1 00:00:04,504 --> 00:00:06,673 -Previously on "Night Court"... 2 00:00:06,715 --> 00:00:08,133 -There you are. 3 00:00:08,174 --> 00:00:09,718 You're leaving, and you weren't going to even tell me? 4 00:00:09,759 --> 00:00:11,094 -I've been offered a position back home 5 00:00:11,136 --> 00:00:13,179 in Pearl River, Louisiana. 6 00:00:13,221 --> 00:00:14,723 -Oh. -And I think you'd be perfect 7 00:00:14,764 --> 00:00:17,350 for a program at Scotland Yard. -Scotland Yard? 8 00:00:17,392 --> 00:00:20,353 That's the fanciest police station in the world. 9 00:00:20,395 --> 00:00:23,189 -I guess we've been growing in different directions 10 00:00:23,231 --> 00:00:24,274 for a while now. 11 00:00:24,315 --> 00:00:26,526 -So what do we do now? 12 00:00:26,568 --> 00:00:28,153 -This is what I've always wanted. 13 00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:29,738 I'm not abandoning her. 14 00:00:29,779 --> 00:00:32,407 I mean, she knew I wasn't gonna stay around here forever. 15 00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:35,702 -Can I really ask him to stay? -No one's asked me to stay. 16 00:00:35,744 --> 00:00:39,372 -Okay, bailiff, bring in this bride to be. 17 00:00:39,414 --> 00:00:40,707 [ Sighs ] 18 00:00:40,749 --> 00:00:42,459 Roz? 19 00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:44,878 [ Cheers and applause ] 20 00:00:44,919 --> 00:00:51,885 ** 21 00:00:51,926 --> 00:00:53,720 -Mush, mush, mush. 22 00:00:55,930 --> 00:00:58,058 Hello, Roz. 23 00:00:58,099 --> 00:00:59,768 -What's the point in knowing a judge 24 00:00:59,809 --> 00:01:02,645 if you can't let a little law bending slide? 25 00:01:02,687 --> 00:01:05,648 -What? You threw a bouncer through a plate glass window. 26 00:01:05,690 --> 00:01:09,569 Look at you, you're still holding his ponytail. 27 00:01:09,611 --> 00:01:11,738 -Well, I worked in a court long enough to know, 28 00:01:11,780 --> 00:01:15,617 it's illegal to destroy evidence. 29 00:01:15,658 --> 00:01:19,204 -It's good to see you, Roz. -You too, Fielding. 30 00:01:19,245 --> 00:01:22,374 And look at you, finally got the big chair, 31 00:01:22,415 --> 00:01:23,917 back in your hometown. 32 00:01:23,958 --> 00:01:25,251 -Uh-huh. -How's it feel? 33 00:01:25,293 --> 00:01:28,129 -Hey, Judge, judge these. 34 00:01:29,964 --> 00:01:33,259 -Mardi Gras's over, councilman. 35 00:01:33,301 --> 00:01:35,428 -I live to serve the people. 36 00:01:35,470 --> 00:01:37,263 -You hate the people. 37 00:01:37,305 --> 00:01:39,599 -Now more than ever. 38 00:01:39,641 --> 00:01:41,601 Although it's been fun catching up with old friends. 39 00:01:41,643 --> 00:01:43,436 Took one to a Saints game the other day. 40 00:01:43,478 --> 00:01:46,606 Scattered his ashes on the 40 yard line. 41 00:01:46,648 --> 00:01:49,693 He blew past the defense, landed in the end zone. 42 00:01:49,734 --> 00:01:51,820 Final wish granted. 43 00:01:53,530 --> 00:01:55,657 Well, what about you? You still bailiffing? 44 00:01:55,699 --> 00:01:59,160 -Nah. These days, I'm a private investigator. 45 00:01:59,202 --> 00:02:01,246 I've broken up more marriages 46 00:02:01,287 --> 00:02:04,290 than Vegas and nanny cams combined. 47 00:02:04,916 --> 00:02:08,545 -And yet you're gonna give love a chance, huh? 48 00:02:08,586 --> 00:02:10,422 -You'd like her? -Yeah, she a person? 49 00:02:10,463 --> 00:02:12,924 'Cause you know how I feel about those. 50 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:16,302 -She was a person, but she gave it up to be a lawyer. 51 00:02:16,344 --> 00:02:18,013 -[ Chuckles ] -Roz Russell, 52 00:02:18,054 --> 00:02:19,431 you're free to go. 53 00:02:19,472 --> 00:02:22,142 -Oh, well, Fielding, it's been real. 54 00:02:22,183 --> 00:02:25,020 Thanks for, well, nothing. 55 00:02:25,061 --> 00:02:26,479 -Oh, wait. 56 00:02:26,521 --> 00:02:28,314 Hey, listen, I'm sorry I couldn't 57 00:02:28,356 --> 00:02:30,650 salvage your bachelorette party, 58 00:02:30,692 --> 00:02:33,445 but look, at least you got to see some skin. 59 00:02:33,486 --> 00:02:36,990 And the reason why he wasn't reelected. 60 00:02:37,032 --> 00:02:39,492 -You know, for a minute there, I thought you might be 61 00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:41,453 apologizing for something else. 62 00:02:41,494 --> 00:02:43,246 -Like what? -How about what you said 63 00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:47,167 to me the last time I saw you in 1997 -- 64 00:02:47,208 --> 00:02:50,003 "I'll be right back." 65 00:02:50,045 --> 00:02:52,339 -Oh, right. 