1 00:00:06,459 --> 00:00:12,376 A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES 2 00:00:12,459 --> 00:00:13,709 [theme music playing] 3 00:00:17,126 --> 00:00:20,459 PROHIBITION FROM HELL 4 00:00:20,543 --> 00:00:21,626 CHEAP LAWN MOWING! 5 00:00:21,709 --> 00:00:25,043 [Marcin] That's me. Marcin Łopian, nineteen years old. 6 00:00:25,543 --> 00:00:28,459 I'm from Pęchery in the municipality of Piaseczno. 7 00:00:29,001 --> 00:00:31,668 Born in Łbiski between Pęchery and Piaseczno. 8 00:00:31,751 --> 00:00:33,293 -[mosquito buzzing] -That's right. 9 00:00:33,376 --> 00:00:37,418 Dad's tractor wasn't fast enough to get us to the hospital in Piaseczno in time. 10 00:00:37,501 --> 00:00:39,584 That's why I have this scar on my cheek. 11 00:00:39,668 --> 00:00:41,668 Manure spreaders are no joke. 12 00:00:42,168 --> 00:00:44,959 You're probably wondering what an assistant to a construction foreman 13 00:00:45,043 --> 00:00:48,626 is doing in the middle of the street with a messed-up face at 3:00 a.m. 14 00:00:48,709 --> 00:00:51,043 Let me emphasize that I'm still at work. 15 00:00:51,751 --> 00:00:54,418 If you guessed that I just got hit in the face with a high kick, 16 00:00:54,501 --> 00:00:58,168 you win a coupon for bupkis with a side of diddly-squat. 17 00:00:58,709 --> 00:01:00,376 But joking aside, 18 00:01:00,459 --> 00:01:02,793 time to regain consciousness, and face the enemy. 19 00:01:02,876 --> 00:01:04,043 [ominous music plays] 20 00:01:04,126 --> 00:01:05,876 [laughs] 21 00:01:05,959 --> 00:01:08,376 [Marcin] That's right. Besides doing construction work, 22 00:01:08,459 --> 00:01:11,668 we're also in the business of fighting dark forces. 23 00:01:12,293 --> 00:01:14,626 My fists are made of shit, you fucking asshole! 24 00:01:14,709 --> 00:01:17,459 -'Scuse me? -And your ugly human face is the toilet, 25 00:01:17,543 --> 00:01:18,709 so surrender now! 26 00:01:18,793 --> 00:01:20,626 Or I'll take a shit on you! 27 00:01:20,709 --> 00:01:21,626 Hyah! 28 00:01:21,709 --> 00:01:24,793 [laughs] You don't know much about obscur-dicks! 29 00:01:24,876 --> 00:01:27,293 Those aren't my balls! You kicked me in the ass! 30 00:01:27,376 --> 00:01:28,293 [shouts] 31 00:01:28,376 --> 00:01:29,584 [choking] 32 00:01:29,668 --> 00:01:33,376 Don't move or I'll cut your fucking dick off! 33 00:01:33,459 --> 00:01:35,543 Uh-oh. How do you know where my dick is? 34 00:01:35,668 --> 00:01:36,751 [Marcin] That's Domino. 35 00:01:36,834 --> 00:01:39,834 Yeah, he's a demon, but he's on our side. 36 00:01:39,918 --> 00:01:43,418 He's screwed back in Hell, so he joined our crew a few months back. 37 00:01:43,959 --> 00:01:47,376 He might be terrible at martial arts, but he's also shit at fist-fighting. 38 00:01:47,459 --> 00:01:48,584 [grunts] 39 00:01:49,084 --> 00:01:51,043 [Domino] Boss! Marcin is in trouble! 40 00:01:51,126 --> 00:01:52,709 Quick, pass me the shotgun! 41 00:01:52,793 --> 00:01:55,418 I'd rather pass a kidney stone than pass you this shotgun. 42 00:01:55,501 --> 00:01:56,959 Hell, I'm not suicidal! 43 00:01:57,043 --> 00:01:59,126 Plus, I need it, there's one more right back here! 44 00:01:59,209 --> 00:02:00,543 [Marcin sighs] 45 00:02:00,626 --> 00:02:02,293 And this is our boss. 46 00:02:02,376 --> 00:02:03,543 Bogdan Boner. 47 00:02:04,209 --> 00:02:07,376 Yeah, he's about as good at shooting as Domino is at fighting. 48 00:02:08,209 --> 00:02:09,376 [bottles shattering] 49 00:02:09,459 --> 00:02:10,543 Oh, Jesus. 50 00:02:10,626 --> 00:02:12,126 Good God, not the vodka! 