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‎NETFLXI 原創喜劇系列

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‎（1554年：海盜高峰期）

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‎我的海盜藏寶圖…

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‎一定要埋藏好

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‎讓人在未來也不會發現

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‎那個車子不在路上行駛
‎而是在天空翱翔的未來

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‎海盜…

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‎與海盜一起埋下藏寶圖

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‎看她在演海盜

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‎莎拉伯恩斯在演海盜

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‎海盜

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‎完美

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‎一個放藏寶圖的完美地方

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‎現在就找個地方
‎給我這副老骨頭休息吧

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‎就坐在這裡，坐幾天幾夜

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‎讓我佈滿藤壺
‎滿是酒精的木腿休息

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‎（十億年後：現今）

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‎可憐小扎哈

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‎才剛起床、依然很睏

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‎宛如嬰兒、又累又躁

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‎可否給我一杯煩盡棄？

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‎晨早棕飲…

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‎快來喝杯晨早棕飲

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‎晨早棕飲…

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‎晨早棕飲是甚麼鬼啦？

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‎晨早棕飲最棒棒
‎一杯裝滿好方便

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‎加糖加奶、好好攪拌

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‎裡頭有豆、有熱有冰

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‎一天喝個三杯不過份

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‎晨早棕飲，還是不懂

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‎可不可以再多加解釋

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‎就咖啡啊，智障

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‎對喔

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‎晨早棕飲…

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‎扎哈，你幹嘛要晨早棕飲？

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‎我是愛睡小男孩，撐著眼皮

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‎昨晚實在睡不夠

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‎我需要喝杯晨早棕飲

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‎因為昨晚我在打炮

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‎打炮打足一整晚

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‎雞雞狂插一整晚

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‎操了床鋪、操了椅子

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‎像發情小狗一樣到處操

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‎老兄，我不想知道

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‎不過說來真巧，讓我說你聽聽

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‎昨晚我也在打炮

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‎天翻地覆操至黎明

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‎老子最愛打炮

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‎像動物似的操足一整晚

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‎兩位少騙，講事實

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‎昨晚我與你們在一起

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‎大家都有點餓餓

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‎所以煮菜吃飽飽

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‎菲力牛排，好吃到胃痛

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‎不過吃完還能操

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‎我們到處亂操，不止如此

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‎直接操到黎明破曉

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‎老子最愛就是一直操

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‎我向上帝祈禱，祈完再狠操他一頓

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‎我狂操速度快如風鑽

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‎狂操速度快如1990年代網絡駭客

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‎我慢慢操，操個一整晚

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‎用大雞雞，溫柔慢慢操

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‎老子昨晚，不快也不慢

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‎我有原則，我操得恰到好處

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‎我最愛這樣操

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‎還算可以，但我這樣操

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‎哇呢，我都這樣操

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‎老子打炮最愛呻吟

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‎一直叫東叫西

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‎老子打炮最愛說著

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‎圍過來，給爺趴下來

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‎老子打炮最愛唱歌

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‎-圍過來，給爺趴下來
‎-一直叫東叫西

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‎圍過來，給爺趴下來
‎一直叫東叫西

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‎晨早棕飲…

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‎美味晨早棕飲

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‎他們在講咖啡

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‎那個是誰？

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‎（今天單詞：寶藏）

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‎（布洛登）

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‎（扎哈）

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‎（馬克）

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‎我找到藏寶圖

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‎我要唸出第一條線索
‎然後一起去尋寶，好嗎？

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‎來囉

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‎若想找到我的寶藏
‎請好好運用這張藏寶圖與你的腦袋

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‎肌肉與筋肉可說美好
‎但連串妙語才是王者

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‎藏寶圖裡有一條隱藏的線索

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‎解開謎底，將富如休傑克曼

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‎像金鋼狼一樣有錢耶，太刺激了

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‎你們是在搞三小？

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‎你對我也太差勁！

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‎你跟你阿嬤自己開聖誕派對吧

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‎下禮拜的節目將會有
‎怪人奧爾揚科維奇

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‎在特別的新時段，晚上10點25分播放

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‎正正在球賽過後

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‎我愛馬克…

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‎扎哈，下次還是我來選曲了

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‎好啊

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‎-我愛馬克
‎-天啦

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‎我好期待找出那個寶藏

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‎你們拿到分成後打算幹嘛？

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‎我應該會買一艘帆船
‎揚帆出海、環遊世界

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‎我們把寶藏分成三份時
‎我就這麼做了

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‎扎哈里大大
‎我們應該只把寶藏分兩份

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‎那多出的寶藏可以據為己有

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‎聽起來不錯

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‎我也喜歡出海
‎我的好朋友扎哈，你呢？

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‎我嗎？我沒差啦

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‎友誼才是最重要的

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‎海盜的寶藏才是最重要的

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‎我們就讓布洛登當隻窮狗吧

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‎兩位，你們午餐想吃甚麼？

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‎或許吃個友誼義麵？

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‎馬克斯大大
‎不如我們把寶藏據為己有

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‎讓扎哈一貧如洗當隻窮狗

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‎可以考慮，不過我比較想吃友誼捲餅

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‎老兄，你那條訊息是想發給馬克吧

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‎不過讓他一貧如洗也好
‎你是想這樣吧？

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‎哇喔，只要有友誼炸玉米片就行了

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‎對喔，靠北，抱歉啦
‎我們來讓馬克一貧如洗吧

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‎好啊，要配上友好莎莎醬
‎還有善心酪梨醬

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‎老兄，你應該是要發給扎哈吧

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‎但如果你們想搞甚麼陰謀
‎我絕對要加入

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‎那我們快開始這頓墨西哥友誼大餐吧

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‎各位，抱歉了
‎還是開個群一起聊比較簡單

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‎正如剛才跟你們討論的
‎找到寶藏後再搞叛變

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‎肯定好玩

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‎好，午餐就吃這個吧

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‎打眼色

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‎打眼色

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‎-看手機
‎-蛤？

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‎-看手機
‎-打眼色

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‎今天的城中熱話
‎由鷹男披薩店贊助

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‎沒有外賣電話喔

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‎我是唐娜阿姨的布洛登凱利
‎人在荷里活大道街頭

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‎現在來訪問你
‎請問你最珍重的是甚麼？

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‎-家庭
‎-嗯

140
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‎我是唐娜阿姨的馬克
‎身邊的是祖絲琳

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‎我們正要問她，請問妳最珍重甚麼？

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‎-人生
‎-嗯

143
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‎妳最珍重甚麼？

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‎-我的孩子
‎嗯

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‎-今天實在非常高興…
‎-扎哈！

146
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‎-扎哈，嗨，在幹嘛？
‎-嗨

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‎-街頭民意調查
‎-嗨，各位

148
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‎-嗨
‎-甚麼是街頭民意調查？

149
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‎城中熱話，像新聞那樣

150
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‎你們幹嘛在做新聞？這是喜劇小品

151
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‎不過這集是講寶藏，老兄
‎所以我們在問大家最珍重甚麼