66 00:02:52,380 --> 00:02:55,300 Hey, let me try to make it up to you. 67 00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:02,349 -Ah, you remembered my favorite drink. 68 00:03:02,390 --> 00:03:04,559 -Huh? -Free. 69 00:03:04,601 --> 00:03:05,643 -Uh-huh. 70 00:03:07,270 --> 00:03:09,356 -I'm what's known as an olfactophile. 71 00:03:09,397 --> 00:03:11,858 Someone who appreciates the world through smell, 72 00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:14,569 and if it's a crime to use our most powerful 73 00:03:14,611 --> 00:03:18,073 sense to experience the greatest city in the world, 74 00:03:18,114 --> 00:03:21,743 then, madam, lock me up. 75 00:03:21,785 --> 00:03:24,204 -That is not a crime, but do you know what is? 76 00:03:24,245 --> 00:03:28,083 Hiding under a park bench to sniff butts. 77 00:03:28,124 --> 00:03:29,501 Three months. 78 00:03:29,542 --> 00:03:33,004 Enjoy all the smells that jail has to offer. 79 00:03:35,090 --> 00:03:39,135 -Ooh, someone got orchids. 80 00:03:39,177 --> 00:03:40,762 -Flowers, nice. 81 00:03:40,804 --> 00:03:42,722 Romance or cat and mouse game with a serial killer? 82 00:03:42,764 --> 00:03:46,017 'Cause I've been on both sides of that coin. 83 00:03:46,059 --> 00:03:48,478 -You know, people say that it's hard to date in New York, 84 00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:50,146 but not for me. 85 00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:52,399 I landed myself a real catch. 86 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:55,402 Blonde, blue-eyed, talking to you right now. 87 00:03:55,443 --> 00:03:58,697 It's me. I'm dating myself. 88 00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:01,574 -The bouquet of doll heads from the Green Point Creeper 89 00:04:01,616 --> 00:04:04,494 was less disturbing than that. 90 00:04:04,536 --> 00:04:06,579 -There's just been a lot of changes recently. 91 00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:08,915 Dan's gone. I'm not engaged anymore. 92 00:04:08,957 --> 00:04:10,959 I just felt like it was a good time to step back 93 00:04:11,001 --> 00:04:15,588 and focus on myself, with all the perks of a relationship -- 94 00:04:15,630 --> 00:04:20,385 flowers, breakfast in bed, sweet check-in texts. 95 00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:24,639 "Me up?" I am. "Come over." I am. 96 00:04:25,598 --> 00:04:28,268 -Yeah, I don't know what she sees in her. 97 00:04:28,309 --> 00:04:29,519 -Well, they know what they say. 98 00:04:29,561 --> 00:04:30,812 You can't make a queen's trifle 99 00:04:30,854 --> 00:04:33,606 on Boxing Day without a few nuts. 100 00:04:33,648 --> 00:04:35,692 I'm sorry, it's from my time in England. 101 00:04:35,734 --> 00:04:37,152 When you're immersed in the culture, 102 00:04:37,193 --> 00:04:38,987 it's bloody hard to shake. 103 00:04:39,029 --> 00:04:41,781 -You know, you're not the only one immersed in a new culture. 104 00:04:41,823 --> 00:04:45,452 Behold, New York City's newest part time sports agent. 105 00:04:45,493 --> 00:04:48,496 -Look who's got herself a Charlie side Hustle. 106 00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:51,958 Charlie Hustle? Pete Rose? 107 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:56,379 From the sport with all the bases and balls called baseball? 108 00:04:56,421 --> 00:04:58,923 -Gurgs, I'm only doing American sports. 109 00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:03,261 And I am killing it. I just need one thing -- clients. 110 00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:06,181 I almost signed the newest young hot basketball player, 111 00:05:06,222 --> 00:05:08,183 but his mother wouldn't let him go out to dinner with me 112 00:05:08,224 --> 00:05:10,477 because he's only 10. 113 00:05:10,518 --> 00:05:11,644 -Basketball. [ Chuckles ] 114 00:05:11,686 --> 00:05:13,855 Curling, that's a real sport. 115 00:05:13,897 --> 00:05:17,817 All you need is a broom and a dream. 116 00:05:17,859 --> 00:05:20,403 -How long is he going to be filling in as clerk for? 117 00:05:20,445 --> 00:05:21,738 This isn't even the next case, 118 00:05:21,780 --> 00:05:24,157 it's just his recipe for grilled cheese. 119 00:05:24,199 --> 00:05:27,660 It says, "Bread, cheese, hot." 120 00:05:27,702 --> 00:05:29,162 -I don't even know what to call him. 121 00:05:29,204 --> 00:05:32,415 Judge Flobert? Clerk Flobert? Judge Clerk Flobert? 