1
00:00:04,921 --> 00:00:06,798
[upbeat saxophone music]
2
00:00:12,053 --> 00:00:13,054
Good morning, George.
3
00:00:13,054 --> 00:00:15,640
Why are you yelling at me?
4
00:00:17,809 --> 00:00:20,103
Do you remember what you did
last night?
5
00:00:20,103 --> 00:00:22,188
Uh, went out
for a few drinks,
6
00:00:22,188 --> 00:00:24,774
so you know I don't.
7
00:00:26,526 --> 00:00:29,279
Luckily, we have Ring camera
footage to remind you.
8
00:00:29,279 --> 00:00:31,614
Mayan, we don't have
a Ring camera.
9
00:00:31,614 --> 00:00:34,284
No.
But our neighbors do.
10
00:00:36,828 --> 00:00:39,330
Come on, key, get in there!
11
00:00:39,330 --> 00:00:41,624
How come you're not working?
12
00:00:45,295 --> 00:00:47,505
Because this one.
13
00:00:49,924 --> 00:00:53,386
[snoring]
14
00:01:01,019 --> 00:01:03,480
That could be any
sexy Mexican man
15
00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:06,900
eating a wing platter for 12.
16
00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:08,902
We need to talk about this.
17
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:10,570
It's none of your business.
18
00:01:10,570 --> 00:01:12,113
I was having a private moment
19
00:01:12,113 --> 00:01:14,491
on our neighbor's porch!
20
00:01:16,242 --> 00:01:19,162
[upbeat saxophone music]
21
00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:26,336
♪ ♪
22
00:01:31,216 --> 00:01:33,760
Okay, Gordo.
23
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:36,930
{\an8}I bought you some supplies
for your hero presentation.
24
00:01:36,930 --> 00:01:39,766
{\an8}Construction paper, glue,
25
00:01:39,766 --> 00:01:43,353
{\an8}a spotlight
because you're a star.
26
00:01:44,854 --> 00:01:46,272
{\an8}Thanks, Nana.
27
00:01:46,272 --> 00:01:49,317
{\an8}So did you decide
who your hero is?
28
00:01:49,317 --> 00:01:51,778
{\an8}Abraham Lincoln,
Martin Luther King,
29
00:01:51,778 --> 00:01:53,988
{\an8}me?
30
00:01:53,988 --> 00:01:56,700
{\an8}I chose a real hero--
31
00:01:56,700 --> 00:01:58,284
{\an8}Grandpa!
32
00:01:58,284 --> 00:02:00,578
{\an8}Orale! That's what's up!
33
00:02:00,578 --> 00:02:03,581
{\an8}I suddenly can't feel
my legs.
34
00:02:03,581 --> 00:02:06,751
{\an8}First,
I'd like to thank myself
35
00:02:06,751 --> 00:02:08,962
{\an8}for being awesome.
36
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:10,296
{\an8}Second, I'd like to thank Rosie
37
00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:11,881
{\an8}for falling short
in comparison.
38
00:02:15,176 --> 00:02:17,053
{\an8}The more
I get to know Grandpa,
39
00:02:17,053 --> 00:02:18,805
{\an8}the more cool stuff I learn.
40
00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:20,432
{\an8}Plus, he's funny,
41
00:02:20,432 --> 00:02:23,018
{\an8}and I think his toilet humor
will translate well
42
00:02:23,018 --> 00:02:25,270
{\an8}to the second grade.
43
00:02:25,270 --> 00:02:26,813
{\an8}Teacher, I know the answer.
44
00:02:26,813 --> 00:02:29,024
{\an8}[buzzes tongue]
45
00:02:29,024 --> 00:02:30,692
{\an8}I need to take this back
46
00:02:30,692 --> 00:02:34,362
{\an8}and have a good,
hard look at my life.
47
00:02:35,655 --> 00:02:37,157
{\an8}Hey, can we talk to you
for a minute?
48
00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:38,491
{\an8}Uh, yeah, make it quick.
49
00:02:38,491 --> 00:02:40,660
{\an8}I only got an hour left
on my Peacock free trial.
50
00:02:43,663 --> 00:02:45,498
{\an8}Dad, you dismissed me
last night,
51
00:02:45,498 --> 00:02:47,667
{\an8}but we gotta talk to you
about your drinking.
