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AN ORIGINAL NETFLIX SERIES
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Watch your lover's butt
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as they rise up
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and go down sensually
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during the breathing exercise.
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Speaking of butts,
mine was famous in jail.
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I know how arousing it can be.
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Cut it out.
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Tantric yoga helps improve our sex drive
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as we put our bodies in contact
with our partners' bodies.
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Cut it out, honey!
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-Very good! What a lion!
-Keep going.
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-Inhale, exhale, very good.
-You're doing it wrong. Pay attention.
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Okay, I think we'll stop here
to avoid any accidents.
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And to all of you, namaste.
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Mastes.
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I'd like to acknowledge
someone who exudes sexuality.
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Let's just say
he's a natural penis master.
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She caught me!
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Genaro, I'd like to ask you
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to share your light
on my blog with a video.
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Bravo!
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Leo, dear.
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-Yes?
-It's just him in the video.
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Let's just say that some partners
aren't such great partners yet.
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Tantric yoga will be particularly helpful
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for the Espinozas.
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What?
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You transmitted
a total lack of sexual connection.
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-Read it.
-Thanks.
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Everybody knows
if the Lopezes are good in bed
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it's because it's cheaper than Netflix.
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Forgive me, but I do have Netflix,
and instead of solving your issue,
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you two spy on us, which causes frigidity.
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Girls, remember we can all improve.
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Or be honest and tell me
which of us has a perfect sex life?
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You want a class?
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Don't miss a roll in the hay
with the country's best lover,
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yours truly.
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I'm sore all over
from standing on my toes so long.
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But honey…
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On second thought,
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open up those chakras wide for me,
because here I come!
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Yes! Come!
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Giddyap, penis master!
It's the ride of your life!
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-Oh, yes!
-That's my penis master!
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Keep going!
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Yes!
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Yes, penis master!
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Yes! More!
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I got a new business idea.
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The tantra teacher's success
reminded me how much sex sells.
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Interested?
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00:03:01,599 --> 00:03:06,854
No, in jail I learned not to mix
business with pleasure.
55
00:03:06,938 --> 00:03:10,316
Dad's not investing a penny.
It's all from my savings.
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From the allowance Daddy gives you?
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-She's right.
-Uncle, get dressed!
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But I am dressed.
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Any self-respecting CEO
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risks their own money
like Mark Zuckerberg.
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It'll be like Rappi,
but using WhatsApp to sell sex toys.
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Just imagine.
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Facebook's Zuckerberg?
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-Uncle!
-What?
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I can't do what I want in my own home?
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"No condoms for a quickie?
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We deliver them.
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No Viagra for a quickie?
We buy it for you.
69
00:03:46,686 --> 00:03:49,897
Are you looking for a gay fling
and need some poppers?
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We're there for you."
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Diego even composed a jingle.
Qui-ckie!
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Look, you can sell
this second-hand in your business.
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Check it out. Ta-da!
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Hold on.
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Have you lost your mind?
Nobody buys those used.
76
00:04:10,835 --> 00:04:14,422
So, you're saying you can't be
with a divorcee because she's used?
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That's why you never had a girlfriend.
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Only convicts know what love is.
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No one should have one of those.
You're going to hell.
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Doesn't she look like Crista?
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-What? Never mind her.
-Of course not.
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You are awesome, baby.
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Wow! She speaks English!
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She's yours for free, nephew.
Just bleach her down first.
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-What for?
-Better safe than make your buddy sorry.
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Right?
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Is that a saying?
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What a dump.
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-So, potatoes remove dark circles?
-Yes. We use them at home.
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But brown skin doesn't get dark circles.
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What's wrong with you?
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I couldn't sleep with all the moaning
from the ghetto masters next door,
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while you slept like a log,
we didn't practice the position I wanted.
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I can't carry you like that.
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-Are you calling me fat?
-I said no such thing.
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I won't let those ghetto masters beat us.
You need to be the penis master.
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Got it?
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Don't fret, girls.
The first time is never easy.
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There's no need for any stress,
pleasure is like a blast wave
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that spreads
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throughout
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your body.
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And we begin.
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Women
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are like a beautiful flower.
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Give them your fertilizer
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and they bloom.
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Should I be hearing this, Dad?
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Cover your ears, honey.
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Pablito won't help me.
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I don't know how to post online.