122 00:05:32,457 --> 00:05:34,125 -People used to call me Flowbee, 123 00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:37,003 and that's only 'cause I cut people's hair with my vacuum. 124 00:05:37,045 --> 00:05:40,674 Oh, and I'm gonna need that recipe back. 125 00:05:40,715 --> 00:05:42,842 -It's only temporary, and we didn't have any options 126 00:05:42,884 --> 00:05:44,719 after Neil moved to Tahoe with his girlfriend. 127 00:05:44,761 --> 00:05:46,846 At least I hear from him. 128 00:05:46,888 --> 00:05:48,682 -Still no updates from Dan? 129 00:05:48,723 --> 00:05:51,017 -I got one call, and it was a butt dial. 130 00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:53,436 And then there was a three minute voicemail of him 131 00:05:53,478 --> 00:05:56,356 mumbling curses at stop signs. 132 00:05:56,398 --> 00:05:58,858 But I am focused on me, and tonight, 133 00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:02,862 I am sending me on a very romantic scavenger hunt. 134 00:06:02,904 --> 00:06:04,739 Where do you think I should hide this? 135 00:06:04,781 --> 00:06:07,951 Keep in mind, I'm very good at finding things that I hide. 136 00:06:07,992 --> 00:06:11,621 -Is this what goes on when I'm not around? 137 00:06:12,414 --> 00:06:14,708 -Dan? What are you doing here? 138 00:06:14,749 --> 00:06:16,376 -Ruining the surprise. 139 00:06:16,418 --> 00:06:19,713 Next up, the People vs. Dan Fielding. 140 00:06:19,754 --> 00:06:22,215 -Well, that's a kick in the knickers, innit? 141 00:06:22,257 --> 00:06:25,218 I'm plain gobsmacked, I am. 142 00:06:25,260 --> 00:06:27,178 -Did you get a haircut? 143 00:06:32,684 --> 00:06:34,144 -Dan, are you really here, or am I 144 00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:36,479 in that courtroom prank show I'm always scared exists? 145 00:06:36,521 --> 00:06:37,814 -We've had this discussion before, 146 00:06:37,856 --> 00:06:40,316 nobody wants to come here and do pranks. 147 00:06:40,358 --> 00:06:43,278 Being here is the prank. 148 00:06:43,319 --> 00:06:46,698 -Mr. Fielding is charged with destruction of property. 149 00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:48,867 Now, you maybe inclined to show pity 150 00:06:48,908 --> 00:06:50,785 because, well, he's lost and confused 151 00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:53,079 and he can't pull off those leggings, 152 00:06:53,121 --> 00:06:56,082 stylistically or with both hands and a stick of butter. 153 00:06:56,124 --> 00:06:57,876 [ Laughs ] 154 00:06:57,917 --> 00:07:00,879 -Objection. Enjoying this too much. 155 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,757 -I'm so happy you did this just so you can see me. 156 00:07:03,798 --> 00:07:06,092 I had the same idea of getting arrested in Louisiana 157 00:07:06,134 --> 00:07:07,344 just to see you. 158 00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:09,137 Classic us. 159 00:07:09,179 --> 00:07:10,972 -Actually, I'm only here because I was deceived 160 00:07:11,014 --> 00:07:13,058 into doing someone a favor. 161 00:07:13,099 --> 00:07:16,644 -Nobody deceived you, you big dumb tree trunk. 162 00:07:17,354 --> 00:07:18,730 And everything would have been fine 163 00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:20,065 if you had just stuck to the plan. 164 00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:21,775 -Hey, you know what? Maybe if you had told me 165 00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:24,486 who I was supposed to be investigating. 166 00:07:24,527 --> 00:07:26,029 -Oh, my God, Roz Russell? 167 00:07:26,071 --> 00:07:28,031 I recognize you from my dad's old Christmas cards. 168 00:07:28,073 --> 00:07:31,326 You always made a face like you didn't want to be there. 169 00:07:33,161 --> 00:07:36,456 -That's the one. 170 00:07:36,498 --> 00:07:38,208 -You must be Harry's daughter. 171 00:07:38,249 --> 00:07:41,169 -Abby Stone. Abby short for Abracadabra. 172 00:07:41,211 --> 00:07:44,881 -Looks like you're a little short for everything. 173 00:07:44,923 --> 00:07:48,218 -Oh, man, Roz is burning me up. 174 00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:50,762 -Alright, can we back to deciding who wore it better, 175 00:07:50,804 --> 00:07:53,348 Dan or the Jerry Garcia Beanie Baby? 176 00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:57,060 -We're all ears, Mr. Fielding. 