1
00:00:06,923 --> 00:00:08,363
Wahey!
ALL: Wahey!
2
00:00:08,363 --> 00:00:11,523
Oh, my God!
Oh-ho, that's fantastic!
3
00:00:15,483 --> 00:00:16,763
Ah...
4
00:00:18,483 --> 00:00:20,563
Wow.
5
00:00:20,563 --> 00:00:22,123
It's so peaceful, isn't it?
6
00:00:22,123 --> 00:00:25,403
Argh! Oh, stupid canvas prick!
7
00:00:25,403 --> 00:00:28,043
HE GROANS
8
00:00:28,043 --> 00:00:30,563
Why are all these poles
different sizes?!
9
00:00:30,563 --> 00:00:32,843
What's the matter, Dad?
Can't get it up?
10
00:00:32,843 --> 00:00:35,243
SHE CLEARS THROAT
Mm...
11
00:00:35,243 --> 00:00:37,243
Oh, my God, that was a joke.
12
00:00:37,243 --> 00:00:39,203
Really wish I hadn't said that.
13
00:00:39,203 --> 00:00:41,523
Here we go, then, Paul.
14
00:00:41,523 --> 00:00:42,923
Look at this.
15
00:00:44,323 --> 00:00:46,363
Woo!
16
00:00:46,363 --> 00:00:48,323
I mean, that is a lot easier, Dad.
17
00:00:48,323 --> 00:00:50,723
That's the two-second tent
for ya!
18
00:00:50,723 --> 00:00:52,763
Told you you should've got one.
19
00:00:52,763 --> 00:00:56,323
Yeah, Dad's old one's just fine, OK?
It's a classic, if anything.
20
00:00:56,323 --> 00:00:58,523
Right, come on everyone,
shake a leg.
21
00:00:58,523 --> 00:01:01,203
Uh, we need to hit Falkirk, so...
22
00:01:01,203 --> 00:01:02,803
Yeah, OK,
I'll be ready in a minute.
23
00:01:02,803 --> 00:01:05,323
How are the toilets, Robin?
Fine, before I came along.
24
00:01:05,323 --> 00:01:06,523
Urgh...
25
00:01:06,523 --> 00:01:09,523
No bog roll, though. Oh, no.
Mm. What did you do?
26
00:01:09,523 --> 00:01:12,243
Well, luckily, I had some Panini
football stickers in my coat,
27
00:01:12,243 --> 00:01:15,923
so I've just been besmirching the
faces of the current Chelsea squad.
28
00:01:15,923 --> 00:01:17,443
I quite enjoyed it, actually.
29
00:01:17,443 --> 00:01:18,763
Cool...
30
00:01:18,763 --> 00:01:22,243
Now, can everyone look out
for a capercaillie?
31
00:01:22,243 --> 00:01:23,843
A cap of what?
32
00:01:23,843 --> 00:01:28,723
Capercaillie. It's like a big,
black, Scottish type of turkey.
33
00:01:28,723 --> 00:01:30,803
No, we shan't be doing that.
34
00:01:30,803 --> 00:01:32,683
This is not a turkey-watching
holiday.
35
00:01:32,683 --> 00:01:34,723
If you want to go on one of those,
I suggest you book
36
00:01:34,723 --> 00:01:36,843
a mini-break at Bernard Matthews'
factory farm.
37
00:01:36,843 --> 00:01:38,363
Rach. Um...
38
00:01:38,363 --> 00:01:40,363
SAM: Well, I can set
my wildlife camera, Granny,
39
00:01:40,363 --> 00:01:41,603
if you want, while we're out.
40
00:01:41,603 --> 00:01:44,883
Aw, thank you, Sammy, love.
That'd be lovely.
41
00:01:44,883 --> 00:01:48,203
Rach? Mm...
We... We really need to...
42
00:01:49,443 --> 00:01:52,683
Yes, OK. Come on, everyone,
let's go to...
43
00:01:52,683 --> 00:01:53,963
Falkirk.
Falkirk!
44
00:01:53,963 --> 00:01:55,843
Argh! Oh, Ugh!
45
00:02:00,243 --> 00:02:04,803
Is there a Millets?
Cos we're going to need a new tent.
46
00:02:04,803 --> 00:02:06,243
Ah, brilliant...
47
00:02:08,163 --> 00:02:10,883
SAM: Go on, Dad. Go on.
48
00:02:10,883 --> 00:02:14,803
Hello and welcome
to my masterpiece.
49
00:02:14,803 --> 00:02:17,323
Yes, look, there it is,
50
00:02:17,323 --> 00:02:21,043
my European holiday
destination calculator,
51
00:02:21,043 --> 00:02:24,523
with colour-coded ribbons here
for each country,
52
00:02:24,523 --> 00:02:29,123
and pros and cons,
so that we can choose where to go.
53
00:02:29,123 --> 00:02:30,683
Here's France, right here.
54
00:02:30,683 --> 00:02:34,083
Under pros, we have vineyards,
of course.
55
00:02:34,083 --> 00:02:38,563
And under cons, we have waiters.
Very rude waiters in France.
56
00:02:38,563 --> 00:02:39,763
Germany.
57
00:02:39,763 --> 00:02:43,603
Under pros here we have crime,
cos it's got a very low crime rate,
58
00:02:43,603 --> 00:02:45,963
and under cons, we've got heat,
because it's not very hot.
59
00:02:45,963 --> 00:02:47,643
DOORBELL RINGS
60
00:02:45,963 --> 00:02:47,643
RACHEL: Doorbell!
61
00:02:47,643 --> 00:02:49,083
That makes sense, doesn't it?
62
00:02:49,083 --> 00:02:51,123
Dad, you've put concentration camps
under pros!
63
00:02:51,123 --> 00:02:54,003
Well, yeah,
as in places to visit, not as in...
64
00:02:54,003 --> 00:02:56,203
I'm not pro-concentration camps,
Sam.
65
00:02:56,203 --> 00:02:58,203
Doorbell! One of you!
I'll get it.
66
00:02:58,203 --> 00:02:59,763
I'll cross it out,
I'll cross it out.
67
00:03:01,323 --> 00:03:03,203
There's L plates on the car.
68
00:03:03,203 --> 00:03:05,283
Yeah, I know. Hiya, Granny.
69
00:03:05,283 --> 00:03:07,003
And the foxes have been back.
70
00:03:07,003 --> 00:03:08,563
Oh, God! Really?
71
00:03:08,563 --> 00:03:10,283
Oh, yeah. God!
72
00:03:08,563 --> 00:03:10,283
SAM CHUCKLES
73
00:03:10,283 --> 00:03:14,523
Oh, why don't they actually eat any
of it? They're fussier than we are!
74
00:03:14,523 --> 00:03:17,043
Well, maybe they don't like
your cooking either, Rachel.
75
00:03:17,043 --> 00:03:18,323
Yeah!
76
00:03:18,323 --> 00:03:21,163
What..?
Hey, that's great news, Amy.
77
00:03:21,163 --> 00:03:23,003
AMY: Aw, thanks, Granny.
78
00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:25,203
RACHEL: Wha-What's that, sorry?
79
00:03:25,203 --> 00:03:30,323
Well, learning to drive. Showing
a bit of get up and go, finally.
80
00:03:30,323 --> 00:03:32,243
Hiya, Maya, love.
Hiya.
81
00:03:32,243 --> 00:03:33,763
No, I'm not doing that.
82
00:03:33,763 --> 00:03:35,683
No, that's, uh, that's me, actually.
83
00:03:35,683 --> 00:03:37,523
Yeah, Amy can hardly get up,
let alone go.
84
00:03:37,523 --> 00:03:40,483
AMY LAUGHS SARCASTICALLY
You? You're learning to drive?
