1 00:00:12,001 --> 00:00:14,001 [mystical music playing] 2 00:00:16,584 --> 00:00:19,709 [narrator] This is Farzar. 3 00:00:19,793 --> 00:00:23,043 It was a peaceful planet before the evil aliens invaded. 4 00:00:25,918 --> 00:00:30,459 But they were fought back by Renzo, Czar of Farzar. 5 00:00:31,376 --> 00:00:33,418 [upbeat music playing] 6 00:00:38,043 --> 00:00:39,334 [grunts] 7 00:00:49,334 --> 00:00:52,043 [narrator] Then Renzo married Queen Flammy. 8 00:00:52,626 --> 00:00:56,584 Totally for love, not just to gain power, even though she's a slightly older woman. 9 00:00:57,334 --> 00:00:58,918 Where the fuck am I? 10 00:00:59,459 --> 00:01:01,293 [narrator] Anyway, Renzo protected his people 11 00:01:01,376 --> 00:01:04,001 by constructing an energy dome around the human city 12 00:01:04,084 --> 00:01:07,626 to keep out the aliens and their diabolical leader, Bazarack. 13 00:01:07,709 --> 00:01:11,543 I take off my shoes on airplanes. 14 00:01:11,626 --> 00:01:13,584 -[cackles] -[thunder crashes] 15 00:01:13,668 --> 00:01:16,584 [narrator] One day, Renzo will defeat Bazarack 16 00:01:16,668 --> 00:01:19,209 with his god-like strength, rock star hair, 17 00:01:19,293 --> 00:01:21,293 and chiseled, chocolate pecs. 18 00:01:21,376 --> 00:01:23,459 Look at those muscle tits bounce. 19 00:01:23,543 --> 00:01:24,959 Fuck, yeah! 20 00:01:25,043 --> 00:01:28,584 Ah, fuck, yeah! 21 00:01:29,126 --> 00:01:34,501 "I've finally captured you, Bazarack!" "Have mercy on me, mighty Renzo." 22 00:01:34,584 --> 00:01:36,251 "I've got a better idea." 23 00:01:36,334 --> 00:01:38,626 "I'm gonna heat up this clothes hanger on a stove 24 00:01:38,709 --> 00:01:41,334 and shove it up your tiny, yellow ding-dong." 25 00:01:42,293 --> 00:01:48,001 [mocks screaming] 26 00:01:48,084 --> 00:01:53,001 Okay, kids, that's enough state-mandated history for today. Any questions? 27 00:01:53,084 --> 00:01:57,043 Yeah, is this gonna be more like Futurama or Rick and Morty? 28 00:01:57,126 --> 00:02:00,459 Well, actually, it's gonna be more like shut the fuck up! 29 00:02:01,834 --> 00:02:03,293 [kids scream] 30 00:02:04,918 --> 00:02:06,834 [suspenseful music playing] 31 00:02:06,918 --> 00:02:10,543 I am Prince Fichael, son of Renzo. 32 00:02:10,626 --> 00:02:13,543 I am destined to rid the planet of evil. 33 00:02:16,709 --> 00:02:19,709 Today is the day you die! 34 00:02:19,793 --> 00:02:23,043 [screams] 35 00:02:24,584 --> 00:02:27,334 Anyway, today is the day-- 36 00:02:27,418 --> 00:02:30,001 [screams] 37 00:02:30,084 --> 00:02:31,126 Ow! 38 00:02:31,209 --> 00:02:34,209 Uh, he did it to himself. I didn't touch him, Queen Flammy! 39 00:02:34,834 --> 00:02:37,584 I think you know what you have to do. 40 00:02:41,084 --> 00:02:44,126 I was going to say apologize. 41 00:02:44,209 --> 00:02:49,709 Anyway, another fine display of plasma swordsmanship 42 00:02:49,793 --> 00:02:52,543 by our brave son, Fichael. 43 00:02:52,626 --> 00:02:56,376 What a joyous 30th birthday celebration. 44 00:02:59,043 --> 00:03:02,001 Time to open Mommy's presents! 45 00:03:04,209 --> 00:03:07,543 Gold-plated socks, gold-plated gold bars, 46 00:03:07,626 --> 00:03:08,709 gold-plated puppy. 47 00:03:08,793 --> 00:03:11,918 Mom, I know we're rich, but I'd prefer a living pet. 48 00:03:12,001 --> 00:03:14,084 What's next? A gold-plated girlfriend? 49 00:03:14,168 --> 00:03:15,918 [chuckles] No. 50 00:03:16,001 --> 00:03:18,293 -Get the fuck out of here! -[wheels squeak] 51 00:03:19,168 --> 00:03:22,376 Sorry to interrupt, sir, but the energy dome has been vandalized. 52 00:03:22,459 --> 00:03:23,626 [suspenseful music plays] 53 00:03:23,709 --> 00:03:25,751 That is straight-up offensive. 54 00:03:25,834 --> 00:03:27,459 Where's my goddamn reach-around? 55 00:03:27,543 --> 00:03:29,459 It appears to be the work of Bazarack. 56 00:03:29,543 --> 00:03:31,209 [suspenseful music plays] 57 00:03:31,293 --> 00:03:33,751 I hate that mustard-colored fuck. 58 00:03:33,834 --> 00:03:36,418 Can someone please find Bazarack and bring me his head? 59 00:03:36,501 --> 00:03:38,459 I'm so mad I could do a backflip. 60 00:03:38,543 --> 00:03:40,043 [grunts] Ow! 61 00:03:40,543 --> 00:03:42,918 I landed on my goddamn Ski-Doo keys! 62 00:03:43,001 --> 00:03:44,834 Everyone who saw that, kill yourself. 63 00:03:49,251 --> 00:03:50,126 Fun party. 64 00:03:50,209 --> 00:03:53,626 But what I really want for my birthday is to be a general. 65 00:03:53,709 --> 00:03:56,751 Dad, I ask you every year and you never let me. 66 00:03:56,834 --> 00:03:59,418 [gasps] I'm gonna hold my breath till you make me a general. 67 00:03:59,501 --> 00:04:03,293 Fine. Hold your breath, you dumbass. See if I, uh… 68 00:04:03,376 --> 00:04:04,834 Hereby make you a General. 