1
00:00:01,046 --> 00:00:03,686
(BIRDSONG)

2
00:00:07,086 --> 00:00:08,966
OK. Can you get off? Good boy.

3
00:00:08,966 --> 00:00:11,326
MAY: Oh, Helen?
We're hosting book club tonight.

4
00:00:11,326 --> 00:00:12,926
Do you want to join us?

5
00:00:12,926 --> 00:00:15,646
Same room, people. Can't hear you
unless you're in the same room.

6
00:00:15,646 --> 00:00:17,366
Can't hear ya, May!

7
00:00:17,366 --> 00:00:21,726
We are hosting book club tonight.
Would you like to join us?

8
00:00:21,726 --> 00:00:23,766
We're doing Three Women.
Uh...

9
00:00:23,766 --> 00:00:25,886
Doing three women!

10
00:00:25,886 --> 00:00:27,446
Why is that funny?

11
00:00:28,686 --> 00:00:31,046
Doing.
What?

12
00:00:31,046 --> 00:00:32,766
It's not funny,
but what he's saying is, like,

13
00:00:32,766 --> 00:00:34,526
that you're...doing three women.

14
00:00:34,526 --> 00:00:35,606
Yeah.

15
00:00:35,606 --> 00:00:37,606
Yeah, but he's saying it as, like...

16
00:00:37,606 --> 00:00:39,366
..DOING doing,

17
00:00:39,366 --> 00:00:43,286
not...not doing,
but, you know, doing.

18
00:00:43,286 --> 00:00:46,246
You know, you're...doing.

19
00:00:46,246 --> 00:00:47,366
Oh!
Doing.

20
00:00:47,366 --> 00:00:49,046
Intercourse.

21
00:00:49,046 --> 00:00:50,206
Mmm.

22
00:01:03,446 --> 00:01:06,406
Helen? This is Terry Montanello.

23
00:01:06,406 --> 00:01:08,446
Said he's here to see Roz,
but she's not in.

24
00:01:08,446 --> 00:01:10,566
That's OK. Terry. Come in.
Thanks, George.

25
00:01:10,566 --> 00:01:14,046
I'm Helen. I'm the new Roz.
Sit down. Go. Talk.

26
00:01:14,046 --> 00:01:16,406
What do you need? What can I do for
you? Somebody died? What's happened?

27
00:01:16,406 --> 00:01:18,806
Well, my great-aunt, Maria,
she passed away.

28
00:01:18,806 --> 00:01:20,806
And I was...
Yep. That's very sad.

29
00:01:20,806 --> 00:01:22,766
I'm sorry,
have you really replaced Roz?

30
00:01:22,766 --> 00:01:26,046
Yeah. I'm the new Roz.
Hello, Terry. Sorry I'm late.

31
00:01:26,046 --> 00:01:27,886
Thank you, Helen.
I'll take it from here.

32
00:01:27,886 --> 00:01:31,006
Off you pop.
Helen says she's your replacement.

33
00:01:31,006 --> 00:01:33,886
Oh, God, no. Oh, no. No, no, no, no.

34
00:01:33,886 --> 00:01:35,806
No.
Well, that's a relief.

35
00:01:35,806 --> 00:01:37,046
(ROZ LAUGHS)
Is it?

36
00:01:37,046 --> 00:01:39,606
N-no offence. Sorry.
Alright. Well, point of order, Terry.

37
00:01:39,606 --> 00:01:41,086
Just because you say "No offence,"

38
00:01:41,086 --> 00:01:43,926
it doesn't render the offensive
thing you just said not offensive.

39
00:01:43,926 --> 00:01:47,326
Helen, why don't you go and work
on bringing in some new business?

40
00:01:47,326 --> 00:01:49,566
You're not required here.
That's offensive.

41
00:01:49,566 --> 00:01:51,646
Now, let's get to know
your Aunt Maria. In the will...

42
00:01:51,646 --> 00:01:54,286
You should know, Terry, that Roz
can't work as a solicitor anymore.

43
00:01:54,286 --> 00:01:56,286
She was struck off.
Oh, I'm sorry, suspended.

44
00:01:56,286 --> 00:01:58,286
Out!
Just so you know.

45
00:01:58,286 --> 00:01:59,766
Sorry.

46
00:01:59,766 --> 00:02:02,366
(LAUGHS)
(GASPS) That's an excellent choice.

47
00:02:02,366 --> 00:02:05,486
Ray, can I ask a couple of questions
about this case you don't want to do?

48
00:02:05,486 --> 00:02:09,166
Yeah. Make it quick. I got to
get to court for the listing.

49
00:02:09,166 --> 00:02:10,726
No, it's Monday.
So?

50
00:02:10,726 --> 00:02:12,806
Well, listings are on Tuesday.
What are you, the boss of court?

51
00:02:12,806 --> 00:02:14,126
Hurry up. What do you need?
OK.

52
00:02:14,126 --> 00:02:17,046
No time for sitting, buddy.
So I read the file.

53
00:02:17,046 --> 00:02:18,526
Uh-huh.
It says the brother gets the farm.

54
00:02:18,526 --> 00:02:21,286
The sister gets the family Bible.
Seriously?

55
00:02:21,286 --> 00:02:23,526
Yeah,
but apparently very nice Bible.

56
00:02:23,526 --> 00:02:25,126
It's got Jesus and prayers in it.

57
00:02:25,126 --> 00:02:26,686
There's a burning bush

58
00:02:26,686 --> 00:02:28,726
and some begetting and begatting,
that kind of stuff.

59
00:02:28,726 --> 00:02:30,206
Wow. You're really selling it.

60
00:02:30,206 --> 00:02:32,806
But we're representing the brother,
who drives a party bus.

61
00:02:32,806 --> 00:02:34,166
Is that right?
Yeah. And?

62
00:02:34,166 --> 00:02:37,486
I don't get it. It says the sister
worked the farm her whole life.

63
00:02:37,486 --> 00:02:38,966
Why was she left out?

64
00:02:38,966 --> 00:02:41,166
Dad was old-school
and believed that...ohh...

65
00:02:41,166 --> 00:02:42,966
..property should be
handed down the male line,

66
00:02:42,966 --> 00:02:45,166
which would never stand up in court.

67
00:02:45,166 --> 00:02:48,126
I propose we get on the front foot
and suggest 50/50 split.

68
00:02:48,126 --> 00:02:50,566
OK. Well, that's easy.
Not really.

69
00:02:50,566 --> 00:02:52,686
Alice Pike
is representing the sister,

70
00:02:52,686 --> 00:02:55,086
and she'll be gunning
for a lot more than half.

71
00:02:55,086 --> 00:02:58,246
So? I'll just tell her, "The deal's
50/50. You take it or leave it."

72
00:02:58,246 --> 00:03:00,166
(LAUGHS)
I'm loving your confidence, Fisk.

73
00:03:00,166 --> 00:03:02,646
I almost wish I could stick around
and watch the car crash.

74
00:03:02,646 --> 00:03:05,606
But I can't. 'Cause I got to go.
To the imaginary listings?