85
00:03:40,483 --> 00:03:41,843
Yes.
86
00:03:41,843 --> 00:03:43,803
Well, I thought you'd given that up
87
00:03:43,803 --> 00:03:46,283
after you hit that cyclist in
the late '90s.
88
00:03:46,283 --> 00:03:47,643
Oh, my God, did you?
89
00:03:47,643 --> 00:03:49,563
No, no, not with the car.
90
00:03:49,563 --> 00:03:51,883
No, with my hand.
91
00:03:51,883 --> 00:03:53,483
An open fist!
92
00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:55,643
We had an argument about right
of way,
93
00:03:55,643 --> 00:03:59,643
and, you know, I just...I just
get very tense at the wheel.
94
00:03:59,643 --> 00:04:02,443
Tense? Tense? It's like being
in a car with Nicolas Cage.
95
00:04:02,443 --> 00:04:04,723
I'm not taking you out again,
I can't face it.
96
00:04:04,723 --> 00:04:06,563
Well, what's brought this on,
anyway?
97
00:04:06,563 --> 00:04:09,603
OK, right. Well, um...
98
00:04:06,563 --> 00:04:09,603
HE CHUCKLES
99
00:04:09,603 --> 00:04:14,803
..brace yourself because...I have
decided to train...
100
00:04:14,803 --> 00:04:16,323
..to be a policeman.
101
00:04:17,603 --> 00:04:19,243
Oh, wow!
That's my big news.
102
00:04:19,243 --> 00:04:22,883
Oh, Paul!
Isn't it fantastic? Aw, bless.
103
00:04:22,883 --> 00:04:24,883
After the undercover operation
with Robin,
104
00:04:24,883 --> 00:04:28,083
you know,
I just realised...I can do it.
105
00:04:28,083 --> 00:04:31,243
You know?
But I do need to be able to drive.
106
00:04:31,243 --> 00:04:35,323
Oh, you will be
a wonderful policeman, actually.
107
00:04:35,323 --> 00:04:37,243
Aw, why? Why do you think that, Sue?
108
00:04:37,243 --> 00:04:40,083
Well, he's just so...
Racist?
109
00:04:40,083 --> 00:04:43,883
Stop...Stop saying that.
OK? it's genuinely very hurtful.
110
00:04:43,883 --> 00:04:46,043
No, nosey, I was going to say.
111
00:04:46,043 --> 00:04:49,523
And you're quite tough, aren't you?
Mm.
112
00:04:49,523 --> 00:04:51,763
Is he? He cut his thumb on an egg.
113
00:04:51,763 --> 00:04:54,283
An eggshell. It can happen.
114
00:04:54,283 --> 00:04:56,883
Yeah, I've never heard
of that happening, to be honest.
115
00:04:56,883 --> 00:04:58,363
Well, it can happen.
116
00:04:58,363 --> 00:04:59,803
Well, I tell you what, Paul,
117
00:04:59,803 --> 00:05:01,683
I could take you out
in my Peugeot if you want.
118
00:05:01,683 --> 00:05:03,083
It's like driving a golf buggy.
119
00:05:03,083 --> 00:05:05,603
Oh, thanks, Maya, yeah,
that'd be great. Thank you.
120
00:05:05,603 --> 00:05:07,683
And what are you going to do
for money, then, Paul,
121
00:05:07,683 --> 00:05:09,003
when you're in police school?
122
00:05:09,003 --> 00:05:10,403
Oh, you're looking at it, Sue.
123
00:05:10,403 --> 00:05:12,243
The Jessop Family Beast of Burden,
124
00:05:12,243 --> 00:05:15,523
off to do my hateful job while this
talking dressing gown loafs around
125
00:05:15,523 --> 00:05:17,403
dreaming up his next career move.
126
00:05:17,403 --> 00:05:19,643
Well, don't be like that, hon!
HE LAUGHS
127
00:05:19,643 --> 00:05:22,203
No, I'm going to take over Amy's job
at the pub
128
00:05:22,203 --> 00:05:24,323
when she's goes to university. So...
129
00:05:24,323 --> 00:05:26,443
Um, when are you going?
130
00:05:26,443 --> 00:05:29,123
Um...
RACHEL: September.
131
00:05:29,123 --> 00:05:30,563
September. September?
132
00:05:30,563 --> 00:05:31,843
AMY CLEARS THROAT
Yeah.
133
00:05:31,843 --> 00:05:34,363
All right, Sue?
Didn't know you'd come over.
134
00:05:34,363 --> 00:05:37,963
oh, well, I've got people viewing
the house this morning,
135
00:05:37,963 --> 00:05:41,683
and Diane said it'd be better if
I wasn't there for some reason.
136
00:05:41,683 --> 00:05:44,003
Right. Have you been mentioning
the ghost?
137
00:05:44,003 --> 00:05:46,323
I have, yeah.
Right.
138
00:05:46,323 --> 00:05:48,963
So, how are you holding up Robin,
after Cheryl?
139
00:05:48,963 --> 00:05:50,123
Yep, well.
140
00:05:50,123 --> 00:05:52,043
Not still crying in the bath,
I hope?
141
00:05:52,043 --> 00:05:53,563
No, no, don't...
142
00:05:52,043 --> 00:05:53,563
HE LAUGHS
143
00:05:53,563 --> 00:05:55,083
No... I'm-I'm fine.
144
00:05:55,083 --> 00:05:57,723
I'm a new man, Sue. I've, uh...
I've bought a Barbour.
145
00:05:57,723 --> 00:06:00,123
I've had a - you probably can't
tell - full body wax.
146
00:06:00,123 --> 00:06:01,923
Wow, really? Yeah. Even your...?
147
00:06:01,923 --> 00:06:03,603
Yep, both of them, both barrels.
148
00:06:03,603 --> 00:06:05,163
You sort of have to, these days,
149
00:06:05,163 --> 00:06:07,603
if you want to get back into
the dating scene, so...
150
00:06:07,603 --> 00:06:09,083
Are you going to try Tinder, then?
151
00:06:09,083 --> 00:06:11,563
Uh, try it?
I'm going to complete it, mate!
152
00:06:11,563 --> 00:06:13,643
I'm treating Tinder
like it's Pokemon Go -
153
00:06:13,643 --> 00:06:15,203
gotta catch 'em all!
154
00:06:15,203 --> 00:06:18,563
Well, girls, that is, ladies,
that is. Not STDs.
155
00:06:18,563 --> 00:06:20,083
Well, good for you, Robin.
156
00:06:20,083 --> 00:06:22,123
Those French campsites won't know
what's hit them.
157
00:06:22,123 --> 00:06:23,523
Well, this is it.
158
00:06:23,523 --> 00:06:25,763
If the tent's a-rocking,
don't come a-knocking,
159
00:06:25,763 --> 00:06:27,843
cos you might see something
pretty shocking!
160
00:06:27,843 --> 00:06:29,523
LAUGHTER AND GROANS
161
00:06:29,523 --> 00:06:32,403
Yeah, I wouldn't recommend having
sex in a tent, actually, Robin.
162
00:06:32,403 --> 00:06:34,683
Huh? It can get horribly steamy.
Oh!
163
00:06:34,683 --> 00:06:36,683
How would you know?
What?
164
00:06:36,683 --> 00:06:38,043
Huh?
Yeah, apparently.
165
00:06:38,043 --> 00:06:40,403
Oh, don't you worry, sis,
I'll be steaming it up all right.
166
00:06:40,403 --> 00:06:43,483
My tent will be whistling away like
a kettle.
167
00:06:43,483 --> 00:06:45,563
I've bought a new tent, as it goes.
168
00:06:45,563 --> 00:06:46,723
Keep talking.
