1
00:00:12,095 --> 00:00:13,847
[store owner] What are you waiting for?
2
00:00:19,228 --> 00:00:20,270
Give it a whirl.
3
00:00:49,216 --> 00:00:51,009
- ♪ Happy Birthday... ♪
- ♪ Happy Birthday... ♪
4
00:00:51,009 --> 00:00:54,054
Hold on a second. Who's--
5
00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:57,057
- ♪ ...Dusty ♪
- ♪ ...Dad ♪
6
00:00:57,057 --> 00:01:03,522
- ♪ Happy Birthday to you ♪
- ♪ Happy Birthday to you ♪
7
00:01:05,232 --> 00:01:06,859
- Aah! I got 'em all.
- Yay!
8
00:01:06,859 --> 00:01:08,402
Aw, what did you wish for?
9
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:10,070
I totally forgot to do it.
10
00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:11,488
- [Cass scoffs]
- You didn't make a wish?
11
00:01:11,488 --> 00:01:13,949
Hey, with a family like this,
what else could I need?
12
00:01:13,949 --> 00:01:15,951
- Aw.
- That's fucking dumb.
13
00:01:15,951 --> 00:01:17,911
So you want me to return
your 40 presents now?
14
00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:20,706
[gasps] I got 40 presents? Get 'em!
15
00:01:20,706 --> 00:01:22,457
Let's move this along.
16
00:01:22,457 --> 00:01:26,211
- [gasps] Oh! Original trail mix.
- Wow.
17
00:01:26,211 --> 00:01:27,254
A new headlamp!
18
00:01:27,254 --> 00:01:28,547
Batteries.
19
00:01:28,547 --> 00:01:30,299
- [gasps] That's better.
- Okay, honey.
20
00:01:30,299 --> 00:01:34,052
[humming] Oh, what's in here?
What are you eating? [chuckles]
21
00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:38,640
Aah. [chuckles] A shirt that's funny
and also makes me feel bad.
22
00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:40,142
I'm really proud of it.
23
00:01:40,142 --> 00:01:41,518
Four dollars...
24
00:01:42,311 --> 00:01:44,104
- stapled together.
- Love you, Dad.
25
00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:47,858
- [vocalizing]
- A scooter! Shut up!
26
00:01:47,858 --> 00:01:51,612
Oh, my God, yeah. That is the perfect gift
for a fully grown adult man!
27
00:01:51,612 --> 00:01:53,780
And look, it even comes with a camo helmet
28
00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:56,241
because you're practically military
now that you drive a scooter.
29
00:01:56,241 --> 00:01:58,493
- Kinda.
- Okay. You can go to school now.
30
00:01:58,493 --> 00:01:59,661
Thank you.
31
00:01:59,661 --> 00:02:01,246
- Thank you.
- Happy birthday.
32
00:02:01,997 --> 00:02:03,248
Thank you, Tri.
33
00:02:03,248 --> 00:02:06,502
- [gasps] Look at this! You are amazing.
- Look at... [laughs] ...You're just so cute.
34
00:02:06,502 --> 00:02:08,711
You're gonna be amazing on it.
I can't wait to see you.
35
00:02:08,711 --> 00:02:10,839
Oh, I'm gonna sit with it. Get used to it.
36
00:02:10,839 --> 00:02:13,091
- Okay. [laughs]
- [Dusty chuckles]
37
00:02:13,091 --> 00:02:14,635
Okay. [clears throat]
38
00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:17,387
This is a surprise! [giggles]
39
00:02:17,387 --> 00:02:18,514
Oh.
40
00:02:19,431 --> 00:02:21,016
- Too much.
- All right.
41
00:02:21,850 --> 00:02:23,185
Ready?
42
00:02:23,727 --> 00:02:24,728
[inhales sharply]
43
00:02:26,605 --> 00:02:29,316
Ooh. Wow. Look at that.
44
00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:32,986
It's-- It's a-- It's a-- a-- a--
45
00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:33,987
It's a theremin.
46
00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:35,113
- A theremin.
- Yeah, yeah.
47
00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:38,367
It's this old-timey musical instrument
that uses electromagnetic waves.
48
00:02:38,367 --> 00:02:39,993
- You don't even have to touch it.
- Oh.
49
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:42,621
- Did I ask for that?
- No.
50
00:02:42,621 --> 00:02:43,747
- No.
- [chuckles]
51
00:02:43,747 --> 00:02:46,542
Just figured you might like it.
You know, because you're so musical.
52
00:02:46,542 --> 00:02:47,793
You're always whistling.
53
00:02:48,293 --> 00:02:49,670
Are you surprised?
54
00:02:49,670 --> 00:02:51,380
[scoffs] You've outdone yourself, darling.
55
00:02:51,380 --> 00:02:53,715
Yay. And you know that's not it, right?
56
00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:56,009
It wouldn't be your birthday
57
00:02:56,510 --> 00:02:59,429
if I didn't have another little surprise
for you when you get home tonight.
58
00:02:59,429 --> 00:03:01,306
- Oh, my goodness.
- Mm-hmm.
59
00:03:01,306 --> 00:03:03,767
Cassandra Hubbard, it's not even Thursday.
60
00:03:03,767 --> 00:03:05,102
Oh, I know.
61
00:03:06,645 --> 00:03:09,481
["Yeah" playing]
62
00:03:44,391 --> 00:03:45,392
[music stops]
63
00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:46,768
[vocalizes]
64
00:03:47,477 --> 00:03:48,478
[exhales sharply]
65
00:03:49,897 --> 00:03:51,481
Whoo... [chuckles] ...Shit.
66
00:03:51,481 --> 00:03:52,900
[music resumes]
67
00:03:55,319 --> 00:03:58,322
[whistling]
68
00:03:59,781 --> 00:04:00,782
[music ends]
69
00:04:00,782 --> 00:04:02,701
Hey! Morning, Izzy.
