1 00:00:01,253 --> 00:00:04,256 ♪ 2 00:00:09,761 --> 00:00:10,971 [door shuts] 3 00:00:10,971 --> 00:00:12,597 MARIA: Maggie. 4 00:00:12,597 --> 00:00:13,765 - Hello! 5 00:00:13,765 --> 00:00:15,183 - Tell me what's going on. 6 00:00:15,183 --> 00:00:16,476 - Something's going on? 7 00:00:16,476 --> 00:00:18,186 - Don't hide in the fridge. 8 00:00:18,186 --> 00:00:21,439 I may not be a psychic, but I'm your mother, which is the exact same thing. 9 00:00:21,439 --> 00:00:23,024 Something's not right with you. 10 00:00:23,567 --> 00:00:25,068 Are you being harassed? 11 00:00:25,068 --> 00:00:26,278 - Feels like it. 12 00:00:26,278 --> 00:00:28,655 - I'm serious. If you've gotten in too deep with one of those groups... 13 00:00:28,655 --> 00:00:30,490 - Huh? - ...there's always help. 14 00:00:30,490 --> 00:00:32,701 Just tell me you're not in a sex cult. 15 00:00:32,701 --> 00:00:34,703 If one more person I know... 16 00:00:34,703 --> 00:00:36,288 - Calm down. 17 00:00:36,288 --> 00:00:38,415 You know I hate group activities. 18 00:00:38,832 --> 00:00:40,625 - Then explain this. 19 00:00:40,625 --> 00:00:41,960 Came for you today. 20 00:00:41,960 --> 00:00:43,420 Reeks of sex and patchouli. 21 00:00:43,420 --> 00:00:44,838 ♪ 22 00:00:44,838 --> 00:00:45,881 - Angel! 23 00:00:45,881 --> 00:00:47,048 [gasps] 24 00:00:47,799 --> 00:00:48,925 I'm freaking out. 25 00:00:48,925 --> 00:00:49,926 [giggles] 26 00:00:49,926 --> 00:00:53,763 How does Julius Moon even know who we are? 27 00:00:53,763 --> 00:00:55,932 - Girl, I have the exact same question! 28 00:00:55,932 --> 00:00:58,977 This is a hard invitation to come by. You know about these parties, right? 29 00:00:58,977 --> 00:01:01,021 - Uh-uh. - Okay, so once upon a time, 30 00:01:01,021 --> 00:01:02,814 I had a friend with benefits in New York. 31 00:01:02,814 --> 00:01:04,524 - The finance guy in the Meatpacking District. 32 00:01:04,524 --> 00:01:06,568 - No, the meatpacking guy in the Finance District. 33 00:01:06,568 --> 00:01:09,571 Anyway, his ex-husband's wedding planner's side dish 34 00:01:09,571 --> 00:01:11,907 was a piano player for these fancy parties-- 35 00:01:11,907 --> 00:01:13,158 - Wait. Who is the main character here? 36 00:01:13,158 --> 00:01:14,492 - Girl, the point is 37 00:01:14,492 --> 00:01:16,786 they have been holding exclusive 38 00:01:16,786 --> 00:01:18,830 mystic gatherings for years. 39 00:01:18,830 --> 00:01:20,999 We're talking cocktails, games, 40 00:01:20,999 --> 00:01:23,209 a couple of hot tarts being passed around. - Mm! 41 00:01:23,209 --> 00:01:24,419 - Maybe some food, too. 42 00:01:24,419 --> 00:01:26,046 - I can't wait! 43 00:01:26,046 --> 00:01:28,423 I've never been in a room full of only psychics. 44 00:01:28,423 --> 00:01:31,176 We have spent enough of our lives being outsiders. 45 00:01:31,176 --> 00:01:32,177 - Yes, girl. 46 00:01:32,177 --> 00:01:34,471 It is time for us to finally enjoy 47 00:01:34,471 --> 00:01:37,432 a night of blending the hell in. 48 00:01:37,432 --> 00:01:39,392 I think I'll wear feathers. 49 00:01:39,392 --> 00:01:41,228 [laughs] 50 00:01:41,228 --> 00:01:44,231 ♪ 51 00:01:45,398 --> 00:01:48,818 MAGGIE: We're gonna have a great night... ANGEL: Can't believe it, yeah. 52 00:01:48,818 --> 00:01:52,656 - Oh ho! What a fancy coat! I hope we're not going to the same place, 53 00:01:52,656 --> 00:01:55,033 'cause if so, we'd be really underdressed. [nervous laugh] 54 00:01:55,033 --> 00:01:57,118 - Yeah. Where are you guys off to? 55 00:01:57,118 --> 00:02:00,330 - Oh, Angel and I are going to a psychic thing. 56 00:02:00,330 --> 00:02:03,458 It's nothing. Just the who's who event of the season. 57 00:02:03,458 --> 00:02:04,834 - Psychics have seasons? 58 00:02:04,834 --> 00:02:05,961 [laughs] 59 00:02:05,961 --> 00:02:07,587 - You are bragging, and our car is here. Come on. 60 00:02:07,587 --> 00:02:09,172 - Okay! We have to go! Bye! 61 00:02:09,172 --> 00:02:10,423 - Bye. - Bye. 62 00:02:11,007 --> 00:02:13,426 - Oh, that's a hot little loaf. Where you going with that? 63 00:02:13,426 --> 00:02:15,512 - Oh, we're going to a couples dinner at Amy and Dave's. 64 00:02:15,512 --> 00:02:17,013 - [quietly] Couples dinner. Yeah. 65 00:02:17,013 --> 00:02:18,598 - Hey, you should join us. - Yes. 66 00:02:18,598 --> 00:02:22,352 - Oh, I couldn't possibly. I don't want to intrude. 67 00:02:22,352 --> 00:02:24,187 Bonjour! 68 00:02:24,187 --> 00:02:27,607 [gasps] Le beer is here. [laughs] 69 00:02:27,607 --> 00:02:29,901 - Louise! You sneaky little surpriser. 