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What if I need you for some of your old tricks?
- What do you got? - If I text you some pictures,
you think you can find out about a couple of people?
All right, send me the pics. I'll get right on 'em.
Thank you.
- [door opens] - Huh?
I know what you and your son are doing here, lady.
[crack]
♪♪ [jazz]
♪ I need one little kiss ♪
♪ From Lady Love ♪
LANDON: I'm so pumped for this, Steph.
Been wanting to take you here for a few weeks now.
My mouth is already watering.
Save some of that for later.
You're bad! You're so bad!
[laughing]
♪ When will all my wildest dreams ♪
Did I lie? How was it?
Terrible, actually.
Really?
Landon, relax. I'm kidding.
You were right. It was amazing.
You're amazing.
You must be getting a little sick of me telling you that.
Are you kidding? I love it.
I love you, Steph.
You do?
There. I finally said it.
Have you been waiting awhile?
About three months.
[giggles] That's how long we've known each other.
You're keeping track too?
I'm in love with you too, Landon.
Yeah?
Yeah.
I can't believe I still haven't seen your house.
Well, I wanted you to fall in love with me, not my house.
So now that we're in love and all,
I think it's time that you met my mother.
She just got into town,
and she'll be staying with me for a few weeks,
so the timing's perfect, unless you think it's too soon.
No, no. I was about to say the same thing to you.
I really want you to come to the house,
meet my father and my sister.
I would love that.
Let's do it. Right away.
I don't know. How about tomorrow?
If that's the absolute soonest.
[giggles]
What's wrong?
I don't know.
I mean, do you think your father will like me?
Yes, of course he will.
I'm serious, Landon.
We come from two completely different worlds.
Your family is like cover of Forbes Magazine.
And mine?
Well, we're... not.
None of that's important, okay?
And as far as him liking you,
as was my experience,
George Rudolph won't know what hit him.
I hope that you're right.
How about your mother? Think she'll like me?
Christine is just gonna eat you up.
That's good 'cause...
Ohh... Mm.
Are you okay?
Um... yeah.
I just got a little bit dizzy all of a sudden.
I'm good.
Actually, I'm great.
Uh, hey, it's Denise.
Yeah. I need you to do me a favor.
Should we go?
Yeah, let's.
[beep]
STEPHANIE: I can't wait for tomorrow.
Me too.
But are you sure I can't come in tonight?
I still am feeling a little weird.
I'm sorry.
Plus I need to get my beauty rest for tomorrow.
Give me a break.
You won't even need a beauty nap.
Don't forget my mom's inside.
Tomorrow. Love you.
Love you too.
[gasps]
- You startled me. - How'd it go?
Excellent.
CHRISTINE : Wow. This place is very nice.
STEPHANIE: And big.
Uh-huh.
You're looking a little nervous. Are you all right?
Maybe I am. A little.
I need this to go right.
Now don't worry, honey. Mama's here.
I'm gonna make sure that man in there is yours.
All yours. And soon.
Okay.
[exhales]
[doorbell rings]
- Hi. I'm Stephanie. - I'm Bridget.
- Yes. Landon's mentioned you. - He's mentioned you as well.
This is my mother, Christine.
- Hi. - Hello.
Well, please, come on in.
I'll go get Landon for you.
Make yourselves at home.
Don't have to tell us twice.
- Wow. - Incredible.
LANDON: There they are.
Hi, baby!
Mmm, I missed you.
And now I see why Stephanie's such a knockout.
Apple, tree.
This one's got "sweet talker" written all over him.
Landon, this is my mother.
Mom, this is Landon.
So nice to meet you, Ms. Barton.
Name's Christine.
And I'm a hugger, not a shaker.
Landon, Landon, Landon, I just love your home.
I've seen places like this only from the outside.
Thank you for hosting us today.
I should be thanking you.
Oh, I know. She's pretty special.
She sure is.
Come meet the others.
After you.
Look who's here, Dad.
[spritz]
Who is this handsome gentleman?
LANDON: Christine, Stephanie,
this is my father, George.
Ladies, welcome to my home.
And it's a lovely home, George.
Thank you for the invitation.
Oh, it's my pleasure.
And this is Stephanie.
Hello, Mr. Rudolph.
Please, call me George.
So do you live nearby?
Oh, well, I'm just visiting from out of town.
And I live a few towns over.
Sorry to say I'm wildly priced out of this neighborhood.
Don't be sorry about that.
Holy smokes!
Would you look at this estate.
Ah, it's just incredible.
It's such a beautiful day.
Can we take a look at the backyard?
Why not?
STEPHANIE: It's like paradise out here.
CHRISTINE: Just incredible.
You should see it at night.
We'll have to do that sometime.
Now, what do we have here?
[whistles]
CHRISTINE: Can't you just see me now?
Big floppy hat,
sunglasses,
basking in the summer sun with an ice-cold lemonade,
watching my future grandchildren running their little legs off.
Mom, too soon.
Oh, I don't know. I kinda like lemonade.
Oh, George, take a look at them.
Aren't they the loveliest couple?
Oh, my God. So much.
Hi.
Christine, Stephanie,
this is my kid sister, Alice.
Just a few years younger, and he still calls me a kid.
Well, George, I must say,
you do make the most beautiful children.
Yeah, him and my mother did a great job in that department.
Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that she passed.
- Why? You didn't even know her. - Alice!
Sorry, sorry. I must be hungry or something.
Why don't we all move into the dining room, huh?
Sounds good to me.
- Landon? - Yes.
Would you mind if I use the ladies' room?
Of course. Let me show you.
Thank you.
[door closes]
Oh, it's just exquisite, Landon.
