1 00:00:03,503 --> 00:00:04,546 [ Gasps ] 2 00:00:10,385 --> 00:00:11,887 I just saw a ghost, y'all! 3 00:00:13,305 --> 00:00:14,681 Why are we doing this? It was a ghost. 4 00:00:14,681 --> 00:00:16,600 I came around the corner, he was sitting right there. 5 00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:18,185 I'm thinking he's like a Victorian era -- 6 00:00:18,185 --> 00:00:20,479 Oh, my God, they're multiplying! 7 00:00:20,479 --> 00:00:23,899 Uh, hi. We're looking for Principal Coleman. 8 00:00:23,899 --> 00:00:25,692 It's our son Charlie's first day. 9 00:00:25,692 --> 00:00:27,861 We enrolled via the district website. 10 00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:29,821 [ Chuckles ] Please tell me you guys see them, too. 11 00:00:29,821 --> 00:00:31,281 Melissa: Ava. You know what? 12 00:00:31,281 --> 00:00:32,157 Let me go get my proton pack. 13 00:00:32,157 --> 00:00:33,450 Hey, hey, stop. Stop. 14 00:00:33,450 --> 00:00:36,411 So, they're building a big-time PGA golf course 15 00:00:36,411 --> 00:00:39,248 about 10 blocks away from here in the Girard Creek area. 16 00:00:39,248 --> 00:00:41,458 It's allegedly good for the city, 17 00:00:41,458 --> 00:00:42,668 and people are into it. 18 00:00:42,668 --> 00:00:45,879 And, um, new people are moving to Philly -- 19 00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:48,799 West Philly -- just to play there. 20 00:00:48,799 --> 00:00:50,092 So... 21 00:00:50,092 --> 00:00:52,552 And while Tiger Woods is a notable golfer, 22 00:00:52,552 --> 00:00:54,972 the demographic of most golfers 23 00:00:54,972 --> 00:00:57,849 is mainly, um... 24 00:00:57,849 --> 00:00:58,976 We're so excited to be here. 25 00:00:58,976 --> 00:01:00,394 Yeah, we were recommended we go private 26 00:01:00,394 --> 00:01:02,187 from, gosh, nearly every person 27 00:01:02,187 --> 00:01:04,314 and website we know, but we were like, 28 00:01:04,314 --> 00:01:06,441 "Hey, public all the way!" [ Laughter ] 29 00:01:06,441 --> 00:01:07,651 So... 30 00:01:07,651 --> 00:01:09,111 Well, it's great to have you. 31 00:01:09,111 --> 00:01:10,612 This is new. Yeah. 32 00:01:10,612 --> 00:01:12,030 First time in all my years. 33 00:01:12,030 --> 00:01:13,448 Well, thrilled to meet you. 34 00:01:13,448 --> 00:01:14,741 And, uh, just because it's nice to have 35 00:01:14,741 --> 00:01:15,951 a new student, and no other reasons. 36 00:01:15,951 --> 00:01:17,828 Okay, and I'm Ms. Teagues. 37 00:01:17,828 --> 00:01:19,204 I believe I'm your teacher, Charlie. 38 00:01:19,204 --> 00:01:21,290 Welcome. And it's so nice to meet you both. 39 00:01:21,290 --> 00:01:23,333 And I'm Principal Coleman, 40 00:01:23,333 --> 00:01:24,960 the one you were looking for. 41 00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:26,378 Totally remember you enrolling 42 00:01:26,378 --> 00:01:28,380 the little and very real Charlie. 43 00:01:28,380 --> 00:01:31,300 And we are incredibly pleased to have you 44 00:01:31,300 --> 00:01:32,843 and welcome you to the rich, 45 00:01:32,843 --> 00:01:35,470 diverse tapestry of Abbott Elementary. 46 00:01:35,470 --> 00:01:36,346 You'll fit right in. 47 00:01:37,306 --> 00:01:38,932 Are we being audited? 48 00:01:38,932 --> 00:01:41,935 [ Maker's "Hold'em" playing ] 49 00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:46,606 ♪♪ 50 00:01:46,606 --> 00:01:51,445 ♪♪ 51 00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:52,571 Janine: Come on in. 52 00:01:52,571 --> 00:01:53,655 Hello, Ms. Teagues. 53 00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:55,449 Oh. Hello, Mr. Eddie. 54 00:01:55,449 --> 00:01:56,867 Hope your day's going well. 55 00:01:56,867 --> 00:01:58,660 It is. Thank you for asking. Mm. 56 00:01:58,660 --> 00:02:00,495 And I hope your day is going well, as well. 57 00:02:00,495 --> 00:02:01,955 It is. Thank you. 58 00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:09,004 So, Gregory and I did try out a relationship for a little bit, 59 00:02:09,004 --> 00:02:12,049 but in the end, it just didn't work out. 60 00:02:12,049 --> 00:02:14,468 So, now, we are back to being friends. 61 00:02:15,552 --> 00:02:16,762 Just kidding! Ha, ha! 62 00:02:16,762 --> 00:02:18,055 We got y'all! Yeah. 63 00:02:18,055 --> 00:02:19,348 So we're, um... 64 00:02:19,348 --> 00:02:20,766 W-We're dating. We're dating, yeah. 65 00:02:20,766 --> 00:02:22,601 After the party that night, we started dating. 66 00:02:22,601 --> 00:02:24,144 Yeah. And it's been going really, really well. 67 00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:26,396 Right, and I'm happy. I would tell everyone, 68 00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:28,899 but Janine so intelligently pointed out that 69 00:02:28,899 --> 00:02:31,109 we should keep our work and personal lives separate. 70 00:02:31,109 --> 00:02:32,569 And I have to agree with that. 71 00:02:32,569 --> 00:02:34,279 Yeah, yeah. And on top of that, 72 00:02:34,279 --> 00:02:35,864 we just get to have fun 73 00:02:35,864 --> 00:02:37,824 and let our relationship be 74 00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:39,034 just us, you know? Mm-hmm. 75 00:02:39,034 --> 00:02:41,620 So, aside from Jacob, nobody knows. 76 00:02:41,620 --> 00:02:42,621 Nobody. 77 00:02:42,621 --> 00:02:43,747 Together: We all know. 78 00:02:43,747 --> 00:02:45,290 It's just beyond obvious. 79 00:02:45,290 --> 00:02:46,541 I don't even know how their dumb asses 80 00:02:46,541 --> 00:02:47,501 think they hidin' it. 81 00:02:47,501 --> 00:02:48,585 They stay in each other's faces. 82 00:02:48,585 --> 00:02:50,087 Dumbasses. 83 00:02:50,087 --> 00:02:51,672 Barbara: But we're gonna let them have their space 84 00:02:51,672 --> 00:02:54,007 because, clearly, they need it. 85 00:02:54,007 --> 00:02:55,342 Honestly, I don't care that much. 86 00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:56,718 I got bills, you know? 87 00:02:56,718 --> 00:02:58,261 I know that's right. If anything, 88 00:02:58,261 --> 00:03:00,180 it's an insult to our intelligence. 