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A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES
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Pay attention
to your lover's backside as it rises up…
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00:00:15,808 --> 00:00:21,105
…and as it goes down,
sensually, with their breathing.
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00:00:21,189 --> 00:00:23,566
You know, my backside
was famous when I was in jail?
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I know exactly
what feelings it can provoke.
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-Ew! It does nothing for me.
-Mm. Ay!
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Tantra yoga helps us improve our sex life
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when we are in direct contact
with the body of our partner.
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Cut it out, babe!
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Very good! Wonderful! What a lion he is!
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-Keep it coming. Come on!
-Inhale. Exhale. Very good!
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You're doing it wrong. Pay attention!
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All right. All right.
I think we'll stop here.
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I don't want any accidents.
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And to everybody, namaste.
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Master.
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I'd like to give thanks to one person
who exudes sexuality.
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Let's say
he's the Penis Master, a natural.
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-Oh man, she must've saw me.
-Genaro.
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I'd like to ask you to share your light
with the followers of my blog.
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And make a video.
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Mm! Bravo!
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Wow, she picked them.
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-Good, Leo, dear.
-Yes?
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-The video is of him alone.
-Hmm.
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Let's say some partners
need to work on being partners.
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Tantra yoga
will help you in particular…
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the Espinozas.
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Huh?
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During the class, the two of you showed
a total lack of sexual connection.
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-Read this.
-Thank you.
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We all know
that if the Lopezes are good at fucking,
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it's because it's cheaper than Netflix.
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Hold on a minute! I do have Netflix,
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and you two,
instead of solving your little issue,
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are always watching what we're doing.
That's why you're frigid.
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Please stop, girls.
Remember that all of us can improve.
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Or tell me honestly.
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Who here can tell me
they have a perfect sex life.
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-Want a lesson?
-Oh!
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Or are you going to miss out on sleeping
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with the best lover in the world,
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also known as me?
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I'm exhausted
from standing on my toes for so long.
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It hurts.
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But, babe…
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You know what, hon?
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Let's do it!
Open up your chakras because here I come!
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Yes!
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-Ooh!
-Ooh!
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That's right, my Penis Master!
Get ready for me. I want you!
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Oh, that's so good!
53
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-You Penis Master!
-Yes!
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Don't stop!
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Yes! Yes! Don't stop!
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Yes, yes, Penis Master!
57
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Don't stop! Yes!
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I have a new idea.
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After witnessing
the tantra teacher's success,
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I remembered that sex sells a lot.
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What do you say?
62
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No, no, no, no.
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Listen, when I was in jail,
I learned pleasure and business don't mix.
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00:03:06,979 --> 00:03:10,358
Okay, but my dad isn't investing a penny.
It's all what I saved on my own.
65
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From the allowances Daddy gave you?
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-Yes!
-Uncle, get dressed! Come on.
67
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Ooh, calm down.
At least I'm wearing something.
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Uh, whatever.
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Any self-respecting CEO
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risks their own money,
like Mark Zuckerberg.
71
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Okay, this is a sex toy service,
like Rappi, but on WhatsApp. Imagine it!
72
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Mm-hmm.
73
00:03:30,670 --> 00:03:33,047
-Ah, Mark Zuckerberg's the Facebook guy.
-Uncle!
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-What?
-Pff!
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Oh, come on!
How am I the unreasonable one?
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You're about to have a quickie
and don't have condoms?
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We'll deliver them.
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You're about to have a quickie,
but don't have Viagra?
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We'll buy you it.
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You're about to have some gay sex
and don't have any poppers?
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We are there for you.
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Diego even composed a jingle.
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Look, I have something you can sell
second-hand in your business.
84
00:04:01,701 --> 00:04:03,786
Hey, check it out. Ta-da!
85
00:04:06,247 --> 00:04:07,832
-There. There.
-Uncle, no way!
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00:04:07,915 --> 00:04:10,793
What are you thinking?
Nobody buys that used.
87
00:04:10,876 --> 00:04:13,337
So should I not be with a divorced woman
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because she's used?
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You're so missing the point.
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00:04:16,424 --> 00:04:20,219
-That's why you don't have a girlfriend.
-You learn about love when you're in jail.
91
00:04:20,303 --> 00:04:22,513
Nobody should have that at all, hmm?
92
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-You're going to Hell.
-Ah!
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00:04:24,849 --> 00:04:27,101
Hey, doesn't she look a bit like Crista?
94
00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:30,563
-What? No! Don't listen to her, babe.
-No! No way, she doesn't.
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-You are awesome, baby.
-Hey!
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Wow! She even talks to you?
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I won't sell her, then.
You can have her, yeah?
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00:04:37,570 --> 00:04:40,614
-Just be sure to bleach her down first.
-What for?
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A careful uncle is better
than a lousy friend.
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Okay?
101
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Is that a saying?
102
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So disgusting.
103
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Are you sure
potatoes get rid of eye circles?
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That's what we do at our house.
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That's true.
106
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Brown people don't have circles
under their eyes.
107
00:05:03,846 --> 00:05:05,973
-Uh, hold on! What's wrong with you?
-Hmm?
108
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I couldn't sleep last night
with all the groaning coming from
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the ghetto masters' house next door,
110
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and you were fast asleep.
