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00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:02,235
(energetic music)

2
00:00:02,268 --> 00:00:04,671
- [Elizabeth] You won't wanna
miss what we've got in store.

3
00:00:04,704 --> 00:00:09,075
We have elated emus, beloved
bunnies, pecking pigeons,

4
00:00:09,109 --> 00:00:14,180
gifted goats, headpiece hens,
and a donkey that sings opera.

5
00:00:14,514 --> 00:00:18,385
All this and more right here
on "World's Funniest Animals."

6
00:00:19,652 --> 00:00:21,921
Hello and welcome to
"World's Funniest Animals,"

7
00:00:21,955 --> 00:00:25,458
the one-stop shop for all
of your funny animal needs.

8
00:00:25,492 --> 00:00:27,260
I'm your host,
Elizabeth Stanton,

9
00:00:27,293 --> 00:00:30,597
joined today by my partners
in crime, Hank and Ruby.

10
00:00:30,630 --> 00:00:33,533
As well as our amazing
panel, Anna, Carmen,

11
00:00:33,566 --> 00:00:35,502
Devon, and Daniel.

12
00:00:35,535 --> 00:00:38,838
Whether it's something to
chase, something to bury,

13
00:00:38,872 --> 00:00:43,076
or something to chew, animals
all enjoy their toy time.

14
00:00:44,177 --> 00:00:46,746
(upbeat music)

15
00:00:49,616 --> 00:00:53,153
- [Devon] This toy store has
got a real salesman here.

16
00:00:53,186 --> 00:00:56,723
He makes this toy look
like it's so easy.

17
00:00:56,756 --> 00:00:58,024
When I get home with it,

18
00:00:58,058 --> 00:01:00,393
I may never get it
to do what he can.

19
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But he's got me, I
guess I'll take it.

20
00:01:03,763 --> 00:01:06,599
(audience laughs)

21
00:01:06,633 --> 00:01:09,269
(lively music)

22
00:01:10,870 --> 00:01:13,773
(audience laughs)

23
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- [Daniel] Ooh,
the dog's thinking,

24
00:01:18,445 --> 00:01:20,346
"Somebody help, this poor fish

25
00:01:20,380 --> 00:01:22,148
has fallen out of the aquarium.

26
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Somebody help, get 'em
back in the water!"

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(audience laughs)

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(energetic music)

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- [Anna] "Wait, so
you got the cat a toy

30
00:01:36,429 --> 00:01:38,665
that looks and
acts just like me.

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You don't see a
problem with that?"

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00:01:42,335 --> 00:01:45,138
(audience laughs)

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00:01:45,171 --> 00:01:47,340
(upbeat music)

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00:01:47,373 --> 00:01:50,743
(audience laughs)

35
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- Oh yeah, that's obviously
the original prototype

36
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of the Roomba, and fortunately,

37
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it's come a long way since then.

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(audience laughs)

39
00:02:03,223 --> 00:02:06,226
(mysterious music)

40
00:02:08,561 --> 00:02:11,397
(audience laughs)

41
00:02:11,431 --> 00:02:14,267
- No, poor little wean,
he needs a bigger bed

42
00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:17,303
so he can bring his favorite
toy, this isn't fair!

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00:02:17,337 --> 00:02:20,707
(mysterious music
continues) (audience laughs)

44
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- [Daniel] Here's a look
at the rigorous training

45
00:02:22,408 --> 00:02:24,344
for the best of the best.

46
00:02:24,377 --> 00:02:26,813
The US Army's top secret weapon,

47
00:02:26,846 --> 00:02:28,882
the elite Attack Chipmunk Corps.

48
00:02:28,915 --> 00:02:30,550
(dramatic music)

49
00:02:30,583 --> 00:02:31,918
(audience laughs)

50
00:02:31,951 --> 00:02:33,786
They know no fear.

51
00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:35,321
(audience laughs)

52
00:02:35,355 --> 00:02:38,291
- When these animals bond,
they go against the grain,

53
00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:39,726
break the mold,

54
00:02:39,759 --> 00:02:42,262
and set a shining example
for the rest of us.

