- [Announcer] Previously on Slag Wars.
- Honestly, I'm so glad that we're doing this together.
- Obviously, it's a competition,
like, we are against each other, but, like,
if anybody else is gonna win other than me, like,
I want it to be her, do you know what I mean?
- I love you, bestie.
- My personal brand is super polished,
super glamorous, and pretty and poised and everything
all the time is totally a defense mechanism.
This is called Destroyers,
so I will definitely be bringing the sleeves.
- I definitely feel like the critiques that she gives us
is something that we can take back.
- Yeah, she gets it. - We're gonna get kinky
in tonight's first annual Kink Olympics.
- Could I please lick your shoes first?
- On your knees you go. - Thank you so much.
- Imagine that was my cum.
- (groaning) Oh! - JV is so funny.
- I do like a laugh.
It's all part of being a sub, is consented humiliation,
and he's got it to a tee. - It was a good event.
He was good and very that.
I was like, "Ooh, am I enjoying this a little too much."
- JV, your lips are worth the most with 25.5, well done.
- A 0.5 could save my hairy little ass,
but Mama's got a lot of points.
I'm gonna need my beauty rest.
(rousing fanfare music) (audience applauding)
(high heels clicking)
- And, see,
you thought I knew how to read.
That's called acting.
Greeks invented acting after they invented anal sex.
Speaking of Greeks, last week, we had the Kink Olympics.
Now let's check out the leaderboard.
Today, the Slags are going to test their porn acting skills.
Will the judges hit subscribe
or will they clear their browsing history?
Let's see. ♪ Slag Wars, whoa-oh-oh-oh
♪ We're the ones you wanna know ♪
♪ Slag Wars, whoa-oh-oh-oh
♪ Cock Destroyers run this show ♪
♪ Slag Wars, whoa-oh-oh-oh
♪ We're the ones you wanna know ♪
♪ Slag Wars, whoa-oh-oh-oh
♪ Cock Destroyers run this show ♪
♪ It's the motherfucking Slag House ♪
♪ Slag House
♪ Ooh
♪ Aah (upbeat music)
♪ Ooh
♪ Aah
- [Rebecca] Mama.
- Hi. - How are you today?
- Yeah, I'm great. - Are you enjoying yourself?
- Yeah, I'm having a lot of fun.
- We're at that pivotal point now and anything could change,
so I need to pull these Slags in one by one,
just make sure everything's okay.
Got any questions for me that can help you?
Mama is doing fantastic, but she could easily plateau
and somebody else could take the winning Slag's position.
- I don't know, I feel like sometimes when, like,
I'm away from the cameras and stuff, like,
I feel like I have all this energy.
- Yeah. - But I do feel like I get
a bit, like, in my head and, like, I feel like I freeze.
- I wouldn't think that at all
'cause you know you've got this.
Everybody has got this,
and it's that pressure, we all need that pressure.
We're going out of our comfort zone.
If in doubt, just ramp it up a bit more.
Fake it till you make it, no one fucking knows, you know?
I certainly haven't, so push the boundaries.
You know, this is a platform to just go crazy.
If there's any show that you can go absolutely crazy
and get away with it, it's Slag Wars.
- (chuckling) Yeah, that's true, that's true.
She told me not to get too comfortable,
but she also said she's been very impressed.
She said she didn't have any negative feedback,
which was really nice to hear.
- Go and enjoy the rest of your day.
I'll see you in the next challenge, and thank you so much.
It's been lovely getting to know you a bit better.
- Thank you.
- JV. - Hi.
- How are you, darling? - I'm doing really well.
This has been a like a dream.
- Right now, anybody can take this.
- It's a terrifyingly talented cast.
I am inspired, I'm horny.
I look up to you and Sophie so much
because you guys became a meme and whatever, like,
in the kind of public eye, right, when I was, like,
starting this kind of stuff. - Aw, I'll cry.
- This is the most kind of like starstruck
I've been or whatever. - Oh, thank you.
- No, genuinely. - Thank you.
- Every time I look at her, I almost evaporate,
and it's kind of like a dream come true.
- We know that you have got the funny bit.
We're always good at what we know.
What I want is push your boundaries a bit more,
something that I'm not expecting perhaps.
I can see he's having a lot of fun,
but I want JV to expand his boundaries and take risks.
I love laughter, I love mixing sex with fun.
- I can turn on, like, the sexy.