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You're the brains in the family, honey.
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You'll be successful when you grow up.
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Come on, post it!
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-What's that sound?
-You got some comments.
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Read them to me.
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From @titillo.
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"What foods turn women on?"
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From @anonymous.
"Am I gay if I dream about penises?"
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From @billy-goat.
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"My wife complains
because my joystick is broken."
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His joystick?
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Well…
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I'll explain later, honey.
These poor earthlings need my help.
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Film me again, honey.
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Dear Titillo, potato tlacoyos work for me.
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And you, billy-goat,
don't let her pressure you.
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If you really can't get it up,
save your honor by running away.
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Follow me on @penismaster for more advice.
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What's this filth?
131
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You crossed a line, Leo.
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What?
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All night I heard you howling.
134
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Is that any example to set for the girls?
135
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Lovemaking must be silent.
That's what pillows are for.
136
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That's what the nuns said.
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Lots of women think
some pleasure is a sin.
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All pleasure is sinful,
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except my potato tlacoyos.
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Of course not, Mom, please.
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Haven't you had an orgasm?
142
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That tingling in your tlacoyo?
143
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Blessed Virgin!
144
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Alright then, show me a nice toy.
145
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This is the Uh, Ah, Maxi Sensations.
146
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Comes with ten speeds
and three kinds of vibrations.
147
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You can use it
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underwater.
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Great.
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00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:57,478
And to ensure your business
gets off on the right foot,
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I'll take the she-devil costume too.
152
00:07:59,605 --> 00:08:02,107
How about some body gloss?
153
00:08:02,191 --> 00:08:03,859
-What for?
-It makes you glow.
154
00:08:03,943 --> 00:08:07,363
Come on, Tere. I don't need
to glow in the dark like a UFO.
155
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You won't regret your purchase.
156
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No returns or exchanges, of course.
Enjoy your new toy.
157
00:08:17,206 --> 00:08:19,416
Georgie, did you order that?
158
00:08:19,500 --> 00:08:20,626
No!
159
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What is it?
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00:08:22,503 --> 00:08:25,047
-It's your order, Yolis.
-I didn't buy that!
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00:08:26,966 --> 00:08:28,884
So please leave my house.
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You!
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Get inside!
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There are always ups and downs.
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Maybe, your spandex put the off.
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It's for biking the deliveries.
167
00:08:46,318 --> 00:08:48,153
Maybe it's the wrong packaging?
168
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I can see why someone might be obsessed.
169
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I mean offended
170
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by that package.
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Give it to me, baby.
172
00:09:02,793 --> 00:09:06,589
Sure, Crystal. The every people love you.
173
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You are so big and handsome.
174
00:09:10,718 --> 00:09:12,928
Funny, so to end the interview.
175
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Tell me, why Mexico?
176
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What you tell me us?
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Yeah, baby.
178
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Give it to me hard.
179
00:09:21,604 --> 00:09:25,107
What are you doing?
Why are you interviewing a sex doll?
180
00:09:25,190 --> 00:09:26,317
Here's why.
181
00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:29,403
I got 100 followers in 12 hours.
182
00:09:29,486 --> 00:09:33,532
In a month, man!
I'll be the king of North Korea.
183
00:09:33,616 --> 00:09:36,368
The Chinese get turned on
by the weirdest things.
184
00:09:36,452 --> 00:09:38,287
They even have cartoon porn.
185
00:09:38,871 --> 00:09:39,955
Wentai?
186
00:09:40,039 --> 00:09:42,333
Pablo, not all Asians are Chinese.
187
00:09:42,875 --> 00:09:45,461
The comments I read are South Korean.
188
00:09:45,544 --> 00:09:48,672
And the Japanese invented hentai.
189
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PLEASE REMOVE THOSE VIDEOS!
190
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It's from the neighbor.
191
00:09:54,303 --> 00:09:56,430
Let me finish editing this first.
192
00:10:03,562 --> 00:10:05,064
Do you notice nothing?
193
00:10:05,147 --> 00:10:08,609
I've been waiting all day.
Everything hurts, including my pride.
194
00:10:08,692 --> 00:10:13,238
I even got the tantric chair
to practice the Shiva position for you.
195
00:10:13,322 --> 00:10:15,866
I hurt my right knee with my backhand.
196
00:10:18,077 --> 00:10:19,078
Yeah?