70
00:04:02,701 --> 00:04:05,495
Ooh, I think you mean,
''Good morning, Mayor Fontaine.''
71
00:04:05,495 --> 00:04:07,706
That is what I meant.
Thank you for correcting me.
72
00:04:08,540 --> 00:04:11,001
Dusty! I see you got a new hog.
73
00:04:11,001 --> 00:04:13,378
- Oh, she's a sweet ride.
- Yeah. [chuckles]
74
00:04:13,378 --> 00:04:15,047
All she needs is a bit of rocket fuel.
75
00:04:15,047 --> 00:04:17,089
- Okay.
- Two milks, one sugar, please.
76
00:04:17,089 --> 00:04:18,800
It's on the house, birthday boy.
77
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:21,094
Oh, my secret's out. [chuckles]
78
00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:22,221
I'm turning 21.
79
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,750
- I see you noticed my new toy.
- [gasps]
80
00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:54,211
Believe it or not,
for the two bucks you saved on coffee,
81
00:04:54,211 --> 00:04:57,089
that thing will tell you
your life's potential.
82
00:04:58,173 --> 00:05:01,134
Is that right? [chuckles]
Where'd you get it?
83
00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:02,261
No idea.
84
00:05:02,261 --> 00:05:05,138
Jacob was manning the store
when it arrived on Friday.
85
00:05:05,138 --> 00:05:07,933
But, um, a lot of people used it
over the weekend,
86
00:05:07,933 --> 00:05:12,938
and, uh, it seems to be good for business,
so I'm not asking questions.
87
00:05:14,898 --> 00:05:16,525
What do you think, Mr. Malik?
88
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:18,360
Best two bucks you ever spent?
89
00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:24,783
[Dusty clears throat]
90
00:05:47,556 --> 00:05:49,433
Jimbo!
91
00:05:50,225 --> 00:05:54,104
Morning, Larry. Morning, Lisa!
92
00:05:54,605 --> 00:05:55,814
[whistles]
93
00:05:57,524 --> 00:06:00,527
Hey, Jamie! Hey, Jamie C!
94
00:06:00,527 --> 00:06:03,780
Hi, Jasmine. Ooh, new hair, I like it.
95
00:06:04,656 --> 00:06:05,657
[grunts]
96
00:06:07,201 --> 00:06:08,327
Hi.
97
00:06:09,828 --> 00:06:11,121
Hi. How you doing?
98
00:06:12,122 --> 00:06:13,457
Hiya. [grunts]
99
00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:16,960
- Hey, Josh.
- Hey, nice scooter, birthday boy!
100
00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:18,504
Thank you. You can borrow it!
101
00:06:18,504 --> 00:06:20,589
- I'ma hold you to that.
- Maybe.
102
00:06:22,132 --> 00:06:24,760
- Hey, what's happening?
- Mr. Hubbard! Ay, check it out.
103
00:06:24,760 --> 00:06:28,889
{\an8}Guess who's gonna be
your next great "Meteorologist."
104
00:06:28,889 --> 00:06:31,391
{\an8}Aah, I see someone's been
to Mr. Johnson's.
105
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:33,268
What-- Axel, is that your life potential?
106
00:06:33,268 --> 00:06:35,938
That's right. And according to the MORPHO,
107
00:06:35,938 --> 00:06:38,649
I'm gonna be building
your rocket ships one day.
108
00:06:38,649 --> 00:06:41,151
That's not even close
to what a meteorologist is.
109
00:06:41,151 --> 00:06:43,487
He probably just made the card himself.
110
00:06:43,487 --> 00:06:44,821
- Aha! Boom.
- W-Wha-- No!
111
00:06:44,821 --> 00:06:46,698
[Dusty]
You see, who needs a silly machine?
112
00:06:46,698 --> 00:06:49,493
Savannah just proved her potential
as a criminal prosecutor.
113
00:06:49,493 --> 00:06:53,330
No, no, no. Jacob! Jacob was there.
He saw me do it.
114
00:06:53,330 --> 00:06:56,708
Jake. Jake, come on. Back-- Back me up.
115
00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:01,338
I think it's bullshit.
116
00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:03,423
- All right.
- [school bell rings]
117
00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:07,386
Well, let's check our language
and open our textbooks.
118
00:07:08,178 --> 00:07:10,722
I believe we were discussing the wives
of Henry VIII.
119
00:07:12,182 --> 00:07:14,893
Let's try and get through them
a little quicker than he did.
120
00:07:16,186 --> 00:07:18,397
He got through them pretty quick.
Doesn't make sense.
121
00:07:26,113 --> 00:07:27,114
[Dusty] I like it. No.
122
00:07:27,114 --> 00:07:29,992
So, if-- If you wanna know
if it's gonna rain tomorrow,
123
00:07:29,992 --> 00:07:32,870
all you gotta do is call up
my worst student, Axel. [chuckles]
124
00:07:32,870 --> 00:07:34,580
[Cass chuckles] Maybe I will, okay?
125
00:07:34,580 --> 00:07:36,164
I mean, who knows?
126
00:07:36,164 --> 00:07:39,334
Maybe this will inspire Axel to actually...
127
00:07:39,334 --> 00:07:41,295
What? To become a meteorologist?
128
00:07:41,295 --> 00:07:44,256
Or just believe in himself.
129
00:07:44,256 --> 00:07:46,758
You know, Nat,
she got ''Storyteller'' on her card
130
00:07:46,758 --> 00:07:49,595
and said it felt like someone
reached into her soul
131
00:07:50,095 --> 00:07:53,015
and articulated her secret dream.
132
00:07:53,015 --> 00:07:54,933
I don't think you're allowed
to call it a secret dream
133
00:07:54,933 --> 00:07:56,852
if you constantly tell people
you're a storyteller.
134
00:07:56,852 --> 00:07:59,104
- [giggles]
- The woman just likes to gossip.