51 00:02:12,209 --> 00:02:13,793 -[shouts] -Oh fuck! 52 00:02:14,376 --> 00:02:15,376 Thanks a lot. 53 00:02:15,459 --> 00:02:16,293 [shouts] 54 00:02:16,376 --> 00:02:17,376 [grunts] 55 00:02:17,459 --> 00:02:18,376 [yelling] 56 00:02:18,459 --> 00:02:20,376 Get lost! Can't you see what's happening? 57 00:02:20,459 --> 00:02:24,084 How long can you go without air? Why won't you just fucking die already! 58 00:02:24,168 --> 00:02:26,043 Hey! You first, asshole! 59 00:02:26,876 --> 00:02:29,376 Phew. Thanks, man. That was a close one. 60 00:02:29,459 --> 00:02:31,543 Okay, now give the gun back to the boss. 61 00:02:31,626 --> 00:02:34,084 Or maybe don't. He'll be better off without it. 62 00:02:34,168 --> 00:02:35,043 Why'd I say that? 63 00:02:35,126 --> 00:02:37,959 VODKA WINE BEER 6 AM - 11 PM 64 00:02:38,043 --> 00:02:39,334 Mission accomplished. 65 00:02:39,418 --> 00:02:40,376 Let's head back. 66 00:02:40,876 --> 00:02:44,043 -[all laughing] -[Boner] You heard this one? 67 00:02:44,126 --> 00:02:47,834 Milik is such a shitty soccer player that when he gets horny and wants to fuck, 68 00:02:47,918 --> 00:02:49,626 he couldn't even score in a whorehouse! 69 00:02:49,709 --> 00:02:51,709 [all laughing] 70 00:02:51,793 --> 00:02:53,543 Who needs to pay for a comedy show 71 00:02:53,626 --> 00:02:55,793 when the boss tells such hilarious jokes! 72 00:02:55,876 --> 00:02:58,334 Speaking of payment, I wanted to ask you, boss, 73 00:02:58,418 --> 00:03:00,459 when exactly do I get my salary? 74 00:03:00,543 --> 00:03:02,793 Your salary, huh? How much do I owe you? 75 00:03:02,876 --> 00:03:05,918 -For the past month or in general? -Why don't we just say for the past month. 76 00:03:06,001 --> 00:03:08,251 It's 1,400 for last month but… 77 00:03:08,334 --> 00:03:10,709 Here, take 1,500 zloty and we can honestly call it even. 78 00:03:10,793 --> 00:03:13,293 Take it easy, Marcin, money isn't everything, you know. 79 00:03:13,376 --> 00:03:15,168 I think what really matters is good humor. 80 00:03:15,251 --> 00:03:16,334 So do you know this one? 81 00:03:16,418 --> 00:03:18,459 The Prime Minister goes to the whorehouse... [screams] 82 00:03:18,543 --> 00:03:20,709 Hey, Marcinek, what's your fucking problem? 83 00:03:20,793 --> 00:03:21,626 [gun fires] 84 00:03:21,709 --> 00:03:24,584 Oh Christ, Marcin, what have you done? What the hell has possessed you? 85 00:03:24,668 --> 00:03:27,084 [screams] You're possessed, right? That's it? 86 00:03:27,168 --> 00:03:30,126 Don't worry, Domino, I'll show you. Let's get back to the store. 87 00:03:31,793 --> 00:03:33,834 -[engine revving] -[tires screeching] 88 00:03:39,043 --> 00:03:40,668 Oh damn! What kind of magic is this? 89 00:03:40,751 --> 00:03:43,793 Just because someone looks like the boss and dresses like the boss, 90 00:03:43,876 --> 00:03:45,543 doesn't mean it's actually the boss. 91 00:03:45,626 --> 00:03:46,709 [licking] 92 00:03:46,793 --> 00:03:48,584 And what do you… [burps] …want? 93 00:03:48,668 --> 00:03:50,834 Oh no! Only enough for one! 94 00:03:51,501 --> 00:03:53,959 But how, Marcin? What about the boss tipped you off? 95 00:03:54,043 --> 00:03:56,668 The real boss would never have given me my entire salary, 96 00:03:56,751 --> 00:03:58,543 and definitely not without an argument. 97 00:03:58,626 --> 00:04:00,918 It turns out those obscur-dicks are shape-shifting demons 98 00:04:01,001 --> 00:04:02,376 and can even take on human form. 99 00:04:02,459 --> 00:04:04,293 That's one of their biggest and baddest tricks. 100 00:04:04,376 --> 00:04:07,001 It's too bad you didn't give us that information sooner! 