1 00:00:08,635 --> 00:00:10,262 Would you make me some scrambled egg? 2 00:00:10,345 --> 00:00:11,805 Yeah. I'll make you scrambled eggs. 3 00:00:12,305 --> 00:00:14,724 -You want cheese? -Yeah, a little bit of cheese. 4 00:00:16,308 --> 00:00:21,523 I love cooking with my kids because I think it's such a good way 5 00:00:21,606 --> 00:00:26,653 to teach them patience, a little bit of chemistry 6 00:00:26,736 --> 00:00:27,946 and a lot of math. 7 00:00:28,029 --> 00:00:30,949 You think, like, cooking sort of is a metaphor? 8 00:00:31,032 --> 00:00:32,701 Because, I mean, to some extent 9 00:00:32,784 --> 00:00:35,537 it's kind of like raising kids, don't you think? 10 00:00:35,620 --> 00:00:38,540 I mean, you do the best you can. It's not gonna be perfect. 11 00:00:38,623 --> 00:00:39,624 Yeah. I mean, 12 00:00:39,708 --> 00:00:42,752 but there are times if, like, you use salt when you should've used sugar… 13 00:00:42,836 --> 00:00:44,921 -Yeah. -…where you have to start over. 14 00:00:45,547 --> 00:00:49,092 I think also part of being a parent is helping your kids understand 15 00:00:49,175 --> 00:00:52,846 that even if they work really hard, they may not be the best at something. 16 00:00:52,929 --> 00:00:54,556 -Exactly. -But they can still love it. 17 00:00:54,639 --> 00:00:56,391 They can still enjoy it. 18 00:00:57,225 --> 00:00:59,603 You know, being a parent is, like, the best thing I ever did 19 00:00:59,686 --> 00:01:00,979 and the hardest thing I ever did. 20 00:01:01,062 --> 00:01:02,314 I'm glad you still feel that way 21 00:01:02,397 --> 00:01:03,398 -standing next to me. -I do. 22 00:01:03,481 --> 00:01:07,360 The relationship between, you know, mothers and daughters is 23 00:01:07,444 --> 00:01:11,615 both the most extraordinary, close, wonderful relationship, 24 00:01:11,698 --> 00:01:14,075 but also fraught because, you know, 25 00:01:14,159 --> 00:01:18,330 you want so much to both protect and nurture 26 00:01:18,413 --> 00:01:19,873 but, at the same time, 27 00:01:19,956 --> 00:01:21,458 -create an independent person. -Well-- 28 00:01:21,541 --> 00:01:22,667 It's really hard. 29 00:01:22,751 --> 00:01:24,711 I don't think our relationship was ever fraught. 30 00:01:24,794 --> 00:01:27,547 Well, you were a teenager. I do remember that. 31 00:01:30,884 --> 00:01:32,552 Okay. Action shot. 32 00:01:32,636 --> 00:01:35,263 You've got a lot of women who know how to work their ovaries. 33 00:01:35,347 --> 00:01:36,848 I'm-- 34 00:01:38,016 --> 00:01:40,185 This is family. We are a family. 35 00:01:47,609 --> 00:01:49,236 Oh, my gosh. 36 00:01:49,319 --> 00:01:51,780 There's something about turning the pages of an album, 37 00:01:51,863 --> 00:01:54,491 I just have to tell ya, that I love. 38 00:01:54,574 --> 00:01:56,993 -So great. -I just love it. 39 00:01:58,578 --> 00:02:01,915 There is your grandmother, my mother, Dorothy, holding you. 40 00:02:01,998 --> 00:02:03,833 And there-- We cut off my poor dad 41 00:02:03,917 --> 00:02:05,710 but he's there, you know, leaning on his cane. 42 00:02:06,378 --> 00:02:07,379 And then, 43 00:02:07,462 --> 00:02:12,592 when I look at these great pictures from when you were born, you know, 44 00:02:12,676 --> 00:02:18,181 you just think about what an amazing, overwhelming responsibility it is 45 00:02:18,265 --> 00:02:19,641 when that baby's handed to you. 46 00:02:19,724 --> 00:02:21,476 When all of a sudden, 47 00:02:21,560 --> 00:02:26,606 you now are responsible for this, you know, new, tiny person. 48 00:02:26,690 --> 00:02:30,485 And it was a pretty daunting responsibility, and-- 49 00:02:30,569 --> 00:02:33,405 Although I remember you always telling me when I was a little girl 50 00:02:33,488 --> 00:02:36,491 -that we were gonna figure it out… -Yes. 51 00:02:36,575 --> 00:02:39,452 …and also that, you know, it might take a moment 52 00:02:39,536 --> 00:02:41,538 because you had not been a mom before 53 00:02:41,621 --> 00:02:43,540 -and I hadn't been a baby before. -That's right. 54 00:02:43,623 --> 00:02:45,917 I think that was really important for me to hear growing up, 55 00:02:46,001 --> 00:02:48,044 and I think that helped me when I became a parent. 56 00:02:48,128 --> 00:02:49,671 -It was a constant balancing act… -Yes. 57 00:02:49,754 --> 00:02:51,047 …like so much of parenting is 58 00:02:51,131 --> 00:02:53,466 and so much of, you know, mothering a daughter is. 59 00:02:54,384 --> 00:02:56,177 Oh, my gosh. There we are voting together. 60 00:02:56,261 --> 00:02:58,221 When your dad was running for president. 61 00:02:58,305 --> 00:03:01,474 -This was, like, 1992. -'92. Yep. 62 00:03:02,225 --> 00:03:04,102 Having been in the public eye, 63 00:03:04,185 --> 00:03:08,356 I did everything I could to protect you from scrutiny, 64 00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:10,317 but I also didn't wanna isolate you from it. 65 00:03:10,400 --> 00:03:12,360 So trying to strike that right balance-- 66 00:03:12,444 --> 00:03:16,656 And that balance and those dynamics inevitably shifted over time. 67 00:03:16,740 --> 00:03:17,741 Yeah. 68 00:03:18,575 --> 00:03:21,578 You know, being a mom is one of the gutsiest things you can do, 69 00:03:21,661 --> 00:03:25,081 and I think these mothers and daughters that we're talking to 70 00:03:25,165 --> 00:03:27,000 have a lot to teach us. 71 00:03:27,626 --> 00:03:30,837 That's certainly true for Goldie Hawn and her daughter Kate Hudson. 72 00:03:30,921 --> 00:03:33,715 You know, Goldie knows all about the challenges 73 00:03:33,798 --> 00:03:36,009 of navigating a public life. 74 00:03:36,509 --> 00:03:41,389 Early on in her own career as an actor, she struggled with depression and anxiety. 75 00:03:41,473 --> 00:03:45,060 I couldn't go out into public without being sick. 76 00:03:45,143 --> 00:03:49,105 I was suddenly somebody, and I didn't even know who I was yet. 77 00:03:49,773 --> 00:03:51,358 So I went to a doctor. 78 00:03:52,359 --> 00:03:54,486 She started meditating, which helped a lot, 79 00:03:54,569 --> 00:03:56,529 and she even created a nonprofit 80 00:03:56,613 --> 00:03:59,366 that teaches kids strategies for coping with stress. 81 00:03:59,449 --> 00:04:03,245 And I love that Kate shares not only her mom's acting talent 82 00:04:03,328 --> 00:04:07,249 but also her commitment to taking care of her physical and mental well-being. 83 00:04:07,332 --> 00:04:10,669 We're gonna talk to them about their mother-daughter relationship 84 00:04:10,752 --> 00:04:15,757 and how do you instill confidence and resilience and optimism. 85 00:04:16,882 --> 00:04:20,720 I also admire how Goldie and Kate bond over their love of dancing, 86 00:04:20,804 --> 00:04:22,264 a love that I share. 87 00:04:22,347 --> 00:04:25,183 It's such a fun expression of mind-body balance, 88 00:04:25,267 --> 00:04:28,311 and they are inviting us onto the dance floor. 89 00:04:33,483 --> 00:04:34,734 Mommies and daughters. 90 00:04:34,818 --> 00:04:36,278 -So lovely to see you. -Hi, honey. 