89 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:02,015 We know what two people look like when they hunchin' hard. 90 00:03:02,015 --> 00:03:03,016 We're not dumb. 91 00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:04,101 Mnh-mnh. Mnh-mnh. 92 00:03:04,101 --> 00:03:05,227 Alright class, we're going to 93 00:03:05,227 --> 00:03:07,062 unfold our paper, 94 00:03:07,062 --> 00:03:08,939 and we have a beautiful... 95 00:03:08,939 --> 00:03:10,399 Children: Butterfly! 96 00:03:10,399 --> 00:03:12,359 Yes! Specifically, 97 00:03:12,359 --> 00:03:15,112 an orange sulfur butterfly, 98 00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:18,949 which is native to Pennsylvania! 99 00:03:18,949 --> 00:03:21,284 Can't find that in Jersey, now, can you? 100 00:03:21,284 --> 00:03:23,370 Children: No! 101 00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:24,538 [ Water trickling ] 102 00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:26,373 What in the world? 103 00:03:26,373 --> 00:03:29,042 Hey, Barb, is your water pressure low? 104 00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:30,669 Some kid just sneezed God knows what in my hand, 105 00:03:30,669 --> 00:03:32,462 and I got no water going on. 106 00:03:32,462 --> 00:03:33,422 Me too. 107 00:03:33,422 --> 00:03:34,589 Ugh! 108 00:03:34,589 --> 00:03:35,757 Ava? Oh! 109 00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:38,760 Ava? A-va! 110 00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:40,554 What is going on? 111 00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:43,265 The water pressure is lower than Gerald's iron. 112 00:03:43,265 --> 00:03:44,683 Now, who the hell is Gerald? 113 00:03:44,683 --> 00:03:47,144 Look, it's the new golf course. They broke a water pipe. 114 00:03:47,144 --> 00:03:48,478 There's nothing we can do about it. 115 00:03:48,478 --> 00:03:50,689 I'm just about fed up with this golf course construction. 116 00:03:50,689 --> 00:03:52,274 Mm-hmm. Just blocking up traffic, 117 00:03:52,274 --> 00:03:53,692 making it difficult to get in here 118 00:03:53,692 --> 00:03:54,818 in the mornings, 119 00:03:54,818 --> 00:03:56,570 and the noise all day long! 120 00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:59,072 And I've noticed an uptick in the rodents and bugs. 121 00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:00,198 That's construction, too. Mm! 122 00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:01,783 I killed 30 roaches this morning. 123 00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:02,659 Oh. [ Sprays ] 124 00:04:02,659 --> 00:04:05,370 Hey! 31. This has to stop. 125 00:04:05,370 --> 00:04:07,747 Ava: Look, I gotta listen to y'all complain all damn day. 126 00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:10,333 "We want books. We want paper towels in the classroom." 127 00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:11,918 Bet you want raises, too. 128 00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:13,670 Yeah, I like money. I'm still waiting on the paper towels. 129 00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:14,588 This project is backed by the city, 130 00:04:14,588 --> 00:04:15,881 so there's nothing I can do. 131 00:04:15,881 --> 00:04:17,299 And don't forget -- 132 00:04:17,299 --> 00:04:18,884 back-to-school staff meeting tomorrow. 133 00:04:18,884 --> 00:04:21,470 Have your presentations ready with your proposed yearly goals. 134 00:04:21,470 --> 00:04:22,762 Melissa: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [ Stomps ] 135 00:04:22,762 --> 00:04:24,139 Hey! 32. 136 00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:26,016 Must you kill these living creatures 137 00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:27,476 so forcefully? 138 00:04:27,476 --> 00:04:29,311 I didn't get that one. It's headed to you. 139 00:04:29,311 --> 00:04:30,395 [ Both scream ] 140 00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:31,813 Die! Die! [ Melissa screams ] 141 00:04:31,813 --> 00:04:33,356 Aah! [ Spraying ] 142 00:04:33,356 --> 00:04:35,025 Gregory: Going to do my presentation on 143 00:04:35,025 --> 00:04:36,985 the benefits of plants in each classroom. 144 00:04:36,985 --> 00:04:37,778 Try to get people on board for that. 145 00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:39,696 That is so amazing. 146 00:04:39,696 --> 00:04:41,531 I mean, it's -- it's very thoughtful. 147 00:04:41,531 --> 00:04:43,784 I mean, it's no school-wide field trip 148 00:04:43,784 --> 00:04:45,744 to the Baltimore Aquarium, like your presentation. [ Sighs ] 149 00:04:45,744 --> 00:04:47,370 Principal Coleman, you have a second? 150 00:04:47,370 --> 00:04:49,164 We're fact-checking for our podcast club. 151 00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:51,249 Yeah, we reported that Mr. Hill can't read, 152 00:04:51,249 --> 00:04:52,501 which turned out to be -- Not true! 153 00:04:52,501 --> 00:04:54,753 Why are you always asking us to read out loud, then? 154 00:04:54,753 --> 00:04:56,463 What are you fact-checking now? 155 00:04:56,463 --> 00:04:57,714 [ Cellphone chirps ] Are Ms. Teagues and Mr. Eddie dating? 156 00:04:57,714 --> 00:05:01,760 Uh, why not report on something a little more exciting? 157 00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:03,887 Like -- Like the weather, okay? 158 00:05:03,887 --> 00:05:05,639 It does often change. 159 00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:08,642 In fact, there's more to this Mr. C story. 160 00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:10,810 Like how he's always listening to audiobooks. 