111
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We didn't practice
the position I read about.
112
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Oh, no, I don't think
I can carry you like that.
113
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-Am I too heavy?
-I never said that.
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I'm not going to allow
those trashy masters to beat us.
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Look, you have to be the Penis Master.
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Understand?
117
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Don't fret, girls.
The first time is never easy.
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Don't stress.
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Pleasure is like an explosion
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that takes over your whole body.
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Let us begin.
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Women…
…are like a beautiful plant.
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If you give them your fertilizer…
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…they bloom.
125
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-Dad, should I be listening to this?
-Cover your ears, dear.
126
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It's 'cause Pablito refused to help,
and I don't know how to use the Internet.
127
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Besides,
you're the smartest one in the family.
128
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You'll be a badass when you're older.
129
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Go ahead. Post it.
130
00:06:14,250 --> 00:06:17,086
-Oh shit! What's it doing?
-You got some comments.
131
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Ah! Read them to me.
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From @titillo. "What food turns women on?"
133
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From @anonymous.
"I dream of penises. Am I gay"
134
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From @malestud.
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"My wife pressures me
because I can't perform."
136
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Is he in a musical?
137
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You see…
138
00:06:37,231 --> 00:06:39,358
I'll explain it later, dear.
139
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This is so sad. I must help
all the poor men on this planet.
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Dear, let's make another one.
141
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My dearest Titillo,
a really sexy food is potato pancakes.
142
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And you, malestud, don't feel pressured.
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If you really can't do it,
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save your honor and run.
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Follow me for more advice @penismaster.
146
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What is all this garbage?
147
00:07:05,342 --> 00:07:07,178
You've crossed a line, Leo.
148
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What?
149
00:07:08,971 --> 00:07:11,432
I heard your hollering last night. Hmm?
150
00:07:11,932 --> 00:07:14,226
What example
are you setting for the girls?
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00:07:14,310 --> 00:07:16,562
Lovemaking should be done in silence.
152
00:07:16,645 --> 00:07:19,190
That's what pillows are for.
153
00:07:19,273 --> 00:07:20,524
The nuns taught us right.
154
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Sure. A lot of women believe
that pleasure is sinful.
155
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-All pleasure is sinful.
-Hmm?
156
00:07:25,571 --> 00:07:27,323
Except my potato pancakes.
157
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No, it's not, Mamá. Come on.
158
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Haven't you ever felt an orgasm, hmm?
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Like tingling in your little pancake.
160
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Heavenly Mary, free us from sin.
161
00:07:37,583 --> 00:07:40,628
Okay, now, show me one of your damn toys.
162
00:07:40,711 --> 00:07:43,839
This is the "Mm, Ah, Maxi Sensations."
163
00:07:43,923 --> 00:07:47,801
It has ten speeds
and three different kinds of vibration.
164
00:07:49,386 --> 00:07:51,388
-And you can put it in…
-Oh.
165
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…in water.
166
00:07:52,723 --> 00:07:53,933
Oh, that's good.
167
00:07:54,016 --> 00:07:56,268
-And to give your business my blessing.
-Yes.
168
00:07:56,352 --> 00:07:57,394
-For good luck.
-Uh-huh.
169
00:07:57,478 --> 00:07:59,563
And I'll buy a devil costume too.
170
00:07:59,647 --> 00:08:02,149
-There, yes, then.
-Hey, how about some body gloss?
171
00:08:02,233 --> 00:08:03,901
-For what?
-To glow.
172
00:08:03,984 --> 00:08:05,361
Take it down a notch, Tere.
173
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Come on,
I'm not a UFO glowing at night. Please.
174
00:08:09,073 --> 00:08:11,283
You won't regret your purchase.
175
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Obviously,
we don't accept returns or exchanges.
176
00:08:13,911 --> 00:08:15,746
Enjoy your new toy.
177
00:08:17,248 --> 00:08:19,458
Georgie, did you buy that?
178
00:08:19,542 --> 00:08:21,669
No! What's it for?
179
00:08:22,545 --> 00:08:25,965
-It's your order, Yolis.
-Obviously, I didn't buy that!
180
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And please get out of my house.
181
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You! Get in here!
182
00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:37,893
Um…
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00:08:37,977 --> 00:08:40,229
Ah, there are always ups and downs.
184
00:08:40,771 --> 00:08:42,815
Maybe they were offended by your shorts.
185
00:08:42,898 --> 00:08:45,734
I'm making deliveries on my bike.
186
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:48,195
You think it's the packaging?
187
00:08:49,196 --> 00:08:51,657
I can see why somebody might get obsessed.
188
00:08:52,283 --> 00:08:54,285
I mean, offended.
189
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With… With your package.
190
00:08:59,373 --> 00:09:02,751
Give it to me, baby.
191
00:09:02,835 --> 00:09:06,630
Sure, Krstl.
You know, all the people love you.
192
00:09:07,131 --> 00:09:09,466
You are so big and handsome.
193
00:09:09,550 --> 00:09:10,426
Ha-ha.
194
00:09:10,509 --> 00:09:13,053
Funny.
And to end this interview,
195
00:09:13,137 --> 00:09:15,431
mm, tell me, why Mexico?
196
00:09:15,514 --> 00:09:17,391
Please, uh, tell us.
