1
00:00:53,428 --> 00:00:55,055
[footsteps]
2
00:00:55,639 --> 00:00:58,225
- [wind blows]
- [electricity hums]
3
00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:02,187
[Noah imitating Eli]
I can't take much more of this.
4
00:01:04,605 --> 00:01:06,275
I can't take much more of this.
5
00:01:09,486 --> 00:01:11,238
I can't take much more of this.
6
00:01:13,782 --> 00:01:15,617
[on phone] I can't take much more of this.
7
00:01:18,954 --> 00:01:20,873
I can't take much more of this.
8
00:01:23,876 --> 00:01:25,752
I can't take much more of this.
9
00:01:27,004 --> 00:01:28,212
Damn.
10
00:01:28,213 --> 00:01:30,548
The kid sounds exactly like you.
11
00:01:30,549 --> 00:01:32,759
Yeah, I'm well aware.
12
00:01:35,179 --> 00:01:41,976
So he's an unstable, artistic genius
who is full of rage and fear, speaks Dutch
13
00:01:41,977 --> 00:01:44,896
and does a spot-on Eli impersonation.
14
00:01:44,897 --> 00:01:47,524
What else? Has he cut off his ear yet?
15
00:01:49,026 --> 00:01:51,235
Well, what do you think is going on?
16
00:01:51,236 --> 00:01:52,988
I don't have a fucking clue.
17
00:01:54,031 --> 00:01:56,157
I don't know. Maybe I'm reading
too much into all of this.
18
00:01:56,158 --> 00:01:58,076
I just feel there's something here
I'm missing.
19
00:01:58,660 --> 00:02:00,995
Some sort of message.
I mean, he acts like he knows me,
20
00:02:00,996 --> 00:02:02,872
like he knows something about me.
21
00:02:02,873 --> 00:02:03,957
Sure.
22
00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:05,959
Like a message from Lynn.
23
00:02:08,211 --> 00:02:10,506
- That's not what I mean.
- [Jackson] Why not?
24
00:02:11,298 --> 00:02:14,550
Your wife dies, it only makes sense
that you would look
25
00:02:14,551 --> 00:02:17,679
- for some kind of message from her.
- That has nothing to do with this.
26
00:02:18,180 --> 00:02:19,681
This is a very sick kid,
27
00:02:20,265 --> 00:02:22,433
and I'm looking
for a scientific explanation
28
00:02:22,434 --> 00:02:23,976
for what's going on here, Jackson.
29
00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:26,354
Something with some sort of basis in fact.
30
00:02:26,355 --> 00:02:27,980
Not everything is based in fact.
31
00:02:27,981 --> 00:02:29,608
Just the things that are real.
32
00:02:30,442 --> 00:02:35,029
You know, Lynn used to always say
your blinders were both your main strength
33
00:02:35,030 --> 00:02:36,740
and your main weakness.
34
00:02:38,242 --> 00:02:39,367
When?
35
00:02:39,368 --> 00:02:40,451
[Jackson] When what?
36
00:02:40,452 --> 00:02:42,037
When did she say that about me?
37
00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,414
All the time, man.
38
00:02:45,082 --> 00:02:46,291
All the time.
39
00:02:48,252 --> 00:02:49,670
[stammers] What?
40
00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:53,882
- Hey, hey, hey, listen--
- No... Nothing to do with you.
41
00:02:56,426 --> 00:02:57,803
I just fucking miss her.
42
00:02:59,763 --> 00:03:00,764
[sighs]
43
00:03:03,225 --> 00:03:04,226
[softly] I know.
44
00:03:05,561 --> 00:03:07,855
["I'm Lookin' Out the Window" playing]
45
00:03:36,008 --> 00:03:37,342
[clattering in distance]
46
00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:55,776
[music fades]
47
00:03:55,777 --> 00:03:57,028
[Larry panting]
48
00:03:57,029 --> 00:03:58,238
Larry?
49
00:04:00,157 --> 00:04:01,200
What is it, boy?
50
00:04:05,787 --> 00:04:07,706
[Larry's footsteps descend]
51
00:04:14,421 --> 00:04:15,797
[exhales heavily]
52
00:04:27,351 --> 00:04:30,020
[faucet dripping]
53
00:04:34,233 --> 00:04:36,443
[wind whistling]
54
00:04:48,205 --> 00:04:49,873
[dripping continues]
55
00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:02,094
[window closes]
56
00:05:11,353 --> 00:05:13,397
- [sighs]
- [door creaks]
57
00:05:19,194 --> 00:05:22,947
[Denise] Okay, let's get you
and teddy all snuggled up.