197
00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:22,164
I don't care.
198
00:10:26,627 --> 00:10:30,964
Boy, do I have a treat for you,
a massage with a happy-ending.
199
00:10:34,802 --> 00:10:36,178
Wasn't it the right knee?
200
00:10:38,597 --> 00:10:39,640
How dare you?
201
00:10:39,723 --> 00:10:42,643
Calm down, I hate doing it in the daytime.
202
00:10:42,726 --> 00:10:44,561
I'm sick of the tantric stuff.
203
00:10:46,271 --> 00:10:49,483
Remember that night on our honeymoon?
204
00:10:50,359 --> 00:10:51,485
In the pool?
205
00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:56,490
How could I forget? You outdid yourself.
206
00:10:57,074 --> 00:10:58,867
That was legendary!
207
00:10:59,827 --> 00:11:01,078
Let's do it again.
208
00:11:03,539 --> 00:11:04,373
Tonight.
209
00:11:05,207 --> 00:11:06,583
We've got a date.
210
00:11:08,293 --> 00:11:09,211
These people!
211
00:11:09,294 --> 00:11:11,839
I knew we should charge for cancellations.
212
00:11:11,922 --> 00:11:14,174
The transparent plastic bags reveal
213
00:11:14,758 --> 00:11:16,510
the hypocrisy of rich peoples.
214
00:11:16,593 --> 00:11:18,887
The guilt makes them bad lovers.
215
00:11:18,971 --> 00:11:20,139
How would you know?
216
00:11:20,764 --> 00:11:22,766
How many rich guys have you been with?
217
00:11:26,603 --> 00:11:27,604
I can't tell you,
218
00:11:28,397 --> 00:11:31,650
because you'll want
to know all the details.
219
00:11:31,734 --> 00:11:32,901
Is that a problem?
220
00:11:34,153 --> 00:11:36,196
It would violate my employee contract.
221
00:11:38,657 --> 00:11:40,951
But trust me, I know from experience.
222
00:11:45,914 --> 00:11:47,124
Inhale.
223
00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:49,042
Exhale.
224
00:11:49,752 --> 00:11:50,627
Very good.
225
00:11:51,420 --> 00:11:55,758
I always recommend
asking permission before entering.
226
00:11:55,841 --> 00:11:56,717
May I enter?
227
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:58,927
So, we say, "May I come in?"
228
00:11:59,011 --> 00:11:59,970
May I come in?
229
00:12:00,471 --> 00:12:03,474
It feels like we do have permission.
230
00:12:03,557 --> 00:12:08,145
Don't forget to inhale and experience
a universe of possibilities.
231
00:12:09,271 --> 00:12:10,105
Damn!
232
00:12:21,492 --> 00:12:25,579
-How did you get in?
-Dude! Locking the door is so tacky.
233
00:12:26,163 --> 00:12:27,372
Why are you doing this?
234
00:12:27,456 --> 00:12:31,502
The whole school thinks
we're dating because of your videos.
235
00:12:31,585 --> 00:12:33,629
They call me "Chaca Cris."
236
00:12:33,712 --> 00:12:34,838
Like Chaca.
237
00:12:35,464 --> 00:12:37,925
Get it? They think
I look like that sex doll.
238
00:12:38,550 --> 00:12:42,763
But isn't Mariana your BFF?
She nicknamed you that.
239
00:12:44,014 --> 00:12:48,310
I don't know what's up with your friends,
but I'll keep posting for my thousands
240
00:12:48,393 --> 00:12:50,604
of followers in one of the Koreas.
241
00:12:50,687 --> 00:12:53,941
I need followers,
including you and your friends.
242
00:13:09,373 --> 00:13:10,958
-Ready?
-Yes.
243
00:13:13,752 --> 00:13:16,630
Damn, you temptress! That's smoking!
244
00:13:16,713 --> 00:13:18,090
Let's do it, baby!
245
00:13:18,715 --> 00:13:19,550
Come, my love.
246
00:13:21,093 --> 00:13:21,969
That's it.
247
00:13:22,553 --> 00:13:23,554
-Wait.
-What?
248
00:13:23,637 --> 00:13:25,973
-Let me go on top.
-Okay. Whatever you want.
249
00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:28,433
-Ready?
-Yes.
