1 00:00:08,842 --> 00:00:09,882 ‎(房屋出售) 2 00:00:09,968 --> 00:00:11,848 ‎NETFLIX 原创剧集 3 00:00:14,639 --> 00:00:15,809 ‎好邻居! 4 00:00:18,476 --> 00:00:23,056 ‎真为你高兴 你终于想开了 ‎知道这种生活方式不适合你 5 00:00:23,148 --> 00:00:26,568 ‎的确 ‎我不喜欢邻居的虱子在我的泳池里 6 00:00:26,651 --> 00:00:29,571 ‎我进去的时候 ‎池子里早爬满了虱子 7 00:00:29,654 --> 00:00:31,994 ‎说实话 我们会想你们的 8 00:00:32,073 --> 00:00:34,913 ‎真的吗?最想什么?那头驴吗? 9 00:00:35,827 --> 00:00:37,117 ‎还是晾衣绳? 10 00:00:40,206 --> 00:00:43,916 ‎坦白说 我最想你了 11 00:00:44,002 --> 00:00:44,842 ‎真的吗? 12 00:00:45,336 --> 00:00:46,876 ‎那我们怎么办? 13 00:00:46,963 --> 00:00:52,093 ‎中奖只能让你留下六个月 ‎不是一整年 14 00:00:52,177 --> 00:00:54,297 ‎-真可惜 ‎-是啊? 15 00:00:54,387 --> 00:00:55,637 ‎天啊! 16 00:00:55,722 --> 00:00:56,892 ‎是哈 17 00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:02,901 ‎怎么了 妈? 18 00:01:02,979 --> 00:01:07,029 ‎最纯洁的圣母!这是圣母玛利亚! 19 00:01:08,276 --> 00:01:09,396 ‎房子绝对不能卖 20 00:01:11,946 --> 00:01:13,276 ‎真要命! 21 00:01:13,364 --> 00:01:15,954 ‎(全球最佳姥姥) 22 00:01:19,079 --> 00:01:21,409 ‎-我们必须把房子卖掉 ‎-上帝不允许! 23 00:01:21,498 --> 00:01:24,628 ‎我们几乎承受不了养房成本 24 00:01:24,709 --> 00:01:27,339 ‎赫纳罗的薪水勉强撑得起一个公寓 25 00:01:27,420 --> 00:01:28,670 ‎这么多? 26 00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:32,875 ‎如果孩子们想去更好的学校 ‎或着渡个假 27 00:01:32,967 --> 00:01:34,637 ‎那我们必须卖房 28 00:01:34,719 --> 00:01:37,469 ‎圣母玛利亚出现永远是有原因的 29 00:01:37,555 --> 00:01:42,435 ‎要么她想让我们留下 ‎要么她想惩罚我们的罪恶 30 00:01:42,519 --> 00:01:43,899 ‎千万不要! 31 00:01:43,978 --> 00:01:44,978 ‎天呐! 32 00:01:45,063 --> 00:01:50,073 ‎我犯了很多罪 ‎尤其自从听了叔叔的话 33 00:01:50,151 --> 00:01:54,071 ‎-总是怪罪大帅哥 ‎-你妈永远是对的 亲爱的 34 00:01:54,155 --> 00:01:57,905 ‎你不是做梦都想发财吗? ‎还想赢那架飞机 35 00:01:57,992 --> 00:01:59,872 ‎在地狱里 钱有什么用? 36 00:01:59,953 --> 00:02:02,213 ‎什么时候你开始这么虔诚了? 37 00:02:02,288 --> 00:02:05,418 ‎当时去吃圣餐 你只是为了填饱肚子 38 00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:09,710 ‎别在圣母面前拌嘴 ‎她会上去告我们的 39 00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:11,966 ‎你们什么时候都这么虔诚了? 40 00:02:12,048 --> 00:02:15,258 ‎巴布罗 教堂吓到你 ‎圣人们都盯着你 41 00:02:15,343 --> 00:02:16,933 ‎没错 就像这样 42 00:02:17,011 --> 00:02:19,601 ‎别说了 珍妮 ‎你自己的成人礼都没有去 43 00:02:19,681 --> 00:02:23,311 ‎你呢 泰莉? ‎你说宗教是人们的灵魂 44 00:02:23,393 --> 00:02:24,943 ‎人们的鸦片 妈妈 45 00:02:25,019 --> 00:02:28,229 ‎一回事 你们很久都没去教堂了 46 00:02:28,314 --> 00:02:30,824 ‎圣母玛利亚让我们走出贫困 47 00:02:31,484 --> 00:02:33,494 ‎真的 听好了 48 00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:35,164 ‎说吧 49 00:02:35,238 --> 00:02:38,948 ‎我们的卢尔德夫人大教堂 ‎每年访客超过六百万 50 00:02:39,033 --> 00:02:43,003 ‎想象一下 如果我们要求 ‎每人捐十比索 51 00:02:43,079 --> 00:02:48,039 ‎加上瓶装圣水和蒙福符 全副武装 52 00:02:48,126 --> 00:02:51,376 ‎我完全反对拿宗教做生意 53 00:02:51,462 --> 00:02:54,632 ‎又不偷 又不抢 全靠自愿捐款 54 00:02:54,716 --> 00:02:59,386 ‎我们无法阻止人们为天堂社区祈祷 55 00:02:59,470 --> 00:03:01,430 ‎你们这群骗子得全部去地狱 56 00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:05,441 ‎这位圣母只是水渍 57 00:03:05,518 --> 00:03:07,058 ‎不好意思 58 00:03:09,814 --> 00:03:12,574 ‎几周前你说过 会跟你太太聊聊 59 00:03:12,650 --> 00:03:13,610 ‎时机还没到 60 00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:16,403 ‎怎么能把小西叫成贝崔丝? 61 00:03:17,071 --> 00:03:20,071 ‎你们不是直接花点钱 ‎就可以摆平了? 