69 00:04:04,918 --> 00:04:08,043 Yes! Do I get my own team of soldiers? 70 00:04:08,126 --> 00:04:11,459 Sure, I'll put a quote-unquote "team" together for you. 71 00:04:11,543 --> 00:04:14,793 Cool. Just like how I'm your quote-unquote "son"? 72 00:04:14,876 --> 00:04:17,876 Oh, I can't wait to tell all my quote-unquote "friends." 73 00:04:18,418 --> 00:04:19,501 Scootie, guess what? 74 00:04:19,584 --> 00:04:22,459 My dad's putting together a special team for me. I want you to be on it! 75 00:04:22,543 --> 00:04:24,876 How does Lieutenant BFF sound? 76 00:04:24,959 --> 00:04:26,751 Like a piece of shit Disney show. 77 00:04:27,251 --> 00:04:30,376 -You ordered the Snuffle Snart? -[squeaks] 78 00:04:30,459 --> 00:04:33,459 Scootie, you got me a living pet for my birthday! 79 00:04:33,543 --> 00:04:35,668 Nope. It's for me. 80 00:04:36,876 --> 00:04:39,834 [dial-up modem sounds playing] 81 00:04:39,918 --> 00:04:42,793 So about the team… [inhales through teeth] 82 00:04:42,876 --> 00:04:45,001 …guess we'll be nixing the drug tests. 83 00:04:45,084 --> 00:04:48,376 Will you shut up? I'm trying to watch Lieutenant BFF. 84 00:04:48,459 --> 00:04:49,793 [laughs] 85 00:04:49,876 --> 00:04:52,168 I didn't know you could say the N-word on Disney. 86 00:04:55,376 --> 00:04:59,543 Good morning, Special Hostile Assault Team! 87 00:05:00,251 --> 00:05:02,251 S.H.A.T.? Our name is S.H.A.T.? 88 00:05:02,334 --> 00:05:05,126 The past tense of shit? Great name, Fichael. 89 00:05:05,209 --> 00:05:08,834 Thanks. I'm your leader, General Fichael. 90 00:05:08,918 --> 00:05:09,751 Roll call! 91 00:05:09,834 --> 00:05:12,168 Mal Skullcruncher? 92 00:05:12,251 --> 00:05:13,751 Reporting for duty, sir. 93 00:05:13,834 --> 00:05:16,543 I've been on over 700 missions in the alien wasteland. 94 00:05:16,626 --> 00:05:18,501 Sanchez! Don't be a hero! 95 00:05:18,584 --> 00:05:21,084 Operation Delta Brimstone, '72. 96 00:05:21,168 --> 00:05:24,293 We were pinned down and I had to eat my whole goddamn platoon. 97 00:05:24,376 --> 00:05:28,334 I was shitting dog tags and little pieces of Sanchez for months. 98 00:05:28,418 --> 00:05:32,084 Yeah, you can just say, "Here." Val Skullcruncher. 99 00:05:32,168 --> 00:05:33,209 Present. 100 00:05:33,293 --> 00:05:37,293 My preschool class calls me Ms. Skullcruncher. [chuckles] 101 00:05:37,376 --> 00:05:40,001 Except for Tina, who calls me Ms. Skullcunt. 102 00:05:40,084 --> 00:05:41,501 [laughs] 103 00:05:41,584 --> 00:05:43,584 Tina sounds funny. Is she single? 104 00:05:44,626 --> 00:05:46,793 What? I have a six-year-old nephew 105 00:05:46,876 --> 00:05:49,918 -who I'm trying to get laid. -Wow, the teacher is cute! 106 00:05:50,001 --> 00:05:53,626 I hope you like foot jobs. I'm pretty sure the ugly one controls the arms. 107 00:05:53,709 --> 00:05:55,001 Barry Barris? 108 00:05:55,084 --> 00:05:58,376 Whoa! You're, like, Farzar's top scientist. 109 00:05:59,001 --> 00:06:01,668 Yes. Well, I was until my nervous breakdown. 110 00:06:01,751 --> 00:06:03,418 Now, I make stuff like this. 111 00:06:04,501 --> 00:06:06,459 Me Billy. Hey! 112 00:06:07,043 --> 00:06:11,043 Look at his little bird beak! Billy, welcome to the team. 113 00:06:12,793 --> 00:06:14,793 Billy on team. 114 00:06:14,876 --> 00:06:16,251 Billy happy. 115 00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:19,001 [grunting] 116 00:06:19,084 --> 00:06:21,168 Hey, Doc, can you do something about that? 117 00:06:21,251 --> 00:06:25,209 Right. No, Billy, you must grip the shaft tighter or you'll never climax. 118 00:06:25,293 --> 00:06:27,501 Anyway, listen up, team. 119 00:06:27,584 --> 00:06:31,168 You're going outside the dome into the barren alien wasteland 120 00:06:31,251 --> 00:06:33,501 on a dangerous and vital mission 121 00:06:33,584 --> 00:06:37,334 to bring back smooth rocks for my pretty daddy's koi pond. 122 00:06:37,418 --> 00:06:41,001 Oh, I see. Your daddy's giving us bullshit assignments 123 00:06:41,084 --> 00:06:42,626 because he thinks we're a joke. 124 00:06:42,709 --> 00:06:45,459 Who cares? I don't wanna go out there and fight those crazy aliens. 125 00:06:45,543 --> 00:06:47,168 I used to be human, you know. 126 00:06:47,251 --> 00:06:49,876 Every time I go out there, I lose a piece of myself. 127 00:06:49,959 --> 00:06:52,376 All right, you aliens, come and get some! 128 00:06:53,251 --> 00:06:55,209 All right, you aliens, come and-- 129 00:06:56,543 --> 00:06:57,501 All right, you-- 130 00:06:58,168 --> 00:06:59,626 Ha ha, you missed! 