1 00:00:58,934 --> 00:01:01,562 Hi, this is Joey Shorter with Brightside Lunar Residences. 2 00:01:02,646 --> 00:01:04,105 How can I be of assistance... 3 00:01:11,738 --> 00:01:14,157 Imagine with me, Mrs. McKenna, 4 00:01:14,157 --> 00:01:18,120 those zinnias stretching skyward in reduced gravity. 5 00:01:18,120 --> 00:01:19,621 - What a sight. - One minute, exactly. 6 00:01:19,621 --> 00:01:21,498 Holographic wallpaper? You got it. 7 00:01:21,498 --> 00:01:22,958 Of course. I'll call you back. 8 00:01:22,958 --> 00:01:25,085 You know, you feel like family, Howard. You do. 9 00:01:25,085 --> 00:01:28,589 Which is why I'm gonna get you the very same deal I got my own ma. 10 00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:30,215 No. Hold on one second, sir. 11 00:01:30,215 --> 00:01:33,385 Shirl, chalk me up a B-Plex. Lot B5, crater-view. 12 00:01:33,385 --> 00:01:36,972 Herb, you come fry a ham steak on my bare chest over here, 13 00:01:36,972 --> 00:01:39,558 because I am just so hot, baby. 14 00:01:39,558 --> 00:01:41,727 Ed, stop. I don't have a ham steak. 15 00:01:41,727 --> 00:01:45,314 God forbid, Jack, I disappoint you with another one of these ads. 16 00:01:45,314 --> 00:01:46,690 We might all end up rich. 17 00:01:46,690 --> 00:01:51,153 Well, then we'll call it even on you being dead wrong on the new kid. 18 00:01:51,153 --> 00:01:52,863 Would you like a strong coffee pot? 19 00:01:52,863 --> 00:01:54,948 Hey, who wants to mop this one up? Easy money. 20 00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:57,409 - Joey, you could take it. - Yeah, I got it, Jack. 21 00:01:58,535 --> 00:02:01,496 Hi, this is Joey Shorter with Brightside Lunar Residences. 22 00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:03,999 It's great that you heard our ad on the radio. 23 00:02:03,999 --> 00:02:07,419 It's too bad about our Volts, but we'll shock 'em next time, right? 24 00:02:07,419 --> 00:02:09,253 Okay. Patch me in, Shirl. 25 00:02:09,253 --> 00:02:12,216 Careful, Herb. New kid's coming for your lunch money. 26 00:02:12,841 --> 00:02:14,384 Now, if you could just give me... 27 00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:22,267 I'm a guy who takes "No" for, "Let's just keep talking until 'yes.'" 28 00:02:22,267 --> 00:02:25,229 You've gotta be proud, Mrs. Shizlitski, with your son in the lunar mines. 29 00:02:25,229 --> 00:02:26,980 And what could make him happier 30 00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:32,236 than his beloved ma being a quarter of a million miles closer to him, right? 31 00:02:33,153 --> 00:02:34,947 Hey Shirl, patch me in again. 32 00:02:34,947 --> 00:02:37,407 I got another one. It's a C-Plex, C12. 33 00:02:38,700 --> 00:02:40,911 Welcome to second place, kid. 34 00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:46,458 Where's Herb? Did he just hear that and jump out the window? 35 00:02:46,458 --> 00:02:48,293 You know what? It's getting late. 36 00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:51,922 Let's call it a night, stay fresh for tomorrow's leads. 37 00:02:51,922 --> 00:02:53,632 I'm all good to keep going, Jack. 38 00:02:53,632 --> 00:02:55,300 You stay that hungry, kid. 39 00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:58,136 Desperation, a salesman's greatest asset. 40 00:02:58,136 --> 00:02:59,513 I am living proof of that. 41 00:02:59,513 --> 00:03:01,390 This kid's got some real dog in him. 42 00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:03,976 He stole second place, and all he wants is more. 43 00:03:04,726 --> 00:03:07,646 Let's knock off and run a victory lap. 44 00:03:12,401 --> 00:03:14,862 Take this then. That's all of it. 45 00:03:14,862 --> 00:03:19,658 Great. You'll be thrilled to know that you are now likely to be working 46 00:03:19,658 --> 00:03:22,744 with the team's number two top seller this evening. 47 00:03:23,412 --> 00:03:24,788 I'll get you on the first launch out. 48 00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:27,875 Jesus, am I supposed to read all this? 49 00:03:28,375 --> 00:03:29,376 Technically, yes. 50 00:03:30,377 --> 00:03:32,880 But time is your most precious asset. 51 00:03:40,637 --> 00:03:41,638 That's it. 52 00:03:43,599 --> 00:03:45,434 You won't be disappointed, ma'am. 53 00:03:45,434 --> 00:03:48,687 The next quarterly launch is scheduled in just a few quick months. 54 00:03:48,687 --> 00:03:53,192 Months? No. That's not possible. 55 00:03:53,192 --> 00:03:56,820 We're not talking about a bus to Sun City, ma'am. 56 00:03:57,779 --> 00:04:00,824 This is a state-of-the-art rocket launch, scheduled quarterly, 57 00:04:01,325 --> 00:04:02,993 as contractually specified. 