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[opening theme music playing]
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♪ Kiff ♪
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♪ Kiff, Kiff ♪
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♪ Kiff, Kiff, Kiff ♪
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♪ Kiff, Kiff, Kiff, Kiff ♪
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♪ Kiff, Kiff, Kiff,
Kiff, Kiff, Kiff ♪
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♪ Kiff ♪
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♪ Kiff! ♪
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[giggles]
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[both laugh]
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{\an8}[Secretary Prince] Brought
to you by Bode's Boat Wax.
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{\an8}Make those babies shine, baby.
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{\an8}[students murmuring]
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{\an8}I bet it's a schoolwide pop quiz.
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{\an8}No, no. Principal Secretary's
probably gonna get awarded
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a plaque for Best Principal.
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Ah, good for Principal Secretary.
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[Secretary Prince] Settle down, everyone!
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Please welcome your principal,
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Principal Helen.
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Wel, wel, wel, wel... come.
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[all gasp]
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Where's Principal Secretary?
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Our beloved Principal Secretary
is on an educator's cruise,
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and he'll be gone for a week.
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And he left you in charge?
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[chortles]
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I call balderdash!
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- I also call balderdash!
- [all gasp]
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[snaps fingers]
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Hello. My name is Helen,
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and I'm auditioning for the--
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Wait, not that one! The other one!
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- From Principal Secretary.
- Uh, hi.
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[choppy] You... give the...
principal... to... Helen... please.
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[tape clicks off]
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Well, that is how P.S. talks, so...
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I feel honored to have been
trusted with this position.
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Now let's talk. Let's jam.
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She's sitting in her seat backwards
like us young people do.
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I think we all know Principal Secretary
needed this vacation.
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He works so hard for everyone.
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That is why we must all
step up. Thank you!
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Let's go, Fighting Tables!
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[cheering]
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Nope.
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You know what? Get rid of the book.
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I don't care. We don't need it.
Get rid of it!
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Math is all around us.
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We learn to learn from life.
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- [peppy music playing]
- [kid 1] Yahoo!
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We love Principal Helen!
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- [kid 2] She understands us!
- [kid 3] Whoo! Principal Helen!
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- She's a hero!
- [kid 4] I'm relating to an adult!
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[kids cheering]
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[Helen] Superintendent,
these kids need hope.
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Now send me those funds
for the Kid's Cookout,
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or I walk!
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{\an8}[sneaky music plays]
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Hey! What are you doing
over there, Principal Helen?
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It's a signup sheet for Helen's Helpers.
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If I get in over my head,
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I might call on some students to step up.
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- [Barry] Oh, we love that.
- [Kiff] That sounds perfect.
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- So what kind of things--
- [Helen on P.A.] Kiff and Barry,
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please report to Principal Helen.
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Oh, my little helpers.
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What do you need help, uh... Okay.
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I just wanted to see
if this intercom was working.
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- [intercom squeals]
- I-It is.
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[over P.A.] I think... I think
I've got the hang of it.
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[Barry] You sure you don't need any help?
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Maybe with cleaning up?
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[Kiff] A cluttered office
makes for a cluttered mind.
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That's what P.S. says.
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{\an8}Oh, you're right. It is a little messy.
How did that happen?
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Oh, don't worry. I love organizing stuff.
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How do you want us to do it,
alphabetically? By size? Color?
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You know, Kiff, as an educator,
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I know I'm supposed to be
the one teaching you.
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But I see now that it's you
who are teaching me.
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[gasps] Helen, you're an inspiration.
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The least we can do is clean up.
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We pledge ourselves to your cause.
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{\an8}[peppy music playing]
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Oh, Helper 1 and Helper 2 are here.
Have you finished all the tasks?
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Yes, ma'am. Well, this has been great,
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but I guess we should get back to class.
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Wait, wait, wait. Before you go,
just one more thing.
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Let's run lines together.
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Lines? Helen, I don't think--
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Um, Kiff, it's actually
an important exercise
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for me to be the best principal
I can be for the school.
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Kiff, you don't hate...
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[over P.A.] Table Town School, do you?
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[Kiff] What? Me? I love it.
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Let's run those lines.
