1 00:00:13,389 --> 00:00:16,350 - * Cowards and heroes, listen my friends * 2 00:00:16,392 --> 00:00:20,480 * If you have money or nothing to spend * 3 00:00:20,521 --> 00:00:21,689 * It'll make no difference * 4 00:00:21,731 --> 00:00:25,193 - That's what I'm talking about. 5 00:00:25,234 --> 00:00:27,945 - * Sooner or later * 6 00:00:27,987 --> 00:00:31,449 - Where'd it go? It never came out. 7 00:00:31,491 --> 00:00:35,578 - * We all make the little flowers grow * 8 00:00:35,620 --> 00:00:38,081 * * 9 00:00:38,122 --> 00:00:39,999 * Wise men and fools * 10 00:00:40,041 --> 00:00:41,501 - Here we go. 11 00:00:41,542 --> 00:00:42,418 [groans] 12 00:00:42,460 --> 00:00:44,045 - Dad! - Fuck! 13 00:00:44,087 --> 00:00:45,380 Fucking fuck! - Dad! 14 00:00:45,421 --> 00:00:47,382 - Somebody help me! Fuck! - Somebody please help! 15 00:00:47,423 --> 00:00:48,591 - Somebody help me! 16 00:00:48,633 --> 00:00:50,843 Somebody help me! [screaming] 17 00:00:50,885 --> 00:00:53,262 - Somebody please help! - [screaming] 18 00:00:53,304 --> 00:00:57,892 - * We all make the little flowers grow * 19 00:00:57,934 --> 00:00:59,560 - I don't get it. 20 00:00:59,602 --> 00:01:01,396 If there's 100,000 pythons in the Everglades, 21 00:01:01,437 --> 00:01:03,898 where the fuck are they all? 22 00:01:03,940 --> 00:01:05,650 [sighs] 23 00:01:05,691 --> 00:01:07,944 Hello, Jillian, why you on the phone? 24 00:01:07,985 --> 00:01:09,737 Focus up. - I'm very focused. 25 00:01:09,779 --> 00:01:11,489 It's just that I'm getting all these texts from this guy, 26 00:01:11,531 --> 00:01:13,241 Nate, who I met at Dominine. 27 00:01:13,282 --> 00:01:16,327 I don't know how to respond. 28 00:01:16,369 --> 00:01:19,372 - "Where'd you go?" "Did I do something wrong?" 29 00:01:19,414 --> 00:01:20,832 Jillian, did you ghost this dude? 30 00:01:20,873 --> 00:01:23,668 - Yes, but only because he's handsome and rich, 31 00:01:23,710 --> 00:01:26,879 and he thought I was rich, too, for some weird reason. 32 00:01:26,921 --> 00:01:28,256 Probably because I said I was. 33 00:01:28,297 --> 00:01:29,716 - Good. You made the right call. 34 00:01:29,757 --> 00:01:32,844 You can't start a relationship on a foundation of lies. 35 00:01:32,885 --> 00:01:36,180 Lying always ends bad. 36 00:01:36,222 --> 00:01:38,599 - Yes, you're right, definitely. 37 00:01:38,641 --> 00:01:40,768 But have you seen the movie, "Maid in Manhattan"? 38 00:01:40,810 --> 00:01:43,938 J-Lo lies to Ralph Fiennes, and they still end up together. 39 00:01:43,980 --> 00:01:46,774 Plus, all of her maid friends get promoted to management. 40 00:01:46,816 --> 00:01:49,736 - Yeah, that's J-Lo. You're not J-Lo. 41 00:01:49,777 --> 00:01:53,281 Okay, you're J--actually, I don't know your last name. 42 00:01:53,322 --> 00:01:55,366 - It's Glopp, like the sound lotion makes 43 00:01:55,408 --> 00:01:56,784 when it hits the floor. 44 00:01:56,826 --> 00:02:00,455 - Uh, yeah, I don't see things working out for J-Glopp. 45 00:02:00,496 --> 00:02:02,248 - You mad at me about something? 46 00:02:02,290 --> 00:02:05,293 - What? 47 00:02:05,334 --> 00:02:09,213 No, no, I'm sorry. I don't know who I'm mad at. 48 00:02:09,255 --> 00:02:10,798 Honestly, I thought this Rita Gaines thing 49 00:02:10,840 --> 00:02:12,592 would work out, and we wouldn't have to be back out here. 50 00:02:12,633 --> 00:02:15,553 - Fuck Rita Gaines. I hope she gains weight. 51 00:02:15,595 --> 00:02:17,305 - Come on, don't be fatphobic. 52 00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:18,473 - You're right, I'm sorry. 53 00:02:18,514 --> 00:02:21,726 I hope she gains cancer? 54 00:02:21,768 --> 00:02:23,311 - That's much worse. 55 00:02:23,352 --> 00:02:25,146 - I hope she gains a little decency. 56 00:02:25,188 --> 00:02:27,148 - Would you two shut the fuck up? 57 00:02:27,190 --> 00:02:30,318 - The fuck? - Huh? 58 00:02:30,359 --> 00:02:31,527 - What's happening? - What the fuck? 59 00:02:31,569 --> 00:02:33,196 - I mean... - Who the fuck is this? 60 00:02:33,237 --> 00:02:37,325 - Damn it. You scared all the snakes off. 61 00:02:37,366 --> 00:02:38,826 - What the fuck are you wearing? 62 00:02:38,868 --> 00:02:40,620 - It's a ghillie suit. 63 00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:42,497 - Well, I like the name, very cute. 64 00:02:42,538 --> 00:02:44,082 - No, there's nothing cute about this, 65 00:02:44,123 --> 00:02:46,501 unless you think it is cute to dress like a U.S. Navy SEAL. 66 00:02:46,542 --> 00:02:48,378 - I think it's cute to dress up like a tree. 67 00:02:48,419 --> 00:02:50,838 - I bet it's a fun way to feed the birds. 68 00:02:50,880 --> 00:02:53,216 - It's camo, all right? It breaks up my silhouette. 69 00:02:53,257 --> 00:02:54,550 Makes me invisible to the prey. 70 00:02:54,592 --> 00:02:56,344 - Dad, do I have to wear this thing? 71 00:02:56,386 --> 00:02:57,428 It's a thousand degrees out here, 72 00:02:57,470 --> 00:02:58,846 and it smells like shit. 73 00:02:58,888 --> 00:03:01,391 - It smells fucking fine. - It smells like gasoline. 74 00:03:01,432 --> 00:03:02,725 - It's not gasoline. 75 00:03:02,767 --> 00:03:04,394 It's an expensive snake pheromone 76 00:03:04,435 --> 00:03:06,479 that I bought off a very reputable online dealer. 77 00:03:06,521 --> 00:03:08,398 The pythons find it alluring. 78 00:03:08,439 --> 00:03:10,191 People can't smell it. 79 00:03:10,233 --> 00:03:11,567 - Oh, I can definitely smell it. 80 00:03:11,609 --> 00:03:12,985 - Yeah, well, then you must be the one human being 81 00:03:13,027 --> 00:03:14,404 that can smell snake pheromone. 82 00:03:14,445 --> 00:03:15,488 So you should be in a fucking museum. 83 00:03:15,530 --> 00:03:17,281 - You got scammed, Dad. 84 00:03:17,323 --> 00:03:19,117 - Yeah, well, at least I didn't get a D in math, Corby. 85 00:03:19,158 --> 00:03:20,952 - Yeah, that's because I can never do my homework 86 00:03:20,993 --> 00:03:23,454 because I'm always editing your stupid videos. 87 00:03:23,496 --> 00:03:25,373 - I'm trying to set you up for life. 88 00:03:25,415 --> 00:03:26,749 Would you rather know geometry 89 00:03:26,791 --> 00:03:28,251 or be proficient in Adobe Premiere? 90 00:03:28,292 --> 00:03:29,544 - Math. - No one gives a shit 91 00:03:29,585 --> 00:03:31,671 about triangles anymore, Corby. 92 00:03:31,713 --> 00:03:33,089 Now, this is our snake territory. 