Previously on Love in Paradise.
If we're talking about moving forward,
you're gonna have black kids.
What if my little girl come home from school,
and someone told her she looked different?
You tell me to suck it up.
He needs to try to be a little bit more understanding
towards the Black experience.
I don't have any money coming in.
I don't know if this time is the trip
that I fully move here.
I have an investment into the quiet and the shy, kind of scared...
Donating to women and not stopping
is like you're almost addicted to it.
I'm not addicted.
I don't want my boyfriend to donate.
I don't know what to say. I'm trying to, like...
Oh, gosh. I don't know. I have to stop this.
When Madelein's upset with me,
she kind of shuts down.
She can ignore me.
She gets in these moods.
She's been sulking ever since I told her that
this trip is not my permanent move to Colombia.
Okay, I'm leaving.
I think I need to give Madelein her space.
So, I'm gonna go meet up with my buddy Brian for drinks.
- Papi! How's it going? - Buddy, how you doin'?
- Nice to see you. - You too, man.
- How you been? - Good. Good.
I met Brian through Madelein.
She is best friends with Brian's wife, Vale.
Brian's American, he's an entrepreneur,
so we have a lot in common.
And he's supportive of my sunglasses line
and other businesses that I'm working on.
Cheers.
I got you something.
Oh, that's the prototype of the glasses? Yeah.
I like that they have some weight to it.
You can tell it's good quality. Yeah.
So I just paid to get 300 made.
Bad news is, I paid for it with my 401K funds.
How much of your 401K did you take out for the glasses? Um...
We just spent 10,650 bucks.
Didn't talk to Madelein about it,
caused some problems today.
Why was Madelein mad?
I didn't tell her that I spent the money on the glasses,
and I didn't tell her about my job.
You know, I was scared to have those conversations
'cause I didn't know how she'd react.
But it feels like you're worried about the money more
because of what she might think.
So, do you think if you have no money
or if you're not providing that the relationship won't work?
Look, I love the girl.
Could things be better? Absolutely.
But I feel that she's not in it for the money.
I just want you to be honest with yourself.
Luke says that he doesn't think
that Madelein is in it for the money.
But I don't think he's being honest.
He's afraid to have money conversations with her.
He's afraid to admit that he no longer has his six-figure job.
So, I think he's afraid that she's gonna leave him.
He doesn't want to see the truth.
What you are explaining to me
seems like a relationship that has problems.
I'm no one to tell you
who to be with or who not to be with.
But if you're gonna get married,
you get a bulletproof prenup that protects your assets.
Have you had that conversation with her?
No.
Even though I'm cash poor right now,
I still have a lot to lose.
While Madelein lives in an apartment that I rented for us,
I own an apartment in another building.
That is an investment property.
I paid $300,000 for it, and I rent it out to tourists.
Everything that I've worked for has gone into this apartment,
and I don't wanna see that go away for nothing.
I will get a prenup before I get married.
What you're saying makes a hell of a lot of sense.
So, I think I gotta mentally collect myself
and not be a little bitch
and go have these hard conversations with Madelein.
Because of Maddie's age,
or her temper, or just how stubborn she is,
oftentimes, I'll think twice about bringing anything up
just because her first reaction
is oftentimes very explosive.
If she really loves you, she'll sign it.
Or no wedding.
Yeah.
I know I have to come clean about wanting a prenup.
I just don't know how many more truth bombs
our relationship can take.
It's your money and you've worked hard for it.
Take control of your own life and not have a 19-year-old
dictate how you spend your money and what you do.
that he never can give me clear answers.
I can't understand why he can't clearly say, "You know what?
I will stop donating for you because I love you."
You know? That's what you do.
If you love someone, you just go and sacrifice.
Where is she?
You know, I like him and it's different now,
if you start really having feelings for someone,
and then you're realizing you have this huge obstacle in front to overcome.
I think in a perfect world, she would just accept me.
"If you're honest, you're trustworthy,
and you talk to me about it, then it's fine donating."
Okay, Kyle, I'm back.
- Yeah, it was intense. - I'm sorry...
Yes, I'm sorry...
Usually, I wouldn't start crying.
I just feel like everything got too much
because I know that you're still doing the donation stuff, you know?
But now I still have these emotions for you,
so I feel like it's getting more deeper.
Yeah. I know.
It hurts that something that I love so much as sperm donation
is hurting Ani 'cause I don't wanna see her cry.
I want her to be happy,
and I am willing to make some compromises, though.
Maybe Ani gets to choose who I donate to.
There are things I am willing to compromise on.
I just feel like, completely just, giving up donating
forever would just be very difficult.
Well, I think about us and, you know, like, I wonder,
"Oh, my God. How are we going to make that work?"
I know. I know.
Oh, God, Kyle, I'm so sorry.
I don't wanna cry in front of you.