- How do you like it? - Oh, it's beautiful.
Right over here, Christine.
Can you find your way back?
Oh, yes, I can handle it.
[click]
Mine.
[click]
LANDON: Christine? Everything all right?
Yes! I-I'll be right there!
[typing]
BRIDGET: Ma'am?
Bridget, hi!
- What are you doing in here? - Oh, well, I'm sorry.
I was using the ladies' room,
and I remembered that I had an important email to check up on.
So you just walk into a stranger's study
and use his computer without permission?
Permission?
Oh, well, it's just an email.
I-I didn't think he'd really mind.
But you're...
You're absolutely right.
I-I should've asked him first.
Can we just keep this between the two of us?
My daughter is madly in love,
and she's trying to make a good first impression on the family,
and she will never forgive me
if I'm the reason that it all goes south.
Well, Landon is in love with her too,
so we can keep this between us.
Oh, thank you, Bridget. You're a lifesaver.
Can I show you to the others now, please?
Absolutely.
There she is. Did you get lost?
Oh, I did. Bridget found me.
Could you take a quick picture of all of us?
- Thank you. - Oh, do we have to?
I hate having my photo taken.
Why is that?
Oh, I feel self-conscious, I guess.
You have nothing to worry about, Christine.
You look beautiful.
Come over here. Stand next to your daughter.
Oh, all right. Just one.
[click]
Got it.
Thank you.
So how'd you two meet?
At a sports bar, of all places.
Really?
I was just there, watching a game with a few friends.
- She came right up to me-- - Excuse me.
Honey, are you okay?
You look a little pale.
I-I didn't want to say anything,
but I am feeling a little bit off.
Oh, no. You're not feeling well again?
Same thing happened last night at dinner.
Um, I'm okay, really.
Just a little lightheaded, that's all.
[sighs] We're all together.
We're having a nice time. Let's just enjoy the day.
So how come there's no cute, fluffy animals scurrying around?
Well, that would be my fault.
I have a bad allergy and underlying condition.
Oh, no. What is it?
Well, Dad's asthmatic.
I mean, you've seen him with his inhaler.
Oh, is that what's going on?
Here I was thinking it was just me
you were losing your breath over.
[chuckling]
Sorry. Did I forget to mention that my mother
has no filter sometimes?
[Christine laughs]
You certainly don't need to apologize for your mom.
[laughs]
Before we eat, I'd just like to make a quick toast.
I want to say how nice it is
when two families can come together like this.
It's so awesome.
I'm sure this will be just the first of many meals
shared between the Bartons and Rudolphs.
- Cheers. - Cheers.
Cheers.
Dinner's almost ready.
[beeping]
[phone rings]
Detective Jenkins.
Hey, did you get what I overnighted you?
That empty wine glass?
The one with the fingerprints on it? Yeah.
And what exactly am I supposed to do with it?
What do you think? Find out whose fingers they were.
Supposedly they belong to a woman named Stephanie Barton,
but you tell me if that checks out or not.
On what basis?
On the basis I don't think that's her real name.
Look, Denise, I can't go wasting taxpayers' good money
on folks who may or may not have committed a crime.
Should I just call the police?
Isn't that what you're doing?
I'm talking to a friend who was kind to me a year ago
when that maniac killed someone I loved.
Denise--
Look, you worked with my husband for years.
- Now you owe him. - Fine!
- I'll send it to the lab. - Thank you.
But I hope you understand.
You sticking your nose back into this
puts you at risk.
I get why you're obsessed with her.
Just let me know what you find out.
I'm just so embarrassed.
I can't believe that I ruined today.
Baby, it's okay.
Oh, you didn't ruin anything, honey.
Listen to your mom.
Despite the way it ended, it still went great.
In fact, my dad's so worried about you,
he wants me to call him, let him know you're okay.
Am I okay? I still feel so queasy.
[sighs] What's wrong with me?
Stephie, are you late?
What do you mean?
I mean with her monthly visitor, Landon.
Actually, by a few weeks maybe?
And the last couple of days, you've been nauseous, headaches.
Didn't you tell me recently you've been exhausted?
Yeah. It's not as if I'm not sleeping.
I felt the same way 33 years ago.
Wait, wait, wait, wait. You don't think that I'm...
Pregnant? I'd bet the house on it.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
A-Are you serious? I might be a father?
Well, let's find out.
I picked up a home pregnancy test on the way over here.
That's why you had me stop?
A mom tends to know these things.
Well, should we go into the other room and test my theory?
- This is so crazy. - Tell me about it.
Well, come on. Let's go into the bathroom.
Do you need a hand?
No, I've got her.
So? How'd I do?
Ehh.
Hey, I've never been pregnant before.
How do I know how they act?
I sold it enough though, right?
Yeah, you did fine.
But we have a lot more work to do.
So where's the test?
Here.
And you really think he's just gonna believe
this piece of plastic?
Don't worry, darling. I've got a lot more planned.
We've got this.
Well, what's the verdict?
Two bars.
Meaning...
You're gonna be a daddy, Landon.
[laughing]
Landon.
Hey.
How's Stephanie?
Uh, pregnant, apparently.
You joking?
Did you just say you knocked this girl up?
We weren't trying to. It just happened, I guess.
You guess.
How do you know this?
She took a pregnancy test.
Showed me the stick afterwards. Two bars.
Well, that doesn't mean anything.
Anyone can get their hands on one of those.
I knew a girl in college who tried to trap her boyfriend
with that same technique.
That's ridiculous.
Is it? Son, you've always been a little gullible,
and your judgment's definitely been questionable.
What's wrong with my judgment?
Fine. I made a bad call or two with work, but...