135
00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:02,399
Okay, yes,
but how does the machine know that?
136
00:08:02,399 --> 00:08:03,734
Well, it's clearly a scam.
137
00:08:03,734 --> 00:08:06,528
You're only hearing about it
from people who got a good life potential.
138
00:08:06,528 --> 00:08:08,238
- Ah.
- Nobody's gonna tell you if they got
139
00:08:09,573 --> 00:08:11,825
"Third Best Garbageperson in Deerfield."
140
00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:14,703
Oh. That's what you got, isn't it?
141
00:08:14,703 --> 00:08:16,079
What about you?
142
00:08:16,079 --> 00:08:18,081
What do you think
your life potential would be?
143
00:08:19,249 --> 00:08:22,544
[staff members] ♪ Happy, happy celebration
It's your special day ♪
144
00:08:22,544 --> 00:08:26,757
♪ We're so glad you came
And brought your family today ♪
145
00:08:26,757 --> 00:08:33,722
♪ At Giorgio's Italian Restaurant
And sports center ♪
146
00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:38,059
♪ You'll always be
In the happiest mood ♪
147
00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:43,857
♪ 'Cause we bring endless fun
And endless foods ♪
148
00:08:44,608 --> 00:08:45,817
- [Cass] Yay!
- [Dusty] Mmm.
149
00:08:45,817 --> 00:08:47,736
Oh, that was really nice.
That was really ni--
150
00:08:47,736 --> 00:08:50,531
It just-- It didn't feel
like the entire staff was singing.
151
00:08:50,531 --> 00:08:53,200
I understand that, yeah.
It feels like this little section here.
152
00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:55,953
- This section avoiding eye contact.
- So quiet.
153
00:08:55,953 --> 00:08:57,204
Why did you have to come here?
154
00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:58,747
Oh, we came for the ''endless fun
155
00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:00,916
- and the endless foods.''
- Endless foods.
156
00:09:03,377 --> 00:09:05,212
All right. Back to work, people.
157
00:09:05,212 --> 00:09:07,756
Oh, she doesn't know
that we're her parents.
158
00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:10,801
Oh, you don't recognize
it's your mum and your dad.
159
00:09:10,801 --> 00:09:12,177
[Cass] From your house!
160
00:09:12,177 --> 00:09:15,222
- [Dusty] We made you!
- Yeah! Trina!
161
00:09:15,222 --> 00:09:16,306
We love you!
162
00:09:16,306 --> 00:09:18,892
- Hey, hey, hey. What can I say?
- Hey!
163
00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:20,686
It's hard to find good help these days.
164
00:09:20,686 --> 00:09:22,521
Must be something in her genes,
165
00:09:22,521 --> 00:09:26,650
and I know it's not coming from Cass,
so I'm looking over here! [laughs]
166
00:09:26,650 --> 00:09:28,443
[chuckles] Okay, Giorgio.
167
00:09:28,443 --> 00:09:30,153
I'm just kidding. I'm kidding.
168
00:09:30,153 --> 00:09:32,698
We're having fun.
We're having a little bit of fun.
169
00:09:33,198 --> 00:09:35,033
Kid's got potential.
170
00:09:35,033 --> 00:09:38,120
Speaking of,
you two tried this MORPHO machine?
171
00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:40,664
- Oh, my God.
- Oh, we were just talking about that.
172
00:09:40,664 --> 00:09:42,291
You wanna know what I got?
173
00:09:42,291 --> 00:09:43,375
''Superstar.''
174
00:09:44,168 --> 00:09:46,420
- [Cass] Oh.
- Is that spooky or what?
175
00:09:46,420 --> 00:09:48,505
- I was legitimately spooked.
- [chuckles] Mmm.
176
00:09:48,505 --> 00:09:50,340
- Mmm. That's spooky as shit.
- That is scary.
177
00:09:50,340 --> 00:09:51,717
I don't know if you two remember,
178
00:09:51,717 --> 00:09:54,052
but I was the first
Italian-American goalie
179
00:09:54,052 --> 00:09:55,637
in New York Rangers history.
180
00:09:55,637 --> 00:09:56,805
And the youngest.
181
00:09:56,805 --> 00:09:59,349
- How would we not remember that?
- It's printed on the menu.
182
00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:01,935
I was brimming with potential
183
00:10:01,935 --> 00:10:04,980
until I suffered a permanent injury
to my catching hand
184
00:10:04,980 --> 00:10:08,817
- while I was dead-lifting over 465 pounds.
- Yeah, yeah, we know the story.
185
00:10:08,817 --> 00:10:11,528
- How much were you lifting though?
- But if it wasn't for that, I guess,
186
00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:13,447
- I wouldn't have this place...
- Hey.
187
00:10:13,447 --> 00:10:15,991
...which is also a lifelong dream.
188
00:10:15,991 --> 00:10:19,203
Yeah, so, I guess,
as that spooky machine can attest,
189
00:10:19,203 --> 00:10:22,331
''Superstar'' can mean a lot
of different things, Big D.
190
00:10:22,331 --> 00:10:24,708
- [chuckles]
- [laughs] Dusty won't try it.
191
00:10:24,708 --> 00:10:25,834
Really?
192
00:10:26,418 --> 00:10:28,212
What? Why not, bro?
193
00:10:28,212 --> 00:10:30,297
You don't have something
you always wanted to be?
194
00:10:30,297 --> 00:10:32,966
Some secret ambition or talent?
195
00:10:32,966 --> 00:10:35,219
Ooh. Dusty is a really good whistler.
196
00:10:35,802 --> 00:10:38,263
Among other secret talents.
197
00:10:38,263 --> 00:10:40,766
A good whistler. Wow.
198
00:10:40,766 --> 00:10:43,894
Cass is a lucky woman.
199
00:10:43,894 --> 00:10:49,483
And you, my friend, are a very lucky man.
I've been saying this since high school.
