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[soft piano music playing]
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00:00:46,654 --> 00:00:49,004
[Daniel] In Herman Williams'
seminal work on the joys
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00:00:49,004 --> 00:00:53,400
of being a model train
hobbyist, he writes,
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00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:55,446
"Many an hour have I spent
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00:00:55,446 --> 00:00:59,232
"blissfully lost in a world
of my own creation.
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"For the model train enthusiast,
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00:01:03,106 --> 00:01:07,719
"there exists a secret world
of order and symmetry.
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00:01:07,719 --> 00:01:11,549
"Nestled into the corners
of our basements and attics,
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"we lord over a world
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"where the hobbyist
plays omnipotent creator.
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00:01:18,382 --> 00:01:21,733
"There, in 1:87 scale,
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"the neighbors
are always kind,
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"the lovers
always end up together,
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"and the trains always
take you to the far-off places
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00:01:31,656 --> 00:01:34,137
"you always swore you'd go."
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In life, of course,
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nothing is nearly
as neat and tidy.
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[woman singing]
♪ Well, if you close the door ♪
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[piano music playing]
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♪ The night could
last forever ♪
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♪ And keep the sunshine out ♪
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♪ And say hello to never ♪
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♪ 'Cause all the people
are dancing ♪
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♪ And they're having such fun ♪
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00:02:04,906 --> 00:02:09,824
♪ I wish it could
happen to me ♪
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- [piano music pauses]
- [cheering, laughing]
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00:02:12,392 --> 00:02:17,441
- ♪ So baby close that door ♪
- [piano music resumes]
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♪ And never have to see
the day again ♪
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♪ Oh, yeah ♪
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♪ I'd never have to see
the day again ♪
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♪ That's right ♪
Sing!
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♪ I'd never have to see
the day again ♪
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[all whooping and cheering]
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- [plays glissando]
- Encore, Allie!
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- No!
- [others groan]
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I am way too drunk
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to be singing
in front of people.
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Aw, but we love you! Come on!
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And I wanna keep it that way.
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Um, okay. That was
for my beautiful, sweet,
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darling fiance, Nathan.
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[laughter]
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Who loves that song very much.
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Bubba, you wanna come up here?
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- No. [chuckles]
- [all laughing]
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[Allison] Come on!
It's our engagement party.
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He's very shy!
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[all chanting]
Nathan! Nathan! Nathan!
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Nathan! Nathan! Nathan! Nathan!
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[whooping]
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[guests] Mm! Ah! Mm!
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- Did you like it?
- It was amazing.
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[Nathan inhales deeply]
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- Hey, y'all...
- [laughter]
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Um, I'll just briefly say that
she played that song for me
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on our very first date
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on a beautiful,
old piano she found
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at the back of an empty bar.
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- Well, you better go, girl!
- Come on. Come on!
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- Always be closing.
- [Molly] Absolutely!
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Welcome to the family!
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- Allison... [chuckles]
- Yes... [chuckles]
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Every memory I cherish
in my life has you in it.
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Some of them
are just tiny seconds.
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The way you close one eye
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when you really wanna focus
on tasting something.
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- [guests laugh]
- I do that. I do that.
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I go, like...
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[guests laughing]
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[laughing]
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I can't believe this is real.
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It's real, baby.
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- Thank God.
- [Allison] Mm.
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- I love you.
- I love you.
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[all] Aw.
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- Okay.
- Hey...
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- Um... Drink, smoke, be merry.
- [man] Yeah.
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And if you choose
to sleep with Chip,
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make sure he wears,
like, 11 condoms.
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[all exclaiming]
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I'm, like, literally a virgin.
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- [others laughing]
- He's kidding. He's kidding.
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- ["Time" playing]
- ♪ Time keeps on coming ♪
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♪ I've been all around ♪
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[lighter clicking]
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♪ I'll keep on loving... ♪
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No! No, no, no.
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- No. Come on, baby. No phone.
- Oh.
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When we get married,
we have to make rules
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- about phones in the bed.
- [scoffs]
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Oh, shut up.
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You are on your phone,
like, ten times more than me,
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looking up rusty old trucks.
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Uh, a '67 cloth top Bronco
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is a work of art, baby.
It's not a truck.
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- I'm looking at art.
- Yeah. Oh.
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- Like this butt.
- [Allison laughing]
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I am so high
from that gummy you gave me.
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- What the fuck was that?
- [Nathan chuckling]
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I still can't feel my ankles.
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You don't need your ankles
right now.
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Yeah, but I would
still like to feel my ankles.
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Hey, come kiss me.
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- Hey, babe?
- Yeah?
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This creepy doctor
from my sales list
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is really trying to flirt
with me on Instagram.
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[inhales sharply] Maybe you
gave him the wrong impression.
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What?
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Come on! As if!
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I go in there, and I'm, like,
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waving
my engagement ring around.
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You always say, "Flirting
is a part of the job."
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Someone's bound to get
the wrong impression.
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It's very light flirting.
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- Ah, okay. [laughs]
- It is!
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It's like... It's just...
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It's sushi with a smile,
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so that he can write
the fucking prescription,
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and I can get a fat bonus,
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and then
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you and I can maybe one day
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move to the city.
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If we don't go to hell first.
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Oh! Why would you say that?
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- Come on!
- I'm sorry.
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I'm only pushing HUMIRA, like,
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I won't go to hell for
moderate to severe psoriasis.
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Come on.
That would be so unfair.
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Yeah, yeah.
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Shut up.
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- Okay. Hey.
- Mmm.
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It's just a stepping
stone, baby.
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I know.
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Do you think it's too late
for astronaut school?
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- [laughing]
- What?
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- What?
- Nothing.
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I could be
a professional dancer.
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- Oh, word?
- Yeah. Yeah.
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- You got them moves?
- Ooh.
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- [laughs]
- Wait, let me stand up.
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I'm way better
when I stand up.
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- Okay.
- It's so much better
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when I stand up.
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- Are you ready?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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- Whoa.
- What genre is this?
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I don't know,
but my body just goes...
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[Nathan] Go.
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Is this modern, right?
[laughs]
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- This is professional.
- Wow.
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00:07:04,292 --> 00:07:05,380
So I would appreciate it
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if you took me seriously
right now.
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I'm taking you very seriously.
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And then, we'll finish
with something like this.
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- [Allison humming]
- [laughs]
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But I'm not gonna
show you anymore,
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because it's
a work-in-progress.
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And the professional is tired,
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and I wanna cuddle.
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♪ Came into this life
on my own ♪
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♪And I'll try
Yes I'll try ♪
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♪ Hope for love
turn out the light ♪
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♪ And I gave my own life
My own life, my own life ♪
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[truck horn blaring]
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[Allison]
Oh, calm the fuck down.
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I swear, this road has been
under construction
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my entire life.
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When will New Jersey be done?
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- She's a work-in-progress.
- Never.
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[chuckles] Oh, by the way,
how's Ryan doing?
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Oh, you mean
your future niece?
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[gasps] Oh, my goodness.
She's so pretty!
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Yeah, the varsity coach said
she might start next year.
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00:08:01,349 --> 00:08:02,437
- Oh, yeah?
- [Jesse] Mmm-hmm.
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00:08:02,437 --> 00:08:04,744
She scored 19 goals
last season!
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00:08:04,744 --> 00:08:06,006
- Tell her. Tell her.
- Wow!
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00:08:06,006 --> 00:08:08,443
Oh, my God.
You must be so proud of her.
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I can't believe
I haven't met her.
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00:08:09,575 --> 00:08:10,750
I'm so sorry Nathan and I
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00:08:10,750 --> 00:08:12,099
haven't made it
down there yet.
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00:08:12,099 --> 00:08:13,579
Don't worry about it.
I mean, it's far.
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00:08:13,579 --> 00:08:14,798
We're gonna try to come up
more often
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now that our dad's
getting older.
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00:08:16,103 --> 00:08:17,888
[Allison] Yeah.
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00:08:17,888 --> 00:08:21,282
Well, I've only met
your dad a few times,
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00:08:21,282 --> 00:08:23,589
but that we can't blame
on distance. [chuckles]
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This is fucking nuts.
I'm sorry.
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00:08:27,506 --> 00:08:28,681
Wait, so tell us about
188
00:08:28,681 --> 00:08:30,378
these wedding dresses
we're seeing.
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00:08:30,378 --> 00:08:32,119
Yes, please. I couldn't sleep
last night thinking about it.
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00:08:32,119 --> 00:08:34,469
- [laughs] Shut up!
- You are such a good sport.
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00:08:34,469 --> 00:08:37,255
No, he isn't. He just thinks
that after we see dresses,
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00:08:37,255 --> 00:08:38,604
- we're going to go...
- Yeah?
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00:08:38,604 --> 00:08:39,779
- ...on a pub crawl.
- [Jesse] Mmm-hmm.
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00:08:39,779 --> 00:08:41,215
But actually
we're going to see a play.
195
00:08:41,215 --> 00:08:42,652
- You are?
- No, we're not.
196
00:08:42,652 --> 00:08:44,218
You said that we'd have
to get tickets already.
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00:08:44,218 --> 00:08:46,264
No. We just gotta see some
shit nobody else wants to see.
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00:08:46,264 --> 00:08:47,657
- [laughing]
- Oh, great. That's awesome.
199
00:08:47,657 --> 00:08:49,049
- Yeah, right?
- Great. Great.
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00:08:49,049 --> 00:08:51,051
Hey, look,
it's finally opening up.
201
00:08:51,051 --> 00:08:53,488
All right, so I think
it might be a little tight
202
00:08:53,488 --> 00:08:55,012
getting you to a play,
203
00:08:55,012 --> 00:08:58,537
but, um, let me just check...
204
00:09:01,409 --> 00:09:03,020
- Okay, so now it's saying...
- [back-up alarm bleeping]
205
00:09:03,020 --> 00:09:04,282
Allie!
206
00:09:04,282 --> 00:09:05,457
- [Jesse] Look out!
- [tires screech]
207
00:09:19,297 --> 00:09:20,690
[device chimes]
208
00:09:20,690 --> 00:09:22,169
Here we are.
209
00:09:22,169 --> 00:09:24,563
You got me here so early.
210
00:09:24,563 --> 00:09:26,696
Yeah, well, it's
211
00:09:26,696 --> 00:09:29,133
better to be a half-hour early
212
00:09:29,133 --> 00:09:30,700
than one minute late.
213
00:09:30,700 --> 00:09:32,527
[chuckles]
214
00:09:32,527 --> 00:09:34,573
Grandpa, have you ever played
any video games?
215
00:09:34,573 --> 00:09:36,357
- No. [scoffs]
- [chuckles]
216
00:09:37,707 --> 00:09:39,970
You've got that perfect
little brain up there
217
00:09:39,970 --> 00:09:42,581
and you're just melting it
away with that crap.
218
00:09:43,060 --> 00:09:44,627
Okay.
219
00:09:44,627 --> 00:09:45,845
- [automated voice] Nathan.
- [cell phone ringing]
220
00:09:45,845 --> 00:09:47,064
[Ryan] It's Uncle Nathan.
Answer it.
221
00:09:47,934 --> 00:09:49,414
Why would he be calling me?
222
00:09:50,807 --> 00:09:51,851
Pick it up.
223
00:09:56,464 --> 00:09:59,642
[sighs] Thought we weren't
talking anymore.
224
00:09:59,642 --> 00:10:01,644
[video game sound effects
playing]
225
00:10:10,783 --> 00:10:13,830
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Nathan. Nathan.
226
00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:16,310
I've... I've got
Ryan here in the car.
227
00:10:16,310 --> 00:10:18,095
I'm just dropping her off
at school.
228
00:10:18,095 --> 00:10:19,444
I'll call you right back.
229
00:10:21,751 --> 00:10:24,971
Yes, I heard what you said.
I'm headed right there.
230
00:10:24,971 --> 00:10:26,886
I just gotta
drop her off, okay?
231
00:10:29,672 --> 00:10:31,978
See, that wasn't so bad.
232
00:10:31,978 --> 00:10:34,459
Mom says she wishes you guys
could find a way to get along.
233
00:10:35,852 --> 00:10:38,071
I... I've...
I've got to leave, sweetie.
234
00:10:38,071 --> 00:10:40,160
But I look like a dork
being here this early.
235
00:10:40,160 --> 00:10:41,596
I'm sorry.
236
00:10:42,510 --> 00:10:43,511
I'll, uh...
237
00:10:44,338 --> 00:10:46,297
I'll be picking you up today.
238
00:10:46,297 --> 00:10:47,820
Why can't Mom?
239
00:10:47,820 --> 00:10:49,213
She said they'd be back
from the city today, right?
240
00:10:50,431 --> 00:10:51,563
Well...
241
00:10:53,608 --> 00:10:55,175
- she can't.
- [sighing] Okay.
242
00:10:55,175 --> 00:10:56,350
I'll text her.
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00:10:56,350 --> 00:10:57,656
[Daniel] Okay.
244
00:10:57,656 --> 00:10:59,136
Okay. Bye.
245
00:10:59,963 --> 00:11:01,312
Tell me you love me.
246
00:11:02,705 --> 00:11:04,663
I love you, Grandpa.
247
00:11:04,663 --> 00:11:06,099
I love you too.
248
00:11:06,099 --> 00:11:07,448
[chuckles]
249
00:11:08,754 --> 00:11:10,147
- Bye.
- Bye.
250
00:11:11,583 --> 00:11:13,585
[somber music playing]
251
00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:17,197
[car door closes]
252
00:11:23,073 --> 00:11:24,074
[sighs]
253
00:11:29,122 --> 00:11:31,516
[machine beeping]
254
00:11:31,516 --> 00:11:34,519
[Allison weakly] Mom,
my head hurts so much.
255
00:11:34,519 --> 00:11:37,914
I can't even explain
how much pain my head's in.
256
00:11:37,914 --> 00:11:39,437
[Diane] Can you click
on the morphine again?
257
00:11:39,437 --> 00:11:40,873
I've been clicking on it.
258
00:11:40,873 --> 00:11:43,049
I'm clicking on it,
and nothing is happening.
259
00:11:43,049 --> 00:11:44,355
Oh, shoot, you're right.
It is empty.
260
00:11:44,355 --> 00:11:45,704
We gotta get more.
261
00:11:45,704 --> 00:11:47,010
We'll have to get the nurse
to get us more.
262
00:11:47,010 --> 00:11:48,228
Nathan, why are you
looking at me like that?
263
00:11:48,707 --> 00:11:50,404
Like what?
264
00:11:50,404 --> 00:11:52,363
Is it bad? Do I look that bad?
265
00:11:52,363 --> 00:11:53,712
No, he's just upset, sweetheart.
266
00:11:53,712 --> 00:11:55,192
He's upset 'cause we've been
267
00:11:55,192 --> 00:11:56,671
- so worried all night long.
- [Allison] Okay. Okay.
268
00:11:56,671 --> 00:11:58,761
This backhoe thing
just reversed
269
00:11:58,761 --> 00:12:00,632
into the middle of the street.
270
00:12:00,632 --> 00:12:01,764
[Diane] I know, I know.
271
00:12:01,764 --> 00:12:03,417
[Allison] I didn't know
what to do.
272
00:12:03,417 --> 00:12:04,679
I know, but you don't have to
worry about that right now.
273
00:12:04,679 --> 00:12:06,203
- Right, Nathan?
- Yeah.
274
00:12:06,203 --> 00:12:07,726
No, you just need to focus
on getting better.
275
00:12:07,726 --> 00:12:08,814
That's all you need
to think about, okay?
276
00:12:08,814 --> 00:12:10,468
- [Allison] Okay.
- Right, Nathan?
277
00:12:10,468 --> 00:12:12,122
- Yeah.
- [Nurse] Sorry to interrupt,
278
00:12:12,122 --> 00:12:13,776
but the police are here
to collect a blood sample.
279
00:12:13,776 --> 00:12:15,125
Oh, no. Absolutely not.
280
00:12:15,125 --> 00:12:16,779
Now is not a good time.
She is in a lot of pain.
281
00:12:16,779 --> 00:12:18,345
- You have to come back.
- No.
282
00:12:18,345 --> 00:12:20,130
- [Nathan] She just woke up.
- Why are the police here?
283
00:12:20,130 --> 00:12:21,740
Unfortunately, I can't.
284
00:12:21,740 --> 00:12:24,090
Legally, the sample has to be
drawn as soon as possible.
285
00:12:24,090 --> 00:12:25,526
We waited for her
to stabilize,
286
00:12:25,526 --> 00:12:26,614
but with an accident
like this,
287
00:12:26,614 --> 00:12:28,007
it's imperative we test...
288
00:12:28,007 --> 00:12:29,748
What is he talking about?
It wasn't my fault.
289
00:12:29,748 --> 00:12:32,055
- Officer, she doesn't know.
- It wasn't her fault.
290
00:12:32,055 --> 00:12:33,360
With an accident
of this magnitude
291
00:12:33,360 --> 00:12:34,797
involving fatalities,
we're required...
292
00:12:34,797 --> 00:12:36,537
- She hasn't been told.
- Fatalities?
293
00:12:36,537 --> 00:12:37,843
She hasn't been told,
294
00:12:37,843 --> 00:12:39,236
- you fucking asshole!
- [whispers] Fuck.
295
00:12:39,236 --> 00:12:41,107
- [Diane] She didn't know.
- Mama, what's going on?
296
00:12:41,107 --> 00:12:42,369
- I'm so sorry, honey.
- What is he talking about?
297
00:12:42,369 --> 00:12:43,501
I'm so sorry.
298
00:12:43,501 --> 00:12:45,242
[Allison] Nathan?
299
00:12:45,242 --> 00:12:46,852
Nathan, what's going on?
300
00:12:50,725 --> 00:12:51,988
They're gone.
301
00:12:54,164 --> 00:12:55,643
They're both gone.
302
00:12:56,166 --> 00:12:57,254
Who's gone?
303
00:12:57,254 --> 00:12:58,472
[Diane] Honey...
304
00:13:02,563 --> 00:13:04,914
[melancholy music playing]
305
00:13:14,097 --> 00:13:16,664
[sighs] No, Mom.
306
00:13:17,404 --> 00:13:18,928
[gasping]
307
00:13:18,928 --> 00:13:20,886
[voice breaking] Why, Mom?
308
00:13:20,886 --> 00:13:22,975
[Diane] I'm so sorry, honey.
309
00:13:31,070 --> 00:13:33,420
[melancholy music continues]
310
00:13:45,041 --> 00:13:47,304
["Wake Up With The Sun"
playing]
311
00:13:51,830 --> 00:13:54,615
♪ Wake up with
the sun in morning ♪
312
00:13:54,615 --> 00:13:57,531
♪ Go to sleep with
the moon at night... ♪
313
00:13:57,531 --> 00:13:59,011
[on speaker]
Hey, guys! Bella here.
314
00:13:59,011 --> 00:14:00,491
Welcome to my bathroom!
315
00:14:00,491 --> 00:14:03,450
Today, we're gonna learn
to cut our own hair.
316
00:14:03,450 --> 00:14:04,887
So let's jump in.
317
00:14:04,887 --> 00:14:08,238
To get started,
we grab this first front layer
318
00:14:08,978 --> 00:14:10,457
just like this.
319
00:14:10,457 --> 00:14:13,983
And put your scissors
at, like, a slight angle.
320
00:14:15,767 --> 00:14:18,770
Okay, it's now or never.
[chuckles]
321
00:14:18,770 --> 00:14:20,119
Go for it!
322
00:14:20,119 --> 00:14:22,034
♪ What their purpose
is on earth ♪
323
00:14:22,034 --> 00:14:24,819
♪ To love and be
loved in return... ♪
324
00:14:24,819 --> 00:14:25,908
Fuck.
325
00:14:25,908 --> 00:14:27,300
[Bella] You nailed it!
326
00:14:27,300 --> 00:14:29,781
You're officially a stylist
just like me!
327
00:14:29,781 --> 00:14:31,174
Now, go ahead
328
00:14:31,174 --> 00:14:33,872
and grab the same layer
on the other side.
329
00:14:33,872 --> 00:14:35,918
And just go for it!
330
00:14:35,918 --> 00:14:38,268
Okay. [sighs]
331
00:14:38,268 --> 00:14:41,097
♪ Happiness comes
from inside ♪
332
00:14:41,097 --> 00:14:43,490
♪ At the center
of your mind... ♪
333
00:14:43,490 --> 00:14:44,578
Fuck.
334
00:14:44,578 --> 00:14:45,928
[Bella] Does it look even?
335
00:14:46,319 --> 00:14:47,930
Uh...
336
00:14:47,930 --> 00:14:49,714
Not exactly. No.
337
00:14:49,714 --> 00:14:52,195
Good job.
You look amazing!
338
00:14:53,805 --> 00:14:55,198
Thank you.
339
00:14:55,198 --> 00:14:57,809
♪ You can change
the darkest day ♪
340
00:14:57,809 --> 00:15:00,725
♪ Simply by
the things you say... ♪
341
00:15:01,726 --> 00:15:03,336
Wow...
342
00:15:03,336 --> 00:15:06,383
♪ Oooh oooh ooh ♪
343
00:15:07,950 --> 00:15:09,647
I love it.
344
00:15:09,647 --> 00:15:11,127
[indistinct tv chatter]
345
00:15:12,867 --> 00:15:16,306
Oh, my God. Allie,
what the hell is all this?
346
00:15:16,306 --> 00:15:20,049
You have got to stop buying
all this crap.
347
00:15:21,702 --> 00:15:25,228
Yeah, well, one of them
is an acrylic nail set
348
00:15:25,228 --> 00:15:27,621
that I know you'll appreciate
more than I will.
349
00:15:27,621 --> 00:15:29,014
And the others
are ankle weights.
350
00:15:29,014 --> 00:15:31,016
Remember? We said we were
gonna get in shape?
351
00:15:31,930 --> 00:15:33,497
Oh, my God.
352
00:15:33,497 --> 00:15:36,543
Allie, what the hell
did you do to your hair?
353
00:15:36,543 --> 00:15:38,023
What? It's makeover Monday.
354
00:15:38,023 --> 00:15:41,026
- It's Friday.
- Oh.
355
00:15:41,026 --> 00:15:43,072
- It's so dark in here.
- No, please, don't open that.
356
00:15:43,072 --> 00:15:44,464
Mama, that is so bright!
357
00:15:44,464 --> 00:15:46,510
[Diane] Did you go
to physical therapy today?
358
00:15:46,510 --> 00:15:48,468
Um, well, I tried to,
359
00:15:48,468 --> 00:15:50,514
- but I overslept.
- Allie...
360
00:15:50,514 --> 00:15:52,907
What? I don't need PT.
I don't.
361
00:15:52,907 --> 00:15:54,300
Allie, your hair.
362
00:15:55,084 --> 00:15:56,650
You don't like it?
363
00:15:56,650 --> 00:15:58,783
I just don't understand why
you would cut your own hair.
364
00:15:58,783 --> 00:16:01,133
Well, the girl said
it was easy, and it was not.
365
00:16:01,133 --> 00:16:02,526
What girl?
366
00:16:02,526 --> 00:16:05,920
This girl on the Internet.
She's an influencer.
367
00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:07,748
She influenced me.
368
00:16:07,748 --> 00:16:12,101
Such a pigsty in here.
I am not happy about this.
369
00:16:12,101 --> 00:16:13,928
Hey, Mama, can you tell me
where my pills are?
370
00:16:13,928 --> 00:16:16,409
Which ones?
371
00:16:16,409 --> 00:16:20,065
We said we were going to
wean off of them. Remember?
372
00:16:20,065 --> 00:16:22,024
- Did we?
- Yes.
373
00:16:22,024 --> 00:16:24,765
Because "we" are in pain
374
00:16:24,765 --> 00:16:26,637
and "we" need more.
375
00:16:26,637 --> 00:16:27,986
They're not gonna
give you more, Allie.
376
00:16:27,986 --> 00:16:29,422
- They have to!
- No, they don't.
377
00:16:29,422 --> 00:16:30,945
I need them!
378
00:16:30,945 --> 00:16:32,556
Listen to me.
379
00:16:32,556 --> 00:16:34,688
You're not in physical pain anymore.
380
00:16:34,688 --> 00:16:36,821
Have you been doing
the tapping thing
381
00:16:36,821 --> 00:16:38,214
that that one shrink
taught you?
382
00:16:38,214 --> 00:16:40,433
Remember?