I don't know.
Maybe this will be exactly the thing I need to focus more.
Yeah, 'cause a crying baby's good for focusing.
I'm not trying to insult you.
It's just I'm used to people trying to take advantage of me.
It's what happens when you have a lot to take advantage of.
Well, I like to believe in the good in people.
I did too, till I was about 10 years old.
It's time you grew up, son.
- That's what I'm trying to do. - [phone ringing]
It's her.
So answer.
Hey, baby. How you feeling?
Okay. Yeah.
Yeah, sure, I can do that. Tomorrow's fine.
Just let me know what time. Okay.
Call me back.
Okay. Love you.
Stephanie's setting up an appointment with her ob-gyn.
Wants me to go with her.
My eyes are open, guys, okay?
But I know this girl.
I know her. She wouldn't lie to me.
Fine.
See what the doctor says, then we'll go from there.
LANDON: This guy must be good.
- He's three towns away. - He's the best.
Jesus, Landon, what if we're actually having a kid?
Oh, you are, trust me.
Are you as freaked out as I am?
I'd say that's an accurate assessment.
Maybe more.
Don't worry. We'll figure it out.
I don't know about you two,
but something about all this feels just right.
Yeah.
Me too.
[door closes]
- Oh! - And how are we doing in here?
We're all a little anxious.
Speak for yourself.
Well, let's end the mystery, shall we?
I got your test results.
And?
And the results are confirmed.
Congratulations, Mommy.
Oh, I knew it! I just knew it!
Was that too much? I don't want to hurt the baby.
Landon, I've been pregnant for like a minute.
You're not gonna break me.
Congratulations, baby.
Will you two mind leaving us alone, so we can wrap things up?
Sometimes mommies-to-be have embarrassing questions
they like to ask their doctor.
[chuckling]
LANDON: You got it.
- We'll be right outside. - Okay.
So...
Are you a good man, Landon?
Excuse me?
I said, "Are you a good man?"
My gut tells me you are.
And Stephanie surely says so.
I just hope that you really do love my daughter like you say.
I really do.
Good, because now there's a child in the mix,
and a child needs a mother and a father at home together.
That was the way I was raised, Christine
and that's how I plan on raising my kids.
All right, then. I feel better.
- I can't believe this. - Yeah.
[alarm chirps]
ALICE: I still can't believe you got this girl pregnant.
You know her name is Stephanie.
Who you've known for like 12 weeks.
So what?
So you know what do you know about her?
What do you know about anything?
I am just so relieved that you're okay.
I'm good, George.
Just got this baby growing my belly.
Be honest with me.
What do you really think about all this?
Well, I think that I will do the grandpa thing very well.
What do you think?
I think that you're awesome.
Well, I don't know about that.
Look, Landon, I know we don't always get along,
but I need to look out for the family, don't I?
You would do the same for me.
I mean, these women are pretty much strangers to us.
And if anything, I don't want to see you get hurt by this girl.
Thank you for that, really, but I trust Stephanie.
So that means I trust her mother too.
- Hi, guys. - Hey.
I love your necklace. It's so pretty.
Thank you. I guess yours too.
- Thanks. - I guess, huh?
Yeah.
- Some day, huh? - You can say that again.
CHRISTINE: We're gonna be grandparents.
I just can't believe it.
It's wonderful, isn't it?
I just...
I just wish they were married, that's all.
Oh, you and me too, believe me.
But with Stephanie pregnant,
I will definitely support 'em, no matter what.
I just can't wait to meet the little booger.
You know, I've been thinking.
It might be a good idea if Stephanie moved in here with us,
so we can make her as comfortable as possible.
I think she would really love that idea.
And you too.
Me? Really?
As far as I'm concerned,
you are more than welcome to stay with us through the birth.
George, I can't believe it.
Thank you! You're the best!
You are so welcome.
Mine.
TV REPORTER: ...controversial policies,
then it becomes a matter to all Europeans
who invest in those issues and other nations,
and that political statements have taken...
- Hi. - Hi, George.
Where are the others?
Let's see. Uh, Alice is over at a friend's house,
Stephanie and Landon, they went out,
and I don't know where.
Well, that's good.
I'm sure they could use some alone time, like all of us.
Like all of us.
What are we watching here?
Just a little cable news.
Oh, we could do so much better than that.
[phone buzzing]
Text from Landon.
Oh, really? What does it say? Is everything all right?
[chuckling]
[gasps, laughs]
Look at that.
STEPHANIE: Okay.
I feel ridiculous. [laughs]
You're not trying to kidnap me, are you?
Come on, just a few more steps.
Okay, enough. I want my eyes back.
Okay, okay.
This is where we met.
I was sitting right over there at that booth
when you came up to me and changed my life forever.
Do you remember what you said?
- No. - You said,
"Move! I can't see the game!"
No, I did not say that.
Yeah, you did.
It was only so you could sidle up next to me.
Well, that part, I remember.
It was so crowded in here that night.
- There's no one in here now. - I noticed.
Is that your doing?
Oh, look, our bartender has our drinks ready.
Sorry we can't both have our usual.
- Grab 'em though, will you? - Sure thing.
Thank you.
So which one of these is for me?
[gasps] Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Will you marry me, Steph?
- Yes? - Yes!
Yes! Yes!
[laughing]
This is crazy.
Are you happy?
I'm so happy. Are you?
So many changes.
I know what I want.
I can't wait to tell our parents.
I don't think you'll have to wait all that long.
- Mom? - Oh!
Let me see, let me see.
Ohh! [laughing]
- Oh, congratulations, you two. - Thank you.
Heard there was some kind of event going on here tonight.
