggering, actually. 115 00:05:00,843 --> 00:05:02,323 Who's triggered? I'm triggered. 116 00:05:02,323 --> 00:05:04,723 Hello. I'm Wicky. You've put a big testicle in your town. 117 00:05:04,723 --> 00:05:06,683 It's...a chickpea. 118 00:05:08,603 --> 00:05:10,763 Is it? Yes! 119 00:05:10,763 --> 00:05:14,203 Why? Because the town used to import chickpeas. 120 00:05:14,203 --> 00:05:16,003 I've been coming to this town for years. 121 00:05:16,003 --> 00:05:17,723 No-one's ever mentioned chickpeas. 122 00:05:17,723 --> 00:05:20,483 1856-1858. It was quite the hub. 123 00:05:22,003 --> 00:05:23,763 What's that on it? 124 00:05:23,763 --> 00:05:25,243 Goose blood, we think. 125 00:05:25,243 --> 00:05:27,603 Oh, God, is that part of council training these days, 126 00:05:27,603 --> 00:05:29,283 identifying bird blood? 127 00:05:29,283 --> 00:05:31,243 Is that what we're wasting taxpayers' money on? 128 00:05:31,243 --> 00:05:32,843 There's a goose beak down there. 129 00:05:32,843 --> 00:05:35,083 All right, Midsomer Murders, keep your clogs on. 130 00:05:35,083 --> 00:05:37,083 Can you clean it, or not? 131 00:05:37,083 --> 00:05:38,443 Of course I can. 132 00:05:38,443 --> 00:05:42,363 You will have a gleaming golden plum within the hour. 133 00:05:42,363 --> 00:05:44,883 Did you actually wink at me? 134 00:05:44,883 --> 00:05:46,963 Do you know what? As I did it, I thought, 135 00:05:46,963 --> 00:05:49,203 "I've misjudged my wink audience here." 136 00:05:49,203 --> 00:05:51,883 It's funny, isn't it? I winked at a lollipop lady earlier 137 00:05:51,883 --> 00:05:53,483 and she let me go before the kids. 138 00:05:53,483 --> 00:05:54,643 Cos some women... 139 00:05:54,643 --> 00:05:57,163 I am amazed you didn't wolf-whistle. At Jan? 140 00:05:57,163 --> 00:05:59,003 She's hearing impaired. There's no point. 141 00:05:59,003 --> 00:06:01,203 Shouldn't be in the job, really, to be honest with you. 142 00:06:01,203 --> 00:06:03,083 It's bloody dangerous. Right. Must go. 143 00:06:03,083 --> 00:06:05,563 I've got a planning subcommittee to attend. 144 00:06:05,563 --> 00:06:07,763 You going to put a big boob on the town hall steps? 145 00:06:07,763 --> 00:06:09,363 Pardon? Eh? 146 00:06:09,363 --> 00:06:10,763 Oh, nothing. 147 00:06:10,763 --> 00:06:13,123 You'd better get a wriggle on - it's miles away. 148 00:06:16,363 --> 00:06:17,763 CHEERFULLY: Morning! 149 00:06:31,643 --> 00:06:33,003 I've bloody chipped it. 150 00:06:33,003 --> 00:06:35,363 I'm glad you agree. It is a carbuncle. 151 00:06:35,363 --> 00:06:36,683 Hello. 152 00:06:36,683 --> 00:06:38,043 You're not a photographer. 153 00:06:38,043 --> 00:06:40,003 I'm not. And you're not a hurdler. 154 00:06:40,003 --> 00:06:41,123 What? 155 00:06:41,123 --> 00:06:42,683 Sorry, I thought it was a game. 156 00:06:42,683 --> 00:06:44,083 I'm here to clean. 157 00:06:44,083 --> 00:06:45,803 The public toilets are over there. 158 00:06:45,803 --> 00:06:47,043 Oh, fair warning. 159 00:06:47,043 --> 00:06:49,363 I defecated in each of the stalls myself, 160 00:06:49,363 --> 00:06:50,723 to make a point. 161 00:06:50,723 --> 00:06:53,243 God, you must be starving. 162 00:06:53,243 --> 00:06:54,523 I'm not here for the bogs. 163 00:06:54,523 --> 00:06:56,283 I'm here for the big, golden ball bag. 164 00:06:56,283 --> 00:06:59,443 Oh, no, no. No, no. This doesn't need cleaning. Move on. 165 00:06:59,443 --> 00:07:01,403 Eh? It's covered in blood. 166 00:07:01,403 --> 00:07:02,803 Yes, goose blood. 167 00:07:02,803 --> 00:07:05,283 Damn near three buckets of it. Walk on. 168 00:07:05,283 --> 00:07:08,763 Right. Well, this isn't a question I thought I'd be asking, 169 00:07:08,763 --> 00:07:10,563 but was it you that threw goose blood 170 00:07:10,563 --> 00:07:12,523 onto the big, bronze chickpea, madam? 171 00:07:14,243 --> 00:07:15,803 Maybe I did. 172 00:07:16,883 --> 00:07:18,363 Maybe I didn't. 173 00:07:22,523 --> 00:07:25,003 Is that goose blood on your tweed skirt? 174 00:07:25,003 --> 00:07:26,963 Perhaps. 175 00:07:26,963 --> 00:07:30,643 OK. I've got lots of questions jostling for position now, 176 00:07:30,643 --> 00:07:32,563 but the frontrunner is, why? 177 00:07:32,563 --> 00:07:34,963 Why would a woman want to take a stand about 178 00:07:34,963 --> 00:07:37,803 the demise of a previously thriving market town? 179 00:07:37,803 --> 00:07:42,323 Why would a lady seek to have a symbolic carbuncle removed 180 00:07:42,323 --> 00:07:45,803 from a place where she once ran free, as a child? 