52
00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:49,878
{\an8}- [sighs]
- It's getting out of control.
53
00:02:49,878 --> 00:02:51,254
{\an8}You had a blackout.
54
00:02:51,254 --> 00:02:54,049
{\an8}Mayan, I'm Mexican.
55
00:02:54,049 --> 00:02:56,343
{\an8}It was a brown-out.
56
00:02:56,343 --> 00:02:58,011
{\an8}Alcohol is in our blood.
57
00:02:58,011 --> 00:03:00,805
{\an8}They say my mom drank the whole
time she was pregnant with me.
58
00:03:00,805 --> 00:03:04,392
{\an8}Word is, I blew a 0.7
in the incubator.
59
00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:07,812
{\an8}I mean, I just haven't
seen you that drunk
60
00:03:07,812 --> 00:03:09,147
{\an8}since I was a kid.
61
00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:11,858
{\an8}You threw up at my middle
school choir performance.
62
00:03:11,858 --> 00:03:14,402
I wasn't drunk, Mayan.
That was my commentary.
63
00:03:16,071 --> 00:03:19,699
And if I'm so bad, why did
Chance make me his hero?
64
00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:22,952
Because he's seven
and has terrible judgment.
65
00:03:22,952 --> 00:03:25,580
You should be setting
a better example.
66
00:03:25,580 --> 00:03:26,831
Man, you know what?
67
00:03:26,831 --> 00:03:29,292
I can't ever do nothing
in this house!
68
00:03:29,292 --> 00:03:32,629
Don't dismiss this
with your catchphrase.
69
00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:34,589
You're just jealous
because your catchphrase is,
70
00:03:34,589 --> 00:03:36,883
"Daaad."
71
00:03:38,802 --> 00:03:42,430
♪ ♪
72
00:03:42,430 --> 00:03:44,307
Oh, what's all this?
73
00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:47,060
Making lunch for your father?
74
00:03:47,060 --> 00:03:49,062
[sighs] No.
75
00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:50,897
I'm watering down his liquor.
76
00:03:50,897 --> 00:03:53,733
I'm just worried Dad's gonna
backslide into his old ways.
77
00:03:53,733 --> 00:03:55,568
As a vet tech,
you should know
78
00:03:55,568 --> 00:03:57,529
you can't teach an old dog
new tricks.
79
00:03:57,529 --> 00:03:59,406
You just gotta put 'em down.
80
00:04:02,033 --> 00:04:03,451
I mean, I can't imagine
81
00:04:03,451 --> 00:04:05,495
what all this drinking is doing
to Dad's health.
82
00:04:05,495 --> 00:04:09,416
His internal organs must look
like chorizo by now.
83
00:04:09,416 --> 00:04:11,918
Who knows? I mean,
he's never seen a doctor.
84
00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:14,337
Unless you count the one
from his favorite movie,
85
00:04:14,337 --> 00:04:16,798
"Boobie Howser Double D."
86
00:04:18,341 --> 00:04:20,677
That's how we get him
to stop drinking.
87
00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:22,595
The doctor will say
he's in terrible shape
88
00:04:22,595 --> 00:04:24,389
and he's gotta cut back.
89
00:04:24,389 --> 00:04:26,141
Well, good luck.
90
00:04:26,141 --> 00:04:27,892
I mean, he didn't even go
that time that he threw up
91
00:04:27,892 --> 00:04:31,354
an entire canary
like a cartoon cat.
92
00:04:32,439 --> 00:04:34,315
I can't make him go,
93
00:04:34,315 --> 00:04:37,360
but as CFO of Lop-EZ Movers,
you can.
94
00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:39,487
Just say it's
for insurance purposes.
95
00:04:39,487 --> 00:04:41,031
That could work.
96
00:04:41,031 --> 00:04:42,741
Plus, it's always a good day
97
00:04:42,741 --> 00:04:46,244
when I get to deceive
your father.
98
00:04:46,244 --> 00:04:47,454
♪ ♪
99
00:04:50,749 --> 00:04:52,250
[upbeat saxophone music]
100
00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:54,753
I don't know why Rosie's
forcing me to go to the doctor.
101
00:04:54,753 --> 00:04:56,504
He already said I was healthy
when he told my mom
102
00:04:56,504 --> 00:04:58,173
I had ten fingers, ten toes,
103
00:04:58,173 --> 00:04:59,966
and three legs.
