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It's believed that Earth was formed around 4.54 billion years ago.
Life forms were simple. There was only bacteria then.
- BACILLUS: I WANT TO REPRODUCE. - COCCUS: OKAY.
We needed some action that was excessively given by dinosaurs 245 million years ago.
They destroyed everything and fought over food until chaos was all around.
180 million years later, they were kicked out of Earth and went extinct.
Then, we humans appeared 200,000 years ago.
We were the planet's weakest creatures and easy prey for all predators.
We had no superpowers and feared darkness, which made us think out of the box.
We realized that in order to survive, we have to work as a team.
We formed societies, built houses, and created defense and attack strategies
until we dominated the whole planet.
As it's in our nature to be greedy, we caged the birds.
We slayed deer to hang their heads on our walls.
We stole ivory from elephants and turned it into piano keys.
We locked up the animals just to entertain these people.
Mother, Mother! Look, it's a lion.
It looks like a cat.
- Dear kitten. - Stop it.
After we'd settled and had found peace,
we felt bored again, as we had nothing to fill our time.
So we started fighting each other.
The first step was to divide society into classes.
One class creates issues for the one below while complaining about the one above.
The oppressed wait for a chance to go up the class ladder
to avenge all the oppression they had when they were below.
Show me the documents.
Where’s the signature of the assistant secretary of the topography department?
- This is it. - It must be in HD, it's not clear enough.
You can come back at judgment day and I'll do it for you.
Or I will see you in Hell.
The second step was to distract people's minds with trifle matters,
like relationships and their problems,
horoscopes, jinn, fortune telling, marriage, lineage and creating parties.
They eventually became obsessed.
They then created laws and rules that prevented them from leading a normal life.
I promise to give your daughter the life she dreams of.
What's your surname?
- Xao Ling. - Ling the farmer?
Get out of here.
Humans separated and were distracted by the rules of modern society.
There are only two classes now, the strong and the weak.
Both were partly demoralized.
- Do your work! Come on! - I lied to him.
- You over there! - I stole his money.
What a fool!
- Family is the main priority. - Our people are better.
No one says a word.
These are all victims of modern societal pressure.
- It's Sociedad Police Department. - Hello. Is it a police officer?
Yes. I'd just been a boy in blue before I was promoted to be an officer.
I followed a group of bastard thieves for eight months, so I got my promotion.
Do you want to hear the whole story?
No, thanks. I was in need of such information indeed.
- What do you want? - I want to report an incident.
An assault case.
- My father is a bit hotheaded. - Why is he like that?
I chose to go to Art College, and he didn't accept that.
He said this specialization is not for men.
He said I have to go to the Physical Fitness college and become a man.
- Well said. - What did you say?
Do you know what's good about being a physical fitness trainer?
What a magnificent thing!
It's the national anthem, students. Stand by!
Are you asleep? Stand by! Stand down!
You look like dead people who have been sleeping for ages.
Do you think I'm not as young and fit as you are?
Stand by! Stand down!
Many are wondering why we queue up every morning.
It has many benefits that I'm unaware of up to this moment.
But I'm sure I will be soon. I think the principal has a point of view
and he knows things that we don't know. Stand down!
You two aren't abiding by the rules!
Red shoes!
You have the Marines Haircut!
You're suspended. Parents' summoning.
It's wonderful to be a Physical Education teacher.
But this is not what I aspire to.
I want to draw. Come and get a drawing, sweetheart!
Oh man!
It's not in your job description to tell me who's the man here. Is it?
You want to tell me what to do?
Do you want a bigger surprise?
I'm your father!
It's Shorehedan Police Station. How can I help?
I just wanted to tell you that I have the best, most sensitive father ever.
- He's the most caring father out there. - Your father went home.
No need to worry. You have to be confident as long as you do the right thing.
He's supposed to fear me as I'm 17 years old now.
Muhammad Ali got an Olympic medal when he was 18.
My dad is in his fifties, so we'll fight and see.
Dana. Hello, sweetheart.
- Hello, sweetheart. - We'll be married soon. I promise.
- When? - Maybe next week.
- But we met two days ago. - That's enough for me.
- It feels like ages. - I feel like I've known you for ages too.
- Tell me about yourself. - Once upon a time, I hit a man.
- Really? - I drive so fast.
- No kidding! - Once, I punched a man and took his car.
- I can't believe it. - I had my first cigarette when I was ten.
- When did you first go clubbing? - When I was an embryo.
- Are you serious? - Yes.
- How old were you? - Four months old.
- Have you seen jinn before? - Yes, I have.
- When? - It was a long time ago.
Come. Your father wants to talk to you.
Delicious soup! Did you make it?
It's canned soup.
I thought it was. The water isn't hot enough.
The bowl is neatly carved too.
I mean you and my father are the best parents. God bless you!
You've come to an age, Taufeeq, when it's time
to choose the path you want to walk.
For this reason, we'll grant you the freedom to choose.
You don't have to be a PE teacher.
Science is for geniuses, and literature is for fools.
You know what you're capable of.
So you have to choose between Law School or Political Sciences College.
You won't be a lawyer as their job is to lie.
Nor a businessman as you're no good at projects.
You're no good at project management.
You'll go to the Political Sciences College.
Marion University has difficult courses.
Attende College requires attendance.
- You will go to Addis Ababa College. - The professors can be bribed there.
- They help students to pass. - You'll graduate and be a professor.
At 19, you'll become the don.
- You'll pay all your debts back. - You'll be able to afford fancy clothes.
- Remember when you wet the bed? - Pay for the bedsheets you wet.
You retire at 60 and you'll still have ten years to live.
You can do whatever you want.
What are you talking about? Remember when I posted your bail?
And when you broke Aunt Rawia's glass cups?
And the World Cup ball that you destroyed?
Are you old enough to think about your future? Go to your room!
- Get lost! - To your room!
We missed his funeral plan.
I know someone who can get us a discount from the cemetery.
The weather is good.
I need a partner
and a lot of money
and more clothes and some tours around the world.
Visiting the Maldives.
The nature of Austria.
Sharm El-Sheikh's sun.
Broadway shows.
I need all these things.
Thank God, as there are many people who don't even have blankets.
There are two types of blankets. One is made of wool, the other is of hair.
- The one made of wool is expensive. - Prices have gone up lately.
Your best choice would be average-quality goods.
Second-rate goods? I was top of the class in third grade. And you?
I ranked third when I was in second grade.
I was in the second row...
at Tamer's concert.
What were we talking about?
Where did the sun rise from today?
Write it down.
Where did the sun rise from today?
Write it down.
Well, your loss.
- I like it here but I want to live abroad. - What do you mean?
When I travel abroad, I miss home. However, I don't like to come back.
I want to take my country abroad with me.
Let's go to the self-improvement workshop.
I'M A HERO BUT NOBODY DISCOVERED IT CENTER
You have an inner power that no one's aware of.
You have frequencies and ions inside, and there's a submicroscopic power too.
You're all millionaires. Even you, Kheiria.
Me?
Don't say you're a loser.
Say I didn't make it instead. Start over.
You're a cheat who gets money from his father.