For anxiety and stress,
383
00:16:40,433 --> 00:16:42,261
and it calms you down
on the...
384
00:16:42,261 --> 00:16:43,958
- eyes, and then the lips.
- Mom!
385
00:16:43,958 --> 00:16:45,656
[Diane] Or play your piano.
That always cheers you up.
386
00:16:45,656 --> 00:16:47,005
I don't wanna talk
about this, please.
387
00:16:47,005 --> 00:16:49,834
I have the worst headache!
Can you just stop?
388
00:16:49,834 --> 00:16:52,750
Can you call the doctors
and help me, please?
389
00:16:52,750 --> 00:16:54,534
Which one? Patel?
He said no more.
390
00:16:54,534 --> 00:16:56,884
Okay, well, fuck Patel.
Fuck Patel!
391
00:16:56,884 --> 00:16:58,669
How about Goldberg, or...
392
00:16:58,669 --> 00:17:00,540
or Fong?
393
00:17:00,540 --> 00:17:02,151
- Allie...
- Please, Mom.
394
00:17:02,151 --> 00:17:03,326
- Just call 'em. Just help me.
- You're being a little...
395
00:17:03,326 --> 00:17:04,718
- No.
- Just help me, please.
396
00:17:04,718 --> 00:17:06,329
Guess what?
They all said "no."
397
00:17:06,329 --> 00:17:08,374
Patel. Goldberg.
Fong. Rosenberg.
398
00:17:08,374 --> 00:17:10,289
Okay, well, I'll try Vromen.
He loves me.
399
00:17:10,289 --> 00:17:12,204
Vromen is an orthodontist.
400
00:17:12,204 --> 00:17:13,684
Yeah, but he used to
flirt with me
401
00:17:13,684 --> 00:17:15,773
when his fingers were really
deep inside my mouth,
402
00:17:15,773 --> 00:17:18,297
and it was very inappropriate,
and so, he really owes me one.
403
00:17:18,297 --> 00:17:20,169
Allie, I don't like
how you're acting.
404
00:17:20,169 --> 00:17:21,387
You know what?
Enough is enough.
405
00:17:21,387 --> 00:17:23,172
You gotta get out
of this living room,
406
00:17:23,172 --> 00:17:24,782
take off your pajamas,
407
00:17:24,782 --> 00:17:26,697
and get your ass,
and go get a job.
408
00:17:26,697 --> 00:17:27,828
I'm sick of this crap.
409
00:17:27,828 --> 00:17:30,135
As if you have any right
410
00:17:30,135 --> 00:17:32,224
lecturing me
on medicating myself.
411
00:17:32,224 --> 00:17:33,617
What is that supposed to mean?
412
00:17:33,617 --> 00:17:36,794
It means, Mom, you're such
a fucking hypocrite!
413
00:17:36,794 --> 00:17:39,623
You don't think that I clock
how many Xanax you take?
414
00:17:39,623 --> 00:17:41,799
Or how many glasses of wine
you drink?
415
00:17:41,799 --> 00:17:43,801
You think I'm just a zombie
that doesn't notice anything,
416
00:17:43,801 --> 00:17:46,499
but I notice
fucking everything! I see you.
417
00:17:46,499 --> 00:17:50,112
So, can I have my pills, please?
418
00:17:50,112 --> 00:17:52,331
You're not listening.
There's no more.
419
00:17:52,331 --> 00:17:53,854
[breathes heavily]
420
00:17:59,556 --> 00:18:01,471
[Diane] You get
right back here,
421
00:18:01,471 --> 00:18:03,081
- you little brat!
- No!
422
00:18:03,081 --> 00:18:05,518
What in the hell do you think
you are doing?
423
00:18:05,518 --> 00:18:06,780
Get out of there!
424
00:18:06,780 --> 00:18:07,955
- Get out of there!
- [Allison] Get off me!
425
00:18:07,955 --> 00:18:09,435
- No! Get out of there!
- Let go!
426
00:18:09,435 --> 00:18:11,698
- [Diane] What are you doing?
- No! Are they in here?
427
00:18:11,698 --> 00:18:14,484
- [Diane] Get back! Cut it out!
- You are hurting me!
428
00:18:14,484 --> 00:18:15,833
[Diane] Stop it!
429
00:18:15,833 --> 00:18:17,617
- Stop it! Put that back!
- [grunts] Mom!
430
00:18:18,705 --> 00:18:19,750
No.
431
00:18:19,750 --> 00:18:21,186
- Open the door.
- No.
432
00:18:21,186 --> 00:18:22,796
- Open the fucking door!
- Stop it! Stop it.
433
00:18:22,796 --> 00:18:24,146
- Mom, let me out.
- No.
434
00:18:24,146 --> 00:18:26,322
Let me out. Let me out!
435
00:18:26,322 --> 00:18:27,584
Mama!
436
00:18:27,584 --> 00:18:29,368
- No! Stop it!
- Give me those... Ow.
437
00:18:29,368 --> 00:18:31,544
- Stop it!
- [Diane] Ow! Ow, ow, ow, ow.
438
00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:33,677
- You fucking crazy little brat.
- [Allison] No!
439
00:18:34,591 --> 00:18:35,809
[groans]
440
00:18:36,288 --> 00:18:38,247
Shit!
441
00:18:38,247 --> 00:18:40,553
No, no, no, no, no, no.
442
00:18:40,553 --> 00:18:42,555
Mama, no! Please. No!
443
00:18:44,731 --> 00:18:46,777
Why the fuck did you do that?
444
00:18:46,777 --> 00:18:47,952
I'm in pain!
445
00:18:47,952 --> 00:18:49,083
I don't give a shit!
446
00:18:49,083 --> 00:18:50,563
Your daughter
is in actual pain!
447
00:18:50,563 --> 00:18:51,999
I don't give a shit!
448
00:18:51,999 --> 00:18:55,568
I fucking hate you so much!
449
00:18:55,568 --> 00:18:57,222
[Diane] You're bleeding!
450
00:18:57,222 --> 00:18:59,398
[panting]
451
00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:02,749
You get back here right now.
452
00:19:02,749 --> 00:19:04,186
- ALLISON: Leave me alone.
- You come back here.
453
00:19:04,186 --> 00:19:05,274
- ALLISON: Leave me alone.
- I'm gonna grab your...
454
00:19:05,274 --> 00:19:06,579
[arguing continues]
455
00:19:06,579 --> 00:19:07,928
[Allison]
Leave me the fuck alone!
456
00:19:07,928 --> 00:19:09,103
[Diane] I'm not gonna leave you
the fuck alone,
457
00:19:09,103 --> 00:19:10,279
- you little brat.
- Ugh!
458
00:19:12,019 --> 00:19:14,065
[mellow music playing]
459
00:19:15,980 --> 00:19:17,329
Allison!
460
00:19:17,329 --> 00:19:19,462
- Leave me alone!
- [Diane] Where are you going?
461
00:19:19,462 --> 00:19:21,333
Leave me alone!
462
00:19:23,248 --> 00:19:25,424
[panting]
463
00:19:30,734 --> 00:19:32,562
[crowd applauding and cheering]
464
00:19:32,562 --> 00:19:34,346
[Daniel] Let's go, Ryan!
465
00:19:35,652 --> 00:19:37,480
Attagirl! Attagirl!
466
00:19:41,701 --> 00:19:42,833
[crowd groans]
467
00:19:44,138 --> 00:19:46,140
Fuck! [sighs]
468
00:19:46,140 --> 00:19:47,881
So you're the Ryan
that's been talking to Damien?
469
00:19:47,881 --> 00:19:49,143
Get the fuck outta my face.
470
00:19:49,143 --> 00:19:50,362
See, you talk to people
like that, bitch,
471
00:19:50,362 --> 00:19:51,885
that's why you have
no fucking friends.
472
00:19:51,885 --> 00:19:53,060
Why are you
hitting on me, huh?
473
00:19:53,060 --> 00:19:54,540
Uh, I'm not the one
named "Ryan."
474
00:19:54,540 --> 00:19:56,281
It's a fucking dyke's name.
You a dyke?
475
00:19:56,281 --> 00:19:59,197
- Only when I fuck your mother.
- Oh, at least I have a mother.
476
00:20:02,635 --> 00:20:04,202
What the fuck
did you just say to me?
477
00:20:04,942 --> 00:20:06,204
Hey!
478
00:20:06,204 --> 00:20:09,468
Stay away from Damien,
you fucking whore.
479
00:20:10,426 --> 00:20:11,470
Hey!
480
00:20:11,470 --> 00:20:13,429
Break that up, Ref!
481
00:20:13,429 --> 00:20:14,821
- [Ryan grunts]
- [whistle blowing]
482
00:20:14,821 --> 00:20:15,909
[referee] Break it up.
Break it up!
483
00:20:16,214 --> 00:20:17,259
Hey!
484
00:20:18,172 --> 00:20:19,870
[whistle continues blowing]
485
00:20:19,870 --> 00:20:22,916
[referee] Hey! That's it!
You're both out. Red card.
486
00:20:22,916 --> 00:20:24,309
[Daniel] Ryan,
what the hell was that?
487
00:20:24,309 --> 00:20:25,789
[huffs] I quit.
488
00:20:25,789 --> 00:20:28,095
[tearfully] I quit.
I hate this fucking game.
489
00:20:28,095 --> 00:20:30,141
Why? Because you got
in a fight?
490
00:20:30,141 --> 00:20:32,186
Come on, that's not you.
491
00:20:32,186 --> 00:20:34,319
You're tough.
You're not a quitter.
492
00:20:34,319 --> 00:20:37,366
- She made fun of Mom.
- What?
493
00:20:37,366 --> 00:20:39,542
She said,
"At least I have a mom."
494
00:20:42,327 --> 00:20:43,894
Well, fuck her.
495
00:20:47,593 --> 00:20:48,681
Well...
496
00:20:50,030 --> 00:20:52,468
And what kind of a punch
was that?
497
00:20:52,468 --> 00:20:54,731
You throw this hard right hook
498
00:20:54,731 --> 00:20:57,386
and then you leave yourself
wide open for the jab.
499
00:20:58,474 --> 00:21:00,171
We're gonna have to work
on that.
500
00:21:01,781 --> 00:21:03,783
[mellow music playing]
501
00:21:11,182 --> 00:21:13,184
[breathing heavily]
502
00:21:17,884 --> 00:21:19,059
Hi.
503
00:21:19,059 --> 00:21:21,627
I'm here to get
a prescription refilled.
504
00:21:21,627 --> 00:21:24,456
Last name, Johnson.
Birthday, August 24th.
505
00:21:24,456 --> 00:21:26,415
Okay. For which medication?
506
00:21:26,415 --> 00:21:29,548
Uh... The Oxy. OxyContin.
507
00:21:29,548 --> 00:21:31,724
It says here
you are out of refills.
508
00:21:31,724 --> 00:21:34,336
I see you've been on them
for over a year now.
509
00:21:34,336 --> 00:21:36,425
Your doctor's probably trying
to wean you off of them.
510
00:21:36,425 --> 00:21:38,818
As I'm sure you know,
they can be very addictive.
511
00:21:38,818 --> 00:21:40,690
Oh, really?
I hadn't fucking heard that.
512
00:21:42,561 --> 00:21:43,693
Sorry.
513
00:21:43,693 --> 00:21:45,434
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
514
00:21:46,173 --> 00:21:48,350
Listen...
515
00:21:48,350 --> 00:21:50,264
I was in a really bad
car accident,
516
00:21:50,264 --> 00:21:53,355
and I need them,
because I'm in a lot of pain.
517
00:21:53,355 --> 00:21:54,399
Just now?
518
00:21:55,618 --> 00:21:56,749
What? No.
519
00:21:56,749 --> 00:21:59,317
Your elbow is bleeding.
520
00:21:59,317 --> 00:22:01,101
Oh, shit.
Look, it's fine.
521
00:22:01,101 --> 00:22:02,625
Let me go get you a bandage.
522
00:22:02,625 --> 00:22:04,496
I don't need
a fucking bandage. It's fine.
523
00:22:08,761 --> 00:22:09,849
Then take this.
524
00:22:12,678 --> 00:22:14,854
Oh, my goodness.
Thank you so much. Thank you.
525
00:22:17,161 --> 00:22:19,816
I feel so much better now.
Thank you.
526
00:22:20,338 --> 00:22:21,687
Fucking bitch.
527
00:22:27,258 --> 00:22:29,260
[hip-hop song playing]
528
00:22:33,046 --> 00:22:34,918
[instructor on speaker] Burn,
but guess what that burn is?
529
00:22:34,918 --> 00:22:38,008
That burn is in your soul.
It is lifting you up.
530
00:22:38,008 --> 00:22:39,444
You are climbing that mountain
531
00:22:39,444 --> 00:22:41,359
and you are reaching
higher heights
532
00:22:41,359 --> 00:22:43,013
than you ever have before.
533
00:22:43,013 --> 00:22:44,362
Keep pedaling.
534
00:22:49,236 --> 00:22:51,587
[breathing heavily]
535
00:23:00,683 --> 00:23:02,946
[unnerving music playing]
536
00:23:13,826 --> 00:23:15,828
[inhales sharply]
537
00:23:21,530 --> 00:23:22,574
[sniffles]
538
00:23:30,364 --> 00:23:31,757
[gurgles]
539
00:23:32,497 --> 00:23:33,846
[swallows]
540
00:23:34,543 --> 00:23:35,979
[exhales sharply]
541
00:23:37,241 --> 00:23:38,808
[whimpers]
542
00:23:42,899 --> 00:23:44,683
[panting]
543
00:23:48,905 --> 00:23:52,082
[back-up alarm beeping]
544
00:23:52,082 --> 00:23:54,214
[horn blaring]
545
00:23:57,261 --> 00:23:59,306
[gasping]
546
00:24:01,395 --> 00:24:03,397
[panting]
547
00:24:12,319 --> 00:24:14,452
[mellow music playing]
548
00:24:20,240 --> 00:24:22,460
- [gasps] Hi.
- Hi!
549
00:24:22,460 --> 00:24:24,288
- Hey!
- Hi!
550
00:24:25,419 --> 00:24:26,551
- [giggles]
- [Allison] Hi.
551
00:24:26,551 --> 00:24:29,162
Oh, my God. I love your hair!
552
00:24:29,162 --> 00:24:32,818
- It is so chic. Who did it?
- Ah, thank you! Um...
553
00:24:32,818 --> 00:24:35,429
I, uh, got a new gal.
554
00:24:35,429 --> 00:24:37,997
Well, I gotta get her number.
[laughs]
555
00:24:37,997 --> 00:24:39,433
Okay.
556
00:24:39,433 --> 00:24:42,393
Oh, I was so happy
that you reached out.
557
00:24:42,393 --> 00:24:45,352
Because you weren't responding
to any of my texts.
558
00:24:45,352 --> 00:24:47,224
Of course, I wanted
to give you your space,
559
00:24:47,224 --> 00:24:48,921
but I was worried.
560
00:24:48,921 --> 00:24:50,401
- [waiter] Hi, good morning.
- Hey!
561
00:24:50,401 --> 00:24:51,707
Can I get you anything?
562
00:24:51,707 --> 00:24:54,579
Uh, yeah. Can I please get
a Jack and Coke?
563
00:24:55,101 --> 00:24:57,103
Uh...
564
00:24:57,103 --> 00:24:59,541
Sorry, our bar doesn't
actually open until 11:00.
565
00:24:59,541 --> 00:25:00,890
Oh.
566
00:25:00,890 --> 00:25:04,371
Uh, okay. In that case,
I'll get a black coffee.
567
00:25:04,371 --> 00:25:06,156
- Oat milk latte.
- You got it.
568
00:25:09,463 --> 00:25:11,857
So, how's, how's work?
569
00:25:11,857 --> 00:25:13,032
You're still at Purdue, right?
570
00:25:13,032 --> 00:25:14,599
- Still repping Purdue.
- Yeah.
571
00:25:14,599 --> 00:25:15,992
You'd think it would've been
a shit show
572
00:25:15,992 --> 00:25:17,820
because of the bankruptcy
and all the lawsuits.
573
00:25:17,820 --> 00:25:19,691
- Mm.
- But, between you and me,
574
00:25:19,691 --> 00:25:21,563
my numbers
have actually increased.
575
00:25:21,563 --> 00:25:22,825
Wow.
576
00:25:22,825 --> 00:25:26,176
My bonus last quarter
was insane.
577
00:25:26,176 --> 00:25:28,352
- It sells itself. [chuckles]
- Yeah.
578
00:25:28,352 --> 00:25:29,571
Karl Marx was wrong.
579
00:25:29,571 --> 00:25:31,703
Turns out
the opiate of the masses
580
00:25:31,703 --> 00:25:32,791
is opium.
581
00:25:32,791 --> 00:25:34,576
[both chuckle]
582
00:25:37,535 --> 00:25:38,710
Anyway.
583
00:25:38,710 --> 00:25:39,972
How are you doing?
584
00:25:39,972 --> 00:25:41,495
When are you going back
to work?
585
00:25:41,495 --> 00:25:42,845
[smacks lips] Listen,
I'm just gonna cut right to it
586
00:25:42,845 --> 00:25:43,933
because you're my friend
587
00:25:43,933 --> 00:25:45,935
and I know
you're gonna understand.
588
00:25:45,935 --> 00:25:47,110
Um...
589
00:25:48,241 --> 00:25:50,853
I'm still in a lot of pain.
590
00:25:50,853 --> 00:25:52,376
Oh, Allie...
591
00:25:52,376 --> 00:25:56,510
I know, and my docs
are cutting my Oxy scripts
592
00:25:56,510 --> 00:25:58,774
because everyone's
really freaked out
593
00:25:58,774 --> 00:26:00,253
about addiction these days.
594
00:26:00,253 --> 00:26:02,081
Uh... [hesitates]
595
00:26:02,081 --> 00:26:04,780
So, I was wondering
if it would be possible...
596
00:26:04,780 --> 00:26:06,651
Allie, please tell me
you didn't invite me
597
00:26:06,651 --> 00:26:08,914
to breakfast
to hit me up for pills.
598
00:26:09,306 --> 00:26:10,437
No.
599
00:26:10,437 --> 00:26:12,439
- No, no, no, no, no.
- [sighs]
600
00:26:12,439 --> 00:26:14,659
It's just until I can get in,
and see my docs.
601
00:26:14,659 --> 00:26:16,835
Um, because my fucking mother,
602
00:26:16,835 --> 00:26:19,621
she threw my last refill
into the toilet, so...
603
00:26:20,012 --> 00:26:21,666
No way.
604
00:26:21,666 --> 00:26:23,363
Are you fucking
with me right now?
605
00:26:23,363 --> 00:26:24,843
No.
606
00:26:24,843 --> 00:26:26,845
If you have a problem,
you need to get some help.
607
00:26:26,845 --> 00:26:29,282
I can help you
find the right rehab.
608
00:26:29,282 --> 00:26:31,328
Please don't hand me
a pamphlet.
609
00:26:31,328 --> 00:26:32,851
I already have one.
610
00:26:32,851 --> 00:26:35,158
Well, then find them
on the street if you have to.
611
00:26:35,158 --> 00:26:37,203
Every dive bar
in this town's got a guy
612
00:26:37,203 --> 00:26:39,379
with a pharmacy
in his front pocket.
613
00:26:39,379 --> 00:26:41,251
You know, Becka,
614
00:26:42,513 --> 00:26:44,602
I really didn't want
to do this.
615
00:26:46,386 --> 00:26:47,474
But...
616
00:26:49,433 --> 00:26:50,869
there's a handful of things
617
00:26:50,869 --> 00:26:54,133
that happened
at your bachelorette party
618
00:26:54,133 --> 00:26:57,702
that I'm pretty sure
you want to be kept private.
619
00:26:57,702 --> 00:27:01,358
Allison, are you trying
to blackmail me for OxyContin?
620
00:27:01,358 --> 00:27:03,186
I'm just asking you for help.
621
00:27:04,317 --> 00:27:06,537
Like, as a friend.
622
00:27:08,365 --> 00:27:10,541
But you did blow that dancer.
[chuckles]
623
00:27:11,498 --> 00:27:12,761
It happened for a second.
624
00:27:12,761 --> 00:27:15,894
I know, I know.
But you did it, and I saw.
625
00:27:16,895 --> 00:27:17,983
It never went in my mouth.
626
00:27:17,983 --> 00:27:21,552
It was in your mouth.
627
00:27:21,552 --> 00:27:22,814
Past the tip.
628
00:27:23,772 --> 00:27:26,296
Past the fucking tip.
629
00:27:27,340 --> 00:27:28,690
Allie, you need help.
630
00:27:29,865 --> 00:27:31,518
Destroy my life
if you have to.
631
00:27:31,518 --> 00:27:35,131
But for the love of God,
get some fucking help!
632
00:27:35,131 --> 00:27:36,610
Okay, bye.
Fuck you.
633
00:27:36,610 --> 00:27:38,047
Fuck you!
634
00:27:42,921 --> 00:27:43,966
[grunts]
635
00:27:43,966 --> 00:27:46,272
Uh... I don't...
Oh, fuck.
636
00:27:46,272 --> 00:27:48,666
[sighs]
637
00:27:48,666 --> 00:27:50,363
I don't have any money.
I'm really sorry.
638
00:27:50,363 --> 00:27:51,713
I can't pay for those.
639
00:27:51,713 --> 00:27:54,193
That's okay. Take it.
640
00:27:54,193 --> 00:27:56,108
I mixed in a little tequila
for you.
641
00:28:00,765 --> 00:28:01,984
[slurps]
642
00:28:04,726 --> 00:28:06,075
That's disgusting.
643
00:28:07,598 --> 00:28:08,599
Thank you.
644
00:28:11,689 --> 00:28:14,474
[woman] Mr. Adams,
we really wanna do
645
00:28:14,474 --> 00:28:16,650
everything we can
to help Ryan.
646
00:28:18,914 --> 00:28:20,524
But she needs to take
some responsibility
647
00:28:20,524 --> 00:28:22,526
for her behavior.
648
00:28:22,526 --> 00:28:25,616
That girl does not listen
to a thing I say.
649
00:28:27,270 --> 00:28:28,750
To be honest,
650
00:28:28,750 --> 00:28:30,490
I was hoping
you were calling me in here
651
00:28:30,490 --> 00:28:32,188
to give me some advice.
652
00:28:33,929 --> 00:28:35,757
I need help.
653
00:28:35,757 --> 00:28:37,759
[man] It's just that
we're a public school.
654
00:28:37,759 --> 00:28:40,674
We have 2,000 kids
to look after.
655
00:28:40,674 --> 00:28:42,241
We don't have the bandwidth
656
00:28:42,241 --> 00:28:44,896
to micromanage her in ways
that she deserves and needs.
657
00:28:44,896 --> 00:28:46,637
So, what are you saying?
658
00:28:47,638 --> 00:28:49,335
I will give her
an extra strike
659
00:28:49,335 --> 00:28:51,773
because of the circumstances.
660
00:28:51,773 --> 00:28:53,426
But if she doesn't tone down
her language
661
00:28:53,426 --> 00:28:55,080
with her teachers
662
00:28:55,080 --> 00:28:56,952
and gets into one more fight,
663
00:28:57,909 --> 00:28:59,258
we'll have to expel her.
664
00:29:18,538 --> 00:29:19,713
[chair scraps]
665
00:29:20,932 --> 00:29:23,805
Hi, can I get
a double tequila, please?
666
00:29:31,769 --> 00:29:32,770
Allison.
667
00:29:33,727 --> 00:29:35,817
Yo, I know you.
668
00:29:36,948 --> 00:29:37,949
It's Mark.
669
00:29:38,907 --> 00:29:40,082
Yeah, hey.
670
00:29:40,082 --> 00:29:41,953
Yeah.
671
00:29:41,953 --> 00:29:44,608
I haven't seen you
since high school.
672
00:29:44,608 --> 00:29:47,045
This is Diego.
You remember Diego?
673
00:29:47,045 --> 00:29:48,220
- Hey.
- [Diego] Hey.
674
00:29:49,265 --> 00:29:51,049
You just having
a little breakfast?
675
00:29:51,049 --> 00:29:53,835
Uh... Um... I just...
676
00:29:55,445 --> 00:29:57,360
I just needed
to get out of the house.
677
00:29:57,360 --> 00:29:59,449
[chuckles] Yeah, I feel that.
