1 00:00:15,766 --> 00:00:17,643 [grunts, shouts] 2 00:00:17,643 --> 00:00:19,853 [breathing heavily] 3 00:00:19,853 --> 00:00:21,188 I can't let you smash it. 4 00:00:21,188 --> 00:00:22,731 Who says I was gonna smash it? 5 00:00:23,941 --> 00:00:27,069 You are not in my mind. You don't know what I was gonna do. 6 00:00:27,694 --> 00:00:30,030 And I could ask you, what are you doing in the store 7 00:00:30,030 --> 00:00:32,698 - in the middle of the night? - Okay, okay. I was working. 8 00:00:32,698 --> 00:00:35,369 And then I didn't wanna go home, so I was just hanging out. 9 00:00:35,369 --> 00:00:37,079 I decided to try the machine one more time, 10 00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:39,206 but I accidentally put in the wrong numbers for my Social 11 00:00:39,206 --> 00:00:41,625 and I got the same thing, the same card again. 12 00:00:41,625 --> 00:00:43,710 So I put in the wrong numbers again, different numbers, 13 00:00:43,710 --> 00:00:47,589 and I didn't put my fingerprints on it. I put on my arm and my elbow and my face. 14 00:00:47,589 --> 00:00:50,133 And no matter what I did, every time I got the same thing, 15 00:00:50,133 --> 00:00:53,178 which means it isn't even using the things people think it's using. 16 00:00:53,178 --> 00:00:57,474 Which means this whole thing is more, I don't wanna say magical, but, like-- 17 00:00:57,474 --> 00:00:58,725 Are you high right now? 18 00:00:58,725 --> 00:01:02,062 - Of course. Of course I am. - [sighs] 19 00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:05,022 But that doesn't mean it's not true. You can see for yourself. 20 00:01:09,152 --> 00:01:10,988 [machine beeping] 21 00:01:15,492 --> 00:01:16,827 [sighs] 22 00:01:19,288 --> 00:01:20,289 [groans] 23 00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:37,973 - Is that what you got before? - [sighs] It's what I am. 24 00:01:38,557 --> 00:01:41,894 I thought you got "Dancer." [chuckles] You're a-- You're a ghost? 25 00:01:41,894 --> 00:01:43,478 I might as well be. 26 00:01:44,021 --> 00:01:46,398 I'm practically invisible in this town these days. 27 00:01:46,398 --> 00:01:48,817 - And you are pretty scary. - [scoffs] 28 00:01:50,903 --> 00:01:53,322 Well, if you wanna trade, I'd actually love to be invisible. 29 00:01:53,322 --> 00:01:56,241 - Well, you're invisible to me, dear. - Oh, thanks. High praise. 30 00:01:56,241 --> 00:01:59,119 I mean I won't tell Mr. Johnson you were here. 31 00:02:02,456 --> 00:02:03,457 Thanks. 32 00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:07,544 And I won't tell him you were gonna smash the machine, 33 00:02:08,169 --> 00:02:10,964 especially now that we know about the fingerprints and Socials. 34 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,049 Oh, forget all that. 35 00:02:12,049 --> 00:02:14,384 People who believe will continue to believe, 36 00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:17,471 and the people who don't will just take this as proof it's a scam. 37 00:02:18,138 --> 00:02:19,765 You start telling people that machine doesn't work 38 00:02:19,765 --> 00:02:20,891 the way they think it does, 39 00:02:22,059 --> 00:02:25,896 it's only gonna create more of a divide and put you at the center of it. 40 00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:30,317 Now, what if Mr. Johnson asks about that broken glass? 41 00:02:31,109 --> 00:02:33,487 {\an8}I'll tell him a-- a ghost did it. 42 00:02:34,530 --> 00:02:38,534 {\an8}Seriously, you say anything, and I will beat your ass. 43 00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:42,829 [sighs] 44 00:03:17,406 --> 00:03:18,657 [entrance bell rings] 45 00:03:20,325 --> 00:03:21,702 Good afternoon. 46 00:03:21,702 --> 00:03:23,370 Hope I'm not interrupting anything. 47 00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:26,206 I just took a quick break from all of my gallivanting 48 00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:28,250 so that I could come and tell you to go to hell. 49 00:03:28,250 --> 00:03:30,419 - Yeah. You've been talking to Trina... - Hmm. 50 00:03:30,419 --> 00:03:35,966 ...telling her that I've been canoodling with bachelors and playing princess, 51 00:03:35,966 --> 00:03:39,261 as if last night and everything that I've been working so hard towards 52 00:03:39,261 --> 00:03:42,514 has something to do with me. Trying to-- to get attention or something. 53 00:03:43,849 --> 00:03:46,226 [Cass] Uh... [stammers] ...okay. 54 00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:48,729 - But I did not ask for that, okay? - [scoffs] 55 00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:52,566 I do not want that because I am not you. So you can think what you want, 56 00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:55,360 but I'm not gonna let you lie about me to my daughter 57 00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:59,281 the same way that you have lied about Martha to me. 58 00:04:00,157 --> 00:04:02,910 Yes. Did you really think that we would never talk? 59 00:04:02,910 --> 00:04:05,704 You told me that Martha didn't wanna have kids. 60 00:04:05,704 --> 00:04:08,582 You told me that Martha did not want to have me. 61 00:04:08,582 --> 00:04:12,753 You had me feeling, this entire time, like this has all been my fault. 