All right, now you're making me cry.
I see so much potential in Kyle
and what we could make out of this relationship.
But I have to choose.
If I continue to be with the man I love
and sacrifice my feelings and core beliefs,
or I walk out of this.
But it's a very hard decision,
if you love someone, to walk away from them.
I just don't want to get hurt
by this experience with you.
Okay.
Jackie is my friend.
This is the first time that she's seeing me as Alliya in person.
So happy you're becoming who you wanna be. I love it for you.
Shawn said that he was missing Douglas.
Like, is he still gonna love, like, Alliya?
Do you think it's really love? It's tough.
I think I am trying to make this relationship work
because I'm getting older.
But you do know if you keep spending time
with the wrong person, the right person won't come?
He has to love her. And if he's not doing that, I don't like him.
- Hey. - Oh, my God! It's so good to see you.
I missed you so much.
You look beautiful.
- I love your hair. - Really?
Shawn gave to me a lot of hair.
- Go ahead, Shawn. - It's pretty.
Jackie is my friend.
We met each other two years ago
I'm so excited to bring you to this island.
Me too-- Ah!
- Oh! - My hair.
Your hair is too big.
I'm so excited that she's here because I'm turning 25
this week, and Shawn is giving me a birthday party.
How do you deal with long hair in this boat? It's crazy.
You'll get used to it. It's a whole new world.
Jackie has been seeing me as Alliya by video call,
but this is the first time that she's seeing me as Alliya in person.
I'm feeling, like, complete and, like, amazing.
My life is getting better always.
Aw, so happy you're becoming who you wanna be.
I love it for you.
You're nice, thank you. Yeah.
When I first met Alliya, she was Douglas,
and she had a very good energy.
But you could also tell she was really, like,
sad and quiet and shy.
So, are you going to go by, like, she?
- Yeah. She and her. - And her? Yes! Okay, good.
Yeah, yeah.
Alliya seems like an entirely new person to me.
She looks happier, like, there's a different glow,
or like, energy to her, and it definitely suits her.
What about Shawn? Like, does he call you Alliya?
- Like, what is he... - He's calling me Alliya.
- Yay, okay. - Yeah.
And...
Those are, like, qualities that are easily manipulated type of qualities.
He could have a fear of you becoming
more strong and powerful and not need him at all.
Like, is he still gonna love, like, Alliya
because you're not timid and scared anymore?
I think it's a concern.
You good? Yes. Yeah.
Because I can be myself and I can be free.
- I put my jacket on because I'm feeling cold. - Yes.
But I'm afraid that Shawn will never love me
the way that he loves Douglas.
Thank you.
Oh.
So, I think you look amazing. Like, your hair looks great.
- Your makeup, your lashes, everything. - Thank you.
I love it.
But are you thinking maybe anything more permanent,
- like, surgery or... - Oh, yeah, I think so.
I think I'm gonna take off the fat off my belly and put on my butt,
and make it more round and big. Yeah, okay.
Have you told Shawn that you wanna do that?
Yeah, I told him. I mean, I think he don't like that
because I like the thin waist and, like, the curves.
So what if he says, "I don't want you to do this?"
He can say his opinion, but I need to choose that
'cause I wanna wake up every day and feel happy.
Right.
I think I came so far
that I don't wanna go back.
Yeah, 'cause you need to be happy. Yes.
My love for myself needs to be more than my love for Shawn.
Right.
I have been in Italy for a week with my boyfriend, Adriano,
and it's just been very overwhelming.
We've been arguing about religion,
where we're gonna live, threesomes.
So, I need some girl time.
Good morning.
All right, let's get it going.
- Yes, I'm excited. - Ah, I'm excited! Yes!
Southern Italy is known for its ceramics,
so I'm excited that my cousin, Tiffaney,
is meeting me to make some pottery.
Good morning. Welcome. Ciao.
Okay, do you want start with our class?
Yes. - Yes, ma'am.
Probably should have wore something a little different
'cause it looks like we're about to get dirty.
Okay. You can sit.
Put your forearms on pottery wheel.
Your weight on your forearms.
Oh, okay.
Cross your fingers in this way, thumbs toward up.
Oh, oh, I think I broke it.
The clay was, like, sitting in my hand,
and it was twirling into something that looked
very familiar.
Oh, okay.
Um, and I really didn't know what to do.
Ah! No, no. I don't know, it just...
I didn't know clay could be that...
I didn't know it could, it could be that freaky.
I don't think this is supposed to...
Squeeze it...
Oh, oh, oh.
I don't think that was right.
- Okay, push down. We need an hole in the middle. - Okay.
Oh, okay. Ah, my hair!
Why did you wanted to do this?
I don't know. I don't know. "I don't..."
It was a epic fail, and I think the lady was just like,
"You know what? Y'all suck, and get out."