75
00:03:05,606 --> 00:03:07,086
Yep. Good get from you.

76
00:03:07,086 --> 00:03:10,206
Let's see how funny you are
after half an hour with Alice Pike.

77
00:03:10,206 --> 00:03:12,006
What does that...
Ray, what does that mean?

78
00:03:12,006 --> 00:03:15,166
What do you...what...?
Good luck, Fisk!

79
00:03:15,166 --> 00:03:16,806
(DOOR OPENS)

80
00:03:20,086 --> 00:03:21,686
Raymond.
Pike.

81
00:03:21,686 --> 00:03:23,166
We're supposed to have a meeting!

82
00:03:23,166 --> 00:03:25,246
I handed that over
to my colleague, Helen Tudor.

83
00:03:25,246 --> 00:03:27,526
George, if you could help out Alice,
that'd be wonderful.

84
00:03:27,526 --> 00:03:29,566
Hello. Can I help you?
(DEVICE BUZZES)

85
00:03:29,566 --> 00:03:31,046
Hello. Alice Pike.

86
00:03:31,046 --> 00:03:32,606
Yes, four o'clock on the 15th.

87
00:03:32,606 --> 00:03:35,886
Send me an iCal invite. Let them
know I have a hard stop at 4:20.

88
00:03:35,886 --> 00:03:38,086
Alice Pike.
I was supposed to see Raymond.

89
00:03:38,086 --> 00:03:40,526
I believe it's now Helen Tudor.

90
00:03:40,526 --> 00:03:42,006
Fisk.
What?

91
00:03:42,006 --> 00:03:45,246
Uh...uh, Tudor-Fisk.
I'm sorry, do you speak English?

92
00:03:45,246 --> 00:03:47,006
(DEVICE BUZZES)
Hello. Alice Pike.

93
00:03:47,006 --> 00:03:48,686
Yes, talk to me. Quickly, please.
GEORGE: Uh...

94
00:03:48,686 --> 00:03:50,566
And the meeting
is taking place where?

95
00:03:50,566 --> 00:03:53,046
I think it's either, um,
Helen's office or the meeting room.

96
00:03:53,046 --> 00:03:54,806
I'll check.
Got it. Text me to confirm.

97
00:03:54,806 --> 00:03:56,286
Thank you.
OK, no worries.

98
00:03:56,286 --> 00:03:58,406
This way?
Yeah, just to the left.

99
00:03:58,406 --> 00:04:00,966
Did you still want me
to text you to confirm or...

100
00:04:00,966 --> 00:04:03,326
I'll send it to this number
on the card.

101
00:04:05,766 --> 00:04:07,846
Helen Tudor, Alice Pike.

102
00:04:07,846 --> 00:04:08,886
(DEVICE BUZZES)
Hello.

103
00:04:08,886 --> 00:04:10,966
Hello. Alice Pike.
Erm...

104
00:04:10,966 --> 00:04:12,766
Hello. Helen Tudor-Fisk.

105
00:04:12,766 --> 00:04:14,886
Yes. Go ahead. I'm listening.
Right.

106
00:04:14,886 --> 00:04:17,446
Well, I'm taking over
Hopkins vs Hopkins, so...

107
00:04:17,446 --> 00:04:19,726
Yes, that's right. Thank you.
..I will be...

108
00:04:19,726 --> 00:04:22,046
I'm sorry. You're on the phone.
No, I'm done. Helen, is it?

109
00:04:22,046 --> 00:04:25,046
Look, I've got a hard stop at 3:30,
so let's get this done, shall we?

110
00:04:25,046 --> 00:04:28,166
I propose a 75/25 split.
OK.

111
00:04:28,166 --> 00:04:33,126
Are we talking 75/25 or 25/75,
if you know what I mean?

112
00:04:33,126 --> 00:04:34,206
I don't.
(DEVICE BUZZES)

113
00:04:34,206 --> 00:04:36,766
Hello. Alice Pike. No, I'll be
back in the office this afternoon.

114
00:04:36,766 --> 00:04:38,886
75/25. Do we have a deal?

115
00:04:38,886 --> 00:04:40,726
If it's 75/25, yes, we do.

116
00:04:40,726 --> 00:04:42,926
You're starting
to irritate me, Helen.

117
00:04:42,926 --> 00:04:44,926
Right back at you,
"Hello. Alice Pike."

118
00:04:44,926 --> 00:04:46,406
Listen to me.

119
00:04:46,406 --> 00:04:48,246
75/25.

120
00:04:48,246 --> 00:04:50,726
No, you listen to me,
because I'm the offerer,

121
00:04:50,726 --> 00:04:53,606
so I say what the offer is, and
I've just decided, oh, guess what,

122
00:04:53,606 --> 00:04:56,126
it's 90/10, to me, to my client.

123
00:04:56,126 --> 00:04:58,606
We both know
that won't hold up in court.

124
00:04:58,606 --> 00:05:00,726
Do we know that?
Do you want to find out?

125
00:05:00,726 --> 00:05:03,526
I do not, sir. 80/20.
Try again.

126
00:05:03,526 --> 00:05:05,566
70/30.
Stop wasting my time.

127
00:05:05,566 --> 00:05:08,606
Best offer on the table right now
or I'll see you in court.

128
00:05:08,606 --> 00:05:10,126
OK.

129
00:05:10,126 --> 00:05:12,326
S...
Don't you dare say 60/40.

130
00:05:12,326 --> 00:05:14,566
I wasn't going to.
You don't know what I'm gonna say.

131
00:05:14,566 --> 00:05:19,326
It was gonna be, "So, offer, 50/50."
Thank you.

132
00:05:19,326 --> 00:05:22,926
Now we have a starting point.
I'll take that to my client.

133
00:05:22,926 --> 00:05:25,366
Well...it's not a starting point,
it's a finishing point,

134
00:05:25,366 --> 00:05:27,006
and you can take it or leave it.

135
00:05:27,006 --> 00:05:29,486
What's that, now?
Erm, on the phone, please.

136
00:05:29,486 --> 00:05:31,966
Hello. Alice... Uh, it's Helen.

137
00:05:31,966 --> 00:05:34,766
Go away. I'm busy. Hard stopping.

138
00:05:34,766 --> 00:05:36,406
Yep. OK.

139
00:05:36,406 --> 00:05:38,086
ROZ: Call them today.

140
00:05:38,086 --> 00:05:40,126
(DEVICE BUZZES)
Hello. Alice Pike.

141
00:05:40,126 --> 00:05:42,526
Just a moment.

142
00:05:42,526 --> 00:05:45,446
Well, well. Roz Gruber.

143
00:05:45,446 --> 00:05:47,166
I'll call you back.

144
00:05:47,166 --> 00:05:50,046
I'm very surprised
to see YOU working here.

145
00:05:50,046 --> 00:05:51,726
I'm the office manager,
nothing more.

146
00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:54,486
She doesn't work as a solicitor
anymore. She's been suspended.

147
00:05:54,486 --> 00:05:56,366
Oh, she knows.
Oh, I know.

148
00:05:56,366 --> 00:05:58,926
George,
this is the infamous Alice Pike.

