1 00:00:14,015 --> 00:00:17,226 - [chuckles] 2 00:00:17,268 --> 00:00:21,606 I see you. Come to papa. 3 00:00:21,647 --> 00:00:24,525 - * Straight into my hard drive, baby * 4 00:00:24,567 --> 00:00:26,736 * Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah * 5 00:00:26,778 --> 00:00:28,738 * I'm 15 in my garden skipping * 6 00:00:28,780 --> 00:00:31,199 * My neighbor Sue is watching * 7 00:00:31,240 --> 00:00:32,658 Howdy. - Hey, Boone. 8 00:00:32,700 --> 00:00:34,786 - Got a big old fat one for you, Gretch. 9 00:00:34,827 --> 00:00:37,163 * * 10 00:00:37,205 --> 00:00:38,873 - You get 58 bucks. 11 00:00:38,915 --> 00:00:41,876 - Okay, now, not bad. 12 00:00:41,918 --> 00:00:43,878 [telephone rings] 13 00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:45,421 * * 14 00:00:45,463 --> 00:00:48,466 - Big dead snakes, just like you wanted. 15 00:00:48,508 --> 00:00:52,303 Don't tell anyone where you got this, you fucking weirdo. 16 00:00:52,345 --> 00:00:54,931 - * Give me that fire * 17 00:00:54,972 --> 00:00:57,850 - Oh, that is real good. 18 00:00:57,892 --> 00:01:01,521 - * Don't be afraid to make, to make money, boy * 19 00:01:01,562 --> 00:01:04,982 * Don't be afraid to make, to make money, boy * 20 00:01:05,024 --> 00:01:08,319 * Don't be afraid to make, to make money, boy * 21 00:01:08,361 --> 00:01:11,697 * Don't be afraid to make, to make money * 22 00:01:11,739 --> 00:01:13,616 * * 23 00:01:13,658 --> 00:01:16,035 * Straight into my hard drive * 24 00:01:16,077 --> 00:01:17,912 [indistinct chatter] 25 00:01:17,954 --> 00:01:20,331 * Give me that gold * 26 00:01:20,373 --> 00:01:23,084 * Straight into my hard drive, baby * 27 00:01:23,126 --> 00:01:24,794 * Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah * 28 00:01:24,836 --> 00:01:26,295 [bell dings] 29 00:01:26,337 --> 00:01:29,257 * Non-shatter ruler, put it on the table and go * 30 00:01:29,298 --> 00:01:31,509 * Watch it shatter * 31 00:01:31,551 --> 00:01:34,971 * Clearly must talk to Neo with the Audi * 32 00:01:35,012 --> 00:01:38,015 * The next morning he shouts from his door * 33 00:01:38,057 --> 00:01:41,060 * Don't be afraid to make, to make money, boy * 34 00:01:41,102 --> 00:01:43,813 - Oh, damn, that's ugly. 35 00:01:43,855 --> 00:01:48,359 * * 36 00:01:48,401 --> 00:01:51,195 - [gasps] It's stunning. 37 00:01:51,237 --> 00:01:53,072 - I know, right? Aren't you obsessed? 38 00:01:53,114 --> 00:01:54,615 - Beyond. 39 00:01:54,657 --> 00:01:57,785 Oh, this will be perfect for an event I have coming up. 40 00:01:57,827 --> 00:01:59,120 It's a charity event. 41 00:01:59,162 --> 00:02:01,456 - Oh. - Okay, so what's the damage? 42 00:02:01,497 --> 00:02:03,750 How much trouble am I gonna get in with my husband? 43 00:02:03,791 --> 00:02:05,293 - It's $14,000. 44 00:02:05,334 --> 00:02:07,128 - Oh, wow. [scoffs] 45 00:02:07,170 --> 00:02:09,922 That's a really good deal. 46 00:02:09,964 --> 00:02:11,299 * To make money * 47 00:02:11,340 --> 00:02:13,509 * Give me that gold * 48 00:02:13,551 --> 00:02:15,219 * Straight into my hard drive * 49 00:02:15,261 --> 00:02:16,721 - Hey, Craig. 50 00:02:16,763 --> 00:02:18,473 - [breathing heavily] What's up, Jillian G.? 51 00:02:18,514 --> 00:02:19,682 - You're breathing kind of hard. 52 00:02:19,724 --> 00:02:22,518 Are you okay? - No, I'm dying. 53 00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:25,146 I'm working out, but fucking Troy keeps staring at me. 54 00:02:25,188 --> 00:02:26,814 I think he's figured out I just live here 55 00:02:26,856 --> 00:02:29,317 and I don't actually exercise 15 hours a day. 56 00:02:29,358 --> 00:02:31,277 [telephone ringing] 57 00:02:31,319 --> 00:02:34,614 Oh, thank God. [groans] What's going on? 58 00:02:34,655 --> 00:02:37,241 - I'm at the Water District HQ to hand in a snake, 59 00:02:37,283 --> 00:02:38,534 and the cops are here. 60 00:02:38,576 --> 00:02:39,994 Do you think they're trying to figure out 61 00:02:40,036 --> 00:02:41,454 who burned down the putt-putt? 62 00:02:41,496 --> 00:02:42,955 - Fuck, Condom Carl probably told them the fire 63 00:02:42,997 --> 00:02:44,499 had something to do with the snake hunt. 64 00:02:44,540 --> 00:02:45,875 - What if we left evidence? 65 00:02:45,917 --> 00:02:47,710 I mean, I've been losing big clumps of hair 66 00:02:47,752 --> 00:02:50,046 ever since I stopped eating fruits and vegetables. 67 00:02:50,088 --> 00:02:51,339 They're just so expensive, 68 00:02:51,381 --> 00:02:52,632 and they don't keep in the billboard. 69 00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:56,302 - Shit, I can't go to jail. 70 00:02:56,344 --> 00:02:58,179 Oh, great, here comes Troy again. 71 00:02:58,221 --> 00:02:59,472 He's gonna offer me a towel, 72 00:02:59,514 --> 00:03:00,515 but I know he's not on my side. 73 00:03:00,556 --> 00:03:02,183 - So what do we do? 74 00:03:02,225 --> 00:03:04,143 - [grunts] Nothing, okay? 75 00:03:04,185 --> 00:03:07,688 Stay away from Condom Carl and the snakes and the cops. 76 00:03:07,730 --> 00:03:09,357 We should take a couple days off. 77 00:03:09,399 --> 00:03:10,775 - I am running low on cash. 78 00:03:10,817 --> 00:03:12,735 I could use the day to sign on to TaskRabbit 79 00:03:12,777 --> 00:03:14,195 and Uber and Postmates and-- - Troy's here, got to go. 80 00:03:14,237 --> 00:03:16,489 What the fuck, man? They pay you by the towel? 81 00:03:16,531 --> 00:03:18,199 Leave me alone. [line clicks] 82 00:03:18,241 --> 00:03:21,327 - [sighs] Okay, let's make some money. 83 00:03:21,369 --> 00:03:24,288 [soft music] 84 00:03:24,330 --> 00:03:31,462 * * 85 00:03:33,381 --> 00:03:35,508 [doorbell beeps] 86 00:03:35,550 --> 00:03:37,301 [camera lens whirs] 87 00:03:37,343 --> 00:03:38,636 - Hello? 88 00:03:38,678 --> 00:03:41,514 - Uh, hi, it's your TaskRabbit. 89 00:03:41,556 --> 00:03:45,101 [door rings, lock clicks] 90 00:03:45,143 --> 00:03:49,814 - Ginny. - Jilly--um, Jillian. 91 00:03:49,856 --> 00:03:52,233 - Jillian, yes, of course. I have a friend named Ginny. 92 00:03:52,275 --> 00:03:54,569 That's what that was. Come on in. 93 00:03:55,945 --> 00:04:00,700 Okay, wow. You are actually perfect. 94 00:04:00,742 --> 00:04:02,034 [door buzzes, lock clicks] 95 00:04:02,076 --> 00:04:05,079 So much more accurate than the other girls. 