This place was falling apart the last time I was here.
Oh, one too many last night, cub, aye?
I read that humans evolved to forget what pain feels like
so that women don't remember the agony of childbirth.
I think it's the same with hangovers.
You reckon?
Ashley Hayes?
It's Ash.
About time you showed up.
I'm Sergeant Pettigrew.
Ah...
Police Constable Callum McCarthy.
My control room was broken into in the night
and my pasteuriser was jammed open.
300 litres of milk down the drain.
Quite literally.
Do you have any idea who... Ralph Morrow.
Ralph Morrow? Well, it doesn't take a genius to connect the dots.
We were gunning for the same business deal.
I won!
Well, I can assure you that...
I don't mean to be rude, but I've heard the spiel before.
I just need you to do your job.
That's all.
You get used to the smell.
I'm fine.
This was disconnected and...
Well...
So how much was the produce worth?
The milk? Yeah. Hundreds.
But it was gonna be turned into brie.
Oh, you make cheese here?
It's totally organic.
This was my first supermarket deal and that was worth thousands, but...
Oh, this spill makes hitting that deadline impossible
I'm gonna have a look outside ...
So, this used to be the Gibson farm?
Bought it about a year ago. Right.
Just, I haven't seen you about town.
I'm sorry, is there a problem here?
Have we done something to offend you?
Personally? No.
But I'm no stranger to prejudice from the police,
so trust needs to be earned.
I'll need the crime number for an insurance claim.
Sarge?
Does this belong to you? No.
No? Let's get it bagged up.
Yeah.
I'll get you the crime number.
And, yeah, trust does have to be earned.
So...
..give us a chance to earn it?
She reminds me of you, before you've had a coffee.
Ha! She's nothing like me.
Happy birthday, woman.
You don't look a day over 40.
KNOCK ON DOOR
Ten points for being the first.
Ooh! Who's getting married?
Postie dropped your mail in my letterbox.
Only three things certain in life - birth, death and bills.
Do you know what day it is today?
Of course I do.
It's Thursday.
It's like watching Jamie Oliver on steroids.
Got vegan sausages for Niamh, the lot.
Need youse fed and watered today if we're gonna pull this off!
Are you sure this is a good idea?
Siobhan, my Ma's gonna be so distracted
thinking we've all forgotten her birthday,
that a surprise party in The Commodore
won't even cross her mind.
It's been a while since you told me you want a divorce
and we've barely spoken about it.
Al and I kissed.
It should never have happened.
I feel terrible about it. Al does too.
Sure, I told him I'm fine with it.
But he says you've been avoiding him. Well, I haven't.
Right, Shay! Niamh! Your breakfast's ready!
So I guess we're here because you're trying to avoid Finn?
No.
We're in here for privacy.
I need to know if you've heard anything from Jake?
Nada.
I mean, he was blackmailing us.
I doubt even Jake has the guts to come crawling back.
It's been a good two weeks now.
Looks like we're in the clear.
And I promise you I will pay back every penny
to Siobhan's cancer charity.
Morning. Morning.
I didn't know you had such a good voice, Callum.
You sounded just like Ed Sheeran...
..with laryngitis.
'Bye.
See ya.
So, did you manage to woo anyone with that voice of yours last night?
Only got to sing the one song.
Some guy was mic-hogging all night.
Let's run a check on Ralph Morrow.
Criminal damage up at the Gibson farm.
It's been taken over by Ash Hayes.
Her and Marlene got off on the wrong foot.
She thinks we're a bunch of idiots
who can't get to the bottom of some spilt milk!
I'm with Mum on this one, Dad.
This surprise party has disaster written all over it.
Right, everybody stop worrying. We've got this under control.
DOOR OPENS
Ooh, looking good, Granny!
Am I?
And what's the occasion?
There's a bit of potato bread there if you want it, Ma?
No, I've lost my appetite.
I was just dropping back your dish.
Thanks.
Well...
..if there's nothing else, I'll be off then,
shall I?
All right, Ma.
DOOR CLOSES
Told you!
Doesn't even suspect a thing.
I even got Barry to intercept the postman.
LAUGHTER
Thanks for coming in, Mr Morrow. Ralph.
And I was going to anyway.
Ash Hayes has been fly-tipping toxic waste on my farm.
What makes you think it's Ash?
