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‎NETFLIX 影集

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‎費可，這一天終於到了

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‎你的皇家授旗典禮

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‎我都熱血沸騰了

5
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‎但皇家授旗典禮是什麼？

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‎我想像的是這樣子

7
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‎是要我們要跟你說幾次？
‎我們看不到你的死想法！

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‎我很興奮我的兄弟姐妹都要來法札星

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‎視察這項活動

10
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‎藍佐，你在幹嘛？

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‎確保我的乳頭也有鍛鍊到

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‎我沒見過妳的家人
‎得要確保他們喜歡我

13
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‎我真愛你沒有安全感的樣子

14
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‎讓媽媽那兒都濕潤了起來呢

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‎那兒確實需要潤滑一下

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‎薩格魯星系的行星統治者駕到

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‎如果妳的手足不喜歡我
‎起碼我可以討好他們的配偶

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‎其實在我家，手足就是配偶

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‎我們長久以來
‎擁有近親繁殖的驕傲傳統

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‎要死了，這個家族真是…

21
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‎厲害得不得了！

22
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‎像是免費參觀馬戲團

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‎嘿，有人掉了這個

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‎那是你的假髮舅

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‎你的頭不要頂著他的屁股

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‎巴拉巴拉

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‎起碼他看起來很上道
‎容我介紹自己，我…

28
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‎是那個下三濫
‎害我們的親姐妹揚棄長久傳統

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‎玷污了我們完美的基因庫

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‎不好意思，我的月經好像來了

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‎玷污基因庫？
‎我們的兒子費可長得很好啊

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‎很好？他的雙手跟鄉下人一樣很管用

33
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‎而且他的耳朵長在外面

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‎而且他的耳朵長在外面！

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‎芙萊咪，可惜妳嫁給了這個
‎四肢發達的呆哥

36
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‎而不是妳帥氣的前未婚夫

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‎帥氣的前未婚夫？
‎什麼帥氣的前未婚夫？

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‎這個帥氣的前未婚夫

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‎木偶師，讓我像帝王一般進場

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‎哈囉，高中女友兼雙胞胎妹妹

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‎要死了，妳的前任跟妳是雙胞胎？

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‎史布拉米？沒想到你會出來

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‎還不都是妳害我射出來

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‎但先別聊我們的十歲生日

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‎想必你就是那個新的男人

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‎木偶師，讓我指著那個男的

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‎帶有情敵鄙夷的強烈恫嚇

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‎對，就像這樣

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‎還可以再更浪漫嗎？

50
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‎梅兒，別放屁了！

51
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‎少指揮我，妳知道排程

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‎晚上9點之前，屁股歸我，陰道歸妳

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‎所以9點前陰道歸妳？

54
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‎現在是8點59分，可以做四次

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‎想得美，先生，我們要慢慢來

56
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‎顯然是這樣，所以我才說四次

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‎我被背叛過，費可
‎我需要確保你靠得住

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‎薇兒，我當然靠得住

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‎我也尊重妳想要慢慢來

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‎很好，因為我不隨便跟人做愛

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‎嘿，晚上9點了

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‎你，路人甲，過來用力幹我

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‎費可，我沒跟你說過，但我是處女

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‎用力幹我，賤人！

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‎-爽喔
‎-妳確定妳是處女嗎？

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‎對，我要把童貞留給特別的人

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‎我沒跟人做過愛

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‎但妳現在不就是在做愛嗎？

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‎不是，等等！你在看我姐妹做愛嗎？

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‎看吧，所以我信不過你，費可

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‎你八成也會…背…叛…我

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‎薇兒，我信不過這個費可

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‎千萬別相信名字很怪的人

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‎我是邦果疱疹絲思樂冰，相信我

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‎（SHAT小隊）

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‎所以你和薇兒不順利啊？

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‎沒錯，但起碼梅兒和邦果合拍…

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‎假屌插進了邦果的屁眼

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‎你在那裡暫停很怪

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‎明天不就是你們的滿月紀念日嗎？
‎你應該帶薇兒去吃浪漫晚餐

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‎好主意！今晚的皇家授旗典禮過後
‎我就可以帶她出去

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‎史庫弟，我需要這樣的約會建議

83
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‎-我向來沒有女性緣
‎-何不試試約會應用程式？

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‎我昨晚是有去相親
‎她也成了我的囊中物

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‎-聽起來很順利啊
‎-你跟她說說

86
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‎你是不是痛恨人類？

87
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‎你是不是努力工作卻不被重用？

88
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‎我是巴薩拉克，你們的極上帝王

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‎我正在尋找幾個好爪牙

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00:05:20,876 --> 00:05:25,376
‎但我只是娶了馬臉太太的臭地精