181 00:07:45,803 --> 00:07:47,883 It is a mystery, isn't it? 182 00:07:47,883 --> 00:07:50,123 In much the same way as why would an illiterate 183 00:07:50,123 --> 00:07:53,363 be sent to end a legitimate protest with his mop? 184 00:07:53,363 --> 00:07:56,043 HE GASPS Illiterate? 185 00:07:56,043 --> 00:07:58,763 I've just finished reading The Deathly Hallows. 186 00:07:58,763 --> 00:08:01,523 OK. Fun's over. Clean-up time. 187 00:08:01,523 --> 00:08:02,843 This is not fun! 188 00:08:02,843 --> 00:08:04,363 This is popular protest. 189 00:08:04,363 --> 00:08:06,123 I have a legal right to undertake it 190 00:08:06,123 --> 00:08:08,643 and until the local press arrive to document it, 191 00:08:08,643 --> 00:08:10,083 I will defend that right. 192 00:08:10,083 --> 00:08:13,203 You've got the time it takes me to finish mixing these chemicals, 193 00:08:13,203 --> 00:08:14,763 and then it is with great regret 194 00:08:14,763 --> 00:08:17,283 that I shall be cleaning this statue, regardless. 195 00:08:18,763 --> 00:08:21,803 I am playing darts in my local team tonight, 196 00:08:21,803 --> 00:08:25,563 and for some reason, none of those boys can hit a double ten. 197 00:08:25,563 --> 00:08:30,243 Some genetic abnormality of some kind, but that is where I come in. 198 00:08:30,243 --> 00:08:32,123 Because I never miss it. 199 00:08:32,123 --> 00:08:35,443 A game. A shot. In the mitch. 200 00:08:35,443 --> 00:08:36,963 To the Brummie bomber. 201 00:08:39,363 --> 00:08:40,883 Do you have a carer? 202 00:08:40,883 --> 00:08:43,963 PHONE VIBRATES Yeah, I do. And here he is. 203 00:08:45,763 --> 00:08:47,883 Yes, I'm there now. 204 00:08:47,883 --> 00:08:49,803 Well, there are complications. 205 00:08:49,803 --> 00:08:51,843 Not long, but I'm... I'm doing my best. 206 00:08:51,843 --> 00:08:53,483 AHEM! 207 00:08:55,403 --> 00:08:56,803 What are you doing? 208 00:08:56,803 --> 00:08:59,203 Believe in the power of popular protest, yet? 209 00:08:59,203 --> 00:09:02,163 I'm going to have to go back to the van now, it's bloody miles away! 210 00:09:02,163 --> 00:09:04,563 Down with this chickpea! Down with all chickpeas. 211 00:09:04,563 --> 00:09:06,563 The chickpea does not speak for us! 212 00:09:06,563 --> 00:09:08,803 Hey! Bloody right! 213 00:09:10,083 --> 00:09:12,243 This is going to make me pro-chickpea, if anything. 214 00:09:12,243 --> 00:09:13,603 I'm the chickpea! 215 00:09:13,603 --> 00:09:15,963 # We shall not We shall not be moved 216 00:09:15,963 --> 00:09:17,643 # We shall not... # Yeah, yeah. 217 00:09:17,643 --> 00:09:18,963 Don't worry, I'll get my stuff. 218 00:09:18,963 --> 00:09:21,003 # We shall not... # I'll go back to the van again. 219 00:09:21,003 --> 00:09:22,683 Yeah. I'll go back again, no problem! 220 00:09:22,683 --> 00:09:24,123 Jesus Christ! # We shall not 221 00:09:24,123 --> 00:09:25,283 # We shall not be moved 222 00:09:25,283 --> 00:09:27,323 # We shall... # I'm the chickpea! 223 00:09:27,323 --> 00:09:28,523 I'm the chickpea! 224 00:09:28,523 --> 00:09:31,243 # We shall not We shall not be moved. # 225 00:09:42,443 --> 00:09:43,963 What the..? 226 00:09:49,963 --> 00:09:51,963 HE GRUNTS 227 00:10:07,643 --> 00:10:12,083 Ooh, now, there is some suggestion that the supermarket 228 00:10:12,083 --> 00:10:14,683 we gave planning permission for 229 00:10:14,683 --> 00:10:17,843 has drawn trade away from the town centre, 230 00:10:17,843 --> 00:10:21,123 but I'm excited to hear your ideas for regeneration. 231 00:10:21,123 --> 00:10:23,803 Barbara. A vegan cheesemonger. 232 00:10:25,443 --> 00:10:28,683 Why not? Yes, I mean, that's just the sort of lateral thinking 233 00:10:28,683 --> 00:10:30,443 that'll get people coming back. 234 00:10:30,443 --> 00:10:31,603 KNOCKING 235 00:10:31,603 --> 00:10:34,083 Why don't we give free coffee to blue badge holders? 236 00:10:34,083 --> 00:10:36,123 Uh, well... Jackpot. 237 00:10:36,123 --> 00:10:37,883 Will you excuse me for a moment? 