91 00:04:36,361 --> 00:04:37,195 Oh, God. 92 00:04:37,279 --> 00:04:40,323 So, what have you gotten us into over here? 93 00:04:40,407 --> 00:04:42,117 I'm feeling a lesson coming on. 94 00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:45,078 I was saying to Mom, I'm so happy you guys agreed to tango because-- 95 00:04:45,161 --> 00:04:48,081 -Oh, are you kidding? She was thrilled. -I mean-- I was thrilled. 96 00:04:48,164 --> 00:04:50,041 I mean, I will always say yes to a dance lesson, 97 00:04:50,125 --> 00:04:53,503 and I also haven't had a tango lesson in probably ten years, so it's time. 98 00:04:53,587 --> 00:04:54,963 Well, this is so great. 99 00:04:56,923 --> 00:04:59,301 Just want to say, if you wanna talk about relationships, 100 00:04:59,384 --> 00:05:02,053 this is what I've done with my mother since I was a little girl. 101 00:05:02,137 --> 00:05:04,431 She leaves things places. 102 00:05:04,514 --> 00:05:06,808 And I'm like, "Oh. There's Mom's jacket." 103 00:05:06,892 --> 00:05:11,229 By the end of any time we're out, I'm holding all of her stuff. 104 00:05:11,313 --> 00:05:13,440 Glasses, the keys. "Where's the keys to my car?" 105 00:05:13,523 --> 00:05:15,191 I got 'em, Mom. I got your keys. 106 00:05:15,275 --> 00:05:17,527 I'd like to say she's lying, but she's not. 107 00:05:18,528 --> 00:05:20,238 All right. We're ready. Okay. 108 00:05:20,322 --> 00:05:21,323 Tell us what to do. 109 00:05:21,406 --> 00:05:26,953 Argentine tango. It is about partnership, so it's gonna be always 100% of each side. 110 00:05:27,037 --> 00:05:28,955 The passion is just part of tango. 111 00:05:29,039 --> 00:05:32,918 It has the connection. It has trust. You have to let go. 112 00:05:33,001 --> 00:05:35,587 When we start something, we need a structure. Right? 113 00:05:35,670 --> 00:05:40,008 If I want to lead, my left hand is gonna be outside. Okay? 114 00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:42,302 One, two. 115 00:05:43,178 --> 00:05:44,512 And we dance in a box. 116 00:05:45,096 --> 00:05:48,975 And then the specifics of the lead. If there is a will, there is a way. 117 00:05:49,059 --> 00:05:50,894 You know what you wanna do, make it happen. 118 00:05:50,977 --> 00:05:54,481 -All right. Do you wanna lead, Mom? -No, I want you to lead. 119 00:05:56,441 --> 00:05:58,318 What's happening? Okay. 120 00:05:58,401 --> 00:05:59,694 Let's go to the side this time. 121 00:05:59,778 --> 00:06:01,321 -To the ri-- -This way. 122 00:06:03,406 --> 00:06:07,118 You're just doing whatever I'm telling you to do. 123 00:06:10,705 --> 00:06:12,499 I also just got usurped. 124 00:06:12,582 --> 00:06:14,584 -How'd you lead each other? -That's interesting. 125 00:06:14,668 --> 00:06:16,586 I was leading, and then my mom got a little bored. 126 00:06:16,670 --> 00:06:17,796 Then she turned me. 127 00:06:17,879 --> 00:06:20,882 That's what happened to me. I was leading, then Mom was like, "Okay." 128 00:06:21,716 --> 00:06:23,802 "I want you to lead, but only for about 20 seconds." 129 00:06:23,885 --> 00:06:25,554 -Yeah, right? -Exactly. 130 00:06:25,637 --> 00:06:27,722 Now that you got a really good hang of it, 131 00:06:27,806 --> 00:06:29,641 I think it's time for you to dance with Carlos. 132 00:06:29,724 --> 00:06:31,393 So, you're sitting in the seats. 133 00:06:31,476 --> 00:06:34,354 -Waiting for someone to come and ask us. -And he's gonna come and ask you. 134 00:06:34,437 --> 00:06:37,274 -Oh, I see. -There you go. 135 00:06:37,357 --> 00:06:39,401 I think she's gonna be the first one. 136 00:06:39,943 --> 00:06:41,152 He picked me. 137 00:06:51,496 --> 00:06:52,414 Mom. 138 00:06:53,873 --> 00:06:54,874 Love it. 139 00:06:58,962 --> 00:07:01,464 -She's a natural. -She is a natural. 140 00:07:16,730 --> 00:07:19,858 -Bravo. That was good. -Yay! That was so great. 141 00:07:19,941 --> 00:07:21,276 I'm so proud of you. 142 00:07:21,860 --> 00:07:23,904 -You all wanna go outside? -Yes. 143 00:07:24,487 --> 00:07:26,323 Such a beautiful day. 144 00:07:26,406 --> 00:07:30,452 We were talking during the dance lesson about how important it is to move 145 00:07:30,535 --> 00:07:31,828 and sort of lose yourself. 146 00:07:31,912 --> 00:07:34,414 You literally become, you know, one with yourself, 147 00:07:34,497 --> 00:07:37,667 which helps us into understanding what mindfulness is. 148 00:07:37,751 --> 00:07:41,963 So, it's the one thing that we wanna be aware of as a parent, you know, 149 00:07:42,047 --> 00:07:44,633 is that emotional contagion is real. 150 00:07:44,716 --> 00:07:46,635 So, children feel what you're feeling. 151 00:07:46,718 --> 00:07:48,553 And how to be tuned into your kids. 152 00:07:48,637 --> 00:07:52,599 I mean, I know my mom being attuned to me gives me an opportunity 153 00:07:52,682 --> 00:07:55,602 -to witness my own emotional state. -That's a-- Yeah. 154 00:07:55,685 --> 00:07:59,648 But how did you two navigate your wanting to be an actress, 155 00:07:59,731 --> 00:08:04,653 your wanting to be in the same profession where your mom had been so successful? 156 00:08:05,362 --> 00:08:07,948 I think I was, like, 11-- or 10, even, when I was like, 157 00:08:08,031 --> 00:08:10,450 "Mom, I'm gonna be an actress." 158 00:08:10,533 --> 00:08:12,369 She's like, "Okay." 159 00:08:12,452 --> 00:08:15,121 -"Slow down. Go to your room." -"And go back to fifth grade." 160 00:08:15,205 --> 00:08:16,748 "And go back to fifth grade." 161 00:08:18,250 --> 00:08:21,127 But what you did do is 162 00:08:21,211 --> 00:08:24,339 that she allowed me an opportunity to audition for something. What she-- 163 00:08:24,422 --> 00:08:26,007 -Do you remember what that was? -Yes. 164 00:08:26,091 --> 00:08:28,051 It was-- It was a sitcom with Howie Mandel. 165 00:08:28,134 --> 00:08:29,803 -You're kidding. -Wow. 166 00:08:29,886 --> 00:08:32,556 Yeah, and Mom, didn't tell me this, 167 00:08:32,639 --> 00:08:34,933 but I actually ended up getting the part. 168 00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:36,726 -What did you tell her? -They wanted her. 169 00:08:36,810 --> 00:08:39,187 -Did you tell her she didn't get it? -Oh, yeah. 170 00:08:39,270 --> 00:08:41,898 "They went to someone else," and, you know, "It's fine." 171 00:08:41,981 --> 00:08:45,944 And kind of, like, gave me a little taste to then just wanna go back and be a kid. 172 00:08:46,027 --> 00:08:49,614 I really wanted her to have as normal a life as she could have 173 00:08:49,698 --> 00:08:50,991 up until her graduation. 174 00:08:51,074 --> 00:08:53,076 Other than that, I let it go. 175 00:08:53,159 --> 00:08:54,869 No more controlling anything. 176 00:08:54,953 --> 00:08:57,581 -It doesn't mean it's easy. Doesn't mean-- -Doesn't mean it's easy. 177 00:08:57,664 --> 00:09:00,959 -That you always agree. -No. We know that very well. 178 00:09:01,042 --> 00:09:02,836 We learn our ways, right? 179 00:09:02,919 --> 00:09:05,839 And then, when you do need to say something that you need to say, 180 00:09:05,922 --> 00:09:08,258 you say it, but not all the time… 181 00:09:08,341 --> 00:09:11,136 -Not-- Yeah. -…because it doesn't help anything. 