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AN ORIGINAL NETFLIX SERIES
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Watch your lover's butt
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as they rise up
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00:00:15,515 --> 00:00:19,015
and go down sensually
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during the breathing exercise.
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Speaking of butts,
mine was famous in jail.
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I know how arousing it can be.
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Cut it out.
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Tantric yoga helps improve our sex drive
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as we put our bodies in contact
with our partners' bodies.
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Cut it out, honey!
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-Very good! What a lion!
-Keep going.
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-Inhale, exhale, very good.
-You're doing it wrong. Pay attention.
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Okay, I think we'll stop here
to avoid any accidents.
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And to all of you, namaste.
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Mastes.
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I'd like to acknowledge
someone who exudes sexuality.
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Let's just say
he's a natural penis master.
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She caught me!
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Genaro, I'd like to ask you
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to share your light
on my blog with a video.
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Bravo!
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Leo, dear.
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-Yes?
-It's just him in the video.
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Let's just say that some partners
aren't such great partners yet.
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Tantric yoga will be particularly helpful
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for the Espinozas.
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What?
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You transmitted
a total lack of sexual connection.
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-Read it.
-Thanks.
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Everybody knows
if the Lopezes are good in bed
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it's because it's cheaper than Netflix.
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Forgive me, but I do have Netflix,
and instead of solving your issue,
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you two spy on us, which causes frigidity.
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Girls, remember we can all improve.
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Or be honest and tell me
which of us has a perfect sex life?
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You want a class?
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Don't miss a roll in the hay
with the country's best lover,
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yours truly.
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I'm sore all over
from standing on my toes so long.
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But honey…
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On second thought,
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open up those chakras wide for me,
because here I come!
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Yes! Come!
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Giddyap, penis master!
It's the ride of your life!
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-Oh, yes!
-That's my penis master!
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Keep going!
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Yes!
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Yes, penis master!
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Yes! More!
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I got a new business idea.
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The tantra teacher's success
reminded me how much sex sells.
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Interested?
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00:03:01,556 --> 00:03:06,806
No, in jail I learned not to mix
business with pleasure.
55
00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:10,265
Dad's not investing a penny.
It's all from my savings.
56
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From the allowance Daddy gives you?
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-She's right.
-Uncle, get dressed!
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But I am dressed.
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Any self-respecting CEO
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risks their own money
like Mark Zuckerberg.
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It'll be like Rappi,
but using WhatsApp to sell sex toys.
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Just imagine.
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Facebook's Zuckerberg?
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-Uncle!
-What?
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I can't do what I want in my own home?
66
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"No condoms for a quickie?
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We deliver them.
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No Viagra for a quickie?
We buy it for you.
69
00:03:46,643 --> 00:03:49,853
Are you looking for a gay fling
and need some poppers?
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We're there for you."
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00:03:52,315 --> 00:03:56,065
Diego even composed a jingle.
Qui-ckie!
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Look, you can sell
this second-hand in your business.
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Check it out. Ta-da!
74
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Hold on.
75
00:04:06,746 --> 00:04:10,706
Have you lost your mind?
Nobody buys those used.
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00:04:10,792 --> 00:04:14,382
So, you're saying you can't be
with a divorcee because she's used?
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That's why you never had a girlfriend.
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Only convicts know what love is.
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No one should have one of those.
You're going to hell.
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Doesn't she look like Crista?
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-What? Never mind her.
-Of course not.
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You are awesome, baby.
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Wow! She speaks English!
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She's yours for free, nephew.
Just bleach her down first.
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-What for?
-Better safe than make your buddy sorry.
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Right?
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Is that a saying?
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What a dump.
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-So, potatoes remove dark circles?
-Yes. We use them at home.
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But brown skin doesn't get dark circles.
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What's wrong with you?
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I couldn't sleep with all the moaning
from the ghetto masters next door,
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while you slept like a log,
we didn't practice the position I wanted.
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I can't carry you like that.
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-Are you calling me fat?
-I said no such thing.
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I won't let those ghetto masters beat us.
You need to be the penis master.
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Got it?
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Don't fret, girls.
The first time is never easy.
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There's no need for any stress,
pleasure is like a blast wave
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that spreads
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throughout
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your body.