238 00:10:37,883 --> 00:10:39,083 Thank you. 239 00:10:42,963 --> 00:10:45,363 LOWERED VOICES: What are you doing? I need to speak to you. 240 00:10:45,363 --> 00:10:48,843 This is not the time or the place. I need to speak to you now. 241 00:10:48,843 --> 00:10:50,683 You can't just pull me out of a meeting. 242 00:10:50,683 --> 00:10:52,163 Your voice probably needs a rest. 243 00:10:52,163 --> 00:10:53,803 Someone's locked all my chemicals up. 244 00:10:53,803 --> 00:10:55,363 Yes, well, you left them unattended. 245 00:10:55,363 --> 00:10:57,563 The health and safety team have had to impound them. 246 00:10:57,563 --> 00:11:00,323 An infant may have consumed them. You told me to leave my van there. 247 00:11:00,323 --> 00:11:02,283 And where's this plague of infants coming from? 248 00:11:02,283 --> 00:11:05,003 Where's the health and safety team? They are centralised in Cardiff 249 00:11:05,003 --> 00:11:07,323 and our representatives are on a course this afternoon. 250 00:11:07,323 --> 00:11:10,003 You're not going to get your bloody chickpea cleaned, then are you? 251 00:11:10,003 --> 00:11:12,003 Some woman's poured away my remaining chemicals. 252 00:11:12,003 --> 00:11:14,163 Oh, God, I bet she has. I knew she'd be back. 253 00:11:14,163 --> 00:11:16,683 You know her? Now, you listen to me. 254 00:11:16,683 --> 00:11:19,403 How you clean that statue is your concern. 255 00:11:19,403 --> 00:11:21,643 But if it is not cleaned, your boss will lose 256 00:11:21,643 --> 00:11:23,563 a very lucrative council contract. 257 00:11:23,563 --> 00:11:27,123 Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go and speak too much in a meeting. 258 00:11:27,123 --> 00:11:28,803 Argh! 259 00:11:34,523 --> 00:11:36,523 All right, la'? How's it going? 260 00:11:36,523 --> 00:11:38,643 They've taken all my cleaning stuff, Vince. 261 00:11:38,643 --> 00:11:41,483 Health and safety team are all agile working this afternoon, kiddo. 262 00:11:41,483 --> 00:11:42,883 You'll have to contact Cardiff. 263 00:11:42,883 --> 00:11:45,483 I've got to get it done today. This place is insane! 264 00:11:45,483 --> 00:11:48,403 What you need is someone who's worked here so long... 265 00:11:49,923 --> 00:11:52,283 JANGLING ..got the keys to everything. 266 00:11:53,643 --> 00:11:56,163 See? I didn't mind the wink at all! 267 00:12:00,883 --> 00:12:02,643 There you go, kiddo. 268 00:12:02,643 --> 00:12:04,563 Jackpot. Thanks, mate. 269 00:12:08,323 --> 00:12:11,203 Ah. That's the old statue, is it? 270 00:12:11,203 --> 00:12:13,523 Oh, yeah, that's him. Old Ryce Dennison. 271 00:12:13,523 --> 00:12:15,523 Daft-looking fella. 272 00:12:15,523 --> 00:12:19,203 You know, when we was kids, we used to climb on top of him, 273 00:12:19,203 --> 00:12:21,603 pretend that we were all off to cause mayhem. 274 00:12:21,603 --> 00:12:22,683 WICKY CHUCKLES 275 00:12:22,683 --> 00:12:24,643 Which committee dragged him down, then? 276 00:12:24,643 --> 00:12:27,123 I don't know which one, but I know where they are. 277 00:12:27,123 --> 00:12:28,803 All at home in their pyjamas? 278 00:12:28,803 --> 00:12:32,363 Spot on, mate. HE CHUCKLES 279 00:12:32,363 --> 00:12:33,923 HE SIGHS 280 00:12:37,923 --> 00:12:40,923 For God's sake, where did you get the chain from? 281 00:12:40,923 --> 00:12:42,043 Britain! 282 00:12:42,043 --> 00:12:45,443 # Land of hope and glory 283 00:12:45,443 --> 00:12:48,283 # Mother of the free 284 00:12:48,283 --> 00:12:51,523 # We will always adore thee 285 00:12:51,523 --> 00:12:53,483 # Even though... # Look, this is starting to feel 286 00:12:53,483 --> 00:12:54,683 like one of my cheese dreams. 287 00:12:54,683 --> 00:12:57,763 I can't keep doing that walk. I'm very fat. 288 00:12:57,763 --> 00:13:00,483 Yes, I can see you're a product of the fast-food generation. 289 00:13:00,483 --> 00:13:04,123 Burgers, microwave pizzas, chicken nuggets, chicken... 290 00:13:04,123 --> 00:13:07,443 LAUGHING: You wouldn't know a Sussex Bantam if I threw one at you. 291 00:13:07,443 --> 00:13:09,963 Look, I can see why you might not like the chickpea... 292 00:13:09,963 --> 00:13:12,523 I DESPISE it. 293 00:13:12,523 --> 00:13:13,803 But then, I would. 294 00:13:13,803 --> 00:13:15,283 My name, sir, 295 00:13:15,283 --> 00:13:18,283 is Lucille Ryce Dennison. 296 00:13:18,283 --> 00:13:20,163 Ryce Dennison? 297 00:13:20,163 --> 00:13:21,403 Is that the... 298 00:13:21,403 --> 00:13:22,963 Is that the old statue? 