1
00:00:08,759 --> 00:00:10,344
[Heather grunts]
2
00:00:10,344 --> 00:00:16,058
- [yelling] No, no, no, no. No. Hey!
- [Heather grunting]
3
00:00:16,058 --> 00:00:20,312
- [grunts] No, no, no, no, no! [yelps]
- [grunting]
4
00:00:20,312 --> 00:00:22,397
[both grunting, struggling]
5
00:00:24,691 --> 00:00:28,612
I have a buyer!
I'm telling you, I have a fucking buyer!
6
00:00:28,612 --> 00:00:31,615
Well, the luggage in the hallway
tells a different story.
7
00:00:31,615 --> 00:00:33,033
[stutters] Can I-- Can I be honest?
8
00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:34,201
- [Bob grunts]
- Please.
9
00:00:34,201 --> 00:00:36,286
Two things can be true.
10
00:00:36,286 --> 00:00:38,622
I can want to disappear,
11
00:00:38,622 --> 00:00:41,208
- and I can have a buyer. [groaning]
- [Heather struggles]
12
00:00:44,002 --> 00:00:44,920
Here's what's true.
13
00:00:44,920 --> 00:00:47,005
- [grunts, straining]
- I lead a stressful life,
14
00:00:47,005 --> 00:00:48,924
there's a lot of moving parts.
15
00:00:48,924 --> 00:00:54,429
And La Pastorale, well,
it relieved some of that.
16
00:00:54,429 --> 00:00:55,430
[grunts]
17
00:00:55,430 --> 00:00:57,891
[Arman] Those naked ladies
reclining in a field,
18
00:00:57,891 --> 00:01:03,480
it brought me joy because
I was connected to a fucking genius.
19
00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:04,940
Oh, yeah. No, I get that.
20
00:01:04,940 --> 00:01:06,775
- Totally. [grunts]
- [Arman] Here's another truth:
21
00:01:06,775 --> 00:01:09,528
- I was connecting to a knockoff...
- [Heather pants]
22
00:01:09,528 --> 00:01:12,447
...painted by your wife in her crafts room.
23
00:01:12,447 --> 00:01:14,700
You robbed him of joy,
you fucker! [breathes heavily]
24
00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:16,660
- [groans, pants]
- [Arman] You humiliated me, Bob.
25
00:01:16,660 --> 00:01:19,872
I showed that picture to people.
They're laughing at me now.
26
00:01:19,872 --> 00:01:22,416
- I am so sorry. A-And I am fixing it.
- [Heather breathing heavily]
27
00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:24,835
[grunts] No! No, no, not the nipple!
28
00:01:24,835 --> 00:01:26,753
- No! No!
- [Arman] Okay, hold on. H-Hold on.
29
00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:29,298
- Where's this buyer?
- [stutters] Uh, Florence.
30
00:01:29,298 --> 00:01:31,466
- No, please! Don't take the-- [cries]
- Heather, honey. Heather.
31
00:01:31,466 --> 00:01:33,760
His name is Kachel.
James Kachel. [breathes heavily]
32
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:36,138
And how did you come to find Mr. Kachel?
33
00:01:36,138 --> 00:01:39,308
I-- He's an associate of Peggy's.
34
00:01:39,308 --> 00:01:40,809
- Peggy?
- [Bob groans]
35
00:01:41,852 --> 00:01:43,061
Who's Peggy?
36
00:01:43,061 --> 00:01:44,563
Aah. [sighs] I'm late.
37
00:01:44,563 --> 00:01:47,566
- I'm sorry, business. [sighs]
- [cell phone buzzing]
38
00:01:49,193 --> 00:01:51,153
Well, he passed. So it's over.
39
00:01:51,153 --> 00:01:53,864
He can't pass. We have a contract.
40
00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:55,824
No, we don't.
41
00:01:55,824 --> 00:01:58,702
Look, I was talking with your mother
about my play,
42
00:01:58,702 --> 00:02:00,412
it all came about very naturally.
43
00:02:00,412 --> 00:02:03,832
I just arranged this meeting
so that you would feel involved.
44
00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:06,710
[inhales sharply] You talked to my mother?
45
00:02:06,710 --> 00:02:09,713
[breathing heavily, sighs]
46
00:02:12,424 --> 00:02:13,634
[whispers] Hey. Psst.
47
00:02:14,301 --> 00:02:15,511
Ta-da.
48
00:02:18,055 --> 00:02:19,431
Is that a lady's finger?
49
00:02:19,431 --> 00:02:22,100
Yeah, 'cause we're looking
for a missing lady.
50
00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:25,812
We're also looking for 70K
in reward money, and this is it.
51
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:30,317
Okay. Don't point it at me.
Where did you get that?
52
00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:31,735
Oh, Jesus. Peggy.
53
00:02:31,735 --> 00:02:33,904
Judy chucked it up. [breathing heavily]
54
00:02:33,904 --> 00:02:36,365
Well, Judy might wanna go see a doctor.
55
00:02:37,032 --> 00:02:38,200
Judy's a dog.
56
00:02:39,243 --> 00:02:43,080
So, that's a dead lady's finger
in dog vomit?
57
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:46,834
[sighs] Fuck. This little mix of bone
and knuckle and fat--
58
00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:49,169
Okay. Let's not describe it.
Just put it in there.
59
00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:51,129
It's gonna change our fucking lives.
60
00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:52,548
It better.
61
00:02:52,548 --> 00:02:53,841
{\an8}["True Love Part 2" playing]
62
00:03:26,415 --> 00:03:30,627
Turns out that I'm a natural.
[chuckles] And an academic.
63
00:03:30,627 --> 00:03:33,088
I'm top of my class at PI school.
64
00:03:34,131 --> 00:03:35,424
- Really?
- [sighs]
65
00:03:35,424 --> 00:03:39,595
Well, Dirk says you're always late,
and by the end of class, you're slurring.
66
00:03:39,595 --> 00:03:42,764
It's my Bell's palsy,
kicks in around noonish.
67
00:03:42,764 --> 00:03:45,392
- [cell phone buzzing]
- Ah, look. See?
68
00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:49,229
Hey. I'm on a date.
I can't talk right now.