93 00:03:33,131 --> 00:03:34,257 We called dibs. 94 00:03:34,298 --> 00:03:37,427 So go someplace else and fuck off. 95 00:03:37,468 --> 00:03:39,303 Suit up, son. 96 00:03:41,305 --> 00:03:42,265 - Bye. - Bye, Corby. 97 00:03:42,306 --> 00:03:44,434 Nice to see you. - Corby! 98 00:03:49,313 --> 00:03:50,314 - There's the fucking thief. 99 00:03:50,356 --> 00:03:51,983 - Well, fucking finally. 100 00:03:52,024 --> 00:03:53,484 It's been two days. 101 00:03:53,526 --> 00:03:55,278 All I had to eat were these Dominine brand energy bars. 102 00:03:55,319 --> 00:03:56,571 - Oh, you should be thanking me. 103 00:03:56,612 --> 00:03:58,406 Those things are gold. They're all I ever eat. 104 00:03:58,448 --> 00:04:00,241 And I never have to shit, like ever. 105 00:04:00,283 --> 00:04:01,451 - Seems dangerous. 106 00:04:01,492 --> 00:04:02,994 - What's dangerous is how much work 107 00:04:03,035 --> 00:04:04,912 I'm getting done while you're sitting on the can, 108 00:04:04,954 --> 00:04:07,165 wiping your fucking ass. 109 00:04:07,206 --> 00:04:08,791 Now, you stole from me, 110 00:04:08,833 --> 00:04:09,917 and I don't like being stolen from. 111 00:04:09,959 --> 00:04:10,835 - I ain't steal from you. 112 00:04:10,877 --> 00:04:12,170 I was conducting my own business. 113 00:04:12,211 --> 00:04:14,672 - Selling access to my fucking event. 114 00:04:14,714 --> 00:04:16,382 - This guy took all my shit when he tossed me in here. 115 00:04:16,424 --> 00:04:17,884 So you already have all the cash. 116 00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:20,803 - Yeah, the problem is you've been in here for 48 hours, 117 00:04:20,845 --> 00:04:23,431 while that money's been in Jarren's sweaty little pocket 118 00:04:23,473 --> 00:04:25,892 instead of in the markets making a return. 119 00:04:25,933 --> 00:04:27,518 And I don't know if you know this about me, 120 00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:29,687 but I make money make money. 121 00:04:29,729 --> 00:04:31,856 So you owe me interest, 122 00:04:31,898 --> 00:04:34,317 say 18%, 18% of... 123 00:04:34,358 --> 00:04:37,487 - 21,000. - [scoffs] 124 00:04:37,528 --> 00:04:41,449 - Holy shit, you made 21K selling wristbands? 125 00:04:41,491 --> 00:04:44,619 - Yeah, all it cost me was one $400 ticket. 126 00:04:44,660 --> 00:04:46,329 'Cause I don't know if you noticed about me, 127 00:04:46,370 --> 00:04:47,789 but I make money make money. 128 00:04:47,830 --> 00:04:49,499 - Hey that's Rodney's catch phrase. 129 00:04:49,540 --> 00:04:51,125 - Hey, at least he used it right, Jarren. 130 00:04:51,167 --> 00:04:52,668 - Sorry. - Don't apologize! 131 00:04:52,710 --> 00:04:54,629 Jesus Christ, have you read any of my books? 132 00:04:54,670 --> 00:04:57,131 - Yeah-- - Don't answer that. 133 00:04:57,173 --> 00:04:58,716 I know you have. 134 00:04:58,758 --> 00:05:00,468 You're obsessed with me, and it's fucking weird. 135 00:05:00,510 --> 00:05:03,388 Now, you got one day to get me my money. 136 00:05:06,349 --> 00:05:09,852 - Or else. 137 00:05:09,894 --> 00:05:11,938 - Motherfucker. 138 00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:15,817 The "or else" is implied by the silence, you dunce. 139 00:05:15,858 --> 00:05:18,861 You never add anything. You never fucking add anything. 140 00:05:18,903 --> 00:05:21,239 Fuck! Let's go! 141 00:05:21,280 --> 00:05:22,782 [door slams] 142 00:05:22,824 --> 00:05:24,700 - I just didn't think every relationship 143 00:05:24,742 --> 00:05:26,953 that starts with a lie is bad. 144 00:05:26,994 --> 00:05:28,663 We never would've become partners 145 00:05:28,704 --> 00:05:30,665 if I hadn't pretended I drove a Mercedes. 146 00:05:30,706 --> 00:05:32,375 - And yet here we are, 147 00:05:32,417 --> 00:05:34,669 tromping through the swamp empty-handed. 148 00:05:34,711 --> 00:05:36,921 Jury's still out on where this is headed. 149 00:05:36,963 --> 00:05:38,506 - Help! 150 00:05:38,548 --> 00:05:40,258 - Is that what's his name? - Corby. 151 00:05:40,299 --> 00:05:41,801 - Help! - [choking] 152 00:05:41,843 --> 00:05:43,636 - Please, come here! - Oh, shit! 153 00:05:43,678 --> 00:05:45,304 - Oh, my God! - The snake is choking him! 154 00:05:45,346 --> 00:05:47,181 - What happened? - Fuck, get it off. 155 00:05:47,223 --> 00:05:48,599 - Please help. - What happened? 156 00:05:48,641 --> 00:05:49,892 - We were laying down, and it just crawled in there. 157 00:05:49,934 --> 00:05:50,935 - I was invisible. 158 00:05:50,977 --> 00:05:52,520 It's 'cause I look like the swamp. 159 00:05:52,562 --> 00:05:53,938 - Hey, I'm gonna find the head. 160 00:05:53,980 --> 00:05:55,940 Oh, my God, it's going all the way around. 161 00:05:55,982 --> 00:05:57,734 - Here, use the bolt gun! - I got the head! 162 00:05:57,775 --> 00:05:59,610 Here's the head, it's here. It's by his waist! 163 00:05:59,652 --> 00:06:01,738 - Dad, Dad, Dad! - Hold still, hold still. 164 00:06:01,779 --> 00:06:03,656 - Don't shoot my dick off. 165 00:06:03,698 --> 00:06:07,744 - Dad! - [coughing] 166 00:06:09,829 --> 00:06:11,956 - Oh. 167 00:06:11,998 --> 00:06:14,542 - What the-- why are you in a thong? 168 00:06:14,584 --> 00:06:17,128 - 'Cause it's fucking hot in there. 169 00:06:17,170 --> 00:06:20,506 I'd be naked, but the suit chafes my penis. 170 00:06:20,548 --> 00:06:22,050 The suit you just put a hole in, by the way. 171 00:06:22,091 --> 00:06:23,092 Thanks for that. 172 00:06:23,134 --> 00:06:24,552 - Oh, sorry for saving your life. 173 00:06:24,594 --> 00:06:25,553 - Yeah, you didn't save my life. 174 00:06:25,595 --> 00:06:26,763 You ruined my take. 175 00:06:26,804 --> 00:06:28,556 I was pretending to be strangled. 176 00:06:28,598 --> 00:06:30,058 Build tension for the video. 177 00:06:30,099 --> 00:06:33,603 That's right, hot shot. Smile, 'cause you're on camera. 178 00:06:34,729 --> 00:06:37,565 Are you fucking serious? 179 00:06:37,607 --> 00:06:38,900 Where's the camera, Corby? 180 00:06:38,941 --> 00:06:40,443 - What? I dropped it. 181 00:06:40,485 --> 00:06:42,153 I got scared. - Did I call cut? 182 00:06:42,195 --> 00:06:43,529 - You weren't breathing. 183 00:06:43,571 --> 00:06:46,866 - Goddammit! That is method acting, son. 184 00:06:46,908 --> 00:06:48,117 You've done enough of these to know 185 00:06:48,159 --> 00:06:49,202 that's part of my process. 186 00:06:49,243 --> 00:06:52,413 It looks like you've peed yourself. 187 00:06:52,455 --> 00:06:54,165 - That's just snake pee. 188 00:06:54,207 --> 00:06:56,626 The snake peed on top of my penis when he got scared. 