That's what she wanted to say to us,
but she couldn't say that.
Oh, I think mine's broke.
Okay, this is not working out for me.
Just a moment.
Okay.
This was some freaky stuff. Mmm-hmm.
Speaking of freaks, how was Fabio?
So, we went to this pizza-making place.
We had a great time,
but then again, religion came up.
It's because you did bring up a good point.
Religion is important for me,
and it's important for my family as well.
So, I was hurt by the fact
that he couldn't understand that about me.
Mmm-hmm. And how we're gonna raise kids came up
since they are gonna be mixed race. Mmm-hmm.
So in the past,
when I told him my experiences
of being a Black woman in America,
basically he told me to suck it up.
And that hurt me.
It definitely bothered me.
I guess we can't expect everybody to respond
how we want them to in the moment.
But I just kind of feel like
he doesn't care,
'cause it also tells you how he's gonna be long term
in a relationship and in a marriage.
He has to love her, he has to wipe her tears away,
kiss her tears away.
And if he's not doing that, I don't like him.
Do you think you're just kind of liking the lust of it, the fun of it?
Or do you think it's really love?
I do believe that it's really love,
but we are in this cute little honeymoon phase.
- It is cute. - It's fun, we're enjoying each other.
But are you, though? Are you really enjoying it?
It's tough. Okay.
It's tough, but I know with tough times comes good times,
- so we'll get out of that eventually. - Mmm.
Do you feel like you have to give it a chance?
Maybe you're trying to make this relationship work
because of whatever you may be feeling?
To be honest, I think I am trying to
make this relationship work because I'm getting older.
I just turned 30, and so the thought of,
"I'm supposed to have kids, supposed to be married before 30,"
and none of those things have happened.
You do know if you keep spending time
with the wrong person, the right person won't come?
You have plenty of time in order to get married
and have kids and be all happy without the threesomes.
Without the issues of religion. Mmm-hmm.
I expected my life to look a lot different.
I wanted to have kids, get married.
And not having all that right now
does kind of mess with me a little bit.
I think I might be trying to fit Adriano in this plan that I have.
When in reality,
maybe he's not that guy for me.
I have to figure out soon
if this is worth fighting for.
I have to take everything that you just said
into consideration 'cause you are right.
A little bit, just a little bit.
Madelein has been chomping at the bit
to plan this wedding.
But I don't have the money.
Okay.
What needs to be done?
These sheets.
The bathroom.
Shortly after meeting Madelein,
I bought an investment property in Colombia.
It is a luxury apartment, and I do short term rentals for tourists.
Do you have a broom?
Okay.
I'm just gonna put this right here for now.
Maddy has barely spoken to me since yesterday
when I told her that my move to Columbia has been delayed.
Here's some disinfectant.
But today we're gonna have to work together
and get the rental property ready for its new guest.
Here, let me sweep the rest. I can sweep.
The other bed? Okay.
I have so much on my mind right now.
I keep thinking about what my friend Brian said last night.
He thinks I should get a prenup before marrying Madelein,
and protect my only asset, which is this apartment.
And I know he's right.
I need to do the fitted sheets
but I think I'm gonna need your help for it.
Okay.
But Madelein is already upset with me,
and I don't want to bring up another thing that might upset her.
For how long is this rent?
and they're gonna pay $1,900.
Okay, baby. Let's have a good day today, okay?
What do you think? Good?
Yeah.
My mom is Mexican, so for the first four years of my life
we only spoke Spanish at home.
But when I started school, we became
a strictly English speaking household, So I lost everything I knew.
But since I've been with Madelein, it's starting to come back to me.
And that's really good because Madelein's family does not speak a lick of English.
Hello!
Luke!
My grandma teach me respect. She teach me love.
Madelein has been chomping at the bit
to plan this wedding,
and I want to give her the wedding that she deserves.
But I can't afford that right now.
I don't know if Madelein really understands the gravity of my situation.
Madelein told me not to talk about money,
I don't want to talk about money,
but you're asking about a wedding, and I'm thinking about money.
Um...
Madelein's family is clearly frustrated with me.
I feel uncomfortable. I'm getting hot,
and Madelein is not helping me out.
And in my head I can't help but think this is a manipulation tactic,
for her to try and get what she wants.
But I'm not gonna budge.
We need to figure out our finances,
and I don't have the money to pay for the wedding,
so, you know, grow the [bleep] up.
I know this is what has to happen,
whether it causes me pain or not.
And I either need to get on board
or let go of both Alliya and Douglas.
Come on, party people.
Come on. Are you ready?
We're gonna lose this ball so fast.
Great shot.
That's the way. Ay!
I've been in Brazil for about a week
and Alliya and I have had some difficult conversations
about her transitioning and what it means to our relationship.
But I want to put all that aside for now
and just enjoy my time with Alliya and her friends tonight at the beach.