197
00:09:17,474 --> 00:09:21,562
Yeah, baby. Give it to me hard.
198
00:09:21,645 --> 00:09:25,149
What are you doing?
Why are you interviewing a sex doll?
199
00:09:25,232 --> 00:09:26,358
This is why.
200
00:09:26,442 --> 00:09:29,528
In 12 hours, I got 100 followers.
201
00:09:29,612 --> 00:09:33,574
In one month, oh shit!
I'll be the king of North Korea.
202
00:09:33,657 --> 00:09:36,410
They get aroused
with the strangest things in China.
203
00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:38,912
There are these sex comics called…
204
00:09:38,996 --> 00:09:39,997
Hen Tied?
205
00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:42,833
Pablo, not all Asian people are Chinese.
206
00:09:42,916 --> 00:09:45,878
And the comments I read
were from South Korea.
207
00:09:45,961 --> 00:09:48,797
As far as I know,
the Japanese created Hentai.
208
00:09:51,884 --> 00:09:52,926
Please remove those videos!
209
00:09:53,010 --> 00:09:56,680
-Hey, it's from the neighbor.
-Hold on. Let me finish editing this.
210
00:10:02,436 --> 00:10:05,105
Don't you notice anything?
211
00:10:05,189 --> 00:10:06,690
I've been waiting for you forever.
212
00:10:06,774 --> 00:10:09,401
Everything hurts.
Everything, even my pride is hurting.
213
00:10:09,485 --> 00:10:13,280
I bought this tantric chair to practice
the Shiva goddess pose, and you vanish.
214
00:10:13,364 --> 00:10:15,908
I hurt my right knee with my backhand.
215
00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:19,620
-Yeah?
-Uh-huh.
216
00:10:20,996 --> 00:10:22,206
That's not important.
217
00:10:26,669 --> 00:10:27,920
I have something for you,
218
00:10:28,003 --> 00:10:31,006
a massage
that will relax you and feel good.
219
00:10:31,715 --> 00:10:33,384
Ah! Ooh, ooh!
220
00:10:34,802 --> 00:10:36,512
I thought it was your right knee?
221
00:10:37,262 --> 00:10:39,056
I can't believe this.
222
00:10:39,139 --> 00:10:40,641
-This is low.
-Don't be like that!
223
00:10:40,724 --> 00:10:42,685
Besides,
I don't like doing it during the day.
224
00:10:42,768 --> 00:10:45,187
Okay, good. I'm sick of all this tantra.
225
00:10:46,313 --> 00:10:49,525
Remember that night on our honeymoon?
226
00:10:50,401 --> 00:10:52,027
In the pool?
227
00:10:52,111 --> 00:10:56,532
Ah, yes. Yes, I do.
How could I forget that time together?
228
00:10:56,615 --> 00:10:59,284
It was legendary!
229
00:10:59,368 --> 00:11:01,120
Let's repeat that.
230
00:11:03,038 --> 00:11:06,917
Later tonight,
me and you will have a date.
231
00:11:07,418 --> 00:11:08,252
Ping.
232
00:11:08,335 --> 00:11:09,253
These people!
233
00:11:09,837 --> 00:11:11,922
I knew we should charge for cancellations.
234
00:11:12,005 --> 00:11:14,758
The problem is
you can see the product through the bags.
235
00:11:14,842 --> 00:11:16,552
Rich people get too embarrassed.
236
00:11:16,635 --> 00:11:18,929
Being shamed makes you a bad lover.
237
00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:23,058
How do you know that?
How many rich men have you been with?
238
00:11:25,936 --> 00:11:27,688
I can't tell you,
239
00:11:28,355 --> 00:11:31,692
because next, you'll ask me
what I did with each one.
240
00:11:31,775 --> 00:11:32,943
And what's the problem?
241
00:11:34,153 --> 00:11:36,905
I'd be crossing the boundaries
of our work relationship.
242
00:11:38,699 --> 00:11:40,993
But believe me, I know it's true.
243
00:11:45,956 --> 00:11:47,416
Inhale.
244
00:11:47,958 --> 00:11:49,501
Exhale.
245
00:11:49,585 --> 00:11:51,462
Very good.
246
00:11:51,545 --> 00:11:55,924
I usually recommend
to ask for permission before entering.
247
00:11:56,508 --> 00:11:58,969
And we say, "May I come in?"
248
00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:00,012
May I come in?
249
00:12:00,095 --> 00:12:02,431
And it feels like we have permission.
250
00:12:02,514 --> 00:12:08,771
Don't forget to inhale and experience
the universe of possibilities that awaits.
251
00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:13,692
Pleasure is like an explosion…
252
00:12:13,776 --> 00:12:15,611
Oh…
253
00:12:15,694 --> 00:12:17,529
Ah… Oh…
254
00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:21,992
How did you get in?
255
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:24,912
Hey, dude, in fancy communities
nobody locks their door.
256
00:12:24,995 --> 00:12:26,079
We're not animals.
257
00:12:26,163 --> 00:12:27,998
Why did you leave me on red?
258
00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:31,543
Now everyone at school thinks
we're dating thanks to your videos.
259
00:12:31,627 --> 00:12:35,422
They nicknamed me
"Banging Cris", for banging.