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‎我能幫你做事嗎？

92
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‎當然，臭地精！

93
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‎快上巴薩拉克殺死亡達康報名

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‎你們也很快就會說…

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‎我們愛死這兒了…

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‎這地方去死啦！

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‎（今天就報名！）

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‎這下子或許我能請到
‎冷血殺手等級真正的爪牙

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‎不像你們這些軟爛沒用的三腳貓

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‎嘿，怎麼網站上完全沒人報名？

101
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‎那是因為巴薩拉克殺死亡達康網址
‎被人註冊走了，你看

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‎美術工藝？

103
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‎我的網址被用來賣美術工藝？

104
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‎真是太糟糕了！

105
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‎不知道耶，巴舅
‎上頭有賣一些很讚的針織捕夢網

106
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‎夸夫，你要不是我外甥
‎我一定宰了你這個蠢東西

107
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‎我永遠不會原諒我妹被鱷魚搞大肚子

108
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‎媽說我爸是科摩多巨蜥

109
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‎誰知道？沼澤一半的生物
‎都被那個軟爛的蕩婦給搞上了

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‎其實我有點不爽

111
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‎因為我們開過會
‎我顯然說今天的每日一詞是“軟爛”

112
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‎這下子我說了兩次

113
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‎卻沒看到有人歡呼尖叫
‎也沒有五彩碎紙

114
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‎說來說去
‎這個網址災難是怎麼發生的？

115
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‎放普，我都要你幫我登記網域了

116
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‎你從來沒有叫我做這個

117
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‎你是叫我把頭插進我軟爛的屁眼

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‎（軟爛）

119
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‎他說出了每日一詞，好耶

120
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‎（軟爛）

121
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‎你們去死一死啦

122
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‎這整個舞會
‎全是為了我的皇家授旗典禮嗎？

123
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‎是不是很棒，爸？

124
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‎閉嘴，費可，假髮舅正在說笑話

125
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‎巴拉巴拉

126
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‎天啊，那樣很種族歧視

127
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‎注意，各位親兄弟姐妹、表兄弟姐妹

128
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‎兒子兼表弟
‎女兒兼表妹、舅媽兼老婆

129
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‎表父親和屌下巴奶奶

130
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‎請不要那樣叫我

131
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‎妳去用下巴打手槍啦

132
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‎說來說去
‎我希望大家都很享受白糊饗宴

133
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‎我們只剩下這個可以消化了

134
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‎哈咪，謝謝妳提供給我們

135
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‎管他的，蛋白質就是蛋白質

136
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‎大家都知道我們來到性感姐妹的星球

137
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‎是為了榮耀她的兒子費可

138
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‎儘管芙萊咪上了廢渣，生下怪物

139
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‎費可依然有權參與我們的傳統典禮

140
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‎我的授旗典禮讓我好興奮
‎旗子在哪裡？

141
00:08:04,668 --> 00:08:06,084
‎不是授旗

142
00:08:06,168 --> 00:08:07,626
‎是授“精”

143
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‎你要讓你所有的表姐妹懷孕

144
00:08:11,168 --> 00:08:13,251
‎整個家族欣賞之餘

145
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‎還要用手指把玩前後反置的陰莖
‎和上下顛倒的陰道