250
00:13:28,517 --> 00:13:30,519
-Like that?
-Grab my butt, honey.
251
00:13:30,602 --> 00:13:31,436
Yes.
252
00:13:31,520 --> 00:13:32,354
Grab me hard.
253
00:13:39,027 --> 00:13:41,738
-What wrong?
-I've never been with a she-devil.
254
00:13:45,617 --> 00:13:46,451
No problem.
255
00:13:46,535 --> 00:13:48,996
I have something we can play with.
256
00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:54,334
What are you up to? I'm not into that.
257
00:13:54,418 --> 00:13:56,753
It's not for you, dummy.
258
00:13:56,837 --> 00:14:01,758
Sure, I gave you so much pleasure,
now you need not one, but two.
259
00:14:01,842 --> 00:14:03,051
Stop it, honey.
260
00:14:05,512 --> 00:14:07,014
I just wanted to try it.
261
00:14:07,097 --> 00:14:08,849
But it seems too much
262
00:14:08,932 --> 00:14:10,559
for the penis mother,
263
00:14:10,642 --> 00:14:12,144
or whatever you're called.
264
00:14:13,937 --> 00:14:15,022
Penis master.
265
00:14:18,442 --> 00:14:21,403
-We should've done this ages ago.
-Right.
266
00:14:21,486 --> 00:14:25,407
-The tantra thing is so lame.
-And we won't mess up the house.
267
00:14:25,490 --> 00:14:27,701
Mess me up all you want, babe!
268
00:14:31,246 --> 00:14:32,164
Serious?
269
00:14:32,247 --> 00:14:33,749
Are you ready?
270
00:14:40,422 --> 00:14:41,381
Come here.
271
00:14:44,968 --> 00:14:47,220
I love you, Ernesto!
272
00:14:49,514 --> 00:14:50,807
I love it!
273
00:14:51,391 --> 00:14:52,476
Yes!
274
00:14:52,559 --> 00:14:53,393
That bitch!
275
00:14:53,477 --> 00:14:55,687
Take me, Ernesto!
276
00:14:59,483 --> 00:15:01,234
I haven't done anything, my love.
277
00:15:02,486 --> 00:15:03,320
What's up?
278
00:15:05,364 --> 00:15:07,407
Swimming in your underwear?
279
00:15:09,076 --> 00:15:10,369
Shall we go, honey?
280
00:15:10,953 --> 00:15:12,204
Yes, off you go.
281
00:15:12,287 --> 00:15:15,207
And take your racket back to your house.
282
00:15:15,290 --> 00:15:16,208
Wait!
283
00:15:16,291 --> 00:15:18,251
Look who's talking.
284
00:15:18,335 --> 00:15:20,671
The nympho who howls like a cat in heat.
285
00:15:20,754 --> 00:15:24,257
But I don't mess up
other people's pools to have fun.
286
00:15:24,341 --> 00:15:27,386
Have fun with that ape you call a husband?
287
00:15:27,469 --> 00:15:30,555
At least my ape gets it up.
Yours lost his banana.
288
00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:32,683
No offense, neighbor.
289
00:15:32,766 --> 00:15:34,434
I'm coming!
290
00:15:34,518 --> 00:15:36,311
Where are the intruders?
291
00:15:36,395 --> 00:15:40,399
-Right here, committing lewd acts.
-No we're not.
292
00:15:40,482 --> 00:15:43,068
-We'll get them out.
-Mom?
293
00:15:43,151 --> 00:15:46,363
-No. We're fine.
-This is a private pool. Please!
294
00:15:49,908 --> 00:15:52,160
I left Crystal here. What happened?
295
00:15:55,497 --> 00:15:56,331
What?
296
00:15:58,750 --> 00:16:00,669
DELETE THE TIK TOKS OR CRYSTAL DIES!
297
00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:02,796
That bitch!
298
00:16:03,630 --> 00:16:06,133
That damn rich kid! Rich girl?
299
00:16:06,216 --> 00:16:08,719
That damn rich chick
will not ruin my doll.
300
00:16:09,886 --> 00:16:12,889
No, Uncle. We'll rescue Crystal, trust me.
301
00:16:14,558 --> 00:16:17,060
Quickie. I want a quickie.
302
00:16:18,603 --> 00:16:20,647
We are here with your Quickie order.