70 00:02:29,901 --> 00:02:31,528 Hey... - Aw. Hi. 71 00:02:31,528 --> 00:02:33,822 I hope I'm not crashing. You know, I hate to... 72 00:02:33,822 --> 00:02:37,033 [pop] pop the couple bubble. - Now, you stop it. You stop right now. 73 00:02:37,033 --> 00:02:38,577 You know you are always welcome here. 74 00:02:38,577 --> 00:02:39,703 - [laughs] Thanks. - Now, take off 75 00:02:39,703 --> 00:02:41,580 your nasty little shoes. Should've left them by the door. 76 00:02:41,580 --> 00:02:42,581 - Oh. - Thank you. 77 00:02:42,581 --> 00:02:44,457 - Hey, hey! - Hi! How are you? 78 00:02:44,457 --> 00:02:46,251 - Hey, why don't you invite Plant Guy? 79 00:02:46,251 --> 00:02:48,253 - Oh, that died, remember? 80 00:02:48,253 --> 00:02:50,088 Yeah, just like the ficus he gave me. 81 00:02:50,088 --> 00:02:53,091 - Well, what about that guy who beatboxes? The law student? 82 00:02:53,091 --> 00:02:54,885 - Oh, couldn't get him to stop rapping 83 00:02:54,885 --> 00:02:57,262 about constitutional law. It was awful. 84 00:02:57,262 --> 00:02:58,763 - Weren't there also two DJs? 85 00:02:58,763 --> 00:03:01,725 - Yeah. Croatia, secret family. 86 00:03:01,725 --> 00:03:04,102 It's just really rough out there. 87 00:03:04,102 --> 00:03:05,770 - Oh... 88 00:03:05,770 --> 00:03:07,188 Well, we hate them. 89 00:03:07,188 --> 00:03:09,190 OVERLAPPING: Yeah. They sucked. The worst. 90 00:03:09,190 --> 00:03:12,068 - I liked the beatboxer. - No, you don't. You don't. 91 00:03:12,068 --> 00:03:13,361 ♪ 92 00:03:13,361 --> 00:03:15,488 [Maggie laughs] ANGEL: Girl, we have arrived. 93 00:03:15,488 --> 00:03:16,865 Look at this place. 94 00:03:16,865 --> 00:03:19,910 - Clearly, we're not charging enough. - I mean... 95 00:03:20,619 --> 00:03:23,538 - Angel, if we die tonight, I'm at peace with that. 96 00:03:23,538 --> 00:03:25,999 - Girl, they can bury us together. [laughs] 97 00:03:25,999 --> 00:03:27,626 [quiet chatter] 98 00:03:27,626 --> 00:03:30,295 - Hello. - Hello, welcome. 99 00:03:30,295 --> 00:03:32,839 Mr. Moon asks that you hand over your phones. 100 00:03:32,839 --> 00:03:34,507 - Oh. - Oh. Okay. 101 00:03:34,507 --> 00:03:37,761 - And don't stand too close to the art or it'll go "beep"! [laughs] 102 00:03:37,761 --> 00:03:39,012 - That's intimidating. 103 00:03:39,012 --> 00:03:40,180 - Enjoy the evening. 104 00:03:40,180 --> 00:03:41,765 - Thank you. 105 00:03:41,765 --> 00:03:44,392 Why did I curtsy? - Oh, come on. 106 00:03:44,392 --> 00:03:46,269 No phones. You don't know this, 107 00:03:46,269 --> 00:03:49,189 but this is just like an orgy. - Oh. 108 00:03:49,189 --> 00:03:52,817 Angel, I can't believe everyone at this party is psychic. 109 00:03:52,817 --> 00:03:54,903 - I know. [gasps] - It's-- Oh my gosh. 110 00:03:54,903 --> 00:03:56,613 The energy in this room is amazing. 111 00:03:56,613 --> 00:03:59,366 [party chatter] ANGEL: Yes, ma'am. 112 00:03:59,366 --> 00:04:00,951 You have your clairvoyants, 113 00:04:00,951 --> 00:04:02,494 your mediums, 114 00:04:02,494 --> 00:04:04,037 people who work with cards, 115 00:04:04,037 --> 00:04:06,081 crystals... [gasps] 116 00:04:06,081 --> 00:04:08,375 And the ones who really matter. - Wait, Angel, 117 00:04:08,375 --> 00:04:10,418 why am I so nervous? What if they don't like me 118 00:04:10,418 --> 00:04:12,671 and I don't get invited back? Help. 119 00:04:12,671 --> 00:04:14,548 - Honey, breathe, breathe, breathe, okay? 120 00:04:14,548 --> 00:04:17,717 Oh, you remind me of me at my first pride. 121 00:04:17,717 --> 00:04:19,844 Terrified, blonde, skinny. 122 00:04:19,844 --> 00:04:22,722 Trust me. You'll be stripping to a Bonnie Raitt song in no time. 123 00:04:22,722 --> 00:04:24,724 - Oh, I like Bonnie Raitt. - Yes. Come on. 124 00:04:24,724 --> 00:04:27,727 [overlapping laughter, chatter] 125 00:04:27,727 --> 00:04:30,480 ♪ soft music playing ♪ 126 00:04:31,189 --> 00:04:33,024 - So, Louise... 127 00:04:33,024 --> 00:04:34,734 tell us everything about not being partnered. 128 00:04:35,360 --> 00:04:36,903 What's it like? Are you on the apps? 129 00:04:36,903 --> 00:04:40,282 - Uh, yeah. I'm on the apps. I beta-tested the apps. 130 00:04:40,282 --> 00:04:42,325 I'm what the developers call a lifer. 131 00:04:42,325 --> 00:04:44,160 - You know, I've been with Ben so long, 132 00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:45,912 I've never even used a dating app. 133 00:04:45,912 --> 00:04:48,456 Do you really just swipe... infinite men? 134 00:04:48,456 --> 00:04:51,334 [laughs] LOUISE: I mean, yeah, basically. 