678
00:29:59,449 --> 00:30:01,886
I heard what happened to you.
The accident.
679
00:30:01,886 --> 00:30:03,061
Saw it in the Star Ledger. Sorry.
680
00:30:03,061 --> 00:30:04,497
What happened?
681
00:30:04,497 --> 00:30:05,716
[Diego] She was in that
accident on the turnpike.
682
00:30:05,716 --> 00:30:07,283
Two people died.
683
00:30:07,283 --> 00:30:08,850
Holy shit.
684
00:30:09,894 --> 00:30:11,287
That was you.
685
00:30:12,244 --> 00:30:14,246
Oh, bro.
686
00:30:14,246 --> 00:30:16,205
That would've fucked me up.
687
00:30:16,205 --> 00:30:17,423
It wasn't my fault.
688
00:30:17,423 --> 00:30:20,035
Yeah, I'm sure.
But, like, still...
689
00:30:25,910 --> 00:30:26,868
[Mark] Damn.
690
00:30:30,306 --> 00:30:33,309
[exhales sharply] Hey, can I
have another one, please?
691
00:30:34,614 --> 00:30:35,789
You having a tough day?
692
00:30:37,008 --> 00:30:38,357
Just a day.
693
00:30:39,793 --> 00:30:42,057
I just wanna get as far away
from here as possible.
694
00:30:42,057 --> 00:30:43,406
Yo, there's this app,
695
00:30:43,406 --> 00:30:44,798
it tells you
the exact opposite
696
00:30:44,798 --> 00:30:46,713
of where you are
on the globe is.
697
00:30:46,713 --> 00:30:48,802
That's where you should go.
I'll look it up for you.
698
00:30:48,802 --> 00:30:51,370
[Mark] Yo, that's how I feel
every fuckin' day of my life.
699
00:30:51,370 --> 00:30:53,807
I can't seem to escape
this town.
700
00:30:53,807 --> 00:30:55,461
It's like there's
a force field around it
701
00:30:55,461 --> 00:30:57,115
or something.
702
00:30:57,115 --> 00:30:59,813
Like, some people know
how to get outta here.
703
00:30:59,813 --> 00:31:01,337
But the rest of us,
704
00:31:01,337 --> 00:31:03,078
we just keep banging our heads
up against the glass.
705
00:31:03,078 --> 00:31:05,254
It's Perth. That's the city
706
00:31:05,254 --> 00:31:07,125
on the other side of the globe
from here.
707
00:31:07,125 --> 00:31:08,997
You should go to Perth.
708
00:31:08,997 --> 00:31:11,564
I don't have enough money
to get to Perth,
709
00:31:11,564 --> 00:31:13,044
but thank you.
710
00:31:13,044 --> 00:31:15,003
Aren't you engaged
to Nathan Adams?
711
00:31:16,221 --> 00:31:18,180
I was, yeah.
712
00:31:18,180 --> 00:31:20,747
He was an amazing running back
in high school.
713
00:31:20,747 --> 00:31:21,923
He used to run
every fucking play.
714
00:31:21,923 --> 00:31:23,054
- You remember him, Mark?
- [Mark] Yeah.
715
00:31:23,054 --> 00:31:24,186
[Diego] Every fucking play,
716
00:31:24,186 --> 00:31:25,796
they'd come
on the PA system like,
717
00:31:25,796 --> 00:31:29,408
"Nathan Adams,
the ball carrier."
718
00:31:29,408 --> 00:31:31,367
He was the whole fucking team.
You remember him, Mark?
719
00:31:31,367 --> 00:31:33,238
Yeah, I remember him.
720
00:31:33,238 --> 00:31:34,805
Isn't he deaf?
721
00:31:34,805 --> 00:31:38,200
Uh... In one ear. Since birth.
722
00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:39,505
Wow, that's impressive
723
00:31:39,505 --> 00:31:41,116
that he could be, like,
that good, you know?
724
00:31:41,116 --> 00:31:42,769
And half deaf.
725
00:31:42,769 --> 00:31:44,075
So you're, like, single?
726
00:31:44,075 --> 00:31:47,122
[Mark chuckles] Yo.
Shut the fuck up, Diego.
727
00:31:47,122 --> 00:31:49,559
What? You think
she's gonna date you?
728
00:31:49,559 --> 00:31:51,256
Where are you gonna take her?
You live with your mom.
729
00:31:51,256 --> 00:31:54,085
[chuckles] God damn.
730
00:31:54,085 --> 00:31:55,304
Allison, I'm sorry.
731
00:31:55,304 --> 00:31:58,394
My fucking friend
has no tact at all.
732
00:31:58,394 --> 00:32:01,136
[chuckles]
We're not used to having
733
00:32:01,136 --> 00:32:03,790
pretty girls such as yourself
come in here.
734
00:32:03,790 --> 00:32:05,531
So, you gotta excuse his
735
00:32:05,531 --> 00:32:07,272
lack of decor.
736
00:32:09,535 --> 00:32:10,754
Decorum.
737
00:32:11,581 --> 00:32:12,669
What?
738
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:16,064
"Decor" is
739
00:32:16,064 --> 00:32:20,155
the Bud Light lamp
above my head.
740
00:32:21,243 --> 00:32:23,897
"Decorum" is his behavior.
741
00:32:25,508 --> 00:32:27,814
Neither is currently ideal.
742
00:32:29,120 --> 00:32:31,209
[men cheering]
743
00:32:32,515 --> 00:32:34,343
Hey, can I ask you
something, like,
744
00:32:35,431 --> 00:32:37,128
between us old friends?
745
00:32:37,128 --> 00:32:39,391
You weren't our friend.
You were popular.
746
00:32:39,391 --> 00:32:41,567
- You were a bitch, actually.
- All right. Diego.
747
00:32:43,308 --> 00:32:46,094
That's old shit.
Right, Allison?
748
00:32:46,094 --> 00:32:48,574
We're past that.
We're grown-ups.
749
00:32:48,574 --> 00:32:51,490
Those of us stuck behind
this force field,
750
00:32:51,490 --> 00:32:54,450
- we gotta stick together.
- [Allison] Yeah.
751
00:32:54,450 --> 00:32:58,671
Um, do you know
where I could get some Oxy?
752
00:32:58,671 --> 00:33:00,195
[chuckling] God damn, girl.
753
00:33:00,195 --> 00:33:02,371
No foreplay. No nothing.
754
00:33:02,371 --> 00:33:05,591
No "How are you?
How's your family?"
755
00:33:05,591 --> 00:33:07,028
No, we don't fuck with pills.
756
00:33:07,811 --> 00:33:09,204
I remember in high school
757
00:33:09,204 --> 00:33:11,119
you were the guys
that could, like,
758
00:33:12,033 --> 00:33:13,251
get anything.
759
00:33:13,251 --> 00:33:15,210
And now you're just
buttering us up.
760
00:33:16,820 --> 00:33:18,909
I don't have any money.
761
00:33:18,909 --> 00:33:21,346
How are you gonna pay
for that tequila?
762
00:33:21,346 --> 00:33:24,045
I hadn't got that far yet.
[sighs]
763
00:33:24,045 --> 00:33:25,959
- Is that Rolex real?
- Wait a second.
764
00:33:26,656 --> 00:33:28,658
Wait. Allie Johnson.
765
00:33:28,658 --> 00:33:31,617
Miss lovely Allie Johnson.
[grunts]
766
00:33:32,749 --> 00:33:34,881
You just stroll in here.
767
00:33:34,881 --> 00:33:36,796
[chuckling] You got no money.
768
00:33:36,796 --> 00:33:39,277
And you expect us
to get you Oxy?
769
00:33:39,277 --> 00:33:41,975
For free, and then you want us
to pay for your drink.
770
00:33:43,499 --> 00:33:44,978
Why the fuck would we do that?
771
00:33:46,458 --> 00:33:47,894
Nostalgia?
772
00:33:48,939 --> 00:33:50,375
Old friends?
773
00:33:50,375 --> 00:33:51,985
You thought you were
such hot shit in high school.
774
00:33:51,985 --> 00:33:53,161
You're no
fucking different now.
775
00:33:53,161 --> 00:33:54,640
All right. Shut up.
776
00:33:55,032 --> 00:33:56,468
Sorry.
777
00:33:56,468 --> 00:33:59,819
This guy. No decorum.
778
00:33:59,819 --> 00:34:00,994
No, he's right.
779
00:34:02,387 --> 00:34:04,955
I didn't think I was better
than you. I knew it.
780
00:34:05,999 --> 00:34:07,653
I looked down
on guys like you.
781
00:34:09,133 --> 00:34:12,049
I thought
you were Jersey trash
782
00:34:12,049 --> 00:34:14,660
that would never be able
to make it out of town.
783
00:34:15,574 --> 00:34:17,098
[snorts, laughs]
784
00:34:18,011 --> 00:34:19,535
Fucking bitch.
785
00:34:19,535 --> 00:34:21,363
But now you're sitting here
786
00:34:22,103 --> 00:34:23,756
right beside us
787
00:34:23,756 --> 00:34:26,411
and you're looking for a fix.
788
00:34:26,411 --> 00:34:27,978
A favor.
789
00:34:27,978 --> 00:34:30,198
The favor is a fix.
790
00:34:31,764 --> 00:34:34,027
- You're a fucking junkie now.
- No, I'm not.
791
00:34:34,027 --> 00:34:36,117
- You're a fucking junkie.
- No.
792
00:34:36,117 --> 00:34:37,205
- [Mark] Yeah, you are.
- Yeah, you are.
793
00:34:37,205 --> 00:34:38,597
Come on.
You're a fuckin' junkie.
794
00:34:38,597 --> 00:34:39,903
No. I'm not like you.
795
00:34:39,903 --> 00:34:41,339
Allie Johnson,
796
00:34:41,339 --> 00:34:43,733
you're so much more
like who you think we are
797
00:34:43,733 --> 00:34:45,256
than we actually are.
798
00:34:47,128 --> 00:34:49,521
Come on.
Say it, say it, say it.
799
00:34:49,521 --> 00:34:51,306
"I'm a fucking junkie."
You might like it.
800
00:34:51,306 --> 00:34:53,134
Fuck you. It's a pill.
801
00:34:53,134 --> 00:34:56,267
It's heroin
in a pretty little dress.
802
00:34:56,267 --> 00:34:57,964
I thought you were
the nice one.
803
00:34:59,314 --> 00:35:01,925
Why don't you say it?
Say... Say,
804
00:35:02,795 --> 00:35:05,189
"I'm a fucking junkie,"
805
00:35:05,189 --> 00:35:07,757
and then I'll get you whatever
you want. Anything.
806
00:35:09,280 --> 00:35:12,544
Say it. Just, like,
just come out with it.
807
00:35:12,544 --> 00:35:13,719
I'm currently reliant...
808
00:35:13,719 --> 00:35:17,245
No, that's not
what I fucking said.
809
00:35:17,245 --> 00:35:20,117
You sneaky little bitch.
That's not what I fucking said.
810
00:35:20,117 --> 00:35:21,379
- Is that what I said?
- No.
811
00:35:21,379 --> 00:35:23,207
That is not what I said.
812
00:35:25,078 --> 00:35:27,559
Say you're a fuckin' junkie.
Look at me.
813
00:35:27,559 --> 00:35:28,734
Look at me!
814
00:35:29,735 --> 00:35:32,564
Look me in the eyes, and say,
815
00:35:32,564 --> 00:35:35,785
"I'm a fucking junkie."
816
00:35:35,785 --> 00:35:37,178
Say it!
817
00:35:41,269 --> 00:35:42,966
I'm a fucking junkie.
818
00:35:47,144 --> 00:35:48,189
Good girl.
819
00:35:50,713 --> 00:35:52,149
Beth, I got these tequilas.
820
00:35:53,455 --> 00:35:55,761
I'm sorry
for raising my voice.
821
00:35:55,761 --> 00:35:56,936
We're just catching up.
822
00:35:57,546 --> 00:35:59,200
Allie, this is Beth.
823
00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:01,245
She's divine. She's the best.
824
00:36:01,245 --> 00:36:03,465
[soft music playing]
825
00:36:08,644 --> 00:36:09,993
That's not Oxy.
826
00:36:10,733 --> 00:36:11,951
Same shit.
827
00:36:24,964 --> 00:36:27,010
[coughs hoarsely]
828
00:36:27,880 --> 00:36:28,881
[inhales sharply]
829
00:36:31,188 --> 00:36:32,320
[exhales]
830
00:36:32,320 --> 00:36:34,365
[breathing heavily]
831
00:36:37,368 --> 00:36:38,891
[vomits]
832
00:36:38,891 --> 00:36:40,371
[groaning]
833
00:36:51,208 --> 00:36:52,383
Thank you.
Ooh, she just walked in.
834
00:36:53,689 --> 00:36:55,168
Oh, my God.
I was so worried about you.
835
00:36:55,168 --> 00:36:56,257
Where were you?
836
00:36:56,257 --> 00:36:59,260
- I'm so sorry.
- Oh, babe, oh.
837
00:36:59,260 --> 00:37:01,174
- I'm sorry.
- Uh-huh. No...
838
00:37:01,174 --> 00:37:02,872
I need help.
839
00:37:02,872 --> 00:37:04,221
I know. I never should have
840
00:37:04,221 --> 00:37:05,701
flushed those pills
down the toilet.
841
00:37:05,701 --> 00:37:08,225
I had no right. I'm so sorry.
I was just so worried.
842
00:37:08,225 --> 00:37:09,444
Can you help me, please, Mama?
843
00:37:09,444 --> 00:37:11,228
Yes, yes, I already did.
844
00:37:11,228 --> 00:37:13,274
Here, I got these from Linda.
845
00:37:13,274 --> 00:37:14,884
She's the woman
who works next to me
846
00:37:14,884 --> 00:37:16,538
in the toy kiosk at the mall.
847
00:37:16,538 --> 00:37:18,017
Her doctor gave them to her
848
00:37:18,017 --> 00:37:19,802
after she got punched
in the face by a shoplifter,
849
00:37:19,802 --> 00:37:21,020
but she said
she didn't need them.
850
00:37:21,020 --> 00:37:22,326
She swore by the neck brace.
851
00:37:22,326 --> 00:37:24,110
But you need 'em, honey.
So here.
852
00:37:24,110 --> 00:37:26,765
That right there is a gift
from Linda, okay?
853
00:37:26,765 --> 00:37:28,332
And we can worry
about kicking it later.
854
00:37:28,332 --> 00:37:29,768
Let's not rush things.
855
00:37:29,768 --> 00:37:31,988
What matters the most
is that you're home safe.
856
00:37:31,988 --> 00:37:35,165
Oh, babe. [kisses]
Oh, my baby.
857
00:37:39,778 --> 00:37:41,302
Hey, Ry?
858
00:37:41,302 --> 00:37:42,912
[muffled music playing
on speaker]
859
00:37:42,912 --> 00:37:44,827
Got Chinese food!
860
00:37:45,741 --> 00:37:48,265
I got sweet and sour chicken,
861
00:37:48,265 --> 00:37:51,050
beef with broccoli,
steamed rice.
862
00:37:51,790 --> 00:37:52,748
Where are ya?
863
00:37:53,401 --> 00:37:54,706
Hey, Ry?
864
00:37:55,968 --> 00:37:57,100
Ryan!
865
00:37:57,100 --> 00:37:58,754
[hip-hop music playing
on speaker]
866
00:37:58,754 --> 00:38:01,191
[gasps] What the...
Daniel, get out!
867
00:38:01,191 --> 00:38:02,497
- [boy whimpering]
- Hey. Hey!
868
00:38:02,497 --> 00:38:04,194
[boy] Okay. Whoa, whoa! Okay.
869
00:38:04,194 --> 00:38:06,283
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down!
It's not what you think.
870
00:38:06,283 --> 00:38:08,546
I'm pretty sure it is
what I think. How old are you?
871
00:38:08,546 --> 00:38:09,721
Daniel! Get off of him.
872
00:38:09,721 --> 00:38:11,070
Shut up!
873
00:38:11,070 --> 00:38:12,681
I asked you a question, boy.
How old are you?
874
00:38:12,681 --> 00:38:15,031
- I'm 20.
- She's 16, and I'm an ex-cop.
875
00:38:15,031 --> 00:38:16,598
Looks like you picked
the wrong girl.
876
00:38:16,598 --> 00:38:17,816
You're choking him!
877
00:38:17,816 --> 00:38:19,644
She said she was 18 online.
878
00:38:19,644 --> 00:38:22,343
If I ever catch you
near my granddaughter again,
879
00:38:22,343 --> 00:38:23,996
I'm gonna rip
your fucking dick off
880
00:38:23,996 --> 00:38:25,607
and shove it down your throat.
You feel me?
881
00:38:25,607 --> 00:38:27,260
[gasping] Yes, sir. Yes.
882
00:38:27,260 --> 00:38:29,045
Get the fuck out of here.
883
00:38:29,045 --> 00:38:31,482
Yes, sir.
Uh, I need my clothes.
884
00:38:31,482 --> 00:38:34,180
They're in my house.
They're my clothes now.
885
00:38:34,180 --> 00:38:35,356
Run away!
886
00:38:37,749 --> 00:38:38,881
[Ryan] Daniel!
887
00:38:38,881 --> 00:38:40,926
Get out of my fucking room!
888
00:38:40,926 --> 00:38:42,275
What the fuck?
889
00:38:42,275 --> 00:38:44,277
[loudly] Hey, look, everybody!
890
00:38:44,277 --> 00:38:46,758
Statutory rapist
from Williamsburg!
891
00:38:46,758 --> 00:38:47,977
I need my keys!
892
00:38:47,977 --> 00:38:51,328
Oh, his keys! His keys!
Look at him!
893
00:38:51,328 --> 00:38:54,679
He's scrambling to his car!
Statutory rapist!
894
00:38:54,679 --> 00:38:55,898
Hey, Belinda,
895
00:38:55,898 --> 00:38:58,422
I found this fool in bed
with my Ryan.
896
00:38:58,422 --> 00:39:00,293
She said...
She said she was 18 online.
897
00:39:00,293 --> 00:39:01,730
You're a fuckboy.
898
00:39:01,730 --> 00:39:03,993
He's a fuckboy! That's what
the kids call them!
899
00:39:03,993 --> 00:39:06,561
Get out of
our neighborhood, fuckboy!
900
00:39:06,561 --> 00:39:08,127
[grunting] Okay. Okay!
901
00:39:08,127 --> 00:39:09,215
[Belinda]
Get out of here, fuckboy!
902
00:39:09,215 --> 00:39:10,303
All right! All right!
903
00:39:10,303 --> 00:39:11,566
Right fucking now!
904
00:39:11,566 --> 00:39:13,655
- Wet, flaccid fuckboy!
- [boy] Okay, okay!
905
00:39:13,655 --> 00:39:14,743
Okay!
906
00:39:17,963 --> 00:39:20,009
I cannot believe
you just did that!
907
00:39:20,009 --> 00:39:21,097
Give me your phone.
908
00:39:22,446 --> 00:39:24,187
Give me the fucking phone
right now!
909
00:39:29,235 --> 00:39:30,715
You're grounded.
910
00:39:30,715 --> 00:39:33,979
You hear me?
You're grounded until...
911
00:39:33,979 --> 00:39:37,113
Shit, I can't think of
when you won't be grounded.
912
00:39:37,113 --> 00:39:38,941
You can't just lock me up, Daniel.
913
00:39:38,941 --> 00:39:41,900
For the last
fucking time, Ryan,
914
00:39:41,900 --> 00:39:43,946
you call me "Grandpa."
915
00:39:43,946 --> 00:39:44,947
[door slams]
916
00:39:46,688 --> 00:39:50,474
[Ryan crying] I hate you!
I fucking hate you!
917
00:39:50,474 --> 00:39:52,737
[unnerving music playing]
918
00:39:58,830 --> 00:40:00,441
[breathing shakily]
919
00:41:00,109 --> 00:41:02,851
["To the Mountains" playing]
920
00:41:06,158 --> 00:41:09,988
♪ Oh, I'm headed
to the mountains ♪
921
00:41:12,251 --> 00:41:15,733
♪ I'll be back
in a week or two ♪
922
00:41:17,561 --> 00:41:19,824
♪ Don't you try to reach me ♪
923
00:41:19,824 --> 00:41:22,566
♪ 'Cause I won't
pick up for you ♪
924
00:41:25,830 --> 00:41:28,485
♪ I've got some things
I neeed to do ♪
925
00:41:43,761 --> 00:41:47,983
♪ Oh, I'm headed
to the mountains ♪
926
00:41:49,985 --> 00:41:52,944
♪ The only place
I feel at peace ♪
927
00:41:55,556 --> 00:41:58,036
♪ And I knew
you'd come after me ♪
928
00:41:58,036 --> 00:41:59,211
♪ So I threw away
your keys... ♪
929
00:41:59,211 --> 00:42:00,778
[indistinct chatter]
930
00:42:02,475 --> 00:42:08,960
♪ But I know you'd never go
when I say leave ♪
931
00:42:08,960 --> 00:42:14,096
♪ I'm headed to the mountains
don't wait up for me ♪
932
00:42:14,096 --> 00:42:16,533
[Allison breathing heavily]
933
00:42:23,888 --> 00:42:25,586
Allison, don't go.
934
00:42:27,326 --> 00:42:30,634
- This was a mistake.
- No. No, it isn't.
935
00:42:30,634 --> 00:42:34,638
Trust me, I know
how hard it is to get here.
936
00:42:34,638 --> 00:42:37,598
It's damn near impossible,
and you did it.
937
00:42:37,598 --> 00:42:39,730
Don't run away now
because of me.
938
00:42:39,730 --> 00:42:40,992
There are thousands
of meetings.
939
00:42:40,992 --> 00:42:42,603
- I'll find another one.
- Well, yeah,
940
00:42:42,603 --> 00:42:44,343
but this one
has the best snacks.
941
00:42:44,343 --> 00:42:45,997
- I wanna go.
- No.
942
00:42:45,997 --> 00:42:48,521
No, no. You've made it
this far, and I wouldn't.
943
00:42:48,521 --> 00:42:50,698
I don't wanna be here.
944
00:42:50,698 --> 00:42:52,264
Nobody does in the beginning.
945
00:42:52,264 --> 00:42:54,702
[tearfully]
I don't wanna be anywhere.
946
00:42:54,702 --> 00:42:57,356
Then you are definitely
in the right spot.
947
00:42:58,444 --> 00:42:59,794
I thought you were sober.
948
00:43:00,577 --> 00:43:01,970
Ten years.
949
00:43:01,970 --> 00:43:05,713
I kinda slacked off
coming to regular meetings,
950
00:43:05,713 --> 00:43:07,453
and then lately, I...
951
00:43:08,498 --> 00:43:10,500
I realized I need the support.
952
00:43:11,501 --> 00:43:12,720
Because of what happened?
953
00:43:12,720 --> 00:43:15,853
No, no, no! No, it's...
954
00:43:15,853 --> 00:43:17,420
Is the accident the reason
why you came back?
955
00:43:17,420 --> 00:43:18,856
No, I just feel that...
956
00:43:18,856 --> 00:43:20,597
Daniel, am I the reason
why you're back here?
957
00:43:20,597 --> 00:43:21,729
Yes!
958
00:43:25,689 --> 00:43:27,038
Yes, of course.
959
00:43:29,084 --> 00:43:30,607
What the hell
do you want me to say?
960
00:43:31,477 --> 00:43:33,392
- I'm sorry.
- No.
961
00:43:33,392 --> 00:43:35,307
Look.
962
00:43:35,307 --> 00:43:39,747
I got ten years,
and lately, I've been feeling
963
00:43:39,747 --> 00:43:43,272
like I really,
really want a drink.
964
00:43:45,100 --> 00:43:46,449
This works.
965
00:43:48,712 --> 00:43:49,800
Thank you.
966
00:43:49,800 --> 00:43:52,847
Um, I'm gonna find
somewhere else.
967
00:43:52,847 --> 00:43:54,631
There are thousands
of these meetings.
968
00:43:54,631 --> 00:43:57,895
Yeah, but somehow you found
your way to this one.
969
00:43:59,505 --> 00:44:00,898
Now isn't that something?
970
00:44:03,814 --> 00:44:05,424
All right, come on.
971
00:44:10,038 --> 00:44:11,169
Come on.
972
00:44:13,258 --> 00:44:14,303
Okay.