200
00:10:49,483 --> 00:10:51,151
To end up with this one?
201
00:10:52,277 --> 00:10:55,948
Maybe that's your life potential,
''World's Luckiest Man.''
202
00:10:56,573 --> 00:10:58,408
- What do you think?
- Uh. Yeah. [chuckles]
203
00:10:58,408 --> 00:11:00,369
I think I have everything I ever wanted.
204
00:11:00,369 --> 00:11:02,079
Maybe you didn't want enough.
205
00:11:08,794 --> 00:11:10,337
Enjoy your night, you two.
206
00:11:10,337 --> 00:11:13,715
- Hey, play some of the games, okay?
- [Cass] Mm-hmm.
207
00:11:13,715 --> 00:11:16,385
- Get it now, babe. Whoo!
- Yeah, yeah. Every time.
208
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:21,265
- Shit! Watch out.
- Oh!
209
00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:24,768
- I think it's the form. You hot?
- [pants] I need to let loose here.
210
00:11:24,768 --> 00:11:27,479
- Yeah, it's too restrictive.
- Yeah, yeah. Let loose, babe.
211
00:11:28,897 --> 00:11:30,357
- Oh!
- Oh, babe!
212
00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:32,734
- No, I'm all right. [groans]
- Aw. Zero points.
213
00:11:36,363 --> 00:11:37,781
[groans]
214
00:11:38,282 --> 00:11:39,491
- [grunts] Fuck.
- [customer] Ooh!
215
00:11:39,491 --> 00:11:41,952
[pants]
216
00:11:44,538 --> 00:11:46,623
- Is that-- Is this all you got?
- [sighing] Yes.
217
00:11:46,623 --> 00:11:49,668
Yeah. I think there might have
been something wrong with your machines.
218
00:11:49,668 --> 00:11:51,795
- It's broken. It was broken.
- Definitely.
219
00:11:51,795 --> 00:11:54,131
Congratulations. You won a pencil.
220
00:11:54,131 --> 00:11:55,966
- [sighing] Thank you.
- [chuckles]
221
00:11:55,966 --> 00:11:57,551
I feel really special.
222
00:11:59,178 --> 00:12:02,472
- [moaning]
- [kissing, breathing heavily]
223
00:12:06,894 --> 00:12:08,937
You know, maybe I've got
more than one hidden talent.
224
00:12:08,937 --> 00:12:10,647
- [chuckles]
- You ever thought about that?
225
00:12:10,647 --> 00:12:12,900
[moans] A couple times,
I've thought about it.
226
00:12:12,900 --> 00:12:15,277
- Mmm.
- [chuckles] What about me?
227
00:12:15,277 --> 00:12:18,614
Oh, you? You were amazing.
228
00:12:18,614 --> 00:12:20,991
[chuckles] Best you've ever had?
229
00:12:22,117 --> 00:12:24,870
You're the only one I've ever had.
So, yes.
230
00:12:27,748 --> 00:12:30,709
[Dusty whistling]
231
00:12:32,044 --> 00:12:33,295
Dusty?
232
00:12:34,671 --> 00:12:36,381
You think you can fuck me again?
233
00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:37,758
[whistling stops]
234
00:12:39,218 --> 00:12:40,260
What was that?
235
00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:45,098
You think you can fuck me again?
236
00:12:46,183 --> 00:12:47,267
Definitely I can.
237
00:12:47,851 --> 00:12:49,520
- Yeah? Hmm.
- Yeah.
238
00:12:49,520 --> 00:12:53,357
You-- You want me to... [stammers]
...You mean like before, but just again?
239
00:12:54,024 --> 00:12:56,443
- Yeah. [chuckles]
- Oh.
240
00:12:56,443 --> 00:12:58,445
- That's new. [chuckles]
- Uh-huh.
241
00:12:58,445 --> 00:12:59,738
You mean, like, right now?
242
00:12:59,738 --> 00:13:01,281
I mean, if you can.
243
00:13:01,281 --> 00:13:02,574
I definitely can, yeah.
244
00:13:02,574 --> 00:13:04,576
- Yeah?
- Yeah. I can get that done for you, baby.
245
00:13:04,576 --> 00:13:07,246
- Okay. I got you.
- Yeah. Yeah.
246
00:13:07,871 --> 00:13:09,790
- Just relax, baby.
- Mmm.
247
00:13:10,499 --> 00:13:12,960
- [kissing] Mm-hmm.
- [moans]
248
00:13:17,673 --> 00:13:19,424
Mmm.
249
00:13:19,424 --> 00:13:22,135
You know what, I actually don't know
if I can right this minute.
250
00:13:23,095 --> 00:13:24,972
- Oh. Okay.
- I'm sorry. It's just--
251
00:13:24,972 --> 00:13:27,307
- I had that second piña colada.
- It's okay.
252
00:13:27,307 --> 00:13:29,935
And part of me
thought it might have been a nightcap.
253
00:13:29,935 --> 00:13:32,229
It's okay. I was just kidding. [chuckles]
254
00:13:32,729 --> 00:13:35,315
- [sighs]
- Yeah, 'cause we just did it.
255
00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:37,401
[Cass whistling]
256
00:13:39,611 --> 00:13:40,654
Cass?
257
00:13:41,697 --> 00:13:42,990
You can whistle?
258
00:13:42,990 --> 00:13:45,576
[sighs, scoffs] Yeah.
259
00:13:47,536 --> 00:13:49,538
[whistling continues]
260
00:14:03,093 --> 00:14:04,178
[sighs]
261
00:14:14,479 --> 00:14:15,480
What the fuck?
262
00:14:25,532 --> 00:14:26,658
Who you texting?
263
00:14:26,658 --> 00:14:28,452
Oh. No, I wasn't-- I wasn't.
264
00:14:28,452 --> 00:14:30,454
I was just, uh, waiting for breakfast.