177 00:07:57,102 --> 00:07:59,145 -Yes, well, this started innocently enough. 178 00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:00,939 Roz wanted me to help her with an investigation 179 00:08:00,980 --> 00:08:02,232 of a woman named Loretta, 180 00:08:02,273 --> 00:08:04,192 whose partner suspected her of cheating. 181 00:08:04,234 --> 00:08:05,735 We had a lead the alleged affair 182 00:08:05,777 --> 00:08:07,570 was happening with her workout buddy, 183 00:08:07,612 --> 00:08:09,572 so I went undercover. 184 00:08:09,614 --> 00:08:11,908 [ Clanging ] 185 00:08:12,784 --> 00:08:16,329 I blended in masterfully like a chameleon in the rainforest, 186 00:08:16,371 --> 00:08:18,081 a commando in camouflage. 187 00:08:18,123 --> 00:08:20,750 -The Chrysler Building in a corn field. 188 00:08:20,792 --> 00:08:22,085 -Pipe down. You weren't there. 189 00:08:22,127 --> 00:08:25,005 -You can't text me stuff like that. 190 00:08:25,046 --> 00:08:27,382 We're gonna get caught. 191 00:08:29,134 --> 00:08:31,511 -My finely honed powers of deduction 192 00:08:31,553 --> 00:08:34,597 directed me toward her phone, but how to get it. 193 00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:38,935 No one was going to hand me the solution on a silver platter. 194 00:08:38,977 --> 00:08:42,313 -Now lie on your backs with your eyes closed, 195 00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:44,149 especially Loretta. 196 00:08:48,111 --> 00:08:50,030 -I was disheartened to realize two things -- 197 00:08:50,071 --> 00:08:52,240 I needed her face to unlock the phone, 198 00:08:52,282 --> 00:08:55,994 and I should have been wearing yoga pants for years. 199 00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,249 When I opened the phone, 200 00:09:01,291 --> 00:09:04,794 what I saw was so shocking I almost lost my composure. 201 00:09:04,836 --> 00:09:07,297 That's it. Watch your head. Watch your head. 202 00:09:07,505 --> 00:09:10,216 [ Gong clangs ] 203 00:09:12,635 --> 00:09:14,304 Namaste. 204 00:09:15,513 --> 00:09:18,058 -The suspense is killing me. What was on the phone? 205 00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:20,143 Was it a treasure map only for you to find out 206 00:09:20,185 --> 00:09:23,980 that the treasure was inside you all along? 207 00:09:24,022 --> 00:09:28,693 -It was a picture of her fiancée, Roz. 208 00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:30,862 Yes, I thought I was helping PI Roz, 209 00:09:30,904 --> 00:09:34,991 turns out I was helping jealous fiancée Roz. 210 00:09:35,033 --> 00:09:37,869 -You were supposed to go undercover at her law firm 211 00:09:37,911 --> 00:09:40,163 as a man cutting his kids out of his will. 212 00:09:40,205 --> 00:09:43,291 -Oh, yes, and it was a role I was born to play, 213 00:09:43,333 --> 00:09:46,002 but in a great Shakespearian turn, 214 00:09:46,044 --> 00:09:48,672 yoga was closer to my building. 215 00:09:48,713 --> 00:09:50,173 -Okay, the court has heard enough. 216 00:09:50,215 --> 00:09:52,884 The defendant is ordered to replace the damaged gong 217 00:09:52,926 --> 00:09:54,594 and sentenced to verbally reply 218 00:09:54,636 --> 00:09:56,012 to all my unanswered texts 219 00:09:56,054 --> 00:09:59,140 to be served in my chambers immediately. 220 00:10:01,643 --> 00:10:03,728 -That's actually my job now. 221 00:10:03,770 --> 00:10:07,691 -Oh. Sorry, old habits. 222 00:10:07,732 --> 00:10:10,318 -You know what? Go on ahead. 223 00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:14,989 Look at that technique. 224 00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:17,283 The greats stay great. 225 00:10:19,369 --> 00:10:21,121 -Why couldn't you ask for a normal favor 226 00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:24,040 like a ride to the airport or scattering remains in a place 227 00:10:24,082 --> 00:10:25,709 I was already going? 228 00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:27,460 -Okay, give Roz a break. 229 00:10:27,502 --> 00:10:29,337 Love can make anyone act a little crazy. 230 00:10:29,379 --> 00:10:32,090 I should know, I'm dating a pretty live wire myself. 231 00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:34,718 Oh, sorry, I put the emphasis on the wrong word. 232 00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:38,221 I'm dating a pretty live wire, myself. 233 00:10:38,263 --> 00:10:39,723 -You know, it's none of my business, 234 00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:41,224 but instead of dating yourself, 235 00:10:41,266 --> 00:10:45,145 I bet you'd really hit it off with a psychiatrist. 