161 00:05:10,810 --> 00:05:12,562 [ Footsteps receding ] 162 00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:14,523 I was letting Janine and Gregory have their fun, 163 00:05:14,523 --> 00:05:16,399 but if the kids even know about them... 164 00:05:16,399 --> 00:05:18,860 Look, from my summer at principal school, 165 00:05:18,860 --> 00:05:20,820 I learned that I'll get in trouble if they get in trouble. 166 00:05:20,820 --> 00:05:22,072 So I got to take action. 167 00:05:22,072 --> 00:05:24,574 Which is my least favorite thing to take. 168 00:05:24,574 --> 00:05:25,784 Pizza here. 169 00:05:25,784 --> 00:05:28,036 I like the way you pass that pizza. 170 00:05:28,036 --> 00:05:29,996 I like the way you hand out milk boxes. 171 00:05:31,957 --> 00:05:33,792 That's for you. There you go. 172 00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:35,085 And you. 173 00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:37,504 Um, you know what? 174 00:05:37,504 --> 00:05:39,214 Maybe we wanna be more careful, 175 00:05:39,214 --> 00:05:41,508 because people might be watching, 176 00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:43,093 and we don't want people to get the wrong idea. 177 00:05:43,093 --> 00:05:46,221 Maybe, instead of always looking over our shoulders... 178 00:05:46,221 --> 00:05:47,389 Our very broad shoulders. [ Chuckles ] 179 00:05:47,389 --> 00:05:49,391 We should just tell our co-workers. 180 00:05:49,391 --> 00:05:50,850 Well, yeah, but, you know, 181 00:05:50,850 --> 00:05:54,354 we don't want everyone in our business of, like, what we are. 182 00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:55,230 And we can't forget HR. 183 00:05:55,230 --> 00:05:56,356 I mean, that's very intense. 184 00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:57,899 Yeah, I was thinking about that. 185 00:05:57,899 --> 00:05:59,609 HR is only an issue if somebody reports us, 186 00:05:59,609 --> 00:06:03,029 and HR hasn't been to this school since...ever. 187 00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:05,490 [ Intercom beeps ] Ava: Attention Abbott staff. 188 00:06:05,490 --> 00:06:07,951 Tomorrow, an HR representative from the district 189 00:06:07,951 --> 00:06:09,327 will be here for the day. 190 00:06:09,327 --> 00:06:11,329 He'll be available to all staff members 191 00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:12,998 if they feel the need to make any complaints 192 00:06:12,998 --> 00:06:14,374 or inquire about benefits 193 00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:15,917 or report anything -- 194 00:06:15,917 --> 00:06:17,294 anything at all. 195 00:06:17,294 --> 00:06:20,422 Mm, mm, mm. I know what that's about. 196 00:06:20,422 --> 00:06:22,007 You do? [ Chuckles ] 197 00:06:22,007 --> 00:06:23,258 Of course I do. 198 00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:27,095 Um... You've seen the way Melissa hits on me. 199 00:06:27,095 --> 00:06:29,681 She's always, "Mr. Johnson, my trash is filled." 200 00:06:29,681 --> 00:06:31,933 "Mr. Johnson, can you please take out my trash?" 201 00:06:31,933 --> 00:06:34,227 "Mr. Johnson, this is your whole job." 202 00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:35,562 Flirting her little ass off! 203 00:06:35,562 --> 00:06:36,688 Oh. Okay. 204 00:06:36,688 --> 00:06:38,356 She's going down. 205 00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:40,275 Get her! [ Chuckles lightly ] 206 00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:45,864 Jacob! I am not letting you microwave your beans 207 00:06:45,864 --> 00:06:47,324 with my tea. 208 00:06:47,324 --> 00:06:48,825 Barbara, please. We are running out of time 209 00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:50,577 before class starts. 210 00:06:50,577 --> 00:06:53,038 It is not my fault road closures allowed traffic to back up. 211 00:06:53,038 --> 00:06:55,373 Now, please, move your beans. 212 00:06:55,373 --> 00:06:56,333 [ Microwave clatters, beeps ] Thank you. 213 00:06:56,333 --> 00:06:57,334 I'll tell you what. 214 00:06:57,334 --> 00:06:59,336 If that golf course was a person 215 00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:02,255 and I wasn't a fully law-abiding citizen, 216 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:03,715 they'd be sinking to the bottom of 217 00:07:03,715 --> 00:07:05,216 the Schuylkill River right about now. 218 00:07:05,216 --> 00:07:05,967 My Bunsen burners aren't working. 219 00:07:05,967 --> 00:07:07,344 Who shut off the gas? 220 00:07:07,344 --> 00:07:08,928 Are you cooking eggs in your classroom? 221 00:07:08,928 --> 00:07:10,597 You needn't worry about matters concerning 222 00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:12,265 the breakfast sciences. Now, who did it? 223 00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:13,350 The construction workers turned off the gas 224 00:07:13,350 --> 00:07:14,559 to the entire grid. 225 00:07:14,559 --> 00:07:15,935 Mr. Morton: Aw. Nothing I can do about it. 226 00:07:15,935 --> 00:07:17,395 Write a letter to the city. 227 00:07:17,395 --> 00:07:19,189 I don't know what's more vile -- this golf course or Morton. 228 00:07:20,315 --> 00:07:22,025 Here are the pains in my asses. 229 00:07:22,025 --> 00:07:23,360 I'm sorry. The what? 230 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:24,736 Everyone, as promised, 231 00:07:24,736 --> 00:07:26,613 HR is here today. This is Warren. 232 00:07:26,613 --> 00:07:27,906 So if anyone has anything they want to file, 233 00:07:27,906 --> 00:07:28,907 just raise your hand. 234 00:07:28,907 --> 00:07:29,824 Not about me. 235 00:07:29,824 --> 00:07:31,618 About other things. 236 00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:32,952 Well... 237 00:07:32,952 --> 00:07:34,537 [ Bell rings ] Oh! 238 00:07:34,537 --> 00:07:36,373 And we're out of time. 239 00:07:36,373 --> 00:07:38,249 And...yours. 