55
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Here's Opposites Attract.

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00:02:44,531 --> 00:02:47,000
(funky music)

57
00:02:47,033 --> 00:02:50,036
- [Anna] "Okay guys, it's the
annual top-three pet meeting.

58
00:02:50,069 --> 00:02:52,605
Cat, can you stop staring
at bird like that?

59
00:02:52,639 --> 00:02:55,074
We have to be united,
otherwise, pigs, goats,

60
00:02:55,108 --> 00:02:57,877
and hamsters are going to
start to take our spots."

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00:02:59,078 --> 00:03:01,781
(audience laughs)

62
00:03:01,814 --> 00:03:04,384
(happy music)

63
00:03:05,251 --> 00:03:07,153
(audience laughs)

64
00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:10,823
- [Carmen] "Okay, we can be
friends, under one condition:

65
00:03:10,857 --> 00:03:12,825
I get your favorite toy."

66
00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:14,928
(audience laughs)

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00:03:14,961 --> 00:03:18,264
(lively music)

68
00:03:18,298 --> 00:03:20,133
(audience laughs)

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00:03:20,166 --> 00:03:22,535
- [Daniel] The cat's saying,
"Oh yeah, I'm awesome,

70
00:03:22,569 --> 00:03:24,270
look what I can do."

71
00:03:24,304 --> 00:03:26,873
Chicken's saying, "Really,
if you so awesome,

72
00:03:26,906 --> 00:03:28,408
let's see you lay an egg."

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00:03:29,776 --> 00:03:32,679
(audience laughs)

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00:03:35,081 --> 00:03:37,784
(energetic music)

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00:03:37,817 --> 00:03:40,587
(audience laughs)

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00:03:40,620 --> 00:03:41,788
- [Anna] It is like
going to the hairdresser

77
00:03:41,821 --> 00:03:43,523
and they don't turn you
around to the mirror

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00:03:43,556 --> 00:03:44,757
until they're finished.

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Except this cat is
going the extra mile

80
00:03:47,193 --> 00:03:49,629
and covering the dog's eyes.

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00:03:49,662 --> 00:03:53,099
(audience laughs)

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00:03:53,132 --> 00:03:55,868
(pensive music)

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00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:58,705
(audience laughs)

84
00:04:00,873 --> 00:04:02,742
- [Devon] Sure,
they're friends now.

85
00:04:02,775 --> 00:04:04,544
Something tells me
when that ice thaws

86
00:04:04,577 --> 00:04:06,879
it's not gonna be as adorable.

87
00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:09,816
(audience laughs)

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00:04:10,650 --> 00:04:12,118
(quirky music)

89
00:04:12,151 --> 00:04:13,653
- [Daniel] It's not like
it used to be on the farm.

90
00:04:13,686 --> 00:04:16,422
These days, mama goats are
so busy with their careers

91
00:04:16,456 --> 00:04:19,392
they have to find nannies
wherever they can to help out.

92
00:04:20,293 --> 00:04:23,196
(audience laughs)

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00:04:24,664 --> 00:04:27,400
- Favorite animal
clips? We all have them.

94
00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:29,569
Take a look at some of mine.

95
00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:32,805
(upbeat music)

96
00:04:32,839 --> 00:04:35,742
(audience laughs)

97
00:04:39,045 --> 00:04:41,848
"Okay, that's my
roll in the snow.

98
00:04:41,881 --> 00:04:43,750
Now back into the sauna."

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00:04:44,984 --> 00:04:48,655
(fast electronic music)

100
00:04:48,688 --> 00:04:51,591
(audience laughs)

101
00:04:52,925 --> 00:04:55,528
Turtle always slower than
the hare? Not anymore.

102
00:04:55,561 --> 00:04:58,564
"I'm done with that
'always the loser' thing.

103
00:04:58,598 --> 00:05:01,200
I'm ready to kick
some bunny butt."