101 00:04:08,209 --> 00:04:11,168 [demon] It's going to be so fucking awesome, Krzysztof! 102 00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:14,668 It's going to be the party of a lifetime. And look at our supplies! 103 00:04:14,751 --> 00:04:16,043 Twelve cold ones in this bag 104 00:04:16,126 --> 00:04:18,376 and a bottle of liquor in my backpack for dessert! 105 00:04:18,459 --> 00:04:20,043 Shh. Damn it, Bartosz. 106 00:04:20,126 --> 00:04:21,793 -Have you gone fucking nuts? -What? 107 00:04:21,876 --> 00:04:25,959 Don't you dare even think about saying the word "bottle" next to Piotras! 108 00:04:26,043 --> 00:04:28,209 First of all, why worry? He's not here yet. 109 00:04:28,293 --> 00:04:29,209 Oh, that's right. 110 00:04:29,293 --> 00:04:32,251 [echoing] Piotrek! Move it! 111 00:04:32,334 --> 00:04:34,793 And then second of all, what's the big fucking deal? 112 00:04:34,876 --> 00:04:37,459 The deal is he's never even tried alcohol in his life. 113 00:04:37,543 --> 00:04:39,084 He barely agreed to go for this beer. 114 00:04:39,168 --> 00:04:41,334 [whispering] I just really don't want him to get spooked. 115 00:04:41,418 --> 00:04:43,168 Then why did we chip in for the... 116 00:04:43,251 --> 00:04:44,793 Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm? 117 00:04:44,876 --> 00:04:46,876 -Oh, you'll find out. -[door opens] 118 00:04:46,959 --> 00:04:49,209 [whistling] Wassup, homies? 119 00:04:49,293 --> 00:04:50,376 Finally. 120 00:04:50,459 --> 00:04:53,001 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 121 00:04:53,084 --> 00:04:55,334 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 122 00:04:55,418 --> 00:04:57,709 ♪ Happy birthday, dear Piotras ♪ 123 00:04:57,793 --> 00:04:59,251 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 124 00:04:59,334 --> 00:05:02,626 -And many more on-- -All right, buddy, let's go get wasted! 125 00:05:02,709 --> 00:05:04,626 [neighbor 1] What's with all the yelling? 126 00:05:04,709 --> 00:05:06,584 Don't you realize some of us work night shifts 127 00:05:06,668 --> 00:05:09,668 at the cauldron boiling humans and need to sleep during the day? 128 00:05:09,751 --> 00:05:11,668 [neighbor 2] Hey, mister, why are you yelling? 129 00:05:11,751 --> 00:05:12,793 I'm working from home here! 130 00:05:12,876 --> 00:05:15,418 [neighbor 1] Living at the brothel doesn't mean you work from home! 131 00:05:15,501 --> 00:05:18,168 One fifty an hour after the neighbor discount! 132 00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:21,626 Do you know how many people I have to boil alive to make that kind of money? 133 00:05:21,709 --> 00:05:22,834 [sniffing] 134 00:05:22,918 --> 00:05:24,626 Hmm, that's what beer smells like. 135 00:05:24,709 --> 00:05:26,376 No, that's what shit smells like. 136 00:05:26,459 --> 00:05:29,251 Come on, P-Man, your eighteenth birthday only comes once a year. 137 00:05:29,334 --> 00:05:31,126 [gulping] 138 00:05:31,209 --> 00:05:33,918 -What's up? Come on, do it! -All right. Bottoms up. 139 00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:36,001 [gulping] 140 00:05:37,334 --> 00:05:38,584 So she says to me, 141 00:05:38,668 --> 00:05:41,418 "When you're ready to finish, let me know, 'cause I don't like…" 142 00:05:41,501 --> 00:05:44,501 so I say, "Don't worry, Mariola, I'm not close." 