58 00:04:07,456 --> 00:04:10,125 - So, I'll just go get this processed. - No. 59 00:04:10,125 --> 00:04:11,376 You don't understand! 60 00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:14,338 I have to go now. 61 00:04:14,922 --> 00:04:18,966 You're on the same great schedule as all our customers. 62 00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:28,143 But I also don't believe in impossible, so I'll be Mr. Do-All-I-Can for you. 63 00:04:28,143 --> 00:04:29,353 First thing tomorrow morning. 64 00:04:30,771 --> 00:04:35,150 But... I have nowhere else to go. 65 00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:43,033 Can I help you with transportation? 66 00:04:44,159 --> 00:04:48,664 A man of your accomplishments needs a drink in his hands. 67 00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:53,502 One day on the road to a lifetime. 68 00:04:54,878 --> 00:04:56,088 Thanks, Jack. 69 00:04:56,088 --> 00:04:57,548 Wow, this is really great. 70 00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:04,304 You know, I sold one to my old algebra teacher, Mr. Klein. 71 00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:09,685 I was just thinking about him up there one day, you know, looking down at us. 72 00:05:10,185 --> 00:05:13,313 And it's all thanks to me. Kinda. You know? 73 00:05:16,024 --> 00:05:17,943 Wow, look at that. 74 00:05:17,943 --> 00:05:22,322 Look at that. 75 00:05:23,198 --> 00:05:26,952 - Wow. - Yeah, wow, that must be the 568. 76 00:05:26,952 --> 00:05:28,954 I should've brought the whole gang out here to see it. 77 00:05:28,954 --> 00:05:31,373 - That's one of ours? - Yeah, I think so. Must be. 78 00:05:32,749 --> 00:05:35,794 Oh, man, it'd be great to see one up close one day. 79 00:05:35,794 --> 00:05:37,880 Oh, kid, just you wait. 80 00:05:43,635 --> 00:05:46,388 Okay. Yeah, I should grab the bus. 81 00:05:46,388 --> 00:05:48,599 It's getting pretty late to be stopping by Mom. 82 00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:56,023 Or, at this hour, I mean, we can get you a room here for the night. 83 00:05:57,441 --> 00:05:58,275 Yeah? 84 00:06:00,819 --> 00:06:02,070 I mean, I don't really need-- 85 00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:05,616 You are way past the business of what you need, kid. 86 00:06:05,616 --> 00:06:07,951 It's time for what you deserve. 87 00:06:13,832 --> 00:06:15,834 You know where this would look a whole lot nicer? 88 00:06:15,834 --> 00:06:17,002 On you, Shirley. 89 00:06:17,002 --> 00:06:21,256 Kinda confetti-strewn, little to no other garments, or-- 90 00:06:21,256 --> 00:06:24,051 Am I getting ahead of myself by about 12 minutes here? 91 00:06:27,012 --> 00:06:28,222 But who's measuring, right? 92 00:06:28,805 --> 00:06:31,058 Abundance is fucking abundance, Shirley. 93 00:06:31,058 --> 00:06:35,229 Your abundance is fixing my car and your problems tomorrow. 94 00:06:35,229 --> 00:06:37,898 Problems, car, tomorrow. Ding, ding, ding. 95 00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:41,944 All right, you guys. Have a good night and just, thanks for everything. 96 00:06:41,944 --> 00:06:43,570 It's Captain Puberty. 97 00:06:43,570 --> 00:06:45,239 How you doing? You all good for bus fare? 98 00:06:45,239 --> 00:06:48,200 Ignore him, Joe. He's terrified of anyone younger than he is. 99 00:06:48,867 --> 00:06:50,577 No, Jack's grabbing me a room, actually. 100 00:06:51,370 --> 00:06:54,206 Okay. You gonna be ready to pack out with us tomorrow? 101 00:06:55,207 --> 00:06:58,001 Pack out? What about all the great leads we've got here? 102 00:06:58,001 --> 00:06:59,461 Day's work, then wheels up. 103 00:06:59,461 --> 00:07:01,421 We're lucky we got all we did out of this town. 104 00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:04,925 Right. So there's never someone who sticks around just to work local? 105 00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:06,927 Well, that's kind of the thing about traveling salesmen, kid. 106 00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:08,345 They do tend to travel. 107 00:07:08,971 --> 00:07:11,974 Shirley, you wanna go grab that sizable form I mentioned? 108 00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:15,853 It's okay if the road's not for you, Joe. You did good tonight. 109 00:07:16,353 --> 00:07:17,604 Yeah, you did. 110 00:07:18,105 --> 00:07:20,023 We'll send you a card on your 12th birthday. 111 00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:23,235 Have a wonderful evening. 