1 00:00:04,040 --> 00:00:05,320 Ooh-hoo-hoo. 2 00:00:10,560 --> 00:00:11,280 Aargh! 3 00:00:12,040 --> 00:00:14,240 My name's Paul Williams. 4 00:00:14,280 --> 00:00:15,960 Oh! 5 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:20,560 Oh! 6 00:00:21,680 --> 00:00:23,680 Hiyah! 7 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:29,840 www.able.co.nz Copyright Able 2022 8 00:00:33,120 --> 00:00:38,040 Kia ora koutou! Welcome to episode seven of Taskmaster Season Three. 9 00:00:38,040 --> 00:00:40,840 I'm Jeremy Wells, TV's lovable bad boy 10 00:00:40,840 --> 00:00:46,560 that after years of media experience and emotional maturing came good... 11 00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:53,840 ...only to turn bad again as the devilish dictator that you all know as the Taskmaster. 12 00:00:56,640 --> 00:01:00,360 Sitting here with us tonight are five of my most promising 13 00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:02,440 subjugated citizens... 14 00:01:02,440 --> 00:01:04,520 ...following my orders to the death ― 15 00:01:04,520 --> 00:01:08,080 or at least until you at home get a little chuckle ― 16 00:01:08,080 --> 00:01:10,600 Chris Parker... 17 00:01:10,600 --> 00:01:13,160 ...Josh Thomson... 18 00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:15,520 ...Justine Smith... 19 00:01:15,520 --> 00:01:18,000 ...Kura Forrester... 20 00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:20,800 ...and Paul Ego! 21 00:01:20,800 --> 00:01:24,360 Helping me keep these oppressed souls in check 22 00:01:24,360 --> 00:01:28,480 is a man who can quite literally survive anything thrown at him. 23 00:01:28,480 --> 00:01:31,280 But I've been asked not to test that theory too thoroughly. 24 00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:34,960 It's Paul Williams! 25 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:37,320 Start us off, please. 26 00:01:37,320 --> 00:01:39,960 As always, we'll start with a prize task. 27 00:01:39,960 --> 00:01:45,280 This week, the contestants were asked to bring in the best thing on a stick. 28 00:01:45,280 --> 00:01:47,840 Some of the best things in my life come on a stick, 29 00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:50,560 so, uh, let's see what we have on offer ― 30 00:01:50,560 --> 00:01:52,640 starting with Chris. 31 00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:58,000 For me, the best thing that you can get on a stick 32 00:01:58,200 --> 00:02:00,400 is the humble 33 00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:04,080 fish and chip hot dog. 34 00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:07,600 There is a simple pleasure in a highly processed piece of animal 35 00:02:07,600 --> 00:02:08,960 on a stick, isn't there? 36 00:02:08,960 --> 00:02:10,000 Yeah. Oh my God. 37 00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:12,600 And then cover that in some strange batter ― 38 00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:14,680 but don't pre-sauce it. 39 00:02:14,680 --> 00:02:15,800 All right, Josh. 40 00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:20,600 What separates the good from the great... 41 00:02:20,600 --> 00:02:23,080 ...is their willingness to sacrifice. 42 00:02:23,080 --> 00:02:26,920 I am, of course, talking about my best thing on a stick ― 43 00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:32,880 Olympic medallist Eliza McCartney. 44 00:02:32,880 --> 00:02:37,000 No one thought a teenager from the North Shore of little old per-capita New Zealand 45 00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:40,960 would snatch away a medal from the 2016 Rio Olympics, but snatch she did ― 46 00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:45,040 and she snatched it away from an Australian, and she took a medal when she was 19. 47 00:02:45,040 --> 00:02:47,960 When I was 19, I thought two-minute noodles was the amount of time 48 00:02:47,960 --> 00:02:50,280 you had to eat it in. 49 00:02:50,280 --> 00:02:52,320 - Paul, what did you bring in? - Oh, well, 50 00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:54,720 some people may know that I'm the voice of one of New Zealand's 51 00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:57,520 leading large yellow supermarket chains. 52 00:02:57,520 --> 00:03:02,400 So I've made my own Stickman on a stick. Aww! 53 00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:03,920 So this is... 54 00:03:03,920 --> 00:03:05,440 me. - That's you! 55 00:03:05,440 --> 00:03:07,960 Gidday, Taskmaster. 56 00:03:07,960 --> 00:03:09,640 You're much hotter in person. 57 00:03:09,640 --> 00:03:12,000 If you came to my place, it'd be meat week every night. 58 00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:18,200 I assume you're being paid for this promotion? 59 00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:20,600 Oh, fuck, yeah. Heaps. 60 00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:22,440 - No, I'm not. - Justine, what did you bring in? 61 00:03:22,440 --> 00:03:26,600 So, I bought in what may seem quite boring ― it's a memory stick. 62 00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:30,720 My grandad made a cassette tape of my sister and I on every birthday. 63 00:03:30,720 --> 00:03:34,720 On this stick is a little recording of little Jussie singing a little song, 64 00:03:34,720 --> 00:03:37,680 and I believe we have a photo and the soundtrack... 65 00:03:37,680 --> 00:03:41,880 ♪ Little Peter Rabbit had a fly upon his nose. 66 00:03:42,120 --> 00:03:45,720 ♪ Little Peter Rabbit had a fly upon his nose, 67 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:47,840 ♪ And he flipped it and he flopped it 68 00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:51,040 ♪ and it flew right away. # 69 00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:54,080 It's a bit Chucky. Yeah. 70 00:03:54,080 --> 00:03:55,880 - I'm just gonna say that. - Ooh, OK. 71 00:03:55,880 --> 00:04:00,120 You've hurt me before on this show, but not as much as that. 72 00:04:00,120 --> 00:04:02,120 Kura. 73 00:04:02,120 --> 00:04:05,800 OK, I'll just bring it back up. 74 00:04:06,720 --> 00:04:09,240 My favourite thing on a stick ― it's absolutely this ― 75 00:04:09,240 --> 00:04:13,080 you can't walk past meat on a stick and not get it, 76 00:04:13,080 --> 00:04:14,800 cos it's the best way to eat meat. 77 00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:18,040 So I brought in chicken satay on a stick. 78 00:04:18,040 --> 00:04:19,920 That― I bought it a while ago. - Yeah. 79 00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:22,360 - He's not happy. - Looks like someone's vomited on it. 80 00:04:22,360 --> 00:04:23,720 - Yeah, it does. - Was that me? 81 00:04:23,720 --> 00:04:26,640 - Some flicks of carrot. - Well, because then I thought, 'Well, you always need dessert 82 00:04:26,640 --> 00:04:28,920 'after a good feed of chicken on a stick.' 83 00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:31,720 So I put some of your favourite lollies on a stick ― 84 00:04:31,720 --> 00:04:34,120 pineapple lumps and aeroplanes on a stick. 85 00:04:34,120 --> 00:04:36,840 - Yum. - So I thought, 'What else could go well on a stick?' 86 00:04:36,840 --> 00:04:38,800 Scratchies on a stick. 87 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:41,120 This took me ages. 88 00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:42,400 And then I was like, 'Oh, 89 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:47,080 'I may as well just chuck some money on a stick.' 90 00:04:47,080 --> 00:04:50,000 - Like it. - A lot of time, a lot of effort. 91 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:51,840 But what's the best thing on a stick? 92 00:04:51,840 --> 00:04:54,480 That's four things. But what's the best? 93 00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:56,480 Money. 94 00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:59,400 - You're going with money? - Yeah, cos I can tell you don't like my chicken vomit. 95 00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:03,040 So I'm going with money on a stick! 96 00:05:03,040 --> 00:05:05,600 - OK. Paul, I'm gonna go one for you. - Thanks, mate. 97 00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:09,120 I think it was really the best thing that's happened to your bank account... 98 00:05:09,120 --> 00:05:11,400 ...rather than actually 99 00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:14,440 what's gonna happen to me. - He's not wrong. 100 00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:16,240 Kura, I'll go two points... 101 00:05:16,240 --> 00:05:17,800 - Thank you. - ...cos of the money on a stick. 102 00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:19,840 Chris, I go three points for you. - Yeah. 103 00:05:19,840 --> 00:05:24,960 Because I don't trust anyone who eats a hotdog over the age of 14. Yeah, that's fair. 104 00:05:24,960 --> 00:05:28,760 Four points for you, Justine, cos I love your grandad with the banjolele; 105 00:05:28,760 --> 00:05:30,560 and five for you, Josh. 106 00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:32,360 Congratulations. - Five for Eliza! 107 00:05:32,360 --> 00:05:33,960 For Eliza! - Eliza McCartney. 108 00:05:33,960 --> 00:05:35,960 You can't go past Eliza. 109 00:05:36,360 --> 00:05:39,240 Very nice. Well, that was a beautiful entree, 110 00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:41,240 but I'm ready for some larger portions. 