169
00:06:46,723 --> 00:06:49,523
A two-second tent, it's called.
It's a pop-up.
170
00:06:49,523 --> 00:06:52,963
Now, you should get one, Paul.
It looks absolutely brilliant.
171
00:06:52,963 --> 00:06:55,403
Mum, I'm not sleeping in
a pop-up tent
172
00:06:55,403 --> 00:06:58,963
for the same reason I won't read
a pop-up book. It's facile.
173
00:06:58,963 --> 00:07:01,243
Anyway, we haven't actually decided
on France, have we?
174
00:07:01,243 --> 00:07:03,843
Oh! Yes, actually,
I was going to say, Paolo,
175
00:07:03,843 --> 00:07:06,483
I've thought of another country
to throw in the mix. Oh, right.
176
00:07:06,483 --> 00:07:09,083
Well, I'm not sure there's enough
room on the map for another.
177
00:07:09,083 --> 00:07:11,603
Have you ever heard of
the phrase "Scotland"?
178
00:07:11,603 --> 00:07:12,963
Not really a phrase, is it?
179
00:07:12,963 --> 00:07:15,763
Well, it's really
very beautiful, actually, Amy.
180
00:07:15,763 --> 00:07:19,043
And it's got pros coming out of its
bloody sporran. Right? No!
181
00:07:19,043 --> 00:07:20,963
We're talking, yes, castles...
Yeah.
182
00:07:20,963 --> 00:07:22,363
..whisky distilleries.
183
00:07:22,363 --> 00:07:24,603
Oh, I've always wanted to go
to one of them!
184
00:07:24,603 --> 00:07:26,243
Thank you, Sue. No!
185
00:07:26,243 --> 00:07:28,763
Uh, The Cairngorms. Falkirk!
186
00:07:28,763 --> 00:07:31,683
Which is... I've heard is amazing.
Falkirk?
187
00:07:31,683 --> 00:07:34,243
No, let's go somewhere hot
in actual Europe.
188
00:07:34,243 --> 00:07:35,723
AMY: Definitely.
Yes.
189
00:07:39,403 --> 00:07:41,123
Wow.
190
00:07:41,123 --> 00:07:43,123
Wow? In what way?
191
00:07:43,123 --> 00:07:46,883
Well, it's just amazing, innit?
Yeah. No.
192
00:07:46,883 --> 00:07:51,643
With the bookies there, look, and
the traditional bins, I mean, ah...
193
00:07:51,643 --> 00:07:53,643
Are we actually heading somewhere,
Robin,
194
00:07:53,643 --> 00:07:55,203
or are we just strolling around?
195
00:07:55,203 --> 00:07:59,163
Yeah, yeah, just a bit further up
is all the good stuff, so let's...
196
00:07:59,163 --> 00:08:01,443
Great!
..go up this, up this way.
197
00:08:01,443 --> 00:08:04,003
Wow. Oh, there. And there's
a Royal Bank of Scotland there!
198
00:08:04,003 --> 00:08:05,603
I mean, it's another world,
isn't it?
199
00:08:05,603 --> 00:08:08,163
AMY: We have those in England,
Robin.
200
00:08:08,163 --> 00:08:12,083
PAUL: Where exactly did you hear
about Falkirk being good, Robin?
201
00:08:12,083 --> 00:08:15,203
Just uh... Because it seems quite
normal to me,
202
00:08:15,203 --> 00:08:17,003
as in, similar to Bedford.
203
00:08:17,003 --> 00:08:22,403
Well, no, this is the site of
a battle, so let's go in.
204
00:08:22,403 --> 00:08:24,803
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Come on.
205
00:08:24,803 --> 00:08:27,083
Really?
Oh, God. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
206
00:08:27,083 --> 00:08:30,083
OK. There might be swords inside,
you know?
207
00:08:30,083 --> 00:08:34,083
Just, uh...
208
00:08:34,083 --> 00:08:37,883
What battle was it, sorry?
Uh, one of the Braveheart ones.
209
00:08:37,883 --> 00:08:40,283
Why are we in...? Why are we here?
210
00:08:40,283 --> 00:08:42,603
SAM: Is that Cherry?
What?
211
00:08:42,603 --> 00:08:45,723
Is that...?
Robin, is that your Cherry?
212
00:08:45,723 --> 00:08:48,483
Oh, my God. Are you serious?
213
00:08:50,043 --> 00:08:52,563
Um... Um...
Yeah. Well...
214
00:08:52,563 --> 00:08:54,443
Um...
Robin, we should probably explain.
215
00:08:54,443 --> 00:08:57,283
A pony? No. No way.
216
00:08:57,283 --> 00:08:59,643
What happened to the horse?
217
00:08:59,643 --> 00:09:03,723
If I arrive on a pony, Iain,
I will look enormous!
218
00:09:03,723 --> 00:09:06,003
Oh, my God!
219
00:09:06,003 --> 00:09:08,363
I'll call you back.
220
00:09:08,363 --> 00:09:10,483
Wow, Cherry,
what are the chances of...?
221
00:09:10,483 --> 00:09:12,043
No, Robin, no way.
No? OK.
222
00:09:12,043 --> 00:09:15,643
I cannot deal right now.
I cannot even deal.
223
00:09:15,643 --> 00:09:17,723
What's going on?
I still love you, Chez.
224
00:09:17,723 --> 00:09:20,803
One of you, please,
get him out of here.
225
00:09:20,803 --> 00:09:22,243
No, I love you, Chez.
Go on, go on.
226
00:09:22,243 --> 00:09:23,763
Just wait, wait.
Wait, wait.
227
00:09:23,763 --> 00:09:26,643
I learnt it for you, Chez. I learnt
the Cubana for you, babe. I did.
228
00:09:26,643 --> 00:09:27,763
SAM: Oh, God.
229
00:09:27,763 --> 00:09:30,043
Just wait, just wait, just let me...
And I bought a Barbour.
230
00:09:30,043 --> 00:09:32,043
OK, Rach...
SUE: What?
231
00:09:32,043 --> 00:09:34,403
Yep, OK. one, two, three,
one, two, three.
232
00:09:34,403 --> 00:09:35,763
What's happening?
233
00:09:35,763 --> 00:09:38,003
One, two, three,
one, two, three, one, two, three.
234
00:09:38,003 --> 00:09:40,003
Excuse me.
Well, not now, don't...
235
00:09:40,003 --> 00:09:42,003
Well, that's ridiculous.
236
00:09:42,003 --> 00:09:43,523
SAM: I mean...
237
00:09:45,163 --> 00:09:47,723
Robin...
238
00:09:47,723 --> 00:09:49,643
I still love you, Chez.
239
00:09:49,643 --> 00:09:51,603
Oh, my God.
240
00:09:51,603 --> 00:09:53,563
Please don't marry him.
241
00:09:53,563 --> 00:09:55,403
SUE: Robin...
SAM: Oh, God.
242
00:09:55,403 --> 00:09:57,403
SUE: That's amazing. Look at him.
243
00:09:57,403 --> 00:09:59,243
CHERRY: Robin...
Thank you, Sue.
244
00:09:59,243 --> 00:10:01,843
..you're embarrassing
yourself, and me.
245
00:10:01,843 --> 00:10:04,843
I still love you.
Everyone, really.
246
00:10:04,843 --> 00:10:07,043
He doesn't love you like
I love you.
247
00:10:07,043 --> 00:10:08,923
I would get you a horse.
A horse?
248
00:10:08,923 --> 00:10:10,603
You know I would.
249
00:10:10,603 --> 00:10:12,403
I would.
250
00:10:12,403 --> 00:10:14,483
I would.
251
00:10:14,483 --> 00:10:16,723
I'd get you a horse.