69
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:52,107
And yes, we will be having sex,
so don't call again till tomorrow.
70
00:03:52,107 --> 00:03:53,817
No, no, no. No, no, no, wait!
71
00:03:55,736 --> 00:03:56,862
[sighs]
72
00:03:57,446 --> 00:03:58,697
[sighs]
73
00:03:59,448 --> 00:04:03,869
Anyway, the point is,
I got ya a contract at Pioneertown.
74
00:04:03,869 --> 00:04:07,581
And I found the fucking finger
of Dona fucking Scarborough.
75
00:04:07,581 --> 00:04:09,208
- O-Okay. You're right.
- [sighs]
76
00:04:09,208 --> 00:04:11,960
But let's hold off on going to the cops
with the finger
77
00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:14,796
because they'll grab credit or bungle it.
78
00:04:14,796 --> 00:04:17,257
Our next move
is we're gonna get the finger tested
79
00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:18,841
for DNA, you understand?
80
00:04:18,841 --> 00:04:21,386
- How long does that take?
- [stutters] Two, three days.
81
00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:24,181
The tricky part is getting DNA
from the family,
82
00:04:24,181 --> 00:04:26,558
but I know somebody at Ancestry, so...
83
00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:31,605
Let's back up a minute here, okay?
Do you wanna thank me for any of this?
84
00:04:32,356 --> 00:04:33,815
All right, look, I gotta say,
85
00:04:33,815 --> 00:04:36,860
at the beginning
I really didn't expect much from you,
86
00:04:36,860 --> 00:04:43,075
but the scope of this thing could put us
on the map. I mean, it's-- [wheezing]
87
00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:49,998
[sighs] Is this a medical condition?
88
00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:51,416
[whimpers]
89
00:04:51,416 --> 00:04:55,295
Okay. I'm being a friend right now.
It's a turnoff.
90
00:04:57,089 --> 00:04:58,006
[sniffs]
91
00:05:00,843 --> 00:05:03,303
I can confirm it's her finger
in the morning.
92
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:04,263
How?
93
00:05:04,263 --> 00:05:06,598
Don't worry about it.
I just need the nail.
94
00:05:07,099 --> 00:05:08,725
And don't contaminate the finger.
95
00:05:10,519 --> 00:05:15,941
I'm not separating the nail
from a dead, disgusting finger.
96
00:05:15,941 --> 00:05:18,235
[people in nail salon chattering]
97
00:05:20,112 --> 00:05:21,655
Where'd you get this?
98
00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:24,449
I found it in my boyfriend's sheets.
99
00:05:24,449 --> 00:05:26,994
I suspect there's a third person
in that bed.
100
00:05:26,994 --> 00:05:27,911
Who's your boyfriend?
101
00:05:29,121 --> 00:05:30,831
Let's just say he's a guru.
102
00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:33,625
Who's my competition?
103
00:05:35,085 --> 00:05:37,546
His wife. She was a regular.
104
00:05:37,546 --> 00:05:39,173
He said she was out of the picture.
105
00:05:39,173 --> 00:05:41,091
She is. She disappeared a year ago.
106
00:05:42,885 --> 00:05:43,719
Were they in trouble?
107
00:05:45,929 --> 00:05:48,223
She sat here for hours, no?
108
00:05:49,016 --> 00:05:51,435
She must've told you
all kinds of weird shit.
109
00:05:52,811 --> 00:05:54,271
I don't paint and tell.
110
00:05:54,271 --> 00:05:58,400
Hey, I'm the victim here.
My boyfriend may be cheating.
111
00:05:58,400 --> 00:06:02,779
I need to know if these bumps
on my leg are razor burns or scabies.
112
00:06:03,447 --> 00:06:07,492
If he hasn't changed his sheets in a year, mama...
113
00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:16,543
[door chimes]
114
00:06:16,543 --> 00:06:19,296
When bitches on Twitter say
I can't do makeup, I say,
115
00:06:19,296 --> 00:06:22,841
"Um, then what's this art?"
Okay? All right.
116
00:06:22,841 --> 00:06:24,384
So now we're gonna do the other eye,
117
00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:26,053
- nice and-- Oh, God.
- [client 1] Oh, no.
118
00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:28,180
- [entertainer 1] Oh, no.
- Nick, what's-her-name's here!
119
00:06:28,180 --> 00:06:29,890
- [Lionel Richie] Oh, no.
- [Nick] Two minutes.
120
00:06:29,890 --> 00:06:31,934
Do you have a bathroom
I can use that won't kill me
121
00:06:31,934 --> 00:06:33,143
or get me pregnant?
122
00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:35,646
You can still get pregnant?
123
00:06:35,646 --> 00:06:37,689
[sighs]
124
00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:41,818
Gross.
125
00:06:42,611 --> 00:06:44,154
[groans, grunts]
126
00:06:45,113 --> 00:06:47,282
[sighing]
127
00:06:47,282 --> 00:06:49,785
[people moaning, grunting]
128
00:06:55,707 --> 00:06:59,920
- [entertainer 1] Oh, yeah. [moaning]
- [groans] Oh, hey, what's up?
129
00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:02,464
Jimmy Hoffa's family just signed on
to the book. [gasps]
130
00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:03,382
Oh, okay.
131
00:07:03,382 --> 00:07:05,342
[Peggy] They're breaking their silence
after 50 years.
132
00:07:05,342 --> 00:07:08,136
So now Random House wants
to publish for Christmas.
133
00:07:08,136 --> 00:07:09,263
All right.
134
00:07:09,263 --> 00:07:12,307
[chuckles] So the word on the street
is this will be a major stocking-stuffer,
135
00:07:12,307 --> 00:07:15,769
which will lead to more TV appearances
and more money,
136
00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:18,981
and most importantly,
get our loved ones back.
137
00:07:18,981 --> 00:07:22,568
Unless they're dead,
which Hoffa definitely is.
138
00:07:22,568 --> 00:07:24,111
[chuckles] So, what do you want from me?
139
00:07:24,111 --> 00:07:27,030
Oh, I'm just sharing the good news
and handing out lollipops
140
00:07:27,030 --> 00:07:29,324
to participating families.