146
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‎把表姐妹帶出來！

147
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‎我不能和我的怪胎秀表姐妹做愛

148
00:08:25,126 --> 00:08:27,959
‎我自己就有怪胎秀女友了
‎媽，快跟他們說

149
00:08:28,043 --> 00:08:30,418
‎抱歉，兒子，這是傳統

150
00:08:30,501 --> 00:08:31,459
‎爹地？

151
00:08:32,584 --> 00:08:34,543
‎有道理，假髮舅

152
00:08:34,626 --> 00:08:37,209
‎我們或許全都活在模擬裡頭

153
00:08:39,251 --> 00:08:42,834
‎抱歉，這次的表親大雜交
‎我想得要改天了

154
00:08:42,918 --> 00:08:44,043
‎但舞會本身很讚！

155
00:08:44,126 --> 00:08:46,209
‎追上去，眾親戚

156
00:08:46,709 --> 00:08:50,126
‎大家別讓這件事壞了舞會的興致

157
00:08:50,209 --> 00:08:51,126
‎現在來跳舞吧

158
00:08:51,709 --> 00:08:55,334
‎那個近親交配的牽線木偶
‎想要跟我太太亂倫

159
00:08:55,418 --> 00:08:57,376
‎如果失去芙萊咪，我也就會失去王國

160
00:08:57,459 --> 00:08:59,834
‎我得要給那個小屁蛋一點顏色瞧瞧

161
00:08:59,918 --> 00:09:02,376
‎木偶師，用力催下去

162
00:09:02,459 --> 00:09:04,418
‎讓我啪她的屁

163
00:09:05,501 --> 00:09:07,084
‎（SHAT小隊）

164
00:09:07,793 --> 00:09:09,043
‎網路約會怎麼樣？

165
00:09:09,126 --> 00:09:11,709
‎我有配到對，但很糟糕

166
00:09:11,793 --> 00:09:15,168
‎我們前幾天開視訊聊天
‎她一直對我露牙齒

167
00:09:15,251 --> 00:09:17,751
‎你是說微笑嗎？這表示很順利

168
00:09:17,834 --> 00:09:20,751
‎真的？那她怎麼還沒想要
‎偷我的社會保險證號碼？

169
00:09:20,834 --> 00:09:22,501
‎或是把我介紹給她的邪教領袖？

170
00:09:22,584 --> 00:09:26,251
‎或是把我騙進飯店房間
‎把我鍊在床上，強迫我中出她先生？

171
00:09:26,334 --> 00:09:28,626
‎天啊，你跟女性的經驗還真不愉快

172
00:09:28,709 --> 00:09:32,334
‎這一切都是表示她喜歡你
‎你沒遇過有女性喜歡你嗎？

173
00:09:32,418 --> 00:09:34,751
‎我沒遇過任何人喜歡我

174
00:09:35,501 --> 00:09:38,709
‎慢著，或許你說得對，她打給我了

175
00:09:40,084 --> 00:09:42,293
‎嗨，貝利，我希望這樣不會太主動

176
00:09:42,376 --> 00:09:44,959
‎但我跟你聊天聊得好愉快

177
00:09:45,043 --> 00:09:46,209
‎我認為我們應該見面

178
00:09:46,293 --> 00:09:47,918
‎要不要約在我媽家？

179
00:09:48,001 --> 00:09:50,126
‎-或許約浴室？
‎-不對啦！

180
00:09:50,209 --> 00:09:52,293
‎我不是法札星人，我們約中間吧

181
00:09:52,376 --> 00:09:55,584
‎我把座標傳給你，今晚見，大帥哥

182
00:09:55,668 --> 00:09:57,668
‎你看看，你今晚有約會了

183
00:09:57,751 --> 00:10:00,418
‎如果這和畢業舞會之夜一樣
‎我最好去準備保險套

184
00:10:00,501 --> 00:10:04,584
‎因為她會逼我用毒品裝滿保險套
‎吞下去之後走私進監獄

185
00:10:04,668 --> 00:10:06,793
‎然後逼我中出她先生

186
00:10:07,709 --> 00:10:09,543
‎其實我有點不開心

187
00:10:09,626 --> 00:10:11,793
‎因為每日一詞是“中出”