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And we begin.
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Women
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are like a beautiful flower.
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Give them your fertilizer
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and they bloom.
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Should I be hearing this, Dad?
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Cover your ears, honey.
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Pablito won't help me.
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I don't know how to post online.
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You're the brains in the family, honey.
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You'll be successful when you grow up.
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Come on, post it!
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-What's that sound?
-You got some comments.
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Read them to me.
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From @titillo.
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"What foods turn women on?"
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From @anonymous.
"Am I gay if I dream about penises?"
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From @billy-goat.
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"My wife complains
because my joystick is broken."
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His joystick?
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Well…
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I'll explain later, honey.
These poor earthlings need my help.
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Film me again, honey.
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Dear Titillo, potato tlacoyos work for me.
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And you, billy-goat,
don't let her pressure you.
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If you really can't get it up,
save your honor by running away.
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Follow me on @penismaster for more advice.
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What's this filth?
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You crossed a line, Leo.
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What?
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All night I heard you howling.
134
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Is that any example to set for the girls?
135
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Lovemaking must be silent.
That's what pillows are for.
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That's what the nuns said.
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Lots of women think
some pleasure is a sin.
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All pleasure is sinful,
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except my potato tlacoyos.
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Of course not, Mom, please.
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Haven't you had an orgasm?
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That tingling in your tlacoyo?
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Blessed Virgin!
144
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Alright then, show me a nice toy.
145
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This is the Uh, Ah, Maxi Sensations.
146
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Comes with ten speeds
and three kinds of vibrations.
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You can use it
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underwater.
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Great.
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00:07:53,931 --> 00:07:57,441
And to ensure your business
gets off on the right foot,
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I'll take the she-devil costume too.
152
00:07:59,562 --> 00:08:02,062
How about some body gloss?
153
00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:03,818
-What for?
-It makes you glow.
154
00:08:03,900 --> 00:08:07,320
Come on, Tere. I don't need
to glow in the dark like a UFO.
155
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You won't regret your purchase.
156
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No returns or exchanges, of course.
Enjoy your new toy.
157
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Georgie, did you order that?
158
00:08:19,457 --> 00:08:20,577
No!
159
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What is it?
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00:08:22,460 --> 00:08:25,000
-It's your order, Yolis.
-I didn't buy that!
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So please leave my house.
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You!
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Get inside!
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There are always ups and downs.
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Maybe, your spandex put the off.
166
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It's for biking the deliveries.
167
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Maybe it's the wrong packaging?
168
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I can see why someone might be obsessed.
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I mean offended
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by that package.
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Give it to me, baby.
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Sure, Crystal. The every people love you.
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You are so big and handsome.
174
00:09:10,675 --> 00:09:12,885
Funny, so to end the interview.
175
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Tell me, why Mexico?
176
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What you tell me us?
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Yeah, baby.
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Give it to me hard.
179
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:25,061
What are you doing?
Why are you interviewing a sex doll?
180
00:09:25,147 --> 00:09:26,267
Here's why.
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I got 100 followers in 12 hours.
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00:09:29,443 --> 00:09:33,493
In a month, man!
I'll be the king of North Korea.
183
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:36,333
The Chinese get turned on
by the weirdest things.
184
00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:38,239
They even have cartoon porn.
185
00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:39,908
Wentai?
186
00:09:39,996 --> 00:09:42,286
Pablo, not all Asians are Chinese.
187
00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:45,422
The comments I read are South Korean.
188
00:09:45,501 --> 00:09:48,631
And the Japanese invented hentai.
189
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PLEASE REMOVE THOSE VIDEOS!
190
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It's from the neighbor.
191
00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:56,390
Let me finish editing this first.
192
00:10:03,519 --> 00:10:05,019
Do you notice nothing?
193
00:10:05,104 --> 00:10:08,574
I've been waiting all day.
Everything hurts, including my pride.
194
00:10:08,649 --> 00:10:13,199
I even got the tantric chair
to practice the Shiva position for you.
195
00:10:13,279 --> 00:10:15,819
I hurt my right knee with my backhand.
196
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,044
Yeah?
197
00:10:20,911 --> 00:10:22,121
I don't care.
