(energetic music)
- [Elizabeth] You won't wanna miss what we've got in store.
We have elated emus, beloved bunnies, pecking pigeons,
gifted goats, headpiece hens, and a donkey that sings opera.
All this and more right here on "World's Funniest Animals."
Hello and welcome to "World's Funniest Animals,"
the one-stop shop for all of your funny animal needs.
I'm your host, Elizabeth Stanton,
joined today by my partners in crime, Hank and Ruby.
As well as our amazing panel, Anna, Carmen,
Devon, and Daniel.
Whether it's something to chase, something to bury,
or something to chew, animals all enjoy their toy time.
(upbeat music)
- [Devon] This toy store has got a real salesman here.
He makes this toy look like it's so easy.
When I get home with it,
I may never get it to do what he can.
But he's got me, I guess I'll take it.
(audience laughs)
(lively music)
(audience laughs)
- [Daniel] Ooh, the dog's thinking,
"Somebody help, this poor fish
has fallen out of the aquarium.
Somebody help, get 'em back in the water!"
(audience laughs)
(energetic music)
- [Anna] "Wait, so you got the cat a toy
that looks and acts just like me.
You don't see a problem with that?"
(audience laughs)
(upbeat music)
(audience laughs)
- Oh yeah, that's obviously the original prototype
of the Roomba, and fortunately,
it's come a long way since then.
(audience laughs)
(mysterious music)
(audience laughs)
- No, poor little wean, he needs a bigger bed
so he can bring his favorite toy, this isn't fair!
(mysterious music continues) (audience laughs)
- [Daniel] Here's a look at the rigorous training
for the best of the best.
The US Army's top secret weapon,
the elite Attack Chipmunk Corps.
(dramatic music)
(audience laughs)
They know no fear.
(audience laughs)
- When these animals bond, they go against the grain,
break the mold,
and set a shining example for the rest of us.
Here's Opposites Attract.
(funky music)
- [Anna] "Okay guys, it's the annual top-three pet meeting.
Cat, can you stop staring at bird like that?
We have to be united, otherwise, pigs, goats,
and hamsters are going to start to take our spots."
(audience laughs)
(happy music)
(audience laughs)
- [Carmen] "Okay, we can be friends, under one condition:
I get your favorite toy."
(audience laughs)
(lively music)
(audience laughs)
- [Daniel] The cat's saying, "Oh yeah, I'm awesome,
look what I can do."
Chicken's saying, "Really, if you so awesome,
let's see you lay an egg."
(audience laughs)
(energetic music)
(audience laughs)
- [Anna] It is like going to the hairdresser
and they don't turn you around to the mirror
until they're finished.
Except this cat is going the extra mile
and covering the dog's eyes.
(audience laughs)
(pensive music)
(audience laughs)
- [Devon] Sure, they're friends now.
Something tells me when that ice thaws
it's not gonna be as adorable.
(audience laughs)
(quirky music)
- [Daniel] It's not like it used to be on the farm.
These days, mama goats are so busy with their careers
they have to find nannies wherever they can to help out.
(audience laughs)
- Favorite animal clips? We all have them.
Take a look at some of mine.
(upbeat music)
(audience laughs)
"Okay, that's my roll in the snow.
Now back into the sauna."
(fast electronic music)
(audience laughs)
Turtle always slower than the hare? Not anymore.
"I'm done with that 'always the loser' thing.
I'm ready to kick some bunny butt."
(audience laughs)
(lively music)
(audience laughs)
With the Winter Olympics not far away,
this dog is training hard for the curling event.
(audience laughs)
His training facility is a little limited
but I still think he's doing great.
(audience laughs)
(music)
(audience laughs)
This may look like a cat playing patty-cake
with its owner, but in reality,
this cat is a serious mixed martial artist
practicing a feline version of Chinese martial arts,
known as Pushing Paws.
(audience laughs)
(funky music)
(audience laughs) That healthy guy
on TV says, "Everyone needs to drink
at least 64 ounces of water a day."
"That's really hard, I've been here
for over an hour and I'm still only halfway there."
(audience laughs)
(upbeat music)
"Hey, buddy, hey!
How do you hang upside down like that?
What's your secret?
I tried that a few times
and now I'm down to just six lives."