973
00:44:15,870 --> 00:44:17,872
[woman] Everybody, welcome.
974
00:44:17,872 --> 00:44:19,395
This is the regular meeting
975
00:44:19,395 --> 00:44:22,093
of the Live and Let Live group
of Alcoholics Anonymous.
976
00:44:22,093 --> 00:44:23,399
My name is Simone,
977
00:44:23,399 --> 00:44:26,184
and I'm an alcoholic,
and your secretary.
978
00:44:26,184 --> 00:44:29,100
Let us open the meeting
with the Serenity Prayer.
979
00:44:31,276 --> 00:44:32,408
God...
980
00:44:32,408 --> 00:44:33,583
[all] ...grant me the serenity
981
00:44:33,583 --> 00:44:36,107
to accept the things
I cannot change,
982
00:44:36,107 --> 00:44:38,762
the courage
to change the things I can,
983
00:44:38,762 --> 00:44:41,809
and the wisdom
to know the difference.
984
00:44:47,597 --> 00:44:51,253
Hey, you got up awfully early
this morning.
985
00:44:51,253 --> 00:44:53,255
I went to an NA meeting.
986
00:44:53,255 --> 00:44:55,997
- [gasps] What? You did?
- Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.
987
00:44:55,997 --> 00:44:59,740
Oh, Allie.
I'm so happy to hear that.
988
00:44:59,740 --> 00:45:02,090
[Allison] Well, I'm not saying
I'm gonna go again.
989
00:45:02,090 --> 00:45:04,396
Well, you gotta start somewhere,
990
00:45:04,396 --> 00:45:05,963
and sounds like you did.
991
00:45:05,963 --> 00:45:07,530
- Mm-hmm.
- So that's good.
992
00:45:07,530 --> 00:45:12,143
I don't know if I'll be able
to just quit, though, Mom.
993
00:45:12,143 --> 00:45:14,232
I think I need real help,
994
00:45:14,232 --> 00:45:16,844
like an in-patient program
or something.
995
00:45:16,844 --> 00:45:18,715
Well, honey,
neither of us has insurance,
996
00:45:18,715 --> 00:45:21,413
so how the hell are we
supposed to pay for that?
997
00:45:21,413 --> 00:45:22,980
I mean, you gotta get a job.
998
00:45:22,980 --> 00:45:25,766
Mom, who's gonna hire me
like this?
999
00:45:25,766 --> 00:45:27,855
- Come on.
- Like, no...
1000
00:45:27,855 --> 00:45:29,030
What do you mean?
1001
00:45:29,030 --> 00:45:30,727
You're a beautiful
26-year-old woman.
1002
00:45:30,727 --> 00:45:33,425
- You're smart, you're funny...
- No, I'm not. No, I'm not.
1003
00:45:33,425 --> 00:45:35,166
- Yes, you are.
- No, I'm not.
1004
00:45:35,166 --> 00:45:36,907
That's the old me
you're describing.
1005
00:45:36,907 --> 00:45:37,995
You're still you.
1006
00:45:37,995 --> 00:45:40,955
No, I'm not! I'm...
1007
00:45:40,955 --> 00:45:43,261
[sighs] I'm something else.
1008
00:45:45,046 --> 00:45:46,221
I'm something...
1009
00:45:47,265 --> 00:45:48,789
Ugh. Um...
1010
00:45:54,229 --> 00:45:56,274
I was thinking, um...
1011
00:45:59,843 --> 00:46:03,499
You know how Dad was probably
gonna get me a wedding gift,
1012
00:46:03,499 --> 00:46:05,806
or, well, at least
he was gonna come, right?
1013
00:46:05,806 --> 00:46:07,677
Maybe instead
of whatever it was
1014
00:46:07,677 --> 00:46:09,505
that he was gonna give me,
1015
00:46:11,028 --> 00:46:15,380
maybe he could help pay
for me to get help.
1016
00:46:15,380 --> 00:46:17,818
And so, I was wondering if you
1017
00:46:18,514 --> 00:46:20,124
would call him for me.
1018
00:46:20,124 --> 00:46:23,432
Allie, I will never speak
to that man as long as I live.
1019
00:46:23,432 --> 00:46:24,912
Do you know what he did?
1020
00:46:24,912 --> 00:46:27,566
He packed his car up,
and he left us with nothing.
1021
00:46:27,566 --> 00:46:29,568
But it is what it is, okay?
1022
00:46:29,568 --> 00:46:33,007
So, you gotta pull yourself up
by your bootstraps, now.
1023
00:46:34,617 --> 00:46:35,836
Thanks, Mom.
1024
00:46:35,836 --> 00:46:37,620
Yeah, I'm sorry
I can't get over this
1025
00:46:37,620 --> 00:46:39,448
as fast as you want me to.
1026
00:46:39,448 --> 00:46:41,058
- Allie...
- Nah.
1027
00:46:42,103 --> 00:46:44,366
[somber music playing]
1028
00:46:52,200 --> 00:46:53,854
[Daniel] Well, look who it is.
1029
00:46:54,593 --> 00:46:56,900
Hi, Dad.
1030
00:46:56,900 --> 00:47:00,077
What brings you to the less
glamorous side of the river?
1031
00:47:00,077 --> 00:47:02,471
Ryan asked me to come see her.
1032
00:47:02,471 --> 00:47:05,126
Turns out, she really
wanted me to talk to you.
1033
00:47:05,126 --> 00:47:07,476
- Oh?
- She's worried about you.
1034
00:47:07,476 --> 00:47:09,173
She's worried about me?
1035
00:47:10,174 --> 00:47:12,046
That girl's crazy.
1036
00:47:12,046 --> 00:47:14,962
She says she thinks
you need a friend.
1037
00:47:14,962 --> 00:47:16,746
Hell, I don't need a friend.
1038
00:47:16,746 --> 00:47:18,922
I need a dog crate
the size of a teenager.
1039
00:47:22,360 --> 00:47:24,493
Look, Nathan,
I understand your need
1040
00:47:24,493 --> 00:47:26,451
to move on
after the breakup...
1041
00:47:28,889 --> 00:47:29,933
but, hell, I never imagined
1042
00:47:29,933 --> 00:47:32,849
I'd be doing this
all by myself.
1043
00:47:32,849 --> 00:47:34,503
You raised two kids.
1044
00:47:34,503 --> 00:47:35,765
I had your mother.
1045
00:47:37,593 --> 00:47:40,204
And you and your sister were
much better behaved than Ry.
1046
00:47:40,813 --> 00:47:41,814
[Nathan scoffs]
1047
00:47:42,946 --> 00:47:45,383
What? Come on.
Speak your mind, son.
1048
00:47:45,383 --> 00:47:48,299
We were good because
we were terrified of you.
1049
00:47:49,997 --> 00:47:51,781
So, I'm not surprised
1050
00:47:51,781 --> 00:47:53,217
you don't have any tools
in your arsenal
1051
00:47:53,217 --> 00:47:55,437
since you lost
the only one that you had.
1052
00:47:55,437 --> 00:47:56,917
Fear.
1053
00:47:59,920 --> 00:48:05,490
I have apologized 100 times
to you for the way I was.
1054
00:48:08,015 --> 00:48:11,540
Your sister found a way
to give me another chance.
1055
00:48:11,540 --> 00:48:13,194
How come you can't?
1056
00:48:13,194 --> 00:48:16,675
'Cause Molly never really got
the brunt of it, did she?
1057
00:48:16,675 --> 00:48:19,722
I guarantee you that if
she was standing here now,
1058
00:48:19,722 --> 00:48:22,333
she would be begging you
to drop this shit,
1059
00:48:22,333 --> 00:48:23,900
and help me raise her child.
1060
00:48:23,900 --> 00:48:25,423
Well, she isn't.
1061
00:48:27,338 --> 00:48:28,818
No, she's not.
1062
00:48:32,865 --> 00:48:34,606
I have to catch the train.
1063
00:48:35,781 --> 00:48:37,218
I saw Allison.
1064
00:48:41,700 --> 00:48:42,832
Where?
1065
00:48:42,832 --> 00:48:44,921
Not supposed to say.
1066
00:48:46,009 --> 00:48:47,576
AA?
1067
00:48:47,576 --> 00:48:48,794
Not supposed to say.
1068
00:48:48,794 --> 00:48:50,144
What the hell
does she need AA for?
1069
00:48:50,144 --> 00:48:51,928
- I'm not supposed to...
- To say.
1070
00:48:54,409 --> 00:48:55,410
I got it.
1071
00:48:57,151 --> 00:48:59,501
Of all the meetings,
she ends up at yours?
1072
00:48:59,501 --> 00:49:02,025
She saw me,
she tried to run away,
1073
00:49:02,025 --> 00:49:04,245
but I pulled her back.
1074
00:49:04,245 --> 00:49:05,463
Why?
1075
00:49:06,638 --> 00:49:07,857
She's suffering, Nathan.
1076
00:49:09,424 --> 00:49:10,468
Broken.
1077
00:49:11,339 --> 00:49:12,427
Lost.
1078
00:49:12,427 --> 00:49:14,820
You're the one who blamed her!
1079
00:49:15,952 --> 00:49:17,345
I stood by her!
1080
00:49:17,345 --> 00:49:20,609
Yeah, until she left your ass.
1081
00:49:20,609 --> 00:49:24,091
Sorry. Sorry, that came out
harsher than I meant.
1082
00:49:24,091 --> 00:49:26,136
I have to catch the train.
1083
00:49:26,136 --> 00:49:27,485
[Daniel] Please, Nathan.
1084
00:49:28,312 --> 00:49:30,488
I need help.
1085
00:49:30,488 --> 00:49:33,274
Ryan asked me to come by
and say "hi" to you.
1086
00:49:34,318 --> 00:49:35,580
And I did.
1087
00:49:36,929 --> 00:49:37,930
Okay.
1088
00:49:40,629 --> 00:49:41,717
Hi.
1089
00:49:53,555 --> 00:49:55,731
[playing classical music]
1090
00:50:00,866 --> 00:50:03,478
- Best first date ever.
- I heard that.
1091
00:50:09,788 --> 00:50:11,051
[Allison laughing]
1092
00:50:17,492 --> 00:50:20,364
[Daniel] I used to drink
whiskey until I blacked out.
1093
00:50:21,800 --> 00:50:23,889
Wake up the next morning
to find out
1094
00:50:25,065 --> 00:50:27,328
what I had done,
who I had been.
1095
00:50:29,895 --> 00:50:30,983
[chuckles]
1096
00:50:33,247 --> 00:50:35,031
My father was a drunk.
1097
00:50:37,947 --> 00:50:42,082
He beat me
right up to the day he died.
1098
00:50:44,606 --> 00:50:48,088
And I vowed I would never
lay a hand on my children.
1099
00:50:50,394 --> 00:50:51,743
And I didn't...
1100
00:50:53,789 --> 00:50:55,312
while I was sober.
1101
00:50:58,228 --> 00:50:59,838
But in the blackness...
1102
00:51:03,625 --> 00:51:07,368
I always denied because
I really couldn't remember.
1103
00:51:09,109 --> 00:51:10,936
Sometimes there'd be a bruise.
1104
00:51:13,025 --> 00:51:16,420
"Oh, you must have
fallen down.
1105
00:51:16,420 --> 00:51:18,509
"I'm your daddy.
I would never hurt you."
1106
00:51:20,076 --> 00:51:22,600
August 11th, '99...
1107
00:51:25,908 --> 00:51:30,347
I woke up on my front porch to
the sound of church bells...
1108
00:51:33,263 --> 00:51:34,960
and an ice cream truck.
1109
00:51:36,005 --> 00:51:38,094
So, I knew it was Sunday.
1110
00:51:38,094 --> 00:51:42,272
First thing
I saw was my captain
1111
00:51:43,534 --> 00:51:46,058
standing over me,
1112
00:51:46,058 --> 00:51:48,670
poking me in the ribs
with his nightstick.
1113
00:51:51,977 --> 00:51:53,327
An ambulance.
1114
00:51:55,155 --> 00:51:58,897
My son, Nathan,
sitting in the back,
1115
00:52:00,290 --> 00:52:01,726
bleeding from the head.
1116
00:52:03,163 --> 00:52:05,774
Medics had bought him
a popsicle.
1117
00:52:08,080 --> 00:52:09,952
Turns out that... [sighs]
1118
00:52:11,954 --> 00:52:13,782
in the blackness...
1119
00:52:17,351 --> 00:52:20,484
I had beat him so bad
1120
00:52:20,484 --> 00:52:23,705
that he lost the hearing
in his right ear.
1121
00:52:23,705 --> 00:52:24,793
Forever.
1122
00:52:26,229 --> 00:52:29,537
And to this day,
every time I see him,
1123
00:52:29,537 --> 00:52:33,062
I beg for his forgiveness.
1124
00:52:34,498 --> 00:52:36,544
It's just a little dance
we do.
1125
00:52:37,849 --> 00:52:39,460
A mere formality.
1126
00:52:41,462 --> 00:52:43,072
Because we both know...
1127
00:52:45,901 --> 00:52:48,425
that there are some things
that are just
1128
00:52:50,079 --> 00:52:52,037
impossible to forgive.
1129
00:52:56,259 --> 00:53:01,264
I do believe
even God knows that.
1130
00:53:08,619 --> 00:53:11,056
When I was a cop,
I used to eat here every day.
1131
00:53:12,014 --> 00:53:13,711
Free coffee refills.
1132
00:53:16,540 --> 00:53:17,541
You hungry?
1133
00:53:19,239 --> 00:53:20,240
No.
1134
00:53:20,979 --> 00:53:21,980
[Daniel] Hmm.
1135
00:53:24,461 --> 00:53:26,681
Funny, the things
we stop caring about.
1136
00:53:28,770 --> 00:53:30,467
I used to want to travel.
1137
00:53:32,121 --> 00:53:34,341
I would leaf through
National Geographic
1138
00:53:34,341 --> 00:53:36,343
and dog-ear
all of the exotic places
1139
00:53:36,343 --> 00:53:38,649
I would visit once I retired.
1140
00:53:41,435 --> 00:53:43,437
Never do that now.
1141
00:53:43,437 --> 00:53:46,178
- You still could.
- No, no. I couldn't.
1142
00:53:51,271 --> 00:53:56,928
I wasn't drunk,
or on anything, by the way.
1143
00:53:57,712 --> 00:53:58,713
What?
1144
00:53:59,975 --> 00:54:02,412
When I saw you the other day
at the meeting,
1145
00:54:04,109 --> 00:54:08,244
I instantly got worried
that you may have thought
1146
00:54:08,244 --> 00:54:11,421
that I was drinking
or on drugs
1147
00:54:11,421 --> 00:54:13,118
on the day of the accident,
and I wasn't.
1148
00:54:13,118 --> 00:54:15,556
I was sober.
It wasn't my fault.
1149
00:54:17,297 --> 00:54:19,560
I have every report
ever written
1150
00:54:19,560 --> 00:54:21,344
committed to memory.
1151
00:54:21,997 --> 00:54:23,085
Right.
1152
00:54:25,392 --> 00:54:26,654
So, you know that it was
1153
00:54:26,654 --> 00:54:28,395
the backhoe guy's fault, Alvarez.
1154
00:54:28,395 --> 00:54:30,092
I don't wanna get
into that all right now.
1155
00:54:30,092 --> 00:54:31,615
Okay, yeah, you're right.
1156
00:54:36,577 --> 00:54:39,275
Nathan said that he was deaf
since birth.
1157
00:54:40,624 --> 00:54:41,973
He never told you?
1158
00:54:43,366 --> 00:54:45,542
Maybe he wanted me
to like you.
1159
00:54:47,109 --> 00:54:48,763
I doubt that.
1160
00:54:52,419 --> 00:54:56,510
I thought that raising Ryan
would offer me the chance
1161
00:54:56,510 --> 00:54:59,164
to be a better father
than I ever was.
1162
00:55:00,035 --> 00:55:01,776
Shit.
1163
00:55:01,776 --> 00:55:04,735
I'm in way over my head.
1164
00:55:04,735 --> 00:55:07,999
I got one of those audiobooks
from the library.
1165
00:55:07,999 --> 00:55:09,261
How to Talk to a Teen.
1166
00:55:09,261 --> 00:55:11,220
[chuckles] Oh, yeah?
1167
00:55:11,220 --> 00:55:12,874
How's that working out?
1168
00:55:12,874 --> 00:55:15,485
- Well, it's from the '80s...
- [laughs]
1169
00:55:15,485 --> 00:55:16,834
It's on a cassette.
1170
00:55:16,834 --> 00:55:17,922
Right.
1171
00:55:17,922 --> 00:55:19,533
Its advice is,
1172
00:55:20,882 --> 00:55:22,362
"Chaperone a dance."
1173
00:55:22,840 --> 00:55:24,494
[laughs]
1174
00:55:26,104 --> 00:55:28,368
"Chaperone a dance."
1175
00:55:28,368 --> 00:55:30,282
I just caught her having sex
1176
00:55:30,282 --> 00:55:32,546
with a boy
who looked like a man.
1177
00:55:34,939 --> 00:55:36,811
A dance would be delightful.
1178
00:55:38,203 --> 00:55:40,162
Can I give you some advice
1179
00:55:41,163 --> 00:55:43,165
from a former teenage girl?
1180
00:55:44,949 --> 00:55:46,429
She's gonna have sex.
1181
00:55:47,865 --> 00:55:50,825
And nothing you say
is gonna change that.
1182
00:55:53,305 --> 00:55:55,482
Just make sure
she's on birth control.
1183
00:55:55,482 --> 00:55:56,700
- Birth control?
- Yeah.
1184
00:55:56,700 --> 00:55:59,137
She's 16!
1185
00:55:59,137 --> 00:56:01,357
No, we'll be going
the abstinence route.
1186
00:56:02,445 --> 00:56:03,751
No offense, Daniel,
1187
00:56:03,751 --> 00:56:06,536
but, uh, there's a knot
in your logic.
1188
00:56:08,016 --> 00:56:09,409
You're trying to solve
a problem
1189
00:56:09,409 --> 00:56:11,236
by looking
in the other direction.
1190
00:56:14,675 --> 00:56:16,633
I could talk to her
if you want me to.
1191
00:56:16,633 --> 00:56:18,592
Oh, well, no thanks.
1192
00:56:18,592 --> 00:56:20,202
- It's okay. Of course.
- That's not appropriate.
1193
00:56:20,202 --> 00:56:21,638
I don't even know
why I just said that.
1194
00:56:21,638 --> 00:56:22,900
- I'm sorry.
- No, it's okay.
1195
00:56:22,900 --> 00:56:24,424
It's just that
I don't think that it's...
1196
00:56:24,424 --> 00:56:25,990
I just felt the need,
1197
00:56:27,470 --> 00:56:30,430
um, the instinct
to help in some way.
1198
00:56:31,387 --> 00:56:32,910
It's the least I could do.
1199
00:56:40,483 --> 00:56:42,398
I don't know how to do this.
1200
00:56:43,399 --> 00:56:44,356
What?
1201
00:56:44,879 --> 00:56:46,402
Start all over.
1202
00:56:48,186 --> 00:56:49,536
How do you do it?
1203
00:56:50,798 --> 00:56:52,190
[Daniel] Takes work.
1204
00:56:55,193 --> 00:56:58,153
- Can I tell you a secret?
- Sure.
1205
00:57:03,158 --> 00:57:05,377
I'm not sure I have the will.
1206
00:57:27,530 --> 00:57:30,054
What does "amor fati" mean?
1207
00:57:31,621 --> 00:57:32,709
[Daniel sighs]
1208
00:57:33,971 --> 00:57:35,582
Certain things are private.
1209
00:57:36,757 --> 00:57:38,585
Do you think I'm fucked up?
1210
00:57:40,021 --> 00:57:42,066
Are you high right now?
1211
00:57:43,372 --> 00:57:44,504
No.
1212
00:57:45,896 --> 00:57:47,898
I was a cop for 40 years.
1213
00:57:47,898 --> 00:57:49,596
I was an addict for 50.
1214
00:57:51,119 --> 00:57:53,208
So, I'm gonna ask you again.
1215
00:57:54,426 --> 00:57:55,950
Are you high right now?
1216
00:57:56,951 --> 00:57:58,169
Well, I...
1217
00:57:59,997 --> 00:58:01,651
I broke a pill in half.
1218
00:58:01,651 --> 00:58:03,087
So, half.
1219
00:58:04,915 --> 00:58:07,352
Yes, I think
you're fucked up, Allison.
1220
00:58:10,268 --> 00:58:11,574
Not half.
1221
00:58:12,444 --> 00:58:14,316
All fucked up.
1222
00:58:14,316 --> 00:58:16,231
Do you think
I'll ever pull out of this?
1223
00:58:18,059 --> 00:58:23,368
I mean, like, maybe one day
I might be the kind of person
1224
00:58:24,805 --> 00:58:26,284
that people want
their granddaughter
1225
00:58:26,284 --> 00:58:28,330
to hang out with?
1226
00:58:28,330 --> 00:58:30,027
I have no idea.
1227
00:58:31,812 --> 00:58:33,074
Me neither.
1228
00:58:35,903 --> 00:58:38,253
[soft country music playing]
1229
00:58:48,393 --> 00:58:51,396
Can I have
my phone back, please?
1230
00:58:51,396 --> 00:58:54,225
I'm running out of ideas
on how to handle you, Ryan.
1231
00:58:55,313 --> 00:58:56,880
Grandpa,
everybody at my age has sex.
1232
00:58:56,880 --> 00:58:58,752
It's, like, not a big deal.
1233
00:58:58,752 --> 00:59:00,144
I know it was different
when you were younger,
1234
00:59:00,144 --> 00:59:02,973
but that's just, like,
not how it is anymore.
1235
00:59:06,934 --> 00:59:09,284
[smacks lips] Well,
let me ask you something.
1236
00:59:15,507 --> 00:59:16,552
Are you...
1237
00:59:19,076 --> 00:59:21,122
Are you using
1238
00:59:21,949 --> 00:59:24,255
any protection?
1239
00:59:24,255 --> 00:59:25,866
Oh, my God!
1240
00:59:25,866 --> 00:59:28,564
I am so not gonna talk about
this with my grandfather.
1241
00:59:28,564 --> 00:59:30,566
How the hell
do you think I feel?
1242
00:59:32,873 --> 00:59:34,614
[both sigh]
1243
00:59:34,614 --> 00:59:37,138
- I know you're upset.
- I'm not upset.
1244
00:59:37,138 --> 00:59:38,400
Maybe you should go back
1245
00:59:39,270 --> 00:59:40,794
and see that therapist again.
1246
00:59:40,794 --> 00:59:42,099
No. I just
1247
00:59:43,231 --> 00:59:45,886
want my phone back.
1248
00:59:45,886 --> 00:59:49,106
I don't have any friends
at Columbia
1249
00:59:49,106 --> 00:59:51,413
and I want to
1250
00:59:51,413 --> 00:59:54,068
hang onto the few I still have
on Long Beach Island.
1251
00:59:55,417 --> 00:59:57,114
How come
you can't make friends?
1252
00:59:57,114 --> 00:59:58,768
I've been through a lot
this year.
1253
00:59:59,290 --> 01:00:00,552
[Daniel] Hmm.
1254
01:00:01,510 --> 01:00:03,991
And nobody really understands.
1255
01:00:05,209 --> 01:00:07,647
They try. Some, but...
1256
01:00:08,604 --> 01:00:10,214
I mean, it's fake.
1257
01:00:10,214 --> 01:00:12,042
Don't you think
most people are so fake?
1258
01:00:13,478 --> 01:00:16,090
I would probably say
"duplicitous."
1259
01:00:17,091 --> 01:00:18,179
What does that mean?
1260
01:00:19,006 --> 01:00:20,529
Fake.
1261
01:00:20,529 --> 01:00:21,661
[chuckles]
1262
01:00:23,619 --> 01:00:24,968
I'm on your side.
1263
01:00:26,927 --> 01:00:27,971
I know.
1264
01:00:28,624 --> 01:00:30,278
Tell you what.
1265
01:00:30,278 --> 01:00:33,150
You can have your phone back
1266
01:00:33,150 --> 01:00:37,024
if you promise to start taking
birth control pills.
1267
01:00:37,024 --> 01:00:39,026
Ugh! Oh, my God! Daniel!
1268
01:00:39,026 --> 01:00:40,157
Grandpa!