58
00:05:22,948 --> 00:05:25,241
[inhales deeply, breathes shakily]
59
00:05:25,242 --> 00:05:26,577
Are you okay?
60
00:05:27,661 --> 00:05:29,121
Oh, my goodness.
61
00:05:29,621 --> 00:05:31,206
You're shivering.
62
00:05:31,707 --> 00:05:33,833
[breathes shakily]
63
00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:36,253
It's okay.
You're gonna be okay. All right?
64
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:40,591
You get a good sleep, and I will see you
first thing in the morning.
65
00:05:42,384 --> 00:05:43,427
[kisses]
66
00:05:48,265 --> 00:05:50,267
Why did they do tests to me?
67
00:05:52,144 --> 00:05:55,355
Well, to make sure that you're okay,
which you are.
68
00:05:56,481 --> 00:05:59,151
We just need to figure some stuff out,
which we will.
69
00:06:01,778 --> 00:06:06,200
Hey, how about a lullaby before I go?
70
00:06:11,288 --> 00:06:13,916
[whispers] Come on. Let's cuddle-wuddle.
71
00:06:16,835 --> 00:06:19,880
Here we go. Here we go.
72
00:06:21,423 --> 00:06:22,882
[sighs]
73
00:06:22,883 --> 00:06:28,847
♪ You are my sunshine ♪
74
00:06:29,681 --> 00:06:32,309
♪ My only sunshine ♪
75
00:06:33,268 --> 00:06:38,690
♪ You make me happy
When skies are gray ♪
76
00:06:40,234 --> 00:06:46,406
♪ You'll never know, dear
How much I love you ♪
77
00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:52,621
♪ Please don't take my sunshine away ♪
78
00:07:15,102 --> 00:07:17,771
[inhales deeply] Hmm.
79
00:07:32,661 --> 00:07:33,996
[sighs]
80
00:07:51,513 --> 00:07:53,807
[inhales deeply] Hmm.
81
00:08:00,898 --> 00:08:06,320
[pen clicking]
82
00:08:12,159 --> 00:08:14,285
- [screams]
- [giggles]
83
00:08:14,286 --> 00:08:15,412
[gasps, grunts]
84
00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:19,041
[sighs]
85
00:08:32,346 --> 00:08:34,097
[sighs]
86
00:08:38,894 --> 00:08:39,977
[exhales sharply]
87
00:08:53,075 --> 00:08:55,202
[faucet running]
88
00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:04,461
[sighs deeply]
89
00:09:23,355 --> 00:09:24,690
[grunts]
90
00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:29,027
[grunting]
91
00:09:35,659 --> 00:09:37,369
[gasps, screams]
92
00:09:37,870 --> 00:09:40,038
- [breathes heavily]
- [Larry panting]
93
00:09:40,998 --> 00:09:46,085
It's like I'm experiencing some extreme
case of transference-countertransference.
94
00:09:46,086 --> 00:09:48,629
It's, like...
it's, like, bleeding into my dreams.
95
00:09:48,630 --> 00:09:51,257
- [therapist] So you're not sleeping well.
- You're missing my point.
96
00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:54,136
Your point is that this Noah case
is an exceptional one.
97
00:09:54,636 --> 00:09:56,722
A unique riddle to be solved.
98
00:09:57,556 --> 00:09:59,390
Except I thought you'd retired.
99
00:09:59,391 --> 00:10:01,851
Last time you were here,
you were talking about retiring.
100
00:10:01,852 --> 00:10:03,060
Oh, I am.
101
00:10:03,061 --> 00:10:04,605
I'm handing over my cases.
102
00:10:05,314 --> 00:10:07,733
I just want to do this one last one
and then I'm out.
103
00:10:08,233 --> 00:10:09,984
[chuckles] Like a bank robber.
104
00:10:09,985 --> 00:10:12,905
- [therapist chuckles] Last big score.
- Yeah.
105
00:10:13,739 --> 00:10:16,490
- [sighs] One last shot.
- [therapist] Mmm.
106
00:10:16,491 --> 00:10:19,994
In cases with this level of transference
between doctor and patient,
107
00:10:19,995 --> 00:10:23,039
isn't it standard
to refer the patient to someone else?
108
00:10:23,040 --> 00:10:24,833
Well, yeah. Uh, typically, yeah.
109
00:10:25,667 --> 00:10:27,211
But this case is unique,
110
00:10:27,711 --> 00:10:31,422
and I think it might actually be negligent
for me not to continue with it.