260
00:12:35,506 --> 00:12:38,550
Get it?
They're saying I look like the doll.
261
00:12:38,634 --> 00:12:42,805
I thought Mariana was your bestie,
but she gave you the nickname?
262
00:12:42,888 --> 00:12:46,683
I don't know why
you call them your friends, Crista.
263
00:12:46,767 --> 00:12:48,352
Besides, I'm gonna keep posting
264
00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:51,355
because in one of the two Koreas,
I have thousands of followers.
265
00:12:51,438 --> 00:12:54,566
I don't care about your so-called friend
just like she doesn't care about you.
266
00:13:04,034 --> 00:13:05,244
Ugh.
267
00:13:09,414 --> 00:13:11,583
-Ready or not…
-Ready.
268
00:13:13,126 --> 00:13:16,672
Ah, gosh! Damn! My lioness! How sexy!
269
00:13:16,755 --> 00:13:18,590
Let's get down to business.
270
00:13:18,674 --> 00:13:20,467
Come here, darling.
271
00:13:20,551 --> 00:13:22,594
This is it.
272
00:13:22,678 --> 00:13:23,679
-Hold on.
-What?
273
00:13:23,762 --> 00:13:26,098
-I'll be on top.
-Okay. That's it.
274
00:13:26,181 --> 00:13:27,724
There we go.
275
00:13:27,808 --> 00:13:29,560
-Yeah. Come on.
-Ready?
276
00:13:29,643 --> 00:13:31,478
-Grab on to my ass, babe.
-Yes, yes.
277
00:13:31,562 --> 00:13:33,605
-Grab it, honey!
-Yeah.
278
00:13:33,689 --> 00:13:34,606
Mm-hmm.
279
00:13:39,027 --> 00:13:41,780
-What's wrong?
-I've just never been with a woman-devil.
280
00:13:45,826 --> 00:13:48,620
That's all right.
I have something we can play with.
281
00:13:51,039 --> 00:13:53,500
Wh-- Wh-- Wh-- Wh--
What are you doing, Leo?
282
00:13:53,584 --> 00:13:56,795
-I'm not into that.
-I know that. It's not for you.
283
00:13:56,879 --> 00:13:59,423
Sure, it's my fault
for giving you so much pleasure.
284
00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:01,800
Now, one isn't enough. You need two.
285
00:14:01,884 --> 00:14:03,468
Stop it! Enough of that.
286
00:14:05,554 --> 00:14:08,473
I just wanted
to try something new, and, obviously,
287
00:14:08,557 --> 00:14:11,810
it's too much
for the Penis Martyr, or whatever you are.
288
00:14:13,979 --> 00:14:15,731
Penis Master.
289
00:14:18,483 --> 00:14:21,445
-We should've done this way before this!
-Yes!
290
00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:23,155
That tantra rubbish got me all cloudy.
291
00:14:23,238 --> 00:14:25,449
Best part is
we're not getting our house dirty.
292
00:14:25,532 --> 00:14:28,243
You can get me dirty anytime, honey!
293
00:14:30,787 --> 00:14:32,205
Ooh…
294
00:14:32,289 --> 00:14:34,583
-Are you ready?
-Okay.
295
00:14:35,083 --> 00:14:36,710
Shh-shh-shh!
296
00:14:36,793 --> 00:14:39,379
Shh! Shh!
297
00:14:39,463 --> 00:14:42,090
-Come here.
-Shh!
298
00:14:42,174 --> 00:14:43,717
Mm…
299
00:14:46,303 --> 00:14:48,931
-Oh! Oh, honey! Oh, Ernesto!
-Hmm?
300
00:14:50,933 --> 00:14:52,935
-I love it!
-We haven't started…
301
00:14:53,018 --> 00:14:55,729
-The hell!
-Oh, Ernesto, give it to me!
302
00:14:59,524 --> 00:15:01,526
I haven't even started yet.
303
00:15:02,486 --> 00:15:03,362
-Hey.
-Hello.
304
00:15:03,445 --> 00:15:04,363
Hmm?
305
00:15:05,405 --> 00:15:08,033
I thought you people
didn't wear underwear in pools.
306
00:15:09,117 --> 00:15:11,495
-Uh, darling, should we get going?
-Mm.
307
00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:15,248
Yes, please go.
Take the noise inside your own house!
308
00:15:15,332 --> 00:15:16,249
What the-- Uh…
309
00:15:16,333 --> 00:15:21,421
Look who's talking.
The nymphomaniac who caused a racket.
310
00:15:21,505 --> 00:15:24,299
But I don't dirty
other people's pools to get pleasure.
311
00:15:24,383 --> 00:15:27,427
How can you get pleasure
from that monkey husband of yours?
312
00:15:27,511 --> 00:15:30,597
At least my monkey can get it up.
Looks like yours lost his banana.
313
00:15:30,681 --> 00:15:32,724
With all due respect.
314
00:15:32,808 --> 00:15:36,353
Coming, ma'am! I'm coming, ma'am!
Where are the people making a scene?
315
00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:39,147
-Here, engaged in immoral acts.
-No, we aren't. No, no, no!
316
00:15:39,231 --> 00:15:41,316
Everything's good.
317
00:15:41,400 --> 00:15:43,110
-We're handling it.