236 00:10:45,186 --> 00:10:49,733 -Look, I'm not imagining things. Loretta has a track record. 237 00:10:49,774 --> 00:10:55,238 She got cheating on her last girlfriend, first by me. 238 00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:58,825 Then, with me. 239 00:10:58,867 --> 00:11:00,744 -By the things looked at that yoga class, 240 00:11:00,785 --> 00:11:04,914 she still has a wondering third eye. 241 00:11:04,956 --> 00:11:06,583 -But don't you think there's a chance 242 00:11:06,624 --> 00:11:11,087 that this could be more about you than her? 243 00:11:11,129 --> 00:11:13,089 -You know, she does remind me of Harry. 244 00:11:13,131 --> 00:11:16,885 He never minded his own damn business either. 245 00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:18,178 -You don't know the half of it. 246 00:11:18,219 --> 00:11:19,721 She's always on me about the way I eat. 247 00:11:19,763 --> 00:11:21,139 -You don't chew. 248 00:11:21,181 --> 00:11:23,183 I had to give you the Heimlich twice in one meal. 249 00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:27,270 -I pay for the gristle, I eat the gristle. 250 00:11:27,312 --> 00:11:32,817 -This reminds me of other rooms I didn't want to be in. 251 00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:34,778 I'll be right back. 252 00:11:34,819 --> 00:11:36,112 -I know that move. 253 00:11:36,154 --> 00:11:39,032 She is gone forever. 254 00:11:39,074 --> 00:11:40,867 -You can't just let her leave. 255 00:11:40,909 --> 00:11:43,119 What if she's about to make a huge mistake with Loretta? 256 00:11:43,161 --> 00:11:47,415 -[ Gasps ] Oh, wait, oh, right, I don't care. 257 00:11:47,457 --> 00:11:50,293 -Alright, well, I guess Roz and I have something in common. 258 00:11:50,335 --> 00:11:52,629 You're fine bailing on both of us. 259 00:11:52,671 --> 00:11:54,005 Just got back to Louisiana, 260 00:11:54,047 --> 00:11:57,467 to your swamp parties and French vampires. 261 00:11:58,176 --> 00:12:01,137 I don't know what goes on there. 262 00:12:01,179 --> 00:12:03,765 -Now, I'm going back as soon as I deal with my subletter. 263 00:12:03,807 --> 00:12:06,768 I heard that he changed my bedroom into an aquarium, 264 00:12:06,810 --> 00:12:10,438 so now I own a no-bed, all bath. 265 00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:13,233 -Guess I'll see you next time you're in town getting arrested 266 00:12:13,274 --> 00:12:14,609 in a ridiculous outfit. 267 00:12:14,651 --> 00:12:16,194 -Hey, yeah, well, I know you want to hurt me, 268 00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:20,365 but I also know I'm pulling this off. 269 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,998 -[ English accent ] No, England's nothing 270 00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:30,625 like Bridgerton. 271 00:12:30,667 --> 00:12:34,212 The people are a lot hotter, and there's so much more sex. 272 00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:37,215 -Guess who learned what kind of ball this is? 273 00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:38,925 Base. 274 00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:40,552 -Olivia, you have got to hear this. 275 00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:43,722 Gurgs' telling us all about her sexy adventures 276 00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:45,640 with her British boyfriend. 277 00:12:45,682 --> 00:12:47,767 -[ Normal accent] Oh, we don't like titles, 278 00:12:47,809 --> 00:12:49,102 though he does have one. 279 00:12:49,144 --> 00:12:51,938 He's a Duke! [ Laughs ] 280 00:12:51,980 --> 00:12:53,523 We met while he was disguised 281 00:12:53,565 --> 00:12:55,608 as a street rat in a village bazaar. 282 00:12:55,650 --> 00:12:57,569 It's a common practice amongst nobles. 283 00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:59,738 They call it Jasmine-ing. 284 00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:01,740 -Ooh, Jasmine-ing. 285 00:13:02,824 --> 00:13:05,744 -Well, wish I could sit around with you hens and cluck, 286 00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:07,412 but the sports world beckons. 287 00:13:07,454 --> 00:13:10,999 Yeah, I got a meeting with my first potential client, 288 00:13:11,041 --> 00:13:12,917 a New York Ranger. 289 00:13:12,959 --> 00:13:14,711 From hockey. 