1269
01:00:41,028 --> 01:00:42,029
[sighs]
1270
01:00:42,986 --> 01:00:44,074
Grandpa.
1271
01:00:45,510 --> 01:00:48,383
Is it a deal?
I'll make the appointment.
1272
01:00:50,037 --> 01:00:52,300
Fine. Fine.
1273
01:00:52,300 --> 01:00:53,780
I just
1274
01:00:53,780 --> 01:00:56,826
never want to talk to you
about sex ever again.
1275
01:00:58,045 --> 01:01:00,177
Oh, really?
1276
01:01:01,048 --> 01:01:02,832
'Cause I just love this shit.
1277
01:01:09,752 --> 01:01:11,580
Have you ever been
on campus before?
1278
01:01:11,580 --> 01:01:13,277
Not since I was a kid.
1279
01:01:13,277 --> 01:01:14,931
I used to do swim meets here.
1280
01:01:14,931 --> 01:01:16,237
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
1281
01:01:16,237 --> 01:01:18,239
- You were a swimmer?
- [chuckling] Uh, yeah.
1282
01:01:18,239 --> 01:01:20,763
Well, I was 12, but yeah,
I was pretty good.
1283
01:01:20,763 --> 01:01:22,896
I still have all the trophies
and the ribbons.
1284
01:01:22,896 --> 01:01:24,854
- That's cool.
- Mmm.
1285
01:01:24,854 --> 01:01:27,727
- What stroke?
- Mostly freestyle.
1286
01:01:29,119 --> 01:01:30,381
Why'd you stop?
1287
01:01:31,252 --> 01:01:34,472
Um, my dad left.
1288
01:01:34,472 --> 01:01:37,301
Yeah, it was kinda the thing
that we used to do together.
1289
01:01:37,301 --> 01:01:39,739
He would cheer so loud
I could hear him underwater.
1290
01:01:39,739 --> 01:01:41,088
[chuckles]
1291
01:01:41,088 --> 01:01:43,090
Seemed kind of pointless
to do it without him.
1292
01:01:44,439 --> 01:01:46,833
- Where'd he go?
- Ohio.
1293
01:01:48,182 --> 01:01:49,749
Started a whole new family
in Ohio.
1294
01:01:49,749 --> 01:01:51,315
Wow.
1295
01:01:51,315 --> 01:01:54,057
He has 10-year-old twins. Yeah.
1296
01:01:54,057 --> 01:01:56,146
I don't know
if they swim or not, though.
1297
01:01:56,146 --> 01:01:58,714
Oh, man. I am always
just amazed at people
1298
01:01:58,714 --> 01:02:01,282
who can, like, up and leave
their kids like that.
1299
01:02:01,282 --> 01:02:02,413
[Allison] Mmm.
1300
01:02:02,413 --> 01:02:03,763
I just don't know
how you could,
1301
01:02:03,763 --> 01:02:06,853
like, fucking sleep at night.
1302
01:02:06,853 --> 01:02:10,944
For so long, I thought
that I'd done something wrong.
1303
01:02:10,944 --> 01:02:14,382
Like, it was my fault,
or I'd let him down.
1304
01:02:15,557 --> 01:02:18,429
And then I just realized,
1305
01:02:18,429 --> 01:02:21,737
I don't know, maybe
some people just aren't good.
1306
01:02:21,737 --> 01:02:22,869
[Simone] Hmm.
1307
01:02:24,392 --> 01:02:26,698
It's kinda like he, like,
restarted a level
1308
01:02:26,698 --> 01:02:29,136
in a video game
with a fresh life.
1309
01:02:29,136 --> 01:02:31,660
- [both laugh]
- That's exactly what he did!
1310
01:02:31,660 --> 01:02:35,664
He packed up the car,
and left his Rolex
1311
01:02:35,664 --> 01:02:38,319
in the attic of my dollhouse,
1312
01:02:38,319 --> 01:02:39,886
and he drove away.
1313
01:02:43,715 --> 01:02:44,760
Hey, let's sit
for a second, okay?
1314
01:02:44,760 --> 01:02:46,544
- Yeah, yeah.
- [clears throat]
1315
01:02:48,198 --> 01:02:51,811
Uh... So, I'll sponsor you.
1316
01:02:51,811 --> 01:02:54,944
- Okay.
- But, um,
1317
01:02:54,944 --> 01:02:56,859
you gotta start
taking this shit seriously.
1318
01:02:58,339 --> 01:03:00,776
You can't keep coming
to meetings high.
1319
01:03:00,776 --> 01:03:02,212
What? [chuckles]
1320
01:03:05,041 --> 01:03:06,782
How did you know?
1321
01:03:06,782 --> 01:03:08,131
[laughs]
1322
01:03:08,131 --> 01:03:10,917
Uh, because I was you.
1323
01:03:10,917 --> 01:03:13,833
And I've helped
dozens of women who were you.
1324
01:03:15,269 --> 01:03:19,055
And some beat it,
and some are dead.
1325
01:03:21,884 --> 01:03:23,146
But, you know,
1326
01:03:24,321 --> 01:03:26,758
if you want my time,
you gotta commit.
1327
01:03:26,758 --> 01:03:28,064
Because I have a toddler
so I just
1328
01:03:28,064 --> 01:03:29,370
- don't have time for bullshit.
- Yeah.
1329
01:03:29,370 --> 01:03:33,113
No, I do. I... I...
I really wanna beat it.
1330
01:03:33,113 --> 01:03:35,898
Then I want you to do
90 meetings in 90 days.
1331
01:03:35,898 --> 01:03:37,465
- Wow.
- Yeah.
1332
01:03:37,465 --> 01:03:40,294
And, um, we're gonna
get you started on step one.
1333
01:03:41,382 --> 01:03:42,339
Okay.
1334
01:03:43,601 --> 01:03:44,733
Okay.
1335
01:03:44,733 --> 01:03:48,519
Also, enough hiding out, man.
1336
01:03:48,519 --> 01:03:49,781
It's time you shared
with the group.
1337
01:03:51,871 --> 01:03:53,873
- All right.
- Uh...
1338
01:03:56,484 --> 01:04:02,533
[nervously] Hi, I'm Allison,
and I'm addicted to, uh,
1339
01:04:03,926 --> 01:04:05,449
pills.
1340
01:04:05,449 --> 01:04:07,625
[group] Hi, Allison.
1341
01:04:07,625 --> 01:04:08,757
[Allison] Uh...
1342
01:04:10,237 --> 01:04:12,413
Sorry. Can I start again?
1343
01:04:12,413 --> 01:04:14,632
I've never done this before,
and I'm nervous.
1344
01:04:14,632 --> 01:04:15,764
You got it.
1345
01:04:16,939 --> 01:04:18,593
[breathes deeply]
1346
01:04:20,421 --> 01:04:25,469
Hi, I'm Allison,
and I'm an addict.
1347
01:04:25,469 --> 01:04:27,341
[group] Hi, Allison.
1348
01:04:30,518 --> 01:04:31,693
I...
1349
01:04:33,956 --> 01:04:34,914
Um...
1350
01:04:38,091 --> 01:04:39,701
I was the driver
1351
01:04:41,137 --> 01:04:43,139
of a car
1352
01:04:43,139 --> 01:04:44,967
that was in
a really bad accident.
1353
01:04:48,231 --> 01:04:49,624
Two people died.
1354
01:04:53,236 --> 01:04:54,542
The woman was...
1355
01:04:58,285 --> 01:05:01,723
The woman was about to be
my sister-in-law.
1356
01:05:05,683 --> 01:05:08,295
We were on our way to try on
my wedding dresses.
1357
01:05:10,993 --> 01:05:12,647
[shudders]
1358
01:05:12,647 --> 01:05:13,778
And then we weren't.
1359
01:05:15,258 --> 01:05:16,520
It wasn't my fault. [sighs]
1360
01:05:18,174 --> 01:05:21,656
I wasn't on drugs or booze,
or drunk, or anything.
1361
01:05:23,745 --> 01:05:24,920
But, uh...
1362
01:05:35,322 --> 01:05:39,065
[voice breaking]
Surviving that day was, is...
1363
01:05:42,416 --> 01:05:44,331
the most painful thing
1364
01:05:44,331 --> 01:05:46,202
I will ever
have to live through.
1365
01:05:48,770 --> 01:05:51,077
[sniffles] I got hurt, too.
1366
01:05:52,078 --> 01:05:53,818
They put a hole in my head.
1367
01:05:54,863 --> 01:05:56,908
And, um, [sniffles]
1368
01:05:56,908 --> 01:05:58,562
that helped because
at least I had something
1369
01:05:58,562 --> 01:05:59,955
I could blame the pain on.
1370
01:06:02,697 --> 01:06:03,959
But then that healed...
1371
01:06:06,831 --> 01:06:08,268
and I was still hurting.
1372
01:06:10,226 --> 01:06:11,488
And I guess that's why
I didn't realize
1373
01:06:11,488 --> 01:06:13,534
how bad it was because to me...
1374
01:06:13,534 --> 01:06:15,884
[breathes shakily]
1375
01:06:15,884 --> 01:06:17,581
I was still in so much pain.
1376
01:06:17,581 --> 01:06:20,497
- [shuddering]
- [rubbing stomach]
1377
01:06:27,635 --> 01:06:30,899
I was, um, prescribed them
for physical pain,
1378
01:06:30,899 --> 01:06:33,032
and they really helped
with that. They really did.
1379
01:06:37,427 --> 01:06:39,951
But they made me numb.
Blissfully numb.
1380
01:06:45,522 --> 01:06:47,133
Without them I want to die.
1381
01:06:48,786 --> 01:06:50,397
[sniffles] Every day.
1382
01:06:54,140 --> 01:06:56,925
I've never said that
out loud before. [sobs]
1383
01:07:00,102 --> 01:07:01,060
Um...
1384
01:07:03,062 --> 01:07:05,847
I've never really faced
reality without them.
1385
01:07:06,630 --> 01:07:08,197
[sniffling]
1386
01:07:08,197 --> 01:07:10,417
And I don't know if I'll be
able to handle what I see,
1387
01:07:10,417 --> 01:07:13,768
but I'm here to try.
1388
01:07:18,555 --> 01:07:19,948
Okay. That's it. [sniffles]
1389
01:07:21,428 --> 01:07:23,734
That's it. [sighing heavily]
1390
01:07:27,477 --> 01:07:28,652
What happens now?
1391
01:07:30,089 --> 01:07:34,310
[breathing heavily]
1392
01:07:37,139 --> 01:07:39,837
[toy train horn tooting]
1393
01:07:44,973 --> 01:07:46,148
You made all of this?
1394
01:07:47,671 --> 01:07:51,371
Uh, I assembled it
and designed it.
1395
01:07:51,371 --> 01:07:53,112
Yeah.
1396
01:07:53,112 --> 01:07:57,028
You see,
the houses come as a kit.
1397
01:07:57,028 --> 01:07:59,988
You just assemble them
and paint them...
1398
01:07:59,988 --> 01:08:02,425
Schoolhouse,
I built from scratch.
1399
01:08:06,864 --> 01:08:10,259
Hey, there are two kids
making out back here.
1400
01:08:10,259 --> 01:08:11,869
- That's me.
- [chuckles]
1401
01:08:13,001 --> 01:08:14,872
- You were handsome.
- [laughs]
1402
01:08:15,308 --> 01:08:16,352
And tiny.
1403
01:08:17,875 --> 01:08:21,531
Yeah, my very first kiss
behind the schoolhouse.
1404
01:08:23,185 --> 01:08:24,665
Olivia Williams.
1405
01:08:26,536 --> 01:08:28,973
It was fall.
Tip of her nose was cold.
1406
01:08:28,973 --> 01:08:30,236
[chuckles]
1407
01:08:30,236 --> 01:08:32,194
Little runny.
1408
01:08:32,194 --> 01:08:35,458
She stood on tiptoe.
Tasted like bubble gum.
1409
01:08:36,677 --> 01:08:37,634
[Allison] Is that
who you married?
1410
01:08:37,634 --> 01:08:39,636
No! No, no.
1411
01:08:39,636 --> 01:08:43,466
No, she dumped me the next day
for Charlie Cook.
1412
01:08:43,466 --> 01:08:46,774
- Oh.
- He smoked Camels.
1413
01:08:46,774 --> 01:08:50,386
And drove
a Buick Riviera Roadmaster.
1414
01:08:50,386 --> 01:08:52,562
So, is this all inspired
by your life?
1415
01:08:53,346 --> 01:08:54,347
Kinda.
1416
01:08:55,565 --> 01:08:57,176
Supposed to be South Orange.
1417
01:08:58,525 --> 01:08:59,569
I grew up here.
1418
01:09:01,049 --> 01:09:02,659
I was a cop in Newark.
1419
01:09:03,704 --> 01:09:05,053
I've always lived here.
1420
01:09:07,229 --> 01:09:08,230
Who's the soldier?
1421
01:09:09,057 --> 01:09:10,450
[Daniel] That's me.
1422
01:09:10,450 --> 01:09:12,800
Day I got home from Vietnam.
1423
01:09:14,149 --> 01:09:16,630
That other little figure there
is my father.
1424
01:09:16,630 --> 01:09:20,024
He came down to the station
to pick me up.
1425
01:09:20,024 --> 01:09:21,983
- This is incredible.
- Mm.
1426
01:09:23,550 --> 01:09:25,291
How long did it take you?
1427
01:09:25,291 --> 01:09:27,293
Years.
1428
01:09:27,293 --> 01:09:29,469
I started
with a single figure-eight
1429
01:09:30,252 --> 01:09:32,123
and a two-car train.
1430
01:09:32,950 --> 01:09:34,561
I work on it when I can.
1431
01:09:35,605 --> 01:09:37,651
Got more time
now that I've retired.
1432
01:09:38,608 --> 01:09:40,480
My wife passed.
1433
01:09:40,480 --> 01:09:42,786
Ryan used to hang out with me
down here.
1434
01:09:44,092 --> 01:09:47,008
She liked the whistle
and the microphone.
1435
01:09:47,008 --> 01:09:48,357
There's a microphone?
1436
01:09:48,357 --> 01:09:49,793
Right over there.
1437
01:09:49,793 --> 01:09:51,404
How else you gonna tell
your passengers
1438
01:09:51,404 --> 01:09:53,101
- that the train's coming?
- [laughs]
1439
01:09:57,714 --> 01:09:59,586
[toy train horn tooting]
1440
01:09:59,586 --> 01:10:01,631
[chuckles]
1441
01:10:07,681 --> 01:10:09,248
[Allison singing "Take
The Last Train to Clarksville"]
1442
01:10:09,248 --> 01:10:12,686
♪ Take the last train
to Clarksville ♪
1443
01:10:12,686 --> 01:10:15,732
♪ And I'll meet you
at the station ♪
1444
01:10:15,732 --> 01:10:18,605
♪ You can be there by 4:30 ♪
1445
01:10:18,605 --> 01:10:20,694
♪ 'Cause I booked
your reservation ♪
1446
01:10:20,694 --> 01:10:22,522
♪ Don't be slow ♪
1447
01:10:22,522 --> 01:10:24,654
[both singing]
♪ Oh no no no ♪
1448
01:10:24,654 --> 01:10:27,048
♪ Oh no no no ♪
1449
01:10:27,048 --> 01:10:29,355
♪ And I don't know
if I'm ever ♪
1450
01:10:29,355 --> 01:10:31,052
[both sing]
♪ Coming home ♪
1451
01:10:31,052 --> 01:10:32,445
[Daniel laughs]
1452
01:10:32,445 --> 01:10:34,838
That was just a little
serenade for your people
1453
01:10:34,838 --> 01:10:36,405
from the heavens above.
1454
01:10:36,405 --> 01:10:39,626
Think that's one of the
reasons I enjoy it so much.
1455
01:10:39,626 --> 01:10:42,324
Why?
'Cause you get to play God?
1456
01:10:42,324 --> 01:10:45,936
Well, so much of my life
has been outta control.
1457
01:10:48,112 --> 01:10:50,289
Down here,
1458
01:10:50,289 --> 01:10:53,204
I get to decide
if Olivia chooses me.
1459
01:10:55,119 --> 01:10:57,165
I get to decide
if my father comes
1460
01:10:57,165 --> 01:10:59,472
to pick me up at the station
when I get home.
1461
01:11:00,603 --> 01:11:01,909
Did he?
1462
01:11:01,909 --> 01:11:02,997
No.
1463
01:11:05,260 --> 01:11:08,132
He was passed out drunk
in our backyard.
1464
01:11:10,831 --> 01:11:13,442
He'd lain face down so long,
1465
01:11:14,791 --> 01:11:17,359
an inch of snow had gathered
on his back.
1466
01:11:21,450 --> 01:11:24,018
Next morning at breakfast,
he offered me a beer,
1467
01:11:25,672 --> 01:11:26,716
so...
1468
01:11:28,414 --> 01:11:30,633
I had a beer with him
at breakfast,
1469
01:11:32,983 --> 01:11:34,333
and I never stopped.
1470
01:11:39,773 --> 01:11:41,601
When did you last talk
to Nathan?
1471
01:11:46,301 --> 01:11:48,259
Daniel, this is God.
1472
01:11:48,259 --> 01:11:51,480
Allison would like you to
change the conversation now.
1473
01:11:52,960 --> 01:11:54,918
- I'll bet she would.
- [chuckles]
1474
01:11:54,918 --> 01:11:57,356
All right.
Let's get outta here.
1475
01:11:58,269 --> 01:11:59,314
[switch clicks]
1476
01:12:03,187 --> 01:12:05,364
[music playing on headphones]
1477
01:12:08,932 --> 01:12:10,194
[Daniel] Ryan?
1478
01:12:10,194 --> 01:12:12,545
It's only one o'clock.
Why are you home?
1479
01:12:12,545 --> 01:12:15,025
We had a half-day
for the active shooter drill.
1480
01:12:15,025 --> 01:12:17,201
- I told you this morning.
- [Daniel sighs]
1481
01:12:17,201 --> 01:12:20,291
Well, this is a friend of mine
from the program.
1482
01:12:20,291 --> 01:12:21,205
Hi.
1483
01:12:22,468 --> 01:12:24,078
Hi.
1484
01:12:24,078 --> 01:12:25,993
- You should probably get going.
- Yeah. Yeah.
1485
01:12:25,993 --> 01:12:27,864
I'm gonna go.
1486
01:12:27,864 --> 01:12:30,258
Wait, I know you
from somewhere.
1487
01:12:30,258 --> 01:12:31,346
No, you don't.
1488
01:12:31,781 --> 01:12:32,739
You do?
1489
01:12:32,739 --> 01:12:33,696
How do I know you?
1490
01:12:34,349 --> 01:12:36,395
Uh... My... I'm...
1491
01:12:36,395 --> 01:12:37,831
I'm Allison.
1492
01:12:37,831 --> 01:12:39,485
Yeah, I've seen you before.
1493
01:12:39,485 --> 01:12:41,791
I thought you said the active
shooter drill ended at 2:00.
1494
01:12:41,791 --> 01:12:44,011
Yeah, that's when the pretend
shooter fights back.
1495
01:12:44,011 --> 01:12:46,013
Today, he shot himself,
so we got out early.
1496
01:12:47,623 --> 01:12:48,798
Why do I know you?
1497
01:12:48,798 --> 01:12:50,539
I'm not sure
what I'm supposed to say.
1498
01:12:50,539 --> 01:12:52,672
- You were Nathan's fiancee.
- No.
1499
01:12:52,672 --> 01:12:54,325
- You were in the car.
- No.
1500
01:12:54,325 --> 01:12:56,589
- I was, yeah.
- Weren't you driving?
1501
01:12:56,589 --> 01:12:57,590
Wasn't she driving?
1502
01:12:57,590 --> 01:12:59,069
We're in the program together.
1503
01:12:59,069 --> 01:13:01,202
- But I thought you said
it was her fault.
- What?
1504
01:13:01,202 --> 01:13:03,465
How could you bring her
into our house?
1505
01:13:03,465 --> 01:13:05,032
Get out of our fucking house!
1506
01:13:05,032 --> 01:13:06,947
- Okay. It's okay.
- [Daniel] I'm sorry. I...
1507
01:13:06,947 --> 01:13:09,645
I'm so sorry.
I thought you were in school.
1508
01:13:09,645 --> 01:13:11,081
You ruined my fucking life!
1509
01:13:11,081 --> 01:13:14,345
I know, I know, I know.
I'm... I'm really sorry.
1510
01:13:14,345 --> 01:13:17,653
[crying] You shouldn't
be here! This is our house!
1511
01:13:17,653 --> 01:13:18,915
My mom grew up in here!
1512
01:13:18,915 --> 01:13:21,135
I sleep in her bedroom.
I use her sheets!
1513
01:13:21,135 --> 01:13:23,180
[Daniel] All right. All right.
She's leaving.
1514
01:13:23,180 --> 01:13:25,400
Uh, just in case
this is the last time
1515
01:13:25,400 --> 01:13:27,489
I ever get to talk to you,
please know,
1516
01:13:29,230 --> 01:13:31,711
I also wish it was me.
1517
01:13:32,538 --> 01:13:33,800
Okay? I do.
1518
01:13:35,062 --> 01:13:36,367
I'm gonna go.
1519
01:13:36,367 --> 01:13:38,239
[voice breaking]
I never got to say goodbye.
1520
01:13:39,458 --> 01:13:42,156
[Allison sighs] I know.
1521
01:13:45,464 --> 01:13:48,728
They were going to see a play.
1522
01:13:54,385 --> 01:13:55,517
I know.
1523
01:13:57,171 --> 01:13:58,694
She wanted to see a musical,
1524
01:13:58,694 --> 01:14:00,957
because she loved
all the fancy costumes.
1525
01:14:06,093 --> 01:14:07,573
I didn't know that.
1526
01:14:07,573 --> 01:14:10,532
She said you made Nate
really happy.
1527
01:14:10,532 --> 01:14:12,491
That you were the best thing
that ever happened to him.
1528
01:14:13,840 --> 01:14:15,363
He made me happy, too.
1529
01:14:20,194 --> 01:14:22,283
[softly] Okay, I'm gonna go.
1530
01:14:23,240 --> 01:14:24,459
- [door opens]
- Allison.
1531
01:14:27,201 --> 01:14:28,202
Yeah.
1532
01:14:29,638 --> 01:14:31,074
Would you like to stay
for dinner?
1533
01:14:31,945 --> 01:14:33,207
What?
1534
01:14:34,948 --> 01:14:35,775
Uh...
1535
01:14:45,828 --> 01:14:49,179
So, you're an alcoholic, too?
1536
01:14:49,179 --> 01:14:50,529
[chidingly] Ryan.
1537
01:14:50,529 --> 01:14:51,617
Uh, no.
1538
01:14:53,053 --> 01:14:55,795
Alcohol's not exactly
my problem.
1539
01:14:55,795 --> 01:14:57,666
- What is? Meth?
- [Allison snorts]
1540
01:14:57,666 --> 01:14:58,972
Ryan.
1541
01:14:58,972 --> 01:15:02,149
No. Not meth. Um...
1542
01:15:05,239 --> 01:15:07,328
[smacks lips]
Prescription painkillers.
1543
01:15:08,068 --> 01:15:09,243
Oxy.
1544
01:15:09,243 --> 01:15:10,897
How do you know about Oxy?
1545
01:15:10,897 --> 01:15:12,594
Kids at my school snort it.
1546
01:15:12,594 --> 01:15:13,726
It's heroin!
1547
01:15:13,726 --> 01:15:15,075
No, it's not.
1548
01:15:15,075 --> 01:15:16,467
I could get it easier
than I could get a beer.
1549
01:15:16,467 --> 01:15:17,773
They sell it at Rite Aid.
1550
01:15:18,339 --> 01:15:19,558
[Daniel scoffs]
1551
01:15:19,558 --> 01:15:21,385
- So why'd you dump Uncle Nate?
- Ryan.
1552
01:15:21,385 --> 01:15:22,778
[Ryan] He said you ghosted him.
1553
01:15:22,778 --> 01:15:24,084
It's not your business.
1554
01:15:24,084 --> 01:15:26,956
I just don't understand how
1555
01:15:26,956 --> 01:15:28,741
if he was gonna stay with you,
1556
01:15:28,741 --> 01:15:30,830
even after
everything that happened,
1557
01:15:30,830 --> 01:15:31,831
why'd you dump him?
