1 00:00:06,049 --> 00:00:08,509 ‎(鲍勃大男孩速食餐厅) 2 00:00:11,763 --> 00:00:14,223 ‎谁想聊聊神的信息? 3 00:00:14,307 --> 00:00:16,309 ‎-这个家伙! ‎-想不想聊聊神的信息? 4 00:00:16,392 --> 00:00:18,561 ‎先生 这是给你的 谢谢 5 00:00:18,644 --> 00:00:19,854 ‎别随手扔掉! 6 00:00:19,937 --> 00:00:21,355 ‎他扔掉了 7 00:00:22,190 --> 00:00:23,441 ‎没公德心! 8 00:00:23,524 --> 00:00:24,942 ‎-神的信息! ‎-你懂的 9 00:00:25,026 --> 00:00:27,653 ‎-不感兴趣吗?不要紧的 ‎-不要吗?这也… 10 00:00:27,737 --> 00:00:29,280 ‎你做得很好了 11 00:00:30,031 --> 00:00:31,282 ‎好像时机不对 12 00:00:32,909 --> 00:00:33,826 ‎反应真好 13 00:00:33,910 --> 00:00:36,454 ‎-很好 ‎-我没想到我可以 融入一些情绪 14 00:00:36,537 --> 00:00:39,123 ‎-感觉不错 ‎-加油 你做得很好 15 00:00:39,207 --> 00:00:41,042 ‎边跳舞边发传单 16 00:00:43,211 --> 00:00:44,087 ‎-这… ‎-不要紧的 17 00:00:44,170 --> 00:00:47,465 ‎谁想知道神捎来的信息? 18 00:00:47,548 --> 00:00:48,382 ‎这位先生 19 00:00:48,466 --> 00:00:51,636 ‎你们好 不信神不怪 信神神就在 20 00:00:51,719 --> 00:00:54,055 ‎-滚开 ‎-社会败类 21 00:00:54,138 --> 00:00:56,015 ‎他不喜欢对联 这些人都不喜欢对联 22 00:00:56,099 --> 00:00:59,393 ‎-谁想聊聊神? ‎-有人想聊聊神吗? 23 00:01:00,269 --> 00:01:02,438 ‎NETFLIX 剧集 24 00:01:03,981 --> 00:01:07,151 ‎坐在我眼前的是 ‎大名鼎鼎的米尔顿·索普牧师 25 00:01:07,235 --> 00:01:12,698 ‎他在短时间内成为南加州 ‎最有权威且深受爱戴的宗教代表人物 26 00:01:12,782 --> 00:01:17,370 ‎塔玛拉 你这个说法不太正确 ‎但我感谢你的欣赏 也祝福你 27 00:01:17,870 --> 00:01:21,707 ‎我想知道你第一次听到神的呼召 ‎是什么时候? 28 00:01:21,791 --> 00:01:24,502 ‎我就引用已故伟大民谣歌手 ‎约翰尼·卡什的名言 29 00:01:24,585 --> 00:01:28,297 ‎我坚信他目前在地狱被火烧 30 00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:30,299 ‎“我上过高山 跨过大海” 31 00:01:31,008 --> 00:01:32,051 ‎我以前不是好人… 32 00:01:32,135 --> 00:01:34,303 ‎-早安 ‎-早安 33 00:01:35,555 --> 00:01:36,889 ‎你在看什么呢? 34 00:01:37,431 --> 00:01:40,810 ‎我不是跟你说过 ‎这个下三滥牧师很眼熟吗? 35 00:01:40,893 --> 00:01:43,521 ‎我找到了一支旧的电视广告 ‎我果然没猜错 36 00:01:43,604 --> 00:01:45,231 ‎我以前有个善良贴心的姑姑 37 00:01:45,314 --> 00:01:48,067 ‎她听信了他的鬼话 ‎结果钱都被他骗光了 38 00:01:48,151 --> 00:01:49,569 ‎-这也太可恶了 ‎-对啊 39 00:01:49,652 --> 00:01:50,862 ‎-天啊 ‎-看到他了! 40 00:01:51,529 --> 00:01:53,781 ‎天啊 外面好多人 41 00:01:53,865 --> 00:01:56,742 ‎屋外的人越来越多了 42 00:01:56,826 --> 00:02:00,288 ‎街头巷尾停满了采访车 太可怕了 43 00:02:00,371 --> 00:02:02,415 ‎太失控了 44 00:02:03,124 --> 00:02:04,542 ‎我们必须离开这里 45 00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:06,377 ‎好啊 你想去哪里? 46 00:02:06,460 --> 00:02:08,004 ‎我们不是应该去上班吗? 47 00:02:08,087 --> 00:02:09,338 ‎糟糕 48 00:02:10,006 --> 00:02:11,549 ‎我老忘记我还要上班 49 00:02:13,426 --> 00:02:14,260 ‎天啊 50 00:02:14,343 --> 00:02:15,887 ‎(发光是罪) 51 00:02:15,970 --> 00:02:17,180 ‎天啊 52 00:02:17,263 --> 00:02:18,723 ‎克拉克 你能治愈我吗? 53 00:02:18,806 --> 00:02:19,974 ‎对不起 恕我做不到 54 00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:21,851 ‎-留点隐私 好吗? ‎-对不起 你好 55 00:02:34,989 --> 00:02:36,407 ‎你刚刚说了什么? 