189 00:06:56,667 --> 00:06:58,461 - Right on top. 190 00:06:58,503 --> 00:06:59,921 - I'm sorry we ruined your video. 191 00:06:59,962 --> 00:07:03,091 Here you go. We'll just be taking our snake. 192 00:07:03,132 --> 00:07:04,842 - Like hell you will. It's my snake. 193 00:07:04,884 --> 00:07:06,260 - How? - But we killed it. 194 00:07:06,302 --> 00:07:08,054 - Yeah, well, I could've killed it any time I want to, 195 00:07:08,096 --> 00:07:10,348 but if I killed too easily, there's no story. 196 00:07:10,390 --> 00:07:11,974 And I'm a fucking storyteller. 197 00:07:12,016 --> 00:07:13,935 So sorry, tough shit, my snake. 198 00:07:13,976 --> 00:07:15,228 - Fuck it, look. 199 00:07:15,269 --> 00:07:18,106 We'll turn it in together and split it, all right? 200 00:07:18,147 --> 00:07:20,775 Just put some clothes on and clean the pee off yourself. 201 00:07:22,485 --> 00:07:23,611 - All right. 202 00:07:23,653 --> 00:07:26,030 - I don't drink. You know why? 203 00:07:26,072 --> 00:07:28,616 It's 'cause when guys go out, they go hit the clubs. 204 00:07:28,658 --> 00:07:30,284 They go to the bars. 205 00:07:30,326 --> 00:07:32,662 What they're telling the people around them is, 206 00:07:32,703 --> 00:07:35,039 "My job's done for the day." 207 00:07:35,081 --> 00:07:38,710 Well, fuck that. My work ain't ever done. 208 00:07:38,751 --> 00:07:42,213 - Yo, that dude is crazy, man. 209 00:07:42,255 --> 00:07:44,465 - Yeah, he dumb as hell, 210 00:07:44,507 --> 00:07:46,634 but he's rich as shit. 211 00:07:46,676 --> 00:07:48,845 - I'm like this. 212 00:07:50,012 --> 00:07:52,140 - Rich and dumb. 213 00:07:52,181 --> 00:07:54,809 A man can make some money off that combo. 214 00:07:54,851 --> 00:07:56,352 - That's not how the system works. 215 00:07:56,394 --> 00:07:57,770 I can't just split a snake. 216 00:07:57,812 --> 00:07:59,856 - It's 10 feet of snake. 217 00:07:59,897 --> 00:08:02,734 Five feet of snake for him, five feet of snake for us. 218 00:08:02,775 --> 00:08:05,570 - Every submission needs a tag number, 219 00:08:05,611 --> 00:08:07,238 and the tag number has to go with the head. 220 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:10,116 And I'm already having the worst week. 221 00:08:10,158 --> 00:08:12,201 Sarah's pissed at me because of all this Nick stuff. 222 00:08:12,243 --> 00:08:14,996 And then I got my tongue pierced three days ago, 223 00:08:15,037 --> 00:08:16,789 but then it got infected, so I had to take it out. 224 00:08:16,831 --> 00:08:19,208 Now it's so painful that I can't eat. 225 00:08:19,250 --> 00:08:21,419 And I'm so fucking hungry. 226 00:08:21,461 --> 00:08:23,337 And now you guys are yelling at me? 227 00:08:23,379 --> 00:08:25,840 - Nobody's yelling at you. - Who cares about your week? 228 00:08:25,882 --> 00:08:28,301 - Doesn't matter anyway. You're wasting your time. 229 00:08:28,342 --> 00:08:29,469 You're too far behind. 230 00:08:29,510 --> 00:08:31,429 - Too far behind? 231 00:08:31,471 --> 00:08:33,598 - Far behind who? [engine rumbling] 232 00:08:33,639 --> 00:08:34,599 - Him. 233 00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:39,353 [engine rumbling] 234 00:08:39,395 --> 00:08:42,356 [brash hip-hop music] 235 00:08:42,398 --> 00:08:46,944 * * 236 00:08:46,986 --> 00:08:49,697 - * We in this for the love of the life * 237 00:08:49,739 --> 00:08:50,948 * No, I'mma risk it all * 238 00:08:50,990 --> 00:08:52,617 * Yeah, I'mma risk it all * 239 00:08:52,658 --> 00:08:53,868 * I'mma risk it all * 240 00:08:53,910 --> 00:08:55,161 * For the love of this fight * 241 00:08:55,203 --> 00:08:57,080 * No, I'mma make 'em fall * 242 00:08:57,121 --> 00:08:59,540 * Yeah, I'mma make 'em fall, yeah, I'mma make 'em fall * 243 00:08:59,582 --> 00:09:02,585 * Yeah, I'mma bet on me, and I'mma take it all * 244 00:09:02,627 --> 00:09:04,003 - Who the fuck is that guy? 245 00:09:08,883 --> 00:09:10,802 - What's up, Carlos? 246 00:09:10,843 --> 00:09:12,470 - Five pythons in one day. 247 00:09:12,512 --> 00:09:15,765 Hey, save some for the rest of us, man. 248 00:09:15,807 --> 00:09:17,725 Save-- 249 00:09:17,767 --> 00:09:19,477 a lot of eye contact. 250 00:09:21,229 --> 00:09:22,730 - I thought what you said was very funny. 251 00:09:22,772 --> 00:09:24,065 - Thank you. 252 00:09:24,107 --> 00:09:26,526 - Okay, that's another 32 feet. Sign here. 253 00:09:26,567 --> 00:09:28,361 - 32 feet? 254 00:09:33,616 --> 00:09:35,076 - Explain Carlos, please. - Who the hell is Carlos? 255 00:09:35,118 --> 00:09:36,452 - Who is this? - Doesn't make any sense. 256 00:09:36,494 --> 00:09:38,037 - I don't know, but he's gonna win. 257 00:09:38,079 --> 00:09:40,039 He's killed like 20 snakes in four days. 258 00:09:40,081 --> 00:09:42,375 - Oh, my God. - 20? How the fuck? 259 00:09:42,417 --> 00:09:44,919 - We've got 3 1/2, and I thought we were doing good. 260 00:09:44,961 --> 00:09:46,504 - Perfect puncture wound, 261 00:09:46,546 --> 00:09:48,589 right between the eyes, every goddamn one. 262 00:09:48,631 --> 00:09:51,843 - He's a snake ninja. - So we should give up. 263 00:09:51,884 --> 00:09:53,594 We've been wasting our damn time. 264 00:09:53,636 --> 00:09:55,179 - No, we call a truce. 265 00:09:55,221 --> 00:09:56,764 Quit fighting until we can figure out 266 00:09:56,806 --> 00:09:58,474 how to beat this guy. 267 00:09:58,516 --> 00:10:03,104 Two archenemies teaming up to vanquish common foe. 268 00:10:03,146 --> 00:10:04,355 - It won't matter. 269 00:10:04,397 --> 00:10:05,523 Even if we combine our snakes, 270 00:10:05,565 --> 00:10:07,525 he'd still be kicking our asses. 271 00:10:07,567 --> 00:10:08,860 How does he find so many? 272 00:10:08,901 --> 00:10:10,403 - I bet he's got a secret hunting ground. 273 00:10:10,445 --> 00:10:12,280 We should follow him and see where he finds them. 274 00:10:12,321 --> 00:10:14,782 - Follow him from where? We don't know where he lives. 275 00:10:14,824 --> 00:10:18,536 - Nah, I know how to find out. 276 00:10:18,578 --> 00:10:21,539 [upbeat music] 277 00:10:21,581 --> 00:10:24,876 * * 278 00:10:24,917 --> 00:10:27,295 - Okay! 279 00:10:27,336 --> 00:10:32,925 - [muffled indistinct speech] 280 00:10:32,967 --> 00:10:34,594 Forgot I had this fucker on. 281 00:10:34,635 --> 00:10:37,972 You ever WOWO, work out with oxygen? 282 00:10:38,014 --> 00:10:39,932 Gives you more energy, 283 00:10:39,974 --> 00:10:42,143 faster recovery, it keeps you looking young. 