1 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:07,876 ‎歡迎來到天堂 2 00:00:07,966 --> 00:00:11,386 ‎不用找豪花飯店,在專屬空間 3 00:00:11,469 --> 00:00:13,299 ‎與當地居民同住 4 00:00:13,388 --> 00:00:16,808 ‎品嘗墨西哥大廚親手做的墨式美食 5 00:00:16,891 --> 00:00:20,981 ‎騎著驢子探索宜人的道地社區 6 00:00:21,646 --> 00:00:23,816 ‎將臉彩繪成墨西哥骷露頭 7 00:00:24,607 --> 00:00:29,277 ‎享受火熱的騷沙舞課程及美妙小夜曲 8 00:00:31,406 --> 00:00:33,406 ‎墨西哥版的比佛利山莊 9 00:00:34,325 --> 00:00:36,235 ‎靠近宏偉壯麗的大教堂 10 00:00:36,327 --> 00:00:37,997 ‎金子塔近在咫尺 11 00:00:38,079 --> 00:00:39,829 ‎還有漂亮原始的大致然 12 00:00:39,914 --> 00:00:40,794 ‎我身處人間嗎? 13 00:00:40,874 --> 00:00:41,964 ‎當然 14 00:00:42,917 --> 00:00:43,787 ‎但我置身天堂 15 00:00:45,837 --> 00:00:50,047 ‎-你沒學過英文嗎? ‎-簡直比胡埃德瑞托還慘 16 00:00:50,133 --> 00:00:52,343 ‎妳跟谷歌誰比較厲害? 17 00:00:52,427 --> 00:00:53,847 ‎谷歌明顯獲勝 18 00:00:53,928 --> 00:00:58,268 ‎我討厭搞什麼“茗宿” ‎我們靠賣墨西哥捲餅就能付帳單了 19 00:00:58,349 --> 00:01:03,979 ‎警衛和園丁訂了很多 ‎家庭幫傭訂更多 20 00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:06,194 ‎雖然她們老是學雇主減肥 21 00:01:06,274 --> 00:01:10,114 ‎我贊同帕布羅的想法 ‎我們可以找個美國寄宿生 22 00:01:10,195 --> 00:01:14,025 ‎他們很酷,而且付美金 23 00:01:14,115 --> 00:01:18,945 ‎我同意媽媽的想法 ‎民宿只會使城市貧民化,造成貧窮 24 00:01:19,037 --> 00:01:22,707 ‎但這不是不正經的生意 ‎不像私下販售墨西哥捲餅 25 00:01:22,791 --> 00:01:24,921 ‎看到沒?我們跟毒販沒兩樣 26 00:01:25,001 --> 00:01:27,551 ‎妳跟隔壁鄰居協議好了 ‎現在想賠掉院子嗎? 27 00:01:27,629 --> 00:01:30,549 ‎不是,所以我們才要這麼小聲 28 00:01:30,632 --> 00:01:34,342 ‎別管什麼民宿和捲餅 ‎我現在有工作了 29 00:01:34,427 --> 00:01:37,597 ‎我在尼托的事務所當創意編輯 ‎是他們的頂尖員工 30 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:41,430 ‎非常好,老公,拿袋子裝辣椒 31 00:01:41,518 --> 00:01:45,728 ‎-十號永遠不會失敗 ‎-我們需要錢,快點 32 00:01:48,024 --> 00:01:50,574 ‎該死,我們太吵了嗎? 33 00:01:51,152 --> 00:01:53,242 ‎-一定是瑞秋 ‎-誰? 34 00:01:54,197 --> 00:01:59,037 ‎好啦,我把我們家放在民宿網上 ‎那是第一位入住的客人 35 00:02:01,037 --> 00:02:02,247 ‎歡迎妳,瑞秋… 36 00:02:02,330 --> 00:02:05,040 ‎沒有瑞秋這個人,我用了假帳號 37 00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:06,375 ‎妳幹嘛這樣? 38 00:02:06,459 --> 00:02:10,299 ‎我急需要地方躲,我媽瘋了 39 00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:14,131 ‎-我的房間在哪? ‎-樓上 40 00:02:14,217 --> 00:02:15,797 ‎我來幫妳 41 00:02:19,597 --> 00:02:22,477 ‎妳在做什麼?院子會拱手讓人的 42 00:02:22,559 --> 00:02:26,809 ‎自從我每天早上不敲鑼之後 ‎運氣就差到不行 43 00:02:26,896 --> 00:02:30,976 ‎我的車子被上車輪鎖 ‎你還不接我的電話 44 00:02:31,776 --> 00:02:34,196 ‎這是怎樣?你幹嘛把嘴貼住? 45 00:02:34,279 --> 00:02:36,739 ‎這樣我們才不會失去院子 ‎我們打球時太常大吼大叫 46 00:02:36,823 --> 00:02:37,743 ‎我不管 47 00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:41,914 ‎你們不知道不賄賂他們 ‎罰單有多難繳 48 00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,655 ‎我的手機沒電,提款機沒現鈔 49 00:02:44,747 --> 00:02:47,627 ‎鞋跟還斷了,連普奇都怪裡怪氣的 50 00:02:48,459 --> 00:02:50,919 ‎都是那個計程車司機的錯 51 00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:53,384 ‎沒有什麼厄運之說 ‎全都是腦袋想出來的 52 00:02:54,215 --> 00:02:57,465 ‎佛陀無視有害之人 53 00:02:57,552 --> 00:02:59,722 ‎等你們心存正念時,我們再來談 54 00:02:59,804 --> 00:03:02,934 ‎來得好不如來得巧吧? 55 00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:05,056 ‎你們都一起吃飯嗎? 56 00:03:05,143 --> 00:03:07,563 ‎不拿手機或平板? 