149
00:05:58,926 --> 00:06:01,326
Alice is the one
who persuaded two of my clients

150
00:06:01,326 --> 00:06:03,046
to make the complaints
that got me suspended.

151
00:06:03,046 --> 00:06:05,166
(DEVICE BUZZES)
Hello. Alice Pike.

152
00:06:05,166 --> 00:06:07,046
Yes. This is she.

153
00:06:07,046 --> 00:06:09,406
It's fine.
I'm not with anyone important.

154
00:06:09,406 --> 00:06:11,286
Go ahead. I'm listening.

155
00:06:12,286 --> 00:06:14,206
"This is she."
I mean, who says that?

156
00:06:14,206 --> 00:06:15,686
(DOOR CLOSES)
She's full of it.

157
00:06:15,686 --> 00:06:17,486
Like, I don't think
there's even anyone calling her.

158
00:06:17,486 --> 00:06:21,166
You have got to be kidding me.
No, I'm serious. She's faking it.

159
00:06:21,166 --> 00:06:22,966
Ray?

160
00:06:22,966 --> 00:06:24,606
Did you know Pike was here?

161
00:06:24,606 --> 00:06:26,526
Why do you think I went
and sat in the car for an hour?

162
00:06:26,526 --> 00:06:29,886
Apparently she wants to specialise
in wills and probate!

163
00:06:29,886 --> 00:06:31,766
Come on! That's my thing!
I'm sorry?

164
00:06:31,766 --> 00:06:34,046
That's your thing. You saw
the gap in the market years ago.

165
00:06:34,046 --> 00:06:35,526
Well done, Roz.

166
00:06:35,526 --> 00:06:37,446
We need to get more aggressive
about new business,

167
00:06:37,446 --> 00:06:38,926
keep her out of the market.

168
00:06:38,926 --> 00:06:41,526
Wow. You were right about Alice Pike.

169
00:06:41,526 --> 00:06:43,566
Hello, Roz.
ROZ: Helen!

170
00:06:43,566 --> 00:06:45,046
How's your client list going?

171
00:06:45,046 --> 00:06:47,006
We need some more business
and lots of it.

172
00:06:47,006 --> 00:06:48,886
Uh, I took a walk-in yesterday.

173
00:06:48,886 --> 00:06:50,926
Well done, Helen.
Thank you.

174
00:06:50,926 --> 00:06:54,806
Someone wandered in.
I might go sit in the car again.

175
00:06:54,806 --> 00:06:58,646
That is called passive recruitment.
I think that might be my forte.

176
00:06:58,646 --> 00:07:01,086
You need to be more proactive,
Helen. Tout for business.

177
00:07:01,086 --> 00:07:03,966
So, like, lurk at funeral homes
and hand out business cards?

178
00:07:03,966 --> 00:07:06,366
Excellent idea.
Wasn't serious.

179
00:07:06,366 --> 00:07:09,566
Then get serious!
Where's our client base?

180
00:07:09,566 --> 00:07:12,446
(SIGHS) Post office?
Old people love the post office.

181
00:07:12,446 --> 00:07:14,286
And Michel's Patisserie.

182
00:07:14,286 --> 00:07:16,806
The movies, specifically
talking through the movies.

183
00:07:16,806 --> 00:07:18,686
Church.
You can always find them at church.

184
00:07:18,686 --> 00:07:20,166
We don't want old people.

185
00:07:20,166 --> 00:07:22,766
We want middle-aged people
squabbling over an inheritance.

186
00:07:22,766 --> 00:07:25,046
Got it. Squabblers.

187
00:07:25,046 --> 00:07:29,206
Tout for squabblers.
Be a squabbler touter.

188
00:07:31,166 --> 00:07:33,206
I actually came to see Ray.

189
00:07:33,206 --> 00:07:35,246
W-where's Ray gone?

190
00:07:46,886 --> 00:07:48,566
(GASPS)

191
00:08:02,086 --> 00:08:03,846
Careful, careful, careful -
now, can you put Leslie

192
00:08:03,846 --> 00:08:05,726
in the chair
where she likes it, please?

193
00:08:12,366 --> 00:08:14,086
This way.

194
00:08:18,166 --> 00:08:22,126
My mother, you know, well, she grew
up, obviously, Second World War.

195
00:08:22,126 --> 00:08:24,126
So, I mean...
Helen!

196
00:08:24,126 --> 00:08:27,286
Um, everyone, this is Helen.
Come in. Come and join us.

197
00:08:27,286 --> 00:08:29,406
No, I'm good, May.
I haven't read the book, so...

198
00:08:29,406 --> 00:08:31,326
Oh, hang on. Snacks. I'm in. OK.

199
00:08:31,326 --> 00:08:32,926
WOMAN: Hi, Helen.
Hello.

200
00:08:32,926 --> 00:08:36,006
As I was saying, this first chapter
really reminded me

201
00:08:36,006 --> 00:08:38,006
of my own mother's story.

202
00:08:38,006 --> 00:08:40,606
Leslie's mum passed away recently.
Oh, I see.

203
00:08:40,606 --> 00:08:45,526
Mum had an inner strength.
Oh, she was a mother and a worker.

204
00:08:45,526 --> 00:08:47,766
She had a part-time job
in a cake shop.

205
00:08:47,766 --> 00:08:51,366
Ooh. How delicious.
She was a wife and a friend.

206
00:08:51,366 --> 00:08:54,926
She played canasta and tenpin bowls.

207
00:08:54,926 --> 00:08:57,566
She lived a very full life.

208
00:08:57,566 --> 00:09:00,206
I'd really love to tell HER story.

209
00:09:00,206 --> 00:09:01,726
Feel like you ARE. (LAUGHS)

210
00:09:01,726 --> 00:09:04,726
The good thing is, I'm
taking a creative writing course.

211
00:09:04,726 --> 00:09:06,446
So...

212
00:09:06,446 --> 00:09:07,726
Oh, good.

213
00:09:10,206 --> 00:09:13,246
LESLIE:
Uh, anyway, as I was saying...

214
00:09:13,246 --> 00:09:14,806
Is there any more wine?
..when a parent dies...

215
00:09:14,806 --> 00:09:16,486
Oh, God. I'm sorry, Leslie.
You're still talking.

216
00:09:16,486 --> 00:09:18,686
..it puts things in perspective.

217
00:09:18,686 --> 00:09:21,126
So what if you didn't get
the best park at the supermarket?

218
00:09:21,126 --> 00:09:23,606
You know? So bloody what?

219
00:09:23,606 --> 00:09:25,726
Speaking of car parks,
what about the chapter

220
00:09:25,726 --> 00:09:28,126
where they had sex in the car?

221
00:09:28,126 --> 00:09:29,606
Not now, Graham.

222
00:09:29,606 --> 00:09:32,366
LESLIE:
What's really hard at the moment

223
00:09:32,366 --> 00:09:34,806
is everyone
squabbling over Mum's stuff.

224
00:09:34,806 --> 00:09:37,206
Ooh! Squabbling? How are they
squabbling there, Leslie?

