1 00:00:02,001 --> 00:00:06,048 ♪ upbeat theme playing ♪ 2 00:00:06,048 --> 00:00:08,926 ♪ Ba-ba-ba-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba ♪ 3 00:00:08,926 --> 00:00:12,471 ♪ Ba-ba, da-da-da-da-da-da da-da-da ♪ 4 00:00:17,059 --> 00:00:18,352 Okay, I have a brilliant plan 5 00:00:18,352 --> 00:00:20,395 that I would like to brag to you all about. 6 00:00:20,395 --> 00:00:21,813 Tonight, 7 00:00:21,813 --> 00:00:23,607 I will be reintroducing my parents 8 00:00:23,607 --> 00:00:25,651 and performing a parent trap! 9 00:00:25,651 --> 00:00:27,986 Wait, you're trying to get Rocker Mom with Hot Dog Dad? 10 00:00:27,986 --> 00:00:30,614 Yeah. I think that they'd be really good together. 11 00:00:30,614 --> 00:00:32,741 She's the chili powder, he's a jar of mayo, 12 00:00:32,741 --> 00:00:34,117 and together, they're like a-- 13 00:00:34,117 --> 00:00:36,870 - An aioli. Tight! - Yes! 14 00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:39,540 Soph, take it from Jesse and me. 15 00:00:39,540 --> 00:00:42,751 You know, parent traps are fun to watch when Lindsay Lohans do them, 16 00:00:42,751 --> 00:00:45,295 but, in reality, they only end in pain. 17 00:00:46,129 --> 00:00:49,299 - Nobody's gonna know. - How would they know? 18 00:00:49,299 --> 00:00:50,759 They knew. 19 00:00:51,426 --> 00:00:54,471 Well, uh, your plan didn't work because you guys were dumb babies. 20 00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:55,848 But my plan is foolproof 21 00:00:55,848 --> 00:00:58,267 because I got us a sexy dinner rez, 22 00:00:58,267 --> 00:01:00,352 and I requested a hot but forgettable waiter. 23 00:01:00,352 --> 00:01:03,814 You know, just to add, like, an air of nondescript lust to the evening. 24 00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:07,901 Also, I got a harpist on Yelp whose name is Harper. I know! 25 00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:10,612 And finally, I'll be bringing Val for moral support. 26 00:01:10,612 --> 00:01:12,489 You are? Oh, yes! 27 00:01:12,489 --> 00:01:15,367 Finally, I'm getting a free parent dinner from this friendship. 28 00:01:15,367 --> 00:01:17,703 I'll be all, "No, no, no. I'll pay for mine." 29 00:01:17,703 --> 00:01:20,080 And they'll be all, "No, it's our pleasure." 30 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:23,500 And I'll be all, "[scoffs] Oh, my God, thank you." 31 00:01:24,001 --> 00:01:26,128 And while you're feasting on free calamari, 32 00:01:26,128 --> 00:01:28,213 my parents will be falling for each other. 33 00:01:28,213 --> 00:01:29,715 And then, we'll finally get to do everything 34 00:01:29,715 --> 00:01:32,092 on my "I finally have a family" bucket list. Like... 35 00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:35,095 Like apple picking, and three-seat bicycle riding, and... 36 00:01:35,679 --> 00:01:37,389 Oh, my God, family portraits at JCPenney. 37 00:01:37,389 --> 00:01:39,183 I've already been practicing my pose. 38 00:01:42,895 --> 00:01:45,606 ♪ Putting up a sheet wall, wall ♪ 39 00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:48,817 ♪ Wall, I hope it doesn't fall, fall, fall-- ♪ 40 00:01:48,817 --> 00:01:50,319 I wish I was dead! 41 00:01:52,946 --> 00:01:54,573 Sid. What are you doing here? 42 00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:57,868 I can't do my Ariana Grande impression for you right now. 43 00:01:59,369 --> 00:02:00,871 Okay, fine. 44 00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:02,623 Yuhhh. 