Welcome to The Smallest Cog.
First impressions?
It's not having a wow factor.
The time has come, like reluctant teenagers,
we must tidy our room.
This is Field Marshall Montgomery's Rolls Royce.
What we might be invited to do some work on it.
Yeah.
The Princess Royal is very fond of that Rolls Royce.
Don't pile any more pressure on us.
RICHARD VOICEOVER: It's nearly three years
since the Smallest Cog opened its doors.
The business still owes me a fortune.
I've been hiding bank statements.
I'm basically running a social club!
So, it's time for a big shake-up.
Clock in in the morning, clock onto a job.
The dawn of a new era.
But not everyone likes change.
I'm very nervous about all of it.
This isn't going to tell me what to do!
I'll tell you that for nothing.
We make history with our most important restoration yet.
Did Montgomery or Churchill ever imagine you sitting in it?
Probably not.
The work must be completed on time.
Oh, she's eager!
Can we race into a bright new future?
With me at the wheel? Oh, oh, oh!
Past the BP garage on your left, roundabout right.
If you get to the sewage works, then you've gone too far.
Yeah. Alright, see you there, Richard.
Bye.
Um, no, I'm not talking to myself.
That's another Richard, not me, and actually, arguably a Richard
that's gonna be of a rather more value to the workshop than I am.
Uh, he's our new consultant, management consultant really,
who's coming in for a few weeks to try
and get some systems in place,
get us organised, that's what he does.
Um, for instance,
exhibit A of how not to function like a machine,
as a workshop, that BMW down there.
It came in two Christmases ago and because we haven't recorded
the hours along the way,
it's highly likely it will have cost me money once again.
Richard's gonna turn us into that well-oiled machine
and I don't know how well some of the cogs
are gonna take to this new era.
But it's gotta come, because it can't go on like this.
Richard thinks we're all lazy
and I reckon he's gonna have an eye opener.
I think this bloke's gonna turn up now and go,
do you know, these people are working their guts out?
On the other hand, we'll get sacked, won't we?
Morning, Richard.
Hi. Nice to meet you.
Efficiency I can sense it.
It starts now. This is happening.
Right, um, we'll go up to my office and we'll-we'll do all the...
we have to chat a lot, I guess.
Yeah. Right, they're in there.
I don't know why, but we'll go and begin.
What do you think they're talking about up there.
Do you think there talking about restructuring...
redundancies?
I think they'll be talking about the hospitality package
that we're gonna be offered.
There'll be a coffee machine. That'll be a big topic.
That will be at the top.
There is a first time to make a last cup of tea, isn't there?
You know what I need to do.
I mean, not to put too fine a point on it,
we need results.
Yes. Where do we start?
Um, you start looking at jobs that you've already got here
analysing what people are doing on a daily basis
and I would say we need a Dealer Management System in here.
That's the first thing.
What is a Dealer Management System?
It's a system that I've used before.
The guys can clock on
and clock off jobs automatically through
little tablets or off their phone and analyse what you thought
the job would take to compared to what it did take.
So, when we say managing, we are talking hour by hour.
Yes.
(LAUGHS) It's, um, um...
If this works, you know I'll cry, don't you?
I'll always carry packets of Kleenex.
Thank you.
The dawn of a new era for The Smallest Cog.
I care desperately and deeply about making this thing work,
and I think right now he is my best shot.
He's not all shouty, not like a sergeant major
but to hear him talking about efficiency and data,
I think my fairy godmother just arrived and he's called Richard.
OK, guys, the main purpose
I've come here is to analyse the workshops.
That's where my background is.
So, we're gonna have a Dealer Management System.
Would this be like an app on your phone or something?
Yeah.
You clock in in the morning, you clock on to a job.
Try and scrape every hour to the chargeable side.
People think restorations go wrong at the end, they don't.
They go wrong on day one.
I'm here to identify those issues, put processes in place.
Certain people will go along with it
and other people will be an obstacle.
But it's a good system
and it doesn't leave anywhere to hide.
To be honest, I like what he's saying.
I can understand the idea of better time management.
I'm a bit worried in some ways.
You gotta have a bit of banter and a bit of joviality,
you don't wanna be in a production line you know.
