1 00:00:14,043 --> 00:00:16,959 Fichael, the time is finally here. 2 00:00:17,043 --> 00:00:20,543 It's the day of your royal seating ceremony! 3 00:00:20,626 --> 00:00:22,043 Oh, I'm so pumped. 4 00:00:22,126 --> 00:00:25,126 But what is a royal seating ceremony? 5 00:00:25,209 --> 00:00:27,334 I'm picturing something like this. 6 00:00:28,376 --> 00:00:31,459 How many times we gotta tell you we can't see your goddamn thoughts? 7 00:00:31,543 --> 00:00:35,418 I'm just excited that my brothers and sisters are coming to Farzar 8 00:00:35,501 --> 00:00:37,293 to oversee the event. 9 00:00:37,376 --> 00:00:38,793 Renzo, what are you doing? 10 00:00:38,876 --> 00:00:40,376 Making sure my tits are swole. 11 00:00:40,459 --> 00:00:43,293 I've never met your family. I've got to make sure they like me. 12 00:00:43,376 --> 00:00:45,668 Oh, I love it when you get insecure. 13 00:00:45,751 --> 00:00:49,084 That really butters up Mama's cum-crumpet. 14 00:00:49,168 --> 00:00:52,334 It does have a tender, flaky crust. 15 00:00:52,418 --> 00:00:54,876 [fanfare plays] 16 00:00:54,959 --> 00:00:59,334 Presenting the rulers of the planets of the Zagloot system. 17 00:00:59,418 --> 00:01:03,334 Well at least if your siblings don't like me, I'll charm their spouses. 18 00:01:05,418 --> 00:01:08,543 Actually, in my family, siblings are the spouses. 19 00:01:08,626 --> 00:01:11,709 We have a long, proud tradition of inbreeding. 20 00:01:14,501 --> 00:01:16,501 Holy shit, this family is fuck-- 21 00:01:16,584 --> 00:01:17,918 …ing awesome! 22 00:01:18,001 --> 00:01:20,251 It's like a free trip to the circus. 23 00:01:20,334 --> 00:01:22,084 Hey, somebody dropped this. 24 00:01:22,168 --> 00:01:23,126 Whoo! 25 00:01:23,209 --> 00:01:25,209 That's your Uncle Wig! 26 00:01:25,293 --> 00:01:27,043 Get your head out of his ass. 27 00:01:27,126 --> 00:01:29,043 Blarf. Blarf. Blarf. Blarf, blarf, blarf. 28 00:01:29,126 --> 00:01:32,751 At least he seems cool. Allow me to introduce myself. I'm-- 29 00:01:32,834 --> 00:01:38,418 The lowlife that got our sister to reject centuries of tradition 30 00:01:38,501 --> 00:01:41,418 and tainted our perfect gene pool. 31 00:01:42,293 --> 00:01:44,834 Pardon me, I seem to have gotten my period. 32 00:01:44,918 --> 00:01:47,918 Tainted gene pool? Our son Fichael turned out fine. 33 00:01:48,001 --> 00:01:51,584 Fine? He has the functioning hands of a peasant. 34 00:01:51,668 --> 00:01:54,543 And his ears are on the outside. 35 00:01:54,626 --> 00:01:59,043 And his ears are on the outside! 36 00:01:59,126 --> 00:02:01,459 [laughing] 37 00:02:01,543 --> 00:02:06,084 Flammy, it's a shame that you married this tall, muscle-bound cretin 38 00:02:06,168 --> 00:02:09,126 instead of your handsome ex-fiancé. 39 00:02:09,209 --> 00:02:12,751 Handsome ex-fiancé? What handsome ex-fiancé? 40 00:02:12,834 --> 00:02:15,501 This handsome ex-fiancé. 41 00:02:16,043 --> 00:02:20,709 Puppeteer, make me sashay into the room regally! 42 00:02:23,293 --> 00:02:27,126 Hello, high school sweetheart slash twin sister. 43 00:02:27,209 --> 00:02:30,376 Oh, goddamn! Your ex is your twin brother? 44 00:02:30,459 --> 00:02:33,418 Splammy? I didn't think you'd come. 45 00:02:33,501 --> 00:02:35,126 You made me come. 46 00:02:35,209 --> 00:02:37,793 But enough about our tenth birthday. Mm. 47 00:02:37,876 --> 00:02:39,459 You must be the new guy. 48 00:02:39,543 --> 00:02:42,209 Puppeteer, make me point at that man 49 00:02:42,293 --> 00:02:46,126 with the intimidating intensity of a scorned lover. 50 00:02:46,959 --> 00:02:50,168 Yes. Just like that. 51 00:02:51,418 --> 00:02:53,168 [adventurous music playing] 52 00:03:06,834 --> 00:03:08,834 ♪ Farzar ♪ 53 00:03:11,918 --> 00:03:14,168 [smooth jazz music plays] 54 00:03:16,251 --> 00:03:18,251 Could this be any more romantic? 55 00:03:18,334 --> 00:03:21,001 -[farts] -Oh, Mal, stop farting! 56 00:03:21,543 --> 00:03:23,834 Don't tell me what to do. You know the schedule. 57 00:03:23,918 --> 00:03:26,918 Till 9 p.m., I have the ass, you have the vagina. 58 00:03:27,001 --> 00:03:29,584 So you've got the vagina till 9? 59 00:03:29,668 --> 00:03:32,209 It's 8:59. We can do it four times! 60 00:03:32,293 --> 00:03:35,209 Don't even think about it, mister. We're taking it slow. 61 00:03:35,293 --> 00:03:37,834 Obviously. That's why I only said four times. 