- Let's just fucking try it, taking risks is good.
So, I'm really looking forward to seeing
what else you've got. - Hearing her tell me
to push myself into other places that aren't, you know,
the funny or the smart, but, you know, sexy,
she's really pushed me. - You know where I am.
If you need to know what you need to do, I'm your gal, okay?
- I've got you, yeah. - So, enjoy.
- Thank you.
- Freyja, all of a sudden, you're catapulting.
- [Announcer] Is that like prolapsing?
- You've come into your own,
and I think that's really fantastic,
and I know that you struggled on the first night,
didn't you, a little bit?
And you've probably got in your own head,
so tell me a bit about what you've been going through.
- So, I think there's quite a bit
you don't really know about me.
I am autistic, so I do struggle with, like, a lot of anxiety
and, you know, I do get inside my head.
That's kind of who I am as a person.
- You're autistic, I'm ADHD, but you know what?
Sometimes they can be our superpowers.
- They can. - My ADHD
has, well, let's just say (chuckles) it's not great
for memory and concentration, but let me tell you,
that H in ADHD, that's powerful.
Don't let that get in your head.
You are incredibly unique. - It was really nice
to hear that she's neurodivergent as well.
I guess, like, big personalities,
like, it's sometimes a given.
I really resonate with what you're saying about using,
you know, our neurodivergence
as a superpower because it really is.
Like, it's everything I am.
It's how weird and unique I am.
It's how creative I am.
It's also how sensitive I am,
and sensitivity comes into sex work in a lot of ways.
These are all strengths, and I think it is
just reminding myself that they're strengths.
They're not, like, holding me back like it was in, like,
you know, when I was younger or something.
I think it was good for Rebecca
to know a little bit more about me
and show some vulnerability as well.
- So, it's been really, really lovely getting to know you.
I'm loving these massive eyelashes as well.
- Oh, thank you. I was just staring at yours. (chuckling)
- Braxton. - Hi, hi, mummy.
- Here we are.
I actually want to talk to you about yesterday's challenges.
- Yes. - I felt like
the Passion Project was a little bit dry.
I kind of know what you were going for.
I know this is a risk, a big risk.
Wear the fucking outfit that you had
for the Foreplay Challenge as the therapist,
as the aftercare.
Yeah, like, I know that's a risk, but I feel
that would've really gripped mine and Fanny's attention.
Like, this fucking psycho is trying to give me aftercare.
I wanna see all of my Slags succeed.
I don't want anyone falling off,
and I wanna make sure Braxton has got everything he needs
to be in with a winning chance.
- So, do you think the challenges that are upcoming now,
like, I should really just go for it?
- If you wanna fucking express yourself, go for it.
- After the conversation that I had with Rebecca,
I'm feeling like I know the direction
that she wants me to go in,
and I'm gonna take this criticism,
you know, I'm gonna take it to heart.
I'm gonna use this criticism. - Do your Slaggy best
deep within, and go for it. - Yeah.
I'm going for it, for sure. - Yeah.
- Right, it's a big day in the Slag House.
- [Rebecca] Sabrina, anybody can take this right now.
- I feel like I'm always, like, upper middle, lower middle.
Sometimes I don't have that, like, belief in myself.
I struggle with a bit of self-validation.
- When you did your first evening
and you're on that pole, what headspace do you get into
to get on that pole? - I tell myself
I've done this in a strip club in front of a load of men
who do not care and have no interest in me,
so doing this in front of my queers and family,
it's like- - And you know
you're absolutely amazing, don't you?
You know you're amazing, so all it is is it's a voice,
and that voice can really hold us back.
So, with these next challenges,
if your headspace is holding you back,
just go in and be like,
I am the fucking shit. - Full throttle.
- Bring all of those things that you're brilliant at,
throw it all at the table,
have fun. - I'm so excited.
I was quite open and vulnerable with her,
and it was quite nice that she was so receptive to that
and gave me such expert advice.
- Oscar. - Hey.
- It's so nice to have a one-to-one with you.
- It's wig day, because why the fuck not? (laughing)
- [Producer] Are you wearing it for all the confessionals?
- Do you think I should take it off?
Nah, I wanna keep mine on, why not?
It's just silly, like it's so silly.
Like, who the fuck cares? - Great.
- Cool. (laughs) (producer laughing)
This is insane and so fun. - You're doing great.