188
00:10:11,876 --> 00:10:12,918
‎我說了兩次

189
00:10:13,001 --> 00:10:16,543
‎卻沒看到有人歡呼尖叫
‎也沒有五彩碎紙

190
00:10:18,293 --> 00:10:20,793
‎你在說什麼鬼東西，貝利？

191
00:10:29,293 --> 00:10:31,751
‎她幹嘛跟我約在大老遠這兒？

192
00:10:31,834 --> 00:10:36,084
‎她在耍你，貝利，我要好好說一說她

193
00:10:39,418 --> 00:10:40,501
‎喂？

194
00:10:40,584 --> 00:10:43,543
‎天啊，我會需要更大的老二

195
00:10:45,584 --> 00:10:50,501
‎巴薩拉克殺死亡達康網址
‎被登記在這個退休星球的一處人家

196
00:10:50,584 --> 00:10:52,376
‎可疑艾克朗四號星

197
00:10:54,793 --> 00:10:58,834
‎我要毀掉這些死老太婆
‎把我的網址偷回來

198
00:10:58,918 --> 00:11:00,001
‎地方在這兒

199
00:11:04,918 --> 00:11:09,501
‎你們這些陰道排氣的臭女人
‎幹嘛偷我的巴薩拉克殺死亡達康？

200
00:11:09,584 --> 00:11:11,709
‎巴薩拉克殺死亡是什麼？

201
00:11:11,793 --> 00:11:12,876
‎我們的網址

202
00:11:12,959 --> 00:11:17,501
‎代表莎莎、詩詩和罔兒的
‎美術工藝市集

203
00:11:18,459 --> 00:11:20,084
‎市集又不是那樣寫的

204
00:11:20,168 --> 00:11:23,709
‎因為是莎莎去登記，她很傻

205
00:11:23,793 --> 00:11:25,084
‎妳很賤

206
00:11:27,209 --> 00:11:29,793
‎妳笑什麼？妳很蕩

207
00:11:29,876 --> 00:11:34,584
‎這正是經典互動
‎每個女人都得要是以上三選一

208
00:11:34,668 --> 00:11:36,584
‎-現在快把我的網站還我
‎-不行

209
00:11:36,668 --> 00:11:37,918
‎不行？

210
00:11:38,001 --> 00:11:39,584
‎不行嗎？

211
00:11:42,418 --> 00:11:44,209
‎我們拚老命嘗試過了，走吧

212
00:11:44,293 --> 00:11:46,626
‎等等，不留下來吃起司蛋糕嗎？

213
00:11:46,709 --> 00:11:47,668
‎起司蛋糕？

214
00:11:48,293 --> 00:11:50,543
‎起司蛋糕？

215
00:11:53,043 --> 00:11:57,001
‎所以莎莎把束腹藏在花盆裡

216
00:11:58,959 --> 00:12:00,626
‎真是很典型的莎莎！

217
00:12:00,709 --> 00:12:04,293
‎罔兒，昨天桌擲球妳怎麼沒來？

218
00:12:04,376 --> 00:12:07,293
‎我跟關傑炎在床上

219
00:12:07,376 --> 00:12:11,459
‎合理，妳已經睡了關家另外兩個兄弟

220
00:12:12,876 --> 00:12:17,209
‎妳們有過正常的對話嗎？
‎或者全都是安排好的爆點？

221
00:12:17,293 --> 00:12:19,376
‎誰有興趣玩橋牌嗎？

222
00:12:19,459 --> 00:12:22,751
‎妳是在說撲克牌遊戲？
‎還是妳住的橋下？

223
00:12:22,834 --> 00:12:25,876
‎笑話來得太快了…

224
00:12:26,918 --> 00:12:28,584
‎妳們真是火力全開

225
00:12:29,209 --> 00:12:33,751
‎真的，熱潮紅多到都能煮蛋了

226
00:12:33,834 --> 00:12:35,043
‎妳已經沒蛋可煮了

227
00:12:35,126 --> 00:12:38,209
‎因為之前去找密醫墮胎
‎毀了妳的字宮

228
00:12:40,001 --> 00:12:42,376
‎這我聽了要笑嗎？感覺很沉重

229
00:12:42,459 --> 00:12:47,126
‎她不高興是因為
‎我們不喜歡她的未婚夫哈洛

230
00:12:47,209 --> 00:12:49,709
‎別把哈洛扯進來，我愛他！

231
00:12:50,543 --> 00:12:54,376
‎那個，如果我幫妳們解決掉這個哈洛

232
00:12:54,459 --> 00:12:58,043
‎妳們願意
‎把巴薩拉克殺死亡達康給我嗎？

233
00:12:58,126 --> 00:12:59,834
‎就這麼說定

234
00:12:59,918 --> 00:13:01,126
‎哈洛是瘟神

235
00:13:01,209 --> 00:13:03,001
‎我骨子裡這樣感覺

236
00:13:03,084 --> 00:13:06,168
‎不是，罔兒，那只是因為妳骨質疏鬆

237
00:13:06,251 --> 00:13:10,251
‎我們馬上又回到了說笑話
‎彷彿墮胎那件事從沒發生過

238
00:13:12,751 --> 00:13:14,251
‎顯然我沒有老實說

239
00:13:14,334 --> 00:13:17,793
‎我自己是在銀河永恆的存在

240
00:13:17,876 --> 00:13:19,709
‎你現在看到了我的真面目

241
00:13:19,793 --> 00:13:22,834
‎一定會像其他每個人那樣往反方向跑

242
00:13:22,918 --> 00:13:23,959
‎天啊

243
00:13:24,043 --> 00:13:25,709
‎女人看到我也會這樣

244
00:13:25,793 --> 00:13:28,876
‎她們看到我剝光衣服
‎拿槍指著嘴巴，就一副：

245
00:13:28,959 --> 00:13:31,459
‎“你怎麼跑進我家公寓的？”