252
00:10:16,723 --> 00:10:18,883
Sorry, can you stop dancing
now, please, that's enough.
253
00:10:18,883 --> 00:10:21,923
That's enough, sorry. Thank you.
I'm still in the middle of it.
Thank you, stop.
254
00:10:21,923 --> 00:10:25,243
And can you stop filming, please.
Don't touch my camera.
255
00:10:25,243 --> 00:10:27,963
RACHEL: Oh, God, not again.
256
00:10:27,963 --> 00:10:30,843
I mean, I could always get
a night-vision wildlife camera,
257
00:10:30,843 --> 00:10:33,203
see how the foxes are actually
getting into the bin.
258
00:10:33,203 --> 00:10:35,043
Yeah, I mean, how would that help?
259
00:10:35,043 --> 00:10:36,963
Well, I don't know, but it would
help me.
260
00:10:36,963 --> 00:10:39,003
I've been wanting
to get one of them for a while.
261
00:10:39,003 --> 00:10:40,843
I just don't understand it,
where is the...?
262
00:10:40,843 --> 00:10:42,603
Amy. Amy.
There's a letter from Swansea.
263
00:10:42,603 --> 00:10:44,763
Amy...
AMY: Yep.
264
00:10:44,763 --> 00:10:46,403
What are you looking for?
Sunglasses.
265
00:10:46,403 --> 00:10:48,003
I'm out driving with Maya,
266
00:10:48,003 --> 00:10:50,563
and I need something
in the event of glare.
267
00:10:50,563 --> 00:10:52,803
Is it, uh, where you're living?
268
00:10:53,843 --> 00:10:56,443
Because if you give me the address,
we can look it up on Street View.
269
00:10:56,443 --> 00:11:00,323
No, it's, um, confirmation that
I've given up my place.
270
00:11:03,963 --> 00:11:08,043
What? That you've...?
What do you mean?
271
00:11:08,043 --> 00:11:10,163
I've given up my place at Swansea.
272
00:11:10,163 --> 00:11:12,283
What?
273
00:11:12,283 --> 00:11:15,803
A couple of months ago,
when Maya and I weren't talking,
274
00:11:15,803 --> 00:11:18,283
I figured I didn't
want to go there any more.
275
00:11:18,283 --> 00:11:20,083
Yeah, yeah, but you and Maya have
sorted it,
276
00:11:20,083 --> 00:11:22,163
so call them, get it back.
Yeah, but I don't want to.
277
00:11:22,163 --> 00:11:24,563
I don't want to just follow Maya
around, I want to do my own thing.
278
00:11:24,563 --> 00:11:27,403
Yeah, but do your own thing
at university,
279
00:11:27,403 --> 00:11:28,763
while you can.
280
00:11:28,763 --> 00:11:32,123
I never got a chance to do that,
Amy. I had to work in a cinema.
281
00:11:32,123 --> 00:11:34,163
Oh, cool!
No, not cool!
282
00:11:34,163 --> 00:11:35,603
This was the early noughties -
283
00:11:35,603 --> 00:11:37,963
there were some EXTREMELY poor films
being made back then.
284
00:11:37,963 --> 00:11:39,523
Well, it's done, Mum, I'm not going.
285
00:11:39,523 --> 00:11:43,163
I had to watch Vanilla Sky 14 times.
It was a nightmare.
286
00:11:43,163 --> 00:11:45,403
MAYA: Paul, are you ready, then?
287
00:11:45,403 --> 00:11:46,763
I'm sorry if you're disappointed.
288
00:11:46,763 --> 00:11:49,163
Yep, ready!
289
00:11:49,163 --> 00:11:51,123
All right! Um...
290
00:11:51,123 --> 00:11:55,323
Rach, remind me, I need to buy
some sunglasses before the holiday.
291
00:11:55,323 --> 00:11:58,283
Uh, no, no, need.
We're going to Scotland.
292
00:11:58,283 --> 00:12:00,363
What? Scotland?
Mm.
293
00:12:00,363 --> 00:12:04,123
But my destination calculator,
that's saying Crete.
294
00:12:04,123 --> 00:12:05,843
I thought you wanted
to go somewhere hot?
295
00:12:05,843 --> 00:12:10,443
No, I did, and then I spoke to Robin
about it, and I changed my mind.
296
00:12:10,443 --> 00:12:12,923
OK, all right. Well,
we are talking about this later,
297
00:12:12,923 --> 00:12:15,763
because Scotland, Schmotland,
frankly!
298
00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:18,963
Sorry.
All good.
299
00:12:18,963 --> 00:12:20,683
SAM: Are you driving into town?
300
00:12:20,683 --> 00:12:22,363
Uh, yeah, can do.
301
00:12:24,923 --> 00:12:27,643
OK, maybe speed up a little bit.
302
00:12:27,643 --> 00:12:30,163
Yeah, it's 20mph
around here, Maya, thank you.
303
00:12:30,163 --> 00:12:33,043
Yeah, I know, but you're
doing...six.
304
00:12:33,043 --> 00:12:36,163
Where's first? It's just...
I can't... It's so far away.
305
00:12:36,163 --> 00:12:37,643
It's a bad design.
It's a bad design.
306
00:12:37,643 --> 00:12:39,563
Let's try an emergency stop.
OK.
307
00:12:39,563 --> 00:12:41,763
OK, when I tap the dashboard, OK?
Yep, yep.
308
00:12:41,763 --> 00:12:43,323
OK...
309
00:12:44,403 --> 00:12:46,083
HORN BEEPS, TYRES SCREECH
310
00:12:47,483 --> 00:12:50,203
Huh?
Why did you honk?
311
00:12:50,203 --> 00:12:53,203
Well, you know, if you if you're
stopping in an emergency, Maya,
312
00:12:53,203 --> 00:12:55,283
it's going to be someone
else's fault,
313
00:12:55,283 --> 00:12:59,323
so it's essential that you honk...
in order to tell them off.
314
00:12:59,323 --> 00:13:01,323
Right, here we go.
That wasn't a bad start, was it?
315
00:13:01,323 --> 00:13:03,403
It was OK. Shush.
316
00:13:01,323 --> 00:13:03,403
ENGINE REVS
317
00:13:03,403 --> 00:13:06,203
On your left, Dad! Huh?!
Stop honking!
318
00:13:06,203 --> 00:13:08,123
Oh, where did he come from?
319
00:13:08,123 --> 00:13:10,043
That's a parked car.
You lunatic!
320
00:13:10,043 --> 00:13:11,523
Is it?
321
00:13:11,523 --> 00:13:13,643
Look, I really think you need
lessons
322
00:13:13,643 --> 00:13:15,563
from a proper instructor, Paul.
323
00:13:15,563 --> 00:13:19,043
I can't afford them, Maya.
Please, I'm sorry.
324
00:13:19,043 --> 00:13:22,723
I'm listening. I'll do everything
you say from now on.
325
00:13:22,723 --> 00:13:24,843
OK, right. Let's do a hill start,
then.
326
00:13:24,843 --> 00:13:26,203
Except that. I can't do them.
327
00:13:27,963 --> 00:13:30,523
OK. OK, then, fine.
Right, good.
328
00:13:30,523 --> 00:13:34,843
Oh, God. Oh, God.
Right, so ease off the brake. Yep.
329
00:13:34,843 --> 00:13:37,443
Yep, bring up the clutch.
Uh-huh.
330
00:13:37,443 --> 00:13:39,963
And revs. Accelerator.
331
00:13:39,963 --> 00:13:41,283
ENGINE REVS, WHEELS SCREECH
332
00:13:42,763 --> 00:13:45,163
No, see, I can't.
I can't do this. I can't.
333
00:13:45,163 --> 00:13:48,723
I can't drive. This is pointless.