290 00:13:16,004 --> 00:13:17,464 -Olivia Moore? 291 00:13:17,505 --> 00:13:21,343 -Oh, Doug, uh... 292 00:13:21,384 --> 00:13:23,136 So when you said you were a New York Ranger, 293 00:13:23,178 --> 00:13:25,430 you -- you meant a Time Square Power -- 294 00:13:25,472 --> 00:13:28,141 -Bupp, bupp, bupp, you can't call me that, 295 00:13:28,183 --> 00:13:29,559 especially in a courthouse. 296 00:13:29,601 --> 00:13:32,437 You never know who's a lawyer round here. 297 00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:34,647 -I'm a lawyer. 298 00:13:34,689 --> 00:13:36,941 -You said you were an agent. 299 00:13:36,983 --> 00:13:39,819 I don't like being lied to. 300 00:13:39,861 --> 00:13:43,156 -I could still represent you for birthday parties. 301 00:13:45,492 --> 00:13:46,951 -Dan, what are you doing here? 302 00:13:46,993 --> 00:13:49,913 I thought you'd be back in New Orleans riding a fan boat 303 00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:52,957 or eating a Beignet Po' boy by now. 304 00:13:52,999 --> 00:13:54,918 Yeah, that's right, my good friend Siri told me all 305 00:13:54,959 --> 00:13:57,462 about what you do down there. 306 00:13:57,504 --> 00:13:58,755 -Some judge found me guilty. 307 00:13:58,797 --> 00:14:02,425 I had to come and show proof of gong. 308 00:14:02,467 --> 00:14:04,386 -You need to skedaddle. I invited Loretta here 309 00:14:04,427 --> 00:14:06,846 to get to the bottom of what's going on between her and Roz. 310 00:14:06,888 --> 00:14:08,348 -So, what's the play? 311 00:14:08,390 --> 00:14:11,017 You're gonna flirt with her and see if she bites? 312 00:14:11,059 --> 00:14:13,311 -My plan's a little more sophisticated than that. 313 00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:15,146 She's coming here for what she thinks 314 00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:17,273 is a standard lawyer/judge meet and greet, 315 00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:20,068 when the reality, is probably not gonna work. 316 00:14:20,110 --> 00:14:22,153 What was your thing? 317 00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:23,697 Flirt with her, if after 30 seconds 318 00:14:23,738 --> 00:14:27,242 she hasn't mentioned the fiancée, she's a cheater. 319 00:14:27,283 --> 00:14:30,161 You do know how to flirt, don't you? 320 00:14:30,203 --> 00:14:32,831 -I landed me, didn't I? 321 00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:35,000 Yes, I know how to flirt. 322 00:14:35,041 --> 00:14:38,169 It's subtle cues that when done on their own do nothing, 323 00:14:38,211 --> 00:14:40,714 but when stitched together form a rich tapestry. 324 00:14:40,755 --> 00:14:42,716 -Oh, God. 325 00:14:42,757 --> 00:14:45,093 -Just watch and learn. 326 00:14:45,135 --> 00:14:48,346 Arms bent, legs flexed, hair tousled, 327 00:14:48,388 --> 00:14:50,974 head tilted to release the pheromones, 328 00:14:51,016 --> 00:14:53,018 then it's all about the eyes. 329 00:14:53,059 --> 00:14:55,311 Upward gaze, piercing eye contact, 330 00:14:55,353 --> 00:14:58,940 then take it away, piercing, take it away. 331 00:14:58,982 --> 00:15:00,316 What do you think? 332 00:15:00,358 --> 00:15:03,028 -You look a puppet I wouldn't want to buy. 333 00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:04,696 -Then there are verbal cues, 334 00:15:04,738 --> 00:15:08,700 the word "prune" can make a cute pouty face. 335 00:15:08,742 --> 00:15:12,662 Do you have any prunes in your pantry? 336 00:15:12,704 --> 00:15:15,540 -Uh-huh. Here's another verbal cue. 337 00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:17,083 [ Gags ] 338 00:15:17,584 --> 00:15:19,502 -You know what? You don't get to give me advice anymore. 339 00:15:19,544 --> 00:15:21,671 You left, and now we're barely even friends. 340 00:15:21,713 --> 00:15:23,840 I don't know anything about your life in Louisiana. 341 00:15:23,882 --> 00:15:25,133 -Well, it's just like New York, 342 00:15:25,175 --> 00:15:27,052 except there's rats or alligators. 343 00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:30,680 And the pastrami is alligators. 344 00:15:30,722 --> 00:15:32,390 -You know what? Just forget about it. 345 00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:34,309 Get out of here before Loretta gets here and -- 346 00:15:34,351 --> 00:15:35,852 -Judge Stone. 347 00:15:35,894 --> 00:15:39,022 Wait, you're that weird guy from my yoga class. 