111
00:10:31,423 --> 00:10:32,590
[therapist] Okay.
112
00:10:32,591 --> 00:10:36,552
Or what looks like a highly unusual case
113
00:10:36,553 --> 00:10:41,599
might be your mind painting it as
something more unique than it actually is
114
00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:45,187
as a way to stay in this state of denial.
115
00:10:45,687 --> 00:10:47,105
Denial about what?
116
00:10:50,484 --> 00:10:51,485
Kidding.
117
00:10:53,820 --> 00:10:56,030
Eli, I really want to help you.
118
00:10:56,031 --> 00:10:58,115
But in order for me to do that,
sooner or later
119
00:10:58,116 --> 00:11:00,953
you're gonna have to start talking
to me about Lynn.
120
00:11:04,915 --> 00:11:05,916
I know.
121
00:11:08,252 --> 00:11:09,962
I know, I just... [sighs]
122
00:11:13,090 --> 00:11:14,841
I just need more time.
123
00:11:14,842 --> 00:11:17,719
[therapist] Okay. Time for what?
124
00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:24,017
Time to figure out how to explain...
125
00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:27,354
Explain what?
126
00:11:30,148 --> 00:11:32,067
[clicks tongue, sighs]
127
00:11:33,110 --> 00:11:34,528
[therapist] What do you mean?
128
00:11:40,075 --> 00:11:42,494
[bell tolling]
129
00:11:45,122 --> 00:11:47,541
[Eli] Mmm. Here you go.
130
00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:52,254
[sighs]
131
00:11:58,135 --> 00:11:59,719
[burps]
132
00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:01,470
[chuckles] Very good.
133
00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:05,309
Well, listen, um,
I have a game for you today.
134
00:12:06,393 --> 00:12:09,478
It's not the mad game,
so no blocks. Promise.
135
00:12:09,479 --> 00:12:13,358
Matter of fact, you don't really
have to do anything, actually.
136
00:12:14,610 --> 00:12:20,657
Just follow my finger
with your eyes back and forth.
137
00:12:24,870 --> 00:12:27,664
Don't move your head, just your eyes.
138
00:12:28,790 --> 00:12:31,168
Back, forth.
139
00:12:32,211 --> 00:12:33,503
This is easy.
140
00:12:33,504 --> 00:12:35,631
Ah, perfect. Keep going.
141
00:12:41,345 --> 00:12:46,600
Back, forth.
142
00:12:49,353 --> 00:12:52,523
Now, I want you to think back
to your earliest memory.
143
00:12:55,359 --> 00:12:59,571
One of the first things you remember.
Go way back to when you were very small...
144
00:13:02,157 --> 00:13:05,827
and try to remember a feeling,
a very strong feeling.
145
00:13:06,828 --> 00:13:10,666
Mmm. Maybe anger, maybe fear.
146
00:13:14,336 --> 00:13:15,712
Are you thinking about it?
147
00:13:16,380 --> 00:13:17,381
Good.
148
00:13:18,924 --> 00:13:19,967
Okay.
149
00:13:23,220 --> 00:13:26,181
[pen clicking]
150
00:13:28,350 --> 00:13:31,562
Now I want you to picture it carefully
in your mind.
151
00:13:32,229 --> 00:13:36,024
[clicking continues]
152
00:13:37,109 --> 00:13:38,735
And imagine yourself there.
153
00:13:42,114 --> 00:13:46,285
- [groans]
- [clicking continues]
154
00:13:48,537 --> 00:13:52,624
Think about what you see,
what you hear, what you feel.
155
00:13:53,625 --> 00:13:55,126
[ceiling cracking]
156
00:13:55,127 --> 00:13:56,336
[inhales deeply]
157
00:13:58,297 --> 00:14:00,715
- Noah?
- [creaking, breaking]
158
00:14:00,716 --> 00:14:01,800
Noah?
159
00:14:02,301 --> 00:14:06,138
[breathing shakily]
160
00:14:07,848 --> 00:14:09,974
- Draw it now, Noah.
- [breathing shakily]
161
00:14:09,975 --> 00:14:11,977
Draw what you see. Show me.
162
00:14:17,441 --> 00:14:18,733
Good, Noah.
163
00:14:18,734 --> 00:14:20,151
[breathes shakily]
164
00:14:20,152 --> 00:14:21,277
Keep drawing, Noah.
165
00:14:21,278 --> 00:14:22,738
[grunting]
166
00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:27,201
[exhales sharply]
167
00:14:39,671 --> 00:14:41,173
I hurt him.