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‎別介意喔，但我們要讓節目回到正軌

153
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‎-好
‎-現在跑題了

154
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‎-是有點
‎-好吧

155
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‎艾德，你最珍重甚麼？

156
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‎趕快上…

157
00:07:36,914 --> 00:07:38,714
‎你是從艷舞店跑出來的嗎？

158
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‎媽的給我上車

159
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‎-好吧，他都罵髒話了
‎-真是的

160
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‎你們還自豪嗎？都被你們搞砸了

161
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‎難道你以為執行…

162
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‎-天啊
‎-抱歉

163
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‎-扎哈！
‎-抱歉

164
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‎你以為執行製作人都做這些嗎？

165
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‎我不太清楚…

166
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‎執行製作人是幹嘛的

167
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‎答案是錯的，知道嗎？

168
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‎執行製作人是去片場

169
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‎笑一笑，跟人握手

170
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‎不會去拯救那些擅離職守的演員

171
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‎我們只是覺得這樣蠻好玩
‎突破界限這樣

172
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‎說啥啊？我聽不到，馬克！

173
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‎馬克是想說對不起啦，是嗎？

174
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‎-你們喜歡吃薯條嗎？
‎-喜歡

175
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‎我可以一起去嗎？

176
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‎你在幹嘛啊？

177
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‎-我…
‎-妳怎麼進來的？

178
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‎-我不知道
‎-下車啊！

179
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‎下車！

180
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‎-買好了
‎-謝謝

181
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‎-開吃吧
‎-你人真好

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‎知道我在世上最珍重的是甚麼嗎？

183
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‎是甚麼？

184
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‎-你們
‎-我們？真的？

185
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‎-是啊
‎-不會吧

186
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‎是的，真的…

187
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‎我很珍惜你們的

188
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‎-謝謝
‎-還有…

189
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‎抱歉我剛才暴走了

190
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‎謝謝艾德，這番說話對我們意義深重

191
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‎抱歉，你說…
‎你剛才說我名名是甚麼？

192
00:09:05,086 --> 00:09:06,586
‎-艾德赫姆斯
‎-就艾德啊

193
00:09:07,088 --> 00:09:09,548
‎你們都以為我叫艾德？

194
00:09:09,632 --> 00:09:11,182
‎-是啊
‎-不然呢…

195
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‎艾德？