104
00:05:03,595 --> 00:05:05,263
That was 60 years ago.
105
00:05:05,263 --> 00:05:07,432
Don't you think a few things
might've changed since then?
106
00:05:07,432 --> 00:05:11,227
Nope.
I still have three legs.
107
00:05:11,227 --> 00:05:12,687
And enough soda.
108
00:05:12,687 --> 00:05:14,647
Despite what
your grandmother told you,
109
00:05:14,647 --> 00:05:17,567
you can't burp up everything
that's wrong with you.
110
00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:20,487
Lies.
111
00:05:20,487 --> 00:05:22,447
My Tío Chavo was declared
legally dead
112
00:05:22,447 --> 00:05:24,491
at Knott's Berry Farm
113
00:05:24,491 --> 00:05:27,410
until Snoopy poured some 7UP
in his mouth
114
00:05:27,410 --> 00:05:30,205
and burped him back to life.
115
00:05:30,205 --> 00:05:33,208
I know you're scared,
so I brought you something
116
00:05:33,208 --> 00:05:34,584
that'll make you feel better.
117
00:05:34,584 --> 00:05:35,960
Mayan, I'm a grown-ass man.
118
00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:37,837
Do you really think a l--
ooh, red.
119
00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:40,715
Don't worry, Dad.
120
00:05:40,715 --> 00:05:42,258
No matter what
the doctor tells you,
121
00:05:42,258 --> 00:05:45,679
even if you have to make
some big lifestyle changes,
122
00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:46,846
we're gonna face it together.
123
00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:48,264
Mayan, you can't
trust doctors.
124
00:05:48,264 --> 00:05:49,724
They make you sick.
125
00:05:49,724 --> 00:05:52,394
Right now,
I don't have tuberculosis.
126
00:05:52,394 --> 00:05:53,770
But they're gonna
run some tests,
127
00:05:53,770 --> 00:05:56,690
and then suddenly,
I'm gonna have tuberculosis.
128
00:05:58,733 --> 00:06:01,611
So you think that doctors
give you tuberculosis?
129
00:06:04,155 --> 00:06:05,532
Yeah.
130
00:06:05,532 --> 00:06:10,662
♪ ♪
131
00:06:11,871 --> 00:06:13,832
George, is everything okay?
132
00:06:15,709 --> 00:06:18,545
I just got the results
from my physical.
133
00:06:20,505 --> 00:06:22,007
Remember, Dad,
we're here for you,
134
00:06:22,007 --> 00:06:23,550
no matter what.
135
00:06:23,550 --> 00:06:25,301
I am...
136
00:06:25,301 --> 00:06:27,012
in perfect health!
137
00:06:33,226 --> 00:06:37,689
I have been diagnosed
with "in your face" syndrome.
138
00:06:40,650 --> 00:06:44,529
Normal, normal... excellent?
139
00:06:46,531 --> 00:06:49,200
How is your liver
not a Craisin?
140
00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:53,079
I guess I'm so invincible,
141
00:06:53,079 --> 00:06:56,708
I think I should probably join
the Fantastic Four Lokos.
142
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:02,547
I guess your dad is just
one of those people
143
00:07:02,547 --> 00:07:04,132
who can drink
as much as they want
144
00:07:04,132 --> 00:07:05,675
without it affecting
their health.
145
00:07:05,675 --> 00:07:07,677
Like me with cheese.
146
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:10,847
I'm so powerful,
147
00:07:10,847 --> 00:07:13,516
this tequila has started
to taste like water.
148
00:07:15,894 --> 00:07:18,146
I watered down your liquor.
149
00:07:18,146 --> 00:07:19,647
What?
150
00:07:19,647 --> 00:07:22,776
Mayan,
that's a $9 bottle of tequila!
151
00:07:25,695 --> 00:07:28,323
Because you have
a drinking problem.
152
00:07:28,323 --> 00:07:29,824
The only problem is,
153
00:07:29,824 --> 00:07:32,410
you won't let me do it
in peace.
154
00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:34,245
My drinking hasn't hurt anyone.
155
00:07:34,245 --> 00:07:37,957
If anything, it's brought
millions of people joy.
156
00:07:39,209 --> 00:07:40,752
That is true.