198
00:10:26,584 --> 00:10:30,924
Boy, do I have a treat for you,
a massage with a happy-ending.
199
00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:36,139
Wasn't it the right knee?
200
00:10:38,554 --> 00:10:39,604
How dare you?
201
00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:42,600
Calm down, I hate doing it in the daytime.
202
00:10:42,683 --> 00:10:44,523
I'm sick of the tantric stuff.
203
00:10:46,228 --> 00:10:49,438
Remember that night on our honeymoon?
204
00:10:50,316 --> 00:10:51,436
In the pool?
205
00:10:53,277 --> 00:10:56,447
How could I forget? You outdid yourself.
206
00:10:57,031 --> 00:10:58,821
That was legendary!
207
00:10:59,784 --> 00:11:01,044
Let's do it again.
208
00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:04,326
Tonight.
209
00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:06,544
We've got a date.
210
00:11:08,250 --> 00:11:09,170
These people!
211
00:11:09,251 --> 00:11:11,801
I knew we should charge for cancellations.
212
00:11:11,879 --> 00:11:14,129
The transparent plastic bags reveal
213
00:11:14,715 --> 00:11:16,465
the hypocrisy of rich peoples.
214
00:11:16,550 --> 00:11:18,840
The guilt makes them bad lovers.
215
00:11:18,928 --> 00:11:20,098
How would you know?
216
00:11:20,721 --> 00:11:22,721
How many rich guys have you been with?
217
00:11:26,560 --> 00:11:27,560
I can't tell you,
218
00:11:28,354 --> 00:11:31,614
because you'll want
to know all the details.
219
00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:32,861
Is that a problem?
220
00:11:34,110 --> 00:11:36,150
It would violate my employee contract.
221
00:11:38,614 --> 00:11:40,914
But trust me, I know from experience.
222
00:11:45,871 --> 00:11:47,081
Inhale.
223
00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:48,997
Exhale.
224
00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:50,579
Very good.
225
00:11:51,377 --> 00:11:55,717
I always recommend
asking permission before entering.
226
00:11:55,798 --> 00:11:56,668
May I enter?
227
00:11:56,757 --> 00:11:58,877
So, we say, "May I come in?"
228
00:11:58,968 --> 00:11:59,928
May I come in?
229
00:12:00,428 --> 00:12:03,428
It feels like we do have permission.
230
00:12:03,514 --> 00:12:08,104
Don't forget to inhale and experience
a universe of possibilities.
231
00:12:09,228 --> 00:12:10,058
Damn!
232
00:12:21,449 --> 00:12:25,539
-How did you get in?
-Dude! Locking the door is so tacky.
233
00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:27,330
Why are you doing this?
234
00:12:27,413 --> 00:12:31,463
The whole school thinks
we're dating because of your videos.
235
00:12:31,542 --> 00:12:33,592
They call me "Chaca Cris."
236
00:12:33,669 --> 00:12:34,799
Like Chaca.
237
00:12:35,421 --> 00:12:37,881
Get it? They think
I look like that sex doll.
238
00:12:38,507 --> 00:12:42,717
But isn't Mariana your BFF?
She nicknamed you that.
239
00:12:43,971 --> 00:12:48,271
I don't know what's up with your friends,
but I'll keep posting for my thousands
240
00:12:48,350 --> 00:12:50,560
of followers in one of the Koreas.
241
00:12:50,644 --> 00:12:53,904
I need followers,
including you and your friends.
242
00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:10,920
-Ready?
-Yes.
243
00:13:13,709 --> 00:13:16,589
Damn, you temptress! That's smoking!
244
00:13:16,670 --> 00:13:18,050
Let's do it, baby!
245
00:13:18,672 --> 00:13:19,512
Come, my love.
246
00:13:21,050 --> 00:13:21,930
That's it.
247
00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:23,510
-Wait.
-What?
248
00:13:23,594 --> 00:13:25,934
-Let me go on top.
-Okay. Whatever you want.
249
00:13:27,097 --> 00:13:28,387
-Ready?
-Yes.
250
00:13:28,474 --> 00:13:30,484
-Like that?
-Grab my butt, honey.
251
00:13:30,559 --> 00:13:31,389
Yes.