111 00:05:41,240 --> 00:05:44,720 Paul, can you use your little machine there to show us what's up next? 112 00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:48,040 I sure can. Here's a task ― and, for obvious reasons, 113 00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:50,680 one of my favourite tasks of the season. 114 00:05:57,040 --> 00:05:58,680 Ah. 115 00:05:58,680 --> 00:06:00,480 Hellooo? 116 00:06:01,600 --> 00:06:02,720 - Hello. - Hi, Paul. 117 00:06:02,720 --> 00:06:04,200 This is cosy, innit? 118 00:06:04,200 --> 00:06:05,080 Is that the task? 119 00:06:05,080 --> 00:06:06,960 And what's happened here? That's not the proper thing. 120 00:06:06,960 --> 00:06:09,440 Why is it on lined paper? Did we run out of the good paper? 121 00:06:09,440 --> 00:06:11,240 Yeah, we ran out of the nice paper. 122 00:06:11,240 --> 00:06:13,240 Oh no. 123 00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:17,360 'Give Paul money. 124 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:18,760 'Most money wins. 125 00:06:18,760 --> 00:06:20,120 'You have 10 minutes. 126 00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:22,520 'Your time starts―' Is this real? 127 00:06:22,520 --> 00:06:24,440 Finish reading the task, please. 128 00:06:24,440 --> 00:06:25,480 Is this real? 129 00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:27,040 'Your time starts now.' 130 00:06:27,040 --> 00:06:29,120 There's something fishy going on. 131 00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:31,320 Well, I explained we ran out of the nice paper. 132 00:06:31,320 --> 00:06:34,480 - Yeah, but why didn't you have the wax stamp? - We lost that. 133 00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:37,280 Is this your handwriting? You're a serial killer. 134 00:06:37,280 --> 00:06:38,120 I'm gonna do it, though. 135 00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:42,200 - I guess― Shall we get you some money? - Yes, please. 136 00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:45,320 Justine, have you seen a serial killer's handwriting before? 137 00:06:45,320 --> 00:06:49,240 No, but I imagine if― it would be Paul's, if I ever did see it. 138 00:06:49,240 --> 00:06:53,000 It was, like, really small, scratchy, tense ― like, unhappy. 139 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:57,720 I can't believe how sceptical you were, Kura, because― 140 00:06:57,720 --> 00:06:58,920 what did you think that Paul's done, 141 00:06:58,920 --> 00:07:01,560 is he's infiltrated the Taskmaster set 142 00:07:01,560 --> 00:07:04,680 and then he's gone and decided to handwrite one and just chuck in a task 143 00:07:04,680 --> 00:07:06,360 so he can make some money on the side for himself? 144 00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:08,600 Is that what you were thinking? - 100%. 145 00:07:10,320 --> 00:07:12,920 Who do we get to see first, my debt-riddled friend? 146 00:07:12,920 --> 00:07:18,360 This first clip is rich in people. It's Josh, Kura, Justine and Chris. 147 00:07:18,360 --> 00:07:20,080 What are we gonna do? - What do you mean? 148 00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:22,400 - We gotta get some money. - What, you― you don't have any money? 149 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:23,200 No. 150 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:26,560 - Why do I have to give you money? - Well, it's the task. 151 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:28,760 I don't feel like you've done much for it, though. 152 00:07:28,760 --> 00:07:30,760 How long do I have? - You've got nine minutes 153 00:07:30,760 --> 00:07:32,320 and 10 seconds. - I'll be back. 154 00:07:32,320 --> 00:07:33,880 Holy gosh. I might check my wallet. 155 00:07:33,880 --> 00:07:36,560 How much do you think the others will give? 156 00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:38,560 Justine has a good heart, 157 00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:39,880 but she won't give you anything. 158 00:07:39,880 --> 00:07:42,560 Especially on here. 159 00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:44,440 - Thank you. - It's 50 bucks. 160 00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:46,600 - So you're happy with that? - Yeah, I'm― I'm OK with that, 161 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:49,560 because I would be surprised if those other tightwads on the show 162 00:07:49,560 --> 00:07:51,720 have actual cash money in their wallets. 163 00:07:51,720 --> 00:07:54,200 It's not― It's not just cash. 164 00:07:54,960 --> 00:07:57,760 Why are you looking at me like that? - Cos I don't understand, really. 165 00:07:57,760 --> 00:08:01,680 If it's not just cash... - There's other ways of paying money. 166 00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:03,920 Well, I don't have a fucking chequebook, do I? 167 00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:07,280 Do you have a mobile EFTPOS machine? - Yeah. 168 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:09,280 - Doyou? - Yeah. 169 00:08:10,880 --> 00:08:14,080 - You don'thaveto give money. - What could I do instead? 170 00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:16,280 Oh, yuck. I'm not doing that, Paul. 171 00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:18,480 - I-I was just meaning lose― - Are you... 172 00:08:18,480 --> 00:08:20,480 - ...lose the task. - ...trying to force me to... 173 00:08:20,480 --> 00:08:22,040 - I was just saying― - ...do things to you? 174 00:08:22,040 --> 00:08:24,040 $500. 175 00:08:24,400 --> 00:08:27,880 I don't really wanna give you $500, though. 176 00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:28,960 You've got just over a minute. 177 00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:30,440 Ahhh! 178 00:08:30,440 --> 00:08:32,360 Ahhhhh! Iamputting in the particulars. 179 00:08:32,360 --> 00:08:34,440 $150. 180 00:08:34,560 --> 00:08:35,320 OK. 181 00:08:35,320 --> 00:08:37,240 Just swipe or insert, please. 182 00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:39,240 Got you some money. 183 00:08:41,640 --> 00:08:43,400 - Is this money? - Yeah. 184 00:08:43,400 --> 00:08:45,160 - Gift card? - It's a Prezzy card. 185 00:08:45,160 --> 00:08:47,960 - How much did you transfer? - $75. 186 00:08:48,200 --> 00:08:50,560 OK, so that's $200 altogether I gave you. 187 00:08:50,560 --> 00:08:52,160 Do you think anyone's gonna beat that? 188 00:08:52,160 --> 00:08:54,320 If they do, I'm gonna get physically violent with them. 189 00:08:54,320 --> 00:08:55,960 How much did you give me? 190 00:08:55,960 --> 00:08:57,920 $780,000. 191 00:08:57,920 --> 00:08:59,040 - No, you didn't. - OK. 192 00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:01,040 I saw what it said. 193 00:09:01,160 --> 00:09:02,960 $101. 194 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:05,880 - Why 101? - Just in case someone gave you $100. 195 00:09:05,880 --> 00:09:07,680 - And how much is it? - 100 bucks. 196 00:09:07,680 --> 00:09:10,000 I'm just trying to think what I'm gonna tell my wife. 197 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:13,880 I might have to pretend we're having an affair. 198 00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:14,560 OK. 199 00:09:14,560 --> 00:09:16,360 Who do you think will give me the most? 200 00:09:16,360 --> 00:09:17,560 Probably Paul Ego. 201 00:09:17,560 --> 00:09:18,760 Paul's pretty rich. 202 00:09:18,760 --> 00:09:20,160 Paul's got that old radio money. 203 00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:22,880 - He's got that old radio money. - He's got that old radio money. 204 00:09:22,880 --> 00:09:26,080 Whereas the new radio money, they just give you Prezzy cards. 205 00:09:29,760 --> 00:09:31,880 You were a little bit disappointed, Justine, 206 00:09:31,880 --> 00:09:34,360 when Paul pulled out the EFTPOS machine. I could see it in your face. 207 00:09:34,360 --> 00:09:36,160 - Yeah. - You were like, 'He's not gonna have that.' 208 00:09:36,160 --> 00:09:37,400 Well, I was a bit worried too, 209 00:09:37,400 --> 00:09:40,480 cos it was, like, quite a financial slumpy time of my life, 210 00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:42,960 and I was like, 211 00:09:42,960 --> 00:09:44,760 You were also the only person that seemed to have cash, 212 00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:47,920 which is interesting, cos I know what people use cash to pay for nowadays. 213 00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:49,920 It's drugs. 214 00:09:50,520 --> 00:09:51,440 It's not. 215 00:09:52,480 --> 00:09:55,520 Josh, smart ― $101. See, I know what you've done there. 216 00:09:55,520 --> 00:09:57,800 At one point, I was gonna give Paul quite a lot of money, 217 00:09:57,800 --> 00:10:01,280 but then I... like my family. 218 00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:02,800 So I didn't do it. 219 00:10:02,800 --> 00:10:07,720 - Kura, you settled for 75. - Yeah. I don't have a child or a family, so... 220 00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:09,800 And I gave the least. 221 00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:11,720 I just thought, 'That'll do.' 222 00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:13,320 How much did everyone give, exactly? 223 00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:15,640 - Yeah, so, Kura gave $75... - Yeah. 224 00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:17,400 ...Chris $100, 225 00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:19,400 Josh $101 226 00:10:19,520 --> 00:10:21,880 and Justine $200. 