Wow.
This place hasn't changed.
I've always wanted to come back here.
Cool, cool.
Now, tell me about the place you don't wanna go to.
What do you mean?
There's no place like that.
He means this place. Right here.
I take back my lunch offer, Joe.
-You can wait in the car. -Okay.
Or join us, please.
Come on, Uncle Máximo. You're obviously avoiding something.
Or someone.
Really? Who is it?
Our server is here. I can't tell you right now.
-No, she's not. -Don't call her over.
I'll just have to answer your question later.
So, are you ready to try ordering in Spanish?
Sure.
La cheeseburger. No bun.
Cheeseburger?
I fly you all the way down to my hometown in Mexico and you order "la cheeseburger."
I had Taco Bell yesterday.
That-- That's not--
We need another minute.
Okay, back to my story.
See, Hugo, it was a tough time for me.
DO NOT DISTURB!
At home, Sara blamed my mom for her breakup with Roberta.
But since she couldn't talk about it, she just stayed in her room.
Things were still awkward with me and Julia.
And work wasn't any better,
since Héctor was still taking half my tips.
Thank you.
But there was one thing I couldn't complain about.
Miss Isabel!
What have you stolen on this fine day?
Remote control?
Why would you steal that?
All that does is hurt the guests.
At least give me the batteries.
I'm hitting mute.
Why isn't it working?
Hey, I remember you mentioned you like lucha libre.
My parents have four tickets for tomorrow
and my brothers can't go…
Want to come?
Yes! I love lucha libre!
Fantastic!
My parents will be excited to finally meet you.
Finally?
"Finally"?
Wow.
I didn't realize how serious you and Isabel are.
I didn't either!
We haven't even gone out yet.
Why is she talking about me to her parents?
Because she likes you.
I think that's sweet.
Do you like her?
Sure…
She has three great qualities…
beauty…
personality…
and lucha libre tickets.
Can't I just go and have this not…
be a big deal?
Look…
Isabel comes from a big family. Just like mine.
And when our family brings someone in,
it can be a life sentence.
Three years ago, one of my sisters brought this guy
Antonio
…home to meet our parents.
He hasn't left our house since.
It's too early to meet her family.
Unless…
Okay!
What if I wear a luchador mask the whole time?
-Then- -No!
Stop!
Bad Máximo!
If you're not ready for something serious,
you have to cancel the date.
Yeah, you're right.
I'll go to her restaurant tonight to let her know.
Will the owner of the whitest ass in Mexico
please come to the front desk?
Who's messing with the PA?
Hey. Not funny.
See, Chad's old fraternity brothers heard he'd gotten engaged.
No way.
So they came down to surprise him.
Their names-- I can't remember their names,
but they were five blond, white guys who all went to USC.
So, they were all basically Chads?
Yeah, great idea. They're all Chads.
-Chad! -Chad, baby!
And Chad!
No way! Chad!
-Sup, Chad? -Sup, bro?
-Chad! -Chad!
I've known these guys since freshman year.
Your fiancé here was a legend in college.
I mean, we all called him "Rad Chad."
-Stop. -All right? Fraternity president,
beer pong champ, arm wrestling champ and inventor of a game we like to call
"Who can drink the most beers in a minute?"
Yes!
-It sounds like a complicated game. -It's pretty simple. We would just--
I was kidding.
But now, these guys are all crushing it. I mean, Chad is on Wall Street.
Chad is also on Wall Street.
And Chad spent a year trying to write a sprawling, Proustian memoir of his life,
but now he's on Wall Street.
Meanwhile, dude, your life is like a permanent vacation.
It is crazy, though, because we thought you'd be
-president by now or something. -Oh, I mean, you know,
my life is still pretty intense.
I'm basically, you know, running this entire resort.
Chad.
Your mom has a very, very, very, very important job for you.
She needs you to take her dress back to the dry cleaners.
They apparently-- They didn't get rid of the red wine stain.
She also said, and I quote,
"Don't let Manuel bully you again. You have to be stern with him."
-Fries are on the way. -Thank you.
Máximo! Hey. I need you to make me look good.
Okay, first you need to get some sun.
-Your skin is a bit too-- -No, I mean in front of my friends.