45 00:02:02,623 --> 00:02:05,250 Wow. I mean, it's really like she's in the room. 46 00:02:06,710 --> 00:02:07,961 But uh... 47 00:02:08,504 --> 00:02:11,340 I'm not here for that. - Oh? What's up? 48 00:02:11,715 --> 00:02:14,134 Uh, well, nothing. Just, um... 49 00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:17,137 Uh... - Sid! 50 00:02:17,596 --> 00:02:21,183 Do you wanna confide in me about something that's been weighing on you? 51 00:02:21,683 --> 00:02:24,144 That's cute as hell! 52 00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:26,480 Okay, fine. It's Jesse. 53 00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:29,066 Like, I need him to move out, and he just doesn't get it. 54 00:02:29,066 --> 00:02:32,444 ♪ It's just... a little brush! ♪ 55 00:02:33,904 --> 00:02:35,781 - Mm, hey, um. - Yeah? 56 00:02:35,781 --> 00:02:39,493 So, Hannah's moving back to New York in a couple of weeks, 57 00:02:39,493 --> 00:02:42,996 and we should really talk about living arrangements. 58 00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,540 Oh. Um... 59 00:02:44,540 --> 00:02:46,917 Okay, but won't she just sleep in your room? 60 00:02:46,917 --> 00:02:50,170 I know what you're thinking. I need to be direct. 61 00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:51,421 Actually... 62 00:02:51,922 --> 00:02:53,632 direct doesn't always work either. 63 00:02:54,550 --> 00:02:57,052 Charlie? I'm an independent woman, 64 00:02:57,052 --> 00:02:58,679 and I wanna live by myself. 65 00:02:58,679 --> 00:03:00,722 A fun improv game! Okay, I'm in. 66 00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:02,850 I am a left-leaning firefighter. 67 00:03:02,850 --> 00:03:04,309 I have a medium income, 68 00:03:04,309 --> 00:03:06,520 and I want to live in an underwater castle. 69 00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:09,815 Wait, you're trying to ditch Charlie, too? 70 00:03:09,815 --> 00:03:11,650 I'm pulling in six figures, girl! 71 00:03:11,650 --> 00:03:13,569 I can't be sleeping behind a sheet wall! 72 00:03:13,569 --> 00:03:15,779 - Well, I thought that was Charlie's bed. - We rotate. 73 00:03:15,779 --> 00:03:17,531 - Dark. - I know. 74 00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:21,660 But, I can't bear to break Charlie's little heart. 75 00:03:21,660 --> 00:03:23,078 He's just a boy, after all. 76 00:03:23,078 --> 00:03:25,581 I know! And Jesse can't be by himself! 77 00:03:25,581 --> 00:03:27,541 I have to Heimlich the dude twice a week! 78 00:03:34,965 --> 00:03:36,550 Wait a second. 79 00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:38,969 Parents aren't the only people who can be trapped. 80 00:03:38,969 --> 00:03:42,389 What if we roommate trap Charlie and Jesse? 81 00:03:42,389 --> 00:03:45,475 Convince those sweet idiots that they wanna live with each other, 82 00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:46,894 and that it's their idea? 83 00:03:47,811 --> 00:03:50,314 Color me intrigued. But how? 84 00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:52,733 Color Me Mine! 85 00:03:52,733 --> 00:03:55,360 Oh, no, no, no. Not a good look on Jesse. 86 00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:58,071 These are not what the colors looked like wet! 87 00:03:58,071 --> 00:04:00,449 Now it just looks silly! 88 00:04:00,449 --> 00:04:02,951 They put him on a "No Paint" list. 89 00:04:02,951 --> 00:04:05,245 Okay, okay, okay. Think. 90 00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:08,999 How do we get two grown men to bond? 91 00:04:10,876 --> 00:04:12,628 Sleepover! 92 00:04:12,628 --> 00:04:14,087 ♪ light harp music playing ♪ 93 00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:15,506 Hi. 94 00:04:15,506 --> 00:04:17,716 I'll be your server tonight. - Absolutely not. 95 00:04:17,716 --> 00:04:19,009 Distractingly hot. 96 00:04:19,968 --> 00:04:21,762 I asked for hot, but forgettable. 