A NETFLIX SERIES
Hi, everyone!
-Go, Sil! -You're killing it!
Really super!
God, I love Vail.
I love you, Vail!
-Keep going! -That's it! Yes!
-I was amazing! -Amazing!
This champ deserves to go shopping.
Yes!
May I take a photo for Hello! magazine.
Sorry. Hold on.
What happened?
I tried to save you, but the mosquito got away.
Again?
It must be starving just like everyone in this barrio.
It didn't look like a mosquito.
It was as big as a cricket with the face of a baby roach.
Stop, please!
Get me out of here.
Even if it's just to go on vacation. Do something.
Providing your employees with a family integration trip
will not only make them happier.
It will boost their productivity by 95%.
What say you, boss?
Is the family getaway a go?
Well.
Hell yes!
-Great! -Let's do it!
Get your family ready. I know the perfect place.
I can't wait to surprise my family.
-Do you have a family? -A daughter, Brittany.
But she's on vacation with her mom.
But I'm working on getting
a new family for myself.
Hold on because I have a surprise.
This weekend you are invited to the Rigo Events integration trip.
A trip?
Yes. It's actually close by.
It'll be like a family picnic but with a cooler name.
I don't like picnics.
I hate getting dirty, and I always have to make food.
I'll get the food and everything.
Since Chayo left me
and Brittany alone, you're the closest thing I have to a family.
Especially with Tina back and single, right?
Stop it, Mom.
But you know how people love to gossip in the barrio.
They'll start talking.
I get it.
Sorry for feeling closer to you than a compadre should.
Hold on.
Frankly, a getaway is always welcome, even if it's just for the day.
We haven't left town in ages.
Our last trip was to Chimulco, when we taught Pablo how to float.
Look at this cutie pie. Beautiful, right?
His eyes look green from all that pool chlorine.
That swim ring was too big.
You know what? You're right, Mom.
-So you're coming? -I can't this weekend.
-I'm taking Diego to his first protest. -Come on, Teresa.
You go to protests every day, and things never improve.
No excuses. We haven't had quality time as a family in ages.
So we'd be glad to accept your invitation to the picnic.
-Fine. -We're going.
-Yeah. Okay. -We're going. Eat up.
It's obvious. The compadre has the hots for you.
Of course not. He actually dated Leonor.
Rumor has it you made out with him and that's why Leonor was mad at you.
You shouldn't listen to rumors. That's all they are.
Leo said you dedicated songs to him on the radio.
Stop bullshitting.
Leo will get mad.
No! God forbid.
Leo is in heaven with the love of her life.
Plus, the compadre is married.
I mean, separated.
He's the kind of guy who rebounds with the first woman he finds.
Stop. I don't buy this jealous brother act.
It's all in your head.
Just enjoy the outing and cut the crap.
Finally!
A well-deserved weekend vacation.
Is it really happening?
It's just for the weekend. Why bring two suitcases?
One for clothes and one for makeup and accessories.
Chivis, what's all that?
Just the basics.
Let's go.
Where's the driver?
Compadre!
Compadre Neto and his family, all right!
Ready for some family integration?
Wait. We're travelling with him?
No, ma'am, we're not travelling. You asked for a quick getaway.
Why go on a long journey when we have the Primavera Reserve nearby?
Leave the bags and hop in the limo.
Stop blabbing. It's getting late. Let's get going already!
Yeah, let's go.
No, thank you. I'm not getting into that.
Bye.
Hey, what's going on, Neto?
This is family integration, right?
Either integrate or lose your job.
Chivis!
Hop in. The park awaits.
Here we are!
Wow! Look at all this.
-Good work, Rigo. -Check it out.
I love these balloons.
I almost suffocated in there.
What is this?
I knew it, Pablo.
Do you have reception?
No, it's totally dead.
What can I do? My fans need to hear from me.
Our fans.
Whatever. We need reception now.
Let's look around.
Did you get porta-potties?
Porta-potties?
Why get those when you have this whole bathroom?
Hold on, compadre.
I need a favor.
Frankly, I want to use this picnic to get Agustina to fall for me.
But ever since she moved to Ciudad Juárez,
she seems very different to me, a bit stuck up.
-Agustina? Stuck up? -Don't you think?
I have no experience with dating high-class women.
But you're a natural in the field, a preppy aboriginal.
Just think of all the women who line up to see you strut your stuff.
We'll find a way.
Compadre.
-I really need your advice. -I need to…
You can wear these. Just don't sweat too much.
Thanks, I'm good as is.
No, Chivis, dear!
It's the day of family integration.