1558
01:15:33,180 --> 01:15:34,398
I was upset.
1559
01:15:38,446 --> 01:15:40,187
And so I ran.
1560
01:15:40,187 --> 01:15:41,884
- Like you, quitting soccer.
- [curtly] Shut up!
1561
01:15:41,884 --> 01:15:43,712
You don't say
"shut up" to me!
1562
01:15:43,712 --> 01:15:45,018
Ever again!
1563
01:15:47,934 --> 01:15:49,675
Why'd you quit soccer?
1564
01:15:49,675 --> 01:15:51,198
- She got into a fight.
- 'Cause I hate every girl
on the team.
1565
01:15:51,198 --> 01:15:52,242
Oh.
1566
01:15:53,940 --> 01:15:55,985
Your parents were telling me
how amazing you were.
1567
01:15:57,552 --> 01:15:59,336
- They were?
- [Allison] Mm-hmm.
1568
01:15:59,336 --> 01:16:01,295
Your dad actually was saying
1569
01:16:01,295 --> 01:16:03,166
how you were definitely
gonna get a scholarship.
1570
01:16:05,038 --> 01:16:06,605
I wanna go to Stanford.
1571
01:16:07,214 --> 01:16:08,955
[Daniel laughing]
1572
01:16:08,955 --> 01:16:10,478
Why are you laughing?
1573
01:16:12,567 --> 01:16:16,266
You quit the team,
you're mouthing off in school,
1574
01:16:16,266 --> 01:16:17,616
and you're not doing
your homework.
1575
01:16:17,616 --> 01:16:19,400
You're gonna get into Stanford?
1576
01:16:19,400 --> 01:16:21,054
I didn't say
I quit the team permanently.
1577
01:16:21,054 --> 01:16:23,012
I said I wanted
to take a break.
1578
01:16:23,012 --> 01:16:24,405
And I had a 4.0 down the shore.
1579
01:16:24,405 --> 01:16:26,537
I could get it back
in a second if I cared.
1580
01:16:26,537 --> 01:16:27,800
Why don't you care?
1581
01:16:27,800 --> 01:16:28,670
Why, do you think?
1582
01:16:30,498 --> 01:16:31,717
- [Daniel] Shit.
- [Allison] Okay.
1583
01:16:31,717 --> 01:16:32,979
Why don't we just
call it a night, okay?
1584
01:16:32,979 --> 01:16:34,284
[Allison] Yeah,
I'm gonna go home.
1585
01:16:39,246 --> 01:16:40,639
Hey, um...
1586
01:16:40,639 --> 01:16:41,814
[tears off page]
1587
01:16:44,077 --> 01:16:47,123
Um, just in case you,
I don't know,
1588
01:16:49,082 --> 01:16:50,518
wanna talk, need to talk...
1589
01:16:51,954 --> 01:16:53,042
This is me.
1590
01:16:53,042 --> 01:16:55,088
And it's up to you,
but I'm here.
1591
01:16:56,393 --> 01:16:57,525
Okay.
1592
01:16:58,134 --> 01:16:59,658
[receding footsteps]
1593
01:17:01,921 --> 01:17:03,662
[Daniel] I'm sorry
about all that.
1594
01:17:03,662 --> 01:17:04,880
[Allison] Uh, it's fine.
1595
01:17:06,708 --> 01:17:08,579
You see what I'm dealing with.
1596
01:17:08,579 --> 01:17:10,103
Honestly, it's okay.
1597
01:17:11,234 --> 01:17:12,453
Look. [sighs]
1598
01:17:13,584 --> 01:17:15,499
She's a very fragile kid.
1599
01:17:16,805 --> 01:17:21,027
So, I'd appreciate it
if you didn't contact her.
1600
01:17:22,942 --> 01:17:23,986
Oh.
1601
01:17:24,639 --> 01:17:25,640
Okay.
1602
01:17:27,163 --> 01:17:29,513
Yeah, I just...
1603
01:17:29,513 --> 01:17:32,734
[stuttering] I just wanted her
to know that I was available
1604
01:17:32,734 --> 01:17:35,215
if she wanted to talk
or anything.
1605
01:17:35,215 --> 01:17:37,347
I'm just asking if you will
1606
01:17:38,305 --> 01:17:39,785
please just let her be.
1607
01:17:40,655 --> 01:17:41,874
Scout's honor.
1608
01:17:41,874 --> 01:17:44,746
No, that's Spock's
"Live long and prosper."
1609
01:17:44,746 --> 01:17:46,400
We Boy Scouts do this.
1610
01:17:46,400 --> 01:17:48,532
Oh. I prefer Spock.
1611
01:17:49,446 --> 01:17:51,448
Live long and prosper, Daniel.
1612
01:17:51,448 --> 01:17:52,536
- [Daniel] Good night.
- Thank you.
1613
01:17:59,805 --> 01:18:02,416
[piano keyboard playing]
1614
01:18:08,465 --> 01:18:09,466
Mmm.
1615
01:18:13,514 --> 01:18:16,343
[humming]
1616
01:18:30,487 --> 01:18:33,012
[resumes playing keyboard]
1617
01:18:33,012 --> 01:18:36,537
[plays descending notes]
1618
01:18:36,537 --> 01:18:37,843
[keys clang]
1619
01:18:50,594 --> 01:18:51,726
[cell phone chimes]
1620
01:18:59,647 --> 01:19:01,475
[indistinct background chatter]
1621
01:19:22,670 --> 01:19:23,714
[chuckles]
1622
01:19:32,898 --> 01:19:34,073
[chuckling]
1623
01:19:42,603 --> 01:19:44,213
[crowd cheering and applauding]
1624
01:19:45,911 --> 01:19:47,956
Go, baby! Go, go, go!
1625
01:19:47,956 --> 01:19:49,349
[quietly] Come on,
come on, come on.
1626
01:19:49,349 --> 01:19:50,741
[woman] Come on!
Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!
1627
01:19:50,741 --> 01:19:52,569
- Yeah!
- [crowd cheers]
1628
01:19:52,569 --> 01:19:53,744
Attagirl!
1629
01:19:54,745 --> 01:19:56,225
Attagirl!
1630
01:19:57,748 --> 01:19:59,576
[cheering continues]
1631
01:20:00,708 --> 01:20:01,840
[mouthing] Thank you.
1632
01:20:06,366 --> 01:20:08,672
[somber music playing]
1633
01:20:14,113 --> 01:20:15,854
[bed creaking]
1634
01:20:15,854 --> 01:20:17,856
[heart beating]
1635
01:20:20,336 --> 01:20:21,860
[breathes heavily]
1636
01:20:24,514 --> 01:20:26,081
[fan creaking softly]
1637
01:20:30,694 --> 01:20:31,913
[cell phone chimes]
1638
01:20:43,969 --> 01:20:45,361
[Ryan] Why do you ride
your bike everywhere?
1639
01:20:45,971 --> 01:20:47,015
Um...
1640
01:20:48,495 --> 01:20:50,540
I haven't been in a car
since the accident.
1641
01:20:51,324 --> 01:20:52,891
'Cause you feel guilty?
1642
01:20:55,371 --> 01:20:56,503
Uh, no.
1643
01:20:57,199 --> 01:21:00,768
Because I feel... scared.
1644
01:21:00,768 --> 01:21:02,291
Daniel says
you were using your phone.
1645
01:21:04,598 --> 01:21:06,513
[Allison] Uh, I was using Maps.
1646
01:21:07,818 --> 01:21:08,907
Everyone uses Maps.
1647
01:21:08,907 --> 01:21:10,778
Yeah, well,
he has all the reports.
1648
01:21:10,778 --> 01:21:11,997
He's memorized them.
1649
01:21:13,215 --> 01:21:15,348
He stares at them at night.
It's weird.
1650
01:21:15,348 --> 01:21:18,351
Okay, well, I was there.
1651
01:21:18,351 --> 01:21:23,138
And the person who wrote
those reports wasn't, so...
1652
01:21:23,138 --> 01:21:25,575
[Ryan] Tell me
why you ended it with Nate.
1653
01:21:25,575 --> 01:21:27,447
My mom would want you guys
to be together still.
1654
01:21:28,665 --> 01:21:30,754
Ryan, I don't even know
what to say to that.
1655
01:21:31,755 --> 01:21:33,670
My mom used to really, um...
1656
01:21:35,934 --> 01:21:38,849
just, like, look out for him
and stuff, you know? Um...
1657
01:21:39,807 --> 01:21:40,851
And...
1658
01:21:42,244 --> 01:21:44,943
I've been thinking
maybe now I'm supposed to.
1659
01:21:45,813 --> 01:21:46,945
Because she can't.
1660
01:21:48,511 --> 01:21:50,992
I bet that would make her
really proud.
1661
01:21:50,992 --> 01:21:52,254
I could tell you
about what's happening
1662
01:21:52,254 --> 01:21:53,299
- with him if you want.
- No, that's okay.
1663
01:21:53,299 --> 01:21:54,648
Thank you, though.
1664
01:21:54,648 --> 01:21:56,041
I've tried really hard
to avoid all of that...
1665
01:21:56,041 --> 01:21:57,259
He moved to Tribeca.
1666
01:21:57,259 --> 01:21:58,260
Wow.
1667
01:21:59,348 --> 01:22:01,307
Yeah. He has a dog.
1668
01:22:01,307 --> 01:22:02,961
- A dog?
- Mm-hmm.
1669
01:22:02,961 --> 01:22:05,702
A French Bulldog named Jasper.
1670
01:22:05,702 --> 01:22:07,530
He never really struck me
as a Frenchie type,
1671
01:22:07,530 --> 01:22:09,358
but okay. [chuckles]
1672
01:22:09,358 --> 01:22:10,620
It's his girlfriend's.
1673
01:22:15,234 --> 01:22:16,235
Oh.
1674
01:22:17,366 --> 01:22:18,454
[Ryan softly] Yeah.
1675
01:22:19,934 --> 01:22:22,023
I... I don't need to hear this.
1676
01:22:23,242 --> 01:22:24,895
- Are you okay?
- Mm-hmm.
1677
01:22:26,854 --> 01:22:29,030
How long have they been
going out?
1678
01:22:29,030 --> 01:22:31,902
I don't know.
Like, four months, I think.
1679
01:22:32,686 --> 01:22:33,600
Wow.
1680
01:22:33,600 --> 01:22:36,951
Yeah. She's a paralegal.
1681
01:22:37,996 --> 01:22:39,171
I don't even know what that is.
1682
01:22:39,171 --> 01:22:40,911
Is that, like, a good thing?
1683
01:22:42,174 --> 01:22:44,089
[voice breaking] Yeah. Wow.
1684
01:22:44,089 --> 01:22:46,221
- You just keep saying, "Wow."
- Yeah.
1685
01:22:46,221 --> 01:22:47,657
It's just a lot to take in.
1686
01:22:49,442 --> 01:22:50,921
Um...
1687
01:22:50,921 --> 01:22:53,489
I'm really happy for him. I am.
1688
01:22:53,489 --> 01:22:55,100
He really deserves to be happy.
1689
01:22:55,970 --> 01:22:57,493
I...
1690
01:22:57,493 --> 01:22:59,539
- I shouldn't have told you.
- No, no, no. It's fine.
1691
01:22:59,539 --> 01:23:01,628
But you're upset.
1692
01:23:01,628 --> 01:23:03,673
We went through
so much together.
1693
01:23:05,849 --> 01:23:08,983
I really want good things
to happen to him.
1694
01:23:09,853 --> 01:23:11,203
I'm really sorry
1695
01:23:11,203 --> 01:23:12,465
- I made you upset.
- [Allison] It's okay.
1696
01:23:12,465 --> 01:23:13,640
- I'm gonna go to the bathroom.
- I really
1697
01:23:13,640 --> 01:23:15,033
meant for this to be friendly.
1698
01:23:15,033 --> 01:23:17,035
Yeah. I'll see you in a second.
1699
01:23:17,035 --> 01:23:19,689
[breathing heavily]
1700
01:23:22,127 --> 01:23:23,215
[door slams]
1701
01:23:27,828 --> 01:23:30,352
[brooding music playing]
1702
01:23:30,352 --> 01:23:32,224
[crying softly]
1703
01:23:39,709 --> 01:23:40,710
[phone camera clicking]
1704
01:23:42,147 --> 01:23:43,713
[sobbing]
1705
01:23:52,157 --> 01:23:54,159
[continues sobbing]
1706
01:24:00,034 --> 01:24:01,035
[sniffles]
1707
01:24:08,216 --> 01:24:09,696
Hey.
1708
01:24:09,696 --> 01:24:11,176
Is something wrong?
1709
01:24:11,176 --> 01:24:13,526
I, um... I forgot
I have a job interview.
1710
01:24:13,526 --> 01:24:16,224
So, I'm gonna go. [sniffles]
1711
01:24:16,224 --> 01:24:17,530
- You sick?
- [sniffles]
1712
01:24:18,139 --> 01:24:19,140
[voice breaks] Yeah.
1713
01:24:19,140 --> 01:24:21,490
- Withdrawal?
- I'm trying.
1714
01:24:21,490 --> 01:24:23,362
All right. Look, don't stop.
1715
01:24:24,276 --> 01:24:25,277
- Okay?
- Okay.
1716
01:24:26,887 --> 01:24:27,844
Don't use.
1717
01:24:29,585 --> 01:24:30,760
Okay.
1718
01:24:30,760 --> 01:24:32,153
Don't stay home tonight.
Do something.
1719
01:24:32,153 --> 01:24:34,112
- Okay. Okay.
- All right? Okay.
1720
01:24:35,330 --> 01:24:36,201
You need a hug?
1721
01:24:38,116 --> 01:24:39,117
[voice breaking]
Um, if I hug you,
1722
01:24:39,117 --> 01:24:40,901
I'm gonna sob, so no.
1723
01:24:40,901 --> 01:24:42,424
Well, I can handle that.
1724
01:24:42,424 --> 01:24:44,470
No, I shouldn't. Not in front
of Ryan. [sniffles]
1725
01:24:44,470 --> 01:24:45,993
Okay.
1726
01:24:45,993 --> 01:24:47,864
Well, I'm hugging you
with my eyes.
1727
01:24:48,300 --> 01:24:49,257
Thank you.
1728
01:24:50,519 --> 01:24:51,912
- Be careful.
- Okay.
1729
01:24:56,090 --> 01:24:58,832
[Allison] I have to go.
So, I'll see you another time.
1730
01:24:59,180 --> 01:25:00,007
Bye.
1731
01:25:02,488 --> 01:25:03,619
[whispers] Fuck me.
1732
01:25:04,054 --> 01:25:05,012
Hey.
1733
01:25:05,404 --> 01:25:06,492
Let's go.
1734
01:25:06,492 --> 01:25:08,015
This asshole
charged me six buck
1735
01:25:08,015 --> 01:25:09,059
for a cup of coffee. Come on.
1736
01:25:11,279 --> 01:25:14,021
Okay.
1737
01:25:14,021 --> 01:25:17,198
["A Love Song Seven Ways"
playing]
♪ It starts so early now ♪
1738
01:25:17,198 --> 01:25:20,941
♪ The sun has gone
to Birkenau ♪
1739
01:25:20,941 --> 01:25:24,553
♪ As shadows creep
across your brow ♪
1740
01:25:24,553 --> 01:25:26,816
♪ I love you just the same ♪
1741
01:25:28,340 --> 01:25:29,602
[breathing heavily] Fuck!
1742
01:25:29,602 --> 01:25:31,691
♪ These freakish holidays ♪
1743
01:25:31,691 --> 01:25:35,608
♪ That make us act
like renegades ♪
1744
01:25:35,608 --> 01:25:39,220
♪ A blood bath
at the Ice Capades ♪
1745
01:25:39,220 --> 01:25:41,483
♪ Just makes me love you ♪
1746
01:25:41,483 --> 01:25:47,315
♪ More than I should ever
have been allowed ♪
1747
01:25:47,315 --> 01:25:50,536
♪ In a world of candy guns ♪
1748
01:25:50,536 --> 01:25:56,063
♪ Sweet as demons
in the candy apple sun ♪
1749
01:25:56,063 --> 01:26:02,156
♪ Think it quiet but then
don't sing it loud ♪
1750
01:26:02,156 --> 01:26:05,290
♪ Through a world
of number ones ♪
1751
01:26:05,290 --> 01:26:08,075
♪ Pointed skyward at the... ♪
1752
01:26:08,075 --> 01:26:09,207
Look at me!
1753
01:26:09,207 --> 01:26:10,251
[glass shattering]
1754
01:26:11,818 --> 01:26:13,080
[plays chord]
1755
01:26:13,080 --> 01:26:15,561
♪ ...here like Buffalo ♪
1756
01:26:15,561 --> 01:26:18,955
♪ Now it feels like Bamako ♪
1757
01:26:18,955 --> 01:26:22,132
♪ I love you seven ways ♪
1758
01:26:23,612 --> 01:26:26,267
♪ You wear those baby tees ♪
1759
01:26:26,963 --> 01:26:28,313
[knocking on door]
1760
01:26:28,313 --> 01:26:30,010
[Diane] Allie!
1761
01:26:30,010 --> 01:26:32,534
- [knocking continues]
- [in sing-song voice] Allie!
1762
01:26:34,057 --> 01:26:35,102
Allie?
1763
01:26:35,102 --> 01:26:36,886
Did you job hunt today?
1764
01:26:41,021 --> 01:26:42,414
Please leave me alone.
1765
01:26:43,153 --> 01:26:45,504
I was looking on Etsy.
1766
01:26:45,504 --> 01:26:47,593
And I was thinking
it would be so cute
1767
01:26:47,593 --> 01:26:49,421
if we found, like,
a craft that we like.
1768
01:26:49,421 --> 01:26:51,640
And maybe we could
make a little money.
What do you think?
1769
01:26:53,033 --> 01:26:54,687
[groans]
1770
01:26:54,687 --> 01:26:56,123
[cell phone chimes
and vibrates]
1771
01:27:08,353 --> 01:27:09,745
[Diane] I was thinking
it'd be so cute
1772
01:27:09,745 --> 01:27:11,617
if it was like something fun
that we could sell.
1773
01:27:11,617 --> 01:27:15,534
Like little bibs for babies
that catch their food,
1774
01:27:15,534 --> 01:27:18,145
or salad dressing.
1775
01:27:18,145 --> 01:27:20,452
Or you know, just...
1776
01:27:20,452 --> 01:27:22,105
[gasps]
1777
01:27:22,105 --> 01:27:23,368
And you know what?
1778
01:27:23,368 --> 01:27:25,239
We could be on Shark Tank!
1779
01:27:25,239 --> 01:27:27,110
Can you imagine, Allie?
1780
01:27:27,110 --> 01:27:28,329
And I know you're like,
1781
01:27:28,329 --> 01:27:30,636
"Oh, shut up, Mom!
You're drunk again."
1782
01:27:30,636 --> 01:27:31,767
But listen...
1783
01:27:42,474 --> 01:27:44,476
[Diane] Ooh, I just thought
of the best idea!
1784
01:27:44,476 --> 01:27:47,479
We could do, um, papier-mache!
1785
01:27:48,306 --> 01:27:49,872
Papier-mache!
1786
01:27:49,872 --> 01:27:51,570
So it would be like,
1787
01:27:51,570 --> 01:27:53,354
do a little dance,
a little song.
1788
01:27:53,354 --> 01:27:55,487
"Hey, Sharks! You know how
everybody likes papier-mache."
1789
01:27:55,487 --> 01:27:58,925
I would be like,
"Hey, Sharks! Hey, Sharks!"
1790
01:27:58,925 --> 01:28:01,406
Hey, Sharks! Oh... Sharks!"
1791
01:28:01,406 --> 01:28:03,843
Wait, that's too hard.
We'll be like,
1792
01:28:03,843 --> 01:28:07,629
"I'm Diane.
This is my associate, Allison.
1793
01:28:07,629 --> 01:28:12,765
"And this is our... whatever!"
You know...
1794
01:28:13,940 --> 01:28:15,768
[softly] You weak piece
of fucking shit.
1795
01:28:15,768 --> 01:28:17,813
You couldn't make it go
two days.
1796
01:28:19,075 --> 01:28:20,555
I fucking hate you.
1797
01:28:21,382 --> 01:28:24,820
I hate you so much.
1798
01:28:24,820 --> 01:28:27,606
Allie, do you remember
when you were in fourth grade,
1799
01:28:27,606 --> 01:28:30,086
you made
that giant mitochondria?
1800
01:28:30,086 --> 01:28:35,048
That's something that
would sell, I promise you.
1801
01:28:35,048 --> 01:28:37,659
We could be like,
"Hey, Sharks!"
1802
01:28:37,659 --> 01:28:40,183
We got them for you!
Papier-mache!"
1803
01:28:40,183 --> 01:28:43,839
You know, like all the...
1804
01:28:43,839 --> 01:28:46,668
[Diane's voice becomes muffled
and indistinct]
1805
01:28:51,238 --> 01:28:53,980
I knew you would like
that idea! I knew it!
1806
01:28:54,763 --> 01:28:56,765
[breathing heavily]
1807
01:28:57,853 --> 01:28:59,551
[pills rattling]
1808
01:29:06,384 --> 01:29:07,689
[bottle cap opening]
1809
01:29:12,868 --> 01:29:15,393
[shuddering]
1810
01:29:25,881 --> 01:29:27,927
[breathing heavily]
1811
01:29:33,889 --> 01:29:35,369
[gasps]
1812
01:29:37,153 --> 01:29:38,981
- [panting]
- [faucet running]
1813
01:29:55,084 --> 01:29:56,608
[sniffles]
1814
01:29:57,478 --> 01:29:59,437
[continues panting]
1815
01:30:07,749 --> 01:30:09,795
[train horn toots]
1816
01:30:21,459 --> 01:30:22,460
Yes!
1817
01:30:22,460 --> 01:30:23,591
[laughs]
1818
01:30:24,462 --> 01:30:25,985
You're on the wrong side.
1819
01:30:26,768 --> 01:30:28,640
What? No, I'm not.
1820
01:30:31,773 --> 01:30:33,340
Oh.
1821
01:30:33,340 --> 01:30:34,863
Well, good thing you came!
1822
01:30:34,863 --> 01:30:36,038
Oh, my God!
1823
01:30:36,561 --> 01:30:37,910
Get over here.
1824
01:30:37,910 --> 01:30:39,477
Whoo! Party!
1825
01:30:39,477 --> 01:30:41,261
[train whooshes by]
1826
01:30:48,486 --> 01:30:49,530
[knocking on door]
1827
01:30:58,234 --> 01:30:59,975
- Hello, Diane!
- Oh, hey!
1828
01:30:59,975 --> 01:31:02,021
I don't know
1829
01:31:02,021 --> 01:31:04,327
how much Allison has told you.
1830
01:31:05,590 --> 01:31:07,548
But we've been going
to the same program.
1831
01:31:07,548 --> 01:31:09,637
Oh, yeah, she said.
She told me, yeah.
1832
01:31:10,551 --> 01:31:11,813
My granddaughter, Ryan,
1833
01:31:11,813 --> 01:31:14,816
has taken an interest
in Allison and,
1834
01:31:14,816 --> 01:31:16,514
well, now I can't find her.
1835
01:31:16,514 --> 01:31:19,429
So I just thought I'd drop by
and see if she might be here.
1836
01:31:20,692 --> 01:31:22,171
I tried texting them,
1837
01:31:22,171 --> 01:31:25,523
but, you know,
they all go green.
1838
01:31:25,523 --> 01:31:26,524
Do you know what that means?
1839
01:31:26,524 --> 01:31:27,786
I have no idea.
1840
01:31:27,786 --> 01:31:30,005
I hate when that happens,
when they go...
1841
01:31:30,005 --> 01:31:31,441
It's all green
1842
01:31:31,441 --> 01:31:33,008
and you don't know
if it's sent. It's so weird.
1843
01:31:33,008 --> 01:31:34,793
- [Daniel] Right. Right. Right.
- Drives me crazy.
1844
01:31:34,793 --> 01:31:36,534
You'll have to let me know
if you figure that out.
1845
01:31:36,534 --> 01:31:38,536
[both chuckle]
1846
01:31:38,536 --> 01:31:40,189
I'm not tech-y.
1847
01:31:40,189 --> 01:31:43,628
But I actually tonight was
trying to find Allison myself.
1848
01:31:43,628 --> 01:31:45,717
But do you really think
they're together tonight?