196
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‎如果你不叫艾德，那你叫甚麼？

197
00:09:14,262 --> 00:09:17,852
‎老兄，我叫阿蛋啊，阿蛋赫姆斯

198
00:09:19,934 --> 00:09:20,894
‎-阿蛋？
‎-阿蛋？

199
00:09:21,686 --> 00:09:24,106
‎對啊，你們都以為我名字叫艾德？

200
00:09:24,188 --> 00:09:25,768
‎-是啊
‎-對

201
00:09:27,608 --> 00:09:28,778
‎是阿蛋啊

202
00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:32,570
‎請熱烈歡迎，阿蛋赫姆斯

203
00:09:33,864 --> 00:09:34,824
‎可是…

204
00:09:35,408 --> 00:09:38,908
‎網路電影資料庫裡面
‎你的名字都是寫艾德的

205
00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:40,365
‎才沒有

206
00:09:40,454 --> 00:09:42,004
‎你去電影資料庫看看啊

207
00:09:42,081 --> 00:09:43,331
‎-你自己去看
‎-對啊

208
00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:45,956
‎你們是指控我不知道自己的名字嗎？

209
00:09:46,043 --> 00:09:47,883
‎-那真的…
‎-你們也太…

210
00:09:47,962 --> 00:09:50,052
‎你們也太…搞三小

211
00:09:51,507 --> 00:09:56,677
‎傑森，我發現一個天大的誤會

212
00:09:56,762 --> 00:09:59,772
‎我名字叫阿蛋啊！是阿蛋！

213
00:09:59,849 --> 00:10:03,019
‎-謝謝你請客…
‎-你們給我坐下

214
00:10:03,102 --> 00:10:06,232
‎我到底叫艾德，還是叫阿蛋？
‎我還以為自己叫阿蛋呢

215
00:10:06,314 --> 00:10:08,864
‎我都不知道自己是誰了

216
00:10:08,941 --> 00:10:10,321
‎我們去買一杯奶昔給你

217
00:10:10,901 --> 00:10:12,901
‎趕快跑吧

218
00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:18,656
‎我不知道自己是誰！

219
00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:26,793
‎寶藏…

220
00:10:27,293 --> 00:10:30,463
‎寶藏…有了！寶藏

221
00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:37,393
‎哈囉，你是馬克嗎？

222
00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:39,350
‎-我是馬克
‎-馬克，你好！

223
00:10:39,430 --> 00:10:42,520
‎-我叫阿森，他也叫阿森
‎-我們兩個都叫阿森

224
00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:45,100
‎-我們都來自南非
‎-來自南非

225
00:10:45,186 --> 00:10:46,396
‎都來自南非

226
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,439
‎-你們是尋寶獵人嗎？
‎-對，馬克！

227
00:10:48,522 --> 00:10:50,232
‎當然是尋寶獵人了！

228
00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:53,486
‎-看我們身上的繫帶啊
‎-我們有繫帶啊，馬克

229
00:10:53,569 --> 00:10:55,739
‎-我們會教你
‎-我們教你

230
00:10:55,863 --> 00:10:59,163
‎馬克，我們教你怎麼尋寶吧

231
00:10:59,950 --> 00:11:03,160
‎馬克，這是尋寶第一課

232
00:11:03,245 --> 00:11:06,285
‎-第一課要學甚麼
‎-第一課就是答案

233
00:11:06,374 --> 00:11:08,134
‎-甚麼是寶藏
‎-馬克，甚麼是寶藏？

234
00:11:08,209 --> 00:11:09,669
‎馬克，你說，甚麼是寶藏？

235
00:11:09,752 --> 00:11:12,302
‎-馬克，你說吧
‎-甚麼是寶藏

236
00:11:12,380 --> 00:11:15,760
‎-我不知道，應該…
‎-這不是甚麼複雜的問題

237
00:11:15,841 --> 00:11:18,801
‎答案淺顯而懂
‎我要知道你清楚答案是甚麼

238
00:11:18,886 --> 00:11:20,596
‎是海盜的黃金嗎？

239
00:11:21,764 --> 00:11:23,974
‎馬克，傻孩子

240
00:11:24,058 --> 00:11:26,308
‎傻馬克，你大錯特錯了

241
00:11:26,394 --> 00:11:28,484
‎-馬克，你真是大錯特錯
‎-完全錯誤啊

242
00:11:28,562 --> 00:11:30,402
‎大錯特錯了，馬克

243
00:11:30,481 --> 00:11:32,941
‎這孩子根本不懂，讓我去教教他

244
00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:37,069
‎馬克，我有個秘密
‎其實我不是從南非來的

245
00:11:37,154 --> 00:11:38,994
‎-甚麼？
‎-我來自紐西蘭的

246
00:11:39,073 --> 00:11:42,453
‎我20年來都用那個蠢死的口音

247
00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:45,495
‎天啊，終於可以用回真正的口音