62 00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:42,293 I've been cheated on before, Fichael, and I need to make sure that I can trust you. 63 00:03:42,376 --> 00:03:44,584 Val, of course you can trust me, 64 00:03:44,668 --> 00:03:47,584 and I respect the fact that you want to take it slow. 65 00:03:47,668 --> 00:03:51,126 Good, because I don't have sex with just anyone. 66 00:03:51,209 --> 00:03:52,251 [alarm buzzing] 67 00:03:52,334 --> 00:03:53,834 Hey, it's 9 p.m. 68 00:03:53,918 --> 00:03:56,918 You, rando guy, get over here and bang me hard. 69 00:03:59,293 --> 00:04:03,584 Fichael, I've never told you this, but, well, I'm a virgin. 70 00:04:03,668 --> 00:04:06,584 [Mal grunts] Give it to me hard, you bitch! 71 00:04:06,668 --> 00:04:07,501 [grunts] 72 00:04:07,584 --> 00:04:09,626 -Oh, yeah. -Are you sure you're a virgin? 73 00:04:09,709 --> 00:04:12,834 Yes, I've been saving my purity for someone special. 74 00:04:12,918 --> 00:04:15,001 I've never had sex with anyone. 75 00:04:15,084 --> 00:04:17,043 But aren't you having sex right now? 76 00:04:17,126 --> 00:04:20,501 No. Wait! Are you watching my sister have sex? 77 00:04:20,584 --> 00:04:23,293 See, this is why I can't trust you, Fichael. 78 00:04:23,376 --> 00:04:26,793 You're probably going to cheat… on… me… too. 79 00:04:26,876 --> 00:04:29,126 Val, I wouldn't trust this Fichael guy. 80 00:04:29,209 --> 00:04:31,043 Never trust a guy with a weird name. 81 00:04:31,126 --> 00:04:33,251 Take it from me. Bungo Hurpy-Slurpy. 82 00:04:36,584 --> 00:04:38,543 So things aren't going well with Val? 83 00:04:38,626 --> 00:04:42,084 No, but at least Mal and Bungo are getting a long 84 00:04:42,584 --> 00:04:44,918 dildo to go up Bungo's ass. 85 00:04:45,584 --> 00:04:47,793 That was strange place to pause. 86 00:04:47,876 --> 00:04:52,168 Isn't your one-month anniversary tomorrow? You should take Val out for a nice dinner. 87 00:04:52,251 --> 00:04:56,501 That's a great idea. I can take her out after my royal seating ceremony tonight. 88 00:04:56,584 --> 00:04:58,959 Scootie, I could use some dating advice like that. 89 00:04:59,043 --> 00:05:02,168 -I don't have any luck with the ladies. -Oh, why don't you try a dating app? 90 00:05:02,251 --> 00:05:05,376 Well, I did have a blind date last night. I got her in the sack. 91 00:05:05,459 --> 00:05:07,751 -Sounds like it went well. -Tell her that. 92 00:05:07,834 --> 00:05:09,126 [muffled speech] 93 00:05:09,918 --> 00:05:12,293 Do you just hate humans? 94 00:05:12,376 --> 00:05:14,834 Are you hardworking and expendable? 95 00:05:14,918 --> 00:05:17,584 I'm Bazarack, your Emperor Supreme, 96 00:05:17,668 --> 00:05:20,793 and I'm looking for a few good minions. 97 00:05:20,876 --> 00:05:25,376 But I'm a goddamn ass goblin with a horse-faced wife. 98 00:05:25,459 --> 00:05:27,501 Can I work for you? 99 00:05:27,584 --> 00:05:28,834 Sure, ass goblin! 100 00:05:28,918 --> 00:05:33,084 Head on over to bazarackkilldiedeath.com to sign up 101 00:05:33,168 --> 00:05:35,959 and soon, you'll also be saying… 102 00:05:36,043 --> 00:05:37,918 We love it here. 103 00:05:38,001 --> 00:05:39,209 Fuck this place! 104 00:05:39,293 --> 00:05:40,751 -[grunts] -[yelps] 105 00:05:42,293 --> 00:05:46,376 Now maybe I'll get some real minions who are cold-blooded killers, 106 00:05:46,459 --> 00:05:48,543 not like you squishy pillow fuckers. 107 00:05:48,626 --> 00:05:52,293 Hey, why haven't I gotten a single application from my website? 108 00:05:52,376 --> 00:05:57,501 That's because someone else owns bazarackkilldiedeath.com. See? 109 00:05:57,584 --> 00:05:58,543 Arts and crafts? 110 00:05:58,626 --> 00:06:02,584 They're selling arts and crafts on my URL? 111 00:06:02,668 --> 00:06:04,668 This is horrible! 112 00:06:04,751 --> 00:06:08,584 I don't know. They are selling some pretty sweet latch-hook dream catchers, Uncle B. 113 00:06:08,668 --> 00:06:12,626 Quarf, if you weren't my nephew, I would murder your stupid ass. 114 00:06:12,709 --> 00:06:16,418 [groans] I'll never forgive my sister for getting knocked up by an alligator. 115 00:06:16,501 --> 00:06:19,043 Mom said my dad was a Komodo dragon. 116 00:06:19,126 --> 00:06:22,168 Who knows? That squishy slut fucked half the swamp. 117 00:06:22,251 --> 00:06:24,751 You know, I'm getting a little bit pissed here, 118 00:06:24,834 --> 00:06:28,501 because we had a meeting and I clearly said the word of the day is "squishy." 119 00:06:28,584 --> 00:06:29,834 Now, I've said it twice 120 00:06:29,918 --> 00:06:33,376 and I haven't seen no cheering, no screaming, or no confetti. 121 00:06:33,459 --> 00:06:37,043 Anyway, how the hell did this website disaster happen? 