I'm gonna just hold back judgement until I see the results.
OK, so on this demo service record,
we've got a Jaguar ready to go.
Is that the new system going in?
She looks very worried, doesn't she?
Wiped the smile of her face a bit, didn't it?
Smile's gone, hasn't it? Yeah.
Happy Sophie's left the building!
So, this is gonna be your main screen in the system.
Is it like Big Brother,
is it like, know where you are on the tracker and...
That's the problem, isn't it? It's going to be every hour.
If they're non-productive that will show in blue,
and the yellow is idle so literally we don't know where they are.
So, that represents everything outside that window.
Exactly.
Is that thing operational now?
I don't know.
Well, if it ain't, we can sit and drink our tea for a bit.
Make the most of it. But if it is working...
If it is working, we're gonna be in trouble.
I do wonder what the cogs are going to think of this,
but this is essential data
that we're gonna need to implement
some changes around here,
and we need to do that to survive.
Come on, Robin!
Come on!
Want biscuits, don't ya? I know what you're after.
Come on, this is unbillable hours. I'll get into trouble. Quick.
Ah, knew you were there, didn't I?
Got a car coming in today, that happens regularly,
obviously, but this is our first go at looking at a job
from a more organised standpoint.
We're gonna actually go through it properly
with our new management system.
We're gonna, for the first time, I hope, assess this one properly
and be realistic.
Brian!
Ah, hi Richard. How are you? Nice to see you.
Yes, lovely. This is Anthony.
Hi. Ant.
Nice to meet you. It's a Topolino! Look at it.
I've never seen one. It's called a little mouse.
Yes, that's what Topolino means.
Yes, it does. Well, it was a nickname.
It was actually called the 500.
Topolino was what they called Mickey Mouse in Italy.
Yeah. What year's is this?
Er, 1936. That's the first year.
Yes.
'Cause this was a game changer. This was Italians saying, right?
This is a car for people.
Do you know... This is a bit of you.
This, isn't it, Rich? Bloody Hell, Brian.
What? It only just fits on your trailer!
I know. Look at it.
It's so narrow. Could have fallen through.
I know. Oh, look at it.
It is very small. Right.
Ant, come and have a look at this.
Little tiny four-cylinder engine. That's smaller than Oliver's.
Imagine how small the pistons are. They must be this big.
About the size of an aerosol cap.
Well, this puts out about 13 break horsepower.
13.
When was this last run? I really don't know.
I went to have a look at the dark. I gave the man the money.
So, why did you buy it?
Well, it was bought with my heart,
and I want to work on it with my son.
He had quite a nasty bike accident.
He was in hospital for months.
Oh, bad. Is he alright now?
Yeah. Yeah.
So, what do you want doing to it?
I would like it running. Yeah.
And the electrics sorted.
Well, we will give you an accurate idea
of what we think needs doing to get it running.
Yeah. And you can take a judgement.
OK, I'm sure you'll fall in love with it.
Hopefully not.
I'm sure you'll do it free of charge, you know.
Yeah. I don't feel that.
OK. A bit sketch this, innit?
One, two, three.
I completely identify with the way Brian
bought that little car with his heart.
But I'm not running a charity for ailing classic cars.
So, we are gonna produce a proper estimate for the job
and I'm a bit worried for Bryan because he's got a budget
of what, about three grand?
And there comes a point when the cost of restoration
way outstrips the value of the car, and even really cute classic cars
like that Fiat end up on the scrapheap.
2 Bit of a drive ahead today.
Basically, an email came in from this chap, Patrick.
He's opening a museum on the High Street in Taunton,
featuring cars, classic cars.
Not all super flash ones either, some of the cars we'll all remember.
And he dropped me a line saying would I open it?
So, I thought, yeah, I'll do it.
Then I thought hang on a minute.
I've paused our racing activities on account of the expense,
so would he like a temporary exhibit?
Patrick, we finally meet. Goodness gracious!
How are you? How are you?
I'm great, and you? I'm excited.
Um, as promised, you can have that in there while we're not racing it.
And talking about in there... Mm-hmm.
..can I go and have a look at this museum
that I'm gonna be opening.