62 00:03:20,158 --> 00:03:22,738 ‎只要保持沉默 她会忘记的 63 00:03:22,827 --> 00:03:25,037 ‎女人永远不会忘记的 64 00:03:25,121 --> 00:03:29,541 ‎只会把怨气攒到下一次吵架 65 00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:34,916 ‎你不会攒怨气 攒旧衣服倒是有一套 ‎这些东西得处理掉了 66 00:03:35,006 --> 00:03:38,296 ‎处理你自己的 ‎我可没什么好处理的 67 00:03:38,384 --> 00:03:42,314 ‎-这件呢? ‎-用它擦镜子嘛 68 00:03:42,388 --> 00:03:47,438 ‎麻理惠的整理秘诀 ‎处理掉任何不再让你开心的东西 69 00:03:47,518 --> 00:03:48,348 ‎看 厄内斯托 70 00:03:49,479 --> 00:03:52,069 ‎这件球服见证了我们的友谊 71 00:03:53,316 --> 00:03:55,396 ‎我不能丢掉 不可能 72 00:03:55,485 --> 00:03:57,315 ‎我会很想你的 厄内斯托 73 00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:01,067 ‎我无法隐藏我的情感了 74 00:04:01,699 --> 00:04:05,249 ‎我要离开这里 ‎没人喜欢我 因为… 75 00:04:05,328 --> 00:04:09,538 ‎你没法儿离开 你的家有 ‎圣玛利亚的水印 没人敢买你的房子 76 00:04:09,624 --> 00:04:13,094 ‎你不懂蕾奥 ‎她总有路子搞到自己想要的 77 00:04:14,045 --> 00:04:15,205 ‎等等 78 00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:17,336 ‎喂 亲爱的? 79 00:04:17,423 --> 00:04:20,093 ‎圣母水印让蕾奥娜改了主意 80 00:04:20,176 --> 00:04:22,386 ‎他们选择继续穷下去! 81 00:04:23,137 --> 00:04:26,267 ‎买房子时 我非常确信 ‎这个社区没有乡巴佬 82 00:04:26,849 --> 00:04:29,269 ‎现在得把我气死了! 83 00:04:29,894 --> 00:04:30,734 ‎你在哪里? 84 00:04:30,812 --> 00:04:33,192 ‎网球俱乐部 我马上过来 85 00:04:34,482 --> 00:04:37,282 ‎我不得不撒谎 你懂的 86 00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:39,991 ‎这事不怪你 怪我 87 00:04:43,157 --> 00:04:44,157 ‎什么事? 88 00:04:44,784 --> 00:04:48,374 ‎我想下午请个假 ‎去看看圣母 可以吗? 89 00:04:48,454 --> 00:04:49,584 ‎当然不行 90 00:04:49,664 --> 00:04:53,714 ‎我绝对不会资助他们的房子 91 00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:56,634 ‎必须想法子除掉他们 92 00:04:56,713 --> 00:04:58,053 ‎你在惩罚我 93 00:04:58,131 --> 00:05:01,511 ‎我不是故意偷走奖券的 94 00:05:02,010 --> 00:05:05,100 ‎当时只想拿到赔车门的钱 95 00:05:05,179 --> 00:05:07,929 ‎但上帝让它成了中奖号码 96 00:05:08,016 --> 00:05:09,476 ‎打住 等一下 97 00:05:10,393 --> 00:05:11,393 ‎是这样啊 98 00:05:11,477 --> 00:05:15,227 ‎我的惩罚是和小西做邻居 对吧? 99 00:05:17,025 --> 00:05:18,895 ‎好了 我忏悔了 100 00:05:19,444 --> 00:05:22,534 ‎求求你 圣母 ‎我们不能继续住在这里了 101 00:05:22,613 --> 00:05:26,953 ‎要么你给我几百万 ‎要么我把房子卖了 102 00:05:27,035 --> 00:05:29,035 ‎就这么定了 怎么样? 103 00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:30,370 ‎(欢迎朝圣者) 104 00:05:30,455 --> 00:05:33,365 ‎快点 叔叔 稍微转过来 105 00:05:34,250 --> 00:05:36,170 ‎如果大家开车过来… 106 00:05:36,878 --> 00:05:38,708 ‎克丽丝塔 可以聊聊吗? 107 00:05:40,423 --> 00:05:41,673 ‎克丽丝塔 求你了! 108 00:05:44,635 --> 00:05:47,465 ‎她配不上你 小巴布罗 ‎我会… 109 00:05:47,555 --> 00:05:51,385 ‎没事的 叔叔 别给我出主意了 谢谢 110 00:05:52,101 --> 00:05:53,141 ‎小巴布罗 111 00:05:59,942 --> 00:06:01,402 ‎(卫生间:五美元) 112 00:06:01,486 --> 00:06:03,396 ‎上帝与我们同在 113 00:06:04,113 --> 00:06:08,033 ‎所以别着急 你可以进去了 114 00:06:08,117 --> 00:06:12,657 ‎这不公平 ‎我和很多人来得都比她早 115 00:06:13,998 --> 00:06:15,288 ‎不能这么说 116 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:20,455 ‎耶稣怎么说? ‎“那在后的 上天堂时将要在前” 117 00:06:20,546 --> 00:06:22,546 ‎但是在地上 118 00:06:22,632 --> 00:06:26,222 ‎贵宾优先 因为他们捐的更多 119 00:06:26,302 --> 00:06:29,262 ‎这不公平 算了 我走 120 00:06:34,894 --> 00:06:36,944 ‎-是不是很厉害? ‎-是的 121 00:06:37,855 --> 00:06:38,725 ‎我的意思是 122 00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:40,482 ‎你进步了 123 00:06:41,150 --> 00:06:43,610 ‎这可能是搬家前的最后一次了 124 00:06:44,695 --> 00:06:46,105 ‎真要走吗? 125 00:06:46,197 --> 00:06:49,907 ‎好吧 跟你的感觉很独特 126 00:06:49,992 --> 00:06:52,622 ‎真的吗?我也是 127 00:06:52,703 --> 00:06:54,623 ‎真的吗?