We have to
integrate.
-Babe, he's my boss. -So?
This will be a nightmare, Ernesto. Let's leave.
No, Chivis. We'll have to play all his games.
Welcome to Integration Day, presented to you by Rigo Events!
We have everything we need to have a hell of a time!
We have the sack race in pairs.
The blind race in pairs.
Relay races in pairs.
The pair to win the most games
will get concert tickets to see Los Ángeles Azules!
You don't even know who they are.
Of course, I do. They sing with Paty Cantú.
You only know the duet album? So predictable.
Ladies, settle down.
We haven't started and the claws are already out.
Save your fighting spirit for the games!
I will wreck you.
I will crush you.
Following the lottery Rigo arranged,
the following people will be paired up.
Germán and Tomás.
Tere and Diego.
Cata and Janet.
Chivis and Neto.
We better win, okay?
Crista and Pablo.
Agustina and Rigo.
We're not playing. We need to find a signal.
Besides, we need something interesting, not this family sack race.
What's wrong with our fans meeting our families?
You wanna lose followers?
I guess not.
Crista, wait up, please.
Take it easy, Pablo. Relax, okay?
It's obvious who's in charge.
No one is. We decide together.
-Are you sure? -Yeah.
Why aren't you playing, then? I thought you liked the blind man's race.
No way, there's a blind man's race?
Yeah, didn't you hear?
I can't. We have work to do.
-Crista? -She went that way.
Now you made me lose her. Crista!
Unbelievable.
Genie, your compadre wants me to help him win over your sister-in-law.
For me, I don't think compadres should be messing with your relatives.
I won't help him.
Well, unless you want me to?
Get ready.
Running outdoors isn't like running on a treadmill, Blondie.
Since I got to the barrio, I've been running outside.
See these freckles.
Freckles or not, I'll win as a real Los Ángeles Azules fan.
How many concerts have you seen?
In Los Angeles, Chicago, or here?
Show-off.
How about this technique? I will speak in a hushed whisper.
Tina will have to lean in, and I'll get intense.
Yes. High-class women love intensity
and when you grab their waist,
plus sassy compliments and mischievous groping.
That's what I was thinking, but with respect.
We'll be disrespectful later in the dark.
Tiger.
Genie.
Give me a sign.
I'm in the fog.
Blind man's race
is the name of this game.
You have to guide your blindfolded partner to the finish line.
Questions?
We'll win. We know each other with our eyes closed.
I wonder if they put a spell on Diego.
Hey! What's going on?
Sorry, son, I thought you were cheating.
We gotta win because I'd love to go to the concert with you.
What? I can't hear what you're saying.
Speak up.
On your marks.
Get set.
Go!
-Go left, go right. -I'm so scared.
What if there's a bug?
Oh, shit!
Which side is this?
-My left. -Left?
No, wait. Turn left!
Sorry, I meant right.
-Disgusting. -Gross.
Hurry.
That's right, straight ahead.
To your right!
I said your right, Ernesto!
You know what? This is better. Very fast.
There, see?
Hurry up, go.
Straight ahead.
I better grab your waist, so you can guide me. I can't see.
Hey, don't get sleazy!
Let's hold hands like we used to.
No! You can grab my elbow.
Stop groping me, dude. I may fall in love.
Straight ahead.
Come on, Germán!
Your job was to guide me!
Bye, sayonara, ciao!
Diego, Tere! Stop grabbing each other.
-That's cheating! -What?
There!
No!
-We won! -No!
How could I ever forget you?
Blondie, name the song if you're such a fan.
"The Ribbon in Your Hair."
Wrong. "My Emotions."
Enough, Ernesto. You lost.
You lost.
It's over.
Crista!
Oh no.
Crista! Where are you?
Frankly, I hate sweating.
But I don't care as long as that tacky blonde doesn't win.
I bet she dances salsa, not cumbia.
Just like you.
I do it for fun.
I know the difference.
If she wins, it'd be like you always say, Janet.
Cultural expropriation.
Cultural appropriation, which doesn't apply, since she's Mexican.
Whatever.
You gotta help me win. Understand?
-Yes! -Yes!
That's the spirit!
Yes.
-What is up with her? -No idea.
Crista!
-Crista! -Here, handsome.
What's up, Pablito? Who did you lose?
My best friend Crista.
A beautiful blonde, seen her?
Best friend? Lame.
-Why are you here? -To camp and kick back.
But we can help you find your best friend.
I know this park.
No, thanks.
She's probably over there.
By the river.
Watch out if you go by the river.
Some spots are really deep.
I know. I stepped in them.