299 00:13:22,963 --> 00:13:26,523 Colonel Sir William Arthur Balfour Ryce Dennison. 300 00:13:26,523 --> 00:13:29,723 And I, his great-great-great niece. 301 00:13:29,723 --> 00:13:31,563 Right. So that's why you're here. 302 00:13:31,563 --> 00:13:33,323 I've just seen him at the town hall. 303 00:13:33,323 --> 00:13:35,603 Fair play, he's a fine-looking fellow. 304 00:13:35,603 --> 00:13:37,923 A revered colonial governor. 305 00:13:37,923 --> 00:13:40,883 A man of impeccable breeding and a woefully-underrated 306 00:13:40,883 --> 00:13:42,683 watercolour landscape painter. 307 00:13:42,683 --> 00:13:45,723 Eh... Replaced by a chickpea! 308 00:13:45,723 --> 00:13:47,843 Look, you might have a point, but, come on, 309 00:13:47,843 --> 00:13:50,443 my boss is going to go mad if I don't complete the work order. 310 00:13:50,443 --> 00:13:52,963 Oh, only following orders, are we? 311 00:13:52,963 --> 00:13:54,483 Just like the Nazis. 312 00:13:54,483 --> 00:13:56,563 Bloody hell, we got there a bit quick, didn't we? 313 00:13:56,563 --> 00:13:59,963 Bet you would have loved to have buffed statues of the Fuhrer 314 00:13:59,963 --> 00:14:02,523 while the Wehrmacht goosestepped by. 315 00:14:02,523 --> 00:14:04,323 They liked to erase history, too! 316 00:14:04,323 --> 00:14:05,843 Look, can I just clean round you? 317 00:14:05,843 --> 00:14:07,123 Never! Never! 318 00:14:07,123 --> 00:14:09,163 Ow! Ow, never! 319 00:14:09,163 --> 00:14:12,123 Augh! Never! Oh, really? Yes, really. 320 00:14:12,123 --> 00:14:13,603 BOTH GRUNTING 321 00:14:15,643 --> 00:14:18,163 See, if I miss this darts match... Darts, ha-ha! 322 00:14:18,163 --> 00:14:20,923 An opiate to the masses, the man that once stood on this plinth. 323 00:14:20,923 --> 00:14:22,843 Put this town on the map! 324 00:14:22,843 --> 00:14:25,483 He who sang its name through the corridors of power, 325 00:14:25,483 --> 00:14:27,643 tossed it to the winds of the Americas, 326 00:14:27,643 --> 00:14:30,123 whispered to the waters of the East Indies. 327 00:14:30,123 --> 00:14:32,883 But now, they seek to pretend he didn't exist. 328 00:14:32,883 --> 00:14:36,003 # Land of hope and glory 329 00:14:36,003 --> 00:14:38,603 # Mother of the free 330 00:14:38,603 --> 00:14:42,203 # I will always adore thee... # 331 00:14:46,243 --> 00:14:47,723 KNOCKING 332 00:14:48,843 --> 00:14:50,803 What do you mean, she's chained herself to it? 333 00:14:50,803 --> 00:14:53,923 British chains, apparently. Ugh, bloody woman. 334 00:14:53,923 --> 00:14:56,363 Well, she's got a point. Oh, she's got a point, has she? 335 00:14:56,363 --> 00:14:58,003 And you share her precious point? 336 00:14:58,003 --> 00:15:00,163 Well, she's related to old whatshisname, isn't she? 337 00:15:00,163 --> 00:15:02,643 She's not going to be into a golden knacker. Ryce Dennison. 338 00:15:02,643 --> 00:15:04,123 Yes, the colonel himself. 339 00:15:04,123 --> 00:15:06,483 And she's told you ALL about him, no doubt. 340 00:15:06,483 --> 00:15:08,483 Yes. Very good at watercolours. 341 00:15:08,483 --> 00:15:11,203 Look, I know he looks a bit old-fashioned, 342 00:15:11,203 --> 00:15:14,163 but come on, he's better than a golden gland. 343 00:15:14,163 --> 00:15:15,803 SHE SCOFFS 344 00:15:15,803 --> 00:15:19,843 She told you about his use of slave labour, I presume? 345 00:15:19,843 --> 00:15:21,723 Sla..? Slaves? 346 00:15:21,723 --> 00:15:22,923 What did you say, slaves? 347 00:15:22,923 --> 00:15:26,723 Slave? Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, we don't say "slave". 348 00:15:26,723 --> 00:15:29,283 We say..."hello". Yes. 349 00:15:29,283 --> 00:15:31,123 She usually misses that bit out. 350 00:15:31,123 --> 00:15:34,363 Renowned benefactor who sat drinking port with his friends 351 00:15:34,363 --> 00:15:36,443 while a subjugated people did the work. 352 00:15:40,643 --> 00:15:42,243 There you go, mate. Thanks, Vince. 353 00:15:42,243 --> 00:15:44,403 Don't tell the maintenance team, whatever you do, 354 00:15:44,403 --> 00:15:46,763 when they get back from the health and safety conference. 355 00:15:46,763 --> 00:15:48,923 See, I'm not supposed to lend them out. 356 00:15:48,923 --> 00:15:51,523 So this woman, what's she protesting about? 