122 00:06:37,126 --> 00:06:39,959 I told you to register my domain, Fump! 123 00:06:40,043 --> 00:06:42,001 Uh, you never told me to do that. 124 00:06:42,084 --> 00:06:45,084 You told me to stick my head up my squishy ass. 125 00:06:45,168 --> 00:06:46,001 [alarms blare] 126 00:06:46,084 --> 00:06:49,584 [Pee-Wee Herman] He said the word of the day! Yay! 127 00:06:50,543 --> 00:06:51,959 Oh, fuck all of you. 128 00:06:54,084 --> 00:06:57,793 This whole ball is just for my royal seating ceremony? 129 00:06:57,876 --> 00:07:00,334 Oh, isn't it great, Dad? 130 00:07:00,418 --> 00:07:02,709 Shut up, Fichael. Uncle Wig's telling a joke. 131 00:07:02,793 --> 00:07:04,543 Plerf. Plerf. Plerf, plerf, plerf. 132 00:07:04,626 --> 00:07:05,709 [laughs] 133 00:07:05,793 --> 00:07:07,751 Man, that was racist! 134 00:07:13,584 --> 00:07:16,376 Attention, brothers, sisters, cousins, 135 00:07:16,459 --> 00:07:19,418 brother-cousins and sister-cousins, uncle-daughters, 136 00:07:19,501 --> 00:07:22,459 second-cousin-fathers, and Granny Dickchin. 137 00:07:22,543 --> 00:07:24,334 Please stop calling me that. 138 00:07:24,418 --> 00:07:26,084 Oh, go jack-off your chin. 139 00:07:26,168 --> 00:07:30,834 Anyway, I hope everyone is enjoying their feast of white goop, 140 00:07:30,918 --> 00:07:33,543 the only food we can still digest. 141 00:07:33,626 --> 00:07:36,334 Thank you, Hammy, for providing it for us. 142 00:07:41,209 --> 00:07:42,834 Fuck it. Protein's protein. 143 00:07:43,543 --> 00:07:47,918 We all know the reason we have gathered on our sexy sister's planet. 144 00:07:48,001 --> 00:07:50,793 To honor her son, Fichael. 145 00:07:50,876 --> 00:07:54,751 Even though Flammy fucked a loser and birthed a freak, 146 00:07:54,834 --> 00:07:59,459 Fichael still has the right to engage in our traditional ceremony. 147 00:07:59,543 --> 00:08:03,751 I am so excited for my seating ceremony. What do I get to sit on? 148 00:08:03,834 --> 00:08:06,084 Uh, not seating. 149 00:08:06,168 --> 00:08:07,626 Seeding. 150 00:08:07,709 --> 00:08:11,084 You're going to impregnate all of your cousins 151 00:08:11,168 --> 00:08:13,251 while the whole family watches 152 00:08:13,334 --> 00:08:18,001 and finger-bangs our inverted penises and upside-down vaginas. 153 00:08:18,084 --> 00:08:19,501 Bring out the cousins! 154 00:08:22,501 --> 00:08:25,043 I can't have sex with my freak-show cousins. 155 00:08:25,126 --> 00:08:27,959 I have a freak-show girlfriend. Mom, tell them! 156 00:08:28,043 --> 00:08:30,418 Sorry, son, it's tradition. 157 00:08:30,501 --> 00:08:31,459 Daddy? 158 00:08:32,584 --> 00:08:34,543 That's a good point, Uncle Wig. 159 00:08:34,626 --> 00:08:37,209 We might all be living in a simulation. 160 00:08:38,251 --> 00:08:39,168 [grunts] 161 00:08:39,251 --> 00:08:42,834 Sorry, I think I'm gonna take a rain check on the cousin orgy. 162 00:08:42,918 --> 00:08:44,043 Great ball though! 163 00:08:44,626 --> 00:08:46,209 After him, cousins! 164 00:08:46,709 --> 00:08:50,126 Everyone, let's not let this ruin our ball. 165 00:08:50,209 --> 00:08:51,126 Now we dance! 166 00:08:51,709 --> 00:08:55,334 That goddamn, inbred marionette is trying to Howdy-Doody-dick my damn wife. 167 00:08:55,418 --> 00:08:57,376 If I lose Flammy, I lose my kingdom. 168 00:08:57,459 --> 00:08:59,834 I'm gonna have to teach his little ass a lesson. 169 00:08:59,918 --> 00:09:02,376 -[dance music playing] -Puppeteer, grind up on it. 170 00:09:02,459 --> 00:09:04,418 Make me slap that ass. 171 00:09:07,793 --> 00:09:09,043 How's the online dating going? 172 00:09:09,126 --> 00:09:11,709 I made a match, but it's going horribly. 173 00:09:11,793 --> 00:09:15,168 We did a video chat the other day and she kept baring her teeth at me. 174 00:09:15,251 --> 00:09:17,751 You mean smile? That means it's going well. 175 00:09:17,834 --> 00:09:20,751 Oh, really? Why hasn't she tried to steal my social security number? 176 00:09:20,834 --> 00:09:22,501 Or introduced me to her cult leader? 177 00:09:22,584 --> 00:09:26,251 Or lured me to a hotel room, chained me to a bed, and made me raw dog her husband? 178 00:09:26,334 --> 00:09:28,626 Man, you've had some bad experiences with women. 179 00:09:28,709 --> 00:09:30,709 All this stuff means is that she likes you. 180 00:09:30,793 --> 00:09:32,334 Haven't you had a woman like you before? 