97 00:04:22,763 --> 00:04:24,890 - Got it. I'll go grab Greg. - Wait, wait, wait. 98 00:04:29,186 --> 00:04:31,188 Call me! Bye... 99 00:04:33,190 --> 00:04:34,566 Oh God. 100 00:04:34,566 --> 00:04:36,193 I am so nervous. 101 00:04:36,193 --> 00:04:37,694 What if my dad is awkward? 102 00:04:37,694 --> 00:04:39,321 How am I gonna make him comfortable? 103 00:04:40,989 --> 00:04:43,075 Do you know any songs about the Mets? 104 00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:45,786 I went to Juilliard. 105 00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:48,080 Uh, Soph? 106 00:04:48,080 --> 00:04:49,748 I don't think you have anything to worry about. 107 00:04:49,748 --> 00:04:51,083 Huh? 108 00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:57,881 Oh, my God. Let's do our calming mantra. - I got you. 109 00:04:57,881 --> 00:05:01,593 Calming mantra... Calming mantra... Calming mantra? 110 00:05:06,598 --> 00:05:08,016 ZZ Top? 111 00:05:08,517 --> 00:05:10,102 What are you doing next to 112 00:05:10,102 --> 00:05:12,104 Lumineers, comma, The? 113 00:05:15,357 --> 00:05:16,733 Hey, uh, 114 00:05:16,733 --> 00:05:18,652 is it cool if I crash here this evening? 115 00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:21,947 Ellen claims she's having something called a "super-period," and, um... 116 00:05:23,198 --> 00:05:24,741 I didn't want to ask any questions. 117 00:05:24,741 --> 00:05:26,034 She told me. 118 00:05:26,034 --> 00:05:27,619 Felt like an unnecessary phone call, 119 00:05:27,619 --> 00:05:30,706 but also a cool one because he for she. 120 00:05:31,456 --> 00:05:34,251 Anyway, uh, Sid's working late tonight, so it's just the two of us. 121 00:05:34,251 --> 00:05:36,753 I'm gonna get back to alphabetizing my records. 122 00:05:37,254 --> 00:05:39,756 You really can't beat the warmth of analog, you know? 123 00:05:40,757 --> 00:05:41,884 God, I sound cool. 124 00:05:42,467 --> 00:05:46,013 Right. I am gonna hunker down with Reese's Book of the Month, 125 00:05:46,013 --> 00:05:48,515 so until we meet again. 126 00:05:49,975 --> 00:05:53,937 Will Sheila find love with the war hero who's caring for her sick dog? 127 00:05:53,937 --> 00:05:56,481 You are a real page-turner, Vet Vet. 128 00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:07,784 I can't believe Charlie's just reading alone. 129 00:06:07,784 --> 00:06:09,620 That is not how we do it at our house. 130 00:06:13,749 --> 00:06:14,791 Turn. 131 00:06:17,920 --> 00:06:19,922 Okay. Well, this is going horribly! 132 00:06:19,922 --> 00:06:21,924 We need them to bond, like, stat! 133 00:06:21,924 --> 00:06:23,300 Uh-- Oh! 134 00:06:23,300 --> 00:06:25,427 We could leave a baby on their doorstep. 135 00:06:25,427 --> 00:06:26,678 You know, force them to co-parent. 136 00:06:26,678 --> 00:06:28,514 How are we gonna get our hands on a baby? 137 00:06:28,514 --> 00:06:30,474 I could get a baby. 138 00:06:34,019 --> 00:06:35,145 Hi, girls! 139 00:06:36,146 --> 00:06:38,607 Wow! What a cute spot. 140 00:06:38,607 --> 00:06:39,608 Mwah! 141 00:06:40,025 --> 00:06:43,153 So, uh, is your dad here yet? 142 00:06:43,153 --> 00:06:44,947 Excited to meet him! 143 00:06:44,947 --> 00:06:47,282 Nope. Not yet. 144 00:06:47,282 --> 00:06:49,618 Must have gotten stuck in some traffic. 145 00:06:49,618 --> 00:06:51,870 Coming from Smoochville. 146 00:06:53,247 --> 00:06:55,082 Hello, stranger! 147 00:06:56,083 --> 00:06:58,627 You must be Nick. - And you must be Lori. 148 00:06:58,627 --> 00:07:01,171 Wow. It's crazy to see you after all these years. 149 00:07:01,171 --> 00:07:02,548 Alright, cut the act, losers. 