104
00:05:01,234 --> 00:05:04,103
(audience laughs)

105
00:05:05,204 --> 00:05:07,840
(lively music)

106
00:05:09,175 --> 00:05:11,210
(audience laughs)

107
00:05:11,244 --> 00:05:13,913
With the Winter
Olympics not far away,

108
00:05:13,946 --> 00:05:17,083
this dog is training hard
for the curling event.

109
00:05:17,950 --> 00:05:19,185
(audience laughs)

110
00:05:19,218 --> 00:05:21,688
His training facility
is a little limited

111
00:05:21,721 --> 00:05:24,023
but I still think
he's doing great.

112
00:05:28,461 --> 00:05:31,364
(audience laughs)

113
00:05:32,932 --> 00:05:35,468
(music)

114
00:05:35,501 --> 00:05:37,537
(audience laughs)

115
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This may look like a
cat playing patty-cake

116
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with its owner, but in reality,

117
00:05:41,741 --> 00:05:44,644
this cat is a serious
mixed martial artist

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00:05:44,677 --> 00:05:47,747
practicing a feline version
of Chinese martial arts,

119
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known as Pushing Paws.

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00:05:51,117 --> 00:05:54,020
(audience laughs)

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00:05:56,255 --> 00:05:58,825
(funky music)

122
00:06:04,764 --> 00:06:05,865
(audience laughs)
That healthy guy

123
00:06:05,898 --> 00:06:07,700
on TV says, "Everyone
needs to drink

124
00:06:07,734 --> 00:06:10,203
at least 64 ounces
of water a day."

125
00:06:10,236 --> 00:06:11,971
"That's really
hard, I've been here

126
00:06:12,004 --> 00:06:15,141
for over an hour and I'm
still only halfway there."

127
00:06:15,174 --> 00:06:17,443
(audience laughs)

128
00:06:17,477 --> 00:06:18,277
(upbeat music)

129
00:06:18,311 --> 00:06:20,079
"Hey, buddy, hey!

130
00:06:21,781 --> 00:06:23,750
How do you hang
upside down like that?

131
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What's your secret?

132
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I tried that a few times

133
00:06:28,254 --> 00:06:31,124
and now I'm down
to just six lives."

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00:06:31,157 --> 00:06:33,793
(audience laughs)

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00:06:33,826 --> 00:06:34,727
(happy music)

136
00:06:34,761 --> 00:06:36,829
Most cats do not like baths,

137
00:06:36,863 --> 00:06:40,900
but there's one thing they
just can't resist: bubbles.

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00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:44,437
(audience laughs)

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00:06:44,470 --> 00:06:47,874
(audience laughs)

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Adorable doesn't even
begin to describe

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some of the next
segment's clips,

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00:06:52,044 --> 00:06:55,448
Just Too Cute coming up next
on "World's Funniest Animals."

143
00:06:55,481 --> 00:06:58,484
(audience laughs)

144
00:07:05,024 --> 00:07:07,760
Welcome back to "World's
Funniest Animals."

145
00:07:07,794 --> 00:07:11,898
Pets can display a whole
range of actions and emotions,

146
00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:15,368
but the animals and our next
segment are Simply Silly.

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00:07:17,136 --> 00:07:18,037
(eerie music)
- [Daniel] Hey, there's a new

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00:07:18,070 --> 00:07:19,539
sci-fi thriller out.

149
00:07:19,572 --> 00:07:21,107
Here's the story.

150
00:07:21,140 --> 00:07:24,710
A glowing, cylindrical
object lands on Earth.

151
00:07:24,744 --> 00:07:28,247
Actually, it flies through
an open window into a home,

152
00:07:28,281 --> 00:07:32,051
and of course it
terrorizes the household.

153
00:07:32,084 --> 00:07:34,987
Sounds really scary,
I gotta see it.

154
00:07:36,055 --> 00:07:38,291
(quirky music)

155
00:07:38,324 --> 00:07:40,560
(audience laughs)

156
00:07:40,593 --> 00:07:44,030
- Ah, fat cat bankers
playing with our money

157
00:07:44,063 --> 00:07:46,165
cartoons warned me about.