57 00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:10,057 ‎太奇怪了 58 00:03:10,148 --> 00:03:12,568 ‎不是每個人都有寬螢幕手機 59 00:03:12,650 --> 00:03:14,440 ‎-也對啦 ‎-有的話就好了 60 00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:17,447 ‎-滿嘴食物還講話? ‎-少裝模作樣了 61 00:03:17,530 --> 00:03:18,490 ‎閉嘴 62 00:03:18,573 --> 00:03:21,163 ‎-別裝模作樣 ‎-注意措辭 63 00:03:21,242 --> 00:03:22,412 ‎閉嘴 64 00:03:23,077 --> 00:03:25,747 ‎珍妮,不要玩食物,通通給我冷靜點 65 00:03:25,830 --> 00:03:30,250 ‎這孩子要跟我們說 ‎她怎麼從隔壁的豪宅 66 00:03:30,335 --> 00:03:31,535 ‎搬來民宿的 67 00:03:31,628 --> 00:03:35,378 ‎好,我想成為獨立的女性 68 00:03:35,465 --> 00:03:38,255 ‎卡塔不會幫我鋪一輩子的床 69 00:03:38,343 --> 00:03:40,723 ‎我發誓,我不曉得怎麼鋪床 70 00:03:41,304 --> 00:03:46,104 ‎床單有分有鬆緊帶和沒有的 ‎搞什麼? 71 00:03:46,184 --> 00:03:49,404 ‎對,讓人搞不清楚,而且顏色都一樣 72 00:03:49,479 --> 00:03:51,859 ‎-沒錯 ‎-為什麼選這裡? 73 00:03:51,940 --> 00:03:56,780 ‎因為這裡離什麼都近 ‎我的健身房、瑜珈課 74 00:03:56,861 --> 00:03:58,611 ‎我的彼拉提斯、我的司機 75 00:03:58,696 --> 00:04:02,826 ‎妳做了最佳選擇,我們提供頂級服務 76 00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:04,739 ‎晚餐只要跟我點 77 00:04:04,827 --> 00:04:07,997 ‎我們真正的墨西哥大廚 ‎就會馬上準備好 78 00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:10,921 ‎謝謝妳,女士,但我從不吃晚餐 79 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:14,000 ‎我在進行間歇式斷食法 ‎7點過後不進食 80 00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:17,417 ‎-妳媽呢? ‎-她早上10點後就不吃東西了 81 00:04:17,507 --> 00:04:18,627 ‎什麼? 82 00:04:18,716 --> 00:04:23,296 ‎但我完全了解 ‎到她那年紀,怎樣都會胖到屁股 83 00:04:24,389 --> 00:04:25,519 ‎我沒別的意思 84 00:04:25,598 --> 00:04:28,598 ‎妳媽對妳住在這裡有什麼想法? 85 00:04:29,185 --> 00:04:32,185 ‎她不知道,拜託別告訴她我在這 86 00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:34,402 ‎也別跟她說我吃玉米捲餅配麵包 87 00:04:34,482 --> 00:04:35,572 ‎為什麼? 88 00:04:37,193 --> 00:04:39,743 ‎因為那熱量有500卡 89 00:04:40,947 --> 00:04:45,237 ‎她覺得我是米蟲,無法靠自己活下去 90 00:04:45,326 --> 00:04:46,326 ‎我當然可以 91 00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:47,871 ‎我現在就在求生存 92 00:04:50,039 --> 00:04:51,749 ‎抱歉,你們會說英文嗎? 93 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:55,213 ‎當然可以,要說什麼呢? 94 00:04:58,423 --> 00:04:59,383 ‎她是間諜 95 00:04:59,465 --> 00:05:03,255 ‎還獨立咧?富二代都靠爸媽啊 96 00:05:03,845 --> 00:05:06,885 ‎他們會繼承家業、互相通婚 97 00:05:06,973 --> 00:05:10,353 ‎親愛的蕾歐 ‎不要又開始妳的陰謀論了 98 00:05:10,435 --> 00:05:13,895 ‎妳說過吸血獸是網路捏造的 99 00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:16,270 ‎可是阿姨就有看過吸血獸吞掉她的羊 100 00:05:16,357 --> 00:05:19,777 ‎不管你們信不信 ‎反正我們就是在打仗 101 00:05:19,861 --> 00:05:21,991 ‎不放聰明點,我們就輸了 102 00:05:22,071 --> 00:05:26,911 ‎這就像冷戰時期 ‎什麼事都是最高機密,以免被抓 103 00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:29,913 ‎墨西哥捲餅冷掉了,珍妮 104 00:05:30,496 --> 00:05:35,036 ‎席爾薇雅派她來害我們違規 ‎好佔領我們的後院 105 00:05:35,126 --> 00:05:37,086 ‎我們做捲餅就算違規了 106 00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:40,340 ‎但他們不知道這件事,兒子 ‎珍妮說的有道理 107 00:05:40,423 --> 00:05:43,633 ‎問題不在於誰違規,而是誰被抓到 108 00:05:43,718 --> 00:05:45,798 ‎-我同意,你們呢? ‎-不同意 109 00:05:45,887 --> 00:05:47,307 ‎不同意嗎?要來點嗎? 110 00:05:47,388 --> 00:05:51,178 ‎他們派了間諜過來 ‎那我們的間諜呢? 