- But, like, I have no idea, like I feel like I'm doing,
like, really great in all the feedback from everyone else,
and then in the thing, I'm like, ah.
I don't know if you know this, I have autism,
so I don't always understand the brief.
- Yeah. - I take it, like,
very literal sometimes. - Got you.
- So, I feel like I'm, like, oh,
was I meant to be like that?
- But you're doing absolutely amazing.
Your brand is extremely classic, classy.
It would be nice to see something
a bit more crazy and different.
I wanna see what other angles we can get from you.
- Rebecca telling me to, like, amp things up
and to give more oomph and to not be so classic
and rigid was good advice.
- Anything can change right now.
- Yeah, I'm gonna have fun.
- So, yeah, have fun with it, and kill 'em.
- I really feel like I can do this.
It's just, I need to put my mind to it, you know?
- [Rebecca] Cocoa.
- Hey. - You are such a bundle
of joy. - Sitting that close
to Rebecca More is not only extremely intimidating,
but it is highly arousing. (laughs)
I feel like where I am in, like, the leaderboard,
I want to be way higher.
Like, I need to get my place in that finals.
I know, in me, I have it.
- Getting a fucking multimillion pound job with me,
as your life depends on it, just sell yourself to me
right now and tell me all your good points.
- I'm very committed to things.
- Yeah. - I'm like,
this is what I'm into, this is what I'm gonna do,
and if you don't like it, that's fine.
I don't worry that I'm gonna be judged
or anything, so that definitely works
in my favor in that sense. - Great.
I brought Cocoa here for a reason.
I saw something special in her, and I wanna see that.
We've still got time to see that coming out.
Whatever you're doing right now, ramp it right up.
Make everybody your competition now.
Kill the outfits, kill the details.
You know I'm looking at details.
I'm looking at your jewelry, I'm looking at everything.
Okay, smash it. - Slag space.
- [Rebecca] Slag space. (Cocoa laughing)
- It was so, so good to get that feedback from Rebecca.
It is so valuable to be able to actually hear
what she's looking for and what she thinks
about me and my performance.
- Damien, here we are. - Rebecca.
- I'm very fond of Damien,
but I wanna see another side to him.
Bring out that Cock Destroyer
and just get a little bit crazy, to be honest.
- I am a perfectionist
to, like, a crippling extent. - I can tell.
- And, yeah- - (laughing) I can tell.
- Yeah, does it show? - That could be a bit
of a downfall as well 'cause perfectionism,
there's no such thing, and it's problematic in us,
so we've gotta, like, let it go.
- Yeah. - I just wanna rough him up
a bit and just, "Fuck it, let it go
and just stop being so rigid."
Today, before you start doing your first challenge,
just have a bit of time to yourself in the mirror and go,
"I need to loosen up, stop being a fucking perfectionist,
and just go fucking crazy," do you know what I mean?
Shake it up, loosen up.
You want to fucking get to the top.
- I'm excited to bring it. - Yeah.
- And I'm starstruck to meet you, I'm not gonna lie.
- Thank you, Damien.
- I'm planning to basically go with second thought
because my default is always like, okay,
just keep it very, you know, this and that and do my job
and do it well and look pretty and whatever,
but I'm gonna just be absolutely
as loud and unhinged as I possibly can.
- [Announcer] Those were great doxy pep talks,
but our Slags better put that advice to use
in today's Foreplay Challenge.
- Slags, welcome to today's Foreplay Challenge.
(contestants cheering)
I've always used my platform to deliver a message,
and I wanna see these Slags use their platform
to deliver an important message about porn.
Millions of people enjoy watching all kinds of porn
all over the world, but sadly, a lot of people hide it,
and, in fact, there are some platforms
that you can't even say the word.
And so, today, Slags, you're gonna give me
and the judges an arousing speech about why porn
is absolutely awesome! (contestants cheering)
The winner of Slag Wars is gonna have
a huge platform to use, and I wanna see
how they're gonna use it for important topics.
- Porn has long been demonized as a gateway
to compulsive and pathological behavior.
Just like any other consumable material,
porn in itself is not inherently harmful.
In addition to creating lucrative job opportunities,
it can be used in a cum-load of fun and healthy ways.
- Porn creates so many opportunities.
Who else are we going to have film, direct?
We need a crew to help us with porn.
- You want me to get that report by three?
(breathing heavily) Okay.
(shouting) Aah!