334
00:13:48,723 --> 00:13:51,803
PAUL SIGHS
335
00:13:48,723 --> 00:13:51,803
I should just give up.
336
00:13:51,803 --> 00:13:54,603
You know what, I'm just going to
walk to the high street.
337
00:13:54,603 --> 00:13:56,603
Thanks, Sam.
Thanks for the support, buddy.
338
00:13:56,603 --> 00:13:57,843
I'm not risking my life.
339
00:13:59,683 --> 00:14:03,043
No, right, come on, Paul. OK?
Let's try again, yeah?
340
00:14:03,043 --> 00:14:05,563
Engine on.
341
00:14:03,043 --> 00:14:05,563
ENGINE STARTS
342
00:14:05,563 --> 00:14:08,883
Bring up the clutch.
Revs.
343
00:14:08,883 --> 00:14:12,163
No, brake. Brake... Brake!
344
00:14:08,883 --> 00:14:12,163
HORN BEEPS
345
00:14:12,163 --> 00:14:15,403
Paul, stop honking! No, brake! Paul!
346
00:14:15,403 --> 00:14:19,083
Hands on the wheel!
Hands on the wheel! Stop honking!
347
00:14:21,043 --> 00:14:23,683
I mean, why didn't you tell us?
348
00:14:23,683 --> 00:14:25,243
Because you wouldn't have agreed
to it.
349
00:14:25,243 --> 00:14:29,403
So what? You trick us into going to
Scotland, then? Great!
350
00:14:29,403 --> 00:14:31,083
You didn't tell me
you'd quit university
351
00:14:31,083 --> 00:14:33,323
and he didn't tell me he'd given up
learning to drive.
352
00:14:33,323 --> 00:14:35,883
Since when do we tell each other
anything in this family?
353
00:14:37,723 --> 00:14:40,603
So, Cherry's getting married
in Scotland, is she?
354
00:14:40,603 --> 00:14:42,963
Yes, Mum. Keep up!
355
00:14:44,523 --> 00:14:46,003
HE SIGHS
356
00:14:47,443 --> 00:14:51,003
What did you think was going to
happen, Robin? Huh?
357
00:14:52,443 --> 00:14:56,603
I guess I thought I'd do the dance
and then we'd scoop her up,
358
00:14:56,603 --> 00:14:58,403
you know, take her with us.
359
00:14:58,403 --> 00:14:59,563
Graduate style.
360
00:15:01,003 --> 00:15:02,243
I mean, it's genuinely mad.
361
00:15:02,243 --> 00:15:04,163
It's romantic, actually.
362
00:15:04,163 --> 00:15:05,523
You wouldn't understand.
363
00:15:08,523 --> 00:15:10,603
OK, I've got a great idea.
364
00:15:10,603 --> 00:15:13,563
Why don't we all go to a distillery?
Definitely.
365
00:15:13,563 --> 00:15:16,643
Oh, yeah. OK, Mum,
that's a great idea.
366
00:15:16,643 --> 00:15:18,963
You know, let's just take this
heartbroken,
367
00:15:18,963 --> 00:15:23,043
highly addictive blancmange
of a man
368
00:15:23,043 --> 00:15:26,523
to a whisky wholesalers the day
before his ex-girlfriend's wedding.
369
00:15:26,523 --> 00:15:27,803
Yeah, OK!
370
00:15:27,803 --> 00:15:31,363
Well, I for one, need a drink.
Yeah, me too.
371
00:15:33,203 --> 00:15:37,803
Yep.
Go on, pick a tent, quickly.
372
00:15:37,803 --> 00:15:39,763
All right.
373
00:15:39,763 --> 00:15:43,003
Oh, Robin. Oh...
374
00:15:44,323 --> 00:15:46,883
Found anything interesting?
375
00:15:46,883 --> 00:15:50,963
This viaduct was in Harry Potter.
Oh!
376
00:15:50,963 --> 00:15:54,363
You?
Ah, yeah, just that one.
377
00:15:54,363 --> 00:15:57,123
You want to do an historic tour of
the University of Glasgow?
378
00:15:57,123 --> 00:15:59,083
Uh, no, I just...
379
00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:02,243
Well, I thought you might
want to see it while we're here.
380
00:16:02,243 --> 00:16:04,843
Talk to someone about applying.
Don't start this again, Mum.
381
00:16:04,843 --> 00:16:06,683
Just think about it.
I have thought about it.
382
00:16:06,683 --> 00:16:08,443
Think about it a bit more, then.
383
00:16:08,443 --> 00:16:11,283
I don't want you
to end up like me, OK?
384
00:16:11,283 --> 00:16:13,083
AMY SCOFFS
385
00:16:11,283 --> 00:16:13,083
Yeah, and nor do I.
386
00:16:13,083 --> 00:16:15,163
I'm completely with you on that.
387
00:16:15,163 --> 00:16:17,283
If you're not happy
with where you've ended up, Mum,
388
00:16:17,283 --> 00:16:18,643
that's on you.
389
00:16:18,643 --> 00:16:20,243
Don't put that on me.
390
00:16:20,243 --> 00:16:21,483
I'm not...
391
00:16:22,643 --> 00:16:25,163
I'm not... Ugh...
392
00:16:32,483 --> 00:16:34,643
Welcome to Balhousie, everyone!
393
00:16:34,643 --> 00:16:37,203
HE STRAINS
394
00:16:37,203 --> 00:16:40,523
OK. Who's on my four o'clock?
395
00:16:42,923 --> 00:16:47,203
It's then finished in vintage
oloroso sherry casks
396
00:16:47,203 --> 00:16:49,963
from Montilla-Moriles, in Spain.
397
00:16:49,963 --> 00:16:54,483
We like to say it's like
having your throat gently licked.
398
00:16:54,483 --> 00:16:56,003
Blimey!
399
00:16:56,003 --> 00:16:59,763
I mean, that is a ridiculously
short kilt, isn't it?
400
00:16:59,763 --> 00:17:01,843
Looks like Britney Spears.
401
00:17:01,843 --> 00:17:04,243
Sh! No, it doesn't.
I think it really suits him.
402
00:17:04,243 --> 00:17:05,483
Well, of course you do.
403
00:17:05,483 --> 00:17:08,243
I mean, any shorter,
and you'd be able to see his caber.
404
00:17:08,243 --> 00:17:10,923
Anyone like to give it a try?
405
00:17:10,923 --> 00:17:12,403
Yes, please, boss. Over here.
406
00:17:12,403 --> 00:17:16,763
Yeah, just, a dram for this man,
a wee dram.
407
00:17:16,763 --> 00:17:19,443
A wee dram from the big yin, eh?
408
00:17:19,443 --> 00:17:22,083
And can I tempt you ladies?
Ah, yes, you certainly can.
409
00:17:22,083 --> 00:17:24,323
Oh, yeah, lovely.
You certainly can, thank you.
410
00:17:24,323 --> 00:17:26,963
And me, thanks. I'm not a lady,
but I'm also here, thank you.
411
00:17:26,963 --> 00:17:29,323
Thank you, mate, cheers.
412
00:17:29,323 --> 00:17:31,603
Oh... Oh, that's lovely and strong.
413
00:17:31,603 --> 00:17:35,323
Ah, strong but also delicate,
with a really good body.
414
00:17:35,323 --> 00:17:37,963
It has got incredible body, yes.
Well spotted.
415
00:17:37,963 --> 00:17:40,843
Thanks. Uh...?
Uh, Rachel. Rachel.
416
00:17:40,843 --> 00:17:43,003
Not many people pay attention
to body.
417
00:17:43,003 --> 00:17:45,363
Oh, I do.
Yeah, I'm very body conscious.