240 00:07:38,249 --> 00:07:40,293 Excuse me. Excuse me. 241 00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:42,587 Good morning, Daniel. 242 00:07:42,587 --> 00:07:45,799 Hey, how about Italian for dinner tonight? LaScala's? 243 00:07:45,799 --> 00:07:48,510 We're gonna be nice to our desk mates today, yeah, Yasmine? 244 00:07:48,510 --> 00:07:50,553 I'm good with that, as long as they got buttered noodles. 245 00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:52,097 I'd never take you anywhere without buttered noodles. 246 00:07:52,097 --> 00:07:52,889 [ Quietly ] Come on in. 247 00:07:54,557 --> 00:07:56,768 Yeah, it's nice talking to you while looking at you. 248 00:07:56,768 --> 00:07:58,186 [ Chuckles ] Which reminds me, 249 00:07:58,186 --> 00:08:00,689 when do you want to talk with/confess 250 00:08:00,689 --> 00:08:03,024 that we're dating to HR? 251 00:08:03,024 --> 00:08:04,025 I have fifth period free. 252 00:08:04,025 --> 00:08:06,236 Oh, yeah, um... 253 00:08:06,236 --> 00:08:07,987 How about, like, later? 254 00:08:07,987 --> 00:08:10,156 Like, after the back-to-school presentations? Okay? 255 00:08:10,156 --> 00:08:11,741 Uh, actually... [ Clears throat ] 256 00:08:11,741 --> 00:08:14,285 Good morning, Ms. Teagues. Good morning, Mr. Eddie. 257 00:08:14,285 --> 00:08:15,912 You remember Warren, right, Janine? 258 00:08:15,912 --> 00:08:17,205 HR at the district. Mm-hmm. 259 00:08:17,205 --> 00:08:19,666 Janine, it's so good to see you, 260 00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:22,168 after wasting our time at the district. [ Chuckles ] 261 00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:23,878 I told Superintendent Reynolds I knew you didn't have 262 00:08:23,878 --> 00:08:25,505 what it takes to be a district diva. 263 00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:27,674 It is good to see you again, Warren. 264 00:08:27,674 --> 00:08:30,927 Anything you want to make Warren aware of, you can. 265 00:08:30,927 --> 00:08:32,178 Anything at all. 266 00:08:35,014 --> 00:08:37,726 Well, um, we -- Well, we got nothing. 267 00:08:37,726 --> 00:08:40,770 Uh, except it is so good to see you, really. 268 00:08:40,770 --> 00:08:42,063 [ Warren chuckles ] 269 00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:46,067 Um, yeah, nothing to report. 270 00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:48,028 Well, he'll be here all day, 271 00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:50,155 if your memories happen to get jogged. 272 00:08:53,158 --> 00:08:55,869 Phew! Um, hey, real quick. 273 00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:56,828 Everything good? 274 00:08:56,828 --> 00:08:58,288 We could have at least tee'd it up. 275 00:08:58,288 --> 00:09:00,331 Yeah, no, everything is fine. 276 00:09:00,331 --> 00:09:04,002 It's just, um, you know, like we said, later today. 277 00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:06,254 We don't want to drop life-changing information 278 00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:08,298 before class even starts, right? 279 00:09:08,298 --> 00:09:10,258 [ Chuckles awkwardly ] So... 280 00:09:10,258 --> 00:09:12,260 Have a good morning, Mr. Eddie. 281 00:09:12,260 --> 00:09:14,220 Hey, good morning. How you doing? 282 00:09:14,220 --> 00:09:15,889 Children: Good morning, Ms. Teagues. 283 00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:17,348 Good morning, y'all. 284 00:09:17,348 --> 00:09:21,144 [ Children chattering ] 285 00:09:21,144 --> 00:09:22,937 My tooth fell out in the nugget! 286 00:09:22,937 --> 00:09:24,689 Melissa: Oh! Barbara: Oh! 287 00:09:24,689 --> 00:09:26,941 Wow, you used a lot of ketchup there. 288 00:09:26,941 --> 00:09:28,610 Oh, blood. That is blood. 289 00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:29,903 These are frozen. 290 00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,613 Have some pudding, hon. 291 00:09:31,613 --> 00:09:33,364 What? 292 00:09:33,364 --> 00:09:34,574 [ Nugget thuds ] Shanae! 293 00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:36,201 These nuggets are cold and hard! 294 00:09:36,201 --> 00:09:37,911 Thank you, Philadelphia Inquirer. 295 00:09:37,911 --> 00:09:39,204 You don't think I know? 296 00:09:39,204 --> 00:09:40,747 The gas still isn't back on. 297 00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:42,373 We heated them the best we could. 298 00:09:42,373 --> 00:09:43,958 We had to serve something. 299 00:09:43,958 --> 00:09:45,960 Ooh, I have had it up to heaven 300 00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:47,545 with this golf course! 301 00:09:47,545 --> 00:09:50,006 We cannot live like this the rest of the year. 302 00:09:50,006 --> 00:09:52,467 You know what? I'm gonna do a little sniffing around. 303 00:09:52,467 --> 00:09:55,011 Although, I don't really have the same connections 304 00:09:55,011 --> 00:09:56,596 I used to have in this city, 305 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:58,681 which I guess, in a way, is a sign of progress. 306 00:09:58,681 --> 00:09:59,474 Barbara: Oh. 307 00:10:04,229 --> 00:10:06,189 How'd the conversation go with the HR guy? 308 00:10:06,189 --> 00:10:07,273 Didn't go. 309 00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:09,692 It's Janine. 310 00:10:09,692 --> 00:10:10,944 Has she said anything to you? 311 00:10:10,944 --> 00:10:13,154 Is she like, not that into this relationship? 312 00:10:13,154 --> 00:10:16,157 Mnh-mnh. No. She's definitely deeply in like with you. 313 00:10:16,157 --> 00:10:17,992 And I know you all aren't ready to say it yet, 314 00:10:17,992 --> 00:10:20,036 but I love you both, you know. [ Door opens ] 315 00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:21,120 [ Clears throat loudly ] 316 00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:22,914 Uh, hey, um, 317 00:10:22,914 --> 00:10:24,457 I cannot find my presentation anywhere. 