252
00:13:31,477 --> 00:13:32,307
Grab me hard.
253
00:13:38,984 --> 00:13:41,704
-What wrong?
-I've never been with a she-devil.
254
00:13:45,574 --> 00:13:46,414
No problem.
255
00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:48,952
I have something we can play with.
256
00:13:51,288 --> 00:13:54,288
What are you up to? I'm not into that.
257
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:56,705
It's not for you, dummy.
258
00:13:56,794 --> 00:14:01,724
Sure, I gave you so much pleasure,
now you need not one, but two.
259
00:14:01,799 --> 00:14:03,009
Stop it, honey.
260
00:14:05,469 --> 00:14:06,969
I just wanted to try it.
261
00:14:07,054 --> 00:14:08,814
But it seems too much
262
00:14:08,889 --> 00:14:10,519
for the penis mother,
263
00:14:10,599 --> 00:14:12,099
or whatever you're called.
264
00:14:13,894 --> 00:14:14,984
Penis master.
265
00:14:18,399 --> 00:14:21,359
-We should've done this ages ago.
-Right.
266
00:14:21,443 --> 00:14:25,363
-The tantra thing is so lame.
-And we won't mess up the house.
267
00:14:25,447 --> 00:14:27,657
Mess me up all you want, babe!
268
00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:32,123
Serious?
269
00:14:32,204 --> 00:14:33,714
Are you ready?
270
00:14:40,379 --> 00:14:41,339
Come here.
271
00:14:44,925 --> 00:14:47,175
I love you, Ernesto!
272
00:14:49,471 --> 00:14:50,761
I love it!
273
00:14:51,348 --> 00:14:52,428
Yes!
274
00:14:52,516 --> 00:14:53,346
That bitch!
275
00:14:53,434 --> 00:14:55,644
Take me, Ernesto!
276
00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:01,190
I haven't done anything, my love.
277
00:15:02,443 --> 00:15:03,283
What's up?
278
00:15:05,321 --> 00:15:07,361
Swimming in your underwear?
279
00:15:09,033 --> 00:15:10,333
Shall we go, honey?
280
00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:12,160
Yes, off you go.
281
00:15:12,244 --> 00:15:15,164
And take your racket back to your house.
282
00:15:15,247 --> 00:15:16,167
Wait!
283
00:15:16,248 --> 00:15:18,208
Look who's talking.
284
00:15:18,292 --> 00:15:20,632
The nympho who howls like a cat in heat.
285
00:15:20,711 --> 00:15:24,211
But I don't mess up
other people's pools to have fun.
286
00:15:24,298 --> 00:15:27,338
Have fun with that ape you call a husband?
287
00:15:27,426 --> 00:15:30,506
At least my ape gets it up.
Yours lost his banana.
288
00:15:31,221 --> 00:15:32,641
No offense, neighbor.
289
00:15:32,723 --> 00:15:34,393
I'm coming!
290
00:15:34,475 --> 00:15:36,265
Where are the intruders?
291
00:15:36,352 --> 00:15:40,362
-Right here, committing lewd acts.
-No we're not.
292
00:15:40,439 --> 00:15:43,029
-We'll get them out.
-Mom?
293
00:15:43,108 --> 00:15:46,318
-No. We're fine.
-This is a private pool. Please!
294
00:15:49,865 --> 00:15:52,115
I left Crystal here. What happened?
295
00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:56,294
What?
296
00:15:58,707 --> 00:16:00,627
DELETE THE TIK TOKS OR CRYSTAL DIES!
297
00:16:01,585 --> 00:16:02,745
That bitch!
298
00:16:03,587 --> 00:16:06,087
That damn rich kid! Rich girl?
299
00:16:06,173 --> 00:16:08,683
That damn rich chick
will not ruin my doll.
300
00:16:09,843 --> 00:16:12,853
No, Uncle. We'll rescue Crystal, trust me.
301
00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:17,015
Quickie. I want a quickie.
302
00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:20,600
We are here with your Quickie order.
303
00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:24,900
What? I didn't buy anything.
304
00:16:27,403 --> 00:16:30,203
It's the new seven-speed blender
305
00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:33,240
for anything that needs a good stir.