56 00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:40,661 ‎我好像用西语引用了 ‎《哥林多前书》的一段经节 57 00:02:42,455 --> 00:02:44,999 ‎很高兴看到这么多人聚在这里 58 00:02:45,082 --> 00:02:47,335 ‎-有的人看起来充满愤怒 ‎-我要痛扁你一顿 59 00:02:47,418 --> 00:02:49,670 ‎闭嘴 退后! ‎知道为什么你们被视为疯子吗? 60 00:02:49,754 --> 00:02:51,255 ‎因为你们表现得就跟疯子一样 61 00:02:52,590 --> 00:02:55,718 ‎你们都是彻头彻尾的疯子 ‎小心我撞你们 62 00:02:55,801 --> 00:02:57,261 ‎滚开 小姨太 63 00:02:58,054 --> 00:02:58,888 ‎让开! 64 00:02:58,971 --> 00:03:01,140 ‎你们不是应该 ‎跑去参加支持拥枪游行吗? 65 00:03:01,224 --> 00:03:02,767 ‎你不戴头盔吗? 66 00:03:02,850 --> 00:03:05,436 ‎不戴了 我脑袋里的金属片够烫了 67 00:03:20,993 --> 00:03:24,038 ‎-行不通 为什么我做不到? ‎-莫辛 68 00:03:25,039 --> 00:03:26,916 ‎你已经破解两面了 69 00:03:26,999 --> 00:03:30,294 ‎我要六面 只破解两面不算什么 70 00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:33,631 ‎该死的邪恶魔方 71 00:03:34,215 --> 00:03:35,049 ‎去他妈的! 72 00:03:40,054 --> 00:03:43,099 ‎对不起 我刚才情绪失控了 73 00:03:43,724 --> 00:03:45,559 ‎我觉得跟我的成长环境有关 74 00:03:46,727 --> 00:03:48,729 ‎你可能也感同身受 是这样的 75 00:03:49,480 --> 00:03:52,066 ‎我父母是从巴基斯坦移民过来的 76 00:03:52,149 --> 00:03:56,112 ‎所以失败从来不是我们的选择 77 00:03:56,195 --> 00:03:57,488 ‎我理解的 78 00:03:57,571 --> 00:04:00,241 ‎我也认为失败不是一种选择 79 00:04:00,324 --> 00:04:03,286 ‎是啊 但你已经做得很好了 80 00:04:03,369 --> 00:04:07,290 ‎谢谢 多谢你的赞赏 ‎听你这么说 我感到很开心 81 00:04:07,373 --> 00:04:08,791 ‎莫辛 82 00:04:10,209 --> 00:04:12,128 ‎不过是一个彩色方块 没必要发脾气 83 00:04:12,211 --> 00:04:17,216 ‎告诉你一个有用的秘诀 ‎YouTube上有个破解魔方的视频 84 00:04:17,883 --> 00:04:21,387 ‎-我看了用五分钟就破解了 ‎-我不想看视频作弊 85 00:04:21,470 --> 00:04:24,640 ‎我想要好好学习 ‎我也很清楚你在说谎 86 00:04:25,349 --> 00:04:27,476 ‎你根本不曾破解过方块 87 00:04:28,894 --> 00:04:32,481 ‎重点是 只要我想 我就办得到 88 00:04:32,565 --> 00:04:33,941 ‎这些视频都很有用 89 00:04:34,942 --> 00:04:38,612 ‎你说得对 我的确从没破解过魔方 90 00:04:39,238 --> 00:04:43,576 ‎说真的 我也不太懂得 ‎怎么浏览YouTube视频 91 00:04:43,659 --> 00:04:45,703 ‎这也太荒谬了 92 00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:50,082 ‎你在一家科技公司上班 ‎就连小朋友都懂得上YouTube 93 00:04:50,166 --> 00:04:52,251 ‎但上YouTube需要密码或什么的 94 00:04:53,002 --> 00:04:54,045 ‎嗨 各位同事 95 00:04:54,962 --> 00:04:56,589 ‎-瞧瞧这对璧人 ‎-嗨 汤姆 96 00:04:56,672 --> 00:04:59,133 ‎你们已经突破炮友阶段了吗? 97 00:04:59,216 --> 00:05:03,596 ‎天啊 汤姆 ‎你怎么可以说这么难听的话? 98 00:05:03,679 --> 00:05:07,641 ‎这年头已经没人这么说话了 ‎你当我们是什么关系? 99 00:05:08,225 --> 00:05:12,730 ‎说真的 其实我有失读症 ‎我连今年是哪一年都不清楚 100 00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:14,607 ‎完全说不通 101 00:05:14,690 --> 00:05:15,900 ‎随你怎么说吧 102 00:05:16,901 --> 00:05:17,735 ‎对不起 103 00:05:18,486 --> 00:05:19,737 ‎什么? 104 00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:24,367 ‎麻烦你重复一次 ‎你刚刚对我说什么? 