1 00:00:04,921 --> 00:00:07,048 [upbeat saxophone music] 2 00:00:07,090 --> 00:00:08,550 - How's Churro looking, Dr. Pocha? 3 00:00:08,591 --> 00:00:10,343 Does she have a hearing problem, 4 00:00:10,385 --> 00:00:13,304 or is she a mean girl playing mind games? 5 00:00:15,306 --> 00:00:16,516 - Let's test it out 6 00:00:16,558 --> 00:00:19,352 with a basic canine auditory assessment. 7 00:00:19,394 --> 00:00:22,355 Hey, Churro, can you hear me? 8 00:00:23,565 --> 00:00:24,482 Kidding. 9 00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:26,443 I did a cochlear exam earlier, 10 00:00:26,484 --> 00:00:30,655 and Churro has hearing loss because she's an old woman. 11 00:00:31,573 --> 00:00:35,326 - Nana says it's not polite to discuss a lady's age, 12 00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:37,662 unless she's a sucia. 13 00:00:39,956 --> 00:00:41,750 Then all bets are off. 14 00:00:42,959 --> 00:00:44,544 - I knew she wasn't a puppy, 15 00:00:44,586 --> 00:00:46,546 but seven seems too young for hearing loss. 16 00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:49,591 - It is, but 15 is right on track. 17 00:00:49,632 --> 00:00:51,718 - She's 15? 18 00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:54,763 That's the most important year in a young Latina dog's life. 19 00:00:54,804 --> 00:00:57,515 We should throw her a quinceañera. 20 00:00:57,557 --> 00:01:00,310 - Yes, like my friend Seymour Bloom 21 00:01:00,352 --> 00:01:02,729 threw his schnauzer a bark-mitzvah. 22 00:01:04,564 --> 00:01:07,901 The gefilte fish was to die for. 23 00:01:07,942 --> 00:01:09,736 - It will be so fun. 24 00:01:09,778 --> 00:01:12,989 We can rent a venue, choreograph dances, 25 00:01:13,031 --> 00:01:17,869 and put Churro in a poofy dress with four tiny high heels. 26 00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:22,290 - That all sounds so crazy. 27 00:01:22,332 --> 00:01:24,668 - Not if we put it on TikTok. 28 00:01:24,709 --> 00:01:26,711 It will be good publicity for the vet's office. 29 00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:29,339 - I love crazy. 30 00:01:29,381 --> 00:01:31,424 - We could even partner with East LA Shelter 31 00:01:31,466 --> 00:01:33,510 and feature dogs that need to be adopted. 32 00:01:33,551 --> 00:01:35,720 - It will be a night Churro will never forget. 33 00:01:35,762 --> 00:01:37,972 Hear that, Churro? 34 00:01:38,014 --> 00:01:40,308 Oh, right, you can't. 35 00:01:41,059 --> 00:01:42,435 Oy vey. 36 00:01:44,062 --> 00:01:46,981 [upbeat saxophone music] 37 00:01:47,023 --> 00:01:54,155 * * 38 00:02:02,747 --> 00:02:06,126 - Ooh, nice cake. 39 00:02:06,167 --> 00:02:07,919 - Don't--don't eat that. 40 00:02:07,961 --> 00:02:10,005 This is for the dogs at Churro's quinces. 41 00:02:10,046 --> 00:02:13,883 - If loving pig snout is wrong, I don't want to be right. 42 00:02:15,635 --> 00:02:16,845 I'm excited about the party. 43 00:02:16,886 --> 00:02:18,972 I just got the invitation. It's my first one. 44 00:02:19,014 --> 00:02:20,140 - Oh, it's your first quinces? 45 00:02:20,181 --> 00:02:22,308 - No, my first invitation. 46 00:02:22,350 --> 00:02:24,352 - You bringing anyone? You get a plus-one. 47 00:02:24,394 --> 00:02:26,354 - Oh, cool. I'll bring George. 48 00:02:28,023 --> 00:02:29,482 - He's already going. 49 00:02:29,524 --> 00:02:31,901 - You asked him first. 50 00:02:31,943 --> 00:02:34,320 - No, I'm going with Mayan. 51 00:02:34,362 --> 00:02:36,906 - So he turned you down, huh? [laughs] 52 00:02:36,948 --> 00:02:40,493 - Oscar, normal people do not want to spend 53 00:02:40,535 --> 00:02:42,454 every waking moment with George. 54 00:02:43,538 --> 00:02:45,832 Don't you want to branch out, you know, 55 00:02:45,874 --> 00:02:47,709 like, find a date? 56 00:02:47,751 --> 00:02:48,877 - But who? 57 00:02:48,918 --> 00:02:52,297 I haven't had a girlfriend since... 58 00:02:52,339 --> 00:02:55,216 the day I met George. 59 00:02:57,010 --> 00:02:58,720 - Why don't you let me help you find someone? 60 00:02:58,762 --> 00:03:01,765 My friends say I'm a white "hitch." 