I want to be one of the first people looking.
Yeah.
Patrick sold his first car aged 11 and went on to build up
a chain of garages and an impressive car collection.
Today he wants to use them to help revitalise the high street
of his beloved home town, Taunton.
Right, oh, straight away.
Fast Ford. Hello. Yep.
928. Yes.
Had one. Loved it. E type.
That is handsome.
And probably my all-time favourite car.
You have to love a Capri you know, it's the law.
And over here a car of immense significance to me.
OK.
I owned this car when I went for my audition for Top Gear.
It had done a million miles
and I couldn't afford to run it which they thought was amusing
because only someone who loves his cars
would peddle around in that.
This vast building was previously a department store,
so people have spent money here.
But Pat's spent 4 million on it.
So, you basically opened a gigantic fire hose of money
and just sprayed the place down with it.
I mean, you're not gonna make it back.
I know that.
But I was ill, five years ago, and I decided
that I really wanted to give something back.
So, this is driven entirely by passion?
Passion, and wanting to share.
You haven't disproved that you're nuts, though, by the way.
I'm just saying. No, I am completely, not slightly.
A lot. It's a lot.
Scary. Yeah.
It's the sort of thing we think of, but then you've actually done it.
(GROANS)
This place encapsulates
a lot of what I love about the whole car thing.
It's purely for hey look aren't these things amazing,
they've all got a story to tell, come and have a look.
Patrick, thank you for letting me have a look round today,
it's been a privilege.
Thank you, Richard.
And I'll be here in a few days' time for the grand opening.
Fantastic. Richard. I'll see you in a few days.
Thank you very much. Have a safe journey home.
So, on my to-do list is check static timing first.
Then ignition timing, basically going through everything.
Before this system
we'd just jump in and try and get it going
and we'd come across the issues
and then it would be too late really.
But now, we're actually diagnosing it all first.
Really, we should have done this from day one.
So, the old school key, a simple check.
The engine is free, that's a good start.
So, I need to log that now into my system
which is very strange for me
because I never go on my phone this much in one day.
Get this bit clean there. Pretty.
Morning, lads. Oh, morning Kamla.
How's it all going? It's alright actually.
Yeah, are you finding you're working
more efficiently now with this app
and the whole system?
I find it a bit better with having a list on our phones what to do.
Oh, that's good.
You just got to be careful that you don't make,
um, a sort of us and them situation
because if you've got the office staff...
I mean, we want to avoid that.
We don't want an us and them divide.
But who's managing them because it would be quite easy
to fall asleep in that warm office, wouldn't it?
Hello.
Kamla. Hi, Richard.
Come in. Hi R.J. Hello.
This is our big grown-up meeting. I know.
So, R.J.
um, in the first sort of short spell of time
that you've had this system up and running,
what's it revealing about their working habits?
I'm not asking you to drop them in it, I'm really not.
They haven't been managed before.
So, what's it revealing?
I've got some reports here that show where,
um, they were.
So, this is the first three days of this week.
80 hours on site.
29 hours went to production.
41 went to non-productive and nine had been idle.
So, in terms of percent efficiency, they're working at 36%.
Yes. It's not massive, is it?
No. What's the red ones?
That's just them clocked in but not clocked on to anything.
Gordon Bennett.
Nine hours over three days.
Bloody hell, I'm basically running a social club!
Yeah, I did a little calculation earlier on.
That works out to be about 46,800 pounds'
worth of lost revenue.
Oh, my god, their tea addiction is costing me 46,000 pounds a year.
That's a third of the loss from last year.
I mean, what is the solution?
We can't ban tea breaks though, can we?
Tea is bad for you. It's bad for me.
Cut the plug off the kettle. Yeah.
Yes!
Right, this is a special mission we're on today
because the pub, where my garage used to be is gonna be redeveloped.
So, you had a pub next to a workshop?
Yeah!
That would have been dangerous, wouldn't it?
It was but I've been given permission to go
and retrieve the sign.
OK.
So, I can have it in a bit of a man cave at home.
Yeah. But this will be between me and you.
Because this is what we call non billable hours.
What we, we've gone to do an estimate, right?
Yes.
Look at that there look, that's where it all was.