318 00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:25,959 I must have forgotten it at home. 319 00:10:25,959 --> 00:10:27,126 Can't you just print out another one? 320 00:10:27,126 --> 00:10:29,254 No, that one has my notes, you know? 321 00:10:29,254 --> 00:10:30,630 That's how I know when to be angry, 322 00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:32,549 when to be jovial, when to pause for a laugh. 323 00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:36,761 See? So, anyway, 324 00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:39,180 I don't have time to go home before the presentations. 325 00:10:39,180 --> 00:10:40,557 This is going to be bad. 326 00:10:40,557 --> 00:10:43,226 Um, well, I have a free period when my kids are at gym. 327 00:10:43,226 --> 00:10:46,104 I could run to your place, grab it, and head back. 328 00:10:46,104 --> 00:10:48,273 You're just the best. 329 00:10:48,273 --> 00:10:52,068 Okay, here are my house keys. 330 00:10:52,068 --> 00:10:53,027 You know how to get in. 331 00:10:55,947 --> 00:10:57,031 [ Footsteps receding ] 332 00:10:58,741 --> 00:11:00,910 [ Door opens ] 333 00:11:00,910 --> 00:11:01,995 Seems pretty into you. 334 00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:03,037 [ Door closes ] 335 00:11:03,037 --> 00:11:05,415 You have a little, um... Oh. 336 00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:06,708 Here, you want me to get it? No, don't. 337 00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:08,001 Okay. 338 00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:10,753 [ Indistinct conversations ] 339 00:11:10,753 --> 00:11:12,088 Guys, guys. 340 00:11:12,088 --> 00:11:13,756 Non-union workers. What? 341 00:11:13,756 --> 00:11:15,800 The golf course. They're using scabs. 342 00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:19,345 My cousin Tommy, he does construction with the Local 955, 343 00:11:19,345 --> 00:11:20,722 and they haven't been called. 344 00:11:20,722 --> 00:11:21,890 They're cutting corners. 345 00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:23,391 One word to the city, 346 00:11:23,391 --> 00:11:24,684 and this course is dunzo. Barbara: Ooh. 347 00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:27,103 Or, we can get my cousin to kill all their pets. 348 00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:28,146 I'mma leave it up to you. 349 00:11:28,146 --> 00:11:29,731 Call the city. Jesus! 350 00:11:29,731 --> 00:11:31,399 All right. Easy. 351 00:11:31,399 --> 00:11:33,151 This is why I gave you options. 352 00:11:33,151 --> 00:11:35,904 Thank you all for joining this mandatory meeting -- 353 00:11:35,904 --> 00:11:38,156 "2024 School Year Goals." 354 00:11:38,156 --> 00:11:39,741 First up, Barbara Howard, 355 00:11:39,741 --> 00:11:40,617 on teaching new math. 356 00:11:40,617 --> 00:11:42,994 [ Applause ] 357 00:11:43,995 --> 00:11:45,872 Thank you. 358 00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:47,498 Esteemed colleagues, 359 00:11:47,498 --> 00:11:49,751 I've decided to go in a different direction. 360 00:11:49,751 --> 00:11:53,129 Math hasn't changed, but what has changed, however, 361 00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:57,675 is the viscosity of child and adolescent rheum. 362 00:11:57,675 --> 00:11:59,552 [ Staff murmuring ] 363 00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:00,637 Boogers! 364 00:12:00,637 --> 00:12:02,222 Staff: Ohhh! 365 00:12:02,222 --> 00:12:05,642 Now, I know it might seem weird, but the consistency is changing, 366 00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:08,019 and it is alarming. 367 00:12:08,019 --> 00:12:09,187 [ Whispering ] Where's Gregory? 368 00:12:09,187 --> 00:12:10,897 He just texted and said he's in traffic 369 00:12:10,897 --> 00:12:11,731 because of road closures. 370 00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:13,441 Damn golf course! 371 00:12:13,441 --> 00:12:15,443 Jacob, I don't know my presentation, okay? 372 00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:16,986 If I don't do my presentation, 373 00:12:16,986 --> 00:12:18,238 the kids don't go to the aquarium. 374 00:12:18,238 --> 00:12:19,906 If the kids don't go to the aquarium, 375 00:12:19,906 --> 00:12:21,699 they fail the SATs. 376 00:12:21,699 --> 00:12:24,369 Just breathe. Barbara's still talking boogers. You got time. 377 00:12:24,369 --> 00:12:26,371 In conclusion... Damn it. 378 00:12:26,371 --> 00:12:28,915 ...I'm suggesting that we get our milk tested 379 00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:30,959 and our glue tested too. 380 00:12:30,959 --> 00:12:33,127 [ Applause ] 381 00:12:33,127 --> 00:12:35,338 Thank you, Barb. Janine, your turn. 382 00:12:35,338 --> 00:12:36,881 What? Come on, pipsqueak. 383 00:12:36,881 --> 00:12:37,966 Let's get this over with. 384 00:12:37,966 --> 00:12:39,050 Hmm. 385 00:12:39,050 --> 00:12:41,427 Okay. Alright. 386 00:12:44,514 --> 00:12:46,432 Let's give it up for Barb, right? 387 00:12:46,432 --> 00:12:48,851 We did that already. Yeah, yeah. Give it up for Barb. 388 00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:50,520 [ Scattered applause ] 389 00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:52,355 Alright. Hey, give it up for yourselves. 390 00:12:52,355 --> 00:12:53,815 Janine! 391 00:12:53,815 --> 00:12:55,149 Okay, okay, okay. 392 00:12:55,149 --> 00:12:58,736 So, uh, my school-year goal for 2024 393 00:12:58,736 --> 00:13:00,488 is to take us all 394 00:13:00,488 --> 00:13:02,782 to a field trip to the Baltimore Aquarium. 395 00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:04,492 [ Staff exclaim ] Yes, yes. 396 00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:05,785 But before I get into it, 397 00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:08,955 I think we should ask ourselves... 