150 00:07:02,548 --> 00:07:04,258 We just saw you Frenching. With your tongues. 151 00:07:04,258 --> 00:07:05,968 - All Frenching is with tongue-- - Not now. 152 00:07:05,968 --> 00:07:08,846 Damn it, Lori. I knew we shouldn't have made out so close to our destination. 153 00:07:08,846 --> 00:07:11,890 Well, what's a girl to do when you rock those corduroys? 154 00:07:11,890 --> 00:07:13,767 Yeah, probably shouldn't have worn my butt huggers. 155 00:07:13,767 --> 00:07:15,686 When did this start? 156 00:07:16,270 --> 00:07:18,438 A few weeks ago. 157 00:07:18,438 --> 00:07:20,566 You were spending all this time together, 158 00:07:20,566 --> 00:07:22,442 and I wanted to make sure he was a good guy. 159 00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:24,945 So, I went to his shop. 160 00:07:26,572 --> 00:07:27,531 Um... 161 00:07:27,531 --> 00:07:30,701 I'm sorry to interrupt your 9 AM chili dog, 162 00:07:30,701 --> 00:07:32,870 but I have to ask. 163 00:07:32,870 --> 00:07:33,871 Do I know you? 164 00:07:34,663 --> 00:07:35,914 Yes. 165 00:07:35,914 --> 00:07:37,499 In the biblical sense. 166 00:07:37,499 --> 00:07:40,127 And then, we got to talking. 167 00:07:42,671 --> 00:07:46,008 It was so nice to catch up after all these years. 168 00:07:48,302 --> 00:07:50,596 And then, things started to get hot and heavy. 169 00:07:50,596 --> 00:07:53,390 Careful. That's hot. - And heavy! 170 00:07:56,852 --> 00:07:58,395 Mm-hmm. 171 00:07:58,395 --> 00:08:01,648 I guess we've been on... five or six dates since then. 172 00:08:01,648 --> 00:08:04,943 - And one salty weekend by the sea. - Oh yes. 173 00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:07,779 Oh, my God! 174 00:08:07,779 --> 00:08:10,782 They're together, and you didn't even have to trap them. 175 00:08:10,782 --> 00:08:14,328 Now, we can focus on getting hot waiter to snap me like a glow stick. 176 00:08:16,163 --> 00:08:19,666 ♪ whimsical music playing ♪ 177 00:08:30,928 --> 00:08:33,597 - What the hell is this? - This had better be good, Jesse. 178 00:08:33,597 --> 00:08:36,725 The vet vet is having a war flashback mid-neuter. 179 00:08:37,726 --> 00:08:39,269 Say It Or Do It: 180 00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:42,773 The Electronic Male Bonding Game for Men. 181 00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:45,526 "Barstool Sports calls it, 182 00:08:45,526 --> 00:08:47,653 'Not your Mama's truth or dare.'" 183 00:08:47,653 --> 00:08:50,989 "Featuring the voice of Rob Gronkowski." 184 00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:53,116 - Where did this come from? - No idea. 185 00:08:53,116 --> 00:08:56,161 I bet Sid did another Tanqueray and Tar-jay. 186 00:08:59,414 --> 00:09:01,500 Say it! 187 00:09:01,500 --> 00:09:04,336 When's the last time you cried, Bro-chacho? 188 00:09:06,547 --> 00:09:08,423 Well, answer Mr. Gronk. 189 00:09:08,423 --> 00:09:09,675 Uh, uh... 190 00:09:09,675 --> 00:09:11,635 three weeks ago, I guess, 191 00:09:11,635 --> 00:09:14,054 when I thought about Ellen dying someday. 192 00:09:15,514 --> 00:09:17,558 Never far from my mind either. 193 00:09:18,559 --> 00:09:20,143 Alright, my turn. 194 00:09:20,143 --> 00:09:22,187 Do it! 195 00:09:22,187 --> 00:09:25,649 Hug each other as hard as you can for a five-count. Kings! 196 00:09:28,402 --> 00:09:31,321 - Alright, well, bring it in. Okay. - I am gonna bring it in. Okay. 197 00:09:31,321 --> 00:09:32,322 Yeah. Yeah. 198 00:09:32,322 --> 00:09:33,323 Five... 199 00:09:34,449 --> 00:09:35,951 Four... 200 00:09:35,951 --> 00:09:37,369 I did it! 201 00:09:37,369 --> 00:09:39,830 It's working. They're bonding. 