157
00:07:40,752 --> 00:07:43,713
His Ring cam footage
went viral on Nextdoor.
158
00:07:45,924 --> 00:07:48,301
You know what?
I can't win with you.
159
00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:49,636
Ever since I moved in,
160
00:07:49,636 --> 00:07:51,304
I've done everything
that you've asked,
161
00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:53,056
and it's never enough.
162
00:07:53,056 --> 00:07:55,225
I'm starting to think
that there's no point
163
00:07:55,225 --> 00:07:57,185
in even trying.
164
00:07:57,185 --> 00:07:59,396
Okay, I don't want you
to feel that way.
165
00:07:59,396 --> 00:08:01,106
You have done a lot.
166
00:08:01,106 --> 00:08:03,149
I don't need to be
watering down your drinks
167
00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:05,443
or tricking you
into going to the doctor.
168
00:08:05,443 --> 00:08:06,695
Wait a minute,
that was a setup?
169
00:08:06,695 --> 00:08:08,571
You told me
that was for insurance!
170
00:08:10,281 --> 00:08:12,450
Mayan made me do it.
171
00:08:12,450 --> 00:08:15,912
I get no joy in deceiving you.
172
00:08:19,582 --> 00:08:22,711
And I did not know,
173
00:08:22,711 --> 00:08:24,337
because like Mayan always says,
174
00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:25,880
the less I know, the better.
175
00:08:30,301 --> 00:08:32,804
I can't believe
you lied to me, Mayan.
176
00:08:32,804 --> 00:08:35,890
You're the only person
I ever trusted,
177
00:08:35,890 --> 00:08:38,018
and now that's gone.
178
00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:39,394
Come on, Dad,
you don't mean that.
179
00:08:39,394 --> 00:08:42,105
Am I even really your dad?
180
00:08:44,065 --> 00:08:46,276
Or have you lied
about that too?
181
00:08:47,944 --> 00:08:49,404
Okay, where are you going?
182
00:08:49,404 --> 00:08:51,114
To go get a real drink
183
00:08:51,114 --> 00:08:53,450
that hasn't been watered down
by my daughter,
184
00:08:53,450 --> 00:08:56,202
but by a real bartender!
185
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:59,998
♪ ♪
186
00:09:03,501 --> 00:09:04,919
[upbeat saxophone music]
187
00:09:07,839 --> 00:09:09,257
Two more.
188
00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:12,761
You're, uh, still upset
about what Mayan did, huh?
189
00:09:12,761 --> 00:09:15,180
Course I am.
190
00:09:15,180 --> 00:09:17,223
She lied to me.
191
00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:20,060
She thinks I have
a drinking problem.
192
00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:24,272
You do not have
a problem drinking.
193
00:09:25,398 --> 00:09:29,110
You just have a problem
sobering up.
194
00:09:29,110 --> 00:09:31,696
My mom was someone
with a real problem.
195
00:09:31,696 --> 00:09:34,115
She drank herself so numb.
196
00:09:34,115 --> 00:09:36,534
She let me go hungry.
I was three years old,
197
00:09:36,534 --> 00:09:39,329
on the streets looking
for food in dumpsters.
198
00:09:39,329 --> 00:09:41,122
Ohh.
199
00:09:41,122 --> 00:09:44,292
So that's why you eat
out of the trash.
200
00:09:44,292 --> 00:09:46,294
It's comfort food.
201
00:09:47,962 --> 00:09:52,467
Eventually, child protective
services took me away.
202
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:56,262
I never saw my mom again.
203
00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:01,810
Your mom gave you
trust issues.
204
00:10:01,810 --> 00:10:05,021
And when Mayan tricked you,
205
00:10:05,021 --> 00:10:07,273
it brought up
all those feelings.
206
00:10:07,273 --> 00:10:08,942
You see?
207
00:10:08,942 --> 00:10:11,069
It's so obvious,
even you get it.
208
00:10:14,239 --> 00:10:16,658
Maybe you should tell
some of this stuff to Mayan.
209
00:10:16,658 --> 00:10:20,036
No, man, it's bad enough
I had to grow up around it.
210
00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:22,330
I don't want her thinking
about all that sad stuff.
211
00:10:22,330 --> 00:10:24,833
I have to protect her.
I'm her father.
212
00:10:24,833 --> 00:10:26,876
Or so she says.