为什么? 128 00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:56,615 ‎你先说 129 00:06:58,209 --> 00:06:59,709 ‎你不脱毛 你刮毛 130 00:07:01,170 --> 00:07:04,840 ‎你上公立学校 坐过地铁 131 00:07:06,801 --> 00:07:10,811 ‎我从来没有做过一个浑身脱毛 ‎比我还爱呻吟的男人 132 00:07:10,888 --> 00:07:14,308 ‎但我知道 我还是你最好的 ‎你会想我的 133 00:07:14,392 --> 00:07:17,192 ‎我说你进步了 像所有大人物一样 134 00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:19,360 ‎你只听自己想听的 135 00:07:19,856 --> 00:07:24,856 ‎就算你不承认 反正你会想我的 136 00:07:27,989 --> 00:07:31,159 ‎我觉得是个水渍 你觉得呢? 137 00:07:33,995 --> 00:07:35,655 ‎特佩亚克夫人 138 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:39,420 ‎不行 女士 139 00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:42,420 ‎我不可能碰圣母玛利亚 140 00:07:42,503 --> 00:07:45,213 ‎-入场费还没付呢 ‎-什么费? 141 00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:46,508 ‎这个混蛋! 142 00:07:47,884 --> 00:07:53,104 ‎亲爱的 跟你讲过 ‎圣母玛利亚是真的 143 00:07:53,181 --> 00:07:55,931 ‎-阿尔伯托德阿尔科来了 ‎-谁? 144 00:07:56,017 --> 00:08:00,057 ‎他的《捉鬼敢死队》节目得过奖 145 00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:03,186 ‎-小鬼宝宝他爸! ‎-就是他 146 00:08:04,066 --> 00:08:07,566 ‎-阿尔伯托 《捉鬼敢死队》? ‎-是的 正是我 147 00:08:07,653 --> 00:08:10,783 ‎-我是蕾奥娜 这里的业主 ‎-你好 148 00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:13,575 ‎-我们在卖这栋房子 ‎-全都卖 包括圣母? 149 00:08:13,659 --> 00:08:16,699 ‎-是啊? ‎-这真是个奇迹 150 00:08:16,787 --> 00:08:21,457 ‎我出的价会比这位漂白金发高出5% 151 00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:23,542 ‎谁漂的白 这么难看? 152 00:08:23,628 --> 00:08:27,508 ‎她让我先买的 你们都是证人 对吧? 153 00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:28,470 ‎对 154 00:08:28,549 --> 00:08:31,089 ‎-告诉她 ‎-是伯托! 155 00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:34,177 ‎好吧 我比这个骗子多出5% 156 00:08:34,263 --> 00:08:38,393 ‎别管她 她就像个老泼妇 ‎把你逼进死胡同 157 00:08:38,476 --> 00:08:41,516 ‎我看过你的节目 ‎你是精神商人 对吧? 158 00:08:41,604 --> 00:08:44,824 ‎-对 ‎-终于找到矿了 我是说找到福气了 159 00:08:44,899 --> 00:08:46,069 ‎好 160 00:08:46,150 --> 00:08:50,070 ‎我们的卢尔德夫人大教堂 ‎每年接待访客超过六百万 161 00:08:50,154 --> 00:08:51,574 ‎-真的吗? ‎-所以 162 00:08:57,954 --> 00:09:01,254 ‎所以这里没人去地狱 ‎房子还是可以卖掉的 163 00:09:01,332 --> 00:09:04,672 ‎伯托还是会让朝圣者拜访圣母 164 00:09:05,836 --> 00:09:08,376 ‎如果他不会处理掉圣母 也没关系 165 00:09:08,464 --> 00:09:12,054 ‎-什么? ‎-只要完成了上帝的旨意 就行了 166 00:09:12,134 --> 00:09:14,394 ‎-是吧? ‎-是的 167 00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:18,218 ‎我们要发财了 ‎我梦想中的车就要到手了 168 00:09:18,307 --> 00:09:22,137 ‎-我不用遛狗挣钱了 ‎-我也不用跟你一起遛狗了 169 00:09:23,020 --> 00:09:25,940 ‎-我可以上一所好学校 ‎-对 170 00:09:27,066 --> 00:09:30,646 ‎-我爱你妈妈 ‎-我也爱你们 亲爱的 171 00:09:30,736 --> 00:09:32,696 ‎我还需要伯托签字 172 00:09:32,780 --> 00:09:38,160 ‎我们祈祷 这是真正的圣母 ‎人们会一直过来拜访 173 00:09:38,244 --> 00:09:40,124 ‎快吃吧 趁热吃 174 00:09:40,204 --> 00:09:41,544 ‎-是的 ‎-对 175 00:09:42,123 --> 00:09:43,623 ‎我去看看牛油果酱 176 00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:46,958 ‎没事吧 先生?您的圣水呢? 177 00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:48,920 ‎没有?好 178 00:09:49,005 --> 00:09:50,005 ‎嗨 179 00:09:50,089 --> 00:09:54,299 ‎你好 我是让米歇尔 来自海地 180 00:09:54,927 --> 00:09:56,467 ‎我要去加州 181 00:09:57,054 --> 00:09:59,434 ‎没关系 你不用交钱了 182 00:09:59,515 --> 00:10:02,475 ‎这不公平 每个人都要交钱 183 00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:04,480 ‎我不会要米歇尔的钱 184 00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:08,152 ‎我想你来这儿是请愿 ‎但愿能安全抵达美国? 185 00:10:08,232 --> 00:10:10,822 ‎她觉得你在机场会迷路 186 00:10:11,402 --> 00:10:12,402 ‎来 187 00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:15,109 ‎非常感谢 188 00:10:16,157 --> 00:10:18,617 ‎-这是什么人? ‎-怎么?嫉妒了? 189 00:10:18,701 --> 00:10:20,081 ‎为什么他可以免费? 