181 00:09:32,418 --> 00:09:35,418 -I've never had anyone like me before. -[phone ringing] 182 00:09:35,501 --> 00:09:38,709 Wait a minute, maybe you're right. She's calling me right now. 183 00:09:39,584 --> 00:09:42,293 Hi, Barry. [giggles] I hope this isn't too forward, 184 00:09:42,376 --> 00:09:44,959 but I've been having such a great time chatting with you. 185 00:09:45,043 --> 00:09:46,209 I think we should meet. 186 00:09:46,293 --> 00:09:47,918 How about at my mother's house? 187 00:09:48,001 --> 00:09:50,126 -Maybe in the bathroom? -No! 188 00:09:50,209 --> 00:09:52,293 I'm not from Farzar. Let's meet in the middle. 189 00:09:52,376 --> 00:09:55,584 Sending coordinates now. See you tonight, hot stuff. 190 00:09:55,668 --> 00:09:57,668 Look at that. You got a date tonight. 191 00:09:57,751 --> 00:10:00,418 If this is anything like prom night, I better get some condoms, 192 00:10:00,501 --> 00:10:02,501 because she'll force me to fill them with drugs, 193 00:10:02,584 --> 00:10:04,584 swallow them, and smuggle them into a prison. 194 00:10:04,668 --> 00:10:06,793 Then make me raw dog her husband. 195 00:10:07,709 --> 00:10:09,543 You know, I'm getting a little miffed here, 196 00:10:09,626 --> 00:10:11,793 because the word of the day is "raw dog." 197 00:10:11,876 --> 00:10:16,543 I've said it twice and I haven't seen no cheering, no screaming, or no confetti. 198 00:10:18,293 --> 00:10:20,793 What the fuck are you talking about, Barry? 199 00:10:29,293 --> 00:10:31,751 Why would she want to meet me way out here? 200 00:10:31,834 --> 00:10:36,084 She's making a fool of you, Barry. I'm gonna give her a piece of my mind. 201 00:10:36,168 --> 00:10:37,418 [phone dialing] 202 00:10:39,418 --> 00:10:40,501 Hello? 203 00:10:40,584 --> 00:10:43,543 Dear God. I'm going to need a bigger scrote. 204 00:10:45,584 --> 00:10:50,501 Bazarackkilldiedeath.com is registered to a home on this retirement planet. 205 00:10:50,584 --> 00:10:52,376 Shady Acreon Four. 206 00:10:54,793 --> 00:10:58,834 I'm gonna destroy these blue-haired twats and steal my URL back. 207 00:10:58,918 --> 00:11:00,001 There's the place. 208 00:11:04,918 --> 00:11:09,501 Why did you quip-queefers steal my website, bazarackkilldiedeath.com? 209 00:11:09,584 --> 00:11:11,709 What's Bazarackkilldiedeath? 210 00:11:11,793 --> 00:11:12,876 Our web address 211 00:11:12,959 --> 00:11:17,501 stands for a bazaar of arts and crafts from Kiki, Ildi, and Edith. 212 00:11:18,459 --> 00:11:20,084 That's not how you spell "bazaar." 213 00:11:20,168 --> 00:11:23,709 That's because Kiki registered it and she's the dumb one. 214 00:11:23,793 --> 00:11:25,168 And you're the bitch. 215 00:11:25,251 --> 00:11:27,126 Aw. [chuckles] 216 00:11:27,209 --> 00:11:29,793 What are you laughing at? You're the slut! 217 00:11:29,876 --> 00:11:34,584 That is the classic dynamic. Every woman has to be one of those three. 218 00:11:34,668 --> 00:11:36,584 -Now give me my website. -No. 219 00:11:36,668 --> 00:11:39,584 No?! No?! 220 00:11:42,418 --> 00:11:44,209 Well, we gave it a hell of a try. Let's go. 221 00:11:44,293 --> 00:11:46,626 Wait, won't you stay for cheesecake? 222 00:11:46,709 --> 00:11:47,668 Cheesecake? 223 00:11:48,293 --> 00:11:50,543 Cheesecake?! 224 00:11:53,043 --> 00:11:57,001 And that's why Kiki hid her girdle in the flowerpot. 225 00:11:57,084 --> 00:11:58,418 Oh! [chuckles] 226 00:11:58,501 --> 00:12:00,626 Oh, that is so Kiki! 227 00:12:00,709 --> 00:12:03,793 Edith, why did you miss the shuffleboard game yesterday? 228 00:12:03,876 --> 00:12:07,293 Oh, I was in bed with Arthur Ritis. 229 00:12:07,376 --> 00:12:11,459 Makes sense. You already slept with the other two Ritis brothers. 230 00:12:11,543 --> 00:12:12,793 [laughs] 231 00:12:12,876 --> 00:12:17,209 You guys ever have normal conversations? Or is it all setup, punchline? 232 00:12:17,293 --> 00:12:19,376 Anyone interested in bridge? 233 00:12:19,459 --> 00:12:22,751 You talking about the game or the thing you live under? 234 00:12:22,834 --> 00:12:25,876 Ooh, they're coming too fast! Oh, they're coming too fast! 235 00:12:25,959 --> 00:12:28,584 Ooh. Oh, you girls are on fire. 236 00:12:28,668 --> 00:12:33,751 Ooh, sure feels like it. I get so many hot flashes, I could cook eggs. 237 00:12:33,834 --> 00:12:35,043 Your eggs have been cooked 238 00:12:35,126 --> 00:12:38,209 since that botched back-alley abortion destroyed your uterus. 239 00:12:40,001 --> 00:12:42,376 Am I supposed to laugh? This shit just got dark. 240 00:12:42,459 --> 00:12:47,126 She's just mad because we don't like her fiancé, Harold. 