-Mom!
318
00:15:43,193 --> 00:15:44,111
No, everything's good.
319
00:15:44,194 --> 00:15:46,405
-We'll get them out.
-This is a private pool.
320
00:15:49,908 --> 00:15:52,202
I left Krstl here.
I don't know where she went.
321
00:15:52,285 --> 00:15:55,038
Hmm, what happened?
322
00:15:55,539 --> 00:15:57,040
-No!
-What?
323
00:15:58,792 --> 00:16:00,711
DELETE TIK TOKS OR KRSTL DIES!
324
00:16:01,378 --> 00:16:02,838
Son of a bitch!
325
00:16:03,672 --> 00:16:06,174
-That damn rich girl! Rich girl?
-Mm-hmm.
326
00:16:06,258 --> 00:16:09,344
That damn snobby brat
isn't gonna destroy my doll.
327
00:16:09,428 --> 00:16:12,305
Mm-mm! No, Uncle.
We'll go and rescue Krstl.
328
00:16:12,389 --> 00:16:13,223
Trust me.
329
00:16:18,603 --> 00:16:20,689
Here's your product, "Rappi-din."
330
00:16:21,356 --> 00:16:22,190
Um…
331
00:16:23,108 --> 00:16:24,985
No. I didn't buy anything.
332
00:16:27,487 --> 00:16:29,614
It's a new seven-speed blender
333
00:16:29,698 --> 00:16:32,075
for anything that may need a good…
334
00:16:32,159 --> 00:16:33,285
…shake.
335
00:16:33,368 --> 00:16:35,287
Mm.
336
00:16:35,370 --> 00:16:37,039
Oh, of course!
337
00:16:37,122 --> 00:16:39,332
Yes, I did buy this.
338
00:16:39,416 --> 00:16:41,293
Thank you.
339
00:16:44,796 --> 00:16:45,922
-Yeah!
-Oh!
340
00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:50,802
No need to get
so emotional about business.
341
00:16:50,886 --> 00:16:52,971
This is just our first sale.
342
00:16:59,394 --> 00:17:03,106
How do I seduce my neighbor?
She's a croissant and I'm M&M's!
343
00:17:04,149 --> 00:17:05,984
-Did somebody order a pizza?
-No.
344
00:17:06,068 --> 00:17:08,236
Large juicy exquisite sausage?
345
00:17:08,320 --> 00:17:09,154
It's yours?
346
00:17:09,654 --> 00:17:11,490
No, it's not. What do you mean?
347
00:17:11,573 --> 00:17:13,533
-I'll go this way.
-What address did they give you?
348
00:17:13,617 --> 00:17:16,036
-Yours, doll.
-What? Don't be disrespectful.
349
00:17:19,164 --> 00:17:21,416
Holy Mother of Jesus!
350
00:17:24,294 --> 00:17:27,881
Hey! No! Wait a minute! Mom! Mom!
351
00:17:29,341 --> 00:17:32,552
Mom! Oh.
352
00:17:32,636 --> 00:17:34,805
-I'm serious. It's her!
-What's wrong?
353
00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:38,016
All right!
What are you scheming, you blond bitch?
354
00:17:38,100 --> 00:17:41,561
Okay, if I were you, I'd be nice.
355
00:17:41,645 --> 00:17:44,356
I'm about to send your video
to the neighborhood chat.
356
00:17:44,439 --> 00:17:45,982
We'd be tied after last night.
357
00:17:46,066 --> 00:17:50,070
You brought that on by yourself
by putting on a little porn show.
358
00:17:50,153 --> 00:17:52,280
No wonder you had a fling with that kid.
359
00:17:52,364 --> 00:17:54,199
-Shh!
-Your husband doesn't measure up.
360
00:17:54,282 --> 00:17:57,577
If you keep mentioning Rober,
I'll send this to your husband.
361
00:17:57,661 --> 00:17:59,454
He's not one of your contacts.
362
00:17:59,538 --> 00:18:02,374
I'm on the security committee.
I have everyone's number.
363
00:18:02,457 --> 00:18:03,625
You wouldn't dare.
364
00:18:03,708 --> 00:18:06,670
You also have a video
that could destroy my marriage.
365
00:18:07,504 --> 00:18:10,382
So, stripper for Rober, how about it?
366
00:18:10,465 --> 00:18:12,134
I say no way!
367
00:18:12,217 --> 00:18:16,012
I can talk to Genaro myself, hmm?
But just to show that I'm nice,
368
00:18:17,305 --> 00:18:18,515
I'll give you your yard.
369
00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:19,850
Don't you miss it?
370
00:18:24,646 --> 00:18:25,981
All right!
371
00:18:26,064 --> 00:18:27,732
-All right, I'll delete that.
-Hey!
372
00:18:27,816 --> 00:18:29,401
Wait. There it is.
373
00:18:29,484 --> 00:18:31,778
What did I just do? What did I do?
374
00:18:31,862 --> 00:18:33,989
Wait! Please, delete it!
375
00:18:34,072 --> 00:18:35,699
Oh no!
376
00:18:35,782 --> 00:18:38,326
You just sent it
to Gerardo and all the neighbors!
377
00:18:38,410 --> 00:18:41,163
My husband's name is Genaro!