398 00:13:08,955 --> 00:13:12,959 What is an aquarium, really, when you think about it? 399 00:13:12,959 --> 00:13:15,169 And who's really in the tank? 400 00:13:15,169 --> 00:13:17,755 Is it the fish, or is it us? 401 00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:18,715 [ Snapping ] 402 00:13:18,715 --> 00:13:19,716 Oh, thank God. 403 00:13:19,716 --> 00:13:20,883 Hey. 404 00:13:20,883 --> 00:13:21,884 It was in your kitchen. 405 00:13:21,884 --> 00:13:22,844 [ Chuckles ] 406 00:13:23,886 --> 00:13:25,263 Set. 407 00:13:25,263 --> 00:13:27,473 The Playskool one... Yeah. 408 00:13:27,473 --> 00:13:29,392 ...in your classroom for the kids. Yes, yes. 409 00:13:29,392 --> 00:13:31,436 Why are you all sweaty? [ Staff murmurs ] 410 00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:33,021 Uh, because I keep the temperature in my classroom 411 00:13:33,021 --> 00:13:34,314 very warm, to sweat. Mm-hmm. 412 00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:35,523 You better turn it down! 413 00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:36,649 I will. 414 00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:37,567 Whose keys are you holding? 415 00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:42,780 Mine. So those keychains are your keychains? 416 00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:43,865 You like Cinderella? 417 00:13:44,741 --> 00:13:46,159 [ Staff "Ooh"s ] 418 00:13:46,159 --> 00:13:47,368 I like what she represents. 419 00:13:47,368 --> 00:13:49,787 How about that one that says J-A-N-I-N-E? 420 00:13:49,787 --> 00:13:50,997 Ava: Yeah, Gregory. 421 00:13:50,997 --> 00:13:53,249 Probably best for you and anyone else involved 422 00:13:53,249 --> 00:13:56,169 if you tell all of us why. 423 00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:56,961 Warren: Hmm. 424 00:13:59,005 --> 00:14:00,840 [ Sighs ] 425 00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:03,092 What?! Gregory! 426 00:14:03,092 --> 00:14:05,678 Oh, my God, you must have grabbed my house keys 427 00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:08,389 when I left them in the teachers' lounge, so -- 428 00:14:08,389 --> 00:14:11,476 And that would be why my car didn't start. Yes. 429 00:14:11,476 --> 00:14:12,894 Why'd you go to your car? Yeah. 430 00:14:12,894 --> 00:14:14,145 Janine: Jacob! 431 00:14:14,145 --> 00:14:16,230 Um, he went to his car 432 00:14:16,230 --> 00:14:18,733 because he left his keys in there. 433 00:14:18,733 --> 00:14:20,818 So how did he get in his car? 434 00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:22,195 Shut up. Give it up. 435 00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:24,280 I saw you two leave the other day in the same car. 436 00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:25,031 [ Staff "Ooh"s ] Well, y-you know, I... 437 00:14:25,031 --> 00:14:26,574 He was giving me a lift. 438 00:14:26,574 --> 00:14:27,742 Mm-hmm. That's all. 439 00:14:27,742 --> 00:14:29,869 Then you came back the next day together. 440 00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:32,830 Well, that's because I-I saw him walking and picked him up. 441 00:14:32,830 --> 00:14:33,915 Then why did I see him take a duffel bag 442 00:14:33,915 --> 00:14:35,583 out of your trunk? 443 00:14:35,583 --> 00:14:36,959 Okay. I take duffel bags with me everywhere all the time. 444 00:14:36,959 --> 00:14:38,795 Of course you do. 445 00:14:38,795 --> 00:14:40,546 Because everyone here knows 446 00:14:40,546 --> 00:14:41,589 that you two... 447 00:14:41,589 --> 00:14:43,007 [ Staff murmuring ] 448 00:14:43,007 --> 00:14:44,801 ...use the duffel bags 449 00:14:44,801 --> 00:14:46,803 to carry around the drugs you're selling. 450 00:14:46,803 --> 00:14:47,887 'Cause you're selling drugs! 451 00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:49,555 Doing what?! No, no, no! 452 00:14:49,555 --> 00:14:51,140 We are not selling drugs. We're having sex. 453 00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:53,643 Jacob: Yes! [ Staff exclaiming ] 454 00:14:53,643 --> 00:14:55,394 Mr. Johnson: This is worse than I thought. 455 00:14:55,394 --> 00:14:57,939 What people won't do for money. Mm, mm, mm. 456 00:14:57,939 --> 00:14:59,649 Man: Lord have mercy. Thanks. 457 00:14:59,649 --> 00:15:01,067 This is a damn shame. 458 00:15:03,319 --> 00:15:06,405 Janine: Maybe they didn't catch on. No, no, cat's out the bag. 459 00:15:06,405 --> 00:15:09,242 Right. But what if we coax the cat back into the bag? 460 00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:10,451 Because we can call another meeting 461 00:15:10,451 --> 00:15:12,537 and tell everyone that it was a prank, right? 462 00:15:13,788 --> 00:15:15,998 Janine, I-I've been trying not to worry, 463 00:15:15,998 --> 00:15:18,042 but... should I be worried? 464 00:15:19,293 --> 00:15:22,880 Are you not... into this, or...? 465 00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:24,215 Gregory, are you crazy? 466 00:15:25,716 --> 00:15:26,634 Of course I'm into it. What? 467 00:15:26,634 --> 00:15:28,219 Well, then, what's going on? 468 00:15:28,219 --> 00:15:29,387 I mean, I get wanting to keep people 469 00:15:29,387 --> 00:15:31,305 out of our business, which we can do, 470 00:15:31,305 --> 00:15:33,349 but I think everyone's rooting for us. 471 00:15:33,349 --> 00:15:34,559 And I'm not afraid of HR, if that's what the -- 472 00:15:34,559 --> 00:15:36,352 But maybe I am. 473 00:15:36,352 --> 00:15:37,520 [ Sighs ] 474 00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:39,272 Look. Okay. 475 00:15:39,272 --> 00:15:42,525 The last time I made something "official"... 476 00:15:44,360 --> 00:15:45,695 ...it didn't work out. 477 00:15:48,406 --> 00:15:49,615 And I... 478 00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:55,955 I really, really, really, really want this to work out. 479 00:15:58,207 --> 00:15:59,625 So, I guess I'm a little scared. 