182 00:09:11,219 --> 00:09:15,223 I came out with a lot of "guts." 183 00:09:15,307 --> 00:09:19,269 It's been my journey to be more mind and heart. 184 00:09:19,352 --> 00:09:24,566 Because I know, as I have built businesses or I'm working on a set, 185 00:09:24,649 --> 00:09:28,612 we all come with something really powerful. 186 00:09:28,695 --> 00:09:32,991 And what I like to tell young girls, especially, like, in leadership positions, 187 00:09:33,074 --> 00:09:35,160 is that leadership doesn't look one way. 188 00:09:35,243 --> 00:09:40,081 It's a giant rainbow of different personalities and strengths 189 00:09:40,165 --> 00:09:43,084 that can come together to create something really powerful. 190 00:09:43,168 --> 00:09:46,421 You know, that's as gutsy as, I think, stepping out onto a stage. 191 00:09:51,760 --> 00:09:54,179 -You are so cute. -You wanna party. 192 00:09:54,262 --> 00:09:55,805 Hillary's like, "Let's move." 193 00:09:56,848 --> 00:09:58,099 Let's watch out. 194 00:09:59,601 --> 00:10:01,061 Mom collision. 195 00:10:06,942 --> 00:10:09,861 -These are pictures that I love… -Oh, my gosh. You're so cute. 196 00:10:09,945 --> 00:10:11,196 …of my mother and me. 197 00:10:11,279 --> 00:10:14,407 -You're so cute. -Yeah, I am. Look at me. 198 00:10:14,491 --> 00:10:17,118 But why didn't you ever dress me up like that? 199 00:10:17,202 --> 00:10:18,870 You would never have stood for it. 200 00:10:18,954 --> 00:10:20,747 You were very particular, even at a young age, 201 00:10:20,830 --> 00:10:21,998 about what I could put on you. 202 00:10:22,749 --> 00:10:26,253 This is my mother graduating from high school. 203 00:10:26,336 --> 00:10:29,422 Which is really an extraordinary achievement for your mom 204 00:10:29,506 --> 00:10:31,383 -'cause her grandparents kicked her out. -Right. 205 00:10:31,466 --> 00:10:34,386 Basically, she was abandoned and deserted by-- 206 00:10:34,469 --> 00:10:36,471 -By her parents, then her grandparents. -Yeah. 207 00:10:36,555 --> 00:10:39,599 You know, looking at my mother, as I learn more about her life, 208 00:10:39,683 --> 00:10:44,437 it was just really incredibly impressive how hard she worked at being a mother, 209 00:10:44,521 --> 00:10:46,690 'cause she didn't have one of her own. 210 00:10:46,773 --> 00:10:49,025 But that's the difference between mothers and mothering, right? 211 00:10:49,109 --> 00:10:49,943 Yeah. 212 00:10:50,026 --> 00:10:52,529 'Cause if you're really mothering someone, you never give up on them. 213 00:10:53,446 --> 00:11:00,036 That brings to mind Ceyenne, who has in effect mothered a lot of kids 214 00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:03,832 who've been kicked out of their own houses because they're gay or they're trans 215 00:11:03,915 --> 00:11:07,294 or they feel that there's no future for them. Community. 216 00:11:07,377 --> 00:11:10,130 She's created a family of choice. 217 00:11:10,213 --> 00:11:13,174 -Right. Not a family of birth, but-- -A family of choice. 218 00:11:23,310 --> 00:11:26,438 Well, hello. I hear there's a party back here. 219 00:11:26,521 --> 00:11:29,149 -How are you? Come on. Yeah, def-- -You've got so many back here. 220 00:11:29,232 --> 00:11:30,692 -Hi, everybody. -Got some friends. 221 00:11:30,775 --> 00:11:32,444 -Hi. -Hi. 222 00:11:32,527 --> 00:11:35,280 -I'm Twinkle. Nice to meet you. -Good to meet you. 223 00:11:35,363 --> 00:11:36,781 -This was one of my students. -Nice to meet you. 224 00:11:36,865 --> 00:11:40,285 -You're kidding. Oh, my gosh. -Yes. I was a student at Mailman. Yes. 225 00:11:40,368 --> 00:11:41,202 That's so great. 226 00:11:41,286 --> 00:11:45,248 When Dorcas called me and said, "My professor is Chelsea," 227 00:11:45,332 --> 00:11:47,667 -I said, "We doin' something right." -Yeah. 228 00:11:49,794 --> 00:11:51,463 Ceyenne started GLITS in 2015. 229 00:11:52,088 --> 00:11:55,050 It's an inclusive community housing program for trans youth, 230 00:11:55,133 --> 00:11:58,053 who experience homelessness at alarming rates. 231 00:11:58,553 --> 00:12:03,016 And what she does is about so much more than putting a roof over someone's head. 232 00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:09,981 It's not helping them if we're just giving them a MetroCard and an HIV test. 233 00:12:10,065 --> 00:12:12,234 Let's get them to where they need to be. 234 00:12:12,317 --> 00:12:14,319 Education. It starts there. 235 00:12:14,903 --> 00:12:17,405 I met her when I didn't have my high school diploma. 236 00:12:17,489 --> 00:12:19,741 I'm graduating in the fall, 237 00:12:19,824 --> 00:12:23,119 and I'm hoping to go to Columbia or Georgetown with her help. 238 00:12:23,203 --> 00:12:26,206 -She wants to be a lawyer. I support that. -Yes! 239 00:12:26,289 --> 00:12:28,959 And her, she stood out so smart. 240 00:12:29,042 --> 00:12:32,045 She's now on her way of her master's and PhD. 241 00:12:32,128 --> 00:12:34,130 -What'll you get your PhD in? -Social welfare. 242 00:12:34,214 --> 00:12:36,758 -Her encouragement meant a lot, didn't it? -Absolutely. Yeah. 243 00:12:36,841 --> 00:12:40,303 Her encouragement and her gentle threats. 244 00:12:41,304 --> 00:12:42,973 It was all of that. 245 00:12:44,891 --> 00:12:49,396 I consider being a mom a powerful thing. 246 00:12:49,479 --> 00:12:53,149 I have children all over the world that I adore and love. 247 00:12:54,192 --> 00:12:57,445 Often we were not invited to Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, 248 00:12:57,529 --> 00:13:01,241 the things that most people celebrate with their families, 249 00:13:01,324 --> 00:13:04,661 so me being a mom allows me to create all those moments 250 00:13:04,744 --> 00:13:08,748 to make up for decades of not being able to have that. 251 00:13:09,374 --> 00:13:12,335 Often people like me run away from home, we're unsupported, 252 00:13:12,419 --> 00:13:15,964 because we choose to seek our authentic lives in this world. 253 00:13:16,047 --> 00:13:17,757 But what would happen if we had parents 254 00:13:17,841 --> 00:13:20,218 who supported us through that journey, right? 255 00:13:20,302 --> 00:13:21,845 And so, this is what she fills in 256 00:13:21,928 --> 00:13:24,598 for a lot of the young people who cross her path. 257 00:13:24,681 --> 00:13:26,850 -It's really a parenting role. -It is. 258 00:13:26,933 --> 00:13:29,728 You can't teach lessons to younger people 259 00:13:29,811 --> 00:13:32,564 unless you teach them the path you had to go to get there. 260 00:13:32,647 --> 00:13:33,481 Right. 261 00:13:37,944 --> 00:13:40,906 I left home when I was a teenager. 262 00:13:40,989 --> 00:13:44,117 I didn't necessarily not have my mom. 263 00:13:44,200 --> 00:13:46,411 I had my mom with conditions. 