306
00:16:35,285 --> 00:16:36,945
Yes, of course!
307
00:16:37,037 --> 00:16:38,907
Yes, I did order this.
308
00:16:39,540 --> 00:16:40,370
Thank you.
309
00:16:48,424 --> 00:16:52,304
We don't need to be
so corny over our first sale.
310
00:16:59,309 --> 00:17:03,019
HOW DO I SEDUCE MY NEIGHBOR?
SHE'S A CRESCENT AND I'M A FULL MOON.
311
00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:05,896
-You order a pizza?
-No.
312
00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:08,153
With big hot luscious sausage?
313
00:17:08,235 --> 00:17:09,315
Sure you did.
314
00:17:09,403 --> 00:17:13,453
No. Listen to me.
What address did they give you?
315
00:17:13,532 --> 00:17:14,452
Yours.
316
00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:15,953
You're quite self-assured.
317
00:17:19,079 --> 00:17:20,409
Blessed Virgin!
318
00:17:24,209 --> 00:17:27,799
No! Wait a minute! Mom!
319
00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:29,170
Mom!
320
00:17:29,757 --> 00:17:31,877
Mom! Stop it. I mean it.
321
00:17:31,967 --> 00:17:33,087
I'm serious.
322
00:17:33,594 --> 00:17:34,724
What's the matter?
323
00:17:36,263 --> 00:17:37,933
What have you done, blondie?
324
00:17:38,015 --> 00:17:40,765
I wouldn't be like that if I were you.
325
00:17:41,643 --> 00:17:45,903
I'll post it on the neighborhood chat.
This makes us equal for the pool thing.
326
00:17:45,981 --> 00:17:49,991
You brought that on yourself
with your fake porn show.
327
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:53,529
You had a fling with that kid
because you can't get any at home.
328
00:17:54,198 --> 00:17:57,488
Mention Rober again
and this goes to your husband.
329
00:17:57,576 --> 00:17:59,366
You don't have his number.
330
00:17:59,453 --> 00:18:02,293
I'm on the security board.
I have all of them.
331
00:18:02,372 --> 00:18:03,542
You wouldn't dare.
332
00:18:03,624 --> 00:18:06,594
You have a video
that could ruin my marriage.
333
00:18:07,169 --> 00:18:10,299
I'll trade the stripper for Rober.
What do you say?
334
00:18:11,632 --> 00:18:14,432
Ridiculous! I can deal with Genaro.
335
00:18:14,510 --> 00:18:16,220
But to show you I don't care,
336
00:18:17,179 --> 00:18:18,429
I'll give back your yard.
337
00:18:18,514 --> 00:18:19,774
Don't you miss it?
338
00:18:24,561 --> 00:18:25,901
All right!
339
00:18:25,979 --> 00:18:27,649
I'll delete it myself.
340
00:18:27,731 --> 00:18:29,321
There. Oh, no!
341
00:18:29,399 --> 00:18:30,819
What have I done?
342
00:18:30,901 --> 00:18:32,281
Delete it!
343
00:18:35,697 --> 00:18:38,237
You sent it to Gerardo and the neighbors!
344
00:18:38,325 --> 00:18:40,485
My husband's name is Genaro!
345
00:18:41,537 --> 00:18:44,117
Whatever! G is for ghetto!
346
00:18:44,206 --> 00:18:45,036
Fuck you!
347
00:18:46,041 --> 00:18:46,961
Get out!
348
00:18:47,042 --> 00:18:48,092
Scram!
349
00:18:48,168 --> 00:18:49,168
I can't do this.
350
00:18:50,379 --> 00:18:52,339
Silvia's pressuring me with the tantra
351
00:18:52,422 --> 00:18:55,842
even though I took your advice
about running away.
352
00:18:55,926 --> 00:19:01,136
-You're @billygoat?
-Yes, if only I were @penismaster.
353
00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:03,683
-It's not that easy, Neto.
-No?
354
00:19:03,767 --> 00:19:08,227
I turned Leonor into a sex addict.
Now, I'm not good enough for her.
355
00:19:08,313 --> 00:19:10,943
If you're not good enough, who is?
356
00:19:11,024 --> 00:19:14,824
Don't you feel
like you can't fail even once?