Are you tired of being a slave to your desk job?
It's time to release that inner Slag.
Maybe you can be like me, from analyzing spreadsheets
to spunking on those bedsheets.
- My name is JV Marx,
and I'm here to talk about a silent killer
that is gripping our society.
I'm talking about male loneliness.
Luckily, we here at Slag Wars have an answer,
jacking off your cock to porn with the homies.
♪ P is for porn
♪ It's good for your soul
♪ And O is for orgasm
♪ R is for right fucking there
♪ And N is for nutting
- Welcome to Sabrina's Slutty School of Spelling.
P is for personality, (bright music)
pussy, and penis.
O is for oral, (bright music continues)
orgasms, and opportunities.
R is for rules, regulations, (bright music continues)
and regular people.
And N is for naughty,
nice, and nasty. (bright music continues)
- Lose the distractions from the day-to-day stressors,
let go of anxieties, and become consumed
with a universe of utter filth.
- Are you feeling dry?
Is your pussy musty?
Do you have cobwebs all over your muff?
Say, "Get fucked," to the dry spells days
because I'm here to give you all the boy pussy porn you need
to moisten that minge and drain those nuts.
(judges laughing)
Want to end your pain?
Improve your life now?
Go to my fan site now
to get your first fix. - This is why we need
more trans folks in politics.
- Slags, excellent job.
That was actually really,
really tight, but, Oscar, you are today's winner.
Well done. (all applauding)
- Thank you. - Oscar took my notes
and ran with it.
He really took this challenge
really seriously and smashed it.
Stepped outta your comfort zone.
- Yay, I really did, actually.
- You have gained an extra five points.
- Yay, I won something.
I finally fucking won something. (laughs)
Going back to, like, I do have autism,
so reading and writing isn't necessarily my specialty.
So, I'm really proud of myself with this.
- Slags, I love (dramatic music)
over-the-top porn acting.
Continuing with the theme,
today's challenge is all about adult content.
For today's Passion Project,
you're gonna be performing hilarious,
filthy porn scenes. (dramatic music continues)
- I felt a little bit of pressure because this is what I do.
So, I was worried that maybe Rebecca would say,
"Hey, Braxton, I'm expecting big from you.
This is porn, this is what you do."
- Two Slags are gonna be starring in "Booty Pirates".
These buccaneers wanna be fuckaneers.
When a group of pervy pirates find a buried treasure,
they are thrilled to find out it's spunk.
Two Slags will be in "Vampire Twinks: The ReTwinkening".
A new generation of vampire twinks are on the hunt,
but will they find a mortal to bite and bang?
Third team, two Slags,
"Super Hot Super Virgin Super Best Friends' First Time".
These two Slags are totally virgin.
This is their first time.
Seriously!
And the fourth and final scene is "Twerk-A-Tron's Revenge".
The scientist who created Twerky
may have created a monster.
- I'm really excited about this challenge.
I am fascinated by over-the-top bad acting.
- Oscar, as the winner of today's Foreplay Challenge,
it is down to you to assign the Slags.
- For the pirates scene,
I'm gonna pick Damien and Braxton.
- I think it's time for us to, you know, surprise everyone.
We're not the loudest in the house,
but we have the confidence that people
probably don't know that we have.
- For the vampires scene, I'm gonna pick JV and Freyja.
- I have been wanting to do something with Freyja
since the moment I laid eyes on that alien bitch.
- "Super Hot Super Virgin", I'm gonna pick myself
and Sabrina. - Very excited
because I'm obviously a virgin.
(Sabrina chuckles) - For the scientist scene,
I'm gonna pick Mama and Cocoa.
I am paired, finally, with my bestie, Mama Mamba.
We can finally do something together.
- They are gonna be directed by my good friend, Joey Mills.
His porn films go viral all the time.
He is truly the expert. (dramatic music)
There's a lot of videos of Joey on the internet,
but there's one in particular that I want these Slags
to be bringing, the "Elevator" one.
(dramatic music fades)
This is the kind of energy I want the Slags
to bring to their films.
All right, Slags!
- Lights! - Camera!
- Bonk!
(upbeat music)
- Hello, Slags. - Hi.
- How are we today? - Very good.
I'm so excited to have Joey Mills here.
What a treat. - What I've built my career on
is very big over-exaggerated faces,
reaction, where you're gonna make eye contact
with the camera, and in true Cock Destroyer fashion,
a catchphrase. - (chuckling) Okay.