264 00:13:47,078 --> 00:13:50,165 Conditions I wasn't willing to barter on, 265 00:13:50,248 --> 00:13:53,251 and that was my self-expression, who I was. 266 00:13:57,464 --> 00:14:01,343 I was suicidal half my life. I couldn't avoid that. 267 00:14:01,968 --> 00:14:03,887 Flawless Sabrina, 268 00:14:03,970 --> 00:14:07,474 she was a person that helped me as a young person struggling 269 00:14:07,557 --> 00:14:09,517 and going through gender identity. 270 00:14:10,227 --> 00:14:14,439 Well, my mother calls me Jack, but I work under the name of Sabrina, 271 00:14:14,522 --> 00:14:18,151 and all the queens all call me Sabrina. 272 00:14:19,361 --> 00:14:21,988 Having Flawless as a transgender mom, 273 00:14:22,072 --> 00:14:24,783 she was beneficial in keeping me alive. 274 00:14:25,408 --> 00:14:28,787 When I was homeless and living, literally, in Central Park, 275 00:14:28,870 --> 00:14:31,331 she seen me in the park, and she said, "Get up." 276 00:14:31,414 --> 00:14:33,124 And I said, "I'm not going with you." 277 00:14:33,208 --> 00:14:35,502 And she said, "Yes, you are. Get your bags. Come." 278 00:14:35,585 --> 00:14:38,046 And when we went in the building, the door was open. 279 00:14:38,129 --> 00:14:40,590 But she said, "My door stays open. You'll know this. 280 00:14:40,674 --> 00:14:44,469 I never lock my door, so somebody like you can always walk through it." 281 00:14:44,553 --> 00:14:46,304 Wow. Had you ever met her before? 282 00:14:46,388 --> 00:14:49,558 No. And then she did the most effective thing, 283 00:14:49,641 --> 00:14:54,729 to take me back to my mom's house and explain gender identity to my mom. 284 00:14:54,813 --> 00:14:56,982 How many people were willing to take that time 285 00:14:57,065 --> 00:15:00,235 to explain to a phobic parent 286 00:15:00,318 --> 00:15:02,821 this is no reason to throw your child out? 287 00:15:02,904 --> 00:15:06,449 I would take these lessons from her and give it to all of them. 288 00:15:12,372 --> 00:15:16,293 She gave me the familial love. It was the first time I ever experienced that. 289 00:15:16,877 --> 00:15:18,795 There's nothing more transformative than that. 290 00:15:23,508 --> 00:15:27,012 Like, when I was a young trans girl of 15 years old 291 00:15:27,095 --> 00:15:28,763 running around the streets of San Francisco, 292 00:15:28,847 --> 00:15:32,183 you were a sex worker, or you were pretty enough to be a performer. 293 00:15:32,267 --> 00:15:34,144 These things like getting a nine-to-five job 294 00:15:34,227 --> 00:15:36,646 and pursuing a degree were not options. 295 00:15:36,730 --> 00:15:41,902 So, by me doing this, somebody can see and think, "I can do this too." 296 00:15:41,985 --> 00:15:44,404 -'Cause you're making it visible. -'Cause I'm making it visible. 297 00:15:44,487 --> 00:15:47,449 When she didn't even believe in herself, I believed in her. 298 00:15:47,532 --> 00:15:48,825 I believe in all of these babies. 299 00:15:58,293 --> 00:16:01,254 Now that me and my mom are in sort of a good place… 300 00:16:01,338 --> 00:16:03,048 still a little angry about it, 301 00:16:03,131 --> 00:16:04,466 but let me tell you. 302 00:16:04,549 --> 00:16:07,510 We had a party, and my mom was so confused. 303 00:16:07,594 --> 00:16:11,890 There was the gender nonconforming, there was everybody here. 304 00:16:11,973 --> 00:16:15,810 And my mother, God bless her cute, old behind, she said, 305 00:16:15,894 --> 00:16:18,063 "Well, I'm transgender." 306 00:16:19,189 --> 00:16:22,484 And I said, "Ma." She said, "I know. I just wanted to say it." 307 00:16:25,237 --> 00:16:28,156 And in that moment, all was forgiven. 308 00:16:39,167 --> 00:16:42,337 These are great pictures from when you were about 12. 309 00:16:43,463 --> 00:16:44,673 In the White House. 310 00:16:44,756 --> 00:16:46,633 Look. You're already as tall as I am. 311 00:16:46,716 --> 00:16:48,593 I find that deeply disturbing. 312 00:16:48,677 --> 00:16:51,096 That was a really big moment for me, I have to say. 313 00:16:51,179 --> 00:16:53,139 I think I made you stand back-to-back with me… 314 00:16:53,223 --> 00:16:56,268 -You did. Yes, you did. -…for anyone who was around. 315 00:16:56,351 --> 00:16:58,061 That's so sweet. 316 00:16:58,144 --> 00:16:59,229 So great. 317 00:17:00,313 --> 00:17:04,484 It's so interesting the way children at age 12, 13, 318 00:17:04,568 --> 00:17:06,987 they wanna know where their place is, 319 00:17:07,070 --> 00:17:09,698 and the first place is your family. 320 00:17:09,781 --> 00:17:13,493 And mothers go to the ends of the Earth 321 00:17:13,577 --> 00:17:16,912 to make sure that they have what their children need. 322 00:17:17,747 --> 00:17:20,833 That's why I wanna speak with Meriam Al Sultan. 323 00:17:20,917 --> 00:17:22,794 She's a mother from Saudi Arabia 324 00:17:22,878 --> 00:17:25,881 who found herself stuck in a turbulent marriage, 325 00:17:25,964 --> 00:17:28,007 and she was learning to be a magician 326 00:17:28,091 --> 00:17:31,720 in a country where performing magic was forbidden 327 00:17:31,803 --> 00:17:36,308 and where a lot of important aspects of women's lives are still decided 328 00:17:36,391 --> 00:17:38,059 by male guardians. 329 00:17:38,143 --> 00:17:41,021 She made a decision to leave with her daughter, 330 00:17:41,104 --> 00:17:43,940 -taking her daughter away… -I mean, talk about a gutsy decision. 331 00:17:44,024 --> 00:17:45,525 …from everything she had known 332 00:17:45,609 --> 00:17:47,402 to give her daughter more options, right? 333 00:17:47,485 --> 00:17:50,780 Well, to give her daughter the chance to pursue whatever dream she may have, 334 00:17:50,864 --> 00:17:53,116 whether it was in magic or something else. 335 00:17:53,199 --> 00:17:54,200 -Whatever else. -Whatever else. 336 00:17:54,284 --> 00:17:56,286 Maybe they'll teach us some tricks. 337 00:17:56,369 --> 00:17:57,954 I don't know if they'll reveal anything. 338 00:17:58,038 --> 00:18:00,040 I don't know. We'll have to find out. 339 00:18:04,169 --> 00:18:05,420 There we go. 340 00:18:07,464 --> 00:18:10,050 "Step up. Artemis the Owl." 341 00:18:10,133 --> 00:18:12,093 "Say the magic words to enter"? 342 00:18:12,177 --> 00:18:13,553 Abracadabra? 343 00:18:15,263 --> 00:18:16,389 Open sesame? 344 00:18:18,642 --> 00:18:20,101 Look at you, Mom. 345 00:18:21,394 --> 00:18:22,896 All right. Here we go. 346 00:18:29,861 --> 00:18:33,490 "Invisible Irma invites you to join her in the piano room." 347 00:18:38,495 --> 00:18:40,622 I feel like I should be, like, processing. 348 00:18:41,289 --> 00:18:42,749 Oh, wow! 349 00:18:46,711 --> 00:18:50,507 Since she was a little girl, Meriam has been practicing magic, 350 00:18:50,590 --> 00:18:54,886 a passion she continued pursuing after moving to the United States in 2013. 351 00:18:54,970 --> 00:18:56,763 -Hi, Meriam and Judy. -Welcome. 352 00:18:56,846 --> 00:18:58,515 Hi. Judy, very nice… 353 00:18:58,598 --> 00:19:01,518 Meriam's daughter, Judy, fell in love with magic too. 354 00:19:01,601 --> 00:19:04,521 And now we get to see the two of them in action together 355 00:19:04,604 --> 00:19:07,399 at the renowned Magic Castle in Los Angeles. 356 00:19:07,941 --> 00:19:10,652 -Just like people… -…we come in different colors. 