303
00:16:22,983 --> 00:16:24,943
What? I didn't buy anything.
304
00:16:27,446 --> 00:16:30,240
It's the new seven-speed blender
305
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:33,285
for anything that needs a good stir.
306
00:16:35,328 --> 00:16:36,997
Yes, of course!
307
00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:38,957
Yes, I did order this.
308
00:16:39,583 --> 00:16:40,417
Thank you.
309
00:16:48,467 --> 00:16:52,345
We don't need to be
so corny over our first sale.
310
00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:03,065
HOW DO I SEDUCE MY NEIGHBOR?
SHE'S A CRESCENT AND I'M A FULL MOON.
311
00:17:03,899 --> 00:17:05,942
-You order a pizza?
-No.
312
00:17:06,026 --> 00:17:08,195
With big hot luscious sausage?
313
00:17:08,278 --> 00:17:09,362
Sure you did.
314
00:17:09,446 --> 00:17:13,492
No. Listen to me.
What address did they give you?
315
00:17:13,575 --> 00:17:14,493
Yours.
316
00:17:14,576 --> 00:17:15,994
You're quite self-assured.
317
00:17:19,122 --> 00:17:20,457
Blessed Virgin!
318
00:17:24,252 --> 00:17:27,839
No! Wait a minute! Mom!
319
00:17:27,923 --> 00:17:29,216
Mom!
320
00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:31,927
Mom! Stop it. I mean it.
321
00:17:32,010 --> 00:17:33,136
I'm serious.
322
00:17:33,637 --> 00:17:34,763
What's the matter?
323
00:17:36,306 --> 00:17:37,974
What have you done, blondie?
324
00:17:38,058 --> 00:17:40,811
I wouldn't be like that if I were you.
325
00:17:41,686 --> 00:17:45,941
I'll post it on the neighborhood chat.
This makes us equal for the pool thing.
326
00:17:46,024 --> 00:17:50,028
You brought that on yourself
with your fake porn show.
327
00:17:50,112 --> 00:17:53,573
You had a fling with that kid
because you can't get any at home.
328
00:17:54,241 --> 00:17:57,536
Mention Rober again
and this goes to your husband.
329
00:17:57,619 --> 00:17:59,412
You don't have his number.
330
00:17:59,496 --> 00:18:02,332
I'm on the security board.
I have all of them.
331
00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:03,583
You wouldn't dare.
332
00:18:03,667 --> 00:18:06,628
You have a video
that could ruin my marriage.
333
00:18:07,212 --> 00:18:10,340
I'll trade the stripper for Rober.
What do you say?
334
00:18:11,675 --> 00:18:14,469
Ridiculous! I can deal with Genaro.
335
00:18:14,553 --> 00:18:16,263
But to show you I don't care,
336
00:18:17,222 --> 00:18:18,473
I'll give back your yard.
337
00:18:18,557 --> 00:18:19,808
Don't you miss it?
338
00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:25,939
All right!
339
00:18:26,022 --> 00:18:27,691
I'll delete it myself.
340
00:18:27,774 --> 00:18:29,359
There. Oh, no!
341
00:18:29,442 --> 00:18:30,861
What have I done?
342
00:18:30,944 --> 00:18:32,320
Delete it!
343
00:18:35,740 --> 00:18:38,285
You sent it to Gerardo and the neighbors!
344
00:18:38,368 --> 00:18:40,537
My husband's name is Genaro!
345
00:18:41,580 --> 00:18:44,166
Whatever! G is for ghetto!
346
00:18:44,249 --> 00:18:45,083
Fuck you!
347
00:18:46,084 --> 00:18:47,002
Get out!
348
00:18:47,085 --> 00:18:48,128
Scram!
349
00:18:48,211 --> 00:18:49,212
I can't do this.
350
00:18:50,422 --> 00:18:52,382
Silvia's pressuring me with the tantra
351
00:18:52,465 --> 00:18:55,886
even though I took your advice
about running away.
352
00:18:55,969 --> 00:19:01,183
-You're @billygoat?
-Yes, if only I were @penismaster.
353
00:19:01,266 --> 00:19:03,727
-It's not that easy, Neto.
-No?
354
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:08,273
I turned Leonor into a sex addict.
Now, I'm not good enough for her.
355
00:19:08,356 --> 00:19:10,984
If you're not good enough, who is?