96 00:04:05,121 --> 00:04:06,914 - Thank you. - Come on in. 97 00:04:06,956 --> 00:04:09,041 Let me get you something to drink. 98 00:04:09,083 --> 00:04:11,085 [chuckles] 99 00:04:11,127 --> 00:04:12,587 What's that? 100 00:04:12,628 --> 00:04:14,797 - Oh, your posting said to pack for multiple days. 101 00:04:14,839 --> 00:04:16,507 So I brought a change of clothes. 102 00:04:16,549 --> 00:04:18,551 - Wow. [laughs] 103 00:04:18,593 --> 00:04:20,094 Still or sparkling? 104 00:04:20,136 --> 00:04:22,013 - Sparkling, please. 105 00:04:22,055 --> 00:04:24,390 Whoa, your fridge is so clean. 106 00:04:24,432 --> 00:04:27,435 Most fridges are filled with, like, food. 107 00:04:27,477 --> 00:04:29,437 - Oh, my God, you're hilarious. 108 00:04:29,479 --> 00:04:30,855 We have a food fridge, too, girl. 109 00:04:30,897 --> 00:04:32,190 [laughs] 110 00:04:32,231 --> 00:04:34,984 See? Oh, yeah, two fridges. 111 00:04:35,026 --> 00:04:37,945 I know what you're thinking. She's so OCD. 112 00:04:37,987 --> 00:04:41,074 [laughs] - [laughs] 113 00:04:41,115 --> 00:04:43,826 - No, but I do suffer from that, though. 114 00:04:46,120 --> 00:04:47,538 - Oh. 115 00:04:50,750 --> 00:04:52,460 - So George-- that's my husband-- 116 00:04:52,502 --> 00:04:53,920 he makes us live in Florida 117 00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:55,922 because there's no state income tax. 118 00:04:55,963 --> 00:04:58,591 We're supposed to spend 183 days a year here 119 00:04:58,633 --> 00:05:00,718 in order to qualify as residents, 120 00:05:00,760 --> 00:05:03,096 but I've had a really tough year, 121 00:05:03,137 --> 00:05:04,389 so we've had to travel more 122 00:05:04,430 --> 00:05:07,558 than usual for my mental health. 123 00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:09,519 Anyway, we've been spending more time than normal 124 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:11,562 at our house in Montauk, so technically the Hamptons, 125 00:05:11,604 --> 00:05:14,399 and now the IRS is accusing us of tax evasion. 126 00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:16,484 - Oh, no, that's awful. - Oh, it's fine. 127 00:05:16,526 --> 00:05:17,819 In some tax brackets, 128 00:05:17,860 --> 00:05:19,654 you just have to deal with this kind of stuff. 129 00:05:19,695 --> 00:05:21,614 - Well, I'm not even in a tax bracket, 130 00:05:21,656 --> 00:05:23,116 so I can go wherever I want. 131 00:05:23,157 --> 00:05:25,326 - Ugh, I'm so envious of that. 132 00:05:25,368 --> 00:05:27,286 Anyways, George has some friends 133 00:05:27,328 --> 00:05:28,663 who have connections at the IRS, 134 00:05:28,704 --> 00:05:30,540 and we heard that an agent's gonna come by 135 00:05:30,581 --> 00:05:31,958 for a residency check. 136 00:05:31,999 --> 00:05:34,419 All you have to do is just answer the door 137 00:05:34,460 --> 00:05:35,586 and pretend to be me. 138 00:05:35,628 --> 00:05:37,380 Just say I'm Sloane Faulkner. 139 00:05:37,422 --> 00:05:39,340 Oh, can you do an American accent? 140 00:05:39,382 --> 00:05:40,717 - Mm-hmm. 141 00:05:40,758 --> 00:05:42,677 [bad American accent] I'm Sloane Faulkner. 142 00:05:42,719 --> 00:05:45,847 I'm Sloane Faulkner. I'm Sloane Faulkner. 143 00:05:45,888 --> 00:05:47,306 [normal voice] Sorry, that's not it. 144 00:05:47,348 --> 00:05:48,725 I have an access word. 145 00:05:48,766 --> 00:05:50,476 Let me just find it. It's "hot dog." 146 00:05:50,518 --> 00:05:52,979 Hot dog, hot dog. 147 00:05:53,020 --> 00:05:57,233 [bad American accent] I'm... I'm Sloane Faulkner. 148 00:05:57,275 --> 00:05:59,444 - You'll get there. I'm not even worried about it. 149 00:05:59,485 --> 00:06:01,863 [chuckles] So that's it. 150 00:06:01,904 --> 00:06:03,489 Just remember to answer the door 151 00:06:03,531 --> 00:06:05,616 and don't forget to feed Gigi. 152 00:06:05,658 --> 00:06:07,869 And don't worry. She's sweet. 153 00:06:07,910 --> 00:06:09,912 - [normal voice] I'm sure she is. I love cats. 154 00:06:09,954 --> 00:06:12,623 - Oh, my God, I was talking about you to the cat. 155 00:06:12,665 --> 00:06:14,459 [laughs] You're hilarious. 156 00:06:14,500 --> 00:06:17,336 Oh, and don't have anybody here while you're staying here. 157 00:06:17,378 --> 00:06:18,546 That's George's rule, not mine. 158 00:06:18,588 --> 00:06:20,465 It's because of his art collection. 159 00:06:20,506 --> 00:06:24,844 I guess it's worth something. The art world is so random. 160 00:06:24,886 --> 00:06:27,138 - Don't worry, I will take excellent care of your home. 161 00:06:27,180 --> 00:06:28,890 - Oh, and $500 is okay for two days? 162 00:06:28,931 --> 00:06:32,060 - Oh, wow, yes. That's very generous. 163 00:06:32,101 --> 00:06:34,645 - I really appreciate you saying that. 164 00:06:34,687 --> 00:06:38,191 I have so much respect for working people. 165 00:06:38,232 --> 00:06:39,776 Oh, one more thing-- 166 00:06:39,817 --> 00:06:41,861 do you mind wearing these booties while you're here? 167 00:06:41,903 --> 00:06:45,448 Our housekeeper left thick black marks all over the floor. 168 00:06:45,490 --> 00:06:46,908 I guess she had a heavy walk. [chuckles] 169 00:06:46,949 --> 00:06:48,868 - Well, I'll make sure I tiptoe about. 170 00:06:48,910 --> 00:06:50,411 - Oh, you're gonna be fine, 171 00:06:50,453 --> 00:06:52,580 but, seriously, wear the booties. 172 00:06:52,622 --> 00:06:55,249 Bye! [door buzzes, lock clicks] 173 00:06:55,291 --> 00:06:56,876 [upbeat music] 174 00:06:56,918 --> 00:07:00,380 - * We-we-we-welcome to the good life * 175 00:07:00,421 --> 00:07:06,928 * * 176 00:07:06,969 --> 00:07:08,930 * We-we-we-welcome * 177 00:07:08,971 --> 00:07:10,556 * To the good life * 178 00:07:10,598 --> 00:07:12,475 * We-we-we-welcome * 179 00:07:12,517 --> 00:07:14,519 * To the good life * 180 00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:16,020 * * 181 00:07:16,062 --> 00:07:18,314 * Welcome to the good life * 182 00:07:18,356 --> 00:07:20,191 * * 183 00:07:20,233 --> 00:07:22,110 * First-class tickets in a row * 184 00:07:22,151 --> 00:07:26,447 * Blowing kisses, sitting poolside * 185 00:07:26,489 --> 00:07:28,408 * You're light as a feather * 186 00:07:28,449 --> 00:07:29,450 - [sighs happily] 187 00:07:29,492 --> 00:07:31,077 - * And soft as a pearl * 188 00:07:31,119 --> 00:07:33,329 * We-welcome to the good life * 189 00:07:33,371 --> 00:07:36,374 * Sweet honeysuckle in a flute full of bubbles * 190 00:07:36,416 --> 00:07:38,543 * At a bullfight * 191 00:07:38,584 --> 00:07:41,921 - Hello, Sloane, today's weather is colder than usual. 