141
00:07:29,324 --> 00:07:31,410
[chuckles] Thank you. [chuckles]
142
00:07:31,410 --> 00:07:33,537
We could talk about spa tie-ins
if you want. [chuckles]
143
00:07:33,537 --> 00:07:35,706
Oh, we don't advertise.
We're word of mouth.
144
00:07:35,706 --> 00:07:38,125
- Understood. [sighs]
- [Lionel Richie squawking]
145
00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:39,751
So you like edibles, huh? [chuckles]
146
00:07:39,751 --> 00:07:42,004
- What? [smacks lips] No, no, I--
- [Lionel Richie chirps]
147
00:07:42,004 --> 00:07:44,840
Oh, sorry. Wrong one. So sorry. Here.
148
00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:46,216
[Lionel Richie] Oy vey.
149
00:07:46,216 --> 00:07:48,552
[sighs] I'll be back
when the contracts are ready.
150
00:07:48,552 --> 00:07:50,470
[Lionel Richie chirping, squawking]
151
00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:52,347
- Can I have one?
- [door chimes]
152
00:07:52,347 --> 00:07:53,891
- Okay.
- [Lionel Richie] Okay.
153
00:07:53,891 --> 00:07:55,267
So, the finger's getting tested.
154
00:07:55,267 --> 00:07:57,769
I have a guy who doesn't ask questions.
155
00:07:57,769 --> 00:08:01,398
If someone gave me a finger,
I'd ask questions, but he doesn't, so...
156
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:05,152
[stutters] Ca-- Can you put those down?
Those are military grade.
157
00:08:05,152 --> 00:08:07,946
Please. Peggy, can you put 'em down?
158
00:08:08,572 --> 00:08:12,075
[stutters] So he's backlogged,
which means it's gonna take a week.
159
00:08:12,075 --> 00:08:16,163
No. Get a rush on it. Come on.
Can't we pay to get a rush?
160
00:08:16,163 --> 00:08:20,751
The DNA on the lollipop is gonna match
what's left of the finger.
161
00:08:21,752 --> 00:08:24,713
[sighs]
By the way, I think she died for her art.
162
00:08:25,923 --> 00:08:27,758
- Whose art?
- Dona.
163
00:08:27,758 --> 00:08:30,802
She painted stolen masterpieces.
Fabulous, by the way.
164
00:08:30,802 --> 00:08:32,011
Dona Scarborough?
165
00:08:32,011 --> 00:08:33,764
You didn't need to know until now,
166
00:08:33,764 --> 00:08:36,975
but the guru sold a fake
to this father-daughter hit team,
167
00:08:36,975 --> 00:08:40,270
and now Daddy and his bruiser
want their money back.
168
00:08:41,145 --> 00:08:42,481
What bruiser?
169
00:08:42,481 --> 00:08:44,441
Well, the daughter's like a linebacker.
170
00:08:45,234 --> 00:08:48,403
[stutters] Is the bald bird part of this?
171
00:08:48,987 --> 00:08:50,155
In a way, yes.
172
00:08:51,990 --> 00:08:53,492
Oh, my God.
173
00:08:53,492 --> 00:08:54,910
I'm gonna lose my business.
174
00:08:54,910 --> 00:08:56,036
Would you stop?
175
00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:59,706
You're getting your business back.
Like, soon. Like, next week.
176
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,959
More like Friday if you order this rush.
177
00:09:01,959 --> 00:09:03,502
[cell phone buzzing]
178
00:09:04,086 --> 00:09:06,046
Oh, for fuck's sakes.
179
00:09:14,388 --> 00:09:15,222
[knocking]
180
00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:16,890
[through door] It's me. Open the door.
181
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:19,226
Ugh, we need a plan,
and I need a bathroom.
182
00:09:19,226 --> 00:09:21,353
Think on that. [sighs]
183
00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,361
[Cooper] Yo! Guys, come on.
184
00:09:31,613 --> 00:09:32,698
[friend chuckles]
185
00:09:34,825 --> 00:09:36,118
[both friends grunting, giggling]
186
00:09:36,618 --> 00:09:37,911
[friend 2 chuckling] Come on.
187
00:09:38,620 --> 00:09:40,581
[Carol] The plan is habeas fucking corpus.
188
00:09:40,581 --> 00:09:42,708
The corpus is being tested.
189
00:09:42,708 --> 00:09:45,794
It was gonna take a week, but...
[sighs] ...I got a rush on it, 48 hours.
190
00:09:45,794 --> 00:09:48,922
[Carol] Okay, fine. We'll avoid the guru
till we got a positive ID,
191
00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:51,800
then go straight to the Gattchis
and claim the reward.
192
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:54,386
Ugh, it's gonna be a pain in the ass
avoiding this guy.
193
00:09:54,386 --> 00:09:55,470
He calls me every second.
194
00:09:55,470 --> 00:09:56,388
Hmm.
195
00:09:56,388 --> 00:09:58,182
Hold on. Surveillance pictures.
196
00:09:58,807 --> 00:10:00,767
- Ooh.
- [Carol] Mmm.
197
00:10:01,768 --> 00:10:03,979
Ooh. Guilty.
198
00:10:03,979 --> 00:10:07,816
[Carol] Coop got some real cute shots.
And the kid's good with an iPhone, huh?
199
00:10:07,816 --> 00:10:09,234
[Peggy] Mmm, she may have a knack.
200
00:10:09,902 --> 00:10:11,945
Okay. You're aces, thanks. [sighs]
201
00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:14,740
[grunts] I gotta go. I love you.
202
00:10:23,999 --> 00:10:26,126
[panting]
203
00:10:29,546 --> 00:10:30,839
[sighs]
204
00:10:38,347 --> 00:10:39,723
Ooh. [sighs]
205
00:10:49,441 --> 00:10:50,817
[pants]
206
00:10:52,528 --> 00:10:54,196
[groans, winces]
207
00:10:56,907 --> 00:10:58,700
[line ringing]
208
00:10:58,700 --> 00:11:00,661
[treatment center worker]
High Desert Treatment Center.
209
00:11:00,661 --> 00:11:02,704
Hi, is Mary there? [sighs]
210
00:11:02,704 --> 00:11:04,706
[treatment center worker]
Uh, no, I-I think it's Mary's day off.