348 00:15:39,064 --> 00:15:40,815 -What is this? -What? 349 00:15:40,857 --> 00:15:42,859 -My evil twin does yoga? 350 00:15:42,901 --> 00:15:45,278 Well, I must tell mother. 351 00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:50,992 -Look, based on my last subletter, 352 00:15:51,034 --> 00:15:53,495 I feel I have to ask, will you be using this primarily 353 00:15:53,536 --> 00:15:58,583 as a residence or a lab to transmorph into an Aquaman? 354 00:16:00,460 --> 00:16:03,922 Dude, you're taking way too long to answer. 355 00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:06,466 [ Knock on door ] 356 00:16:09,511 --> 00:16:10,970 -Ah. 357 00:16:11,012 --> 00:16:13,890 -So, how's it going with you and your Frankenstein? 358 00:16:13,932 --> 00:16:16,685 -[ Chuckles ] -You two gonna share clothes? 359 00:16:16,726 --> 00:16:18,436 -Yeah. 360 00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:20,355 I take it everything is alright with Loretta 361 00:16:20,397 --> 00:16:23,441 since your hands are free of murder weapons. 362 00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:27,529 -I'd never give you the sweet relief of death, 363 00:16:27,570 --> 00:16:31,116 but yeah, Loretta and I are good. 364 00:16:31,157 --> 00:16:32,492 -Good. -She did rip me a new one 365 00:16:32,534 --> 00:16:34,744 after seeing you and Harry's kid in the cafeteria. 366 00:16:34,786 --> 00:16:39,791 -What? My evil twin and Abby got into a fight in the cafeteria? 367 00:16:40,792 --> 00:16:43,461 -But it did lead to a heart to heart. 368 00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:46,923 I realized our problem was more about me than her. 369 00:16:46,965 --> 00:16:50,093 -Good God, that means Abby's advice was right. 370 00:16:50,135 --> 00:16:51,469 Ugh, she will be insufferable. 371 00:16:51,511 --> 00:16:54,889 You sure you don't want to kill me? 372 00:16:54,931 --> 00:16:57,767 -Turned out the yoga lady's a musician. 373 00:16:57,809 --> 00:17:00,812 Loretta's surprising me with my favorite song at our wedding. 374 00:17:00,854 --> 00:17:02,522 -Oh, my God, you're gonna walk down the aisle 375 00:17:02,564 --> 00:17:05,859 to John Tesh's "NBA on NBC"? 376 00:17:06,526 --> 00:17:09,237 I'm so happy that you found somebody 377 00:17:09,279 --> 00:17:10,864 that cares about you that much. 378 00:17:10,905 --> 00:17:15,285 -And I'm glad you found another Stone to look after you. 379 00:17:15,326 --> 00:17:17,328 How did she give you the Heimlich, by the way? 380 00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:20,165 -She leapt off a table. 381 00:17:20,206 --> 00:17:23,043 Third time, she got it. 382 00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:27,672 -Well, if you ever want to talk to an old friend 383 00:17:27,714 --> 00:17:31,801 who doesn't live in an urn, I'm around. 384 00:17:31,843 --> 00:17:34,596 -Well, you know the good thing about having urn friends 385 00:17:34,637 --> 00:17:36,348 is that once you spread the ashes, 386 00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:39,851 you get to keep the urn as a souvenir. 387 00:17:39,893 --> 00:17:41,686 Jelly belly? 388 00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:45,732 -I'll send your wedding invitation here, 389 00:17:45,774 --> 00:17:51,071 unless your stubborn ass insists on being all alone in Louisiana. 390 00:17:51,112 --> 00:17:53,698 And I don't think these guys are gonna spread you 391 00:17:53,740 --> 00:17:55,575 at a Saints game. 392 00:18:00,246 --> 00:18:02,457 -Some friends you are. 393 00:18:07,796 --> 00:18:09,297 -Dougy baby, hey, you are booked 394 00:18:09,339 --> 00:18:11,132 this Saturday for the Feldman twins' birthday party. 395 00:18:11,174 --> 00:18:14,511 Yeah, now, they are paying you in cake, but it's carrot, 396 00:18:14,552 --> 00:18:16,680 so I'm gonna waive my commiss-- 397 00:18:16,721 --> 00:18:19,265 Hello? 398 00:18:19,307 --> 00:18:21,184 Doug? 399 00:18:21,226 --> 00:18:23,520 My only client just fired me. 400 00:18:23,561 --> 00:18:25,271 This whole world class sports agent 401 00:18:25,313 --> 00:18:26,356 turned kids character party booker 402 00:18:26,398 --> 00:18:29,776 may not be the move for me. 403 00:18:29,818 --> 00:18:31,820 -Why do you even need a side hustle? 404 00:18:31,861 --> 00:18:34,030 -Everyone has something exciting going on. 405 00:18:34,072 --> 00:18:37,117 My social life isn't taking off, my career's at at standstill. 