168
00:14:42,591 --> 00:14:43,926
But he's okay.
169
00:14:44,593 --> 00:14:46,720
Do you remember why you did it?
170
00:14:48,472 --> 00:14:51,182
- Something's wrong with me.
- [Eli] What is it?
171
00:14:51,183 --> 00:14:53,769
[Noah breathing shakily]
172
00:14:54,561 --> 00:14:55,603
Noah?
173
00:14:55,604 --> 00:14:57,648
[breathes shakily, whimpers]
174
00:15:00,150 --> 00:15:01,192
Cold.
175
00:15:01,193 --> 00:15:03,736
[inhales deeply] Cold.
176
00:15:03,737 --> 00:15:05,446
Okay. It's okay.
177
00:15:05,447 --> 00:15:07,449
[shivering, whimpering]
178
00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:09,576
Okay.
179
00:15:10,077 --> 00:15:12,955
- [Noah breathing heavily]
- It's okay.
180
00:15:14,873 --> 00:15:15,874
All right.
181
00:15:16,875 --> 00:15:18,502
[inhales sharply, whimpers]
182
00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:21,004
[cries]
183
00:15:23,632 --> 00:15:25,467
[crying]
184
00:15:33,016 --> 00:15:34,017
[whimpers]
185
00:15:40,148 --> 00:15:42,024
[assistant]
Okay, so we've got transference,
186
00:15:42,025 --> 00:15:45,194
compartmentalized mimicry
and selective mutism.
187
00:15:45,195 --> 00:15:49,532
And then we've got episodes of aggression
associated with situational amnesia.
188
00:15:49,533 --> 00:15:52,702
And unexplained
second language acquisition.
189
00:15:52,703 --> 00:15:54,537
[assistant] Wow. Okay.
190
00:15:54,538 --> 00:15:59,083
Well, I checked all of your referrals
and your consults over the last six years,
191
00:15:59,084 --> 00:16:01,085
and as far as I can see,
192
00:16:01,086 --> 00:16:04,380
you have never professionally
crossed paths with this kid.
193
00:16:04,381 --> 00:16:06,007
Hmm.
194
00:16:06,008 --> 00:16:08,050
[assistant] I don't know.
Maybe you met him socially?
195
00:16:08,051 --> 00:16:11,220
Oh, sure.
At the senior citizens/preschool mixer.
196
00:16:11,221 --> 00:16:12,597
[assistant] Sounds like fun.
197
00:16:12,598 --> 00:16:13,849
Baby food for all?
198
00:16:14,683 --> 00:16:16,518
Yeah. [groaning] Ow.
199
00:16:17,895 --> 00:16:19,353
You really should get that checked.
200
00:16:19,354 --> 00:16:21,606
I'm a doctor, I checked it myself.
201
00:16:21,607 --> 00:16:23,233
[assistant] Uh-huh. I'm sure you did.
202
00:16:26,028 --> 00:16:27,487
Okay, I better get to typing.
203
00:16:32,117 --> 00:16:33,160
Hang on for a sec.
204
00:16:35,329 --> 00:16:37,163
- I want you to check this out.
- [assistant] Hmm?
205
00:16:37,164 --> 00:16:38,873
[Eli] See if you can find out where it is.
206
00:16:38,874 --> 00:16:41,502
Hmm. Yeah, I can try.
207
00:16:42,044 --> 00:16:43,420
Uh... Who's BW?
208
00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:45,755
Not sure.
209
00:16:45,756 --> 00:16:47,049
[assistant] It's for the case?
210
00:16:49,092 --> 00:16:50,510
Honestly, I don't know.
211
00:16:50,511 --> 00:16:52,803
[dishes clattering]
212
00:16:52,804 --> 00:16:53,971
Hi.
213
00:16:53,972 --> 00:16:55,556
Oh, you made it.
214
00:16:55,557 --> 00:16:59,435
Yeah. So sorry I'm late. Uh, work stuff.
215
00:16:59,436 --> 00:17:00,603
- Mm-hmm.
- [door opens]
216
00:17:00,604 --> 00:17:01,812
[footsteps approaching]
217
00:17:01,813 --> 00:17:03,981
- Oh, hi.
- Hi.
218
00:17:03,982 --> 00:17:05,651
Did you bring Grandma?
219
00:17:06,443 --> 00:17:08,403
Oh, no, sweetie.
220
00:17:09,695 --> 00:17:11,990
[smacks lips] Uh, Grandma died.