112 00:07:23,235 --> 00:07:25,279 Joe. Jack's not here? 113 00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:26,572 You just missed him. Why? 114 00:07:27,865 --> 00:07:29,449 Certain developments is all. 115 00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:32,870 Regarding fairness, which always favors the actual winners. 116 00:07:33,704 --> 00:07:37,040 Good evening, guest. How can I make your stay more pleasant? 117 00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:46,008 {\an8}Every man's a king, Herb-O As long as every man is me, Herb-O 118 00:07:46,008 --> 00:07:50,429 Oh, she loves me, she loves me Oh, oh, oh 119 00:07:50,429 --> 00:07:52,264 Oh, Jesus! Who are you? 120 00:07:53,015 --> 00:07:55,100 - You're not Herb at all. - He told me I could sleep here. 121 00:07:55,100 --> 00:07:58,812 Boy, for a mealy-minded, congenitally limp fella like him-- 122 00:07:58,812 --> 00:07:59,897 Get out! Go! 123 00:07:59,897 --> 00:08:01,356 All right, forgive me, 124 00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:04,401 hot-blooded woman who is way outta Herb's league. 125 00:08:04,401 --> 00:08:07,946 This is half my room as well, but no, I'll gladly vacate. 126 00:08:07,946 --> 00:08:11,617 Wait, hey. He said he would get me on an earlier launch. Did he? 127 00:08:11,617 --> 00:08:15,621 Oh, God, Herb. Good luck, toots. Seriously. 128 00:08:19,416 --> 00:08:23,086 Jacky boy, you're hoarding my handsome grandson. 129 00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:27,382 Sure, you're ashamed of me, but don't overestimate my patience. 130 00:08:28,258 --> 00:08:29,259 Delete. 131 00:08:29,927 --> 00:08:34,765 Every day you're here and not delivering Joey, who I am owed, 132 00:08:34,765 --> 00:08:36,600 I die faster. 133 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:37,683 Delete. 134 00:08:38,644 --> 00:08:40,062 Down in a flash. 135 00:08:40,062 --> 00:08:41,772 I need a minute, Jack. 136 00:08:43,273 --> 00:08:44,274 Fuck. 137 00:08:44,274 --> 00:08:47,069 All right, anything for you, Shirl, anytime. 138 00:08:55,953 --> 00:08:59,289 - Hey. - Fifteen units in three hours. 139 00:08:59,289 --> 00:09:04,294 Considering we did 48 the last three months, I'd call it an eventful evening. 140 00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:07,589 You know-- Could you help me pick out a tie? 141 00:09:09,925 --> 00:09:14,471 Yes, we are making big waves. Big, big, big, big waves. 142 00:09:14,471 --> 00:09:17,224 You know, I shouldn't be thinking like this, 143 00:09:17,224 --> 00:09:19,768 but if Jenkins hits us with more delays now, 144 00:09:19,768 --> 00:09:22,271 this whole town is gonna grab pitchforks. 145 00:09:22,271 --> 00:09:24,565 Well, that'll be HQ's problem 'cause we'll be long gone. 146 00:09:24,565 --> 00:09:27,442 That is the right call, Shirl. 147 00:09:27,943 --> 00:09:30,279 Oak Grove has a county fair tomorrow. 148 00:09:30,279 --> 00:09:31,780 I got prices on ad buys. 149 00:09:31,780 --> 00:09:34,741 Plus, a regional spread plan profit projection. 150 00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:37,619 Lots of potential we never had the stones to tap. 151 00:09:37,619 --> 00:09:42,875 This is also all stuff that you are not paid enough to worry about. 152 00:09:42,875 --> 00:09:45,210 Well, whosever job it is, I'm better at it. 153 00:09:48,005 --> 00:09:51,175 I'm not saying ambition doesn't look great on you. It does. 154 00:09:51,175 --> 00:09:52,634 But let's... 155 00:09:55,220 --> 00:09:56,346 Let's just hit the road. 156 00:09:57,055 --> 00:10:01,226 Keep working doors like we know how. Crawl before we corner the market. 157 00:10:01,226 --> 00:10:03,312 Of course. Who doesn't wanna make less money? 158 00:10:03,312 --> 00:10:05,647 Me, Shirl. 159 00:10:05,647 --> 00:10:09,193 I've got a boss, and bosses are violent, irrational creatures, 160 00:10:09,193 --> 00:10:13,155 especially when you start spending their budgets however the hell you want. 161 00:10:15,866 --> 00:10:20,954 One day, when Brightside's bigger than sliced bread and you and me run the show, 162 00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:23,957 we will be rich enough to make up our own rules. 163 00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:27,211 Ready when you are. 164 00:10:27,211 --> 00:10:28,670 Hey, Jack, it's me. 165 00:10:29,505 --> 00:10:30,797 Too bad Joey won't travel. 166 00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:33,634 - I see some of what you're seeing. - Won't travel? 167 00:10:35,677 --> 00:10:37,054 Jack, you got a minute? 168 00:10:38,222 --> 00:10:39,348 - Hey, good morning. - Hey. 169 00:10:39,348 --> 00:10:40,432 Hey, Shirl. 170 00:10:40,432 --> 00:10:43,310 I was just coming by to say thanks for everything. 