135 00:04:51,334 --> 00:04:53,253 Look, when you start out, it's amazing, 136 00:04:53,253 --> 00:04:54,588 right? You're just matching 137 00:04:54,588 --> 00:04:57,215 with all these hot marketing bros who are "into whiskey." 138 00:04:57,215 --> 00:04:59,718 So you Google it, look up a fun fact to bring up, 139 00:04:59,718 --> 00:05:02,137 like how whiskey is the state beverage of Alabama. 140 00:05:02,137 --> 00:05:04,556 [impressed murmurs] - Did not know that. 141 00:05:04,556 --> 00:05:07,434 - You bring that up on the date, but it gets no reaction. 142 00:05:07,434 --> 00:05:09,936 And then you realize not only is this guy 143 00:05:09,936 --> 00:05:11,563 not that into whiskey, 144 00:05:11,563 --> 00:05:14,482 he's not that into getting to know who I am. 145 00:05:14,482 --> 00:05:15,650 - Aw. - You know? 146 00:05:15,650 --> 00:05:18,278 So you go back on the carousel, and you ride it 147 00:05:18,278 --> 00:05:19,571 around and around, 148 00:05:19,571 --> 00:05:22,532 just slowly lowering your standards, 149 00:05:22,532 --> 00:05:23,992 date after date. 150 00:05:23,992 --> 00:05:25,285 And you just wonder 151 00:05:25,285 --> 00:05:26,703 what the hell you're doing wrong, 152 00:05:26,703 --> 00:05:29,497 and how it is that everybody else has found the one except for you. 153 00:05:29,915 --> 00:05:30,957 [drops fork] [Amy gasps] 154 00:05:32,584 --> 00:05:33,585 [gasps] 155 00:05:33,585 --> 00:05:34,961 AMY: Girl, look at me. 156 00:05:34,961 --> 00:05:36,213 You are such a catch. 157 00:05:36,213 --> 00:05:38,256 Now, if I was matchmaking you, 158 00:05:38,256 --> 00:05:39,966 I could find you an amazing guy in, like, 159 00:05:39,966 --> 00:05:41,760 [snaps] negative one seconds. 160 00:05:41,760 --> 00:05:43,178 JESSIE: Wait. 161 00:05:43,178 --> 00:05:46,097 Can we try this? Like, swipe for you as a group? 162 00:05:46,097 --> 00:05:47,098 Is that crazy? 163 00:05:47,098 --> 00:05:49,351 - I mean, okay. It's not like 164 00:05:49,351 --> 00:05:51,728 this will end with me being more alone. [nervous laughter] 165 00:05:51,728 --> 00:05:53,521 - Unless you end up in one of those relationships 166 00:05:53,521 --> 00:05:55,315 where you end up more alone than ever. 167 00:05:56,441 --> 00:05:57,859 - Okay, Louise, give me your phone. 168 00:05:58,610 --> 00:06:00,528 We are getting you a man. 169 00:06:01,029 --> 00:06:02,822 MAN: Well, I'm a palm reader by trade 170 00:06:02,822 --> 00:06:04,866 and a sculptor by hobby. 171 00:06:04,866 --> 00:06:06,576 I really like working with my hands. 172 00:06:06,576 --> 00:06:08,161 - Well, I have two of those. 173 00:06:08,161 --> 00:06:11,206 - Why don't we work on them right now? ANGEL: Alright... 174 00:06:11,206 --> 00:06:12,874 - Ooh! Hi. 175 00:06:12,874 --> 00:06:14,626 I'm Maggie. It's so nice... 176 00:06:16,169 --> 00:06:18,129 [woman laughing] 177 00:06:18,129 --> 00:06:20,966 - I'm so sorry. Oh my god. I just related to that too hard. 178 00:06:20,966 --> 00:06:23,051 Hi! I'm Allegra. [relieved sigh] 179 00:06:23,051 --> 00:06:24,636 - I'm Maggie. 180 00:06:24,636 --> 00:06:26,137 [laughs] 181 00:06:26,137 --> 00:06:27,514 - Mm, hello. 182 00:06:27,514 --> 00:06:30,141 Are you gonna be my wing woman or am I going to be yours? 183 00:06:30,141 --> 00:06:32,227 - Maybe we should just be sister wives. 184 00:06:32,227 --> 00:06:34,229 - Honestly, I'd be down. [laughs] 185 00:06:34,229 --> 00:06:36,314 Isn't it crazy, seeing a whole group of us? 186 00:06:36,314 --> 00:06:39,901 - Yeah. Everyone here is so... mystical. 187 00:06:39,901 --> 00:06:41,945 I feel like I don't really look the part. 188 00:06:41,945 --> 00:06:43,905 - Oh, I always feel like that. I'm just used to being 189 00:06:43,905 --> 00:06:46,241 the weirdo in my friend group who gets random energy flashes 190 00:06:46,241 --> 00:06:47,993 at the supermarket. - Right? 191 00:06:47,993 --> 00:06:49,536 I have had some low moments 192 00:06:49,536 --> 00:06:51,746 in the candy aisle. On multiple levels. 193 00:06:51,746 --> 00:06:53,707 [laughs] [bell ringing] 194 00:06:53,707 --> 00:06:56,001 [party chatter] 195 00:06:56,001 --> 00:06:58,753 - Good evening! I'm Julius Moon. 196 00:06:58,753 --> 00:07:01,131 Welcome to this year's psychic gathering. 197 00:07:01,131 --> 00:07:03,508 This is a rarefied group of mystics, 198 00:07:03,508 --> 00:07:05,594 and it's an honor to have you all present. 199 00:07:05,594 --> 00:07:07,804 To kick us off tonight. I planned a special game 200 00:07:07,804 --> 00:07:10,390 to get the conversation flowing. 