Let's make this actually happen.
At this point, my faith is in his hands to guide us.
- This is our camera guy, Rich.
He's gonna be the camera that you're playing to.
Let's see a rehearsal.
Let's see what we've got so far.
- No, we don't have a lot- - A little rough patch.
- No, no, we did that right, okay.
(gasps) Oh, my God, have you heard about Twerky?
- What's happened with the turkey?
(both laughing) (clapperboard clicks)
- Bestie. - Come here, bestie.
- We need to work on this robot together, but first,
let's have some fun together.
(both moaning seductively)
- And cut. - What is in my mouth?
- My tongue ring! (Mama laughing loudly)
- More interaction with- - With Twerky.
- 'Cause that's what's turning you on.
- All right. - I wonder if Twerky
has a vibrating function. (clapperboard clicks)
- Yeah. - Ooh!
You're turning me on instead. - Oh, fuck, really?
- Yeah, really. - Oh, fuck.
- [Twerky] Boner.
- So, I'm gonna take this footage.
We're gonna give it to Rebecca, Matt, Fanny,
and we're all gonna judge it.
- Yay, thank you. - All right.
I'll see you guys in a bit. - Exciting, thank you so much.
I was a little bit nervous because, you know, we went fast,
so I wasn't sure, like, how other people were gonna do,
and, like, in this competition, anything can happen.
- Well, hello, you lovely Slags.
How are you today? - Hi, Joey.
- Do you guys have
the vampire challenge? - Yes.
- I'm super excited to play a vampire.
Me and JV came up with a really fun concept.
- I wake up on a couch.
I realize I've been transformed into a vampire twink.
She feeds me my twink dinner of blood, and I'm still hungry.
We have a little erotic foreplay,
but the foreplay is too hard for me and I disappear
into a poof of, like, vape smoke.
- Okay. (clapperboard clicks)
(JB snoring)
- Where am I? - I transformed you
into a vampire twink. - A vampire twink?
But I'm 25.
I thought 25 was twink death.
(suspenseful music) (clapperboard clicks)
- Aargh!
- I said no teeth.
Oh, no, I didn't say that, but no, no teeth.
(lively music) (clapperboard clicks)
- I think the twink death could be,
like, maybe one of the iconic lines.
- We were in love with our idea,
and we got Joey on board to help us out.
- When you do one of these,
maybe that could be your reaction moment.
- Yeah, like, aah!
- Let's start with another run-through real quick.
- Oh, now we need to find another twink. (sighs)
(bubbly music)
- I'll take this footage and let them deliberate.
- Joey was super helpful.
He's a consummate professional and an adorable twink.
- Well, hello, you sexy Slags.
- Hello. - Hey.
- Have you guys come up with any storylines?
- What if we weren't pirates anymore?
We weren't buccaneers, we were butt-caneers instead?
- Damien and I had this brilliant idea of being two pirates,
also, sick of our day jobs and thinking,
"Let's work our asses off and spunk the world together."
- But we need to find some booty to have enough money
to quit our day jobs and pursue our dreams.
- Do you wanna do a little run-through,
just a little quick improv, see what we're working with?
- Let's do it. (clapperboard clicks)
- Aye, all this swashbuckling and looting and pillaging
has really made me tired, and also a little bit horny.
- I miss my wife, sir. - Your wife?
- Yes. - The one with the peg leg?
- What was her name again? - Peggy.
Let's land this ship.
Oh, what's this over here? - I think this is spunk.
- Is that spunk? - It's spunk.
- Open it up. - Oh!
I think I'm gonna blow. - I think he's ready
to quit his day job. (Braxton groaning)
Oh, that's right, that's right.
Who's my nasty butt-caneer?
I took her notes to heart and applied them
to today's challenge. - When you do the catchphrase,
make sure to really accentuate it.
We're gonna be the butt-caneers!
- We're gonna be the butt-caneers!
- Yeah. - Butt-caneers!
- Okay.
Well, hello, you gorgeous, gorgeous Slags.
- Hey, Joey. - Hello.
- Your guys' challenge is virgins.
- I got "Super Hot Super Virgin
Super Best Friends' First Time (For Real)".
I picked this because I think it's easy
and fun and silly to play with.
- So, run me through what you guys have.
- I'm gonna start by revealing I'm a virgin,
and I'm kind of giving the energy of, am I a virgin?