248
00:11:45,579 --> 00:11:46,869
‎而不是那個蠢口音

249
00:11:46,956 --> 00:11:48,536
‎阿森，你教懂他了沒？

250
00:11:49,333 --> 00:11:50,793
‎我教過他了

251
00:11:50,876 --> 00:11:52,996
‎希望有獵豹找上門之前，他會學懂吧

252
00:11:53,838 --> 00:11:56,378
‎-獵豹會來抓你喔，馬克
‎-太糟了，又快又邪惡

253
00:11:56,465 --> 00:11:59,175
‎-馬克，有看《第九禁區》嗎？
‎-馬克，有看《第九禁區》嗎？

254
00:11:59,260 --> 00:12:01,140
‎-尼爾·布洛姆坎普拍那部
‎-有看過嗎？

255
00:12:01,220 --> 00:12:02,760
‎-講大蝦的，馬克
‎-超強的

256
00:12:02,847 --> 00:12:04,307
‎-超強大蝦
‎-不是普通小蝦

257
00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:07,440
‎不像那些小蝦游來游去

258
00:12:07,518 --> 00:12:08,558
‎這些大蝦喔

259
00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:13,266
‎-這些跟寶藏有甚麼關係？
‎-大有關係了

260
00:12:13,357 --> 00:12:14,687
‎-跟寶藏有何關係？

261
00:12:14,775 --> 00:12:16,855
‎這傢伙真需要好好學…

262
00:12:16,944 --> 00:12:19,784
‎聽我說，我來自蘇格蘭
‎不是來自南非

263
00:12:19,864 --> 00:12:21,574
‎那個傢伙都以為我來自南非…

264
00:12:21,657 --> 00:12:24,367
‎他們到底在竊竊私語講甚麼？

265
00:12:24,452 --> 00:12:26,832
‎看在老天爺份上，求你幫我了

266
00:12:26,912 --> 00:12:30,462
‎-你到底…
‎-我都跟他說好了，馬克

267
00:12:30,541 --> 00:12:32,421
‎你別再說話了，我們要尋寶

268
00:12:32,501 --> 00:12:34,921
‎-天啊！
‎-寶藏耶！

269
00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:36,514
‎天啊，甚麼來著？

270
00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:39,679
‎馬克，這是史上最珍貴的寶藏

271
00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:42,089
‎-《第九禁區》
‎-真要命啊

272
00:12:42,178 --> 00:12:47,478
‎-這是藍光版的《第九禁區》
‎-居然埋在你家後花園了

273
00:12:47,558 --> 00:12:50,228
‎這片《第九禁區》你就留著吧，馬克

274
00:12:50,311 --> 00:12:51,521
‎不過我們離開前

275
00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:54,154
‎你有事情要跟我們說嗎，馬克？

276
00:12:54,231 --> 00:12:56,821
‎對，馬克，你有話要跟我們說嗎？

277
00:12:57,234 --> 00:12:59,494
‎兩位，或許是時候跟對方坦誠了

278
00:12:59,570 --> 00:13:04,530
‎說出你真正的來歷，不論是南非與否

279
00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:06,287
‎你們都來自南非嗎？

280
00:13:06,368 --> 00:13:08,448
‎我們當然來自南非了，廢物

281
00:13:08,537 --> 00:13:10,327
‎我們都來自南非啊，智障

282
00:13:10,414 --> 00:13:11,464
‎我們走吧

283
00:13:11,540 --> 00:13:14,420
‎-再見了，馬克
‎-馬克，我要飛回去澳洲珀斯了

284
00:13:14,502 --> 00:13:16,132
‎-天啊
‎-我們會飛

285
00:13:16,212 --> 00:13:19,472
‎-馬克，我們會飛喔
‎-我們從《超人》那裡學的

286
00:13:23,093 --> 00:13:26,103
‎馬克博南諾，你在幹嘛？

287
00:13:26,180 --> 00:13:29,520
‎一針見血
‎我在列出可能埋有寶藏的地方

288
00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:31,100
‎一針見血呢

289
00:13:31,185 --> 00:13:33,395
‎-噢…一針見血
‎-一針見血

290
00:13:33,479 --> 00:13:35,189
‎我正要喝杯茶，休休息

291
00:13:35,272 --> 00:13:37,902
‎噢…一針見血呢，我最愛茶了

292
00:13:37,983 --> 00:13:39,323
‎一針見血

293
00:13:39,401 --> 00:13:41,781
‎一針見血，非常好

294
00:13:41,862 --> 00:13:44,492
‎一針見血耶

295
00:13:44,573 --> 00:13:47,163
‎你們到底知不知道甚麼叫“一針見血”