(audience laughs)
(happy music)
Most cats do not like baths,
but there's one thing they just can't resist: bubbles.
(audience laughs)
Adorable doesn't even begin to describe
some of the next segment's clips,
Just Too Cute coming up next on "World's Funniest Animals."
(audience laughs)
Welcome back to "World's Funniest Animals."
Pets can display a whole range of actions and emotions,
but the animals and our next segment are Simply Silly.
(eerie music) - [Daniel] Hey, there's a new
sci-fi thriller out.
Here's the story.
A glowing, cylindrical object lands on Earth.
Actually, it flies through an open window into a home,
and of course it terrorizes the household.
Sounds really scary, I gotta see it.
(quirky music)
(audience laughs)
- Ah, fat cat bankers playing with our money
cartoons warned me about.
(audience laughs)
(trepidatious music)
(audience laughs)
- [Daniel] "Ha ha, this is really gonna confuse
that stupid beaver.
He'll be like, "Where's that branch?
How can I lose a giant branch? I must totally be losing it."
(audience laughs)
(quirky music)
(audience laughs)
- Hey, fun fact, me and my sister used to play this game,
and one time I ended up getting stitches
'cause I fell out of the cupboard.
(audience laughs)
(lively music)
(audience laughs)
- [Daniel] And here's another very early
iteration of the Roomba.
Actually, I bought one of those back then and sit back.
(audience laughs)
- [Female Speaker] When are you gonna let me?
- Clips don't get much more adorable
than the ones in this next segment.
Here's Just Too Cute.
(French music)
(audience laughs)
- [Anna] "I think we should make this a normal thing.
I don't want a dessert menu, I want a dog menu."
(audience laughs)
(energetic music)
(audience laughs)
- Aw, it's a nervous habit they never grew out of.
They're camera shy. (audience laughs)
(upbeat music)
(audience laughs)
- [Daniel] Humans like to sleep on pillows
filled with feathers.
Looks like donkeys prefer pillows made of people.
(audience laughs)
(quirky music)
(audience laughs)
- [Anna] I mean, who doesn't love a great day at the spa?
This one is clearly thrilled.
(audience laughs)
(whimsical music)
- [Daniel] Aw, isn't he just the sweetest?
Well, if he wiped out all the lettuce
you worked so hard to plant in your garden,
you may not think so.
But he's too adorable to stay mad at.
- [Elizabeth] The over-the-top lives of pampered pets,
coming up next on "World's Funniest Animals."
(audience laughs)
(upbeat music)
Welcome back to ""World's Funniest Animals."
Some owners go all out
and give their pets the royal treatment.
Let's dive into Pampered Pets.
(lively music)
(audience laughs)
- [Daniel] Thankfully, the world is a lot friendlier
for animals in the 21st century.
It wasn't too long ago that,
instead of feeding this furry fella,
this woman would be wearing it.
(audience laughs)
(dog barks)
- [Devon] No, you can't go to the dog park
for the third time today.
(dog barks)
Why? Because that's crazy.
(dog barks) (audience laughs)
I don't care if you didn't see Larry,
it's probably because Larry's owner
isn't as manipulated by his pet like I am.
(audience laughs) (dog barks)
Hey, you don't need to talk to me like that.
(dog whines) You know what? Fine.
Get ready, let's go.
(audience laughs)
(relaxing music)
- [Daniel] "Well yes, Philippe, I only have time
for a quick cut and a blow dry today.
Then I have to rush off to my therapist."
(audience laughs)
(happy music)
- Okay, so I've heard of lap dogs,
but apparently now we have shoulder cats.
Okay, I can get down with that, slap one on me.
(audience laughs)
(electronic music)
(audience laughs)
- [Daniel] The Real House Dogs of Beverly Hills.
Do they ever do anything besides get their nails done?
(audience laughs)
- There is no better way to get an animal to behave
than to learn their likes and dislikes,
and to know how they're going to react before they do.
Here's Anticipating Animals.
(electronic dance music)
- [Anna] "Hey, I locked myself out.
Any chance you can let me back in, please?"
(synthesized music)
(happy ukelele music)
(audience laughs)
"Well hi there, welcome to Good Boys.
How can we help you?
Hello?"
(audience laughs)
- [Female Speaker] No, not yet, buddy. (laughs)
There you go.