131 00:07:00,168 --> 00:07:03,584 Oh, yeah. 132 00:07:05,834 --> 00:07:07,001 [Flammy] Mm. 133 00:07:07,084 --> 00:07:08,668 Twerk them tits. 134 00:07:08,751 --> 00:07:10,126 Oh, yes, come on! 135 00:07:10,209 --> 00:07:12,751 You know what Mommy likes. Oh, yeah. 136 00:07:12,834 --> 00:07:15,793 That's warming my whisker biscuit. [laughs] 137 00:07:15,876 --> 00:07:17,084 [trills] 138 00:07:17,168 --> 00:07:18,168 [clears throat] 139 00:07:18,251 --> 00:07:19,084 Cough. 140 00:07:20,251 --> 00:07:22,834 Sorry, sonny, we didn't see you there. [chuckles] 141 00:07:22,918 --> 00:07:26,001 Your father and I are still like young lovers. 142 00:07:26,084 --> 00:07:29,376 We were just about to have our sunset sloppies. 143 00:07:29,459 --> 00:07:30,834 [both chuckle] 144 00:07:31,584 --> 00:07:36,459 It's dry, Fichael. So dry. I'm afraid it's gonna start a fire. 145 00:07:36,543 --> 00:07:39,751 When I stick it in, it sounds like someone making keys. 146 00:07:40,584 --> 00:07:42,584 Dad, I just wanted to clear up something. 147 00:07:42,668 --> 00:07:45,626 The guys on my team say you think we're a joke. 148 00:07:45,709 --> 00:07:48,834 What? My perfect son, a joke? 149 00:07:48,918 --> 00:07:52,751 Of course you're a goddamn joke. Didn't you notice I named you S.H.A.T. Squad? 150 00:07:52,834 --> 00:07:55,334 What? But I'm a general! 151 00:07:55,418 --> 00:07:58,501 I bought that general outfit from Party City, you idiot. 152 00:07:58,584 --> 00:08:00,168 You didn't see the medals were printed on 153 00:08:00,251 --> 00:08:02,709 and it came with a mask and a trick-or-treat pumpkin? 154 00:08:04,043 --> 00:08:05,043 And? 155 00:08:05,126 --> 00:08:07,501 I made you a fake general to shut you up. 156 00:08:07,584 --> 00:08:11,459 You think you could be an actual general? Ha! You've never even left the city. 157 00:08:11,543 --> 00:08:15,209 I can't. You know I have fatallergies. 158 00:08:15,293 --> 00:08:18,751 Mom says if I breathe pollen, my organs will disintegrate. 159 00:08:18,834 --> 00:08:20,626 You still believe that crap? 160 00:08:20,709 --> 00:08:24,168 Your mom made that up to keep you in the city because she's overprotective. 161 00:08:24,251 --> 00:08:28,084 You're her only son. The parts needed to make another shriveled up 12 flarsecs ago. 162 00:08:28,168 --> 00:08:30,751 I don't have fatallergies? 163 00:08:30,834 --> 00:08:33,418 So I can leave the city and go on that mission? 164 00:08:33,501 --> 00:08:35,001 No, you might get hurt. 165 00:08:35,084 --> 00:08:38,084 If you do, your mother will divorce me. I'm not losing my throne. 166 00:08:38,168 --> 00:08:42,584 So that's the only reason you care if I live or die. Got it. 167 00:08:42,668 --> 00:08:47,168 I'm going on a mission, and it's not to bring back rocks for your koi pond. 168 00:08:47,251 --> 00:08:50,168 I'm bringing back Bazarack's head! 169 00:08:50,709 --> 00:08:53,001 Are you out of your goddamn mind? 170 00:08:53,084 --> 00:08:56,251 My best men haven't been able to kill Bazarack. I forbid it! 171 00:08:56,334 --> 00:08:58,543 You can't tell me what to do! 172 00:08:58,626 --> 00:09:01,584 I'm not a 29-year-old child anymore. 173 00:09:01,668 --> 00:09:04,793 I'm 30 years old, finally a man. 174 00:09:04,876 --> 00:09:07,168 Oh, and one more thing… 175 00:09:09,668 --> 00:09:12,626 [groans] Fine. But you're getting Raisinets. 176 00:09:13,501 --> 00:09:14,793 Where the fuck am I? 177 00:09:15,626 --> 00:09:17,876 [adventurous music playing] 178 00:09:31,334 --> 00:09:33,543 ♪ Farzar ♪ 179 00:09:38,626 --> 00:09:41,834 S.H.A.T. Squad, the koi pond mission is off. 180 00:09:41,918 --> 00:09:43,959 Instead, we're gonna kill Bazarack. 181 00:09:44,043 --> 00:09:45,626 -What?! -Yes! 182 00:09:45,709 --> 00:09:46,876 I eat my own hair. 183 00:09:47,418 --> 00:09:49,376 There's no way I'm going on this mission. 184 00:09:49,459 --> 00:09:53,668 The only human part of me left is my man part, and I don't wanna lose that. 185 00:09:53,751 --> 00:09:55,709 I don't like to brag about it, but it's big. 186 00:09:55,793 --> 00:09:58,626 Well, if you care more about your dick than me-- 187 00:09:58,709 --> 00:10:01,418 I do. I don't like to brag about it, but it's big, by the way. 188 00:10:01,501 --> 00:10:03,959 Fine, we'll kill Bazarack without you then. 189 00:10:04,459 --> 00:10:08,251 Barry, we're gonna need some special weapons for this mission. 190 00:10:08,334 --> 00:10:09,876 Weapons? I'm your man. 191 00:10:11,209 --> 00:10:14,793 Just drop this capsule into liquid and it hydrates into a bouncy castle. 192 00:10:14,876 --> 00:10:16,543 What good is a bouncy castle? 193 00:10:16,626 --> 00:10:20,376 How else do you get your neighbors to take off their shoes so you can sniff them? 194 00:10:21,168 --> 00:10:22,876 Got any shit here that kills things? 195 00:10:22,959 --> 00:10:25,959 Sure. Just blow into this and it causes instant death. 