105 00:05:26,285 --> 00:05:27,286 ‎对不起 106 00:05:28,871 --> 00:05:30,122 ‎凡事都有第一次 107 00:05:30,998 --> 00:05:34,752 ‎我意识到我说的话没经大脑 108 00:05:35,628 --> 00:05:37,588 ‎你也懂我了 我向来喜欢说黄色笑话 109 00:05:38,339 --> 00:05:42,176 ‎每次话到嘴边 我都会脱口而出 110 00:05:42,259 --> 00:05:46,055 ‎总是来不及阻止自己说出 ‎不该说的蠢话 111 00:05:48,349 --> 00:05:50,017 ‎我想就此向你道歉 112 00:05:50,101 --> 00:05:53,270 ‎好吧 汤姆 我接受你的道歉 113 00:05:53,354 --> 00:05:55,981 ‎-这是真的吗? ‎-你一定要录下来 114 00:05:56,065 --> 00:05:59,318 ‎你听我说 我昨晚怎么睡都睡不好 115 00:05:59,402 --> 00:06:02,822 ‎我认为这跟我看了你发光的视频有关 116 00:06:02,905 --> 00:06:05,658 ‎我成了一个新造的人 117 00:06:06,242 --> 00:06:08,577 ‎克拉克 你有没有可能是神? 118 00:06:08,661 --> 00:06:11,705 ‎所以你才会发光 你才会无所不知 119 00:06:12,540 --> 00:06:14,875 ‎我想成为更好的人 也许你帮得上我 120 00:06:14,959 --> 00:06:16,210 ‎因为你是… 121 00:06:17,420 --> 00:06:18,712 ‎神拣选的人 对吗? 122 00:06:18,796 --> 00:06:20,214 ‎我也说不上来 123 00:06:20,297 --> 00:06:24,260 ‎你知道吗?我已经悟出人生的真谛 124 00:06:24,343 --> 00:06:27,263 ‎也许我的使命是成为更好的人 125 00:06:27,346 --> 00:06:28,764 ‎我相信我做得到的 126 00:06:29,432 --> 00:06:31,642 ‎人生都有一个使命 ‎我的使命就是跟随你 127 00:06:32,268 --> 00:06:33,978 ‎-跟随我? ‎-对啊 128 00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:37,857 ‎我可以抱你吗? 129 00:06:38,816 --> 00:06:40,609 ‎当然可以 130 00:06:42,278 --> 00:06:44,572 ‎来吧 老兄 没事的 汤姆 131 00:06:44,655 --> 00:06:46,365 ‎这是我感受过最温暖的拥抱 132 00:06:48,659 --> 00:06:49,493 ‎天啊 133 00:06:54,665 --> 00:06:55,499 ‎好吧 134 00:06:55,583 --> 00:06:56,876 ‎我发光了 135 00:06:56,959 --> 00:06:59,628 ‎当然了 ‎我可以感到你的能量流过我的身心 136 00:07:00,337 --> 00:07:04,467 ‎再不递交时间表 ‎公司就要责怪我失责 137 00:07:04,550 --> 00:07:07,136 ‎这不是我办事的手法 138 00:07:08,929 --> 00:07:10,598 ‎克拉克 你发出的光芒太美了 139 00:07:10,681 --> 00:07:12,475 ‎汤姆 别把手放在敏感处 140 00:07:13,350 --> 00:07:14,477 ‎好的 我知道了 141 00:07:17,438 --> 00:07:19,732 ‎好了 汤姆 你没事了 142 00:07:21,609 --> 00:07:24,069 ‎各位同事 ‎对不起 我无意打扰你们工作 143 00:07:24,153 --> 00:07:27,573 ‎也无意让你们看到这一幕 144 00:07:27,656 --> 00:07:28,491 ‎好了 145 00:07:29,158 --> 00:07:30,618 ‎没戏看了 146 00:07:30,701 --> 00:07:33,621 ‎没戏看了 只是有人发光了 147 00:07:33,704 --> 00:07:34,830 ‎贝拉 没戏看了 148 00:07:34,914 --> 00:07:37,583 ‎-他刚刚发光了 ‎-我知道 别大惊小怪 149 00:07:41,086 --> 00:07:46,008 ‎汤姆 我不得不说 ‎这是我见过你最讨喜的一面 150 00:07:48,719 --> 00:07:51,805 ‎哭吧 汤姆 尽管宣泄出来吧 很好 151 00:07:53,098 --> 00:07:54,391 ‎好恶心哦 152 00:07:55,726 --> 00:07:57,228 ‎我到底怎么了? 153 00:07:57,895 --> 00:08:01,357 ‎玩些有疗愈感的游戏来放松心情 ‎好好放松 154 00:08:04,485 --> 00:08:06,946 ‎-克拉克! ‎-天啊 汤姆! 155 00:08:07,029 --> 00:08:09,406 ‎汤姆 不要 天啊! 156 00:08:09,490 --> 00:08:13,661 ‎不要偷看 我最可怕的噩梦成真了! 157 00:08:13,744 --> 00:08:16,121 ‎我们已经不是同事关系了 ‎我现在是你的使徒 158 00:08:16,622 --> 00:08:18,666 ‎-你好点了吗? ‎-你是指哪方面? 159 00:08:18,749 --> 00:08:20,251 ‎你的便秘问题 160 00:08:20,334 --> 00:08:25,548 ‎不是的 这就是我最不想… ‎这是我自己的问题 不关别人的事 161 00:08:25,631 --> 00:08:28,551 ‎我不打算跟任何人说 就连使徒也是 162 00:08:28,634 --> 00:08:30,219 ‎不要紧的 老师 163 00:08:30,302 --> 00:08:32,805 ‎我有个献议 我想当你的保镖 164 00:08:32,888 --> 00:08:35,683 ‎-什么? ‎-我是认真的 我要帮你 165 00:08:36,350 --> 00:08:37,977 ‎我愿意帮你排除万难 166 00:08:38,477 --> 00:08:41,105 ‎我不知道该怎么回应你 ‎最近发生了很多事 167 00:08:41,814 --> 00:08:44,984 ‎-你打架在行吗? ‎-不会 我打架不行 168 00:08:45,067 --> 00:08:47,236 ‎那就说明你的计划有个很严重的缺陷 169 00:08:47,945 --> 00:08:50,406 ‎是吗?