227 00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:23,160 Wow. 228 00:10:23,160 --> 00:10:26,240 Now it comes down to old radio money. 229 00:10:26,240 --> 00:10:28,760 That old radio money. 230 00:10:28,760 --> 00:10:32,000 Let's see if Mr Stickman has deep pockets. 231 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:35,600 'Give Paul money.' What a load of bullshit. 232 00:10:35,840 --> 00:10:39,120 He seems like a man who's easily fooled. 233 00:10:45,960 --> 00:10:47,640 There you go. 234 00:10:47,640 --> 00:10:49,640 $3.30. 235 00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:53,040 They look like some etchings you've done with a crayon. 236 00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:54,520 There's a reason for that. 237 00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:56,040 That's what they are. 238 00:10:56,040 --> 00:10:58,760 Cos ― I'm sorry, Paul ― I'm not giving you any money. 239 00:10:58,760 --> 00:11:00,360 I mean, look at the way you're dressed. 240 00:11:00,360 --> 00:11:02,680 Clearly, you either own a stables 241 00:11:02,680 --> 00:11:04,960 or you're a slave owner from the 1800s. 242 00:11:04,960 --> 00:11:07,120 I don't own a stables. 243 00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:08,680 Thought it was the second one. 244 00:11:08,680 --> 00:11:11,080 So you've given me $3.30... 245 00:11:11,240 --> 00:11:13,440 Rubbings of $3.30. Yeah. 246 00:11:14,480 --> 00:11:15,680 Sorry, P. Willie. 247 00:11:15,680 --> 00:11:18,480 - Thank you, Paul. - You'll have to find money somewhere else. 248 00:11:18,480 --> 00:11:20,320 Couldn't have gone better. 249 00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:21,800 Wow. 250 00:11:21,800 --> 00:11:24,560 A fool and his money are soon parted. 251 00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:31,680 The thing is ― you etched some coins. 252 00:11:31,680 --> 00:11:34,080 - Yeah. - You could've drawn... 253 00:11:34,080 --> 00:11:36,080 like $50. 254 00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:38,280 - I definitely could've. - But you etched some coins. 255 00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:42,360 That's how the rich stay rich, baby! 256 00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:44,840 I think we all know how this goes. What are the scores? 257 00:11:44,840 --> 00:11:47,040 One point for Paul, two points for Kura, 258 00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:48,920 three points for Chris, four for Josh, 259 00:11:48,920 --> 00:11:50,760 and five points for Justine Smith. - Yes! 260 00:11:51,880 --> 00:11:55,360 Right. Time for Paul to start counting his newfound fortune, 261 00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:58,800 and we're going to play some ads that will tempt him to part with it. 262 00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:01,120 We'll be back soon. 263 00:12:09,680 --> 00:12:12,760 Hello again. You have rejoined Taskmaster. 264 00:12:12,760 --> 00:12:18,040 Right now, these comedians hoping to win a hotdog on a stick, some chicken pieces on a stick 265 00:12:18,040 --> 00:12:21,640 and an Olympic bronze medallist on a stick. 266 00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:24,440 One of those things is not edible. 267 00:12:24,520 --> 00:12:27,120 Paul, I'm ready for another task. What do you have for me? 268 00:12:27,120 --> 00:12:32,560 It's a team task, and it's worth noting that no special effects were used in the delivery ofthis task. 269 00:12:32,560 --> 00:12:34,560 Oh no. 270 00:12:41,200 --> 00:12:43,120 What on Earth is P. Willie doing? 271 00:12:43,120 --> 00:12:44,920 Is he doing a magic trick? - Wow. 272 00:12:44,920 --> 00:12:46,840 Wow. Paul's doing some magic. 273 00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:49,280 - Oh, right. - Let's stand here and make him do it for a bit longer, 274 00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:50,120 cos it's quite tragic. 275 00:12:50,120 --> 00:12:52,720 Oh my God. It must be that wire that can clearly see. 276 00:12:52,720 --> 00:12:54,920 - There's no wire. - What's that in your pants, then? 277 00:12:54,920 --> 00:12:56,200 It's my― my private parts. 278 00:12:56,200 --> 00:12:58,280 - We can see the string, mate. - What string? 279 00:12:58,280 --> 00:12:59,720 We can see it. 280 00:12:59,720 --> 00:13:01,480 I'll float it on to your hand. 281 00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:03,200 - Can I take it? I'll― - Just grab it. 282 00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:05,200 - OK. - Just grab it. 283 00:13:05,200 --> 00:13:07,080 How do you explain that? 284 00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:08,560 There's a rock in it. 285 00:13:08,560 --> 00:13:10,280 I don't wanna hurt your finger. 286 00:13:10,280 --> 00:13:11,760 OK. - Why would you hurt my finger? 287 00:13:11,760 --> 00:13:14,640 - Cos it's tied with a nylon string. - It wasn't. 288 00:13:14,640 --> 00:13:17,000 - Open away. - 'Enchant the forest. 289 00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:19,120 'Most enchanted forest wins. 290 00:13:19,120 --> 00:13:20,400 'You have 60 minutes. 291 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,680 'Your time starts... meow.' 292 00:13:22,680 --> 00:13:25,000 - An hour to enchant the forest? - To make it enchanted. 293 00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:26,440 We won't do a whole forest in an hour. 294 00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:28,000 We can certainly do a... - ...a bit of it. 295 00:13:28,000 --> 00:13:29,680 Plus, if a part of it is enchanted, 296 00:13:29,680 --> 00:13:32,840 then surely the rest of the forest will eventually become enchanted. - Yeah, it grows. 297 00:13:32,840 --> 00:13:33,880 It spreads. - Cos that's how... 298 00:13:33,880 --> 00:13:35,960 - ...enchantment spreads. - That's how enchantment works. 299 00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:39,000 Yeah. It's like ― what do you call it? ― um, kauri dieback. Yeah. 300 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:40,520 But like a magic version. 301 00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:42,400 Shall we get some enchanting things? - Yeah, let's go. 302 00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:43,520 Let's go shed it. 303 00:13:45,880 --> 00:13:47,280 Oh... 304 00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:48,960 - Yeah, we need like― - We need like an entry point. 305 00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:51,560 Like― This is quite good. - Yes. 306 00:13:51,640 --> 00:13:53,640 Like that. 307 00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:56,720 Just says, like, 'Let's fuck.' 308 00:13:58,440 --> 00:13:59,760 Hold it there. 309 00:13:59,760 --> 00:14:01,080 We got nine minutes left, guys. 310 00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:02,720 I've got a hat. 311 00:14:02,720 --> 00:14:04,320 There you go. 312 00:14:06,840 --> 00:14:08,160 Ready? 313 00:14:10,160 --> 00:14:13,080 Oh... Oh, I love enchanted forests. 314 00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:16,400 I've always been enchanted by enchanted forests. This is super exciting. 315 00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:18,960 I like what you said about, like, a fun kauri dieback. 316 00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:20,840 - Yeah, yeah. - Just― it spreads, 317 00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:22,480 that enchantment, man. You gotta watch it. 318 00:14:22,480 --> 00:14:27,240 OK, Paul. Whose mystical masterwork do I get to be spellbound by first? 319 00:14:27,240 --> 00:14:30,520 It's kind of unfair, because they have a Forrester in their team ― 320 00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:32,920 it's Justine, Josh and Kura. 321 00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:41,120 Welcome to the Enchanted Forest. 322 00:14:41,120 --> 00:14:46,480 We are an enchanted forest but also double as a lovely function centre 323 00:14:46,480 --> 00:14:50,680 with reasonable rates on weddings and other things. 324 00:14:50,680 --> 00:14:55,160 Come. See the forest. 325 00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:57,520 Come. 326 00:14:58,880 --> 00:15:00,880 We have the Bush Lady. 327 00:15:05,760 --> 00:15:07,760 Ooh! 328 00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:12,280 Spiders. 329 00:15:12,840 --> 00:15:16,320 Eyes are watching you. 330 00:15:16,320 --> 00:15:18,320 And the Man. 331 00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:36,240 Haaaa! 332 00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:39,640 I'm gonna wear you like a small pair of shorts. 333 00:15:39,640 --> 00:15:43,160 You're in the Enchanted Forest now. 334 00:15:43,160 --> 00:15:45,880 I'm gonna put you on one foot at a time, 335 00:15:45,880 --> 00:15:48,920 like a nice pair of socks. Christmas socks! 336 00:15:48,920 --> 00:15:50,840 Socks that I've been looking forward to! 337 00:15:50,840 --> 00:15:54,280 Socks that I like to wear on days that aren't Christmas! 338 00:16:07,240 --> 00:16:10,640 I mean, maybe that was less enchanted forest and more like day three 339 00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:14,120 at WOMAD on magic mushrooms. 340 00:16:15,120 --> 00:16:17,080 Yeah. - Just on the comedown, eh. 341 00:16:17,080 --> 00:16:18,560 - Yeah. - Like... 342 00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:20,680 Like, 'Don't pull out the recorder again.' 