62 00:04:12,753 --> 00:04:14,046 Have you had lunch? 63 00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:17,673 I'm sorry, what? What? 64 00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:21,845 - Please don't change the subject. - I'm not. 65 00:04:23,013 --> 00:04:25,224 I'd like to take you to lunch so we can talk. 66 00:04:26,308 --> 00:04:27,351 Properly. 67 00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:34,191 Yeah. [stammering] Yeah, yeah. Treat me to lunch. 68 00:04:38,487 --> 00:04:41,657 Um... [chuckles] ...you do realize that I made this, right? 69 00:04:42,241 --> 00:04:44,201 I'd rather have an antler shoved up my ass 70 00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:47,496 than to pick another deer made out of sticks. 71 00:04:49,248 --> 00:04:53,377 [theremin whistling sharply] 72 00:04:53,377 --> 00:04:54,461 [footsteps approaching] 73 00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:56,463 - Dad? - Oh, no, no. Trina, Trina. [shushes] 74 00:04:56,463 --> 00:05:00,217 Hold on. I am taking my whistler potential to a whole new level. 75 00:05:00,217 --> 00:05:01,969 [breathes deeply] 76 00:05:01,969 --> 00:05:05,556 [theremin whistling "Yeah!"] 77 00:05:06,181 --> 00:05:07,182 [Dusty whistles] 78 00:05:09,893 --> 00:05:10,894 [Dusty whistles] 79 00:05:10,894 --> 00:05:12,271 [theremin stops whistling] 80 00:05:13,230 --> 00:05:15,065 - I think Mom's having an affair. - What? 81 00:05:15,065 --> 00:05:17,526 I caught Mom and Giorgio together on the gondola last night, 82 00:05:17,526 --> 00:05:19,903 holding hands and looking shady as fuck. 83 00:05:19,903 --> 00:05:21,613 [laughs] That's-- 84 00:05:22,114 --> 00:05:24,783 Trina, I've seen Giorgio take your mom's hands... 85 00:05:24,783 --> 00:05:26,577 - [scoffs] - ...and kiss them in front of me. 86 00:05:26,577 --> 00:05:28,912 - It's nothing new. - And you're-- you're okay with that? 87 00:05:28,912 --> 00:05:31,498 I'm not okay with it. Of course I'm not okay with it. 88 00:05:31,498 --> 00:05:33,667 So then what are you gonna do about it? Huh? 89 00:05:34,251 --> 00:05:36,712 - Well-- I'm-- - I smashed that fucker's sign, 90 00:05:36,712 --> 00:05:38,463 and he didn't even do anything to me. 91 00:05:40,174 --> 00:05:42,301 [scoffs] Well, maybe I'll-- 92 00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:46,096 maybe I'll smash in something more than a sign. 93 00:05:46,096 --> 00:05:47,055 - Yeah. - Yeah? 94 00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:50,475 - Yeah! - Maybe I'll smash in his fucking face. 95 00:05:50,475 --> 00:05:53,562 - Yeah! - Or maybe he has another sign I can smash. 96 00:05:54,146 --> 00:05:57,566 Either way, I'm not gonna stay down here and take his shit anymore. 97 00:05:57,566 --> 00:06:00,027 - No. - You think I'm gonna take his shit? 98 00:06:00,027 --> 00:06:01,361 It does seem like you're here 99 00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:03,030 - playing the fucking theremin. - Not anymore-- 100 00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:04,364 - [theremin whistling] - No, you're not! 101 00:06:04,364 --> 00:06:05,699 I'm not gonna take it. No. 102 00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:07,743 'Cause your dad doesn't take anybody's shit! [groans] 103 00:06:07,743 --> 00:06:10,537 - Can you just turn that thing off? - It's tricky! [groans] 104 00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:11,622 You render it useless... 105 00:06:11,622 --> 00:06:13,874 - when you take it off a flat surface. - [whistling stops] 106 00:06:20,172 --> 00:06:21,423 [car alarm beeps] 107 00:06:27,095 --> 00:06:29,014 [engine starts] 108 00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:30,098 [vehicle departs] 109 00:06:33,018 --> 00:06:34,311 [car alarm beeps] 110 00:06:44,655 --> 00:06:46,615 Come out here, Giorgio! We have man business. 111 00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:49,117 I'm coming in! 112 00:06:52,454 --> 00:06:54,081 Giorgio, show yourself! 113 00:06:56,500 --> 00:06:58,544 Good. Hey! 114 00:07:01,713 --> 00:07:03,966 Are you ready for your comeuppance, you slick prick? 115 00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:15,644 [whispers] Giorgio, where are you? 116 00:07:20,607 --> 00:07:23,277 [inhales sharply] W-Welcome to Giorgio's. [groans] 117 00:07:23,277 --> 00:07:24,486 Giorgio. 