171 00:10:43,310 --> 00:10:44,770 I gotta go home. 172 00:10:44,770 --> 00:10:47,397 Well, hey-- Let me give you a ride. Okay? 173 00:10:47,397 --> 00:10:48,732 Got something I wanna show you. 174 00:10:48,732 --> 00:10:49,816 Let's go. 175 00:10:50,901 --> 00:10:52,444 It only looked like I was in last place, 176 00:10:52,444 --> 00:10:55,572 and that's with Jack handing this Joey certain advantages, 177 00:10:55,572 --> 00:10:58,283 which he needs, of course, given his total lack of expertise. 178 00:10:58,283 --> 00:11:03,080 Herbie, you're not letting life on the road get to you again, are you? 179 00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:06,124 - Remember, we're stronger than that. - Much stronger. 180 00:11:06,124 --> 00:11:07,709 So much stro-- 181 00:11:08,836 --> 00:11:11,797 Wait, Herbie, what is that scarf? 182 00:11:12,756 --> 00:11:14,633 That women's scarf there on your bed. 183 00:11:19,388 --> 00:11:25,185 You see, honey, I can't say for certain what that scarf is or whose, 184 00:11:25,185 --> 00:11:28,188 because I was not present when it was left there. 185 00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:30,774 I'm alone, every day. 186 00:11:30,774 --> 00:11:36,363 And I'm here for you, your eternal rock, with our twins growing inside me, 187 00:11:36,363 --> 00:11:41,451 and you have a scarf. You have a scarf! 188 00:11:45,122 --> 00:11:47,541 A car like this. All the home a salesman ever needs. 189 00:11:48,125 --> 00:11:51,003 - Oh, man. - Hey, don't be shy, kid, open her up. 190 00:11:51,545 --> 00:11:53,338 - You sure? - Yeah, see what she got. 191 00:11:54,047 --> 00:11:55,048 Here goes nothing. 192 00:12:04,641 --> 00:12:06,685 That's right, kid. Ten and two, right there, you got it. 193 00:12:06,685 --> 00:12:08,270 This thing's pretty powerful. 194 00:12:08,270 --> 00:12:09,646 Yeah, it is. 195 00:12:10,814 --> 00:12:16,236 So, Joe, we head out tonight, and I would be honored 196 00:12:16,737 --> 00:12:22,409 to have the most promising rookie salesman I've ever met in convoy with us. 197 00:12:22,409 --> 00:12:24,912 And you can drive your new car here too. 198 00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:26,830 What do you mean? 199 00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:30,834 What, you don't like it? We'll swap it out, but frankly, I think it suits you. 200 00:12:31,793 --> 00:12:33,170 You didn't buy this for me. 201 00:12:33,170 --> 00:12:38,383 You didn't think any of this would be as good as it is, but... here we are. 202 00:12:51,522 --> 00:12:53,065 You know, it's just-- 203 00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:58,237 - It's just too much. Jack, it's-- No. - No. 204 00:12:58,237 --> 00:13:00,697 Don't get hung up, kid. Call it a company car. 205 00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:03,075 You work with us, you get to drive it. That simple. 206 00:13:03,075 --> 00:13:04,868 Yeah, you don't have to sell me on it, Jack. 207 00:13:04,868 --> 00:13:06,828 I'm not going to go. 208 00:13:06,828 --> 00:13:09,623 I can't leave my mom. 209 00:13:14,211 --> 00:13:15,212 I can't. 210 00:13:38,485 --> 00:13:40,696 You haven't seen Jack, have you? 211 00:13:40,696 --> 00:13:44,283 Herb, my compliments. I met your conjugal visitor from last night. 212 00:13:44,283 --> 00:13:46,577 Well, I was very wrong about you. 213 00:13:46,577 --> 00:13:50,205 You're actually very wrong about being wrong about me. 214 00:13:50,205 --> 00:13:53,542 I provided her with our customer service hotline, which should be very helpful. 215 00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:57,254 Now you're ducking her like a regular Don Juan, and-- just-- It's shocking. 216 00:13:57,254 --> 00:14:00,257 No one's ducking or shocking or anything. 217 00:14:00,257 --> 00:14:02,342 Why does everyone think I'm a sex maniac? 218 00:14:02,342 --> 00:14:04,553 It's a fair question. Let me ask you something. 219 00:14:04,553 --> 00:14:07,890 Now, you saw this in a shop window, huh? Singing you a love song. 220 00:14:07,890 --> 00:14:11,310 Would you not put aside certain other pertinent concerns? 221 00:14:11,310 --> 00:14:15,606 Look at this. Look at that. AutoColor, huh? Goes with everything. 222 00:14:15,606 --> 00:14:16,815 Very impressive. 223 00:14:17,816 --> 00:14:20,110 Okay, just slowly walk away, okay? 224 00:14:20,694 --> 00:14:22,654 I know you have a million and one stupid fucking questions. 225 00:14:22,654 --> 00:14:25,240 For once, please save them and get outta here. 226 00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:26,366 Take that bag of money. 227 00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:28,327 Probably time I just give it to Shirl. 