221
00:17:12,907 --> 00:17:13,992
Remember?
222
00:17:14,952 --> 00:17:17,663
So she can't come with him.
223
00:17:18,789 --> 00:17:24,376
But, uh, she's in heaven
and all around us.
224
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:26,295
Hey, Sophie. Look what I got you.
225
00:17:26,296 --> 00:17:27,380
Quarters.
226
00:17:27,381 --> 00:17:29,091
- [coins clink]
- Thanks.
227
00:17:30,259 --> 00:17:32,134
[faucet running]
228
00:17:32,135 --> 00:17:34,221
- See you in a bit.
- [door closes]
229
00:17:35,514 --> 00:17:36,514
[faucet closes]
230
00:17:36,515 --> 00:17:39,600
"Grandma is in heaven and all around us."
231
00:17:39,601 --> 00:17:42,603
Why didn't you just say that Grandma
turned into a magical unicorn?
232
00:17:42,604 --> 00:17:45,148
[scoffs] What exactly
did you want me to say, Dad?
233
00:17:45,649 --> 00:17:47,567
Do like you did when my grandma died,
234
00:17:47,568 --> 00:17:50,319
and say that death is like
having your batteries run out
235
00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:51,529
and you can't replace them?
236
00:17:51,530 --> 00:17:52,655
I never said that.
237
00:17:52,656 --> 00:17:54,866
And in my defense,
it was an educational moment.
238
00:17:54,867 --> 00:17:58,703
[scoffs] My whole childhood
was an educational moment.
239
00:17:58,704 --> 00:18:00,621
Oh, really? Are we gonna go back that far?
240
00:18:00,622 --> 00:18:02,790
'Cause I only penciled in
an hour for this dinner.
241
00:18:02,791 --> 00:18:04,501
Oh, scheduling humor.
242
00:18:05,127 --> 00:18:06,210
Hilarious.
243
00:18:06,211 --> 00:18:07,670
You're still mad at me.
244
00:18:07,671 --> 00:18:09,672
Now, why would I be mad at you?
245
00:18:09,673 --> 00:18:11,757
Look, as I told you, my cell phone died,
246
00:18:11,758 --> 00:18:14,219
- and I didn't know it and it was--
- [sighs]
247
00:18:15,846 --> 00:18:19,056
And what I'm trying to say is I'm sorry.
248
00:18:19,057 --> 00:18:21,143
There. Was that so hard?
249
00:18:21,727 --> 00:18:22,978
I accept your apology.
250
00:18:24,146 --> 00:18:26,148
- And your pie.
- It's apple.
251
00:18:26,648 --> 00:18:27,691
[Barbara] It better be.
252
00:18:30,611 --> 00:18:32,904
Sue Ann said you're ready
to sell the house.
253
00:18:32,905 --> 00:18:35,823
No, no, no. What I said to her was
she should call you.
254
00:18:35,824 --> 00:18:39,869
Great. You know, I've already looked into
some potential living situations for you.
255
00:18:39,870 --> 00:18:41,579
[Eli] Let's not
get ahead of ourselves, okay?
256
00:18:41,580 --> 00:18:46,585
Real estate is a very unpredictable market
right now, so this could take some time.
257
00:18:47,961 --> 00:18:50,796
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I gotta go see a man about a horse.
258
00:18:50,797 --> 00:18:52,090
[chuckles]
259
00:19:07,356 --> 00:19:08,607
[faucet running]
260
00:19:14,571 --> 00:19:17,324
Here I am, like a magical unicorn.
261
00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:19,451
Would you just stop?
262
00:19:22,663 --> 00:19:25,706
[breathes shakily]
263
00:19:25,707 --> 00:19:27,626
- [Barbara] Dad?
- [knocking]
264
00:19:28,669 --> 00:19:30,586
Stop what? Who are you talking to?
265
00:19:30,587 --> 00:19:31,880
[stammers]
266
00:19:36,134 --> 00:19:39,137
[pen clicking]
267
00:19:40,556 --> 00:19:43,058
[clicking continues]
268
00:19:44,726 --> 00:19:46,603
[cracking, rumbling]
269
00:19:47,980 --> 00:19:50,439
[breathes shakily]
270
00:19:50,440 --> 00:19:52,191
I was not spying on you.
271
00:19:52,192 --> 00:19:54,819
I just happened to overhear you
talking to yourself.
272
00:19:54,820 --> 00:19:57,071
I was not talking to myself.