201 00:07:10,390 --> 00:07:11,558 Would you like to play? 202 00:07:11,558 --> 00:07:12,934 ALL: Yes! 203 00:07:12,934 --> 00:07:15,270 - This being LA, I've hired an actor, 204 00:07:15,270 --> 00:07:18,481 who is standing in this very room right now, 205 00:07:18,481 --> 00:07:20,859 pretending to be psychic. [all gasp] 206 00:07:20,859 --> 00:07:23,570 Using every form of perception you have, 207 00:07:23,570 --> 00:07:26,615 can you identify the decoy and prove yourself 208 00:07:26,615 --> 00:07:29,409 to be the most powerful psychic here? 209 00:07:29,409 --> 00:07:30,535 [murmuring] 210 00:07:30,535 --> 00:07:31,745 Let the hunt begin! 211 00:07:31,745 --> 00:07:34,331 [applause, cheering] 212 00:07:34,331 --> 00:07:35,957 ♪ 213 00:07:37,959 --> 00:07:39,961 ♪ 214 00:07:39,961 --> 00:07:42,881 - So if you're psychic, how do you spend the solstice? 215 00:07:42,881 --> 00:07:45,926 - Um, stuck in traffic usually. 216 00:07:45,926 --> 00:07:46,843 [both laugh] 217 00:07:46,843 --> 00:07:48,053 So, how long have you been a medium? 218 00:07:48,053 --> 00:07:49,554 - At least seven lifetimes. 219 00:07:49,554 --> 00:07:51,556 - That's very cool. 220 00:07:52,349 --> 00:07:53,850 I'm sorry. You have something on your... 221 00:07:53,850 --> 00:07:55,602 Do you mind if I just... - Okay. 222 00:07:56,937 --> 00:07:58,897 NARRATOR: [on tape] If you are listening to this audiobook, 223 00:07:58,897 --> 00:08:01,983 then you, or someone you know, hates their mother. 224 00:08:02,984 --> 00:08:05,820 - Ah, couldn't get it. [laughs] 225 00:08:05,820 --> 00:08:07,739 Well, see you in the next lifetime. 226 00:08:07,739 --> 00:08:09,241 ♪ 227 00:08:09,241 --> 00:08:10,659 - Number eight. 228 00:08:12,202 --> 00:08:14,204 - That's a beautiful ring. 229 00:08:14,663 --> 00:08:17,540 - I foresee the death of every man I meet. 230 00:08:17,540 --> 00:08:20,544 It's why I wear black every day and only dine at the Ritz. 231 00:08:20,544 --> 00:08:22,963 [crow cawing] 232 00:08:24,089 --> 00:08:27,092 I found it in the seat cushion on a Southwest flight. 233 00:08:27,092 --> 00:08:28,969 - Score. 234 00:08:28,969 --> 00:08:29,970 ♪ 235 00:08:29,970 --> 00:08:31,263 - Oh, what about Eric, huh? 236 00:08:31,263 --> 00:08:33,265 He looks friendly. BEN: Oh, yeah. 237 00:08:33,265 --> 00:08:35,225 I like his big tattoo that says "family." 238 00:08:35,225 --> 00:08:36,768 [Amy laughs] - Oh, I know this guy. 239 00:08:36,768 --> 00:08:39,187 We matched on a different app, messaged for three months, 240 00:08:39,187 --> 00:08:40,355 and then never went on a date. 241 00:08:40,355 --> 00:08:42,023 - Yeah, come on. Louise can do better than him. 242 00:08:42,023 --> 00:08:44,359 - But he met Henry Winkler. 243 00:08:45,193 --> 00:08:47,404 - Oh! He's hot! [murmuring] 244 00:08:47,404 --> 00:08:48,947 - Yes, yes, yes. 245 00:08:48,947 --> 00:08:50,865 - Sailing, crypto, CEO? 246 00:08:50,865 --> 00:08:52,659 What do you think? - Eh... 247 00:08:52,659 --> 00:08:54,369 Sort of seems like the Holy Trinity of jerks. 248 00:08:54,369 --> 00:08:55,370 - What? 249 00:08:55,370 --> 00:08:57,455 No, he literally wrote, "I'm a great guy. 250 00:08:57,455 --> 00:09:00,292 Fun, in-shape girls only." I'm saying yes. 251 00:09:00,292 --> 00:09:02,711 - What? - Oh, wait. What's on your profile? 252 00:09:02,711 --> 00:09:04,796 Can I see your pics? - Yeah, go ahead. Take a look. 253 00:09:04,796 --> 00:09:06,631 They're not, like, professional. 254 00:09:06,631 --> 00:09:09,467 Why does everyone have professional pics? DAVE: Yeah. 255 00:09:10,010 --> 00:09:13,305 JESSIE: Yeah... Can I make a suggestion? 256 00:09:13,305 --> 00:09:16,766 I just don't see these attracting the right kind of guy. 257 00:09:16,766 --> 00:09:18,435 - Oh. 258 00:09:18,435 --> 00:09:20,020 Uh... 259 00:09:20,020 --> 00:09:22,105 Okay, what was the suggestion? 260 00:09:22,105 --> 00:09:24,566 - There we go. Elegant, in charge, 261 00:09:24,566 --> 00:09:26,192 professional. This is you. 262 00:09:26,192 --> 00:09:29,446 - Are you sure this is the look? What do you guys think? 263 00:09:30,322 --> 00:09:32,657 - Gorge. Pure Louise. - Yeah. Really nice. Fantastic. 264 00:09:32,657 --> 00:09:34,034 ♪ 265 00:09:34,034 --> 00:09:35,368 - Okay! 266 00:09:35,368 --> 00:09:37,287 [squeals] Smile for me. [shutter snaps] 267 00:09:37,287 --> 00:09:38,830 [giggles] 268 00:09:38,830 --> 00:09:40,040 - Think female governor. 