265
00:14:31,455 --> 00:14:32,539
Hmm.
266
00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,750
[Cass] Sorry. No more pancakes.
267
00:14:34,750 --> 00:14:36,293
Your special day is over.
268
00:14:48,430 --> 00:14:51,558
[Principal Pat laughing]
It's not like I'ma join a biker gang,
269
00:14:51,558 --> 00:14:53,435
you know? But let me tell you something.
270
00:14:53,435 --> 00:14:56,522
Ever since I was a little girl,
I always wanted to ride.
271
00:14:56,522 --> 00:14:58,190
So if nothing else,
272
00:14:58,190 --> 00:15:03,529
maybe this machine is letting me know
that maybe I wasn't so crazy. [laughs]
273
00:15:03,529 --> 00:15:05,489
Or maybe I am! [chuckles]
274
00:15:05,489 --> 00:15:09,409
I just blew my whole retirement fund
on a brand new Harley. [laughing]
275
00:15:10,035 --> 00:15:12,162
Look at Father Reuben,
276
00:15:12,162 --> 00:15:15,874
he's like, "Principal Pat,
you're a crazy motherfucker!" [laughs]
277
00:15:16,375 --> 00:15:17,876
Is that what you're thinking, Father?
278
00:15:17,876 --> 00:15:19,837
All right, look. I think it's natural
279
00:15:19,837 --> 00:15:23,006
to, uh, wanna believe in something
that might be too good to be true.
280
00:15:23,006 --> 00:15:27,636
Uh, like, when Dawn Caswell said
she saw the face of God in her hydrangeas.
281
00:15:27,636 --> 00:15:30,013
But, like I said to Dawn,
282
00:15:30,764 --> 00:15:32,391
what were you looking for?
283
00:15:46,071 --> 00:15:47,656
Oh. Don't worry. [strains]
284
00:15:47,656 --> 00:15:50,409
I was third on my team
in rebounds, so... [blows]
285
00:16:06,300 --> 00:16:08,635
[narrator in documentary]
A crowd of onlookers gathers
286
00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:13,265
to watch the Queen Mary
named at the commission of George V
287
00:16:13,265 --> 00:16:16,310
after the kingdom's greatest... [indistinct]
288
00:16:16,894 --> 00:16:18,312
At Westminster Abbey,
289
00:16:18,312 --> 00:16:21,607
an even larger crowd
witnesses the coronation
290
00:16:21,607 --> 00:16:24,735
of George VI and his wife Elizabeth,
291
00:16:24,735 --> 00:16:29,990
as king and queen of the United Kingdom
and the Dominions of British Commonwealth
292
00:16:29,990 --> 00:16:32,701
and as emperor and empress of India...
293
00:16:32,701 --> 00:16:34,494
- [students laughing]
- Shh.
294
00:16:34,494 --> 00:16:36,455
[narrator in documentary]
...ascended the throne
295
00:16:36,455 --> 00:16:40,083
upon the abdication of his brother, Edward.
296
00:16:41,293 --> 00:16:43,378
Jacob! J-Pop! Wait up.
297
00:16:43,378 --> 00:16:45,714
[grunting] Hey.
298
00:16:45,714 --> 00:16:48,634
- Mr. Hubbard. Um. How was your birthday?
- [pants]
299
00:16:48,634 --> 00:16:52,930
Oh, yeah. It was, uh,
it was pretty shakin'. Shakin' jams.
300
00:16:54,264 --> 00:16:55,682
I don't think that's an expression.
301
00:16:55,682 --> 00:16:59,520
Anyway, I just wanted to say, um,
we've got a lecture coming up on Henry I,
302
00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:04,775
and if you wanted to, you know,
sit it out, that's totally fine.
303
00:17:04,775 --> 00:17:07,819
You... [stammers] ...It--
It involves brother-on-brother violence.
304
00:17:07,819 --> 00:17:11,198
So, I was just a bit concerned
it might be triggering for you.
305
00:17:11,198 --> 00:17:15,077
Well, I don't think it will be, you know,
since I didn't kill my brother.
306
00:17:15,077 --> 00:17:17,037
And he also wasn't a king, so...
307
00:17:17,954 --> 00:17:19,790
Good points. Well-spotted.
308
00:17:19,790 --> 00:17:21,625
And also, I wanted to say that, um,
309
00:17:21,625 --> 00:17:24,377
even though people aren't talking
about what happened to Kolton,
310
00:17:24,377 --> 00:17:26,505
it doesn't mean that everyone's forgotten.
311
00:17:26,505 --> 00:17:27,881
Hope you know that.
312
00:17:27,881 --> 00:17:29,716
I can't imagine what you're going through
313
00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:33,470
and juggling all of that
and coming back to school
314
00:17:33,470 --> 00:17:36,515
and your job at Johnson's.
315
00:17:37,724 --> 00:17:39,017
Yeah.
316
00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:40,853
That must've been weird,
317
00:17:41,353 --> 00:17:43,605
when you were working your shift
the other day
318
00:17:43,605 --> 00:17:45,941
and this frigging MORPHO machine turns up.
319
00:17:45,941 --> 00:17:49,027
- I don't wanna talk about the MORPHO.
- No, me neither. No, me neither.
320
00:17:49,027 --> 00:17:52,197
Don't-- Everybody's like,
''Oh, where did it come from?''
321
00:17:52,698 --> 00:17:53,740
"Who cares!"
322
00:17:53,740 --> 00:17:55,617
Not me. I couldn't give two hoots.
323
00:17:55,617 --> 00:17:56,994
I couldn't give one hoot.
324
00:17:57,995 --> 00:17:59,788
I'm surprised Mr. Johnson
doesn't care, though.
325
00:17:59,788 --> 00:18:01,665
If I'm honest, it feels strange.
326
00:18:01,665 --> 00:18:04,793
I feel like if five pinball machines
turned up in his store,
327
00:18:05,711 --> 00:18:08,505
- he'd wanna know where they came from.