202 00:09:39,830 --> 00:09:40,831 Do it! 203 00:09:40,831 --> 00:09:43,458 Bench press your boy and tell him you love him. 204 00:09:43,458 --> 00:09:44,501 They're doing it. 205 00:09:44,501 --> 00:09:47,713 I did not know Jesse had that kind of upper body strength. 206 00:09:49,423 --> 00:09:50,674 And he dropped him. 207 00:09:50,674 --> 00:09:53,844 And here is the citrus-glazed salmon. 208 00:09:53,844 --> 00:09:56,138 Better keep that salmon away from your mother, kid. 209 00:09:56,138 --> 00:09:57,472 Shut up! 210 00:09:57,472 --> 00:10:00,058 It was one time! 211 00:10:00,851 --> 00:10:02,144 What happened with the salmon? 212 00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:04,771 So, we went to Coney Island-- 213 00:10:04,771 --> 00:10:08,150 Wait. You guys went to Coney Island? 214 00:10:08,150 --> 00:10:10,736 You guys ate salmon at Coney Island? 215 00:10:11,403 --> 00:10:14,781 We rode the Cyclone after we ate, and let's just say-- 216 00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:17,910 The salmon swam back upstream. 217 00:10:17,910 --> 00:10:20,954 Hilarious story from the, uh, amusement park 218 00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:23,457 that you didn't invite me to, even though my Insta bio says, 219 00:10:23,457 --> 00:10:26,460 "photographer, coffee lover, roller coaster fanatic." 220 00:10:28,170 --> 00:10:30,923 Um... Is everything okay? 221 00:10:32,174 --> 00:10:35,052 Sorry. [sighs] You know, I'm just-- I'm a little surprised. 222 00:10:36,470 --> 00:10:37,596 I'm gonna go freshen up. 223 00:10:41,308 --> 00:10:44,561 Wow. That didn't go as smoothly as I hoped. 224 00:10:45,604 --> 00:10:47,606 But, I think she's getting her head around it. 225 00:10:48,106 --> 00:10:49,233 She's running away. 226 00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:57,157 SOPHIE'S SON [on phone]: So you literally ran away. 227 00:10:57,741 --> 00:10:59,284 Like you never ran away? 228 00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:01,411 Remember when Dad and I said 229 00:11:01,411 --> 00:11:05,082 you couldn't go to Olivia Rodrigo's farewell tour? 230 00:11:05,082 --> 00:11:07,793 SOPHIE'S SON: Okay, let's get back to your story. 231 00:11:07,793 --> 00:11:09,211 Mm-hmm. 232 00:11:09,753 --> 00:11:11,463 Say it! 233 00:11:11,463 --> 00:11:13,590 Dude, what's your greatest fear? 234 00:11:13,590 --> 00:11:15,092 Oof. Uh... 235 00:11:16,093 --> 00:11:18,679 I guess... winding up alone. 236 00:11:19,429 --> 00:11:20,889 Come on. 237 00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:23,058 It's not gonna happen to a catch like you. 238 00:11:23,725 --> 00:11:26,228 Speaking of, how are things going with Parker? 239 00:11:26,228 --> 00:11:28,981 Oh! Great. Parker's amazing. 240 00:11:28,981 --> 00:11:30,941 She told me she's gonna stop seeing other people, 241 00:11:30,941 --> 00:11:32,609 and I've got no other people to stop seeing, 242 00:11:32,609 --> 00:11:34,778 so I guess we're exclusive. 243 00:11:35,571 --> 00:11:38,156 Which means any day now, she's gonna realize she's too good for me. 244 00:11:38,156 --> 00:11:40,409 Hey, don't you talk about my friend like that. 245 00:11:40,409 --> 00:11:42,119 You are a bloody dream. 246 00:11:42,119 --> 00:11:45,080 Thanks, Charlie. How are you this easy to talk to? 247 00:11:45,873 --> 00:11:48,292 He used that line on me at Wesleyan. 248 00:11:49,293 --> 00:11:51,211 Does he say that to all the boys? 249 00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:52,880 CHARLIE [on phone]: Say, Jesse. JESSE on [phone]: Mm? 250 00:11:53,505 --> 00:11:55,174 Would you ever want to go on vacation? 