406 00:18:37,158 --> 00:18:39,786 What's left? 407 00:18:39,828 --> 00:18:41,579 I'm going to be one of those people who knows 408 00:18:41,621 --> 00:18:44,165 too much about ramen. 409 00:18:44,207 --> 00:18:46,209 -I don't get the ramen craze. 410 00:18:46,251 --> 00:18:47,794 I like spaghetti, and I like soup, 411 00:18:47,836 --> 00:18:51,089 but I don't like them in one wet bucket. 412 00:18:51,131 --> 00:18:53,174 -Wet bucket? 413 00:18:53,216 --> 00:18:55,343 Now I don't even have ramen. 414 00:18:55,385 --> 00:19:01,182 -Wait, I know you feel like everybody's got something, 415 00:19:01,224 --> 00:19:05,478 but the truth is my England stories are all made up. 416 00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:08,064 -Wait, what? -I was too scared. 417 00:19:08,106 --> 00:19:09,566 I've never been abroad. 418 00:19:09,607 --> 00:19:11,026 So I stayed in New York and watched everything 419 00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:12,485 Idris Elba's ever done, but this time, 420 00:19:12,527 --> 00:19:15,655 with the sound on. 421 00:19:15,697 --> 00:19:18,199 At least you were brave enough to try something, 422 00:19:18,241 --> 00:19:20,702 even if it did fail. 423 00:19:20,744 --> 00:19:25,123 -Yeah. Guess that was incredibly brave of me. 424 00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:28,626 Inspiring even. 425 00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:32,547 -Thanks, Gurgs. That really means a lot. 426 00:19:32,589 --> 00:19:36,551 [ "Rule Britannia" ring tone plays ] 427 00:19:36,593 --> 00:19:38,803 -You need to get that? 428 00:19:39,471 --> 00:19:42,974 -Uh, it's probably spam. 429 00:19:43,016 --> 00:19:45,894 -It says "the Duke." 430 00:19:46,936 --> 00:19:50,732 You know, I still appreciate you trying. 431 00:19:50,774 --> 00:19:52,567 -Wet buckets, my treat? 432 00:19:52,609 --> 00:19:55,487 -Sure. -Really dating a royal, huh? 433 00:19:55,528 --> 00:19:56,738 -Yeah, but a lot of people gotta die 434 00:19:56,780 --> 00:19:59,616 in order for him to rule anything good. 435 00:20:01,451 --> 00:20:05,914 -Okay, you want to know how my dream job in Louisiana is going? 436 00:20:05,955 --> 00:20:08,500 -I don't know. Maybe I'm not that interested anymore. 437 00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:09,918 -I hate it. 438 00:20:09,959 --> 00:20:12,420 -I am just so into this article about squids. 439 00:20:12,462 --> 00:20:14,422 They are smart and sensitive. 440 00:20:14,464 --> 00:20:18,343 Some say they are the koalas of the sea. 441 00:20:18,385 --> 00:20:20,220 -Being a judge stinks. 442 00:20:20,261 --> 00:20:22,514 It's all this listening, very little arguing, 443 00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:23,973 nobody gets to see my fabulous suits 444 00:20:24,015 --> 00:20:25,600 'cause I'm covered by this black robe 445 00:20:25,642 --> 00:20:28,561 that does absolutely nothing for me. 446 00:20:30,146 --> 00:20:31,731 -Mm-hmm. 447 00:20:33,566 --> 00:20:36,695 No more follow ups on my end. 448 00:20:36,736 --> 00:20:38,697 -And it's lonely. 449 00:20:38,738 --> 00:20:40,615 Everyone I knew is gone, 450 00:20:40,657 --> 00:20:44,536 scattered to the wind, some literally. 451 00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:47,122 I mean, I love New Orleans, 452 00:20:47,163 --> 00:20:50,417 but I mean, that place just isn't home anymore. 453 00:20:50,458 --> 00:20:52,377 -'Cause home is...? 454 00:20:52,419 --> 00:20:54,462 -I am not going to say here. 455 00:20:54,504 --> 00:20:55,797 -Ah, you said it! 456 00:20:55,839 --> 00:20:59,092 -Okay, okay, okay. 457 00:20:59,134 --> 00:21:01,553 -Welcome back, councilor. We should go out and celebrate. 458 00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:05,015 Not tonight. I'm taking me out for our one week anniversary. 459 00:21:05,056 --> 00:21:06,641 -Well, now that I've got my job back, 460 00:21:06,683 --> 00:21:07,976 there's someone you need to get rid of. 461 00:21:08,018 --> 00:21:10,812 That nut job you're dating. 462 00:21:10,854 --> 00:21:13,648 -Done. I've been trying to end it for a while. 463 00:21:13,690 --> 00:21:15,859 Turns out I'm a lot. 464 00:21:16,609 --> 00:21:19,446 You know, you're lucky I'm even letting you come back. 465 00:21:19,487 --> 00:21:22,407 This team was really starting to gel. 466 00:21:22,449 --> 00:21:24,743 -Good night, Blanche. 467 00:21:25,827 --> 00:21:28,663 -Believe it or not, he's getting closer. 468 00:21:30,206 --> 00:21:32,709 -[ Wind whistling ] -It's funny.