196 00:10:26,043 --> 00:10:31,251 Now we're talking, Barry! I can't wait to kill some aliens with this. Ooh! 197 00:10:31,334 --> 00:10:33,584 Oh, it's not for aliens. It's for you. 198 00:10:33,668 --> 00:10:36,334 When you get torn apart by some ungodly creature out there, 199 00:10:36,418 --> 00:10:38,501 you'll be begging for the reaper's sweet release. 200 00:10:38,584 --> 00:10:40,709 I call it the sui-slide whistle. 201 00:10:40,793 --> 00:10:41,959 [melancholy tone] 202 00:10:42,834 --> 00:10:44,084 Damn it. I should be dead. 203 00:10:44,168 --> 00:10:45,376 Oh. [chuckles] 204 00:10:45,459 --> 00:10:46,584 Needs batteries. 205 00:10:46,668 --> 00:10:50,293 Okay. What does this watch do? 206 00:10:50,376 --> 00:10:52,293 It opens up wormholes. 207 00:10:53,001 --> 00:10:54,626 But only to my mother's shower. 208 00:10:54,709 --> 00:10:57,043 So it's broken? 209 00:10:57,126 --> 00:10:58,834 No. I am. 210 00:11:02,376 --> 00:11:06,084 So this is outside. It's glorious! 211 00:11:13,459 --> 00:11:17,334 Hey, everybody. I'm little Bob Dukie. This is my Little Bob Dukie dance. 212 00:11:18,876 --> 00:11:21,126 So who knows how to find Bazarack? 213 00:11:21,209 --> 00:11:26,793 So no one going to acknowledge Little Bob Dukie, yeah? 214 00:11:27,626 --> 00:11:31,084 Maybe that pack of snarling aliens with fangs can give us directions. 215 00:11:31,168 --> 00:11:32,334 Hey, guys! 216 00:11:32,418 --> 00:11:33,876 [Mal grunting] 217 00:11:33,959 --> 00:11:36,293 [aliens snarling] 218 00:11:36,376 --> 00:11:41,543 Kids, today we are doing an educational field trip with my sister. 219 00:11:41,626 --> 00:11:45,001 We can learn so many things out here. 220 00:11:45,084 --> 00:11:51,209 [gasps] Oh! Look! A is for artery. B is for brains. C is for-- 221 00:11:51,293 --> 00:11:52,126 Cunt? 222 00:11:52,209 --> 00:11:54,001 Is it cunt, Ms. Skullcunt? 223 00:11:54,084 --> 00:11:56,126 Yeah, okay, Tina, we need to talk. 224 00:11:56,209 --> 00:11:59,334 Yeah, you single? My friend's nephew is looking for some trim. 225 00:11:59,418 --> 00:12:01,543 Billy, help! 226 00:12:01,626 --> 00:12:05,334 Billy pick flowers for best friend. Aha! 227 00:12:05,418 --> 00:12:08,668 Thank you, you fucked-up monster. [sneezes] 228 00:12:09,918 --> 00:12:11,251 Billy sad. 229 00:12:13,709 --> 00:12:16,459 [aliens snarling] 230 00:12:26,543 --> 00:12:28,501 Hey, asshole, those are my kills! 231 00:12:28,584 --> 00:12:31,543 I get the most kills on every mission. I had this! 232 00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:34,834 ♪ R is for ripping off my face ♪ 233 00:12:35,751 --> 00:12:38,668 ♪ S is for sucked out eyeball ♪ 234 00:12:38,751 --> 00:12:39,918 [kids scream] 235 00:12:40,001 --> 00:12:42,293 Scootie! I knew you'd come. 236 00:12:42,376 --> 00:12:45,459 Yeah, I knew you'd die without me and I'd feel guilty skipping your funerals. 237 00:12:45,543 --> 00:12:47,626 That's why I bought this from my Snuffle Snart dealer. 238 00:12:47,709 --> 00:12:50,751 A map to Bazarack's hidden base. 239 00:12:51,959 --> 00:12:54,251 The way to Bazarack is through the nether regions, 240 00:12:54,334 --> 00:12:58,168 which means we'll have to outwit the Intellectoids. 241 00:12:58,751 --> 00:13:00,668 We is the Intellectoids, 242 00:13:00,751 --> 00:13:03,209 but I guess you done knew that since you is too. 243 00:13:04,959 --> 00:13:06,918 Yeah, these guys are smart, all right. 244 00:13:07,001 --> 00:13:09,501 Wait a minute. What's the new password? 245 00:13:09,584 --> 00:13:12,376 Password used to be my name, but I kept forgetting it. 246 00:13:12,459 --> 00:13:15,918 Don't tell 'em the old password! What if they came back yesterday? 247 00:13:16,001 --> 00:13:18,043 Oh, you didn't hear? It is yesterday. 248 00:13:18,126 --> 00:13:20,168 Really? Well, shit. Come on in. 249 00:13:20,251 --> 00:13:22,293 Great. Where should I hang this fake head? 250 00:13:22,376 --> 00:13:24,293 Humans! Kill them sum bitches. 251 00:13:26,418 --> 00:13:27,709 Cool, slide whistle! 252 00:13:28,293 --> 00:13:29,168 [melancholy tone] 253 00:13:30,834 --> 00:13:32,459 -Cool. Slide whistle. -[melancholy tone] 254 00:13:33,459 --> 00:13:35,376 -Cool! Slide whistle! -[melancholy tone] 255 00:13:35,876 --> 00:13:37,709 -Cool. Slide whistle. -[melancholy tone] 256 00:13:38,293 --> 00:13:40,293 -Cool! Slide whistle! -[melancholy tone] 257 00:13:40,376 --> 00:13:42,043 -Cool. Slide whistle. -[melancholy tone] 258 00:13:42,126 --> 00:13:44,001 -Cool. Slide whistle. -[melancholy tone] 259 00:13:44,084 --> 00:13:46,043 -Cool! Slide whistle! -[melancholy tone] 260 00:13:46,751 --> 00:13:49,126 Oh my God. All my friends are dead. 261 00:13:50,043 --> 00:13:51,418 Cool. Slide whistle. 