246
00:13:31,543 --> 00:13:32,668
‎人們真的很沒禮貌

247
00:13:32,751 --> 00:13:35,251
‎我猜我們只是一對寂寞的怪胎

248
00:13:35,334 --> 00:13:37,251
‎我已經不覺得那樣寂寞了

249
00:13:39,459 --> 00:13:42,418
‎愛是月亮

250
00:13:42,501 --> 00:13:45,668
‎愛是太陽

251
00:13:46,251 --> 00:13:50,626
‎炙熱讓我倆的身體合而為一

252
00:13:52,001 --> 00:13:54,626
‎你我一起

253
00:13:54,709 --> 00:13:57,418
‎如膠似漆

254
00:13:57,501 --> 00:13:59,543
‎這是一場夢…

255
00:13:59,626 --> 00:14:01,793
‎我有任務要給你，貝利

256
00:14:04,584 --> 00:14:07,251
‎愛是一趟旅行

257
00:14:07,751 --> 00:14:10,501
‎一場謎樣的飛行

258
00:14:11,168 --> 00:14:13,834
‎是魔幻帶我們度過重重考驗

259
00:14:13,918 --> 00:14:14,751
‎（極高速）

260
00:14:15,834 --> 00:14:18,834
‎愛對我來說顯而易見…

261
00:14:18,918 --> 00:14:21,876
‎我也有任務要給你，小銀

262
00:14:22,459 --> 00:14:23,959
‎中止任務…

263
00:14:27,918 --> 00:14:31,334
‎小銀，這杯敬我們第一次的浪漫晚餐

264
00:14:31,418 --> 00:14:34,584
‎真甜蜜，貝利，但我不吃人類食物

265
00:14:34,668 --> 00:14:38,209
‎其實我只吃一個東西

266
00:14:45,334 --> 00:14:47,584
‎幹嘛？我齒縫有東西嗎？

267
00:14:48,876 --> 00:14:50,793
‎難怪妳的全名叫做

268
00:14:50,876 --> 00:14:52,668
‎銀河吃世界

269
00:14:52,751 --> 00:14:54,543
‎我還以為妳用電玩當名字

270
00:14:58,251 --> 00:15:02,376
‎我們滿月晚餐，費可竟然遲到

271
00:15:02,459 --> 00:15:04,293
‎誰在乎啊？

272
00:15:04,376 --> 00:15:05,501
‎我要打給他

273
00:15:06,001 --> 00:15:06,834
‎費可？

274
00:15:06,918 --> 00:15:08,126
‎費可，你在哪裡？

275
00:15:08,209 --> 00:15:11,126
‎你錯過我們的滿月晚餐了

276
00:15:12,168 --> 00:15:13,334
‎抱歉，我生病了

277
00:15:13,918 --> 00:15:15,334
‎你怎麼會生病？

278
00:15:15,418 --> 00:15:17,126
‎不要碰我的背，屄臉！

279
00:15:17,793 --> 00:15:19,126
‎滾開，快點！

280
00:15:19,209 --> 00:15:20,043
‎什麼？

281
00:15:20,543 --> 00:15:21,668
‎他掛斷了

282
00:15:21,751 --> 00:15:25,918
‎天啊，我真不敢相信
‎妳考慮要把第一次給那傢伙

283
00:15:26,001 --> 00:15:27,626
‎換做我會更講究一點

284
00:15:27,709 --> 00:15:32,293
‎嘿，老先生，你9點1分有事嗎？
‎要不要來一發？

285
00:15:36,459 --> 00:15:38,876
‎謝天謝地，我在被窩裡很安全

286
00:15:40,626 --> 00:15:41,668
‎蜘蛛表妹！

287
00:15:49,834 --> 00:15:50,668
‎費可？

288
00:15:50,751 --> 00:15:53,084
‎薇兒，這沒有看起來那麼糟

289
00:15:53,168 --> 00:15:56,668
‎這些要硬上我的女生是我的表姐妹

290
00:15:58,959 --> 00:16:00,876
‎（可疑艾克朗鄉村俱樂部）

291
00:16:04,418 --> 00:16:05,668
‎我沒點這個

292
00:16:05,751 --> 00:16:09,501
‎是我請的，久仰大名，哈洛

293
00:16:09,584 --> 00:16:10,751
‎我是芭芭拉克

294
00:16:10,834 --> 00:16:13,793
‎我喜歡打網球，我做的南瓜砂鍋超讚

295
00:16:13,876 --> 00:16:16,084