[laughter]
[George laughs]
CHRISTINE: Off to bed? GEORGE: I am.
You gonna stay up for a while?
I don't know. I'm bushed.
What a day.
You said it. You all settled in your room?
Oh, yes. It's just perfect.
Thank you, George. [chuckles]
Oh, it's a done deal.
Our kids are getting hitched, and we're gonna be grandparents.
We're gonna make a great team.
[chuckles]
Morning, Dad.
- Morning, son. - How you feeling?
Feeling good. How about you?
Feeling good, thank you.
I could take some more of that coffee, if you will.
Yeah, sure.
Thank you. So where's your fiancée?
She is still sleeping.
Last couple of nights have been a little rough,
nausea and all.
I remember when your mother was pregnant with you.
She spent half the time hovered over the toilet.
[Landon chuckles]
You know...
I'm proud of you, son.
For what, knocking up Stephanie?
Anybody can get a girl pregnant.
But not everybody steps up.
Not everybody does the right thing.
Might be the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Look, it's not that I don't love you.
It's just that I expect more.
Trust me, Dad, I know.
Look, I know that I'm a little hard on you,
but if not me, then who?
I get it.
I'm just really glad you're cool with all this.
I know it was a pretty big surprise.
Well, Stephanie's with child.
You both seem very happy.
You're being responsible. You're doing the right thing.
I can't ask for more than that.
So...
Christine's a real sweetheart, huh?
A real pistol too.
Yeah, you might say that.
Do you like her?
I just met the woman.
Well, she seems to really fancy you.
Oh, really? When did you become British?
Look, I just want to let you know,
as far as Mom goes,
if something were to happen between the two of you,
like romantically or anything,
I think it'd be a good thing.
Well, I appreciate that,
but I'm not so sure your sister would agree.
Yeah. I haven't seen too much of her lately.
Yeah, she's been spending time with friends,
avoiding the house.
Alice is young. She misses Mom.
We all do.
But... I mean, who knows?
Maybe having someone like Christine in the house right now
is exactly what she needs.
Good morning, gentlemen!
- Good morning. - Good morning.
Oh, have you boys eaten?
Oh, it's Bridget's day off.
I could whip something up for you real quick.
That's fine, thank you.
All I need is this fuel right here.
I'm good, thank you.
How'd you sleep?
Like a log. I'm just so comfy here.
How's my Stephie doing?
She had a tough night. She's getting some rest.
Yeah, what to expect when you're expecting.
And how about you, George? Did you get your rest?
I got my full eight, thank you.
Then you might have the energy
to properly show me around this house, finally.
Haven't I?
Ma'am, I am embarrassed.
With all the craziness going on around here,
let me make up for it.
Give you the cook's tour right now.
[gasps] I'm ready.
Saddle up, ma'am.
[laughing]
Have a good time, kids.
Oh, thank you, son.
Here we go.
Well, thank you for the tour.
My pleasure.
Oh, you say that like it's a request or something.
[chuckles]
You know, you have never told me what line of business you're in.
Steel.
George, don't tease a girl.
[laughs]
How are you feeling?
A little better.
Where is everyone?
I think my dad's still showing your mom around Casa de Rudolph.
How adorable would it be if they got together too?
Yeah, like some terrible sitcom you can't turn off.
[chuckles]
This is my favorite room in the whole house.
Mm. Wow, George.
I've never seen anything like it.
The men I've dated since Stephie's father passed,
and including Stephie's father,
they were all good men,
but they didn't exactly light the world on fire
when it came to making money.
There's nothing wrong with that.
I know you say that,
but I still feel like a country mouse
in a city mouse world.
There's more to a man than his bank account.
Same is true for a woman.
Have you read all those?
For the most part.
"A man is known by the books he reads."
ralph Waldo Emerson.
Oh, and you know your poetry too.
Of course you do.
Lady Chatterley's Lover?
Why, I've read that one twice, actually.
You're a bit of a dirty bird.
Oh, that's a nice chess set.
Is it just for show?
Are you kidding?
I use chess strategies to make most of my business ones.
Do you play?
I thought you'd never ask.
I just love this game.
You sit across from another person,
your competitor,
and you just watch all the pieces move on the table.
One piece here, one piece there...
And you never know what the other person's thinking.
Exactly.
It's kind of a microcosm of life.
That's what my father felt.
He taught me how to play when I was barely 10 years old.
I think he just wanted someone to play with.
But, boy, did I love those afternoons.
Rainy days especially.
I used to play Ellen in this room at least twice a week.
- She'd beat me most days. - [chuckles]
But every once in a while, she'd let me win.
You must miss her a lot.
You don't spend the better part of your life with a person
and not feel the loss when they're gone.
That's a sweet thought, George,
and I agree with you.
But our lives aren't over yet.
Point taken.
It's your move, Christine.
I thought I just made it.
[tap]
Checkmate.
Oh, George.
Well done.
[coughs]
LANDON: Wanna go take a nap? STEPHANIE: Yeah, let's go.
Hello.
Oh, Bridget!
Uh, I thought today was your day off.
Yeah, looks like you did.
I forgot something. I had to come back and get it.
Well, I bet you're wondering what I'm doing in here.
Yeah, since it is the second time I caught you
going through George's things, I am.
Uh, well, I have just got a mother of a headache,
and I was looking in his bathroom,
and I didn't see any aspirin,
so I thought that I would check his nightstand real quick
and...
Great! So you wouldn't mind
if I went and told him you were in here.
Well, you know, I...
I got the headache from playing chess with him all morning,
so I don't think he'll mind.
Come on, let's go tell him together.
Fine.