192 00:07:41,963 --> 00:07:44,424 Would you like me to turn on the heated floors? 193 00:07:44,465 --> 00:07:46,676 - Heated floors? 194 00:07:46,718 --> 00:07:51,472 - * All that glitters is gold when you're in a gold mine * 195 00:07:51,514 --> 00:07:55,643 * Welcome to the good life, welcome, welcome * 196 00:07:55,685 --> 00:07:58,312 * Welcome to the good life * 197 00:07:58,354 --> 00:07:59,647 - [sighs happily] 198 00:07:59,689 --> 00:08:01,649 [cell phone chimes, vibrates] 199 00:08:01,691 --> 00:08:04,068 Ooh, hello, Nate. 200 00:08:08,823 --> 00:08:10,783 No, you can't have anyone over. 201 00:08:10,825 --> 00:08:13,244 Don't do it, Jillian. Don't do it, don't do it. 202 00:08:13,286 --> 00:08:15,246 Don't do it, don't do it, don't do it, don't do it, 203 00:08:15,288 --> 00:08:16,330 don't do it, don't do it. 204 00:08:16,372 --> 00:08:18,499 Hi! - Hi! 205 00:08:18,541 --> 00:08:21,210 Oh, my God. This house is amazing. 206 00:08:21,252 --> 00:08:23,046 [door closes] - Thank you. It's mine. 207 00:08:23,087 --> 00:08:26,007 - Oh, and I love these funky little shoes. 208 00:08:26,049 --> 00:08:27,508 - Oh, uh, these? 209 00:08:27,550 --> 00:08:28,926 I was just wearing them 210 00:08:28,968 --> 00:08:31,304 because, uh, my housekeeper made a mess on the floor. 211 00:08:31,345 --> 00:08:33,639 - Ew, what? Like, she had an accident? 212 00:08:33,681 --> 00:08:36,184 - Oh, my God, you're hilarious. 213 00:08:36,225 --> 00:08:38,186 No, she just had a really heavy walk. 214 00:08:38,227 --> 00:08:40,855 She's a real fucking pig, actually. 215 00:08:40,897 --> 00:08:42,982 [knock at door, door buzzes, lock clicks] 216 00:08:44,609 --> 00:08:47,862 - Oh, so you invited multiple dudes over? 217 00:08:47,904 --> 00:08:49,739 See, here I thought that I was special. 218 00:08:49,781 --> 00:08:51,908 - [laughs] No, I just ordered us some food. 219 00:08:51,949 --> 00:08:53,743 Thank you. - No problem. 220 00:08:53,785 --> 00:08:55,787 - Oh, wait, what's your Venmo name for the tip? 221 00:08:55,828 --> 00:08:57,371 - Oh, you can just tip him through the app. 222 00:08:57,413 --> 00:08:59,749 - Oh, yeah, but you never get the full tip that way. 223 00:08:59,791 --> 00:09:01,167 The app always takes a cut. - Oh. 224 00:09:01,209 --> 00:09:03,461 - Yeah, the handle is @SchmoneyTalks. 225 00:09:03,503 --> 00:09:06,714 - Well, thank you for the food, Mr. @SchmoneyTalks. 226 00:09:06,756 --> 00:09:08,925 - No, that's not actually my name. 227 00:09:08,966 --> 00:09:11,636 - No, I know. I was-- - My name's Theo Griffiths. 228 00:09:11,677 --> 00:09:13,096 - Thank you for the food, Theo Griffiths. 229 00:09:15,056 --> 00:09:16,808 - So nice how you did that tip thing. 230 00:09:16,849 --> 00:09:20,061 - Oh, I just have so much respect for working people. 231 00:09:20,103 --> 00:09:22,897 Can I get you some water? Oops. 232 00:09:22,939 --> 00:09:26,025 That's the food fridge. Drink fridge is over here. 233 00:09:28,653 --> 00:09:33,616 I know what you're thinking-- "Two fridges, she's so OCD." 234 00:09:33,658 --> 00:09:37,578 [laughs] - Okay, who are you? 235 00:09:37,620 --> 00:09:38,913 - What do you mean? 236 00:09:38,955 --> 00:09:41,416 - I mean, you have an extra fridge 237 00:09:41,457 --> 00:09:42,875 just for bottled water, 238 00:09:42,917 --> 00:09:44,877 but then you also have a spiritual connection 239 00:09:44,919 --> 00:09:47,213 with the Postmates guy named SchmoneyTalks. 240 00:09:47,255 --> 00:09:49,674 - His name is Theo Griffiths. - Yeah. 241 00:09:51,008 --> 00:09:53,094 You just seem down to earth. 242 00:09:53,136 --> 00:09:54,679 It's just... 243 00:09:54,721 --> 00:09:56,264 who are you? 244 00:09:56,305 --> 00:09:59,892 - Oh, I guess I just am who I am. 245 00:09:59,934 --> 00:10:02,228 Just me, just Jillian. 246 00:10:02,270 --> 00:10:03,980 - [chuckles] 247 00:10:04,021 --> 00:10:06,190 And what's this all about? 248 00:10:06,232 --> 00:10:07,358 - Oh, God, cat's cradle. 249 00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:09,610 I didn't really realize I was doing it. 250 00:10:09,652 --> 00:10:11,112 It's so dorky. 251 00:10:11,154 --> 00:10:13,448 - No, no way. I think it's cute. 252 00:10:13,489 --> 00:10:15,366 - It's just something my mom taught me to do 253 00:10:15,408 --> 00:10:17,994 when I was little to calm me down when I feel nervous. 254 00:10:18,035 --> 00:10:22,039 - Oh, what's there to be nervous about right now? 255 00:10:22,081 --> 00:10:25,877 - Um, I could--I can teach you how to do it if you want. 256 00:10:25,918 --> 00:10:28,671 I could show you how to do a classic cat's cradle. 257 00:10:28,713 --> 00:10:30,339 - Yeah, sure. - Okay, great. 258 00:10:30,381 --> 00:10:31,799 Um... 259 00:10:31,841 --> 00:10:34,135 - Is this right? - Yeah, just-- 260 00:10:34,177 --> 00:10:35,595 - You can touch. 261 00:10:35,636 --> 00:10:37,221 - Okay. So put your hands there. 262 00:10:37,263 --> 00:10:38,514 - Yeah. 263 00:10:38,556 --> 00:10:40,725 - You just wrap around your hands like that. 264 00:10:40,767 --> 00:10:42,810 - Okay. - Then... 265 00:10:42,852 --> 00:10:44,729 - Ooh. - Loop it around. 266 00:10:44,771 --> 00:10:47,982 And then, um, bring this hand in here. 267 00:10:48,024 --> 00:10:49,275 - Like this? - Yeah. 268 00:10:49,317 --> 00:10:51,194 The middle finger, and pull it through, 269 00:10:51,235 --> 00:10:55,281 and then you're gonna bring this finger in there. 270 00:10:55,323 --> 00:10:57,533 [soft music] 271 00:10:57,575 --> 00:10:59,577 - Oh. - Perfect. 272 00:10:59,619 --> 00:11:03,414 Um, I'm gonna grab these. 273 00:11:03,456 --> 00:11:04,749 Don't let go. 274 00:11:04,791 --> 00:11:08,336 * * 275 00:11:08,378 --> 00:11:09,879 [alarm blaring] 276 00:11:09,921 --> 00:11:11,255 - What's that? 277 00:11:11,297 --> 00:11:13,299 - I don't know, actually. I'll be right back. 278 00:11:19,222 --> 00:11:21,682 - Hi, Jillian. It's me, Sloane. 