273
00:19:57,072 --> 00:19:59,157
Well, then who were you talking to?
274
00:19:59,825 --> 00:20:01,033
[sighs]
275
00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:03,035
See? This is exactly
what I'm talking about.
276
00:20:03,036 --> 00:20:06,497
It feels like you are bottling up
all of these feelings.
277
00:20:06,498 --> 00:20:08,749
Listen, we're all dealing
with this in our own way.
278
00:20:08,750 --> 00:20:11,837
[Barbara] Are we? Because it feels
like you are not dealing with it at all.
279
00:20:12,462 --> 00:20:13,588
You know what I don't need?
280
00:20:13,589 --> 00:20:17,216
I don't need you examining
every single move I make.
281
00:20:17,217 --> 00:20:20,803
You make me feel like some senile nut job
who's gone completely off the rails.
282
00:20:20,804 --> 00:20:22,013
Well, you know what I don't need?
283
00:20:22,014 --> 00:20:24,223
I don't need you pretending
like it didn't happen.
284
00:20:24,224 --> 00:20:28,103
It happened, okay?
She's gone, and she isn't coming back.
285
00:20:29,521 --> 00:20:30,771
[Sophie] Mom.
286
00:20:30,772 --> 00:20:33,609
Oh, hey, Sophie.
287
00:20:34,234 --> 00:20:36,653
- [Eli] Hey, who's that for?
- Gran.
288
00:20:37,654 --> 00:20:40,866
Sophie asked earlier
if she could have a candle for her gran.
289
00:20:41,783 --> 00:20:43,076
Is that okay? [sighs]
290
00:20:45,370 --> 00:20:48,665
Of course it's okay.
W-Why wouldn't it be okay? [chuckles]
291
00:20:49,708 --> 00:20:50,751
Thanks, sweetie.
292
00:20:57,174 --> 00:21:00,801
[rumbling]
293
00:21:00,802 --> 00:21:02,179
[gasps]
294
00:21:04,431 --> 00:21:06,850
- [Noah breathes shakily]
- [cracking]
295
00:21:09,061 --> 00:21:11,104
[shivering]
296
00:21:14,775 --> 00:21:17,319
[cracking]
297
00:21:18,946 --> 00:21:19,947
[yelps]
298
00:21:20,614 --> 00:21:22,616
[breathing heavily]
299
00:21:24,243 --> 00:21:26,578
- [rumbling]
- [panting]
300
00:21:35,587 --> 00:21:36,713
It's okay, Dad.
301
00:21:38,173 --> 00:21:39,758
I know you blame yourself,
302
00:21:40,717 --> 00:21:42,845
but there's nothing
that you could have done.
303
00:21:44,638 --> 00:21:46,557
You just have to let yourself
off the hook.
304
00:21:47,724 --> 00:21:48,851
Please.
305
00:21:56,942 --> 00:22:00,194
- Ta-da. [chuckles] Hey.
- [chuckling] Yay.
306
00:22:00,195 --> 00:22:01,446
There you go.
307
00:22:02,489 --> 00:22:03,699
[Eli groans]
308
00:22:05,617 --> 00:22:06,492
- [papers crash]
- [gasps]
309
00:22:06,493 --> 00:22:08,537
- [Barbara] Oh.
- Ooh, ooh. That's all my work.
310
00:22:09,621 --> 00:22:10,664
[groaning] Yeah.
311
00:22:11,915 --> 00:22:13,208
It's okay. I got it.
312
00:22:15,711 --> 00:22:18,004
He's stabbing the bad thing on his neck.
313
00:22:18,005 --> 00:22:19,548
[Eli] No, he's not st...
314
00:22:23,343 --> 00:22:24,386
[Sophie] See?
315
00:22:27,639 --> 00:22:28,723
Oh, my God.
316
00:22:28,724 --> 00:22:29,933
[Barbara] Dad?
317
00:22:30,934 --> 00:22:32,518
- I have to go.
- [Barbara] What is it?
318
00:22:32,519 --> 00:22:35,189
[Eli] I have to go. [grunts] I have to go.
319
00:22:39,193 --> 00:22:41,570
[chattering]
320
00:22:42,487 --> 00:22:44,614
- [Gail] It's okay. He's okay.
- What?
321
00:22:44,615 --> 00:22:46,032
W-What happened?
322
00:22:46,033 --> 00:22:48,409
Apparently, he almost drowned.
323
00:22:48,410 --> 00:22:49,578
What? [stammers]
324
00:22:51,455 --> 00:22:53,623
- Where were you?