111 00:05:53,144 --> 00:05:56,274 ‎-捲餅還是要有人做 ‎-冷戰考試 112 00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:59,316 ‎-我要去找恩尼斯托 ‎-我要去找瑞秋 113 00:05:59,901 --> 00:06:02,531 ‎-我在訓練帕布羅玩輪盤 ‎-對 114 00:06:02,612 --> 00:06:03,452 ‎-沒錯 ‎-對 115 00:06:07,033 --> 00:06:08,283 ‎太好了 116 00:06:11,454 --> 00:06:13,414 ‎普奇,下床 117 00:06:13,498 --> 00:06:17,378 ‎這些通通都是低脂、有機、無麩質 118 00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:18,840 ‎非常感謝妳 119 00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:22,420 ‎-妳只帶這些東西來嗎? ‎-對,怎麼了? 120 00:06:23,925 --> 00:06:28,095 ‎我以為妳同一件衣服不會穿兩次 121 00:06:28,179 --> 00:06:30,599 ‎絕對不行,被人發現就慘了 122 00:06:31,265 --> 00:06:32,095 ‎好噁 123 00:06:32,809 --> 00:06:36,399 ‎-妳需要什麼,我都能回家幫妳拿 ‎-真的嗎? 124 00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:41,816 ‎我的白色古馳、黑色古馳 125 00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:43,691 ‎我的白色古馳靴子 126 00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:47,655 ‎對,我的露露檸檬運動褲和夾克 127 00:06:48,741 --> 00:06:51,911 ‎還有我的珊瑚粉洋裝 128 00:06:51,994 --> 00:06:55,424 ‎不是珠紅色,也不是鮮紅色的喔 129 00:06:55,498 --> 00:06:59,248 ‎我只要去年聖誕節穿的珊瑚粉洋裝 130 00:06:59,335 --> 00:07:00,165 ‎好 131 00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:01,673 ‎跟著我說 132 00:07:01,754 --> 00:07:03,804 ‎感謝上帝,很好,那你呢? 133 00:07:03,881 --> 00:07:05,171 ‎“很”你呢? 134 00:07:05,258 --> 00:07:09,298 ‎-這是:“感謝上帝,很好,你呢?” ‎-別鬧了 135 00:07:09,387 --> 00:07:13,097 ‎我是認真的 ‎跟著我說一遍,感謝上帝 136 00:07:14,851 --> 00:07:18,061 ‎不對,感覺要像喉嚨有卡東西 137 00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:26,901 ‎很好,你想工作,對吧? 138 00:07:28,072 --> 00:07:31,122 ‎那就重複唸到你會為止 139 00:07:31,826 --> 00:07:32,946 ‎這個客人就靠這句話了 140 00:07:37,874 --> 00:07:41,504 ‎差不多了,好,再來 141 00:07:42,086 --> 00:07:42,956 ‎莫伊塞蘇可里? 142 00:07:43,045 --> 00:07:46,375 ‎這是你的新身分 ‎你只要記住莫伊塞的背景 143 00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:49,636 ‎你的生活、飲食 144 00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:54,389 ‎作夢、拉屎都要跟莫伊塞一樣 145 00:07:55,057 --> 00:07:58,187 ‎簡納洛不存在了,你現在是莫伊塞 146 00:07:58,769 --> 00:08:02,609 ‎這個客戶只跟猶太人合作,你是誰? 147 00:08:02,690 --> 00:08:05,190 ‎-莫伊塞蘇可里 ‎-非常好 148 00:08:07,403 --> 00:08:08,913 ‎你的帽子,莫伊塞 149 00:08:09,530 --> 00:08:13,200 ‎就算洗澡也不能拿掉 150 00:08:13,784 --> 00:08:15,504 ‎感謝上帝 151 00:08:23,586 --> 00:08:25,206 ‎厄運消散 152 00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:34,763 ‎搞什麼 153 00:08:35,431 --> 00:08:37,981 ‎迪耶戈,安靜 154 00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:40,229 ‎這些青草是怎麼回事? 155 00:08:40,311 --> 00:08:44,481 ‎我們很需要淨化,不能再這樣下去了 156 00:08:44,565 --> 00:08:49,195 ‎瑪莎德瓦伊萊在網站上推薦這位薩滿 ‎而且她從不騙人 157 00:08:49,278 --> 00:08:50,108 ‎好 158 00:08:50,780 --> 00:08:53,120 ‎好,淨化夠了 159 00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:56,239 ‎卡塔,送他出去,謝謝 160 00:09:03,459 --> 00:09:06,169 ‎明天我要用雞蛋滾過全身 161 00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:10,174 ‎如果蛋是清的,我的氣場就恢復了 162 00:09:10,758 --> 00:09:13,338 ‎妳還需要什麼嗎? 163 00:09:13,427 --> 00:09:15,557 ‎把普奇帶走,我受夠牠了 164 00:09:15,638 --> 00:09:18,718 ‎夠了,普奇 165 00:09:18,808 --> 00:09:20,388 ‎快點走開 166 00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:23,147 ‎你家一直有墨西哥捲餅的味道 167 00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:25,362 ‎讓我好餓 168 00:09:26,232 --> 00:09:29,992 ‎真是奇怪,不過我有東西可以給妳看 169 00:09:31,320 --> 00:09:34,410 ‎跟托瑪士一起燃燒你吃進的熱量 170 00:09:34,490 --> 00:09:38,080 ‎史上最棒的運動 ‎隨妳怎麼吃都不會有罪惡感 171 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:39,330 ‎我要上 172 00:09:40,454 --> 00:09:41,624 ‎那是什麼味道? 173 00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:44,541 ‎我會被抓到的 174 00:09:44,625 --> 00:09:47,495 ‎在我被抓到前快回我 175 00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:49,837 ‎怎麼是妳?