213
00:10:26,876 --> 00:10:31,381
♪ ♪
214
00:10:31,381 --> 00:10:33,883
Oh, good,
you're home, Grandpa.
215
00:10:33,883 --> 00:10:36,469
- I'm here!
- Ah!
216
00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:37,929
Oh, you're screaming?
217
00:10:37,929 --> 00:10:40,432
You should have seen me
before I disinfected this bed.
218
00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:44,477
I know you and your...
219
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:47,522
hero grandpa
220
00:10:47,522 --> 00:10:49,190
have slumber parties.
221
00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:51,026
So I thought maybe
we could have one.
222
00:10:51,026 --> 00:10:53,236
Slumber parties
are for girls.
223
00:10:53,236 --> 00:10:57,574
We men have pajama jammy jams.
224
00:10:57,574 --> 00:10:59,159
Okay.
225
00:10:59,159 --> 00:11:00,577
Well, what do we do first?
226
00:11:00,577 --> 00:11:02,746
Burp contest!
227
00:11:02,746 --> 00:11:04,289
[burps]
228
00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:06,708
Strong start for me.
229
00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:08,585
Your turn, Nana.
230
00:11:08,585 --> 00:11:10,962
Women can't do that.
231
00:11:10,962 --> 00:11:12,339
Can women fart?
232
00:11:12,339 --> 00:11:15,091
Absolutely not.
233
00:11:15,091 --> 00:11:17,510
I guess I'll just
be second banana
234
00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:19,679
to a gassy gorilla.
235
00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:21,931
Nana, I know you're jealous,
236
00:11:21,931 --> 00:11:23,558
but you shouldn't be.
237
00:11:23,558 --> 00:11:25,727
Grandpa might be my hero,
238
00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:27,896
but you're
so much more than that.
239
00:11:27,896 --> 00:11:30,106
You're my angel.
240
00:11:30,106 --> 00:11:33,109
Thank you, Gordo.
241
00:11:33,109 --> 00:11:36,529
Angels are God's heroes.
242
00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:39,449
♪ ♪
243
00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:40,909
You coming to bed?
244
00:11:40,909 --> 00:11:44,162
We can have a pajama jammy jam.
245
00:11:44,162 --> 00:11:45,538
I'm waiting up for my dad.
246
00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:47,415
Is he still out drinking
with Oscar?
247
00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:50,168
Yeah.
He left pretty upset.
248
00:11:50,168 --> 00:11:53,713
You know, maybe he and the guy
at Baskin-Robbins are right.
249
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:56,424
I ask for too much.
250
00:11:58,093 --> 00:12:00,428
Do not blame yourself.
251
00:12:00,428 --> 00:12:02,013
If they're gonna have
31 flavors,
252
00:12:02,013 --> 00:12:04,265
you have the right
to taste them all.
253
00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:07,227
You know,
maybe I shouldn't nitpick
254
00:12:07,227 --> 00:12:08,728
on the one thing he does wrong
255
00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:10,063
when he does so much right.
256
00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:11,981
[ringtone chiming]
257
00:12:11,981 --> 00:12:13,525
Oh, it's Oscar.
258
00:12:14,776 --> 00:12:16,111
Hey.
259
00:12:17,153 --> 00:12:19,572
Wait, you're where?
260
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:21,574
Oh, my God.
261
00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:23,785
Okay, we'll be right over.
262
00:12:23,785 --> 00:12:26,037
My dad just had an accident.
He's in the hospital.
263
00:12:27,706 --> 00:12:30,875
[monitor beeping]
264
00:12:30,875 --> 00:12:33,294
What happened?
265
00:12:33,294 --> 00:12:37,173
Wait, did you guys trick me
into seeing another doctor?
266
00:12:37,173 --> 00:12:39,426
No,
you got so drunk at Loba's
267
00:12:39,426 --> 00:12:42,012
that you fell
and busted your head open.
268
00:12:42,012 --> 00:12:43,930
Look, I'm fine, all right?
269
00:12:43,930 --> 00:12:47,517
I'm so healthy,
I'm donating blood.
270
00:12:47,517 --> 00:12:49,811
No, you're getting
a transfusion.
271
00:12:49,811 --> 00:12:51,688
I'm getting blood?
272
00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:53,273
This is it.
273
00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:56,860
This is how I'ma get
the tuberculosis.