190 00:10:20,161 --> 00:10:24,541 ‎他是个移民 千里迢迢来到这里 ‎肯定吃了很多苦 191 00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:28,674 ‎他肯定没地方过夜 ‎今晚我会让他睡我的房间 192 00:10:31,255 --> 00:10:34,625 ‎天啊!我觉得泰莉说得对 193 00:10:35,134 --> 00:10:36,764 ‎他一定受了很多苦 194 00:10:36,844 --> 00:10:39,764 ‎但上帝给我们的苦 ‎从来不会超出我们的能力 195 00:10:39,847 --> 00:10:42,927 ‎上帝让他成为黑人 ‎但作为交换 赐给了他礼物 196 00:10:43,017 --> 00:10:45,597 ‎擅长运动? 197 00:10:45,686 --> 00:10:47,186 ‎呃 这个也有 198 00:10:47,271 --> 00:10:48,771 ‎等等 珍妮 199 00:10:49,273 --> 00:10:51,613 ‎没听说过 WhatsApp的黑人平台吗? 200 00:10:55,029 --> 00:10:56,069 ‎看看? 201 00:10:56,155 --> 00:11:00,115 ‎比起这个 征服女人简直是浪费时间 202 00:11:00,201 --> 00:11:02,751 ‎“一旦试了黑人后 你就不想回头” 203 00:11:02,828 --> 00:11:05,748 ‎-女人信这个? ‎-我觉得是这个道理 204 00:11:05,831 --> 00:11:06,831 ‎我们可没有! 205 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:10,246 ‎黑男人阴茎大 女人只在乎尺寸 206 00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:14,256 ‎这是赤裸裸的种族和性别歧视 ‎都可以做成表情包了 207 00:11:14,340 --> 00:11:16,760 ‎这太20世纪了 你们太过时了 208 00:11:17,593 --> 00:11:19,683 ‎别理她 迭戈 她年纪太小 209 00:11:19,762 --> 00:11:23,102 ‎她以为阿尔维斯出名 ‎只是因为会踢球 210 00:11:23,182 --> 00:11:26,562 ‎就打个比方 动动脑子 211 00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:30,556 ‎你的 不用交钱 212 00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:34,857 ‎太长了 快速玫瑰念珠更好 213 00:11:34,944 --> 00:11:39,034 ‎上帝会快快地把你送入地狱 214 00:11:39,115 --> 00:11:41,365 ‎祈祷时 能跟你讲个事吗? 215 00:11:41,450 --> 00:11:45,370 ‎我正在看一部肥皂剧 ‎有个有钱的地主叫吉尔勒莫 216 00:11:45,454 --> 00:11:50,214 ‎和塞巴斯蒂安相爱 ‎塞巴斯蒂安没钱 但人很好 217 00:11:50,292 --> 00:11:55,212 ‎他当然也是白人 ‎在肥皂剧里 每个人都是白人 218 00:11:55,297 --> 00:11:57,377 ‎-活在象牙塔 ‎-为我们祈祷 219 00:11:57,466 --> 00:11:58,876 ‎赞美! 220 00:11:59,677 --> 00:12:03,217 ‎他们彼此相爱 但无法告诉其他镇民 221 00:12:04,348 --> 00:12:06,728 ‎他们决定保守秘密 222 00:12:07,601 --> 00:12:12,021 ‎塞巴斯蒂安是不是要给 ‎吉尔勒莫一点压力 帮他出柜? 223 00:12:12,106 --> 00:12:15,226 ‎如果圣母知道 全世界都知道 224 00:12:15,317 --> 00:12:16,437 ‎阿门 225 00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:23,332 ‎我需要一些神圣的建议 ‎我不是最好的天主教徒 226 00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:26,829 ‎从六岁起 就没在教堂里为您唱过歌 227 00:12:27,496 --> 00:12:30,366 ‎但是姥姥一直教导我 要敬仰您 228 00:12:31,250 --> 00:12:32,080 ‎您看 229 00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:33,338 ‎(克丽丝塔 求求你!) 230 00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:36,089 ‎克丽丝塔不回我的消息了 231 00:12:36,964 --> 00:12:38,844 ‎也许她觉得我是跟踪狂? 232 00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:42,885 ‎好吧 这都是社交媒体的错 233 00:12:43,721 --> 00:12:48,391 ‎但我从没想过伪装自己 234 00:12:53,647 --> 00:12:56,437 ‎不行 孩子们! 235 00:12:56,525 --> 00:13:01,065 ‎不能说:“老师我可以 ‎去商店买胶水吗?” 236 00:13:01,155 --> 00:13:04,575 ‎过来 237 00:13:05,075 --> 00:13:05,905 ‎太好了! 238 00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:10,326 ‎不过 那头驴的确很聪明 ‎驴不可貌相 239 00:13:10,414 --> 00:13:13,464 ‎没错 抖音办的很差劲 240 00:13:14,084 --> 00:13:16,254 ‎监视克丽丝塔也不对 241 00:13:17,338 --> 00:13:19,798 ‎(收到抖音消息) 242 00:13:23,677 --> 00:13:26,967 ‎你说得对!我会删除抖音账户 243 00:13:27,473 --> 00:13:29,523 ‎你太酷了 亲爱的圣母! 244 00:13:30,100 --> 00:13:31,140 ‎糟了 245 00:13:32,019 --> 00:13:36,569 ‎我知道他很俗气 ‎他也不喜欢雷鬼动音乐 对吧? 246 00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:40,689 ‎雷鬼动的确很难听 而且他也不坏 247 00:13:40,778 --> 00:13:45,028 ‎自从我和巴布罗一起逛以后 ‎我就远离了一切 248 00:13:45,115 --> 00:13:49,615 ‎没跟妈妈去商场或水疗中心 ‎也没用过信用卡 249 00:13:49,703 --> 00:13:52,833 ‎上次跟玛丽安娜去夜店是什么时候? 