418
00:17:46,603 --> 00:17:49,883
Urgh! Ah, yuck.
No, that's not for me, that.
419
00:17:49,883 --> 00:17:52,403
Tastes of Listerine, if anything.
420
00:17:52,403 --> 00:17:53,643
I love it. I love it.
421
00:17:53,643 --> 00:17:55,883
OK. This way, then, please.
Urgh!
422
00:17:55,883 --> 00:17:57,203
Follow on, guys.
423
00:17:57,203 --> 00:17:59,963
Can I get a bit... Horrible.
..more in?
424
00:17:59,963 --> 00:18:02,803
What are you doing?
SAM: Sorry, what was that?
425
00:18:02,803 --> 00:18:04,363
Why are you filming everything?
426
00:18:04,363 --> 00:18:08,763
Um, I'm making a documentary about
the holiday and my family.
427
00:18:08,763 --> 00:18:10,243
Why?
428
00:18:10,243 --> 00:18:13,203
I don't know. I guess it stops them
from talking to me.
429
00:18:13,203 --> 00:18:15,723
Right. Where are you staying?
430
00:18:15,723 --> 00:18:18,883
In the, uh, Cairngl... Cairnglen...
431
00:18:18,883 --> 00:18:20,963
Cairngorms? Cairngorms.
Yeah, so are we.
432
00:18:20,963 --> 00:18:22,803
Oh, right, well we should, uh...
433
00:18:22,803 --> 00:18:25,443
Are you on Insta or anything?
No, I hate all that.
434
00:18:25,443 --> 00:18:28,083
Yeah, me too.
We're in the big yellow camper van.
435
00:18:28,083 --> 00:18:29,403
OK. Look out for us.
436
00:18:29,403 --> 00:18:33,603
Yep. Big yellow camper van.
Will do, thanks. Bye.
437
00:18:33,603 --> 00:18:37,203
Ah... Try... try that one again.
OK.
438
00:18:37,203 --> 00:18:38,723
I like it and I plan to buy it,
439
00:18:38,723 --> 00:18:41,083
I just want to check that it's my
favourite. That's no problem.
440
00:18:41,083 --> 00:18:42,563
SUE COUGHS
441
00:18:42,563 --> 00:18:45,323
Bloody hell!
You could power a tanker with that.
442
00:18:45,323 --> 00:18:47,723
It is a nudge stronger, yes.
443
00:18:47,723 --> 00:18:53,603
And currently, at the mightily
discounted price of 129.99.
444
00:18:53,603 --> 00:18:56,003
OK, OK.
Yeah, we can't afford that.
445
00:18:56,003 --> 00:18:58,843
Yeah, well, it's my money, isn't it?
So it's up to me.
446
00:18:58,843 --> 00:19:00,363
But, yeah, that is a bit much.
447
00:19:00,363 --> 00:19:04,803
Or there's our
signature Kilchuaine 10.
448
00:19:04,803 --> 00:19:05,963
Oh, wow.
449
00:19:05,963 --> 00:19:11,043
This one is flirty and fun,
with a playful peppery,
450
00:19:11,043 --> 00:19:14,243
peaty edge that dances over
your tongue.
451
00:19:14,243 --> 00:19:18,203
Peaty? Like peat? As in the soil?
452
00:19:18,203 --> 00:19:20,763
Uh, I see you've found
the shortbreads, then, Paul.
453
00:19:20,763 --> 00:19:22,163
Yeah. Is there...
454
00:19:22,163 --> 00:19:25,483
Is there any compost you're getting
there or hints of manure?
455
00:19:25,483 --> 00:19:28,003
Ah, sorry about him.
He mistakenly thinks he's funny.
456
00:19:28,003 --> 00:19:29,483
Yeah. What?
457
00:19:31,923 --> 00:19:35,003
Mugs. The pair of you. Mugs.
458
00:19:35,003 --> 00:19:36,603
Uh... I'm sorry?
459
00:19:36,603 --> 00:19:40,483
Well, that bloody
porridge oats man... Oh, God...
460
00:19:40,483 --> 00:19:43,443
..flashes a bit of thigh and you two
get all weak at the knickers
461
00:19:43,443 --> 00:19:45,163
and get your credit cards out.
462
00:19:45,163 --> 00:19:47,203
That is not actually true.
463
00:19:47,203 --> 00:19:51,963
I really loved the
Kil...Kilch-wain 10.
464
00:19:51,963 --> 00:19:53,923
And it was actually excellent value.
465
00:19:53,923 --> 00:19:57,523
It was. Considering all the free
samples he gave us.
466
00:19:57,523 --> 00:19:59,923
Yeah, that's a point.
Are you all right to drive, Mum?
467
00:19:59,923 --> 00:20:03,523
Of course. As long as we go slowly.
What? What does that mean?
468
00:20:03,523 --> 00:20:06,203
It means... It means I'm fine.
469
00:20:06,203 --> 00:20:09,403
Are you over the limit?
No, stop it, I'm not, no.
470
00:20:09,403 --> 00:20:11,363
Come on then, Sue.
Crack your one open then.
471
00:20:11,363 --> 00:20:14,203
What? No! Get off!
Go on. I only want a dram.
472
00:20:14,203 --> 00:20:15,523
Hands off! No, you're not!
473
00:20:15,523 --> 00:20:17,963
Can you calm down
in the back, please?
474
00:20:17,963 --> 00:20:20,483
Just tell her to share!
Tell her to share, then!
475
00:20:20,483 --> 00:20:21,643
TYRES SCREECH, THEY SCREAM
476
00:20:21,643 --> 00:20:23,163
Sorry, sorry. Oh, my God!
Be careful.
477
00:20:23,163 --> 00:20:25,283
Can you just please be quiet
in the back, please?
478
00:20:25,283 --> 00:20:27,003
These roads are disgustingly windy.
479
00:20:28,243 --> 00:20:30,723
Sorry.
480
00:20:28,243 --> 00:20:30,723
SIREN WAILS
481
00:20:30,723 --> 00:20:32,003
What? Oh.
482
00:20:32,003 --> 00:20:34,603
Po-po, Rach.
I think he wants you to pull over.
483
00:20:34,603 --> 00:20:37,403
I know, I know that.
I know how to drive, remember.
484
00:20:37,403 --> 00:20:39,643
Cool. Oh, great.
Yeah.
485
00:20:39,643 --> 00:20:41,603
OK, we have to swap.
What? Swap?
486
00:20:41,603 --> 00:20:44,083
If he breathalyses me,
we're in quite a lot of trouble.
487
00:20:44,083 --> 00:20:46,403
What? I thought you said
you weren't over the limit?!
488
00:20:46,403 --> 00:20:47,843
Yes. Well, I lied!
489
00:20:47,843 --> 00:20:49,923
That hot Scot shit gave me
about 40 glasses of whisky,
490
00:20:49,923 --> 00:20:52,723
so huddle up everyone,
so he doesn't see. Oh, no.
491
00:20:52,723 --> 00:20:55,003
Huddle up. Huddle up together,
please so he can't see.
492
00:20:55,003 --> 00:20:58,203
Take the whisky, take the whisky.
Take the shortbread.
493
00:20:58,203 --> 00:20:59,723
Oh... Are you OK? Yeah.
494
00:20:59,723 --> 00:21:01,723
They're getting out.
Paolo, they're getting out.
495
00:21:01,723 --> 00:21:03,123
OK, OK, OK. OK. He's coming!
496
00:21:04,363 --> 00:21:06,563
Argh!
497
00:21:06,563 --> 00:21:08,163
Seat belt on.
I mean, this is ridiculous.
498
00:21:08,163 --> 00:21:10,643
Seat belt.
Absolutely ridiculous.