也对 有个瑕疵 170 00:08:50,489 --> 00:08:55,202 ‎这个瑕疵 ‎就跟偷看一个人如厕一样严重 171 00:08:56,203 --> 00:09:00,624 ‎(儿子 我是你老爸 我决定原谅你了 ‎一起来蒸个舒服的桑拿吧) 172 00:09:00,708 --> 00:09:02,293 ‎(一小时后桑拿室见) 173 00:09:02,376 --> 00:09:03,711 ‎太好了 174 00:09:03,794 --> 00:09:05,921 ‎汤姆 留点隐私 好吗? 175 00:09:06,005 --> 00:09:06,964 ‎嗨 176 00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:11,844 ‎我试过阻止他跟着你 ‎但他太阴险狡猾了 177 00:09:11,927 --> 00:09:13,262 ‎汤姆 离我们远点 178 00:09:13,345 --> 00:09:14,430 ‎休想 179 00:09:15,723 --> 00:09:16,932 ‎你在赶时间吗? 180 00:09:17,016 --> 00:09:19,268 ‎对了 我爸想找我聊聊 181 00:09:19,351 --> 00:09:21,687 ‎太好了 这是好事 182 00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:23,731 ‎我没见过你爸 你需要找个人… 183 00:09:24,398 --> 00:09:25,899 ‎陪伴或给你精神上的支持吗? 184 00:09:25,983 --> 00:09:27,860 ‎我和我爸要一起去蒸桑拿 那么… 185 00:09:27,943 --> 00:09:29,028 ‎-那我就不去了 ‎-我去 186 00:09:29,111 --> 00:09:30,529 ‎-休想 ‎-好吧 187 00:09:31,113 --> 00:09:33,866 ‎等我见过我爸后再去找你聊聊吧 188 00:09:33,949 --> 00:09:34,825 ‎好啊 189 00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:38,495 ‎我不想让你麻烦 也不想打扰到你 190 00:09:38,579 --> 00:09:39,913 ‎我不介意被你打扰 191 00:09:39,997 --> 00:09:41,582 ‎-好吧 ‎-跟你爸聊得开心点 192 00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:45,502 ‎我打算在办公室小睡一会儿 ‎晚些时候再见 193 00:09:45,586 --> 00:09:48,088 ‎不行 不准在办公室里睡觉 194 00:09:48,672 --> 00:09:51,050 ‎-飞盘哥 滚回你的窝里吧 ‎-好的 195 00:09:52,009 --> 00:09:54,845 ‎-顺便关掉天花板上的照明灯! ‎-其他人还在工作呢 196 00:09:54,928 --> 00:09:59,308 ‎好吧 各位同事 感激把手机铃声关掉 197 00:09:59,892 --> 00:10:02,311 ‎-休息五分钟 ‎-很好 198 00:10:08,108 --> 00:10:09,276 ‎他出现了! 199 00:10:11,779 --> 00:10:14,073 ‎(娶我 克拉克是神) 200 00:10:14,657 --> 00:10:16,283 ‎老爸 真抱歉 外面都是采访车 201 00:10:16,992 --> 00:10:22,539 ‎我看你很快就会发现你误会我了 202 00:10:22,623 --> 00:10:23,749 ‎克拉克 你好 203 00:10:24,333 --> 00:10:26,251 ‎老爸 你怎么可以这么做? 204 00:10:26,335 --> 00:10:28,337 ‎儿子 这位牧师是来救你的 205 00:10:28,837 --> 00:10:30,255 ‎他想跟你见个面 206 00:10:30,339 --> 00:10:34,301 ‎于是联络上我 ‎我就邀请他跟我们一起蒸桑拿 207 00:10:36,387 --> 00:10:37,304 ‎你不热吗? 208 00:10:37,388 --> 00:10:38,972 ‎义人是不会流汗的 209 00:10:39,473 --> 00:10:40,683 ‎请坐 210 00:10:40,766 --> 00:10:42,017 ‎天啊 好吧 211 00:10:43,769 --> 00:10:46,522 ‎你听过《狼来了》的故事吗? 212 00:10:46,605 --> 00:10:48,440 ‎-当然听过 ‎-作者是伊索 213 00:10:48,524 --> 00:10:51,694 ‎伊索写的这个寓言故事 ‎讲述一个男孩老爱喊“狼来了” 214 00:10:51,777 --> 00:10:56,907 ‎即使知道周围 ‎并没有前来捕猎羊群的狼 215 00:10:56,990 --> 00:11:01,078 ‎后来有一天 他真看见狼来了 216 00:11:01,704 --> 00:11:03,455 ‎于是他又大叫:“狼来了!” 217 00:11:04,123 --> 00:11:08,293 ‎镇上的人再也没来支援他 218 00:11:08,377 --> 00:11:10,629 ‎因为他们已经不再相信他的话了 219 00:11:11,213 --> 00:11:12,756 ‎结果他养的羊都被狼咬死了 220 00:11:13,465 --> 00:11:17,803 ‎这个寓言的教训是 ‎撒谎成性的人即便后来说实话了 221 00:11:17,886 --> 00:11:20,305 ‎也不会有人相信 222 00:11:21,390 --> 00:11:22,224 ‎你听得懂吗? 