356
00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:14,863
Don't you feel
like you can't fail even once?
357
00:19:15,530 --> 00:19:19,117
Yes, do you feel like
you need to be a sex machine?
358
00:19:19,201 --> 00:19:21,745
Yes, that's it exactly, Neto!
359
00:19:21,828 --> 00:19:24,873
It's not fair. We need to be free.
360
00:19:25,540 --> 00:19:27,000
Like my granddad used to say,
361
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:29,544
"Let your work mind sleep,
362
00:19:30,378 --> 00:19:32,756
to awaken the mind of pleasure."
363
00:19:34,049 --> 00:19:36,384
That's what I'll do with Silvia!
364
00:19:36,468 --> 00:19:40,180
You're the best thing that's happened
to the local guys, come here.
365
00:19:57,906 --> 00:19:59,532
Move on my signal, over.
366
00:20:00,242 --> 00:20:01,159
Copy that, kid.
367
00:20:03,745 --> 00:20:07,082
You by air and me by land
with all we've got, over.
368
00:20:07,165 --> 00:20:10,669
Operation Bird Returns to Nest
starts now, over.
369
00:20:10,752 --> 00:20:11,586
Wait.
370
00:20:12,963 --> 00:20:14,172
If anything happens…
371
00:20:16,549 --> 00:20:17,759
we had a good run.
372
00:20:20,637 --> 00:20:22,264
-Cheers, baby.
-Cheers.
373
00:20:22,973 --> 00:20:25,934
Aren't you gonna congratulate me properly.
374
00:20:26,685 --> 00:20:29,104
But, of course, I will.
375
00:20:29,187 --> 00:20:30,814
-Yes?
-You deserve
376
00:20:30,897 --> 00:20:32,065
a super…
377
00:20:34,109 --> 00:20:35,193
massage.
378
00:20:37,279 --> 00:20:38,113
Okay.
379
00:20:41,950 --> 00:20:43,994
I missed you, baby.
380
00:20:54,129 --> 00:20:56,381
Want me to strip like that stripper?
381
00:20:58,174 --> 00:21:01,094
That slut sent him. It was a trap.
382
00:21:01,177 --> 00:21:02,053
Sure.
383
00:21:03,096 --> 00:21:05,724
What are you mad about?
You smell like a strip club.
384
00:21:06,766 --> 00:21:10,145
I know you go and ignore
the strippers when you feel down.
385
00:21:11,688 --> 00:21:15,317
I never complain
because I always put you first.
386
00:21:16,484 --> 00:21:18,320
That's the problem, Genaro.
387
00:21:22,282 --> 00:21:23,867
I need to tell you
388
00:21:24,951 --> 00:21:28,371
what I like or not in bed,
but it doesn't undermine you.
389
00:21:29,998 --> 00:21:33,418
Like that wrestler mask you love.
390
00:21:33,501 --> 00:21:34,961
The Rey Mysterio mask?
391
00:21:35,545 --> 00:21:36,379
That one.
392
00:21:36,463 --> 00:21:38,590
It's a total turn-off.
393
00:21:39,174 --> 00:21:41,134
-I'll get rid of it.
-Really?
394
00:21:44,095 --> 00:21:46,556
Forgive me for not asking,
my little devil.
395
00:21:47,599 --> 00:21:49,309
-But I'm ready now.
-You are?
396
00:21:49,392 --> 00:21:51,019
What do you want me to do?
397
00:21:51,102 --> 00:21:51,936
Anything?
398
00:21:52,729 --> 00:21:55,857
Well, for starters, penis master,
why don't we try…
399
00:21:56,858 --> 00:21:57,692
wait a sec.
400
00:21:58,193 --> 00:22:00,695
How about trying this out? Come on.
401
00:22:03,323 --> 00:22:05,909
Rich people need so much to get turned on.
402
00:22:05,992 --> 00:22:07,577
-Don't you?
-Me?
403
00:22:08,870 --> 00:22:10,080
This is all I need.
404
00:22:14,584 --> 00:22:18,171
"Dear Rich Kid,
tell your girl you love her style,
405
00:22:18,254 --> 00:22:20,673
and she will open up her flower to you."
406
00:22:25,678 --> 00:22:26,846
Are you okay?
407
00:22:28,056 --> 00:22:29,057
I love your flower!