118 00:07:25,612 --> 00:07:26,738 D? 119 00:07:26,738 --> 00:07:30,200 [sniffs] I never wanted you to see me like this, D. 120 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:35,581 I never wanted you to look at me with anything less than unadulterated awe. 121 00:07:35,581 --> 00:07:36,707 Unadultera-- 122 00:07:37,583 --> 00:07:40,544 - You're the adulterator, you dipshit. - It's true. 123 00:07:41,378 --> 00:07:42,963 I made a move on your girl, D. 124 00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:47,551 But she rejected me, and I get it, you know? I do. 125 00:07:48,302 --> 00:07:50,929 Why pay for a slice of Giorgio pepperoni 126 00:07:50,929 --> 00:07:53,974 when you've got the world's greatest pie at home? 127 00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:56,143 More like a hearty Irish stew, but yeah. 128 00:07:56,143 --> 00:07:59,438 Anyway, it's all good. I'm just gonna be alone forever... 129 00:07:59,438 --> 00:08:01,481 [breathing shakily] ...and that's A-okay with-- 130 00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:04,610 [sobbing] 131 00:08:05,319 --> 00:08:07,821 [sighs] No. No, no, no. 132 00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:10,407 No, don't say that. 133 00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:13,994 [sobs] I'm just too much of an idiota to find love. 134 00:08:14,786 --> 00:08:17,247 Even the idiotas deserve love. 135 00:08:17,247 --> 00:08:20,584 No. No, I'm just a big, bald, stupid little baby. 136 00:08:21,793 --> 00:08:24,922 Giorgio, y-you have many attractive qualities. 137 00:08:24,922 --> 00:08:27,799 - Name five. - [whispering] Five? Holy shit. 138 00:08:27,799 --> 00:08:29,384 Yeah, five. 139 00:08:29,384 --> 00:08:33,179 You have a lovely big house. 140 00:08:34,056 --> 00:08:38,684 Okay, but that's not about me though. Make it about me specifically. 141 00:08:38,684 --> 00:08:43,982 Mmm, you've got such robust chest hair. 142 00:08:43,982 --> 00:08:45,859 Hmm. Thank you. 143 00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:47,653 You've got great taste in women. 144 00:08:47,653 --> 00:08:49,655 - Hmm? Obviously. - [chuckles] 145 00:08:49,655 --> 00:08:51,490 And what a lovely skull you have. 146 00:08:51,490 --> 00:08:52,741 Gotta count for something. 147 00:08:53,575 --> 00:08:54,576 Two more. 148 00:08:54,576 --> 00:08:56,954 - [whispering] Two fucking more. Wow. - [sighs] 149 00:08:56,954 --> 00:08:58,705 - That's a lot more, isn't it? - You see? 150 00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:02,209 You see, D? You can't even think of five things that easily, man. 151 00:09:02,209 --> 00:09:06,129 I-- I got nothing to be proud of, D. I'm a fraud. 152 00:09:06,129 --> 00:09:09,341 I sold all my stuff, all my cool sports stuff, 153 00:09:09,341 --> 00:09:12,302 including my Rangers goalie mask. And why? 154 00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:16,139 Why? To impress an outstanding woman? 155 00:09:16,139 --> 00:09:18,350 Like, do you have any idea how this feels? 156 00:09:18,851 --> 00:09:20,978 To do everything that you can for a person, 157 00:09:20,978 --> 00:09:24,356 and yet she still doesn't love you the way that you wanna be loved? 158 00:09:25,315 --> 00:09:28,360 [breathes deeply, clicks tongue] 159 00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:32,614 Giorgio, I don't know how to help you with that... [sighs] 160 00:09:34,575 --> 00:09:36,577 ...but I could help you get your mask back. 161 00:09:38,287 --> 00:09:41,957 Oh, maro. You're such a good friend, D. 162 00:09:41,957 --> 00:09:44,168 Oh, that's all right. 163 00:09:44,168 --> 00:09:47,921 Let's get your hair on, shall we? That would cheer you up, wouldn't it? 164 00:09:48,422 --> 00:09:50,299 - [breathes deeply] - Yeah. 165 00:09:50,299 --> 00:09:51,592 Head down. 166 00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:57,264 - And pop it on. Pop it on. Mmm. - Oh, that's nice. 167 00:09:59,892 --> 00:10:02,686 - Pretty boy. - [clicking tongue] 168 00:10:05,939 --> 00:10:08,192 Do you remember the first time we came in here together? 169 00:10:08,192 --> 00:10:09,610 Sadly, I do not. 170 00:10:09,610 --> 00:10:11,236 Now, you were about ten or 11. 171 00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:15,741 And that was all offices, and this was Shanghai House. 172 00:10:15,741 --> 00:10:18,911 And there was a koi pond here, where the canal is. 173 00:10:19,411 --> 00:10:22,873 - Remember? After the tornado? - I don't remember a tornado. 174 00:10:22,873 --> 00:10:24,833 There was no tornado. 175 00:10:24,833 --> 00:10:27,127 Everyone panicked, boarded up their windows, 176 00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:32,174 cleaned Johnson's out of supplies, and it missed us by about 50 miles. 177 00:10:33,717 --> 00:10:36,136 You were so disappointed. [chuckles] 178 00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:38,597 Standing out there on the lawn, staring up at the sky, 179 00:10:38,597 --> 00:10:43,644 waiting for something exciting to happen, and all you got was a drizzle. 