I'm sorry I can't help right now. But I know the perfect person who can.
Memo.
Chad needs your help to look good.
Oh, okay. First of all, you need more sun.
No, I'm not that-- My skin is sensitive and I-- Never mind, okay?
I just want you to talk me up in front of my friends.
I don't know. Groups of guys scare me.
Probably 'cause I grew up with five sisters
who also scare me.
Oh, come on. You'll be great.
Don't worry, this is your superpower.
Making the hero look good.
You're the guy behind the guy.
Now get in there and say some stuff about Chad you don't believe.
Wow, it's like you have an unlimited supply of stories of people throwing up.
-Yeah. -Hell yeah.
Okay. Well, I should get back to work.
It was really nice talking to all of you.
-Enjoy. -Take care.
Guys, this is my amigo, Memo. My "Memigo."
Memo.
Memo, this is Chad, Chad, Chad, Chad, and Chad.
Hi.
Wow, I hope I can remember all of your names.
Don Pablo, how were your first few days off in 20 years?
Wonderful.
My grandson, every time I make this face…
Oh, you don't care.
No.
You know the final walk-through for our investor Ricardo Vera?
Where his representative tells us the last changes they want
-before he puts millions into this place? -Yes. The walk-through's tomorrow.
Actually, his rep showed up today.
And since you weren't here, someone else escorted him around.
If it wasn't you and it wasn't me, who was it?
Paco the maintenance guy.
Hey, you need something, man?
Yes, I work for Mr. Vera, the hotel's new investor.
I'm here for the walkthrough.
Oh, cool.
I can show you around.
Chip?
On their tour, Paco agreed to an overhaul of the cabana menu,
he conceded in cutting my travel expenses,
negotiated a 20% raise in the maintenance budget,
and then at the pool…
Another thing…
Mr. Vera
does not care for this gimmick
of U.S. pop songs being sung in Spanish.
Classical music would be more appropriate.
Remember my name. Fame! I'm gonna live forever…
You're fired!
I'm gonna learn how to fly…
high…
Diane, this was a mistake, right?
Paco and the guy in the lame suit said we're fired.
We need this job.
I don't want to lose you either. We'll talk to him as soon as we can.
In the meantime, I'll find you another job here.
Oh, thank you, Don Pablo.
-We'd be happy to work anywhere. -Yeah.
Get to work.
No!
No harmonizing!
No fun!
Hey, Mom! Esteban!
What's the matter?
Nothing… your mom and your sister just had a disagreement.
Now she's hiding in her room and won't come out.
Your sister, not your mother.
Your mother's right here.
Esteban, do you mind taking care of that job I asked you about?
Mom, let him eat!
No, no, no… I'm full anyway.
Soup expands in the stomach.
You treat him like a worker instead of your boyfriend.
What do you even want that hook for anyway?
You know what they say…
Better to have a hook and not need it
than to need a hook and not have it.
Nobody says that!
Nobody.
What do you mean?
I just said it now.
Now it turns out that I am nobody.
Then he outran that giant boulder.
And even though Chad is scared of snakes,
he jumped into the snake pit anyway and saved the girl.
Dude, stop. You're embarrassing me. Come on.
All right. Be right back.
Boss man's gotta go fire some dudes on the kitchen staff.
"Boss man's gotta go fire some dudes on the kitchen staff."
What did you say?
Nothing, nothing. I was just kidding.
No, no. That sounded exactly like him.
Say it again.
"Boss man's gotta go fire some dudes on the kitchen staff."
-Oh, no way. -Well, actually,
if you want to do it right, you have to add the hair flip at the end.
"Hey, I'm Chad.
My mom looks super hot in spandex.
The double-popped collar is what makes the collars pop."
-Come on, bro! -That was awesome! Stellar!
Isabel, you are very cool and very pretty.
But I need to cancel our date tomorrow.
I'm not ready to meet your parents.
I'm not looking for something that serious.
Wait, that's this restaurant.
That's right.
The restaurant where Isabel worked.
I just had to find her and cancel our date
so I wouldn't have to meet her family the next night.
Oh no, Máximo!
That's not the greeting I was expecting.
It's a busy night and our dishwasher is out sick.