211
00:11:04,706 --> 00:11:07,084
[exhales sharply, sighs]
I'll be right there.
212
00:11:10,671 --> 00:11:14,591
- [Denny exhales sharply]
- [Chunky] Uh, good. Good.
213
00:11:17,845 --> 00:11:18,887
Is it in slo-mo?
214
00:11:18,887 --> 00:11:21,265
- Oh. [through phone] Yeah.
- Make sure we're filming it in slo-mo.
215
00:11:21,265 --> 00:11:23,934
What the fuck is this?
What's he doing here?
216
00:11:23,934 --> 00:11:24,935
- He gave me a ride.
- [dog barks]
217
00:11:24,935 --> 00:11:26,895
- I'm actually a good guy.
- [Peggy sighs]
218
00:11:26,895 --> 00:11:28,772
Oh, what's up, Judy?
219
00:11:28,772 --> 00:11:30,440
[sighs] Get him outta here.
220
00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:31,775
[Denny] Peg, he's helping me
221
00:11:31,775 --> 00:11:32,901
- build my business.
- [sighs]
222
00:11:32,901 --> 00:11:36,572
I've got clientele already, okay?
And they're demanding content.
223
00:11:36,572 --> 00:11:39,825
I've got an email list of men
who are looking for a safe place
224
00:11:39,825 --> 00:11:41,827
to practice Qigong and shit.
225
00:11:42,452 --> 00:11:43,579
What do you say?
226
00:11:43,579 --> 00:11:46,123
- Is it cool if we use the dojo out back?
- No.
227
00:11:46,123 --> 00:11:47,708
- Just to build a following.
- No.
228
00:11:47,708 --> 00:11:49,668
- Maybe raise a little seed money.
- No.
229
00:11:49,668 --> 00:11:51,420
- And crash there once in a while.
- No.
230
00:11:51,420 --> 00:11:52,921
- I can't get an apartment.
- Nope.
231
00:11:52,921 --> 00:11:54,631
Nobody allows dogs.
232
00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:56,800
[sighs] Okay, fine.
233
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:58,010
Ah, that's great.
234
00:11:58,010 --> 00:11:59,511
[Peggy] But no Chunky.
235
00:11:59,511 --> 00:12:01,180
And you're not allowed in the kitchen.
236
00:12:01,180 --> 00:12:03,015
- [Denny] Of course not.
- Or the bathroom.
237
00:12:03,015 --> 00:12:04,099
Really?
238
00:12:05,100 --> 00:12:09,062
Okay, yeah. There's a gas station
about ten minutes away. I can walk.
239
00:12:10,022 --> 00:12:12,274
- This is great, babe. I mean, Peg.
- [scoffs] Ugh.
240
00:12:12,274 --> 00:12:14,234
- So generous.
- [engine revving]
241
00:12:15,527 --> 00:12:16,528
Thanks, Peg!
242
00:12:31,126 --> 00:12:34,296
[sighing]
Hi. Peggy Newman. What's your name?
243
00:12:34,296 --> 00:12:36,006
Erin. I'm new. Bear with me.
244
00:12:36,006 --> 00:12:37,966
Erin. I like that, that's Celtic.
245
00:12:38,550 --> 00:12:42,930
Yeah, well, I get three milligrams
and I work my way up to a week take home.
246
00:12:42,930 --> 00:12:45,307
[sighs] We did the piss test last week.
247
00:12:45,307 --> 00:12:47,809
That was a big step.
It's been a journey. [sighs]
248
00:12:47,809 --> 00:12:50,103
Oh, well, congratulations.
249
00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:53,774
- Thanks. [inhales sharply]
- I don't see that in the system, so--
250
00:12:53,774 --> 00:12:55,817
Oh, yeah, yeah. System always goes down.
251
00:12:55,817 --> 00:12:59,279
- Hold up there.
- Mary. I thought it was your day off.
252
00:12:59,863 --> 00:13:01,365
I'm doing a little paperwork.
253
00:13:01,365 --> 00:13:04,243
You ready to take your urine test?
You're almost at your goal.
254
00:13:04,243 --> 00:13:05,327
Yeah, yeah.
255
00:13:05,327 --> 00:13:06,578
Oh, shit. You know what?
256
00:13:06,578 --> 00:13:09,206
I-- I just ate a poppy seed bagel.
257
00:13:10,165 --> 00:13:11,416
I ate five, actually.
258
00:13:11,416 --> 00:13:12,835
- I should've stopped at three...
- Oh.
259
00:13:12,835 --> 00:13:16,213
...but since my mother died,
I've been using food.
260
00:13:16,797 --> 00:13:18,215
I'm gonna get a false positive.
261
00:13:18,215 --> 00:13:21,802
Peggy. We're not gonna deny you,
but we can't give you the week's supply.
262
00:13:21,802 --> 00:13:22,803
God.
263
00:13:22,803 --> 00:13:27,432
You gotta take, you know,
fucking monsoon season into account.
264
00:13:27,432 --> 00:13:29,560
My fibromyalgia is going nuts.
265
00:13:29,560 --> 00:13:32,354
It's Palm Springs.
There is no monsoon season.
266
00:13:32,354 --> 00:13:34,022
Well, there's barometric pressure.
267
00:13:34,022 --> 00:13:37,860
And there's pressure pressure.
I'm writing a play.
268
00:13:37,860 --> 00:13:40,571
Plus, my new job,
it's really fucking dangerous.
269
00:13:40,571 --> 00:13:42,447
[sighs] Sorry.
270
00:13:43,407 --> 00:13:44,491
[exhales sharply] Fuck it.
271
00:13:52,749 --> 00:13:53,792
[Peggy] You seen Gill?
272
00:13:57,754 --> 00:13:58,755
You seen Gill?
273
00:14:00,340 --> 00:14:01,592
Gill got arrested.
274
00:14:03,010 --> 00:14:05,053
Anyone taking over his business interests?
275
00:14:05,971 --> 00:14:07,431
His business interests.
276
00:14:08,015 --> 00:14:10,684
The pills. You know,
the ones that make you crabby as fuck
277
00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:11,727
if you can't get them.