269 00:09:40,040 --> 00:09:41,082 - Okay. 270 00:09:41,082 --> 00:09:42,375 ♪ Keep moving ♪ 271 00:09:42,375 --> 00:09:44,252 [shutter snaps] [impressed murmuring] 272 00:09:44,252 --> 00:09:46,504 I'd vote for that. - Very nice, Louise. 273 00:09:46,504 --> 00:09:48,673 JESSIE: Incredible. Very smart. [shutter snapping] 274 00:09:49,132 --> 00:09:51,509 ANGEL: You can read my mind. I know you can. 275 00:09:51,509 --> 00:09:52,969 [laughing] 276 00:09:52,969 --> 00:09:54,012 - Angel! 277 00:09:54,012 --> 00:09:55,513 - Ooh, how's it going? 278 00:09:55,513 --> 00:09:56,973 - This game is so hard. 279 00:09:56,973 --> 00:09:59,517 My visions really aren't helping me figure out who the fake is. 280 00:09:59,517 --> 00:10:01,895 - What about your new friend, Flonase? 281 00:10:01,895 --> 00:10:03,188 - If you're making that joke, 282 00:10:03,188 --> 00:10:05,440 you obviously know her name is Allegra, 283 00:10:05,440 --> 00:10:08,151 and she is the real deal. She reads auras. 284 00:10:08,151 --> 00:10:09,569 - Are you sure about that? 285 00:10:09,569 --> 00:10:10,737 - Mm-hmm. Ooh! 286 00:10:10,737 --> 00:10:12,948 Ooh! Ooh! That's the woman who ignored me at the bar. 287 00:10:12,948 --> 00:10:14,366 [gasps] Maybe it's her. 288 00:10:14,366 --> 00:10:15,742 - Ooh. Go, go, go, go, go. 289 00:10:15,742 --> 00:10:17,744 [party chatter] 290 00:10:17,744 --> 00:10:19,246 - Oh, so sorry. 291 00:10:20,372 --> 00:10:23,708 - If you touch my shawl again, I will kill you. 292 00:10:31,841 --> 00:10:33,176 - Okay, she's very legit. 293 00:10:34,594 --> 00:10:36,471 - No way he's six-one. 294 00:10:36,471 --> 00:10:38,682 BEN: See you, Jonathan. JESSIE: Hate that hat. 295 00:10:38,682 --> 00:10:39,683 - See you, Taylor. 296 00:10:39,683 --> 00:10:41,434 JESSIE: Oh, he needs a hat! 297 00:10:41,434 --> 00:10:42,394 - See you, Thomas. 298 00:10:43,019 --> 00:10:44,271 AMY: [gasps] Oh no. 299 00:10:44,813 --> 00:10:46,356 LOUISE: Uh-oh. 300 00:10:46,773 --> 00:10:48,900 - Mm... - Oh. Oh dear. 301 00:10:49,276 --> 00:10:51,486 - Oh, that obviously wasn't supposed to happen. 302 00:10:52,696 --> 00:10:54,155 - Would you like to explain? 303 00:10:54,155 --> 00:10:56,491 - I mean, yeah. I'm not on here. 304 00:10:56,491 --> 00:10:58,785 I created a profile when we broke up. 305 00:10:58,785 --> 00:11:01,788 I went on this one horrible date with this girl named Katharine, 306 00:11:01,788 --> 00:11:03,290 who's never tried ketchup. 307 00:11:03,290 --> 00:11:05,333 But, I deleted the app 308 00:11:05,333 --> 00:11:07,168 when we got back together, 309 00:11:07,168 --> 00:11:09,796 so I have no idea why this is on here. LOUISE: Mm, yeah. 310 00:11:09,796 --> 00:11:11,631 You got to delete your account, 311 00:11:11,631 --> 00:11:13,508 not just the app. That's how they got you, 312 00:11:13,508 --> 00:11:14,509 so... 313 00:11:15,802 --> 00:11:18,179 - [laughs] Ben, LA. 314 00:11:18,179 --> 00:11:20,348 "I'm just a guy standing in front of a girl, 315 00:11:20,348 --> 00:11:23,727 asking her to DM him her fave one-hit wonder." 316 00:11:23,727 --> 00:11:25,395 - I think we can, like, swipe left... 317 00:11:25,395 --> 00:11:28,690 - "Teachin', beachin', and tearing it up in the keetchen." 318 00:11:28,690 --> 00:11:29,733 [laughter] 319 00:11:29,733 --> 00:11:31,985 - I've never felt more naked in my life. 320 00:11:31,985 --> 00:11:33,236 I'm gonna grab another drink. 321 00:11:33,236 --> 00:11:35,405 - From the keetchen? [laughter] 322 00:11:35,405 --> 00:11:37,365 LOUISE: You know, in his defense, 323 00:11:37,365 --> 00:11:39,826 rhyming's really big on here. At least it's not as bad as 324 00:11:39,826 --> 00:11:41,786 "fluent in sarcasm." 325 00:11:41,786 --> 00:11:43,246 [ding] AMY: Oh. Okay, guys. Shh. 326 00:11:43,246 --> 00:11:46,291 Couples therapy later. We have got a match. 327 00:11:46,291 --> 00:11:47,667 It's Nate! 328 00:11:47,667 --> 00:11:49,169 [Louise groans] JESSIE: The CEO? 329 00:11:49,169 --> 00:11:51,630 - Oh my god! This is such a rush. We have to message him. 330 00:11:51,630 --> 00:11:53,173 [typing] "Uh, hi. 331 00:11:53,173 --> 00:11:54,049 LOL." 332 00:11:54,049 --> 00:11:56,968 [laughs] "I'm an entrepreneur 333 00:11:56,968 --> 00:11:58,595 in the wellness space." 334 00:11:58,595 --> 00:12:01,056 - Yeah, I'm just a yoga instructor. 335 00:12:01,056 --> 00:12:03,475 I'm not trying to scam people. - I'm just making sure you pop. 336 00:12:03,475 --> 00:12:04,851 This guy is, like, my ideal man. 337 00:12:04,851 --> 00:12:06,478 [typing] - Really? 338 00:12:06,478 --> 00:12:07,812 [stops typing] 339 00:12:08,897 --> 00:12:10,440 - For Louise. 