我妹呢? 176 00:09:49,922 --> 00:09:53,132 ‎克麗斯塔搬來跟我們住 ‎她現在獨立了 177 00:09:54,510 --> 00:09:57,390 ‎真酷,我要把她的房間改成大辦公室 178 00:09:58,264 --> 00:10:00,474 ‎好樣的,你可以幫我嗎? 179 00:10:01,350 --> 00:10:03,100 ‎她想要紅色的洋裝 180 00:10:03,185 --> 00:10:05,975 ‎太難了,她的洋裝多到爆 181 00:10:06,063 --> 00:10:09,693 ‎-她聖誕節穿的珊瑚粉? ‎-那不是粉色 182 00:10:10,568 --> 00:10:13,238 ‎你們學校有開紅色系的課嗎? 183 00:10:13,321 --> 00:10:15,361 ‎沒有,《時尚雜誌》有 184 00:10:16,574 --> 00:10:21,164 ‎我願意幫妳,但我不記得了 ‎不過我有視覺記憶 185 00:10:25,666 --> 00:10:26,826 ‎你確定嗎? 186 00:10:26,917 --> 00:10:30,547 ‎我要看到才會記得 ‎這是天賦也是頭疼之處 187 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:35,680 ‎這件呢? 188 00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:41,974 ‎對,好像是這件,不過… 189 00:10:42,975 --> 00:10:46,555 ‎克麗斯塔有穿著跳舞 ‎妳跳給我看,我再跟妳說 190 00:10:52,693 --> 00:10:53,943 ‎你這變態 191 00:11:01,452 --> 00:11:04,622 ‎她想要你說出我們的墨西哥捲餅生意 192 00:11:04,705 --> 00:11:08,165 ‎可以給她一個嗎? ‎萬一她餓死怎麼辦? 193 00:11:08,250 --> 00:11:10,880 ‎放聰明點,孩子,她也是敵人之一 194 00:11:10,961 --> 00:11:14,591 ‎-她運動時,我會讓她開口的 ‎-很好 195 00:11:15,174 --> 00:11:16,014 ‎妳穿那是什麼? 196 00:11:16,676 --> 00:11:17,966 ‎-嘿 ‎-不是吧 197 00:11:18,052 --> 00:11:20,142 ‎-你們別說話 ‎-什麼? 198 00:11:20,221 --> 00:11:24,101 ‎我晚點再解釋,重點是席爾薇雅瘋了 199 00:11:24,183 --> 00:11:27,103 ‎她說因為她不能敲鑼,所以被詛咒了 200 00:11:27,186 --> 00:11:31,266 ‎所以要用雞蛋清理,淨化她的氣場 201 00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:38,568 ‎那些人真好騙 202 00:11:38,656 --> 00:11:40,696 ‎蛋是用來對付邪惡之眼的 203 00:11:40,783 --> 00:11:42,953 ‎我敢說她有幸運符 204 00:11:43,035 --> 00:11:44,285 ‎就像冷戰時 205 00:11:44,370 --> 00:11:47,790 ‎俄國和美國想要的東西不同 206 00:11:47,873 --> 00:11:49,293 ‎所以他們常起衝突 207 00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:52,125 ‎說得很好,珍妮,我們要先下手為強 208 00:11:52,211 --> 00:11:54,591 ‎以免金髮妹的女兒 ‎發現我們的捲餅事業 209 00:11:55,214 --> 00:11:56,054 ‎妳有蛋嗎? 210 00:11:56,132 --> 00:11:59,802 ‎-只有我堅強的卵子,媽 ‎-這才是我女兒 211 00:12:15,776 --> 00:12:18,356 ‎-太好了,我們要贏了 ‎-我看看 212 00:12:18,446 --> 00:12:20,656 ‎(泰莉:雞蛋任務完成了) 213 00:12:21,532 --> 00:12:22,662 ‎妳好 214 00:12:25,035 --> 00:12:26,285 ‎我們有保險套嗎? 215 00:12:28,497 --> 00:12:31,457 ‎這一切由上帝決定 ‎看祂要不要我們懷孕 216 00:12:34,211 --> 00:12:36,381 ‎你是怎麼回事? 217 00:12:37,089 --> 00:12:39,719 ‎你聽起來好像噎到了 218 00:12:39,800 --> 00:12:43,260 ‎恩尼斯托有個客戶只跟猶太人做生意 219 00:12:43,345 --> 00:12:47,305 ‎所以我不是簡納洛了 ‎現在我叫莫伊賽蘇可里 220 00:12:47,391 --> 00:12:49,691 ‎感謝上帝 221 00:12:50,394 --> 00:12:52,354 ‎不管你覺得自己是誰,老公 222 00:12:52,438 --> 00:12:56,728 ‎我覺得恩尼斯托想讓你一敗塗地 ‎然後找藉口開除你 223 00:12:56,817 --> 00:12:59,277 ‎這樣他瘋癲的太太 ‎才不會知道他雇用你 224 00:12:59,361 --> 00:13:02,161 ‎不會啦,老婆,他是我兄弟 225 00:13:02,239 --> 00:13:05,619 ‎拜託你,老公,恩尼斯托是敵方 226 00:13:05,701 --> 00:13:09,211 ‎誰會叫自己養不起小孩的兄弟 ‎多生幾個? 227 00:13:09,288 --> 00:13:11,418 ‎我開計程車時載過猶太人 228 00:13:11,499 --> 00:13:15,499 ‎那就是做生意而已,對吧? ‎他只是在耍你 229 00:13:16,086 --> 00:13:18,296 ‎或抓你的小辮子 230 00:13:18,380 --> 00:13:20,380 ‎你的辮子,這個說法好貼切 231 00:13:20,466 --> 00:13:24,046 ‎很好笑啊,你快點笑,老公 232 00:13:27,556 --> 00:13:31,516 ‎所有的蛋都要用嗎,太太? ‎要不要我再去拿? 233 00:13:31,602 --> 00:13:34,362 ‎把妳的壞磁場帶去別的地方,專心點 234 00:13:38,818 --> 00:13:40,818 ‎好了,準備好了嗎? 