296
00:13:49,870 --> 00:13:50,830
‎不知道

297
00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:52,333
‎-一針見血
‎-一針見血

298
00:13:52,414 --> 00:13:53,424
‎-一針見血
‎-一針見血

299
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:55,420
‎喂？

300
00:13:55,501 --> 00:13:57,801
‎-喂，請問是扎哈里嗎？
‎-是的

301
00:13:57,878 --> 00:13:59,708
‎你好嗎，扎哈里？

302
00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:05,137
‎好，我只是在找些寶藏
‎吃些雞肉，諸如此類啦…

303
00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:08,509
‎不錯耶，扎哈，你知道我是誰嗎？

304
00:14:08,597 --> 00:14:11,017
‎泰倫斯馬利克嗎？

305
00:14:11,100 --> 00:14:14,400
‎不，扎哈里
‎我不是好評如潮的導影泰倫斯馬利克

306
00:14:14,979 --> 00:14:16,939
‎-扎哈…
‎-是的

307
00:14:17,022 --> 00:14:19,942
‎我是艾倫狄珍妮

308
00:14:20,025 --> 00:14:22,855
‎天啊！艾倫·狄珍妮！

309
00:14:22,945 --> 00:14:26,025
‎對，扎哈
‎我們收到來自你好朋友馬克的信

310
00:14:26,115 --> 00:14:27,775
‎他說你目前負債呢

311
00:14:27,867 --> 00:14:30,367
‎對欠債一萬元

312
00:14:30,452 --> 00:14:33,162
‎雪上加霜的是，你的車還壞了

313
00:14:33,247 --> 00:14:35,997
‎對，的確是雪上加霜

314
00:14:36,083 --> 00:14:37,843
‎也太慘了吧，扎哈里

315
00:14:37,918 --> 00:14:38,918
‎是的

316
00:14:39,753 --> 00:14:40,803
‎我們想幫你

317
00:14:42,506 --> 00:14:44,466
‎請你走到前門

318
00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:46,724
‎你都做了甚麼？

319
00:14:46,802 --> 00:14:50,222
‎不好說，我只想你走到前門
‎並把前門打開

320
00:14:50,306 --> 00:14:51,846
‎你做了甚麼？

321
00:14:51,932 --> 00:14:55,102
‎不好說，我只想你走到前門
‎並把前門打開

322
00:14:55,185 --> 00:14:58,725
‎好，我走到我前門，看門外有甚麼吧

323
00:14:58,814 --> 00:15:01,234
‎不過…天啊！

324
00:15:01,317 --> 00:15:05,817
‎-怎麼了，扎哈？
‎-是全新的豐田卡羅拉

325
00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:10,365
‎對，全新的豐田卡羅拉
‎全靠豐田汽車城令伍特的民眾

326
00:15:10,451 --> 00:15:13,161
‎-天啊！
‎-坐進去看怎麼樣

327
00:15:13,245 --> 00:15:15,405
‎-空間好大喔！
‎-汽車空間夠大

328
00:15:15,497 --> 00:15:17,327
‎不如你打開手套箱看一看？

329
00:15:17,416 --> 00:15:18,666
‎天啊

330
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:20,841
‎-有甚麼，扎哈？
‎-天啊！

331
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:23,800
‎-扎哈？
‎-是一萬元現金啊！

332
00:15:23,881 --> 00:15:25,511
‎一萬元現金

333
00:15:25,591 --> 00:15:29,391
‎全靠多力多滋的廠商
‎美味可口，記得配起司

334
00:15:29,470 --> 00:15:31,810
‎-車裡有其他人嗎？
‎-應該沒有

335
00:15:31,889 --> 00:15:33,099
‎我去看…天啊！

336
00:15:33,182 --> 00:15:36,022
‎-是誰啦，扎哈？
‎-是我失蹤多年的父親！

337
00:15:36,101 --> 00:15:37,941
‎對，他從戰爭回來了

338
00:15:38,020 --> 00:15:40,110
‎噢，我好想你啊，爸爸！

339
00:15:40,189 --> 00:15:43,529
‎-好好抱著他吧，扎哈里
‎-爸爸，我好想你啊！

340
00:15:43,609 --> 00:15:46,699
‎-感覺如何？
‎-感覺有點陌生

341
00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:49,109
‎-為甚麼？
‎-他背後貼著一塊東西

342
00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:51,618
‎-甚麼東西？
‎-天啊！

343
00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:54,240
‎那比我失蹤多年的父親還要好！