408
00:22:30,475 --> 00:22:33,770
I mean, your personality,
the flower in all of us.
409
00:22:35,772 --> 00:22:40,735
I'm not some player who fools around.
All I care about is in here.
410
00:22:41,528 --> 00:22:42,779
And here.
411
00:22:45,073 --> 00:22:46,199
Can I smell your hair?
412
00:22:47,784 --> 00:22:48,785
Okay.
413
00:22:48,868 --> 00:22:49,702
Yes?
414
00:22:54,416 --> 00:22:55,291
It smells nice.
415
00:22:55,792 --> 00:22:56,626
Thanks.
416
00:22:57,460 --> 00:23:00,296
Can I see your boobs? Just one.
417
00:23:00,380 --> 00:23:01,464
Just be quiet.
418
00:23:06,803 --> 00:23:09,681
I'm chafed. I haven't ridden
my bike since I was eight.
419
00:23:09,764 --> 00:23:11,141
But I can do it.
420
00:23:12,809 --> 00:23:14,102
Baby.
421
00:23:17,272 --> 00:23:19,399
Baby, you turn me on.
422
00:23:19,983 --> 00:23:21,359
You deserve everything.
423
00:23:21,985 --> 00:23:23,403
You're on fire, baby.
424
00:23:25,321 --> 00:23:26,990
We'll never leave this room.
425
00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:34,914
Baby.
426
00:23:38,626 --> 00:23:40,044
You're on fire, baby.
427
00:23:47,594 --> 00:23:48,428
Yes!
428
00:23:51,806 --> 00:23:53,391
Beatriz!
429
00:23:57,270 --> 00:23:58,354
Silvia!
430
00:24:01,107 --> 00:24:02,192
Unbelievable!
431
00:24:03,234 --> 00:24:07,155
If I were Beatriz, I'd be dead,
and you'd be a necrophile.
432
00:24:07,238 --> 00:24:09,073
Just ignore me, my love.
433
00:24:09,157 --> 00:24:11,242
That was just a very dumb mistake.
434
00:24:11,326 --> 00:24:13,119
Seeing the tree crossed my wires.
435
00:24:13,203 --> 00:24:15,330
Living with the ghost of a woman
436
00:24:15,413 --> 00:24:19,250
who choked on the host
at her son's baptism is too much.
437
00:24:19,334 --> 00:24:21,252
You make me the happiest man alive.
438
00:24:21,336 --> 00:24:23,379
Please, let me go.
439
00:24:23,880 --> 00:24:24,714
Bye.
440
00:24:30,845 --> 00:24:32,472
Something's burning, right?
441
00:24:33,806 --> 00:24:35,058
I'm burning up for you.
442
00:24:37,435 --> 00:24:38,686
No! Dude!
443
00:24:40,396 --> 00:24:41,231
I mean it.
444
00:24:45,026 --> 00:24:45,860
No way!
445
00:24:49,948 --> 00:24:51,616
This huge house
446
00:24:52,367 --> 00:24:54,911
can't take a little smoke?
447
00:24:55,954 --> 00:24:56,829
Lord!
448
00:24:58,081 --> 00:25:02,335
-What's going on, Mom?
-I just tried out the charcoal stove.
449
00:25:04,295 --> 00:25:06,881
Okay, be more careful next time.
450
00:25:06,965 --> 00:25:09,259
You better watch it too.
451
00:25:12,720 --> 00:25:15,890
-What now?
-Are you Satan himself now, Leo?
452
00:25:16,641 --> 00:25:19,769
Your beloved Genaro loves it
and I love it even more.
453
00:25:20,395 --> 00:25:24,190
Mom, you taught me
some weird ideas about sex.
454
00:25:24,274 --> 00:25:27,193
I only taught you what I was taught.
455
00:25:28,945 --> 00:25:30,363
We must be respectable.
456
00:25:31,781 --> 00:25:32,907
Yes, Mom.
457
00:25:32,991 --> 00:25:35,034
I know you had the best intentions.
458
00:25:35,118 --> 00:25:37,704
And now that I respect myself,
459
00:25:37,787 --> 00:25:40,498
I learned to ask and not just give.
460
00:25:40,582 --> 00:25:43,334
Being a mischievous she-devil
isn't all bad.
461
00:25:43,418 --> 00:25:45,503
You should try it sometime.