61 00:03:03,350 --> 00:03:04,976 - You might be hearing that wrong. 62 00:03:05,935 --> 00:03:09,189 [upbeat saxophone music] 63 00:03:09,230 --> 00:03:11,733 - You're throwing the dog a quinceañera? 64 00:03:14,235 --> 00:03:15,737 You already cook for it, 65 00:03:15,779 --> 00:03:17,614 kiss it, let it sleep in your bed. 66 00:03:17,655 --> 00:03:20,283 What's next, you gonna send it to a liberal arts college? 67 00:03:22,243 --> 00:03:23,870 - A quince is a big step up, Mayan, 68 00:03:23,912 --> 00:03:27,040 for a dog that was found in a porta-potty. 69 00:03:27,707 --> 00:03:29,834 - The whole point is to promote the clinic, 70 00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:31,795 find homes for strays, and end the night 71 00:03:31,836 --> 00:03:33,880 before the guests start humping each other. 72 00:03:34,506 --> 00:03:36,966 - Don't tell me how to party, Mayan. 73 00:03:37,759 --> 00:03:40,220 - I can't believe you're this excited about a quinces. 74 00:03:40,261 --> 00:03:42,222 When you were 15, you refused to have one. 75 00:03:42,263 --> 00:03:44,391 - Yeah, you said, "Ew, it's, like, 76 00:03:44,432 --> 00:03:47,977 a total patriarchal event, so off fleek." 77 00:03:49,604 --> 00:03:51,648 - It's for a good cause. 78 00:03:51,690 --> 00:03:53,483 And if we're gonna find these shelter dogs homes, 79 00:03:53,525 --> 00:03:56,569 this quinces needs to be big and flashy, 80 00:03:56,611 --> 00:03:59,072 so I need all of us to pitch in as a family. 81 00:03:59,114 --> 00:04:00,699 - Fine. I'll help. 82 00:04:00,740 --> 00:04:02,659 It will probably be the closest I get to planning a wedding. 83 00:04:03,993 --> 00:04:06,204 - Great, so you two are gonna work together 84 00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:08,289 on music and decorations. 85 00:04:08,331 --> 00:04:11,001 I want a female mariachi band 86 00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:14,629 who know Rihanna's entire catalog off book. 87 00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:16,423 - They have female mariachis? 88 00:04:16,464 --> 00:04:17,757 What do their grito sound like? 89 00:04:17,799 --> 00:04:20,802 "Ayyy, put that toilet seat down" 90 00:04:22,512 --> 00:04:24,597 - We wouldn't have to say it if you would do it. 91 00:04:24,639 --> 00:04:26,266 - Well, I we wouldn't have to do it 92 00:04:26,307 --> 00:04:27,767 if you would just stand up. 93 00:04:28,601 --> 00:04:30,395 - Hey, there's no time for your bickering. 94 00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:31,896 We have a lot to do. 95 00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:33,356 - Oh, Mayan, 96 00:04:33,398 --> 00:04:36,443 these decorations seem a little over-the-top for dogs. 97 00:04:36,484 --> 00:04:38,820 Maybe if we could be simple, we can have-- 98 00:04:38,862 --> 00:04:40,447 - A daughter who knows exactly what 99 00:04:40,488 --> 00:04:41,573 she wants this quinces to be, 100 00:04:41,614 --> 00:04:43,825 and no one should dare to question her? 101 00:04:46,036 --> 00:04:47,662 - Sure. 102 00:04:51,666 --> 00:04:53,626 She's being so extra. 103 00:04:55,837 --> 00:04:57,589 - This is textbook "está loca." 104 00:04:57,630 --> 00:04:59,966 [upbeat saxophone music] 105 00:05:04,596 --> 00:05:06,139 - Churro's grandparents are working together 106 00:05:06,181 --> 00:05:08,433 to make sure her quinces is a magical night 107 00:05:08,475 --> 00:05:10,018 for all our adoptable dogs. 108 00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:13,646 - I'm gonna put your father up for adoption. 109 00:05:13,688 --> 00:05:16,232 - [high pitched] Adopt me. I'm mostly housebroken. 110 00:05:16,858 --> 00:05:19,778 - And if you want more of this, come to the quinceañera. 111 00:05:20,695 --> 00:05:23,406 Or any day of my childhood. 112 00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:24,824 What's the problem? 113 00:05:24,866 --> 00:05:26,159 You were supposed to finish that arch an hour ago. 114 00:05:26,201 --> 00:05:27,327 - He's not helping. 