228 00:14:28,952 --> 00:14:30,287 Hey there, pal. 229 00:14:31,121 --> 00:14:34,666 There you are. I've been looking all over for you, Fred. 230 00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:39,338 Third visit on this tab, Ed. Third visits hurt. 231 00:14:39,338 --> 00:14:41,423 Great news. Payday is tomorrow. 232 00:14:41,423 --> 00:14:44,009 You'll find me right here, Fred. Come on, you'll have every cent. 233 00:14:44,009 --> 00:14:46,637 Money or pain, pal. It's your call. 234 00:14:48,805 --> 00:14:52,142 Come on, you gotta have something on ya. Anything. 235 00:14:56,063 --> 00:14:57,356 Fred, I got nothing. 236 00:14:59,066 --> 00:15:00,108 You unlucky bum. 237 00:15:00,108 --> 00:15:03,278 All right, easy. Okay, hey. Come on. Please? 238 00:15:03,779 --> 00:15:05,948 I can walk myself, all right? Big boy now. 239 00:15:07,074 --> 00:15:09,451 Have a wonderful afternoon. 240 00:15:09,451 --> 00:15:13,997 Hello, and thank you for calling the Brightside Lunar Residences, 241 00:15:13,997 --> 00:15:16,750 where you'll live your brighter tomorrow today. 242 00:15:16,750 --> 00:15:18,961 For Sales, press one. 243 00:15:18,961 --> 00:15:21,755 For more about the Brightside, press two. 244 00:15:24,258 --> 00:15:26,009 For Sales, press one. 245 00:15:26,593 --> 00:15:29,221 For more about the Brightside, press two. 246 00:15:29,221 --> 00:15:31,181 Invalid entry. 247 00:15:33,016 --> 00:15:39,815 Invalid entry. 248 00:15:42,693 --> 00:15:46,321 Sorry, none of our sales associates are available to take your call. 249 00:16:03,130 --> 00:16:04,131 Follow. 250 00:16:25,194 --> 00:16:29,031 You cut me off, but his name was "Herb Porter," 251 00:16:29,031 --> 00:16:31,200 and he should be fired immediately 252 00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:33,619 because I never would have done this if he hadn't let me think-- 253 00:16:34,912 --> 00:16:37,497 And now I'm stuck here in this dingy motel 254 00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:41,293 with nothing in my suitcase but goddamn loungewear for the moon. 255 00:16:42,836 --> 00:16:46,340 Waiting three months with no home to go back to? 256 00:16:46,340 --> 00:16:48,592 I thought I was leaving right away. 257 00:16:48,592 --> 00:16:51,929 Do you know what it took to get here? 258 00:16:52,930 --> 00:16:56,266 Are these the offices of Brightside Lunar "Redisences?" 259 00:16:56,266 --> 00:16:58,227 Yeah, what can I do for ya? 260 00:16:59,895 --> 00:17:04,148 I'll need to speak with the manager or operationally deputized "sudorbinate." 261 00:17:04,775 --> 00:17:06,026 Yeah, guess I'll do. 262 00:17:07,236 --> 00:17:09,738 - Location of corporate enterprise? - Excuse me? 263 00:17:09,738 --> 00:17:11,656 Location of corporate enterprise? 264 00:17:12,281 --> 00:17:13,282 Where's HQ, you mean? 265 00:17:14,076 --> 00:17:14,992 The moon. 266 00:17:16,787 --> 00:17:19,665 - Form 703C, please. - Yeah, now you stumped me. 267 00:17:20,290 --> 00:17:21,541 Fetch 703C. 268 00:17:22,876 --> 00:17:26,588 Pursuant to the non-local entity's unpermitted broadcast advertisements 269 00:17:26,588 --> 00:17:28,089 on WYBS, 270 00:17:28,089 --> 00:17:33,804 you are required to file a 703C Statement of Disclosure. 271 00:17:33,804 --> 00:17:34,763 Down. 272 00:17:35,347 --> 00:17:39,393 Per entity, per transaction, in "triclipate." 273 00:17:40,811 --> 00:17:42,646 Sorry, I wasn't aware. 274 00:17:42,646 --> 00:17:45,691 Which, ipso facto, constitutes a violation. 275 00:17:46,275 --> 00:17:47,943 These are public airwaves, ma'am. 276 00:17:47,943 --> 00:17:51,488 We can't just allow anyone from anywhere to say anything they want. 277 00:17:51,488 --> 00:17:54,074 Well, good thing we're taking our business elsewhere, 278 00:17:54,074 --> 00:17:56,285 and you won't have to worry about our 73s. Right-- 279 00:17:56,285 --> 00:18:02,040 703C's. And yes, my jurisdiction's confined to Vistaville county, but-- 280 00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:04,042 Then write this down in "triclipate." 281 00:18:04,710 --> 00:18:07,421 I've spent 14 hours doing paperwork, my wrists hurt, 282 00:18:07,421 --> 00:18:09,965 my fucking ass is numb, and I've been daydreaming 283 00:18:09,965 --> 00:18:13,051 about stabbing just about anyone in the eye with this pencil. 284 00:18:13,051 --> 00:18:16,972 Then comes you, stuffed in your $12 suit, 285 00:18:16,972 --> 00:18:20,392 asking an honest businesswoman who's buried in forms 286 00:18:20,392 --> 00:18:22,102 for more useless goddamn forms. 287 00:18:22,102 --> 00:18:25,522 Now, please, get the fuck out, and let me do my job. 288 00:18:26,106 --> 00:18:29,234 I'm no stranger to coarse language and contempt. 