241 00:12:47,209 --> 00:12:49,709 Leave Harold alone! I love him! 242 00:12:50,543 --> 00:12:54,376 You know, if I got rid of this Harold character for you, 243 00:12:54,459 --> 00:12:58,043 would you be willing to give me bazarackkilldiedeath.com? 244 00:12:58,126 --> 00:12:59,834 You've got yourself a deal. 245 00:12:59,918 --> 00:13:01,126 Harold's bad news. 246 00:13:01,209 --> 00:13:03,001 I can feel it in my bones. 247 00:13:03,084 --> 00:13:06,168 No, Edith, that's just your osteoporosis. 248 00:13:06,251 --> 00:13:10,251 And we're right back to the zingers like the abortion stuff never happened. 249 00:13:12,751 --> 00:13:14,251 Obviously, I wasn't up-front 250 00:13:14,334 --> 00:13:17,793 about the whole being an immortal galactic being thing. 251 00:13:17,876 --> 00:13:19,709 Now that you've seen my true form, 252 00:13:19,793 --> 00:13:22,834 I'm sure you'll run the other direction like every other guy does. 253 00:13:22,918 --> 00:13:23,959 Oh my God. 254 00:13:24,043 --> 00:13:25,709 Women do that to me too. 255 00:13:25,793 --> 00:13:28,876 The second they see me strip nude and put a gun in my mouth, they're like, 256 00:13:28,959 --> 00:13:31,459 "Oh, how did you get into my apartment?" 257 00:13:31,543 --> 00:13:32,668 People are so rude. 258 00:13:32,751 --> 00:13:35,251 I guess we're just a couple of lonely weirdos, huh? 259 00:13:35,334 --> 00:13:37,251 I don't feel so lonely anymore. 260 00:13:39,459 --> 00:13:42,418 ♪ Love is the moon ♪ 261 00:13:42,501 --> 00:13:45,668 ♪ And love is the sun ♪ 262 00:13:46,251 --> 00:13:50,626 ♪ It's the heat of our bodies as one ♪ 263 00:13:52,001 --> 00:13:54,626 ♪ Together, you and me ♪ 264 00:13:54,709 --> 00:13:57,418 ♪ We fit so perfectly ♪ 265 00:13:57,501 --> 00:13:59,543 ♪ It's a dream… ♪ 266 00:13:59,626 --> 00:14:01,793 I've got a mission for you, Barry. 267 00:14:04,584 --> 00:14:07,251 ♪ Love is a ride ♪ 268 00:14:07,751 --> 00:14:10,501 ♪ A mystery flight ♪ 269 00:14:11,168 --> 00:14:13,834 ♪ It's the magic that pushes through… ♪ 270 00:14:15,834 --> 00:14:18,834 ♪ And it's clear to me that love… ♪ 271 00:14:18,918 --> 00:14:21,876 Say, I've got a mission for you, Gal. 272 00:14:21,959 --> 00:14:24,043 Ah! Abort mission! Abort mission! 273 00:14:26,709 --> 00:14:27,834 ♪ Ooh… ♪ 274 00:14:27,918 --> 00:14:31,334 Well, Gal, here's to our first romantic dinner together. 275 00:14:31,418 --> 00:14:34,584 Oh, that's sweet, Barry, but I don't eat human food. 276 00:14:34,668 --> 00:14:38,209 In fact, I only eat one thing. [chuckles] 277 00:14:45,334 --> 00:14:47,584 What? Do I have something in my teeth? 278 00:14:48,876 --> 00:14:50,793 So that explains your full name, 279 00:14:50,876 --> 00:14:52,668 Galaxia, Eater of Worlds. 280 00:14:52,751 --> 00:14:54,543 I just thought you were Greek. 281 00:14:57,543 --> 00:15:02,376 Oh, I can't believe Fichael is late for our one-month anniversary dinner. 282 00:15:02,459 --> 00:15:04,293 Uh, who gives a fuck? 283 00:15:04,376 --> 00:15:05,959 -I'm gonna call him. -[phone dialing] 284 00:15:06,043 --> 00:15:08,126 Fichael? Fichael, where are you? 285 00:15:08,209 --> 00:15:11,126 You're missing our one-month anniversary dinner. 286 00:15:11,209 --> 00:15:13,334 Uh, sorry, I'm sick. 287 00:15:13,418 --> 00:15:15,334 Oh! How'd you get sick? 288 00:15:15,418 --> 00:15:17,126 Get off my back, cunt face! 289 00:15:17,209 --> 00:15:19,126 Ugh, get off! Come on! 290 00:15:19,209 --> 00:15:21,668 What?! Uh, he hung up. 291 00:15:21,751 --> 00:15:25,918 God, I can't believe you're thinking about giving up your virginity to that guy. 292 00:15:26,001 --> 00:15:27,626 I'd be more picky if I were you. 293 00:15:27,709 --> 00:15:32,293 Hey, Gramps. What are you doing at 9:01? You wanna get up in this? 294 00:15:36,459 --> 00:15:38,876 Thank God. I'm safe in here. 295 00:15:40,626 --> 00:15:41,668 Spider cousin! 296 00:15:41,751 --> 00:15:43,626 [action music plays] 297 00:15:49,168 --> 00:15:50,668 Ugh! Fichael?! 298 00:15:50,751 --> 00:15:53,084 Val, it's not as bad as it looks. 299 00:15:53,168 --> 00:15:56,668 These girls who are about to bang me, they're my cousins. 300 00:16:04,418 --> 00:16:05,668 I didn't order this. 301 00:16:05,751 --> 00:16:09,501 It's from me. I've heard a lot about you, Harold. 302 00:16:09,584 --> 00:16:10,751 I'm Barbarack. 303 00:16:10,834 --> 00:16:13,793 I like tennis, I make a mean squash casserole, 304 00:16:13,876 --> 00:16:16,084 and my bush looks like a burned-down house. 