115 00:05:27,369 --> 00:05:28,745 He's sucking the air out of the balloons. 116 00:05:28,787 --> 00:05:30,163 You want to deflate something? 117 00:05:30,205 --> 00:05:32,582 Why don't you start with your giant head? 118 00:05:32,624 --> 00:05:34,125 - [high pitched] Cálmate, bruja. 119 00:05:35,418 --> 00:05:38,254 - Oh, that voice stopped being funny 20 balloons ago. 120 00:05:38,296 --> 00:05:40,882 - And that voice stopped being pleasant 20 years ago. 121 00:05:40,924 --> 00:05:42,008 - It's fine. 122 00:05:42,050 --> 00:05:43,551 Quinten and I will handle the balloons. 123 00:05:43,593 --> 00:05:45,387 Did you guys meet with the mariachi band? 124 00:05:45,428 --> 00:05:48,306 - Yes, The Mariachi-chis. 125 00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:50,058 They're beautiful, talented, 126 00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:53,019 and they even have a chihuahua that plays a tiny guitar. 127 00:05:53,645 --> 00:05:55,230 - Great. So you booked them? 128 00:05:55,271 --> 00:05:56,898 - Negative. 129 00:05:56,940 --> 00:05:58,858 Your mom wanted to pay them less 130 00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:00,151 because they're female. 131 00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:01,736 Gross. 132 00:06:02,612 --> 00:06:05,281 - It's wrong, but why should everyone benefit except for me? 133 00:06:05,323 --> 00:06:07,242 I didn't invent America. 134 00:06:09,285 --> 00:06:10,954 - I had it all set up, but, of course, 135 00:06:10,995 --> 00:06:12,747 she had to take over like she always does, 136 00:06:12,789 --> 00:06:14,624 and now none of us get to spend Saturday night 137 00:06:14,666 --> 00:06:16,209 with six loud women and a funny dog. 138 00:06:16,251 --> 00:06:19,421 - Oh, see, that's what he always does. 139 00:06:19,462 --> 00:06:20,922 He treats everything like a joke. 140 00:06:20,964 --> 00:06:24,551 And no one is laughing, payaso. 141 00:06:24,592 --> 00:06:26,136 - Well, I'm no one, and I am. 142 00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:30,432 - Okay, okay, everyone take a deep breath. 143 00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:32,851 Not of helium. 144 00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:36,021 This quinces is very important to Churro. 145 00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:38,940 So I'll call and smooth things over with the Mariachi-chis. 146 00:06:38,982 --> 00:06:41,985 And we still need to make 30 more centerpieces. 147 00:06:42,027 --> 00:06:44,612 So, Mom, go in that corner and make 15. 148 00:06:44,654 --> 00:06:47,032 Dad, go in that corner and make two. 149 00:06:49,117 --> 00:06:53,580 - I'll fix his two once he slips into a helium coma. 150 00:06:54,205 --> 00:06:57,125 - Mayan, look. I'm a Mariachi-chi. 151 00:07:01,379 --> 00:07:03,590 - [laughs] 152 00:07:03,631 --> 00:07:07,344 [upbeat saxophone music] 153 00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:11,639 - All right, Tom, let's go flush Jerry out of your molars. 154 00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:18,021 - When you said you wanted to meet somewhere 155 00:07:18,063 --> 00:07:21,524 with a lot of single women, I thought you meant a bar 156 00:07:21,566 --> 00:07:23,693 or a funeral home. 157 00:07:25,695 --> 00:07:27,864 - No better place than cat day at the clinic 158 00:07:27,906 --> 00:07:29,240 to meet lonely women. 159 00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:32,535 - Hey, a cat is a great companion. 160 00:07:32,577 --> 00:07:34,037 And it won't sleep with your friend 161 00:07:34,079 --> 00:07:36,289 when you go to Austin for a weekend. 162 00:07:37,916 --> 00:07:39,250 - Let's give you the lowdown 163 00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:41,252 on some of these eligible bachelorettes. 164 00:07:41,294 --> 00:07:42,212 Brookie? - Yeah. 165 00:07:42,253 --> 00:07:43,463 That's Sharon. 166 00:07:43,505 --> 00:07:45,048 She's a successful businessperson 167 00:07:45,090 --> 00:07:47,717 who designs high-end beanies. 