‎還有我的陰毛像是燒毀的房子

296
00:16:16,168 --> 00:16:17,126
‎想看嗎？

297
00:16:18,043 --> 00:16:19,376
‎妳叫芭芭拉克啊？

298
00:16:19,459 --> 00:16:22,793
‎讀經班的女生都叫我水銀陰道

299
00:16:25,418 --> 00:16:26,709
‎你喜歡打高爾夫嗎？

300
00:16:26,793 --> 00:16:29,418
‎我有兩、三個洞能給你進球

301
00:16:29,501 --> 00:16:33,043
‎其中一個像是沙坑
‎但我不跟你說是哪一個

302
00:16:33,126 --> 00:16:37,084
‎芭芭拉克，妳很美
‎我也很感激妳的提議

303
00:16:37,168 --> 00:16:39,626
‎但我心有所屬了

304
00:16:41,126 --> 00:16:44,293
‎他竟然不想看我被縱火的陰毛

305
00:16:44,376 --> 00:16:46,876
‎我想看妳被縱火的陰毛

306
00:16:46,959 --> 00:16:50,626
‎他說出了每日一詞，好耶！

307
00:16:50,709 --> 00:16:52,918
‎明明是我先說的

308
00:17:00,834 --> 00:17:02,209
‎醒醒啊，小廢物

309
00:17:02,918 --> 00:17:04,501
‎接下來是這樣發展

310
00:17:04,584 --> 00:17:07,126
‎我要先把你痛扁一頓

311
00:17:07,209 --> 00:17:10,501
‎然後你要永遠離開這顆星球

312
00:17:10,584 --> 00:17:12,418
‎是會有痛扁

313
00:17:12,501 --> 00:17:14,876
‎但不會是我被痛扁

314
00:17:14,959 --> 00:17:16,668
‎木偶師！

315
00:17:20,168 --> 00:17:23,001
‎不用手下留情，木偶師

316
00:17:26,584 --> 00:17:28,918
‎你是啥鬼東西？芝麻街快打旋風？

317
00:17:29,001 --> 00:17:31,876
‎木偶師！劉康腳踏車踢

318
00:17:41,418 --> 00:17:44,668
‎那肯定是全宇宙最厲害的木偶師

319
00:17:44,751 --> 00:17:47,001
‎木偶師，了結他！

320
00:17:52,626 --> 00:17:54,334
‎救命！我被攻擊了

321
00:17:54,418 --> 00:17:58,084
‎這個人攻擊皇室成員

322
00:17:58,168 --> 00:18:00,584
‎最高可處以死刑！

323
00:18:00,668 --> 00:18:02,959
‎芙萊咪，我連一拳都沒揮

324
00:18:03,043 --> 00:18:05,876
‎這也很合理
‎因為我是來幫他蓋被子的

325
00:18:05,959 --> 00:18:07,584
‎規定就是那樣

326
00:18:07,668 --> 00:18:09,001
‎我沒有選擇

327
00:18:09,084 --> 00:18:11,043
‎必須執行處決

328
00:18:11,126 --> 00:18:13,001
‎你呢，假髮舅？

329
00:18:13,084 --> 00:18:14,209
‎巴拉

330
00:18:14,293 --> 00:18:17,209
‎木偶師，讓我對他吐口水

331
00:18:19,126 --> 00:18:20,043
‎潑濺

332
00:18:20,126 --> 00:18:21,959
‎你今天想去哪吃晚餐？

333
00:18:22,043 --> 00:18:25,501
‎我想要吃冰封星球，或許要有星環的

334
00:18:25,584 --> 00:18:26,584
‎對，說到那個

335
00:18:26,668 --> 00:18:29,334
‎想說不知道會不會是個好主意

336
00:18:29,418 --> 00:18:32,251
‎就是妳或許可以少吃點行星

337
00:18:32,334 --> 00:18:34,959
‎這是什麼意思？你嫌我胖嗎？

338
00:18:35,043 --> 00:18:39,626
‎不是…是和一次殺掉
‎好幾十億無辜的人比較有關

339
00:18:39,709 --> 00:18:42,043
‎何不吃無人居住的星球？

340
00:18:42,126 --> 00:18:45,376
‎又來了，吃素的動不動就愛說吃素

341
00:18:45,459 --> 00:18:47,709
‎是這樣的，和妳在一起讓我好開心

342
00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:50,959
‎我腦中的聲音已經好幾天
‎沒有叫我拿霰彈槍往嘴裡塞了