How ridiculous! I didn't take any money from my father.
The proof is that I waited for his death to get my inheritance.
Get him out, guards.
You'll face many obstacles in your life.
But keep in mind that there's no gain without pain.
Ashwaq said you had plastic surgery to your nose? Is it true?
Yes, I'm full of opportunities.
We move to your questions.
Dr. Sayad, how could you manage...
Ask yourselves and you'll get the right answers.
He's inspiring indeed.
Truly, he encouraged me to start everything over.
Me too, especially when he said that we're all millionaires.
Even Kheiria!
- Yes, this was his main topic. - I totally agree with you.
- Marvelous! - Where do we start the change from?
I feel empty inside.
Don't say that! You can start with something central in your life.
Something that your being is about.
Such as your Instagram account.
That's it. Your biography on Instagram.
- What should I write? - Do you like coffee?
- Yes. - Say you're a caffeine addict.
That's very unique. I'm sure no one has added this to his biography before.
Do you feel that there's someone like you in this world?
- Of course not. - Use a unicorn emoji then.
This is the first time anyone has done this.
Use a ring emoji to tease those who aren't married yet.
I'll write "married to a prince and mother of two angels."
- You're amazing. - May God keep the envious away.
They're angels indeed.
Taufeeq!
Did you talk to your father about marriage?
We've known each other for three whole days.
It feels like three years indeed.
- You feel the same? - I won't go to art college.
I will consult more people about that. I'll consult young people like myself.
Of course. Experience is important.
Okay. Goodbye.
- You're cheating. - This is how it's played.
- You stupid! - Stop going to the cafe and go to work.
When will the latest update be available? When will it be available?
It's available. I can sleep now.
Madrid! Madrid!
What major should I choose, guys?
Nutrition, dentistry, anatomy, business management, facilities and supplies.
Refrigeration cooling.
You look tired.
Let's change the topic. I ran two kilometers this morning.
- What do you mean? - I ran seven kilometers.
I ran 12 kilometers.
I started running five kilometers at the beginning of this month.
- This is my first run. - I ran six kilometers at my first run.
I ran two kilometers in three minutes.
- My friend is running a marathon. - My cousin is a joke!
- I'm just a bit tired. It's no big deal. - Because you're a joke!
- He feels tired. - This isn't the measure.
- You need to be in good shape. - What's wrong with you?
I can totally beat you up.
- I'm better than you. - We're all better than you.
How many planets are there in our solar system?
I think there are 11 planets.
We're talking about planets, not football.
There are six without the moon, right?
Six? The devil's number?
I told you the planets are a conspiracy.
No. They are Mercury, Saturn, Japan and Zoomooruda.
- There are just four planets. - Are there any hookah flavor blends?
Don't be lazy. Go and start a project by uploading some videos on Instagram.
Videos that talk about brands.
And about editing content.
And changing the page.
- Want to join the European Union? - New hookah flavor blends?
Continue your study abroad.
How did we miss that?
- How will he leave his family alone? - He'll live abroad.
Do you need a friend in London? I'll go with you.
I'll go too. We're three now.
Three?
Trilateral like a pyramid?
This means bad omens. It means the one-eyed man will show up soon.
I'll come too, to make it quadrilateral.
- What major should I choose? - Choose a Mathematics major.
A special major which is highly required.
It's a unique major.
Einstein and Descartes both excelled at this major.
Are they better than you?
I wonder what they would make if they were alive in this era.
In a new world, trucks would seem so real.
Even in the old world, my friend. I always wanted to meet Newton.
But I'm not good at Math.
Is anyone born a scientist?
A thousand-mile journey begins with a single step.
As the saying goes, instead of doing it now, why not wait till tomorrow?
As the saying goes, ships are moved by wind... They always are.
Do you want to come with me?
- Move your elbow! - I put my arm there first!
You stink!
Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the flight to Corten Ville.
Thanks for telling us. We weren't aware of our destination.
Sorry for the late takeoff.
My name is Hana, and I'll be your flight attendant.
- No one asked. - We're comforted that you said your name.
- I feel you're close to us. - Can you love my son more than me?
The plane's crew and I are here to ensure you enjoy the flight this morning.
What are you going to do?
Please fasten your seatbelts
and don't smoke when the No Smoking sign lights up.
- So will the sign stop lighting up? - No.
What then?
If there's anything I can do to make this flight more enjoyable and safer--
Take off already!
When is the takeoff?
Let's go!
- Captain. - We're taking off. They're idiots.
Whether you fasten your seatbelts or not, it won't help you if we crash.
If there is a problem with the engine, put on the ventilator.
It'll give you six extra minutes
to say bye to those next to you before the crash.
There were 1,525 plane crashes from 1959 till 2015.
The number of casualties during that period was 29,165.
If the engine blows up, you can jump. And then the other engine will suck you in
and turn you into lasagna in the stratosphere.
If you want to be special, wear a life jacket.
The formula will change a bit,
and you'll become lasagna with plastic on top.
Enjoy your flight.
TWO HOURS LATER...
Peace be upon you, passengers. This is your captain.
I'll be giving you trivial information.
We are now at an altitude of 33,000 feet above sea level.
The temperature is minus 42, in case you wanted to jump.
Continue with your lunch.
Man, check how they live peacefully. And everyone minds their own business.
When will we learn from them?
What's this? What you pray for?!
Buddha? You know what Buddha means in my country?
Ice cream!
- Zlem, let's go. - You pray Buddha, we eat Buddha.
Funny, right?
Good.
DEPORTED MORON UNFIT FOR HUMAN INTERACTION
You have beautiful girl... blondes.
Sine squared divided by 12
minus the length of the base cubed divided by four.
There's still plenty of time.
- Studying? - Yes! Sine squared divided by 12...
Parallelogram, each side...
Parallelogram?!
It has four triangles!
The Illuminati plan has been completed! The end is nigh!
Every two opposing sides are the same. Every two opposing angles are the same.
HARD WORK PAYS OFF
Hey, buddy! The weather here is the same as the weather on your side, right?
It is the same!
What a nut!
- Want to study together? - Where?
- Starbucks. - Okay.
- Really? All right. - Really.
- My friend and brother! - My buddy!
- My brother's brother! - My sister's brother!
- My close friend. - My valuable friend!
- What have you been up to? - Nothing much.
Still in Barcelona?
- No, I left. - Really?
- Two hours starting now. - Let's study.
- X and z, four centimeters. - Z and y, three centimeters.
- The area equals the base multiplied by... - The area equals the base multiplied by...
Write 45 and a heart of love.
You know what it means? Heart of love.
- She's one of us. - You can tell from the way she speaks.
They like cream a lot. "Mocha, double-cream."
- Remember Umoud? - How is Obaid?
- He's in the past now. - A good friend.
- Yes, a close brother. - No, a brother of a close brother.
- I hope he's well. - Let's study.
When you stick the compass needle at y, draw an arch, brother.
Open the compass.
- Remember it? - Yes, the trip to Colorado!
- With our brother Salloum. - Our brother's brother.
- My sister's brother. My brother. - Brother of my sister's heart. My brother.