180 00:10:44,686 --> 00:10:49,900 So, I brought you here for some chicken balls and MSG. 181 00:10:49,900 --> 00:10:53,403 You said you wanted to talk, so does this story have a point maybe? 182 00:10:53,403 --> 00:10:57,241 My point is you were bored living here. 183 00:10:58,367 --> 00:11:00,661 You've always been bored and wanting more. 184 00:11:01,495 --> 00:11:03,664 When we lived in New York and I was dancing, 185 00:11:03,664 --> 00:11:05,457 Martha couldn't understand that. 186 00:11:05,457 --> 00:11:07,709 She wanted a quiet life. 187 00:11:08,418 --> 00:11:11,380 She wanted to move here, live closer to her family. 188 00:11:12,589 --> 00:11:14,675 And I didn't want to lose her, so we did. 189 00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:19,680 I gave up my career because that's what you do 190 00:11:19,680 --> 00:11:20,848 when you love somebody. 191 00:11:21,515 --> 00:11:24,309 You bury parts of yourself to keep them happy. 192 00:11:25,602 --> 00:11:28,438 But I was damn fucking bored, Cass. 193 00:11:29,982 --> 00:11:33,110 So I ran for office, and Martha didn't like that either. 194 00:11:33,110 --> 00:11:36,321 And I'm not blaming her, but I needed that. 195 00:11:37,739 --> 00:11:39,491 I needed something for myself. 196 00:11:40,075 --> 00:11:41,159 Okay. 197 00:11:41,660 --> 00:11:44,246 But you lied to me. Yes. 198 00:11:44,246 --> 00:11:48,208 You told me that you and Martha broke up because she didn't want kids. 199 00:11:48,208 --> 00:11:49,751 She didn't want kids, 200 00:11:49,751 --> 00:11:52,671 which is why you may have noticed she doesn't have any kids. 201 00:11:53,255 --> 00:11:54,256 But I did. 202 00:11:55,799 --> 00:12:01,763 I wanted you, which is why I chose to have you at 17 years old. 203 00:12:02,723 --> 00:12:04,474 With no help from your dad, 204 00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:07,102 or from my parents who kicked me out of the house 205 00:12:07,102 --> 00:12:08,687 and made me raise you on my own, 206 00:12:08,687 --> 00:12:12,149 which I was damn well happy to do because I was a very good mother. 207 00:12:12,149 --> 00:12:14,985 - And sweet fucking hell! - [rock music playing] 208 00:12:14,985 --> 00:12:17,362 Can't you see we're having a conversation here? 209 00:12:17,362 --> 00:12:20,616 If you don't shut that thing up, I will dance all over your face. 210 00:12:20,616 --> 00:12:23,118 [video game beeps] 211 00:12:23,827 --> 00:12:25,871 Uh, nice, Mom. 212 00:12:26,455 --> 00:12:30,792 I don't expect you to take my side. You think I'm the enemy. It's fine. 213 00:12:33,128 --> 00:12:36,215 I just wish it didn't always have to be a competition between us. 214 00:12:39,468 --> 00:12:42,221 [breathes deeply] So do I. [sighs] 215 00:12:45,265 --> 00:12:46,975 - [Izzy chuckles] - Mm-hmm. 216 00:12:46,975 --> 00:12:52,856 [breathes deeply] That being said though, I bet I kick your ass on that there game. 217 00:12:56,944 --> 00:12:58,612 - I'm actually surprised... - [car alarm beeps] 218 00:12:58,612 --> 00:13:01,156 ...these people would spend money on a goalie mask. 219 00:13:01,156 --> 00:13:03,367 There's a lot they could've been doing to their property. 220 00:13:03,367 --> 00:13:07,246 {\an8}I mean, like, not to judge, but come on. The lawn edging? 221 00:13:07,829 --> 00:13:10,874 - If they're so good at math-- - Hey, Giorgio, you think you have it bad? 222 00:13:10,874 --> 00:13:11,792 Check it out. 223 00:13:11,792 --> 00:13:15,587 Whoa, "Sole Survivor." What kind of potential is that? 224 00:13:15,587 --> 00:13:18,090 - It's the worst kind of potential. - What the f-- 225 00:13:18,090 --> 00:13:21,301 Hey there, friend. You the mathematician? 226 00:13:21,885 --> 00:13:24,513 Nah, man. I'm Urie, the sole survivor. 227 00:13:25,180 --> 00:13:28,350 But I don't know what I'm gonna survive, so I've been living in the garden shed 228 00:13:28,350 --> 00:13:29,476 to protect my family. 229 00:13:29,476 --> 00:13:31,520 - What a lovely idea. - Smart. 230 00:13:31,520 --> 00:13:35,440 - You guys wanna have tea with me? - What a delightful offer, Urie. 231 00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:38,318 I'll give you the mask back for free, if you come inside and have tea with me. 232 00:13:40,070 --> 00:13:41,655 It's really Giorgio's mask, 233 00:13:41,655 --> 00:13:44,491 - and it looks like a two-person shed. - Let's have some tea, D. 234 00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:46,827 - [groaning] Fuck a duck. - Let's go, D. 235 00:13:46,827 --> 00:13:48,787 - What kinda tea you got in there, Urie? - Chamomile. 236 00:13:48,787 --> 00:13:50,581 Chamomile. Hell, yeah. 237 00:13:50,581 --> 00:13:53,125 - Chamomile, love it. - [Dusty groans] Now it's a party. 238 00:13:53,125 --> 00:13:54,209 [Giorgio] Yeah. 239 00:13:54,710 --> 00:13:57,171 [pop music playing] 240 00:14:00,674 --> 00:14:02,718 - [whooping] - [chuckling] 241 00:14:04,845 --> 00:14:05,846 [Cass shrieks] 242 00:14:09,183 --> 00:14:10,350 [Izzy coughs, groans] 243 00:14:10,976 --> 00:14:13,395 [Cass cheers] Yes! 244 00:14:13,395 --> 00:14:16,815 - [vocalizing] In your face. - Wow. [chuckles] 245 00:14:16,815 --> 00:14:19,026 I'm sorry, who was the professional dancer? 