I really don't know why
you're making such a big deal about this.
Wait! Wait! I just have one last thing to say.
What?
Have a nice trip, bitch.
[Bridget groaning]
[gasps]
LANDON: Oh, my God. Bridget!
[gasping]
[sirens blaring]
DETECTIVE JANE: And how long was she working for you?
She'd been running our house for a few years.
I can't believe she's dead.
I know. One day she's here taking care of us, the next...
I'm so sorry. I know how much you liked her.
Did anyone actually see her take the fall?
No.
I mean, I don't think so. I know I didn't.
It was her day off. She shouldn't even have been here.
She must have come back for something.
Where were you all when it happened?
We were taking a nap upstairs.
I was out back, reading the paper.
I was outside on the phone with a friend when I came in, and...
and she was just laying there on the floor.
How about you?
Me? Oh, well...
I had been playing chess with George all morning,
and then I went up to my room to relax for a bit.
You know, I barely knew her, but I...
I just feel awful about this.
Yeah, well, you'll be surprised
how often accidents happen in the home, just like this.
As common as a cold.
Mm. It's just such a shock.
It's terrible.
What really happened up here?
Bridget fell down the steps.
Fell or pushed?
Now why would someone want to do that?
Tell me the truth.
I don't have to tell you anything.
Forget about the maid. It's old news.
And get your head back into the game.
[distant whistle]
- [gasps] - Shh! Shh!
You scared the hell out of me. What are you doing out here?
Calm down. I just had to come by and touch base with you
before I make my play.
I should just calm down then.
Thank you for the brilliant advice.
I'm kind of in the middle of something in there.
Yeah, I know.
So is everything still going according to plan?
So far, so good, I guess.
Yeah? No major surprises?
Just a dead maid.
Took a tumble down the staircase yesterday.
Dead maid. Yeah, that's kind of a left turn there.
I know she's lying about it. Says the woman fell,
but she had to have had some help falling down the stairs.
By help, I mean a big old push.
Yeah, that sounds like a classic.
She's gotta be holding all the cards,
working all the angles.
And keeping us in the dark just long enough
to get us to do what she needs done.
She definitely has an M.O.
And she can't find out that I told you about this.
Well, trust me, I'm not gonna tell her.
She would never trust
that we wouldn't try to double-cross her on this,
and then she would put a stop to this before we even got started.
I can't have that happen.
I need this money to come through.
Yeah? You and me both.
Okay, when we're in there alone with her,
what are you gonna do?
I'm gonna get into actor mode
and just keep pretending that we're complete strangers.
You nail this part, and I promise you we are golden.
Now what am I gonna tell her about how I tracked her down?
You got anything?
Um, I don't know. I don't think so.
We did take this engagement photo that got posted online.
It's all of us together, one big happy family.
Couldn't you say you came across it
and recognized your old partner?
Yeah, yeah, that's good. That'll work.
Really hope I didn't make a mistake,
pulling you into this.
Oh, yeah? That's funny
'cause that's exactly what I thought last year
when I found you, hmm?
Scamming all those guys in that online dating crap.
Who helped you out, huh? Who gave you a chance
on a better score to get some training?
You don't have to keep reminding me.
I know that I owe you.
After this, you won't.
All right, I better get back inside
before someone gets suspicious.
Well, off you go.
I'll see you later.
I was just thinking.
Well, I hope it's not about moving that rook too soon.
No, no. I was thinking
maybe we should postpone the wedding for a while.
Why? Because of Bridget?
Well, that and things have been moving pretty fast around here.
Might be time to put brakes on for a bit.
Well, maybe we should talk about that.
We are talking about it.
I just think a pause might be in order.
[doorbell rings]
Who's that?
I'm not expecting anyone. Are you?
No.
- [ding dong] - LANDON: Oh.
God, I forgot we don't have Bridget anymore.
- Do you want me to get it? - No, no, I'll get it.
[ding dong]
- Yes? - Hello there.
Hi.
You must be Stephanie's fiancé.
I'm James.
Landon.
I have heard nothing but good things about you.
Oh, well, come on in.
Stephanie, Christine!
There's someone here to see you guys.
Thought you weren't expecting anyone.
I'm not.
You two have a visitor. Your cousin James stopped by.
Isn't that great?
- Hey! - James.
Auntie Christine.
[laughs]
What are you doing here?
I'm here to see my favorite auntie and cousin.
Come here you. How long has it been?
I don't know. You tell me.
Too long. Far too long.
And how did you find us?
My mother told me that you're not staying at Stephanie's.
You're staying here instead, so I figured the heck with it.
I'll just drop by and surprise you.
You sure did. [laughs]
What's going on?
Oh, well, this is my nephew James.
James, I'm George Rudolph.
I know who you are you are. You're George Rudolph.
Steel mogul. Andrew Carnegie of our time.
You're going a little too far there.
- Well, it's an honor, sir. - Nice bottle.
You heard Stephanie's pregnant, I take it.
I couldn't very well show up empty-handed now, could I?
Champagne for everyone, except for the mother, of course.
So, auntie Christine,
are you happy to see me or what?
Thrilled to death.
Welcome.
Oh, I do love this room you have here, aunt Chris.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
It is a nice room, James.
It'd be a flippin' shame if I had to mess it up
by shooting you.
What, you mean again?
Careful. It'd be a lot harder to explain away this
than the maid.
I don't know what you're talking about.
What are you doing here, James?
Well, I'm getting in on the action.
What gives you any right to just get in on the action, huh?
So I'll tell you.
I was, uh, abruptly eliminated
from the last score that I had here with your mother,
so we're gonna make that right.
You shot this guy? Your last partner?