158
00:07:46,199 --> 00:07:49,202
(audience laughs)

159
00:07:51,604 --> 00:07:54,807
(trepidatious music)

160
00:07:54,841 --> 00:07:56,375
(audience laughs)

161
00:07:56,409 --> 00:07:58,411
- [Daniel] "Ha ha, this
is really gonna confuse

162
00:07:58,444 --> 00:08:00,146
that stupid beaver.

163
00:08:00,179 --> 00:08:01,948
He'll be like,
"Where's that branch?

164
00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:05,918
How can I lose a giant branch?
I must totally be losing it."

165
00:08:05,952 --> 00:08:08,855
(audience laughs)

166
00:08:10,656 --> 00:08:13,326
(quirky music)

167
00:08:15,628 --> 00:08:18,531
(audience laughs)

168
00:08:19,866 --> 00:08:22,602
- Hey, fun fact, me and my
sister used to play this game,

169
00:08:22,635 --> 00:08:24,370
and one time I ended
up getting stitches

170
00:08:24,403 --> 00:08:26,072
'cause I fell out
of the cupboard.

171
00:08:26,105 --> 00:08:29,008
(audience laughs)

172
00:08:30,243 --> 00:08:32,879
(lively music)

173
00:08:33,779 --> 00:08:36,682
(audience laughs)

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00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:43,356
- [Daniel] And here's
another very early

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00:08:43,389 --> 00:08:45,191
iteration of the Roomba.

176
00:08:45,224 --> 00:08:48,060
Actually, I bought one of
those back then and sit back.

177
00:08:50,263 --> 00:08:53,266
(audience laughs)

178
00:08:54,634 --> 00:08:58,170
- [Female Speaker] When are
you gonna let me?

179
00:08:58,204 --> 00:09:00,039
- Clips don't get
much more adorable

180
00:09:00,072 --> 00:09:01,774
than the ones in
this next segment.

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00:09:01,807 --> 00:09:03,376
Here's Just Too Cute.

182
00:09:04,610 --> 00:09:07,914
(French music)

183
00:09:07,947 --> 00:09:09,515
(audience laughs)

184
00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:11,617
- [Anna] "I think we should
make this a normal thing.

185
00:09:11,651 --> 00:09:14,654
I don't want a dessert
menu, I want a dog menu."

186
00:09:14,687 --> 00:09:17,590
(audience laughs)

187
00:09:18,891 --> 00:09:21,027
(energetic music)

188
00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:22,528
(audience laughs)

189
00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:25,898
- Aw, it's a nervous habit
they never grew out of.

190
00:09:25,932 --> 00:09:29,268
They're camera shy.
(audience laughs)

191
00:09:32,838 --> 00:09:36,008
(upbeat music)

192
00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:38,945
(audience laughs)

193
00:09:40,513 --> 00:09:41,981
- [Daniel] Humans like
to sleep on pillows

194
00:09:42,014 --> 00:09:43,482
filled with feathers.

195
00:09:43,516 --> 00:09:45,885
Looks like donkeys prefer
pillows made of people.

196
00:09:46,719 --> 00:09:49,722
(audience laughs)

197
00:09:51,157 --> 00:09:54,327
(quirky music)

198
00:09:54,360 --> 00:09:55,861
(audience laughs)

199
00:09:55,895 --> 00:09:58,064
- [Anna] I mean, who doesn't
love a great day at the spa?

200
00:09:58,097 --> 00:10:00,066
This one is clearly thrilled.

201
00:10:01,734 --> 00:10:04,103
(audience laughs)

202
00:10:04,136 --> 00:10:05,338
(whimsical music)

203
00:10:05,371 --> 00:10:08,341
- [Daniel] Aw, isn't
he just the sweetest?

204
00:10:08,374 --> 00:10:10,676
Well, if he wiped
out all the lettuce

205
00:10:10,710 --> 00:10:13,512
you worked so hard to
plant in your garden,

206
00:10:13,546 --> 00:10:14,814
you may not think so.

207
00:10:15,848 --> 00:10:17,917
But he's too adorable
to stay mad at.