278
00:14:11,727 --> 00:14:14,146
- [cell phone buzzing]
- Fuck.
279
00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:16,982
I got some steaks if you want 'em.
280
00:14:16,982 --> 00:14:19,526
No, I already got a deal with Jesse
over at Ruth's Chris.
281
00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:21,570
[breathes deeply]
282
00:14:22,446 --> 00:14:23,947
How about that joint? [chuckles]
283
00:14:27,910 --> 00:14:32,539
{\an8}I'm trying to get the door and the safe,
but it's not very secure.
284
00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:34,917
- [echoing] It's a little wobbly.
- Don't worry, it's fine.
285
00:14:34,917 --> 00:14:36,376
[Brenda grunts]
286
00:14:37,794 --> 00:14:38,962
Hello, Brenda.
287
00:14:40,923 --> 00:14:43,258
[chuckles] I'm trying to be nice, Brenda.
288
00:14:43,258 --> 00:14:45,302
- What did I do?
- [Bruce] How do you freshen it up?
289
00:14:45,302 --> 00:14:47,804
[sighs] A nod is not a hello.
It's a "fuck you" with your face.
290
00:14:48,805 --> 00:14:53,018
- Is this about Roger?
- No, my worth isn't tied to a man.
291
00:14:53,018 --> 00:14:55,354
I'm a private investigator now.
292
00:14:55,354 --> 00:14:57,648
[Peggy breathes deeply, sighs]
293
00:15:02,528 --> 00:15:03,487
[Bruce] What are you doing?
294
00:15:03,487 --> 00:15:06,448
I got a play to put on,
plus eight million other things.
295
00:15:06,448 --> 00:15:09,284
That guru bastard keeps calling me
every five minutes.
296
00:15:09,284 --> 00:15:15,290
My living situation is dicey,
plus I'm juggling, like, five suitors.
297
00:15:15,290 --> 00:15:16,500
[sighs] It never ends.
298
00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:19,127
I meant what are you doing
with the K-Cups?
299
00:15:19,628 --> 00:15:22,714
Oh. The coffee sucks,
but I need the caffeine.
300
00:15:22,714 --> 00:15:25,259
Yeah, well, I've been tasked
with stuff like this.
301
00:15:25,259 --> 00:15:29,638
- Shit like disappearing K-Cups.
- Oh, good. People abuse it.
302
00:15:30,639 --> 00:15:32,015
The cheating spouse... [sighs]
303
00:15:32,015 --> 00:15:34,142
...she's cheating with a girlfriend,
by the way.
304
00:15:34,142 --> 00:15:36,895
You owe me 13.95.
I printed that at Staples.
305
00:15:36,895 --> 00:15:38,730
- I lost the receipt.
- [cell phone buzzing]
306
00:15:38,730 --> 00:15:40,315
[groans] For fuck's sakes.
307
00:15:40,983 --> 00:15:44,027
Can't we get a super-express
on that finger?
308
00:15:46,697 --> 00:15:48,740
[machinery whirring]
309
00:15:58,834 --> 00:16:01,461
[machine powers down]
310
00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:02,546
Peggy.
311
00:16:05,674 --> 00:16:08,385
Looks like you got a lot
on that beautiful mind of yours.
312
00:16:08,385 --> 00:16:10,637
Ha. You say the same thing to Brenda?
313
00:16:12,055 --> 00:16:14,683
We mostly just talk
about Star Wars. [sighs]
314
00:16:15,350 --> 00:16:16,185
And owls.
315
00:16:16,935 --> 00:16:17,769
[grunts]
316
00:16:18,353 --> 00:16:19,646
It's your mind I want.
317
00:16:20,355 --> 00:16:22,774
N-Not in a mind control-y kind of way.
318
00:16:24,067 --> 00:16:27,321
Speaking of which,
how's your boyfriend, the guru?
319
00:16:27,321 --> 00:16:30,699
- I'm not going out with the guru, Roger.
- [cell phone buzzing]
320
00:16:30,699 --> 00:16:31,742
[Peggy groans]
321
00:16:32,242 --> 00:16:34,661
Well, I hope you're happy, Peggy.
[chuckles]
322
00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:36,997
[Peggy] Happiness is a process.
It's a practice.
323
00:16:36,997 --> 00:16:39,625
I'm on my path. That's all I'm gonna say.
324
00:16:39,625 --> 00:16:41,043
What's with the heavy artillery?
325
00:16:41,043 --> 00:16:44,838
What's w-with it? [chuckles]
This is what you promised my mother.
326
00:16:45,339 --> 00:16:47,966
You told her something
about somebody being shot out of a cannon
327
00:16:47,966 --> 00:16:49,426
for the President's Day Weekend show?
328
00:16:49,426 --> 00:16:52,596
Uh, first of all, your mother might not
understand metaphors.
329
00:16:52,596 --> 00:16:56,350
I said my play would be shooting us
out of a cannon.
330
00:16:57,100 --> 00:16:59,478
And number two, I don't think
we'll be opening this week...
331
00:16:59,478 --> 00:17:02,231
[stammering] No-- [chuckles]
You will open by Friday.
332
00:17:02,231 --> 00:17:05,608
- You will open by the 18th.
- What's with the 18th?
333
00:17:05,608 --> 00:17:07,694
You're getting shot out
of this cannon, either way.
334
00:17:07,694 --> 00:17:08,779
Not happening.
335
00:17:09,655 --> 00:17:11,031
Wait a minute... [scoffs]
336
00:17:12,241 --> 00:17:15,452
The 18th is your mother's birthday.
That's what this is all about, isn't it?
337
00:17:15,452 --> 00:17:18,079
No, this is about
the President's Day Weekend show.
338
00:17:18,079 --> 00:17:21,541
Which happens to coincide
with your mother's birthday.
339
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:24,670
No, it's about patriotism.
340
00:17:24,670 --> 00:17:27,631
And stealing business
from car lot sales events.
341
00:17:27,631 --> 00:17:33,303
The cannon, the fanfare, the glitz.
It's all about winning your mother's love.
342
00:17:33,303 --> 00:17:35,347
- [Owen scoffs, sighs]
- You have to read Electra, Owen.