262 00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:52,793 [melancholy tone] 263 00:13:53,459 --> 00:13:56,251 Fichael takes the lead on kills! 264 00:13:56,334 --> 00:13:58,918 Mal, looks like you've got some catching up to-- 265 00:13:59,501 --> 00:14:00,709 Would you stop playing around? 266 00:14:00,793 --> 00:14:03,793 If we're gonna have a chance against Bazarack, we've gotta get serious. 267 00:14:03,876 --> 00:14:05,293 Do you know how scary that dude is? 268 00:14:05,376 --> 00:14:07,793 [ominous music plays] 269 00:14:08,959 --> 00:14:11,459 You wanted to see me, Lord Bazarack? 270 00:14:11,543 --> 00:14:14,043 Yes. I need to know 271 00:14:14,126 --> 00:14:15,293 how do I look? 272 00:14:15,376 --> 00:14:16,793 How do you look, sir? 273 00:14:16,876 --> 00:14:21,168 On a scale of one to ten, how intimidating do I look? 274 00:14:21,251 --> 00:14:22,709 Um, four? 275 00:14:22,793 --> 00:14:24,501 Four? See! 276 00:14:24,584 --> 00:14:28,626 I told you fuckers we've got a real problem with my intimidation factor. 277 00:14:28,709 --> 00:14:32,876 If we don't handle this, it's going to ruin my entire brand. 278 00:14:32,959 --> 00:14:35,001 Why do you care how you look, sir? 279 00:14:35,084 --> 00:14:37,834 Perception is reality, mister! 280 00:14:37,918 --> 00:14:41,668 You think the human city could be taken over by a four out of ten? 281 00:14:41,751 --> 00:14:44,709 I forgot you like fours. I was at your wedding. 282 00:14:44,793 --> 00:14:49,209 Ooh, I'm a sassy bitch! Now let's get to work, you dicks. 283 00:14:51,126 --> 00:14:54,584 You better make my cheekbones fierce, or I'll pinch your purple tits off. 284 00:14:54,668 --> 00:14:58,334 Where's my eyebrow plucker? I want to look pissed off all the time. 285 00:14:58,418 --> 00:15:00,793 Even when I'm happy. Where'd my assistant go? 286 00:15:01,501 --> 00:15:04,709 Right here, Lord Bazarack. There's news from the slums. 287 00:15:04,793 --> 00:15:06,501 Well, what is it, Clitoris? 288 00:15:06,584 --> 00:15:09,126 Again, it's Clitaris. 289 00:15:09,209 --> 00:15:12,918 Are you sure? Because you are red and swollen and I can never find you. 290 00:15:13,001 --> 00:15:14,418 [rim shot plays] 291 00:15:15,376 --> 00:15:16,793 Get away from my drums! 292 00:15:16,876 --> 00:15:20,376 Apparently the Czar's son is on his way here to assassinate you. 293 00:15:20,459 --> 00:15:23,876 Holy hell! We've got to redecorate this whole base! 294 00:15:23,959 --> 00:15:26,876 I'm talking fake spider webs. All that scary shit. 295 00:15:26,959 --> 00:15:30,376 Clitaris, get your gargoyle-looking, fat fucking wife in here. 296 00:15:30,459 --> 00:15:33,168 Better change my name to Sassarack. Am I right? 297 00:15:34,376 --> 00:15:36,168 Where's my fucking rim shot? 298 00:15:39,668 --> 00:15:43,626 Okay, the map says we've got to make it through the very bad, bad, bad forest. 299 00:15:43,709 --> 00:15:46,251 Oh, this forest is cursed! 300 00:15:46,334 --> 00:15:50,084 My skin is covered in bumps and my breath has turned to smoke. 301 00:15:50,168 --> 00:15:54,876 -It's called being cold, you spoiled shit. -Billy not like it here. 302 00:15:56,209 --> 00:15:57,543 Billy scared! 303 00:15:58,168 --> 00:15:59,043 Oh, shit! 304 00:16:02,626 --> 00:16:04,668 Back off, motherfucker, that's my kill! 305 00:16:04,751 --> 00:16:06,834 It's just a baby! 306 00:16:06,918 --> 00:16:08,709 What's your name, little guy? 307 00:16:08,793 --> 00:16:10,251 Zobo! 308 00:16:10,334 --> 00:16:12,501 Aw. Zobo want a rattle? 309 00:16:12,584 --> 00:16:14,876 Suckle that, you little shit. [laughs] 310 00:16:14,959 --> 00:16:16,209 Oh, stop it, Mal. 311 00:16:17,334 --> 00:16:22,168 I'm Big Bob Dukie. Have y'all seen my boy around? [exclaims] 312 00:16:24,751 --> 00:16:28,626 [giggles] I think he's cute! Yes, you are. 313 00:16:28,709 --> 00:16:30,793 You are a good guy, Fichael. 314 00:16:30,876 --> 00:16:31,918 Oh, gross. 315 00:16:32,001 --> 00:16:35,376 If you pork this dork, you'd better stay on your side of the vagina. 316 00:16:35,459 --> 00:16:38,251 Trust me. That won't be a problem. 317 00:16:38,334 --> 00:16:40,668 I have a shockingly slender penis. 318 00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:43,834 [action music playing] 319 00:16:45,168 --> 00:16:46,168 [growls] 320 00:16:48,293 --> 00:16:49,918 [screams] 321 00:16:51,001 --> 00:16:52,251 [roars] 322 00:16:57,876 --> 00:16:59,168 Is this hell? 323 00:17:03,876 --> 00:17:06,584 S.H.A.T. Squad, mission accomplished! 324 00:17:06,668 --> 00:17:11,043 It was a long journey, but we finally found Bazarack's base. 325 00:17:11,126 --> 00:17:13,376 [Mal] This is our base, dumbass. 326 00:17:13,459 --> 00:17:16,418 That horse-hung trash can led us in a giant circle. 