344
00:15:54,328 --> 00:15:57,368
‎-是甚麼了，扎哈？
‎-是全新的三星平板啊！

345
00:15:57,456 --> 00:15:58,956
‎對，平板上都播著甚麼？

346
00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:01,171
‎泰國的美景！

347
00:16:01,251 --> 00:16:02,251
‎-我告訴你，扎哈
‎-嗯？

348
00:16:02,336 --> 00:16:04,836
‎-你已經身處泰國了
‎-天啊！

349
00:16:04,922 --> 00:16:09,132
‎-沒錯了，告訴我，你看到甚麼？
‎-《24反恐任務》的艾莉莎姬芙拔

350
00:16:09,218 --> 00:16:11,968
‎她騎在大象上面耶，場面太壯觀了！

351
00:16:12,054 --> 00:16:15,064
‎對，艾莉莎姬芙拔有給你甚麼嗎？

352
00:16:15,140 --> 00:16:16,810
‎-天啊！
‎-怎麼了，扎哈

353
00:16:16,892 --> 00:16:20,652
‎她給我20塊的現金卷
‎可以用來買保羅紐曼食品的沙拉醬

354
00:16:20,729 --> 00:16:22,479
‎感謝保羅紐曼食品

355
00:16:22,564 --> 00:16:24,784
‎好，你現在把現金卷拿到附近的超市

356
00:16:24,858 --> 00:16:27,528
‎-好，我到了
‎-好，收銀的是誰？

357
00:16:27,611 --> 00:16:29,611
‎-天啊！
‎-是誰了，扎哈？

358
00:16:29,697 --> 00:16:31,407
‎是保羅紐曼，他起死回生了

359
00:16:31,490 --> 00:16:32,990
‎-沒錯
‎-我超喜歡你配音的

360
00:16:33,075 --> 00:16:33,985
‎《汽車總動員》

361
00:16:34,076 --> 00:16:36,536
‎-把現金卷交給保羅紐曼吧
‎-好的

362
00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:39,750
‎-他給你甚麼了
‎-他給我一個小小的絲絨袋

363
00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:42,252
‎-裡面有甚麼，扎哈？
‎-是藍寶石！

364
00:16:42,334 --> 00:16:44,004
‎不，那些是血鑽，扎哈里

365
00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:46,206
‎你現在把它們帶到柬埔寨邊境

366
00:16:46,296 --> 00:16:47,716
‎去鑽石城賭場大酒店

367
00:16:48,507 --> 00:16:50,217
‎-好
‎-為避過邊境檢查

368
00:16:50,300 --> 00:16:54,050
‎你需要把那些血鑽
‎深深藏在你的屁眼裡

369
00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:58,231
‎-好，我照辦了
‎-做得好，那進賭場吧

370
00:16:58,308 --> 00:16:59,978
‎-從逃生梯出去
‎-天啊！

371
00:17:00,060 --> 00:17:02,560
‎-是甚麼了，扎哈？
‎-是一台黑色的運動型多用途車

372
00:17:02,646 --> 00:17:04,766
‎那不是給你的
‎那是往賭場的交通工具

373
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:05,897
‎-好吧
‎-坐上去了嗎？

374
00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:07,323
‎-好
‎-看看後視鏡，扎哈

375
00:17:07,401 --> 00:17:10,401
‎-有人跟蹤你嗎？
‎-有，一輛1974年的福特野馬

376
00:17:10,487 --> 00:17:11,777
‎接下來很重要，扎哈

377
00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:14,244
‎福特野馬上的司機
‎左邊臉上有疤痕嗎？

378
00:17:14,324 --> 00:17:15,204
‎-有
‎-媽的，慘了

379
00:17:15,284 --> 00:17:16,374
‎不過看起來好酷喔

380
00:17:16,452 --> 00:17:18,292
‎扎哈，打開手套箱

381
00:17:18,370 --> 00:17:20,210
‎-天啊！
‎-有甚麼，扎哈？

382
00:17:20,289 --> 00:17:21,329
‎-天啊！
‎-扎哈？

383
00:17:21,415 --> 00:17:26,205
‎是19毫米的華瑟P99
‎德國半自動手槍！

384
00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:29,625
‎-開槍殺那個司機
‎-可是我沒有殺過人啊

385
00:17:29,715 --> 00:17:31,425
‎-你相信我嗎？
‎-我好怕啊，艾倫

386
00:17:31,508 --> 00:17:32,798
‎-你相信我嗎？
‎-我相信你

387
00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:36,055
‎日間電視名流，艾倫狄珍妮！