378
00:18:41,663 --> 00:18:44,207
Same thing. It starts with a G.
379
00:18:44,291 --> 00:18:45,375
Oh, fuck you!
380
00:18:45,876 --> 00:18:48,211
-Get out!
-Get out of here!
381
00:18:48,295 --> 00:18:49,671
It's unbelievable.
382
00:18:49,754 --> 00:18:51,798
Hey, Gennie,
I mean, with this tantra business,
383
00:18:51,882 --> 00:18:53,842
I feel three times
more pressure from Silvia
384
00:18:53,925 --> 00:18:55,927
And I even followed
your advice of running away.
385
00:18:56,011 --> 00:19:01,224
-Oy, you're @malestud?
-Yeah, and I wish that I was @penismaster.
386
00:19:01,308 --> 00:19:02,726
It's not that easy, Neto.
387
00:19:02,809 --> 00:19:03,643
What?
388
00:19:04,436 --> 00:19:08,982
I've turned Leonor into a sex addict.
Now I'm not even enough for her anymore.
389
00:19:09,065 --> 00:19:11,026
If you're not enough for her, then who is?
390
00:19:11,109 --> 00:19:14,905
You ever feel like
you can't fail even one time?
391
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:19,159
Yes, and you feel like
you have to be a pleasure machine.
392
00:19:19,242 --> 00:19:23,288
Yes, exactly. I feel the same way, Neto!
And I don't think it's fair.
393
00:19:23,371 --> 00:19:25,540
-No.
-We have to free ourselves.
394
00:19:25,624 --> 00:19:27,667
Like my grandpa used to say,
395
00:19:27,751 --> 00:19:29,878
"Let your work bring sleep,
396
00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:33,256
and let your pleasure bring play."
397
00:19:33,965 --> 00:19:36,426
Right! Okay!
That's what I'll do with Silvia!
398
00:19:36,509 --> 00:19:39,596
You are the best thing to happen
to all the men in this community.
399
00:19:39,679 --> 00:19:40,639
Come here.
400
00:19:57,948 --> 00:19:59,574
On my signal we move, copy?
401
00:20:00,283 --> 00:20:01,201
Copy, nephew.
402
00:20:03,787 --> 00:20:07,123
You by air, me by land. Got it? Over.
403
00:20:07,207 --> 00:20:08,041
Got it.
404
00:20:08,124 --> 00:20:10,710
Operation Bird Returns to Nest.
Let's begin. Over.
405
00:20:10,794 --> 00:20:11,628
Wait.
406
00:20:12,963 --> 00:20:15,090
If it goes wrong…
407
00:20:16,591 --> 00:20:18,468
…it was a pleasure knowing you, kid.
408
00:20:20,679 --> 00:20:21,513
Baby…
409
00:20:21,596 --> 00:20:23,056
Cheers.
410
00:20:23,139 --> 00:20:24,599
Where is my reward?
411
00:20:24,683 --> 00:20:26,142
I deserve one.
412
00:20:26,685 --> 00:20:29,145
-Mm, yes you do, honey.
-Yes.
413
00:20:29,229 --> 00:20:32,524
Because you deserve a super…
414
00:20:34,150 --> 00:20:35,735
massage.
415
00:20:37,320 --> 00:20:38,321
Okay.
416
00:20:41,992 --> 00:20:44,035
Oh, babe, I missed you.
417
00:20:53,962 --> 00:20:56,548
You want me to pull my clothes off
like that stripper?
418
00:20:57,048 --> 00:20:59,509
That bimbo sent him.
419
00:20:59,592 --> 00:21:01,136
She was trying to entrap me.
420
00:21:01,219 --> 00:21:03,847
Mm-hmm. I'm sure.
421
00:21:03,930 --> 00:21:06,516
What are you mad about?
You smell like a strip club.
422
00:21:07,017 --> 00:21:10,770
Stop pretending. Every time you're sad,
you go and ignore the strippers.
423
00:21:11,730 --> 00:21:14,065
I never complain
because I always think of you
424
00:21:14,149 --> 00:21:15,358
before I think about me.
425
00:21:16,359 --> 00:21:18,778
That's the problem, Genaro.
426
00:21:21,656 --> 00:21:24,034
I need to be able to tell you
427
00:21:24,993 --> 00:21:28,413
what I like and dislike in bed,
without it undermining you.
428
00:21:29,331 --> 00:21:32,459
Hmm?
For example, that wrestler mask you like…
429
00:21:32,542 --> 00:21:35,045
-You know the one.
-Rey Mysterio's mask?
430
00:21:35,128 --> 00:21:36,421
-Yeah.
-Mm-hmm.
431
00:21:36,504 --> 00:21:39,132
It's a big turn-off,
if I'm being honest with you.
432
00:21:39,215 --> 00:21:40,800
I'll get rid of it.
433
00:21:40,884 --> 00:21:41,760
Yes!
434
00:21:44,095 --> 00:21:47,182
Forgive me for not asking you
what you like, little devil.
435
00:21:47,682 --> 00:21:49,351
-But I'm ready now.
-Yeah?
436
00:21:49,434 --> 00:21:51,061
Tell me what you want to do?
437
00:21:51,144 --> 00:21:52,145
-Anything?