246 00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:21,778 Oh, that's right. Hi, I'm the professional dancer. 247 00:14:21,778 --> 00:14:23,780 - Yep, yep. [shrieks, chuckles] - Okay, ma'am. 248 00:14:23,780 --> 00:14:25,490 - Yeah, you're causing a scene. - Yes. 249 00:14:25,490 --> 00:14:27,534 - [Cass] Oh, come on! - [Trina] You good? 250 00:14:27,534 --> 00:14:29,411 Your Grizzy is faking an injury. 251 00:14:29,411 --> 00:14:30,954 I am not faking. 252 00:14:30,954 --> 00:14:35,209 And it's not 'cause of that stupid thing. It's 'cause of Pat and Farid's wedding. 253 00:14:35,751 --> 00:14:38,837 Okay, so why didn't you just say something? 254 00:14:38,837 --> 00:14:40,130 Why try to play this game-- 255 00:14:40,130 --> 00:14:42,508 I didn't get Dancer for my potential, girls. 256 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:47,387 And it won't be long before people wanna see my card. 257 00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:49,306 That's all people care about now. 258 00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:51,683 And once they realize I've been lying... 259 00:14:53,602 --> 00:14:55,187 they'll never vote for me again. 260 00:14:55,896 --> 00:14:57,523 - What are you talking about? - [sighs] 261 00:14:58,232 --> 00:14:59,399 [inhales sharply] 262 00:15:12,579 --> 00:15:15,374 Does Jacob have any more of those blank cards? 263 00:15:22,881 --> 00:15:25,217 Just so you know, this isn't exactly halfway between 264 00:15:25,217 --> 00:15:27,010 our houses as the crow flies. 265 00:15:27,010 --> 00:15:30,013 "As the crow flies"? You're such a freaking dork. 266 00:15:30,013 --> 00:15:32,224 I'm doing you the favor. I feel like you should be coming to me. 267 00:15:32,224 --> 00:15:34,643 - I'm not allowed in your house. - Yeah, how convenient. 268 00:15:38,772 --> 00:15:39,982 Here. 269 00:15:46,530 --> 00:15:48,490 - Thanks for doing this. - No worries. 270 00:15:51,076 --> 00:15:52,119 [Jacob] Oh... [chuckles] 271 00:15:52,119 --> 00:15:55,581 ...of course, yes, um-- this concludes our transaction, 272 00:15:55,581 --> 00:15:58,333 so I guess I'll be on my way. 273 00:15:59,001 --> 00:16:00,294 Me too, as well. 274 00:16:04,715 --> 00:16:07,801 Or we could just stand here forever in this random spot. 275 00:16:07,801 --> 00:16:10,220 It's not random. It's equidistant between our houses, so... 276 00:16:10,220 --> 00:16:13,223 Mmm. It actually isn't. [chuckles] 277 00:16:14,224 --> 00:16:16,226 But I am very happy to be here with you. 278 00:16:17,728 --> 00:16:19,438 Because you know what's not working? 279 00:16:20,022 --> 00:16:21,398 Not being together. 280 00:16:22,858 --> 00:16:25,277 No, that's not working at all. 281 00:16:25,277 --> 00:16:28,655 That is definitely not making anything better. [chuckles] 282 00:16:29,323 --> 00:16:32,034 - [both chuckles] - I just like you so much still. 283 00:16:36,705 --> 00:16:38,415 - Yeah. [laughs] - Yeah. [chuckles] 284 00:16:38,415 --> 00:16:39,791 [Trina chuckles] Yeah. 285 00:16:39,791 --> 00:16:42,586 [Urie] My biggest nightmare is losing someone I love. 286 00:16:42,586 --> 00:16:44,963 I don't want my wife around me, if something bad's gonna happen. 287 00:16:44,963 --> 00:16:47,424 Okay, but this is no way to live, Urie. 288 00:16:47,424 --> 00:16:51,595 I mean, your wife is stuck in the house doing fractions by herself. 289 00:16:51,595 --> 00:16:52,763 It doesn't add up. 290 00:16:52,763 --> 00:16:54,014 Think about it logically. 291 00:16:54,640 --> 00:16:58,769 If a meteor was to hit your house, if you're really a sole survivor, 292 00:16:58,769 --> 00:17:04,233 then you'd be fine out here in your shed, but your wife would be-- [inhales deeply] 293 00:17:04,233 --> 00:17:06,527 She would be smashed by a space rock. 294 00:17:06,527 --> 00:17:07,528 [snaps fingers] 295 00:17:07,528 --> 00:17:11,281 I understand that with this, but not with this. 296 00:17:11,281 --> 00:17:13,492 Every time I step outside, I feel like I'm gonna vomit. 297 00:17:13,492 --> 00:17:16,203 Aw, man, I know. 298 00:17:16,203 --> 00:17:19,790 I would throw up before big games when I was playing for the Rangers 299 00:17:19,790 --> 00:17:21,916 in that very helmet right there. 300 00:17:21,916 --> 00:17:26,839 I put so much pressure on myself because I was living in fear too. 301 00:17:26,839 --> 00:17:30,217 I felt like-- I felt like I had to be this hockey superstar 302 00:17:30,217 --> 00:17:32,928 just because I had so much God-given talent, you know? 303 00:17:32,928 --> 00:17:34,888 But the truth is, Urie-- the truth is, 304 00:17:34,888 --> 00:17:36,932 now I know I should have just followed my heart. 