That's where it all happened there.
That's where it all started.
I know, I better not go down memory lane.
Let's go memory lane that way.
Onwards and upwards.
Right, Isaac.
See if you can get on top bit of the roof,
you might be able to stand on there.
Yeah, the roof's pushing in. I won't stand on that.
You'll be alright.
Yeah, I will be when I'm in A&E.
It's not live then?
Whoo!
Isaac!
Is that beer or water?
I dunno. It don't taste like beer.
Got it? I got it.
Right. What about the frame?
Yeah, we need to frame if possible. I'll chuck it back by the car.
Well, ain't that just a piece of history, eh?
Well, this is a strange feeling.
I miss the place, I'll be honest.
I was my own boss.
I could do what I wanted, when I wanted.
I didn't have to come to work and clock on a phone, did I?
Actually, um, thinking about that, Isaac, if we clock back out now,
say we doing the estimate, we're on the way back, ain't we?
Yeah. Right. There you are.
Job done.
Anthony. Are we right now in a new world?
Yeah. Strange world. Have you seen it?
No, I've see it in there but I've not seen it on the floor.
So, my to do list. Oh, my god.
General check of steering and suspension.
One hour.
Remove all wheels, check over brakes.
Estimated two hours.
And it will let Sophie know exactly how long
I've spent on each section.
What about the job, what have you learned?
It's looking very poorly at the moment.
Is it? The car, yeah.
If you put water in it, it leaks all round the head.
So, it probably wants a head gasket. Head gasket.
Yeah, the floor is not the best.
It's had a few home repairs and they're not good.
So, there could be some fabrication in there that starts to cost.
The wiring.
The fuel system's just pouring out, and this is what this is about now.
I find what I need to find and then, Richard,
there would build another report up saying to the customer,
to get it to the next stage, this is what it would cost.
It's good, isn't it?
Yeah, I'm actually enjoying it. Why didn't we do this before?
You tell me. You tell me.
Right. Well, are we doing it now.
2 My special secret storage barn.
Coming here sometimes is a bit depressing
because it's full of reminders of things
I haven't done, but today it's for a good reason.
The iconic British model maker Corgi has been in touch.
Historically, some of their best sellers
have been cars from film and TV
and now they wanna make a model of one of mine!
It's interesting, though, they didn't choose
the glamorous stuff like the Jag or the Mustang,
they chose this, an old Ford Escort.
Admittedly, it's an RS 2000, but not that many years ago
that was just a worthless piece of junk.
Now, it's a Fast Ford and it's collectable.
And a bit later on, I've got a very nice man coming over
to have a look at the car to start designing the model.
Time to wake up, Ford.
Oh, yeah. Simple and reliable.
Oh, I love this.
In actual fact, when I was a little kid,
my neighbour had one.
It was orange and it was simply the coolest thing I'd ever seen.
It had these headrests.
It's just so cool.
I will be interested to hear what he thinks of this car,
'cause we did have a few issues when we did it,
mostly because we had to rush it a bit towards the end.
Also, um, this isn't its original interior colour, it's tan.
When it left the factory, it was black.
Looks nice.
See what he says.
Mark. Hello.
How are you? Hi, Richard.
Thanks for making the trip up. Nice to see you.
No problem. You brought literature?
Of course, why wouldn't I? Here is the beast.
Right.
Before we look too closely at the car.
Mm-hmm, yep. What do we do today?
What's the process of getting from here
to the little model of it next to it?
What we've got to do is look at the car,
make sure everything's correct.
There are probably over 100 different paint
and trim combinations and the Corgi models
will be built to factory spec.
Right.
So, it's gonna be not as it is now
as it was when it was brand spankers.
Yep.
If you could imagine this car rolling off the line in 1979,
that's what we're aiming for.
Are your buyer's very critical?
Extremely critical.
Well, I know we... I changed the interior during the restoration,
what Mark's gonna tell me now is what else we got wrong!
OK, you're in charge, where do we start?
The wheels. They're replicas.
Yeah, but have you seen the price of authentic wheels for these?
It's got to be right.
What else? The lower side sills.
Yeah. You've painted them black?
Er, yeah.