208
00:10:20,219 --> 00:10:22,888
- [Elizabeth] The over-the-top
lives of pampered pets,

209
00:10:22,922 --> 00:10:25,825
coming up next on "World's
Funniest Animals."

210
00:10:25,858 --> 00:10:28,828
(audience laughs)

211
00:10:32,965 --> 00:10:35,501
(upbeat music)

212
00:10:35,534 --> 00:10:37,570
Welcome back to ""World's
Funniest Animals."

213
00:10:37,603 --> 00:10:39,472
Some owners go all out

214
00:10:39,505 --> 00:10:41,974
and give their pets
the royal treatment.

215
00:10:42,008 --> 00:10:44,276
Let's dive into Pampered Pets.

216
00:10:47,246 --> 00:10:49,815
(lively music)

217
00:10:50,750 --> 00:10:52,284
(audience laughs)

218
00:10:52,318 --> 00:10:53,285
- [Daniel] Thankfully, the
world is a lot friendlier

219
00:10:53,319 --> 00:10:54,987
for animals in the 21st century.

220
00:10:55,021 --> 00:10:56,322
It wasn't too long ago that,

221
00:10:56,355 --> 00:10:58,391
instead of feeding
this furry fella,

222
00:10:58,424 --> 00:11:00,626
this woman would be wearing it.

223
00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:03,429
(audience laughs)

224
00:11:05,431 --> 00:11:07,033
(dog barks)

225
00:11:07,066 --> 00:11:09,035
- [Devon] No, you can't
go to the dog park

226
00:11:09,068 --> 00:11:11,037
for the third time today.

227
00:11:11,070 --> 00:11:11,971
(dog barks)

228
00:11:12,004 --> 00:11:15,207
Why? Because that's crazy.

229
00:11:15,241 --> 00:11:16,442
(dog barks) (audience laughs)

230
00:11:16,475 --> 00:11:18,144
I don't care if you
didn't see Larry,

231
00:11:18,177 --> 00:11:19,645
it's probably
because Larry's owner

232
00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:22,548
isn't as manipulated
by his pet like I am.

233
00:11:22,581 --> 00:11:23,816
(audience laughs)
(dog barks)

234
00:11:23,849 --> 00:11:25,951
Hey, you don't need to
talk to me like that.

235
00:11:25,985 --> 00:11:27,153
(dog whines)
You know what? Fine.

236
00:11:27,186 --> 00:11:28,287
Get ready, let's go.

237
00:11:29,922 --> 00:11:32,625
(audience laughs)

238
00:11:32,658 --> 00:11:35,361
(relaxing music)

239
00:11:35,394 --> 00:11:37,596
- [Daniel] "Well yes,
Philippe, I only have time

240
00:11:37,630 --> 00:11:39,865
for a quick cut and
a blow dry today.

241
00:11:39,899 --> 00:11:42,401
Then I have to rush
off to my therapist."

242
00:11:43,602 --> 00:11:45,171
(audience laughs)

243
00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:47,673
(happy music)

244
00:11:49,175 --> 00:11:50,743
- Okay, so I've
heard of lap dogs,

245
00:11:50,776 --> 00:11:52,978
but apparently now we
have shoulder cats.

246
00:11:53,012 --> 00:11:56,015
Okay, I can get down with
that, slap one on me.

247
00:11:58,150 --> 00:12:00,052
(audience laughs)

248
00:12:00,086 --> 00:12:02,888
(electronic music)

249
00:12:02,922 --> 00:12:04,356
(audience laughs)

250
00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:06,192
- [Daniel] The Real House
Dogs of Beverly Hills.

251
00:12:07,493 --> 00:12:10,162
Do they ever do anything
besides get their nails done?

252
00:12:10,196 --> 00:12:13,299
(audience laughs)

253
00:12:13,332 --> 00:12:16,235
- There is no better way
to get an animal to behave

254
00:12:16,268 --> 00:12:19,205
than to learn their
likes and dislikes,

255
00:12:19,238 --> 00:12:22,475
and to know how they're going
to react before they do.