274
00:12:56,860 --> 00:12:59,195
Ay. Ay.
275
00:12:59,195 --> 00:13:01,948
We know where this blood
came from.
276
00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:03,825
You're lucky we had a match
in the family.
277
00:13:03,825 --> 00:13:05,869
Thank you, Mayan.
I owe you.
278
00:13:05,869 --> 00:13:07,579
If you ever need
to fail a drug test,
279
00:13:07,579 --> 00:13:09,247
you can have my urine.
280
00:13:10,915 --> 00:13:13,043
I'm not the one you owe.
281
00:13:13,043 --> 00:13:15,128
Hey! There he is!
282
00:13:15,128 --> 00:13:17,088
My blood brother.
283
00:13:19,090 --> 00:13:21,551
I am inside you now.
284
00:13:24,095 --> 00:13:26,097
So I'm part white boy now?
285
00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:29,434
Hey...
286
00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:32,020
you guys wanna play pickleball?
287
00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:37,484
Look, Dad, this was a really
scary situation for all of us.
288
00:13:37,484 --> 00:13:39,778
And I hate to push you,
but can't you see
289
00:13:39,778 --> 00:13:41,905
that things have to change
with your drinking?
290
00:13:41,905 --> 00:13:43,406
You're right.
291
00:13:43,406 --> 00:13:45,909
No more tequila.
292
00:13:45,909 --> 00:13:47,410
Now that I'm white...
293
00:13:47,410 --> 00:13:49,621
[Valley Girl voice]
Rosé all day!
294
00:13:49,621 --> 00:13:51,414
Oh, my God!
295
00:13:51,414 --> 00:13:52,624
[coughs]
296
00:13:52,624 --> 00:13:56,961
♪ ♪
297
00:14:00,256 --> 00:14:01,925
[upbeat saxophone music]
298
00:14:01,925 --> 00:14:03,301
Okay, nobody likes
doing this,
299
00:14:03,301 --> 00:14:05,178
but we have no choice.
300
00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:07,138
Does everyone have
their letters ready?
301
00:14:07,138 --> 00:14:08,807
Is an intervention
really necessary?
302
00:14:08,807 --> 00:14:10,975
Can't we just find your father
a girlfriend
303
00:14:10,975 --> 00:14:13,269
and make this all her problem?
304
00:14:15,230 --> 00:14:16,856
Dad's sensitive
about his drinking.
305
00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:20,819
So let's approach him
in a calm, gentle manner.
306
00:14:21,653 --> 00:14:24,447
What the hell are you doing,
you stubborn old fool?
307
00:14:26,282 --> 00:14:27,409
Making up for lost time.
308
00:14:27,409 --> 00:14:29,369
They didn't have beer
at the hospital.
309
00:14:30,745 --> 00:14:33,998
Your drinking put you
in the hospital.
310
00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:35,792
You're in total denial,
311
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:38,294
so we're holding
an intervention.
312
00:14:39,379 --> 00:14:41,589
[clears throat]
George.
313
00:14:41,589 --> 00:14:44,342
Your drinking cost us
our marriage.
314
00:14:44,342 --> 00:14:46,094
My drinking is why we got
married in the first place--
315
00:14:46,094 --> 00:14:48,596
Stop it.
316
00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:50,348
See?
I even wrote down "stop it"
317
00:14:50,348 --> 00:14:52,392
'cause I knew you'd
say something stupid.
318
00:14:53,852 --> 00:14:57,731
For years, I wanted you
out of my life.
319
00:14:59,190 --> 00:15:01,776
But now...
320
00:15:01,776 --> 00:15:03,403
I want you to stay.
321
00:15:05,071 --> 00:15:07,282
We're a family again.
322
00:15:07,282 --> 00:15:09,826
But that can't happen
323
00:15:09,826 --> 00:15:11,578
if you keep going like this.
324
00:15:15,498 --> 00:15:18,626
George,
325
00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:20,587
mi sangre...
326
00:15:24,424 --> 00:15:26,801
We've come a long way
since you moved in,
327
00:15:26,801 --> 00:15:29,387
and I'm now closer to you
328
00:15:29,387 --> 00:15:32,849
than I am with my own father.