235 00:13:45,115 --> 00:13:48,485 ‎不,他們偷了我的好運 236 00:13:48,577 --> 00:13:50,497 ‎不行,太太 237 00:13:52,206 --> 00:13:53,666 ‎妳會失去院子的 238 00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:56,593 ‎那頭驢子會吃掉妳的花 239 00:13:57,586 --> 00:13:59,666 ‎我必須廢止這項協議 240 00:14:01,006 --> 00:14:03,006 ‎都是那個女人害的 241 00:14:04,134 --> 00:14:06,764 ‎蕾歐諾讓我知道你不是我的朋友 242 00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:09,474 ‎等一下 243 00:14:09,557 --> 00:14:12,727 ‎你喜歡《蒙面的愛》嗎? ‎那是我最愛的肥皂劇 244 00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:15,560 ‎-不是吧,真的嗎? ‎-真的 245 00:14:16,605 --> 00:14:20,225 ‎賽巴斯提安羅梅洛自以為是誰? 246 00:14:20,317 --> 00:14:23,527 ‎不知道,他怎麼可以為了梅莫 ‎而拋棄瑪莉安娜費南多 247 00:14:23,612 --> 00:14:25,072 ‎我覺得他在利用他 248 00:14:25,155 --> 00:14:28,195 ‎沒錯,兄弟 ‎你也是鐵粉這件事太棒了 249 00:14:28,284 --> 00:14:31,664 ‎我終於可以跟人討論肥皂劇 ‎不用怕被講閒話 250 00:14:33,330 --> 00:14:35,250 ‎我說過沒有騙妳 251 00:14:37,334 --> 00:14:39,634 ‎賽巴斯提安羅梅洛 ‎為什麼我對你而言還不夠? 252 00:14:39,712 --> 00:14:42,422 ‎為什麼我對你而言還不夠 ‎恩尼斯托? 253 00:14:42,506 --> 00:14:43,716 ‎-什麼? ‎-什麼? 254 00:14:44,425 --> 00:14:45,675 ‎妳怎麼可以這麼說? 255 00:14:45,759 --> 00:14:48,349 ‎你怎麼可以這麼說,簡納洛洛培茲? 256 00:14:48,429 --> 00:14:49,929 ‎你想改變我 257 00:14:50,014 --> 00:14:53,144 ‎你想改變我 ‎為什麼不接受我的樣子? 258 00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:56,190 ‎-我不是莫伊塞 ‎-我是瑪莉安娜費南多 259 00:14:56,270 --> 00:15:00,440 ‎我是簡納洛,這樣對你來說就夠好了 260 00:15:00,524 --> 00:15:03,784 ‎-不是這樣的,簡納洛 ‎-問題是這個世界 261 00:15:03,861 --> 00:15:05,951 ‎是我的客戶錯了 262 00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:09,330 ‎有時候人們就是短視近利 263 00:15:09,408 --> 00:15:13,578 ‎所以我們要戴上面具讓他們喜歡我們 ‎就像莫伊塞這樣 264 00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:20,338 ‎我們要做好準備,等機會上門 265 00:15:20,419 --> 00:15:23,129 ‎-我們是兄妹 ‎-不要 266 00:15:24,632 --> 00:15:25,472 ‎進來 267 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:31,760 ‎嗨,昨天的事很抱歉 ‎你讓我措手不及 268 00:15:31,847 --> 00:15:36,477 ‎克麗斯塔派我來拿內衣 ‎但我不曉得是哪一件 269 00:15:37,561 --> 00:15:38,941 ‎願意幫我試穿嗎? 270 00:15:41,106 --> 00:15:41,936 ‎好 271 00:15:42,024 --> 00:15:43,734 ‎再做多一點,用力 272 00:15:44,234 --> 00:15:45,904 ‎-機關槍 ‎-不是吧 273 00:15:45,986 --> 00:15:47,146 ‎快點 274 00:15:47,237 --> 00:15:51,737 ‎這是怎樣? ‎多用點力,快一點,妳可以的 275 00:15:51,825 --> 00:15:55,035 ‎就是這樣,拿出態度 ‎想吃墨西哥捲餅嗎? 276 00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:59,000 ‎-想吃 ‎-不乖,因為這樣,開合跳 277 00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:01,003 ‎我不會吃墨西哥捲餅的 278 00:16:01,085 --> 00:16:04,335 ‎我只想吃一個,但這不值得 279 00:16:04,421 --> 00:16:06,051 ‎-為什麼? ‎-我的身體是聖殿 280 00:16:06,131 --> 00:16:08,181 ‎-大聲點 ‎-我的身體是聖殿 281 00:16:09,134 --> 00:16:10,224 ‎很好 282 00:16:11,303 --> 00:16:12,143 ‎到此為止 283 00:16:12,638 --> 00:16:15,268 ‎-妳還好嗎? ‎-沒事 284 00:16:21,230 --> 00:16:23,360 ‎-你太過份了 ‎-什麼? 285 00:16:23,440 --> 00:16:26,190 ‎女生喜歡去健身房有兩個原因 286 00:16:26,777 --> 00:16:29,907 ‎去自拍或搞曖昧 ‎結果你搞成監獄訓練 287 00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:34,789 ‎我會為了你 ‎讓克麗斯塔變成辣妹,相信我 288 00:16:34,868 --> 00:16:38,408 ‎想像力就是最強力的春藥 289 00:16:39,289 --> 00:16:43,419 ‎我就喜歡這樣,穿異性服裝的男女 290 00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:45,086 ‎這樣有錯嗎? 291 00:16:45,170 --> 00:16:48,170 ‎當然沒錯,但一定要化妝嗎? 292 00:16:48,257 --> 00:16:52,757 ‎對,我喜歡這樣,你也會愛上的 293 00:16:53,637 --> 00:16:54,467 ‎等下就知道 294 00:16:55,097 --> 00:16:58,847 ‎要先試穿哪一個,這件還是這件? 