284 00:10:42,185 --> 00:10:45,813 Here's a fun game. How old do you think I am? 285 00:10:45,855 --> 00:10:47,482 - 49. 286 00:10:47,523 --> 00:10:49,108 - 49? What, are you fucking dumb? 287 00:10:49,150 --> 00:10:53,237 No, I'm 42, but I look 31, and fuck, I feel 14. 288 00:10:53,279 --> 00:10:55,948 I had a wet dream last night, motherfucker. 289 00:10:55,990 --> 00:10:57,533 So you got my money or what? 290 00:10:57,575 --> 00:10:58,868 - I got something better than money. 291 00:10:58,910 --> 00:11:00,244 I got a proposition. 292 00:11:00,286 --> 00:11:02,121 I'm willing to come work for you. 293 00:11:02,163 --> 00:11:03,706 - Why the fuck would Rodney want that? 294 00:11:03,748 --> 00:11:05,083 What do you provide? 295 00:11:05,124 --> 00:11:06,209 - I mean, it seems like you could use someone 296 00:11:06,250 --> 00:11:07,752 who's not afraid to get their hands dirty. 297 00:11:07,794 --> 00:11:10,546 - Ooh, I don't like what you're insinuating there. 298 00:11:10,588 --> 00:11:12,590 I'm a legitimate businessman. - Yeah? 299 00:11:12,632 --> 00:11:14,467 I checked every penthouse and top floor apartment 300 00:11:14,509 --> 00:11:16,010 sold by Lamonca Development Group 301 00:11:16,052 --> 00:11:17,595 over the last six years. 302 00:11:17,637 --> 00:11:20,264 They're consistently 10% above comps. 303 00:11:20,306 --> 00:11:21,974 - Because I build premier fucking units 304 00:11:22,016 --> 00:11:23,893 with premier fucking materials. 305 00:11:23,935 --> 00:11:27,814 - Maybe, or maybe given how many of your units are sold 306 00:11:27,855 --> 00:11:29,273 to newly formed shell companies, 307 00:11:29,315 --> 00:11:33,277 you're just laundering money for foreign oligarchs. 308 00:11:33,319 --> 00:11:35,113 - All right, I'm impressed. 309 00:11:35,154 --> 00:11:37,240 - You can't hire this guy. He's a con man. 310 00:11:37,281 --> 00:11:39,951 - You think you get a fucking say in this, Jarren? 311 00:11:39,992 --> 00:11:41,869 Do the fucking elves get to tell Santa 312 00:11:41,911 --> 00:11:43,955 which kids were naughty? 313 00:11:43,996 --> 00:11:45,456 - No. - What do the elves do? 314 00:11:45,498 --> 00:11:48,167 - Nothing. They're just short losers. 315 00:11:48,209 --> 00:11:50,962 - Short fucking losers who live in Santa's shadow, 316 00:11:51,003 --> 00:11:53,506 you fucking elf. 317 00:11:53,548 --> 00:11:57,635 * * 318 00:11:57,677 --> 00:11:59,721 Welcome to Team Rodney. 319 00:11:59,762 --> 00:12:01,973 - I don't understand. What are we doing here? 320 00:12:02,014 --> 00:12:03,808 - It's my house. Gotta access my footage. 321 00:12:03,850 --> 00:12:05,393 Gotta get on the Wi-Fi. 322 00:12:05,435 --> 00:12:08,646 Don't wanna stream that shit over cellular, fuck up my data. 323 00:12:08,688 --> 00:12:10,690 - But why can't we just go inside? 324 00:12:10,732 --> 00:12:13,234 - 'Cause my wife's inside. I don't wanna surprise her. 325 00:12:13,276 --> 00:12:15,653 - Why? - She hates surprises, okay? 326 00:12:15,695 --> 00:12:17,321 She's gotta schedule, and I just show up out of the blue. 327 00:12:17,363 --> 00:12:18,740 You have any idea what that's gonna do to her? 328 00:12:18,781 --> 00:12:20,074 - Nothing. 329 00:12:20,116 --> 00:12:21,284 - Doesn't seem like an imposition at all. 330 00:12:21,325 --> 00:12:22,910 - Can't you just text her you're here? 331 00:12:22,952 --> 00:12:26,873 - And surprise her with a text? This guy just doesn't get it. 332 00:12:26,914 --> 00:12:28,624 You wanna know what's gonna happen if I go inside? 333 00:12:28,666 --> 00:12:30,376 My wife's gonna see me. She's gonna want sex. 334 00:12:30,418 --> 00:12:32,170 Okay? We don't have time for that. 335 00:12:32,211 --> 00:12:33,880 - Dad. - Not the way I do it. 336 00:12:33,921 --> 00:12:35,423 - Dad. - Sorry, Corby. 337 00:12:35,465 --> 00:12:37,842 Just 'cause you're a virgin doesn't mean that I am. 338 00:12:37,884 --> 00:12:39,135 - I found the footage. 339 00:12:39,177 --> 00:12:40,762 Can we just look at the footage already? 340 00:12:40,803 --> 00:12:42,513 - Here we go. 341 00:12:42,555 --> 00:12:44,098 Motherfuckers that got canoes... 342 00:12:44,140 --> 00:12:46,267 This is the intro from the kickoff event. 343 00:12:46,309 --> 00:12:47,602 Guess what I got? 344 00:12:47,643 --> 00:12:49,687 Here we go. Here we go. Okay, boom. 345 00:12:49,729 --> 00:12:52,065 That's that motherfucker's motorcycle. 346 00:12:52,106 --> 00:12:53,191 And that's his plate. 347 00:12:53,232 --> 00:12:54,525 - How's that help us? 348 00:12:54,567 --> 00:12:57,236 - My best friend Matt works at the DMV. 349 00:12:57,278 --> 00:12:59,697 I'll run the plates, get us an address. 350 00:12:59,739 --> 00:13:02,408 I'm gonna track this son of a bitch down. 351 00:13:02,450 --> 00:13:06,370 You--you still wish we'd gone inside? 352 00:13:06,412 --> 00:13:08,247 - Absolutely. - This has all been so weird. 353 00:13:08,289 --> 00:13:13,002 * * 354 00:13:13,044 --> 00:13:15,046 - Corby. 355 00:13:15,088 --> 00:13:17,298 I want you to hang back. - Why? 356 00:13:17,340 --> 00:13:18,674 - 'Cause I'm the pop, and you're the baby, 357 00:13:18,716 --> 00:13:19,967 and the baby don't ask questions. 358 00:13:20,009 --> 00:13:21,260 - Okay. 359 00:13:21,302 --> 00:13:22,970 - Also what we're about to do is illegal, 360 00:13:23,012 --> 00:13:25,056 and I don't want you involved. 361 00:13:25,098 --> 00:13:27,225 * * 362 00:13:27,266 --> 00:13:30,311 - I'll stay here and babysit. 363 00:13:30,353 --> 00:13:33,398 - I'm twice your height. 364 00:13:33,439 --> 00:13:35,900 - I can't run a stranger's plates, bro. 365 00:13:35,942 --> 00:13:37,276 I just don't wanna lose my job. 366 00:13:37,318 --> 00:13:39,320 - Wuh-buh, wuh-buh. 367 00:13:39,362 --> 00:13:41,864 You don't wanna lose your precious paycheck, huh? 368 00:13:41,906 --> 00:13:44,200 Huh, you're not gonna be able to take care of your sister, 369 00:13:44,242 --> 00:13:47,245 to afford her around-the-clock care? 370 00:13:47,286 --> 00:13:49,288 Come on, how's she doing, by the way, anyway? 371 00:13:49,330 --> 00:13:50,790 - Not great. 372 00:13:50,832 --> 00:13:52,417 We're just trying to keep her comfortable at this point. 373 00:13:52,458 --> 00:13:54,210 - Then goddammit, Matt, huh? 374 00:13:54,252 --> 00:13:56,087 You never been afraid to break a few rules. 375 00:13:56,129 --> 00:13:58,131 What happened to Matt Wendro who stole the fucking SAT book, 376 00:13:58,172 --> 00:13:59,549 gave it to the whole goddamn school? 