327 00:17:16,501 --> 00:17:17,834 Give me that map! 328 00:17:17,918 --> 00:17:19,459 This… this isn't even a map. 329 00:17:19,543 --> 00:17:23,793 It's just some shitty drawing of cartoon boobies. You betrayed us. 330 00:17:23,876 --> 00:17:27,084 He wouldn't ever do that. Ri… Right, Scootie? 331 00:17:27,168 --> 00:17:28,168 She's right, Fichael. 332 00:17:28,251 --> 00:17:31,959 Your father offered me ten Snuffle Snarts if I kept you away from Bazarack's base. 333 00:17:32,043 --> 00:17:34,209 You betrayed me for Snuffle Snarts? 334 00:17:34,293 --> 00:17:37,959 You don't secretly have a huge dick. You secretly are a huge dick! 335 00:17:38,043 --> 00:17:40,876 Sorry, Fichael. I'll never turn my back on you again. 336 00:17:43,834 --> 00:17:44,834 [squeals] 337 00:17:44,918 --> 00:17:46,126 [Fichael] A cocktopus! 338 00:17:47,626 --> 00:17:48,543 [Mal] Oh! 339 00:17:48,626 --> 00:17:50,501 Scootie, help! 340 00:17:51,418 --> 00:17:52,709 -[squeals] -[Mal screams] 341 00:17:53,834 --> 00:17:58,793 Hi! My family and I are looking for new friends. 342 00:18:00,293 --> 00:18:03,126 [smooth rap music playing] 343 00:18:08,543 --> 00:18:11,876 Class, this is a very good time to learn about digestion. 344 00:18:12,376 --> 00:18:15,293 Oh, look at that. Guess you already have. Oh, well. 345 00:18:15,376 --> 00:18:18,793 -We've got to do something quick. -Oh, uh, "quickly." It's an adverb. 346 00:18:18,876 --> 00:18:20,251 Shut the fuck up, Val! 347 00:18:20,334 --> 00:18:24,709 Do what? All I got is this worthless dehydrated bounce house capsule. 348 00:18:25,334 --> 00:18:26,793 Oh, crap. I dropped it. 349 00:18:31,084 --> 00:18:34,876 -You know, since it's here… -All right, five minutes. 350 00:18:34,959 --> 00:18:37,043 [all laughing] 351 00:18:37,126 --> 00:18:39,543 [ominous music plays] 352 00:18:39,626 --> 00:18:42,418 You two, spray more of that fake blood on the walls. 353 00:18:42,918 --> 00:18:46,043 My bone throne. Excellent. 354 00:18:47,251 --> 00:18:50,376 Holy piss, this thing is uncomfortable. 355 00:18:50,459 --> 00:18:52,084 Does it have to be so hard? 356 00:18:52,168 --> 00:18:54,043 It's made of bones, sir. 357 00:18:54,126 --> 00:18:57,126 Well, let's bring your wife in here. She makes bones soft. 358 00:18:57,918 --> 00:18:59,626 [rim shot plays] 359 00:18:59,709 --> 00:19:01,168 A beat late, but I'll take it. 360 00:19:01,251 --> 00:19:03,418 Speaking of late, where the fuck is Prince Fichael? 361 00:19:03,501 --> 00:19:05,626 That fog machine's gonna run out of juice. 362 00:19:06,126 --> 00:19:09,459 Screw it. You know what? Just go capture him and bring him here. 363 00:19:09,543 --> 00:19:11,334 [laughing] 364 00:19:13,668 --> 00:19:15,876 I'm being captured. [laughs] 365 00:19:15,959 --> 00:19:16,793 Whatever. 366 00:19:17,876 --> 00:19:19,793 [Renzo screams] 367 00:19:19,876 --> 00:19:20,751 [Flammy moans] 368 00:19:20,834 --> 00:19:22,251 [screams] 369 00:19:24,668 --> 00:19:25,584 Thank God, you… 370 00:19:26,084 --> 00:19:27,959 I mean, how dare you interrupt us? 371 00:19:28,043 --> 00:19:30,793 Sorry, sir. We just received word from the nether regions. 372 00:19:30,876 --> 00:19:33,001 Your son has been captured by Bazarack. 373 00:19:33,084 --> 00:19:36,043 -What? -He said it's time to go to Costco. 374 00:19:36,126 --> 00:19:37,168 [grunts] 375 00:19:37,251 --> 00:19:40,334 Pick me up some brownie brittle while you're there, honey. [chuckles] 376 00:19:40,418 --> 00:19:41,584 How did this happen? 377 00:19:41,668 --> 00:19:44,584 I sent that Snart-head cyborg to keep Fichael away from Bazarack. 378 00:19:44,668 --> 00:19:47,251 We gotta get Fichael back here before my wife's done shopping. 379 00:19:47,334 --> 00:19:53,126 Where the hell is the turkey jerky? I can't find shit in this store. 380 00:19:53,209 --> 00:19:57,168 [ominous music plays] 381 00:19:59,959 --> 00:20:02,876 Son of Renzo, 382 00:20:02,959 --> 00:20:08,126 cower before Bazarack Killdiedeath! 383 00:20:08,209 --> 00:20:11,793 So your last name is Killdiedeath? That sounds like a made-up name. 384 00:20:11,876 --> 00:20:14,376 No, that is my real name. 385 00:20:14,459 --> 00:20:17,543 Why is "Finklestein" written on the elastic of your tighty-whities? 386 00:20:18,543 --> 00:20:21,168 Do you have to do that now?! Ah! 387 00:20:21,251 --> 00:20:23,001 I'm stuck to the floor. Help! 388 00:20:24,626 --> 00:20:26,334 Get away! Stop making me look silly 389 00:20:26,418 --> 00:20:29,751 in front of this guy who's here to kill me for some reason. 390 00:20:29,834 --> 00:20:33,418 For some reason? It's my destiny to rid this planet of evil. 391 00:20:33,501 --> 00:20:35,418 You think I'm evil? [chuckles] 392 00:20:35,501 --> 00:20:37,751 Your daddy is the evil one, mister! 