And before you ask…
Yes. I was banned from waitressing.
Why were you banned?
This idiot guest was--
Never mind, I know the answer.
Okay.
Isabel…
You are very cool--
Isabel!
Is that Máximo?
It must be.
He's got that boyish deer-in-the-headlights look
you described!
Who is that man that looks like you?
Oh, that's my dad!
This is my family's restaurant.
This is your family's restaurant?
Mercedes! Come.
Everyone! Come and meet Máximo!
Actually, I should really--
That's my mom Mercedes, my aunt Raquel,
my brothers Flaquito and Giraffe are waiters…
and those are my uncles…
cousins and…
my grandma Marina sits in the corner and hisses at people.
Wow.
She likes you.
Welcome to the family.
This girl here is spoiled.
So you'd better be serious about her.
Hold on, Máximo wanted to tell me something.
So, go ahead…
Save it.
She can't talk until she's done washing the dishes.
Let's go! Back to work! Hurry up.
We should just talk tomorrow on our date.
Let me help with those dishes!
It was the employees' Christmas dinner,
and I was on kind of two dates at once.
Both girls were very into me.
-Oh, you dog! -All right, man.
Memo!
-Hey, guys. -Oh, dude, Memo here is the best.
The best! Hey, tell us another hilarious story.
Okay, so this one time, Chad asked
-if Spain was the capital of Mexico. -Beer pong!
-Hey, it's time for some beer pong! -Yes!
-Yeah! Come on! -Let's go!
Beer pong! Beer pong! Beer pong! Beer pong!
So, has your family always had this place?
No, when I was growing up, we actually had a restaurant in San Diego.
But…
things got complicated.
And we missed Acapulco.
So we moved back here.
Oh wow, you lived in the U.S.?
That's so cool.
We're much happier here,
This is home.
I can't believe your family spends all day with each other and still gets along.
My family can't even eat soup together.
Okay, I know you love spending time with me,
but you've already washed that dish twice.
Want to tell me what's going on?
Oh, right…
Isabel…
you are very cool and very--
We have a problem.
Luisa slipped and hurt her ankle.
So we're down a server.
I could cover for her, Dad.
But you're so mean to the guests.
Only the stupid ones who don't deserve to eat.
You see? No.
Or I could do it.
It's what I do all day.
I'd be happy to help.
Who do I trust more…
…my daughter?
Or someone I just met today?
Here is your pozole.
Enjoy.
Flaquito, I'll take that.
Thanks.
Come on.
-Eat it, Chad! -Come on! Come on, bro!
So fast!
Chad, you got this. One cup.
Hey, you look down. Want a beer?
No, thanks. I'm just kind of bummed.
I was having a lot of fun being in the spotlight,
but now Chad took all the att--
Hey, you look down. Want a beer?
-Yes! Rad Chad does it again! -There he is.
Yeah!
"I call myself 'Rad Chad' to you guys,
but deep down, I call myself 'Sad Chad' because my glory days are behind me
and my only friends are on my mommy's payroll."
-Burn! -Memo, you're en fuego!
That means "on fire." We just learned that.
Hey, Memo. Would you mind teaching me a new word in Spanish?
Thanks for all your help, but do you mind maybe backing off a bit?
-Oh, I'm sorry. -No, it's fine. It's just…
I asked you to help me look good in front of my friends.
I know you're imitating me as a tribute,
but I'm worried they might think you're mocking me.
I know, but I'm always the guy behind the guy.
What?
The best friend helping out the hero.
I guess it was kind of fun to be the star for once.
Wait, so does that mean you're not gonna back off?
Dudes, we've been talking.
We're placing bets on who we think would win at arm wrestling. You or Memo.
Sure.
I can beat most of my sisters in arm wrestling.
Weird way to psych me out. I'm in.
It's perfect.
Thank you, Esteban.
Of course. Now you have a hook, even if you don't need a hook.
Oh, but I do need this hook.
You've been here enough times…
and kept your hat on enough times…
that it deserves…
its own spot.
May I?
That's your hook now.
Nora, this is…
My mom used to say…
"Be patient Esteban."
"Love will come with time. And a hook."
And now…
You've made me part of this home.