340 00:12:11,483 --> 00:12:13,610 - Really? - Yep. 341 00:12:13,610 --> 00:12:16,613 ♪ soft music ♪ 342 00:12:16,613 --> 00:12:19,574 [party chatter] 343 00:12:22,118 --> 00:12:23,411 - Better not be you. 344 00:12:23,411 --> 00:12:24,704 Is it? 345 00:12:24,704 --> 00:12:27,499 - Excuse you. I am a full-time psychic. 346 00:12:27,499 --> 00:12:29,751 How do I know you're not the actor? - I wish. 347 00:12:29,751 --> 00:12:32,754 Not being a psychic would make my life a lot easier. 348 00:12:33,755 --> 00:12:36,675 I saw my parents' divorce eight years before it happened. 349 00:12:36,675 --> 00:12:38,510 - Oh, I'm sorry. 350 00:12:38,510 --> 00:12:41,137 That must have been really hard. [zap] 351 00:12:41,513 --> 00:12:44,140 - Hey, I am James. I'm 34 years old, 352 00:12:44,140 --> 00:12:47,686 and I'll be reading for the role of Sexy Zombie Number Three. 353 00:12:47,686 --> 00:12:49,271 - [gasps] It is you! 354 00:12:49,271 --> 00:12:50,772 You are the actor! 355 00:12:50,772 --> 00:12:52,899 Yes! - Oh, come on. 356 00:12:52,899 --> 00:12:54,818 If I get found out, I don't get paid. 357 00:12:54,818 --> 00:12:55,652 - Oh. 358 00:12:55,652 --> 00:12:57,153 - I-I knew it was you. 359 00:12:57,153 --> 00:12:58,655 [gasping] You're the fake! 360 00:12:58,655 --> 00:12:59,864 - What the hell, man? 361 00:12:59,864 --> 00:13:01,575 - Yeah, she is the actor. 362 00:13:01,575 --> 00:13:02,951 - I had a feeling. 363 00:13:02,951 --> 00:13:05,203 She doesn't even celebrate the solstice. 364 00:13:05,203 --> 00:13:07,205 - What? No, that... [murmuring] 365 00:13:07,205 --> 00:13:09,291 He is the actor. 366 00:13:09,291 --> 00:13:10,208 I just saw it! 367 00:13:10,208 --> 00:13:12,127 - You lied to me? - No. 368 00:13:12,127 --> 00:13:13,545 - I knew it. 369 00:13:13,545 --> 00:13:15,338 I could tell she was forcing it all night. 370 00:13:15,797 --> 00:13:17,215 She even said she was worried about 371 00:13:17,215 --> 00:13:20,343 "looking the part." She's clearly not one of us. 372 00:13:20,343 --> 00:13:21,344 [gasps] 373 00:13:22,804 --> 00:13:25,807 ♪ 374 00:13:25,807 --> 00:13:26,808 [scoffs] 375 00:13:26,808 --> 00:13:29,811 [crowd murmuring] 376 00:13:29,811 --> 00:13:32,314 [spraying] 377 00:13:34,774 --> 00:13:37,235 ♪ soft music ♪ 378 00:13:37,235 --> 00:13:38,778 [laughs] AMY: Ooh, Louise! 379 00:13:38,778 --> 00:13:41,907 You and Nate are having a real back-and-forth going on over here. 380 00:13:41,907 --> 00:13:45,076 - "Is that a carp you're holding in your photo?" 381 00:13:45,076 --> 00:13:47,370 - Oh, what's a carp? 382 00:13:47,370 --> 00:13:49,956 Oh. Okay, I was hoping it wasn't a fish. 383 00:13:49,956 --> 00:13:52,000 - Uh, maybe you should tell him about Louise's dog. 384 00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:55,253 - Maybe you should call Katharine and go have some dry French fries. 385 00:13:55,253 --> 00:13:56,880 Oh! Nate lives 386 00:13:56,880 --> 00:13:59,674 two blocks away. We have to invite him over, right? 387 00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:02,260 - We're gonna judge him like American Idol. 388 00:14:02,260 --> 00:14:05,639 - Uh, yeah. I can leave if you guys want... 389 00:14:05,639 --> 00:14:08,433 - No, no. What are you talking about? We need you. You're the you. 390 00:14:08,433 --> 00:14:09,809 JESSIE: Yeah! 391 00:14:09,809 --> 00:14:12,646 [muffled party chatter] 392 00:14:12,646 --> 00:14:14,356 [sighs] 393 00:14:14,356 --> 00:14:17,359 ♪ 394 00:14:21,863 --> 00:14:24,699 [dialing] JESSIE: [on phone] Hi! It's Jessie. 395 00:14:24,699 --> 00:14:25,784 You're on speaker with everyone. 396 00:14:25,784 --> 00:14:27,410 - How is your psychic thing? 397 00:14:27,410 --> 00:14:30,247 - Um... I-it ended early. I-- 398 00:14:31,039 --> 00:14:33,124 Please tell me you guys are doing something fun right now. 399 00:14:33,124 --> 00:14:35,919 - Well, I'm about to have a first date in front of everybody. 400 00:14:35,919 --> 00:14:37,254 Yeah. Aren't you jealous? 401 00:14:37,254 --> 00:14:38,922 - Come join us at Amy and Dave's. 402 00:14:38,922 --> 00:14:41,758 - Yeah, but no spoilers. We don't need a psychic giving everything away. 403 00:14:41,758 --> 00:14:44,719 JESSIE: Yeah, don't ruin it for me. I have a lot riding on this. 404 00:14:44,719 --> 00:14:46,263 - Um [laughs], you know what? 405 00:14:46,263 --> 00:14:49,599 I actually just realized... how tired I am, 406 00:14:49,599 --> 00:14:52,561 so, um, think I'm just going to go straight to bed. 407 00:14:52,561 --> 00:14:55,021 I'm sorry. Hope he's the one. 408 00:14:55,021 --> 00:14:56,940 - Lame! - Party pooper. 