But, like, kind of really convincing myself.
- I'm kind of like,
"Oh, yeah, no, I am totally a virgin too, like,
we should totally try it out." - Trying to relate
to each other even though you're both lying.
- Yeah, we're both lying.
I don't know why you're lying, but I'm tryna lie to fuck.
- I have no reason for lying, I just look a bit weird.
- She just likes to be innocent.
There's nothing wrong with that.
- It's definitely up my alley, and I'm a silly person,
so I know I could get really silly with this.
- All right, let's go ahead.
(clapperboard clicks)
- Oh, Oscar, I have a secret.
- What kind of secret?
- I'm a virgin. (Oscar gasping)
I've never had the sex before.
I've got a pinprick pussy.
Nothing fits in there.
- Not even this? - No.
- Sorry. (clapperboard clicks)
I actually have something better that I think will work.
You have micro genitalia.
I actually do, too.
I have a micro penis. - Oh, my God!
- That means we're compatible.
We can make this work.
- (laughing) Stop laughing.
The cameraman laughed. (clapperboard clicks)
- And also, yeah, I also am a virgin, too.
Yeah, I've never had the sex.
We can just start with kissing.
- [Sabrina] Okay. (slurping)
- And you said you're a virgin?
- Yes!
- Oh, of course, yeah.
Definitely.
- Yeah, that was so funny. - Thank you, all right.
- That was so funny. - All right.
So, that was great.
I'll be taking this footage upstairs,
and we'll let them deliberate.
- Joey was so receptive to everything,
and I feel like he really enjoyed it, which is great.
- Oh, my God! (chuckles)
(upbeat music)
(upbeat music continues)
- I am so excited about this one.
It's a near and dear one for you and I,
isn't it? - Aargh, I'm so excited
to see this. - Absolutely.
It is time for the next deliberation.
I haven't seen these yet,
so I can't wait to watch the videos.
They had some great topics.
Do you know what?
I've gotta stop.
(chuckles) Fanny. - Huh?
- You and I, I know we're getting really close
and we're getting on super well,
but do you have your finger up my ass right now?
- What?
I wouldn't dare! (laughing) - Whoa!
- What? - What is that?
It's Joey. (laughing)
Joey! - Joey!
- Good God, it's hot under there.
- What are you doing under there?
- I just wanted to help. - Well, anyway,
you can stick around and help us out with this, okay?
- Perfect. - I've had my summer intern
edit all of the footage together in a snap.
Let's watch it.
- [Announcer] "Twerk-A-Tron's Revenge".
- Oh, my God, bestie!
- Bestie, what's wrong? - Did you hear about Twerky?
- What's happened to Twerky?
- He's gone bad, we need to teach him a lesson.
- Let's go see.
(both grunting)
You like that, Twerky? - Yeah?
Maybe if I try and turn down your badness.
- Oh, you're turning me on instead.
- Is that true, bestie? - Yeah, it's true.
- Oh, wow! - Wow!
(slow seductive music)
We need to work on this robot together, but first,
let's have some fun together.
(both moaning softly)
(robot whirring) (moaning intensifying)
(all laughing)
- Okay, Joey, you were there for real, tell me everything.
- I think the hardest part for them was they had the robot,
like them finding a way to incorporate it.
- As far as I'm concerned, it's a huge advantage.
They could've just been totally crazy Cock Destroyers,
smash the thing up, go viral, but they didn't.
Matt, what do you think?
- Interacting with an inanimate object like that,
it's not easy to make it look sexy, so.
- But, Matt, you've interacted
with a strange, large object before.
- It is difficult interacting with an inanimate object
that looks just like you.
It's quite haunting, and I have nightmares
about it frequently. (Rebecca laughing)
- We got three more.
Let's see the next one. - All right.
(dramatic orchestral music)
- All that swashbuckling and looting and pillaging
has made me really tired, and also a little bit horny.
It really makes me miss me wife back home.
You know, the one with the peg leg.
- What was her name again? - Peggy.
- Oh, she knows my girlfriend,
Fellatio Felicia. - Oh, that's right.
You know, I'm really tired of being a pirate sometimes.
I wish I could maybe be something else.
Maybe if we found enough booty, we could quit our day jobs.
- And become butt-caneers!
(Rebecca laughing)
- Ooh!
I think we're there.