- It was the shift change.
325
00:22:53,624 --> 00:22:55,249
And he got near water? I mean, what water?
326
00:22:55,250 --> 00:22:56,959
[stammers] He had a cup on the nightstand.
327
00:22:56,960 --> 00:22:58,628
[chuckling] What the hell
are you talking about?
328
00:22:58,629 --> 00:23:00,338
He can't drown himself
with a cup of water.
329
00:23:00,339 --> 00:23:03,633
I don't know what to say.
His lungs were full of water.
330
00:23:03,634 --> 00:23:06,886
This is a pediatric psych ward. A child
should not almost drown in his own bed.
331
00:23:06,887 --> 00:23:08,180
Okay. Come with me.
332
00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:10,848
- You need to calm down.
- That should not have happened.
333
00:23:10,849 --> 00:23:13,226
- I know, but it did.
- [sighs deeply]
334
00:23:13,227 --> 00:23:16,062
He's getting moved. They're gonna put him
in long-term acute care.
335
00:23:16,063 --> 00:23:17,939
Oh, wait a second.
I'm still working with him.
336
00:23:17,940 --> 00:23:20,274
Eli, they are treating this
as a suicide attempt.
337
00:23:20,275 --> 00:23:21,484
You know what that means.
338
00:23:21,485 --> 00:23:23,611
He has to be moved
to a higher security unit.
339
00:23:23,612 --> 00:23:26,365
- They're moving him tomorrow.
- No. I'll take him.
340
00:23:27,741 --> 00:23:28,908
You know that's not okay.
341
00:23:28,909 --> 00:23:30,451
Gail, he's not safe here.
342
00:23:30,452 --> 00:23:32,703
I'm not gonna let something happen to him.
343
00:23:32,704 --> 00:23:34,456
I'm not gonna let him die.
344
00:23:35,082 --> 00:23:38,668
Eli, I'm sorry about your wife.
345
00:23:38,669 --> 00:23:41,128
I-I can't imagine
what that must have been like for you.
346
00:23:41,129 --> 00:23:43,506
I thought work would be
a good distraction.
347
00:23:43,507 --> 00:23:45,383
I thought you were ready, but I was wrong.
348
00:23:45,384 --> 00:23:50,138
- Gail, please le--
- No, you are not yourself right now, Eli.
349
00:23:51,598 --> 00:23:53,058
I wanna see my patient.
350
00:24:02,776 --> 00:24:04,902
[announcer on PA]
Dr. Webster to Admitting.
351
00:24:04,903 --> 00:24:06,697
Dr. Webster to Admitting.
352
00:24:15,247 --> 00:24:16,248
Noah?
353
00:24:21,962 --> 00:24:24,840
Noah, I know you didn't mean
to hurt that other boy.
354
00:24:25,966 --> 00:24:27,758
You were trying to protect him,
weren't you?
355
00:24:27,759 --> 00:24:30,262
From that thing around his neck.
356
00:24:36,852 --> 00:24:38,187
What is that thing?
357
00:24:41,148 --> 00:24:42,524
Look, I know you're scared,
358
00:24:44,151 --> 00:24:47,404
and I think that maybe
something scary happened to you.
359
00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:51,491
Did someone hurt you?
360
00:24:52,492 --> 00:24:53,869
It's okay to tell me.
361
00:24:57,414 --> 00:24:58,664
You won't be mad?
362
00:24:58,665 --> 00:25:00,542
[Eli] No, I promise.
363
00:25:03,545 --> 00:25:04,963
Who hurt you?
364
00:25:09,551 --> 00:25:10,677
[whispers] You did.
365
00:25:11,470 --> 00:25:14,515
- [faucet dripping]
- [inhales sharply]
366
00:25:28,403 --> 00:25:29,530
[dripping continues]
367
00:25:32,783 --> 00:25:34,826
[diving board creaking]
368
00:25:49,967 --> 00:25:52,678
I've been accused of not being myself.
369
00:25:54,304 --> 00:25:57,307
Do you think that's true?
That you're not yourself?
370
00:25:58,100 --> 00:25:59,517
[Eli] Maybe.
371
00:25:59,518 --> 00:26:02,855
I used to think of myself as somebody
who had the answers, you know?
372
00:26:04,481 --> 00:26:07,150
[chuckles] But now... [groans]
373
00:26:08,527 --> 00:26:10,821
Now, I don't think
I know anything anymore.
374
00:26:12,990 --> 00:26:16,368
Can you identify the moment
that that feeling changed?