- Why? - We studied a lot, doctor, my brother!
- My brother's brother. - The dear one.
- No, my close friend. My brother. - My brother.
Don't worry, Taufeeq. We'll find another university.
Maybe the doctor wanted you to subtract six centimeters from the 12 cm sides.
So you'll have six and six as well as the subtracted six. Three sixes!
- A diabolical number! - Please shut up.
I want to draw! Let me draw you! Man!
Science is for the smart, and literature is for the stupid.
And you know yourself.
Did you talk to your dad about the marriage?
Yes, we've been together for three days now.
But they were more like three years!
Do you have new vape flavors?
Don't be lazy. Start a project and upload videos to Instagram.
True. That's it.
That's what I want.
It needs marketing. The application needs to be accepted.
- Empower animal resources. - Want to get in the European Union?
I'll finish my paperwork tomorrow.
THREE YEARS LATER
NAJAH COMMERCIAL COMMITTEE FOR ROBBING YOU
"YOU WON'T GET IT DONE"
Excuse me, I was allowed to work.
I've met all terms. I just need your stamp, please.
- What? - My nephew,
the colonel of the police station in Wakanda, didn't sign it.
- But there's no space left, look. - Let him sign here.
It won't take long. A month, approximately.
A human being lives for 65 years.
You want me to waste a month on this signature?
On top of the 34 months that I spent to finish it?
It's okay, a month isn't much. Check the line behind you.
All of them are waiting.
He's been doing one piece of paperwork for two months now.
And this one... I forgot how long he's been here.
He's breathing! See, he's still alive.
There's no danger.
AMBEEH INSTITUTE FOR FRAUD
100% PROFIT WITH NO LAUNDRY
Excuse me, my idea is to upload videos to Instagram to teach drawing that are--
With a post on Instagram it's 2,000.
We have a model in case you want to advertise a product.
What are her modeling qualifications?
None. It was just her dream since she was a little girl.
- May God protect our daughters and yours. - I don't have any, I'm not married.
Take her then.
Marry her.
Come! Pay a dowry!
Give us money!
What's your problem?
- I want to use the bathroom. - Thirty dinars.
- Where's the door? - Twenty-five dinars.
If you want a curtain, it's 15.
- No, I don't. - Half a curtain? Half a door? What?
- I want a door. - Here.
- What am I to do with it? - Installment is 12.
I bought it believing it would be ready.
Oh, right. Something to change the mood comes with it.
- Really? - Go on, get in!
You know, the mood thing is for real. It's for 18 dinars.
- The lock is broken. - Now it's 22.
Or 40 if you want it new.
Hello, I'm Taufeeq.
I'll teach you the basics of drawing facial expressions easily.
- Nice! - Wow!
- Taufeeq did it! - Excellent.
Keep up the good work!
- A child drew this. - It's a cliche.
- Is this a face or a tombstone? - Change the background!
The distance between the eyebrows is equal to the distance
between our country and the Great Wall.
You're fun. Send me your Snapchat, darling.
If Picasso had known about you, he would've become a pharmacist.
SAHI CENTER FOR PSYCHOLOGICAL STUDIES
Doctor, I'm trying to do the only thing I know how to do.
But people are bullying me.
How tall are you?
Doctor, I'm upset. Check what they've typed to me.
The Internet is a difficult world, Taufeeq.
Everyone is an expert commenter, a director, a photographer,
a painter, a fighter, and understands the strategies of life.
But if you want the truth,
your drawing was a joke!
- What's wrong? - They're mocking me.
That's because you're a joke!
Enough.
Girls, let's play Truth.
What're my flaws? I forgive.
It eats me from the inside, but I don't like to discuss it.
I keep it inside of me, but I don't keep grudges.
Grudges eat away at one's lifespan, so I hate no one.
Why would I hate? It's better to let them go.
I can keep it inside of me, but inside of my heart?
One sweet word makes me forget everything.
But I still remember what happened.
Don't completely forget and don't remember everything.
If you hold a grudge, don't hold it in your hearts.
Don't ever hate anyone, even if they hurt you.
Look at what Maha did to me!
That terrible woman! May her family face evil!
But do I hate her? No. Go on, ask me.
Muna, what's your biggest fear?
Let's not talk about these things, please.
You know that I'm scared of ghosts and spiders?
Let me tell you a story.
Come back! Where are you going?
I think it's hard for them to reach my intellectual level.
Dana, are you attending the class of Academic Research Basics?
Yes, and you are Jana, Marwa's cousin?
Yes, but it's weird that you aren't with her. Why are you alone?
- Marwa and I fought. - Why?
She customized me on Snapchat.
- I'm not on good terms with her either. - Why?
She likes the guy I like.
- Shall we become friends? - Of course, dear.
- What's up? - We don't like Marwa.
I also fought with someone called Marwa.
I don't think our gathering is a coincidence.
- Really? - Want to be a part of the gang?
- Yes. - Oh, you know each other?
- What got you together? - None of us is on good terms with Marwa.
But Marwa talks about them all the time.
- What's your name? - Marwa.
We don't like you!
- Can I join you? - Sure.
- She has what it takes. - Certainly.
- Welcome. - Yes.
Of course. We'll know all about you soon.
I don't think there are people like us in the world.
And so they became best friends.
I wish I'd known you earlier.
- I'm a Pisces. - Virgo.
Sagittarius.
- Why are you laughing? - Not sure. I feel like I should.
You are right.
- I feel the lives of girls are trivial. - And silly.
They only talk about makeup and appearances.
- Unlike us who like scientific research. - And the academic one.
Did you know that turtles reproduce via the process of fission?
- No, I don't think so. - You don't have to always disagree.
- We were taught that. - Right, in Geology or Philosophy.
- Not in Physical Education? - That's right, fission has movement.
Even Math has division.
- Okay, okay, but what's the proof? - Here, check this.
- "Turtles reproduce via fission." - Archimedes.
You know, I'm starting to believe it
because I like this Archimedes, the guy in 300.
No, that one is called Mercedes.
Who's Leonidas then?
I think that's a Pokémon.
Americans' names are confusing.
Where did the sun rise from today? Note it down.
As you wish, it's your loss.
Thank you, my intellectual friends.
I have now found my passion in life.
I'll change my bio on Instagram.
TURTLE-SUPPORTER 4 LIFE
Give turtles their rights!
Their shell is too heavy to carry!
You have no emotions!
May God burden you with a big shell!
That's enough. I think we've convinced them.
- We have strong proof. - And we are strong.
Also, chimpanzees...
So did you do what you wanted to do? Your project, I mean.
Videos about drawing, huh? How is it going?
You know how. The online community is ruthless.
- You know why? - Why?
Because you're a joke!
Why don't you listen? Didn't I recommend Physical Education or Political Sciences?
- Come on, arms crossed. - Dad, I don't need that right now.
You need to change your way of life!
You need to become a man!
- How? - Watch the news with me.
We always aim to provide equal opportunity for all social classes on levels of... Wait...
democracy and psychology.
Facing problems? Your dad ruined your future?
Order Juice Time.
Talk to us about the importance of social equality.