409 00:14:56,940 --> 00:14:59,526 [booing, laughter] VARIOUS: Bye. Bye! 410 00:14:59,526 --> 00:15:01,570 ♪ 411 00:15:09,202 --> 00:15:10,328 - Hm... - Ooh. 412 00:15:10,328 --> 00:15:11,830 Got it. "Weg." 413 00:15:11,830 --> 00:15:13,999 - "Weg"? What's that? What's "weg"? 414 00:15:13,999 --> 00:15:16,543 - It is seven-point word. - No, it-- No, it's not. 415 00:15:16,543 --> 00:15:18,086 Just 'cause the numbers are on it. 416 00:15:18,086 --> 00:15:19,754 "Weg" is not a word. MARIA: You came! 417 00:15:20,463 --> 00:15:21,464 Maggie. 418 00:15:21,464 --> 00:15:23,133 Oh, thank God you're safe. 419 00:15:23,133 --> 00:15:24,843 Why didn't you text back? 420 00:15:25,468 --> 00:15:28,471 Listen, I have been worried sick about you. 421 00:15:28,471 --> 00:15:29,973 These cults, they brand people... 422 00:15:29,973 --> 00:15:31,808 - Uh, honey, 423 00:15:31,808 --> 00:15:33,560 why don't you come into the kitchen with me 424 00:15:33,560 --> 00:15:35,228 and help me find my favorite mug? 425 00:15:35,228 --> 00:15:38,148 You know, the one that says, "If you can read this, you're too close"? 426 00:15:38,148 --> 00:15:40,150 Please? Come on. 427 00:15:41,026 --> 00:15:42,652 MARIA: Your mug can't wait? 428 00:15:42,652 --> 00:15:45,280 I have questions for our daughter! [doorbell rings] 429 00:15:45,280 --> 00:15:48,074 - Oh! He's here! You guys, he's here! - Louise, go answer it! 430 00:15:48,074 --> 00:15:49,576 LOUISE: It's not even my house! 431 00:15:49,576 --> 00:15:51,161 DAVE: Okay, yeah. JESSIE: Fluff the pillows. 432 00:15:51,161 --> 00:15:52,579 AMY: Okay. DAVE: Okay, okay. 433 00:15:52,579 --> 00:15:53,788 JESSIE: Fluff the pillows. 434 00:15:53,788 --> 00:15:56,249 Karate chop, please. AMY: Ben, settle down. 435 00:15:57,751 --> 00:15:58,919 LOUISE: Hi! NATE: Hi! 436 00:15:58,919 --> 00:16:01,004 LOUISE: [laughs] Come in. 437 00:16:01,004 --> 00:16:03,131 Yep, you're in the right place. [door shuts] 438 00:16:03,131 --> 00:16:07,010 Uh, welcome to this... house. 439 00:16:07,636 --> 00:16:08,678 - Nate. Ben. 440 00:16:08,678 --> 00:16:11,431 - Hey, Ben. [nervous laugh] Hey, everyone. 441 00:16:11,431 --> 00:16:13,141 AMY: Hi. - Hey. 442 00:16:13,141 --> 00:16:14,935 - Uh, what is all this? 443 00:16:15,644 --> 00:16:17,312 - Oh, yeah. These are my-- 444 00:16:17,312 --> 00:16:18,313 - Siblings. 445 00:16:19,189 --> 00:16:21,024 - Uh, and we were just in the middle of-- 446 00:16:21,024 --> 00:16:22,692 - Talking about how we have the same mum. 447 00:16:22,692 --> 00:16:24,527 - Yeah. JESSIE: Uh, please! 448 00:16:24,527 --> 00:16:27,113 Have a seat! We have heard so much about you. 449 00:16:27,113 --> 00:16:29,241 - You have? [nervous laugh] 450 00:16:29,241 --> 00:16:30,784 [sighs] 451 00:16:31,159 --> 00:16:34,204 I gotta say you really look like your photos. 452 00:16:34,704 --> 00:16:35,997 Like, exactly. 453 00:16:35,997 --> 00:16:37,207 - Oh. BEN: Oh. 454 00:16:37,207 --> 00:16:40,252 - [nervous laugh] Did you just take these photos? 455 00:16:41,211 --> 00:16:42,837 - You know, I can't do this. 456 00:16:42,837 --> 00:16:43,838 Uh... 457 00:16:44,464 --> 00:16:46,633 Nate? This is not a match. 458 00:16:46,633 --> 00:16:49,261 Um, Jesse, thanks for trying, but it's a no. 459 00:16:49,261 --> 00:16:51,012 - It's okay. We can keep looking. 460 00:16:51,012 --> 00:16:52,013 LOUISE: No, don't. Alright? 461 00:16:52,013 --> 00:16:54,558 This was just not as fun as I thought it was gonna be. 462 00:16:54,558 --> 00:16:56,184 Online dating never is. 463 00:16:56,184 --> 00:16:59,479 I'm sick of trying to impress people that I've never even met. 464 00:16:59,479 --> 00:17:01,648 You know, it makes me feel bad about myself, 465 00:17:01,648 --> 00:17:04,442 and hot people shouldn't feel bad about themselves. 466 00:17:04,442 --> 00:17:05,902 - No... - Nope. Nope. 467 00:17:05,902 --> 00:17:08,405 - I'm tired of trying to force this, okay? 468 00:17:08,405 --> 00:17:11,032 I need a break, so I'm deleting the apps. 469 00:17:11,032 --> 00:17:13,326 - Well, make sure you delete the account as well, 470 00:17:13,326 --> 00:17:15,495 so your girlfriend doesn't get mad at you. 471 00:17:16,413 --> 00:17:19,165 - I still can't believe you online dated, and I didn't. 472 00:17:19,165 --> 00:17:20,750 Like, what else don't I know? 473 00:17:20,750 --> 00:17:22,878 - What else don't I know? I didn't know your type was a... 474 00:17:23,753 --> 00:17:24,921 business bro. 475 00:17:24,921 --> 00:17:25,839 - Wait, 476 00:17:26,590 --> 00:17:27,591 was I talking to you? 477 00:17:27,591 --> 00:17:28,800 - Yeah, that was me. 478 00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:29,968 - And you two are together? 