377 00:13:59,590 --> 00:14:01,676 - He got caught. We all got caught. 378 00:14:01,718 --> 00:14:03,428 No one in our grade went to college. 379 00:14:03,469 --> 00:14:05,263 - We didn't need to go to college, okay? 380 00:14:05,304 --> 00:14:06,597 You still went down there 381 00:14:06,639 --> 00:14:08,933 and partied every weekend with those guys anyway. 382 00:14:08,975 --> 00:14:11,102 - Hey it's cool, man. Let's find another way. 383 00:14:11,144 --> 00:14:12,812 - No, no, hey, hey, hey, come on, come on. 384 00:14:16,149 --> 00:14:19,152 I know about you and Robin. - What? 385 00:14:19,193 --> 00:14:22,572 - I know about you and Robin. - What are you talking about? 386 00:14:22,613 --> 00:14:25,283 - I know that you're sleeping with my wife! 387 00:14:25,324 --> 00:14:27,493 - Hey, can I ask you something? 388 00:14:27,535 --> 00:14:29,287 - Sure. 389 00:14:29,328 --> 00:14:33,374 - So there's this guy, and I really like him, 390 00:14:33,416 --> 00:14:35,793 but he thinks I'm someone I'm not. 391 00:14:35,835 --> 00:14:37,336 - Is this something you should talk to 392 00:14:37,378 --> 00:14:40,173 one of your adult friends about? 393 00:14:40,214 --> 00:14:42,884 I'm going to, but they're all so busy. 394 00:14:42,925 --> 00:14:43,885 So what do you think? 395 00:14:43,926 --> 00:14:46,137 - Right. Um, I don't know. 396 00:14:46,179 --> 00:14:48,097 Kind of seems skeezy to me. 397 00:14:48,139 --> 00:14:50,808 I played "Call of Duty" with this guy named NinjaKillz, 398 00:14:50,850 --> 00:14:52,935 and I thought he was around my age. 399 00:14:52,977 --> 00:14:56,147 But one day I heard his wife yelling at him about a DUI. 400 00:14:56,189 --> 00:14:58,858 Turns out he's actually a 50-year-old dude from Arizona. 401 00:14:58,900 --> 00:15:00,943 - Maybe NinjaKillz was scared to tell you the truth 402 00:15:00,985 --> 00:15:03,112 because he thought you wouldn't like him. 403 00:15:03,154 --> 00:15:05,156 - He's older than my dad. It's creepy. 404 00:15:05,198 --> 00:15:07,950 - Right, totally. 405 00:15:07,992 --> 00:15:10,036 But have you thought about maybe going to meet up 406 00:15:10,078 --> 00:15:12,371 with him in person to see if you have a real connection? 407 00:15:12,413 --> 00:15:13,915 - To Arizona? 408 00:15:13,956 --> 00:15:15,958 - This all started because you and NinjaKillz 409 00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:17,543 really liked each other. 410 00:15:17,585 --> 00:15:20,004 Are you gonna throw away something so special 411 00:15:20,046 --> 00:15:22,173 just because of one little lie? 412 00:15:22,215 --> 00:15:24,133 - Do you want me to hook up with this guy? 413 00:15:24,175 --> 00:15:26,511 - No, I'm trying to get advice for my own thing, Corby. 414 00:15:26,552 --> 00:15:28,971 God, you don't get it. 415 00:15:30,556 --> 00:15:34,060 - Come on, Brock, I don't know what you're talking about. 416 00:15:34,102 --> 00:15:36,687 - Well, I heard you. Okay? 417 00:15:36,729 --> 00:15:39,399 I came home to surprise Robin, I heard you, 418 00:15:39,440 --> 00:15:42,652 and then the next time I came home, I saw you. 419 00:15:42,693 --> 00:15:44,070 And then there was another time I came home, 420 00:15:44,112 --> 00:15:45,029 but I didn't go in the house, 421 00:15:45,071 --> 00:15:46,030 but you were having sex 422 00:15:46,072 --> 00:15:47,073 against the Nest Cam. 423 00:15:47,115 --> 00:15:48,533 - [mouths] Nest Cam? - Jesus. 424 00:15:48,574 --> 00:15:51,369 Why didn't you say anything? - Because I don't care. 425 00:15:51,411 --> 00:15:53,663 You know, it's all about my elbow injury anyway. 426 00:15:53,704 --> 00:15:55,456 I can't put pressure on my right elbow. 427 00:15:55,498 --> 00:15:57,250 So I can't be on top during sex, 428 00:15:57,291 --> 00:15:58,793 which is, like, my best position. 429 00:15:58,835 --> 00:15:59,919 It's my go-to. 430 00:15:59,961 --> 00:16:01,337 It's the one I grew up doing the most. 431 00:16:01,379 --> 00:16:02,463 So it's only natural 432 00:16:02,505 --> 00:16:03,923 Robin's gonna be with somebody else. 433 00:16:03,965 --> 00:16:06,008 But as soon as my elbow is fixed, 434 00:16:06,050 --> 00:16:07,677 well, then I'm back on top. 435 00:16:07,719 --> 00:16:10,471 On top of my wife, on top of my life. 436 00:16:10,513 --> 00:16:12,348 - I wanted to tell you so many times. 437 00:16:12,390 --> 00:16:13,725 - Well, it would've been a boring conversation 438 00:16:13,766 --> 00:16:15,893 because I know everything anyway, okay? 439 00:16:15,935 --> 00:16:18,396 Been there, done that, and I'm okay with it. 440 00:16:18,438 --> 00:16:20,314 All right? 441 00:16:20,356 --> 00:16:21,649 - Then why are you bringing it up? 442 00:16:21,691 --> 00:16:24,068 - Because I can still pretend like I care, 443 00:16:24,110 --> 00:16:25,236 even if I don't. 444 00:16:25,278 --> 00:16:27,488 I can pretend like I don't mind 445 00:16:27,530 --> 00:16:29,532 that I'm an embarrassment to my son, 446 00:16:29,574 --> 00:16:31,784 and I can pretend like I don't care 447 00:16:31,826 --> 00:16:35,371 that I've lost my best friend and my wife at the same moment. 448 00:16:35,413 --> 00:16:37,039 I could pretend like 449 00:16:37,081 --> 00:16:39,917 I have never felt more alone in the whole fucking world, 450 00:16:39,959 --> 00:16:42,754 and I can pull it off, too, because I am a great actor. 451 00:16:42,795 --> 00:16:45,173 I'm a storyteller, and I bring stories to life! 452 00:16:45,214 --> 00:16:47,383 - I'll run the plates, man. You gotta calm down. 453 00:16:47,425 --> 00:16:49,761 - I am calm, all right? This is acting! 454 00:16:49,802 --> 00:16:51,721 - Goddammit. 455 00:16:54,432 --> 00:16:56,267 - Classic shakedown. 456 00:16:56,309 --> 00:16:58,895 - You need to talk to somebody, man? 457 00:16:58,936 --> 00:17:01,814 - About what? 458 00:17:01,856 --> 00:17:04,442 - Here, but it's not a residential address. 459 00:17:04,484 --> 00:17:08,446 The bike is registered to an LLC. 460 00:17:08,488 --> 00:17:10,865 - Family Fun Times Adventure Park? 461 00:17:12,450 --> 00:17:14,077 Excuse me. 462 00:17:14,118 --> 00:17:16,746 Hi, we're looking for this guy. 463 00:17:16,788 --> 00:17:19,082 He has dark hair, a scar on his face, 464 00:17:19,123 --> 00:17:20,416 kind of a lone wolf vibe. 465 00:17:20,458 --> 00:17:23,378 - You mean Condom Carl? - No, his name's Carlos. 466 00:17:23,419 --> 00:17:26,047 - Well, Condom Carl has a scar on his face, and he works here. 467 00:17:26,089 --> 00:17:28,674 He like, fixes the windmill and mops up vomit. 