295 00:17:02,896 --> 00:17:03,766 ‎好 296 00:17:05,274 --> 00:17:08,574 ‎我穿這件給你看,你穿這件給我看 297 00:17:18,370 --> 00:17:20,370 ‎你一直糾纏著她 298 00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:22,876 ‎拿食物給她,叫她運動 299 00:17:22,958 --> 00:17:27,208 ‎為了戳破她的泡泡 ‎這是我最起碼能做的事 300 00:17:27,296 --> 00:17:31,046 ‎要她知道席爾薇雅愛普奇比愛她多 301 00:17:31,133 --> 00:17:33,093 ‎-就是… ‎-她說不定會自殺 302 00:17:33,177 --> 00:17:34,087 ‎她這樣說嗎? 303 00:17:34,178 --> 00:17:38,718 ‎沒有,但很多白癡 ‎不在家自殺,卻跑去飯店 304 00:17:38,807 --> 00:17:40,017 ‎這倒是 305 00:17:40,100 --> 00:17:42,730 ‎外甥,我跟你說個故事 306 00:17:42,811 --> 00:17:46,321 ‎我有個獄友叫麥克 307 00:17:46,398 --> 00:17:49,738 ‎我請他吃豬腳墨西哥玉米餅 ‎結果害他消化不良 308 00:17:49,818 --> 00:17:54,818 ‎可是麥克那晚跟老闆有要事相約 309 00:17:56,241 --> 00:17:59,241 ‎但他太不舒服,無法赴約 310 00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:03,168 ‎我只好替補他,代他去了那場會面 311 00:18:03,248 --> 00:18:05,328 ‎在那邊只能隨機應變 312 00:18:05,417 --> 00:18:07,417 ‎事情接二連三 313 00:18:08,253 --> 00:18:11,263 ‎一件又一件發生 314 00:18:13,133 --> 00:18:16,393 ‎我的意思是,外甥 315 00:18:16,470 --> 00:18:18,430 ‎我們要面對自己的問題 316 00:18:19,014 --> 00:18:24,604 ‎沒錯,很多事都是你想出來的 317 00:18:24,686 --> 00:18:25,646 ‎這裡好熱 318 00:18:27,981 --> 00:18:29,361 ‎亞伯拉罕,我的兄弟 319 00:18:30,109 --> 00:18:32,779 ‎你好嗎?這位是莫伊塞蘇可里 320 00:18:33,237 --> 00:18:34,907 ‎祝你平安,莫伊塞,你好嗎? 321 00:18:34,988 --> 00:18:37,318 ‎感謝上帝,很好,你呢? 322 00:18:37,407 --> 00:18:38,487 ‎感謝上帝 323 00:18:38,992 --> 00:18:41,502 ‎謝謝你們週日過來這邊 324 00:18:42,037 --> 00:18:47,497 ‎只有這裡能不做作、誠實地做生意 325 00:18:48,544 --> 00:18:49,504 ‎不用任何偽裝 326 00:18:52,506 --> 00:18:53,376 ‎我準備好了 327 00:18:53,465 --> 00:18:54,585 ‎-你準備好了 ‎-對 328 00:18:57,719 --> 00:18:59,719 ‎墨西哥富二代推特帳戶 329 00:18:59,805 --> 00:19:01,595 ‎什麼?拜託妳別拍了 330 00:19:01,682 --> 00:19:05,602 ‎你跟克麗斯塔不像,可是卻很像你媽 331 00:19:05,686 --> 00:19:06,936 ‎我才不像席爾薇雅 332 00:19:07,020 --> 00:19:09,940 ‎迷你版的席爾薇雅說 ‎“都是蕾歐諾的錯” 333 00:19:10,023 --> 00:19:11,613 ‎席爾薇雅不是我媽 334 00:19:15,904 --> 00:19:17,414 ‎我真的很驚訝 335 00:19:18,532 --> 00:19:22,582 ‎賣制服30年,我從沒考慮過舒適 336 00:19:22,661 --> 00:19:26,711 ‎我覺得非猶太裔的工人要的就是舒適 337 00:19:26,790 --> 00:19:29,630 ‎穿上後一整天就像高階人士一樣 338 00:19:29,710 --> 00:19:31,800 ‎屁股不會有緊繃感 339 00:19:37,593 --> 00:19:38,973 ‎這個客戶是你的了 340 00:19:40,387 --> 00:19:42,597 ‎我幫你撿 341 00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:47,228 ‎天啊 342 00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:49,055 ‎你不是猶太人 343 00:19:54,568 --> 00:19:55,528 ‎迪耶戈,開門 344 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:58,610 ‎我絕對不會上傳照片的 ‎我只是在報復你 345 00:19:59,573 --> 00:20:02,413 ‎我不知道席爾薇雅不是你的母親 346 00:20:02,993 --> 00:20:05,373 ‎我媽在我受洗時過世了 ‎我從沒見過她 347 00:20:05,954 --> 00:20:08,334 ‎我們院子裡有棵名為碧雅提絲的樹 348 00:20:09,124 --> 00:20:10,214 ‎她的骨灰就埋在那 349 00:20:10,709 --> 00:20:13,419 ‎這就是我爸不想輸掉院子的原因 350 00:20:13,503 --> 00:20:17,093 ‎-迪耶戈,對不起,我真的不曉得 ‎-妳走吧 351 00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:21,892 ‎別再鬧了,驢子 352 00:20:23,013 --> 00:20:26,893 ‎-快過來吃 ‎-我不確定這招有沒有效,太太 353 00:20:26,975 --> 00:20:29,725 ‎快盡妳的職責,卡塔 354 00:20:29,811 --> 00:20:31,151 ‎就放那裡 355 00:20:31,855 --> 00:20:33,765 ‎好吃喔 356 00:20:34,691 --> 00:20:36,441 ‎多放點,卡塔 357 00:20:37,027 --> 00:20:38,357 ‎好了,太太 358 00:20:38,445 --> 00:20:41,735 ‎好,妳現在要躲起來 359 00:20:41,823 --> 00:20:44,033 ‎等這隻野獸越界時 360 00:20:44,117 --> 00:20:47,867 ‎拍下照片給大家看 ‎牠跑進我們的院子拉屎 361 00:20:47,955 --> 00:20:51,455 ‎那個計程車司機會輸的 ‎到時候我就可以再次 362 00:20:53,210 --> 00:20:54,090 ‎敲響我的鑼 363 00:20:59,633 --> 00:21:00,723 ‎什麼? 364 00:21:02,469 --> 00:21:03,389 ‎這不可能 365 00:21:03,470 --> 00:21:05,310 ‎妳有數對嗎? 