343 00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:22,480 Yeah. 344 00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:25,160 - That was Josh playing the recorder. - Yeah. 345 00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:27,720 Correct. - Has anyone ever heard anyone play the recorder 346 00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:30,120 and it actually sounded OK? - Yeah. 347 00:16:30,120 --> 00:16:31,600 Chris and I are actually both woodwinders. 348 00:16:31,600 --> 00:16:33,080 We both play the clarinet. - Clarinet, yeah. 349 00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:35,760 - Another fun fact about us. Um― - Oh, how cool 350 00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:40,000 - It is, actually. It's really cool! - It's really cool. 351 00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:42,080 People think the saxophone's cooler, but it's not. - It's not! 352 00:16:42,080 --> 00:16:43,600 It's not― That's not a sexy instrument! 353 00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:45,360 The straight black one is. 354 00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:49,920 - So, uh, Kura, you were taking us through the Enchanted Forest there... - Yep. 355 00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:53,560 - ...and the first person that we came across was the Bush Lady. - Yes. 356 00:16:53,560 --> 00:16:56,480 Jeremy, you've been saying to me that I've got a really fortune-teller vibe, 357 00:16:56,480 --> 00:17:01,560 and, you know, I like to listen to you, and I leaned into that crazy, witchy, wrapped-in-a-blanket, 358 00:17:01,560 --> 00:17:04,040 shit-in-my-hair vibe. 359 00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:06,840 All right. Paul? Will you enchant me again? 360 00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:09,640 It's time for a pretty full-on forest... 361 00:17:09,640 --> 00:17:11,440 - Fuck. - ...from our two tall timbers ― 362 00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:13,040 it's Chris and Paul. 363 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:15,360 Oooh! 364 00:17:15,360 --> 00:17:17,400 Stop, well-dressed virgin. 365 00:17:17,400 --> 00:17:20,160 You may not enter the Enchanted Forest. 366 00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:22,160 Bring in the virgin! 367 00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:25,800 Ooh. The Sex Witch bids you enter. 368 00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,880 - Thank you. - You are welcome. 369 00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:31,840 Halt, Virgin, 370 00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:35,520 and wash your private parts in my Sex Potion. 371 00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:37,520 Oh my God. 372 00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:38,720 Ahh. 373 00:17:38,720 --> 00:17:41,760 I can feel them beginning to heat up 374 00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:43,760 and grow. 375 00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:46,000 Continue, little virgin. 376 00:17:49,520 --> 00:17:52,400 Cow Slayer, put down your pan pipes 377 00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:54,600 and slay the beast! 378 00:17:55,120 --> 00:17:58,120 Gladly, my Bitch Queen. 379 00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:02,760 Come, little virgin, 380 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:04,760 and kneel before me. 381 00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:07,080 Ooooh! Good kneeling. 382 00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:09,600 Choose your fruit ― 383 00:18:09,600 --> 00:18:11,600 a banana or mango. 384 00:18:12,280 --> 00:18:15,280 He has chosen the mango, Cow Slayer. 385 00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:21,320 And now I shall give you 386 00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:24,920 some of my Sex Potion juice. - Ooh! 387 00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:28,560 Drink it and you will be forever horny! 388 00:18:29,280 --> 00:18:31,560 - Ah! - Good shot, Sex Witch. 389 00:18:31,560 --> 00:18:34,240 Yes. Yes! 390 00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:36,960 He is soak-ed. 391 00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:41,960 Release my horny virgin! 392 00:18:42,120 --> 00:18:43,480 Dance! 393 00:18:43,480 --> 00:18:45,320 Dance and fuck! 394 00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:51,160 Ooh. Ooh. 395 00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:54,960 Ooh! Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo! 396 00:18:55,080 --> 00:18:56,560 Look at the virgin. 397 00:18:56,560 --> 00:18:58,560 Ooh, sexy virgin. 398 00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:06,520 Boy, you've got some explaining to do there. 399 00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:07,880 Well, we saw him and we were like, 400 00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:12,280 'If anyone needs to be sexually enchanted, it's Paul.' 401 00:19:12,280 --> 00:19:14,080 Honestly. The rest of that day, 402 00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:16,280 he was giving us back rubs casually... 403 00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,760 - Whoo! - ...high fives; he was like.. 404 00:19:18,760 --> 00:19:21,200 like that. Yeah, he was a changed man, you know? 405 00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:23,960 - Look how comfortable Paul is - Mm. Oh, totally. 406 00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:26,640 But we didn't have to ask him to do anything twice. 407 00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:31,120 A lot of that shit was his idea. 408 00:19:34,600 --> 00:19:38,280 - Uh, your character was the... was the Sex Witch. - Yeah. 409 00:19:38,280 --> 00:19:39,480 Bitch Queen Sex Witch, yeah. 410 00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:42,560 It's an Elton John song. 411 00:19:43,920 --> 00:19:47,200 - I think five points for Paul and Chris... - Oh, thank you. 412 00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:50,760 ...and three points for Josh, Kura and Justine. 413 00:19:50,760 --> 00:19:53,360 They were very good. They were very good. - Great work. Great work. 414 00:19:53,360 --> 00:19:57,080 So, Paul, after all of that, what are the scores? 415 00:19:57,080 --> 00:20:01,200 In first equal, with 12 points each, it's Josh and Justine. 416 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:03,600 Whoooo! 417 00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:07,160 After all that wild forest action, 418 00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:10,880 it's time for a spiritual cleansing in the form of sage-burning 419 00:20:10,880 --> 00:20:12,960 and a commercial break. We'll see you soon. 420 00:20:23,600 --> 00:20:25,400 Welcome back to Taskmaster. 421 00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:27,880 We have frolicked in a sex forest 422 00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:31,240 and showered a well-dressed virgin in money. 423 00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:33,920 So, uh, pretty typical episode so far. 424 00:20:33,920 --> 00:20:37,560 Paul, you are on a roll with these tasks. Let's get into another one. 425 00:20:37,560 --> 00:20:40,720 Don't leave the room. You're not gonna wanna miss this one. 426 00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:50,400 Hello, Chris. - Hello, Paul. 427 00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:51,920 Hey, P. Willie. 428 00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:55,040 Was it actually windy out there, 429 00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:56,560 or was that acting? - Yeah, don't go out there. 430 00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:58,920 - OK. - I've just got back from Jumanji. 431 00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:00,400 You're lucky I could fit this in. 432 00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:02,400 - Delightful. - What is? 433 00:21:03,160 --> 00:21:05,160 - You are. - Thank you. 434 00:21:05,800 --> 00:21:08,280 - Does that look freaky? - Kinda. 435 00:21:08,280 --> 00:21:10,280 Ha-cha! 436 00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:12,320 'Leave the room... 437 00:21:12,320 --> 00:21:15,400 'and come back in exactly 11 minutes. 438 00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:19,000 'Your time starts when you leave the room.' 439 00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:20,440 Bloody hell. 440 00:21:20,440 --> 00:21:22,040 Does it matter what room I go into? 441 00:21:22,040 --> 00:21:24,160 Ideally, back out into Jumanji. 442 00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:26,640 Could you please leave the watch? - What? 443 00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:28,120 How am I gonna know 11 minutes? 444 00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:29,800 - Well, that's what― - I've just gotta guess? 445 00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:31,520 Yes, please. 446 00:21:31,520 --> 00:21:34,600 Please pass me your watch, please. - What if I use my phone? 447 00:21:34,600 --> 00:21:37,680 - Pass me your phone, please. - I shouldn't tell you these things. 