168 00:07:47,759 --> 00:07:50,095 - Wow, I don't think so. 169 00:07:52,097 --> 00:07:56,393 - Okay, Annabelle over there was runner-up in the '97 170 00:07:56,434 --> 00:07:57,894 Miss Mary Jane pageant, 171 00:07:57,936 --> 00:08:01,773 and now she has her own line of beard-friendly bongs. 172 00:08:05,068 --> 00:08:06,152 - Cool. 173 00:08:06,194 --> 00:08:08,238 Yeah, no. 174 00:08:08,279 --> 00:08:09,739 - Damn. 175 00:08:09,781 --> 00:08:11,908 You are picky for a scrub. 176 00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:15,912 What about--oh, Jupiter? 177 00:08:15,954 --> 00:08:19,082 She's a triple-jointed yoga instructor 178 00:08:19,124 --> 00:08:22,877 who teaches sex marathon workshops. 179 00:08:25,130 --> 00:08:26,297 - Pass. 180 00:08:27,382 --> 00:08:28,967 - This man ain't right. 181 00:08:30,885 --> 00:08:33,221 All of these women are great options. 182 00:08:33,263 --> 00:08:34,764 What is the problem? 183 00:08:34,806 --> 00:08:37,600 I'm imagining us out on a date. 184 00:08:37,642 --> 00:08:40,687 And I just don't think George would have a good time. 185 00:08:42,313 --> 00:08:44,357 - Hey, you need to stop letting your life 186 00:08:44,399 --> 00:08:45,734 revolve around George. 187 00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:47,318 Like, don't worry about what he wants. 188 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:48,987 What do you want? 189 00:08:50,613 --> 00:08:52,741 - I'm never gonna find anyone. 190 00:08:52,782 --> 00:08:55,118 - Hey, you will. 191 00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:58,455 And when you do, the connection will be undeniable. 192 00:08:58,496 --> 00:09:00,665 You'll look into their eyes, and you'll know 193 00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:03,001 that this is the person that you were meant to be with 194 00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:04,961 until the end of time. 195 00:09:05,003 --> 00:09:06,796 That's what happened with me and Mayan. 196 00:09:08,089 --> 00:09:10,300 - I thought you knocked her up and were stuck together. 197 00:09:12,344 --> 00:09:13,928 - That too. 198 00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:17,307 [upbeat saxophone music] 199 00:09:17,349 --> 00:09:20,226 - Five, six, seven, eight, and turn. 200 00:09:20,268 --> 00:09:21,936 [dog barks] 201 00:09:22,729 --> 00:09:25,398 - Beautiful footwork, Penny. 202 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:27,150 Alfred, chills. 203 00:09:28,693 --> 00:09:31,196 Bear, you're killing me. 204 00:09:33,448 --> 00:09:35,033 - Great work, Gordo. 205 00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:36,951 - Take five, everybody. 206 00:09:39,079 --> 00:09:40,830 And don't eat any poop. 207 00:09:40,872 --> 00:09:43,041 You've got to fit in those dresses. 208 00:09:44,376 --> 00:09:45,835 - Okay, even though your grandparents 209 00:09:45,877 --> 00:09:47,337 set us a little behind, 210 00:09:47,379 --> 00:09:50,173 the balloon arch is done, the Mariachi-chis are booked. 211 00:09:50,215 --> 00:09:52,050 I think we might actually pull this thing off. 212 00:09:54,052 --> 00:09:55,679 - You missed, bruja! 213 00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:57,097 [loud thump] Ay! 214 00:09:57,138 --> 00:09:59,057 Okay, you got me that time. 215 00:10:00,392 --> 00:10:01,518 - What is going on? 216 00:10:01,559 --> 00:10:02,769 - Like they say, 217 00:10:02,811 --> 00:10:05,146 never work with animals or grandparents. 218 00:10:08,525 --> 00:10:09,818 - Seriously? 219 00:10:09,859 --> 00:10:11,319 - She ruined the centerpiece that I made. 220 00:10:11,361 --> 00:10:12,487 - He was doing it wrong. 221 00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:13,571 - I have my own process. 222 00:10:13,613 --> 00:10:14,698 - You were sniffing the glue. 223 00:10:14,739 --> 00:10:16,241 - That's my process. 224 00:10:17,826 --> 00:10:21,162 Hey, your centerpiece isn't better than the one I made. 225 00:10:22,539 --> 00:10:26,167 - Oh, I'm gonna glue your fat mouth shut. 226 00:10:26,209 --> 00:10:28,670 I'm gonna glue it shut. - Oh, ahh, ow! 227 00:10:28,712 --> 00:10:31,172 - God, stop. Just stop arguing! 