Now, where would you hide booty
if you were hiding booty? - I think this is it, sir.
I think this is what we've been looking for.
- Well, let's open it up, hurry up!
(gasps) Is that- - It is, sir.
It's spunk. (Rebecca laughing)
- Well, I think we're ready to be butt-caneers.
Please open the spunk. - Oh, my God.
- Give it to me, aah!
- Oh, God, sir. (Damien grunting)
- Squirt that spunk. (grunts) - Oh, sir.
- I think we're ready to quit our day jobs.
- Joey, you were there.
- They gave some of the most creative jokes.
- I was excited to see how Braxton would perform
on this challenge, and he actually really pulled it off.
He did a really good job.
- I am very, very shocked to see Braxton act like this.
I'm really proud of him.
- He played really well with Damien.
There was great chemistry.
- Both these boys took my advice and ran with it.
Because we had that chat earlier,
I think I should take all the credit for this one.
(all laughing)
Let's see the next. - All right.
(dramatic instrumental music) ♪ Aah, Vampire Twinks, aah
(JV moaning)
- Oh!
Where am I?
- You're my new twink vampire.
- I'm 25.
I thought 25 was twink death.
- I've made you some twink dinner.
- Twink dinner.
Oh, I can't wait.
(suspenseful music) (blood dripping)
(JV gobbling)
I think I'm turning visexual. (moaning)
- No teeth. - Oh!
- Get down right now.
(Freyja grunting) (knife slashing)
(Rebecca laughing)
(scoffs) Now we need to find another twink.
(suspenseful music)
(Matt laughing) - Lovely.
- I do like that they kinda came in
and had ideas with special effects
and how they wanted certain things shot.
- It's definitely strong, and it made me laugh.
- It was very porno.
I feel like these two really know their porn.
The ending with Freyja, she clearly watches
a decent amount of porn, doesn't she?
But more than that, she needs to change her look up.
If I was doing the scene, I would've gone through
all those other Slags cases, got some bloody fishnets,
and just jazzed myself up a bit.
- I am very big on facial expressions,
and I think that JV has that in the bag.
- And that's the most important part, I would say,
especially with ad scenes, straight into the camera
with his face, phenomenal.
- Well, the Slags aren't making it easy
for us tonight, now are they?
Matt, let's watch the final one.
- [Matt] All right.
♪ Super Hot Super Virgin
♪ Super Best Friends' First Time For Real ♪
- Hey, Oscar, I have a secret
to tell you. - What kind of secret?
- I'm a virgin.
I've got a pinprick pussy.
I've never had
the sex before. - So, not this?
- Absolutely not! - And not this?
- I said I'm a virgin.
(all laughing)
- Not even this?
- No. - I actually have
something better that I think will work.
You have micro genitalia.
I actually do, too.
I have a micropenis. - Oh, my God!
- That means we're compatible.
We can make this work. - Okay.
- Why don't you try?
(Rebecca laughs)
Whoa, you know what?
It's actually getting really, really hot
in here, don't you think?
I'm gonna strip off. - Oh, wow.
Well, maybe I should take off my outfit, too.
- [Oscar] Yeah, it's getting very hot in here.
- Okay.
Now, I don't know if this is something appropriate
to do the sex. - You're a virgin, right?
- [Sabrina] Come this way.
(both moaning) (upbeat music)
♪ Super Hot Super Virgin
♪ Super Best Friends' First Time For Real ♪
- I love how it just stops there.
We're left on a fucking cliffhanger!
- It's actually super hot, and I was like,
"Oh, I can't wait to see where this goes."
- I was about to give Joey a handjob over here.
- Me, too! - I was so turned on!
- That's amazing, but especially to come in with a storyline
of why we're hiding it from each other,
and then to have this idea of, oh, well,
this makes us compatible actually.
I think it all worked out very well.
Pinprick pussy, amazing! - Pinprick pussy.
Sabrina, amazing delivery.
Like, if I was scrolling through Twitter,
this would definitely have got my attention.
- This is hard, like, this is really, really hard.
- You know what else is hard?
- What? - This guy.
- (chuckling) Ooh!
Well, I think we should leave Matt
with the content to enjoy himself.
Let's go get ready and let's go and enjoy the evening.
Wow, what a challenge near and dear to my heart,
that we've gotta get these points assigned.
(Matt whistling)
(dramatic music)
- It's another Golden Lips Ceremony.