-Yeah.
438
00:21:52,771 --> 00:21:56,316
Well, okay then,
Penis Master, for starters…
439
00:21:56,399 --> 00:21:57,734
-Mm-hmm.
-Just a sec.
440
00:21:58,234 --> 00:22:01,154
I wanna try this out. Okay?
441
00:22:01,237 --> 00:22:02,614
-Oh…
-Come on!
442
00:22:03,198 --> 00:22:05,950
It's so weird that rich people
need so much to get aroused, right?
443
00:22:06,034 --> 00:22:07,619
-And you don't?
-Me?
444
00:22:08,912 --> 00:22:10,121
I only need this.
445
00:22:14,626 --> 00:22:18,213
Dear Richie Boy,
tell your girl that you love her style,
446
00:22:18,296 --> 00:22:20,715
and then she will open up her flower.
447
00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:26,888
Are you all right?
448
00:22:28,139 --> 00:22:30,016
-I'm interested in your flower.
-Uh…
449
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:34,396
I mean, in… in your personality,
which is like a flower inside of you.
450
00:22:34,479 --> 00:22:35,313
Mm-hmm.
451
00:22:35,814 --> 00:22:36,940
I'm not a player.
452
00:22:37,023 --> 00:22:38,775
-I don't go with all the girls.
-No.
453
00:22:38,858 --> 00:22:40,819
What I care about is… is in here.
454
00:22:41,569 --> 00:22:42,821
And here.
455
00:22:45,115 --> 00:22:46,241
May I smell your hair?
456
00:22:47,826 --> 00:22:48,827
Okay.
457
00:22:48,910 --> 00:22:50,412
Yes.
458
00:22:50,495 --> 00:22:51,329
Yes.
459
00:22:53,832 --> 00:22:55,250
It smells good.
460
00:22:55,333 --> 00:22:56,918
Uh, yes. Thank you.
461
00:22:57,502 --> 00:22:59,838
Show me your boobs? At least just one.
462
00:22:59,921 --> 00:23:02,424
-Just a look.
-Just shut up.
463
00:23:06,845 --> 00:23:09,722
I'm chafed.
I hadn't ridden my bike since I was eight,
464
00:23:09,806 --> 00:23:11,182
but I can do it, I swear.
465
00:23:11,266 --> 00:23:12,767
Okay.
466
00:23:20,024 --> 00:23:21,526
You deserve it all.
467
00:23:47,635 --> 00:23:49,053
Yeah!
468
00:23:51,723 --> 00:23:53,558
Oh, Beatriz!
469
00:23:57,312 --> 00:23:59,772
-Silvia!
-Mm-hmm.
470
00:23:59,856 --> 00:24:02,692
I can't believe it!
471
00:24:03,276 --> 00:24:07,197
If I were Beatriz, I'd be dead,
and you'd be a necrophile.
472
00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:09,199
Silvia, don't pay attention to me, dear.
473
00:24:09,282 --> 00:24:12,911
It was a very, very stupid mistake.
I saw the tree and it got my head.
474
00:24:12,994 --> 00:24:15,371
Oh no, I've had enough!
I live with the ghost of a woman
475
00:24:15,455 --> 00:24:17,832
who choked on the host
at her son's baptism.
476
00:24:17,916 --> 00:24:19,292
-I can never compete with that!
-No!
477
00:24:19,375 --> 00:24:21,920
-You make me the happiest man alive.
-No, please, let go of me.
478
00:24:22,003 --> 00:24:24,631
Stop, stop, stop, stop! Enough! Bye!
479
00:24:30,887 --> 00:24:32,514
Hey, something's burning, yeah?
480
00:24:33,932 --> 00:24:35,892
It must be me burning for you.
481
00:24:37,769 --> 00:24:38,937
No! Wait! Wait!
482
00:24:40,855 --> 00:24:41,856
I mean it.
483
00:24:45,068 --> 00:24:46,194
No way!
484
00:24:49,155 --> 00:24:52,033
Ay, this horrible big house,
485
00:24:52,534 --> 00:24:54,953
it can't stand even a little bit of smoke.
486
00:24:55,912 --> 00:24:58,039
Oh Lord!
487
00:24:58,122 --> 00:24:59,374
What's going on, Mom?
488
00:24:59,457 --> 00:25:02,377
I was just trying out the charcoal stove.
489
00:25:04,337 --> 00:25:06,923
All right, then,
be more careful next time.
490
00:25:07,006 --> 00:25:09,300
You too. Be very careful.
491
00:25:12,762 --> 00:25:15,932
-Now what?
-Have you turned to the Devil now, Leo?
492
00:25:16,683 --> 00:25:19,811
Guess what?
You know, Genaro loves it, and me too.
493
00:25:20,436 --> 00:25:24,232
Mom, you taught me
some very strange things about sex.
494
00:25:24,315 --> 00:25:27,235
I only taught you
what I was taught when I was young.
495
00:25:28,987 --> 00:25:31,030
That you need to have self-respect.
496
00:25:31,906 --> 00:25:35,076
Yes, Mommy.
I know you had the best intentions.
497
00:25:35,159 --> 00:25:37,745
And since I already know
how to respect myself,
498
00:25:37,829 --> 00:25:40,540
I learned how to ask
instead of just giving.