250 00:13:53,332 --> 00:13:55,962 ‎全都是因为巴布罗 251 00:13:58,504 --> 00:14:00,054 ‎我就知道你会回来的 252 00:14:00,631 --> 00:14:03,551 ‎你终于领悟到 我比你老公好? 253 00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:08,425 ‎小西 每次听到雷鬼动我都会想到你 254 00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:10,984 ‎虽然他不喜欢雷鬼动 255 00:14:11,058 --> 00:14:16,058 ‎宝贝 你只需要做一件事 ‎就能让我开心 256 00:14:16,772 --> 00:14:18,232 ‎你说 亲爱的 257 00:14:21,443 --> 00:14:22,493 ‎你会祈祷吗? 258 00:14:24,029 --> 00:14:25,109 ‎很好 259 00:14:25,197 --> 00:14:27,827 ‎不能和其他阶级一起混 260 00:14:28,534 --> 00:14:29,414 ‎我是这么认为的 261 00:14:29,493 --> 00:14:32,503 ‎天啊 爸爸 你听上去好像妈妈 262 00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:34,210 ‎也太夸张了 263 00:14:36,083 --> 00:14:37,173 ‎天啊! 264 00:14:38,544 --> 00:14:39,384 ‎天啊! 265 00:14:41,005 --> 00:14:42,505 ‎我也成了洛佩兹! 266 00:14:44,341 --> 00:14:46,341 ‎不可能!什么时候的事? 267 00:14:50,139 --> 00:14:52,059 ‎我想见你 268 00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:54,228 ‎当我想到你 269 00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:56,650 ‎重复穿?是不是太早了? 270 00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:58,729 ‎当我想到你 271 00:14:59,773 --> 00:15:02,863 ‎亲爱的 什么时候才能见到你? 272 00:15:02,943 --> 00:15:04,953 ‎什么时候? 273 00:15:05,863 --> 00:15:09,033 ‎没有你的温暖 日夜难眠 274 00:15:11,994 --> 00:15:13,334 ‎我知道那首歌 275 00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:18,332 ‎巴布罗老在唱这首歌 ‎你知道吗?我也挺喜欢这首歌 276 00:15:18,417 --> 00:15:20,747 ‎别告诉妈妈 她会宰了我 277 00:15:20,836 --> 00:15:22,206 ‎我懂 278 00:15:22,296 --> 00:15:25,046 ‎你妈觉得不能和低层阶级混 279 00:15:25,132 --> 00:15:27,642 ‎的确有点过了 280 00:15:27,718 --> 00:15:28,548 ‎没错 281 00:15:30,846 --> 00:15:31,966 ‎你怎么知道? 282 00:15:32,056 --> 00:15:36,056 ‎要是你妈发现了我的好朋友 ‎她也会宰了我 283 00:15:37,645 --> 00:15:38,725 ‎那当然 284 00:15:38,812 --> 00:15:41,612 ‎(玛丽安娜:还和那个跟踪狂一起混 ‎什么时候见个面?) 285 00:15:41,690 --> 00:15:43,980 ‎(克丽丝塔:抖音里的那位不是我) 286 00:15:44,068 --> 00:15:46,988 ‎(玛丽安娜: ‎你爸把他的账户删了?) 287 00:15:47,071 --> 00:15:49,621 ‎你把巴布罗的抖音账户删了? 288 00:15:49,698 --> 00:15:53,158 ‎我?没有啊?怎么操作我都不知道 289 00:15:55,037 --> 00:15:56,657 ‎他自己删了他的账户! 290 00:15:56,747 --> 00:15:58,457 ‎天!小巴布罗! 291 00:16:00,250 --> 00:16:02,000 ‎我得跟他道个歉 292 00:16:02,086 --> 00:16:04,416 ‎但有钱的孩子从不道歉 293 00:16:05,214 --> 00:16:06,054 ‎是吧? 294 00:16:08,008 --> 00:16:10,508 ‎非常感谢!来拿吧! 295 00:16:10,594 --> 00:16:14,104 ‎把圣水洒在照片上 发布到脸书 296 00:16:15,140 --> 00:16:17,850 ‎维珍可乐 官方饮料 297 00:16:17,935 --> 00:16:20,895 ‎售卖天堂圣母纪念帽 298 00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:24,270 ‎抱歉 圣母保佑 ‎我发誓 这都是为了爱情 299 00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:28,989 ‎站住 罪人! 300 00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:34,829 ‎抱歉!我发誓 圣母告诉我这么做 ‎她出现在我面前 就像在胡安面前 301 00:16:34,910 --> 00:16:35,790 ‎圣胡安迭戈? 302 00:16:35,869 --> 00:16:40,209 ‎那个印第安人 她说带锤子过来 ‎我觉得她想被赋予权力 303 00:16:40,290 --> 00:16:45,420 ‎赋权的人是我 ‎你会付出代价的 等着警察来吧! 304 00:16:45,504 --> 00:16:48,764 ‎他们让亵渎神明的白人陪个精光 305 00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:50,051 ‎-对不起 ‎-快走! 306 00:16:50,134 --> 00:16:52,974 ‎-快走! ‎-异端邪说 307 00:16:53,053 --> 00:16:55,723 ‎如果他们发现是漏水 我们就完了 308 00:16:55,806 --> 00:16:59,556 ‎我知道 亲爱的 ‎我们需要一个真正的奇迹 嘘 309 00:17:00,728 --> 00:17:04,608 ‎-这是恶魔 ‎-没问题 我们会帮你整好 310 00:17:04,690 --> 00:17:06,530 ‎她头上有角! 