256
00:12:22,508 --> 00:12:24,677
Here's Anticipating Animals.

257
00:12:27,113 --> 00:12:30,216
(electronic dance music)

258
00:12:30,249 --> 00:12:32,685
- [Anna] "Hey, I
locked myself out.

259
00:12:32,718 --> 00:12:35,755
Any chance you can let
me back in, please?"

260
00:12:35,788 --> 00:12:39,358
(synthesized music)

261
00:12:39,391 --> 00:12:41,127
(happy ukelele music)

262
00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:43,596
(audience laughs)

263
00:12:43,629 --> 00:12:44,964
"Well hi there,
welcome to Good Boys.

264
00:12:44,997 --> 00:12:46,065
How can we help you?

265
00:12:47,633 --> 00:12:48,934
Hello?"

266
00:12:48,968 --> 00:12:52,304
(audience laughs)

267
00:12:52,338 --> 00:12:54,273
- [Female Speaker] No,
not yet, buddy. (laughs)

268
00:12:54,306 --> 00:12:55,141
There you go.

269
00:12:56,342 --> 00:12:57,576
- [Daniel] You know, it
used to be that a goat

270
00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,078
could get anything
he wanted for free,

271
00:12:59,111 --> 00:13:00,312
just for being on the farm.

272
00:13:00,346 --> 00:13:01,480
(audience laughs)

273
00:13:01,514 --> 00:13:03,682
- [Female Speaker] You
are so smart, goat!

274
00:13:03,716 --> 00:13:08,053
- Now they charge for
everything, even food.

275
00:13:08,087 --> 00:13:11,724
(audience laughs)

276
00:13:11,757 --> 00:13:13,993
(dramatic music)

277
00:13:14,026 --> 00:13:16,729
- [Anna] This cat is so
ready to scare its owner.

278
00:13:17,563 --> 00:13:19,198
Bam! The tables turn.

279
00:13:19,231 --> 00:13:22,001
(audience laughs)

280
00:13:22,034 --> 00:13:23,502
(lively music)

281
00:13:23,536 --> 00:13:27,540
- [Male Speaker] Hey boy,
you wanna go for a walk?

282
00:13:27,573 --> 00:13:29,141
(audience laughs)

283
00:13:29,175 --> 00:13:31,143
- [Devon] What's the
human equivalent to this?

284
00:13:31,177 --> 00:13:32,578
"Do you wanna go to brunch?

285
00:13:32,611 --> 00:13:34,046
Do you wanna go to brunch
and then go shopping

286
00:13:34,079 --> 00:13:36,749
for dish soap, but then
spend $700 by accident

287
00:13:36,782 --> 00:13:38,984
on other fun things
you find at the store?"

288
00:13:39,785 --> 00:13:42,488
(audience laughs)

289
00:13:42,521 --> 00:13:43,722
(lively music)

290
00:13:43,756 --> 00:13:45,291
- [Anna] "So are we
just going to keep

291
00:13:45,324 --> 00:13:46,725
letting this happen, Mom?

292
00:13:46,759 --> 00:13:48,561
Yeah? Okay, great."

293
00:13:51,197 --> 00:13:52,598
- [Elizabeth] We
escape the city life

294
00:13:52,631 --> 00:13:55,467
and venture out into
the countryside.

295
00:13:55,501 --> 00:13:57,603
Down on the Farm coming up next

296
00:13:57,636 --> 00:13:59,305
on the "World's
Funniest Animals."

297
00:14:05,644 --> 00:14:08,280
(upbeat music)

298
00:14:09,548 --> 00:14:11,016
Welcome back to ""World's
Funniest Animals."

299
00:14:11,050 --> 00:14:14,086
I can't wait to show you
these next two segments.

300
00:14:14,119 --> 00:14:16,222
It's not always about the city.

301
00:14:16,255 --> 00:14:19,592
If you wanna find the true
poles of the pet populace

302
00:14:19,625 --> 00:14:21,961
you have to search
Down on the Farm.