388
00:17:36,138 --> 00:17:37,138
‎開槍，趕快

389
00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:40,766
‎扎哈！

390
00:17:41,810 --> 00:17:44,270
‎-我殺死他了
‎-做得好，扎哈，冷靜點

391
00:17:44,354 --> 00:17:45,904
‎-他死了！
‎-你到賭場了嗎？

392
00:17:45,981 --> 00:17:48,441
‎-我手上沾有他的血了！
‎-去輪盤桌

393
00:17:48,525 --> 00:17:50,815
‎-我不會忘記他的眼神！
‎-拿起血鑽

394
00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:52,243
‎買34號紅色

395
00:17:52,321 --> 00:17:54,031
‎-天啊！
‎-怎麼樣，扎哈？

396
00:17:54,114 --> 00:17:55,534
‎-我贏了！
‎-獎品是甚麼？

397
00:17:55,616 --> 00:17:57,906
‎是充滿魔法力量的藍色球

398
00:17:57,993 --> 00:18:00,123
‎謝謝充滿魔法力量的藍色球體！

399
00:18:00,204 --> 00:18:02,374
‎-踏進去吧，扎哈
‎-我要踏進球體了，艾倫

400
00:18:02,456 --> 00:18:05,916
‎-你看到甚麼？
‎-我看到第二輛豐田卡羅拉

401
00:18:06,001 --> 00:18:08,001
‎第二輛豐田卡羅拉！上車吧

402
00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:09,247
‎-天啊！
‎-怎麼了？

403
00:18:09,338 --> 00:18:10,628
‎-飛上天了！
‎-沒錯！

404
00:18:10,714 --> 00:18:13,804
‎豐田卡羅拉飛上天了！

405
00:18:13,884 --> 00:18:15,934
‎說說你在雲霧裡看到甚麼？

406
00:18:16,011 --> 00:18:18,681
‎我看到一個蟲洞，一個漩渦！

407
00:18:18,764 --> 00:18:21,984
‎穿越蟲洞吧，扎哈里！

408
00:18:22,059 --> 00:18:24,559
‎我正穿越蟲洞了，艾倫！

409
00:18:24,645 --> 00:18:25,975
‎你又看到甚麼？

410
00:18:26,063 --> 00:18:28,523
‎我…看透一切

411
00:18:28,607 --> 00:18:32,947
‎-沒錯！
‎-我看遍宇宙裡每一個角落

412
00:18:33,028 --> 00:18:36,278
‎我看到起始與終結

413
00:18:36,365 --> 00:18:40,155
‎看到我的肉身掉下

414
00:18:40,244 --> 00:18:43,624
‎我不再是平凡之人

415
00:18:43,705 --> 00:18:48,035
‎大家可以稱我為上帝！

416
00:18:48,127 --> 00:18:49,747
‎你還看到甚麼？

417
00:18:49,837 --> 00:18:52,167
‎我看到第三輛豐田卡羅拉！

418
00:18:52,256 --> 00:18:56,586
‎第三輛…豐田卡羅拉！

419
00:18:56,677 --> 00:18:57,927
‎第三輛…

420
00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:04,599
‎然後我踏進了一個
‎充滿魔法的藍色球體