251 00:11:55,174 --> 00:11:57,301 You know, just the two of us? 252 00:11:57,718 --> 00:12:00,762 He's never asked me to go on vacation with him. 253 00:12:01,138 --> 00:12:04,516 Probably because living with me, it's like its own vacation. 254 00:12:04,516 --> 00:12:05,517 Right, Sid? 255 00:12:05,517 --> 00:12:08,061 Well, let me answer your question with another question. 256 00:12:08,562 --> 00:12:11,064 What are your thoughts on strawberry daqs? 257 00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:13,692 - My thoughts are... - Mm-hmm. 258 00:12:13,692 --> 00:12:17,362 - One glass, two straws. - Now you're talking! 259 00:12:19,072 --> 00:12:21,700 This is what we wanted, right? F-For them to like each other 260 00:12:21,700 --> 00:12:23,827 better than they like us? Sid? 261 00:12:24,953 --> 00:12:25,954 Sid! 262 00:12:27,789 --> 00:12:31,001 Oh! My super-period is over! I lost a lot of eggs, but I'm back. 263 00:12:31,001 --> 00:12:33,170 Yeah, she is. And so am I, so go home, Charlie! 264 00:12:33,170 --> 00:12:35,506 Eh, I'm good. We're in the middle of a game. 265 00:12:35,506 --> 00:12:36,840 Sorry about my roommate. 266 00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:38,258 My turn. 267 00:12:38,258 --> 00:12:40,844 I pick Say It. 268 00:12:40,844 --> 00:12:42,304 Super say it! - Yes! 269 00:12:42,304 --> 00:12:45,474 Both bros answer. Who is your closest homie? 270 00:12:45,474 --> 00:12:47,142 Ooh! Don't need to answer that. 271 00:12:47,935 --> 00:12:50,103 CHARLIE and JESSE: My closest homie is... 272 00:12:53,065 --> 00:12:55,067 Gotcha! ELLEN and SID: Hm? 273 00:12:55,067 --> 00:12:57,528 Yes, we found your little nanny cam. 274 00:12:57,528 --> 00:13:00,197 ELLEN [on speaker]: Okay, not sure how to work the nanny cam app, 275 00:13:00,197 --> 00:13:02,324 but the roommate trap plan is going amazing! 276 00:13:02,324 --> 00:13:04,201 SID [on speaker]: Seriously. And now, we get to tell Charlie 277 00:13:04,201 --> 00:13:06,161 and Jesse we're kicking them out guilt-free. 278 00:13:06,161 --> 00:13:08,121 God, we're geniuses! Mm-hmm. 279 00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:11,500 Hey, wh-why do you think that microphone icon on here is lit up? 280 00:13:12,209 --> 00:13:13,210 Hm... 281 00:13:13,210 --> 00:13:15,420 We could have been talking about anything! 282 00:13:16,088 --> 00:13:18,131 I don't understand. Why do you want to get rid of me? 283 00:13:18,632 --> 00:13:20,801 I don't want to get rid of you. It's just... 284 00:13:20,801 --> 00:13:22,761 I can afford my own place now. 285 00:13:23,220 --> 00:13:25,889 I thought we were living together for love, not to save money! 286 00:13:26,390 --> 00:13:28,559 Of course, we were living together to save money. 287 00:13:28,559 --> 00:13:30,227 Why else do people have roommates? 288 00:13:31,228 --> 00:13:33,730 So that when you throw up, you have someone to tell. 289 00:13:34,731 --> 00:13:37,359 Dude, Hannah and I are married. 290 00:13:37,359 --> 00:13:39,903 Like, you must've known I'd want to live alone with her when she moved back. 291 00:13:39,903 --> 00:13:43,490 Yeah, eventually. I didn't realize you wanted me gone the moment she got here. 292 00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:45,033 And why do I have to move out anyway? 293 00:13:45,450 --> 00:13:47,077 'Cause you can't afford it here! 294 00:13:47,077 --> 00:13:48,287 And you're never gonna find a roommate 295 00:13:48,287 --> 00:13:49,913 who pays seven-eighths of the rent like I do! 296 00:13:49,913 --> 00:13:53,208 Oh, so suddenly somebody's a fractioneer! 297 00:13:53,208 --> 00:13:54,459 What?! 298 00:13:58,630 --> 00:13:59,631 Oh... 299 00:14:00,132 --> 00:14:02,217 Get off of me! 300 00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:10,642 Hey, guys. 301 00:14:11,101 --> 00:14:12,769 My parents started dating behind my back, 302 00:14:12,769 --> 00:14:14,605 and I never wanna see them again! 