499
00:21:10,643 --> 00:21:12,283
And calm, cool. Cool, cool, cool.
500
00:21:14,163 --> 00:21:16,803
KNOCK ON WINDOW, WINDOW LOWERS
501
00:21:16,803 --> 00:21:19,083
Good evening, officer.
How can I help?
502
00:21:19,083 --> 00:21:20,923
You were weaving all over the road.
503
00:21:20,923 --> 00:21:24,403
Yes. Yes, I was. Um, on purpose,
504
00:21:24,403 --> 00:21:27,443
because I was practising
evasive manoeuvres,
505
00:21:27,443 --> 00:21:29,083
as I know you guys have to.
506
00:21:29,083 --> 00:21:31,243
I was, uh, thinking of training to
be a policeman myself.
507
00:21:31,243 --> 00:21:34,923
Have you been drinking, sir?
No, not a sausage, sir.
508
00:21:34,923 --> 00:21:36,723
Licence, please.
509
00:21:36,723 --> 00:21:40,563
Yeah. Um, babe,
have you got my wallet there?
510
00:21:40,563 --> 00:21:42,803
Because uh...
511
00:21:42,803 --> 00:21:45,723
Oh, you know what? I...
512
00:21:45,723 --> 00:21:50,243
Oh... I think I've left it in the
hotel. I am so sorry. Honestly.
513
00:21:50,243 --> 00:21:51,963
Step out of the car, please.
514
00:21:51,963 --> 00:21:54,763
Yep. That's easily done.
515
00:22:00,163 --> 00:22:01,883
Thank you.
516
00:22:04,843 --> 00:22:07,203
Oh, cool, he's got one of them.
517
00:22:07,203 --> 00:22:09,923
I mean, I can't believe
he didn't even question
518
00:22:09,923 --> 00:22:11,363
that Dad was the driver.
519
00:22:11,363 --> 00:22:14,563
Thank God for sexism!
Finally, there's an upside.
520
00:22:14,563 --> 00:22:15,883
Yep.
521
00:22:19,483 --> 00:22:21,843
He's coming back, he's coming back.
522
00:22:24,363 --> 00:22:26,563
Hey. Hiya.
523
00:22:27,843 --> 00:22:30,843
Well, that all seems fine.
524
00:22:30,843 --> 00:22:32,123
Thank you, officer!
525
00:22:32,123 --> 00:22:34,963
Brilliant, thank you so much.
Honestly, thank you so much, really.
526
00:22:34,963 --> 00:22:37,403
Be careful driving in
these mountain roads, OK?
527
00:22:37,403 --> 00:22:38,963
Yes, will do. And you.
528
00:22:40,123 --> 00:22:41,563
Off you go, then.
529
00:22:41,563 --> 00:22:44,043
OK, thank you. Thank you so much.
Thanks again. Cheers.
530
00:22:46,963 --> 00:22:50,843
Why is he still there?
Is he still there? Yeah.
531
00:22:52,283 --> 00:22:54,283
What is it?
532
00:22:54,283 --> 00:22:55,723
It's a hill start.
533
00:22:55,723 --> 00:22:57,363
Yeah. You can do that, can't you?
534
00:22:57,363 --> 00:23:00,843
Well, I haven't been able to yet,
no. Oh...
535
00:23:00,843 --> 00:23:05,523
And that's without a terrifyingly
dour Scottish policeman watching.
536
00:23:05,523 --> 00:23:07,483
SAM: They're still there, Dad.
537
00:23:07,483 --> 00:23:09,883
Oh, come on, you can do it.
538
00:23:09,883 --> 00:23:11,283
I believe in you.
539
00:23:13,883 --> 00:23:17,443
OK. OK. Yeah, yeah. OK.
Revs, revs.
540
00:23:19,043 --> 00:23:21,763
Mirror. Yeah. Clutch.
541
00:23:21,763 --> 00:23:24,763
Mirror. The biting point.
Yep.
542
00:23:24,763 --> 00:23:26,723
I've got the handbrake.
OK. Off we go.
543
00:23:26,723 --> 00:23:29,403
ENGINE REVS
544
00:23:29,403 --> 00:23:31,603
Ah...
545
00:23:31,603 --> 00:23:33,523
Yes! Yes! You've done it!
546
00:23:33,523 --> 00:23:35,003
Yes, Dad!
547
00:23:35,003 --> 00:23:37,283
CHEERING
548
00:23:37,283 --> 00:23:38,963
Oh, I'm driving!
549
00:23:38,963 --> 00:23:40,763
I'm a driver!
550
00:23:40,763 --> 00:23:43,963
Oh, you're my hero.
You are my hero.
551
00:23:46,043 --> 00:23:49,043
How's the head this morning, then,
Robin?
552
00:23:49,043 --> 00:23:51,523
Throbbing a bit, yeah.
553
00:23:51,523 --> 00:23:53,203
Urgh...
554
00:23:53,203 --> 00:23:57,403
Not exactly two seconds
to put it away again, is it? No.
555
00:23:57,403 --> 00:23:59,803
They don't show you that on
the YouTube video.
556
00:23:59,803 --> 00:24:01,683
I know, it's a bugger.
557
00:24:01,683 --> 00:24:03,963
Can you stop it?
558
00:24:01,683 --> 00:24:03,963
SHE LAUGHS
559
00:24:03,963 --> 00:24:06,563
HE PLAYFULLY CHOMPS
560
00:24:06,563 --> 00:24:10,283
OK, come on, everyone. Let's, um...
Let's get packed up, yeah? Yep.
561
00:24:10,283 --> 00:24:12,803
Woo!
Yeah, we're trying.
562
00:24:12,803 --> 00:24:15,643
Amy, wake up.
Let's go, let's go, let's go.
563
00:24:15,643 --> 00:24:19,283
Come on, darling.
Ooh, yeah!
564
00:24:19,283 --> 00:24:22,283
We're going to have to, um...
565
00:24:22,283 --> 00:24:24,963
..take my tent back like this,
I'm afraid.
566
00:24:24,963 --> 00:24:26,443
What do you mean?
Well, no, just...
567
00:24:26,443 --> 00:24:28,523
Well, it won't pop down.
568
00:24:28,523 --> 00:24:32,283
So, we might have to, uh, strap it
to the roof of the car.
569
00:24:32,283 --> 00:24:34,243
Oh, God. What, like a snail?
570
00:24:34,243 --> 00:24:35,723
I can get it. I can get it, Sue.
571
00:24:35,723 --> 00:24:38,403
I just need to sort of bend
it into submission.
572
00:24:38,403 --> 00:24:40,003
Amy?
573
00:24:40,003 --> 00:24:44,443
Oh, you're all... Well done!
Morning.
574
00:24:44,443 --> 00:24:49,683
Yeah. Um, can you take me
to Aberdeen ferry terminal, please?
575
00:24:49,683 --> 00:24:51,603
Why?
576
00:24:51,603 --> 00:24:54,483
I'm going to Norway.
What?
577
00:24:54,483 --> 00:24:55,923
We're going to the Cairngorms.
578
00:24:55,923 --> 00:25:00,403
Yeah, I know, but there are ferries
to Norway, and...I want to go.
579
00:25:02,723 --> 00:25:04,283
For how long?
580
00:25:04,283 --> 00:25:07,283
Don't know. A few weeks. Or months.
581
00:25:08,283 --> 00:25:10,443
I've got some money saved up from
the pub,
582
00:25:10,443 --> 00:25:12,403
so...I'll just see what happens.
583
00:25:12,403 --> 00:25:15,683
Amy, you...you haven't
thought this through.
584
00:25:15,683 --> 00:25:18,483
You can't just go to Norway on
a whim. OK.
585
00:25:20,043 --> 00:25:23,123
OK? OK. We're OK with that, are we?