343
00:18:51,043 --> 00:18:55,209
‎只是我對星球種族滅絕有點小問題

344
00:18:55,293 --> 00:18:56,251
‎這樣看吧

345
00:18:56,334 --> 00:18:59,918
‎每次洗手
‎都會殺掉好幾十億個次等的有機體

346
00:19:00,001 --> 00:19:03,126
‎我是在做一樣的事，一天三餐

347
00:19:03,709 --> 00:19:05,001
‎很有道理耶

348
00:19:05,084 --> 00:19:08,334
‎布拉龐13，這顆星球當晚餐正好

349
00:19:08,418 --> 00:19:11,959
‎你要不要行行好
‎先幫我去給無辜的人抹上照燒醬？

350
00:19:12,043 --> 00:19:15,626
‎貝利此刻陷入了很棘手的狀況

351
00:19:15,709 --> 00:19:19,334
‎他要聽從女友或是自己的良心？

352
00:19:19,418 --> 00:19:23,376
‎感覺最簡單的方法
‎就是把霰彈槍塞進嘴裡開槍

353
00:19:23,459 --> 00:19:25,084
‎可惡，腦中的聲音回來了

354
00:19:30,376 --> 00:19:31,709
‎我需要跟薇兒說話

355
00:19:31,793 --> 00:19:33,251
‎她不在這兒

356
00:19:33,334 --> 00:19:35,834
‎就算她在，也不會想跟你說話

357
00:19:35,918 --> 00:19:37,959
‎你算哪種性成癮的變態啊？

358
00:19:38,709 --> 00:19:40,043
‎9點了嗎？

359
00:19:40,126 --> 00:19:41,209
‎快了

360
00:19:41,293 --> 00:19:45,043
‎如果薇兒在這兒
‎我要跟她說我沒背叛她

361
00:19:45,126 --> 00:19:49,084
‎我的家人想要強迫我
‎讓我的表姐妹懷孕

362
00:19:50,043 --> 00:19:51,293
‎可惜呢

363
00:19:51,376 --> 00:19:55,001
‎我想我的表姐妹
‎在得逞之前絕不會停手

364
00:19:55,084 --> 00:19:56,751
‎但我不想要背叛薇兒

365
00:19:56,834 --> 00:19:59,459
‎所以我剛才花了20分鐘收集了這些

366
00:19:59,543 --> 00:20:02,043
‎-那是什麼？
‎-我的精液，將近四公升

367
00:20:03,126 --> 00:20:05,293
‎好，可以麻煩加個蓋子嗎？

368
00:20:05,376 --> 00:20:08,959
‎我要把這些給我的表姐妹
‎免得她們霸王硬上弓

369
00:20:09,043 --> 00:20:11,668
‎剛才是我人生中最痛苦的20分鐘

370
00:20:11,751 --> 00:20:15,584
‎但我收集了快四公升的精液
‎因為我愛薇兒

371
00:20:15,668 --> 00:20:18,418
‎天啊，這肯定是…

372
00:20:18,501 --> 00:20:21,793
‎任何人對我做過最甜蜜的事

373
00:20:21,876 --> 00:20:25,251
‎天啊，妳從頭到尾都在這兒？

374
00:20:26,543 --> 00:20:29,543
‎費可，我準備好要做了

375
00:20:29,626 --> 00:20:33,668
‎現在？我現在有點乾涸
‎再說房間裡人蠻多的

376
00:20:33,751 --> 00:20:36,959
‎此時此地是屬於我們的

377
00:20:42,543 --> 00:20:46,168
‎天啊，費可，已經過9點了

378
00:20:46,251 --> 00:20:49,001
‎你跟我姐妹偷人！

379
00:20:49,918 --> 00:20:50,959
‎你好噁心

380
00:20:51,043 --> 00:20:52,459
‎你的良心在哪裡？

381
00:20:59,376 --> 00:21:01,959
‎很抱歉搞成這樣，親愛的

382
00:21:02,043 --> 00:21:04,459
‎我就說你們家絕對不會喜歡我

383
00:21:04,543 --> 00:21:08,209
‎歡迎來到處決舞會

384
00:21:08,293 --> 00:21:09,168
‎木偶師！

385
00:21:13,126 --> 00:21:15,501
‎你是不是忘了什麼？

386
00:21:15,584 --> 00:21:16,418
‎我真蠢

387
00:21:16,501 --> 00:21:22,376
‎傳統上在進行處決之前
‎都要有營養補給典禮

388
00:21:22,459 --> 00:21:23,876
‎把她吊起來

389
00:21:36,418 --> 00:21:37,876
‎哈咪怎麼了？

390
00:21:37,959 --> 00:21:40,626
‎誰都不許惹我的家人！

391
00:21:51,293 --> 00:21:52,501
‎糟糕

392
00:22:00,459 --> 00:22:03,459
‎我會把你們的骨頭當成晚飯餐具

393
00:22:03,543 --> 00:22:06,709
‎把你們的皮膚當成起居室的地毯

394
00:22:06,793 --> 00:22:08,418
‎要死了，女人

395
00:22:08,501 --> 00:22:11,959
‎這是我見過最胡搞瞎搞又無情的事

396
00:22:12,043 --> 00:22:14,876
‎我也從來沒有這樣迷戀妳

397
00:22:14,959 --> 00:22:18,251
‎我要帶妳見識妳絕不會相信的激情夜

398
00:22:18,334 --> 00:22:19,376
‎木偶師！

399
00:22:21,793 --> 00:22:24,084
‎對…就是那裡

400
00:22:24,168 --> 00:22:26,126
‎木偶師，來收尾吧

401
00:22:29,501 --> 00:22:30,334
‎潑濺

402
00:22:33,126 --> 00:22:36,709
‎莎莎，我有關於哈洛的壞消息

403
00:22:36,793 --> 00:22:40,334
‎結果妳朋友說的都沒錯

404
00:22:40,418 --> 00:22:42,126
‎他是壞人

405
00:22:47,376 --> 00:22:49,709
‎你幹嘛把哈洛的臉
‎都合在我們的身體上？