I will not let you down. Ever.
Maybe I can start leaving my hat here overnight.
Let's not get carried away.
Ah, yes.
If this is what they play in heaven, I'm glad I'm not going.
It's bad for business.
Instead of drinking, the guests are falling asleep.
I'm sorry, but Mr. Vera said no more U.S. pop songs in Spanish.
No Exception.
How about a compromise?
You convince Mr. Vera to accept a small change, and we--
we make sure your wife doesn't find out about your affair.
Oh…
Well…
I think I'll go talk to Mr. Vera.
Excuse me.
How did you know he was having an affair?
I didn't.
-There you go. -Nice. Stretches.
-That's the main thing. -It's important.
Yeah, but he's gotta get ready.
Come on!
-What's going on here? -Arm wrestling. It's important.
-Yeah. -Those four words have never been used
-in all of human history. Come here. -Hey!
What's really going on?
I guess I'm just trying to look like I'm doing great in life
because sometimes I don't feel like I am, and I wish I was more like these guys.
I don't.
When I first met you, you were exactly like them.
But now you're more experienced, more thoughtful,
and more engaged to be married than any of them.
And you know more Spanish.
-I said, "And you also"-- -No, I got it.
I did.
That's when Chad realized
maybe he'd gotten a lot further in life than he thought.
And so, Chad decided to let Memo win.
Unfortunately, Memo had the exact same idea.
And go!
Go, Chad.
Come on.
Why aren't you trying?
I'm letting you win. You need this more. I'm the guy behind the guy.
Not today. Today you're the guy in front of the guy behind the guy.
I'm gonna make you beat me.
Not if I can help it.
-So, what that means is-- -That's right, Hugo!
It was a reverse arm wrestle.
Oh, you're really strong.
I thought you said you lost to your sister.
Yeah, the one that's a nun.
She's got God on her side.
And biceps like bowling balls.
Oh, you're so strong!
-Oh, you're so strong! -I'm not! I'm really not!
-I'm so weak and you're stronger! -You're so strong!
Oh, Memo, you're hurting my elbow!
Chad. Chad.
Oh, I lost!
Memo!
-Shots. -Shots, baby!
-Shots! -You guys go celebrate.
I'll be right behind you.
Thank you.
Chad was feeling better about his life at Las Colinas,
but as I helped Isabel and her family,
I felt as if--
as if I'd stumbled into another life altogether.
Perfect. I'll take these two.
That's it.
Thank you.
Two flans.
Here you go.
Thank you.
Oh, you don't have to pay me.
We pool our tips and split them.
Don't you do that at Las Colinas?
No.
In fact, I have to give half my tips to my boss.
This is nothing like my job.
Or my family.
Thank you for making me feel so welcome today.
Quite the contrary.
Thank you for all your help.
You earned it, right?
Cheers!
Adriana! Augusto!
You're going back to the pool.
Yes!
I was getting so pale!
One favor for Mr. Vera…
Sometimes, why don't you play a Mexican pop song…
in English?
Let's go.
I'm glad it's resolved.
I just wish you had been here. Then this problem would've never happened.
He showed up a day early. And I was visiting my family.
I know. But let's not have this happen again.
-Hey, guys. -Hey.
I just wanted to say thanks for today, Chad. I really appreciate it.
Don't mention it. I had fun too.
You know, I realized I don't need to worry about what Chad thinks about me.
Or Chad. Or Chad, or Chad, or even Chad.
I only need to worry about what one person thinks about me.
And that's Chad.
I had fun tonight.
Although it's weird that you wanted to meet my family so fast.
So much of happiness
is about finding that place where you feel like you belong.
Esteban always knew that place was with Nora.
And tonight, he learned that Nora felt the same.
Chad realized he was happier now than he'd ever been.
For Don Pablo, that place had always been the hotel.
But suddenly, he wasn't so sure.
And I might have found the place I belonged when I wasn't even looking.
Hey --
Didn't you want to tell me something?
Oh right…
Yes. I did.
Isabel…
you are very cool and very pretty…
and…
I'm excited for our date tomorrow.
Me too.
Now in Spanish!
The applause is for you, fine audience.
Thank you, Las Colinas!