- [Daniel] You know, it used to be that a goat
could get anything he wanted for free,
just for being on the farm.
(audience laughs)
- [Female Speaker] You are so smart, goat!
- Now they charge for everything, even food.
(audience laughs)
(dramatic music)
- [Anna] This cat is so ready to scare its owner.
Bam! The tables turn.
(audience laughs)
(lively music)
- [Male Speaker] Hey boy, you wanna go for a walk?
(audience laughs)
- [Devon] What's the human equivalent to this?
"Do you wanna go to brunch?
Do you wanna go to brunch and then go shopping
for dish soap, but then spend $700 by accident
on other fun things you find at the store?"
(audience laughs)
(lively music)
- [Anna] "So are we just going to keep
letting this happen, Mom?
Yeah? Okay, great."
- [Elizabeth] We escape the city life
and venture out into the countryside.
Down on the Farm coming up next
on the "World's Funniest Animals."
(upbeat music)
Welcome back to ""World's Funniest Animals."
I can't wait to show you these next two segments.
It's not always about the city.
If you wanna find the true poles of the pet populace
you have to search Down on the Farm.
(funky music)
- [Daniel] "When you're on the run all day like I am,
your muscles get sore.
These percussion massages are really great
to get at those trigger points."
(audience laughs)
"But you need someone who knows how to use them.
This guy's great. Oh yeah, that's the spot.
Oh, you got it. Oh, wow, he's a real pro."
(audience laughs)
(electronic dance music)
- [Devon] This is bringing me back
to the trauma of school picture day.
How do I smile again?
(audience laughs) (camera clicks)
Oh, and the photo's taken. Great.
(camera clicks) (audience laughs)
(acoustic guitar)
(audience laughs)
- [Female Speaker] You have a kitty?
- Wow, to compete on the track these days,
looks like the jockeys are really getting smaller.
(audience laughs)
(upbeat music)
(audience laughs)
(happy music)
- Ah, the latest in spring fashion.
(audience laughs)
(high-pitch braying)
(relaxing music)
(audience laughs)
(high-pitch braying)
- Remember, in a barnyard opera,
it ain't over till the fat donkey sings.
(high-pitch vibrato braying)
(audience laughs)
(upbeat music)
(cat meows) (cow snorts)
- This cow acts just like my friends when I introduced 'em
to someone new.
I'm like, "No, no, no, it's okay,
you'll like them, I swear, I know you will."
(electronic dance music)
(audience laughs)
- Like they always say,
an emu is just a big dog with feathers.
(audience laughs)
- We love our pets, but sometimes their endless need
for attention can interfere with getting things done.
Here's Stop What You're Doing.
(mellow music)
(audience laughs)
- [Daniel] Humans are not very smart.
The woman thinks the cat just wants a scratch,
when he's actually trying to tell her the house is on fire.
(audience laughs)
(lively music)
- I think our pets are realizing
what's taking all their attention from them,
and they are starting a slow and silent rebellion.
(audience laughs)
(upbeat music)
(audience laughs)
- Besides smoke alarms, building codes may soon
require these new safety devices,
which alert you if your cat was hiding in the closet
when you shut the door.
(loud vibration) (audience laughs)
(electronic dance music)
- [Carmen] "Hey, hey, you, please stop eating.
Please pay attention to me,
I'm literally begging, hello?"
(audience laughs)
(dog barks)
(audience laughs)
- [Daniel] "Is this guy totally deaf or what?
Hey, you are sitting on my tail!
Now get up!"
(dog barks) (audience laughs)
(energetic music)
(audience laughs)
In a head-to-head competition, dog against human.
It boils down to a serious war of wills
but the results are quite predictable.
(audience laughs)
The dog will usually come out on top.
(audience laughs)
- Well, that's almost it for us,
but in case you missed anything along the way,
here's a quick recap of all of our funniest moments.
We had Roomba reptiles, caressing cats, puzzled pooches,
short-order Shibas, amusing alpacas, feasting ferrets,
and a donkey that enjoys pillows made of people.
Whew!
(upbeat music)
(audience laughs) Thanks so much to our panel.
Bye guys, and thank you for tuning in.
I'm Elizabeth Stanton,
we'll see you next time on ""World's Funniest Animals."