393 00:20:37,834 --> 00:20:40,501 He invaded our planet, pushed us off our land, 394 00:20:40,584 --> 00:20:42,459 ravaged our resources. 395 00:20:42,543 --> 00:20:45,376 What? You invaded our planet. 396 00:20:45,459 --> 00:20:47,709 Actually, he's right. 397 00:20:47,793 --> 00:20:51,626 Our history books are all lies. Your dad wrote them. 398 00:20:51,709 --> 00:20:56,001 Also, you humans kidnap and eat our babies. 399 00:20:56,084 --> 00:20:58,376 What? There is no way-- 400 00:20:58,459 --> 00:21:00,543 Well, yeah, we eat their babies. 401 00:21:00,626 --> 00:21:03,084 They're delicious, nutritious, and high in omega threes. 402 00:21:03,168 --> 00:21:07,001 They're like avocados with softer skin, but they scream when you eat 'em. 403 00:21:07,084 --> 00:21:08,959 I… I just can't believe it. 404 00:21:09,043 --> 00:21:10,543 [laughs] 405 00:21:10,626 --> 00:21:14,043 But you will when you see this. Curtains! 406 00:21:15,584 --> 00:21:18,084 ♪ Your daddy is an evil asshole ♪ 407 00:21:18,168 --> 00:21:21,043 ♪ There's no way That wicked prick has a soul ♪ 408 00:21:21,126 --> 00:21:24,001 ♪ He's meaner than a troll His heart is black as coal ♪ 409 00:21:24,084 --> 00:21:26,668 ♪ Your daddy is an evil asshole ♪ 410 00:21:26,751 --> 00:21:29,418 ♪ He turned our corpses into sleds ♪ 411 00:21:29,501 --> 00:21:32,251 ♪ He played beach volleyball With our heads ♪ 412 00:21:32,334 --> 00:21:34,751 ♪ He crucifies our pets ♪ 413 00:21:34,834 --> 00:21:37,168 ♪ Eats our babies with croquettes ♪ 414 00:21:37,751 --> 00:21:40,209 ♪ We had wealth until he stole it ♪ 415 00:21:40,293 --> 00:21:43,376 ♪ To make himself a goddamn toilet ♪ 416 00:21:43,459 --> 00:21:45,959 ♪ He grinds our grandmas into paste ♪ 417 00:21:46,043 --> 00:21:48,918 ♪ Just to exfoliate his fucking face ♪ 418 00:21:49,001 --> 00:21:53,418 See? Daddy evil. But don't just take my word for it. 419 00:21:54,001 --> 00:21:56,668 ♪ He tied my cock into a knot ♪ 420 00:21:56,751 --> 00:21:59,418 ♪ He took a shit in my mailbox ♪ 421 00:21:59,501 --> 00:22:02,168 ♪ He kicked my wife in the twat ♪ 422 00:22:02,251 --> 00:22:07,001 ♪ He parked in my handicapped spot! ♪ 423 00:22:07,084 --> 00:22:09,251 ♪ Your daddy is an evil asshole! ♪ 424 00:22:11,293 --> 00:22:12,126 Ah! 425 00:22:12,209 --> 00:22:15,584 I can't believe it. My dad is evil. 426 00:22:15,668 --> 00:22:18,043 That means we're the bad guys. 427 00:22:18,126 --> 00:22:19,084 -Yep. -Pretty much. 428 00:22:19,168 --> 00:22:21,709 Yeah, even Billy knew that. Yes. 429 00:22:21,793 --> 00:22:25,376 No! How can this be happening? I don't want to be a bad guy. 430 00:22:25,459 --> 00:22:27,293 Then you only have one option. 431 00:22:27,376 --> 00:22:29,751 Be a good guy. Join me. 432 00:22:31,293 --> 00:22:33,001 [cackles] 433 00:22:33,084 --> 00:22:35,334 [thunder rumbles] 434 00:22:35,418 --> 00:22:38,959 Enough with the lightning! Now we're just trying too hard. 435 00:22:39,834 --> 00:22:43,501 What the hell are you doing? You can't betray your dad and join Bazarack. 436 00:22:43,584 --> 00:22:46,293 Sure I can. My dad lied to me my whole life. 437 00:22:46,376 --> 00:22:50,501 I know he can be a little… Well, a lot evil. But he's still your dad. 438 00:22:50,584 --> 00:22:53,376 I think you could get him to change. He does care about you. 439 00:22:53,459 --> 00:22:57,084 The only thing he cares about is his precious throne. 440 00:22:57,168 --> 00:22:58,459 He thinks I'm a joke. 441 00:22:58,543 --> 00:23:00,334 Who cares about your dad? 442 00:23:00,418 --> 00:23:03,709 You got me, your new BFF! 443 00:23:03,793 --> 00:23:06,584 Bazarack Francine Finklestein. 444 00:23:06,668 --> 00:23:09,626 Don't tell him my middle name! Let's get you ready 445 00:23:09,709 --> 00:23:10,626 for war. 446 00:23:12,168 --> 00:23:16,126 See? An angular nose really brings up your fright factor. 447 00:23:16,209 --> 00:23:18,001 Wow. Thanks. 448 00:23:18,084 --> 00:23:21,084 Nothing is too good for my new general. 449 00:23:21,168 --> 00:23:24,334 You're making me a general? Like a real general? 450 00:23:24,418 --> 00:23:27,626 Like I get a uniform with real medals that dangle? 451 00:23:27,709 --> 00:23:31,543 Anything you want. Just lose the watch. It clashes with your terror tassels. 452 00:23:31,626 --> 00:23:35,751 Fine by me. It only opens a wormhole to some old lady's shower anyway. 453 00:23:35,834 --> 00:23:37,376 Wormholes? Hmm. 454 00:23:37,459 --> 00:23:42,251 I'll tinker with this, if you don't mind. We attack at dawn! You're a warrior now. 455 00:23:42,334 --> 00:23:44,751 Yeah! I'm a warrior! 456 00:23:44,834 --> 00:23:47,376 Now, let's take care of that bush, General. 