Of course, there are many opportunities. And God is always with us.
And the people are hardworking and supportive, right?
- Dad. - Shut it, listen to this.
What are the biggest challenges to employment in the new century?
The resources must be supported by refuting the sustainability
of perspective perceptions using a traditional method and... something.
Michael, can you phrase it in a way that...
Let me oversimplify.
Here is the polar centralization, and here is global warming.
A newer vision can't affect my decision.
- Are you there? - Dad, this is not helpful.
What's helpful then? Drawing?
Oh, I want to be a drawer! Let me draw you! Be a man!
The army announced that they're accepting recruits. Join.
And on this day, the ministry decided to develop the military approach.
We need new strategies to strengthen our defenses and develop our military prowess!
Good idea, consider it done.
- Down, soldier! - Yes, sir!
- Up, soldier! - Yes, sir!
- Who told you to go up? - You, sir!
Don't say "You, sir!" Say, "At your order, sir!"
At your order, sir! Sir! Yes, sir!
- Quitting or not quitting? - Not!
- Quitting or not quitting? - I'm quitting, Captain. Peace be upon you.
Not a man!
- Hey, Taufeeq, what's the matter? - I just left the army training camp.
All broken, heartbeats aren't regular, and I'm not breathing well.
Panadol.
I feel exhausted. I can't move.
Panadol Extra gives you energy.
- I can't sleep. - Panadol Night makes you sleep and forget.
- I think you're wrong. - I could've said to have some Dettol
and chew some gum, but my job is to make sure you don't die.
Where did you get your degree?
A long story of hard work.
Hamad, I need a sentence.
It seems you're cheating. Didn't I explain it already?
Five plus two equals what?
- Seven! - Yes, good boy.
The rest is homework.
In high school, they would search for cell phones.
If you had one, you were more dangerous than Pablo Escobar.
I didn't have a phone, but my shoes were red.
Get out! I want to see your parents tomorrow.
Is this a class or a Barcelona match?
You should adhere to our values, traditions and principles.
But sir, my shoes don't impact my academic achievement.
- No! You are imitating Messi. - No, I'm just--
Let him imitate us! We shouldn't imitate him!
Let him wear his shoes and play. Isn't he the best player in the world? Go on!
Our school hated Barcelona.
They suspended me, and two days later, I returned after pulling some strings.
I attended school wearing sliders and got suspended again.
I still don't know why.
At college, the lecture was one hour long.
The doctor would talk about himself for an hour and ten minutes.
Good evening, our lesson today is about the most important microscopic components
that cannot be seen with the naked eye.
When I was your age, I studied at Uranus University.
King Arthur was ruling. They wanted my grandfather to rule, but he refused.
Angelina Jolie is jealous of my sister, and I have a lot of money.
Sorry, back to our lesson.
I was top of my class
and the second person in the world to buy an Xbox 360.
Bill Gates beat me to it, because it's that bastard's company.
So technically, I was the first to buy it.
This world does not deserve me.
So I graduated from college dumber than I was at high school.
All who became teachers from my generation
followed the same approach, and it is still like that today.
So we graduated and created a golden generation, as you can see.
- Nice. So what should I take now? - Panadol Night.
Why are you wearing red shoes?
AMBEEH INSTITUTE FOR FRAUD
Check out this jacket. It's beautiful and made from the best unique fox leather.
It just needs a marketing face and some ads.
If you want to advertise, we have a model.
She doesn't cost anything. Just marry her and set me free.
I'm sure she has fans
and she gets many likes. Many men would want her.
There're the Turtle-Supporters in the group. God bless them, they're a trend.
Each video of theirs gets at least three million views.
- I want them. - Hello, Turtle-Supporters?
We're ready. Where's the money?
The product is a leather jacket from a fox hunted in the jungle.
- A fox? - Poor thing!
- You skinned it? - How cruel humans are!
Sorry, the product goes against our anti-cruelty principles.
- How much? - How much do you want?
- 4,000. - I'll give you 8,000.
- You know that foxes are cunning? - They are.
- So cunning. - We support turtles anyway.
- What's a fox got to do with it? - Oh my God, foxes deserve it.
Deal
Hi, girls! Today I present to you a fabulous new product.
You can wear it with boots when you get a big loan. I mean, you can...
I need to make the Snap again. My subconscious got confused.
Hi, girls! Oh, shit.
Be natural, Jana. Be natural.
Hi, girls! This is a new jacket from original fox leather
kept in fridges. Highly recommended.
There are only three in the world.
They were slaughtered halal. Don't worry.
You slaughtered an animal for a jacket?
They are frauds who are tricking our children!
All that for money?
- Where's the humanity? - Animal rights!
THE SOLVE YOUR PROBLEM COURT
I swear I didn't know it was from an animal.
But you said "fox" in the video!
Yes, but there are two kinds of fox. There is the common fox
and the cunning metaphorical fox which we mention in poetry.
My subconscious got confused.
But I swear I didn't know it was an animal!
What did you think it was then?
Maybe a... a snake. I said "snake" in the video!
Snakes are also animals. It seems you just finished preschool.
- Really? - Yes.
But the snake is cold-blooded. It pounces on its prey.
You said "fox," not "snake"!
No, I said "spot baldness."
The scabs that show on the skin sometimes.
- You don't agree with science? - It was fox! Stop beating around the bush!
Sorry, okay!
Fraud!
Irresponsible.
Uncultured.
Execution.
They're taking advantage of her weakness because she's a girl.
Men are so malicious.
They ruled us for years. Now is the time to stand up.
Hey, you!
By the way, we can do the same stuff guys do.
We can even beat them.
- What? - Who said that?
- What's going on? - Are you lost, sister?
This is proof from the ninth-grade book
that women can be pregnant for nine months.
Can men do that?
And many women can withstand tattooing.
Can you withstand this?
Women can't carry out military missions like men!
Can you get pregnant for nine months?
As for leadership positions, men don't take maternity leave.
- Can you get pregnant for nine months? - Yes, I can!
You're a girl!
- You're the girl! - I'm not a girl! Don't curse at me!
- You're the girl - I'm a man!
- I'm the man. - You want to become a man?
No, I'll be a woman like a man.
Order. Order.
Dear ones, a question from the audience.
Where did the sun rise from today?
- Note it down. - Are you serious?
Suit yourself. It's your loss.
Ms. Dana.
We always notice that women are very interested in getting men's tasks.
But we don't see men who are interested in getting women's tasks.
Why is that? Thanks.
Because they linked pregnancy and giving birth to women,
and that's not necessary.
And she kept going on and on
and received encouragement from her friends.
- You had him. - You embarrassed him.
You're a woman and you beat him. What would've happened if you were a man?
Don't call me a woman!
Sorry, I was still in the zone.
Let me change my bio quickly.
SUPPORTER OF THE WORLD'S RIGHTS AND OF PLANET CAPTAIN AMERICA
She got excited and started defending the world's minorities
until none remained.
Her ambition didn't stop there. She began a movement to defend astronomical objects.
She claimed that these objects are lonely while they roam around in the universe.