I thought I did great, but you never know.
- Slags, welcome to the Golden Lips Ceremony.
You Slags made it really, really difficult for us
because they were all so good,
and I'm very impressed with those of you
who took on board my advice.
Freyja, one thing that stood out to me is the outfits,
but I feel that you could've really changed the look.
We're kind of getting the same looks regarding the outfits.
Your lips are worth 17 points, Freyja.
(contestants applauding)
- I've made it this far, I can do better,
and, you know, tomorrow's a new day.
- JV Marx, this was so porno. (upbeat music)
Some of the actions you were doing were great.
I really love your over-the-top, your humor.
JB Marx, well done, and your lips
are worth 17 points. (contestants applauding)
- I didn't think that I was gonna want to win this bad,
but I do.
I wanna win real bad.
- Cocoa Kink, the pair of you, you kind of played it safe.
I know it was difficult to have a prop like a robot
and making that sexy, but go for it.
You could've destroyed the robot,
pissed off all the production.
I would've been laughing,
but you would've been right up at the top.
- Listen, if I see that robot, it's on site,
I'm gonna break him up in half, and I'm gonna show Rebecca
and say, "Now look." (laughing)
- Cocoa Kink, your lips tonight are worth 18 points.
(contestants applauding) Well done.
- Honestly, moving forward, unless you don't want it broken,
you'd better put a sticker on it or something
'cause I'll just break everything in this set
if it's gonna make me win.
- Mama Mamba, Twerk-A-Thon,
whether he was involved or not, I don't know.
I think the opportunity was definitely there.
More messy, more nasty would've been nice.
Your lips are worth 18. (contestants applauding)
- She wants to see us get more messy, more nasty,
and I'm like, "Okay, yeah, I can definitely do that."
So, that's what I'm gonna be bringing next time.
- Damien Lenore, I really feel that you took my advice
on board and you absolutely smashed this.
You had me laughing because it was a new side to you.
I've been hearing you a bit more vocal.
Tonight, your lips, Damien, are worth 23 points.
Congratulations. (contestants applauding)
- The fact that I was trying to be funny
and do something like hammy and silly
and it played and I, like, got praise for it
was really an awesome feeling.
- Braxton Cruz, I loved that you wore the wig in this.
It was a home run.
I would've been gutted if you hadn't.
You really fucking stepped your game up, and I'm so happy.
So, well done, Braxton.
You should be really proud of yourself.
Your lips are worth 23. (contestants applauding)
Well done.
- I feel like I was maybe coasting before,
and to now finish this week off on a high just makes me feel
like I'm going to attack it tomorrow and be even slaggier.
- Oscar, very, very sexy when you stripped off, I loved it.
This one was the porno, it had everything.
Super proud of you, and your lips are worth 24 points.
- I'm really glad that I was able to take her critiques on.
I put a lot of pressure on myself, and this challenge,
I could finally just actually let go.
- Sabrina, you shone in this. (upbeat music continues)
It was absolutely brilliant.
I was like, I don't think she's a virgin, you know?
- I'm glad I lost my virginity on the show.
- Exactly! (Matt laughing)
Sabrina, you smashed this one,
and your lips are worth 25 points.
- [Oscar] Hey! (contestants applauding)
- I'm skeet, skeet, skeeting my way up.
- Slags, you had better rest up tonight
because tomorrow we're getting down to business.
I need these Slags to get to bed, get a good night's sleep
and a good wank, and I'll see them tomorrow.
So, until then,
go de-spunk the world! (contestants cheering)
- (chanting) Sabrina, Sabrina, Sabrina, hey!
Sabrina, Sabrina, Sabrina, hey, Sabrina, Sabrina, Sabrina!
- After today, I'm in second place, and that's promising.
- Sabrina, Sabrina, oh. (contestants laughing)
- Come here, baby girl.
- [Announcer] After tonight's Golden Lips Ceremony,
here's where our Slags sit on the leaderboard.
(lively instrumental music)
(lively instrumental music continues)
Next time on Slag Wars. - You will be repeating
all of your Passion Projects back to back in one afternoon!
- I think it's gonna be really fuckin' messy.
- I'm so fuckin' excited, let's do it, bitch!
- It's sure gonna be a wild ride.
(upbeat electronic music)
(upbeat electronic music continues)
(upbeat electronic music fades)
(logo swishing)
- [Announcer] Ooh, daddy.