343
00:17:35,347 --> 00:17:36,849
It doesn't end well.
344
00:17:36,849 --> 00:17:40,394
A cannon is going off this weekend, Peggy!
And you are gonna be the cannonball.
345
00:17:40,394 --> 00:17:43,355
There's no cannons in my play.
Plus, I have fibromyalgia.
346
00:17:44,398 --> 00:17:46,608
Well, it's a part of the play now!
347
00:17:46,608 --> 00:17:50,279
Ginger and I already wrote the cannon
into the play!
348
00:17:50,279 --> 00:17:51,822
I beg your fucking pardon.
349
00:17:52,322 --> 00:17:57,703
"'Twas my brother, Rutherford,
my own blood, who taught me how to fight.
350
00:17:58,203 --> 00:17:59,204
He was a saber--"
351
00:17:59,204 --> 00:18:02,374
Oh, Owen came up with a Civil War story.
352
00:18:02,374 --> 00:18:04,626
I think it's very strong. Listen to this.
353
00:18:04,626 --> 00:18:09,256
So, Colonel Fanshawe turns to me
on the verandah and he says,
354
00:18:09,256 --> 00:18:15,012
"Golly, Molly Perkins, I believe
the cannon is about to chime midnight."
355
00:18:16,513 --> 00:18:17,514
It's rough.
356
00:18:17,514 --> 00:18:19,933
Can I offer some constructive criticism?
357
00:18:21,059 --> 00:18:21,894
I hate it.
358
00:18:21,894 --> 00:18:26,106
[sighs] That is not constructive,
and it's heavy on the criticism.
359
00:18:26,106 --> 00:18:29,776
We open in two days.
Someone has to right this ship.
360
00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:33,113
And I'll tell you this,
no one sits through two hours
361
00:18:33,113 --> 00:18:35,532
of somebody working out
their mommy issues.
362
00:18:35,532 --> 00:18:37,326
[chuckles]
Tell that to William Shakespeare.
363
00:18:37,326 --> 00:18:38,785
Tell it to Neil Simon.
364
00:18:38,785 --> 00:18:43,248
[chewing] Oh, and by the way,
I'm recasting you with a woman of color.
365
00:18:43,248 --> 00:18:45,209
To play your mother?
366
00:18:45,209 --> 00:18:47,002
It has to be more like "Hamilton."
367
00:18:47,794 --> 00:18:50,547
[Ginger]
This is just like you, to quit things.
368
00:18:51,215 --> 00:18:53,008
[echoing] Remember you quit
the Girl Scouts
369
00:18:53,008 --> 00:18:54,801
the week they had the cookie sale?
370
00:18:54,801 --> 00:18:58,472
They had to buy back all your boxes.
You left them in the red.
371
00:18:58,472 --> 00:19:01,642
Or the ice skating? You went once.
372
00:19:01,642 --> 00:19:05,187
That tutu ended up right in the garbage.
373
00:19:07,648 --> 00:19:10,317
You never cared that I quit things.
374
00:19:11,109 --> 00:19:16,365
You said that the Girl Scouts was a racket
and a Ponzi scheme.
375
00:19:17,366 --> 00:19:18,367
[chuckles]
376
00:19:20,577 --> 00:19:22,996
You were my best friend.
377
00:19:28,919 --> 00:19:32,297
But you're not her.
378
00:19:34,675 --> 00:19:36,802
You're the lady on the bus.
379
00:19:38,512 --> 00:19:40,180
Take that bus home.
380
00:19:41,306 --> 00:19:44,768
Because I changed the lines?
It-- It was a pitch!
381
00:19:44,768 --> 00:19:46,228
You know what a pitch is.
382
00:19:48,146 --> 00:19:48,981
[exhales]
383
00:19:51,859 --> 00:19:54,069
[sighs] What do you want already?
384
00:19:54,069 --> 00:19:56,738
[Bob] Uh, hey, it's me. It's Bob.
385
00:19:56,738 --> 00:19:58,782
Seems like you're super busy.
386
00:19:58,782 --> 00:20:02,202
I'm actually calling because
the hospital gave me a 60 count of Oxy.
387
00:20:02,202 --> 00:20:05,497
And since it's clearly your thing,
I thought you might want them.
388
00:20:05,497 --> 00:20:08,792
So, I'll just leave them
on my porch till tomorrow.
389
00:20:20,220 --> 00:20:21,889
[sighs]
390
00:20:23,682 --> 00:20:26,185
- [screams, struggles]
- [Heather struggles]
391
00:20:27,102 --> 00:20:30,647
[grunts] Okay, Brunhilda!
Can we take it down a notch?
392
00:20:30,647 --> 00:20:35,194
I've got fibromyalgia!
I find violence very triggering.
393
00:20:35,903 --> 00:20:39,239
Hey. Can't we just talk
without the bondage?
394
00:20:39,239 --> 00:20:41,491
[Arman] Heather, get in here.
You gotta try this.
395
00:20:41,992 --> 00:20:43,493
- [Arman] Come and taste this saffron.
- [breathes deeply]
396
00:20:43,493 --> 00:20:48,624
Uh, I just added a pinch.
I used almost no butter. Almost. [blows]
397
00:20:48,624 --> 00:20:51,001
- [Peggy sighs]
- You are so full of shit!
398
00:20:51,585 --> 00:20:53,921
I reverse Google-image-searched
that buyer you sent over.
399
00:20:53,921 --> 00:20:56,298
He is a known criminal! So are you!
400
00:20:56,924 --> 00:20:58,133
Of course, he's a criminal!
401
00:20:58,133 --> 00:21:00,135
Who do you think buys stolen paintings?
402
00:21:00,135 --> 00:21:01,261
- Nuns?
- Ha.
403
00:21:01,261 --> 00:21:04,389
And I did zero jail time
'cause that was his crime.
404
00:21:04,389 --> 00:21:06,808
Well, there's still a hell of a lot
of criminality surrounding you.
405
00:21:06,808 --> 00:21:09,394
I do not like it one bit.
406
00:21:09,978 --> 00:21:11,146
[Peggy scoffs]
407
00:21:11,146 --> 00:21:13,398
[chuckles] You need me
to acknowledge the knife?