223 00:11:23,142 --> 00:11:25,686 ‎你的意思很明显吧 ‎你是指我就是那个男孩 224 00:11:25,769 --> 00:11:27,479 ‎-没必要拐弯抹角 ‎-没错 225 00:11:27,563 --> 00:11:32,234 ‎我绝对不会让我的羊群 ‎因为一个愚昧无知的男孩所说的谎言 226 00:11:32,317 --> 00:11:34,737 ‎而受到迷惑 227 00:11:34,820 --> 00:11:35,654 ‎你听我说 228 00:11:36,530 --> 00:11:39,700 ‎我就回应你的说法吧 我也不想的 229 00:11:39,783 --> 00:11:41,160 ‎但事情就这么发生了 230 00:11:41,243 --> 00:11:44,913 ‎这不是骗人的把戏 ‎这是真实发生的怪事 231 00:11:44,997 --> 00:11:47,207 ‎儿子 你就认了吧 232 00:11:47,291 --> 00:11:50,461 ‎你不能再说谎了 尤其是对我 233 00:11:50,544 --> 00:11:52,546 ‎别再说谎了 好吗? 234 00:11:53,338 --> 00:11:54,173 ‎不如这样吧 235 00:11:55,424 --> 00:11:56,925 ‎看看我能不能弄给你们看 236 00:12:01,180 --> 00:12:02,431 ‎你在干什么? 237 00:12:06,101 --> 00:12:07,144 ‎天啊 238 00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:08,061 ‎好了 239 00:12:08,145 --> 00:12:09,813 ‎很好 还真发光了 240 00:12:09,897 --> 00:12:10,856 ‎天啊 241 00:12:11,565 --> 00:12:15,277 ‎儿子 对不起 很抱歉我之前不相信你 242 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:19,782 ‎不要紧的 老爸 我知道要接受不容易 ‎但我真的没有骗人 243 00:12:19,865 --> 00:12:21,325 ‎你好大胆 244 00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:23,076 ‎你竟然违逆神! 245 00:12:23,160 --> 00:12:26,038 ‎-违逆? ‎-赶紧关掉这道邪恶的光 246 00:12:26,121 --> 00:12:29,666 ‎-你把遥控器藏在哪里? ‎-遥控器?我只穿着一件浴衣 247 00:12:29,750 --> 00:12:33,295 ‎-遥控器能藏在哪里?我两只手都在 ‎-我很清楚你把遥控器藏在哪里 248 00:12:33,378 --> 00:12:34,338 ‎就藏在你屁眼里 249 00:12:35,506 --> 00:12:38,342 ‎我为什么要把遥控器藏在我的… 250 00:12:38,425 --> 00:12:39,593 ‎因为你是个卑鄙小人 251 00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:43,639 ‎你敢再说我儿子是卑鄙小人 ‎我就把你的牙齿都打掉 252 00:12:43,722 --> 00:12:48,560 ‎我绝对不会让这些骗子抢走 ‎我这个敬畏神之人的光芒 253 00:12:48,644 --> 00:12:50,813 ‎我才是神真正的使者 254 00:12:52,356 --> 00:12:53,607 ‎克拉克 我发誓 255 00:12:54,358 --> 00:12:56,360 ‎你要是再搞这种骗人的把戏 256 00:12:56,985 --> 00:12:58,695 ‎我就毁了你 257 00:13:02,366 --> 00:13:04,117 ‎你去吃屎吧 258 00:13:06,161 --> 00:13:09,331 ‎你意识到 ‎你能够控制自己什么时候发光了? 259 00:13:09,414 --> 00:13:11,542 ‎我真这么觉得 260 00:13:11,625 --> 00:13:13,043 ‎这可是一大好事 261 00:13:13,627 --> 00:13:16,171 ‎希望如此吧 ‎我感觉到我的使命离我越来越近了 262 00:13:16,255 --> 00:13:17,756 ‎但我还是无法搞清楚 263 00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:21,468 ‎你总有一天一定会发现你的使命的 264 00:13:21,552 --> 00:13:23,011 ‎-谢谢你的安慰 ‎-没问题 265 00:13:23,095 --> 00:13:24,096 ‎-谢谢 ‎-喝不喝咖啡? 266 00:13:24,179 --> 00:13:25,514 ‎-不了 谢谢 ‎-马上来 267 00:13:26,098 --> 00:13:30,060 ‎你和你爸已经和好如初 这是好事 268 00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:32,020 ‎-对啊 谢谢 ‎-我们知道你们向来很要好 269 00:13:32,104 --> 00:13:33,146 ‎-谢谢 ‎-要奶精吗? 270 00:13:33,230 --> 00:13:35,774 ‎-不了 谢谢 ‎-好的 马上来 271 00:13:37,609 --> 00:13:38,735 ‎不是我多事 但是… 272 00:13:39,778 --> 00:13:42,030 ‎我想知道你妈有什么想法 273 00:13:43,115 --> 00:13:46,076 ‎她知道这件事吗?