Then she demanded from some ministry
that Niobium and Tellurium be given their rights in the periodical table
and put ahead of Hydrogen and Helium.
Because, poor things, they are very far and no one mentions them.
That campaign was called "They Are Already Elements. Don't Elementize Them."
What are you doing to yourself?
Look who's talking! "I'm quitting, Officer."
I told you this is taboo.
Don't interfere with me and I won't interfere with you.
Whether a supporter of turtles, or something else,
or bacteria, it's my life! I'm free!
I get you. I'm like you.
I'm trying to find something for me, but people always bring down my morale.
License and registration.
- What's the matter? - There must be something illegal,
I just can't find it. Help me out a bit.
- There's nothing, I swear. - I can't not find anything!
License and registration.
- Why do you have license and registration? - Officer?
I'm a deputy corporal, not an officer. You are not seeing clearly.
Driving under the influence.
But I'm a good guy!
A good guy under the influence!
In Dr. Anwar Sayyadi's lecture, he says, "Only a fruitful tree is stoned."
I'm being attacked, Taufeeq.
Attacked because I'm successful.
You're being attacked because you're infuriating.
You specialize in infuriating people with your ideas
that you got from 90 references and put together!
You end up with a broccoli-bat salad!
I think you're stoning me because I'm a fruitful tree.
- What do you say we hang up? - Okay.
All of us fail at some point in our life,
but that doesn't mean you should stop failing.
Doctor, are you trying to help me?
- Of course! - What should I do?
Just continue what you're doing. You're a failure.
- Cool. - Come back.
You failure! You joke!
Honestly though, sorry. Come back. You made me feel sorry for you.
- She left you? - Yes.
- Your dad is pressuring you? - Yes.
- Bad friends? Kicked out of college? - Yes.
- Failed in your project? - Yes.
- Went to the army and left? - Yes.
You joke!
No, that's enough. Look forward. Get busy.
- Get a job. - I don't have a degree. It's too late.
What degree? Use your high school diploma.
Wait a second.
Hey, Mirtui?
Tomorrow, my son will go to you. Find him a place.
Bye, bye. Okay. Bye, bye.
Done.
Taufeeq?
Mirtui?
Welcome.
Tell Mr. Hamid that I smoke.
Let him suspend me. I don't want to go to school.
You're so badass.
Teach me.
It's innate.
- Where are you going? - I want to get a bun.
- No. - Why not?
- I want to hit you first. - Why?
Because you're talking back.
What's your mother's name?
- What's your mother's name? - Martha! Martha!
Okay, let's go, guys.
Let's welcome our brother and colleague Taufeeq. It's his first day.
Welcome, Taufeeq!
I want you to get comfortable and consider yourself among your family and friends.
- Okay. - Alright, get me a glass of water.
- But Mister... - It's there. It's not far.
- It's not the distance. - What then? Velocity and time?
Laugh.
Good. Or do you want a demotion?
In the job description, it doesn't say to get the manager water.
But it says to do as the manager says!
Scratch my back, I can't reach it.
Look, Taufeeq. You think we were never in your place?
We didn't like it and wanted our bosses' jobs.
But when we replace them, we do the same stuff.
- Rashid! - Sir!
Nothing, sit down! Rash...
- Sir! - I didn't finish your name. You're fired.
One gets to be a manager for only a short period of time.
If you don't make the most of it, you'll have wasted it.
To your desk.
Blow up the place! Blow up the place!
He must teach them a lesson today.
Hit her! She's not dressed decently.
Rob the place.
You seem like a decent guy.
- Thanks. - Don't let Mirtui affect you.
Everyone likes you and wants you to stay.
- Thanks. - We feel you are close to us.
- Got it. What's with you? - The manager is sick, isn't he?
- He acts weirdly. - Manager! He says you're sick and weird!
You're both fired.
Me? Why?
You forgot to say sir.
Maasouma, you're promoted.
Nice dress.
- Get me some water. - We were just friends.
- With two pieces of ice. - Understood.
Say ma'am, please.
They think it's so easy to become a boss.
I wronged him, I didn't wrong him.
I don't think I wronged him.
When was the last time I was wrong?
A true-or-false in fourth grade?
The test was wrong.
I wonder if he's thinking about me now.
Where did the sun rise from today?
I need to talk to somebody.
Jana!
I'm at a job interview. I'll talk to you later.
- Sorry, I'd like to work for you. - Your qualifications?
The place is great, it's so classy.
- Yes. - What about your qualifications?
I feel I'm unique, ambitious and hard to break.
I went through so much.
- One of my friends tried to... - Qualifications.
I sent my ex a message, oh my God, so long!
I was so sad. You think we'll get back together? No!
- Sister. - Yes, my qualifications.
Can I talk about my ambitions?
I want to start my own business and get a wing tattoo.
- Jana, your college degree. - I didn't finish college. You know why?
The Communications Institute is accepting now.
BTW, it's better than a college degree.
You can inquire about it. After all, you're as old as you are mature.
- I don't think you're qualified. - You mean Sausan is better than me?
- Who's Sausan? - You know where she goes at the weekend?
- Jana, let's stay on topic. - Let me show you her Snapchat.
Sister, it seems you're a unique person who's a thinker.
We need people who can stick to the work schedule.
- Of course. - Where do you live?
He must be checking if I'm cheap.
Sorry, I'm engaged.
To make this interview short, six times two equals?
I had memorized the subtraction table!
REJECTED UNFIT FOR HUMAN INTERACTION
How was your interview?
I amazed them so much they got scared of me.
- So you got the job? - No, Mom, they worry about their jobs.
They see me as a threat. When I become a CEO, I'll fire them.
- You were rejected? - You mean Sundos is better than me?
I don't want to tell you about the time when she went to the police station.
And they wrote in the minutes of the appeal court "three nights."
She could pay a fine of 1,200 or be imprisoned for three months.
Or get either punishment.
I don't want to talk about it.
Dana called me! Hey, dear.
I'm broken. I'm upset.
I'm not acting right.
Calm down, I'm coming.
Jana, I feel I'm never lucky and I always fail.
I work so hard only for another person to reap the profit.
Remember the earphones for cheating on the tests?
I taught the girls how to use them.
They all passed, while I failed.
It's as if someone has cursed me.
Maybe someone has cast a spell on you.
- So your friend passed? - Yes, but she cheated, God forgive us.
God forgive us and keep these things away from us.
I know a woman who breaks spells. She brings luck and keeps envy away.
- She brings lovers. - A husband!
She can understand you with a look.
She knew things about me before I said anything.
It seems you get thirsty every now and then.
But once you drink water, you feel hydrated.
- 200. - Tell me more about my father.
It seems he's busy with something at some point in his life.
True!
- God bless her! Want to visit her? - Let's go.
You're the one who cries when sad?
Yes. Wow, your memory is amazing!
It's not my memory, Kilimanjaro helped me.
I bought him from Akihabara. He sends ethereal non-introverted signals.
Got it. Um Aarif, my friend is under psychological pressure.
The series of Mustafa Kemal Atatürk pushes the partner away.
- Taken from dragon bones. 411. - Wait.
- Yes? - I'm not fortunate in my life and can't...