My neighbour saw her fancy jeep casing my farm the night
the waste was dumped.
Did you know there was a break-in on Ash's farm last night?
Her milk tank was opened and the produce relating to the
business deal you two were in competition for was lost.
I was with Trevor Lecky all night.
Trevor Lecky?
He owns PD Waste Collections.
He come over to assess the waste that Ash had dumped on my farm.
We ended up having a few drinks.
Ash is trying to frame me.
She's realised she can't meet the demand.
She opened her own tank.
And why would she do that?
To collect on the insurance!
She's over-committed and she's trying to use me as a scapegoat!
Ashley Hayes from Dungannon, criminal damage.
Convicted just before moving to Port Devine.
So she moved over here for a clean start with a dirty record?
Well, there's a familiar tale.
Fly-tipping is brutal on the environment.
Yeah, and feuds between farmers can get ugly.
Do you remember a couple of years ago
53 pigs were let out on Port Devine High Street?
It was chaos! LAUGHTER
Nicole!
I'm not here.
What?
Where's my baby-mummy? We're doing the test today.
I'm sure she must've been talking about it nonstop.
She's... She, eh...
She's... She's on a call.
Well, I hope it's not dangerous.
She's got more than herself to think of now.
Well, special breakfast for the surrogate.
Ah! Marlene's tummy only.
You know the test only takes a few... I know how long it takes!
What's this?
Urgh...
That's 3.49 please, Concepta.
Even on a day like today?
Sure, we can do you a wee discount.
Aye, call it three quid?
Don't be silly, why should I get any get special treatment?
There's nothing special about me...
is there?
Well, sure, why don't you have it for free? A wee treat.
Just because...
Because ...
Because we like you.
You're sure?
Absolutely! Yeah.
Have you noticed, like...
..an atmosphere with Finn and Al?
I wouldn't get involved, cub.
Whatever it is, they're old friends, they'll sort it out.
Let's take this one gently. I'll do the talking, all right?
Locked him up and thrown away the key, then?
Er, we have spoken to Ralph and confirmed that he
was nowhere near your farm last night.
Oh, let me guess, a mate's covering for him?
Eh, we can't comment on that.
Well, you know the way out.
We also need to inform you that Ralph has made
a counter-allegation of harassment,
claiming that you have been fly-tipping waste on his land.
Well, Ralph's a liar.
You wouldn't mind showing us where you store your waste?
Do you have a search warrant? No.
But show us and we can put this allegation to bed
and get back to investigating your case.
These barrels have the same markings as the waste tipped on Ralph's farm.
But it's not me tipping it!
Can I ask where you were two nights ago?
Here.
Can anyone verify that?
Do you see anyone else?
Ashley Hayes, I'm arresting you for harassment.
You do not have to say anything but it may harm your defence
if you do not mention when questioned
something you later rely on in court.
Anything you do say may be given in evidence.
These could have come from anywhere.
A witness saw you near Ralph's farm on the night the waste was dumped.
The markings on these barrels match your waste
and you have no-one to corroborate your whereabouts.
You know, before I moved here,
I was being harassed and your lot wouldn't do anything about it.
We know you have a record for criminal damage.
You don't know anything about me.
And you don't know anything about us
but you seem to have our cards marked.
Do you just use the one waste collection company?
The one guy, more like.
Trevor.
He comes every time and...
And what?
He keeps coming onto me.
And he makes these...jokes.
What kind of jokes?
You could say homophobic, but the way he does it.
I dunno...
You're gay?
Do you have a problem with that? No.
No, we can't be homophobic.
Marlene's gay.
Look,
between Trevor's jokes and his impersonation of 'The King',
he's doing my head in.
The King?
He's some kind of singer, I think.
Is there anything at all you can give us that proves
you weren't near Ralph's farm on the night the waste was dumped?
Anything like a petrol receipt or a bar bill?
I was with someone...
..but she isn't 'out' yet.
Ash,
you can trust us to keep information confidential.
I'm sorry, but...
..I've principles when it comes to this stuff.
Is this the same Trevor Lecky?
Yeah.
This is the guy who was hogging the mic last night at karaoke.
Hello, hello.
Trevor Lecky?
Come on, on in.
The King.
Not a woman in the world wouldn't fall at his feet.