305 00:17:36,932 --> 00:17:40,477 Flown to Italy, so it could be me with Cass, instead of D. 306 00:17:40,477 --> 00:17:43,564 But I want you to know, you would have been my best man. 307 00:17:43,564 --> 00:17:45,482 What? Okay. Let-- [stammers] 308 00:17:45,482 --> 00:17:50,737 I wasn't even in Italy with Cass. I was-- I was working at a ski resort. 309 00:17:50,737 --> 00:17:53,699 - Really? I didn't know that, D. - Mm-hmm. 310 00:17:53,699 --> 00:17:54,908 Yeah, that was-- 311 00:17:55,492 --> 00:17:58,120 Wow, that was actually the last time that Cass and I were apart. 312 00:17:58,871 --> 00:18:01,373 That was, like, 20 years ago, Big D. 313 00:18:01,373 --> 00:18:03,542 You haven't been on your own in 20 years? 314 00:18:04,418 --> 00:18:08,755 I mean, I'm-- [stammering] I can do some things alone. 315 00:18:10,632 --> 00:18:12,426 I go to the movies on my own. 316 00:18:12,426 --> 00:18:14,970 Why? Why do you go to the movies on your own? 317 00:18:14,970 --> 00:18:16,847 I guess, in a way, I am... 318 00:18:19,099 --> 00:18:20,434 a bit afraid too. 319 00:18:22,269 --> 00:18:25,105 Afraid of finding out what would happen if I didn't have Cass. 320 00:18:26,565 --> 00:18:31,028 I spend so much time thinking about what she wants from me, 321 00:18:31,028 --> 00:18:33,447 I don't even know what I want from myself. 322 00:18:33,447 --> 00:18:35,949 It's like we're all trying to control these things 323 00:18:35,949 --> 00:18:37,618 that can't be controlled, right? 324 00:18:37,618 --> 00:18:41,121 Instead of embracing the uncertainty. 325 00:18:41,121 --> 00:18:45,042 Yeah. I mean, look at us, a bunch of best friend scaredy-cats, 326 00:18:45,542 --> 00:18:46,668 sitting here sipping tea. 327 00:18:46,668 --> 00:18:48,003 - What are we doing? - [chuckling] 328 00:18:48,003 --> 00:18:50,214 I'm gonna start going back outside, living my life. 329 00:18:50,214 --> 00:18:52,382 - Yeah! - Proud of you, bro. 330 00:18:53,050 --> 00:18:54,343 You guys wanna hang out tonight? 331 00:18:55,385 --> 00:18:57,930 - I would love to... - Me too. 332 00:18:57,930 --> 00:18:59,723 ...but I have... [clears throat] 333 00:18:59,723 --> 00:19:04,686 [stammers] ...previously committed to going to a m-magic show. 334 00:19:04,686 --> 00:19:05,854 That sounds fake. 335 00:19:05,854 --> 00:19:09,942 It does. But, no. The magic is real. 336 00:19:09,942 --> 00:19:12,528 [theater goers chattering] 337 00:19:17,574 --> 00:19:18,951 - Wow. [scoffs] - I know. 338 00:19:18,951 --> 00:19:21,328 I'm surprised I found a parking spot. 339 00:19:21,328 --> 00:19:24,998 This is incredible, Izzy. I can't believe how many people showed. 340 00:19:24,998 --> 00:19:28,043 Well, like I told them, if you turn out to be a real magician, 341 00:19:28,043 --> 00:19:30,629 maybe they'll turn out to be whatever it says on their cards. 342 00:19:30,629 --> 00:19:32,172 - No pressure. - [laughing] 343 00:19:33,549 --> 00:19:34,925 - [Izzy laughs] - [Mr. Johnson laughs] 344 00:19:36,510 --> 00:19:37,719 - Okay, so. - Mmm. 345 00:19:37,719 --> 00:19:39,721 Speaking of cards... [exhales deeply] 346 00:19:40,597 --> 00:19:43,475 - don't say I never do anything for you. - [gasps] Mmm. 347 00:19:45,060 --> 00:19:46,937 - But you can say, "thank you." - [chuckles] 348 00:19:46,937 --> 00:19:50,232 Or even "thanks." Or "Hey, Cass, you're so kind." 349 00:19:50,232 --> 00:19:53,735 You think you're so kind? Watch this. 350 00:19:54,444 --> 00:19:56,989 Martha! Over here. [chuckles] 351 00:19:56,989 --> 00:20:00,909 - Is it true? Do you really have it? - Mmm. I really have it, Martha. 352 00:20:02,119 --> 00:20:05,205 - One permit for one moat. - [chuckles] Finally. 353 00:20:05,205 --> 00:20:06,999 Oh, Rose is gonna be very happy, 354 00:20:06,999 --> 00:20:09,209 especially since she's digging as we speak. 355 00:20:09,209 --> 00:20:10,294 [scoffs] 356 00:20:12,588 --> 00:20:18,719 The word "magic" first appeared in the late 14th century 357 00:20:18,719 --> 00:20:23,390 to describe the art of influencing or predicting events, 358 00:20:23,390 --> 00:20:27,895 and producing marvels using hidden natural forces. 359 00:20:27,895 --> 00:20:32,524 Tonight you will witness the marvels 360 00:20:32,524 --> 00:20:36,945 of The Great Morphini! 361 00:20:38,906 --> 00:20:40,908 [audience gasping, exclaiming] 362 00:20:51,376 --> 00:20:53,754 Oh, yeah, I fucking love magic. Let's go. 363 00:20:53,754 --> 00:20:55,464 [drumroll playing] 364 00:21:00,552 --> 00:21:01,595 [drumroll stops] 365 00:21:02,763 --> 00:21:05,891 - That is not my card. - [audience laughs] 366 00:21:05,891 --> 00:21:08,810 Well, Father, are you sure you know what your card is? 367 00:21:08,810 --> 00:21:11,313 - [audience laughing] - Hmm. 368 00:21:13,524 --> 00:21:16,318 - [Mr. Johnson] Pick a card, sir. - Uh... 369 00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:20,906 [Mr. Johnson] Memorize it, then replace it in the deck. 370 00:21:20,906 --> 00:21:21,823 [Cass chuckles] 371 00:21:23,742 --> 00:21:26,119 I want you to close your eyes 372 00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:29,623 - and relax to the sound of the metronome. - [breathes deeply] 373 00:21:29,623 --> 00:21:30,958 [Dusty chuckles] 374 00:21:30,958 --> 00:21:32,501 [metronome ticking] 375 00:21:35,712 --> 00:21:39,132 Now, take yourself back to a memory of a place. 