305 00:16:16,168 --> 00:16:17,168 Wanna see? 306 00:16:17,251 --> 00:16:19,376 Ah. Barbarack, is it? 307 00:16:19,459 --> 00:16:22,793 The girls at Bible study call me Pussy Quicksilver. 308 00:16:25,418 --> 00:16:26,709 You like to golf? 309 00:16:26,793 --> 00:16:29,418 I got two or three holes you can drop your balls in. 310 00:16:29,501 --> 00:16:33,043 One of them feels like a sand trap, but I'm not telling you which one. 311 00:16:33,126 --> 00:16:37,084 Look, Barbarack, you're a beautiful woman, and I appreciate the offer, 312 00:16:37,168 --> 00:16:39,626 but my heart belongs to another. 313 00:16:40,543 --> 00:16:44,293 Ugh. I can't believe he didn't want to see my arson bush. 314 00:16:44,376 --> 00:16:46,876 I wants to see your arson bush! 315 00:16:46,959 --> 00:16:50,626 [Pee-Wee Herman] He said the word of the day! Yay! 316 00:16:50,709 --> 00:16:52,918 I just said it! 317 00:17:00,834 --> 00:17:02,209 Wake up, you little twerp. 318 00:17:02,918 --> 00:17:04,501 Here's what's about to happen. 319 00:17:04,584 --> 00:17:07,126 I'm gonna give you the beatdown of your life. 320 00:17:07,209 --> 00:17:10,501 Then you're going to leave this planet forever. 321 00:17:10,584 --> 00:17:12,418 Oh, there's going to be a beatdown, 322 00:17:12,501 --> 00:17:14,876 but it's not going to be me. 323 00:17:14,959 --> 00:17:16,668 Puppeteer! 324 00:17:16,751 --> 00:17:18,376 -[action music plays] -[grunts] 325 00:17:20,168 --> 00:17:23,001 Show no mercy, puppeteer! 326 00:17:25,251 --> 00:17:26,501 [grunts] 327 00:17:26,584 --> 00:17:28,918 What the fuck are you? Sesame Street Fighter? 328 00:17:29,001 --> 00:17:31,876 Puppeteer! Liu Kang bicycle kick. 329 00:17:31,959 --> 00:17:33,959 -Ah! -[grunting] 330 00:17:41,418 --> 00:17:44,668 That's gotta be the best goddamn puppeteer in the universe. 331 00:17:44,751 --> 00:17:47,001 Puppeteer, finish him! 332 00:17:48,543 --> 00:17:49,376 [grunts] 333 00:17:50,209 --> 00:17:51,543 -Ha ha! -[grunts] 334 00:17:52,626 --> 00:17:54,334 Help! I've been attacked. 335 00:17:54,418 --> 00:17:58,084 This man assaulted a member of the royal family, 336 00:17:58,168 --> 00:18:00,584 an act punishable by death! 337 00:18:00,668 --> 00:18:02,959 Flammy, I didn't get a single punch in, 338 00:18:03,043 --> 00:18:05,876 which makes sense because I came here to tuck him in. 339 00:18:05,959 --> 00:18:07,584 Those are the rules. 340 00:18:07,668 --> 00:18:09,001 I have no choice. 341 00:18:09,084 --> 00:18:11,043 An execution is in order. 342 00:18:11,126 --> 00:18:13,001 Et tu, Uncle Wig? 343 00:18:13,084 --> 00:18:14,209 Plarf. 344 00:18:14,293 --> 00:18:17,459 Puppeteer, make me spit on him. 345 00:18:17,543 --> 00:18:19,043 [puppeteer] Bee-oop! 346 00:18:19,126 --> 00:18:20,043 Splat. 347 00:18:20,126 --> 00:18:21,959 Where do you wanna go to dinner tonight, babe? 348 00:18:22,043 --> 00:18:25,501 I'm kind of craving an ice planet, or maybe something with rings. 349 00:18:25,584 --> 00:18:26,584 Yes, about that. 350 00:18:26,668 --> 00:18:29,334 I was wondering if it, uh, would be a good idea 351 00:18:29,418 --> 00:18:32,251 if you maybe cut down on the planet eating. 352 00:18:32,334 --> 00:18:34,959 So what… what is that supposed to mean? You think I'm fat? 353 00:18:35,043 --> 00:18:36,543 No! No, no, no, no! [chuckles] 354 00:18:36,626 --> 00:18:39,626 It's more about the killing- billions-of-innocent-people thing. 355 00:18:39,709 --> 00:18:42,043 Why not eat uninhabited planets? 356 00:18:42,126 --> 00:18:45,376 Oh, here we go! All vegans want to talk about is being vegan. 357 00:18:45,459 --> 00:18:48,418 Look, this time with you has made me so happy that it's been days 358 00:18:48,501 --> 00:18:50,959 since the voice in my head told me to tongue-fuck a shotgun. 359 00:18:51,043 --> 00:18:55,209 I'm just having a teensy problem with the planetary genocide. 360 00:18:55,293 --> 00:18:56,251 Look at it like this. 361 00:18:56,334 --> 00:18:59,918 Every time you wash your hands, you're killing billions of inferior organisms. 362 00:19:00,001 --> 00:19:03,126 I'm doing the exact same thing. Three meals a day. 363 00:19:03,209 --> 00:19:05,001 Mm. These are good points. 364 00:19:05,084 --> 00:19:08,334 Blarpon 13! This planet will be perfect for dinner. 365 00:19:08,418 --> 00:19:10,459 Would you be a dear and go glaze the innocent people 366 00:19:10,543 --> 00:19:11,959 in teriyaki for me? Thanks. 367 00:19:12,043 --> 00:19:15,626 [voice in Barry's head] Now Barry had gotten himself into quite a pickle. 