225
00:09:37,206 --> 00:09:38,926
I don't want to sell her house.
Mm-hm.

226
00:09:38,926 --> 00:09:41,126
I mean, it's full of memories.
Yep. What does the will say?

227
00:09:41,126 --> 00:09:42,886
Are you the executor?
Pardon?

228
00:09:42,886 --> 00:09:44,366
Well, you might not
have to sell the house.

229
00:09:44,366 --> 00:09:45,806
Oh, Helen's a lawyer.
Yeah.

230
00:09:45,806 --> 00:09:47,366
I'm a wills and probate specialist,
actually.

231
00:09:47,366 --> 00:09:48,926
WOMAN: Oh, can I have
one of those, Helen?

232
00:09:48,926 --> 00:09:51,086
Oh, you bet. There you go.
One for you.

233
00:09:51,086 --> 00:09:53,046
Oh, hello. Yep.
Bringing in some new business.

234
00:09:53,046 --> 00:09:55,566
There we go. Good stuff, all of you.
Give me a call.

235
00:09:55,566 --> 00:10:00,086
Alright. If we can just circle back
to the sex-in-the-car scenes.

236
00:10:00,086 --> 00:10:02,206
Weren't they titillating?

237
00:10:03,886 --> 00:10:06,526
But also relevant.

238
00:10:15,166 --> 00:10:17,606
ROZ: I think we should
shampoo the carpet. A dry shampoo.

239
00:10:17,606 --> 00:10:20,126
Yeah. 'Cause you can walk on that
reasonably quick.

240
00:10:20,126 --> 00:10:22,206
Mmm.
Good morning, Roz.

241
00:10:22,206 --> 00:10:24,326
What's that?
"Did you bring in any new business?"

242
00:10:24,326 --> 00:10:26,326
Ooh, I'm glad you asked.

243
00:10:26,326 --> 00:10:30,046
Two new clients, and I know
where to find a whole lot more.

244
00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:32,766
Do not say Michel's Patisserie,
because they banned me

245
00:10:32,766 --> 00:10:35,326
the last time I was there
handing out business cards.

246
00:10:35,326 --> 00:10:37,446
It's a shame.
They do such excellent coffee.

247
00:10:37,446 --> 00:10:39,606
Well, let's hear your idea, Helen.
Two words.

248
00:10:39,606 --> 00:10:42,126
Book club.

249
00:10:42,126 --> 00:10:43,686
What's the second word?

250
00:10:45,006 --> 00:10:48,046
Book clubs are full of
middle-aged people, mostly women,

251
00:10:48,046 --> 00:10:49,526
dead or dying parents,

252
00:10:49,526 --> 00:10:53,286
and they're all SQUABBLING
over their inheritance.

253
00:10:53,286 --> 00:10:56,006
That's your business strategy,
is it?

254
00:10:56,006 --> 00:10:58,006
Walk up to complete strangers
and ask,

255
00:10:58,006 --> 00:11:00,646
"Can I please come
to your book club?"

256
00:11:00,646 --> 00:11:04,846
Well, it sounded less stupid
when I said it, but, essentially...

257
00:11:04,846 --> 00:11:07,166
..yes.

258
00:11:08,446 --> 00:11:12,366
What about the vertical blinds?
Hmm. There's no doubt they're tired.

259
00:11:21,406 --> 00:11:22,966
(TYPES)

260
00:11:30,966 --> 00:11:33,846
(WHISPERS)
Oh! Fisk! Pike's in reception.

261
00:11:33,846 --> 00:11:35,606
You haven't seen me.
What? Who's in reception?

262
00:11:35,606 --> 00:11:37,766
Oh! Hello, Alice Pike.
Hello. Alice Pike.

263
00:11:37,766 --> 00:11:39,206
I just said that!

264
00:11:39,206 --> 00:11:42,486
Yes, that's all doable, but,
obviously, with a hard stop at 3:30.

265
00:11:42,486 --> 00:11:45,206
OK? Alright, circling back
to where we left off.

266
00:11:45,206 --> 00:11:47,446
The offer was deemed untenable.

267
00:11:49,726 --> 00:11:52,166
Is this
your new hardball act, Helen?

268
00:11:52,166 --> 00:11:53,646
Oh, how tedious.

269
00:11:53,646 --> 00:11:55,486
Oh, God, sorry. I thought
you were still on the phone.

270
00:11:55,486 --> 00:11:58,486
It's very hard to know with you.
My client will accept 60/40.

271
00:11:58,486 --> 00:12:00,886
And 60 goes to...?
To my client.

272
00:12:00,886 --> 00:12:03,086
Well, then, I'm sorry, no deal.

273
00:12:03,086 --> 00:12:06,126
The offer was 50/50
or I see you in court.

274
00:12:06,126 --> 00:12:07,246
Done.
Thank you.

275
00:12:07,246 --> 00:12:09,486
50/50?
No. I'll see you in court.

276
00:12:09,486 --> 00:12:11,646
RAY: We're not going to court, Fisk.

277
00:12:11,646 --> 00:12:14,966
Where...are you in the cupboard?

278
00:12:14,966 --> 00:12:17,486
It's more of a storeroom
than a cupboard.

279
00:12:17,486 --> 00:12:20,046
ROZ: So there's a few ways
we can go with this.

280
00:12:20,046 --> 00:12:23,806
And, obviously, it's your choice,
Terry, but I will say...

281
00:12:23,806 --> 00:12:25,846
(CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY)
(CAMERA CLICKS)

282
00:12:25,846 --> 00:12:28,566
(CAMERA CONTINUES CLICKING)

283
00:12:29,566 --> 00:12:31,166
(DOOR OPENS)

284
00:12:31,166 --> 00:12:33,446
(CAMERA CLICKS)

285
00:12:33,446 --> 00:12:37,726
You want me to accept 60/40,
60 to them, 40 to us. (SIGHS) Why?

286
00:12:37,726 --> 00:12:40,086
Because if we go to court,
we might end up with nothing.

287
00:12:40,086 --> 00:12:42,486
Oh, come on!
Is Alice Pike really that good?

288
00:12:42,486 --> 00:12:44,446
It's not about Pike.
It's about OUR client.

289
00:12:44,446 --> 00:12:47,246
Have a look at this bloke.
Have a look.

290
00:12:47,246 --> 00:12:49,366
This one?
Mmm.

291
00:12:49,366 --> 00:12:52,046
Alright, Brandon, uh,
we're going to film today's session

292
00:12:52,046 --> 00:12:54,766
so that we can help you
work on your presentation, so...

293
00:12:54,766 --> 00:12:57,566
You don't...George, you
don't need me in this, just Brandon.

294
00:12:57,566 --> 00:12:59,086
That's Brandon.
RAY: (VIDEO) OK.

295
00:12:59,086 --> 00:13:01,566
So, the first thing
the judge might ask is,

296
00:13:01,566 --> 00:13:03,926
"Mr Hopkins,
what do you do for a living?"

297
00:13:03,926 --> 00:13:06,206
Uh-huh.
And you would say?

298
00:13:06,206 --> 00:13:08,326
Hi, Judge. Uh, yep. OK.