421
00:19:04,685 --> 00:19:06,765
‎然後穿越時空

422
00:19:06,854 --> 00:19:08,524
‎所以我全身變藍了

423
00:19:08,605 --> 00:19:11,685
‎-無聊死了
‎-真無聊，可是扎哈都變神了

424
00:19:11,775 --> 00:19:13,735
‎如果他是神，他變出甚麼都行啊

425
00:19:13,819 --> 00:19:16,319
‎那我們就不用再尋寶了

426
00:19:16,405 --> 00:19:17,485
‎現在怎麼樣？

427
00:19:20,576 --> 00:19:22,576
‎自由時間！

428
00:19:23,787 --> 00:19:25,787
‎-自由時間！
‎-自由時間！

429
00:19:25,873 --> 00:19:27,883
‎-自由時間！
‎-出去吧！

430
00:19:27,958 --> 00:19:29,958
‎自由了！萬歲！

431
00:19:30,043 --> 00:19:32,053
‎-自由時間！
‎-自由時間啊！

432
00:19:32,129 --> 00:19:34,089
‎-自由時間！
‎-自由時間！

433
00:19:34,173 --> 00:19:36,593
‎自由時間！

434
00:19:36,675 --> 00:19:38,755
‎-自由時間！
‎-自由時間！

435
00:19:38,844 --> 00:19:40,014
‎自由時間！

436
00:19:40,095 --> 00:19:41,845
‎-自由時間！
‎-自由時間！

437
00:19:45,893 --> 00:19:47,983
‎-自由時間！
‎-自由時間！

438
00:19:48,061 --> 00:19:49,311
‎爽啊

439
00:19:51,565 --> 00:19:54,225
‎-我最愛自由時間！
‎-球球萬歲！

440
00:19:54,902 --> 00:19:57,322
‎不不不…

441
00:19:58,197 --> 00:19:59,527
‎不許有自由時間！

442
00:19:59,615 --> 00:20:00,615
‎別這樣吧，阿蛋

443
00:20:00,699 --> 00:20:02,159
‎把球給我

444
00:20:02,242 --> 00:20:03,702
‎把球給我！

445
00:20:04,119 --> 00:20:07,409
‎-阿蛋…
‎-不許玩球

446
00:20:07,497 --> 00:20:11,167
‎你們要把這集拍完！

447
00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:21,682
‎慘了，警察來了

448
00:20:21,762 --> 00:20:25,432
‎先生，不好意思
‎你最好有球類運動許可申請

449
00:20:25,515 --> 00:20:27,675
‎拜託，警察，怎麼總是要破壞樂趣？

450
00:20:27,768 --> 00:20:29,058
‎來一起玩就算吧

451
00:20:29,144 --> 00:20:30,694
‎一起玩？那可不行啊！

452
00:20:30,771 --> 00:20:33,731
‎我們是警察！
‎你們有看過《警察》真人秀嗎？

453
00:20:34,399 --> 00:20:36,189
‎如果沒有呢，基本上就是警察…

454
00:20:39,196 --> 00:20:41,026
‎-準備發球
‎-收到

455
00:20:44,826 --> 00:20:45,736
‎天啦！

456
00:20:58,465 --> 00:20:59,545
‎亞伯拉罕林肯啊

457
00:21:01,843 --> 00:21:04,973
‎總統親身來到，讓這裡氣氛急轉了

458
00:21:05,055 --> 00:21:06,265
‎-布洛登
‎-是的

459
00:21:06,348 --> 00:21:07,638
‎接球吧

460
00:21:11,353 --> 00:21:13,733
‎-沒事，我去撿
‎-好

461
00:21:15,107 --> 00:21:16,477
‎天啊！

462
00:21:16,566 --> 00:21:17,566
‎怎麼了，扎哈？

463
00:21:17,651 --> 00:21:19,951
‎我好像找到海盜寶藏了

464
00:21:20,028 --> 00:21:21,778
‎-哇喔！
‎-天啦…

465
00:21:31,290 --> 00:21:33,290
‎恭喜你們

466
00:21:33,667 --> 00:21:34,957
‎沒想到你們能找到

467
00:21:35,419 --> 00:21:38,709
‎不過你們證明我錯了
‎就如休傑克曼一樣

468
00:21:39,464 --> 00:21:42,724
‎他讓我意識到
‎他不止是個充滿男子氣概的金鋼狼

469
00:21:42,801 --> 00:21:46,351
‎他巡演的時候還能載歌載舞

470
00:21:46,430 --> 00:21:49,520
‎恭喜你們，唐娜阿姨
‎寶藏就歸你們了

471
00:21:50,434 --> 00:21:52,774
‎-天啦！
‎-哇呢！

472
00:21:52,853 --> 00:21:54,903
‎我們是億萬富翁了！

473
00:21:54,980 --> 00:21:56,730
‎恭喜啊！

474
00:21:58,233 --> 00:22:02,403
‎哇，實在太感謝這位海盜

475
00:22:02,487 --> 00:22:06,197
‎我想多謝各位
‎當然不少得唐娜阿姨的各位

476
00:22:06,283 --> 00:22:09,663
‎亞伯拉罕林肯，你是必不可少的

477
00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:13,535
‎還有感謝兩位警察，謝謝

478
00:22:15,417 --> 00:22:18,417
‎-好，多謝各位
‎-晚安了，各位

479
00:22:18,503 --> 00:22:19,423
‎唐娜阿姨

480
00:22:19,504 --> 00:22:21,424
‎唐娜阿姨的歡樂老屋

481
00:22:21,506 --> 00:22:23,376
‎希望大家都愛第一季

482
00:22:23,467 --> 00:22:25,257
‎不愛請滾，死人渣

483
00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:26,934
‎開玩笑的，請繼續看

484
00:22:27,012 --> 00:22:28,762
‎本集找到藏寶圖

485
00:22:28,847 --> 00:22:30,677
‎阿蛋生氣，阿森飛起

486
00:22:30,766 --> 00:22:32,556
‎贏下三輛車，與警察打球

487
00:22:32,642 --> 00:22:34,442
‎還見了亞伯拉罕林肯，亂七八糟

488
00:22:35,604 --> 00:22:36,444
‎亂七八糟

489
00:22:37,522 --> 00:22:38,572
‎亂七八糟

490
00:22:39,524 --> 00:22:40,444
‎亂七八糟

491
00:22:40,525 --> 00:22:42,435
‎遇見亞伯拉罕林肯，亂七八糟

492
00:22:43,528 --> 00:22:44,358
‎亂七八糟

493
00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:46,157
‎亂七八糟

494
00:22:46,823 --> 00:22:47,703
‎亂七八糟

495
00:22:47,783 --> 00:22:49,453
‎-遇見亞伯拉罕林肯
‎-唐娜阿姨

496
00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:53,460
‎好好看、繼續看

497
00:22:53,914 --> 00:22:57,254
‎-好好看、繼續看
‎-唐娜

498
00:22:57,626 --> 00:23:01,456
‎-好好看、繼續看
‎-阿姨

499
00:23:01,546 --> 00:23:05,376
‎字幕翻譯：李瑋樂