279 00:11:21,724 --> 00:11:24,852 Just wondering, why is there a man in my house? 280 00:11:24,894 --> 00:11:27,772 - [whispering] Oh, shit. 281 00:11:33,236 --> 00:11:34,946 - I have a camera on my cat feeder. 282 00:11:34,987 --> 00:11:36,531 So I'm checking on my sweet Gigi, 283 00:11:36,572 --> 00:11:38,741 and I see some random-ass guy is there with you. 284 00:11:38,783 --> 00:11:41,536 - I know, I'm sorry. It's just-- 285 00:11:41,577 --> 00:11:42,912 Fuck. 286 00:11:42,954 --> 00:11:44,914 This guy, Nate, 287 00:11:44,956 --> 00:11:47,542 he thinks I'm rich, and I really like him, 288 00:11:47,583 --> 00:11:49,001 and so I pretended I was you 289 00:11:49,043 --> 00:11:50,920 because you are rich and fabulous. 290 00:11:50,962 --> 00:11:52,130 And this was all a huge mistake, 291 00:11:52,171 --> 00:11:53,423 and I'll get him to leave right now. 292 00:11:53,464 --> 00:11:55,091 - No, no, no. Do not let him leave. 293 00:11:55,133 --> 00:11:57,760 Girl, I love this for you. 294 00:11:57,802 --> 00:11:59,178 But what's holding you back 295 00:11:59,220 --> 00:12:00,722 from showing him your true self? 296 00:12:00,763 --> 00:12:02,890 - Oh. 297 00:12:05,476 --> 00:12:07,270 I don't know. 298 00:12:07,311 --> 00:12:09,939 I guess part of me feels like I don't deserve him. 299 00:12:09,981 --> 00:12:11,274 - Mm-mm, no, don't do that. 300 00:12:11,315 --> 00:12:13,234 I want you to listen to me, Jillian. 301 00:12:13,276 --> 00:12:16,446 You are enough, but also that might not be enough. 302 00:12:16,487 --> 00:12:18,656 So I'm gonna help you transform yourself 303 00:12:18,698 --> 00:12:20,616 and get this man. 304 00:12:20,658 --> 00:12:21,951 - Wait, really? 305 00:12:21,993 --> 00:12:25,121 - Of course. I love helping people. 306 00:12:25,163 --> 00:12:26,956 I'll be like your fairy godmother. 307 00:12:26,998 --> 00:12:28,332 - Are you gonna make me a gown? 308 00:12:28,374 --> 00:12:30,209 - A gown, yes, that's a great idea. 309 00:12:30,251 --> 00:12:32,920 Pick me up and bring me to the closet. 310 00:12:32,962 --> 00:12:36,466 Okay, we're looking for something flirty and fun. 311 00:12:36,507 --> 00:12:38,009 - I like this yellow one. 312 00:12:38,051 --> 00:12:40,094 - Ugh, that's not right for this at all. 313 00:12:40,136 --> 00:12:41,804 You can just keep that one if you want. 314 00:12:41,846 --> 00:12:43,765 - Wait, are you serious? I can have it? 315 00:12:43,806 --> 00:12:46,642 - Yes, I went to this Buddhism retreat last year, 316 00:12:46,684 --> 00:12:48,644 and it completely changed my outlook. 317 00:12:48,686 --> 00:12:51,522 I'm not attached to material things at all anymore. 318 00:12:51,564 --> 00:12:54,442 [chuckles] Oh, hold up the coral one. 319 00:12:54,484 --> 00:12:56,069 I want to see it against your skin. 320 00:12:56,110 --> 00:12:58,654 - Wait, you can see me? Do you have cameras in here? 321 00:12:58,696 --> 00:13:01,282 - Sorry, the insurance company made me install them 322 00:13:01,324 --> 00:13:02,867 because, I don't know, 323 00:13:02,909 --> 00:13:05,328 some of the stuff in here is expensive, I guess. 324 00:13:05,369 --> 00:13:08,122 [chuckles] That dress is so you. 325 00:13:08,164 --> 00:13:10,041 - Jillian, you okay? - Yeah! 326 00:13:10,083 --> 00:13:12,126 Sorry, was just changing my outfit! 327 00:13:12,168 --> 00:13:13,628 My old one smelled like shit! 328 00:13:13,669 --> 00:13:14,879 - Un, okay. - What? 329 00:13:14,921 --> 00:13:16,923 - Jesus, Jillian, what was that? 330 00:13:16,964 --> 00:13:18,174 - I don't know. 331 00:13:18,216 --> 00:13:19,926 I just get so flustered around him. 332 00:13:19,967 --> 00:13:22,261 I panicked and told the truth. - Oh, I can help with that. 333 00:13:22,303 --> 00:13:24,347 Listen, there's a Bluetooth headset by my bed. 334 00:13:24,389 --> 00:13:26,307 Pair it with your phone and then call me. 335 00:13:26,349 --> 00:13:29,352 I can be in your ear while you flirt with him. 336 00:13:29,394 --> 00:13:31,020 Oh, my God. This is gonna be so fun! 337 00:13:31,062 --> 00:13:32,480 - Won't he think something's up 338 00:13:32,522 --> 00:13:34,690 if I have a headset in my ear the whole time? 339 00:13:34,732 --> 00:13:36,484 - No, all you have to tell him is... 340 00:13:36,526 --> 00:13:38,194 - I'm on the board of a charity. 341 00:13:38,236 --> 00:13:40,113 I forgot it's our quarterly meeting. 342 00:13:40,154 --> 00:13:41,280 I don't have to talk, 343 00:13:41,322 --> 00:13:42,824 but I do have to stay on the call 344 00:13:42,865 --> 00:13:44,534 because it's one of those annoying ones 345 00:13:44,575 --> 00:13:46,744 where they take attendance at the beginning 346 00:13:46,786 --> 00:13:49,455 and at the end. - [chuckles] 347 00:13:49,497 --> 00:13:52,333 Wow, you look... 348 00:13:52,375 --> 00:13:53,334 Wow. 349 00:13:53,376 --> 00:13:54,585 - Yeah, she does. - Thank you. 350 00:13:54,627 --> 00:13:56,212 - Now walk past him to the couch, 351 00:13:56,254 --> 00:13:58,214 but give him a sexy look. 352 00:13:58,256 --> 00:13:59,632 Let him check you out. 353 00:13:59,674 --> 00:14:01,384 Let's show him what you got, mama. 354 00:14:01,426 --> 00:14:03,261 Work it, Jillian, work it. 355 00:14:03,302 --> 00:14:05,555 - Um, hey, so I think I'm getting the hang of it. 356 00:14:05,596 --> 00:14:07,515 Check it out. 357 00:14:07,557 --> 00:14:10,268 Like this, see? 358 00:14:10,309 --> 00:14:12,937 It's so cool your mom taught you this. 359 00:14:12,979 --> 00:14:14,605 What's she like? 360 00:14:14,647 --> 00:14:17,942 - She's really nice, or she was before she died. 361 00:14:17,984 --> 00:14:20,862 I've never met her ghost, so I don't what she's like now. 362 00:14:20,903 --> 00:14:22,947 - I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to-- 363 00:14:22,989 --> 00:14:26,200 - No, it's fine. It's just reality. 364 00:14:26,242 --> 00:14:28,369 Both of my parents passed when I was pretty young, 365 00:14:28,411 --> 00:14:31,080 and I've sort of been on my own since then. 366 00:14:31,122 --> 00:14:32,457 - That must have been really hard. 367 00:14:32,498 --> 00:14:33,833 - Wait, are those his original teeth? 