311 00:17:07,192 --> 00:17:10,782 ‎算了 我不会掺和这种事 312 00:17:10,863 --> 00:17:11,993 ‎别… 313 00:17:13,407 --> 00:17:14,277 ‎靠! 314 00:17:14,366 --> 00:17:16,536 ‎(自愿捐赠) 315 00:17:19,079 --> 00:17:22,289 ‎-邪教徒!罪人! ‎-放我走 求你了 316 00:17:22,374 --> 00:17:23,714 ‎-你这个坏人! ‎-求你了 317 00:17:23,792 --> 00:17:28,212 ‎-你把他弄到哪里? ‎-别玩了 这又是你的把戏 318 00:17:28,297 --> 00:17:29,127 ‎我的把戏? 319 00:17:29,214 --> 00:17:31,434 ‎没错 警察会让他坦白 320 00:17:31,508 --> 00:17:34,968 ‎他的每个孔都会灌上水刑 321 00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:36,144 ‎鼻子不会 322 00:17:36,221 --> 00:17:38,681 ‎跟我没关系 他是个无神论者 323 00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:41,806 ‎所以我炒了他 不再教克丽丝塔开车 324 00:17:41,894 --> 00:17:46,074 ‎他不怕上帝 带他去警察局也没用 325 00:17:46,732 --> 00:17:48,822 ‎再说了 警察会相信我 还是你? 326 00:17:48,901 --> 00:17:51,401 ‎这是最新款的4T手机 咱们走着瞧 327 00:17:51,487 --> 00:17:55,447 ‎在神社卖票是违法的 ‎所以我让罗伯毁了她 328 00:17:55,532 --> 00:17:59,292 ‎你的录音坦白足以让你负责 329 00:17:59,369 --> 00:18:00,789 ‎送你去地狱 330 00:18:01,413 --> 00:18:04,883 ‎我会告诉你家人 你偷走了我的房子 331 00:18:04,958 --> 00:18:05,998 ‎怎么样? 332 00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:09,455 ‎记住了 我也有一段视频 333 00:18:09,546 --> 00:18:11,296 ‎厄内斯托会直接甩了你 334 00:18:11,381 --> 00:18:15,141 ‎为了你的情人 你欠下巨额赔偿 335 00:18:15,219 --> 00:18:17,809 ‎麻烦了 亲爱的 336 00:18:17,888 --> 00:18:21,138 ‎伯托不想买我们的房子了 337 00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:24,135 ‎原来那个圣母是水渍 338 00:18:24,228 --> 00:18:27,938 ‎太可惜了! ‎现在你得把房子卖给我! 339 00:18:28,023 --> 00:18:30,863 ‎什么时候你们家才能想清楚 340 00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:34,073 ‎你们永远住不起这里 341 00:18:34,154 --> 00:18:37,204 ‎这就是人生 ‎不是你的错 也不是我的错 342 00:18:37,282 --> 00:18:40,492 ‎都是你的错 ‎本来你可以让我们安宁生活 343 00:18:40,577 --> 00:18:42,697 ‎当然不是我的错!这里是墨西哥 344 00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:46,996 ‎-有钱人向来都占上风 ‎-我们走着瞧 345 00:18:48,168 --> 00:18:50,208 ‎瞧什么? 346 00:18:50,712 --> 00:18:54,802 ‎-亲爱的… ‎-笨蛋!离我远点! 347 00:18:54,883 --> 00:18:55,723 ‎亲爱的 348 00:19:01,765 --> 00:19:03,385 ‎为什么偷窥我? 349 00:19:04,810 --> 00:19:08,150 ‎我只是想看看…你的有多大 350 00:19:11,108 --> 00:19:12,188 ‎好吧 351 00:19:12,943 --> 00:19:15,953 ‎给我看你的 我就给你看我的 352 00:19:17,364 --> 00:19:18,414 ‎一 353 00:19:19,074 --> 00:19:20,994 ‎-二 ‎-三! 354 00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:24,866 ‎嘿 355 00:19:26,331 --> 00:19:27,621 ‎怎么回事? 356 00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:29,418 ‎不是你想的那样 357 00:19:29,501 --> 00:19:32,381 ‎我只想确认一下关于黑人的说法 358 00:19:32,462 --> 00:19:33,802 ‎-什么? ‎-什么? 359 00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:38,590 ‎-我走了 ‎-你太过分了 360 00:19:40,053 --> 00:19:40,893 ‎泰莉! 361 00:19:42,055 --> 00:19:44,015 ‎让米歇尔! 362 00:19:44,558 --> 00:19:45,428 ‎这是… 363 00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:48,976 ‎这是你的食物 364 00:19:50,439 --> 00:19:51,609 ‎你不是移民啊! 365 00:19:52,232 --> 00:19:57,242 ‎不 我们车友俱乐部 ‎正沿着泛美公路旅行 366 00:19:57,321 --> 00:19:59,951 ‎正好路过这儿 顺便见个朋友 367 00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:02,532 ‎那你为什么呆在我家? 