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"Wow, Principal Boomswaithe.
You are amazing."
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"I feel honored to have been
trusted with this position."
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Get the chair. "Now let's talk. Let's jam.
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"As an educator, I know I'm supposed to be
the one teaching you,
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but I see now that it's you
who are teaching me."
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Wait, this sounds familiar.
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"I love all my students
here at Chilly High."
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- Chilly High?
- Who said anything about Chilly High?
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Paranoid.
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I have an appointment now. Bye.
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[suspicious notes play]
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Roy Fox, my name is Helen,
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and I'm here to audition
for Hot Principal.
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We're not holding auditions.
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We're going with an A-list celeb
for the lead role.
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Movies need to make money, honey.
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Oh. So what you're saying is...
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if I bring in the big bucks myself,
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I will be cast as Hot Principal?
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Where can I get a lot of money fast?
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Security.
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Helen was acting strange today, right?
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Yeah. Suspicious.
121
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Well, it probably
doesn't have anything to do
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with this receipt I found in her trash.
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{\an8}Wait a minute. This is the receipt
for the principal's cruise.
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Why would Helen have that?
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"Hot Principal."
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Hello. My name is Helen,
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and I'm auditioning
for the role of Hot Principal.
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- What's happening?
- As an actor,
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I go deep in the role.
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In fact, I am currently the principal
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of Table Town School,
a position I ascended to
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solely for the reason
of going full method.
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What? Helen isn't stepping up.
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She's stepping out on the red carpet.
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She tricked us!
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Just gotta figure out how to avoid
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doing any real work as principal.
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I'll just get a couple suckers to help--
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Oh, Kiff and Barry.
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Aw, Helen, that scallywag.
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Barry, why aren't you freaking out?
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Because Principal Secretary
will be back soon.
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Really, how much damage
can Helen do in a week?
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[Barry groans]
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We need P.S. back.
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[ship horn blows]
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- Thanks, gumdrops.
- No problem.
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Our boats were so beautifully waxed,
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we got here in record time, yeah.
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[calypso music playing]
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Now, we just need to find...
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[joints pop]
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[Kiff] Principal Secretary?
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Kiff and Barry, what are
you two rascals doing here?
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P.S.! We've got to talk to you urgent--
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Ha-ha! Well, my song's starting!
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Here, hold my canapé.
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[pop music playing]
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Okay. [clears throat]
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Here we go.
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♪ It's so easy
When you're out at sea ♪
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♪ To lose sight of responsibility ♪
Heh.
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♪ You may be needed
Back on land ♪
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♪ All good things
Need to come to an end ♪
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♪ But not for me! ♪
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♪ I am having so much fun ♪
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♪ I'm never going back
To where I'm from ♪
168
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♪ Oh, I am having so much fun ♪
169
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♪ I'm never goin' back ♪
170
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♪ I'm never goin' home ♪
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[playing drums]
172
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Come on now!
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[passengers cheer, whoop]
174
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- [passenger 1] Whoo!
- Whoo!
175
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- [passenger 2] Do it!
- [passenger 3] Yeah!
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- ♪ Whoa ♪
- ♪ Whoa ♪
177
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♪ We're not going back ♪
178
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♪ I am having so much fun ♪
179
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♪ I'm never going back
To where I'm from ♪
180
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♪ Oh, I am having so much fun ♪
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♪ I'm never goin' back ♪
182
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♪ I'm never goin' home ♪
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- [kiss]
- [cheering]
184
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So what did you want to tell me?
185
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Make it quick. I have a girlfriend now.
186
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Helen is selling the school!
We need your help!
187
00:08:34,764 --> 00:08:37,600
Oh, that's horrible. Good thing
it's not my problem anymore.
188
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Wha-- You're gonna come
and save the school, right?
189
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[laughs] Are you kidding?
Did you not hear the song I just sang?
190
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- [passengers] Choo-choo!
- I love being in love!
191
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[calypso music playing]
192
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[passengers cheering]
193
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[defeated music playing]
194
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[bright notes play]
195
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Helen! Before you sell,
196
00:09:00,122 --> 00:09:02,250
there's someone you need to meet.