368 00:14:33,875 --> 00:14:35,293 - What? - What? 369 00:14:35,334 --> 00:14:37,754 - All truly rich people have fake teeth. 370 00:14:37,795 --> 00:14:39,922 Ask him, "Who did your teeth?" 371 00:14:39,964 --> 00:14:41,507 - Who did your teeth? 372 00:14:41,549 --> 00:14:43,843 - What do you-- I mean, these are my teeth. 373 00:14:43,885 --> 00:14:45,261 They're my normal teeth. 374 00:14:45,303 --> 00:14:47,263 - Oh, so he is not that rich. - Oh, my God, why? 375 00:14:47,305 --> 00:14:49,265 Is something wrong with my teeth? 376 00:14:49,307 --> 00:14:51,017 I've been meaning to get them whitened. 377 00:14:51,059 --> 00:14:52,602 I just heard that it really hurts. 378 00:14:52,643 --> 00:14:54,270 - You know, I heard that there are some sticks 379 00:14:54,312 --> 00:14:55,772 that are natural tooth whiteners. 380 00:14:55,813 --> 00:14:57,148 I'm not sure which ones. 381 00:14:57,190 --> 00:14:58,775 - Jesus Christ, why are we talking about sticks? 382 00:14:58,816 --> 00:15:00,318 Take out your phone, 383 00:15:00,359 --> 00:15:02,278 and pretend you're controlling the sound system. 384 00:15:02,320 --> 00:15:04,530 - Um, hey, would you like to listen to some music, Nate? 385 00:15:04,572 --> 00:15:05,782 - We need to find a seductive song. 386 00:15:05,823 --> 00:15:07,158 - Yeah, yeah. 387 00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:08,826 - [gasps] This is perfect, good, okay. 388 00:15:08,868 --> 00:15:10,787 Listen, George loves it when I do a little dance 389 00:15:10,828 --> 00:15:12,288 for him in his chair. 390 00:15:12,330 --> 00:15:15,583 Why don't you get up? Get up and dance. 391 00:15:15,625 --> 00:15:18,127 Just be loose. 392 00:15:18,169 --> 00:15:19,587 Mm, it's too stiff. 393 00:15:19,629 --> 00:15:22,632 Thrust in circles like you're hula-hooping. 394 00:15:22,673 --> 00:15:24,717 No, not like you're literally hula-hooping. 395 00:15:24,759 --> 00:15:26,302 What are you doing with your face? 396 00:15:26,344 --> 00:15:28,388 Oh, my God, you are fucking this up, Jillian. 397 00:15:28,429 --> 00:15:30,348 Try this--run one hand through your hair 398 00:15:30,390 --> 00:15:32,183 like you're shampooing. 399 00:15:32,225 --> 00:15:34,811 Jesus Christ, not like you have lice, Jillian-- 400 00:15:34,852 --> 00:15:36,187 sexy shampooing. 401 00:15:36,229 --> 00:15:38,481 - Is everything okay? - Perfect job, Jillian. 402 00:15:38,523 --> 00:15:39,899 You absolutely blew it. - Yes, sorry. 403 00:15:39,941 --> 00:15:41,401 I was doing this as a joke. 404 00:15:41,442 --> 00:15:43,152 I thought it would be funny, but it's not, so I'll stop. 405 00:15:43,194 --> 00:15:45,113 - No, it's so funny. 406 00:15:45,154 --> 00:15:46,989 - * She's so lovely * 407 00:15:47,031 --> 00:15:49,325 * She's so high... * 408 00:15:49,367 --> 00:15:51,327 - This got really weird. 409 00:15:51,369 --> 00:15:53,204 Did I fuck things up by bringing up your mom? 410 00:15:53,246 --> 00:15:54,831 - No, that was fine. 411 00:15:54,872 --> 00:15:56,040 I thought I fucked things up 412 00:15:56,082 --> 00:15:57,125 by all asking you about your teeth. 413 00:15:57,166 --> 00:15:58,501 - Oh, no. 414 00:15:58,543 --> 00:16:00,545 - They're really great, by the way. 415 00:16:00,586 --> 00:16:04,132 - I'm glad, um... 416 00:16:04,173 --> 00:16:06,509 'cause here they come. 417 00:16:06,551 --> 00:16:08,052 God, sorry. 418 00:16:08,094 --> 00:16:11,013 That--that--made that seem like I was gonna come bite you. 419 00:16:11,055 --> 00:16:12,557 I'm not gonna bite you. 420 00:16:12,598 --> 00:16:16,936 No, I just want to put my mouth on your mouth? 421 00:16:16,978 --> 00:16:18,604 I might stop there-- 422 00:16:18,646 --> 00:16:21,524 - Oh, Sloane, I love that she made the first move. 423 00:16:21,566 --> 00:16:23,276 - Okay. That was my friend Daphne. 424 00:16:23,317 --> 00:16:24,861 I told some of the girls at the event about you. 425 00:16:24,902 --> 00:16:26,529 They think it's so cute. 426 00:16:26,571 --> 00:16:29,198 - Hi, Jillian. Put your hand on his thigh. 427 00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:32,702 Don't touch his dick, but don't not touch it, you know. 428 00:16:32,744 --> 00:16:35,121 - I am so sorry, but I really need to go pee. 429 00:16:35,163 --> 00:16:37,832 I'll be right back. - Okay, kick-ass. 430 00:16:37,874 --> 00:16:40,001 * * 431 00:16:40,043 --> 00:16:44,797 - [sighing] 432 00:16:44,839 --> 00:16:46,299 - Hi, Jillian. 433 00:16:46,340 --> 00:16:49,844 - Oh, shit, you're here. That's fun. 434 00:16:49,886 --> 00:16:52,722 - Hey, why did you walk out? It was just getting good. 435 00:16:52,764 --> 00:16:54,599 - I'm sorry-- it's just so hard for me 436 00:16:54,640 --> 00:16:56,392 to focus with all these different voices in my head. 437 00:16:56,434 --> 00:16:57,852 - Yes, of course. 438 00:16:57,894 --> 00:16:59,562 Think about how hard this must be for Jillian. 439 00:16:59,604 --> 00:17:00,980 I'm gonna be the only one who talks. 440 00:17:01,022 --> 00:17:02,231 - What? - Not fair. 441 00:17:02,273 --> 00:17:04,817 - She's my project. I found her. 442 00:17:04,859 --> 00:17:07,445 - I think having anyone in my ear is a bit much. 443 00:17:07,487 --> 00:17:09,697 This is all just so weird. 444 00:17:09,739 --> 00:17:12,575 - Wow. Okay. 445 00:17:12,617 --> 00:17:14,786 Well, I'm at a charity event right now 446 00:17:14,827 --> 00:17:17,497 where people are actually in need of my help. 447 00:17:17,538 --> 00:17:21,000 So I guess if this is too weird for you, Jillian, 448 00:17:21,042 --> 00:17:23,503 I'll go back to them, and you can go back 449 00:17:23,544 --> 00:17:25,630 to being a TaskRabbit who follows directions 450 00:17:25,671 --> 00:17:27,173 when they're told not to bring anybody over. 451 00:17:27,215 --> 00:17:29,133 - I'm so, so sorry! 452 00:17:29,175 --> 00:17:31,886 - No. Ha, okay. No, I'm sorry. 453 00:17:31,928 --> 00:17:33,763 [chuckles] Girl, that's on me. 454 00:17:33,805 --> 00:17:35,306 All I've had today is a kale pill, 455 00:17:35,348 --> 00:17:37,433 and I think I'm just hangry. - Oh. 456 00:17:37,475 --> 00:17:38,810 - I know, I know, I know. Okay, you know what? 457 00:17:38,851 --> 00:17:40,436 Why don't you just ditch the earpiece 458 00:17:40,478 --> 00:17:41,687 and go out there and have some fun? 459 00:17:41,729 --> 00:17:43,856 - Yes, absolutely. - Right? 