479 00:17:29,968 --> 00:17:31,344 - Yeah, we are. 480 00:17:32,012 --> 00:17:33,346 NATE: Huh. 481 00:17:34,472 --> 00:17:36,558 I'm gonna go. - You should go now. 482 00:17:37,100 --> 00:17:38,935 LOUISE: Thanks for coming by. NATE: Sure. 483 00:17:38,935 --> 00:17:42,105 - Oh, actually, do you have a favorite Albert Finney movie? 484 00:17:42,105 --> 00:17:43,648 - Who's Albert Finney? 485 00:17:43,648 --> 00:17:45,650 - Yeah, you can go. Right this way. 486 00:17:46,818 --> 00:17:50,614 - You're going to lose her if you interrogate her like that. 487 00:17:50,614 --> 00:17:52,073 Don't scare her off. 488 00:17:52,782 --> 00:17:54,659 No sudden movements. 489 00:17:54,659 --> 00:17:58,204 You got to approach her cautiously, respectfully. 490 00:17:58,204 --> 00:17:59,581 Like she's a cat. 491 00:17:59,581 --> 00:18:01,082 - Oh, Jack. 492 00:18:01,082 --> 00:18:02,500 Seriously? - Here. 493 00:18:03,084 --> 00:18:04,586 Offer her a treat. 494 00:18:07,088 --> 00:18:08,131 Hm? 495 00:18:21,478 --> 00:18:22,979 - You okay, sweetie? 496 00:18:25,732 --> 00:18:27,567 - Not really. - Oh... 497 00:18:28,902 --> 00:18:30,320 [Maria groans] 498 00:18:30,320 --> 00:18:31,321 [sighs] 499 00:18:32,322 --> 00:18:36,076 - Sometimes, I feel like I just don't really belong to a group, 500 00:18:36,076 --> 00:18:37,577 you know? Like... 501 00:18:39,037 --> 00:18:41,248 Like, I'm... I'm either too normal 502 00:18:41,248 --> 00:18:43,500 or not normal enough. 503 00:18:45,085 --> 00:18:46,294 It hurts. 504 00:18:46,294 --> 00:18:48,463 - What about your friends downstairs? 505 00:18:48,463 --> 00:18:49,673 That's a little group. 506 00:18:49,673 --> 00:18:52,050 Louise, Ben, and Jessie... 507 00:18:52,050 --> 00:18:53,802 That other... couple. 508 00:18:53,802 --> 00:18:55,220 - Yeah. 509 00:18:55,220 --> 00:18:57,013 I love them. They're great, but... 510 00:18:59,683 --> 00:19:01,059 It's awkward with Ben. 511 00:19:01,685 --> 00:19:03,937 Before Ben and Jessie got back together, 512 00:19:03,937 --> 00:19:05,438 Ben and I... 513 00:19:06,064 --> 00:19:08,942 had a little thing for a minute, and... 514 00:19:09,776 --> 00:19:10,986 I really liked him. 515 00:19:14,281 --> 00:19:16,658 Maybe I still do. 516 00:19:18,785 --> 00:19:20,537 - Listen, I cannot begin to know 517 00:19:20,537 --> 00:19:22,747 what it's like to move through the world like you. 518 00:19:22,747 --> 00:19:23,957 ♪ 519 00:19:23,957 --> 00:19:26,835 What I do know is that there is one place 520 00:19:26,835 --> 00:19:29,337 where no one is normal 521 00:19:29,337 --> 00:19:30,714 and you fit right in. 522 00:19:30,714 --> 00:19:31,715 [laughs] 523 00:19:34,009 --> 00:19:36,303 - You always know what I need, don't you? - Mm. 524 00:19:36,303 --> 00:19:37,804 - Maybe you are psychic. 525 00:19:37,804 --> 00:19:40,307 [both laugh] 526 00:19:41,975 --> 00:19:42,976 - You want some more treats? 527 00:19:42,976 --> 00:19:44,477 - Yes, please. - Mm. 528 00:19:44,477 --> 00:19:45,937 Jack! 529 00:19:45,937 --> 00:19:48,899 Do we still have that tin of popcorn that we were gonna give the mailman, 530 00:19:48,899 --> 00:19:50,692 but never got around to it at Christmas? 531 00:19:50,692 --> 00:19:52,986 - [sighs] Two steps ahead of you, honey. 532 00:19:52,986 --> 00:19:54,654 I finished it off last week. 533 00:19:54,654 --> 00:19:57,157 - Dad... JACK: Oh... 534 00:19:57,157 --> 00:20:00,160 ♪ 535 00:20:05,373 --> 00:20:07,375 [all sigh] 536 00:20:10,170 --> 00:20:11,755 - I'm sorry, does that say "weg"? 537 00:20:11,755 --> 00:20:14,132 - Yes, it's a word. Don't question it. 538 00:20:16,134 --> 00:20:17,469 ♪ 539 00:20:17,469 --> 00:20:19,763 - I'd love to show you the tile in my foyer. 540 00:20:19,763 --> 00:20:21,181 - Is it hand laid? 541 00:20:21,181 --> 00:20:24,309 - Of course, it is. Shall we head out to my loft? 542 00:20:24,309 --> 00:20:25,685 - Yes. 543 00:20:27,604 --> 00:20:31,524 - He's got a husband, and the tiles are peel and stick. 544 00:20:31,524 --> 00:20:32,859 [gasps] 545 00:20:35,195 --> 00:20:36,821 - Excuse me. 546 00:20:37,572 --> 00:20:39,616 You are chic. I'm obsessed. 547 00:20:39,616 --> 00:20:41,534 We're getting a drink. 548 00:20:41,534 --> 00:20:43,995 - I know. [Angel gasps] 549 00:20:43,995 --> 00:20:44,996 [clink] 550 00:20:44,996 --> 00:20:47,999 ♪