357 00:19:10,735 --> 00:19:12,862 -Different hues. -Different shapes. 358 00:19:12,946 --> 00:19:15,240 -Different interests. -And different personalities. 359 00:19:15,323 --> 00:19:19,619 Unfortunately, our differences can be what separate us. 360 00:19:21,204 --> 00:19:24,833 Throughout history, they've led to great conflicts. 361 00:19:25,333 --> 00:19:28,169 -Patriarchy. -Racism. 362 00:19:28,670 --> 00:19:29,796 Slavery. 363 00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:31,131 Wars. 364 00:19:31,214 --> 00:19:36,344 Hillary, I want you to think of a time where you felt disconnected from people 365 00:19:36,428 --> 00:19:38,597 and break the thread just like so. 366 00:19:38,680 --> 00:19:41,266 And, Chelsea, I'd like you to do the same. 367 00:19:42,183 --> 00:19:43,977 It's heartbreaking, isn't it? 368 00:19:44,060 --> 00:19:46,271 Yet, there's still things that can bring us… 369 00:19:46,354 --> 00:19:47,355 …together. 370 00:19:47,439 --> 00:19:51,902 Now, Hillary, I want you to collect all the pieces of the thread 371 00:19:51,985 --> 00:19:53,904 and just turn them into a ball. 372 00:19:54,863 --> 00:19:55,864 That's great. 373 00:19:58,992 --> 00:20:01,661 When we seek the things we share in common… 374 00:20:01,745 --> 00:20:04,664 …we find unity and a shared sense of humanity. 375 00:20:06,416 --> 00:20:10,629 The truth is that we are far more alike… 376 00:20:11,463 --> 00:20:13,048 …than we are different. 377 00:20:13,798 --> 00:20:16,218 -Wow. -Together we can make the world better. 378 00:20:16,301 --> 00:20:19,095 -That is amazing. -Oh, my gosh! 379 00:20:19,179 --> 00:20:21,306 -Amen to that. Right? -Amen. Wow. 380 00:20:23,475 --> 00:20:28,313 Do you think you are the first or only Saudi woman who's doing magic? 381 00:20:28,396 --> 00:20:29,689 As I was growing up, 382 00:20:29,773 --> 00:20:32,776 women were not allowed to perform on a stage, period. 383 00:20:32,859 --> 00:20:34,402 So not only magic. 384 00:20:34,486 --> 00:20:36,029 Not to perform at all. 385 00:20:36,112 --> 00:20:39,616 And so I don't know if I was the first one. 386 00:20:39,699 --> 00:20:42,077 I only started to perform actually in front of people 387 00:20:42,160 --> 00:20:43,453 when I came to the US. 388 00:20:43,536 --> 00:20:47,415 And tell us a little bit about your journey here. 389 00:20:47,499 --> 00:20:49,459 It's a hard decision. Still is. 390 00:20:50,544 --> 00:20:54,047 Basically, when I came to the US, I was still married. 391 00:20:55,382 --> 00:20:56,925 I came with my child. 392 00:20:57,008 --> 00:20:59,719 And I wanted to get a divorce when we were there, 393 00:20:59,803 --> 00:21:01,221 but it was extremely difficult. 394 00:21:01,304 --> 00:21:04,516 And women in Saudi Arabia still cannot file for a divorce. 395 00:21:04,599 --> 00:21:06,851 It's the man who divorces the woman. 396 00:21:07,727 --> 00:21:10,730 And so I felt like it's not only my life now 397 00:21:10,814 --> 00:21:13,108 that is being controlled but also my child's life 398 00:21:13,191 --> 00:21:14,442 because she's also a girl. 399 00:21:14,526 --> 00:21:16,861 And so I decided to stay, and I applied for asylum. 400 00:21:16,945 --> 00:21:19,322 And we're still here. Yeah. 401 00:21:19,990 --> 00:21:23,535 You know, walking around here, we see so many male magicians. 402 00:21:23,618 --> 00:21:25,453 And certainly I grew up with this image 403 00:21:25,537 --> 00:21:28,748 of sort of, like, the male magician and just the female assistant. 404 00:21:28,832 --> 00:21:31,042 -Right. -So you were already breaking the mold. 405 00:21:31,126 --> 00:21:33,795 It can be difficult for a woman to start that. 406 00:21:34,379 --> 00:21:37,215 If they are men, they would be openly teaching them. 407 00:21:37,299 --> 00:21:40,260 And maybe if it's a woman, 408 00:21:40,343 --> 00:21:42,679 they would offer them to be their assistant. 409 00:21:42,762 --> 00:21:47,309 And so it took a lot of time for people to break these gender roles. 410 00:21:47,392 --> 00:21:50,896 As women make progress, there's always a backlash. 411 00:21:50,979 --> 00:21:55,692 People in society, forces at work that wanna push that progress back. 412 00:21:56,860 --> 00:21:59,029 What do you hope for your daughter Judy? 413 00:21:59,112 --> 00:22:04,743 What kind of future would you like to see her be able to have? 414 00:22:04,826 --> 00:22:09,748 As I was growing up, we had those gender roles drawn, 415 00:22:09,831 --> 00:22:11,875 and nobody can cross them. 416 00:22:11,958 --> 00:22:15,712 I was forced into staying home, and a dress code, 417 00:22:15,795 --> 00:22:18,465 and women cannot do this, and women cannot do that. 418 00:22:18,548 --> 00:22:21,259 So I want her to be able to do whatever she wants. 419 00:22:21,343 --> 00:22:25,013 I don't think there are limitations for what she can be. 420 00:22:25,096 --> 00:22:26,556 I love that. 421 00:22:30,977 --> 00:22:32,729 -There's your wedding! -I know. 422 00:22:32,812 --> 00:22:35,357 Since we're here talking about gutsy women, I do-- 423 00:22:35,440 --> 00:22:38,777 I miss my grandmother. I think about her every day. 424 00:22:38,860 --> 00:22:43,114 This is just a walk down memory lane for me. 425 00:22:43,198 --> 00:22:46,034 I do love that photograph of us, I have to say. 426 00:22:46,785 --> 00:22:49,496 Of course, one of my all-time favorite pictures 427 00:22:49,579 --> 00:22:53,500 is this one where I'm trying to impart some maternal wisdom, 428 00:22:53,583 --> 00:22:55,001 and you are not having it. 429 00:22:55,085 --> 00:22:57,295 -You are totally not having it. -But look, I'm mimicking you. 430 00:22:57,379 --> 00:22:59,214 -I'm learning from you. -That's true. 431 00:22:59,297 --> 00:23:01,841 You put your hands on your hips. I put my hands on my hips. 432 00:23:01,925 --> 00:23:02,926 I think that's so true. 433 00:23:04,511 --> 00:23:10,642 I was excited but apprehensive about how I would perform as a mother. 434 00:23:10,725 --> 00:23:12,811 Because you're expected to be perfect, 435 00:23:12,894 --> 00:23:14,980 and you know that's, like, totally unrealistic. 436 00:23:15,063 --> 00:23:16,773 -And unhealthy. -And unhealthy. 437 00:23:16,856 --> 00:23:19,901 -It's an unhealthy expectation. -Well, and it's unattainable. 438 00:23:19,985 --> 00:23:23,196 And that's why I want to hear the story of the Kudjis. 439 00:23:23,989 --> 00:23:28,451 Here was this immigrant mom, Cynthia, who raised her daughter by herself. 440 00:23:29,786 --> 00:23:32,914 It turns out she not only became a doctor. 441 00:23:32,998 --> 00:23:34,916 So did her daughter. 442 00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:39,963 And I'm anxious to talk to them about, how do you try to grow a gutsy woman? 443 00:23:40,046 --> 00:23:44,175 How do you get away from, you know, the curse of perfectionism? 444 00:23:47,596 --> 00:23:49,055 We were doing research, 445 00:23:49,139 --> 00:23:52,350 and we don't know of any other mother-daughter 446 00:23:52,434 --> 00:23:55,103 who went to medical school at the same time 447 00:23:55,186 --> 00:23:58,148 and then matched for your residency. 