No. He got in the way of someone else's bullet.
Oh, .... This is getting so out of hand.
First the maid goes down, and this dude shows up?
I came here to make money, okay?
I don't want to kill anyone.
Having second thoughts?
I know I'm not.
Hey, I got pushed out of the money on that job too.
But you didn't have to take a bullet for the effort.
- Do you know what the grift is? - Of course I do.
It's your standard screw, marry, run.
You find yourself in a family way
from the nice, unsuspecting sack downstairs,
then you get him to make it official.
Oh, by the way, bang-up job. I can tell.
That is one smitten kitten.
Meanwhile, you are cozying up to the rich old man
and making him comfortable with the idea
of combining the families.
And when they're not looking, you clean out the accounts,
and you get the hell out of here.
What are we supposed to do with this?
LANDON: Steph, where are you?
I'll be right there!
Better go.
LANDON: Steph?
Coming!
So who told you we were here?
Oh.
I saw the nicest engagement announcement online.
Damn it.
You look different,
but I would never forget that face.
Look, this is happening. Deal with it.
Unless, of course, you want me to go downstairs right now,
blow this whole thing up.
You made the last job personal.
That was a onetime mistake.
All right. I can use you.
What do you want me to do?
Just play the charming cousin for the time being,
and when the time comes for you to step it up,
I'll let you know.
Rate?
Twenty percent. Not a penny more.
Deal.
[chuckles]
Let's talk about tonight.
You know what? It's been the longest day.
Can we talk after I grab a quick shower?
Make yourself at home.
You certainly have.
[tapping continues]
So are you surprised I found you?
Not really.
My random luck isn't nearly as good as the luck I make.
No hard feelings me crashing the party?
No, we're good.
You think any of this is gonna be a problem?
No. I got this one lock, stock and barrel.
Ha! I've heard that before.
I got it handled.
♪♪ [light jazz]
Alice, can we have a little chat,
maybe in the dining room?
Come on.
Would anyone care for a refill?
Thanks, man. I think we're good.
No problem.
- What? - I'm just thinking about Mom.
Do you think she'd approve?
Yes, I think she would.
If you two are as lucky to have
as many incredible years as we did,
you'll be fine.
Well, Dad, if you keep inching down the road you're on,
I'd say you're gonna go two for two.
[chuckles]
So what do you want?
I'm more concerned about what you want right now.
Well, I don't want to be here, that's for sure.
My father made me come.
That's because he's worried about you.
It's been pretty chaotic around here.
Chaotic? A woman died in our house.
Yeah, and that's a tragedy,
but you heard what the detective said.
These things happen all the time.
Meaning what, exactly?
Meaning that we have to look forward.
We have to concentrate on the good things that life provides,
especially when it comes to your mother.
Don't talk about my mother.
I only bring her up in the spirit of gratitude.
Look at your brother over there.
Don't you just think future fatherhood when you see him?
And you, you're gonna be an aunt.
Now, don't you worry.
Everything works out the way it's supposed to.
Can I have everyone's attention, please?
Your father wants us.
Come on in.
I'd like to propose a toast to my son Landon
and my future daughter-in-law, Stephanie.
It was Mark Twain who said to find the full value of joy,
you have to have someone to divide it with.
May you two divide it together till the end of your days.
Cheers.
Hear, hear.
Thanks... Dad.
That was a beautiful toast, George.
Well, I think I'll put on some music.
Yeah, sure.
- Excuse me, please. - Of course.
[James sighs]
Hey.
Hello, cousin.
Finding your way around?
Well this is not my first rodeo,
but judging from the looks of it,
it might be yours.
I'm green, but I'm not that green.
Any advice?
Do not let this get personal,
like I did on my last job.
Whatever's gonna happen to these people,
it's gonna happen.
She's a real smoothie, huh?
Huh. Sure is.
Just about the best I ever worked with,
right up to the point when she shot me.
You need a new drink.
- That, I do. - Can I refill that for you?
James, thank you, sir.
You're welcome.
Let me get you another one. Yo, sir.
- Thanks so much. - Certainly.
♪♪ [ominous]
♪♪ [continues]
George, let me tuck you in, honey.
Ah, that's right.
That's right.
Inhaler, inhaler.
Are you excited, George?
- Inhaler! - Do you need? Where is it?
Oh, there! Oh, oh, George!
What's wrong? Is that empty, George?
- What the hell? - What's wrong?
Oh, here!
Oh, no, George. That one's empty too.
- [gasping] - Who's supposed to fill these?
Oh, try this one. Might have a little more juice.
[wheezing]
- Aww! - [gasping]
Oh, come on. Take a little more deep breaths.
- Come on, come on. - You bitch! You bitch!
George, I've been called worse.
You go, poor baby.
Go, go, go. On your last breath?
- George? - [wheezing]
[gasping]
George?
- All right, now. - [gasping continues]
George! George!
Help! Help! Oh, George!
George, are you breathing?
Help George! Help us! Help us!
Bring some inhalers! He can't breathe!
[small breaths]
Aw, George, I'm so sorry.
Mission accomplished, baby.
See you on the other side.
STEPHANIE: Did you really have to put the old man in a coma?
CHRISTINE: What choice did I have?
He was gonna postpone the wedding,
and we couldn't have that.
What did you think the shelf life is on us being here?
You told this guy the plan and not me?
It's on a need-to-know basis, and he needed to know.
LANDON: Steph? Steph?
We're out by the pool.
Look, when in doubt, stick to the plan.
We're close now.
Hi, baby.
Hey.
How's your father?
Still in a coma.
Doctors have no idea how long it's gonna be.
Alice stayed back at the hospital.