299
00:13:08,326 --> 00:13:11,886
So, uh...I run me own business,
which is a party bus,

300
00:13:11,886 --> 00:13:15,246
do a lot of hens' nights,
a lot of bucks' nights, but...

301
00:13:15,246 --> 00:13:16,726
..anyone can book it.

302
00:13:16,726 --> 00:13:18,326
Like, say, you and...
you and your judge mates,

303
00:13:18,326 --> 00:13:20,606
you want to go to the pub,
I can come and pick youse all up,

304
00:13:20,606 --> 00:13:25,686
and the beauty is, you can drink
on the way to drinking at the pub.

305
00:13:25,686 --> 00:13:27,606
How good is that?
It gets better.

306
00:13:27,606 --> 00:13:29,086
The sound system is next-level.

307
00:13:29,086 --> 00:13:31,686
It's so good, a lot of people
don't want to get off.

308
00:13:31,686 --> 00:13:35,926
So we just drive around and
everyone gets munted, on the bus!

309
00:13:35,926 --> 00:13:39,646
Not me, obviously.
I don't drink and drive, anymore.

310
00:13:39,646 --> 00:13:42,046
Stop. Let's try again.
RAY: (OFFICE) Mm-hm.

311
00:13:42,046 --> 00:13:44,846
This time, when I ask you
what you do for a living,

312
00:13:44,846 --> 00:13:47,046
stop talking after
"I run me own business."

313
00:13:47,046 --> 00:13:49,926
Yeah, but some people might not know
what a party bus is.

314
00:13:49,926 --> 00:13:52,966
Which I think's for the best.
(LAUGHS)

315
00:13:52,966 --> 00:13:54,686
George? Hang on.

316
00:13:54,686 --> 00:13:57,806
Mate, put the camera back.
We're gonna be here for a while.

317
00:13:57,806 --> 00:14:00,686
Are we? 'Ray'?

318
00:14:00,686 --> 00:14:02,406
Yeah, OK. Point made.

319
00:14:02,406 --> 00:14:03,886
I...I can show you more
if you want to see...

320
00:14:03,886 --> 00:14:06,166
Uh, no need. No need.
You had me at 'munted'.

321
00:14:06,166 --> 00:14:08,246
'Ray'.

322
00:14:10,686 --> 00:14:13,006
ROZ: Here we go.

323
00:14:13,006 --> 00:14:14,486
One, two, three, four.

324
00:14:14,486 --> 00:14:18,206
(WOMEN HARMONISE)

325
00:14:18,206 --> 00:14:22,886
# Ooh, I want to find a better place
# Oh

326
00:14:22,886 --> 00:14:26,366
# Ooh, ooh

327
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:30,166
# I'm searching for a better place

328
00:14:30,166 --> 00:14:31,806
# Heaven
# Heaven

329
00:14:31,806 --> 00:14:34,366
# Must be there

330
00:14:34,366 --> 00:14:36,686
# Well, it's there
# Well, it's just got to be there

331
00:14:36,686 --> 00:14:38,926
# I've never
# Never, ever

332
00:14:38,926 --> 00:14:41,326
# Ever seen Eden

333
00:14:41,326 --> 00:14:43,726
# But ah, ah, ah

334
00:14:43,726 --> 00:14:48,966
# I don't want to live
in this place. #

335
00:14:48,966 --> 00:14:51,446
Excellent. Where's your note?
Here it is. (BLOWS PITCHPIPE)

336
00:14:51,446 --> 00:14:53,966
WOMAN: # Mmm, ah

337
00:14:53,966 --> 00:14:55,406
# There it is, Bobbie, good
# Thank you, Roz

338
00:14:55,406 --> 00:14:56,886
# Lovely, lovely from you

339
00:14:56,886 --> 00:14:59,326
# Rozalind, I think
the cleaner wants to see you. #

340
00:14:59,326 --> 00:15:02,406
The cleaner? What are you talking
about? Oh, Helen. Hello! Come on in!

341
00:15:02,406 --> 00:15:03,926
Wow. You're in a good mood.

342
00:15:03,926 --> 00:15:06,526
That is because we're singing.
It's the endorphins.

343
00:15:06,526 --> 00:15:08,006
Oh, is that what it is?

344
00:15:08,006 --> 00:15:10,766
Everybody, this is
our new associate, Helen Tudor-Fisk.

345
00:15:10,766 --> 00:15:12,486
Hello.
# Hello

346
00:15:12,486 --> 00:15:14,166
# Hello
# Hello!

347
00:15:14,166 --> 00:15:17,726
(DEEPLY) # Hello! #

348
00:15:17,726 --> 00:15:19,206
(HARMONISING STOPS)
(WOMAN HOLDS NOTE)

349
00:15:19,206 --> 00:15:22,686
(GASPS) That's Maggie.
She's our drone. Don't you love it?

350
00:15:22,686 --> 00:15:28,726
(HOLDS NOTE)

351
00:15:28,726 --> 00:15:30,166
Very Gregorian.
MAGGIE: Thank you.

352
00:15:30,166 --> 00:15:31,926
HELEN: Extraordinary.
Have a drink!

353
00:15:31,926 --> 00:15:34,446
Yeah, sure. What are we celebrating?
We're rehearsing for a funeral.

354
00:15:34,446 --> 00:15:37,406
Oh, fun.
We also do weddings. Grab a flyer.

355
00:15:37,406 --> 00:15:42,126
MAGGIE: Roz, don't forget. I'm
gonna need a new top for Saturday.

356
00:15:42,126 --> 00:15:45,166
That is noted.
I'll get you a maternity skivvy.

357
00:15:45,166 --> 00:15:47,966
Alright, ladies. Let's keep going.

358
00:15:47,966 --> 00:15:50,286
Feel free to join us
and watch the show, Helen.

359
00:15:50,286 --> 00:15:51,886
Yeah. Alright.

360
00:15:51,886 --> 00:15:55,366
I'll be, um,
in charge of endorphins, shall I?

361
00:15:55,366 --> 00:15:58,286
ROZ: One, two, three, four.

362
00:15:58,286 --> 00:16:01,966
(WOMEN HARMONISE)

363
00:16:04,006 --> 00:16:13,286
(TO TUNE OF AVE MARIA) # Aunty Maria

364
00:16:13,286 --> 00:16:15,006
# Ah

365
00:16:15,006 --> 00:16:17,366
# Aunty

366
00:16:17,366 --> 00:16:19,006
# Maria
# Ah

367
00:16:19,006 --> 00:16:23,966
# Rest in peace
# Ah...ah. #

368
00:16:23,966 --> 00:16:26,006
We'll miss you. God bless.

369
00:16:26,006 --> 00:16:28,886
Oh! Nice!

370
00:16:28,886 --> 00:16:32,326
Do more church ones. Do more
church ones. What's the other one?

371
00:16:32,326 --> 00:16:34,806
The...who knows the Our Father?
Come on. Everyone knows that one.

372
00:16:34,806 --> 00:16:36,646
I know...I know it.
Go, go, go.