462
00:25:47,046 --> 00:25:47,880
I love you.
463
00:25:51,467 --> 00:25:52,552
Target located.
464
00:25:54,596 --> 00:25:56,264
Careful, Uncle! It's Crista!
465
00:26:02,478 --> 00:26:03,855
DELETE THE TIK TOKS
466
00:26:04,772 --> 00:26:05,607
No!
467
00:26:09,902 --> 00:26:12,363
GHETTO QUEEN CRISTA
468
00:26:12,447 --> 00:26:13,615
No way!
469
00:26:16,784 --> 00:26:18,411
You hideous doll!
470
00:26:18,995 --> 00:26:20,705
You're always right.
471
00:26:42,101 --> 00:26:45,271
Why are you cutting down
that beautiful tree?
472
00:26:45,355 --> 00:26:46,606
No!
473
00:26:46,689 --> 00:26:47,607
Wow.
474
00:26:47,690 --> 00:26:51,861
It's a reminder that all my husband
can think of is his dead wife!
475
00:26:55,281 --> 00:26:56,991
He called me Beatriz in bed.
476
00:26:58,076 --> 00:27:00,161
After months of not touching me.
477
00:27:01,579 --> 00:27:03,456
I feel like such an asshole.
478
00:27:04,082 --> 00:27:06,584
Hey, don't call yourself that.
479
00:27:12,173 --> 00:27:16,219
-We all mess up once in a while.
-Except you and your penis master.
480
00:27:16,302 --> 00:27:20,682
Before those yoga classes,
the truth is I never…
481
00:27:21,683 --> 00:27:23,976
I never felt like I do today.
482
00:27:25,728 --> 00:27:28,064
Don't live in anybody's shadow.
483
00:27:29,023 --> 00:27:30,108
You come first.
484
00:27:30,191 --> 00:27:33,361
That's what I learned since I moved here.
485
00:27:49,335 --> 00:27:51,879
That damn Pablo was right!
486
00:27:52,714 --> 00:27:54,549
I have the worst friends ever!
487
00:27:56,676 --> 00:27:58,678
Pablo is my only true friend.
488
00:27:59,220 --> 00:28:00,555
You're awesome!
489
00:28:01,931 --> 00:28:03,141
You're great!
490
00:28:06,436 --> 00:28:08,271
You're perfect!
491
00:28:10,356 --> 00:28:12,734
No wonder these dolls sell so well.
492
00:28:15,236 --> 00:28:17,822
Uncle! Stop! Get out of there!
493
00:28:19,365 --> 00:28:21,284
Pablo, what's wrong with you?
494
00:28:21,367 --> 00:28:23,578
Do we enter the rich girl's room?
495
00:28:25,413 --> 00:28:26,831
Pablo? Answer me.
496
00:28:28,958 --> 00:28:31,335
Damn family of perverts!
497
00:28:32,336 --> 00:28:33,171
Hey!
498
00:28:33,755 --> 00:28:34,797
Unbelievable!
499
00:28:35,757 --> 00:28:37,258
What are you doing there?
500
00:28:37,341 --> 00:28:38,426
Hi, Mom.
501
00:28:41,053 --> 00:28:44,015
A penis master doesn't like to brag
502
00:28:44,515 --> 00:28:45,975
Anyone can do it, right?
503
00:28:47,310 --> 00:28:49,353
The thing that's hard for everyone…
504
00:28:52,398 --> 00:28:53,858
is talking to your partner.
505
00:28:54,358 --> 00:28:56,903
There's always something
we don't want to hear.
506
00:28:58,488 --> 00:29:00,198
So, be prepared, guys.
507
00:29:01,073 --> 00:29:04,118
Because change is hard, but possible.
508
00:29:05,453 --> 00:29:08,164
We can't go around only pleasing others.
509
00:29:09,040 --> 00:29:12,293
First you need to know
what makes you happy,
510
00:29:12,376 --> 00:29:14,420
to know what makes them happy.
511
00:29:15,630 --> 00:29:19,091
If nobody has ever told you,
you have a natural talent,
512
00:29:19,175 --> 00:29:20,426
don't worry about it.
513
00:29:21,177 --> 00:29:23,554
Not everyone is great in bed like me.
514
00:31:59,961 --> 00:32:05,007
Subtitle translation by: Ricardo Espinoza