448 00:21:37,680 --> 00:21:39,680 Is your phone in there? 449 00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:45,200 Come on, man! That's not Jumanji love, man. 450 00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:47,280 Oh my God. - Yeah. 451 00:21:47,280 --> 00:21:49,800 - It's Jumanji. - You see Jack Black? 452 00:21:49,800 --> 00:21:53,520 - No, I was in the Robin Williams... - I've got Jack Black. 453 00:21:53,520 --> 00:21:54,600 Yeah, sorry. 454 00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:57,000 It'd be... 11 sixties. 455 00:21:57,840 --> 00:21:59,240 Also known as 11 minutes. 456 00:21:59,240 --> 00:22:00,280 Yeah. 457 00:22:00,280 --> 00:22:02,160 Seven, eight. 458 00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:04,600 No― Shit. - Practising counting seconds? 459 00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:05,400 Yes. 460 00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:08,120 Let me think of a 10 minute stand-up comedy set, 461 00:22:08,120 --> 00:22:10,840 and then I'll wait for the one minute of applause that I usually get. 462 00:22:10,840 --> 00:22:12,840 OK. 463 00:22:13,160 --> 00:22:15,440 One, two, three... 464 00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:28,120 11 minutes. 465 00:22:28,120 --> 00:22:29,640 Hello, Paul. 466 00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:32,960 - You're a fast grower of facial hair. - Thank you. 467 00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:35,840 - What time did I get? - All the information you need is in the task. 468 00:22:35,840 --> 00:22:37,840 - This? - Yes, please. 469 00:22:39,600 --> 00:22:42,240 'Spot the 12 changes to this room. 470 00:22:42,240 --> 00:22:45,080 'Most correct wins. You have three minutes. 471 00:22:45,080 --> 00:22:47,080 'Your time starts now.' 472 00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:54,760 - So, there we are ― the old switcheroo. - Amazing. 473 00:22:54,760 --> 00:22:57,000 Paul, who gets to play 'spot the difference' first? 474 00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:59,600 It's Chris, Josh and Justine. 475 00:22:59,920 --> 00:23:01,760 Oh, piss― 476 00:23:01,760 --> 00:23:03,760 Gah! Fuck! Whoa! 477 00:23:04,360 --> 00:23:06,160 Hey, bro. - Long time no see, bro. 478 00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:07,440 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 479 00:23:07,440 --> 00:23:08,800 Shit, shit. 480 00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:10,440 Hi, David. 481 00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:11,160 Hi, Chris. 482 00:23:11,160 --> 00:23:13,680 - This wasn't here before. - What? 483 00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:16,400 This, um, piece of wallpaper that's sticking out. 484 00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:18,480 Well, there's a task in here now. A new task. 485 00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:21,440 I've looked around this room so many times. 486 00:23:21,440 --> 00:23:23,080 AmIdifferent? 487 00:23:23,080 --> 00:23:24,360 Might be mentally. 488 00:23:24,360 --> 00:23:25,680 Ew, yuck! 489 00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:27,160 Ew, is that real? 490 00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:30,360 There's a fuckin' rat in the cage! The hell's wrong with you? 491 00:23:30,360 --> 00:23:32,360 Banana ― new. 492 00:23:32,720 --> 00:23:33,960 This wasn't here before. 493 00:23:33,960 --> 00:23:37,080 So, I mean, I can just say things, and if they're wrong, it doesn't matter. 494 00:23:37,080 --> 00:23:38,160 This, this... 495 00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:40,720 - Could you put names on things, please? - Oh, OK. 496 00:23:40,720 --> 00:23:41,520 Um... 497 00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:43,520 That's different. 498 00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:46,200 - How is it different? - You― Well, duh. 499 00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:49,360 Some things go without having to be explained. 500 00:23:49,360 --> 00:23:50,720 He hasn't got any glasses! 501 00:23:50,720 --> 00:23:52,440 - 20 seconds. - Um... 502 00:23:52,440 --> 00:23:53,760 These were around a different order. 503 00:23:53,760 --> 00:23:56,000 All these globes have been moved. 504 00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:57,080 This is a different woman. 505 00:23:57,080 --> 00:23:58,160 It used to be your mum. 506 00:23:58,160 --> 00:23:59,640 Buzzy Bee wasn't there. 507 00:23:59,640 --> 00:24:00,880 I think that's― 508 00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:03,560 - Fuckin' hell. Honestly. - Sorry. 509 00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:05,920 - Did you win the season that you were in? - Nah. 510 00:24:05,920 --> 00:24:07,000 That's why I'm here... - Yeah. 511 00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:09,600 ...doing this. 512 00:24:09,600 --> 00:24:11,600 - Bye, David. - Bye, Chris. 513 00:24:11,680 --> 00:24:14,520 - Do I get to hang out with David? - If you want. 514 00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:18,200 - Thank you, Paul. - Hi, David. Come on, then. 515 00:24:18,440 --> 00:24:21,720 Thank you, Justine. Bye. Thank you, Paul! Love you. 516 00:24:21,720 --> 00:24:23,600 - Aww, that was cute. - So, just by the looks of it there, 517 00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:26,440 you went through and basically named every single thing in the room, 518 00:24:26,440 --> 00:24:29,480 including Paul's mum. - Feels like a good strategy to me. 519 00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:33,800 Who got a fright from seeing David Correos from Taskmaster Season Two? 520 00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:37,680 Yeah, I got a― I got a fright cos, um, well, it was different before. 521 00:24:37,680 --> 00:24:39,480 There was a wall. Did you guys not get a fright? 522 00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:40,960 No, I just felt really happy to see him. 523 00:24:40,960 --> 00:24:44,840 Cos I saw him straight away, cos he was sticking out about that far from the wall. 524 00:24:44,840 --> 00:24:48,240 - How did those guys go, Paul? - Chris spotted nine differences... 525 00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:49,920 - That's not bad. - ...of the 12; 526 00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:53,000 Josh spotted six, Justine only four. 527 00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:54,920 OK. Hmmm. 528 00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:56,680 What were the 12 changes exactly? 529 00:24:56,680 --> 00:24:58,000 - I have a graphic... - OK. 530 00:24:58,000 --> 00:24:59,840 ...of the 12 differences highlighted. 531 00:24:59,840 --> 00:25:01,720 - Wow. - Oh, that's good. 532 00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:04,160 I mean, a very obvious David Correos 533 00:25:04,160 --> 00:25:05,320 standing there against the wall ― 534 00:25:05,320 --> 00:25:08,200 surely they'd be able to spot him. - Surely. 535 00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:10,200 Here's Kura and Paul. 536 00:25:10,240 --> 00:25:12,400 OK, 12 changes to this room. 537 00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:14,400 Paul has a moustache. 538 00:25:14,400 --> 00:25:16,920 That light's turned blue. 539 00:25:16,920 --> 00:25:18,920 There's a banana. 540 00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:21,240 Um... 541 00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:26,120 I really wasn't paying attention to this before. 542 00:25:26,120 --> 00:25:28,160 That top picture is upside down. 543 00:25:28,160 --> 00:25:30,560 Was that upside down before? 544 00:25:34,680 --> 00:25:36,560 The rug's missing? 545 00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:38,760 That's two. That light's on. 546 00:25:38,760 --> 00:25:42,960 - How has he not seen David? - Oh my God. 547 00:25:45,440 --> 00:25:47,240 Um... 548 00:25:47,240 --> 00:25:50,920 those pencils have changed colour, I think. 549 00:25:51,080 --> 00:25:53,080 This... 550 00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:57,520 Oh, fuck! Fuckin'... 551 00:25:57,840 --> 00:25:59,400 Who's in there?! 552 00:25:59,400 --> 00:26:04,120 I'm not sure if there was a David Correos partially nude behind the lamp before. 553 00:26:04,120 --> 00:26:06,280 - Hey, Kura. - Hey, mate. How are you? 554 00:26:06,280 --> 00:26:08,320 - I'm good. How are you? - You look fabulous. 555 00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:09,720 Thank you. You look great too. 556 00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:10,800 Looks like an arsehole 557 00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:11,760 with one eye. 558 00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:14,640 No offence. Um, OK, so... 559 00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:18,800 Why I didn't see you first I don't know. That's really weird. 560 00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:20,440 Should've gone, 'Well, that's the obvious one.' 561 00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:23,760 Oh, I love ya. And I love that you're the wallpaper. 562 00:26:23,760 --> 00:26:25,520 Is that the same, that picture? 563 00:26:25,520 --> 00:26:26,800 Has the painting changed? 564 00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:28,400 Did he have glasses before? 