On midnight blue cars, because the black
and the blue are so close they were left in body colour.
Also the satin black around the window frame here.
Again, this should be body colour. That's all got to be blue?
Yeah. Right.
Can we get more than another inch down the car
before you find another problem?
Onto the rear quarter. Oh, no we can't. OK.
RS 2000 decals on the side.
They shouldn't be there.
Well, is it an RS 2000?
The later cars didn't have the RS 2000 on the side.
It's for executive drivers.
I'm not an executive driver, am I?
Move round to the back. Oh, good. Right.
A couple of minor things.
There's only three things on it!
You've got a replica badge there for a start.
How do you know?
You can feel the ridge around the outside there.
Can I have that RS 2000 badge?
You can have, it looks a bit close to the Escort.
Is it? I'll get you the measurements.
Anything else? Number plate.
The characters on this are 50 mil wide.
Right?
It should be 57.
How far do you want this to go? Oh, all the away fella!
I'm loving it.
We could be making 5,000 models of that car.
So, we try to leave no stone unturned.
If we don't get it right, someone will tell us.
Which brings us into the elephant in the room, um, that interior.
Who orders a midnight blue car
with a black interior.
I love originality but I just think beige
would be a much nicer car.
Right, beige.
Now, when we did this car,
I knew it was supposed to be a black interior.
And I thought, you wouldn't wear like a black jacket
with a blue shirt, would you?
Oh, you are. I like it black.
You are like the strictest judge ever!
Shall I buy another car?
Oh, no! It's a very nice car.
It's gonna be a proper pain in the backside as well.
I'll admit to being a bit conflicted here.
If they make a model of it with all those things wrong,
what I thought would be a PR coup will turn into a PR disaster.
I think I know what I wanna do...
and it's going to involve my wallet...again.
Suppose we better clock on here.
What do you reckon this is non-productive?
Well, if you make me one it's productive.
Well, there's just two sweeteners in that,
I don't see much sweetness in that app.
Not liking it? Put it this way.
It's an app, innit, and I ain't 'appy!
Well, I'm not being funny, I've had this conversation before,
because when I had my other garage, the insurance man would come along
and go, "Oh, my computer says you could fit that wing in an hour."
And I used to say, "Yeah, if it's a new car."
Mmm. But old cars are old cars.
Yeah.
And all that computer jiggery pokery,
elastic trickery wasn't invented in them days.
It was craftsmanship.
And its craftsmanship takes time and skill and patience.
This BMW is quite a job.
It's months and months of work and I think everybody
is a bit frustrated with this car because they want to see it gone.
Well, I want to see it gone,
but I want to see it gone in the right way.
And today is the day it gets painted.
Now, I've watched Dad paint, could 1,000 cars.
It always amazes me because all the hard work
and the prep he puts in at the beginning
then suddenly the car is back to its former glory
because like an artist, that's his work.
It's a proper craft. I can't do it. I've tried.
I'm relieved.
The car looks lovely now.
To get from A to B has been like climbing a mountain.
But we went the extra mile, produced the goods
and that is what it's all about.
This is Taunton and it's the big day.
It's the grand opening of the Classic Car Museum.
Patrick's massive project.
Hopefully people will turn out to support it.
I am doing official duties opening it.
I'm hoping for a ribbon
and a pair of scissors if they trust me with it.
So, what's the drill today then Patrick, what happens?
What I would love to do is run round to the front with this car.
Whether you drive it or whether I drive it.
Do you want it upside down and on fire or not?
Whatever you want to do. I'll let you drive it.
Welcome, everyone. It's good to see you all.
We were expecting a big crowd, but not this big.
A bit spluttery.
Uh, oh!
Oh, sugar!
(RICHARD LAUGHS) We really wanted that, didn't we?
I need you to make some space
because Richard Hammond is coming round about now.
Right, what we've done is break down on the way
to the grand opening of the classic car museum.
In a classic car ironically.
(APPLAUSE)
Hello, how you doing?
OK everybody,
if we could just let them through please.
Morning, very nice to see you.
The theme of this museum I found particularly,
um, relevant right now
because these aren't necessarily the cars
that we had on our poster wall, some of them are the cars
that took us to school, that we learned to drive in.