228 00:10:31,214 --> 00:10:32,966 - She started it. - He started it. 229 00:10:33,008 --> 00:10:34,551 - You know what, I should have never 230 00:10:34,592 --> 00:10:35,760 asked you guys to do this. 231 00:10:35,802 --> 00:10:37,554 I'm done. Forget the whole thing. 232 00:10:37,595 --> 00:10:39,305 This quinces is canceled. 233 00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:45,854 - Because of this? 234 00:10:45,895 --> 00:10:46,980 [upbeat saxophone music] 235 00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:52,444 [upbeat saxophone music] 236 00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:54,821 - I can't believe Churro's quinces is canceled. 237 00:10:54,863 --> 00:10:58,241 Do you know how hard it was to teach a pug the paso doble? 238 00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:03,163 He has four left feet. 239 00:11:03,913 --> 00:11:05,915 - I'm sorry, buddy. I'm upset too. 240 00:11:05,957 --> 00:11:09,127 I made custom evening wear for ten dogs. 241 00:11:09,169 --> 00:11:11,212 - I saw the dresses. 242 00:11:11,254 --> 00:11:13,006 Yeah, maybe it's for the best. 243 00:11:15,884 --> 00:11:18,303 - Quinten, you beautiful white bitch. 244 00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:21,931 - Oh, thank you. 245 00:11:21,973 --> 00:11:23,892 What did I do to deserve that? 246 00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:26,811 - I used your advice, and it worked. 247 00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:28,563 I met an amazing woman. 248 00:11:28,605 --> 00:11:31,816 - See, when faced with a problem in life, 249 00:11:31,858 --> 00:11:33,360 no matter how big and insurmountable, 250 00:11:33,401 --> 00:11:36,446 the answer is always less George. 251 00:11:37,906 --> 00:11:39,741 So tell me about the lucky girl. 252 00:11:39,783 --> 00:11:41,910 - Her name is Gina, 253 00:11:41,951 --> 00:11:44,788 and our connection was undeniable. 254 00:11:44,829 --> 00:11:46,539 We were both at 7-Eleven at 3:00 a.m. 255 00:11:46,581 --> 00:11:49,834 reaching for the same six-pack of Bud Light Clamato. 256 00:11:49,876 --> 00:11:51,586 Our hands touched. 257 00:11:51,628 --> 00:11:53,838 I mean, it was electric. 258 00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:55,840 She was way out of my league, man. 259 00:11:55,882 --> 00:11:57,342 I mean, I'm, like, a 7, 260 00:11:57,384 --> 00:11:59,803 and she's, like, a 10, even more than a 10, 261 00:11:59,844 --> 00:12:01,429 like, an 11, and I was thinking, 262 00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:04,015 "Can a 7 and an 11 even be together? 263 00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:05,558 Can they?" 264 00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:09,437 And then I looked up, and I saw a sign, "7-Eleven." 265 00:12:09,479 --> 00:12:12,857 And it was just meant to be, dude. 266 00:12:12,899 --> 00:12:14,359 And then guess what. 267 00:12:14,401 --> 00:12:19,572 We went home together and dry-humped. 268 00:12:24,411 --> 00:12:26,955 - A greater love story has never been told. 269 00:12:26,996 --> 00:12:29,207 Move over, "Titanic." 270 00:12:29,249 --> 00:12:32,377 [upbeat saxophone music] 271 00:12:32,419 --> 00:12:34,337 * * 272 00:12:34,963 --> 00:12:36,047 - I mean, it's been a few hours. 273 00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:37,382 You think Mayan's still mad? 274 00:12:37,424 --> 00:12:39,634 - She was upset about a dog's birthday party. 275 00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:41,928 I'm sure she's fine. 276 00:12:41,970 --> 00:12:44,723 - [sobbing] 277 00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:46,725 - Okay, she's not fine. 278 00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:48,393 - [sobbing] 279 00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:51,271 - Mayan, this breaks my heart. 