Maybe I should have stayed with her.
I'm glad that you're here.
I just don't understand how this happened.
They found a bunch of ibuprofen in his system.
Did you see him take any pills last night?
No, I didn't see him take anything.
But now that you mention it,
he did mention something about a headache.
Those things bring on asthma attacks all the time.
Well, he had a little bit to drink too.
Maybe he wasn't thinking straight.
I just don't understand
why there weren't more inhalers nearby.
There usually are.
He keeps a few in the nightstand next to his bed.
Well, he looked in that drawer, and it was empty.
Whose job is it to keep it stocked?
Bridget.
Hmm. Who we can't even ask about it now anyway.
Maybe we should put off the wedding
until we know what's going on with him.
I agree.
We could have a nice, simple ceremony:
City Hall,
Justice of the Peace,
just us.
I don't know.
Well, if it helps any,
your father and I had a lovely chat
about the two of you getting married.
What did he say?
Just how delighted he was
that you had stepped up to the plate so quick.
He just couldn't wait for you two to be official.
Really?
Oh, yes.
But if we did this now, he'd miss the ceremony.
We're still gonna have a big wedding bash for everyone.
It's just TBA for now.
I know your father is gonna pull through this.
I just know it.
It might take him a little while to come back to us,
but when he does,
he is gonna be so happy
that you fulfilled your commitment to my daughter.
What do you want to do?
I want to do what you want to do.
And you really think this is what he'd want?
Absolutely.
Then let's give it to him.
His father's son through and through.
Hmm.
Hey.
Oh, well, Alice!
I thought you were at the hospital still.
How's George?
Well, he's in a coma, so how good can he be?
I just spoke to Landon.
He said they're still getting married after all this.
Mm. Love conquers all. Isn't it nice?
He said something about you and my father talking about it.
We did. We talked about time and how precious it was.
It doesn't sound much like him.
Well, he was telling me that all he had in his life was...
his work and you and Landon,
and he wanted to bask more in the joys of family,
especially now that your mom had passed away.
He just seemed so thrilled
that his legacy was gonna grow with this baby,
but he wanted it to be legitimate.
Yeah, he would say that part.
Alice, look at me.
Your father is gonna come out of that coma,
and when he does, he is going to burst with pride
that we took charge and made that marriage happen, okay?
Okay.
JUSTICE OF THE PEACE: So with the power vested in me
by the State of California,
I now pronounce you husband and wife
till death do you part.
- Ooh! Mm! - Ah.
[clapping continues]
[dialing]
[line ringing]
- Hey, Ron. - Denise.
Where are you right now?
Outside the house, aren't you?
I shouldn't even tell you this,
but I had those prints checked
from the wine glass you sent me.
Mm-hmm, go on.
You should visit a Dr. McCarthy.
I'll text the address.
Hello, I'm Dr. McCarthy.
Nice to meet you, Doctor.
So what's your problem today?
Less of a problem, more of a question.
Most people sitting in that chair have one or two.
Ask away.
You have a pregnant patient, Stephanie Barton.
She was in here recently with a couple of other people.
Yeah, I remember Stephanie.
How can you when her real name is Samantha Geller?
Uh...
I had her prints checked, so that dog won't hunt.
I know nothing about that.
She's not pregnant at all, is she?
I'm sorry. I'm not permitted to discuss other patients' health.
I hear that, Dr. McCarthy,
but did you hear that someone died when those women moved in,
and another one's in a coma.
I know nothing about that either,
but it sounds like a situation that you should stay away from.
Well, thank you for your time, Doctor.
I'm sure you'll be hearing a lot more about this.
Good day.
[ringtone]
Hello.
This is Dr. McCarthy.
Oh, hi, Doctor.
Is there a problem?
Oh, yeah.
I'm listening.
Some woman just left my office.
She's asking if Stephanie Barton was actually pregnant.
Who?
Did she leave a name?
Yeah, Denise Lewis.
I don't know who that is.
She said Stephanie's not even her real name.
I can tell she thinks the whole thing's a scam.
Damn it.
I'm kinda freaking out.
Just calm down. I'll handle it.
She told me someone involved in the whole thing died,
and someone else is in a coma.
Sorry, Doc. Above your pay grade.
This is not what I signed up for.
No. What you signed up for was to help us falsify a pregnancy.
Now, I'm not an expert on the Hippocratic Oath,
but I'm fairly confident that this kind of thing
doesn't get you named Doctor of the Year.
- Man. - In fact...
it most likely gets your license revoked
or maybe something worse would happen to you.
Worse?
Just keep the doctor-patient confidentiality
and leave this alone.
I told you I'm handling it.
Man.
Just got a disturbing phone call from our good doctor.
Apparently there's a woman
asking not-good questions about us.
Are you serious?
She claims that you're not really pregnant.
How would she know that?
I have no idea,
but I'm sure she doesn't have any proof,
or we would've heard something.
I don't know who she is or how she got onto us,
but we can't afford any more exposure on this job.
So what? You plan on just giving up on the whole thing?
Hell no! We didn't come this far
to leave without a flippin' payday.
How long before you can get into Landon's accounts?
He sent the paperwork to the bank,
combining our accounts.
Should be by tomorrow morning.
Then we finish this thing tonight.
What do you have in mind?
I'm thinking in a little while,
there's going to be a home invasion,
which you'll be handling.
Put me in, Coach. I'm ready to go.
Then what happens?
One last tragedy befalls the Rudolphs.
Alice and Landon will be killed during the break-in.
Is that really necessary?
It's not what I had in mind either,
but we have a problem in our rearview,
and we have to clear the board.