480 00:16:01,711 --> 00:16:03,212 [ Exhales deeply ] 481 00:16:04,255 --> 00:16:06,007 But we're not your last time. 482 00:16:07,758 --> 00:16:09,343 We're this time. 483 00:16:15,725 --> 00:16:17,143 Hey. Oh, yeah. 484 00:16:18,853 --> 00:16:20,229 [ Exhales sharply ] 485 00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:21,939 Let's tell the freaking world. 486 00:16:21,939 --> 00:16:23,149 I'm ready. [ Laughs ] 487 00:16:23,149 --> 00:16:24,317 Okay. Okay? 488 00:16:24,317 --> 00:16:25,818 Well, you just did... Yeah. 489 00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:27,111 ...when you told everybody that we had sex. 490 00:16:27,111 --> 00:16:28,571 Right. They know. Yeah. 491 00:16:28,571 --> 00:16:30,156 But, um, yeah. Let's make it official. 492 00:16:30,156 --> 00:16:31,115 Let's make it official. Let's make it official. 493 00:16:31,115 --> 00:16:32,533 Okay. Right, but, okay. 494 00:16:32,533 --> 00:16:34,619 Real quick -- This time, let's keep the sex part out. 495 00:16:34,619 --> 00:16:36,245 Just take the sex out. Don't need to say that. 496 00:16:36,245 --> 00:16:37,747 We don't need it. We don't need it. Don't say sex. 497 00:16:37,747 --> 00:16:40,166 Don't say sex, don't say sex, don't say sex, don't say sex. 498 00:16:40,166 --> 00:16:41,334 You could stop saying it right now. 499 00:16:41,334 --> 00:16:42,919 You're saying sex walking into a school. 500 00:16:42,919 --> 00:16:44,420 Yeah. Not the best -- You know? 501 00:16:44,420 --> 00:16:47,089 So he checked me out, but he took like a half hour. 502 00:16:47,089 --> 00:16:48,507 Would you please just sign out? 503 00:16:48,507 --> 00:16:50,968 Hi, there. I'm Miles Nathaniel. 504 00:16:51,969 --> 00:16:53,721 What are you, a Mormon? 505 00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:54,931 Look at this guy. 506 00:16:54,931 --> 00:16:56,599 Yeah. We're not interested. Get lost, pal. 507 00:16:56,599 --> 00:16:58,476 Yes, I'm saved. Thank you very much. 508 00:16:58,476 --> 00:16:59,644 And God bless you. 509 00:16:59,644 --> 00:17:01,229 Oh, no. I'm an attorney with the fine folks 510 00:17:01,229 --> 00:17:02,730 over at Girard Creek Golf Club. 511 00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:04,732 I was just perusing the neighborhood. 512 00:17:04,732 --> 00:17:06,234 Thought I'd pop in and say hi, 513 00:17:06,234 --> 00:17:07,193 seeing as how we're going to be neighbors. 514 00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:08,653 Oh, I know what this is about. 515 00:17:08,653 --> 00:17:09,779 We call the city, 516 00:17:09,779 --> 00:17:11,280 and now you want to dance, pretty boy? 517 00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:12,573 And I mean that as a compliment. 518 00:17:12,573 --> 00:17:15,117 Your skin is fantastic. You must be so rich. 519 00:17:15,117 --> 00:17:16,702 Yeah. So you heard that we heard 520 00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:19,163 that you're over there using non-union workers, 521 00:17:19,163 --> 00:17:21,082 and now you want to do damage control. 522 00:17:21,082 --> 00:17:22,625 Your little construction project has put 523 00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:24,210 quite a strain on our lives. 524 00:17:24,210 --> 00:17:25,920 We got a white child now. 525 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:28,381 You want to get his parents involved? 526 00:17:28,381 --> 00:17:30,216 Well, first of all, allow me to apologize 527 00:17:30,216 --> 00:17:32,552 for any inconveniences we may have caused. 528 00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:34,762 That's the opposite of what we intend to do 529 00:17:34,762 --> 00:17:35,888 for our community. 530 00:17:35,888 --> 00:17:38,015 We really believe the golf course can add 531 00:17:38,015 --> 00:17:39,267 a lot of value here. 532 00:17:39,267 --> 00:17:40,726 And what value would that be? 533 00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:42,562 Well, property value, for one thing. 534 00:17:42,562 --> 00:17:44,647 That will go up, way up. 535 00:17:44,647 --> 00:17:46,023 So, if you're a homeowner, 536 00:17:46,023 --> 00:17:47,692 perhaps one who's looking to sell 537 00:17:47,692 --> 00:17:50,486 and retire to, say, a-a tropical island... 538 00:17:50,486 --> 00:17:52,154 Or Arizona. 539 00:17:52,154 --> 00:17:53,906 I'm -- I'm partial to the desert myself. 540 00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:55,700 Yeah, well, that's gonna feel real good 541 00:17:55,700 --> 00:17:57,994 to the union workers not getting paid. 542 00:17:57,994 --> 00:17:59,870 Please, uh, forgive us for that oversight. 543 00:17:59,870 --> 00:18:01,330 We're amending that as we speak. 544 00:18:01,330 --> 00:18:03,374 We will be fully unionized by Monday. 545 00:18:03,374 --> 00:18:05,334 We would be unionized by Saturday, 546 00:18:05,334 --> 00:18:07,712 but, you know, unions. 547 00:18:07,712 --> 00:18:10,464 Uh, look, I know how hard it can be to work with the city, 548 00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:13,342 so if you have any future problems... 549 00:18:13,342 --> 00:18:14,802 Oh. 550 00:18:14,802 --> 00:18:15,886 What's that? 551 00:18:17,138 --> 00:18:18,514 That's a $500 gift card. 552 00:18:18,514 --> 00:18:19,682 Mm. 553 00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:21,225 I would have settled for $250, 554 00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:22,435 but this is classy. 555 00:18:22,435 --> 00:18:23,602 Barb, you can have half. 556 00:18:23,602 --> 00:18:25,021 Mm. But what about me? 557 00:18:25,021 --> 00:18:28,024 No, we are not on your team, okay? 558 00:18:28,024 --> 00:18:29,775 Golf doesn't even have teams. 