280 00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:54,441 You ordered McDonald's without me? 281 00:12:56,026 --> 00:12:57,402 - Go away! 282 00:12:57,444 --> 00:13:00,739 I can't believe you ruined another quinces. 283 00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:02,323 - What do you mean by another? 284 00:13:02,365 --> 00:13:05,160 - I only remember ruining this one. 285 00:13:05,201 --> 00:13:08,079 How many other dog quinces have you thrown? 286 00:13:08,121 --> 00:13:11,666 - I'm talking about my quinces ten years ago. 287 00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:13,001 - Your quinces? 288 00:13:13,043 --> 00:13:15,128 You didn't have one because you didn't want one. 289 00:13:15,170 --> 00:13:17,213 - I said I didn't want one, but I did. 290 00:13:18,423 --> 00:13:19,924 I lied. 291 00:13:19,966 --> 00:13:21,843 - Why would you do that? 292 00:13:21,885 --> 00:13:23,428 - I don't read minds. 293 00:13:23,470 --> 00:13:26,473 And your father, well, he doesn't read anything. 294 00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,852 - It was the year you guys were getting a divorce. 295 00:13:30,894 --> 00:13:33,438 Why would I have a party when you guys couldn't even be 296 00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:35,815 in the same room without screaming at each other? 297 00:13:35,857 --> 00:13:38,401 - Oh, Mayan, I mean, the party wouldn't have been 298 00:13:38,443 --> 00:13:41,529 more dramatic or louder than any other Latino party. 299 00:13:43,198 --> 00:13:44,491 - I turned 15, 300 00:13:44,532 --> 00:13:46,659 but without the pink decorations, 301 00:13:46,701 --> 00:13:49,287 the lavender dress, and the mariachi band 302 00:13:49,329 --> 00:13:53,166 playing "Diamonds" by Rihanna in español. 303 00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:57,170 It was the first of many sacrifices 304 00:13:57,212 --> 00:13:59,047 I would have to make after you guys separated. 305 00:14:01,675 --> 00:14:05,637 - Mayan, I don't know how to say this, 306 00:14:05,679 --> 00:14:08,682 but I believe it's pronounced "Rih-ah-na." 307 00:14:10,058 --> 00:14:12,977 - Not now, borracho. 308 00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:16,648 - I was so stupid to think that we could do this as a family. 309 00:14:17,899 --> 00:14:20,193 The party's ruined. The dog adoption's ruined. 310 00:14:20,235 --> 00:14:24,030 And I can't find my honey mustard. 311 00:14:25,448 --> 00:14:28,576 [upbeat saxophone music] 312 00:14:28,618 --> 00:14:30,870 * * 313 00:14:30,912 --> 00:14:32,622 - I've lost my appetite. 314 00:14:32,664 --> 00:14:35,750 Mayan's tears made this bun soggy. 315 00:14:37,794 --> 00:14:40,296 - Oh, seeing her cry really took me back 316 00:14:40,338 --> 00:14:42,674 to when we first told her we were getting a divorce. 317 00:14:42,716 --> 00:14:44,259 She was hurting so much. 318 00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:46,219 - We all were. 319 00:14:46,261 --> 00:14:48,096 Maybe we should have held it together better 320 00:14:48,138 --> 00:14:49,514 in front of her. 321 00:14:49,556 --> 00:14:52,726 Yeah, maybe we could have yelled at each other 322 00:14:52,767 --> 00:14:54,060 in an empty parking lot 323 00:14:54,102 --> 00:14:55,437 and not in Mayan's school parking lot 324 00:14:55,478 --> 00:14:57,522 in front of all her friends. 325 00:14:59,024 --> 00:15:01,026 - I mean, I've been trying to make amends with Mayan, 326 00:15:01,067 --> 00:15:03,361 but I can't do that 327 00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:05,780 unless I also make amends with you too. 328 00:15:06,698 --> 00:15:08,950 - And I could stand to treat you better too 329 00:15:08,992 --> 00:15:10,744 now that we're a family again. 330 00:15:12,078 --> 00:15:13,371 - But you're still going home 331 00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:15,623 to your place tonight, though, right? 332 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,627 - Yes. 333 00:15:21,046 --> 00:15:22,547 Ay. 334 00:15:22,589 --> 00:15:25,300 I feel terrible that we've ruined things today. 