303
00:14:24,029 --> 00:14:25,531
(funky music)

304
00:14:25,564 --> 00:14:27,967
- [Daniel] "When you're on
the run all day like I am,

305
00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:29,935
your muscles get sore.

306
00:14:29,969 --> 00:14:32,004
These percussion
massages are really great

307
00:14:32,037 --> 00:14:34,006
to get at those trigger points."

308
00:14:34,039 --> 00:14:35,474
(audience laughs)

309
00:14:35,507 --> 00:14:37,877
"But you need someone who
knows how to use them.

310
00:14:37,910 --> 00:14:41,981
This guy's great. Oh
yeah, that's the spot.

311
00:14:42,014 --> 00:14:46,085
Oh, you got it. Oh,
wow, he's a real pro."

312
00:14:47,586 --> 00:14:50,389
(audience laughs)

313
00:14:50,422 --> 00:14:53,926
(electronic dance music)

314
00:14:55,628 --> 00:14:56,795
- [Devon] This is
bringing me back

315
00:14:56,829 --> 00:14:58,964
to the trauma of
school picture day.

316
00:14:58,998 --> 00:15:00,499
How do I smile again?

317
00:15:00,532 --> 00:15:01,667
(audience laughs)
(camera clicks)

318
00:15:01,700 --> 00:15:02,968
Oh, and the photo's
taken. Great.

319
00:15:04,069 --> 00:15:06,639
(camera clicks)
(audience laughs)

320
00:15:06,672 --> 00:15:09,575
(acoustic guitar)

321
00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:12,144
(audience laughs)

322
00:15:12,177 --> 00:15:13,312
- [Female Speaker]
You have a kitty?

323
00:15:14,747 --> 00:15:17,750
- Wow, to compete on
the track these days,

324
00:15:17,783 --> 00:15:21,387
looks like the jockeys are
really getting smaller.

325
00:15:21,420 --> 00:15:24,423
(audience laughs)

326
00:15:26,825 --> 00:15:29,528
(upbeat music)

327
00:15:29,561 --> 00:15:33,165
(audience laughs)

328
00:15:33,198 --> 00:15:36,135
(happy music)

329
00:15:36,168 --> 00:15:38,804
- Ah, the latest
in spring fashion.

330
00:15:40,539 --> 00:15:42,074
(audience laughs)

331
00:15:42,107 --> 00:15:43,175
(high-pitch braying)

332
00:15:43,208 --> 00:15:46,111
(relaxing music)

333
00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:50,549
(audience laughs)

334
00:15:50,582 --> 00:15:51,483
(high-pitch braying)

335
00:15:51,517 --> 00:15:53,619
- Remember, in a barnyard opera,

336
00:15:53,652 --> 00:15:56,388
it ain't over till
the fat donkey sings.

337
00:15:58,457 --> 00:16:00,392
(high-pitch vibrato braying)

338
00:16:00,426 --> 00:16:03,228
(audience laughs)

339
00:16:03,262 --> 00:16:05,931
(upbeat music)

340
00:16:07,099 --> 00:16:08,567
(cat meows)
(cow snorts)

341
00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:10,369
- This cow acts just like my
friends when I introduced 'em

342
00:16:10,402 --> 00:16:11,570
to someone new.

343
00:16:11,603 --> 00:16:12,771
I'm like, "No,
no, no, it's okay,

344
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,673
you'll like them, I
swear, I know you will."

345
00:16:14,707 --> 00:16:18,210
(electronic dance music)

346
00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:24,483
(audience laughs)

347
00:16:26,952 --> 00:16:28,520
- Like they always say,

348
00:16:28,554 --> 00:16:31,290
an emu is just a big
dog with feathers.

349
00:16:36,061 --> 00:16:38,964
(audience laughs)

350
00:16:46,739 --> 00:16:50,242
- We love our pets, but
sometimes their endless need

351
00:16:50,275 --> 00:16:54,146
for attention can interfere
with getting things done.

352
00:16:54,179 --> 00:16:56,215
Here's Stop What You're Doing.

353
00:16:58,550 --> 00:17:01,153
(mellow music)

354
00:17:04,423 --> 00:17:06,592
(audience laughs)

355
00:17:06,625 --> 00:17:08,761
- [Daniel] Humans
are not very smart.