329
00:15:32,849 --> 00:15:36,394
And when you drink
and you make bad choices,
330
00:15:36,394 --> 00:15:38,563
it makes my blood--
331
00:15:38,563 --> 00:15:40,315
our blood...
332
00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:47,280
Boil.
333
00:15:52,994 --> 00:15:54,871
[sniffles]
334
00:15:54,871 --> 00:15:56,623
Dad,
335
00:15:56,623 --> 00:16:01,670
having you in my life
has been the greatest gift.
336
00:16:01,670 --> 00:16:06,841
And I'm so grateful that you've
done everything I've asked.
337
00:16:08,176 --> 00:16:09,386
But this is the most
important thing
338
00:16:09,386 --> 00:16:12,305
I'm ever gonna ask you to do.
339
00:16:14,808 --> 00:16:19,771
I can't stand by and watch you
drink yourself to death.
340
00:16:19,771 --> 00:16:24,275
I lost you once before,
and I can't lose you again.
341
00:16:24,275 --> 00:16:27,278
Oh, come on, Mayan.
Come on.
342
00:16:27,278 --> 00:16:29,823
You don't have to be worried.
I'm--
343
00:16:29,823 --> 00:16:32,617
I'm just a regular guy
344
00:16:32,617 --> 00:16:35,453
who enjoys a few beers.
I don't have a problem.
345
00:16:39,124 --> 00:16:40,583
Orale!
346
00:16:44,421 --> 00:16:47,173
I'm George Lopez!
347
00:16:56,850 --> 00:16:58,893
[Valley Girl voice]
Oh, my God!
348
00:17:04,399 --> 00:17:06,651
Chance, what are you doing?
349
00:17:06,651 --> 00:17:09,821
[normal voice] Practicing
for my hero presentation.
350
00:17:12,032 --> 00:17:14,367
[as George] Let me tell you
about a day in the life
351
00:17:14,367 --> 00:17:17,620
of a hero like me.
352
00:17:17,620 --> 00:17:21,833
I wake up at 7:00
and crack open a beer.
353
00:17:21,833 --> 00:17:26,629
Then I notice that I have
a cool new bruise.
354
00:17:26,629 --> 00:17:29,424
Whoa!
Where did that come from?
355
00:17:31,343 --> 00:17:34,429
And then I shrug
and go back to sleep
356
00:17:34,429 --> 00:17:37,432
because thinking is hard.
357
00:17:41,186 --> 00:17:44,272
[snoring]
358
00:17:44,272 --> 00:17:47,567
Uh-oh! It's noon.
359
00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:51,237
Time to cough in the bathroom
for ten minutes,
360
00:17:52,655 --> 00:17:56,284
then have another beer
for lunch.
361
00:17:58,703 --> 00:18:00,246
Is that really
how you see me, Gordo?
362
00:18:00,246 --> 00:18:01,706
Yeah.
363
00:18:01,706 --> 00:18:04,751
You're a cool 85-year-old
who does what he wants.
364
00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:13,218
You're my hero.
365
00:18:13,218 --> 00:18:15,136
No, I'm not, Gordo.
366
00:18:15,136 --> 00:18:17,472
A hero...
367
00:18:17,472 --> 00:18:20,892
sets a better example
for a kid.
368
00:18:20,892 --> 00:18:23,561
All right.
369
00:18:26,398 --> 00:18:28,149
But don't tell my teacher that,
370
00:18:28,149 --> 00:18:32,529
'cause I'm one gold star away
from a personal pan pizza.
371
00:18:39,119 --> 00:18:40,787
I, uh...
372
00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:45,333
I used to, uh,
373
00:18:45,333 --> 00:18:47,919
drink to forget
374
00:18:47,919 --> 00:18:50,547
'cause I was all alone.
375
00:18:50,547 --> 00:18:55,176
[choked up] I didn't know
what a family was or meant.
376
00:18:55,176 --> 00:19:01,182
And I never thought I would.
But now that I do...
377
00:19:01,182 --> 00:19:03,226
I wanna remember every moment.
378
00:19:03,226 --> 00:19:05,520
So...
379
00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:07,689
I don't want this anymore, Mayan.
380
00:19:15,155 --> 00:19:19,367
I told you this intervention
was a good idea.
381
00:19:19,367 --> 00:19:24,831
♪ ♪
382
00:19:26,833 --> 00:19:28,293
Seriously?