565 00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:30,520 God, now I'm starting to lose my mind. 566 00:26:30,520 --> 00:26:33,800 David, can you tell me what's changed in here? 567 00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:35,560 Nah, I don't think I'm allowed to. 568 00:26:35,560 --> 00:26:36,640 Camera crew? 569 00:26:36,640 --> 00:26:38,320 They were there, right? - They were there, yeah. 570 00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:39,680 Oh, and this little trinket down here― 571 00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:41,800 Nailed it. 572 00:26:41,800 --> 00:26:43,200 How'd you get this guy? 573 00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:44,520 He's very available. 574 00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:45,680 How've things gone? 575 00:26:45,680 --> 00:26:46,560 Downhill? 576 00:26:46,560 --> 00:26:48,360 Since Taskmaster? 577 00:26:48,360 --> 00:26:49,480 Can look forward to that. 578 00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:51,040 - Cheers, mate. - Thank you. 579 00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:52,640 - See you, David. - Bye, Paul. 580 00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:54,000 - Great wallpaper. - Hey, thank you. 581 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:55,360 - You look hot. - Thank you. 582 00:26:55,360 --> 00:26:56,520 Are they paying you well? 583 00:26:56,520 --> 00:26:58,840 If I'm not getting paid, then he's not getting paid. 584 00:26:58,840 --> 00:27:01,920 Are you getting paid? - Pretty sure everyone here's getting paid. 585 00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:03,920 Are you getting paid? 586 00:27:06,440 --> 00:27:08,520 What the shit? 587 00:27:11,080 --> 00:27:13,840 How long did it take you to sp―? I mean, that was remarkable. 588 00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:15,960 - You were so close to him. - I know. 589 00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:18,880 - And he was sticking out. - Yeah. 590 00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:20,800 I've got really bad eyesight. 591 00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:23,000 I've got 20/20. - Yeah. 592 00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:24,960 - Oh dear. - I could smell him, but I... 593 00:27:24,960 --> 00:27:26,400 ...I couldn't tell 594 00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:28,320 where it was coming from. - Was that the rat in the birdcage? 595 00:27:28,320 --> 00:27:33,520 So, Kura, with her 20/20 vision, took 55 seconds to notice him, 596 00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:36,800 and, uh, Paul ― one minute 25. - Wow. 597 00:27:36,800 --> 00:27:38,440 Cannot believe that. 598 00:27:38,440 --> 00:27:40,800 - So, obviously took them a while to see David Correos... - Yes. 599 00:27:40,800 --> 00:27:44,360 - ...but how did they go overall? - Paul did spot seven differences 600 00:27:44,360 --> 00:27:46,360 and Kura 10. 601 00:27:46,360 --> 00:27:48,160 - Wow! - Nice! - Well done, Kura. 602 00:27:48,160 --> 00:27:49,720 Mate. 603 00:27:49,720 --> 00:27:53,080 So that means one point for Justine, two points for Josh, 604 00:27:53,080 --> 00:27:54,600 three for Paul, four for Chris 605 00:27:54,600 --> 00:27:58,280 and five points for Kura Forrester. - Great work, Paul. 606 00:27:58,280 --> 00:28:03,680 We're gonna take a break now to allow me to make a few phone calls to see how David Correos is doing. 607 00:28:03,680 --> 00:28:05,840 We'll see you soon. 608 00:28:14,680 --> 00:28:18,720 Welcome back to the visual and aural experience that is Taskmaster, 609 00:28:18,720 --> 00:28:20,560 where we're waiting to see who's going to take home 610 00:28:20,560 --> 00:28:22,760 a kebab and a hot dog. 611 00:28:22,760 --> 00:28:25,480 Paul Williams, I'm ravenous ― feed me another task, please. 612 00:28:25,480 --> 00:28:29,520 Get your popcorn ready. This one's a real blockbuster. 613 00:28:35,120 --> 00:28:36,880 Oh, heck. 614 00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:38,160 Yeah! 615 00:28:38,160 --> 00:28:40,720 You seem to have left some of your working gear out here. 616 00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:43,480 Did you know this person who was cremated? 617 00:28:43,480 --> 00:28:46,320 'Create a 30-second scene from a blockbuster.' 618 00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:47,960 Oh, it's a metaphor. 619 00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:49,880 'You must play the main character... 620 00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:53,160 '...and that character must― must be the President. 621 00:28:53,160 --> 00:28:56,520 'The President must wear the provided costume. 622 00:28:56,520 --> 00:28:59,520 'Your scene must start in the study 623 00:28:59,560 --> 00:29:01,920 'with a crash zoom out of your mouth. 624 00:29:01,920 --> 00:29:05,200 'Your scene must end with you drinking a cup of tea at the bar!' 625 00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:08,320 'Your scene must start with you drinking a cup of tea at the bar. 626 00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:11,720 'Your scene must end with you doing a forward roll in the field.' 627 00:29:11,720 --> 00:29:15,160 'Your scene must start with you doing a forward roll. 628 00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:18,880 'Your scene must end with you answering a phone call as you enter a car.' 629 00:29:18,880 --> 00:29:20,640 '...ending a phone call in a car. 630 00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:23,080 'Your scene must end with you biting an apple in the caravan.' 631 00:29:23,080 --> 00:29:25,160 '...biting an apple in the caravan. 632 00:29:25,160 --> 00:29:28,200 'Your scene must end with a crash zoom into your mouth.' 633 00:29:28,200 --> 00:29:30,240 - Oh my God! - PAUL,'Most blockbusting scene wins. 634 00:29:30,240 --> 00:29:32,440 - This is gonna be amazing. - 'You have 45 minutes.' 635 00:29:32,440 --> 00:29:34,960 'Your time starts... now!' 636 00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:37,800 - We're not gonna get to break anything? - Sorry. 637 00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:39,880 - Whose clothes are these? - President's. 638 00:29:39,880 --> 00:29:42,320 Yeah, but is the President... 639 00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:43,520 a girthy man? 640 00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:47,120 - Is this Donald-Trump-inspired? - Mm-mm. 641 00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:50,120 Feel quite presidential. 642 00:29:50,120 --> 00:29:51,360 I feel presidential. 643 00:29:51,360 --> 00:29:53,640 Shame we had to dress as a man to be the President, but... 644 00:29:53,640 --> 00:29:56,960 I don't think it should be the President of America. 645 00:29:56,960 --> 00:29:58,480 People of America... 646 00:29:58,480 --> 00:30:00,640 I think the President of the world. 647 00:30:00,640 --> 00:30:04,240 In which case he could be, like, from anywhere. You know? 648 00:30:04,240 --> 00:30:06,800 - Wh― Where is he from? - He could be from anywhere. 649 00:30:06,800 --> 00:30:10,080 - That sounds European, though. - Yeah, well, is he 650 00:30:10,080 --> 00:30:11,400 or is he not? 651 00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:14,080 Anywhere where I can do an accent 652 00:30:14,400 --> 00:30:16,600 without it being offensive. 653 00:30:16,600 --> 00:30:19,360 Those are the rules. 654 00:30:19,360 --> 00:30:20,600 - This is so cool! - This is great. 655 00:30:20,600 --> 00:30:22,800 So it's all starting to make sense now, right? Yes! 656 00:30:22,800 --> 00:30:24,920 - This is so cool. - So, everyone's playing the same character... 657 00:30:24,920 --> 00:30:27,080 - Yeah. - ...and you've all got slightly different scenes, 658 00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:29,080 and then we'll make a blockbusting trailer. 659 00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:31,040 - Yass. - Wow! - I'm interested, Chris ― 660 00:30:31,040 --> 00:30:34,720 which accents are you prepared to do and which ones aren't you prepared to do? 661 00:30:34,720 --> 00:30:36,160 All... 662 00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:38,840 All the white ones. 663 00:30:39,200 --> 00:30:41,880 I've booked my ticket. The trailers have played. 664 00:30:41,880 --> 00:30:43,680 Let's see this blockbuster. 665 00:30:43,680 --> 00:30:46,560 Starring in the role of the President, in order of appearance ― 666 00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:49,040 Chris Parker, Paul Ego, Kura Forrester, 667 00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:51,000 Justine Smith and Josh Thompson. 668 00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:53,480 Wow! 669 00:30:55,760 --> 00:30:57,640 It's a hell of a job 670 00:30:57,640 --> 00:31:00,720 being the President of the entire world. 671 00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:02,720 President of ze world, 672 00:31:02,720 --> 00:31:04,200 it has happened ― 673 00:31:04,200 --> 00:31:06,120 ze climate has changed. 674 00:31:09,360 --> 00:31:12,120 Prepare the luxury rocket ship. 675 00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:15,200 I'm taking my ass to another planet. 676 00:31:16,440 --> 00:31:19,280 Where are you going? 677 00:31:26,280 --> 00:31:29,960 Let's hope I do a better job at this next planet. 678 00:31:36,400 --> 00:31:40,640 Hello. The President of the United States speaking on his phone. 