Okay.
We'll be going, then.
Take care.
Crista!
FOOD SECTION
Neto. Nothing's working.
Tina was very evasive with me.
You're doing great. Keep it up.
Look. Classy women are
very confident.
You need to wear them down.
Like in the beginning of a match, you move hard against your opponent,
so they see you as an equal, not a wimp.
I get it.
I should be pressing and shooting.
Right. Get her out of her comfort zone with hard truths.
They love that. It turns them on.
Tough love.
-I'll give it my all. -Go!
Genie.
The sign.
Crista, come on!
-What are you doing? -I got your headband.
Yuck, that's not mine. Whatever.
Take me to the limo to charge my phone.
The limo.
You know the way back?
'Cause I don't remember.
No.
I don't remember the way, but we have to get back before dark.
Ever see The Blair Witch?
No? Good for you. I couldn't watch it all the way through.
As soon as I hear a kid's voice, I'm running.
Don't be ridiculous.
Also, you're blonde.
Blondes are always the first to die in horror movies.
This is a game of life or death.
It's called the sack race.
The first pair to cross the finish line wins.
Easy! Like CrossFit.
CrossFit?
When rich people pay to lift stuff like construction workers. Right, Rigo?
At least they strive to look good.
We all know you never run, even if your house caught fire.
You're hilarious. Should I clap?
Get in the sack, go.
We might not fit, Tina.
You're no longer the same.
Don't rush. Go at a steady pace.
See? You always do this.
I get too excited.
It'd be nice if you let me get excited first for once.
Are we talking about sacks?
No, Diego!
Just the sacks.
-Forget it. I'm getting out. -Tere.
-On your marks. -Tere.
Ready.
Go!
Don't stop!
-I'm tired! -Didn't bring your oxygen tank?
I left it back home. Carry me!
Come on!
No!
I'm the one who's out of shape? I can't believe you.
Instead of insulting me, you should've run faster.
You mean hop faster, not run.
The Espinozas!
Tere.
-You need to calm down. -How can I?
That's what people say when I protest all these injustices.
What's this about?
The game? The real game is Mexico, Diego.
Tere!
You and your imagination.
Instead of hitting on me, Rigo was a total jerk.
Oh yes.
Look, Tina.
I bet he's playing tough love.
Knock you off your pedestal for attention.
Yeah, pretty desperate move on his part.
Next, he'll pull the dancing routine.
Which one's that?
Don't tell me. You keep putting things in my head.
Beat it. You annoy me.
Beat it.
See how you are, Tina?
-This wards off the witch. -I got a signal!
I got a signal.
I got a signal!
I'm lost!
Totally lost!
If you see this story, call the authorities.
Record our location for the police.
Move, Pablo!
Pray for me, and use the hashtag #FindCrista.
It didn't post!
Why didn't you listen to me?
You didn't even record me.
They'll know I'm with you because you shut me up.
This is not the time to get intense, Pablo! Okay?
You're not helping.
Weakening my rival didn't work. But I'm trying to help you.
I looked for gluten-free bread.
This is gluten-free?
I said looked, not found.
The thing is, he who gives a compadre bad advice
is no compadre.
He who hits on a compadre's sister is no compadre either.
And Genaro was our compadre.
That's a rule from the Compadre Manual.
Genie always mentioned it.
Genaro and I wrote it together.
Clearly stating that if a compadre dies, the other one watches over his family.
-Really? -Word.
The Compadre Manual aside,
the truth is I never got over Tina.
I'd like to have a chance with her again.
That's why I need a real solid from you.
Look,
Tina loves dancing.
And if we're good at anything in the barrio,
aside from playing dumb when it comes to paying our tab,
it's dancing.
I need you to let us win,
so I can take Tina to the concert and win her over by dancing.
Only old people flirt when they dance.
No, compadre.
You dance like you fuck.
I want Tina to see I got some saucy, sexy, godly moves.
So help me out with this.
-No. -Or else
face the consequences.
Are you helping your boss hit on that ticket thief?
You know what could happen if he marries that catalog pusher?
She'll be even more empowered!
Even more than Müller or Gaviota!
Besides, I'm a real fan of Los Ángeles even if they only do duets.
So you must win, Ernesto.
Or else, face the consequences, got it?
Don't go, babe.
You got toilet paper stuck to you.
Now I'm mad.
If you don't help me, that straw head will win the tickets.
They were never meant for you, Auntie.
I want those tickets.
Los Ángeles reminds me of my teenage years.
It was right after one of their shows that I went from being a girl to a woman.
-Gross, Aunt! -I love that song.