366 00:21:05,931 --> 00:21:07,641 ‎大概數了15次,少了一個 367 00:21:10,352 --> 00:21:12,192 ‎我知道是誰拿走的 368 00:21:14,773 --> 00:21:16,283 ‎-什麼事? ‎-迪耶戈 369 00:21:17,150 --> 00:21:19,610 ‎-進來 ‎-洛培茲家綁架了克麗斯塔 370 00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:23,565 ‎-沒有,他們沒綁架她,席爾 ‎-我們一定要去救她,你有化妝? 371 00:21:23,657 --> 00:21:26,287 ‎妳是怎麼了?當然沒有 372 00:21:26,368 --> 00:21:27,948 ‎隨便,快換衣服 373 00:21:28,036 --> 00:21:31,366 ‎-快點,我們要去救她 ‎-好 374 00:21:31,456 --> 00:21:33,456 ‎妳叫夏奇比較好聽 375 00:21:34,334 --> 00:21:35,674 ‎妳現在乖多了 376 00:21:36,837 --> 00:21:38,507 ‎妳從哪拿的籃子? 377 00:21:39,172 --> 00:21:42,802 ‎-房子裡有好多個 ‎-真不敢相信我們被妳逮到了 378 00:21:42,884 --> 00:21:44,854 ‎這是史上最棒的驚喜 379 00:21:44,928 --> 00:21:47,928 ‎真不敢相信你們為了我 ‎準備這麼多墨西哥捲餅 380 00:21:48,015 --> 00:21:52,475 ‎就算你們很窮,也比我父母好太多了 381 00:21:52,561 --> 00:21:54,861 ‎我媽不在乎我 382 00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:57,270 ‎聽著 383 00:21:58,400 --> 00:21:59,650 ‎借過一下,夏奇 384 00:22:00,527 --> 00:22:02,277 ‎親愛的,連我都會犯錯 385 00:22:02,946 --> 00:22:05,276 ‎妳媽不是一直這麼惡劣 386 00:22:06,033 --> 00:22:10,003 ‎妳可能覺得她是怪物,她不愛妳 387 00:22:10,078 --> 00:22:13,538 ‎但就算孩子恨媽媽 ‎我們還是要教育他們 388 00:22:13,623 --> 00:22:16,043 ‎所以我們才會這麼嘮叨 389 00:22:23,842 --> 00:22:27,432 ‎我不管你怎麼想 ‎一定是他們拖她進來的 390 00:22:31,266 --> 00:22:32,766 ‎真是垃圾堆 391 00:22:33,268 --> 00:22:37,398 ‎這些乳製品愛好者 ‎不曉得冰淇淋要冰哪嗎? 392 00:22:37,481 --> 00:22:38,941 ‎為什麼?我看看 393 00:22:40,025 --> 00:22:41,985 ‎香腸、馬鈴薯、飯 394 00:22:43,362 --> 00:22:45,912 ‎豆子、綠莎莎醬,真噁心 395 00:22:46,448 --> 00:22:48,528 ‎他們拿盒子做什麼? 396 00:22:48,617 --> 00:22:51,747 ‎那帕布羅、泰莉 ‎跟另一個小孩恨妳嗎? 397 00:22:51,828 --> 00:22:54,618 ‎他們不是真心恨我的 398 00:22:55,582 --> 00:22:59,172 ‎珍妮恨我幫她辦初次聖禮派對 399 00:22:59,252 --> 00:23:01,882 ‎阿帕呢,他恨我要他割包皮 400 00:23:01,963 --> 00:23:03,973 ‎還有泰莉 401 00:23:04,049 --> 00:23:07,339 ‎因為我跟妳哥哥 ‎一起合作設計他的應用程式 402 00:23:08,178 --> 00:23:13,388 ‎亞伯拉罕不介意我不是猶太人 ‎他是討厭我們騙他,尼托 403 00:23:13,475 --> 00:23:15,055 ‎這都要怪我 404 00:23:15,852 --> 00:23:17,772 ‎抱歉我讓毛巾掉了 405 00:23:17,854 --> 00:23:20,694 ‎但是假扮別人是不對的 406 00:23:20,774 --> 00:23:22,574 ‎尤其你是這麼好的人 407 00:23:23,276 --> 00:23:26,356 ‎你不顧我們老婆之間的嫌隙雇用我 408 00:23:26,446 --> 00:23:28,946 ‎這點非常重要 409 00:23:29,032 --> 00:23:30,832 ‎謝謝你,簡尼 410 00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:37,623 ‎我就說吧,他們從沒去過賭城 411 00:23:37,707 --> 00:23:38,827 ‎糟了 412 00:23:41,795 --> 00:23:42,995 ‎這太慘了 413 00:23:43,088 --> 00:23:45,258 ‎不會吧,牠好像普奇喔 414 00:23:45,340 --> 00:23:48,140 ‎噁心的版本,走開 415 00:23:48,677 --> 00:23:49,967 ‎這裡真的是地獄 416 00:23:51,263 --> 00:23:54,563 ‎媽媽就算犯了錯,也是為孩子好 417 00:23:55,267 --> 00:23:58,767 ‎我們不是完人,妳媽一定有優點 418 00:23:59,354 --> 00:24:01,444 ‎只是要很用心去找 419 00:24:02,566 --> 00:24:06,146 ‎我相信妳一定會找到的 ‎她跟妳一樣瘦 420 00:24:06,236 --> 00:24:08,566 ‎一頭金髮,髮尾沒有分岔 421 00:24:09,030 --> 00:24:12,910 ‎她照顧好自己和你們,幫妳算卡路里 422 00:24:13,785 --> 00:24:16,705 ‎好母親會關心孩子的健康 423 00:24:17,456 --> 00:24:18,666 ‎我知道一件事 424 00:24:19,624 --> 00:24:22,134 ‎她會為了妳不惜一切,親愛的 425 00:24:30,677 --> 00:24:32,257 ‎對,你說的對 426 00:24:32,345 --> 00:24:36,475 ‎尊嚴是最珍貴的 ‎2000萬元的廣告也比不上 427 00:24:37,142 --> 00:24:38,482 ‎2000萬元? 428 00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:41,520 ‎有2000萬,要我用指甲刀割包皮都行 429 00:24:44,900 --> 00:24:47,820 ‎這太好笑了,是泰莉小時候 430 00:24:47,903 --> 00:24:48,903 ‎你有看到這個嗎? 