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NETFLIX 原創影集

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踏馬德山…

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劇名：受詛咒的廣告

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已經近在眼前

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該死

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灰灰，你原來會說人話？

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說得不太好

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不過我非常擅長罵髒話，他馬…的！

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（廣告時間）

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我們在盧布林高地種植出

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全波蘭最高品質的啤酒花…

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不過為何要多花錢？

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試試傾倒啤酒，由中國產啤酒花釀造

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傾倒啤酒！價格無敵！

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（只要1.39元）

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飲酒僅限成人，啤酒並非酒精

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我要去冰箱拿啤酒，不想喝的舉手

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那就一人一罐

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我要去撒泡尿

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切斯瓦…

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切斯瓦肉丸含10％肉類成分

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其餘材料為本公司獨家神秘配方

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我願意為了這些肉丸大開殺戒

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大開殺戒！

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如果不想喝啤酒，可以嚐嚐我的…

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皮耶路查，你還好嗎？

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天啊，你的氣色好差，快喝點啤酒

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我比較想吃肉丸！

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皮耶路查，你在幹嘛？

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我本來只想要小號，結果得到大號

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還好我坐在馬桶上

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皮耶路查？

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別這樣，我超怕癢的！

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我要吃肉丸！

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（公立停屍間）

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以上就是整個事件的狀況

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這傢伙闖入我們轄區

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攻擊了鮑皮警官，還奪走他的配槍

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慶幸的是，他不知道該如何用槍

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其他幾名死於車禍，或是從高樓墜路

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警長，這不值得大驚小怪

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你也清楚每到週末
都會有人喝醉，然後幹盡蠢事

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更何況，這些被“附身”的傢伙都死了

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等於問題自動解決

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就算暫時解決，下週又會重新開始！

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沒人知道真實原因

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但每到週六就會有幾個人發瘋

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不僅傷害他人還會毀壞市容

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也許有人從東部邊境
偷渡了一批神秘藥酒？

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不，我喝過但沒發生任何事

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根據目擊者回報
有些清醒的人在電視上

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看完第四台播放的電影後突然發瘋

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大約是在廣告時間

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我知道你想說什麼了

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受詛咒的廣告

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我也聽過這個都市傳說

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讓我著手調查這條線索

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雖然我懷疑只是空穴來風

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就像廁所裡的女鬼一樣

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不過沒關係，顧客都是…笨蛋！

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不好意思，我會收拾乾淨

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（酷斃電視台）

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什麼審查？

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你可以看這張

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警長和一些需要簽名的人發的搜索令

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別擔心，這跟播放無版權電影無關

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無關嗎？那要幹嘛？

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我們被派來審查週六晚上播放的廣告

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廣告？誰會看那種東西？

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我根本不知道會播什麼

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雅努斯可以帶你去檢查檔案

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馬辛跟旁邊的蠢蛋

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你們跟雅努斯去看到底播過哪些廣告

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我還有問題要跟司徒瓦斯導播請教

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我很樂意回答，但不確定會有答案

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我們才剛接管這間電視台沒多久

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之前這裡的工作人員
因為一次意外全數喪命

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只有一位清潔工倖存

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那就帶我去找那位清潔工

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好，但我必須提醒你

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老柯茲卡有些不太正常

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所有廣告都在這個資料夾裡，不過

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我不知道週六都播什麼
電腦會自動選擇

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天啊，居然有340個檔案？
我們要在這裡過夜了！

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你不喜歡看廣告嗎？有些很精彩耶！

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沃德私密處保養錠，讓妹妹們香香地

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你受夠自己的啤酒肚了嗎？

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你想讓女人保持美麗
並主動投懷送抱嗎？

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改變你的習慣、變得更健壯

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享用純餾伏特加

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所以你們想知道，那天晚上

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這棟大樓裡發生的事情嗎？

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我已經問第三次，快要失去耐心了

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閉嘴！不然換我閉嘴！

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好啦，快點告訴我

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告訴你？不，我不想告訴你！

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我只想自言自語

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讓殘留在體內的伏特加支配我的舌頭

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從我的自言自語