679 00:31:40,640 --> 00:31:41,800 What? 680 00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:43,800 Oh my God! 681 00:31:44,120 --> 00:31:46,120 Allof the gymnasts? 682 00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:48,240 How many did we send? 683 00:31:48,240 --> 00:31:50,520 4600? And they're all dead? 684 00:31:50,920 --> 00:31:54,840 Well, goddammit. That means I'm the only trained gymnast left 685 00:31:54,840 --> 00:31:56,920 in the White House. 686 00:31:56,920 --> 00:32:00,800 I haven't done gymnastics since 1978 in 'Nam. 687 00:32:01,680 --> 00:32:03,680 Goddammit. 688 00:32:04,240 --> 00:32:06,920 I am actually calling someone. 689 00:32:06,920 --> 00:32:09,320 You never forget how to do this sort of stuff ― 690 00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:10,680 backflip, 691 00:32:10,680 --> 00:32:11,920 commando crawl... 692 00:32:11,920 --> 00:32:14,600 Oh, this takes me back to Saigon. 693 00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:51,880 Here I am ― the fuckin' President, all the way from America ― 694 00:32:51,880 --> 00:32:54,760 and this is how they treat me here. Not very nice welcome. 695 00:32:54,760 --> 00:32:56,920 They say New Zealanders are super friendly, 696 00:32:56,920 --> 00:33:00,120 but they vote me in and they treat me like this?! 697 00:33:00,120 --> 00:33:01,960 Yeah, sure, I've done some bad stuff, 698 00:33:01,960 --> 00:33:06,040 but Samuel L. Jackson's on the line, standing over the detonator. 699 00:33:06,040 --> 00:33:08,680 If I say hello, he presses the button. 700 00:33:08,680 --> 00:33:11,360 If I say hi, I've changed my mind. 701 00:33:11,920 --> 00:33:13,920 Good luck, New Zealand. 702 00:33:16,400 --> 00:33:18,400 Yep. 703 00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:20,680 Yup. Yeah, it's come to me at this top level. 704 00:33:20,680 --> 00:33:22,680 I'm not even gonna let the VP do it. Mate, this is a job 705 00:33:22,680 --> 00:33:24,280 for the President. 706 00:33:24,280 --> 00:33:26,680 It's important. Project Evil Queen, mate ― 707 00:33:26,680 --> 00:33:31,360 my men cannot be trusted. Snow White is too precious to all of us. 708 00:33:31,360 --> 00:33:35,160 I found out the caravan where the Evil Queen spends her summer. 709 00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:40,720 Yes! The Evil Queen's caravan. 710 00:33:40,760 --> 00:33:43,560 Nailed it. Absolutely nailed it. 711 00:33:44,440 --> 00:33:45,880 Mm. 712 00:33:47,360 --> 00:33:49,280 Hello? 713 00:33:49,280 --> 00:33:51,280 My God. 714 00:33:52,440 --> 00:33:54,440 I'll drive! - Sir. 715 00:33:57,360 --> 00:33:58,600 Sir, what are you doing? 716 00:33:58,600 --> 00:34:00,320 I took a bite of a poisoned apple! 717 00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:02,360 If I don't get to a bath, I'll die! 718 00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:04,760 We're outta gas, goddammit! 719 00:34:06,120 --> 00:34:09,560 Where's the nearest bath?! - It's that way, Mr President. 720 00:34:09,560 --> 00:34:10,880 Goddammit! 721 00:34:10,880 --> 00:34:12,880 Come on! 722 00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:15,280 Yeah. Come on. 723 00:34:15,400 --> 00:34:17,400 Goddammit. 724 00:34:19,240 --> 00:34:20,600 Whoo! 725 00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:25,400 OK! 726 00:34:27,360 --> 00:34:29,640 Ah! Goddammit! Goddammit! 727 00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:31,160 Come on! 728 00:34:32,720 --> 00:34:34,040 Yes! 729 00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:35,480 The bath! 730 00:34:35,480 --> 00:34:37,480 The bath. 731 00:34:38,160 --> 00:34:39,840 No. 732 00:34:39,840 --> 00:34:41,440 Someone took out the plug! 733 00:34:41,440 --> 00:34:43,440 There's no antidote! 734 00:35:03,720 --> 00:35:06,720 That actually made more sense than a lot of action movies... 735 00:35:06,720 --> 00:35:08,400 - Yeah. - ...to be fair. Wow. 736 00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:10,520 That accent of yours, Chris ― 737 00:35:10,520 --> 00:35:13,000 wow. That was something. 738 00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:15,040 Never quite knew where it was gonna land. 739 00:35:15,040 --> 00:35:18,440 I like to keep people on edge, you know? 740 00:35:18,440 --> 00:35:21,720 Josh, you had some problems with your pants staying on at one point. 741 00:35:21,720 --> 00:35:25,520 Also the wig― - I don't believe I noticed anything there. Um... 742 00:35:25,520 --> 00:35:30,200 But it was a real... anal feast, really. It was quite... 743 00:35:30,200 --> 00:35:33,600 Sounds like my kind of movie. 744 00:35:34,160 --> 00:35:38,280 It was just really butt-heavy. I― I'm so sorry. 745 00:35:38,280 --> 00:35:43,320 Justine, great acting from you. Where did you get your inspiration for your accent? 746 00:35:43,320 --> 00:35:45,080 - Did I have an accent? - CHRIS,No. 747 00:35:45,080 --> 00:35:47,080 - No. - Oh. 748 00:35:47,240 --> 00:35:50,640 So, I call that accent... Christchurch. 749 00:35:51,240 --> 00:35:55,880 Kura, were you happy with Paul's role as Samuel L. Jackson? 750 00:35:55,880 --> 00:35:59,320 Uh, yeah. I don't actually remember calling him that. 751 00:35:59,320 --> 00:36:02,040 I should've given you a bit more lines, maybe. 752 00:36:02,040 --> 00:36:05,280 - I think it's― it's better I don't do his voice. Yeah. - No, I think it's― Yeah. 753 00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:06,760 I think that was fine. 754 00:36:06,760 --> 00:36:10,880 Paul, at one stage, you were running away and attacking yourself at the same time. 755 00:36:10,880 --> 00:36:13,640 It was meant to be kind of like a platoon thing ― me sort of running through 756 00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:15,000 and explosions and... - Mm. Mm. - Yeah. 757 00:36:15,000 --> 00:36:18,240 Well, somebody else threw the egg, and it did hit me in the penis. 758 00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:23,760 So that was― that was not acting. That really hurt. 759 00:36:23,760 --> 00:36:25,640 - It didn't break, though. - It didn't break. 760 00:36:25,640 --> 00:36:26,640 - Soft landing. - Gave the egg― 761 00:36:26,640 --> 00:36:29,520 Gave the egg a hell of a shock, I tell you what. 762 00:36:29,520 --> 00:36:32,840 Very hard to judge, to be honest, cos I think everybody was amazing. 763 00:36:32,840 --> 00:36:35,960 So if I'm going on accents, Justine, you're gonna get one point. 764 00:36:35,960 --> 00:36:36,960 What?! Aww! 765 00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:40,480 Kura, I'm gonna give you two because I thought Paul was very, very disappointing. 766 00:36:40,480 --> 00:36:43,120 Three for you, Paul. 767 00:36:43,200 --> 00:36:45,520 You took an egg to the nuts, which is impressive, 768 00:36:45,520 --> 00:36:48,280 so that is why you get three. - Oh, like we don't do that once a month. 769 00:36:50,280 --> 00:36:52,480 She's right. 770 00:36:53,440 --> 00:36:55,600 Josh, I would've given you more points, other than― 771 00:36:55,600 --> 00:36:57,760 that tongue action at the end was a little bit freaky... - Mm. 772 00:36:57,760 --> 00:36:58,640 ...so you get four, 773 00:36:58,640 --> 00:37:02,400 and Chris gets five for that remarkable international accent. 774 00:37:02,400 --> 00:37:05,920 Thank you. 775 00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:09,960 Here's some ads, which are like little teaser trailers for food and products. 776 00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:12,040 We'll see you in a moment. 777 00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:21,800 Welcome back. 778 00:37:21,800 --> 00:37:24,040 New Zealand pole vaulting champion Eliza McCartney 779 00:37:24,040 --> 00:37:26,200 is officially up for grabs as a prize tonight, 780 00:37:26,200 --> 00:37:30,360 so let's see if these comedians can jump one more hurdle. 781 00:37:30,360 --> 00:37:33,520 But first, Paul, update everyone on the scores, please. 782 00:37:33,520 --> 00:37:37,800 In first place, with 20 points, it's Chris Parker. 783 00:37:39,480 --> 00:37:41,480 - Whoo! - Who is going to win 784 00:37:41,480 --> 00:37:44,400 the nation's only medalling pole vaultist? 785 00:37:44,400 --> 00:37:46,760 There's only one way to find out ― a live task. 786 00:37:46,760 --> 00:37:51,520 Please take to the stage, everybody. 787 00:37:51,520 --> 00:37:54,280 Well, well, well. This one reeks of corporal punishment, 788 00:37:54,280 --> 00:37:57,040 which I, for one, get quite excited about. 789 00:37:57,040 --> 00:38:00,320 Paul, who's gonna lead the task? - Chris, please open your desk. 790 00:38:00,320 --> 00:38:02,320 - Ooh! - Oooh. 791 00:38:02,320 --> 00:38:03,960 No, kidding. 792 00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:04,960 Sir! Sir! 793 00:38:04,960 --> 00:38:07,400 He did the fingers to me, sir! - No, I didn't. No, I didn't! Don't be a snitch! 794 00:38:07,400 --> 00:38:09,680 Oh, fuck you. 795 00:38:10,040 --> 00:38:12,040 'Win the great debate. 796 00:38:12,080 --> 00:38:18,720 'Each round, you will be given a moot that your team must argue either for or against. 797 00:38:18,720 --> 00:38:22,360 'Your argument must consist of exactly six lines. 798 00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:24,640 'Your team must alternate lines. 799 00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:27,240 'Every second line must rhyme. 800 00:38:27,520 --> 00:38:29,880 'Best rhyming argument wins. 801 00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:33,040 'Your time starts on Paul's whistle.' 