1849
01:31:47,545 --> 01:31:49,416
Both missing
at the same time. It...
1850
01:31:50,635 --> 01:31:52,245
seems a little curious.
1851
01:31:52,245 --> 01:31:54,552
[sighs] Seems like
no matter how old they get,
1852
01:31:54,552 --> 01:31:56,858
- you never stop worrying.
- Yeah.
1853
01:31:56,858 --> 01:31:58,294
But they always seem
to turn up.
1854
01:31:59,774 --> 01:32:00,993
Not always.
1855
01:32:02,864 --> 01:32:04,344
Yeah.
1856
01:32:04,344 --> 01:32:07,129
Well, can you let me know
if you find them?
1857
01:32:07,129 --> 01:32:08,653
- I will.
- Great.
1858
01:32:10,655 --> 01:32:11,569
Thank you.
1859
01:32:12,439 --> 01:32:13,875
What's that?
1860
01:32:13,875 --> 01:32:15,050
Oh, I was just... I...
1861
01:32:15,050 --> 01:32:17,226
I was just saying
thank you so much
1862
01:32:17,226 --> 01:32:19,533
for being so kind to Allison.
1863
01:32:19,533 --> 01:32:22,841
She said you've always been
so warm to her and you know,
1864
01:32:22,841 --> 01:32:26,192
I... just wanted to say thanks,
'cause, you know,
1865
01:32:26,192 --> 01:32:29,891
like, some people
wouldn't be like that, so...
1866
01:32:29,891 --> 01:32:33,634
Well, we're all just trying
to move on, I suppose.
1867
01:32:33,634 --> 01:32:34,940
Yeah.
1868
01:32:34,940 --> 01:32:36,071
I don't think
Allie and I are doing
1869
01:32:36,071 --> 01:32:37,856
a very good job of that, Daniel.
1870
01:32:39,248 --> 01:32:40,598
You know what they say.
1871
01:32:40,598 --> 01:32:42,382
[Diane] What?
1872
01:32:42,382 --> 01:32:45,124
"Comparison
is the thief of joy."
1873
01:32:45,124 --> 01:32:47,474
Oh. I didn't know
they said that.
1874
01:32:48,910 --> 01:32:49,955
Well...
1875
01:32:51,130 --> 01:32:52,435
somebody did.
1876
01:32:52,435 --> 01:32:54,394
[laughs] Yeah.
1877
01:32:55,874 --> 01:32:57,484
Well, I best be going then.
1878
01:32:57,484 --> 01:32:58,920
Oh, yeah, of course.
1879
01:32:58,920 --> 01:33:00,313
- [Daniel] Night.
- Good night.
1880
01:33:06,841 --> 01:33:08,974
[downtempo music playing]
1881
01:33:14,501 --> 01:33:16,895
[singing "Stardust"]
♪ Stare into space ♪
1882
01:33:18,418 --> 01:33:20,159
♪ Out in the blue ♪
1883
01:33:20,159 --> 01:33:21,595
Oh, my God, there he is!
1884
01:33:21,595 --> 01:33:23,336
Look at him! Isn't he so hot?
1885
01:33:25,077 --> 01:33:26,905
Is that a face tattoo?
1886
01:33:26,905 --> 01:33:29,037
- Yeah!
- Oh, my God!
1887
01:33:29,995 --> 01:33:32,258
[sighs] I love this song!
1888
01:33:32,258 --> 01:33:33,694
Quinn sent it to me
in a playlist.
1889
01:33:33,694 --> 01:33:36,131
He, like, knows so much
about music.
1890
01:33:38,177 --> 01:33:39,265
Thank you.
1891
01:33:40,396 --> 01:33:41,659
For getting me to come.
1892
01:33:42,529 --> 01:33:43,617
Yeah.
1893
01:33:44,792 --> 01:33:48,100
[singer]
♪ You're the only thing ♪
1894
01:33:48,100 --> 01:33:49,623
That's the guitarist, Thomas.
1895
01:33:49,623 --> 01:33:52,539
He's staring right at you!
1896
01:33:52,539 --> 01:33:54,889
[Allison] Oh, stop.
No, I'm okay. I'm fine.
1897
01:33:54,889 --> 01:33:56,195
I know, you can do
so much better.
1898
01:33:56,195 --> 01:33:57,892
- [Allison] What? No.
- But he is fucking hot.
1899
01:33:57,892 --> 01:33:59,851
[both laugh]
1900
01:33:59,851 --> 01:34:03,942
Uh... Okay, I, um...
I gotta go get someone in.
1901
01:34:03,942 --> 01:34:04,899
But I'll be right back.
1902
01:34:04,899 --> 01:34:06,248
- Should I come with you?
- No.
1903
01:34:06,248 --> 01:34:07,946
- Are you sure?
- No, I'll be right back. Yeah.
1904
01:34:07,946 --> 01:34:10,078
[singer]
♪ Take a photo ♪
1905
01:34:11,601 --> 01:34:13,691
♪ Make it real ♪
1906
01:34:15,736 --> 01:34:17,695
♪ You're the stardust ♪
1907
01:34:23,701 --> 01:34:27,052
♪ Stardust ♪
1908
01:34:27,052 --> 01:34:30,185
♪ Lighting the fields ♪
1909
01:34:31,926 --> 01:34:34,320
♪ Caught in a state ♪
1910
01:34:35,800 --> 01:34:38,367
♪ Watching it fall ♪
1911
01:34:39,499 --> 01:34:42,067
♪ Aquarius bloom ♪
1912
01:34:43,503 --> 01:34:45,984
♪ Just bought a car ♪
1913
01:34:51,990 --> 01:34:53,513
Surprise!
1914
01:34:55,384 --> 01:34:56,734
Nathan?
1915
01:34:57,865 --> 01:34:59,345
- Hi!
- [Allison] Hi!
1916
01:35:00,563 --> 01:35:01,869
Ryan?
1917
01:35:01,869 --> 01:35:03,610
- What?
- Hi!
1918
01:35:04,785 --> 01:35:06,787
Uh, sorry.
1919
01:35:06,787 --> 01:35:09,964
Allie, uh,
this is my girlfriend, Joelle.
1920
01:35:11,052 --> 01:35:13,141
[voice cracking]
Hi. I'm sorry. Um...
1921
01:35:13,881 --> 01:35:14,969
Nice to meet you.
1922
01:35:14,969 --> 01:35:16,536
I've heard so much about you.
1923
01:35:17,406 --> 01:35:18,451
Oh.
1924
01:35:19,713 --> 01:35:20,714
Okay.
1925
01:35:20,714 --> 01:35:22,150
I think we're the victims
1926
01:35:22,150 --> 01:35:24,631
of a teenage girl's
good intentions.
1927
01:35:24,631 --> 01:35:26,372
- [Allison] What?
- I said...
1928
01:35:26,372 --> 01:35:28,896
I said I think
she meant well. Ryan.
1929
01:35:31,507 --> 01:35:33,335
[voice breaking]
I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go.
1930
01:35:33,335 --> 01:35:34,467
- [Nathan] Are you good?
- I'm fine.
1931
01:35:34,467 --> 01:35:35,773
I'm fine. I'm gonna go.
1932
01:35:35,773 --> 01:35:36,904
Allie!
1933
01:35:40,516 --> 01:35:42,040
Ryan.
1934
01:35:42,040 --> 01:35:43,955
What the fuck
did you just do that for?
1935
01:35:45,173 --> 01:35:47,262
No offense, but you weren't
supposed to come.
1936
01:35:47,262 --> 01:35:49,395
I know being a paralegal
is a good job,
1937
01:35:49,395 --> 01:35:50,962
but he's supposed
to be with Allie.
1938
01:35:50,962 --> 01:35:53,399
- I'm sorry.
- [Nathan] Ryan?
1939
01:35:53,399 --> 01:35:55,009
What the fuck did you just do?
1940
01:35:55,923 --> 01:35:57,446
I'm fixing it.
1941
01:35:57,446 --> 01:35:59,100
For Mom.
1942
01:35:59,100 --> 01:36:01,494
Go find her
and then I'm taking you home.
1943
01:36:02,669 --> 01:36:03,626
[Ryan scoffs]
1944
01:36:05,106 --> 01:36:06,499
I am so sorry.
1945
01:36:07,152 --> 01:36:08,980
Serious... This...
1946
01:36:08,980 --> 01:36:10,372
- It's fine. It's okay.
- Yeah?
1947
01:36:10,372 --> 01:36:11,634
- Yeah. Yeah.
- You good?
1948
01:36:11,634 --> 01:36:12,984
I'm fine. I need a drink.
1949
01:36:12,984 --> 01:36:14,159
- But I'm fine.
- Yes.
1950
01:36:14,159 --> 01:36:15,421
Oh, fuck!
1951
01:36:20,252 --> 01:36:21,514
[singer] You guys
have been great,
1952
01:36:21,514 --> 01:36:22,689
- thank you so much!
- [cheers and applause]
1953
01:36:22,689 --> 01:36:24,082
Allie!
1954
01:36:24,082 --> 01:36:26,475
Why the fuck
did you just do that?
1955
01:36:26,475 --> 01:36:28,521
I thought it was gonna
make you happy.
1956
01:36:28,521 --> 01:36:31,567
You thought
that would make me happy?
1957
01:36:31,567 --> 01:36:33,308
- [Ryan] Yeah!
- Are you insane?
1958
01:36:33,308 --> 01:36:35,484
Hi! Can I please get, um...
Hey, I'm sorry.
1959
01:36:35,484 --> 01:36:38,183
Could I just get a glass
of tequila, please?
1960
01:36:38,183 --> 01:36:39,488
Fuck, I can't breathe.
1961
01:36:39,488 --> 01:36:40,794
- Ryan, I can't fucking breathe!
- Calm down.
1962
01:36:40,794 --> 01:36:42,622
Calm down, okay? I'm sorry.
1963
01:36:42,622 --> 01:36:44,754
You fucking did that
on purpose!
1964
01:36:44,754 --> 01:36:46,060
You did that to hurt me, right?
1965
01:36:46,060 --> 01:36:47,888
Is that what you did?
Yeah, you did.
1966
01:36:47,888 --> 01:36:49,368
- Just admit it. Yes, you did!
- No, I didn't!
1967
01:36:49,368 --> 01:36:50,935
- You did that
on fucking purpose!
- No, I didn't!
1968
01:36:50,935 --> 01:36:53,894
You killed, baby! You killed!
1969
01:36:53,894 --> 01:36:56,331
- That was incredible, man!
- [Ryan] Hi! Hi!
1970
01:36:56,331 --> 01:36:58,594
I'm Quinn's friend, Ryan.
1971
01:36:58,594 --> 01:37:00,466
You guys sounded so good!
1972
01:37:00,466 --> 01:37:02,294
You're gonna be so famous!
1973
01:37:02,294 --> 01:37:04,992
I know. I really have to savor
my anonymity.
1974
01:37:04,992 --> 01:37:08,735
Hey, we're gonna go to this
party over in Williamsburg.
1975
01:37:08,735 --> 01:37:10,258
You guys wanna come?
1976
01:37:11,869 --> 01:37:13,653
[sighs] Fuck, yeah, whatever.
Let's go!
1977
01:37:13,653 --> 01:37:14,828
I need to get outta here.
1978
01:37:15,611 --> 01:37:17,483
[whooping]
1979
01:37:21,095 --> 01:37:22,880
Do you have the time?
1980
01:37:22,880 --> 01:37:24,751
- [cell phone chiming]
- Yeah.
1981
01:37:28,363 --> 01:37:30,496
Hey, Danny. Everything okay?
1982
01:37:30,496 --> 01:37:34,239
I can't find Ryan.
I've tried everything.
1983
01:37:34,239 --> 01:37:38,199
Anyway, my mind
can't help but wonder if...
1984
01:37:38,199 --> 01:37:40,462
Well, if you've seen Allison
or not.
1985
01:37:40,462 --> 01:37:43,726
Uh, no, I haven't, but I can
text her if you want.
1986
01:37:43,726 --> 01:37:45,119
Well, I've tried texting
both of them,
1987
01:37:45,119 --> 01:37:46,512
but neither one is answering.
1988
01:37:46,512 --> 01:37:47,730
What's wrong?
1989
01:37:47,730 --> 01:37:49,167
Daniel can't find
his granddaughter.
1990
01:37:49,167 --> 01:37:51,560
Um, well, if he pays for
the phone, he can just log
1991
01:37:51,560 --> 01:37:53,171
into the account,
and use Find My Phone.
1992
01:37:53,171 --> 01:37:55,608
Yeah. Daniel, do you know
what Find My Phone is?
1993
01:37:55,608 --> 01:37:57,088
No, what the hell is that?
1994
01:37:57,088 --> 01:37:58,916
[hip-hop music playing
on speaker]
1995
01:37:58,916 --> 01:38:01,179
[Ryan] This is amazing!
1996
01:38:01,962 --> 01:38:05,748
Whoa!
1997
01:38:05,748 --> 01:38:07,272
[indistinct chatter]
1998
01:38:20,807 --> 01:38:21,982
[cell phone chiming]
1999
01:38:28,162 --> 01:38:29,163
Fuck!
2000
01:38:30,643 --> 01:38:34,168
Allie, this is Jarvis. He has
the stuff you asked for.
2001
01:38:34,168 --> 01:38:35,430
Hey!
2002
01:38:35,430 --> 01:38:37,171
I don't have any thirties,
just dope.
2003
01:38:37,171 --> 01:38:40,174
Uh, yeah, okay.
Yeah, whatever you have.
2004
01:38:42,002 --> 01:38:43,699
Can you spot me?
2005
01:38:43,699 --> 01:38:45,788
- I'll pay you back, I promise.
- Uh, okay, all right.
2006
01:38:52,621 --> 01:38:53,622
Thanks.
2007
01:38:59,367 --> 01:39:00,455
[snorts]
2008
01:39:01,717 --> 01:39:03,284
It's coming. Look like!
2009
01:39:06,635 --> 01:39:07,593
Yeah, here it is.
2010
01:39:07,593 --> 01:39:08,768
Okay, what does it say?
2011
01:39:12,293 --> 01:39:14,469
[muffled music playing]
2012
01:39:14,469 --> 01:39:16,732
[Ryan grunts]
2013
01:39:16,732 --> 01:39:19,431
- [cell phone ringing]
- The whole room is spinning.
2014
01:39:21,389 --> 01:39:22,912
Oh, that's my phone.
2015
01:39:24,175 --> 01:39:25,437
Don't worry about it.
2016
01:39:27,308 --> 01:39:30,007
Can we just stop for a second?
2017
01:39:30,007 --> 01:39:31,399
Where is my phone?
2018
01:39:31,399 --> 01:39:33,488
[cell phone continues ringing]
2019
01:39:33,488 --> 01:39:35,099
I think I'm gonna throw up.
2020
01:39:38,058 --> 01:39:39,320
What the fuck!
2021
01:39:40,669 --> 01:39:42,932
She's in the fucking city!
2022
01:39:42,932 --> 01:39:45,152
She's in fucking Williamsburg!
2023
01:39:45,152 --> 01:39:47,241
Okay, Daniel, wait.
I'm gonna come pick you up.
2024
01:39:47,241 --> 01:39:49,200
I don't want you to do
something you're gonna regret.
2025
01:39:49,200 --> 01:39:50,897
I'm gonna kill
that motherfucker.
2026
01:39:50,897 --> 01:39:52,725
Yeah, that's exactly what I'm
worried about. I'm on my way.
2027
01:40:06,434 --> 01:40:09,002
- [Allison grunts]
- Okay. Easy does it.
2028
01:40:09,002 --> 01:40:11,004
- You're wasted.
- No, I'm not.
2029
01:40:11,004 --> 01:40:13,441
[hip-hop music playing
on speaker]
2030
01:40:13,441 --> 01:40:14,529
Ryan?
2031
01:40:16,401 --> 01:40:19,056
[breathing heavily]
2032
01:40:39,206 --> 01:40:40,425
Ryan?
2033
01:40:44,646 --> 01:40:46,387
- Ryan, are you in there?
- [knocking on door]
2034
01:40:46,387 --> 01:40:48,737
[Quinn] She's fine.
Go the fuck away!
2035
01:40:48,737 --> 01:40:49,912
[Allison] Ryan?
2036
01:40:49,912 --> 01:40:52,089
[techno music playing
on speaker]
2037
01:40:57,268 --> 01:40:58,312
[knocking on door]
2038
01:40:58,312 --> 01:40:59,400
[Allison] Ryan?
2039
01:41:00,880 --> 01:41:03,100
Can you just
open the door, please?
2040
01:41:05,406 --> 01:41:06,407
Ryan.
2041
01:41:06,407 --> 01:41:07,626
[Quinn] Go away!
2042
01:41:07,626 --> 01:41:09,845
[Daniel] Allison? Where's Ryan?
2043
01:41:09,845 --> 01:41:11,325
What're you doing here?
2044
01:41:11,325 --> 01:41:13,588
Where the fuck is Ryan?
2045
01:41:13,588 --> 01:41:15,895
She's in here. I'm trying to...
She won't answer.
2046
01:41:15,895 --> 01:41:16,983
- [knocking on door]
- Ryan!
2047
01:41:17,940 --> 01:41:18,985
[Daniel] Ryan?
2048
01:41:20,421 --> 01:41:22,119
It's your grandpa,
open the door.
2049
01:41:23,337 --> 01:41:24,817
Open the door, baby.
2050
01:41:24,817 --> 01:41:26,123
[Quinn] Fuck off!
2051
01:41:27,124 --> 01:41:28,255
[kicks door]
2052
01:41:28,255 --> 01:41:30,301
- What the fuck!
- [Allison] Ryan!
2053
01:41:30,301 --> 01:41:32,955
[Daniel] You again!
Get the fuck up!
2054
01:41:32,955 --> 01:41:34,131
- Danny, no, no, no.
- Oh, my God!
2055
01:41:34,131 --> 01:41:35,697
- Don't do that!
- Nothing happened.
2056
01:41:35,697 --> 01:41:38,265
Tell me why I shouldn't
kill you, motherfucker?
2057
01:41:38,265 --> 01:41:39,701
We were just making out.
2058
01:41:39,701 --> 01:41:40,920
You hurt my baby.
2059
01:41:43,575 --> 01:41:45,272
- Now, I'm gonna hurt you.
- [gun cocks]
2060
01:41:45,272 --> 01:41:46,708
- No, no, no, no, no.
- [Simone] Danny!
2061
01:41:47,666 --> 01:41:48,580
Dad!
2062
01:41:49,102 --> 01:41:50,973
No!
2063
01:41:50,973 --> 01:41:53,498
The hell you're doing here?
This is family business.
2064
01:41:53,498 --> 01:41:55,152
Don't do this.
2065
01:41:55,152 --> 01:41:57,154
Go on back
to your new life, Nate.
2066
01:41:57,154 --> 01:41:58,807
[Quinn] Put the gun down, please.
2067
01:41:58,807 --> 01:42:00,157
[sobbing] Please, please!
2068
01:42:00,157 --> 01:42:01,549
He's not worth it.
2069
01:42:01,549 --> 01:42:03,812
I got nothing left to lose.
2070
01:42:03,812 --> 01:42:05,118
You got me!
2071
01:42:06,467 --> 01:42:07,555
You got Ryan!
2072
01:42:08,339 --> 01:42:09,731
We need you!
2073
01:42:09,731 --> 01:42:11,994
You do this, it's over!
2074
01:42:14,388 --> 01:42:15,998
We get no more time.
2075
01:42:15,998 --> 01:42:18,131
[Simone] Danny,
put the gun down.
2076
01:42:20,307 --> 01:42:21,308
Please.
2077
01:42:26,095 --> 01:42:27,184
[sighs]
2078
01:42:28,620 --> 01:42:29,621
[Quinn] Oh, my...
2079
01:42:31,231 --> 01:42:32,276
That's my niece.
2080
01:42:32,972 --> 01:42:34,408
She's 16 years old.
2081
01:42:34,756 --> 01:42:36,367
[groans]
2082
01:42:36,367 --> 01:42:37,759
[Simone] Oh, my God! All right,
we gotta get out of here.
2083
01:42:37,759 --> 01:42:38,891
Hey, Ryan, baby?
2084
01:42:38,891 --> 01:42:40,458
- Please get up.
- My fucking nose!
2085
01:42:40,458 --> 01:42:43,461
- [Daniel] Get over here!
- [Quinn] My fucking nose!
2086
01:42:43,461 --> 01:42:45,898
[techno music playing
on speaker]
2087
01:42:50,772 --> 01:42:51,773
[door creaks]
2088
01:42:53,166 --> 01:42:55,124
[Allison breathing heavily]
2089
01:42:56,691 --> 01:42:58,215
The fuck is the matter
with you?
2090
01:42:58,215 --> 01:42:59,651
I was trying to protect her!
2091
01:42:59,651 --> 01:43:01,043
- [Daniel] Protect her?
- Yeah!
2092
01:43:01,043 --> 01:43:03,307
I told you to stay away
from her!
2093
01:43:03,307 --> 01:43:04,569
Who the fuck are you
2094
01:43:04,569 --> 01:43:06,092
to be talking
about protecting somebody?
2095
01:43:06,092 --> 01:43:07,702
- You're a mess.
- Dad!
2096
01:43:07,702 --> 01:43:10,139
I was... I was trying to help.
2097
01:43:10,139 --> 01:43:11,663
I was... I was trying to...
2098
01:43:12,490 --> 01:43:13,926
I was trying to make it right.
2099
01:43:13,926 --> 01:43:15,319
Let me tell you something.
2100
01:43:16,015 --> 01:43:17,669
You will never ever
2101
01:43:17,669 --> 01:43:19,801
be able to fix the things
you've done to me.
2102
01:43:20,976 --> 01:43:22,064
You hear me?
2103
01:43:22,848 --> 01:43:24,502
I want my life back.
2104
01:43:24,502 --> 01:43:25,764
I want my child back.
2105
01:43:26,895 --> 01:43:29,507
My baby, my... Molly.
2106
01:43:30,856 --> 01:43:32,379
You took my baby away from me!
2107
01:43:32,379 --> 01:43:33,728
Dad! Enough.
2108
01:43:33,728 --> 01:43:35,034
Nah, it's okay.
2109
01:43:36,775 --> 01:43:37,776
Say it.
2110
01:43:39,212 --> 01:43:40,648
Shit, I wanted to hate you.
2111
01:43:42,041 --> 01:43:43,260
But I stopped myself.
2112
01:43:45,914 --> 01:43:49,178
And when you walked into
that meeting, I thought...
2113
01:43:50,179 --> 01:43:52,486
This is God testing me.
2114
01:43:52,486 --> 01:43:56,882
This is proof of a higher power
2115
01:43:56,882 --> 01:43:59,101
testing me in this church.
2116
01:44:00,799 --> 01:44:02,191
Trying to see
if he could break me.
2117
01:44:03,280 --> 01:44:04,411
But I'll show him.
2118
01:44:07,109 --> 01:44:08,285
I'm unbreakable.
2119
01:44:09,808 --> 01:44:11,636
I will offer my hand
2120
01:44:12,332 --> 01:44:13,942
to this sorry
2121
01:44:14,769 --> 01:44:18,686
little fucking pill-junkie.
2122
01:44:18,686 --> 01:44:21,863
All I asked you to do
was stay away from this child.
2123
01:44:23,343 --> 01:44:24,388
Now look at her.
2124
01:44:25,737 --> 01:44:26,999
She got no mother.
2125
01:44:29,175 --> 01:44:30,176
No father.
2126
01:44:32,265 --> 01:44:34,223
And how many years
can I have left?
2127
01:44:36,574 --> 01:44:38,924
What a fucking waste you are.
2128
01:44:39,272 --> 01:44:40,186
Dad!
2129
01:44:40,186 --> 01:44:43,232
What a fucking waste of a soul.
2130
01:44:45,322 --> 01:44:46,584
Of a chance.
2131
01:44:46,584 --> 01:44:48,934
Danny, enough.
You've said your piece.
2132
01:44:48,934 --> 01:44:50,849
This isn't
how it was supposed to be.
2133
01:44:52,894 --> 01:44:54,069
I'm a good person.
2134
01:44:56,028 --> 01:44:58,204
I never said
God has to be fair.
2135
01:44:58,987 --> 01:45:00,119
I just never thought
2136
01:45:01,729 --> 01:45:03,035
he could be this cruel.