357 00:15:53,443 --> 00:15:55,083 Who? Her? 358 00:15:55,083 --> 00:15:56,523 Protest? 359 00:15:56,523 --> 00:15:59,443 Oh, God, I don't know. You'd have to ask her. Don't ask me. 360 00:15:59,443 --> 00:16:01,563 Why are you asking me, Vince? I don't know. 361 00:16:01,563 --> 00:16:04,123 I can't stand around chatting to you. I've got to go. 362 00:16:04,123 --> 00:16:08,483 Yeah. Thanks. Thanks. Lovely. 363 00:16:08,483 --> 00:16:12,363 # Bring me my bow of burning gold 364 00:16:12,363 --> 00:16:15,683 # Bring me my arrows of desire 365 00:16:15,683 --> 00:16:16,963 # Bring... # 366 00:16:16,963 --> 00:16:19,003 What? What?! 367 00:16:20,083 --> 00:16:21,643 Ooh! 368 00:16:21,643 --> 00:16:23,523 Right. Move. 369 00:16:23,523 --> 00:16:25,403 New information has come to light 370 00:16:25,403 --> 00:16:27,203 and I'm about to buff a chickpea. 371 00:16:28,603 --> 00:16:31,083 Going to struggle to clean without your mop, aren't you? 372 00:16:31,083 --> 00:16:32,843 That is not a mop. 373 00:16:32,843 --> 00:16:36,083 That is a microfibre, polypropylene bisom. 374 00:16:36,083 --> 00:16:38,123 It's a piece of specialist equipment. 375 00:16:38,123 --> 00:16:39,283 And as a specialist... 376 00:16:40,683 --> 00:16:42,483 ..I always carry a spare. 377 00:16:43,963 --> 00:16:46,043 En garde! Augh! Ha-ha! 378 00:16:46,043 --> 00:16:48,483 GROWLING 379 00:16:48,483 --> 00:16:51,083 GRUNTING 380 00:16:52,363 --> 00:16:55,563 HE GROWLS, SHE CACKLES 381 00:16:57,603 --> 00:16:59,403 HE YELLS 382 00:17:00,763 --> 00:17:02,483 Ugh! Suck on that! 383 00:17:02,483 --> 00:17:03,843 Bloody hell. 384 00:17:03,843 --> 00:17:05,723 HE YELLS 385 00:17:08,603 --> 00:17:10,603 FAINT SCUFFLING 386 00:17:12,683 --> 00:17:14,723 Ugh! 387 00:17:17,483 --> 00:17:18,883 Yield! 388 00:17:22,243 --> 00:17:23,963 That's how we do it. 389 00:17:28,683 --> 00:17:32,083 Ridiculous. Can't a man do his job in peace? Nutter. 390 00:17:32,083 --> 00:17:33,963 What did you call me? 391 00:17:38,163 --> 00:17:40,523 One soapy bollock...coming up. 392 00:17:49,403 --> 00:17:50,883 Puh. 393 00:18:03,123 --> 00:18:05,403 Am I going to go bald? No. 394 00:18:05,403 --> 00:18:08,923 The acidity is much the same as household vinegar. 395 00:18:08,923 --> 00:18:11,923 If anything, you might see a bit more shine, 396 00:18:11,923 --> 00:18:13,323 a reduction in frizz. 397 00:18:13,323 --> 00:18:15,683 Really? I might try that at home. 398 00:18:15,683 --> 00:18:17,203 Cider vinegar's best. 399 00:18:18,603 --> 00:18:19,843 Apparently. 400 00:18:21,283 --> 00:18:24,243 Well, that got a bit out of hand, didn't it? 401 00:18:24,243 --> 00:18:26,963 In that you decided to have a fight with a woman, yes. 402 00:18:26,963 --> 00:18:30,203 Why are you so desperate to stop me? 403 00:18:30,203 --> 00:18:33,283 Look, I know you're proud of the colonel and everything 404 00:18:33,283 --> 00:18:36,203 and I don't really want to be the one to tell you, but... 405 00:18:36,203 --> 00:18:39,243 LOWERED VOICE: ..apparently he used slaves. 406 00:18:39,243 --> 00:18:41,003 He had what? 407 00:18:41,003 --> 00:18:42,683 He used slaves. 408 00:18:42,683 --> 00:18:44,363 You sound like you've had a stroke. 409 00:18:44,363 --> 00:18:46,323 Speak your mind, sir. He used slaves! 410 00:18:46,323 --> 00:18:47,923 We're all slaves! 411 00:18:47,923 --> 00:18:49,603 Mate, have you not got anything to do? 412 00:18:49,603 --> 00:18:51,363 Nope. Fair enough. 413 00:18:51,363 --> 00:18:54,323 So... And who didn't, in that era? 414 00:18:54,323 --> 00:18:57,203 All the ruling classes did. Yes, but it's wrong! 415 00:18:57,203 --> 00:19:00,643 It is, and I'm sure he wouldn't have done it if he were alive today. 416 00:19:00,643 --> 00:19:03,483 Hang on... Do you believe we can't have a statue of anyone 417 00:19:03,483 --> 00:19:05,603 who did things we didn't approve of today? 418 00:19:05,603 --> 00:19:08,683 Well... Let's get Winston Churchill pulled down, shall we? 419 00:19:08,683 --> 00:19:11,723 Oh, Gandhi had some pretty unhealthy views. 420 00:19:11,723 --> 00:19:14,163 Let's draft a letter to the Indian government, shall we? 421 00:19:14,163 --> 00:19:16,723 Yeah, I know, but... I hope you won't be watching Goldfinger 422 00:19:16,723 --> 00:19:18,083 on television this Christmas. 