So tomorrow morning,
when everyone's trying to figure out what the hell happened here,
we'll be cleaning out Landon's accounts
and getting as far away from here as possible.
He's in the house right now, but I haven't seen her though.
Do you know where Alice is?
- Here you go. - Thank you.
- Um, hi. - Hi.
Do you have a few minutes to talk? It's important.
I'm sorry I don't know who you are.
It's about your houseguests.
What about them?
Um...
So I know this is going to sound crazy,
but the women living in your house,
they aren't who they say they are.
What are you talking about?
- The older one. - Christine?
Whatever name she's going by these days,
she's a con artist.
I knew something was wrong with them.
How do you know her?
She tried to scam a friend of mine out of her money,
but I couldn't prove it before she disappeared,
any more than I can prove she's scamming your family
for your money right now.
So wait, you don't have any proof of this?
Well, the younger one, I had her fingerprints checked,
and her name, it isn't Stephanie Barton.
It's Samantha Geller.
And that doctor of hers, I asked him a few questions too.
I don't think she's pregnant at all.
My brother married this girl two days ago.
Oh, that's not good.
Why didn't you go to the police with this?
Because you can't have someone arrested
just for going by a different name,
and they haven't done anything illegally to you guys yet.
Nothing provable, anyway.
Well, what am I supposed to do now?
I wish I had the answer to that.
But I just wanted you to know what I know.
I don't want to see you get burned like my friend almost did
or for anyone else to wind up dead.
Dead?
My ex-husband, he got murdered during her last job.
Oh, my God. She killed Bridget.
And I bet she's the reason my father's in a coma.
I'm sorry. I have to go.
[line ringing]
Pick up, pick up, pick up.
Hey, it's Landon. I can't come to the phone right now,
but you know what to do.
- [beep] - Damn it, Landon!
You doing okay?
'Cause you look a little jumpy.
Yeah, well, it's about to get real ugly here very soon.
Yeah. Well, you don't have to be here when it goes down,
so why don't you stop thinking about that?
Hey, we are fast approaching the finish line,
so you need to lose those jitters.
Look at me.
You did a great job.
Now, she had no idea that we knew each other before.
You're really just okay killing Landon and Alice?
It's not the part of the job I look forward to,
but sometimes it's a job.
Best thing to do is do it,
forget about it.
They're just both really good people.
Yeah, who happened to unfortunately
be in the way of our goal.
I've seen that look in your eyes before.
It's usually some small-time grifter
who's looking to get deeper into the game.
You know, if this lifestyle isn't right for you,
now's about the time you usually figure that out.
So what's it gonna be?
[exhales]
I'm fine.
Now go find that husband of yours.
Kiss him goodbye.
[door opens, closes]
You sure it's okay? I don't think we'll be back too late.
Take your time. You two deserve a night out.
Just be sure to bring me back some dessert.
A big one. I'm about to earn it.
Are you all right?
You're just a good man, Landon. That's all.
- I love you. - I love you too.
We'll be back in about an hour.
Don't sweat it.
It'll be done before you get back.
Now where's that new hubby of yours right now?
He'll be going for a jog for the next 30 minutes or so.
Perfect.
Anyone seen his sister?
No, but if she doesn't get back before we get back,
just do Landon and trash the house real good.
We'll take care of Alice when we get back,
if we need to.
- Done. - Okay.
Now, you all enjoy your meal now.
Same to you.
♪♪ [light jazz]
Ooh, yummy! Does this look good!
What are you gonna order?
A little loud, aren't you?
Just loud enough to be alibied,
but not loud enough to be suspicious.
Landon.
- What? - They're gonna kill us.
- What do you mean? - They're con artists!
They're planning to kill us right now.
Are you sure?
I just remembered. What about James?
- What about him? - He doesn't have an alibi.
Yeah, well, he'll have to come up with something on his own,
or he'll find himself in a heap of trouble.
Either way, we'll be long gone before it catches up to us.
Hey!
Alice.
Yeah, that's my real name.
What's yours?
Now what's wrong?
Nothing.
- What? - It's just...
I was really hoping nobody had to die on this job.
Best-laid plans.
I've seen it happen time and time again.
Just be happy that we still have an off-ramp.
STEPHANIE: So what are you gonna do next?
Where will you go?
I never really know that answer.
Doesn't that ever get old?
Not yet.
Well, let me know where you land,
in case I get a job I want to hire you on.
You got it.
- No. - What?
No!
What's wrong?
[police chatter on radio]
[James groaning]
DETECTIVE JANE: Steady.
[sirens blaring]
No! No, no, no, no!
Ohh! Ugh!
[tires screeching]
♪♪ [rock]
Cheers.
- Cheers. - Mmm!
- Thanks for joining us. - Thanks for having me.
This is a nice sports bar.
- How's your dad doing? - He's good, actually.
Came out of the coma yesterday.
He's confused as hell as to what went down,
but he'll be back out here soon, reading his newspaper again.
I'm glad. I'm glad he's okay.
And we're okay too, all 'cause of you.
I just thank God that you stopped those maniacs
from doing what they had planned for you two.
Bastard never knew what hit him.
I can't believe how easily I was duped by that girl.
Well, it just seems like the heart is the most direct path
for these people to worm their way into your life.
I want to find the woman who set this all up.
- I want it so bad. - I know.
I know you do, Landon, but trust me.
Just be glad that you got out of this alive.
DENISE: We have to understand and accept
that there are different kinds of human nature.
There will always be bad people
taking advantage of good people.
WOMAN: Oh, hi! Come on in. I'll be with you in a sec.
Hi.
DENISE: All we can do is hope that one day,
she gets what's coming to her.