335 00:15:25,342 --> 00:15:26,593 Do you think we can fix it? 336 00:15:26,634 --> 00:15:28,136 - No, I don't. 337 00:15:28,178 --> 00:15:30,305 That burger's been compromised. 338 00:15:31,473 --> 00:15:32,599 Oh, you mean the thing with Mayan? 339 00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:34,309 Oh, yeah, yeah, we gotta make that right. 340 00:15:34,351 --> 00:15:35,810 [upbeat saxophone music] 341 00:15:39,314 --> 00:15:42,400 [upbeat saxophone music] 342 00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:44,444 - It's sad that we can't use all these dresses, 343 00:15:44,486 --> 00:15:46,321 but I guess lucky that the church is throwing 344 00:15:46,363 --> 00:15:49,032 a dog clothing drive. 345 00:15:49,074 --> 00:15:50,950 - Yeah, I made that up. 346 00:15:50,992 --> 00:15:54,412 You will believe anything when you're loopy on honey mustard. 347 00:15:56,915 --> 00:15:58,833 both: Surprise! 348 00:16:00,835 --> 00:16:02,337 - Oh, my God. 349 00:16:05,173 --> 00:16:07,133 It's perfect. 350 00:16:07,175 --> 00:16:09,302 You got everything I wanted. 351 00:16:09,344 --> 00:16:11,304 How did you make this happen so fast? 352 00:16:11,346 --> 00:16:13,515 - I did everything your mom told me to do. 353 00:16:15,350 --> 00:16:17,560 - [high pitched] And we even had a little fun. 354 00:16:20,188 --> 00:16:22,941 I had it altered and cleaned. 355 00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:26,194 You shouldn't smell like ground beef around those dogs. 356 00:16:26,903 --> 00:16:28,571 - Thank you. 357 00:16:30,365 --> 00:16:32,534 - [chuckles] 358 00:16:32,575 --> 00:16:34,828 It was a lot of work, Rosie, but it was well worth it... 359 00:16:34,869 --> 00:16:37,497 just to see the smile on that chihuahua's face. 360 00:16:39,541 --> 00:16:43,461 [upbeat saxophone music] 361 00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:46,548 - Welcome to Churro's quinces! 362 00:16:46,589 --> 00:16:49,592 [cheers and applause] 363 00:16:49,634 --> 00:16:51,928 - Sorry there's no churros or quesadillas, 364 00:16:51,970 --> 00:16:55,432 but we spared no expense on dog water, so drink up. 365 00:16:55,473 --> 00:16:58,184 [cheers and applause] 366 00:16:58,226 --> 00:16:59,519 Now let's bring out the court. 367 00:16:59,561 --> 00:17:01,354 Vámonos! [whistles] 368 00:17:01,396 --> 00:17:04,357 [gentle music] 369 00:17:04,399 --> 00:17:09,195 * * 370 00:17:09,237 --> 00:17:11,239 - Everyone look adoptable. 371 00:17:11,281 --> 00:17:12,615 Your life is on the line. 372 00:17:12,657 --> 00:17:19,581 * * 373 00:17:22,876 --> 00:17:25,211 - * Como diamante brillamos * 374 00:17:25,253 --> 00:17:27,297 - It's happening, Churro. 375 00:17:27,339 --> 00:17:29,716 We're finally becoming women. 376 00:17:29,758 --> 00:17:33,553 * * 377 00:17:33,595 --> 00:17:36,139 - * Hay luz reflejada en el mar * 378 00:17:36,181 --> 00:17:38,391 * Tu alegría está en mí * 379 00:17:38,433 --> 00:17:41,311 * Tú y yo, tú y yo * 380 00:17:41,353 --> 00:17:43,813 * Como diamantes al brillar * 381 00:17:43,855 --> 00:17:45,440 * Eres como un estrella fugaz * 382 00:17:45,482 --> 00:17:49,235 - Oh, she's so beautiful. 383 00:17:49,277 --> 00:17:51,863 - Will you stop focusing on Churro? 384 00:17:51,905 --> 00:17:53,907 We finally figured out this is Mayan's day. 385 00:17:53,948 --> 00:17:57,452 - * We're beautiful like diamonds in the sky * 386 00:17:57,494 --> 00:18:00,246 [upbeat electronic music] 387 00:18:00,288 --> 00:18:01,414 [dog barks] 388 00:18:01,456 --> 00:18:03,500 * Shine bright like a diamond * 389 00:18:03,541 --> 00:18:05,502 * Shine bright like a diamond * 390 00:18:05,543 --> 00:18:06,961 * Shining bright like a diamond * 391 00:18:07,003 --> 00:18:09,339 * Beautiful like diamonds in the sky * 392 00:18:09,381 --> 00:18:10,965 * Shine bright like a diamond * 393 00:18:11,007 --> 00:18:12,926 * Shine bright like a diamond * 394 00:18:12,967 --> 00:18:14,636 * Shining bright like a diamond * 395 00:18:14,678 --> 00:18:19,349 * Beautiful like diamonds in the sky * 396 00:18:19,391 --> 00:18:22,477 [cheers and applause] 397 00:18:25,271 --> 00:18:28,858 [upbeat music] 398 00:18:28,900 --> 00:18:30,443 - Sorry I haven't had time to meet your date. 399 00:18:30,485 --> 00:18:31,945 I've been trying to stop these dogs 400 00:18:31,986 --> 00:18:35,615 from desecrating the church, and I am failing miserably. 