143 00:05:44,584 --> 00:05:46,459 [pretending to orgasm] 144 00:05:46,543 --> 00:05:47,959 And that's how I got this black eye. 145 00:05:48,043 --> 00:05:49,209 [drunken laughing] 146 00:05:49,293 --> 00:05:51,793 -Piotras, don't you have to piss? -What? 147 00:05:51,876 --> 00:05:53,876 Oh, right. Guys, I'm going for a piss. 148 00:05:54,376 --> 00:05:56,668 All right, Bartosz, this is it. Keep an eye out for him. 149 00:05:56,751 --> 00:05:59,376 -What are you planning? -Quiet, homie, no time to explain. 150 00:05:59,459 --> 00:06:01,293 [laughing] This'll be hilarious. 151 00:06:01,376 --> 00:06:03,501 Damn, that bush is all wet. 152 00:06:03,584 --> 00:06:06,459 Never mind the bush. Let's knock these back before they go flat. 153 00:06:06,543 --> 00:06:09,584 -Ready, set… -[all chugging] 154 00:06:11,626 --> 00:06:13,626 [foreboding music playing] 155 00:06:14,876 --> 00:06:18,376 [Beelzebutt] Fucking shit! Fucking shit! See what you did? 156 00:06:18,459 --> 00:06:20,293 With all due respect, Your Evilness, 157 00:06:20,376 --> 00:06:23,543 but it was you who went behind the tape and knocked over the ladder. 158 00:06:23,626 --> 00:06:25,543 Oh, it hurts so bad. 159 00:06:25,626 --> 00:06:28,793 Like somebody pouring non-alcoholic beer into my face. Aah! 160 00:06:28,876 --> 00:06:31,959 We're going to need a doctor. Do you have health insurance? 161 00:06:32,043 --> 00:06:32,876 No way. 162 00:06:32,959 --> 00:06:34,376 Well, lucky you, then. 163 00:06:34,459 --> 00:06:36,043 You're paying for your own treatment. 164 00:06:36,126 --> 00:06:37,543 [demon] Hey, boss! Hey, boss! 165 00:06:37,626 --> 00:06:39,834 [panting] 166 00:06:42,709 --> 00:06:44,626 [continues panting] 167 00:06:44,709 --> 00:06:46,918 Good morning, Your Motherfuckedness. 168 00:06:47,001 --> 00:06:48,793 Oh shit, Tomek, what happened to you? 169 00:06:48,876 --> 00:06:51,126 Not too much, I just broke my right leg. [yelps] 170 00:06:51,209 --> 00:06:52,543 Oh… I know that pain. 171 00:06:52,626 --> 00:06:54,543 Like somebody pouring non-alcoholic-- 172 00:06:54,626 --> 00:06:57,459 Tell me why you're here immediately or I'll have you neutered. 173 00:06:57,543 --> 00:06:59,501 Ah. So I have two pieces of news. 174 00:06:59,584 --> 00:07:01,709 The first one is that you have to turn on the news, 175 00:07:01,793 --> 00:07:04,459 and the second is that the car has been picked up from the shop. 176 00:07:04,543 --> 00:07:07,209 It's parked in its usual spot. There's no sign of the TV. 177 00:07:07,293 --> 00:07:10,501 An unusual event took place last night in the center of Cain Square 178 00:07:10,584 --> 00:07:11,793 where a group of drunken youths 179 00:07:11,876 --> 00:07:14,043 gathered together to celebrate an 18th birthday, 180 00:07:14,126 --> 00:07:17,293 managed to desecrate the statue of our endarkened leader Beelzebutt. 181 00:07:17,376 --> 00:07:18,793 We have a recording of the incident. 182 00:07:18,876 --> 00:07:21,918 Citizen, this is your second to last warning! 183 00:07:22,001 --> 00:07:23,626 Please get off of the statue! 184 00:07:23,709 --> 00:07:26,126 Or we will be forced to use gas on you! 185 00:07:26,209 --> 00:07:28,043 [whooping] 186 00:07:28,126 --> 00:07:30,543 I am the fucking King of Hell! 187 00:07:30,626 --> 00:07:34,126 I am the king of… King of… of Ass! 188 00:07:34,209 --> 00:07:37,043 King of Ass, this is your final warning! 189 00:07:37,126 --> 00:07:39,418 Please get off the statue! 190 00:07:39,501 --> 00:07:40,459 Whoo-hoo! 191 00:07:40,543 --> 00:07:42,543 And Batman's goggles! 192 00:07:42,626 --> 00:07:44,001 Commencing spraying! 