- I don't know, Mr. Hubbard, you know.
328
00:18:08,505 --> 00:18:10,424
No, nobody seems to know.
329
00:18:11,758 --> 00:18:14,928
- I should really get back to class. So...
- Yeah. No, same. Totally.
330
00:18:14,928 --> 00:18:17,556
Hey, how did you know it was my b-day,
by the way?
331
00:18:17,556 --> 00:18:18,640
Uh, Trina told me.
332
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:21,518
Oh, are you two in classes together
this semester?
333
00:18:22,144 --> 00:18:26,690
Well, I mean,
she dropped most of her classes, so... no.
334
00:18:27,691 --> 00:18:29,401
That's right.
She dropped most of her classes.
335
00:18:33,739 --> 00:18:35,532
I think we need to talk about Trina.
336
00:18:35,532 --> 00:18:38,035
Are you aware that she's been
dropping most of her classes?
337
00:18:38,619 --> 00:18:40,829
- That's not ideal, is it?
- Dusty, come on.
338
00:18:42,122 --> 00:18:43,415
She's been through a lot.
339
00:18:43,415 --> 00:18:46,210
I know. I know that. I just-- [stammers]
340
00:18:46,210 --> 00:18:49,087
I don't want her taking advantage
of the situation, or whatever.
341
00:18:49,671 --> 00:18:50,964
- Taking advantage?
- Well, yeah,
342
00:18:50,964 --> 00:18:54,384
if it's gonna affect her down the line.
This is a really important year for her.
343
00:18:54,384 --> 00:18:55,886
Okay, uh--
344
00:18:55,886 --> 00:18:58,472
You don't want her to take advantage
of the fact her boyfriend died?
345
00:18:58,472 --> 00:19:00,057
Is that what you think she's doing?
346
00:19:00,057 --> 00:19:02,518
No. I don't know what she's doing.
347
00:19:02,518 --> 00:19:04,937
I mean,
she used to share everything with us.
348
00:19:04,937 --> 00:19:06,980
And now I feel like
I don't know anything anymore.
349
00:19:07,564 --> 00:19:10,484
Well, what's wrong with that?
350
00:19:10,484 --> 00:19:14,947
I mean, maybe you don't need to know
everything that's going on with everyone.
351
00:19:14,947 --> 00:19:19,326
You know, maybe people want
some things that are, like, just for them.
352
00:19:21,328 --> 00:19:23,539
That's a weird and upsetting thing to say.
You all right?
353
00:19:24,248 --> 00:19:25,290
- Yeah.
- Okay.
354
00:19:26,542 --> 00:19:27,709
'Cause you seem a little off.
355
00:19:27,709 --> 00:19:30,671
- Off? [scoffs] I seem off?
- Not "off" off, just--
356
00:19:30,671 --> 00:19:34,007
- What is that? [chuckles]
- Not off. Not off, just, uh, not on.
357
00:19:34,007 --> 00:19:35,133
Oh.
358
00:19:37,469 --> 00:19:39,304
- Is it about this machine?
- No.
359
00:19:40,430 --> 00:19:41,431
Did you use it?
360
00:19:42,391 --> 00:19:43,433
No.
361
00:19:44,101 --> 00:19:46,603
- Are you unhappy?
- What does that even mean?
362
00:19:48,730 --> 00:19:51,066
Are you unhappy in this life?
363
00:19:57,614 --> 00:20:00,325
Can you, um, put your stuff away, please?
364
00:20:00,325 --> 00:20:04,037
I wanna use my heat-press.
And I just, like, need space. [chuckles]
365
00:20:06,164 --> 00:20:07,207
Okay.
366
00:20:09,293 --> 00:20:10,335
[chuckles]
367
00:20:31,398 --> 00:20:34,693
- [switch clicks]
- [whirring]
368
00:20:38,405 --> 00:20:40,824
[Theremin buzzes, crackles]
369
00:20:41,575 --> 00:20:44,369
[electronic humming]
370
00:20:58,175 --> 00:21:01,094
[hi-pitched wavering tone]
371
00:21:01,094 --> 00:21:05,766
[pitch rises, falls]
372
00:21:14,441 --> 00:21:17,861
[Dusty] The study of history
is the study of change.
373
00:21:20,239 --> 00:21:23,325
We investigate not only what happened,
but when it happened,
374
00:21:23,325 --> 00:21:25,953
where it happened, and why it happened.
375
00:21:27,371 --> 00:21:30,249
Castles are built, battles are fought...
376
00:21:31,375 --> 00:21:33,418
governments and laws are overturned.
377
00:21:33,418 --> 00:21:35,379
But nothing happens overnight.
378
00:21:40,467 --> 00:21:42,553
Tensions simmer and boil.
379
00:21:43,053 --> 00:21:46,765
Conflicts ebb and flow,
the tide is gradually turned.
380
00:21:52,688 --> 00:21:55,899
And what might have seemed
like a sudden, and shocking change,
381
00:21:57,651 --> 00:21:59,069
through the lens of history...
382
00:22:02,656 --> 00:22:04,283
seems all but inevitable.
383
00:22:08,620 --> 00:22:12,624
[laughs] You're late for class! [laughs]
384
00:22:16,628 --> 00:22:18,714
[chattering]
385
00:22:27,431 --> 00:22:29,057
[alarm blaring]
386
00:22:29,641 --> 00:22:30,976
Hey, hey.
387
00:22:32,436 --> 00:22:34,646
- [breathes heavily]
- What are you doing?
388
00:22:34,646 --> 00:22:38,025
Dude, why don't you just open it up,
so we can see how you did it?
389
00:22:38,025 --> 00:22:41,403
You think I could make this thing?
I can barely use my phone.
390
00:22:41,403 --> 00:22:44,198
Nobody touches it, okay?
391
00:22:46,408 --> 00:22:47,451
You want a refund?