383
00:19:28,293 --> 00:19:30,128
Mayan, it's just root beer.
384
00:19:30,128 --> 00:19:31,755
It tastes like ass.
385
00:19:34,007 --> 00:19:37,052
But it's got
the word "beer" in it.
386
00:19:37,052 --> 00:19:39,679
Baby steps.
387
00:19:39,679 --> 00:19:42,349
I don't expect getting sober
to be easy for you.
388
00:19:42,349 --> 00:19:44,142
Yeah, Mayan,
but I gotta try--
389
00:19:44,142 --> 00:19:46,644
for you, for Chance.
390
00:19:46,644 --> 00:19:49,147
What about Quinten and Mom?
391
00:19:49,147 --> 00:19:50,815
For Churro.
392
00:19:50,815 --> 00:19:52,525
[Churro barks]
393
00:19:55,737 --> 00:19:58,782
You know, I missed ten years
of your life, Mayan.
394
00:19:58,782 --> 00:20:01,534
I'm not gonna miss
one day more.
395
00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:02,952
I love you, Dad.
396
00:20:02,952 --> 00:20:04,704
I love you too, Mayan.
397
00:20:04,704 --> 00:20:06,831
But I'm gonna need your help.
398
00:20:06,831 --> 00:20:09,834
Well, like I said
at the doctor's office,
399
00:20:09,834 --> 00:20:11,711
whatever happens,
we'll face it together.
400
00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:13,213
No, I need your help
401
00:20:13,213 --> 00:20:15,173
getting my finger out
of this root beer bottle.
402
00:20:15,173 --> 00:20:16,716
- Oh.
- It's stuck.
403
00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:18,051
- Now pull it.
- Okay.
404
00:20:18,051 --> 00:20:19,678
- Pull it, Mayan.
- Just let me--I'm twisting.
405
00:20:19,678 --> 00:20:20,720
- Lefty loosey--
- Ay!
406
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:22,097
- Okay!
- Ow!
407
00:20:22,097 --> 00:20:26,434
♪ ♪
408
00:20:27,602 --> 00:20:29,396
Hey, how did your first
AA meeting go?
409
00:20:29,396 --> 00:20:31,439
Great, they have
free coffee and donuts
410
00:20:31,439 --> 00:20:33,149
and this hot lady
that crashed her car.
411
00:20:33,149 --> 00:20:36,903
I'm gonna hit that like she hit
the side of that Walmart.
412
00:20:37,987 --> 00:20:42,117
The unsuspecting girlfriend
we've all been waiting for.
413
00:20:43,660 --> 00:20:45,745
I invited my new sponsor
to the house.
414
00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:47,497
He's gonna help keep me
on the right track.
415
00:20:47,497 --> 00:20:49,749
You're gonna love him.
His name is Calvin.
416
00:20:53,962 --> 00:20:56,214
- [speaking Spanish]
- 'Sup?
417
00:20:56,214 --> 00:20:57,716
Didn't I tell you?
418
00:20:57,716 --> 00:20:59,426
{\an8}Look, no more gin and juice
for me.
419
00:20:59,426 --> 00:21:00,635
{\an8}I'm on that California,
you know,
420
00:21:00,635 --> 00:21:02,053
{\an8}sober life now, you dig?
421
00:21:02,053 --> 00:21:03,430
{\an8}Yeah.
422
00:21:03,430 --> 00:21:04,889
{\an8}But, um, I was wondering
423
00:21:04,889 --> 00:21:07,100
{\an8}if you wanted to go
in your truck,
424
00:21:07,100 --> 00:21:08,476
{\an8}smoke a lil' weed.
425
00:21:10,562 --> 00:21:13,064
{\an8}It's perfect.
It's only 12 steps away.
426
00:21:14,858 --> 00:21:16,026
{\an8}Dad!
427
00:21:16,026 --> 00:21:17,193
{\an8}Whoa, she said it
428
00:21:17,193 --> 00:21:18,903
{\an8}just like you said
she was gonna say it!
429
00:21:18,903 --> 00:21:20,196
{\an8}both: Daaad!
430
00:21:20,196 --> 00:21:21,948
{\an8}[laughter]
431
00:21:23,658 --> 00:21:25,618
{\an8}[as George]
I can never do nothing!
432
00:21:25,618 --> 00:21:27,954
{\an8}♪ ♪