468 00:17:28,716 --> 00:17:30,385 - Plus, he picks up like, a shit ton of condoms. 469 00:17:30,426 --> 00:17:31,469 - Why are there a shit ton of condoms 470 00:17:31,511 --> 00:17:32,762 at the putt-putt course? 471 00:17:32,804 --> 00:17:34,055 - 'Cause there's holes in the fence, 472 00:17:34,097 --> 00:17:36,265 so high school kids sneak in and have sex here. 473 00:17:36,307 --> 00:17:37,809 Then Condom Carl picks up after 'em. 474 00:17:37,850 --> 00:17:39,519 - He made this like, weird condom stick 475 00:17:39,560 --> 00:17:41,646 with a nail on the end, so sad. 476 00:17:41,687 --> 00:17:44,023 - That's his snake stick. - No, it's for condoms. 477 00:17:44,065 --> 00:17:45,483 - He did kill a snake that one time. 478 00:17:45,525 --> 00:17:46,818 - Oh, yeah, like eight months ago, 479 00:17:46,859 --> 00:17:48,611 there was a big one living in the castle, 480 00:17:48,653 --> 00:17:49,737 and this guy stuck his hand in... 481 00:17:49,779 --> 00:17:51,697 [snaps jaws] Bit him. 482 00:17:51,739 --> 00:17:53,408 Then Condom Carl had to poke it to death. 483 00:17:53,449 --> 00:17:55,284 - All right, well, we're clearly talking about 484 00:17:55,326 --> 00:17:56,702 two different people here, okay? 485 00:17:56,744 --> 00:17:59,080 Our guy's a snake slayer. Not a fucking jizz janitor. 486 00:17:59,122 --> 00:18:00,873 - Okay, well, Condom Carl's over there, 487 00:18:00,915 --> 00:18:02,458 so you tell me. 488 00:18:06,879 --> 00:18:08,715 - What the hell? 489 00:18:08,756 --> 00:18:11,884 - Oh, here we go. Moving in for the kill. 490 00:18:14,554 --> 00:18:16,431 - Ah. 491 00:18:16,472 --> 00:18:23,604 * * 492 00:18:34,365 --> 00:18:36,451 - Whoa, how you liking that suit? 493 00:18:36,492 --> 00:18:39,203 - Yeah, feels good, feels fine. 494 00:18:39,245 --> 00:18:40,705 - From my Dominine line. 495 00:18:40,747 --> 00:18:42,999 Sweatshop made, baby. 496 00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:45,501 Yeah, I'm proud of that. Tell you what? 497 00:18:45,543 --> 00:18:48,212 I wish I grew up in a sweat shop. 498 00:18:48,254 --> 00:18:50,965 I'm jealous of those kids developing a work ethic. 499 00:18:51,007 --> 00:18:52,550 The only thing I was doing at that age 500 00:18:52,592 --> 00:18:54,343 was trying to figure out which pillow to fuck. 501 00:18:54,385 --> 00:18:56,721 - They're on the way. 502 00:18:56,763 --> 00:19:00,016 - Who's on the way? 503 00:19:00,058 --> 00:19:01,434 - Go ahead. 504 00:19:01,476 --> 00:19:03,478 - We're meeting Artyam Sikorof. 505 00:19:03,519 --> 00:19:05,188 He's looking to purchase three luxury apartments, 506 00:19:05,229 --> 00:19:06,981 well over ask in cash. 507 00:19:07,023 --> 00:19:09,025 In return, our lawyers will forget 508 00:19:09,067 --> 00:19:11,778 to report this transaction to the OFAC. 509 00:19:11,819 --> 00:19:13,446 - Just say we doing a crime, Jarren. 510 00:19:13,488 --> 00:19:15,406 Be direct, or don't be at all. 511 00:19:15,448 --> 00:19:16,616 - You read my book? 512 00:19:16,657 --> 00:19:17,950 - You think I'm gonna work for someone 513 00:19:17,992 --> 00:19:19,744 and not read everything they've ever written? 514 00:19:19,786 --> 00:19:22,371 - Somebody's obsessed. - Yes. 515 00:19:22,413 --> 00:19:25,166 Obsessed with making money. Are you not, Jare Bear? 516 00:19:25,208 --> 00:19:27,585 - Jare Bear, I like that. 517 00:19:27,627 --> 00:19:29,921 Write that down so I don't forget it. 518 00:19:29,962 --> 00:19:31,255 - You want me to write down Jare Bare? 519 00:19:31,297 --> 00:19:32,590 - Yes, Jare Bear. 520 00:19:32,632 --> 00:19:34,050 - Write it down, Jare Bear. 521 00:19:34,092 --> 00:19:36,803 - Okay, I think I know what's happening. 522 00:19:36,844 --> 00:19:40,223 What if Carlos and Condom Carl are twins? 523 00:19:40,264 --> 00:19:43,643 I went to high school with identical twins, Tim and Jim. 524 00:19:43,684 --> 00:19:45,770 And the only way to tell them apart was that 525 00:19:45,812 --> 00:19:47,647 one of them died of a heroin overdose. 526 00:19:47,688 --> 00:19:49,857 - Okay, they're not twins, all right? 527 00:19:49,899 --> 00:19:51,317 Listen, we are getting our asses 528 00:19:51,359 --> 00:19:52,819 handed to us by Condom Carl. 529 00:19:52,860 --> 00:19:55,446 - Something's just not right about this. 530 00:19:55,488 --> 00:19:58,324 If he works here full-time, when is he getting the snakes? 531 00:19:58,366 --> 00:20:00,535 And did you see him double lock the door, why? 532 00:20:00,576 --> 00:20:02,829 It's a putt-putt maintenance shed. 533 00:20:02,870 --> 00:20:05,873 - You know, when my wife started deadbolting the door, 534 00:20:05,915 --> 00:20:07,750 that's when I realized that something was going on 535 00:20:07,792 --> 00:20:10,628 between her and... 536 00:20:10,670 --> 00:20:13,005 you know, surprises. 537 00:20:13,047 --> 00:20:16,676 - We're coming back here. Tonight, after hours. 538 00:20:18,428 --> 00:20:20,596 We're gonna find out what's going on in that shed. 539 00:20:20,638 --> 00:20:23,558 [tense music] 540 00:20:23,599 --> 00:20:24,726 * * 541 00:20:24,767 --> 00:20:26,811 - I'll take all three. 542 00:20:26,853 --> 00:20:29,522 I'm prepared to do 5% above asking. 543 00:20:29,564 --> 00:20:34,652 - 5? 10% or we're done here. 544 00:20:34,694 --> 00:20:37,155 - Then we're done. 545 00:20:37,196 --> 00:20:39,198 Let me talk to my guys. 546 00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:41,576 Give me the room. 547 00:20:45,705 --> 00:20:48,499 5%? What the fuck, Jarren? 548 00:20:48,541 --> 00:20:50,668 - 5% is standard for deals this size. 549 00:20:50,710 --> 00:20:52,211 It's already 60 million, 550 00:20:52,253 --> 00:20:54,756 and he's offering another 3 for nothing. 551 00:20:54,797 --> 00:20:57,008 There will be more deals with this guy. 552 00:20:57,050 --> 00:20:59,427 If we close, we build a relationship. 553 00:20:59,469 --> 00:21:01,054 - Fuck that. 554 00:21:01,095 --> 00:21:03,639 You think Santa Claus is out there building relationships? 555 00:21:03,681 --> 00:21:05,016 - What? 556 00:21:05,058 --> 00:21:06,684 - Santa tells the reindeer where to go, 557 00:21:06,726 --> 00:21:08,186 the reindeer don't fucking negotiate. 558 00:21:08,227 --> 00:21:09,812 - We're not talking about Santa. 559 00:21:09,854 --> 00:21:11,731 We're talking about $63 million. 560 00:21:11,773 --> 00:21:15,109 - Which should be 66 million. - This guy's rich. 561 00:21:15,151 --> 00:21:17,070 What do all rich people have in common? 