431 00:24:54,451 --> 00:24:56,541 ‎那克麗斯塔怎麼辦? 432 00:24:57,787 --> 00:24:59,657 ‎-你們在這裡做什麼? ‎-媽? 433 00:24:59,748 --> 00:25:02,288 ‎-妳在這裡 ‎-這樣違反協議了 434 00:25:02,375 --> 00:25:05,085 ‎現在放了我女兒,不然我就要報警了 435 00:25:05,170 --> 00:25:07,710 ‎-她沒有被綁架 ‎-妳在叫什麼? 436 00:25:07,797 --> 00:25:09,627 ‎-他們綁架了克麗斯塔? ‎-什麼? 437 00:25:09,716 --> 00:25:12,046 ‎-妳聽她講 ‎-沒人綁架我 438 00:25:12,761 --> 00:25:15,101 ‎對了,我在這住了兩天 439 00:25:16,389 --> 00:25:17,269 ‎妳完全沒發現 440 00:25:17,349 --> 00:25:21,849 ‎我當然有發現 ‎我在決定要怎麼救妳出來 441 00:25:21,937 --> 00:25:23,977 ‎妳不用救我 442 00:25:24,731 --> 00:25:26,071 ‎我自己選擇來這的 443 00:25:27,275 --> 00:25:28,315 ‎我喜歡這裡 444 00:25:29,152 --> 00:25:30,822 ‎斯德哥爾摩症候群症 445 00:25:30,904 --> 00:25:34,204 ‎-什麼?這會傳染嗎? ‎-應該不會 446 00:25:34,282 --> 00:25:36,032 ‎聽著,洛培茲家 447 00:25:38,495 --> 00:25:39,405 ‎是最棒的 448 00:25:40,372 --> 00:25:41,582 ‎他們都愛我 449 00:25:41,665 --> 00:25:44,035 ‎親愛的,妳語無倫次了 450 00:25:44,125 --> 00:25:47,795 ‎我們回家談,拜託 ‎不要在這些人面前講 451 00:25:47,879 --> 00:25:52,089 ‎-這些人會揍扁妳 ‎-這些人對我很好 452 00:25:53,510 --> 00:25:55,430 ‎他們還買了一整籃的墨西哥捲餅給我 453 00:25:55,512 --> 00:25:59,022 ‎這是要讓妳狂長痘痘,親愛的 ‎毀了妳的社交生活 454 00:25:59,099 --> 00:26:01,889 ‎當然不是,那是因為她很難過 455 00:26:01,977 --> 00:26:04,897 ‎妳有聽過 ‎“肚子飽了,心情就好了”嗎? 456 00:26:05,564 --> 00:26:07,944 ‎我受夠了妳無視我 457 00:26:08,525 --> 00:26:11,235 ‎迪耶戈寶貝永遠排第一位 458 00:26:12,153 --> 00:26:15,493 ‎那不是他的錯,他很想念自己的生母 459 00:26:15,574 --> 00:26:17,584 ‎-什麼? ‎-真的嗎? 460 00:26:17,659 --> 00:26:20,079 ‎現在是在演八點檔嗎?白人小孩受苦 461 00:26:20,161 --> 00:26:22,871 ‎就能夠逃過一切 ‎像演員迪耶戈路那? 462 00:26:22,956 --> 00:26:26,626 ‎這位迪耶戈有兩個媽媽 463 00:26:27,419 --> 00:26:28,919 ‎一個死了,另一個還活著 464 00:26:30,338 --> 00:26:32,758 ‎我連昏迷在床的媽媽都沒有 465 00:26:36,261 --> 00:26:37,351 ‎這… 466 00:26:38,597 --> 00:26:41,807 ‎洛培茲家的各位 ‎艾思賓諾薩家不請自來 467 00:26:41,891 --> 00:26:43,561 ‎這表示我們贏了 468 00:26:43,643 --> 00:26:45,273 ‎-對 ‎-所以我們走吧 469 00:26:46,855 --> 00:26:49,685 ‎她們吵得正激烈,我們再待一下 470 00:26:51,651 --> 00:26:53,361 ‎大家走吧,拜託 471 00:26:54,446 --> 00:26:55,276 ‎走吧 472 00:26:58,491 --> 00:26:59,491 ‎走吧,迪耶戈 473 00:27:01,286 --> 00:27:02,406 ‎快來,迪耶戈 474 00:27:03,455 --> 00:27:04,285 ‎親愛的 475 00:27:04,831 --> 00:27:07,381 ‎我不知道原來妳有這種感覺 476 00:27:08,627 --> 00:27:11,167 ‎我愛迪耶戈沒有比愛妳多 477 00:27:11,254 --> 00:27:14,384 ‎他只是比較需要人照料 478 00:27:16,009 --> 00:27:18,889 ‎但妳對我來說是最重要的 479 00:27:18,970 --> 00:27:22,680 ‎看到妳在這裡跟驢子一起時 ‎我完全忘了兩家的協議 480 00:27:23,350 --> 00:27:24,770 ‎過來這裡救妳 481 00:27:25,352 --> 00:27:26,772 ‎我只在乎妳 482 00:27:27,354 --> 00:27:30,864 ‎為了妳,我願意不惜一切 483 00:27:32,067 --> 00:27:34,437 ‎不要我的院子、美甲,妳看 484 00:27:37,530 --> 00:27:39,200 ‎甚至我的美國運通卡 485 00:27:40,200 --> 00:27:41,200 ‎媽 486 00:27:42,619 --> 00:27:44,499 ‎我好愛妳 487 00:28:06,434 --> 00:28:09,154 ‎-瑞秋給我們留了評價 ‎-留什麼? 488 00:28:10,230 --> 00:28:13,860 ‎洛培茲民宿不只是住的地方 489 00:28:13,942 --> 00:28:17,532 ‎還有心理治療和好多籃滿滿的捲餅 490 00:28:18,113 --> 00:28:23,033 ‎經理是最棒的 ‎帕布羅洛培茲真的很酷 491 00:28:23,118 --> 00:28:25,948 ‎看到沒?我就說吧 492 00:28:26,621 --> 00:28:29,081 ‎有時候事情是自己想出來的 493 00:31:12,996 --> 00:31:17,996 ‎字幕翻譯:林佩孜