357
00:19:15,487 --> 00:19:19,067
Yes, do you feel like
you need to be a sex machine?
358
00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:21,698
Yes, that's it exactly, Neto!
359
00:19:21,785 --> 00:19:24,825
It's not fair. We need to be free.
360
00:19:25,497 --> 00:19:26,957
Like my granddad used to say,
361
00:19:27,457 --> 00:19:29,497
"Let your work mind sleep,
362
00:19:30,335 --> 00:19:32,705
to awaken the mind of pleasure."
363
00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:36,336
That's what I'll do with Silvia!
364
00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:40,135
You're the best thing that's happened
to the local guys, come here.
365
00:19:57,863 --> 00:19:59,493
Move on my signal, over.
366
00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:01,119
Copy that, kid.
367
00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:07,042
You by air and me by land
with all we've got, over.
368
00:20:07,122 --> 00:20:10,632
Operation Bird Returns to Nest
starts now, over.
369
00:20:10,709 --> 00:20:11,539
Wait.
370
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:14,130
If anything happens…
371
00:20:16,506 --> 00:20:17,716
we had a good run.
372
00:20:20,594 --> 00:20:22,224
-Cheers, baby.
-Cheers.
373
00:20:22,930 --> 00:20:25,890
Aren't you gonna congratulate me properly.
374
00:20:26,642 --> 00:20:29,062
But, of course, I will.
375
00:20:29,144 --> 00:20:30,774
-Yes?
-You deserve
376
00:20:30,854 --> 00:20:32,024
a super…
377
00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:35,146
massage.
378
00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:38,066
Okay.
379
00:20:41,907 --> 00:20:43,947
I missed you, baby.
380
00:20:54,086 --> 00:20:56,336
Want me to strip like that stripper?
381
00:20:58,131 --> 00:21:01,051
That slut sent him. It was a trap.
382
00:21:01,134 --> 00:21:02,014
Sure.
383
00:21:03,053 --> 00:21:05,683
What are you mad about?
You smell like a strip club.
384
00:21:06,723 --> 00:21:10,103
I know you go and ignore
the strippers when you feel down.
385
00:21:11,645 --> 00:21:15,265
I never complain
because I always put you first.
386
00:21:16,441 --> 00:21:18,281
That's the problem, Genaro.
387
00:21:22,239 --> 00:21:23,819
I need to tell you
388
00:21:24,908 --> 00:21:28,328
what I like or not in bed,
but it doesn't undermine you.
389
00:21:29,955 --> 00:21:33,375
Like that wrestler mask you love.
390
00:21:33,458 --> 00:21:34,918
The Rey Mysterio mask?
391
00:21:35,502 --> 00:21:36,342
That one.
392
00:21:36,420 --> 00:21:38,550
It's a total turn-off.
393
00:21:39,131 --> 00:21:41,091
-I'll get rid of it.
-Really?
394
00:21:44,052 --> 00:21:46,512
Forgive me for not asking,
my little devil.
395
00:21:47,556 --> 00:21:49,266
-But I'm ready now.
-You are?
396
00:21:49,349 --> 00:21:50,979
What do you want me to do?
397
00:21:51,059 --> 00:21:51,889
Anything?
398
00:21:52,686 --> 00:21:55,806
Well, for starters, penis master,
why don't we try…
399
00:21:56,815 --> 00:21:57,645
wait a sec.
400
00:21:58,150 --> 00:22:00,650
How about trying this out? Come on.
401
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:05,870
Rich people need so much to get turned on.
402
00:22:05,949 --> 00:22:07,529
-Don't you?
-Me?
403
00:22:08,827 --> 00:22:10,037
This is all I need.
404
00:22:14,541 --> 00:22:18,131
"Dear Rich Kid,
tell your girl you love her style,
405
00:22:18,211 --> 00:22:20,631
and she will open up her flower to you."
406
00:22:25,635 --> 00:22:26,795
Are you okay?
407
00:22:28,013 --> 00:22:29,013
I love your flower!
408
00:22:30,432 --> 00:22:33,732
I mean, your personality,
the flower in all of us.
409
00:22:35,729 --> 00:22:40,689
I'm not some player who fools around.
All I care about is in here.