375
00:26:19,329 --> 00:26:20,581
Yeah, of course.
376
00:26:23,584 --> 00:26:24,960
It was the day my wife died.
377
00:26:27,296 --> 00:26:28,379
[sighs]
378
00:26:28,380 --> 00:26:29,548
Okay.
379
00:26:30,632 --> 00:26:31,925
Let's talk about that.
380
00:26:37,681 --> 00:26:39,057
It was a normal day.
381
00:26:42,186 --> 00:26:43,687
She had been sick for a while.
382
00:26:46,607 --> 00:26:47,691
Cancer.
383
00:26:49,902 --> 00:26:51,195
But she was fighting it.
384
00:26:52,321 --> 00:26:54,489
And we'd agreed
that we would fight it together.
385
00:27:00,996 --> 00:27:02,915
She was feeling upbeat, so...
386
00:27:05,501 --> 00:27:06,793
I decided to go out.
387
00:27:10,839 --> 00:27:12,090
[Lynn] Wait.
388
00:27:13,509 --> 00:27:14,635
You're leaving?
389
00:27:15,135 --> 00:27:17,721
I'll be back soon. I'll bring you Chinese.
390
00:27:22,976 --> 00:27:24,770
Egg drop soup. [chuckles softly]
391
00:27:25,521 --> 00:27:27,314
It was the one thing
that she could always eat.
392
00:27:30,526 --> 00:27:31,944
So I went to the pool...
393
00:27:32,486 --> 00:27:34,446
[people chattering]
394
00:27:50,879 --> 00:27:52,548
[Eli] And then I went to Mr. Chang's.
395
00:28:00,681 --> 00:28:01,890
And then I came home.
396
00:28:04,226 --> 00:28:08,814
I wasn't gone long, you know.
Hour, maybe an hour and a half.
397
00:28:14,528 --> 00:28:15,571
I'm back.
398
00:28:16,572 --> 00:28:18,073
- [faucet dripping]
- Lynn?
399
00:28:20,826 --> 00:28:22,953
[Larry panting]
400
00:28:23,537 --> 00:28:25,622
[dripping continues]
401
00:28:30,210 --> 00:28:32,588
- [dripping continues]
- She didn't answer.
402
00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:37,134
[dripping continues]
403
00:28:46,268 --> 00:28:47,728
[breathing heavily]
404
00:28:49,229 --> 00:28:51,523
- [dripping continues]
- [diving board creaking]
405
00:28:55,194 --> 00:28:56,737
[exhales heavily]
406
00:28:57,321 --> 00:28:59,947
[panting]
407
00:28:59,948 --> 00:29:02,201
- [door creaking]
- [faucet dripping]
408
00:29:06,747 --> 00:29:07,789
[gasps]
409
00:29:13,253 --> 00:29:14,505
[sighs]
410
00:29:16,215 --> 00:29:17,924
At first, I thought it wasn't her,
you know?
411
00:29:17,925 --> 00:29:19,718
I mean, I knew it was her,
412
00:29:21,220 --> 00:29:23,305
but it just felt
like it was somebody else.
413
00:29:26,058 --> 00:29:28,393
[diving board creaking]
414
00:29:38,612 --> 00:29:41,114
- [siren wailing]
- [distorted radio chatter]
415
00:30:04,972 --> 00:30:06,139
And that's what happened.
416
00:30:10,102 --> 00:30:14,815
I went out, I came home, and she was gone.
417
00:30:19,486 --> 00:30:20,529
What?
418
00:30:21,864 --> 00:30:23,699
Was there something more
you wanted to tell me?
419
00:30:28,245 --> 00:30:29,246
No.
420
00:30:32,416 --> 00:30:33,500
That was it.
421
00:30:35,627 --> 00:30:37,004
[Lynn, therapist] Are you sure?
422
00:30:42,384 --> 00:30:43,551
I have to go.
423
00:30:43,552 --> 00:30:45,928
- No, Eli, wait. This is important work.
- No. I-I have to go.
424
00:30:45,929 --> 00:30:47,346
- No. Wait.
- You don't understand.
425
00:30:47,347 --> 00:30:49,224
There was nothing I could do.
She killed herself.
426
00:30:49,850 --> 00:30:51,018
[echoing] Liar.
427
00:30:55,647 --> 00:30:56,690
[door slams]
428
00:31:04,031 --> 00:31:05,282
[gasps]
429
00:31:25,928 --> 00:31:28,430
[faucet dripping]
430
00:32:16,395 --> 00:32:19,106
[dripping continues]