448 00:23:58,231 --> 00:23:59,816 We googled it too. 449 00:24:01,026 --> 00:24:03,194 So, tell us a little bit about your background. 450 00:24:03,278 --> 00:24:05,780 So I went to nursing school. Right? 451 00:24:05,864 --> 00:24:08,366 And worked as an RN for, like, eight years. 452 00:24:08,450 --> 00:24:10,660 And Jasmine was still too young 453 00:24:10,744 --> 00:24:12,871 for me to go to medical school. 454 00:24:12,954 --> 00:24:16,249 I was like, "You know what? I'ma go and be a nurse practitioner." 455 00:24:16,333 --> 00:24:17,709 When did you decide to go? 456 00:24:17,792 --> 00:24:20,378 I pretty much always knew I wanted to go to medical school 457 00:24:20,462 --> 00:24:21,713 'cause I was always with my mom. 458 00:24:21,796 --> 00:24:23,840 Like, even when she was, you know, taking her classes, 459 00:24:23,924 --> 00:24:26,509 like, I was there, you know, in her physics classes, 460 00:24:26,593 --> 00:24:27,677 in her nursing classes. 461 00:24:27,761 --> 00:24:30,388 Actually, I wanted her to be a doctor from the beginning. 462 00:24:30,472 --> 00:24:33,850 -Did you? -So I was like, "This is a stethoscope." 463 00:24:34,809 --> 00:24:36,311 So when she was playing Operation, 464 00:24:36,394 --> 00:24:38,313 it was, like, much more serious? 465 00:24:38,396 --> 00:24:40,690 -"You don't do that there." Yeah. -"You don't do that." 466 00:24:41,858 --> 00:24:45,570 When I was growing up, there just weren't that many figures, 467 00:24:45,654 --> 00:24:46,947 like African American figures. 468 00:24:47,030 --> 00:24:52,160 And if you don't have that person or that image to see that it is possible, 469 00:24:52,244 --> 00:24:54,788 it just makes it that much more difficult, you know? 470 00:24:54,871 --> 00:24:57,832 And I knew that I would be her biggest influence, you know? 471 00:24:57,916 --> 00:24:59,918 So I could not give up. 472 00:25:00,001 --> 00:25:02,754 If I don't make it, it gives her an excuse not to make it. 473 00:25:02,837 --> 00:25:04,381 I thank my mom for that. 474 00:25:04,464 --> 00:25:05,632 Because, like she said, 475 00:25:05,715 --> 00:25:08,301 because I saw her doing it, I was like, "Oh, yeah, I can do that." 476 00:25:08,385 --> 00:25:10,011 You know, like, it wasn't even a question. 477 00:25:10,095 --> 00:25:13,682 So, my mom has really curated my life. 478 00:25:14,224 --> 00:25:16,017 I think you deserve a little credit too though. 479 00:25:16,101 --> 00:25:17,769 -I think so too. -I mean, yeah. 480 00:25:18,645 --> 00:25:22,566 The Kudjis' courage inspired us to decide to conquer a fear together 481 00:25:22,649 --> 00:25:24,317 at a nearby honey farm. 482 00:25:25,151 --> 00:25:27,779 These are gonna slide on just like big onesies. 483 00:25:27,862 --> 00:25:29,239 You don't need to put the hoods on. 484 00:25:29,322 --> 00:25:32,325 We'll wait till we get to the apiary and actually open up the hives to do that. 485 00:25:32,409 --> 00:25:35,620 -Okay, yeah. -Open up the hives? Okay! 486 00:25:35,704 --> 00:25:38,456 Did you notice I'm between the doctors? 487 00:25:42,377 --> 00:25:44,629 -Welcome to my office. -Oh, wow. 488 00:25:46,381 --> 00:25:47,549 You're standing in the presence 489 00:25:47,632 --> 00:25:51,344 -of over 100,000 bees right now. -Oh, my goodness. 490 00:25:51,428 --> 00:25:54,472 What I love about bees is that they are so incredibly selfless. 491 00:25:54,556 --> 00:25:57,726 These bees right now are only living six weeks. 492 00:25:57,809 --> 00:26:00,186 And they are legitimately working themselves to death 493 00:26:00,270 --> 00:26:02,022 to benefit the next generation. 494 00:26:02,856 --> 00:26:04,774 -We could learn something from the bees. -Sure can. 495 00:26:04,858 --> 00:26:07,110 We can learn so much from the bees. 496 00:26:08,695 --> 00:26:10,488 -Oh, my God. -Oh, wow. 497 00:26:10,572 --> 00:26:14,200 Okay. 498 00:26:14,284 --> 00:26:15,535 Oh, boy. 499 00:26:15,619 --> 00:26:18,455 The majority of these are known as nurse bees. 500 00:26:18,538 --> 00:26:20,457 Those are amazing. 501 00:26:20,540 --> 00:26:22,626 -Would you like to hold them? -Okay. 502 00:26:22,709 --> 00:26:23,543 So you can-- 503 00:26:23,627 --> 00:26:25,003 -Let her do it. -I'll do it. 504 00:26:25,086 --> 00:26:26,504 She wants to impress her son. 505 00:26:26,588 --> 00:26:28,423 Hi, Charlotte, Aidan and Jasper. 506 00:26:28,506 --> 00:26:31,009 Here's Mommy with some bees. 507 00:26:31,092 --> 00:26:33,595 And here's your grandmother at a safe distance. 508 00:26:34,679 --> 00:26:36,181 -Great. Got it. -Got it? 509 00:26:36,264 --> 00:26:37,766 Wow. 510 00:26:37,849 --> 00:26:39,851 I'm about to get over this fear right now. 511 00:26:39,935 --> 00:26:41,478 -Right now. -I'm about to do it. 512 00:26:42,229 --> 00:26:45,649 Look, Jasmine. Look at this. 513 00:26:45,732 --> 00:26:48,568 -I'm so proud of you right now. -I am proud of myself! 514 00:26:48,652 --> 00:26:49,861 I'm proud of you. 515 00:26:52,113 --> 00:26:54,282 When we talk about gutsy women, you know, 516 00:26:54,366 --> 00:26:57,494 it doesn't mean you don't get discouraged or disappointed 517 00:26:57,577 --> 00:26:58,703 or face setbacks. 518 00:26:58,787 --> 00:27:00,872 Or sometimes you need people to help you keep going. 519 00:27:00,956 --> 00:27:03,667 -Yeah. -That was 100% our experience. 520 00:27:03,750 --> 00:27:05,961 I failed my first year of medical school. 521 00:27:06,044 --> 00:27:09,214 And I remember that being just, like, the most traumatic thing ever. 522 00:27:09,297 --> 00:27:12,217 I was like, "I don't know if I wanna do this anymore." 523 00:27:12,300 --> 00:27:14,052 And I remember my mom being like, 524 00:27:14,135 --> 00:27:17,264 "Jasmine, you can do this. You just need to adjust." 525 00:27:17,347 --> 00:27:19,808 You know, and I think that's the most important thing 526 00:27:19,891 --> 00:27:23,770 about becoming a successful person is learning how to adjust after failure. 527 00:27:23,853 --> 00:27:25,522 -Amen! -That's right. 528 00:27:30,986 --> 00:27:33,321 There's nothing like taking on a new adventure 529 00:27:33,405 --> 00:27:35,865 and getting to share that experience with your mom. 530 00:27:35,949 --> 00:27:37,576 Look at these great pictures. 531 00:27:37,659 --> 00:27:39,869 -We had so much fun. -Oh, my gosh. 532 00:27:39,953 --> 00:27:41,329 Oh, my gosh, Chelsea. 533 00:27:41,413 --> 00:27:44,958 Traveling around the world with you was one of the great joys 534 00:27:45,041 --> 00:27:46,543 -of being in the White House. -Agreed. 535 00:27:46,626 --> 00:27:48,003 Literally expanding my horizons. 536 00:27:48,086 --> 00:27:50,964 There we are at the Taj Mahal. That was such a great day. 537 00:27:51,798 --> 00:27:55,886 I did try to bring you into the experience that I was having 538 00:27:55,969 --> 00:27:58,221 as well as enhancing your life. 539 00:27:58,305 --> 00:27:59,890 It was such a great opportunity, 540 00:27:59,973 --> 00:28:01,933 and I was so happy you could share it with me. 541 00:28:02,017 --> 00:28:03,101 Me too. 542 00:28:03,935 --> 00:28:08,148 I've been so lucky to meet thousands of brave, gutsy people. 