193 00:07:44,668 --> 00:07:46,168 -[spraying] -[wind whooshing] 194 00:07:46,959 --> 00:07:48,751 -[all coughing] -Nah! Nah! 195 00:07:48,834 --> 00:07:51,543 Piotras the Invincible! [screams] 196 00:07:51,626 --> 00:07:52,459 [groans] 197 00:07:52,543 --> 00:07:54,376 [grunts] Damn bastards! 198 00:07:54,459 --> 00:07:56,834 Destroying such a beautiful statue! 199 00:07:56,918 --> 00:07:58,793 I'll show you assholes what's what. 200 00:08:02,668 --> 00:08:04,001 -[TV crashing] -[car alarm blaring] 201 00:08:04,084 --> 00:08:06,293 Call the General Assembly at once! 202 00:08:06,376 --> 00:08:07,918 I shall give a speech! 203 00:08:08,876 --> 00:08:11,376 [cheering] 204 00:08:12,251 --> 00:08:15,959 Following the recent shameful crimes committed by these youths, 205 00:08:16,043 --> 00:08:18,043 I am making the following announcement. 206 00:08:18,126 --> 00:08:21,709 The laws concerning the minimum age to buy and consume alcohol 207 00:08:21,793 --> 00:08:24,293 in Hell and all its territories are changing. 208 00:08:24,376 --> 00:08:28,501 From this day forward, the established legal minimum drinking age 209 00:08:28,584 --> 00:08:30,709 in Hell for its citizens will be raised 210 00:08:30,793 --> 00:08:33,126 from a mere eighteen years of age, 211 00:08:33,209 --> 00:08:35,543 to a much more twenty-one years of age. 212 00:08:37,209 --> 00:08:39,209 [citizen 1] Wait! What about cigarettes? 213 00:08:39,293 --> 00:08:42,001 [citizen 2] Yeah! What about cigarettes? 214 00:08:42,084 --> 00:08:46,834 The total ban on smoking tobacco products and the use of all types of e-cigarettes 215 00:08:46,918 --> 00:08:49,459 will continue to be upheld indefinitely! 216 00:09:01,668 --> 00:09:03,293 -[thuds] -[gasps] 217 00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:04,543 Did you hear that, Bożenka? 218 00:09:04,626 --> 00:09:06,293 -What the heck was that? -Don't know. 219 00:09:06,376 --> 00:09:08,168 I think it was a thud in the garage. 220 00:09:08,251 --> 00:09:10,793 I'd better go check it out right now. You never know. 221 00:09:13,418 --> 00:09:15,418 You just think you're so clever, don't you? 222 00:09:15,501 --> 00:09:17,668 Not this time, you old drunk. 223 00:09:20,709 --> 00:09:21,709 [door creaking] 224 00:09:22,834 --> 00:09:24,418 Hello? Someone there? 225 00:09:24,501 --> 00:09:26,418 Hello? [wheezy chuckle] 226 00:09:26,501 --> 00:09:29,126 Ehh, Bożenka, Bożenka. 227 00:09:29,793 --> 00:09:32,126 Bożenka, Bożenka. 228 00:09:32,209 --> 00:09:36,209 Bożenka may not be much to look at, but does she have the brains? 229 00:09:36,293 --> 00:09:37,834 Also no. [wheezy laugh] 230 00:09:37,918 --> 00:09:40,709 So when will you learn you just can't win against me? 231 00:09:40,793 --> 00:09:42,084 Not a fucking chance. 232 00:09:42,168 --> 00:09:44,501 I'm just too damn cunning for that. 233 00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:46,376 And now it's time to hit the bottle. 234 00:09:46,459 --> 00:09:48,043 So you say you want a hit? 235 00:09:48,126 --> 00:09:50,251 -There you go, you loser! -Ow! Come on, Bożenka! 236 00:09:50,334 --> 00:09:52,793 What was that slap for? I haven't even taken a sip yet! 237 00:09:52,876 --> 00:09:54,751 What for? Every night this week 238 00:09:54,834 --> 00:09:57,668 you've been sneaking out to the garage and coming back stinking of onions. 239 00:09:57,751 --> 00:09:59,418 And all this time you thought I didn't know? 240 00:09:59,501 --> 00:10:02,501 That you were gorging yourself on onions to mask the smell of vodka? 