376 00:21:39,132 --> 00:21:43,303 - A real place. A peaceful place. - [exhales deeply] 377 00:21:43,303 --> 00:21:44,680 Do you have it? 378 00:21:45,764 --> 00:21:47,558 - [Dusty] Yep. - Where are you? 379 00:21:48,141 --> 00:21:49,142 I'm skiing. 380 00:21:49,726 --> 00:21:50,978 Please describe it. 381 00:21:52,521 --> 00:21:53,522 It's snowy. 382 00:21:53,522 --> 00:21:55,983 - [chuckles] - More descriptive, please. 383 00:21:55,983 --> 00:21:59,403 I need you to really put yourself there. 384 00:21:59,403 --> 00:22:05,659 Okay. Um, yeah. It's, uh-- I'm skiing. It's snowy. [chuckles] 385 00:22:05,659 --> 00:22:08,036 Uh, I'm maybe 20 years old. 386 00:22:08,036 --> 00:22:10,122 [sighs] 387 00:22:11,456 --> 00:22:13,834 And, uh-- I'm alone. 388 00:22:16,295 --> 00:22:19,965 [breathes deeply] You see, I-I've taken the wrong path on this-- 389 00:22:19,965 --> 00:22:22,176 Or the wrong hill, or whatever you call that. 390 00:22:22,176 --> 00:22:28,682 I'm supposed to be on the Beginner, but I'm on the Black Diamond. [chuckles] 391 00:22:28,682 --> 00:22:34,897 And so I start going real fast, 'cause it's basically like this. 392 00:22:34,897 --> 00:22:40,694 And I am hurtling so quickly down the face of this mountain. 393 00:22:40,694 --> 00:22:43,989 [panting] And I don't know what's gonna happen, 394 00:22:43,989 --> 00:22:46,700 but it's-- God, it feels like, I'm honestly 395 00:22:46,700 --> 00:22:49,578 like I'm gonna-- like I'm gonna, like I'm gonna die. [chuckles] 396 00:22:51,455 --> 00:22:55,626 But I also feel very alive. 397 00:22:57,794 --> 00:22:59,338 [Mr. Johnson] Eyes closed, please. 398 00:23:00,547 --> 00:23:02,341 Where are you? Where is this mountain? 399 00:23:02,341 --> 00:23:05,093 It's in Canada. Uh, British Columbia. 400 00:23:05,093 --> 00:23:09,056 - Where? Be specific. - This-- This place called Whistler. 401 00:23:09,056 --> 00:23:10,766 [Mr. Johnson] And what was your card? 402 00:23:12,392 --> 00:23:14,144 - "Teacher/Whistler." - [Mr. Johnson] No. 403 00:23:14,144 --> 00:23:17,689 Your card. That you picked from the deck. 404 00:23:19,274 --> 00:23:21,401 - Four of hearts. - [Mr. Johnson] Check your pocket. 405 00:23:21,401 --> 00:23:24,571 [drumroll playing] 406 00:23:26,365 --> 00:23:27,366 [drumroll stops] 407 00:23:27,366 --> 00:23:28,575 The seven of spades. 408 00:23:28,575 --> 00:23:31,787 [audience laughing] 409 00:23:31,787 --> 00:23:33,914 [Mr. Johnson] Maybe that was Father Reuben's card. 410 00:23:33,914 --> 00:23:37,000 [audience laughing, cheering] 411 00:23:44,508 --> 00:23:48,595 And now, for my final trick! "The Disappearing Woman." 412 00:23:48,595 --> 00:23:49,805 Cassandra Hubbard. 413 00:23:49,805 --> 00:23:54,393 When I reopen the doors to this coffin, you will be gone! 414 00:23:54,393 --> 00:23:55,519 Ooh. 415 00:23:55,519 --> 00:23:58,188 Please welcome my beautiful assistant... 416 00:23:58,188 --> 00:24:02,025 [audience clapping] 417 00:24:02,860 --> 00:24:04,987 ...who will twirl the coffin around 418 00:24:04,987 --> 00:24:09,074 just to show you there is nothing out of the ordinary. 419 00:24:09,074 --> 00:24:10,576 - Hello, darling. - Hi. 420 00:24:10,576 --> 00:24:12,244 - Hold your breath. - Okay. 421 00:24:24,548 --> 00:24:27,801 Assistant, please open the coffin! 422 00:24:42,357 --> 00:24:44,109 The Great Morphini thanks you all. 423 00:24:44,109 --> 00:24:47,613 And thanks to our brave volunteers. 424 00:24:49,615 --> 00:24:52,826 Well, actually, we're not quite done! 425 00:24:52,826 --> 00:24:54,578 I have an announcement to make. 426 00:24:57,039 --> 00:24:59,541 I'll be stepping down as mayor of Deerfield. 427 00:24:59,541 --> 00:25:00,918 [crowd murmurs] 428 00:25:00,918 --> 00:25:03,962 I can't in good conscience continue when I've broken your trust 429 00:25:03,962 --> 00:25:07,841 by lying about my MORPHO card. 430 00:25:07,841 --> 00:25:10,427 - [Jacob sighs] - [Izzy] Why did I lie? 431 00:25:11,512 --> 00:25:13,639 Because I saw the writing on the wall. 432 00:25:14,223 --> 00:25:16,934 Because I saw the people of this town placing greater trust 433 00:25:16,934 --> 00:25:19,811 in the prognostications of this machine 434 00:25:19,811 --> 00:25:22,439 than in their hobbled old mayor, 435 00:25:22,439 --> 00:25:23,982 and I don't blame you. 436 00:25:24,566 --> 00:25:26,360 In fact, I envy you. 437 00:25:26,360 --> 00:25:29,530 You believe in this machine without questioning where it came from, 438 00:25:29,530 --> 00:25:33,700 or even Mr. Johnson, our "master illusionist," 439 00:25:33,700 --> 00:25:37,955 when he claims he wasn't there when it magically appeared in his store. 