406
00:22:49,793 --> 00:22:52,293
‎你叫我這樣做，還說會很爆笑

407
00:22:52,376 --> 00:22:53,959
‎我喝醉的時候別聽我的

408
00:22:54,043 --> 00:22:58,334
‎天啊，哈洛跟雙胞胎兄弟上床

409
00:22:58,418 --> 00:22:59,418
‎結束了！

410
00:23:02,418 --> 00:23:04,251
‎怪怪，她真的很蠢

411
00:23:04,334 --> 00:23:08,418
‎幹得好，巴薩拉克
‎我們現在就把網域轉移給你

412
00:23:10,668 --> 00:23:11,876
‎我做不到

413
00:23:11,959 --> 00:23:15,626
‎莎莎，我絕不會為了一個網址
‎就毀了妳的人生

414
00:23:15,709 --> 00:23:17,251
‎那段影片是我假造的

415
00:23:17,334 --> 00:23:20,751
‎我試著讓哈洛背叛妳，但他不願意

416
00:23:20,834 --> 00:23:26,251
‎他是很棒的傢伙，妳應該嫁給他

417
00:23:26,334 --> 00:23:29,334
‎我在此宣布兩位結為夫妻

418
00:23:30,543 --> 00:23:35,334
‎抱歉我們本來信不過哈洛
‎我們只是怕妳會受傷

419
00:23:35,418 --> 00:23:40,043
‎但巴薩拉克都願意擔保了
‎哈洛顯然是好人

420
00:23:40,126 --> 00:23:41,459
‎來抱抱

421
00:23:42,668 --> 00:23:43,793
‎三位，我得走了

422
00:23:43,876 --> 00:23:47,209
‎但我很高興有些故事真有快樂的結局

423
00:23:51,001 --> 00:23:52,043
‎我忘了拿鑰匙

424
00:23:54,543 --> 00:23:58,459
‎哈洛，你幹了啥好事？
‎你這個死神經病，你殺了她們！

425
00:23:58,543 --> 00:24:00,751
‎是啊，我是連環殺手

426
00:24:00,834 --> 00:24:01,793
‎搞什麼鬼啊？

427
00:24:02,459 --> 00:24:05,084
‎我才懶得管，我會在我的房間

428
00:24:06,793 --> 00:24:10,793
‎哇塞，罔兒說你是瘟神
‎我猜她說得對

429
00:24:10,876 --> 00:24:16,084
‎但我想了想
‎這其實替我解決了網站問題

430
00:24:16,168 --> 00:24:19,376
‎各位，介紹我的新爪牙

431
00:24:19,459 --> 00:24:20,626
‎哈洛！

432
00:24:20,709 --> 00:24:22,709
‎大人，你確定…

433
00:24:22,793 --> 00:24:24,918
‎把刀子藏起來，不會有事的

434
00:24:25,001 --> 00:24:26,834
‎大家好，我是哈洛

435
00:24:26,918 --> 00:24:29,126
‎他說了每日一詞！

436
00:24:29,209 --> 00:24:30,376
‎（哈洛）

437
00:24:30,459 --> 00:24:32,876
‎你們當我是空氣嗎？

438
00:24:36,293 --> 00:24:41,084
‎所以這個星球上
‎是坐著輪椅、可愛的癌症病友

439
00:24:41,168 --> 00:24:42,501
‎我們也是孤兒

440
00:24:42,584 --> 00:24:44,501
‎我們擁有大好的未來

441
00:24:46,876 --> 00:24:49,584
‎抱歉，孩子
‎我沒辦法再中出另一個人的先生了

442
00:24:49,668 --> 00:24:51,334
‎對，手臂舉起來

443
00:24:52,834 --> 00:24:55,626
‎愛人，人類滷汁做得怎麼樣了？

444
00:24:55,709 --> 00:24:59,418
‎聽著，那個星球上有很多好孩童…

445
00:25:00,168 --> 00:25:01,626
‎孩童好甜美

446
00:25:01,709 --> 00:25:05,001
‎也很軟嫩，感覺像是在吃烤星

447
00:25:11,459 --> 00:25:12,793
‎貝利，你在幹嘛？

448
00:25:12,876 --> 00:25:15,293
‎我愛妳，但我不能讓妳這樣做

449
00:25:15,376 --> 00:25:17,751
‎貝利！不要！

450
00:25:19,126 --> 00:25:21,543
‎你有這個能力，怎麼不早點用？

451
00:25:21,626 --> 00:25:24,043
‎我想說如果妳變小
‎能跟其他男生交往

452
00:25:24,126 --> 00:25:26,209
‎就不會再搭理我了

453
00:25:26,293 --> 00:25:27,501
‎貝利啊

454
00:25:27,584 --> 00:25:28,709
‎你說得完全正確

455
00:25:28,793 --> 00:25:29,751
‎永遠再見

456
00:25:30,709 --> 00:25:32,001
‎等等，最後一件事

457
00:25:32,084 --> 00:25:33,168
‎這個可以借我嗎？

458
00:25:40,043 --> 00:25:41,668
‎照燒真的很好吃

459
00:25:43,334 --> 00:25:46,251
‎愛是月亮

460
00:25:46,334 --> 00:25:49,793
‎愛是太陽

461
00:25:49,876 --> 00:25:54,751
‎炙熱讓我倆的身體合而為一

462
00:25:55,834 --> 00:25:58,751
‎你我一起

463
00:25:58,834 --> 00:26:01,209
‎如膠似漆

464
00:26:01,293 --> 00:26:07,751
‎對我來說這是一場夢

465
00:26:08,334 --> 00:26:10,751
‎愛是一趟旅行

466
00:26:11,334 --> 00:26:14,751
‎一場謎樣的飛行

467
00:26:14,834 --> 00:26:19,751
‎是魔幻帶我們度過重重考驗

468
00:26:19,834 --> 00:26:25,751
‎愛對我來說顯而易見，就是你

469
00:26:25,834 --> 00:26:30,751
‎字幕翻譯：姚祖恩