241 00:10:02,584 --> 00:10:04,459 But all that ends right now! 242 00:10:04,543 --> 00:10:05,584 [loud thud] 243 00:10:05,668 --> 00:10:06,834 [whimpering] 244 00:10:06,918 --> 00:10:08,626 Didn't I tell you there was a thud? 245 00:10:08,709 --> 00:10:10,376 [foreboding music playing] 246 00:10:10,459 --> 00:10:14,168 -Yee-haw! Come on, let's go! -Michał, Michał. Michał. Wait. 247 00:10:14,251 --> 00:10:15,084 Look. 248 00:10:15,584 --> 00:10:16,459 Uh-oh. 249 00:10:21,251 --> 00:10:22,334 [growls] 250 00:10:24,209 --> 00:10:26,293 [demon] All right, Cyprian, do you remember everything? 251 00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:28,793 [Cyprian] I do, but I still think it's a stupid idea. 252 00:10:28,876 --> 00:10:30,959 Goddamn it, don't you want to get drunk? 253 00:10:32,293 --> 00:10:33,459 Let's do it. 254 00:10:33,543 --> 00:10:36,751 CONSUMPTION OF ALCOHOL ON THE PREMISES PROHIBITED 255 00:10:36,834 --> 00:10:38,834 [upbeat music playing] 256 00:10:43,418 --> 00:10:46,751 Hello, I'd like half a liter of your cheapest vodka 257 00:10:46,834 --> 00:10:47,709 and a Coke. 258 00:10:48,668 --> 00:10:50,626 Here you go. That'll be 18 zloty. 259 00:10:53,709 --> 00:10:55,793 [gasps] Mr. Staś! 260 00:10:56,376 --> 00:10:57,418 Oh, damn it! 261 00:10:59,001 --> 00:11:00,376 [grunts] I've got him! 262 00:11:00,459 --> 00:11:03,168 I've got him! I've got ahold of him! You little… 263 00:11:03,251 --> 00:11:05,543 [indistinct angry shouting] 264 00:11:05,626 --> 00:11:07,334 I'll show you! [grunting] 265 00:11:07,418 --> 00:11:10,043 You little shit! Stealing? Stealing? 266 00:11:10,126 --> 00:11:12,376 This one's for you, you son of a gun! 267 00:11:14,418 --> 00:11:15,334 [door slams] 268 00:11:16,084 --> 00:11:19,209 And don't show your face around here again, you little shit! 269 00:11:23,168 --> 00:11:24,376 Janusz! 270 00:11:25,459 --> 00:11:27,126 You are a fucking genius! 271 00:11:28,126 --> 00:11:30,084 EXORCISM AGENCY / CONSTRUCTION AND RENOVATION COMPANY BONER 272 00:11:30,168 --> 00:11:32,084 [man] We can't cope. We just can't cope anymore. 273 00:11:32,168 --> 00:11:34,918 On any given day we have twice as many reports 274 00:11:35,001 --> 00:11:37,709 as we did during our Days of Cheap Alcohol. 275 00:11:37,793 --> 00:11:39,959 There's so much of this devilish crap going on! 276 00:11:40,043 --> 00:11:43,084 And half our officers are on leave. Paid leave! 277 00:11:43,168 --> 00:11:44,834 They are scared, the shitheads. 278 00:11:44,918 --> 00:11:46,959 Help us, Boner. You're our only hope. 279 00:11:47,043 --> 00:11:49,293 Assuming that your fee is reasonable, of course. 280 00:11:49,376 --> 00:11:51,376 All right, yeah, we're gonna take care of it. 281 00:11:51,459 --> 00:11:52,418 But first things first. 282 00:11:52,501 --> 00:11:55,543 We need to try to figure out why there's been such a sudden increase in activity 283 00:11:55,626 --> 00:11:57,543 from those God damned horned bastards. 284 00:11:57,626 --> 00:12:01,209 Apparently, the problem is that Beezlebutt raised the legal drinking age in Hell. 285 00:12:01,293 --> 00:12:03,626 And there's the answer to our first big mystery. 286 00:12:03,709 --> 00:12:05,918 Now the next major issue we need to figure out 287 00:12:06,001 --> 00:12:08,459 is how to keep those demon scum from bring their partying 288 00:12:08,543 --> 00:12:10,001 all the way up here to Earth. 289 00:12:10,584 --> 00:12:12,376 Got it! Say, hey, Domino, can you sing? 290 00:12:12,459 --> 00:12:14,376 Not at all. But I really like it! 291 00:12:14,459 --> 00:12:16,668 Exactly! Pretty much like all singers now. 292 00:12:16,751 --> 00:12:17,959 It's freakin' perfect! 