Do pushups on embers and say, "Shoryuken!"
I'm not fortunate. My social relationships are becoming worse, and the more I try...
- You're Aquarius? Cancer? - No. No.
- Capricorn? Libra? - No. No.
- Virgo? Gemini? Leo? Aries? - No. No. No. No.
- Sagittarius? I knew it. - Yes.
Avoid Pisces. Pisces is an animal.
- I know Pisces is an animal. - I don't mean the zodiac sign.
True! A Pisces takes money from you, and if he leaves, he doesn't return it.
But even though he's hurt me, I still love him.
- That's your ex, not the zodiac sign. - Yes, my ex was Pisces. How did you know?
- I don't think it makes a difference. - Born at the start or end of the month?
- End of the month. - Fire or flying?
- We're not Pokémon. - No, Dana. A person has five signs.
- That doesn't mean what you said was true. - This is a documented science!
- Documented where? - It just is! Don't anger me!
Kilimanjaro got angry! Give me 370 and leave!
- Oh, God! God help us! - Let's go! God help us!
Come back! You'll see me in your dreams or in a parallel universe!
Con failed.
They conned you? You've got to get Time Juice.
Calm down, your life isn't all about him. You think he understands what you feel?
These guys are like seawater.
It's blue and beautiful from afar, but if you drink it, it's salty and mossy.
Accept it and move on. Enjoy your time and you'll forget.
When I got divorced, nothing made me forget but having fun.
How should I have fun?
Like this.
Okay, let's have fun.
It's been a month since Dana and I broke up.
- It still feels like yesterday. - You know how many girls there are?
3,600,000,000.
She's not the only one. Have some fun and you'll forget.
- How should I have fun? - Let me take you somewhere.
Hey! Where do you think you're going?
- What are the names of your mothers? - Say, "Martha."
- Martha. - Okay, go in.
Dana? What are you doing?
Me? I'm just working out my shoulder muscles. Look.
You said that after you leave, you won't do wrong things.
This is not something wrong. Yusef is my yoga instructor,
Murtada is an old college classmate,
and this is Bobyan.
So yeah, I don't know.
The sun is with us today.
That one I don't know.
What are you doing here?
I thought it was a clinic for a colon-bone-neuro-respiratory x-ray,
so I went in.
You know that I don't go to such places, right?
Right. This isn't even you.
So they kept making excuses for each other until 4:00 a.m.
until they got back together,
even though they both knew that they were lying.
I was chasing Bulbasaur in Pokémon Go and I entered there by mistake.
Really? Me too!
I feel complete with you.
Yes, you just need to marry me.
At this point, Taufeeq's life started going in another direction.
- Get married already! - You're a big man!
- When do you want to settle down? - Get married and have kids.
- I want to see your kids. - I want to see my grandkids.
Listen to your aunt, Taufeeq.
Marriage completes a person.
And children are its fruit.
But, oh God, I don't know how our money gets spent.
It's weird because we don't spend a lot.
- Two maids and a chauffeur. - Car and house rent.
- Loan from the bank. - A debt from my friend.
- The Girls' Association. - Who conned you.
Remember your friend who robbed you and went to Canada?
- Didn't we agree not to judge? - True.
- Bashaer's wedding dress. - Services and cable.
- Incense and perfume. - Weed... I mean, nothing.
- Did we eat out this month? - Not sure, but I cooked a few times.
- Good job. - The trip to London.
Just buy the same brands that are there, but then tell friends they're from London.
- Didn't we agree not to judge? - True.
- A lot of expenses. - The bracelet of Archimedes.
Just don't think you'll have to spend all your time with your kids.
Look at me, I can live and do things. Thank God, my time is mine.
He doesn't fall asleep fast.
Where is Ibrahimović playing now?
You don't have to talk if you have nothing to talk about.
I'll wait in the room until Aunt is done.
Sure. Make yourself at home.
- When was the last time you cooked? - Oh, really?
- It seems you forgot your Croatia thing. - Don't confuse things!
When you run this house like a man, you can talk to me about cooking.
We were rehearsing an act where we fight, but we're dancing now.
And I was testing my voice.
Do you listen to heavy metal?
Really though, where is Ibrahimović now?
I'm going home.
- Where did he go? - I think he was convinced of marrying.
Marriage is a wonderful thing.
With God's blessing, the pressure of experienced people,
psychological and physical abuse from the parents,
Taufeeq was married to Dana, forcibly.
They lived happily for three days. Then they stopped talking.
His outgoings started getting bigger and bigger.
- This purse is great. - Yes, great.
- The same one that Isaam's wife has. - Yes, Isaam's wife.
- Isaam bought it for her. - Yes.
Tomorrow is Valentine's Day.
I'm just saying, don't think that I...
No, I know. I know.
You want corn? With butter?
Taufeeq declared bankruptcy in the fourth month.
He borrowed money from his mom and aunt and conned his friends.
Guys, a sure-thing project.
An application for barbers to come to one's house and cut hair without talking.
Okay, brother. What about a laundry?
Laundries are old ideas, we need a new idea.
We can put iPhone chargers in the corner.
Right, customers get bored.
Yes, yes. Customers, laundry, right.
Give me your money now, and with the blessings of God and our parents,
I'll double them for you so you can buy whatever you want.
Business is about winning as well as losing, okay?
Dana raided him three times after midnight.
He played dumb and started dancing.
She didn't buy it, so he started talking nonsense.
This is for cleaning equipment... Bowling... Remember? Sonic?
Here, look.
After the beep, it'll be one-five and...
His voice comforts me.
To please her, he took her abroad using his friends' money.
They experienced the hot-air balloon, and Dana saw a rainbow for the first time.
Wow! A rainbow.
My dream since I was a child is to slide down a rainbow.
Want to try?
- So you want to kill me? - No, it's just to realize your dream.
And mine too.
They had a beautiful and special baby that was so different, unique, and smart
that Dana had to type, "Mother of an amazing angel."
Not like any other woman.
He's so energetic.
Imagine that at the age of two, he learned to say, "Mama"!
No other baby says, "Mama."
He should enter Got Talent.
Then the routine visits started so they check in on each other, not to brag.
Thank God, my jewelry was worth 70,000.
My husband's underwear is Dolce & Gabbana.
- No, that was embroidered fabric. - Yes, I forgot.
What's that?
Casio?
Yes... It's none of your business! We have money!
Also, the baby became a medium
for parents' physiological and psychological analysis
so that they don't feel lonely and get involved with his genetics.
This kid inherited moodiness from me.
Oh come on! His smile and large intestines are a copy of mine.
What about the baby hair on the pancreas side. Is it not mine?
- Oh my God! - True!
Accurate.
- This baby is smart. - How come?
He's like me when I was a kid.
We put ketchup on top of the mustard and use the barbie to stir it.
Right, you were special.
By the way, you have some extensions I don't like.
- Which ones? - This one. It'd be better white.
And when the kid grew a little and was no longer a cute baby,
his popularity sunk and no one cared about him, except his great grandmother.
She took care of him since the beginning.
She raised him well and he received knowledge and experience from her.