368 00:19:15,709 --> 00:19:19,334 Was he going to listen to his girlfriend or his conscience? 369 00:19:19,418 --> 00:19:23,376 Seems like the easiest thing to do would be to tongue-fuck a shotgun. 370 00:19:23,459 --> 00:19:25,084 Damn it. He's back. 371 00:19:30,376 --> 00:19:31,709 I need to talk to Val. 372 00:19:31,793 --> 00:19:33,251 She's not here right now. 373 00:19:33,334 --> 00:19:35,834 And even if she was, she wouldn't want to talk to you. 374 00:19:35,918 --> 00:19:37,959 What kind of sex addict perv are you? 375 00:19:38,043 --> 00:19:40,043 [chuckles] Is it 9:00 yet? 376 00:19:40,126 --> 00:19:41,209 Almost! 377 00:19:41,293 --> 00:19:45,043 Well if Val were here, I'd tell her I did not cheat on her. 378 00:19:45,126 --> 00:19:49,043 My family is trying to force me to impregnate my cousins. 379 00:19:49,126 --> 00:19:49,959 Whoo! 380 00:19:50,043 --> 00:19:51,293 Unfortunately, 381 00:19:51,376 --> 00:19:55,001 I don't think my cousins will ever stop until they get what they want from me, 382 00:19:55,084 --> 00:19:56,751 but I don't want to cheat on Val, 383 00:19:56,834 --> 00:19:59,459 which is why I spent the last 20 minutes making this. 384 00:19:59,543 --> 00:20:02,043 -What's that? -A gallon jug full of my jizz. 385 00:20:02,126 --> 00:20:03,043 Whoo! 386 00:20:03,126 --> 00:20:05,293 Okay, you mind putting a lid on that? 387 00:20:05,376 --> 00:20:08,959 I'm going to give this to my cousins so they'll stop trying to bang me. 388 00:20:09,043 --> 00:20:11,668 It was the most painful 20 minutes of my life, 389 00:20:11,751 --> 00:20:15,584 but I made this gallon of gunk because I love Val. 390 00:20:15,668 --> 00:20:18,418 Good God. That has to be the-- 391 00:20:18,501 --> 00:20:21,793 Sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. 392 00:20:21,876 --> 00:20:25,251 Oh my God, have you been here the whole time? 393 00:20:26,543 --> 00:20:29,543 Fichael, I'm ready. To do it. 394 00:20:29,626 --> 00:20:33,668 Now? I'm kind of raw down there. Plus the room is kind of full. 395 00:20:33,751 --> 00:20:36,959 This, right here, this is our moment. 396 00:20:37,668 --> 00:20:39,251 [moaning] 397 00:20:39,334 --> 00:20:41,168 -Ow. -[alarm buzzes] 398 00:20:42,543 --> 00:20:46,168 Oh my God, Fichael, it's after nine o'clock! 399 00:20:46,251 --> 00:20:49,001 You are cheating on me with my sister! 400 00:20:49,084 --> 00:20:50,959 -[all gasp] -You disgust me. 401 00:20:51,043 --> 00:20:52,209 Where's your conscience? 402 00:20:52,293 --> 00:20:54,084 Uh… 403 00:20:54,168 --> 00:20:55,126 Whoo! 404 00:20:59,376 --> 00:21:01,959 I'm sorry it came to this, dear. 405 00:21:02,043 --> 00:21:04,459 I told you your family wouldn't fucking like me. 406 00:21:04,543 --> 00:21:08,209 Welcome to the execution ball. 407 00:21:08,293 --> 00:21:09,168 Puppeteer! 408 00:21:13,126 --> 00:21:15,501 Didn't you forget something? 409 00:21:15,584 --> 00:21:16,418 Silly me. 410 00:21:16,501 --> 00:21:22,376 It is tradition that we have ceremonial sustenance before any execution. 411 00:21:22,459 --> 00:21:23,876 Hoist her up! 412 00:21:34,459 --> 00:21:35,376 [squeals] 413 00:21:36,418 --> 00:21:37,876 What happened to Hammy? 414 00:21:37,959 --> 00:21:40,959 Nobody fucks with my family! 415 00:21:41,043 --> 00:21:42,959 [laughing] 416 00:21:51,293 --> 00:21:52,501 Oh, fuck. 417 00:21:57,543 --> 00:21:58,376 Ah! 418 00:22:00,459 --> 00:22:03,459 I will use your bones as dinner utensils 419 00:22:03,543 --> 00:22:06,709 and your skin as rugs in my parlor. 420 00:22:06,793 --> 00:22:08,418 Holy shit, woman. 421 00:22:08,501 --> 00:22:11,959 That was the most fucked-up, ruthless thing I have ever seen, 422 00:22:12,043 --> 00:22:14,876 and I have never been more attracted to you. 423 00:22:14,959 --> 00:22:18,251 I am about to show you a night of passion you won't believe. 424 00:22:18,334 --> 00:22:19,376 Puppeteer! 425 00:22:19,459 --> 00:22:21,709 [Fammy moaning] 426 00:22:21,793 --> 00:22:24,084 Yes! Oh, yes in there! In there! In there! 427 00:22:24,168 --> 00:22:26,126 Puppeteer, let's wrap this up. 428 00:22:28,084 --> 00:22:29,418 [puppeteer] Bee-oop. 429 00:22:29,501 --> 00:22:30,334 Splat. 430 00:22:33,126 --> 00:22:36,709 Kiki, I've got some bad news about Harold. 431 00:22:36,793 --> 00:22:40,334 It turns out your friends were right all along. 432 00:22:40,418 --> 00:22:42,126 He is a bad guy. 433 00:22:47,376 --> 00:22:49,709 Why'd you put Harold's head on both our bodies? 434 00:22:49,793 --> 00:22:52,293 You told me to, and said it would be hilarious. 