也可說是源源不斷的廢話中

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你可以自行釐清事件真相

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但千萬要注意！

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儘管嚐起來都像屎

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不代表全都可以食用…

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那我開始了

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那天是星期四傍晚

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酷斃電視台的工作人員們

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正在進行私密處保養錠的廣告拍攝

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而我也在崗位上處理例行公事

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突然間，意料之外的事發生了

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下午六點的時鐘，突然跳轉成午夜

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天色瞬間變暗，一道閃電襲來

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擊中停在門外的轎車

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接著電視台大門被推開

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一隻怪物走了進來

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正當所有人被嚇傻在原地

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那隻怪物開口了

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不過我還在忙，所以沒仔細聽

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只要有人敢與我作對

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我會把他的頭摘下來
狠狠塞進惡魔的巢穴！

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你休想！我才是這裡的導播…

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-呃…
-你好

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就這樣，電視台內頓時亂成一團

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你好

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很可惜，我不知道接下來發生什麼事

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因為我全神貫注於手上的事物

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大家都說攝取過多酒精會致死

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但我就是最佳案例

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完美推翻了這個理論

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超噁心

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然後我就直接斷片了

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我不確定自己睡了多久

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但那段時間足以讓我尿濕的褲子乾透

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當我再次睜開雙眼
那隻野獸就不見了

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只剩下空氣中，淡淡的肉丸香味…

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你說聞到了肉丸的味道？

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那我知道了，這很簡單

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肯定是惡魔偷錄了廣告

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順便埋下詛咒

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正常人不會看廣告
所以看到的人就會倒霉…

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馬辛，別看肉丸廣告！

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你們在幹嘛？

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沒什麼，怎麼了？

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你們在玩牌！

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幹得好！

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真的嗎？因為實在太無聊了
哪個正常人會看廣告？

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我看完消化道按摩器的廣告就放棄了

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不過達米樂還在看

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糟糕，我忘了那個蠢蛋

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達米樂，別看…

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（剪輯室）

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太遲了

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天啊！達米樂，你遭遇了什麼？

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你們先猜自己接下來的遭遇吧！

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好吧，少一個員工也不算損失

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不！如果你對他開槍

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-我就不幹了！
-那很好

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我就能一口氣甩掉兩個蠢蛋

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我還會去檢舉你非法錄用我

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我絕對會後悔的

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達米樂，等等，我車上有肉丸！

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說好的肉丸在哪…

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喂！

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打電話給那坦

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讓他來表演那些神父的伎倆

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幫惡魔驅魔，這倒是頭一遭

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雖然超級沒必要，不過非常成功

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他馬上就會醒來了

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勃納，你欠我一個人情，再見！

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你母親才欠我人情，她…

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誰膽敢解除我的詛咒

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還刪掉我精心拍攝的肉丸廣告？

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我完全沒有備份欸！

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什麼？是你！

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雖然不足以彌補肉丸廣告的精彩

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但今天就是你的死期！

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斯拉維克？

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達米樂？

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天啊，太驚喜了！我該殺掉他們嗎？

179
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不，放他們一馬，他們是好人

180
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斯拉維克是我小學三年級的同班同學

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不過我後來被留級

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而我被退學了

183
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所以你選擇棄暗投明？收入如何？

184
00:10:25,126 --> 00:10:28,376
這個嘛，我只能告訴你

185
00:10:28,459 --> 00:10:30,251
我每個月都收支平衡

186
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天啊！我每個月都入不敷出！

187
00:10:32,543 --> 00:10:35,126
你公司還缺員工嗎？

188
00:10:35,209 --> 00:10:38,293
不知道，要先問我們老大，缺嗎？

189
00:10:38,376 --> 00:10:40,293
同事當然越多越好

190
00:10:41,001 --> 00:10:42,501
好吧，就讓我吃點虧

191
00:10:42,584 --> 00:10:44,459
但首先，你是免費勞工

192
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太好了，第一天就加薪！

193
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然後第二…

194
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你欠我兩個人情了

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（結束）

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不到300元就能驅魔

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其實只要200元，開發票才會多收錢

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小心點，惡魔統領，他將來踹你屁股

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00:11:05,543 --> 00:11:08,668
小心點，巴特西法，下個目標就是你

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字幕翻譯：樓艾苓