她还在健在吗? 274 00:13:46,660 --> 00:13:47,536 ‎她过得很好 275 00:13:48,036 --> 00:13:50,330 ‎我13岁那年 我父母就离婚了 276 00:13:50,414 --> 00:13:53,458 ‎当时我妈好像背着我爸出轨了 277 00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:54,543 ‎“好像”? 278 00:13:54,626 --> 00:13:57,337 ‎她是背着我爸出轨了 279 00:13:57,421 --> 00:14:02,384 ‎他们分开后 她好像不太想见到我了 280 00:14:02,467 --> 00:14:05,429 ‎但我和我爸的关系很好 ‎所以我决定留在他身边 281 00:14:05,512 --> 00:14:08,015 ‎我还是会见到我妈 每逢圣诞节… 282 00:14:09,349 --> 00:14:10,309 ‎就只有圣诞节 283 00:14:12,102 --> 00:14:12,936 ‎汤姆 284 00:14:15,647 --> 00:14:17,691 ‎恕我直言 我一直在偷听你们说话 285 00:14:17,774 --> 00:14:22,946 ‎游走在礼貌和变态之间不容易 ‎你却做到了 286 00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:25,949 ‎老兄 你为什么拿着 ‎一把又大又诡异的剑? 287 00:14:26,033 --> 00:14:27,159 ‎克拉克 288 00:14:28,911 --> 00:14:31,246 ‎在此向你献上宝剑 289 00:14:31,747 --> 00:14:33,749 ‎你也在向他求婚吗? 290 00:14:34,625 --> 00:14:36,126 ‎爱美莉 这只是一个象征 291 00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:39,004 ‎从现在起 我就是克拉克的保镖了 292 00:14:39,087 --> 00:14:40,672 ‎什么?我可没答应过你 293 00:14:40,756 --> 00:14:44,051 ‎放心吧 我不会用它来砍人 ‎毕竟剑是用雕塑泡沫做的 294 00:14:44,134 --> 00:14:45,093 ‎谢天谢地 295 00:14:45,177 --> 00:14:48,972 ‎但应该可以用来打人 296 00:14:49,681 --> 00:14:51,808 ‎要不要我去打晕那个牧师? 297 00:14:51,892 --> 00:14:52,726 ‎什么? 298 00:14:52,809 --> 00:14:54,811 ‎不行 换成你也不会同意吧? 299 00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:56,355 ‎我等你答复 300 00:14:56,438 --> 00:14:58,649 ‎你想看风向再决定 是吗? 301 00:14:58,732 --> 00:15:00,025 ‎-我模棱两可 ‎-好吧 302 00:15:00,108 --> 00:15:02,319 ‎绝对不行 不准打人 303 00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:03,612 ‎好吧 304 00:15:03,695 --> 00:15:06,949 ‎问你一个问题 ‎你怎么会有一把巨剑? 305 00:15:07,032 --> 00:15:09,034 ‎-你从哪里弄来的? ‎-我可以让你看看 306 00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:13,914 ‎谁有足够的胆量 307 00:15:14,539 --> 00:15:18,377 ‎去赴一场决定格尔伽拉命运的决斗 308 00:15:18,460 --> 00:15:23,674 ‎打败来自格格他山的食人魔? 309 00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:28,261 ‎我够大胆 我去! 310 00:15:29,137 --> 00:15:33,058 ‎你这个来自格伦达夫的哥布林 ‎实在可恶 311 00:15:33,141 --> 00:15:35,560 ‎-这是什么鬼? ‎-实况角色扮演游戏 312 00:15:35,644 --> 00:15:37,980 ‎-我是个实况角色扮演者 ‎-‎你的装扮非常干脆利索 313 00:15:38,063 --> 00:15:41,900 ‎不错嘛 来自格尔卡的格利迪尤 314 00:15:42,401 --> 00:15:43,568 ‎名字读音都很接近 315 00:15:43,652 --> 00:15:47,906 ‎没错 我就是来自格尔卡的格利迪尤 ‎我愿意挑战 316 00:15:48,407 --> 00:15:50,409 ‎来自格格他山的食人魔 317 00:15:50,492 --> 00:15:54,579 ‎单子这么多 ‎为什么偏要用“格”这个字?算了 318 00:15:54,663 --> 00:15:55,998 ‎我跟他们提过了 319 00:15:56,081 --> 00:15:58,709 ‎但名字都是弗农取的 ‎谁叫他是任务管理员呢 320 00:15:58,792 --> 00:16:00,627 ‎弗农就是那个厚颜无耻的哥布林吗? 321 00:16:00,711 --> 00:16:01,962 ‎没错 322 00:16:02,045 --> 00:16:03,380 ‎你怎么知道的? 