368 00:20:03,410 --> 00:20:08,830 ‎我以为可以跟你们三人行 ‎但你们不过是种族主义者 369 00:20:10,584 --> 00:20:11,924 ‎我的背包呢 370 00:20:21,929 --> 00:20:23,349 ‎至少我猜对了 371 00:20:24,723 --> 00:20:25,933 ‎他有个大家伙 372 00:20:42,407 --> 00:20:45,197 ‎(至厄内斯托 ‎我们是史上最棒的球队 老赫) 373 00:20:45,285 --> 00:20:49,285 ‎西尔维娅找到你 ‎就会知道我们是好朋友 374 00:20:54,461 --> 00:20:55,341 ‎嗨 375 00:20:56,296 --> 00:20:58,546 ‎克丽丝塔 我不应该… 376 00:20:58,632 --> 00:21:02,182 ‎在我走之前 ‎我要告诉你一件重要的事 377 00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:04,471 ‎对我来说 很难做到这一点 378 00:21:05,389 --> 00:21:08,019 ‎-听着 好吗? ‎-但我需要跟你说… 379 00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:09,100 ‎别! 380 00:21:10,227 --> 00:21:14,437 ‎我发现玛丽安娜和这些朋友 ‎不是我的真朋友 381 00:21:14,523 --> 00:21:15,983 ‎我跟你讲过了 382 00:21:16,066 --> 00:21:19,236 ‎让我说完 拜托 ‎我也明白了 你… 383 00:21:20,946 --> 00:21:23,116 ‎是我最好的朋友 384 00:21:23,782 --> 00:21:25,702 ‎-什么? ‎-最好的朋友 385 00:21:27,244 --> 00:21:30,044 ‎-什么? ‎-你是我最好的朋友 386 00:21:32,207 --> 00:21:34,167 ‎-真的吗? ‎-真的 387 00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:36,497 ‎不用了 388 00:21:37,045 --> 00:21:38,915 ‎我们不是好朋友吗? 389 00:21:39,006 --> 00:21:42,296 ‎-是的 但有几个阶段 ‎-阶段? 390 00:21:42,384 --> 00:21:45,804 ‎首先 我们要相互沟通 ‎然后 相互拥抱 391 00:21:46,972 --> 00:21:48,892 ‎然后交换衣物 392 00:21:48,974 --> 00:21:50,354 ‎也许不用做这一段 393 00:21:50,434 --> 00:21:54,444 ‎直到最后 你才能发布我们的友谊 394 00:21:55,147 --> 00:21:56,107 ‎明白吗? 395 00:21:56,189 --> 00:21:59,939 ‎-明白了 ‎-我得走了 396 00:22:00,027 --> 00:22:04,407 ‎-去哪里? ‎-和玛丽安娜去一趟图卢姆 397 00:22:04,489 --> 00:22:07,909 ‎-但她不是你的朋友 ‎-别这么评价我 我很难 398 00:22:08,535 --> 00:22:10,785 ‎你是我最好的朋友 请支持我 399 00:22:12,289 --> 00:22:13,329 ‎好吧 400 00:22:14,207 --> 00:22:15,827 ‎旅途愉快 401 00:22:15,917 --> 00:22:16,837 ‎谢谢 402 00:22:20,297 --> 00:22:21,127 ‎再见 403 00:22:29,056 --> 00:22:34,516 ‎-你确定是这个吗 女士? ‎-我确定 别叫我女士 404 00:22:35,979 --> 00:22:38,399 ‎这招儿绝对会让她把房子卖给我 405 00:22:45,947 --> 00:22:47,447 ‎天呐! 406 00:22:51,036 --> 00:22:52,656 ‎(至厄内斯托 老赫) 407 00:22:58,710 --> 00:23:00,300 ‎迭戈!克丽丝塔! 408 00:23:01,797 --> 00:23:02,797 ‎小西!卡妲! 409 00:23:12,349 --> 00:23:17,059 ‎原谅我 亲爱的圣母 ‎我不像他们那样虔诚 410 00:23:17,979 --> 00:23:19,769 ‎我无法无底线地容忍下去 411 00:23:20,774 --> 00:23:23,244 ‎对一切感到内疚 412 00:23:23,318 --> 00:23:26,698 ‎那张券来自西尔维娅的提包 ‎但上帝希望我中奖 413 00:23:26,780 --> 00:23:30,660 ‎我从来不告诉家人这件事 ‎知道为什么吗? 414 00:23:31,368 --> 00:23:35,828 ‎我不想让他们觉得 ‎自己不属于这里 415 00:23:41,128 --> 00:23:41,958 ‎真的! 416 00:23:53,473 --> 00:23:54,353 ‎我的上帝! 417 00:23:56,768 --> 00:23:57,688 ‎天呐! 418 00:24:02,274 --> 00:24:03,284 ‎怎么了? 419 00:24:03,900 --> 00:24:08,780 ‎-这是我们抢救出来的财物 ‎-衣服必须得重复穿 420 00:24:08,864 --> 00:24:09,704 ‎别说了 421 00:24:10,949 --> 00:24:12,369 ‎可以和你们一起住吗? 422 00:24:12,451 --> 00:24:14,701 ‎西尔维娅看到我的球服了吗? 423 00:24:15,454 --> 00:24:19,254 ‎不好意思 你们中有人实在太难闻了 424 00:24:19,332 --> 00:24:20,422 ‎你们怎么在这里? 425 00:24:21,084 --> 00:24:24,634 ‎这栋房子要臭掉 ‎淹没在未处理的污水中 426 00:24:25,172 --> 00:24:26,342 ‎闻闻 427 00:24:26,423 --> 00:24:27,383 ‎是你啊 428 00:24:28,633 --> 00:24:31,303 ‎多亏了你 我们的房子被臭水淹了 429 00:24:32,012 --> 00:24:33,762 ‎现在我们没地方住 430 00:24:34,556 --> 00:24:37,636 ‎不可能 你们要干嘛? 431 00:24:37,726 --> 00:24:40,846 ‎想成为这里的笑柄吗? 432 00:24:41,521 --> 00:24:43,941 ‎即便上演真人秀 也救不了我们 433 00:24:44,024 --> 00:24:46,864 ‎你会和驴睡地上吗? 434 00:24:46,943 --> 00:24:50,033 ‎我不在乎 比起你 我们跟他们更安全 435 00:24:50,113 --> 00:24:53,333 ‎-天啊! ‎-也太便宜他了 436 00:24:53,408 --> 00:24:56,748 ‎你想当烈士自便 ‎卡妲 跟我走 437 00:24:56,828 --> 00:24:58,538 ‎我爱上了泰莉 438 00:25:00,165 --> 00:25:01,035 ‎谁? 439 00:25:01,124 --> 00:25:03,294 ‎所以 我想瞧瞧米歇尔的裸体 440 00:25:03,376 --> 00:25:06,046 ‎谁的裸体? 441 00:25:06,129 --> 00:25:08,469 ‎看我是否跟他有得一拼 442 00:25:08,548 --> 00:25:11,548 ‎因为西尔维娅 我不敢告诉你 443 00:25:11,635 --> 00:25:14,345 ‎你终于承认了 你为我痴狂 444 00:25:14,429 --> 00:25:17,389 ‎不可能 没人会为你痴狂 445 00:25:17,474 --> 00:25:19,734 ‎看看你自己 别丢脸了 446 00:25:19,809 --> 00:25:21,519 ‎说谁呢 447 00:25:21,603 --> 00:25:23,773 ‎我和赫纳罗是好朋友 448 00:25:23,855 --> 00:25:25,065 ‎-什么? ‎-什么? 449 00:25:25,148 --> 00:25:26,778 ‎这不是真的 450 00:25:26,858 --> 00:25:27,728 ‎等一下 451 00:25:28,818 --> 00:25:33,238 ‎我们只是好朋友 ‎还喜欢同一部肥皂剧 对吧? 452 00:25:33,949 --> 00:25:37,369 ‎这是你写给我的 太漂亮了 453 00:25:38,453 --> 00:25:40,543 ‎多亏了你 把它毁了 454 00:25:40,622 --> 00:25:42,712 ‎我可以解释一下 455 00:25:42,791 --> 00:25:47,591 ‎都是蕾奥娜的错 ‎她觉得自己可以住在这里 456 00:25:47,671 --> 00:25:50,261 ‎你是老几? 457 00:25:50,340 --> 00:25:54,050 ‎厄内斯托 只有她把房子卖出去 458 00:25:54,135 --> 00:25:55,675 ‎搬走后 我们才能安宁 459 00:25:56,388 --> 00:26:00,888 ‎我们会留下来的 ‎房子不卖给你 也不卖给任何人 460 00:26:00,976 --> 00:26:04,896 ‎蕾奥娜 你和那个金发女郎吵架 ‎我们就得陪着穷下去? 461 00:26:04,980 --> 00:26:08,320 ‎会有办法的 都住了六个月 462 00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:11,110 ‎卖掉房子才能改善家人的生活 463 00:26:11,194 --> 00:26:14,204 ‎-没错 ‎-没有尊严的财富不叫财富 464 00:26:14,281 --> 00:26:17,701 ‎-是的 但尊严吃不饱啊 ‎-对 465 00:26:17,784 --> 00:26:20,794 ‎好学校呢?你根本不在乎我们 466 00:26:20,870 --> 00:26:21,710 ‎的确 467 00:26:21,788 --> 00:26:25,328 ‎她根本不在乎你们 ‎因为她疯了! 468 00:26:25,417 --> 00:26:27,167 ‎我们得谈谈 469 00:26:27,252 --> 00:26:28,672 ‎我跟她一起搬走 470 00:26:31,339 --> 00:26:33,549 ‎大家静一静! 471 00:26:35,260 --> 00:26:38,050 ‎美女 472 00:26:38,138 --> 00:26:41,468 ‎跟我聊聊你的感受 473 00:26:42,350 --> 00:26:45,690 ‎跟我聊聊 美女 474 00:26:45,770 --> 00:26:47,440 ‎聊聊你自己 475 00:26:47,522 --> 00:26:48,862 ‎和过往情人 476 00:26:48,940 --> 00:26:52,280 ‎-这唱歌的家伙是谁? ‎-我不知道 477 00:26:53,737 --> 00:26:55,157 ‎-她的人 ‎-什么? 478 00:26:55,947 --> 00:26:57,197 ‎是她的情人 479 00:26:57,282 --> 00:26:58,832 ‎-蕾奥娜! ‎-什么? 480 00:26:59,409 --> 00:27:00,659 ‎他不是我的情人 481 00:27:02,704 --> 00:27:03,714 ‎是的 482 00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:07,000 ‎这人爱上了我 483 00:27:08,043 --> 00:27:12,013 ‎厄内斯托 迭戈 孩子们 都进去吧 484 00:27:12,797 --> 00:27:13,627 ‎走吧 485 00:27:14,633 --> 00:27:16,343 ‎你在这里干嘛? 486 00:27:16,426 --> 00:27:19,796 ‎自重一点 小子! ‎你不懂 487 00:27:19,888 --> 00:27:22,808 ‎滚出去!走开 488 00:27:24,309 --> 00:27:25,189 ‎天啊! 489 00:27:26,478 --> 00:27:27,478 ‎蕾奥娜 你别进来 490 00:27:30,065 --> 00:27:31,185 ‎叛徒! 491 00:27:33,276 --> 00:27:35,146 ‎你们俩无论怎样 492 00:27:35,236 --> 00:27:38,366 ‎都只顾自己 只顾和对方斗争 493 00:27:39,366 --> 00:27:42,986 ‎你让我们觉得 梦想指日可待 494 00:27:43,620 --> 00:27:46,370 ‎实际上 你只顾自己 495 00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:50,170 ‎没你们的斗争 496 00:27:50,835 --> 00:27:53,125 ‎我们两家会过得更好 497 00:27:55,423 --> 00:27:57,263 ‎西尔维娅 你也别来 498 00:27:57,342 --> 00:28:00,642 ‎你们俩住被臭水淹的房子 499 00:28:02,472 --> 00:28:04,312 ‎你们愚蠢的斗争毁了一切 500 00:28:10,230 --> 00:28:11,650 ‎什么? 501 00:28:13,191 --> 00:28:16,191 ‎别以为我会感谢你 502 00:28:16,277 --> 00:28:18,357 ‎想都没想到 你会谢我 503 00:28:19,447 --> 00:28:20,947 ‎这么做不只是为了你 504 00:28:22,033 --> 00:28:26,453 ‎-如果厄内斯托知道你和罗伯的事 ‎-你家人发现奖券的事 505 00:28:27,205 --> 00:28:29,415 ‎穷人太自私 506 00:28:29,499 --> 00:28:34,299 ‎富人总会想方设法把责任推给穷人 507 00:28:36,339 --> 00:28:37,839 ‎我去主卧室! 508 00:28:37,924 --> 00:28:40,344 ‎什么?不能睡我的床! 509 00:28:40,427 --> 00:28:42,047 ‎你敢? 510 00:28:42,762 --> 00:28:44,062 ‎-快跑! ‎-恶心 511 00:28:44,139 --> 00:28:47,229 ‎-快跑!臭死了 ‎-天! 512 00:28:48,226 --> 00:28:49,266 ‎好家伙! 513 00:28:50,061 --> 00:28:51,061 ‎我的上帝! 514 00:28:51,646 --> 00:28:53,976 ‎宝贝 别进来 在这里等着 515 00:28:55,942 --> 00:28:57,152 ‎回家去! 516 00:32:06,591 --> 00:32:10,511 ‎字幕翻譯:郑佳音