460 00:17:43,898 --> 00:17:45,358 - Yes, we've taken you as far as we can. 461 00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:46,818 The rest is up to you. 462 00:17:46,859 --> 00:17:48,152 - Thank you. 463 00:17:48,194 --> 00:17:49,570 - Of course, we're still gonna be 464 00:17:49,612 --> 00:17:51,114 watching you, though, in case you need help. 465 00:17:51,155 --> 00:17:53,199 - Oh, okay, cool. 466 00:17:54,450 --> 00:17:56,285 Sorry that took so long. 467 00:17:56,327 --> 00:17:58,121 - No problem. 468 00:17:58,162 --> 00:17:59,497 - I wasn't peeing the whole time. 469 00:17:59,539 --> 00:18:01,290 It's just that I have a really nice bathroom, 470 00:18:01,332 --> 00:18:03,835 and I love spending time in there. 471 00:18:03,876 --> 00:18:05,378 - How nice are we talking? 472 00:18:05,420 --> 00:18:09,924 * * 473 00:18:09,966 --> 00:18:12,343 both: Heated floors. 474 00:18:12,385 --> 00:18:14,846 * * 475 00:18:14,887 --> 00:18:16,264 [alarm blares] 476 00:18:16,305 --> 00:18:18,099 - Oh, God, I'm sorry. 477 00:18:18,141 --> 00:18:20,101 I don't know why this keeps happening. 478 00:18:20,143 --> 00:18:22,645 [blaring continues] 479 00:18:22,687 --> 00:18:24,647 I thought you said it was up to me now. 480 00:18:24,689 --> 00:18:26,023 - Okay, it's not all about you. 481 00:18:26,065 --> 00:18:27,358 My gardener, Santos, is here. 482 00:18:27,400 --> 00:18:28,693 I saw him on the cameras outside, 483 00:18:28,735 --> 00:18:30,027 and I need you to talk to him. 484 00:18:30,069 --> 00:18:32,864 He is using his gas-powered leaf blower, 485 00:18:32,905 --> 00:18:34,866 not the eco-friendly electric one. 486 00:18:34,907 --> 00:18:36,659 You need to go tell him to switch. 487 00:18:36,701 --> 00:18:38,369 - [sighs] 488 00:18:38,411 --> 00:18:41,330 I was kind of having a moment with Nate. 489 00:18:41,372 --> 00:18:44,375 - I saw, very indie-movie cute, 490 00:18:44,417 --> 00:18:47,628 but the environment is just so important to me. 491 00:18:47,670 --> 00:18:49,047 - Okay. 492 00:18:49,088 --> 00:18:51,799 But who do I tell Santos I am? He knows I'm not you. 493 00:18:51,841 --> 00:18:54,177 - No, he doesn't. We've never actually met. 494 00:18:54,218 --> 00:18:56,012 I always just text with him. 495 00:18:56,054 --> 00:18:58,473 - What do I even say to him? - Oh, don't be nervous. 496 00:18:58,514 --> 00:18:59,807 Just put the Bluetooth in, 497 00:18:59,849 --> 00:19:01,476 and I'll tell you exactly what to say. 498 00:19:01,517 --> 00:19:03,686 [leaf blower whirring] 499 00:19:09,025 --> 00:19:14,072 - [bad American accent] Hot dog, hot dog, hot dog. 500 00:19:14,113 --> 00:19:15,740 [normal voice] Perfect. 501 00:19:18,743 --> 00:19:20,745 [bad American accent] Hi, I'm Sloane Faulkner. 502 00:19:20,787 --> 00:19:22,580 We've texted. - Hi, it's nice to meet you. 503 00:19:22,622 --> 00:19:24,373 - Ugh, ditch the accent. 504 00:19:24,415 --> 00:19:26,334 - [normal voice] Um, would you mind using 505 00:19:26,375 --> 00:19:27,919 the electric leaf blower? 506 00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:29,879 - I was going to, but you didn't charge it. 507 00:19:29,921 --> 00:19:32,548 - I'm sorry, is it my job to plug in the leaf blower? 508 00:19:32,590 --> 00:19:34,801 - Is it my job to plug in the leaf blower? 509 00:19:34,842 --> 00:19:36,135 - I would've done it, Miss Faulkner. 510 00:19:36,177 --> 00:19:38,346 - Oh, you can call me Sloane. - No, he can't. 511 00:19:38,388 --> 00:19:39,597 - You didn't give me the garage code. 512 00:19:39,639 --> 00:19:41,057 You said you husband's storing art in there. 513 00:19:41,099 --> 00:19:42,558 - Ask him, "Who works for who here?" 514 00:19:42,600 --> 00:19:44,852 - Is that it? - Who works for who here? 515 00:19:44,894 --> 00:19:45,978 [both laugh] 516 00:19:46,020 --> 00:19:48,898 - I work for you, but I can't do my job 517 00:19:48,940 --> 00:19:50,608 unless you tell me what you want, 518 00:19:50,650 --> 00:19:52,110 and you listen to me when I tell you what I need. 519 00:19:52,151 --> 00:19:53,694 - Okay, well, now you have to fire him. 520 00:19:53,736 --> 00:19:54,654 - What? 521 00:19:54,695 --> 00:19:55,905 - We should have a conversation. 522 00:19:55,947 --> 00:19:59,283 - Hey, everything okay? You never came back. 523 00:19:59,325 --> 00:20:00,576 - Fire this guy, Jillian. - Sloane. 524 00:20:00,618 --> 00:20:02,370 - Do it. Fire him. 525 00:20:02,412 --> 00:20:03,746 - Who's Sloane? - Fire him, fire him. 526 00:20:03,788 --> 00:20:05,248 - He calls me by my last name. 527 00:20:05,289 --> 00:20:06,874 I run my home like a sports team. 528 00:20:06,916 --> 00:20:08,876 - You are my rabbit, and this is your task. 529 00:20:08,918 --> 00:20:10,795 - Can I go back to work? - Now, do it now. 530 00:20:10,837 --> 00:20:12,922 - Jillian, are you okay? - Sloane? 531 00:20:12,964 --> 00:20:14,924 - This is an order, Jillian. Fire him, do it. 532 00:20:14,966 --> 00:20:17,093 - You're fired. - Thank you. 533 00:20:17,135 --> 00:20:18,720 - What? 534 00:20:18,761 --> 00:20:21,764 - I'm sorry, Santos. You're fired. 535 00:20:21,806 --> 00:20:24,183 And, Nate, I have to go to the bathroom again, 536 00:20:24,225 --> 00:20:25,852 and I won't tell you why. 537 00:20:27,687 --> 00:20:29,272 I'm gonna tell Nate to leave. 538 00:20:29,313 --> 00:20:31,983 This has all gotten so complicated. 539 00:20:32,024 --> 00:20:33,568 Are you crying? 540 00:20:33,609 --> 00:20:34,902 - [crying] Thank you so much for noticing. 541 00:20:34,944 --> 00:20:36,779 I'm just really overwhelmed right now. 542 00:20:36,821 --> 00:20:38,781 I don't know if you've ever fired anybody, 543 00:20:38,823 --> 00:20:40,783 but it is so much harder than being fired. 544 00:20:40,825 --> 00:20:43,077 When you fire somebody, you're the bad guy, 545 00:20:43,119 --> 00:20:44,454 but you know me, Ginny. 546 00:20:44,495 --> 00:20:45,955 I'm not the bad guy. 547 00:20:45,997 --> 00:20:48,499 - You could always give him his job back. 548 00:20:48,541 --> 00:20:49,959 - Mm, I feel like 549 00:20:50,001 --> 00:20:52,003 that would just be so uncomfortable for him. 550 00:20:52,045 --> 00:20:53,963 Should we send him some flowers? 