562 00:21:17,111 --> 00:21:19,197 They understand that time is their primary asset. 563 00:21:19,238 --> 00:21:20,615 - I always say that. 564 00:21:20,656 --> 00:21:21,866 - This guy walks away without a deal, 565 00:21:21,908 --> 00:21:23,743 he wasted his time, his primary asset. 566 00:21:23,785 --> 00:21:25,787 So you have the leverage. 567 00:21:25,828 --> 00:21:28,414 I say, raise that ask. 568 00:21:28,456 --> 00:21:30,500 - It's a bad idea, Rodney. 569 00:21:30,541 --> 00:21:31,709 - Okay. 570 00:21:31,751 --> 00:21:32,835 [clears throat] 571 00:21:32,877 --> 00:21:37,840 So I talked to my guys, 572 00:21:37,882 --> 00:21:40,635 and the price just went up. 573 00:21:40,676 --> 00:21:42,970 It's now 12%, 574 00:21:43,012 --> 00:21:45,848 Why don't you consider it a tax for waste of my fucking time? 575 00:21:52,563 --> 00:21:54,607 - I'll do 10. 576 00:21:54,649 --> 00:21:56,234 - My guy. 577 00:21:56,275 --> 00:21:59,070 Welcome to Team Rodney. [chuckles] 578 00:21:59,112 --> 00:22:02,240 - How late does Condom Carl work? 579 00:22:02,281 --> 00:22:04,575 [cell phone beeps] Can you turn that off? 580 00:22:04,617 --> 00:22:06,160 I'm trying to stay incognito here. 581 00:22:06,202 --> 00:22:07,995 - Sorry. I'm sorry. 582 00:22:08,037 --> 00:22:10,289 It's that Nate guy. He keeps texting. 583 00:22:10,331 --> 00:22:11,749 - Seriously, this again? 584 00:22:11,791 --> 00:22:13,960 Text and say you're not interested, J-Glopp. 585 00:22:14,001 --> 00:22:15,878 - Yeah, you're right. 586 00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:18,589 I don't wanna be some old child molester from Arizona. 587 00:22:18,631 --> 00:22:19,799 - What? 588 00:22:19,841 --> 00:22:21,175 - It's something that happened to Corby. 589 00:22:21,217 --> 00:22:23,970 - Oh, my God. - Or almost happened. 590 00:22:24,011 --> 00:22:25,805 I don't know. I wasn't paying attention. 591 00:22:28,933 --> 00:22:31,477 Maybe I should see him, 592 00:22:31,519 --> 00:22:34,105 Nate, just to tell him that I'm not interested in him. 593 00:22:34,147 --> 00:22:35,773 - "Sorry... - Oh, no, don't. 594 00:22:35,815 --> 00:22:36,983 - "To run off. - No, don't text. 595 00:22:37,024 --> 00:22:38,359 - "Had an important business meeting. 596 00:22:38,401 --> 00:22:39,444 - Don't send that. 597 00:22:39,485 --> 00:22:42,029 - Let's get together." 598 00:22:42,071 --> 00:22:43,281 - Craig! 599 00:22:43,322 --> 00:22:45,992 - Look, you clearly wanna be with this guy. 600 00:22:46,033 --> 00:22:47,493 and we were gonna keep talking about it 601 00:22:47,535 --> 00:22:48,619 until I told you it was okay, 602 00:22:48,661 --> 00:22:50,872 so I'm telling you, it's okay. 603 00:22:50,913 --> 00:22:52,331 Now, if you don't mind, 604 00:22:52,373 --> 00:22:54,125 my life dream hinges on whether or not we figure out 605 00:22:54,167 --> 00:22:56,085 where Condom crawl is getting these snakes. 606 00:22:56,127 --> 00:22:59,213 And I'd like to focus on that, please. 607 00:22:59,255 --> 00:23:01,257 - He'd love to. 608 00:23:01,299 --> 00:23:03,468 - Hey, here he comes. 609 00:23:03,509 --> 00:23:05,470 [engine rumbling] 610 00:23:05,511 --> 00:23:12,685 * * 611 00:23:21,694 --> 00:23:23,696 - Psst. 612 00:23:23,738 --> 00:23:24,989 - You didn't even see me. 613 00:23:25,031 --> 00:23:26,115 It's 'cause I don't have a silhouette. 614 00:23:26,157 --> 00:23:27,658 - Did you bring the bolt cutters? 615 00:23:27,700 --> 00:23:34,832 * * 616 00:23:40,046 --> 00:23:41,339 [grunts] 617 00:23:49,764 --> 00:23:51,391 - It's warm. 618 00:24:01,901 --> 00:24:04,445 - Stinks like shit. 619 00:24:04,487 --> 00:24:06,030 - What the fuck? 620 00:24:06,072 --> 00:24:08,199 - It's so hot in here. 621 00:24:08,241 --> 00:24:10,910 - It's because of all these fucking space heaters. 622 00:24:10,952 --> 00:24:18,084 * * 623 00:24:20,795 --> 00:24:22,755 - Oh, my God. - Oh, shit. 624 00:24:22,797 --> 00:24:24,924 [snakes hissing] 625 00:24:29,762 --> 00:24:31,389 - Holy shit, they said that Condom Carl 626 00:24:31,431 --> 00:24:33,266 killed that python in the castle. 627 00:24:33,307 --> 00:24:36,769 Why is a snake living in a putt-putt castle? 628 00:24:36,811 --> 00:24:39,856 - It was laying eggs. Fucker found a nest. 629 00:24:39,897 --> 00:24:41,941 - He must have known about the contest. 630 00:24:41,983 --> 00:24:43,776 He kept the eggs, hatched them, 631 00:24:43,818 --> 00:24:45,445 raised them to full-grown snakes. 632 00:24:45,486 --> 00:24:46,988 - Never even stepped foot in the swamp. 633 00:24:47,029 --> 00:24:48,406 - We should take pictures. 634 00:24:48,448 --> 00:24:50,241 We can bring proof to the water management guys 635 00:24:50,283 --> 00:24:51,325 and get him disqualified. 636 00:24:51,367 --> 00:24:53,786 - [blows raspberry] 637 00:24:53,828 --> 00:24:56,456 No, we kill these snakes and take 'em in ourselves. 638 00:24:56,497 --> 00:24:59,417 Split it 50/50, make it a two-team race. 639 00:24:59,459 --> 00:25:01,252 And he won't be able to prove we did anything wrong 640 00:25:01,294 --> 00:25:02,754 without admitting what he was doing himself. 641 00:25:02,795 --> 00:25:05,339 - But that's not fair. - Oh, no. 642 00:25:05,381 --> 00:25:07,633 Oh, that's unfair to Condom Carl. 643 00:25:07,675 --> 00:25:10,511 How's he gonna feel when he can't fucking cheat anymore? 644 00:25:10,553 --> 00:25:12,638 - No, it's not fair to the other people in the contest. 645 00:25:12,680 --> 00:25:14,640 We're not the only people who want the prize money. 646 00:25:14,682 --> 00:25:16,934 - A lot of people don't get what they want, okay? 647 00:25:16,976 --> 00:25:18,186 I didn't want my mom to sleep 648 00:25:18,227 --> 00:25:19,437 with every fucking Little League coach I had, 649 00:25:19,479 --> 00:25:20,980 but she did it anyway. 650 00:25:21,022 --> 00:25:22,106 That's how this country works. 651 00:25:22,148 --> 00:25:23,483 It's time you grow a pair, missy. 652 00:25:23,524 --> 00:25:26,819 - Well, we're not gonna do it, right, Craig? 653 00:25:26,861 --> 00:25:28,905 Craig, tell him. 654 00:25:28,946 --> 00:25:31,991 [tense music] 655 00:25:32,033 --> 00:25:34,494 - I say we take the snakes. 656 00:25:35,912 --> 00:25:40,208 - Oh, oh, there he is. Welcome to mi casa. 657 00:25:40,249 --> 00:25:41,709 - Hey, you sure it's okay that I'm here? 658 00:25:41,751 --> 00:25:43,669 This isn't like a family dinner or anything, right? 