I don't want to brag,
but I would consider myself the best impersonator in Port Devine.
That's ...
That's quite the claim.
Can we ask where you were last night?
I went over to assess the waste on Ralph's farm.
Ralph Morrow? Aye.
We got drinking and I woke up on his sofa this morning
with my shoes on,
but no socks!
You two friends, aye?
Well,
I feel sorry for him,
the fly-tipping's driving the poor fella mad
and he's right, you know.
He's right about what?
The waste is coming from that woman Ash's farm.
There must be a lot of farmers round here who use those chemicals?
True, but she should be generating more waste
than we're collecting from her. What do you mean?
I've been in this game a long while and her numbers don't stack up.
BALLOON POPS
Would you stop that, please?
Do you have a boyfriend, Taylor?
No.
Nothing serious.
Why?
Just...good to know.
Isn't it, Shay?
MOBILES PHONE BUZZES
Everything OK?
Yeah.
I've got to go.
I'll see you tonight?
Definitely.
'Bye.
Hi, Concepta!
Concepta!
Are Shay and Niamh in there? I wanted a wee word.
Ah, you've just missed them.
And I'm actually on my way to a meeting about becoming partner
at the GP practice.
I'm a in a wee bit of a rush.
You must have straightened things out with Finn, then?
Ah, it's work in progress.
Talking to your son's like trying to get blood from a stone.
Well, you can hardly blame him for being distant.
You were kissing his best man two weeks ago.
Give him time.
Really mum? Al?
Yeah, I know Trevor.
He comes in once a month for karaoke.
Aha, there she is.
Police Sergeant Pettigrew, I've been looking for you all morning.
Will we, eh, go grab the test?
They're working, sweetheart.
Let's stick to the plan, eh?
We'll do it together after work, yeah?
Why don't you make them a coffee?
Because caffeine's really bad for the baby.
What time did Trevor leave the karaoke?
Ah, he was steaming drunk.
I stopped serving him around 11.
So Trevor's lied, he wasn't with Ralph.
Hot chocolate?
Meet you back at the station, cub.
Right you are.
Yes, gents? I'll have this and then we'll do the pregnancy test.
Look, I've tried calling you several times, but you never pick up.
Well, I am busy.
Your mum let it slip.
My mum?
Look she didn't realise the kids were in the house.
Hang on a second!
How does my mother know about you and Al?
She saw us kiss.
Look, she didn't tell you because she knows it didn't mean anything.
Right, so everybody is talking about this behind my back?
My mum, the kids, Al?
I have tried speaking to you, but you're shutting me out.
I've apologised, Finn,
but I can't turn back the clock.
I can't go on like this.
So, what now?
I'm gonna hire a divorce lawyer
and when you get the paperwork through, you'll be free of me.
Don't make a fuss, Clint. I'm fine.
It can't have been easy going through that thing.
I...
I'm really proud of you for wanting to help your friend,
but maybe it's a sign?
Of what?
Well...
you're not pregnant
and now you have an escape route.
Look, maybe you don't agree with this surrogacy,
but Nicole is my best mate
and I made her a promise.
And I've principles about this kind of stuff.
Is it true?
You're divorcing mum?
She told you that?
Ach, love...
Me and your mum have been separated for over a year.
It's a long time coming.
So, it's got nothing to do with the fact that mum and Al kissed?
Mum and Al are adults.
Whatever they do is their business.
You two are melters! It was just a kiss!
If you love her, you could at least put up a bit of a fight.
I did go over to Ralph's to assess the waste
but I didn't stay quite as long as I made out.
Did Ralph ask you to cover for him
because he caused criminal damage on Ash's farm?
He just said, "If anyone asks, say you were with me last night."
I'd no idea there had been a break-in.
I was hungover and wasn't thinking straight.
Where did you go after The Commodore?
Home. I went straight home ...
Can anyone verify that?
Yes. Roger.
Roger.
My spaniel.
So...
Ash said you kept coming on to her, even after she told you she was gay.
Did you lie about Ralph as revenge?
Ash is just playing hard to get.
Deep down I know she likes me.
No, Trevor.
Ash is gay.
So, what about gay people? You got a problem with us?
I'm not homophobic, if that's what you think!?
I was just trying my luck.
That's not a crime, is it?
Ralph is still insisting that it was Ash.