401 00:18:35,657 --> 00:18:37,158 - I can't wait for you to meet Gina. 402 00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:38,618 I don't know what it is, 403 00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:42,247 but I feel like I've known her for years. 404 00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:43,623 - That's great. 405 00:18:43,665 --> 00:18:45,417 I'm glad you're finally moving on from George. 406 00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:48,670 - What's up, fools? Hee-yah! 407 00:18:50,171 --> 00:18:52,215 - Quinten, this is Gina. 408 00:18:52,257 --> 00:18:54,926 Well, Georgina. She goes by Gina. 409 00:18:56,302 --> 00:18:59,431 - It's nice to meet you, George...ina. 410 00:18:59,472 --> 00:19:02,851 - The pleasure's all yours, Macklesnore! 411 00:19:02,892 --> 00:19:04,811 [laughs] 412 00:19:04,853 --> 00:19:06,688 - Isn't she great? - Yeah. 413 00:19:06,730 --> 00:19:09,107 Hey, if you're happy, I'm happy. 414 00:19:09,149 --> 00:19:10,942 I'm never gonna get that dry-humping story 415 00:19:10,984 --> 00:19:12,527 out of my head. 416 00:19:16,573 --> 00:19:18,033 - [clears throat] 417 00:19:18,074 --> 00:19:20,952 We just want to thank everyone for coming to celebrate 418 00:19:20,994 --> 00:19:22,787 the woman of the hour. 419 00:19:23,747 --> 00:19:26,124 We're so proud of you. 420 00:19:26,166 --> 00:19:29,336 - You're a great daughter, a loving partner, 421 00:19:29,377 --> 00:19:31,338 and an amazing mother. 422 00:19:31,379 --> 00:19:33,506 And every day when I look in your face, 423 00:19:33,548 --> 00:19:35,842 I see so much of Rosie. 424 00:19:35,884 --> 00:19:38,511 - You better still be talking about Mayan like I am. 425 00:19:42,057 --> 00:19:45,935 We're sorry that our problems made you grow up so fast. 426 00:19:45,977 --> 00:19:48,104 And we're glad that we are finally able 427 00:19:48,146 --> 00:19:50,565 to give you the day you always wanted. 428 00:19:51,441 --> 00:19:53,109 - We love you so much. 429 00:19:53,151 --> 00:19:55,028 And we know that this day celebrates you 430 00:19:55,070 --> 00:19:56,863 becoming a woman, 431 00:19:56,905 --> 00:19:59,324 but you'll always be our little girl. 432 00:19:59,366 --> 00:20:02,535 So, everyone, can we raise a glass 433 00:20:02,577 --> 00:20:05,663 or a bowl? 434 00:20:05,705 --> 00:20:09,709 To Churro! all: To Churro! 435 00:20:09,751 --> 00:20:12,545 - If she could hear any of this, 436 00:20:12,587 --> 00:20:13,797 she'd be crying too. 437 00:20:13,838 --> 00:20:15,924 - Oh, Mayan. - Oh. 438 00:20:19,386 --> 00:20:21,805 - Man, they really love that dog. 439 00:20:23,932 --> 00:20:26,768 - It's a good thing you're cute, dummy. 440 00:20:29,187 --> 00:20:31,106 [upbeat music] 441 00:20:31,147 --> 00:20:33,441 - They're playing my song! 442 00:20:33,483 --> 00:20:40,615 * * 443 00:20:50,667 --> 00:20:52,252 Come on, man, what's with all these water bowls? 444 00:20:52,293 --> 00:20:54,462 You have to have a beer back there somewhere. 445 00:20:55,797 --> 00:20:59,134 - Here, I got you, homes. 446 00:21:02,053 --> 00:21:04,931 - Thanks. You're here with Oscar, huh? 447 00:21:04,973 --> 00:21:06,141 I hope you don't mind me saying, 448 00:21:06,182 --> 00:21:08,810 but I think you're way out of his league. 449 00:21:08,852 --> 00:21:10,270 - I know. 450 00:21:10,311 --> 00:21:12,272 But he adores me. 451 00:21:12,313 --> 00:21:14,482 And I adore letting him do everything for me. 452 00:21:14,524 --> 00:21:16,192 [laughter] 453 00:21:16,234 --> 00:21:17,360 - That's what's up. 454 00:21:17,402 --> 00:21:20,822 - Hey, no beer in church. 455 00:21:22,824 --> 00:21:25,201 both: I can never do nothing! 456 00:21:27,245 --> 00:21:28,830 [upbeat saxophone music]