408
00:21:13,398 --> 00:21:14,816
Okay, I see your knife.
409
00:21:14,816 --> 00:21:17,736
Hey, I'm not a good candidate.
I have hemophilia.
410
00:21:19,404 --> 00:21:21,490
You don't have hemophilia.
411
00:21:21,490 --> 00:21:23,450
Yeah, actually, I do.
412
00:21:23,450 --> 00:21:26,787
Fibromyalgia, hemophilia.
I got a lot of problems.
413
00:21:26,787 --> 00:21:27,871
Yeah, no shit.
414
00:21:28,622 --> 00:21:29,540
Really?
415
00:21:29,540 --> 00:21:35,003
- Bobby here owes--
- Bob or Robert. It-- [stammering]
416
00:21:35,587 --> 00:21:37,172
Or whatever. It's fine.
417
00:21:40,050 --> 00:21:43,387
Bobsie here owes me a lot of money.
418
00:21:43,887 --> 00:21:47,391
- And he says that you can help me get it.
- She can.
419
00:21:47,391 --> 00:21:49,977
- You can.
- [scoffs] How are you to find a buyer
420
00:21:49,977 --> 00:21:53,021
- for one of Bobsie here's fake paintings?
- [Bob stammers]
421
00:21:53,021 --> 00:21:55,232
- I already have.
- Uh, she's already got one.
422
00:21:56,275 --> 00:21:58,402
How do you know anyone
that has over a million?
423
00:21:58,402 --> 00:22:01,780
I used to work
for James Kachel in New York.
424
00:22:01,780 --> 00:22:04,199
- He's a very big collector.
- Huge.
425
00:22:05,450 --> 00:22:08,036
Well, big collectors know forgeries.
426
00:22:08,036 --> 00:22:09,997
- Well, some do, some don't.
- [chuckles]
427
00:22:09,997 --> 00:22:13,876
Uh, lesser works
have taken in better collectors.
428
00:22:13,876 --> 00:22:15,711
Kachel sees a profit margin here.
429
00:22:17,296 --> 00:22:19,882
You think I'm a fucking philistine?
430
00:22:20,465 --> 00:22:21,675
N-No, she does not.
431
00:22:22,676 --> 00:22:26,555
No, I think you're Arman Landau.
A pretty decent collector.
432
00:22:26,555 --> 00:22:29,641
You live in Rancho Mirage, 5537 Cabernet.
433
00:22:29,641 --> 00:22:31,894
[Heather breathes deeply]
434
00:22:34,146 --> 00:22:37,608
- [laughing] Is this your parlor trick?
- [chuckles]
435
00:22:37,608 --> 00:22:40,360
- You think you know me?
- No, I don't think I know you.
436
00:22:40,360 --> 00:22:42,654
Okay, Heather is living with you for now,
437
00:22:42,654 --> 00:22:45,324
which I get,
'cause I lived with my mom until the end.
438
00:22:45,324 --> 00:22:46,408
Family is important.
439
00:22:46,408 --> 00:22:47,993
But I think all this meshuggaas
440
00:22:47,993 --> 00:22:50,245
might be a violation
of her parole. [chuckles]
441
00:22:50,245 --> 00:22:52,748
How the fuck--
442
00:22:52,748 --> 00:22:55,626
Uh, this cop I broke up with,
he ran the plates.
443
00:22:55,626 --> 00:22:57,211
Don't ask. Highway patrol.
444
00:22:57,211 --> 00:23:01,507
He also put a GPS tracking device
in my car 'cause he's kind of a stalker.
445
00:23:01,507 --> 00:23:04,635
So, this guy that you got--
This, um, Kachel?
446
00:23:05,636 --> 00:23:08,222
He told you he wants to buy this painting?
447
00:23:08,222 --> 00:23:10,057
- Oh, he wants it.
- He wants it.
448
00:23:10,057 --> 00:23:12,976
And he knows exactly what it is.
And I can get you the money.
449
00:23:12,976 --> 00:23:14,895
- She will. [chuckles]
- [Peggy] But if you stab me,
450
00:23:14,895 --> 00:23:18,398
or you cut my nipple off,
I don't see how that helps you.
451
00:23:18,398 --> 00:23:19,525
[breathes deeply]
452
00:23:21,151 --> 00:23:23,779
It helps me. [inhales]
453
00:23:23,779 --> 00:23:27,115
- It's okay, honey. It's okay. It's okay.
- [Heather breathes heavily]
454
00:23:28,534 --> 00:23:30,702
- [Peggy screams, groans]
- You're lying.
455
00:23:30,702 --> 00:23:34,623
No, no, no. I said there was competition.
He said he was gonna wire over a deposit.
456
00:23:34,623 --> 00:23:37,835
But I guess you'll never know.
So, A, you get no money,
457
00:23:37,835 --> 00:23:42,047
and two, Trooper Carl is about to do
a drive-by in about 20 minutes,
458
00:23:42,047 --> 00:23:44,550
judging from his past behavior.
459
00:23:44,550 --> 00:23:46,844
I don't know,
some girls find it flattering. [scoffs]
460
00:23:46,844 --> 00:23:48,971
We can find that GPS.
461
00:23:48,971 --> 00:23:51,223
Oh, good. Because I can't.
462
00:23:51,223 --> 00:23:54,768
I don't know. It's a chip, like,
the size of an eyelash or something.
463
00:23:54,768 --> 00:23:57,896
- What kind of deposit?
- [groans]
464
00:23:57,896 --> 00:24:01,316
250K. Okay?
465
00:24:02,067 --> 00:24:04,695
Two days. When he gets back from Florence.
466
00:24:04,695 --> 00:24:08,699
Very shitty Internet service.
Maybe three if he's running late.
467
00:24:10,909 --> 00:24:15,914
[grunting] Hey, you think
I could get that bag that I came for?
468
00:24:15,914 --> 00:24:16,832
[inhales sharply]
469
00:24:16,832 --> 00:24:20,002
[hammer banging]
470
00:24:22,629 --> 00:24:24,673
[Denny sighing]
471
00:24:29,303 --> 00:24:30,554
[Denny] Oh, hey.