289 00:18:29,234 --> 00:18:35,115 And while there's no rule against it, it does make the process less pleasant. 290 00:18:36,575 --> 00:18:41,580 Your 16-hour compliance window began with initial "nofitication..." 291 00:18:42,748 --> 00:18:43,749 three minutes ago. 292 00:18:44,333 --> 00:18:45,626 Follow. 293 00:18:47,586 --> 00:18:50,255 So, what else can I say? 294 00:18:50,255 --> 00:18:53,634 I got married at 17. That was my first mistake. 295 00:18:53,634 --> 00:18:57,554 Any man who says, "We'll keep the next baby," is a fucking liar. 296 00:18:57,554 --> 00:19:01,141 My mother's even worse, but we covered her. 297 00:19:03,435 --> 00:19:04,895 Please get me out of here. 298 00:19:06,897 --> 00:19:08,899 Get me out of here. 299 00:19:08,899 --> 00:19:11,068 We were unable to save your message. 300 00:19:13,737 --> 00:19:15,405 For sales, press one. 301 00:19:19,201 --> 00:19:20,619 - Mr. Billings? - Hey. 302 00:19:20,619 --> 00:19:22,454 I saw the garage needed work. 303 00:19:22,454 --> 00:19:24,540 Nothing a couple men with hammers can't handle. 304 00:19:26,875 --> 00:19:27,876 Why you doing this? 305 00:19:27,876 --> 00:19:29,628 Well, because you're stuck, kid. 306 00:19:29,628 --> 00:19:32,214 And every time you see that, it's dragging you down more. 307 00:19:32,214 --> 00:19:35,759 I get you can't come on the road with us, but you can't stay here with that either. 308 00:19:35,759 --> 00:19:37,135 You got some tools in there? 309 00:19:38,887 --> 00:19:39,888 I can check. 310 00:19:52,651 --> 00:19:55,028 My mom just has trouble getting rid of stuff. 311 00:19:56,196 --> 00:19:58,031 Here, you can check in there. 312 00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:02,077 Had a case like this once. 313 00:20:02,661 --> 00:20:04,371 Did you use it a lot as a kid? 314 00:20:05,372 --> 00:20:07,124 No. Mostly just called the handyman. 315 00:20:08,250 --> 00:20:09,251 This will do. 316 00:20:10,460 --> 00:20:12,713 I-- You can throw some paint on the new ones. 317 00:20:14,631 --> 00:20:15,716 Okay. 318 00:20:21,847 --> 00:20:25,017 B-Plex. Please inform Jack I dropped that off. 319 00:20:25,017 --> 00:20:27,811 Nice work, Herb. Tied for second. 320 00:20:27,811 --> 00:20:29,646 Hey, you wanna mark it up yourself? 321 00:20:33,150 --> 00:20:34,484 Who needs a check mark, right? 322 00:20:34,484 --> 00:20:39,656 I know what I did, even if Jack doesn't, nor Joey. 323 00:20:39,656 --> 00:20:41,950 Don't beat yourself up. 324 00:20:41,950 --> 00:20:44,828 Whatever's going on with Jack and that kid's got nothing to do with you. 325 00:20:45,621 --> 00:20:46,705 Thank you, Shirley. 326 00:20:47,206 --> 00:20:50,292 You know, sometimes I think that Betty thinks that if I'm not... 327 00:20:51,919 --> 00:20:54,171 you know, number one, 328 00:20:54,171 --> 00:20:57,799 then there's something wrong. 329 00:20:59,593 --> 00:21:02,679 Well, maybe both of you need to relax a little. 330 00:21:03,180 --> 00:21:07,684 Well, she doesn't really like us using the R-word, Shirley. 331 00:21:17,486 --> 00:21:20,864 Hey, look, you're a good kid, and it's noble that you wanna stick by your mom, 332 00:21:20,864 --> 00:21:23,575 but it's tough living your life for someone else. 333 00:21:23,575 --> 00:21:25,953 Well, that's just how she raised me. 334 00:21:25,953 --> 00:21:27,287 You know, family first. 335 00:21:27,287 --> 00:21:29,498 Exactly, but aren't you a part of that family too? 336 00:21:30,290 --> 00:21:31,458 Sure. 337 00:21:31,458 --> 00:21:35,587 Trust me, the world, it's big enough for you to love her 338 00:21:35,587 --> 00:21:37,381 and do your own thing sometimes. 339 00:21:37,381 --> 00:21:38,966 Looks good, nice, and even. 340 00:21:40,050 --> 00:21:41,051 Thanks. 341 00:21:43,554 --> 00:21:45,430 You know, I've only ever left here once. 342 00:21:46,473 --> 00:21:48,725 No, it was game seven, Volts, Dynamos. 343 00:21:50,185 --> 00:21:52,020 So, it was 10 hours on local buses right there. 344 00:21:52,604 --> 00:21:55,065 You got an adventurer's heart, and you're living like a granny. 345 00:22:01,071 --> 00:22:02,531 How do you know people so good? 346 00:22:03,115 --> 00:22:04,449 Knocking on their doors. 347 00:22:05,534 --> 00:22:06,535 It's a hell of a classroom. 348 00:22:08,203 --> 00:22:10,080 Of course, I wanna go with you guys. 349 00:22:10,831 --> 00:22:13,667 I just don't wanna wind up some nobody. I... 350 00:22:19,673 --> 00:22:22,009 My pops left, and that's what happened to him. 351 00:22:23,927 --> 00:22:25,679 He left her and never looked back. 352 00:22:30,225 --> 00:22:32,936 - You keep in touch with him ever? - I don't even wanna know his name. 353 00:22:32,936 --> 00:22:35,022 - You sure? - I could care less if he was dead. 354 00:22:38,025 --> 00:22:39,985 Well, then, I bet you'll turn out way better than he did. 355 00:22:43,155 --> 00:22:46,700 And that's all your mom really wants, anyway. 