440 00:25:37,955 --> 00:25:40,040 You don't have the coldhearted skepticism 441 00:25:40,040 --> 00:25:43,126 to ask about security tapes or any kind of proof. 442 00:25:43,126 --> 00:25:46,713 Izzy, you know my cameras weren't hooked up. 443 00:25:46,713 --> 00:25:48,340 - Why-- - That's right. 444 00:25:48,966 --> 00:25:50,384 But you did say Jacob was there. 445 00:25:50,384 --> 00:25:53,595 And luckily Jacob knows all kinds of things about the machine. 446 00:25:53,595 --> 00:25:58,016 He was telling me that the fingerprints and the Socials are all a scam. 447 00:25:58,016 --> 00:25:59,184 Is that what you said? 448 00:25:59,184 --> 00:26:01,436 [Jacob] No, wait, okay, that's not what I was trying to-- 449 00:26:01,436 --> 00:26:03,689 And Jacob can get blank cards from the machine, 450 00:26:03,689 --> 00:26:05,482 since he so kindly provided me with one. 451 00:26:05,482 --> 00:26:07,901 Okay, I didn't give it to you. I gave it to Trina. 452 00:26:07,901 --> 00:26:09,152 [audience murmurs] 453 00:26:09,152 --> 00:26:12,155 I mean, I kn-- I knew it was f-- [stammers] I knew it was for you. 454 00:26:12,155 --> 00:26:13,824 I didn't directly hand it to you, but I-- 455 00:26:13,824 --> 00:26:15,409 [Izzy] It's not your fault, Jacob. 456 00:26:15,909 --> 00:26:18,579 I don't want anyone pointing fingers at Jacob or Cass. 457 00:26:18,579 --> 00:26:20,205 Why would anyone blame Cass? 458 00:26:20,205 --> 00:26:23,083 Oh. For making the fake card. 459 00:26:23,083 --> 00:26:24,626 - [audience clamoring] - Oh, fuck. 460 00:26:24,626 --> 00:26:26,461 [Izzy] I never would have dragged Cass into this, 461 00:26:26,461 --> 00:26:28,130 except she's the only one with the equipment 462 00:26:28,130 --> 00:26:31,300 to make convincing fakes, see? 463 00:26:32,885 --> 00:26:37,973 [scoffs] What are you trying to say? I only made you one fake card. 464 00:26:37,973 --> 00:26:38,891 [audience gasps] 465 00:26:38,891 --> 00:26:41,685 Don't gasp! She just told you that. 466 00:26:41,685 --> 00:26:44,313 Cass, I'm defending you, honey. [chuckles] 467 00:26:44,313 --> 00:26:47,816 Now, I can assure everyone here that Cass hasn't made any more of these, 468 00:26:47,816 --> 00:26:49,526 and I for one believe her card, 469 00:26:49,526 --> 00:26:52,362 which happens to say she's royalty, is real. 470 00:26:53,488 --> 00:26:56,283 So I won't have any one of you questioning the Potential Fund 471 00:26:56,283 --> 00:26:59,786 or any other profits she may have incurred from MORPHO-related merchandise. 472 00:26:59,786 --> 00:27:03,749 After all, Cass isn't the only one making money off of this thing. 473 00:27:03,749 --> 00:27:08,045 I know Martha and Rose quadrupled business since the arrival of the MORPHO, 474 00:27:08,045 --> 00:27:12,257 with people like Coach Eagleson inspired to have affairs there. 475 00:27:12,257 --> 00:27:14,760 - [audience clamors] - She's even put in a moat. 476 00:27:15,427 --> 00:27:16,720 Oh, let's be real, people. 477 00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:19,014 If Cass were making any other fake cards, 478 00:27:19,014 --> 00:27:22,017 she certainly would have made a better one for her own husband. 479 00:27:22,017 --> 00:27:26,021 She would've given him something more like, I don't know, Superstar. 480 00:27:26,021 --> 00:27:26,939 [chuckles] 481 00:27:26,939 --> 00:27:29,191 All right. Izzy, that's enough. 482 00:27:29,191 --> 00:27:31,860 It is. It's enough, people. 483 00:27:31,860 --> 00:27:33,529 Can't you see this was simply 484 00:27:33,529 --> 00:27:36,365 an act of sacrifice from a daughter for her mother, 485 00:27:36,365 --> 00:27:38,492 so that I could pretend I once had potential, 486 00:27:38,492 --> 00:27:40,077 when in reality, I was-- 487 00:27:40,077 --> 00:27:41,537 How'd you put it, Cass? 488 00:27:43,080 --> 00:27:45,207 "A glorified backup dancer, 489 00:27:45,207 --> 00:27:47,209 whose life's greatest achievement was 490 00:27:47,209 --> 00:27:51,588 playing Swing Number Three in a shitty Broadway musical." 491 00:27:52,798 --> 00:27:55,300 [audience murmurs] 492 00:27:55,300 --> 00:27:56,385 [Cass scoffs] 493 00:27:57,177 --> 00:28:00,389 Okay, do not listen to this woman. 494 00:28:00,389 --> 00:28:02,891 She lies about everything. 495 00:28:02,891 --> 00:28:05,561 She just wants things to go back to the way they were, 496 00:28:05,561 --> 00:28:08,146 so that she can have power again. But-- 497 00:28:08,146 --> 00:28:11,733 But we can't do that. We can't go back. We can't, we can't. I'm sorry. 498 00:28:11,733 --> 00:28:13,318 No, it's, uh, the machine. 499 00:28:13,318 --> 00:28:16,572 The MORPHO machine means something, doesn't it? 500 00:28:16,572 --> 00:28:18,240 [chuckles] I mean, I can see that now. 501 00:28:18,240 --> 00:28:20,826 I don't know what it means, but it means something. So... 502 00:28:21,451 --> 00:28:24,079 While we all figure it out, we cannot allow Izzy-- 503 00:28:25,455 --> 00:28:26,456 [audience murmurs] 504 00:28:26,456 --> 00:28:28,166 to distract us-- Shit.