2137
01:45:06,647 --> 01:45:07,953
Taxi!
2138
01:45:07,953 --> 01:45:09,389
[Simone] Hold on, Danny,
let me take you home.
2139
01:45:09,389 --> 01:45:10,477
[Daniel] No.
2140
01:45:10,477 --> 01:45:13,480
I'll go with him.
Hey! Hey, Ryan!
2141
01:45:13,480 --> 01:45:15,917
Come on, wake up.
We're taking you home.
2142
01:45:17,441 --> 01:45:18,572
[Ryan grunts]
2143
01:45:29,235 --> 01:45:31,324
You drank!
2144
01:45:31,324 --> 01:45:35,372
You turned your map app
back on at 17:36:22.
2145
01:45:36,677 --> 01:45:39,767
Impact was at 17:36:24.
2146
01:45:41,290 --> 01:45:45,251
Skid marks show you lost
30 feet before you swerved.
2147
01:45:46,426 --> 01:45:49,255
You didn't have time to stop
2148
01:45:49,255 --> 01:45:52,084
because you were looking at
your fucking phone, Allison.
2149
01:45:53,607 --> 01:45:55,130
Stop blaming Alvarez.
2150
01:45:56,567 --> 01:45:58,525
They're dead because of you.
2151
01:46:08,405 --> 01:46:09,580
[stifles sob]
2152
01:46:09,580 --> 01:46:10,755
[car door closes]
2153
01:46:11,625 --> 01:46:13,410
[sobbing softly]
2154
01:46:17,936 --> 01:46:19,938
All right. All right.
It's all right.
2155
01:46:19,938 --> 01:46:21,243
Come here. Come here.
2156
01:46:22,941 --> 01:46:25,117
It's all right. Okay.
2157
01:46:28,250 --> 01:46:29,687
[kid] No, that can't go
over there.
2158
01:46:29,687 --> 01:46:31,253
That can't...
2159
01:46:32,254 --> 01:46:34,343
That can't... That can't go...
2160
01:47:05,679 --> 01:47:08,290
[soft music playing]
2161
01:47:30,356 --> 01:47:31,618
Good morning.
2162
01:47:32,358 --> 01:47:33,533
Good morning.
2163
01:47:34,882 --> 01:47:36,449
I made a house.
2164
01:47:38,712 --> 01:47:40,061
Do you have a headache?
2165
01:47:42,586 --> 01:47:43,587
Yeah.
2166
01:47:49,549 --> 01:47:51,029
Hey.
2167
01:47:51,029 --> 01:47:53,074
Can I, uh, sell this, please?
2168
01:48:02,519 --> 01:48:03,607
I'll give you $12,500.
2169
01:48:05,043 --> 01:48:06,435
Yeah. Yeah, okay. Thank you.
2170
01:48:07,175 --> 01:48:08,394
It is a beauty.
2171
01:48:10,570 --> 01:48:12,180
[piano music playing]
2172
01:48:12,180 --> 01:48:15,619
[Allison singing
"I Hate Myself"]
♪ I woke up today ♪
2173
01:48:17,359 --> 01:48:20,362
♪ At least that much is true ♪
2174
01:48:24,192 --> 01:48:27,326
♪ I saw what people see ♪
2175
01:48:29,328 --> 01:48:33,288
♪ What a year this made of me ♪
2176
01:48:40,469 --> 01:48:44,648
♪ I tried a hundred times ♪
2177
01:48:44,648 --> 01:48:49,130
♪ But each time
I thought of you ♪
2178
01:48:50,784 --> 01:48:52,612
Thank you.
2179
01:48:52,612 --> 01:48:57,835
♪ I hate myself ♪
2180
01:48:57,835 --> 01:49:01,665
♪ I fuckin' hate myself ♪
2181
01:49:07,584 --> 01:49:08,628
[crowd cheering]
2182
01:49:08,628 --> 01:49:13,241
♪ And I ♪
2183
01:49:15,113 --> 01:49:18,943
♪ I want days of pain ♪
2184
01:49:21,641 --> 01:49:24,862
♪ Oh, to feel ♪
2185
01:49:24,862 --> 01:49:29,040
♪ The things I need ♪
2186
01:49:33,697 --> 01:49:36,177
♪ To pay off this shame ♪
2187
01:49:36,177 --> 01:49:40,094
♪ And I know
that makes me broken ♪
2188
01:49:40,094 --> 01:49:44,142
♪ I know that makes me weak ♪
2189
01:49:46,492 --> 01:49:50,714
♪ I guess I'll put
my armor back on now ♪
2190
01:49:52,280 --> 01:49:55,240
♪ I found a way ♪
2191
01:49:55,240 --> 01:49:58,069
♪ But I turned around ♪
2192
01:50:00,549 --> 01:50:03,248
♪ One step to start ♪
2193
01:50:03,248 --> 01:50:08,035
♪ But I'd rather fall down ♪
2194
01:50:10,951 --> 01:50:13,911
♪ Too much of a coward ♪
2195
01:50:13,911 --> 01:50:17,088
♪ To just say I'm wrong ♪
2196
01:50:17,088 --> 01:50:19,220
[Ryan] Grandpa, you are not
gonna believe this.
2197
01:50:19,220 --> 01:50:20,395
One of the girls on the team
2198
01:50:20,395 --> 01:50:21,875
invited me to a party
this weekend.
2199
01:50:22,223 --> 01:50:23,529
You?
2200
01:50:23,529 --> 01:50:24,922
- Yes, me!
- [laughs]
2201
01:50:28,969 --> 01:50:32,625
[Allison continues singing]
♪ Help me, please ♪
2202
01:50:34,235 --> 01:50:38,065
♪ Try to fix yourself ♪
2203
01:50:38,065 --> 01:50:40,851
♪ That's all they said to me ♪
2204
01:50:49,773 --> 01:50:52,819
♪ Try to fix myself ♪
2205
01:50:54,038 --> 01:50:57,389
♪ To know how hard
that would be ♪
2206
01:51:05,571 --> 01:51:07,616
[song ends]
2207
01:51:07,616 --> 01:51:08,530
Hi.
2208
01:51:10,750 --> 01:51:11,751
Hi.
2209
01:51:16,016 --> 01:51:17,539
Thank you so much for coming.
2210
01:51:18,671 --> 01:51:19,585
Sure.
2211
01:51:24,111 --> 01:51:25,722
- You look great.
- [both chuckle]
2212
01:51:26,635 --> 01:51:27,898
I nearly put makeup on,
2213
01:51:27,898 --> 01:51:30,030
and then I just laughed
at myself. [laughs]
2214
01:51:32,380 --> 01:51:33,425
Do you like my clips?
2215
01:51:34,165 --> 01:51:35,688
Wow, yeah.
2216
01:51:35,688 --> 01:51:37,124
I stole them from a pharmacy.
2217
01:51:37,864 --> 01:51:38,952
- [scoffs]
- Not recently.
2218
01:51:38,952 --> 01:51:41,128
- Like, a while back.
- [both laugh]
2219
01:51:45,524 --> 01:51:46,786
I don't know where to start.
2220
01:51:46,786 --> 01:51:47,787
That's okay.
2221
01:51:48,353 --> 01:51:49,963
Um, I'll start.
2222
01:51:51,835 --> 01:51:52,879
[smacks lips]
2223
01:51:53,575 --> 01:51:55,360
[breathes deeply]
2224
01:51:57,579 --> 01:51:59,277
Nate, I didn't have...
2225
01:52:01,453 --> 01:52:02,933
the faintest idea
2226
01:52:04,456 --> 01:52:06,414
how to handle my own grief.
2227
01:52:09,853 --> 01:52:12,420
I didn't even know
if I was allowed to grieve.
2228
01:52:12,420 --> 01:52:14,771
We were all flailing.
2229
01:52:14,771 --> 01:52:16,947
Yeah, but I abandoned you,
2230
01:52:18,078 --> 01:52:19,732
and that was so selfish.
2231
01:52:22,169 --> 01:52:24,476
I ran as fast as I could
away from you.
2232
01:52:25,651 --> 01:52:27,653
I still wanted you
to be my wife.
2233
01:52:29,133 --> 01:52:30,177
I know.
2234
01:52:35,095 --> 01:52:37,228
But the truth is, Nate, I...
2235
01:52:39,317 --> 01:52:40,927
I was so sure
2236
01:52:42,407 --> 01:52:43,277
I was gonna...
2237
01:52:47,542 --> 01:52:49,675
- try...
- I know.
2238
01:52:51,808 --> 01:52:53,157
And you know I tried.
2239
01:52:55,637 --> 01:52:57,422
I tried, but I couldn't.
2240
01:52:59,946 --> 01:53:01,818
'Cause I didn't wanna
hurt you again.
2241
01:53:01,818 --> 01:53:03,602
It wasn't your fault.
2242
01:53:03,602 --> 01:53:04,777
It was.
2243
01:53:06,518 --> 01:53:07,911
Your dad was right.
2244
01:53:09,521 --> 01:53:10,870
If I hadn't been looking
at my phone,
2245
01:53:10,870 --> 01:53:12,393
I could have stopped in time.
2246
01:53:16,702 --> 01:53:19,748
You deserve an apology that
never came, and I'm so sorry.
2247
01:53:24,405 --> 01:53:25,537
I'm really sorry.
2248
01:53:27,887 --> 01:53:29,062
[sighs]
2249
01:53:29,062 --> 01:53:30,150
[chuckles dryly]
2250
01:53:32,370 --> 01:53:34,285
I've been spending some time
with him lately.
2251
01:53:34,285 --> 01:53:35,329
Yeah.
2252
01:53:36,635 --> 01:53:39,159
- Oh, it's a work-in-progress.
- [chuckles]
2253
01:53:40,378 --> 01:53:41,379
Good.
2254
01:53:44,773 --> 01:53:46,340
He kept me alive, you know.
2255
01:53:50,388 --> 01:53:51,650
I know about your ear.
2256
01:53:57,612 --> 01:54:02,139
Hey... I need you
to be clear on one thing.
2257
01:54:04,924 --> 01:54:06,491
I loved you so much.
2258
01:54:10,234 --> 01:54:11,888
[tearfully] And along
with everything else,
2259
01:54:13,367 --> 01:54:14,847
I will forever grieve
2260
01:54:14,847 --> 01:54:17,110
for the life that we might
have had. [sniffles]
2261
01:54:19,983 --> 01:54:21,071
Me too.
2262
01:54:24,639 --> 01:54:26,859
- We were a good team.
- [both chuckle softly]
2263
01:54:28,252 --> 01:54:30,123
It would be nice
2264
01:54:30,123 --> 01:54:32,038
if we could one day
find some way
2265
01:54:32,038 --> 01:54:33,910
to be in each other's lives.
2266
01:54:34,867 --> 01:54:36,434
Maybe that's unrealistic,
2267
01:54:36,434 --> 01:54:37,652
- but...
- Maybe.
2268
01:54:38,784 --> 01:54:39,741
[softly] Yeah.
2269
01:54:41,395 --> 01:54:42,570
Maybe.
2270
01:54:53,755 --> 01:54:55,496
I think
we can all thank Elaine.
2271
01:54:55,496 --> 01:54:57,107
Thank you so much.
2272
01:54:57,107 --> 01:54:59,370
I really appreciated
getting to know you,
2273
01:54:59,370 --> 01:55:01,459
and talking to you.
2274
01:55:01,459 --> 01:55:04,157
Everybody, our deeply
inappropriate stories
2275
01:55:04,157 --> 01:55:05,550
- from yesterday...
- [all laughing]
2276
01:55:05,550 --> 01:55:08,727
...have been well in my head.
King's laughing.
2277
01:55:08,727 --> 01:55:11,121
Your stories are foul. [laughs]
2278
01:55:12,426 --> 01:55:14,037
Mama,
2279
01:55:14,037 --> 01:55:15,342
I'm so grateful for you.
2280
01:55:15,342 --> 01:55:17,475
Thank you for everything
you've done for me.
2281
01:55:17,475 --> 01:55:18,955
And I love you.
2282
01:55:20,521 --> 01:55:23,046
[all applauding]
2283
01:55:23,046 --> 01:55:25,396
[soft piano music playing]
2284
01:55:28,965 --> 01:55:31,968
The food was terrible.
Thank you.
2285
01:55:31,968 --> 01:55:33,926
[Allison singing
"The Best Part"]
♪ I can't shake you off, dear ♪
2286
01:55:33,926 --> 01:55:37,364
♪ It's something
I have tried to do ♪
2287
01:55:37,364 --> 01:55:41,542
♪ But I can't
shake you off, dear ♪
2288
01:55:41,542 --> 01:55:44,719
♪ Sit on trains
and think of you ♪
2289
01:55:44,719 --> 01:55:46,417
♪ But I...♪
2290
01:55:46,417 --> 01:55:50,987
♪ Oh, I can't tell ♪
2291
01:55:52,075 --> 01:55:58,255
♪ If it hurts or it helps ♪
2292
01:56:00,474 --> 01:56:06,306
♪ So breathe me in ♪
2293
01:56:07,351 --> 01:56:11,790
♪ One last time ♪
2294
01:56:15,098 --> 01:56:17,926
♪ And we play ♪
2295
01:56:17,926 --> 01:56:23,149
♪ Our rehearsed ♪
2296
01:56:23,149 --> 01:56:27,240
♪ Goodbyes ♪
2297
01:56:30,896 --> 01:56:34,726
♪ I can't shake you off, dear ♪
2298
01:56:34,726 --> 01:56:38,991
♪ It's something
I have tried to do ♪
2299
01:56:38,991 --> 01:56:43,604
♪ But I can't
shake you off, dear ♪
2300
01:56:43,604 --> 01:56:47,434
♪ I sit on trains
and think of you ♪
2301
01:56:48,479 --> 01:56:54,876
♪ But you are the best part ♪
2302
01:56:56,574 --> 01:57:01,840
♪ You ♪
2303
01:57:04,669 --> 01:57:05,931
Thank you.
2304
01:57:05,931 --> 01:57:09,456
[scattered applause]
2305
01:57:09,456 --> 01:57:12,981
Um, I recently recorded
my first EP,
2306
01:57:12,981 --> 01:57:14,418
and it's at the coat check
2307
01:57:14,418 --> 01:57:16,898
because I'm also
the coat check girl.
2308
01:57:16,898 --> 01:57:19,075
Uh, so come buy a CD,
2309
01:57:19,075 --> 01:57:20,598
or I won't give you
your coats back.
2310
01:57:20,598 --> 01:57:22,600
[people laughing]
2311
01:57:26,125 --> 01:57:27,561
[cell phone ringing]
2312
01:57:31,913 --> 01:57:33,698
Hi.
2313
01:57:33,698 --> 01:57:35,700
I know you're calling
about my one-year clean,
2314
01:57:35,700 --> 01:57:37,876
but I need to tell you
what I just did.
2315
01:57:40,618 --> 01:57:42,141
Yeah. No, I can talk.
2316
01:57:43,925 --> 01:57:44,839
Okay.
2317
01:57:54,936 --> 01:57:56,851
[somber music playing]
2318
01:57:58,026 --> 01:57:59,289
Hey, Dwayne.
2319
01:57:59,289 --> 01:58:00,812
Could you take these
to the kitchen for me?
2320
01:58:00,812 --> 01:58:02,466
Thank you so much.
2321
01:58:02,466 --> 01:58:05,208
[soft, indistinct chatter]
2322
01:58:05,208 --> 01:58:06,905
[Simone] She'll give it back.
Right, Ryan?
2323
01:58:06,905 --> 01:58:08,385
- That's nice.
- [Ryan] Thank you.
2324
01:58:08,385 --> 01:58:11,692
Hey. How's it going?
Ooh, wait, I have cupcakes.
2325
01:58:11,692 --> 01:58:14,042
- Need any help?
- No, no, no. I'm all good.
Thank you.
2326
01:58:14,042 --> 01:58:15,000
Actually, we broke up
2327
01:58:15,000 --> 01:58:16,219
- a few months ago.
- Yeah...
2328
01:58:16,219 --> 01:58:17,524
- [Allison] Hey, Mama.
- Yes?
2329
01:58:17,524 --> 01:58:20,223
Could you go pass these around
over there?
2330
01:58:20,223 --> 01:58:21,354
I think they would like some.
2331
01:58:21,354 --> 01:58:22,616
- Sure.
- Thank you.
2332
01:58:22,616 --> 01:58:24,792
- Ooh, they smell so good.
- They are good.
2333
01:58:45,857 --> 01:58:47,859
[somber music continues]
2334
01:59:01,960 --> 01:59:02,874
[switch clicks]
2335
01:59:38,779 --> 01:59:40,477
[Daniel] Dear Allison.
2336
01:59:40,477 --> 01:59:44,002
Down here in 1:87 scale,
2337
01:59:44,002 --> 01:59:45,569
the lovers always kiss,
2338
01:59:46,439 --> 01:59:49,137
the neighbors are always kind,
2339
01:59:49,137 --> 01:59:52,184
and the trains always
take you to the far-off places
2340
01:59:52,184 --> 01:59:54,447
you always swore you'd go.
2341
01:59:56,144 --> 01:59:58,277
In life, of course,
2342
01:59:58,277 --> 02:00:00,540
nothing is nearly
as neat and tidy.
2343
02:00:02,281 --> 02:00:05,415
Everything I own has been left
to Nathan and Ryan.
2344
02:00:06,416 --> 02:00:08,244
Nathan has agreed to move home
2345
02:00:08,244 --> 02:00:11,029
and be her guardian
until she's off to college.
2346
02:00:12,160 --> 02:00:13,292
He'll need help.
2347
02:00:14,293 --> 02:00:16,948
Please help him, Allie.
2348
02:00:16,948 --> 02:00:20,386
Molly always said Nathan was
the best version of himself
2349
02:00:20,386 --> 02:00:21,561
when he was with you.
2350
02:00:22,780 --> 02:00:24,434
Who knows,
2351
02:00:24,434 --> 02:00:29,003
maybe you can even get her
into Stanford. [chuckles]
2352
02:00:29,003 --> 02:00:30,962
When we first met
in that diner,
2353
02:00:31,832 --> 02:00:34,618
you asked what my tattoo meant.
2354
02:00:34,618 --> 02:00:37,577
- Amor fati is Latin.
- [typewriter clacking]
2355
02:00:37,577 --> 02:00:39,753
It means "to love one's fate."
2356
02:00:40,972 --> 02:00:44,236
Neither of us
chose this fate, Allie.
2357
02:00:44,236 --> 02:00:47,892
But perhaps we can find a way
to love it.
2358
02:00:47,892 --> 02:00:51,983
Fate has given me
one final year with my son.
2359
02:00:51,983 --> 02:00:55,116
He looks at me differently
these days.
2360
02:00:55,116 --> 02:00:58,206
Once in a while I even
catch him smiling at me
2361
02:00:58,206 --> 02:01:01,558
with a look that might
just even be love.
2362
02:01:02,907 --> 02:01:04,952
Amor fati, Allison.
2363
02:01:06,127 --> 02:01:07,477
Until we meet again,
2364
02:01:08,869 --> 02:01:09,870
Daniel.
2365
02:01:13,396 --> 02:01:14,397
[Ryan] Allie?
2366
02:01:15,006 --> 02:01:16,312
Yeah?
2367
02:01:16,312 --> 02:01:17,400
What are you doing?
2368
02:01:18,836 --> 02:01:19,924
Come on upstairs.
2369
02:01:19,924 --> 02:01:20,881
[Allison] Yeah, okay.
2370
02:01:29,368 --> 02:01:32,502
["Deep In Love" playing]
2371
02:01:36,506 --> 02:01:37,507
[switch clicks]
2372
02:01:46,516 --> 02:01:51,521
♪ Down in the valley
the first of May ♪
2373
02:01:52,696 --> 02:01:55,089
[door creaks]
2374
02:01:55,089 --> 02:02:00,704
♪ Gatherin' flowers
both fresh and gay ♪
2375
02:02:03,794 --> 02:02:10,757
♪ Gatherin' flowers
both red and blue ♪
2376
02:02:10,757 --> 02:02:12,890
♪ How little thought
of what... ♪
2377
02:02:12,890 --> 02:02:15,719
[Allison breathes deeply]
2378
02:02:15,719 --> 02:02:18,069
♪ ...what love could you do ♪
2379
02:02:19,505 --> 02:02:23,770
♪ Don't you ♪
2380
02:02:27,383 --> 02:02:31,561
♪ Break my heart ♪
2381
02:02:36,870 --> 02:02:40,396
♪ Don't you ♪
2382
02:02:44,704 --> 02:02:48,360
♪ Break my heart ♪
2383
02:02:55,759 --> 02:03:01,242
♪ I put my hand in
into the bush ♪
2384
02:03:04,724 --> 02:03:08,728
♪ Finding the sweetest
sweetest rose ♪
2385
02:03:13,080 --> 02:03:18,999
♪ I pricked my finger
deep to the line ♪
2386
02:03:20,131 --> 02:03:24,396
♪ And left the sweetest rose ♪
2387
02:03:24,396 --> 02:03:28,705
♪ Sweetest rose behind ♪
2388
02:03:28,705 --> 02:03:32,230
♪ Don't you ♪
2389
02:03:36,582 --> 02:03:40,325
♪ Break my heart ♪
2390
02:03:45,896 --> 02:03:49,813
♪ Don't you ♪
2391
02:03:53,730 --> 02:03:58,125
♪ Break my heart ♪
2392
02:04:37,425 --> 02:04:42,039
♪ Don't you ♪
2393
02:04:45,129 --> 02:04:49,046
♪ Break my heart ♪
2394
02:04:54,573 --> 02:04:59,491
♪ Don't you ♪
2395
02:05:02,625 --> 02:05:06,585
♪ Break my heart ♪
2396
02:05:13,331 --> 02:05:18,858
♪ Thousands and thousands
all on this Earth ♪
2397
02:05:18,858 --> 02:05:20,947
[song ends]
2398
02:05:20,947 --> 02:05:22,775
["On My Mind" playing]
2399
02:05:32,132 --> 02:05:35,658
♪ Honey you've been
on my mind ♪
2400
02:05:35,658 --> 02:05:39,139
♪ Like Christmas and birthdays
when I was five ♪
2401
02:05:39,139 --> 02:05:41,315
♪ Like the ticking clock
for racers ♪
2402
02:05:41,315 --> 02:05:43,448
♪ And those
in the prison line ♪
2403
02:05:43,448 --> 02:05:47,147
♪ Like Everest for Mallory and
how drinkers know their wine ♪
2404
02:05:47,147 --> 02:05:50,847
♪ And the birds and the bees
when you hit nine ♪
2405
02:05:50,847 --> 02:05:54,981
♪ And pearls for those girls
2406
02:05:54,981 --> 02:05:58,637
♪ Who always have their hair
in pretty curls ♪
2407
02:05:58,637 --> 02:06:07,864
♪ You're on my mind ♪
2408
02:06:07,864 --> 02:06:11,389
♪ Honey you've been
in my head ♪
2409
02:06:11,389 --> 02:06:15,349
♪ Like homework on Sunday when
I've been laughing instead ♪
2410
02:06:15,349 --> 02:06:19,223
♪ Like cigarettes for the cool
kids behind the garden shed ♪
2411
02:06:19,223 --> 02:06:23,880
♪ And love for the lovers
and the elephant by my bed ♪
2412
02:06:23,880 --> 02:06:27,927
♪ And pearls for those girls ♪
2413
02:06:27,927 --> 02:06:31,888
♪ Who always have their hair
in pretty curls ♪
2414
02:06:31,888 --> 02:06:35,979
♪ And football
for English boys ♪
2415
02:06:35,979 --> 02:06:39,722
♪ Who always have
the newest toys ♪
2416
02:06:39,722 --> 02:06:50,080
♪ You're on my mind ♪
2417
02:06:56,782 --> 02:07:03,528
♪ So don't you
go away too long ♪
2418
02:07:04,964 --> 02:07:18,499
♪ Oh don't you
go away too long ♪
2419
02:07:19,326 --> 02:07:23,504
♪ Oh don't you go ♪
2420
02:07:23,504 --> 02:07:27,465
♪ Away too long ♪
2421
02:07:27,465 --> 02:07:31,687
♪ You're on my mind ♪
2422
02:07:32,600 --> 02:07:37,605
♪ You're on my mind ♪
2423
02:07:37,605 --> 02:07:38,694
[song ends]