423 00:19:18,083 --> 00:19:20,643 Sean Connery said it was OK to slap a woman. 424 00:19:20,643 --> 00:19:22,003 You leave Bond out of it. 425 00:19:22,003 --> 00:19:24,763 Sorry, if you don't mind, sorry. 426 00:19:24,763 --> 00:19:27,323 I respect all women, madam. Thank you, sorry. 427 00:19:27,323 --> 00:19:29,683 Not quite as simple as you thought, is it? 428 00:19:29,683 --> 00:19:33,363 Look, I just want to go and play darts. 429 00:19:33,363 --> 00:19:35,603 The two Johnnies will go mad if I don't turn up. 430 00:19:35,603 --> 00:19:37,723 And who are the two Johnnies when they're at home? 431 00:19:37,723 --> 00:19:39,243 Oh, it's one bloke called Johnny, 432 00:19:39,243 --> 00:19:42,043 he's just had the same condom in his wallet since 1994. 433 00:19:42,043 --> 00:19:44,163 He's a bloody good darts captain, though, so... 434 00:19:47,523 --> 00:19:50,123 Look, can we compromise? 435 00:19:50,123 --> 00:19:54,243 I'll get the worst of it off, and then if your photographer turns up, 436 00:19:54,243 --> 00:19:57,203 I'll splash some stuff on it, make it look like there's been a protest. 437 00:20:03,803 --> 00:20:06,043 CLINKING 438 00:20:06,043 --> 00:20:08,003 What the..? Congratulations. 439 00:20:08,003 --> 00:20:11,123 You've just become part of a popular protest. 440 00:20:11,123 --> 00:20:13,963 Fancy a snack? How about a nice, little key? 441 00:20:13,963 --> 00:20:15,883 No, no, no, no, no, no, no... 442 00:20:15,883 --> 00:20:17,963 Mmm-mmm, yum, yum, yum. 443 00:20:17,963 --> 00:20:19,683 Oh, my God! 444 00:20:19,683 --> 00:20:21,963 # Land of hope and glory... # 445 00:20:21,963 --> 00:20:23,243 Enough! 446 00:20:26,443 --> 00:20:28,323 SIGHING 447 00:20:34,883 --> 00:20:36,723 You've just seen this in a film, haven't you? 448 00:20:36,723 --> 00:20:38,283 Yes, all right. 449 00:20:38,283 --> 00:20:40,283 Lucille, this has got to stop. 450 00:20:40,283 --> 00:20:43,883 Over my dead body, Council Officer Fran. 451 00:20:43,883 --> 00:20:45,523 So you two actually know each other? 452 00:20:45,523 --> 00:20:48,363 In so far as you can know a jingoistic dinosaur. 453 00:20:48,363 --> 00:20:50,163 Or a politically correct fool, 454 00:20:50,163 --> 00:20:54,283 who would rip the heart out of a town to avoid offending anyone. 455 00:20:54,283 --> 00:20:58,083 He ruined people's lives. Oh, yes, let's erase history, 456 00:20:58,083 --> 00:21:00,643 and replace it with utter meaningless tosh. 457 00:21:00,643 --> 00:21:04,123 Could you not put the colonel's statue in a museum? Oh, please! 458 00:21:04,123 --> 00:21:05,603 Like we haven't heard that before. 459 00:21:05,603 --> 00:21:08,043 No? It's in the way like a dirty secret. 460 00:21:08,043 --> 00:21:11,043 We need to educate, not deny. 461 00:21:11,043 --> 00:21:13,243 What about a little plaque at the bottom of the statue 462 00:21:13,243 --> 00:21:15,203 saying about all the bad stuff he did? Good idea. 463 00:21:15,203 --> 00:21:17,203 Yes, an apologetic little sign saying, 464 00:21:17,203 --> 00:21:19,203 "Sorry, we're celebrating a monster." 465 00:21:19,203 --> 00:21:21,003 You can't erase a town's history. 466 00:21:21,003 --> 00:21:24,003 People need to know from whence they came, good and bad. 467 00:21:24,003 --> 00:21:25,963 Oh, so you're the voice of the people now? 468 00:21:25,963 --> 00:21:27,483 Yes, I thought chucking blood 469 00:21:27,483 --> 00:21:29,843 at a statue was rather reminiscent of mob rule. 470 00:21:29,843 --> 00:21:34,483 And keeping the truth from the people smacks of a bloody dictator, 471 00:21:34,483 --> 00:21:36,963 Chairwoman Mao. Don't you "Chairwoman Mao" me, 472 00:21:36,963 --> 00:21:38,603 you one-woman gang of thugs. 473 00:21:38,603 --> 00:21:40,523 Did anyone ask people from the town? What? 474 00:21:40,523 --> 00:21:43,923 Did either of you think to ask the people who matter? 475 00:21:43,923 --> 00:21:45,603 Black people! 476 00:21:45,603 --> 00:21:47,483 Oh, good point! No! 477 00:21:47,483 --> 00:21:50,843 That's not what I meant! Ooh, yes, he has got a point. No! 478 00:21:50,843 --> 00:21:53,043 Who do we know? I don't know, um... 479 00:21:53,043 --> 00:21:55,043 Erm... Hmm... 480 00:21:55,043 --> 00:21:56,363 SHE GASPS Vince! 481 00:21:56,363 --> 00:21:57,603 Why don't we ask Vince? 482 00:21:57,603 --> 00:22:00,163 Why don't we? Good! No, that's not what I meant! 