435 00:22:52,376 --> 00:22:53,959 Don't listen to me when I'm drunk. 436 00:22:54,043 --> 00:22:58,334 Oh my God, Harold has a twin brother that he's sleeping with. 437 00:22:58,418 --> 00:22:59,418 It's over! 438 00:22:59,501 --> 00:23:02,334 [sobs] 439 00:23:02,418 --> 00:23:04,251 Boy, she really is dumb. 440 00:23:04,334 --> 00:23:08,418 Great job, Bazarack. We'll transfer the domain over to you now. 441 00:23:08,501 --> 00:23:10,584 [sobbing] 442 00:23:10,668 --> 00:23:11,876 I can't do this. 443 00:23:11,959 --> 00:23:15,626 Kiki, I won't ruin your life for a web address. 444 00:23:15,709 --> 00:23:17,251 I faked the video. 445 00:23:17,334 --> 00:23:20,751 I tried to get Harold to betray you, but he wouldn't. 446 00:23:20,834 --> 00:23:26,251 He is a great guy and you should marry him. 447 00:23:26,334 --> 00:23:29,334 I now pronounce you man and wife. 448 00:23:30,543 --> 00:23:35,334 Oh, we're sorry for not trusting Harold. We were just afraid that you'd get hurt. 449 00:23:35,418 --> 00:23:40,043 But if Bazarack is vouching for Harold, he's obviously a great guy. 450 00:23:40,126 --> 00:23:41,459 Oh, come here, you! 451 00:23:41,543 --> 00:23:42,584 [grunts] 452 00:23:42,668 --> 00:23:43,793 Girls, I gotta go. 453 00:23:43,876 --> 00:23:47,209 But I'm glad some stories do have happy endings. 454 00:23:50,293 --> 00:23:52,043 Oops. Forgot my keys. 455 00:23:52,709 --> 00:23:53,543 Ah! 456 00:23:54,543 --> 00:23:58,459 Harold! What the hell did you do, you fucking psycho? You killed 'em! 457 00:23:58,543 --> 00:24:00,751 Oh, yeah, I'm a serial killer. 458 00:24:00,834 --> 00:24:01,793 [woman] What the hell? 459 00:24:02,459 --> 00:24:05,084 Yeah, like I give a damn, I'll be in my room. 460 00:24:06,793 --> 00:24:10,793 Wow, Edith said you were bad news. I guess she was right. 461 00:24:10,876 --> 00:24:16,084 But now I think about it, this actually solves the whole website problem for me. 462 00:24:16,168 --> 00:24:19,376 Everyone, meet my new minion, 463 00:24:19,459 --> 00:24:20,626 Harold! 464 00:24:20,709 --> 00:24:22,709 Master, are you sure-- 465 00:24:22,793 --> 00:24:24,918 Just hide the knives. It'll be fine. 466 00:24:25,001 --> 00:24:26,834 Hi, everyone. I'm Harold. 467 00:24:26,918 --> 00:24:30,376 [Pee-Wee Herman] He said the name of the day! Ah! 468 00:24:30,459 --> 00:24:32,876 Am I fucking invisible?! 469 00:24:36,293 --> 00:24:41,084 So you're a planet of adorable cancer survivors in wheelchairs. 470 00:24:41,168 --> 00:24:42,501 We're also orphans. 471 00:24:42,584 --> 00:24:44,501 And we have so much to live for. 472 00:24:46,876 --> 00:24:49,584 I'm sorry, kid. I can't raw dog another husband. 473 00:24:49,668 --> 00:24:51,334 Just, yes, lift up the arm. 474 00:24:52,834 --> 00:24:55,626 Hey, lover, how did it go with the mankind marinade? 475 00:24:55,709 --> 00:24:59,418 Look, the planet is full of a lot of really nice children. I-- 476 00:24:59,501 --> 00:25:01,626 Aw, kids are so sweet. 477 00:25:01,709 --> 00:25:05,001 And tender. I'm feeling like having star-becue. 478 00:25:07,668 --> 00:25:09,751 [children screaming] 479 00:25:11,459 --> 00:25:12,793 Barry, what are you doing? 480 00:25:12,876 --> 00:25:15,293 I love you, but I can't let you do this. 481 00:25:15,376 --> 00:25:17,751 Barry! No! 482 00:25:19,126 --> 00:25:21,543 If you had this power, why didn't you do it sooner? 483 00:25:21,626 --> 00:25:24,043 I thought if you were small enough to date other guys, 484 00:25:24,126 --> 00:25:26,209 you wouldn't give me the time of day anymore. 485 00:25:26,293 --> 00:25:27,501 Oh, Barry, 486 00:25:27,584 --> 00:25:28,709 you were totally right. 487 00:25:28,793 --> 00:25:29,751 Goodbye forever! 488 00:25:30,709 --> 00:25:32,001 Wait, one last thing. 489 00:25:32,084 --> 00:25:33,168 Can I borrow this? 490 00:25:40,043 --> 00:25:41,668 Good call on the teriyaki. 491 00:25:43,334 --> 00:25:46,251 ♪ Love is the moon ♪ 492 00:25:46,334 --> 00:25:49,793 ♪ And love is the sun ♪ 493 00:25:49,876 --> 00:25:54,751 ♪ It's the heat of our bodies as one ♪ 494 00:25:55,834 --> 00:25:58,751 ♪ Together, you and me ♪ 495 00:25:58,834 --> 00:26:01,209 ♪ We fit so perfectly ♪ 496 00:26:01,293 --> 00:26:07,751 ♪ It's a dream to me ♪ 497 00:26:08,334 --> 00:26:10,751 ♪ Love is a ride ♪ 498 00:26:11,334 --> 00:26:14,751 ♪ A mystery flight ♪ 499 00:26:14,834 --> 00:26:19,751 ♪ It's the magic that pushes through ♪ 500 00:26:19,834 --> 00:26:25,751 ♪ And it's clear to me that love is you ♪