802 00:38:33,040 --> 00:38:35,920 So, the first round ― 'Bees are good.' 803 00:38:35,920 --> 00:38:41,000 Paul and Chris will be taking the affirmative; Kura, Justine and Josh will be taking the negative. 804 00:38:41,000 --> 00:38:44,080 Up first, the affirmative. 805 00:38:44,080 --> 00:38:45,560 Bees are good. 806 00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:47,480 They like to fly. 807 00:38:47,480 --> 00:38:48,840 Bees are great. 808 00:38:48,840 --> 00:38:50,480 They stung this guy. 809 00:38:50,480 --> 00:38:53,760 Bees are swell. They're really fuzzy. 810 00:38:53,960 --> 00:38:58,640 Bees make this thing called honey. I think that's kinda buzzy. 811 00:38:58,640 --> 00:39:00,480 Bees are awesome! 812 00:39:00,480 --> 00:39:02,440 They make a cool sound. 813 00:39:02,440 --> 00:39:04,000 Bees... 814 00:39:05,640 --> 00:39:08,320 ...exist in all sorts of places; 815 00:39:08,440 --> 00:39:12,440 around the world they can be found. 816 00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:14,480 And now the rebuttal. 817 00:39:14,480 --> 00:39:16,480 Bees are awful. 818 00:39:16,960 --> 00:39:19,040 They can sting your face. 819 00:39:19,160 --> 00:39:22,160 Bees are terrible because they do not know their place. 820 00:39:22,160 --> 00:39:24,040 Bees are bad. 821 00:39:24,040 --> 00:39:26,040 Oh, I hate them so. 822 00:39:26,160 --> 00:39:27,840 Bees are gross. 823 00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:29,840 Their hive doth grow! 824 00:39:30,160 --> 00:39:33,120 Bees are bad. One once stung my foot. 825 00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:35,600 Bees are so bad... 826 00:39:35,680 --> 00:39:38,880 I feel like crushing them into soot. 827 00:39:41,760 --> 00:39:44,320 Very valid points from both teams. I think everyone will agree 828 00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:46,960 the negative won that round. 829 00:39:46,960 --> 00:39:48,120 Whooo! 830 00:39:48,120 --> 00:39:51,880 Our second round ― 'Spoons are the best utensil.' 831 00:39:51,880 --> 00:39:53,360 Spoons... 832 00:39:53,360 --> 00:39:55,360 are the best utensil. 833 00:39:55,640 --> 00:39:58,040 They can be used for so much. 834 00:39:58,320 --> 00:40:00,320 Spoons... 835 00:40:00,440 --> 00:40:03,120 are used for food or scraping... 836 00:40:03,720 --> 00:40:05,800 the sweat from my 'crutch'. 837 00:40:07,680 --> 00:40:09,960 Spoons are the best utensil, 838 00:40:09,960 --> 00:40:12,280 ideal for slurping tea. 839 00:40:12,520 --> 00:40:14,920 Spoons are the best utensil 840 00:40:15,080 --> 00:40:16,480 because... 841 00:40:16,480 --> 00:40:19,960 I like to be little spoon, me. 842 00:40:20,000 --> 00:40:22,160 Spoons are the best utensil. 843 00:40:22,160 --> 00:40:25,160 My flatmate burns them on the stove. 844 00:40:25,640 --> 00:40:28,120 Spoons are the best utensil. 845 00:40:28,320 --> 00:40:30,200 I like to keep them... 846 00:40:30,200 --> 00:40:32,200 in my grove. 847 00:40:32,200 --> 00:40:34,680 - Is it 'grove'? I dunno. - Yeah, 'grove' is a thing. 848 00:40:34,680 --> 00:40:37,480 - And the negative. - I love forks. 849 00:40:37,920 --> 00:40:39,720 Give me knives. 850 00:40:39,720 --> 00:40:42,240 But spoons ― get in the bin. 851 00:40:42,480 --> 00:40:45,440 Get in the bin, spoons! 852 00:40:45,640 --> 00:40:47,640 I'd rather use 853 00:40:47,680 --> 00:40:50,240 a spatula 'agin'. 854 00:40:55,240 --> 00:40:59,200 Spoons are pretty crap. You can do much more with a knife. 855 00:40:59,200 --> 00:41:01,200 Exactly! 856 00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:05,880 Spoons... 857 00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:07,880 don't give me any life. 858 00:41:08,360 --> 00:41:11,600 Have you ever used one of those weird pasta things 859 00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:14,400 with the springy bits on the side? 860 00:41:14,520 --> 00:41:18,400 If you haven't used one of those, I'm afraid I think you've lied. 861 00:41:18,400 --> 00:41:21,800 Sorry, Jussie. 862 00:41:22,120 --> 00:41:24,240 I'm going with the affirmative on that one. 863 00:41:24,240 --> 00:41:27,560 It's 1-1. It all comes down to the final round. 864 00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:29,720 'Dancing should be illegal.' 865 00:41:29,720 --> 00:41:33,120 Dancing should be illegal. It can look like you're having a fit. 866 00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:34,760 Dancing should be illegal. 867 00:41:34,760 --> 00:41:38,760 When dads do it, it looks like shit. 868 00:41:38,880 --> 00:41:43,520 Dancing should be illegal. Just go for a run and listen to some tunes. 869 00:41:43,520 --> 00:41:45,160 Dancing should be illegal ― 870 00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:46,960 again, when dads do it, 871 00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:49,840 they look like buffoons. 872 00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:54,480 Dancing should be illegal because I hate seeing people have fun. 873 00:41:54,480 --> 00:42:00,440 Dancing should be illegal because it just looks like you're going on a terrible run. 874 00:42:00,440 --> 00:42:02,240 Well done, mate. Tough one. 875 00:42:02,240 --> 00:42:03,840 And now the negative. 876 00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:07,520 Dancing should be celebrated. It's a chance to kick up your feet. 877 00:42:07,520 --> 00:42:09,480 Dancing... 878 00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:13,160 should be everywhere, all over the world... 879 00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:17,440 ...and you should shout it out... 880 00:42:17,440 --> 00:42:18,840 through the street. 881 00:42:18,840 --> 00:42:21,520 Dancing should be everywhere! 882 00:42:21,720 --> 00:42:23,360 I want to move 883 00:42:23,360 --> 00:42:25,360 like the ocean. 884 00:42:28,000 --> 00:42:32,880 If I dance too hard and chafe my thighs, I need some lotion. 885 00:42:33,040 --> 00:42:34,840 I love to dance. 886 00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:37,280 It makes me feel so free. 887 00:42:37,480 --> 00:42:39,640 Sometimes I dance so hard 888 00:42:39,640 --> 00:42:43,520 out comes a little pee! 889 00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:47,200 Jeremy, it all comes down to this. 890 00:42:47,200 --> 00:42:50,000 The negative have taken it out with that. Very well done. 891 00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:52,320 Yeah, well done. Well done. 892 00:42:52,320 --> 00:42:55,480 Brilliant debating, everyone. Come on back down to the stage. 893 00:43:00,000 --> 00:43:01,560 So, Paul, 894 00:43:01,560 --> 00:43:03,280 who took that one out, then? 895 00:43:03,280 --> 00:43:06,640 Well, the team of three ― Josh, Justine and Kura. 896 00:43:06,640 --> 00:43:08,160 But how do you want to score it? 897 00:43:08,160 --> 00:43:11,560 - Uh, Josh, Justine and Kura should get three points. - OK. 898 00:43:11,560 --> 00:43:15,040 - And I think Paul and Chris should get two points. - Sounds good. 899 00:43:15,040 --> 00:43:17,040 - Seems fair. - OK. 900 00:43:17,240 --> 00:43:21,440 OK, Paul. So who's leading the season with three eps to go? 901 00:43:21,440 --> 00:43:25,240 It is very close. This is, I think, overall, the closest season we've had. 902 00:43:25,240 --> 00:43:28,120 Paul and Kura both on 106, 903 00:43:28,280 --> 00:43:30,280 Justine on 107, 904 00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:32,280 Chris on 108, 905 00:43:32,280 --> 00:43:34,760 and then Josh out on 117. 906 00:43:34,760 --> 00:43:37,200 Well, well, well. 907 00:43:37,200 --> 00:43:41,000 But importantly, tonight, there can only be one winner, 908 00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:43,200 who is having a hotdog for dinner 909 00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:44,720 with Eliza McCartney. 910 00:43:44,720 --> 00:43:47,520 He's gone back to back ― with 22 points, 911 00:43:47,520 --> 00:43:51,120 it's Chris Parker! 912 00:43:51,680 --> 00:43:54,280 Congratulations, Chris. Enjoy your sticks 913 00:43:54,280 --> 00:43:56,520 and please look after Eliza. 914 00:43:56,520 --> 00:43:59,000 There's another Olympics coming up soon, so... 915 00:43:59,000 --> 00:44:01,440 Go and enjoy the spoils. - Yay! 916 00:44:01,440 --> 00:44:04,200 - Be respectful. - Well, that ends this episode. 917 00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:06,840 Well, we saw the tragic return of David Correos, 918 00:44:06,840 --> 00:44:09,920 and Paul Williams was finally paid for his efforts on the show 919 00:44:09,920 --> 00:44:12,840 by everyone except Paul Ego. 920 00:44:14,320 --> 00:44:20,280 The biggest winner of tonight was, of course, our winner, Chris Parker! 921 00:44:20,280 --> 00:44:24,480 Thank you so much for joining us tonight. Po marie ― goodnight! 922 00:44:24,480 --> 00:44:26,480 Oh, it's Eliza! 923 00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:32,480 Captions were made with the support of NZ On Air. 924 00:44:32,480 --> 00:44:35,560 www.able.co.nz Copyright Able 2022 925 00:44:39,000 --> 00:44:42,280 We're watching our comedians make their very own best friend. 926 00:44:42,280 --> 00:44:44,720 Oh my God! 927 00:44:44,720 --> 00:44:46,600 Oh, you stupid idiot. 928 00:44:46,600 --> 00:44:48,680 I would not want to be any of your friends. 929 00:44:48,680 --> 00:44:51,720 We've all got our faults. I have problems with portion control; 930 00:44:51,720 --> 00:44:53,880 Tony's a big Third Reich guy. 931 00:44:53,880 --> 00:44:55,800 Tony, you're incorrigible!