551 00:20:54,005 --> 00:20:56,299 Maybe he'd like, like, a little palm tree or something. 552 00:20:56,340 --> 00:20:57,633 I mean, we know he loves plants. 553 00:20:57,675 --> 00:20:59,302 [doorbell rings] Oh, shit, what was that? 554 00:20:59,343 --> 00:21:00,720 - The doorbell. 555 00:21:00,762 --> 00:21:03,347 - The doorbell! Go, go, go, go, go, go, go! 556 00:21:04,974 --> 00:21:06,976 - Hey, Jillian. 557 00:21:07,018 --> 00:21:09,145 This is Agent Grady from the IRS. 558 00:21:09,187 --> 00:21:12,315 She's looking for somebody named Sloane Faulkner, 559 00:21:12,356 --> 00:21:14,984 but don't worry--I told her nobody by that name lives here. 560 00:21:20,490 --> 00:21:22,617 - So nobody named Sloane resides here? 561 00:21:22,658 --> 00:21:24,285 - Well, her last name is Sloane. 562 00:21:24,327 --> 00:21:26,621 - Yes, that is true. 563 00:21:26,662 --> 00:21:28,790 But I also have a friend named Sloane 564 00:21:28,831 --> 00:21:31,334 who's my roommate in this house. 565 00:21:31,375 --> 00:21:33,378 Everyone calls it the Sloane Shack. 566 00:21:33,419 --> 00:21:35,713 Our friends are hilarious. 567 00:21:35,755 --> 00:21:38,341 - And does a George Faulkner reside here as well? 568 00:21:38,383 --> 00:21:40,009 - Yes, he's my other roommate. 569 00:21:40,051 --> 00:21:41,803 We're always getting into arguments 570 00:21:41,844 --> 00:21:44,389 over who does the dishes. 571 00:21:44,430 --> 00:21:45,932 - Okay. 572 00:21:45,973 --> 00:21:48,226 But neither Sloane nor George Faulkner 573 00:21:48,267 --> 00:21:49,435 is here currently? 574 00:21:49,477 --> 00:21:51,145 - No, they just left, 575 00:21:51,187 --> 00:21:54,107 over that argument I just told you about, about the dishes. 576 00:21:54,148 --> 00:21:56,526 They did they didn't say where they were going, 577 00:21:56,567 --> 00:22:00,696 but they stormed out and said, "We're staying in Florida!" 578 00:22:00,738 --> 00:22:03,241 [tense music] 579 00:22:03,282 --> 00:22:04,575 - Thank you for your time. 580 00:22:04,617 --> 00:22:05,743 * * 581 00:22:05,785 --> 00:22:07,328 [camera shutter clicks] 582 00:22:07,370 --> 00:22:09,205 - I don-- 583 00:22:09,247 --> 00:22:10,957 - Wait, you have roommates? 584 00:22:10,998 --> 00:22:13,668 - Yes, but not because I'm poor, 585 00:22:13,710 --> 00:22:15,878 because they're poor and I'm nice. 586 00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:17,255 [alarm blaring] Oh, sorry. 587 00:22:17,296 --> 00:22:19,173 It's that alarm again. I'll just be one sec. 588 00:22:19,215 --> 00:22:20,675 It's a whole thing. You get it. 589 00:22:20,717 --> 00:22:22,969 - Yes. Yeah, yeah, I get it. 590 00:22:23,010 --> 00:22:25,304 - What the fuck did you just do to me, Jillian? 591 00:22:25,346 --> 00:22:26,681 - I didn't have a choice. 592 00:22:26,723 --> 00:22:28,224 If I said I was Sloane, Nate would've known 593 00:22:28,266 --> 00:22:30,017 I'd been lying to him this whole time. 594 00:22:30,059 --> 00:22:32,895 - So? You think I give a slick shit about you 595 00:22:32,937 --> 00:22:34,856 and your middle-class love puppy 596 00:22:34,897 --> 00:22:36,899 with his original fucking teeth? 597 00:22:36,941 --> 00:22:38,985 - Is it really that bad to have your own teeth? 598 00:22:39,026 --> 00:22:40,236 - Well, George had his own teeth 599 00:22:40,278 --> 00:22:42,447 until he started losing them at age 85. 600 00:22:42,488 --> 00:22:44,157 So you tell me, sweetheart. 601 00:22:44,198 --> 00:22:45,825 - How old is George? 602 00:22:45,867 --> 00:22:48,369 - He's 89, and now I get to watch every night 603 00:22:48,411 --> 00:22:50,663 as he takes his whole entire mouth out 604 00:22:50,705 --> 00:22:52,373 and puts it in a fucking glass. 605 00:22:52,415 --> 00:22:54,959 - Okay, well, I'm sorry, but this really isn't my fault. 606 00:22:55,001 --> 00:22:56,335 - Of course it's your fault! 607 00:22:56,377 --> 00:22:58,296 - Maybe if you hadn't made me fire Santos, 608 00:22:58,337 --> 00:23:00,381 or maybe if you'd actually lived in Florida 609 00:23:00,423 --> 00:23:02,341 for 183 days this year... 610 00:23:02,383 --> 00:23:04,177 - I was working on my mental health! 611 00:23:04,218 --> 00:23:08,056 Ugh! I was just about to give a million dollars to charity. 612 00:23:08,097 --> 00:23:10,683 But now I guess I'm gonna donate that money 613 00:23:10,725 --> 00:23:12,935 to the U.S. fucking government. 614 00:23:12,977 --> 00:23:14,437 - Uh, actually, Sloane, you do need 615 00:23:14,479 --> 00:23:16,272 to make those charitable donations, 616 00:23:16,314 --> 00:23:18,357 because if you don't, it makes the taxes go even higher. 617 00:23:18,399 --> 00:23:21,611 - It makes the taxes go even higher, Jillian! 618 00:23:21,652 --> 00:23:23,071 - I thought you said you're a Buddhist 619 00:23:23,112 --> 00:23:24,864 and you weren't attached to material things! 620 00:23:24,906 --> 00:23:26,657 - Money doesn't count as material things. 621 00:23:26,699 --> 00:23:28,493 Money's all online now, whoo! 622 00:23:28,534 --> 00:23:31,829 I could sue you, but I obviously wouldn't get much. 623 00:23:31,871 --> 00:23:34,082 So I think I'm just gonna call the cops 624 00:23:34,123 --> 00:23:36,501 and tell them there's a strange man in my house. 625 00:23:36,542 --> 00:23:39,295 - Don't do that, Sloane. No. Shit. 626 00:23:39,337 --> 00:23:41,172 Sloane? Shit! 627 00:23:41,214 --> 00:23:44,592 Nate? - Jillian, is everything okay? 628 00:23:44,634 --> 00:23:46,636 - Nate, we really have to leave. 629 00:23:46,677 --> 00:23:48,388 - Why? What is happening? 630 00:23:48,429 --> 00:23:50,264 - I called the police. 631 00:23:50,306 --> 00:23:52,308 - Off, off, off, off, off, off! - Who's that? 632 00:23:52,350 --> 00:23:54,268 - Who am I? I'm Sloane Faulkner. 633 00:23:54,310 --> 00:23:56,771 And I'm the actual own-- 634 00:23:56,813 --> 00:23:59,357 - Jillian, what the fuck? 635 00:23:59,399 --> 00:24:01,192 - I'll explain everything to you once we're outside, 636 00:24:01,234 --> 00:24:02,568 but we really have to leave right now. 637 00:24:02,610 --> 00:24:04,112 - Why? Jillian-- - Fuck you. 638 00:24:04,153 --> 00:24:06,114 I can lock the doors remotely, Jillian. 