197
00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:05,294
Yes, I am a potential buyer, and I--
198
00:09:05,294 --> 00:09:08,714
What is this? This school is
an absolute disaster!
199
00:09:08,714 --> 00:09:11,551
Shoddy craftsmanship! Weak bones!
200
00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:15,346
Dial it down. Well, guess the school
is junk, and you can't sell!
201
00:09:15,346 --> 00:09:18,599
Don't worry, kids.
I already know the school is junk,
202
00:09:18,599 --> 00:09:20,893
which is why I'm not selling it.
203
00:09:20,893 --> 00:09:22,728
[both] You're not? Hooray!
204
00:09:23,437 --> 00:09:24,564
I'm giving it away.
205
00:09:25,648 --> 00:09:27,066
And once I give you the school,
206
00:09:27,066 --> 00:09:29,860
you'll cast me as the star
in Hot Principal, right?
207
00:09:29,860 --> 00:09:32,488
No, but you will get a producer title.
208
00:09:32,488 --> 00:09:34,448
I'm playing the producer?
209
00:09:34,448 --> 00:09:36,075
[Barry groans]
210
00:09:36,075 --> 00:09:38,494
Wait, you can't do this.
Think of the children!
211
00:09:38,494 --> 00:09:40,871
Sorry, kids. Deal's too good.
212
00:09:40,871 --> 00:09:42,873
I could film Hot Principal on the cheap.
213
00:09:42,873 --> 00:09:46,794
The heroine of the story has won again!
214
00:09:46,794 --> 00:09:49,714
[dramatic music playing]
215
00:09:52,174 --> 00:09:54,594
Not on my watch.
216
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[all] Principal Secretary!
217
00:09:56,887 --> 00:09:58,139
[Principal Secretary] I'm back now,
218
00:09:58,139 --> 00:09:59,807
and I'm not going to let you
destroy the school.
219
00:09:59,807 --> 00:10:01,058
- Yay!
- Yes!
220
00:10:01,767 --> 00:10:04,186
- What was that?
- I knew you wouldn't let us down.
221
00:10:04,186 --> 00:10:07,356
But I thought you were content living life
on the sea with your dorky girlfriend.
222
00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:10,401
You know, I realized that
while the cruise was fun,
223
00:10:10,401 --> 00:10:14,905
educating you kids is my true passion.
Also, I got dumped.
224
00:10:14,905 --> 00:10:16,240
- Yay!
- We did it!
225
00:10:16,240 --> 00:10:18,326
Table Town School is my girlfriend.
226
00:10:18,326 --> 00:10:19,619
Well, it's too late.
227
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:22,246
I just signed the papers
to sell the school to Roy Fox.
228
00:10:22,246 --> 00:10:24,332
Principal Secretary, you've reminded me
229
00:10:24,332 --> 00:10:26,584
about the true meaning of my film.
230
00:10:26,584 --> 00:10:27,668
What?
231
00:10:27,668 --> 00:10:29,670
Please star in my movie.
232
00:10:29,670 --> 00:10:31,464
- What?
- There's no movie.
233
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:33,382
Everyone out! I need to organize.
234
00:10:33,382 --> 00:10:35,509
Kiff, Barry, thank you.
235
00:10:35,509 --> 00:10:38,095
I guess this whole time,
you thought you were teaching me,
236
00:10:38,095 --> 00:10:40,973
but in a way, I was teaching you.
237
00:10:42,016 --> 00:10:43,726
What? No. How would that work?
238
00:10:43,726 --> 00:10:45,811
You're a student.
I teach you. Go to class!
239
00:10:47,229 --> 00:10:49,231
Look at this place. It's a mess.
240
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:52,360
[sighs]
241
00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:53,778
[over P.A.] This is the life.
242
00:10:57,073 --> 00:10:58,908
[dramatic] Principal Secretary...
243
00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:01,911
you must play the lead in my film.
244
00:11:01,911 --> 00:11:04,997
I will do it, for the students!
245
00:11:04,997 --> 00:11:07,708
[dramatic music playing]
246
00:11:07,708 --> 00:11:10,753
I'll save the school!
247
00:11:10,753 --> 00:11:11,837
They nailed it.