303 00:14:16,148 --> 00:14:17,608 Sophie, it's your parents. 304 00:14:17,608 --> 00:14:19,067 I am not here. 305 00:14:22,821 --> 00:14:24,948 Excuse me, I'm moping in here! 306 00:14:24,948 --> 00:14:26,450 That's so childish. 307 00:14:26,450 --> 00:14:28,410 You mind if I hide under your desk from my parents? 308 00:14:35,334 --> 00:14:36,335 Is Sophie here? 309 00:14:36,335 --> 00:14:38,170 We have something we'd like to tell her. 310 00:14:39,671 --> 00:14:41,673 No! Mr. and Mrs. Sophie, 311 00:14:41,673 --> 00:14:44,176 she is definitely not here. 312 00:14:45,177 --> 00:14:47,095 Okay, well, if you see her, will you tell her 313 00:14:47,095 --> 00:14:49,056 we really love her and we're sorry? 314 00:14:49,056 --> 00:14:52,017 Yes, and whenever she's ready to talk to us, 315 00:14:52,017 --> 00:14:54,311 we'll be waiting back at the restaurant. 316 00:14:54,311 --> 00:14:56,104 Mention the tiramisu. 317 00:14:56,104 --> 00:14:58,398 NICK and LORI: Eating tiramisu! 318 00:14:58,398 --> 00:15:00,150 Ow! 319 00:15:00,150 --> 00:15:02,110 Oh, my God. Are you okay? 320 00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:05,948 I heard the word "tiramisu" and I got so excited. 321 00:15:07,783 --> 00:15:09,785 You think they're gone? - Yeah. 322 00:15:11,286 --> 00:15:14,248 So, you wanna explain why you're hiding from your parents? 323 00:15:14,248 --> 00:15:17,626 Yeah. They started secretly dating behind my back. 324 00:15:17,626 --> 00:15:20,420 My plan was for us to be a trio, 325 00:15:20,420 --> 00:15:22,631 and instead, they're a duo, and I'm an uno. 326 00:15:23,632 --> 00:15:24,967 Sophie. 327 00:15:24,967 --> 00:15:28,929 Just because your parents like each other doesn't mean they don't still love you. 328 00:15:28,929 --> 00:15:31,265 It's not just that. 329 00:15:31,265 --> 00:15:34,226 Th-They tell these stories that are so annoying, 330 00:15:34,226 --> 00:15:36,353 a-and their jokes are so lame. 331 00:15:36,353 --> 00:15:37,521 - Mm. - And they both use 332 00:15:37,521 --> 00:15:39,565 their iPhone flashlights to look at the menu. 333 00:15:39,565 --> 00:15:41,984 It wasn't even dimly lit in there. Boomers. 334 00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:44,778 - This is great! - What is? 335 00:15:44,778 --> 00:15:46,655 Your parents are irritating the shit out of you, 336 00:15:46,655 --> 00:15:48,657 and you've become the most immature version of yourself. 337 00:15:48,657 --> 00:15:50,200 You're officially a real family. 338 00:15:52,119 --> 00:15:55,080 Oh, my God. You're right. Mm-hmm. 339 00:15:55,080 --> 00:15:57,040 They drive me crazy. I hate their guts! 340 00:15:57,040 --> 00:15:58,500 I'm so happy! Yeah? 341 00:16:00,002 --> 00:16:01,628 Oh, wha... 342 00:16:02,379 --> 00:16:05,632 Look at you with a throw blanket on the end of your bed. 343 00:16:05,632 --> 00:16:07,301 Uh... 344 00:16:07,301 --> 00:16:09,178 This is really embarrassing, but I actually got that 345 00:16:09,178 --> 00:16:11,889 during our extremely brief foray into dating. 346 00:16:11,889 --> 00:16:12,806 Ooh. 347 00:16:12,806 --> 00:16:16,018 I don't know. I wanted you to be impressed, b-but then... 348 00:16:17,060 --> 00:16:20,147 - We crashed and burned. - Yeah. Over before it even began. 349 00:16:27,154 --> 00:16:29,823 Oh! My God, I hit my head really hard. 350 00:16:29,823 --> 00:16:31,450 You don't think I have a concussion, do you? 351 00:16:31,450 --> 00:16:33,452 - No, no, no. You're fine. - Okay, good. 352 00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:36,747 Uh, you don't think I have a concussion, do you? 353 00:16:40,792 --> 00:16:44,505 I'm gonna go back to the restaurant and meet up with my parents. 