Because she saw something special in him.
I see in you potential that I don't see in any of my other grandchildren.
Let me teach you about life.
- This one is bad. - Why?
He lives west of al-Adsaniyya.
This one is also bad. Call him bad things whenever you see him.
He'll get angry and respond with something similar.
You'll then say, "At least my grandpa's uncle didn't run away at Bosmawiyyeh."
- What's Bosmawiyyeh? - An old incident. Not important.
Just say it to anger him.
Bad man.
This one is also bad. His color is ugly.
Bad. His parents used to grow radish.
They are ill-mannered too.
God forgive me, I don't need more sins.
I think you're definitely going to Heaven, God willing.
- Really? - Yes, you threw vegetables in the inbox.
God damn that maid.
Maid?
- These are the worst. - They look normal.
No, when they get engaged, they swim with fish in the bathtub.
Bad. Bad. No reason.
They dress and act differently.
They mix ketchup and Pepsi. They put clove in the DVD.
They play PlayStation using a Game Boy Color controller.
- You're lucky to be born here. - Wow! I'm special!
And if someone calls you racist, don't mind it. Don't get in trouble!
Bastards.
After years of marriage...
- See those two stars? - What about them?
Their light and the small distance between them, it's as if they belong together.
- Just like you and me. - I want to be with you always.
Dragon of the sea!
Where are my clothes?
Hey! When are you going to change your ways?
I cook and clean for you, and you get bossy!
No job, bad language.
- Learn from them, listen to them. - It's acting! It's called acting!
No, it's not. That's her husband.
Check their Instagram. They live a great life.
Not true, not true. Anything on camera is not true.
This is a picture I put on Instagram. And that's me really.
Mom, is something wrong?
No, honey, we're just practicing for a circus.
As you can see, these things take time.
- It causes an annoying ruckus. - Go back to sleep.
Let's go to the park.
- See the stars above us? - Where?
There must be some. There.
- What about them? - I don't know.
- Dana, reality isn't like movies. - It can be!
No one is watching us, and there's no soundtrack.
There are these. In movies, the director doesn't film these.
Let me show you.
Inside my heart, you are high and mighty, and everything you want you can get.
And you're the love that called me, and I answered the call.
You suck.
I'd be better off leaving you. Peace be upon you.
Dana!
Dana left me.
You deserve it!
Pass it high.
- Pass it high, honey! From the corner! - Mom.
- Wait until I bring Ramos. - Mom.
- I need some quiet. - Turn the PlayStation off. I want to talk.
Wait, I want to see the trades this season.
- Mom, I want to get divorced! - Don't let the devil mess up your lives!
The devil has nothing to do with it. The man is no good.
Unemployed, doesn't provide, doesn't go out.
Unfortunate, doesn't compliment, only listens to his friends!
And the last time, he called me "Dragon of the sea"!
- He said that? - Yes.
My sweet daughter! Let me see your face.
- He's right! - Mom!
I told you not to marry him from the beginning.
You told me not to marry him because you didn't like his mother.
I think there's something wrong with him. There's a difference.
No, there isn't. The result is the same. We don't want him.
- So I should get divorced? - No, that's no good. You have a kid.
- What to do? - Dear, marriage is a sacrifice.
Endure it. Don't ruin your household.
- Until when should I endure? - Come on! You've been married two days!
See, without sacrifice, marriage doesn't survive.
Your father, rest in peace, forbade me from playing soccer or going out.
Did I say anything? No. For your sake.
I waited until he died and now I'm playing FIFA.
Take the controller.
Put Carlos as a striker and run with him to the sideline.
No, Mom. That was the old one.
True, this one is 2016. Shoot it with Cristiano from afar.
There's a glitch in the game.
- Did you send your kid to a school? - I don't know where to send him.
Send him to the state elementary school "Tricko Tobacco."
- He'll become like us. - State? Like us?
Remember what Miss Raghad used to do to me?
She didn't do anything! It was you who...
It was offside! Who gave this guy an international badge?
- You were being spoiled. - Mom, the whole school is a dictatorship.
And Miss Raghad was its Hitler.
- Nadia Karim. - Yes.
- Hana Saeed. - Yes.
Dana Abdul Adheem.
- Sleeping Dana Abdul Adheem! - Yes.
From now on, your name is Sleeping Dana Abdul Adheem.
- But, Miss, I... - But, Miss... But, Miss...
Want me to bring you a bed?
This is a Geography class!
If you don't pay attention, I'll erase you from the geography!
Open your book on Page 62.
Sleeping Dana Abdul Adheem, read.
You're still looking for the page, honey?
- Yes. - Yes! Go on, read.
The Canary Islands are made of four main major islands.
The islands... The islands are located...
This hammer will be located on your head! Read well!
And when many parents complained about Miss Raghad,
they invited her on Problem Solver to respond.
Miss Raghad, let's get right to it.
Is it true that you use violent methods to educate?
- It's none of your business. - We want to clarify things to our viewers.
Anyone who doesn't respect my class won't be treated nicely!
- Sure, but you... - Don't interrupt me!
- Only I interrupt! - Understood.
You should know that those students are failures, first off.
- But... - What did I say about interrupting me?
But you can't describe people that way.
- The criticism should be academic. - I describe what I see.
- And what do you see? - I see your head now.
Dear viewers, we'll take a break.
Go on, don't ignore me.
- What do you do? - I'm a teacher, and you'd better know it!
It seems that this country needs teachers that teach teachers.
Your head looks like a compass!
And after the incident of Raghad Tamouri on TV,
the Minister of Homework declared war on the media
and held a conference to defend her.
We don't accept what happened to Teacher Raghad Tamouri
or the trap that the nasty media set for her!
She's a precious teacher.
CONSPIRACY REFUTATION CONFERENCE
She's... I forgot the rest, wait.
We condemn what happened to Miss Raad Hammoudi
and the trap that was set by the nasty flags for the high teacher.
Prec... ious.
You can use colloquial language.
No, my language is great.
The person who taught me Arabic attests to that.
HAVE MERCY ON THE LANGUAGE
He wrote in his will, "Show them the language."
Right, I'm sure he's proud of you like all of us.
- But who wrote this for you? - What do you think of it?
Please don't ruin the language.
Raghad Tamouri, the students attest about her.
Let's watch this report.
The teacher Raghad explains the lessons, and she's kind.
Cut.
The teacher Raghad taught our daughter intellectual sophistication
and the principles of human interaction.
- Cut. - You can leave.
When I smoked, Teacher Raghad used to smoke with me.
She liked to joke. Didn't I tell you to delete this scene?
Is it true that she smoked with the students?
Kinda, yeah.
I feel comfortable now.
This is a school scandal.
They wronged her, and she left school
and set up in the business of cooking stuffed grape leaves.
She's just delivered this to me. And get your child into school.
Listen, my friend, the first rule of travel
is avoiding your countrymen and neighbors from your country.
It's enough that you see them back home. You want to see them here?
That's why we came to an area that our countrymen don't know.
They'll make us disown our country because of them.
It's good that we didn't go to Hoven Hill.
Otherwise, you'd find them on the table next to you.