559 00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:30,901 Sorry to interrupt. 560 00:18:30,901 --> 00:18:32,862 I-I just remembered, we have 15 new computers 561 00:18:32,862 --> 00:18:34,280 that we're looking to donate. 562 00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:36,782 Do you guys know anywhere that could use them? 563 00:18:36,782 --> 00:18:38,826 Well, we could -- we could use... 564 00:18:38,826 --> 00:18:40,077 No, wait. 565 00:18:40,077 --> 00:18:41,287 You know what? Let's make it 20. 566 00:18:41,287 --> 00:18:43,372 I think I saw a few extra lying around the office. 567 00:18:43,372 --> 00:18:45,416 Look, the golf course is going to happen 568 00:18:45,416 --> 00:18:46,584 no matter what. 569 00:18:46,584 --> 00:18:49,378 It can happen with computers or without them. 570 00:18:49,378 --> 00:18:51,088 Go ahead and shake the man's hand, Jacob, 571 00:18:51,088 --> 00:18:53,549 and recognize a blessing when you see one. 572 00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:56,093 Unh-unh, unh-unh, unh-unh, unh-unh, unh-unh, unh-unh. 573 00:18:56,093 --> 00:18:59,847 How about 25 computers and you quit messing with the water? 574 00:18:59,847 --> 00:19:01,849 Can't promise that, but... 575 00:19:01,849 --> 00:19:03,768 I can throw in an ergonomic chair or two. 576 00:19:06,103 --> 00:19:07,563 Oh! What y'all doing out there? 577 00:19:07,563 --> 00:19:09,190 Taking bribes. 578 00:19:09,190 --> 00:19:10,274 Alright. 579 00:19:10,274 --> 00:19:11,817 Just don't let Warren see. 580 00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:13,652 And get me something, too. 581 00:19:13,652 --> 00:19:14,862 Proud of y'all. 582 00:19:17,031 --> 00:19:18,574 So you're saying I can't sell the jewelry 583 00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:19,950 that the kids make on Etsy? 584 00:19:19,950 --> 00:19:21,369 No, I'm saying it's illegal. 585 00:19:21,369 --> 00:19:22,703 Child labor laws. 586 00:19:22,703 --> 00:19:25,039 But is it really work if they love what they do? 587 00:19:25,039 --> 00:19:26,040 [ Footsteps approaching ] 588 00:19:26,040 --> 00:19:27,249 [ Sighs ] 589 00:19:27,249 --> 00:19:28,334 Oh. 590 00:19:28,334 --> 00:19:29,418 Please have a seat. 591 00:19:31,337 --> 00:19:32,713 Okay, um, 592 00:19:32,713 --> 00:19:34,173 I guess I'll just jump right in. 593 00:19:34,173 --> 00:19:37,343 So, it all started when Gregory 594 00:19:37,343 --> 00:19:39,470 first got to the school and I gave him a tour. 595 00:19:39,470 --> 00:19:41,013 Um, I thought, 596 00:19:41,013 --> 00:19:43,682 "This is somebody I could get to know." 597 00:19:43,682 --> 00:19:47,019 And then I thought, "Maybe a friendship with this guy." 598 00:19:47,019 --> 00:19:50,189 And then I thought, "He's kind of cute, 599 00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:52,233 but he's my colleague." 600 00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:53,567 So, you know, at this point, 601 00:19:53,567 --> 00:19:55,611 you would think I would go forward in the story, 602 00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:58,364 but I actually probably need to go back a few years, 603 00:19:58,364 --> 00:20:01,700 um, to 11th grade, when I finally hit puberty. 604 00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:02,702 Warren: Hm! 605 00:20:02,702 --> 00:20:04,787 What is your relationship status? 606 00:20:04,787 --> 00:20:06,080 Uh... 607 00:20:07,248 --> 00:20:08,582 He's my boyfriend. 608 00:20:10,584 --> 00:20:11,919 And she's my girlfriend. 609 00:20:11,919 --> 00:20:13,003 Great. All done. 610 00:20:14,422 --> 00:20:15,506 That's it? 611 00:20:15,506 --> 00:20:16,674 Ava: That's it. 612 00:20:16,674 --> 00:20:18,008 I mean, there's no power imbalance here, 613 00:20:18,008 --> 00:20:19,260 so it's super easy. 614 00:20:19,260 --> 00:20:20,594 I just needed to record it. 615 00:20:20,594 --> 00:20:22,263 Good luck to the both of you. 616 00:20:23,347 --> 00:20:25,015 Hopefully she doesn't leave you like she left the district. 617 00:20:25,015 --> 00:20:27,101 [ Chuckles ] Uh-huh. 618 00:20:27,101 --> 00:20:29,979 I'm happy for y'all. Truly. 619 00:20:29,979 --> 00:20:31,772 I just wanted you guys to be smart about this. 620 00:20:31,772 --> 00:20:33,190 But, now you're both safe, 621 00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:35,234 and more importantly, so am I. 622 00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:36,569 Thank you, Ava. Thanks, Ava. 623 00:20:36,569 --> 00:20:37,987 You're welcome. 624 00:20:37,987 --> 00:20:39,363 Gregory... 625 00:20:39,363 --> 00:20:41,615 our situationship is over. 626 00:20:41,615 --> 00:20:43,367 Why -- Just let her have it. 627 00:20:43,367 --> 00:20:45,369 Yeah. Okay. 628 00:20:46,746 --> 00:20:47,496 [ Whispers ] Let's go. 629 00:20:49,957 --> 00:20:52,251 So, in conclusion, and as you can clearly see, 630 00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:53,586 he's a scumbag. 631 00:20:53,586 --> 00:20:55,504 That has to be an HR violation. 632 00:20:55,504 --> 00:20:57,047 Well, there's worse things I could call you, buddy. 633 00:20:57,047 --> 00:20:58,716 You two just need to grow up. 634 00:20:58,716 --> 00:21:00,217 You can leave now. 635 00:21:00,217 --> 00:21:02,303 [ Sighs ] 636 00:21:02,303 --> 00:21:03,888 Next. 637 00:21:03,888 --> 00:21:06,515 Okay. I don't even know why I'm here. 638 00:21:06,515 --> 00:21:07,850 Oh, she knows why we're here. 639 00:21:07,850 --> 00:21:09,101 This is an open-and-shut case. 640 00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:15,441 These are all the takeout menus I gave you. 641 00:21:15,441 --> 00:21:16,859 Uh-huh. 642 00:21:16,859 --> 00:21:18,402 And those were suggestions that we should go out to dinner. 643 00:21:18,402 --> 00:21:20,946 [ Scoffs ] I can read between the lines. You're sick. 644 00:21:20,946 --> 00:21:23,699 Write that down. Yeah, on it.