And we can prove that's not true
if Ash would let us know who she was with.
Right, I'll spread the word around the local farmers,
make sure they contact us directly if they spot anyone fly-tipping.
KNOCK ON DOOR
Tell me that one of youse has seen Concepta?
No. No.
Nicole says that she saw Concepta getting on a bus to
Belfast at lunchtime.
Well, I'll ring her. No, no, no, her phone's off.
And then Dot Harper rang to tell me
that Concepta has been bending her ear all afternoon,
so how's she at Dot's and in Belfast at the same time?
Barry, when you've driven Ash into town, did you see her with anyone?
Ash? Ash Hayes? Uh-huh.
Er, only once.
Er, with Mrs Emerson's daughter, Aoife.
Right.
Oh, um, was Nicole OK after I left?
Well, she was certainly putting on a brave face.
Right.
I spoke to the sergeant in Dungannon.
I know about your ex.
And here, look, I understand why you don't trust the police.
I've always believed in being proud of who you are.
I pushed the girl I was seeing to come out...
..but her family turned on her.
Her dad kicked her out.
And her brother,
well, he blamed me.
None of that is your fault.
He started harassing me, following me.
It went on for months.
I tried the police.
Yeah, but without evidence there's only so much we can do.
Here.
Thanks.
One day I saw his car parked in town
and I guess I just snapped because next thing I knew I'd keyed it.
Right down the side.
It turns out there was, like, eight cameras pointed right at me.
This cheese is really good. Mm.
Ash...
..were you with Aoife Emerson the night the waste was dumped?
It's just, I'd like to check with her
and I promise I will be as discreet as possible.
I'll let Aoife know you're coming.
Thank you.
I'm coming, Jake. Two minutes.
Ash was with Aoife when the waste was dumped.
Well, that rules Ash out of the fly-tipping.
That was Dessie Brankin.
He says there's a truck on his farm dumping waste, right now.
I just checked the licence plate
and it's registered to PD Waste Collections!
OK, let's go! Let's go! Right.
SIREN WAILS
TRUCK BEEPS
Hey!
Stop!
Trevor Lecky,
I'm arresting you for criminal damage on Ashley Hayes' farm
and for fraud by false representation.
You don't have to say anything, but it may harm your defence
if you don't mention when questioned
something you later rely on in court.
Anything you do say may be used as evidence.
So you've been collecting waste from one farm and dumping it on another.
I only did enough to pay off the interest to Donnie Kesson.
He's a loan shark from Belfast.
Nasty.
Nasty piece of work.
I borrowed money to buy the yard down here.
But why fly-tip on Ralph's land?
He thought you were friends.
Ash was new to town too
and their horns were locked over the business deal.
I knew Ralph would blame her.
Why should we believe that you're not behind
the criminal damage on Ash's farm?
Because, honestly, I've nothing against Ash.
Ralph called me at 6am.
Asked me to cover for him.
I only agreed because I felt guilt.
Felt guilty for using him.
He called you at 6am?
Yeah.
Woke me up before my alarm.
Trevor told us you called him this morning at 6am and asked him
to cover for you, is that right?
I told you.
I knew she was trying to frame me!
Yeah, but Ash didn't discover the break-in until after 7am.
Maybe it was later than six, I can't remember the exact time.
It was 6:03am, according to Trevor's phone records.
We found this at the crime scene.
Now, we're gonna search your house and if we find any clothing
matching this material, forensics will link them.
What about my harassment case?
What about the toxic waste that she dumped on my farm?
That could have made my animals sick!?
Yeah, that wasn't Ash.
It was Trevor.
Sometimes people just aren't who you think they are.
It was me.
I opened the tank.
Well, I'd be lying if I said Aoife was happy to see me,
but look, no-one will know until she's ready to tell them,
you have my word.
Ralph's been charged with criminal damage to your property
and Trevor for fly-tipping, so...
You went to a lot of trouble to gain my trust.
Well, now you have it.
No need to key any more cars then?
So long as everyone keeps behaving.
Of course.
I'll see you.
Do you, like, LIKE her?
Just because we're both gay doesn't mean we fancy each other, Callum.
Concepta?
LIGHT SWITCH CLICKS
Surprised to see me?
SHE LAUGHS
You scared the life out of me.
You took your time finding me.