373
00:16:36,646 --> 00:16:40,686
# Our Father, who art... #

374
00:16:40,686 --> 00:16:42,886
Nah. Bit slow. Bit boring.

375
00:16:42,886 --> 00:16:45,486
Do the nun one where she rocks it
with a guitar - you know, the...

376
00:16:45,486 --> 00:16:48,526
# Our Father, who art in heaven... #
Alright. OK, stop.

377
00:16:48,526 --> 00:16:50,686
Stop. I think...
now you're making fun.

378
00:16:50,686 --> 00:16:52,406
Having fun.
Sorry, Maggie, what was that?

379
00:16:52,406 --> 00:16:53,886
Ladies,
I hate to break up rehearsal,

380
00:16:53,886 --> 00:16:55,446
but I've got a birthing class
to go to.

381
00:16:55,446 --> 00:16:57,646
Oh, great!
Yes, and I've got book club.

382
00:16:57,646 --> 00:16:59,406
Ooh! Book club!
Can I tag along, Tina?

383
00:16:59,406 --> 00:17:01,606
I'm Bobbie.
Can I tag along, Bobbie?

384
00:17:01,606 --> 00:17:03,646
Sure. Have you read Three Women?

385
00:17:03,646 --> 00:17:05,126
Yes.

386
00:17:05,126 --> 00:17:07,446
What about
when they have sex in the car?

387
00:17:07,446 --> 00:17:09,366
I know! Visceral!

388
00:17:09,366 --> 00:17:10,966
Going to book club, Roz.

389
00:17:15,126 --> 00:17:17,046
HELEN: Hey, I won't be home
for dinner tonight,

390
00:17:17,046 --> 00:17:19,046
because I am off to Kay's book club.

391
00:17:19,046 --> 00:17:20,526
MAY: Who's Kay?

392
00:17:20,526 --> 00:17:22,366
I met her last night
at Bobbie's book club.

393
00:17:22,366 --> 00:17:23,886
And then she invited me
to HER book club.

394
00:17:23,886 --> 00:17:25,886
I've got a few invitations, actually.
I've got Anna.

395
00:17:25,886 --> 00:17:29,566
She's another friend of Bobbie's.
And then I've got Beverley someone.

396
00:17:29,566 --> 00:17:31,846
Hers is the third Thursday of every
month. I'll never remember that.

397
00:17:31,846 --> 00:17:34,646
But the thing is, I've told everyone
I'm lonely and I've got no friends.

398
00:17:34,646 --> 00:17:36,446
Good on you for admitting it.

399
00:17:36,446 --> 00:17:39,206
That's a good first step.
Sorry, what am I admitting?

400
00:17:39,206 --> 00:17:41,606
That you're lonely.
I'm not lonely, guys.

401
00:17:41,606 --> 00:17:44,566
I'm touting for business.
I'm squabbler-touting.

402
00:17:44,566 --> 00:17:47,526
OK.
I'm not lonely, guys.

403
00:17:47,526 --> 00:17:49,606
Got heaps of...I've got friends.

404
00:17:49,606 --> 00:17:53,246
Got a friend. Shut up. I do.

405
00:17:55,926 --> 00:17:58,166
ROZ: (KNOCKS ON DOOR) Raymond.

406
00:17:58,166 --> 00:18:00,646
Show me. Show me these photos.

407
00:18:01,846 --> 00:18:03,966
Oh, well, that's rubbish!

408
00:18:03,966 --> 00:18:05,806
Terry's not a Gruber client.

409
00:18:05,806 --> 00:18:08,046
I know that, Roz,
but Pike's claiming otherwise,

410
00:18:08,046 --> 00:18:10,206
and the board have asked us
for a meeting.

411
00:18:10,206 --> 00:18:12,406
Oh, they can have a meeting.
Get them in here.

412
00:18:12,406 --> 00:18:14,246
I've got nothing to hide.
Calm down.

413
00:18:14,246 --> 00:18:16,766
I'll give Alex Walker a call.
He knows us. He's on the board.

414
00:18:16,766 --> 00:18:18,926
And I'll just...
Yeah. I would like a meeting.

415
00:18:18,926 --> 00:18:23,006
I welcome the opportunity to
speak for myself and clear my name.

416
00:18:23,006 --> 00:18:25,326
I really think it would be easier
to just sort of...

417
00:18:25,326 --> 00:18:26,806
..do what you said.

418
00:18:26,806 --> 00:18:28,766
Mmm.
I'll organise a meeting.

419
00:18:28,766 --> 00:18:30,846
(PHONE CLATTERS)
That screen needs a wipe.

420
00:18:31,926 --> 00:18:34,366
ROZ: Just keep it short and sharp
and efficient.

421
00:18:34,366 --> 00:18:36,246
Yep. Oh, thank you, George.

422
00:18:36,246 --> 00:18:38,366
Did you want me?
Yeah, please.

423
00:18:38,366 --> 00:18:39,806
Can you guys sit down for a sec?

424
00:18:39,806 --> 00:18:44,726
So, Alice Pike has made a complaint
to the Legal Services Board.

425
00:18:44,726 --> 00:18:46,966
Oh, not about me?
No, Helen, about me.

426
00:18:46,966 --> 00:18:48,766
HELEN: Oh, good. For me.

427
00:18:48,766 --> 00:18:50,726
Not good for you, obviously.
That's bad.

428
00:18:50,726 --> 00:18:52,766
She claims
I'm in breach of my suspension

429
00:18:52,766 --> 00:18:54,326
and working as a solicitor.

430
00:18:54,326 --> 00:18:57,486
Oh, hardly! You don't do any work.
I mean, George and I do it.

431
00:18:57,486 --> 00:18:58,966
What is Alice Pike's problem?

432
00:18:58,966 --> 00:19:01,766
Oh, this goes way back
to when Roz and...

433
00:19:01,766 --> 00:19:03,766
The problem is...

434
00:19:03,766 --> 00:19:05,846
..I've always been
a better lawyer than Alice Pike.

435
00:19:05,846 --> 00:19:07,966
Back in the day, I gave her
what for in that courtroom

436
00:19:07,966 --> 00:19:09,446
on more than one occasion.

437
00:19:09,446 --> 00:19:12,646
Roz also gave Pike's boyfriend
what for at a party once.

438
00:19:12,646 --> 00:19:14,326
That's the real reason.
(GASPS)

439
00:19:14,326 --> 00:19:16,326
Did you cuckold Alice Pike?

440
00:19:16,326 --> 00:19:18,086
It was over 30 years ago.

441
00:19:18,086 --> 00:19:20,526
He said they'd broken up.
Did you just say 'cuckold'?

442
00:19:20,526 --> 00:19:23,166
Yeah, we're doing The Miller's Tale
at one of my book clubs.

443
00:19:23,166 --> 00:19:24,806
It's about cuckolding, apparently.

444
00:19:24,806 --> 00:19:26,726
I've not read it.
What's cuckolding?

445
00:19:26,726 --> 00:19:28,606
Is that the thing where
you put the belt around your neck?

446
00:19:28,606 --> 00:19:31,126
'Cause that's really dangerous, Roz.