543 00:28:08,231 --> 00:28:11,067 Particularly, you know, mothers fighting for their children 544 00:28:11,151 --> 00:28:13,820 or trying to get a better life for their children 545 00:28:13,904 --> 00:28:16,197 or standing up against powerful interests. 546 00:28:16,281 --> 00:28:18,241 It's really humbling and also really inspiring. 547 00:28:18,867 --> 00:28:22,495 And then I think about Dolores Huerta, who's a longtime friend. 548 00:28:23,204 --> 00:28:28,043 Dolores fought alongside the great labor leader Cesar Chavez 549 00:28:28,126 --> 00:28:31,296 to unionize workers in California's grape vineyards. 550 00:28:31,379 --> 00:28:34,758 She led protests against unsafe working conditions, 551 00:28:34,841 --> 00:28:38,303 harmful pesticides and very low pay. 552 00:28:38,386 --> 00:28:42,515 And she was one of the major architects of a nationwide grape boycott. 553 00:28:42,599 --> 00:28:44,601 A thousand people were killed last year. 554 00:28:44,684 --> 00:28:46,561 And then people say, "Where at? In Vietnam?" 555 00:28:46,645 --> 00:28:50,357 And I say, "No. In the fields of the United States of America." 556 00:29:00,492 --> 00:29:02,661 The workers are on the rise. 557 00:29:02,744 --> 00:29:04,913 There will be strikes throughout the country, 558 00:29:04,996 --> 00:29:08,333 and it will not be stopped until we receive equality. 559 00:29:08,416 --> 00:29:12,212 Dolores Huerta, an old friend of mine who has worked with the union… 560 00:29:17,676 --> 00:29:21,846 She was on the front lines, standing up for labor rights, 561 00:29:21,930 --> 00:29:23,306 human rights, women's rights. 562 00:29:23,932 --> 00:29:25,892 -And she had 11 children. -Eleven children. 563 00:29:25,976 --> 00:29:28,019 And 11 children over three decades. 564 00:29:28,103 --> 00:29:31,982 Everything in this world has come from the body of a woman! 565 00:29:43,159 --> 00:29:46,913 Even after all these years, Dolores hasn't slowed down. 566 00:29:46,997 --> 00:29:48,456 Neither have her daughters, 567 00:29:48,540 --> 00:29:51,626 several of whom help run the Dolores Huerta Foundation, 568 00:29:51,710 --> 00:29:53,128 which is supporting and training 569 00:29:53,211 --> 00:29:55,964 the next generation of community organizers. 570 00:29:56,548 --> 00:29:59,134 When I'm roasting and cooking the chilies, 571 00:29:59,217 --> 00:30:03,597 the smell just brings me back to thinking of our grandmother. 572 00:30:04,222 --> 00:30:05,724 She made tamales. 573 00:30:05,807 --> 00:30:08,143 We did not learn cooking from our mother. 574 00:30:08,727 --> 00:30:11,313 No. She just cooks a few times a year. 575 00:30:11,396 --> 00:30:13,690 'Cause Mom was busy. Mom was out doing her thing, 576 00:30:13,773 --> 00:30:17,277 so we would soak up the information from the people around us. 577 00:30:18,653 --> 00:30:21,656 I can't wait to see Dolores. I think we're gonna make tamales. 578 00:30:21,740 --> 00:30:24,200 -We're definitely gonna make tamales. -You know I love tamales. 579 00:30:24,868 --> 00:30:26,703 Hello! 580 00:30:26,786 --> 00:30:30,040 -Oh, my gosh, I'm so happy to see you! -Thank you for having us. 581 00:30:30,123 --> 00:30:31,124 Welcome to our home! 582 00:30:31,207 --> 00:30:34,753 This is so exciting. To have your daughters together. 583 00:30:34,836 --> 00:30:38,465 I'll tell you, I never could have done this without them. 584 00:30:38,548 --> 00:30:41,343 It's like my youngest son, Ricky, said, "I had four mothers." 585 00:30:42,719 --> 00:30:44,387 Shall we sit and make tamales? 586 00:30:44,888 --> 00:30:46,848 How do you do this without eating everything? 587 00:30:47,599 --> 00:30:48,558 'Cause it's raw. 588 00:30:48,642 --> 00:30:50,227 -It's like raw cookie dough. -I mean-- 589 00:30:50,310 --> 00:30:53,104 Are you saying you don't eat raw cookie dough? 590 00:30:53,188 --> 00:30:55,690 -Well, you're not supposed to. -I was gonna say. 591 00:30:57,525 --> 00:30:59,903 How old were all of you when you learned to make tamales? 592 00:30:59,986 --> 00:31:02,322 When I was 18 years old. 593 00:31:02,405 --> 00:31:06,034 And one of the people who taught me was Helen Chavez, Cesar's wife. 594 00:31:06,117 --> 00:31:09,079 Do you all remember your first protest? 595 00:31:09,162 --> 00:31:13,041 I don't because we literally grew up on the picket line. 596 00:31:13,124 --> 00:31:17,128 I remember when we were boycotting grapes. I remember being in front of the Safeways. 597 00:31:17,212 --> 00:31:21,466 She stopped more people than any of us. She was passing out leaflets saying, 598 00:31:21,550 --> 00:31:22,842 "There's pesticides on the grapes." 599 00:31:22,926 --> 00:31:24,761 She was only six when she did that. 600 00:31:24,844 --> 00:31:27,264 When they were small, they never had play days. 601 00:31:27,347 --> 00:31:29,099 They had picket line days. 602 00:31:29,182 --> 00:31:30,517 Did you recruit your friends? 603 00:31:30,600 --> 00:31:33,853 In second grade, you're like, "There's something awesome happening on Saturday." 604 00:31:35,564 --> 00:31:38,358 In de la Paz, they had a hospital that was underdeveloped, 605 00:31:38,441 --> 00:31:40,360 and the kids always wanted to spend the night. 606 00:31:40,443 --> 00:31:42,654 And one time my mother was packing up her car, 607 00:31:42,737 --> 00:31:46,575 and the kids, Juanita and all of them, they're little, like ten, 11, whatever. 608 00:31:46,658 --> 00:31:49,452 They're saying, "Can we spend the night?" And my mom's saying, "No." 609 00:31:49,536 --> 00:31:51,037 And Juanita asked, "Why not?" 610 00:31:51,121 --> 00:31:54,457 And, "You let Ricky," our brother, "go last-- spend the night last night." 611 00:31:54,541 --> 00:31:58,545 And I said, "That sounds sexist. You guys should picket her." 612 00:31:58,628 --> 00:32:01,548 So they all picked up sticks, and they're going around my mom's car, 613 00:32:01,631 --> 00:32:03,133 and they're not letting her leave. 614 00:32:03,925 --> 00:32:06,303 They're going around the car, saying, "Sexist. Sexist." 615 00:32:06,386 --> 00:32:09,514 And Camila, who was little at that time-- she was probably five or six-- 616 00:32:09,598 --> 00:32:13,351 she's going around the car, "Sexy. Sexy. Sexy." 617 00:32:14,269 --> 00:32:16,688 I love that. Activism didn't stop at home. 618 00:32:17,898 --> 00:32:21,109 -We don't have any more. -Smelling like tamales. 619 00:32:22,152 --> 00:32:24,487 This was such a great way to see you again, 620 00:32:24,571 --> 00:32:25,739 with your daughters. 621 00:32:25,822 --> 00:32:27,240 And I have to ask you, Dolores, 622 00:32:27,324 --> 00:32:31,328 how on earth you managed leading the movement 623 00:32:31,411 --> 00:32:33,330 plus raising your children. 624 00:32:33,413 --> 00:32:36,750 Well, like, Juanita, she wouldn't eat if I left her, 625 00:32:36,833 --> 00:32:39,836 so I had to actually take her to negotiations with me. 626 00:32:40,337 --> 00:32:42,964 And then I had to depend on my older daughters, 627 00:32:43,048 --> 00:32:45,175 who helped a lot with the younger children. 