392
00:22:51,288 --> 00:22:52,331
Here's your refund.
393
00:23:06,178 --> 00:23:07,346
[arson kid] How did you do that?
394
00:23:08,805 --> 00:23:12,184
I have been saving
my childhood magic books my whole life.
395
00:23:13,477 --> 00:23:15,354
Until I used this machine...
396
00:23:18,148 --> 00:23:19,942
...I never knew why.
397
00:23:19,942 --> 00:23:21,610
[customers chattering]
398
00:23:22,110 --> 00:23:23,320
Now, who wants to go next?
399
00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:25,405
[clamoring]
400
00:23:28,283 --> 00:23:29,868
[Dusty] No one who changed history
401
00:23:29,868 --> 00:23:32,913
needed a little blue envelope
to tell them what to do.
402
00:23:32,913 --> 00:23:36,708
They made mission statements,
and they believed in themselves.
403
00:23:36,708 --> 00:23:40,504
They worked hard in the steady pursuit
of their goals, and they took control.
404
00:23:40,504 --> 00:23:41,880
They didn't throw everything away
405
00:23:41,880 --> 00:23:45,300
and just put all of their faith
in some random outside force.
406
00:23:45,300 --> 00:23:46,760
[Axel] Excuse me, Mr. Hubbard.
407
00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:50,013
[stammers] I don't mean to interrupt,
but where you going with this?
408
00:23:50,013 --> 00:23:53,392
Yeah, it's kinda weird that you've, like,
written this down.
409
00:23:53,392 --> 00:23:55,978
[giggles] It's called a lecture.
410
00:23:55,978 --> 00:23:58,564
I, um-- I'm gonna tell you
where I'm going with this.
411
00:23:58,564 --> 00:24:00,107
I want everybody to pull out paper.
412
00:24:00,107 --> 00:24:01,942
Can you do that for me?
413
00:24:01,942 --> 00:24:04,111
We're gonna, uh, write two things on it.
414
00:24:04,111 --> 00:24:08,031
On one side, I want you to write, "I am,"
415
00:24:08,657 --> 00:24:13,954
and on the other, "I will be."
416
00:24:16,999 --> 00:24:19,751
You're going to decide
your own life potential, folks.
417
00:24:21,170 --> 00:24:23,755
What are you now? What are you gonna be?
418
00:24:25,299 --> 00:24:27,801
Well, what about you, Mr. Hubbard?
What are you gonna be?
419
00:24:42,691 --> 00:24:43,901
Dusty Hubbard.
420
00:24:43,901 --> 00:24:47,070
It's been a while since I've seen you
in here. What can I get ya?
421
00:24:48,238 --> 00:24:50,240
Uh, something hard. [sighs]
422
00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:51,325
No, a beer.
423
00:24:51,909 --> 00:24:54,828
- All right.
- [whistles]
424
00:24:57,039 --> 00:24:58,540
Hey, Father.
425
00:24:59,166 --> 00:25:00,959
What are you doing?
Confessions over there?
426
00:25:00,959 --> 00:25:03,879
- Ah. [chuckles]
- [laughing]
427
00:25:05,672 --> 00:25:07,633
Bottoms up to ya.
428
00:25:10,886 --> 00:25:14,139
- Mmm. That's good.
- [chuckles]
429
00:25:15,307 --> 00:25:16,475
What percent is that?
430
00:25:17,142 --> 00:25:18,435
- Of alcohol?
- Mm-hmm.
431
00:25:18,435 --> 00:25:20,437
- It's probably a 4.5.
- Mmm.
432
00:25:20,437 --> 00:25:22,356
It's good. It's hoppy.
433
00:25:23,232 --> 00:25:24,233
It shouldn't be.
434
00:25:25,651 --> 00:25:26,693
Oh.
435
00:25:29,738 --> 00:25:30,739
Hang on.
436
00:25:30,739 --> 00:25:35,911
Uh, Father, I do, actually, have a little
bit of a confession, if you don't mind?
437
00:25:37,412 --> 00:25:40,123
- You can come... [chuckles] ...No.
- [sighs] I'm just sorry. I'm sorry.
438
00:25:40,123 --> 00:25:43,085
I'm-I'm sure you don't wanna talk shop.
439
00:25:43,710 --> 00:25:48,549
I have a student
who has started developing some--
440
00:25:49,424 --> 00:25:54,847
some weird blue marks on his, um... rectum?
441
00:25:56,139 --> 00:25:59,101
- On his rectum?
- I don't know the medical term.
442
00:26:00,269 --> 00:26:01,854
Anus-cheek. Whatever.
443
00:26:01,854 --> 00:26:05,023
- Mmm.
- Anyway, I wondered what you might advise?
444
00:26:05,816 --> 00:26:07,442
Well, first I would advise your student
445
00:26:07,442 --> 00:26:10,487
not to show his ass or his rectum
to his teachers.
446
00:26:10,487 --> 00:26:11,947
He didn't show me his ass.
447
00:26:12,865 --> 00:26:14,491
He just described it for me.
448
00:26:15,492 --> 00:26:16,994
No, that's not--
449
00:26:16,994 --> 00:26:20,664
I'm gonna be honest with you, Father.
It's my own ass that I'm talking about.
450
00:26:21,707 --> 00:26:23,041
- Mmm.
- So...
451
00:26:23,041 --> 00:26:26,128
Well, in that case, I would advise you
to see a doctor.
452
00:26:26,128 --> 00:26:28,130
[chuckles] Well, no, I would, of course,
453
00:26:28,130 --> 00:26:30,716
except, the only doctor in Deerfield
happens to be my mother.
454
00:26:31,341 --> 00:26:35,804
I don't know if I'm in the right place to
reintroduce my mother to my bare bottom.
455
00:26:35,804 --> 00:26:36,972
- [chuckles]
- Hey.