410
00:22:41,485 --> 00:22:42,735
And here.
411
00:22:45,030 --> 00:22:46,160
Can I smell your hair?
412
00:22:47,741 --> 00:22:48,741
Okay.
413
00:22:48,825 --> 00:22:49,655
Yes?
414
00:22:54,373 --> 00:22:55,253
It smells nice.
415
00:22:55,749 --> 00:22:56,579
Thanks.
416
00:22:57,417 --> 00:23:00,247
Can I see your boobs? Just one.
417
00:23:00,337 --> 00:23:01,417
Just be quiet.
418
00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:09,640
I'm chafed. I haven't ridden
my bike since I was eight.
419
00:23:09,721 --> 00:23:11,101
But I can do it.
420
00:23:12,766 --> 00:23:14,056
Baby.
421
00:23:17,229 --> 00:23:19,359
Baby, you turn me on.
422
00:23:19,940 --> 00:23:21,320
You deserve everything.
423
00:23:21,942 --> 00:23:23,362
You're on fire, baby.
424
00:23:25,278 --> 00:23:26,948
We'll never leave this room.
425
00:23:34,037 --> 00:23:34,867
Baby.
426
00:23:38,583 --> 00:23:40,003
You're on fire, baby.
427
00:23:47,551 --> 00:23:48,391
Yes!
428
00:23:51,763 --> 00:23:53,353
Beatriz!
429
00:23:57,227 --> 00:23:58,307
Silvia!
430
00:24:01,064 --> 00:24:02,154
Unbelievable!
431
00:24:03,191 --> 00:24:07,111
If I were Beatriz, I'd be dead,
and you'd be a necrophile.
432
00:24:07,195 --> 00:24:09,025
Just ignore me, my love.
433
00:24:09,114 --> 00:24:11,204
That was just a very dumb mistake.
434
00:24:11,283 --> 00:24:13,083
Seeing the tree crossed my wires.
435
00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:15,290
Living with the ghost of a woman
436
00:24:15,370 --> 00:24:19,210
who choked on the host
at her son's baptism is too much.
437
00:24:19,291 --> 00:24:21,211
You make me the happiest man alive.
438
00:24:21,293 --> 00:24:23,343
Please, let me go.
439
00:24:23,837 --> 00:24:24,667
Bye.
440
00:24:30,802 --> 00:24:32,432
Something's burning, right?
441
00:24:33,763 --> 00:24:35,023
I'm burning up for you.
442
00:24:37,392 --> 00:24:38,642
No! Dude!
443
00:24:40,353 --> 00:24:41,193
I mean it.
444
00:24:44,983 --> 00:24:45,823
No way!
445
00:24:49,905 --> 00:24:51,565
This huge house
446
00:24:52,324 --> 00:24:54,874
can't take a little smoke?
447
00:24:55,911 --> 00:24:56,791
Lord!
448
00:24:58,038 --> 00:25:02,288
-What's going on, Mom?
-I just tried out the charcoal stove.
449
00:25:04,252 --> 00:25:06,842
Okay, be more careful next time.
450
00:25:06,922 --> 00:25:09,222
You better watch it too.
451
00:25:12,677 --> 00:25:15,847
-What now?
-Are you Satan himself now, Leo?
452
00:25:16,598 --> 00:25:19,728
Your beloved Genaro loves it
and I love it even more.
453
00:25:20,352 --> 00:25:24,152
Mom, you taught me
some weird ideas about sex.
454
00:25:24,231 --> 00:25:27,151
I only taught you what I was taught.
455
00:25:28,902 --> 00:25:30,322
We must be respectable.
456
00:25:31,738 --> 00:25:32,858
Yes, Mom.
457
00:25:32,948 --> 00:25:34,988
I know you had the best intentions.
458
00:25:35,075 --> 00:25:37,655
And now that I respect myself,
459
00:25:37,744 --> 00:25:40,464
I learned to ask and not just give.
460
00:25:40,539 --> 00:25:43,289
Being a mischievous she-devil
isn't all bad.
461
00:25:43,375 --> 00:25:45,455
You should try it sometime.
462
00:25:47,003 --> 00:25:47,843
I love you.