Hello, guys.
Are you from our country?
He's from our country.
It's good that we met a fellow countryman.
Good evening, my friends.
From our country.
Where have you been?
I was dancing in that place there beside...
Anyway, it's none of your business.
You remind me of my younger days.
I do anything to avoid my responsibilities.
Have you anything else to do now?
- No. - There's a nice cat-shaped ride.
- Go and play. - What's wrong with you?
Or do you have no time 'cause your death is approaching?
Are you happy in life?
- Thank God. - We always thank God.
The problem is everyone taught me against my will to respect the elderly.
Don't worry about it. Why are you lonely?
My dad is angry. My mom thinks I'm useless.
I refused the major they chose, so they beat me.
I took my friends' advice on studying abroad and failed.
I started a project but got bullied and failed.
I joined the army but was ridiculed.
I got a job. The boss bullied and fired me.
I met a girl. She wasn't good, so I left her.
I tried to avoid her but failed.
My family forced me to marry her, and now we'll separate.
The people around us are specialists in mischief.
And now you appeared.
Do you have anything more to ruin my life?
- Harm or anything? - No, today is the weekend.
Otherwise, I'd hurt you.
How can I stay happy?
You want happiness?
After everything you go through in your day, do you think life is easy?
Troubles are chasing you everywhere.
They come to the ones you love and the ones you hate.
If there are no troubles, be sure that something is wrong.
- You mean... - Don't interrupt me. I forget quickly.
- I apologize, go on. - I forgot.
Wait, if there are no troubles in my life...
There must be something wrong.
Why does someone want your business to fail?
And some girl deserts you? And someone makes fun of you?
Some people oppose you or argue with you.
Some talk about you, and some plot against you.
Some complain, some cry.
Some do this, and some do that.
- Why? - I forgot.
Some moan and some cry.
Because some are fired, and some are hired.
She’s sad, he's miserable, and those two got themselves into trouble.
He was left in kindergarten. He wasn't invited.
She's fat. He has instalments to pay.
That one loves her cousin and so on. Everyone is troubled and hurt.
This, of course, doesn't justify the corruption of their morals.
But when you get close to them, they affect you.
Some people are sad because of wars and bombs.
Others are sad because of a missed call.
You always have the choice to be strong and smile
or to give up and submit and become like them.
Be strong like me.
Nothing beats me.
- I have spot baldness. - You encouraged me!
Your father wasn't wrong, but you did what he said at the wrong time.
Your friends weren't wrong either.
But you took their advice at the wrong time.
And mistakes build up.
At some point, you regret that you didn't take some advice,
and you don't go ahead with the next stage.
It's as if you're answering true/false exam questions,
and your answers are correct. But you're writing in the wrong place.
Learn confrontation, avoid compliments, and fix your life.
It's twelve o'clock. The weekend is over.
Let me plot against that one over there.
They oppose you, they argue with you.
They plot against you.
Plotting?
I told you something was wrong.
TAUFEEQ 7
If there's no trouble, be sure there's something wrong with your life.
Everyone is troubled and hurt.
But when you get close, they affect you.
Your father wasn't wrong. Nor were your friends.
But you listened at the wrong time.
You can always choose to be strong and smile.
Or to submit and become like them.
Fix your life.
Dad, thank you for your advice, yours and Mom's.
I'll go back to the first stage and specialize in art education.
He became a man, do you hear him?
You've amazed me. May God be with you.
My son depends on himself?
- I've waited so long for this moment. - Art is the foundation of civilization.
Drawing is poetry without words.
Oh, really.
Dear friends, thanks for the happy times and gentle guidance
which was mostly through sharing.
Sitting with you is fun and enjoyable, but it's time to say goodbye.
No, don't say that.
- You'll leave? - Yes.
Please stay here. They'll be lost without you.
- Will we find jobs without him or not? - I expect it to be difficult.
Okay, go.
OFFICE OF THE CHIEF OF STAFF OF TANKS AND WARS
We beat them.
That was better to help them become men.
Do you remember Taufeeq in batch 23?
Yeah, resignation, resignation.
Warning! Warning!
Zero hour has come. Hold your positions.
Hello, Dr. Mitwazy is speaking.
Doctor, I'm Taufeeq, a student of the fourteenth batch of sports sciences.
What do you want?
- You failed me in geometric designs. - So?
I wanted to tell you that I have skills.
Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you.
If you don't apologize, I'll look for you. I'll find you, and I'll kill you.
Shut up.
- Aren't you afraid? - What will you do?
I'll destroy your business and everything.
Not even the toughest guy in your family could do it.
You're offending my sister! Well, what's your number?
It's 628862.
Mine is 4682632.
- Do call me. - Call me, I don't have credit.
Oh my! You call!
Tea with ginger, Doctor.
I made him pour tea for me while standing on his hand.
You've become more brutal than when you were at high school.
Teach me to be like you.
You haven't seen anything yet. Have you tried my new move?
- What move? - Hadouken!
Get up, I didn't do it well. I'll do it again.
Get up or I'll kick out your Aunt Maasouma.
Taufeeq?
Why...?
The last stage,
I must say what I feel and not compliment at the expense of my comfort.
Dana, I think we should separate.
Divorce papers are in the second drawer.
This doesn't mean I don't wish you well. It might even be better for you.
Captain, we're in the finals. Don't upset us.
Good luck.
Goodbye, Taufeeq.
I finally found my passion in life.
CUTE SPEARHEAD
Taufeeq continued his new lifestyle
by confronting others and avoiding compliments
after he realized the sarcasm of humans and their enjoyment in bullying others
and their inconsiderate nature when they answer others without any real interest.
Dana lived happily ever after in her new life.
She won three Sony Championships.
And she's changed her social media bio eleven times during the year.
I'm a princess for an unknown person. Senders of DMs will be blocked.
I guess no one has ever thought of that phrase before.
And the lives of young people, friends, parents and employees continued.
And all the people we encounter on random software in the Matrix world.
- Have you had a child? - Congratulations.
- We're so glad to have you. - So much.
New employee?
You novice, massage my toes and you'll get promoted faster.
- References? - Go up to the fourth floor.
Do some pull-ups and come back. Don't wipe the sweat.
- Do you want to have children? - I don't know, bro. Time goes by so fast.
Don't you want to have children?
Children are the adornment of life. Have mercy on me.
- Are you going to be an astronaut? - No, I'm going to be an engineer.
- Are you crazy? - You idiot, you can go to Jupiter.
And there is still someone who wasn't expected.
No, we never neglect taking care of him as parents.
On the contrary, we see him for an hour or two a day.
Don't underestimate how busy we are.
Your child does poorly in grammar, and he's bad at mathematics.
He can't distinguish between Mohammed Abdu and Denzel Washington.
In fact, his mother accidentally conceived him.
I mean, there was no prior planning.
Speak for yourself. I bought him a PlayStation as soon as it was released.
Yes, with a GTA game. He learned to blow up cars at the age of three.
The reason is your mother who used to read stories from The Origin of Nations book.
Najeeb Taufeeq.
Najeeb Tau...
Read the second paragraph, you idiot!