472
00:24:32,264 --> 00:24:35,767
- That finger turn up anything?
- Nah, it's probably just another finger.
473
00:24:36,935 --> 00:24:39,938
Of course it turned up something.
I'm not telling you, though.
474
00:24:40,939 --> 00:24:45,068
{\an8}[chuckling] You're still marching around
in that thing? Who are you kidding?
475
00:24:45,068 --> 00:24:48,947
- I did a semester.
- You did three weeks of a summer session.
476
00:24:48,947 --> 00:24:51,408
Yeah, well, you know,
it's highly regarded.
477
00:24:51,408 --> 00:24:55,037
And it's good for my business
and it's good for my new clientele, okay?
478
00:24:56,330 --> 00:24:57,706
[Peggy chuckles]
479
00:24:58,498 --> 00:25:02,044
Can I get that catalog Bob sent
of Dona's artwork?
480
00:25:02,544 --> 00:25:05,881
Hey, did you know
she did Monet's "Waterloo Bridge"?
481
00:25:05,881 --> 00:25:07,424
Do you believe that?
482
00:25:07,966 --> 00:25:10,135
I looked it up. The ones in this series,
483
00:25:10,135 --> 00:25:12,930
they're all pulling in,
like, eight figures.
484
00:25:12,930 --> 00:25:15,390
Look at that freaking fog he did.
485
00:25:15,390 --> 00:25:18,435
Look at that freaking fog she did.
486
00:25:19,978 --> 00:25:23,190
Anyway, this is the reason
we all need to meditate.
487
00:25:23,732 --> 00:25:26,235
[inhales] Why do you want these?
488
00:25:26,235 --> 00:25:28,987
Is it for Kachel?
Don't tell me he's coming.
489
00:25:28,987 --> 00:25:31,281
[stammers] What is this?
A press conference?
490
00:25:31,281 --> 00:25:33,283
Come on, get back to the decorating.
491
00:25:35,327 --> 00:25:38,205
{\an8}- That's my blanket.
- It's cold out here.
492
00:25:38,205 --> 00:25:40,040
{\an8}You're not supposed to go
in the house, Denny.
493
00:25:40,040 --> 00:25:42,167
You're helping yourself to the linens now?
494
00:25:42,167 --> 00:25:45,963
Judy was shaking like a leaf. Okay?
495
00:25:47,464 --> 00:25:49,132
Okay. Later, Judy.
496
00:25:55,764 --> 00:25:56,849
[inhales deeply]
497
00:25:59,810 --> 00:26:00,978
[message sent whooshing]
498
00:26:01,728 --> 00:26:03,438
[sighs, inhales]
499
00:26:07,025 --> 00:26:08,569
[cell phone buzzing]
500
00:26:12,447 --> 00:26:16,159
- [Peggy] Well, look who it is. [sighs]
- And look who that is.
501
00:26:16,159 --> 00:26:19,288
Little Peggy Newman,
from Syosset, Long Island.
502
00:26:20,038 --> 00:26:21,331
What took you so long?
503
00:26:23,500 --> 00:26:24,793
Did you see the collection?
504
00:26:29,173 --> 00:26:30,174
Look.
505
00:26:30,674 --> 00:26:33,135
[laughing] Ah, holy shit.
506
00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:36,471
Jimmy, we both know,
the real one's never coming back.
507
00:26:36,471 --> 00:26:38,473
Why? As far as I'm concerned,
that is the real one.
508
00:26:38,473 --> 00:26:40,142
[Ethan] Okay, that is a good boy.
509
00:26:40,142 --> 00:26:42,561
- Easy. That's a good boy.
- [chuckles] Is that Ethan?
510
00:26:44,229 --> 00:26:46,440
[breathing heavily] Ethan?
511
00:26:47,232 --> 00:26:49,026
[Kachel stammers, sighs]
512
00:26:50,736 --> 00:26:53,030
[chuckles] So he's got a man bun now?
513
00:26:53,030 --> 00:26:54,656
[sighs] Yeah.
514
00:26:55,657 --> 00:26:58,452
- [sighs]
- I have to negotiate this in person.
515
00:26:58,994 --> 00:27:02,497
Well, hurry the fuck up.
People are getting chippy.
516
00:27:02,497 --> 00:27:05,042
- I'll send you my itinerary.
- [line beeps]
517
00:27:05,042 --> 00:27:06,710
- [through TV] With only two yards--
- Wait.
518
00:27:06,710 --> 00:27:08,253
- [television powers off]
- You got what?
519
00:27:08,253 --> 00:27:12,549
Blonde lady. Yea high.
I did it custom for your sister.
520
00:27:12,549 --> 00:27:14,885
So, when she says she found it
in her boyfriend's bed,
521
00:27:14,885 --> 00:27:17,137
I'm thinking, the fuck you talking about?
522
00:27:17,137 --> 00:27:18,096
Real fucking pale?
523
00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:19,890
[people at tanning spa moaning]
524
00:27:19,890 --> 00:27:25,062
- [chuckles] Sylvia Plath?
- I don't think that's her name.
525
00:27:25,062 --> 00:27:27,356
["She Drives Me Crazy" playing]
526
00:27:27,356 --> 00:27:31,610
- [entertainer moaning] Fuck.
- [Lionel Richie] Fuck, fuck, fuck.
527
00:27:31,610 --> 00:27:33,028
- [sighs] Fuck.
- [client 2] Fucking occupied.
528
00:27:33,028 --> 00:27:36,156
- [entertainer 2] Get the fuck outta here.
- [client 2] Right.
529
00:27:37,366 --> 00:27:38,492
[groans]
530
00:27:39,576 --> 00:27:41,537
- [pants unzip]
- [sighs]
531
00:27:41,537 --> 00:27:43,247
[urine splashing]
532
00:27:51,964 --> 00:27:53,382
- [door slamming]
- Leo?
533
00:28:00,180 --> 00:28:01,181
Hey, listen.
534
00:28:01,181 --> 00:28:04,351
I want you to go find
this Sylvia fucking Plath,
535
00:28:04,351 --> 00:28:05,769
or don't come back.
536
00:28:05,769 --> 00:28:07,855
[song continues]