323 00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:05,507 ‎通通给我听好! 324 00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:07,843 ‎暴雪女王来了! 325 00:16:09,886 --> 00:16:12,139 ‎来自格尔卡的格利迪尤 ‎你必须先与我单独对战 326 00:16:12,222 --> 00:16:16,852 ‎并打败我 来自格尔达夫连的格琳温 327 00:16:16,935 --> 00:16:19,104 ‎才有资格干掉 328 00:16:19,187 --> 00:16:20,147 ‎那个臭婊 329 00:16:20,230 --> 00:16:21,106 ‎得了吧 爱美莉 330 00:16:21,189 --> 00:16:22,691 ‎两位 别出戏! 331 00:16:22,774 --> 00:16:25,902 ‎单凭我一己之力 ‎就足以拯救整个格尔伽拉 332 00:16:26,528 --> 00:16:27,863 ‎吉姆、乔 333 00:16:27,946 --> 00:16:29,948 ‎释放我身上的魔兽 334 00:16:30,032 --> 00:16:30,949 ‎是 女王 335 00:16:32,242 --> 00:16:36,038 ‎格琳温 来自格尔达夫连的暴雪女王 336 00:16:36,538 --> 00:16:41,001 ‎你必须跟来自格尔卡的格利迪尤对战 337 00:16:41,084 --> 00:16:43,628 ‎有人来挑战你了! 338 00:16:46,923 --> 00:16:51,803 ‎比武! 339 00:16:51,887 --> 00:16:54,806 ‎比武开始! 340 00:16:54,890 --> 00:16:56,141 ‎-比武? ‎-对啊 341 00:16:56,224 --> 00:16:57,476 ‎-什么? ‎-重头戏来了 342 00:16:57,559 --> 00:16:59,019 ‎天啊 你和… 343 00:17:03,607 --> 00:17:04,441 ‎很好 344 00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:23,627 ‎我投降 该死的! 345 00:17:30,342 --> 00:17:32,636 ‎天啊 你输得好惨! 346 00:17:32,719 --> 00:17:34,554 ‎-绰号“定时炸弹”的汤姆 ‎-去你妈的 347 00:17:34,638 --> 00:17:35,639 ‎想骂我还轮不到你呢 348 00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:38,850 ‎原来你在这里 349 00:17:38,934 --> 00:17:40,769 ‎刚才那段视频很精彩吧? 350 00:17:40,852 --> 00:17:41,686 ‎可不是吗? 351 00:17:41,770 --> 00:17:43,772 ‎很精彩 我不介意天天都看 352 00:17:43,855 --> 00:17:46,983 ‎笑笑没烦恼 对吧?尤其是这段时期 353 00:17:47,067 --> 00:17:48,068 ‎可不是吗? 354 00:17:48,777 --> 00:17:50,779 ‎莫辛 我在想… 355 00:17:52,072 --> 00:17:53,073 ‎如果这是个预兆呢? 356 00:17:53,865 --> 00:17:55,700 ‎-什么预兆? ‎-世界末日的预兆 357 00:17:56,868 --> 00:17:59,913 ‎不会的 我不认为世界末日快到了 358 00:17:59,996 --> 00:18:03,083 ‎如果克拉克真是什么先知 359 00:18:03,166 --> 00:18:04,417 ‎这很可能就是末日的预兆 360 00:18:05,335 --> 00:18:07,379 ‎搞不好世界末日快来了 361 00:18:07,462 --> 00:18:10,632 ‎如果这是事实 ‎那么你和我 以至于所有人 362 00:18:11,883 --> 00:18:13,135 ‎都会死 363 00:18:14,386 --> 00:18:15,637 ‎你是指“诸神的黄昏”? 364 00:18:16,805 --> 00:18:18,807 ‎不是 那是电影《雷神》中的情节 365 00:18:18,890 --> 00:18:23,895 ‎我知道 我只是想缓和一下气氛 抱歉 366 00:18:27,232 --> 00:18:28,692 ‎我有东西要送给你 367 00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:36,575 ‎这不是比四面体魔方更难破解吗? 368 00:18:36,658 --> 00:18:41,246 ‎这其实是一个五角魔方 369 00:18:41,329 --> 00:18:43,832 ‎也叫十二面体魔方玩具 370 00:18:45,041 --> 00:18:45,959 ‎看起来很难破解 371 00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:48,378 ‎我也有同感 但我相信你破解得了 372 00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:54,426 ‎我欣赏你不靠作弊或上网找方案 ‎来破解魔方的态度 373 00:18:54,968 --> 00:18:57,053 ‎让人看到了你真实的个性 374 00:18:58,597 --> 00:19:01,349 ‎我觉得其他魔方太简单了 375 00:19:01,433 --> 00:19:04,102 ‎所以不要放弃破解这个魔方 ‎继续加油 376 00:19:05,604 --> 00:19:06,688 ‎谢谢你 天啊 377 00:19:07,939 --> 00:19:09,900 ‎你真有心 378 00:19:09,983 --> 00:19:11,943 ‎-很高兴你喜欢我送的礼物 ‎-我确实喜欢 379 00:19:12,027 --> 00:19:14,779 ‎-那就好 ‎-我会努力破解的 380 00:19:14,863 --> 00:19:15,780 ‎好啊 381 00:19:16,865 --> 00:19:20,076 ‎我也想说… 382 00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:23,914 ‎虽然我不希望世界末日快来了 ‎但如果真是世界末日… 383 00:19:24,539 --> 00:19:28,543 ‎我想跟你说 你是个大好人 384 00:19:30,921 --> 00:19:32,547 ‎-真的吗? ‎-真的 385 00:19:33,340 --> 00:19:34,966 ‎你很好 真的 386 00:19:39,054 --> 00:19:39,888 ‎好吧 387 00:19:48,396 --> 00:19:49,522 ‎我也觉得你… 388 00:20:01,618 --> 00:20:02,744 ‎天啊 389 00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:05,163 ‎嗨 汤姆 390 00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:10,377 ‎是不是很有趣呢? ‎其他人都看不见我 太好了 391 00:20:10,460 --> 00:20:13,922 ‎老兄 我以为再也见不到你了 你好 392 00:20:14,005 --> 00:20:15,757 ‎我们已经是朋友了 393 00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:17,133 ‎嗨 爱美莉 394 00:20:17,217 --> 00:20:20,428 ‎嗨 温蒂 你头发扎起来真好看 395 00:20:20,512 --> 00:20:23,181 ‎谢谢夸奖 你还好吧? 396 00:20:23,765 --> 00:20:26,393 ‎我在活动手肘 397 00:20:26,977 --> 00:20:28,687 ‎你应该去看医生 398 00:20:29,271 --> 00:20:30,772 ‎-嗨 克拉克 ‎-嗨 温蒂 399 00:20:31,982 --> 00:20:33,942 ‎她也看不见你吗? 400 00:20:34,025 --> 00:20:35,860 ‎我不想被世人看见 401 00:20:35,944 --> 00:20:41,324 ‎我发誓 ‎目前只有你们两个凡人看得见我 402 00:20:41,408 --> 00:20:43,159 ‎你来了 天啊 403 00:20:43,243 --> 00:20:45,161 ‎-你好 ‎-很高兴见到你 老兄 404 00:20:45,245 --> 00:20:47,247 ‎嗨 老兄 很高兴见到你 405 00:20:47,330 --> 00:20:48,456 ‎慢着 这是什么情况? 406 00:20:48,540 --> 00:20:52,377 ‎不好意思 这到底是什么情况? 407 00:20:53,128 --> 00:20:56,423 ‎长话短说 ‎我是个不可多得的高层管理员 408 00:20:56,506 --> 00:21:01,303 ‎也就是天堂与人世之间的中介人 409 00:21:01,386 --> 00:21:04,180 ‎也就是一人身兼两职 ‎但不能有所埋怨 410 00:21:04,264 --> 00:21:07,142 ‎等一下 我要搞清楚你说的话 411 00:21:07,225 --> 00:21:11,396 ‎-你是指这个家伙是天使? ‎-没错 412 00:21:11,479 --> 00:21:14,691 ‎这是怎么回事? ‎这件难看的装扮就是你的伪装? 413 00:21:14,774 --> 00:21:17,569 ‎他在天堂也是这个样子的 414 00:21:17,652 --> 00:21:18,987 ‎你在上面是干什么的? 415 00:21:19,070 --> 00:21:23,325 ‎如果天堂要举办大型活动 ‎例如大型诸神大会 416 00:21:23,408 --> 00:21:26,328 ‎我要负责联系所有“股东” 417 00:21:26,411 --> 00:21:29,748 ‎我会给与会者发出 ‎跟会议有关的实时反馈 418 00:21:29,831 --> 00:21:34,419 ‎简而言之 他会给所有与会者发出 ‎他们已经熟悉的报告 419 00:21:34,502 --> 00:21:36,421 ‎这也是他在这家公司里的职责 420 00:21:36,504 --> 00:21:41,426 ‎各位 其实我来没什么大事 ‎但有件事必须知会你们 421 00:21:41,509 --> 00:21:44,846 ‎每次听到别人说“没什么大事” ‎通常都是大事 422 00:21:44,929 --> 00:21:46,806 ‎我相信不是什么大事 搞不好是小事 423 00:21:47,307 --> 00:21:49,100 ‎其实是件大事 424 00:21:49,184 --> 00:21:51,895 ‎-你刚刚才说不是什么大事 ‎-是大事 425 00:21:52,854 --> 00:21:55,106 ‎好吧 我就直说了 426 00:21:56,775 --> 00:21:57,692 ‎她到了 427 00:21:58,401 --> 00:21:59,235 ‎谁到了? 428 00:22:00,445 --> 00:22:01,404 ‎撒旦 429 00:22:04,491 --> 00:22:06,076 ‎树倒了 430 00:24:00,273 --> 00:24:02,358 ‎字幕翻译:张庆龄