356 00:22:46,700 --> 00:22:48,702 I mean, now, I don't know her, but... 357 00:22:50,537 --> 00:22:52,831 moms aren't always built for letting their boys go. 358 00:22:52,831 --> 00:22:56,793 Yeah, she'd probably want me to stay here in this house 359 00:22:56,793 --> 00:22:58,712 with her for the rest of my life if she had her way. 360 00:22:58,712 --> 00:23:00,464 You'd hate her if you never left. 361 00:23:02,841 --> 00:23:04,134 That I know. 362 00:23:04,885 --> 00:23:07,804 Plus, you'd be short a car and a career, and a bunch of new friends, 363 00:23:07,804 --> 00:23:10,641 all of which could be yours for the price of "Thanks, Jack." 364 00:23:18,815 --> 00:23:19,816 Thanks, Jack. 365 00:23:33,413 --> 00:23:34,873 Turndown service. 366 00:23:37,251 --> 00:23:39,461 - You shitty little bastard. - Ma'am-- Miss. 367 00:23:40,045 --> 00:23:42,756 I believed you. I left my whole life for this! 368 00:23:42,756 --> 00:23:44,299 What are you doing here? 369 00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:48,971 - Those are actually my roommate's. - Well, fuck him too! 370 00:23:48,971 --> 00:23:50,681 You promised me this would happen! 371 00:23:51,265 --> 00:23:54,309 I don't have time to wait! My whole life is ruined! 372 00:23:54,309 --> 00:23:57,062 Twelve years of marriage, just fucked! 373 00:23:57,062 --> 00:23:59,857 Excuse me, Miss Tramp, 374 00:23:59,857 --> 00:24:03,360 if you're looking for your cheap scarf, it's right over there. 375 00:24:04,069 --> 00:24:05,153 I knew it. 376 00:24:13,078 --> 00:24:14,079 All right. 377 00:24:14,580 --> 00:24:17,040 Good afternoon, guest. Can I help with your bags? 378 00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:19,126 - You're getting the hang of it. - Sorta. 379 00:24:19,126 --> 00:24:20,919 So, there you are. 380 00:24:21,503 --> 00:24:24,423 Ma, hey. I wasn't expecting you. 381 00:24:25,007 --> 00:24:28,594 This is the-- a new recruit of ours. A great guy. 382 00:24:28,594 --> 00:24:30,429 Joey Shorter, my ma. 383 00:24:30,429 --> 00:24:32,139 It's a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Billings. 384 00:24:33,223 --> 00:24:36,101 God, you're handsome. Excuse me. 385 00:24:37,728 --> 00:24:40,272 All right, no, let him breathe, Ma. Ma, first w-- it's his first week. 386 00:24:41,982 --> 00:24:47,779 I've been telling Jack to recruit someone like you for years now. 387 00:24:47,779 --> 00:24:49,948 Tell me, is he treating you right? 388 00:24:49,948 --> 00:24:53,035 I know firsthand he can be cruel. 389 00:24:53,035 --> 00:24:55,162 Checked out, two-faced, you name it. 390 00:24:55,162 --> 00:24:56,705 Oh, no. 391 00:24:56,705 --> 00:24:58,874 He's been great, really. He's been teaching me a lot. 392 00:24:58,874 --> 00:25:00,751 We're all hitting the road tonight, actually. 393 00:25:00,751 --> 00:25:01,835 Is that right? 394 00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:04,254 On the road? 395 00:25:04,254 --> 00:25:06,757 Lots of packing and planning to do here, Ma. 396 00:25:06,757 --> 00:25:10,010 - But I'm glad you had a chance to meet. - I hope to see you again, Mrs. Billings. 397 00:25:10,010 --> 00:25:11,512 I'm sure you will, Joey. 398 00:25:11,512 --> 00:25:16,266 You're a very special boy. No matter what he says or does. 399 00:25:16,266 --> 00:25:18,936 - Okay. - All right. 400 00:25:18,936 --> 00:25:20,521 Okay. 401 00:25:22,397 --> 00:25:24,441 Good afternoon, valued guest. 402 00:25:24,441 --> 00:25:25,901 Can I help you with transportation? 403 00:25:25,901 --> 00:25:28,612 - I'm coming with, Shirl. - Good for you. 404 00:25:29,655 --> 00:25:30,739 And what's that? 405 00:25:31,740 --> 00:25:33,325 It's a company car. 406 00:25:33,325 --> 00:25:36,662 But, Jack says I can drive it a while. 407 00:25:40,457 --> 00:25:44,127 What sadistic thing are you doing to that boy? 408 00:25:44,127 --> 00:25:46,672 He's fine, Ma. Okay? Just get in the car. 409 00:25:46,672 --> 00:25:49,049 You got to see him. Everything's gonna be fine. 410 00:25:49,049 --> 00:25:54,137 You got him so pumped up full of hot air. He's half nuts already. 411 00:25:54,137 --> 00:25:59,768 Abandoning his mother on her deathbed to "hit the road" 412 00:25:59,768 --> 00:26:02,479 when you can't even cop to being his dad. 413 00:26:02,479 --> 00:26:04,773 I'm gonna tell him soon. What do you think I am? 414 00:26:04,773 --> 00:26:06,316 I know what you are, Jack. 415 00:26:06,316 --> 00:26:09,903 You're the guy who's gonna rip him away from everything decent. 