356
00:17:08,794 --> 00:17:10,696
The woman thinks the cat
just wants a scratch,

357
00:17:10,729 --> 00:17:13,799
when he's actually trying to
tell her the house is on fire.

358
00:17:14,733 --> 00:17:17,636
(audience laughs)

359
00:17:22,074 --> 00:17:24,376
(lively music)

360
00:17:24,410 --> 00:17:25,944
- I think our pets are realizing

361
00:17:25,978 --> 00:17:28,047
what's taking all their
attention from them,

362
00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:31,216
and they are starting a
slow and silent rebellion.

363
00:17:33,585 --> 00:17:36,455
(audience laughs)

364
00:17:36,488 --> 00:17:39,091
(upbeat music)

365
00:17:39,124 --> 00:17:40,659
(audience laughs)

366
00:17:40,692 --> 00:17:43,929
- Besides smoke alarms,
building codes may soon

367
00:17:43,962 --> 00:17:46,398
require these new
safety devices,

368
00:17:46,432 --> 00:17:49,968
which alert you if your cat
was hiding in the closet

369
00:17:50,002 --> 00:17:51,804
when you shut the door.

370
00:17:54,540 --> 00:17:57,743
(loud vibration)
(audience laughs)

371
00:17:57,776 --> 00:18:01,180
(electronic dance music)

372
00:18:02,614 --> 00:18:05,250
- [Carmen] "Hey, hey,
you, please stop eating.

373
00:18:05,284 --> 00:18:06,785
Please pay attention to me,

374
00:18:06,819 --> 00:18:10,322
I'm literally begging, hello?"

375
00:18:10,355 --> 00:18:13,258
(audience laughs)

376
00:18:15,494 --> 00:18:17,896
(dog barks)

377
00:18:18,730 --> 00:18:21,133
(audience laughs)

378
00:18:21,166 --> 00:18:23,168
- [Daniel] "Is this guy
totally deaf or what?

379
00:18:23,202 --> 00:18:25,771
Hey, you are sitting on my tail!

380
00:18:25,804 --> 00:18:26,705
Now get up!"

381
00:18:27,773 --> 00:18:31,477
(dog barks) (audience laughs)

382
00:18:31,510 --> 00:18:34,413
(energetic music)

383
00:18:36,615 --> 00:18:37,916
(audience laughs)

384
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:42,554
In a head-to-head competition,
dog against human.

385
00:18:43,655 --> 00:18:47,126
It boils down to a
serious war of wills

386
00:18:47,159 --> 00:18:50,229
but the results are
quite predictable.

387
00:18:50,262 --> 00:18:51,430
(audience laughs)

388
00:18:51,463 --> 00:18:55,400
The dog will usually
come out on top.

389
00:18:56,935 --> 00:18:59,872
(audience laughs)

390
00:19:04,209 --> 00:19:05,811
- Well, that's almost it for us,

391
00:19:05,844 --> 00:19:08,213
but in case you missed
anything along the way,

392
00:19:08,247 --> 00:19:11,917
here's a quick recap of all
of our funniest moments.

393
00:19:11,950 --> 00:19:16,522
We had Roomba reptiles,
caressing cats, puzzled pooches,

394
00:19:16,555 --> 00:19:20,826
short-order Shibas, amusing
alpacas, feasting ferrets,

395
00:19:20,859 --> 00:19:24,796
and a donkey that enjoys
pillows made of people.

396
00:19:24,830 --> 00:19:26,098
Whew!

397
00:19:26,131 --> 00:19:28,867
(upbeat music)

398
00:19:31,069 --> 00:19:33,739
(audience laughs)
Thanks so much to our panel.

399
00:19:33,772 --> 00:19:36,708
Bye guys, and thank
you for tuning in.

400
00:19:36,742 --> 00:19:38,210
I'm Elizabeth Stanton,

401
00:19:38,243 --> 00:19:40,979
we'll see you next time on
""World's Funniest Animals."