457 00:23:47,459 --> 00:23:50,168 Nothing says fierce like a hairless schmeckle. 458 00:23:52,709 --> 00:23:55,251 Okay, you're supposed to be the top minds on Farzar. 459 00:23:55,334 --> 00:23:56,584 What's the plan? 460 00:23:56,668 --> 00:24:00,001 Renzo, I'll shrink you down with this, shove you up my ass, 461 00:24:00,084 --> 00:24:02,834 then shrink myself down, shove myself up his ass. 462 00:24:02,918 --> 00:24:06,251 We go all around the table until we're one big Russian nesting doll. 463 00:24:06,334 --> 00:24:10,043 -And how does this help get my son back? -Oh, we're still doing that? 464 00:24:15,751 --> 00:24:19,876 Okay, who's the wiseass who decided to put a manual transmission in this thing? 465 00:24:19,959 --> 00:24:22,168 You know I can't drive stick, you fuckers! 466 00:24:25,084 --> 00:24:28,626 Thanks for sticking by me, guys. You're true friends. 467 00:24:28,709 --> 00:24:30,626 Hey, hey, hey, slow down, puffy. 468 00:24:30,709 --> 00:24:33,626 I don't care which side I'm on. Kills are kills. 469 00:24:33,709 --> 00:24:37,626 And, uh, make sure you hydrate, okay? Don't want to cramp up mid-murder. 470 00:24:38,209 --> 00:24:39,793 Look, I fixed your watch. 471 00:24:41,959 --> 00:24:43,793 It's time to end this. 472 00:24:43,876 --> 00:24:46,793 You want me to kill my own dad? 473 00:24:46,876 --> 00:24:48,626 Dramatic! 474 00:24:48,709 --> 00:24:53,126 Didn't you say it was your destiny to rid this planet of evil? 475 00:24:53,209 --> 00:24:55,793 And your dad is… 476 00:24:55,876 --> 00:24:57,168 -Hot? -Evil! 477 00:24:57,251 --> 00:24:59,668 Your dad is evil. 478 00:25:00,376 --> 00:25:04,168 I told Fichael not to go on this mission. He may be dead for all I know. 479 00:25:04,251 --> 00:25:07,834 Why is my son such a goddamn stupid, spoiled little shit? 480 00:25:09,626 --> 00:25:13,834 I understand that you're upset. If Fichael dies, you'll lose the throne. 481 00:25:13,918 --> 00:25:16,543 The throne? I don't want him to die because 482 00:25:17,251 --> 00:25:18,501 he's my son 483 00:25:19,001 --> 00:25:20,459 and I love him. 484 00:25:22,293 --> 00:25:24,126 Wha… What's happening? 485 00:25:24,209 --> 00:25:25,793 Change of plans. 486 00:25:25,876 --> 00:25:28,709 Thank you for telling me the truth about my hot daddy, 487 00:25:28,793 --> 00:25:30,334 but I cannot betray him. 488 00:25:30,418 --> 00:25:35,168 But I think I can convince my father to treat your people fairly. 489 00:25:35,251 --> 00:25:39,751 You're going to convince that evil bastard to be nice? How? 490 00:25:39,834 --> 00:25:41,584 By earning his respect. 491 00:25:41,668 --> 00:25:44,626 But I can't do it alone. I'm going to need your help. 492 00:25:44,709 --> 00:25:46,084 How can I help? 493 00:25:50,168 --> 00:25:55,293 Ha! Poisoned the Gatorade. 2,000 kills. I win! 494 00:25:55,376 --> 00:25:57,001 [laughs] Yeah! 495 00:25:57,084 --> 00:25:58,459 [laughing] 496 00:25:59,126 --> 00:26:01,043 [fanfare playing] 497 00:26:05,001 --> 00:26:06,376 You did it, son. 498 00:26:06,459 --> 00:26:08,834 Deep down, I always knew you could. 499 00:26:08,918 --> 00:26:10,793 -No, you didn't! -No, I didn't. 500 00:26:10,876 --> 00:26:11,876 But I can do this. 501 00:26:12,376 --> 00:26:13,376 [groans] 502 00:26:13,959 --> 00:26:15,001 [clears throat] 503 00:26:16,751 --> 00:26:19,626 Dear, I couldn't find any brownie brittle 504 00:26:19,709 --> 00:26:22,418 and the short rib samples tasted a bit dry. 505 00:26:24,251 --> 00:26:27,168 Wait, did you let my son leave the city? 506 00:26:27,251 --> 00:26:29,876 Renzo, you are done for! 507 00:26:29,959 --> 00:26:32,626 No sunset sloppies for a month! 508 00:26:32,709 --> 00:26:34,001 Oh no. Anything but that. 509 00:26:34,084 --> 00:26:35,918 Dad, we need to talk. 510 00:26:36,001 --> 00:26:39,626 Bazarack told me everything and you're gonna change or-- 511 00:26:39,709 --> 00:26:40,876 Careful, son. 512 00:26:40,959 --> 00:26:42,376 If what he said was true, 513 00:26:42,459 --> 00:26:45,251 do you think I'm the type of man you want to threaten? 514 00:26:45,334 --> 00:26:46,584 Now relax. 515 00:26:47,834 --> 00:26:49,376 Let's just enjoy the game. 516 00:26:49,459 --> 00:26:51,459 [upbeat pop music playing] 517 00:26:55,334 --> 00:26:58,501 -That's too bad about Bazarack. -[sighs] 518 00:26:58,584 --> 00:27:02,918 -Good thing his race can grow new heads. -[small voice] How intimidating am I now? 519 00:27:03,001 --> 00:27:04,876 Scale of one to ten? 520 00:27:04,959 --> 00:27:06,043 Be honest with me. 521 00:27:08,043 --> 00:27:08,876 I did it! 522 00:27:08,959 --> 00:27:11,793 I made it back without losing my last human part. 523 00:27:12,793 --> 00:27:15,876 [screams] 524 00:27:17,334 --> 00:27:19,251 [adventurous music playing]