659 00:25:43,711 --> 00:25:45,380 - That fucking guy's here. It can't be that intimate. 660 00:25:45,421 --> 00:25:47,715 Anyways, you crushed it today, man. 661 00:25:47,757 --> 00:25:49,425 And crushing it makes you family. 662 00:25:49,467 --> 00:25:51,094 - Look, I'm just glad that shit worked out. 663 00:25:51,135 --> 00:25:53,346 - I got you a nice little welcome gift in my office. 664 00:25:53,388 --> 00:25:55,014 Why don't you go check it out? 665 00:25:55,056 --> 00:25:57,016 * * 666 00:25:57,058 --> 00:25:59,185 - Oh. 667 00:25:59,227 --> 00:26:04,273 * * 668 00:26:04,315 --> 00:26:07,235 What the fuck? 669 00:26:07,276 --> 00:26:09,278 Jarren? 670 00:26:09,320 --> 00:26:12,573 - What do you think? You like that? 671 00:26:12,615 --> 00:26:17,120 Wanted to put a bow on him, but kind of ran out of time. 672 00:26:17,161 --> 00:26:19,205 So what are you up to, Isaiah? 673 00:26:19,247 --> 00:26:20,706 You trying to make some money off me? 674 00:26:20,748 --> 00:26:22,667 - Man, I wouldn't try to make money off you. 675 00:26:22,708 --> 00:26:25,420 - Hey, relax. It's smart. I'm rich. 676 00:26:25,461 --> 00:26:27,380 You should be trying to make some money off me, 677 00:26:27,422 --> 00:26:30,425 but this is a two-way street. 678 00:26:30,466 --> 00:26:33,469 And if you wanna make money off me, 679 00:26:33,511 --> 00:26:35,430 you're gonna make money for me. 680 00:26:35,471 --> 00:26:36,431 You get that? 681 00:26:36,472 --> 00:26:37,765 - I got you. 682 00:26:39,517 --> 00:26:42,061 - I'm hungry. Let's go get some fajitas. 683 00:26:42,103 --> 00:26:44,021 * * 684 00:26:44,063 --> 00:26:45,815 Fajitas! 685 00:26:45,857 --> 00:26:48,985 * * 686 00:26:49,026 --> 00:26:50,445 - No, this is wrong. 687 00:26:50,486 --> 00:26:51,946 We're not gonna take these snakes. 688 00:26:51,988 --> 00:26:53,698 - This contest is about getting pythons off the street. 689 00:26:53,740 --> 00:26:54,824 That's all we're doing here. 690 00:26:54,866 --> 00:26:55,992 - These were bred to be killed. 691 00:26:56,033 --> 00:26:57,368 It's different. 692 00:26:57,410 --> 00:26:58,578 We'll get Carlos kicked out of the contest, 693 00:26:58,619 --> 00:27:00,246 then we're tied for first place again. 694 00:27:00,288 --> 00:27:02,081 - Until someone else cheats. 695 00:27:02,123 --> 00:27:03,875 Are you even paying attention? 696 00:27:03,916 --> 00:27:05,460 Everyone is lying, 697 00:27:05,501 --> 00:27:08,212 and everyone is getting away with it. 698 00:27:08,254 --> 00:27:10,048 Condom Carl raises his own snakes. 699 00:27:10,089 --> 00:27:11,924 He's in first place. 700 00:27:11,966 --> 00:27:14,719 Brock's wife is cheating on him with his best friend. 701 00:27:14,761 --> 00:27:15,887 This guy acts like he doesn't care. 702 00:27:15,928 --> 00:27:17,597 - That's 'cause of the elbow, okay? 703 00:27:17,638 --> 00:27:19,932 That situation's nuanced. - You're lying. 704 00:27:19,974 --> 00:27:23,186 You want that guy to think you're rich, don't you? 705 00:27:23,227 --> 00:27:24,562 - You're the one who texted him. 706 00:27:24,604 --> 00:27:25,980 - Because I'm tired of being the only one 707 00:27:26,022 --> 00:27:27,273 playing by the rules. 708 00:27:27,315 --> 00:27:28,941 The world's unfair, Jillian G. 709 00:27:28,983 --> 00:27:32,153 Maybe it's okay if it's unfair in our favor for once. 710 00:27:32,195 --> 00:27:34,781 [flame roars] - Guys, guys! 711 00:27:34,822 --> 00:27:36,074 Oh, my God. - Oh, fuck. 712 00:27:36,115 --> 00:27:37,241 - Shit. - What the fuck? 713 00:27:37,283 --> 00:27:38,493 - Shit. - It's the gasoline! 714 00:27:38,534 --> 00:27:40,369 - It's not gasoline. It's a snake pheromone. 715 00:27:40,411 --> 00:27:42,497 Oh, fuck! 716 00:27:42,538 --> 00:27:44,207 - Get the suit off. Take the suit off. 717 00:27:44,248 --> 00:27:46,125 - Get the suit off! - Shit! 718 00:27:46,167 --> 00:27:47,627 - Oh! 719 00:27:47,668 --> 00:27:50,713 - * Burn, motherfucker, burn * 720 00:27:50,755 --> 00:27:53,800 [Bloodhound Gang's "Fire Water Burn"] 721 00:27:53,841 --> 00:28:00,807 * * 722 00:28:00,848 --> 00:28:04,894 - [coughing] 723 00:28:04,936 --> 00:28:07,897 [all coughing] 724 00:28:07,939 --> 00:28:11,317 * * 725 00:28:11,359 --> 00:28:12,485 - What should we do? 726 00:28:12,527 --> 00:28:13,653 Should we call the fire department? 727 00:28:13,694 --> 00:28:16,614 - Fuck no. We're trespassing. 728 00:28:16,656 --> 00:28:19,492 Get the fuck out of here. 729 00:28:19,534 --> 00:28:21,702 - Is everything at this putt-putt flammable? 730 00:28:21,744 --> 00:28:24,497 - Why's the lake on fire? 731 00:28:24,539 --> 00:28:27,166 Shit, shit, shit, shit. We gotta go. 732 00:28:27,208 --> 00:28:29,585 To the Jeep, come on, come on. We gotta go! 733 00:28:29,627 --> 00:28:31,754 - * Yeah, I'm hung like planet Pluto * 734 00:28:31,796 --> 00:28:33,965 * Hard to see with the naked eye * 735 00:28:34,006 --> 00:28:36,759 * But if I crashed into Uranus * 736 00:28:36,801 --> 00:28:39,512 * I would stick it where the sun don't shine * 737 00:28:39,554 --> 00:28:41,723 * 'Cause I'm kind of like Han Solo * 738 00:28:41,764 --> 00:28:44,058 * Always stroking my own Wookie * 739 00:28:44,100 --> 00:28:46,853 * I'm the root of all that's evil, yeah * 740 00:28:46,894 --> 00:28:49,355 * But you can call me Cookie * 741 00:28:49,397 --> 00:28:51,691 * The roof, the roof * 742 00:28:51,733 --> 00:28:54,402 * The roof is on fire * 743 00:28:54,444 --> 00:28:56,738 * The roof, the roof * 744 00:28:56,779 --> 00:28:59,407 * The roof is on fire * 745 00:28:59,449 --> 00:29:02,118 * The roof, the roof * 746 00:29:02,160 --> 00:29:04,328 * The roof is on fire * 747 00:29:04,370 --> 00:29:09,333 * We don't need no water, let the motherfucker burn * 748 00:29:09,375 --> 00:29:13,004 * Burn, motherfucker, burn * 749 00:29:13,046 --> 00:29:19,969 * * 750 00:29:29,771 --> 00:29:34,025 * Yo, yo, this hardcore ghetto gangster image * 751 00:29:34,067 --> 00:29:36,069 * Takes a lot of practice * 752 00:29:36,110 --> 00:29:38,237 * I'm not Black like Barry White * 753 00:29:38,279 --> 00:29:40,990 * No, I am white like Frank Black is * 754 00:29:41,032 --> 00:29:43,868 * So if man is five and the devil is six * 755 00:29:43,910 --> 00:29:47,080 * Then that must make me seven * 756 00:29:47,121 --> 00:29:51,167 * This honkey's gone to heaven * 757 00:29:51,209 --> 00:29:52,919 * But if I got to hell * 758 00:29:52,960 --> 00:29:54,754 * Well then, I hope I burn well * 759 00:29:54,796 --> 00:29:56,881 - Not a doctor. - Shh.