I've been so lucky that I have great friends.
So sit here.
It's... quite cold here.
I want Shawn to hang out with my friends today
because I want him to see how happy I am in my life.
So you grew up together? Okay. - Yeah.
Alliya, I've known her since birth, I guess. Yeah.
I just want to know, like, what she was like when she was little.
She was easygoing.
She was kind of shy and she would be really sweet and really kind.
We would pretend to be heroes.
- So, our-- - Oh, like superheroes?
I would have, like, super strength.
My sister would have the ability to fly, and Alliya wants to shine.
Oh, it's perfect.
Being here tonight, I can see
how much lighter and happier she seems now with her new life.
And I'm realizing that I don't want to be the person
that ever dims her light and her, what I think she would call, shine.
Okay.
There is so much that I want to say tonight.
"Today I want to say goodbye."
"To say goodbye to all the stigma that has been imposed on me."
"I have been learning about self-love,
acceptance, strength and the courage to show the world who I am."
"Alliya is the embodiment of all of the shine
that Douglas wanted to show."
Mmm-hmm.
I think at this moment, what I take away is that she's doing the right thing.
And that this is what has to happen,
whether it causes me pain or not.
All right, here we go. To new beginnings.
I realized that I can't see Douglas or Alliya.
I have to see the soul of the person that I fell in love with.
To Alliya. To life. Happiness.
Cheers.
This is our future.
And I either need to get on board or let go of both Alliya and Douglas.
I want to marry you, but with the financial concerns,
it brings up the prenup.
I don't want to be with person that don't trust me.
you.
I am so confused.
I don't have my job. I'm in a ton of debt,
and I feel like Madelein understands my financial situation,
but at the same time she's trying to plan this wedding.
And I think after talking with her family yesterday, she got more excited.
- Put on a choreographed dance? - Yeah.
And without talking to me first,
she made an appointment to go see a wedding venue today.
Hi, guys. Welcome to Grenade.
Nice to meet you. My name is Vivian.
Nice to meet you. I'm Luke.
Hi, nice to meet you Luke, nice to meet you.
This is a beautiful place where you can make your dream wedding come true.
So let's go and see what it is.
Cool.
This is where the ceremony is going to take place.
I like it.
You guys look really lovely there.
Yeah? You do.
Wow.
So right here, I want the DJ.
And this is the part we're going to do the dancing.
I hope you liked it.
She loves it.
Okay.
Just for the venue, it's $5,000.
Okay.
- Okay. Is there anything else that I would need to cover? - Yes.
You're gonna need flowers.
You're gonna need a DJ, a band perhaps?
Catering. You're also going to need a planner
if you want the day to go really smooth.
So how much is all of that?
So, we're probably at
somewhere $16,000 and $20,000? Yeah.
Okay. Okay.
I'm gonna let you guys think about it.
Thank you so much. Appreciate your time.
$20,000 to me right now is like...
it's pixie dust. It doesn't exist.
Madelein needs to wake up.
She really does.
You know, I want this for my wedding,
and I want to feel like a princess.
I want you to feel like a princess because you are my princess, baby,
but 15 to 20 grand, amor...
I'm just really concerned because 15 to 20 grand,
I don't have it. I can't pay for that.
Well, what I'm--
But I don't know when I'll have that money.
Yeah, because nobody knows the future.
Maybe it's an age thing, and at 19 years old,
you can't understand the gravity of my money problems.
I don't know. But this is exactly why I need a prenup.
I question her judgment. Yeah, I mean...
I... I just want us to both be on the same page.
I want to marry you. I just need to feel secure.
And with the financial concerns,
it brings up another component.
I know that I will never leave you.
But I don't know that you will never leave me.
And, like, what I'm getting at is...
The prenup. Have you ever heard of it?
So you don't feel secure about me
- or what the do you say? - Everybody does it.
For protection.
That is more like you don't trust me.
I don't want to be with person that don't trust me.
Uh, look, Brian also thinks I should--
you.
Next time on Love in Paradise...
Before coming on this trip there was a lot of uncertainties for me
about "Can I love Alliya as much as I love Douglas?"
Hey.
You look amazing.
I've... I've made the decision
and have a big, big, big surprise.
...you wouldn't have a threesome.
You're giving this pleasure so much power
that you're willing to toss me to the side.
I'm here to get a, uh, STD test.
Ani wasn't happy about me donating through sex to a woman in Australia.
What Ani doesn't know is that there's other women
I donated naturally to, recently.
One in Norway and one in the UK.
I'm getting a CI test so Ani shouldn't be worried
about the other women I'm having sex with to get pregnant.
Madelein and I got in a huge fight and we haven't talked since.
Most of the time I'm the one doing the compromising.
But this time is different. It's a non-negotiable.
So if she can't compromise, then...
we can't move forward.