586
00:25:23,123 --> 00:25:26,003
If that's what you want to do,
of course we'll drop you off.
587
00:25:26,003 --> 00:25:27,523
Thank you.
588
00:25:28,803 --> 00:25:30,043
ROBIN: Right, bag.
589
00:25:30,043 --> 00:25:32,363
You won't get it in there, Robin.
590
00:25:32,363 --> 00:25:35,283
That's like trying to put
a condom on a Christmas tree.
591
00:25:36,923 --> 00:25:39,603
Just try it. At least try it.
No.
592
00:25:39,603 --> 00:25:42,163
Now, don't let go of that, Robin.
I've got him, Sue.
593
00:25:42,163 --> 00:25:43,443
Love you.
594
00:25:43,443 --> 00:25:45,003
I've got him.
595
00:25:45,003 --> 00:25:47,683
Hey, at least I can take some of
your shifts at the pub now, Amy.
596
00:25:47,683 --> 00:25:50,523
That's a plus.
Sure, Dad, knock yourself out.
597
00:25:50,523 --> 00:25:53,123
Here you go, look.
598
00:25:53,123 --> 00:25:54,563
What's this, Bilbo?
599
00:25:54,563 --> 00:25:56,443
My wildlife camera caught something
last night.
600
00:25:56,443 --> 00:25:58,323
Oh! Hopefully my capercaillie.
601
00:26:00,603 --> 00:26:02,643
What, um...? When...?
602
00:26:02,643 --> 00:26:05,643
What were you filming last night,
Sam?
603
00:26:05,643 --> 00:26:07,443
Uh, well, it's motion activated,
604
00:26:07,443 --> 00:26:09,243
so it kind of just turns on
on its own.
605
00:26:09,243 --> 00:26:12,283
There, look. Oh, yeah.
Holy shit! Are those birds?
606
00:26:12,283 --> 00:26:15,243
Don't be silly. They're massive.
That's two people.
607
00:26:15,243 --> 00:26:17,563
Turn it off, please.
Don't watch that, Sam.
608
00:26:17,563 --> 00:26:19,763
Please turn it off. Sam...
I'll turn it up.
609
00:26:19,763 --> 00:26:21,883
No, Amy, don't turn it up.
Don't turn it up - turn it off!
610
00:26:21,883 --> 00:26:24,123
Amy, seriously...! Turn it off!
VIBRATION
611
00:26:24,123 --> 00:26:26,123
Listen to your mother, please.
No, no, no, no!
612
00:26:26,123 --> 00:26:28,723
That's disgusting. What's that
buzzing? Is that on the video?
613
00:26:28,723 --> 00:26:31,323
Just close your eyes. Oh, no,
it's my phone. Sorry, it's my phone.
614
00:26:31,323 --> 00:26:32,883
Could you fish it out of my pocket?
615
00:26:32,883 --> 00:26:35,043
Yeah, well, how do you think you
were made?
616
00:26:35,043 --> 00:26:36,243
GROANS ON VIDEO
617
00:26:36,243 --> 00:26:40,203
Oh, my Godfathers! You dirty ducks!
That's really disgusting.
618
00:26:40,203 --> 00:26:41,923
Completely natural,
we love each other!
619
00:26:41,923 --> 00:26:43,043
Oh, don't make it worse!
620
00:26:43,043 --> 00:26:45,043
Robin, it's Cherry.
621
00:26:45,043 --> 00:26:46,763
Oh, what? Got to get this!
622
00:26:46,763 --> 00:26:49,203
Don't...!
623
00:26:46,763 --> 00:26:49,203
THEY SCREAM
624
00:26:49,203 --> 00:26:50,643
Cherry!
625
00:26:50,643 --> 00:26:52,283
Yeah, of course.
626
00:26:52,283 --> 00:26:54,763
I mean, yeah.
627
00:26:54,763 --> 00:26:56,003
Oh, me too.
628
00:26:56,003 --> 00:26:58,123
Tie it up properly, Mum, there.
Yeah, I am.
629
00:26:58,123 --> 00:26:59,883
We've got to go on the motorway
with this.
630
00:26:59,883 --> 00:27:01,283
It will be fine.
631
00:27:01,283 --> 00:27:03,243
I'm nervous about it, to be honest.
632
00:27:03,243 --> 00:27:05,443
So, um, I've been thinking...
633
00:27:10,283 --> 00:27:12,043
In a good way?
634
00:27:12,043 --> 00:27:14,043
Uh, I think I want to go
to university.
635
00:27:16,843 --> 00:27:20,003
Sorry, I know that's mad,
in some ways,
636
00:27:20,003 --> 00:27:24,163
I mean, I'd be part time,
you know, I'll still work.
637
00:27:24,163 --> 00:27:27,203
I just want to try something else.
638
00:27:27,203 --> 00:27:28,523
I mean, let's face it,
639
00:27:28,523 --> 00:27:31,323
I've not exactly been at
my best this last year, have I?
640
00:27:33,683 --> 00:27:35,163
Of course you have.
641
00:27:37,283 --> 00:27:41,123
Rach...you're the best person
I've ever met.
642
00:27:42,843 --> 00:27:44,563
And I've met Mo Farah.
643
00:27:46,363 --> 00:27:48,323
Whatever you need,
we'll make it work.
644
00:27:52,963 --> 00:27:55,083
Oh, God, get a room.
645
00:27:55,083 --> 00:27:58,563
Actually, no need. You two just go
at it outside these days.
646
00:27:58,563 --> 00:28:00,203
Whoa, sass!
647
00:28:00,203 --> 00:28:02,723
You know, can you go to Norway,
please?
648
00:28:02,723 --> 00:28:05,443
Yeah, I'm trying. The next ferry's
in, like, three hours, so...
649
00:28:05,443 --> 00:28:06,923
Take the shortbread with you, Amy.
650
00:28:06,923 --> 00:28:08,243
SAM: Oh, no way.
651
00:28:11,003 --> 00:28:12,883
You looking for me?
652
00:28:12,883 --> 00:28:16,203
Oh, I was...
I was hoping I'd bump into you.
653
00:28:16,203 --> 00:28:17,883
Yeah. Why?
654
00:28:17,883 --> 00:28:21,403
Um, well, uh...
655
00:28:21,403 --> 00:28:24,203
You never told me your name
and I wondered what it was.
656
00:28:24,203 --> 00:28:25,843
Stop filming me, then.
657
00:28:25,843 --> 00:28:27,883
HE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY
658
00:28:25,843 --> 00:28:27,883
What do you mean?
659
00:28:27,883 --> 00:28:30,243
Stop filming me, and I'll tell you.
660
00:28:30,243 --> 00:28:34,683
Um, no, I can't.
It's a documentary project,
661
00:28:34,683 --> 00:28:36,923
to sort of film everything.
It's what I...
662
00:28:36,923 --> 00:28:39,883
And I'll give you my phone number
if you turn the camera off.
663
00:28:39,883 --> 00:28:42,923
Uh... Well, only...
664
00:28:42,923 --> 00:28:45,323
OK. Yeah?
665
00:28:45,323 --> 00:28:47,363
Uh...
666
00:28:47,363 --> 00:28:49,603
Yeah. Uh... Yeah.
667
00:28:49,603 --> 00:28:52,443
MUSIC: Banjo 2 by James Yorkston
& The Athletes
668
00:28:52,443 --> 00:28:55,683
# We pulled up with three miles
to go
669
00:28:57,803 --> 00:29:01,003
# Your words and tears ran wild
670
00:29:04,003 --> 00:29:08,003
# You certainly choose
your moments there
671
00:29:10,123 --> 00:29:14,123
# You certainly caught
me unaware. #