456
00:26:37,472 --> 00:26:39,892
Sorry, just gotta clear plates here.
457
00:26:40,726 --> 00:26:41,852
Get this out of the way.
458
00:26:42,728 --> 00:26:45,480
- Thank you, Hana.
- Yummy beer. Mmm.
459
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:48,692
You know, Dusty,
I'm-I'm kinda off the clock right now,
460
00:26:48,692 --> 00:26:51,069
so if it's a medical concern, you s--
461
00:26:51,069 --> 00:26:52,654
- It's not just a medical concern.
- Mmm.
462
00:26:52,654 --> 00:26:56,783
[sighs] It's about this stupid machine
at Johnson's store.
463
00:26:56,783 --> 00:27:00,078
I'm sorry. I don't know why
it's bothering me so much.
464
00:27:00,078 --> 00:27:02,956
It's not like I really believe
there's a magical machine
465
00:27:02,956 --> 00:27:05,501
that can tell people
what they're capable of.
466
00:27:05,501 --> 00:27:09,046
But, come on, I mean, literally,
everyone is trying it.
467
00:27:09,046 --> 00:27:11,965
- Um, not everyone is trying it.
- Well, okay, not everyone is trying it.
468
00:27:11,965 --> 00:27:14,259
But you know what I mean.
Everyone who is trying it
469
00:27:14,259 --> 00:27:18,263
seems to be making some pretty drastic
life changes because of it.
470
00:27:18,263 --> 00:27:19,890
- It's weird. [chuckles]
- Mmm.
471
00:27:20,474 --> 00:27:23,268
I just feel like
I've already done my big life change.
472
00:27:24,311 --> 00:27:26,021
When my mother brought us from Ireland,
473
00:27:26,021 --> 00:27:27,606
it took a bit of getting used to,
474
00:27:27,606 --> 00:27:30,859
but I got used to it,
and now I just want to enjoy it. [laughs]
475
00:27:30,859 --> 00:27:32,653
This was it. This was--
476
00:27:33,737 --> 00:27:36,615
This was the next chapter
in my life story.
477
00:27:38,492 --> 00:27:40,869
So, you think a book
only has two chapters?
478
00:27:40,869 --> 00:27:45,290
- Uh, no, no. Not good books, anyway.
- [chuckles]
479
00:27:46,291 --> 00:27:47,876
- [groans]
- [stammers, sighs]
480
00:27:49,002 --> 00:27:50,420
But what happens next, then?
481
00:27:52,089 --> 00:27:54,842
- I'm 40 years old.
- Mmm.
482
00:27:54,842 --> 00:27:57,970
Weird shit has started appearing
on my body.
483
00:27:58,470 --> 00:28:00,347
I could just drop dead at any minute.
484
00:28:00,848 --> 00:28:03,684
I have no discernible talents,
other than whistling.
485
00:28:04,184 --> 00:28:06,228
And I've only ever been
in one relationship.
486
00:28:07,229 --> 00:28:08,605
Mmm. Yeah, me too.
487
00:28:09,815 --> 00:28:14,027
- Uh, with God. [chuckles]
- Ah. Right.
488
00:28:15,988 --> 00:28:18,740
You know what Kierkegaard says
about anxiety, Dusty?
489
00:28:19,867 --> 00:28:22,744
Yeah, yeah.
But I'd-I'd love to hear your take on it.
490
00:28:23,245 --> 00:28:26,331
He says that anxiety came
before original sin.
491
00:28:27,916 --> 00:28:32,129
When God told Adam not to eat the apple,
Adam felt anxiety,
492
00:28:32,921 --> 00:28:36,550
because he realized, for the first time,
there was another option.
493
00:28:36,550 --> 00:28:39,052
He realized he had a choice.
494
00:28:41,221 --> 00:28:42,431
And this machine--
495
00:28:43,849 --> 00:28:46,059
I mean, whether it's magic or not,
496
00:28:46,059 --> 00:28:50,564
is reminding people that our lives
have more than one possible path.
497
00:28:51,523 --> 00:28:53,108
Which is scary. [chuckles]
498
00:28:53,108 --> 00:28:57,196
The same way as it's scary
to walk to the edge of a cliff.
499
00:28:58,697 --> 00:29:01,867
Because you already know
that you could stay exactly where you are,
500
00:29:01,867 --> 00:29:03,035
or you could...
501
00:29:04,536 --> 00:29:09,333
throw yourself off into the deep unknown.
502
00:29:12,878 --> 00:29:16,798
And you know it's up to you.
503
00:29:24,848 --> 00:29:27,267
- Good old Kierkegaard.
- [chuckles]
504
00:29:27,267 --> 00:29:29,311
["She's a Mystery to Me" playing]
505
00:30:40,215 --> 00:30:41,717
What are you waiting for?
506
00:30:47,264 --> 00:30:48,307
Give it a whirl.
507
00:31:05,032 --> 00:31:09,077
[machine chirps, whirs, beeps]
508
00:31:09,745 --> 00:31:12,080
[breathes deeply]
509
00:31:23,091 --> 00:31:24,218
[sighs]
510
00:31:51,954 --> 00:31:53,121
[inhales sharply]
511
00:31:53,789 --> 00:31:56,375
[machine beeps]
512
00:32:06,885 --> 00:32:08,554
[sighs]
513
00:32:38,709 --> 00:32:39,751
Is it good?
514
00:32:42,296 --> 00:32:43,297
Are you happy?
515
00:32:47,092 --> 00:32:48,552
Fuck it!
516
00:32:52,347 --> 00:32:53,557
I mean, fuck it.
517
00:33:04,151 --> 00:33:05,194
Dusty?
518
00:33:06,737 --> 00:33:10,866
Are you okay?
519
00:33:10,866 --> 00:33:11,992
I will be.
520
00:33:30,802 --> 00:33:31,929
[sighs]
521
00:33:36,600 --> 00:33:38,393
["Gold" playing]