499
00:25:40,623 --> 00:25:43,376
Being a little bit
devilish isn't that bad.
500
00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:45,545
You should try it sometime.
501
00:25:45,628 --> 00:25:47,005
Mm?
502
00:25:47,088 --> 00:25:47,922
Love you.
503
00:25:51,509 --> 00:25:52,760
Target located.
504
00:25:54,637 --> 00:25:56,306
Watch out! Watch out! It's Crista!
505
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:03,896
DELETE THE TIK TOKS
506
00:26:04,814 --> 00:26:05,690
No!
507
00:26:09,944 --> 00:26:11,487
GHETTO QUEEN CRISTA
508
00:26:11,571 --> 00:26:13,656
No way!
509
00:26:14,699 --> 00:26:16,743
DELETE THE TIK TOKS OR KRSTL DIES
510
00:26:16,826 --> 00:26:18,453
Ugh! Stupid ugly doll!
511
00:26:18,536 --> 00:26:20,872
Oh! You're always right.
512
00:26:42,143 --> 00:26:44,062
Why are you cutting it down?
513
00:26:44,145 --> 00:26:45,313
It's a pretty tree.
514
00:26:45,396 --> 00:26:47,607
-No!
-Oh damn!
515
00:26:47,690 --> 00:26:52,695
It's a reminder that my husband
is always thinking about his dead wife!
516
00:26:55,323 --> 00:26:57,158
He called me Beatriz in bed.
517
00:26:58,117 --> 00:27:00,203
After months of not touching me.
518
00:27:00,787 --> 00:27:03,623
Oh man, I feel like an asshole.
519
00:27:04,123 --> 00:27:06,626
Hey, don't call yourself that.
520
00:27:09,128 --> 00:27:10,254
-Mm.
-Mm-hmm.
521
00:27:12,173 --> 00:27:16,302
-We all screw up once in a while.
-Except you and your Penis Master.
522
00:27:16,386 --> 00:27:19,138
Until before those classes we took,
523
00:27:19,222 --> 00:27:21,808
the truth is that…
524
00:27:21,891 --> 00:27:24,727
…I hadn't felt the things I felt today.
525
00:27:26,270 --> 00:27:30,149
You shouldn't live under
Beatriz's shadow. You come first.
526
00:27:30,233 --> 00:27:33,403
At least that's what I've learned
since I moved to this neighborhood.
527
00:27:34,153 --> 00:27:34,987
Ugh.
528
00:27:49,460 --> 00:27:51,921
Ugh! Fuckin' Pablo, he was right!
529
00:27:52,755 --> 00:27:54,590
I have the worst friends ever!
530
00:27:56,718 --> 00:27:59,178
I mean, for real,
Pablo is my only real friend.
531
00:27:59,262 --> 00:28:01,013
You're awesome!
532
00:28:01,681 --> 00:28:04,267
-You're great!
-Aw.
533
00:28:06,477 --> 00:28:09,021
Oh! You're perfect!
534
00:28:10,398 --> 00:28:12,775
No wonder these dolls are so well-liked.
535
00:28:14,152 --> 00:28:15,194
Oh…
536
00:28:15,278 --> 00:28:16,779
Uncle! Abort!
537
00:28:16,863 --> 00:28:18,489
-Abort! Get out!
-Uh?
538
00:28:19,407 --> 00:28:21,325
Pablo, what's wrong with you?
539
00:28:21,409 --> 00:28:23,745
So, what?
Are we going to charge into her room?
540
00:28:25,455 --> 00:28:27,123
Pablito. Pablo…
541
00:28:27,623 --> 00:28:28,458
Oh no.
542
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:32,295
Goddammit!
You're all a family of degenerates.
543
00:28:32,378 --> 00:28:33,296
Okay, fine, then.
544
00:28:33,796 --> 00:28:35,173
I can't believe this!
545
00:28:35,798 --> 00:28:37,300
What are you doing up there?
546
00:28:37,383 --> 00:28:38,468
Hi, Mom.
547
00:28:39,010 --> 00:28:39,886
Huh?
548
00:28:41,137 --> 00:28:44,724
A Penis Master
isn't the kind of man who brags to others.
549
00:28:44,807 --> 00:28:46,768
Anybody can do that, huh?
550
00:28:47,518 --> 00:28:49,187
The hardest thing to do…
551
00:28:51,397 --> 00:28:53,900
…is talk to your partner.
552
00:28:54,525 --> 00:28:57,278
There's always something
that we don't want to hear.
553
00:28:58,529 --> 00:29:01,115
So, my dear followers, be ready.
554
00:29:01,199 --> 00:29:05,161
Because changing is very hard,
but it's possible, huh.
555
00:29:05,703 --> 00:29:08,289
Because we shouldn't just satisfy others.
556
00:29:09,207 --> 00:29:12,335
That's why first you have to know
what makes yourself happy.
557
00:29:12,418 --> 00:29:14,837
Then do what you can
to please the other person.
558
00:29:15,671 --> 00:29:19,133
If nobody ever told you
that you have a natural talent,
559
00:29:19,217 --> 00:29:20,593
don't get sad, huh.
560
00:29:21,219 --> 00:29:24,013
Not everybody can be
a genius in bed like me, you know.