628 00:32:45,967 --> 00:32:49,429 Like, for us, it was so hard having her gone so much. 629 00:32:49,512 --> 00:32:51,932 Do you feel like you went through that too? 630 00:32:52,015 --> 00:32:56,478 I remember having terrible nightmares as a kid that something had happened to them. 631 00:32:56,561 --> 00:32:58,355 Which I think is partly why 632 00:32:58,438 --> 00:33:01,650 they worked so hard to never be gone at the same time. 633 00:33:01,733 --> 00:33:03,777 I didn't have any siblings. 634 00:33:03,860 --> 00:33:05,987 I have no cousins that are my generation. 635 00:33:06,071 --> 00:33:09,074 So I had no one that I grew up with. 636 00:33:09,157 --> 00:33:12,702 So I had a very different experience than all of you. 637 00:33:12,786 --> 00:33:14,913 You know, my mom pretty much was a single mother, 638 00:33:14,996 --> 00:33:17,582 you know, at the time when she really started organizing. 639 00:33:17,666 --> 00:33:20,001 And, you know, we'd hang out at the community meetings 640 00:33:20,085 --> 00:33:21,753 that the farm workers would have. 641 00:33:22,254 --> 00:33:27,467 How do you explain who Dolores Huerta is to your kids and your grandkids? 642 00:33:27,551 --> 00:33:30,804 I always try to share my childhood experiences, 643 00:33:30,887 --> 00:33:32,847 which are sometimes not so positive. 644 00:33:32,931 --> 00:33:35,183 You know, I was very visual with them about everything 645 00:33:35,267 --> 00:33:38,353 so that they understood what Grandma was doing 646 00:33:38,436 --> 00:33:40,105 and why Grandma was gone. 647 00:33:40,188 --> 00:33:42,315 Like the way my mother did, you know, with us, 648 00:33:42,399 --> 00:33:46,278 you know, taking us to the picket lines and talking to us about what the issue was 649 00:33:46,361 --> 00:33:47,445 and what's going on-- 650 00:33:47,529 --> 00:33:49,197 That's how I taught my children. 651 00:33:49,281 --> 00:33:52,367 I think that most of our kids too have gone into public service 652 00:33:52,450 --> 00:33:53,451 in one way or another. 653 00:33:53,535 --> 00:33:56,746 They understand how important it is to continue the work. 654 00:33:56,830 --> 00:33:58,498 You can't just be comfortable and say, 655 00:33:58,582 --> 00:34:00,959 "Okay, well, I've done this. We're done now." 656 00:34:01,042 --> 00:34:04,921 I tell them the great stories of people that took care of us. The funny stories. 657 00:34:05,005 --> 00:34:08,383 Like one time, they slashed my mom's tires and she still made us go to school. 658 00:34:08,465 --> 00:34:10,802 We thought we weren't gonna have to go to school. She-- 659 00:34:10,885 --> 00:34:13,680 You're like, "Slash tire day instead of snow day." 660 00:34:13,762 --> 00:34:14,972 Then your mom's like, "Nope." 661 00:34:15,056 --> 00:34:17,309 -Yeah. "You're going." -"You're going to school." 662 00:34:18,184 --> 00:34:20,854 Delano has shown what can be done. 663 00:34:20,936 --> 00:34:23,565 And the workers know that they are no longer alone. 664 00:34:25,317 --> 00:34:27,777 I think a lot of people also wouldn't know 665 00:34:27,861 --> 00:34:30,030 you got arrested often. 666 00:34:30,947 --> 00:34:32,365 And you got beaten up. 667 00:34:33,157 --> 00:34:36,202 There's a price to be paid. Isn't there? 668 00:34:36,286 --> 00:34:37,287 During the '60s, 669 00:34:37,370 --> 00:34:39,581 there was a book called A Yaqui Way of Knowledge. 670 00:34:39,664 --> 00:34:42,208 But there was one phrase in there that I always remember. 671 00:34:42,291 --> 00:34:45,336 "When you decide to become a warrior for justice, 672 00:34:45,420 --> 00:34:49,298 you can expect you're gonna have a lot of arrows slung at you." 673 00:34:56,514 --> 00:34:59,559 I had the privilege of receiving one of the eagle feathers 674 00:34:59,643 --> 00:35:03,438 that was bestowed on me at Cesar Chavez's gravesite. 675 00:35:03,521 --> 00:35:06,358 And along with the spirit of the eagle, 676 00:35:06,441 --> 00:35:09,986 the sage carries our prayers up to the creator. 677 00:35:11,196 --> 00:35:15,408 We pray that everybody leave here today with the same energy 678 00:35:15,492 --> 00:35:19,329 to continue doing the good work that we're all doing for the community. 679 00:35:22,040 --> 00:35:24,626 How do you get people to understand 680 00:35:24,709 --> 00:35:29,297 that they can do something to change what they don't think is right 681 00:35:29,381 --> 00:35:30,840 or that is not working for them? 682 00:35:30,924 --> 00:35:32,551 When you organize people, 683 00:35:32,634 --> 00:35:36,096 you have to make them understand that they have to take leadership. 684 00:35:36,179 --> 00:35:37,180 They have to do the work, 685 00:35:37,264 --> 00:35:39,391 and they have to understand that if they don't do it, 686 00:35:39,474 --> 00:35:40,475 it's not gonna happen. 687 00:35:40,559 --> 00:35:43,228 I just like to say that everybody can be an activist. 688 00:35:43,311 --> 00:35:46,231 Yeah. Well, you've raised all your kids to be activists. 689 00:35:46,314 --> 00:35:47,315 I mean, it's amazing. 690 00:35:47,899 --> 00:35:50,360 The family that pickets together stays together. 691 00:35:52,362 --> 00:35:53,363 Here they come. 692 00:35:56,032 --> 00:35:57,242 Hi, everybody. 693 00:35:57,325 --> 00:35:58,410 Hi. 694 00:36:00,787 --> 00:36:01,997 Salud. 695 00:36:02,080 --> 00:36:03,915 Cheers! 696 00:36:08,295 --> 00:36:09,713 I feel so blessed 697 00:36:09,796 --> 00:36:12,674 that I could have a mother who has such an impact. 698 00:36:13,466 --> 00:36:15,385 And I think that we've all passed it along. 699 00:36:16,136 --> 00:36:19,222 That's what's fantastic, you know? We just continue it. Keep it going. 700 00:36:19,306 --> 00:36:20,640 Don't let it go away. 701 00:36:22,058 --> 00:36:27,898 I think being a good mother is, first and foremost, always about love. 702 00:36:29,232 --> 00:36:32,277 You are there to help them become the best version of themselves 703 00:36:32,360 --> 00:36:35,155 and let your children know that you're always in it together. 704 00:36:43,538 --> 00:36:48,501 The only real significant thing is feeling that the family that we're creating, 705 00:36:48,585 --> 00:36:52,172 at the end of the day, had that connection and that love. 706 00:36:59,971 --> 00:37:02,057 This is family. We are a family. 707 00:37:02,140 --> 00:37:05,852 I may be a different kind of auntie, but I'm still an auntie. 708 00:37:09,147 --> 00:37:11,066 You know, I think, for my mother, 709 00:37:11,149 --> 00:37:14,861 at the core of everything she taught me was 710 00:37:14,945 --> 00:37:17,864 that I was the only person who would ever be me. 711 00:37:18,406 --> 00:37:21,534 And what was I going to do to make the most out of it? 712 00:37:33,213 --> 00:37:36,591 It's a bond that, if you can make it right, 713 00:37:37,175 --> 00:37:38,802 you've got everything. 714 00:37:44,057 --> 00:37:45,600 Love you, so much.