416 00:26:09,903 --> 00:26:14,283 - Straight out of your father's playbook. - Dad didn't run out. He died. 417 00:26:14,283 --> 00:26:16,910 And you think that's not his fault? 418 00:26:17,786 --> 00:26:20,414 I know what it is to live with a lunatic, Jack. 419 00:26:21,456 --> 00:26:23,417 So I'm gonna be looking out for that boy. 420 00:26:24,001 --> 00:26:28,422 Well, I better warn him, 'cause every guy you look out for winds up suicidal. 421 00:26:29,006 --> 00:26:30,716 - Suck it up. - Bye, Ma. 422 00:26:30,716 --> 00:26:34,636 Run away, Jack. Go on, run away. 423 00:26:45,522 --> 00:26:46,607 Shirley. 424 00:26:46,607 --> 00:26:48,442 Hey. Loaded up? 425 00:26:49,943 --> 00:26:53,071 What's better than leaving this town and never coming back, am I right? 426 00:26:53,906 --> 00:26:57,910 You did forget to-- 427 00:26:57,910 --> 00:26:59,912 Well, you forgot to pack this, though. 428 00:27:03,957 --> 00:27:05,167 Let's just see. 429 00:27:09,421 --> 00:27:11,423 What about your other issues? 430 00:27:11,423 --> 00:27:15,761 Jesus. A jewel like that, and you're gonna waste time talking to me about issues? 431 00:27:22,017 --> 00:27:25,312 Ay, ay, ay. It's beautiful, Ed. 432 00:27:27,856 --> 00:27:29,233 It's huge. 433 00:27:31,151 --> 00:27:32,152 Knockout. 434 00:27:35,280 --> 00:27:37,199 - What's wrong with your leg? - Nothing. 435 00:27:37,199 --> 00:27:40,702 - Walk over here then. - No. I'm no trained seal. 436 00:27:40,702 --> 00:27:42,621 I happen to like it over here. 437 00:27:44,331 --> 00:27:46,083 What, you gonna stand over there all night? 438 00:27:46,083 --> 00:27:47,793 Get over here and kiss me. 439 00:27:52,172 --> 00:27:53,674 You miserable fool. 440 00:27:53,674 --> 00:27:57,594 Yeah, maybe, but ain't I lucky, though? 441 00:28:03,308 --> 00:28:04,309 Here. 442 00:28:05,394 --> 00:28:07,521 - What? - Everyone else plays fast and loose. 443 00:28:07,521 --> 00:28:09,064 - Why can't we? - What? 444 00:28:10,607 --> 00:28:13,443 Just take care of what you have to, and pay it back soon. 445 00:28:13,443 --> 00:28:18,282 Shirl, there is an air of miracle and salvation about all this. There is. 446 00:28:18,782 --> 00:28:20,284 - Don't milk it. - Okay, no. 447 00:28:21,201 --> 00:28:24,371 Milk... keeps coming up over and over again. 448 00:28:24,371 --> 00:28:28,000 - No, I'm telling you. - No, enough with the juju talk. 449 00:28:28,000 --> 00:28:29,585 - I-- - Gimme them lips. 450 00:28:39,511 --> 00:28:42,598 So, you're maybe not gonna wanna hear this, but... 451 00:28:44,391 --> 00:28:46,768 Sure, he can stay here 452 00:28:47,269 --> 00:28:50,814 and spend his life getting antsy, wondering what he's capable of, 453 00:28:50,814 --> 00:28:55,694 or he could do what makes him feel like he's got a chance in the world. 454 00:28:56,528 --> 00:28:58,614 And you don't wanna take that away from him. 455 00:29:01,450 --> 00:29:04,369 So what if it screws him up a hundred different ways? 456 00:29:04,369 --> 00:29:06,663 At least he'll come by it honest. 457 00:29:18,634 --> 00:29:20,385 He's incredible. You know that. 458 00:29:24,056 --> 00:29:25,265 You did that. 459 00:29:31,104 --> 00:29:32,689 And, boy, he loves you. 460 00:29:33,732 --> 00:29:36,652 He'd lay down his dreams just to stay by your side. 461 00:29:37,986 --> 00:29:39,571 At least, till I got involved. 462 00:29:44,034 --> 00:29:46,620 God, he knows things at his age I might never learn. 463 00:30:08,684 --> 00:30:09,768 So, fine. 464 00:30:13,522 --> 00:30:15,816 I get it. We'll stay. 465 00:30:17,067 --> 00:30:18,443 What's the big rush, right? 466 00:30:24,283 --> 00:30:26,535 Visiting hours are for family only. 467 00:30:29,162 --> 00:30:30,414 I'm her husband. 468 00:30:34,001 --> 00:30:35,669 How 'bout another round? 469 00:30:38,297 --> 00:30:39,298 Jesus. 470 00:30:40,591 --> 00:30:43,510 Whoever called this a porterhouse should be taken out and shot. 471 00:30:44,928 --> 00:30:45,929 Well, ma'am... 472 00:30:47,848 --> 00:30:52,060 quite often what the menu listed as USDA Prime 473 00:30:52,686 --> 00:30:55,189 is only grade "stadnart--" standard. 474 00:30:55,689 --> 00:30:56,773 That's criminal. 475 00:30:59,234 --> 00:31:01,028 Technically, you're right. 476 00:31:06,867 --> 00:31:07,868 Thank you. 477 00:31:08,452 --> 00:31:11,747 You know, I was on the phone for four hours today, 478 00:31:11,747 --> 00:31:14,875 and no one's listening. Not a soul. I might as well be a goddamn doormat. 479 00:31:16,585 --> 00:31:18,128 Fetch F27EZ. 480 00:31:22,049 --> 00:31:24,510 You're not a doormat, ma'am. You're a customer. 481 00:31:31,475 --> 00:31:33,936 And customers have rights. 482 00:31:35,521 --> 00:31:37,648 And it's my job to protect them.