-Oh no, I pictured it. -Enough.
Give me a break.
Let's do the cheer you taught me.
Okay. Let's do it.
López!
I'm gonna die out here.
Pablo, please record my farewell video.
If we die, let's do a joint farewell.
No, dude. Me first, then yours, if you want.
If the witch is going to eat us, I might as well come clean.
I'm sick of things always going the way you want.
You always decide what we post and never ask what I think.
I'm a wimp in this relationship.
Fake relationship. Besides, you'd be no one without me.
Not to be mean. You're really nice, but no one follows Toxicutes for you.
Who would be Belinda's Nodal if not for me?
The most exciting moment is here!
We have a tie between two couples.
Silvia and Ernesto.
Agustina and Rigo.
Therefore,
whoever wins the spoon race will win the tickets for the concert.
Easy as pie.
I'm real good at putting things in my mouth.
Back as a waitress, I carried four beers in each hand.
Guess where the limes went.
Let's do this. Let's go!
On your marks.
Get set.
Move it, Mr. Ernesto!
-Hurry up, Ernesto! -You got this, Rigo!
Hurry!
-Let's go! -Come on!
-Come on, Ernesto. -Hurry.
Come on, Tina!
-Go, Auntie! -Go, Tina!
-Come on. -Go, Tina!
Go!
Last chance, Genie.
Tell me if I should help my compadre Rigo.
The sign!
I won!
I'm going to the concert!
-I won! -I can't believe it.
Excellent! You finally understood the Compadre Manual.
Thanks for the slip-up.
It's what my Genie wanted.
Here comes your wife.
Take tomorrow off in case there's trouble at home.
My darling,
about that slip-up…
It was an accident.
You sleeping on the couch will be an accident too.
For you, Genie.
Are you upset?
What's up, Pablito?
You didn't return, so I got worried. I thought you drowned.
-He can't swim. -I can. I learned last year.
In his pool.
Hi, I'm Crista.
Whoa, I'm
Cristiano.
Crista.
Cristiano.
Listen.
I've seen Toxicutes.
Are you dating,
or just friends?
We're dating but only online.
We do it to get followers.
Okay.
If you ever want to collaborate, I'm up for it.
I'm an urban artist with a few followers.
That'd be great!
I want to change up the Toxicutes profile.
Tell me about it.
The fact that our names are Crista and Cristiano is the best.
-It can't be. -Last place…
it's a tie between Janet and Cata and Tere and Diego.
Can't even lose right!
Ignore him, you'll do better next time.
Second to last place, Tomás and Germán.
I thought you'd win since you know each other from behind.
I mean, from way back.
Second place goes to Chivis and Ernesto!
Let's hear it for them!
Save your applause for the winning couple of this field trip.
Agustina and Rigo!
Come get your prize, Tina.
-Congratulations, beautiful. -Thanks.
What's with you?
See? I told you, this didn't look good from the start.
Ow, it hurts.
I doubt I've ever exercised this much.
That's what you get for being so stubborn.
You've changed, Tina.
I'm not an old crone, Mom.
I know this much, Los Ángeles Azules are worth it.
Who's that?
Hold on.
Son of a bitch.
What do you want?
Are you busy, Tina? Can we talk?
Sorry about today.
Those things I told you were wrong, so was my behavior.
You really surprised me, Rigo.
It's not like you.
Yeah, I know, sorry.
I only thought of myself and my feelings for you.
I mean, the truth is…
well…
despite all the years, I still…
I never got over you.
I appreciate your candor, Rigo.
But I'm still mourning.
Plus, you were dating my sister when you kissed me,
but told me you broke up.
She didn't answer my calls.
Leonor always did that when she got mad.
I didn't know.
Sorry for the slap. I didn't know how to react.
About the concert…
It's not fair to you. Take whomever you want with you.
No, it's not fair to you.
Keep them.
Besides,
you're the fan.
Right?
You look good in red.
Were you here the whole time?
Yes. I'm the chaperon.
No need. I can take care of myself.
I may be stubborn, but I'm not foolish.
So? Are we going to see Los Ángeles?
No. I'm not really a fan.
Give it to someone who's dying to go.
Okay. Your loss, my win, and someone else's gain.
Cheers to that.
I only want to be a friend to you
These are not unfair things
It's the heart that calls the shots
You won't say how you got that ticket?
What? This one?
No.
It's a secret.
After you get back from the concert, can I sleep in our bed again?
-That depends. -On what?
How well you dance.
Don't they say that the way you dance is the way
you fuck?
Are you ready?
Subtitle translation by: Ana G. González Meade