447
00:19:31,126 --> 00:19:32,966
No, it is not that.

448
00:19:34,366 --> 00:19:36,566
Item two.

449
00:19:41,726 --> 00:19:43,406
Thank you.

450
00:19:53,886 --> 00:19:56,166
Got a bit of reading there, Helen?
What?

451
00:19:56,166 --> 00:19:58,806
Oh, no, these are for my book clubs.
I don't actually read them.

452
00:19:58,806 --> 00:20:01,446
I just wave it around,
yeah, nod a bit,

453
00:20:01,446 --> 00:20:03,406
then, yeah,
eat the snacks, drink the wine

454
00:20:03,406 --> 00:20:05,406
and tout for squabblers.

455
00:20:05,406 --> 00:20:07,846
I could do that.
Any word from the board, Raymond?

456
00:20:07,846 --> 00:20:10,286
You got your wish, Roz. Alex
Walker's coming in this afternoon.

457
00:20:10,286 --> 00:20:13,406
Great! I shall prepare my defence.

458
00:20:14,766 --> 00:20:16,286
Yeah.

459
00:20:16,286 --> 00:20:19,406
The simple answer is no,
you cannot freeze a potato.

460
00:20:21,566 --> 00:20:24,046
Maggie. Maggie, I'm telling you,
you're not in labour.

461
00:20:24,046 --> 00:20:26,446
It's just Braxton Hicks.

462
00:20:26,446 --> 00:20:28,886
No. That is definitely false labour.

463
00:20:28,886 --> 00:20:32,766
I can hear it. I can hear it.
That baby is not coming out today.

464
00:20:32,766 --> 00:20:36,246
Oh, come on, Maggie.
This is so important to me.

465
00:20:36,246 --> 00:20:38,086
This is my chance...

466
00:20:38,086 --> 00:20:39,846
Maggie?

467
00:20:39,846 --> 00:20:42,566
Maggie? Hello?

468
00:20:42,566 --> 00:20:45,526
Oh! Shit! Shit, shit!

469
00:20:45,526 --> 00:20:47,766
Shit. Shit!

470
00:20:47,766 --> 00:20:50,646
Helen!
Yep.

471
00:20:50,646 --> 00:20:52,446
What are you doing?
Nothing. I wasn't.

472
00:20:52,446 --> 00:20:53,926
Right.

473
00:20:53,926 --> 00:20:57,206
You are my new drone.
Don't know what that means.

474
00:20:57,206 --> 00:20:58,726
Listen.

475
00:20:58,726 --> 00:21:00,686
(BLOWS PITCHPIPE)

476
00:21:00,686 --> 00:21:02,166
# Maa... #

477
00:21:02,166 --> 00:21:04,046
# Ma-maa? #
(BLOWS PITCHPIPE)

478
00:21:04,046 --> 00:21:06,046
# Maa
# Maa

479
00:21:06,046 --> 00:21:07,566
# Maa...
# Ah... #

480
00:21:07,566 --> 00:21:09,926
Lower. You're the drone. Lower.

481
00:21:09,926 --> 00:21:12,046
(LOW) # Ohh... #
Use your diaphragm.

482
00:21:12,046 --> 00:21:14,646
(LOWER) # Ohh... #
That's your pelvis.

483
00:21:14,646 --> 00:21:17,206
# Ah...ah...ah... #
(BLOWS PITCHPIPE)

484
00:21:17,206 --> 00:21:19,406
Just...it's the one note.
Just hold the one note, Helen.

485
00:21:19,406 --> 00:21:22,166
I'm not a singer, Roz.
I'm not asking you to sing.

486
00:21:22,166 --> 00:21:25,566
I'm asking you to drone. Come on.
(BLOWS PITCHPIPE)

487
00:21:25,566 --> 00:21:27,366
(BOTH DRONE)

488
00:21:27,366 --> 00:21:29,246
That's it. That's it.
You've got it. You've got it.

489
00:21:29,246 --> 00:21:32,246
Fisk, what are you doing?
# I'm the drone... #

490
00:21:32,246 --> 00:21:34,606
Maggie's gone into labour,
or so she says.

491
00:21:34,606 --> 00:21:37,126
Alex is gonna be here in
half an hour, but it's not too late.

492
00:21:37,126 --> 00:21:39,366
I could still give him a call
and explain everything.

493
00:21:39,366 --> 00:21:41,126
Yeah, I reckon
let's just do what Ray said.

494
00:21:41,126 --> 00:21:45,526
Ray, this is about me going
on the record and clearing my name.

495
00:21:45,526 --> 00:21:48,806
Feels more about you showing off and
doing one of your little concerts.

496
00:21:48,806 --> 00:21:51,806
Uh, Roz, two of your
black lady Wiggles are in reception.

497
00:21:51,806 --> 00:21:54,286
(BLOWS PITCHPIPE)
And put this on.

498
00:21:55,486 --> 00:21:58,046
(DRONES)
Think you're a bit flat, Helen.

499
00:21:58,046 --> 00:22:01,006
You think? (DRONES HIGHER)
RAY: Oh, for God's sake, Fisk!

500
00:22:01,006 --> 00:22:04,406
Enough. You sound like a cow
with a vuvuzela stuck up its arse.

501
00:22:04,406 --> 00:22:06,846
What time's Pike coming in
to sign off on the 60/40 deal?

502
00:22:06,846 --> 00:22:08,366
About five. (BLOWS PITCHPIPE)
Alright.

503
00:22:08,366 --> 00:22:11,766
(DRONES)

504
00:22:11,766 --> 00:22:13,846
That's nice. (DRONES)

505
00:22:17,566 --> 00:22:19,766
MAN: That's a true story.
I'm not making that up.

506
00:22:19,766 --> 00:22:22,686
MAN 2: Mate, true or made-up,
it's still not interesting.

507
00:22:24,206 --> 00:22:26,966
And I requested a quiet ride.

508
00:22:26,966 --> 00:22:28,446
One star.

509
00:22:28,446 --> 00:22:30,366
(SIGHS)

510
00:22:35,686 --> 00:22:37,446
Ladies and gentlemen,

511
00:22:37,446 --> 00:22:39,126
distinguished guest,

512
00:22:39,126 --> 00:22:43,846
friends beyond the binary
and member of the board.

513
00:22:43,846 --> 00:22:45,526
It's a pleas...
Hurry it up, mate.

514
00:22:45,526 --> 00:22:48,206
Thank you. Thank you, George.
I'll take it from here.

515
00:22:50,206 --> 00:22:52,246
Good afternoon.

516
00:22:52,246 --> 00:22:56,286
May I present to you the Sadrigals,
an all-woman madrigal group

517
00:22:56,286 --> 00:22:59,286
available for funerals
and memorial services.

518
00:22:59,286 --> 00:23:01,566
And this...this is Terry.

519
00:23:01,566 --> 00:23:03,926
Would you please state who you are
for the record?

520
00:23:03,926 --> 00:23:05,686
My name is Terry Montanello.