354 00:16:44,505 --> 00:16:47,508 I'm really sorry for wasting your evening. - Are you kidding? 355 00:16:47,508 --> 00:16:50,093 Hot Waiter is a Gemini! 356 00:16:50,093 --> 00:16:52,346 Oh, gonna get so weird together! 357 00:17:01,146 --> 00:17:02,523 Say it! 358 00:17:02,523 --> 00:17:06,109 When was the last time you lost control of your emotions, playa? 359 00:17:06,568 --> 00:17:08,612 A few minutes ago. 360 00:17:10,489 --> 00:17:14,368 Look, I know I need to move out so you can live alone here with your wife, 361 00:17:14,368 --> 00:17:15,953 and I couldn't be happier for you. 362 00:17:15,953 --> 00:17:18,830 Even if it is the end of an era. The Sid-Jesse Era. 363 00:17:18,830 --> 00:17:21,124 The Sesse Era. 364 00:17:21,124 --> 00:17:23,460 Hey, and we'll still get to hang out all the time. We just... 365 00:17:24,461 --> 00:17:26,672 won't get to sing our toothbrushing song anymore. 366 00:17:28,215 --> 00:17:30,259 BOTH [singing]: ♪ It's just... ahh... ♪ 367 00:17:30,259 --> 00:17:31,718 - A little brush. - Brush. 368 00:17:31,718 --> 00:17:33,554 Brush... 369 00:17:38,016 --> 00:17:39,059 I take it all back. 370 00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:43,897 Of course, there are other reasons to have roommates besides saving money. 371 00:17:45,274 --> 00:17:47,734 I wanna be the first person to know when you throw up. 372 00:17:47,734 --> 00:17:49,736 Oh, thank God. 373 00:17:51,071 --> 00:17:53,156 'Cause I have something to tell you... 374 00:17:59,204 --> 00:18:00,581 I'm sorry for going missing. 375 00:18:01,498 --> 00:18:03,709 Oh, you guys must have been so scared. 376 00:18:05,711 --> 00:18:07,379 - Terrified. - We almost called the police. 377 00:18:09,590 --> 00:18:12,092 We're sorry that we were sneaking around behind your back. 378 00:18:13,010 --> 00:18:14,386 Although... 379 00:18:14,386 --> 00:18:15,888 maybe that's what made it so red-hot. 380 00:18:17,139 --> 00:18:19,600 I'm kidding. It's your mom's body is what made it so hot. 381 00:18:19,600 --> 00:18:20,309 Dad! 382 00:18:20,309 --> 00:18:22,060 Your body is what made it so hot. 383 00:18:22,060 --> 00:18:22,728 Mom! 384 00:18:25,147 --> 00:18:27,357 Why were you guys sneaking around? 385 00:18:28,358 --> 00:18:30,944 We just didn't wanna say anything to you 386 00:18:30,944 --> 00:18:34,281 until we figured out what this was. 387 00:18:34,281 --> 00:18:36,783 I mean, the first time around, it-it was... 388 00:18:37,826 --> 00:18:39,870 It was over before it even began. 389 00:18:41,163 --> 00:18:42,581 I know the feeling. 390 00:18:43,957 --> 00:18:47,044 But, this time I think it has real potential. 391 00:18:49,421 --> 00:18:52,508 There's something to be said for second chances. 392 00:18:59,681 --> 00:19:01,141 Hm. 393 00:19:01,767 --> 00:19:03,602 My friends are having a game night. 394 00:19:05,062 --> 00:19:07,314 If it's okay, I think I'm gonna go. 395 00:19:07,314 --> 00:19:09,358 Of course, sweetie. 396 00:19:09,858 --> 00:19:12,653 It sounds kinda lame to me, but those are your friends. 397 00:19:19,409 --> 00:19:22,412 Actually, uh, I just remembered that I hate games. 398 00:19:23,622 --> 00:19:25,374 Don't even really like nights that much. 399 00:19:29,294 --> 00:19:31,213 Anyone up for another round of tiramisu? 400 00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:33,423 I don't know. 401 00:19:34,216 --> 00:19:35,759 I didn't like mine very much. 402 00:19:38,178 --> 00:19:39,555 Parents. 403 00:19:39,555 --> 00:19:41,473 SOPHIE'S SON [on phone]: Seriously.