483 00:22:00,163 --> 00:22:02,363 Come along, come along... No... Come on, cleaner. 484 00:22:02,363 --> 00:22:04,443 Off you come. We can't do this! 485 00:22:04,443 --> 00:22:07,483 I'm sure he'll have an insight into a lineage of pain. 486 00:22:07,483 --> 00:22:09,323 And I'm sure he'll be intelligent enough 487 00:22:09,323 --> 00:22:11,563 to put it into historical perspective. 488 00:22:11,563 --> 00:22:14,683 For the last time, I don't think we should do this, ladies. Come on. 489 00:22:17,203 --> 00:22:20,843 This is insensitive. This is exploitation. 490 00:22:20,843 --> 00:22:22,843 And I've got a darts match! 491 00:22:22,843 --> 00:22:25,563 Oh, well done, Vince. 492 00:22:25,563 --> 00:22:27,243 So, what are youse on about? 493 00:22:27,243 --> 00:22:29,083 They're talking about the statues, Vince. 494 00:22:29,083 --> 00:22:31,083 The chickpea is meaningless. 495 00:22:31,083 --> 00:22:34,203 He'll want the town to celebrate its past, warts and all. 496 00:22:34,203 --> 00:22:36,123 Better to have a symbol of hate, then, is it? 497 00:22:36,123 --> 00:22:37,683 We are talking about the colonel? 498 00:22:37,683 --> 00:22:41,403 A flawed man, but a beautifully-made, historic statue. 499 00:22:41,403 --> 00:22:43,523 Made a good climbing frame, to be fair. 500 00:22:43,523 --> 00:22:46,883 Vince, why are you being so blase? 501 00:22:46,883 --> 00:22:49,283 Your heritage, the suffering... 502 00:22:49,283 --> 00:22:50,843 What are you on about? 503 00:22:50,843 --> 00:22:53,323 Vince, I'm sorry to have to break it to you, 504 00:22:53,323 --> 00:22:56,883 but the colonel was someone who utilised subjugated labour. 505 00:22:56,883 --> 00:22:59,163 As did all the ruling classes of the time. 506 00:22:59,163 --> 00:23:00,443 You what? 507 00:23:00,443 --> 00:23:02,563 He used slaves, Vince. 508 00:23:02,563 --> 00:23:04,643 Oh, yeah, I know about that. 509 00:23:04,643 --> 00:23:05,843 Wait, you do? 510 00:23:05,843 --> 00:23:08,003 Of course I do. Grew up here, didn't I? 511 00:23:08,003 --> 00:23:09,443 Then you'll have a view on it. 512 00:23:09,443 --> 00:23:11,763 You'll want the history of the town acknowledged 513 00:23:11,763 --> 00:23:13,203 and the aesthetic preserved. 514 00:23:13,203 --> 00:23:14,763 Or the shame removed. 515 00:23:14,763 --> 00:23:16,723 And why would I have such strong opinions? 516 00:23:18,283 --> 00:23:19,803 Well, b...because... 517 00:23:19,803 --> 00:23:22,963 You're... ..because...well... You're... 518 00:23:22,963 --> 00:23:24,163 Don't do this. 519 00:23:24,163 --> 00:23:26,483 BOTH: Because you're black. 520 00:23:26,483 --> 00:23:28,403 Oh, my God. 521 00:23:28,403 --> 00:23:29,883 You're right. 522 00:23:29,883 --> 00:23:31,763 I am! 523 00:23:31,763 --> 00:23:33,123 Oh! 524 00:23:34,843 --> 00:23:36,003 So? 525 00:23:36,003 --> 00:23:38,843 So? Should the statue have been pulled down or not? 526 00:23:38,843 --> 00:23:41,523 Yeah, I'm glad they got rid of the old git. 527 00:23:41,523 --> 00:23:43,003 Progress. 528 00:23:43,003 --> 00:23:44,723 Vince is a progressive, I knew it. 529 00:23:44,723 --> 00:23:46,443 I'll see you're on a mural for this, Vince. 530 00:23:46,443 --> 00:23:48,163 But you used to climb on the statue. 531 00:23:48,163 --> 00:23:49,643 It's part of your childhood. 532 00:23:49,643 --> 00:23:51,843 Yeah, we did. And me arl fella used to laugh. 533 00:23:51,843 --> 00:23:54,283 Go on, kids, that's it. 534 00:23:54,283 --> 00:23:56,803 "Let the old bastard carry you for a change." 535 00:23:56,803 --> 00:23:59,083 Didn't lobby to have it taken down, though? 536 00:23:59,083 --> 00:24:02,523 No. No-one knew it was even an option back then. 537 00:24:02,523 --> 00:24:05,443 I mean, me arl fella's glad he's gone. I'm glad he's gone. 538 00:24:05,443 --> 00:24:07,803 Thank you. But I don't think he should have been replaced 539 00:24:07,803 --> 00:24:09,843 by a bleeding chickpea. Thank you! 540 00:24:09,843 --> 00:24:11,523 130 grand, that thing cost. 541 00:24:11,523 --> 00:24:13,403 You what?! 542 00:24:13,403 --> 00:24:16,203 For a big, brass gonad? 