521
00:23:05,686 --> 00:23:07,286
The Sadrigals will be performing

522
00:23:07,286 --> 00:23:11,486
at the funeral of my Great-Aunt
Maria this Saturday. (LAUGHS)

523
00:23:11,486 --> 00:23:13,726
And for the record...
ALEX: There's no record.

524
00:23:13,726 --> 00:23:16,486
This is an informal...

525
00:23:16,486 --> 00:23:17,966
..whatever this is.

526
00:23:17,966 --> 00:23:20,126
My apologies. I'll rephrase.

527
00:23:20,126 --> 00:23:22,606
And for those present,
would you please state

528
00:23:22,606 --> 00:23:24,926
what you are not, Terry?

529
00:23:24,926 --> 00:23:28,286
I am not a client
of Gruber & Associates.

530
00:23:28,286 --> 00:23:29,966
ROZ: Thank you. Helen?

531
00:23:29,966 --> 00:23:33,646
I also am not a client of Gruber...

532
00:23:33,646 --> 00:23:35,286
ROZ: Pitchpipe, pitchpipe.
..& As...

533
00:23:35,286 --> 00:23:37,246
Yep. Sorry.

534
00:23:37,246 --> 00:23:40,006
(BLOWS PITCHPIPE)

535
00:23:40,006 --> 00:23:41,846
# Bwa
# Ah

536
00:23:41,846 --> 00:23:43,646
# Bwa...
# Ah...

537
00:23:43,646 --> 00:23:45,806
# Bwa... #
(BLOWS PITCHPIPE)

538
00:23:45,806 --> 00:23:48,126
# Bap-ba-dap

539
00:23:48,126 --> 00:23:51,246
# Da-da-dap
Mmm, doo, da-da-dap

540
00:23:51,246 --> 00:23:53,086
# Mmm, doo, da-da-dap

541
00:23:53,086 --> 00:23:55,446
# Mmm, doo, da-da, da-da, da-da... #

542
00:23:55,446 --> 00:23:56,926
(WOMEN SNAP FINGERS)
(BLOWS PITCHPIPE)

543
00:23:56,926 --> 00:24:01,086
# Her love shines over my horizon

544
00:24:01,086 --> 00:24:03,966
# She's a slice of heaven

545
00:24:03,966 --> 00:24:08,326
# Warm moonlight over my horizon

546
00:24:08,326 --> 00:24:11,526
# She's a slice of heaven... #
(BLOWS PITCHPIPE)

547
00:24:11,526 --> 00:24:15,166
# Her love shines over my horizon

548
00:24:15,166 --> 00:24:17,846
# She's a slice of heaven... #

549
00:24:17,846 --> 00:24:19,286
Everyone.

550
00:24:19,286 --> 00:24:23,126
# Warm moonlight over my horizon

551
00:24:23,126 --> 00:24:27,206
# She's a slice of heaven... #
(BLOWS PITCHPIPE CONTINUOUSLY)

552
00:24:27,206 --> 00:24:30,206
# Ooh... #

553
00:24:30,206 --> 00:24:32,566
(BLOWS PITCHPIPE CONTINUOUSLY)

554
00:24:34,366 --> 00:24:36,006
(WOMEN LAUGH)

555
00:24:36,006 --> 00:24:40,006
That, sir, is the work
I've been doing. (LAUGHS)

556
00:24:40,006 --> 00:24:41,726
Well, thank you, ladies.

557
00:24:41,726 --> 00:24:43,806
That was not only unexpected...
ROZ: Mmm!

558
00:24:43,806 --> 00:24:45,686
..but also
a complete waste of my time.

559
00:24:45,686 --> 00:24:47,646
Oh.
Terry, sorry for your loss.

560
00:24:47,646 --> 00:24:51,446
Ray, you couldn't just call me,
explain what happened?

561
00:24:51,446 --> 00:24:53,126
Sorry, mate.
You know what she's like.

562
00:24:53,126 --> 00:24:55,686
I'm too busy for this sort of shit.
I know. I know you are.

563
00:24:55,686 --> 00:24:58,166
Thank you for coming in.
I really appreciate it, Terry.

564
00:24:58,166 --> 00:25:01,446
So the Sondheim's definitely in
and so's the Jesus Christ...

565
00:25:01,446 --> 00:25:03,646
She forgot to breathe!
I can't get any air.

566
00:25:03,646 --> 00:25:06,966
I can't get any air.
Here, here. Here.

567
00:25:10,966 --> 00:25:14,206
(SIGHS)

568
00:25:16,086 --> 00:25:19,766
(KNOCKS ON DOOR) Alice Pike is here
to sign some paperwork.

569
00:25:19,766 --> 00:25:21,846
No, I don't want to see her.
Get Ray to do it.

570
00:25:21,846 --> 00:25:24,446
He's not here.
Check the...stationery cupboard.

571
00:25:24,446 --> 00:25:26,086
Checked it. He's not there.

572
00:25:26,086 --> 00:25:29,206
Oh. Ooh! Ooh!
You know where he would be?

573
00:25:29,206 --> 00:25:30,686
(CAR DOOR OPENS)

574
00:25:30,686 --> 00:25:32,166
(PERSON SITS DOWN)

575
00:25:32,166 --> 00:25:33,646
(CAR DOOR SLAMS)
(GASPS)

576
00:25:33,646 --> 00:25:35,126
ALICE: Well, this is sad.

577
00:25:38,246 --> 00:25:39,646
(BELL RINGS)

578
00:25:40,646 --> 00:25:42,126
HELEN: Hi there.
WOMAN: Hi.

579
00:25:42,126 --> 00:25:44,326
I just wanted to return these books,
please. I, um...

580
00:25:44,326 --> 00:25:45,926
Got the receipt there?
Yeah.

581
00:25:45,926 --> 00:25:48,286
I bought them by accident. So...

582
00:25:49,406 --> 00:25:50,886
Is that hummus?

583
00:25:50,886 --> 00:25:52,806
Well, I don't think so.

584
00:25:52,806 --> 00:25:54,566
I can't take these back.
They're filthy.

585
00:25:54,566 --> 00:25:57,286
Well, I can't read them.
They're impenetrable.

586
00:26:02,446 --> 00:26:04,126
RAY: So, what did we think?

587
00:26:04,126 --> 00:26:06,366
Did anyone else get the sense
that the Shroud

588
00:26:06,366 --> 00:26:09,766
was like a metaphor
for the sins of man?

589
00:26:09,766 --> 00:26:11,246
No, mate. I thought it was shit.

590
00:26:11,246 --> 00:26:13,206
Thought we were doing the book
about the cuckold.

591
00:26:13,206 --> 00:26:14,486
I thought there'd be snacks.

592
00:26:15,886 --> 00:26:17,526
Shall we go to the pub?

593
00:26:17,526 --> 00:26:19,206
OTHERS: Yep. Yep.
Yep? Leave those.

594
00:26:19,206 --> 00:26:21,686
I'll whack 'em in recycling.

595
00:26:33,646 --> 00:26:36,286
Captions by Red Bee Media

596
00:26:36,286 --> 00:26:38,926
Copyright
Australian Broadcasting Corporation