293 00:12:18,043 --> 00:12:20,876 ANDREA BOOBCELLI - CONCERT FREE ENTRY! DRINK INCLUDED - VODKA WITH SPIRIT 294 00:12:20,959 --> 00:12:22,959 [thudding] 295 00:12:26,793 --> 00:12:28,668 Calm down. Slowly. Don't panic. 296 00:12:28,751 --> 00:12:32,459 There's enough liquor for everyone, okay? One vodka with moonshine over there. 297 00:12:32,543 --> 00:12:33,376 And for you? 298 00:12:33,459 --> 00:12:35,376 The same! [laughs] 299 00:12:35,459 --> 00:12:36,293 STAFF ONLY 300 00:12:36,376 --> 00:12:38,543 It makes my heart weep to see the amount of damn alcohol 301 00:12:38,626 --> 00:12:39,959 that is being fucking wasted here. 302 00:12:40,043 --> 00:12:41,126 Why are you worried? 303 00:12:41,209 --> 00:12:42,418 Are you paying for this? 304 00:12:42,501 --> 00:12:45,251 This has all been confiscated from an illegal distillery. 305 00:12:45,334 --> 00:12:48,959 Hey, so what? It tastes just as wonderful and delicious as legal alcohol. 306 00:12:49,043 --> 00:12:50,126 Should we attack now? 307 00:12:50,209 --> 00:12:52,293 Let's wait until everyone's inside the club. 308 00:12:52,376 --> 00:12:53,293 Hey, Domino. 309 00:12:53,376 --> 00:12:54,501 [Domino on radio] Yes, boss? 310 00:12:54,584 --> 00:12:57,043 -Get your ass on the stage. -[Domino] Roger that. 311 00:12:57,126 --> 00:12:59,126 ANDREA BOOBCELLI 312 00:13:01,126 --> 00:13:03,876 -[club music playing] -[demons cheering] 313 00:13:03,959 --> 00:13:06,959 [in Polish] ♪ A-ya-ya-ya-ya I am coming for the nuts ♪ 314 00:13:07,043 --> 00:13:09,959 ♪ Just the nuts, I've got all the rest ♪ 315 00:13:10,043 --> 00:13:12,876 ♪ Take it in your hand Then into your mouth ♪ 316 00:13:12,959 --> 00:13:16,043 ♪ May be salty 'Cause I mixed up my spices ♪ 317 00:13:16,126 --> 00:13:21,876 ♪ This nutcake is for you, baby My love nutcake, baby ♪ 318 00:13:21,959 --> 00:13:28,251 ♪ Open your mouth wide And imagine it's a willy ♪ 319 00:13:28,334 --> 00:13:30,334 [all cheering] 320 00:13:30,959 --> 00:13:33,043 [Marcin on radio] Boss, how much longer? 321 00:13:33,126 --> 00:13:35,834 We ran out of the free vodka. They're going to kill me! 322 00:13:36,459 --> 00:13:38,626 -Give us our vodka, you thieves! -[jeering] 323 00:13:38,709 --> 00:13:40,084 Please remain calm! 324 00:13:40,168 --> 00:13:44,418 We were supposed to have free drinks included with our tickets, for fuck sake! 325 00:13:44,501 --> 00:13:45,959 Boss, I'm begging you! 326 00:13:46,043 --> 00:13:49,126 Wait for it, wait for it, wait for... 327 00:13:49,751 --> 00:13:51,043 Lock 'em in! 328 00:13:51,126 --> 00:13:51,959 [door slams] 329 00:13:53,876 --> 00:13:55,876 [all cheering] 330 00:13:55,959 --> 00:13:56,876 [music stops] 331 00:13:56,959 --> 00:13:59,709 And now, ladies and gentlemen, the main attraction. 332 00:13:59,793 --> 00:14:01,084 Foam party time! 333 00:14:01,168 --> 00:14:02,626 -We've got a surprise! -[all cheering] 334 00:14:02,709 --> 00:14:05,793 -The foam is made out of holy water! Die! -[all gasp] 335 00:14:07,001 --> 00:14:07,959 [demons screaming] 336 00:14:08,043 --> 00:14:08,959 FOAMMASTER 1000 CAUTION 337 00:14:09,043 --> 00:14:10,043 [screaming in pain] 338 00:14:17,876 --> 00:14:18,709 You traitor! 339 00:14:18,793 --> 00:14:21,418 I'm taking you down with me! 340 00:14:22,126 --> 00:14:23,543 -Wait. What the hell? -Ha, ha! 341 00:14:23,626 --> 00:14:24,543 Surprised? 342 00:14:24,626 --> 00:14:26,334 I built up a tolerance! 343 00:14:26,418 --> 00:14:28,043 Get off the stage, shithead! 344 00:14:28,626 --> 00:14:30,626 [screaming] 345 00:14:32,543 --> 00:14:34,418 [laughs] You fucktards! 