The bus to Belfast? Dot Harper?
You had me ringing round all of Port Devine.
Serves you right.
You were all trying to trick me
so I thought I'd play a wee trick of my own.
Get the party started.
You do know that your wee Niamh is on her way to Belfast,
on her own, looking for you?
And all this while, you knew that everybody was trying to
organise a surprise party in your honour.
By lying to me.
Because they love you.
You silly aul goat.
See the older I get in life, the more I understand what's important
and it's certainly not always being in control.
It's learning how to let go.
I was just...
I was just watching the boats.
Watching the boats?
I'm not an idiot, you know.
And I might not show it, but...
..I'm upset too.
I was just so excited.
I know.
But look,
we have a month to reset, get our heads together...
..and then we can try again. Yeah?
There you are, love,
I've been looking everywhere for you.
Ach, love.
I'm OK.
We're just talking.
She's gone to Belfast.
What?!
Surprise!
She heard you twos eejits talking in the kitchen this morning.
Do you think I was born yesterday?
What are you like?
Well, listen, Ma,
surprise or no surprise...
..this is for your birthday
and also for all the support you've shown Siobhan during her treatment.
Yeah, that's something neither of us will forget.
Thank you, Concepta, and happy birthday!
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
Ralph and Ash are outside, I think they're arguing.
What?!
Are you OK?
Yeah, Ralph was just telling me that he was led to believe
by a friend that it was me dumping the waste on his farm.
That's true. He was.
But part of me wanted to believe it.
Jealousy about the deal, maybe even a little prejudice.
I'm sorry.
I'll take my punishment,
but I want to make sure you get on the shelves
of that supermarket on time.
I can pull a few favours.
If you'd like the help, that is?
No strings attached.
Sounds like a fair deal to me.
If he follows through, I'll put in a good word for him at court.
What're you doing in town?
I'll just...
I'll get the drinks in.
So, em, what are you doing in town?
Thought I'd see what I've been missing.
Cheers. You're welcome.
Marlene gave me the bad news.
I'm really sorry the pregnancy didn't work out.
Ah, thanks mate.
I tell you, your ma's a piece of work.
She got a free frappuccino off me earlier on
because I felt so guilty about pretending to forget her birthday.
You all right?
Yeah.
I don't know how you stand it.
Him getting on with Siobhan like that.
Siobhan is free to do what she likes and so is Al.
Call me old-fashioned, but what about the mate's code?
Clint, any chance of you working the bar and not drinking it?
See ya.
Well, congrats!
You're back with Jake?
What?
I saw you on the back of his big motorbike earlier.
Were you following me?
Thought you didn't have a boyfriend?
Don't stalk me, you creepy perv!
Shay?
Hey!
Jake?
He's caught up with some loan shark from Belfast,
Donnie something or other.
Donnie Kesson?
What's that got to do with you?
Jake's in over his head with Donnie
and he's trying to use us as leverage.
He says Donnie wants information from the police database
or he's gonna hand over the evidence from the ATM theft to the police.
Have you any idea how much trouble I'd get in if I did that?
He's desperate. I saw it in his eyes.
What are we gonna do?
Finn?
Siobhan's in there worried about you.
Really?
Didn't look too worried to me.
You know what, mate? I'm going to be honest with you.
I think you're overreacting to this whole thing.
Is that right now?
You're getting divorced over a stupid kiss.
I've apologised, all right? Siobhan's apologised.
Why don't you just talk to her?
What just go in there, tell her everything's going to be OK,
play happy families? Does that sound good to you?
Talk to her, all right?
Talk to me. Scream! Shout!
Hit me if you want to, but do something
because I am sick of you pretending that everything's fine!
SHAY!
Shay! Shay stop!
Come on, the cake's about to be cut here.
You are pathetic! You really are, just, just letting him
steal mum from right under your nose!
OK, that is enough, son!
I can smell the booze off your breath.
You go home and you sober up!
It is the PE teacher all over again.
Shay?
Oh, no, except this time, it's your best mate!
Everybody just take a breath.
Maybe you like it?
Maybe you're just happy letting mum sleep with whoever she wants?
SHAY!
Go on! Do it! Do it!
Finn..
Al, I think you've done enough, mate.
Hey.
Talk to me, Finn.
What is wrong with me?
What's wrong with me?