639 00:24:06,155 --> 00:24:08,741 [door buzzes, lock clicks] You're not going anywhere. 640 00:24:08,783 --> 00:24:12,453 [music and alarm blaring] - What the hell? 641 00:24:12,495 --> 00:24:15,081 - Come on, come on, follow me! Come on, follow me! 642 00:24:15,123 --> 00:24:17,542 - Jillian! [door buzzes, lock clicks] 643 00:24:17,583 --> 00:24:19,293 - Damn it! 644 00:24:19,335 --> 00:24:21,671 - You're not getting away that easily. 645 00:24:21,713 --> 00:24:23,715 * * 646 00:24:23,756 --> 00:24:27,385 - Sloane, open up the doors and let us out right now, or... 647 00:24:29,679 --> 00:24:31,681 I will kill Gigi. [cat hisses] 648 00:24:31,723 --> 00:24:33,474 I hunt snakes for a living. 649 00:24:33,516 --> 00:24:35,727 You didn't know that, but that's, like, my main job, 650 00:24:35,768 --> 00:24:38,479 so I am fully capable of murdering a cat. 651 00:24:38,521 --> 00:24:42,358 - Yeah, I really don't care. Gigi's a clone anyway. 652 00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:44,485 So I can probably just call the lab and order a new one. 653 00:24:44,527 --> 00:24:46,487 Maybe the technology's gotten better, 654 00:24:46,529 --> 00:24:49,574 and this one won't have so many goddamn emotional prob-- 655 00:24:49,615 --> 00:24:51,701 [thud, locks click] 656 00:24:53,494 --> 00:24:54,912 - Hey. - Santos? 657 00:24:54,954 --> 00:24:57,623 - I cut the power. Now, hurry, you should go. 658 00:24:57,665 --> 00:24:59,292 [tense music] 659 00:24:59,333 --> 00:25:01,836 - Wait, why are you helping me? I just fired you. 660 00:25:01,878 --> 00:25:03,171 - I know you're not Mrs. Sloane. 661 00:25:03,212 --> 00:25:05,339 - You do? - I met that woman seven times. 662 00:25:05,381 --> 00:25:07,133 It's crazy she don't remember me. 663 00:25:07,175 --> 00:25:09,218 Now go! 664 00:25:09,260 --> 00:25:12,346 * * 665 00:25:12,388 --> 00:25:16,017 [both breathing heavily] 666 00:25:16,059 --> 00:25:17,685 - That was a lot. 667 00:25:17,727 --> 00:25:19,353 - Crazy first date, right? - Yeah. 668 00:25:19,395 --> 00:25:21,022 - But this is gonna be such a funny story 669 00:25:21,064 --> 00:25:22,273 to tell our friends. 670 00:25:22,315 --> 00:25:24,192 - Did you steal someone's identity? 671 00:25:24,233 --> 00:25:26,527 - No, I was asked to borrow someone's identity. 672 00:25:26,569 --> 00:25:28,029 I'm not some psychopath. 673 00:25:28,071 --> 00:25:30,198 - I mean, you said you kill snakes for a living? 674 00:25:30,239 --> 00:25:32,825 - Humanely. I always destroy their brains. 675 00:25:32,867 --> 00:25:35,411 - Okay, this is too weird. I'm gonna go. 676 00:25:35,453 --> 00:25:37,371 - Wait, no, just-- 677 00:25:37,413 --> 00:25:39,415 I know I lied to you. 678 00:25:39,457 --> 00:25:41,375 I swear I only did it because I thought 679 00:25:41,417 --> 00:25:45,254 if I told you the truth, you'd never want to see me again. 680 00:25:45,296 --> 00:25:46,756 But this is it. 681 00:25:49,258 --> 00:25:52,220 I don't actually own a billboard company. 682 00:25:52,261 --> 00:25:54,931 I just drive a billboard around for money. 683 00:25:54,972 --> 00:25:57,517 And then at night, I sleep in it. 684 00:25:57,558 --> 00:26:00,395 I have no home, no savings, 685 00:26:00,436 --> 00:26:03,439 and all of my clothes fit in this bag. 686 00:26:03,481 --> 00:26:05,733 But this is me, 687 00:26:05,775 --> 00:26:09,404 just a girl standing in front of a boy 688 00:26:09,445 --> 00:26:13,741 using her original teeth to ask for a second chance. 689 00:26:13,783 --> 00:26:15,910 [soft music] 690 00:26:15,952 --> 00:26:18,079 - Look, Jillian, I know everyone says money 691 00:26:18,121 --> 00:26:20,748 is the most important thing in the world, 692 00:26:20,790 --> 00:26:22,125 but there are some people out there 693 00:26:22,166 --> 00:26:24,961 that don't feel like that. 694 00:26:25,002 --> 00:26:28,131 I know you're gonna find one of them eventually. 695 00:26:28,172 --> 00:26:30,591 I think you should probably check online. 696 00:26:30,633 --> 00:26:32,093 - Wait, what? 697 00:26:32,135 --> 00:26:34,095 - It's really nice knowing you, Jillian Sloane. 698 00:26:36,180 --> 00:26:37,348 - Wha-- 699 00:26:40,643 --> 00:26:43,855 [soft music] 700 00:26:43,896 --> 00:26:51,028 * * 701 00:26:59,912 --> 00:27:03,916 [sighs] 702 00:27:03,958 --> 00:27:06,836 [knock at door] 703 00:27:06,878 --> 00:27:10,173 Nate? 704 00:27:10,214 --> 00:27:13,217 - I'm looking for a Jillian Glopp? 705 00:27:14,677 --> 00:27:16,345 - I'm Jillian Glopp. 706 00:27:16,387 --> 00:27:18,389 - I'm with the Miami Police Department. 707 00:27:18,431 --> 00:27:20,183 I'd like to talk to you about a fire. 708 00:27:20,224 --> 00:27:23,061 [suspenseful music] 709 00:27:25,146 --> 00:27:26,522 - I'd like to do a song 710 00:27:26,564 --> 00:27:28,775 of great social and political import. 711 00:27:28,816 --> 00:27:30,401 It goes like this. 712 00:27:32,945 --> 00:27:39,077 * Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz? * 713 00:27:39,118 --> 00:27:42,163 * My friends all drive Porsches * 714 00:27:42,205 --> 00:27:45,041 * I must make amends * 715 00:27:45,083 --> 00:27:47,835 * Worked hard all my lifetime * 716 00:27:47,877 --> 00:27:50,630 * No help from my friends * 717 00:27:50,671 --> 00:27:56,260 * So, oh, Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz? * 718 00:27:56,302 --> 00:28:01,766 * Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a color TV? * 719 00:28:01,808 --> 00:28:07,271 * "Dialing For Dollars" is trying to find me * 720 00:28:07,313 --> 00:28:12,652 * I wait for delivery each day until 3:00 * 721 00:28:12,693 --> 00:28:17,949 * So, oh, Lord, won't you buy me a color TV? * 722 00:28:17,990 --> 00:28:19,659 Everybody! 723 00:28:19,700 --> 00:28:24,247 * Oh, Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz? * 724 00:28:24,288 --> 00:28:27,041 * My friends all drive Porsches * 725 00:28:27,083 --> 00:28:29,585 * I must make amends * 726 00:28:29,627 --> 00:28:32,755 * Worked hard all my lifetime * 727 00:28:32,797 --> 00:28:34,966 * No help from my friends * 728 00:28:35,007 --> 00:28:42,140 * So, oh, Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz? * 729 00:28:44,267 --> 00:28:47,145 That's it. [laughs] 730 00:28:49,105 --> 00:28:51,149 - Not a doctor. - Shh.