463
00:25:51,424 --> 00:25:52,514
Target located.
464
00:25:54,553 --> 00:25:56,223
Careful, Uncle! It's Crista!
465
00:26:02,435 --> 00:26:03,805
DELETE THE TIK TOKS
466
00:26:04,729 --> 00:26:05,559
No!
467
00:26:09,859 --> 00:26:12,319
GHETTO QUEEN CRISTA
468
00:26:12,404 --> 00:26:13,574
No way!
469
00:26:16,741 --> 00:26:18,371
You hideous doll!
470
00:26:18,952 --> 00:26:20,662
You're always right.
471
00:26:42,058 --> 00:26:45,228
Why are you cutting down
that beautiful tree?
472
00:26:45,312 --> 00:26:46,562
No!
473
00:26:46,646 --> 00:26:47,556
Wow.
474
00:26:47,647 --> 00:26:51,817
It's a reminder that all my husband
can think of is his dead wife!
475
00:26:55,238 --> 00:26:56,948
He called me Beatriz in bed.
476
00:26:58,033 --> 00:27:00,123
After months of not touching me.
477
00:27:01,536 --> 00:27:03,406
I feel like such an asshole.
478
00:27:04,039 --> 00:27:06,539
Hey, don't call yourself that.
479
00:27:12,130 --> 00:27:16,180
-We all mess up once in a while.
-Except you and your penis master.
480
00:27:16,259 --> 00:27:20,639
Before those yoga classes,
the truth is I never…
481
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:23,930
I never felt like I do today.
482
00:27:25,685 --> 00:27:28,015
Don't live in anybody's shadow.
483
00:27:28,980 --> 00:27:30,070
You come first.
484
00:27:30,148 --> 00:27:33,318
That's what I learned since I moved here.
485
00:27:49,292 --> 00:27:51,842
That damn Pablo was right!
486
00:27:52,671 --> 00:27:54,511
I have the worst friends ever!
487
00:27:56,633 --> 00:27:58,643
Pablo is my only true friend.
488
00:27:59,177 --> 00:28:00,507
You're awesome!
489
00:28:01,888 --> 00:28:03,098
You're great!
490
00:28:06,393 --> 00:28:08,233
You're perfect!
491
00:28:10,313 --> 00:28:12,693
No wonder these dolls sell so well.
492
00:28:15,193 --> 00:28:17,783
Uncle! Stop! Get out of there!
493
00:28:19,322 --> 00:28:21,242
Pablo, what's wrong with you?
494
00:28:21,324 --> 00:28:23,544
Do we enter the rich girl's room?
495
00:28:25,370 --> 00:28:26,790
Pablo? Answer me.
496
00:28:28,915 --> 00:28:31,285
Damn family of perverts!
497
00:28:32,293 --> 00:28:33,133
Hey!
498
00:28:33,712 --> 00:28:34,752
Unbelievable!
499
00:28:35,714 --> 00:28:37,224
What are you doing there?
500
00:28:37,298 --> 00:28:38,378
Hi, Mom.
501
00:28:41,010 --> 00:28:43,970
A penis master doesn't like to brag
502
00:28:44,472 --> 00:28:45,932
Anyone can do it, right?
503
00:28:47,267 --> 00:28:49,307
The thing that's hard for everyone…
504
00:28:52,355 --> 00:28:53,815
is talking to your partner.
505
00:28:54,315 --> 00:28:56,855
There's always something
we don't want to hear.
506
00:28:58,445 --> 00:29:00,155
So, be prepared, guys.
507
00:29:01,030 --> 00:29:04,080
Because change is hard, but possible.
508
00:29:05,410 --> 00:29:08,120
We can't go around only pleasing others.
509
00:29:08,997 --> 00:29:12,247
First you need to know
what makes you happy,
510
00:29:12,333 --> 00:29:14,383
to know what makes them happy.
511
00:29:15,587 --> 00:29:19,047
If nobody has ever told you,
you have a natural talent,
512
00:29:19,132 --> 00:29:20,382
don't worry about it.
513
00:29:21,134 --> 00:29:23,514
Not everyone is great in bed like me.
514
00:31:59,918 --> 00:32:04,958
Subtitle translation by: Ricardo Espinoza