543 00:24:16,203 --> 00:24:19,203 Sorry. Sorry, this is important. You carry on. 544 00:24:19,203 --> 00:24:21,323 I mean, it's pretty disgusting in this day and age, 545 00:24:21,323 --> 00:24:22,883 people struggling to make ends meet, 546 00:24:22,883 --> 00:24:24,883 that you waste money on something like that. 547 00:24:24,883 --> 00:24:27,123 I wouldn't mind, but the kids can't even climb on it. 548 00:24:27,123 --> 00:24:29,323 Vince, you haven't engaged with the debate. 549 00:24:29,323 --> 00:24:31,643 You weren't at any of the consultation meetings. 550 00:24:31,643 --> 00:24:34,123 I did send a petition. You didn't sign it. 551 00:24:34,123 --> 00:24:36,363 Now, listen to me, youse two. 552 00:24:36,363 --> 00:24:38,563 I have got to cut some poor kid out the railings, 553 00:24:38,563 --> 00:24:41,123 and then someone's broken down in the one-way lane, 554 00:24:41,123 --> 00:24:42,923 so I'll have to get the tow truck out. 555 00:24:42,923 --> 00:24:45,083 And THEN, on the fifth floor, 556 00:24:45,083 --> 00:24:46,723 one of those venetian blinds is stuck, 557 00:24:46,723 --> 00:24:49,523 and the woman's trying to show slides about river pollution, 558 00:24:49,523 --> 00:24:51,603 and THEN, it's the end of my shift, 559 00:24:51,603 --> 00:24:53,203 and I am hoping to make the tail end 560 00:24:53,203 --> 00:24:55,123 of my granddaughter's birthday party. 561 00:24:56,443 --> 00:24:59,843 Now, I am so grateful that youse two have given me permission to protest, 562 00:24:59,843 --> 00:25:02,683 but like my arl fella before me, I'm going to get on 563 00:25:02,683 --> 00:25:04,483 and leave youse to bicker, 564 00:25:04,483 --> 00:25:05,963 if it's all the same with you. 565 00:25:12,363 --> 00:25:15,283 I know someone who'd have made that chickpea for 300 quid. 566 00:25:17,043 --> 00:25:19,083 Anyway... Shame on you both. 567 00:26:07,483 --> 00:26:09,083 What's going on? 568 00:26:09,083 --> 00:26:10,723 This is coming down. 569 00:26:10,723 --> 00:26:13,363 Eh? I've only just finished cleaning it. 570 00:26:13,363 --> 00:26:14,883 It's getting melted down. 571 00:26:14,883 --> 00:26:16,643 Offensive, apparently. 572 00:26:16,643 --> 00:26:18,803 Mind you, this can't be it. 573 00:26:18,803 --> 00:26:22,123 This is a statue of some colonel, it says here. 574 00:26:22,123 --> 00:26:24,563 This looks like a massive... A bollock? 575 00:26:24,563 --> 00:26:27,003 Yeah. Yeah, it's the colonel's bollock. 576 00:26:27,003 --> 00:26:29,483 You got the right statue. 577 00:26:29,483 --> 00:26:32,843 Yeah, I should check. No, no, you're all right. I'm with the council. 578 00:26:32,843 --> 00:26:34,323 Not seen you about before. 579 00:26:34,323 --> 00:26:36,323 No, I'm an agile worker. 580 00:26:36,323 --> 00:26:37,803 I'm normally at home. 581 00:26:40,803 --> 00:26:43,243 MUSIC: Itchycoo Park by Small Faces 582 00:26:47,643 --> 00:26:50,643 # Over bridge of sighs 583 00:26:50,643 --> 00:26:53,923 # To rest my eyes in shades of green... # 584 00:26:53,923 --> 00:26:55,523 All right, Vince? Oh, hello. 585 00:26:55,523 --> 00:26:56,963 Just getting off. Yeah, listen, 586 00:26:56,963 --> 00:26:59,003 I thought I'd give you a lift to your party. 587 00:26:59,003 --> 00:27:01,683 I... I've had an idea. 588 00:27:01,683 --> 00:27:03,683 # What did you do there? 589 00:27:03,683 --> 00:27:05,563 # I got high 590 00:27:05,563 --> 00:27:07,323 # What did you feel there? 591 00:27:07,323 --> 00:27:09,483 # Well, I cried 592 00:27:09,483 --> 00:27:11,163 # But, why the tears there? 593 00:27:11,163 --> 00:27:13,603 # Tell you why 594 00:27:13,603 --> 00:27:17,483 # It's all too beautiful... # PLAYFUL SCREAMING 595 00:27:17,483 --> 00:27:21,283 # It's all too beautiful 596 00:27:21,283 --> 00:27:28,123 # It's all too beautiful It's all too beautiful 597 00:27:30,403 --> 00:27:31,843 # Ha 598 00:27:34,283 --> 00:27:36,723 # It's all too beautiful 599 00:27:36,723 --> 00:27:37,883 # Beautiful 600 00:27:37,883 --> 00:27:40,763 # It's all too beautiful 601 00:27:40,763 --> 00:27:42,163 # Beautiful 602 00:27:42,163 --> 00:27:44,603 # It's all too beautiful 603 00:27:44,603 --> 00:27:45,843 # Beautiful 604 00:27:45,843 --> 00:27:48,163 # It's all too beautiful 605 00:27:48,163 --> 00:27:49,363 # Beautiful 606 00:27:51,003 --> 00:27:52,283 # Ha 607 00:27:54,963 --> 00:27:57,763 # It's all too beautiful 608 00:27:57,763 --> 00:27:59,043 # Beautiful 609 00:27:59,043 --> 00:28:02,363 # It's all too beautiful Beautiful. #