346 00:14:34,501 --> 00:14:36,793 -This is what you deserve! -[sputtering] 347 00:14:39,001 --> 00:14:40,376 [powering down] 348 00:14:40,459 --> 00:14:41,543 Uh-oh. 349 00:14:42,043 --> 00:14:43,376 [growling] 350 00:14:43,459 --> 00:14:44,543 Oh, holy shit! 351 00:14:44,626 --> 00:14:46,709 Hey, boss, help me! 352 00:14:46,793 --> 00:14:48,251 [demons growling] 353 00:14:48,334 --> 00:14:49,293 [gun firing] 354 00:14:50,043 --> 00:14:51,251 Shit, goddamn it! 355 00:14:51,334 --> 00:14:52,543 I'm all out of ammo! 356 00:14:53,126 --> 00:14:54,626 Oh crap, I'm gonna die in here! 357 00:14:54,709 --> 00:14:57,959 Shit, I wonder how Marcin and the boss are keeping it together out there. 358 00:14:58,043 --> 00:14:59,918 Oh crap, we're fucking finished! 359 00:15:00,001 --> 00:15:01,418 Boss, if you get us out of this one 360 00:15:01,501 --> 00:15:05,043 I promise you that I'll work every day for free for the next six months! 361 00:15:05,126 --> 00:15:06,959 Hmm. You say you'll work for free? 362 00:15:07,043 --> 00:15:08,376 What about the overdue wages? 363 00:15:08,459 --> 00:15:09,418 Eh… 364 00:15:09,501 --> 00:15:12,376 What overdue wages? Boss, you don't owe me anything, I swear! 365 00:15:12,459 --> 00:15:14,793 You should have said so sooner! 366 00:15:16,209 --> 00:15:17,043 [grunt] 367 00:15:17,626 --> 00:15:19,293 Turns out it won't be that easy. 368 00:15:19,376 --> 00:15:20,334 Goodbye, boss. 369 00:15:20,418 --> 00:15:22,543 We can settle up our deal on the other side. 370 00:15:22,626 --> 00:15:25,126 I certainly hope and pray there's an ATM in Heaven. 371 00:15:26,793 --> 00:15:31,876 [in Polish] ♪ Priest Natan He freaks out even Satan ♪ 372 00:15:31,959 --> 00:15:34,251 [in English] Okay, you demon trash from the depths of Hell, 373 00:15:34,334 --> 00:15:38,209 say hello to my little six-barreled friend who shoots sanctified bullets! 374 00:15:38,293 --> 00:15:40,293 -[gun firing] -[hopeful music playing] 375 00:15:42,543 --> 00:15:43,376 [yelps] 376 00:15:54,418 --> 00:15:57,293 Wait, Natan? What are you doing here, you dirty wiener? 377 00:15:57,376 --> 00:15:59,793 You should really be thanking my huge girthy wiener 378 00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:01,959 because I just saved your fu… 379 00:16:02,043 --> 00:16:03,459 [honking laugh] …ass. 380 00:16:03,543 --> 00:16:06,334 I know that your company likes that kind of entertainment, 381 00:16:06,418 --> 00:16:09,043 but you better keep your holy wiener away from my ass! 382 00:16:09,126 --> 00:16:12,209 Ehh, ungrateful. Next time… [screams] 383 00:16:12,293 --> 00:16:13,959 Get away, you dark entity! 384 00:16:14,043 --> 00:16:15,751 Get him off me! 385 00:16:23,001 --> 00:16:23,959 Phew! 386 00:16:24,043 --> 00:16:26,251 Fine, have it your way. We're even now. 387 00:16:26,334 --> 00:16:28,376 Well, it really pains me to say this to you, Boner, 388 00:16:28,459 --> 00:16:30,543 but thank you for saving my fu… 389 00:16:30,626 --> 00:16:31,876 [honking laugh] …ass. 390 00:16:31,959 --> 00:16:34,626 Yeah. Except I wasn't trying to hit the evil demon. 391 00:16:34,709 --> 00:16:36,126 Err… 392 00:16:36,209 --> 00:16:37,043 THE END 393 00:16:37,126 --> 00:16:39,293 [in Polish] ♪ Exorcist for less than three hundred ♪ 394 00:16:39,376 --> 00:16:42,376 ♪ Actually, it's two hundred If you want a bill, it'll cost you more ♪ 395 00:16:42,459 --> 00:16:45,168 ♪ Watch it, Beelzebutt You're gonna get your ass kicked ♪ 396 00:16:45,251 --> 00:16:48,459 ♪ Watch it, Buttcifer He's aiming at you ♪ 397 00:16:48,543 --> 00:16:52,834 [malevolent laugh]