But we should all acknowledge
and salute one particular individual,
a massive round of applause for Pat.
Well, done sir. (APPLAUSE)
It's done!
The museum is open!
I'm really pleased for Patrick that such a crowd turned out
to see his museum opening, and that a museum like that
can be on a high street where the cars are seen.
You cutting that ribbon today, I'll always remember it.
Well, I'm going back to my work then.
I'm really pleased for you that you got it done.
I'll see you again, I will be back, got to collect that one day,
and I might lend you another car to put in there as well.
Thank you, Richard.
2 The owner of that little Fiat Topolino
is coming in this morning.
We've produced one of our new forensic reports on the car.
I don't think he's gonna like it.
This is a long list.
Um, his budget of three grand, I'd say, isn't gonna cover this,
it's gonna cost a lot more than that.
Which means that little car may be about to leave us.
Indeed, it may be about to depart this earth.
So, Brian's on his way. Yeah.
This isn't like a good one, is it?
No.
He bought this with his heart.
Desperately wanted it, but it's gonna cost...
That's the problem.
..more than it's worth. Yeah, yeah.
Here he is now. Hello, Brian.
Hello Brian. Morning everybody.
Hello, mate. Come on in.
How are you?
I'm very well thanks. Nice to see you. Do come on in.
Well, we have as ordered been through it.
So, um, I think what I'm gonna do is give you this.
Yeah.
To look at because what that is, is a menu of what you can be doing
and what we can do.
I'm guessing, for us to take on all of that work and just do it,
it just wouldn't be economical for you.
No.
What I'd like to do is, if I sit down
and read this and get some idea of cost...
Yep.
..then I can pick really what I want off there for you to do
and pay for it accordingly.
This is what I love hearing.
You could have been coming in thinking,
oh, maybe it's perfect.
And they're going to say 20 quid and we'll fix it.
No, I'm a realist.
Yeah, my kind of customer.
Yeah, he's good, isn't he?
That was exactly what the new system is about.
It's not all about just straight efficiencies
and keeping things ordered as we go along
and making sure we're doing the right thing.
It's actually what we just saw.
This is working.
That's actually a result.
Because I actually thought Brian was going to come in
and say, that's it, I'll take my car away,
but actually, we still got work out of it.
So, first thing on my list for this is actually stripping the engine,
well, probably get the engine out 'cause it's so small.
This is actually quite an exciting one to do.
I've been looking forward to today
'cause I'm going to visit a model factory,
specifically Corgi.
I'm going to meet Mark who is overseeing
the model that Corgi are making of my Ford RS 2000,
and I've got to go and see it 'cause if they make it
with the black interior it should have,
I would then have to restore the car's interior
to black to match the model of the car.
Hello. Richard, morning.
Nice to see you mate. How are you?
I'm quite excited.
Well, welcome to the Wonder Works, our brand-new visitor centre.
We've been open a few months now.
Looking around at the familiar brands and logos,
I realise how embedded into my youth they are.
We try to make it the best toy shop you
could ever get access to.
Yeah, take me out of here quickly.
Here's our latest exhibit. Oh, my word.
That's fabulous.
Ultimately, this is where your RS 2000 will end up
when we do a launch of the model.
So, how big is the model of my car going to be?
So, it's gonna be the same scale as that.
Right. And so we are designing today.
Pretty much.
So, welcome to our workshop. Well, you'll remember Mark.
I do. Hello, Mark. How are you?
Hi Richard, good to see you again.
Nice to see mate, nice to see you.
You well?
Polished my anorak, and ready to go.
Excellent! Best anorak on.
Have fun. We shall. Yes.
Oh, this is your workstation.
This is where we'll working today. Right?
And today we will be creating a scale model of your RS 2000.
So, just as in the full-size car industry we are prototyping.
Exactly. Yeah.
This one here's been primed.
While the next one. That is the base coat Blue.
From the base coat it's lacquered. Right.
Now, the one thing on this model
that is not in dispute is the colour.
Accuracy is the key. OK.
So, we have these trays full of little tiny bits and pieces
that make up the final model.
We're coming to decision point, aren't we?
We are, yes.
This is the bit that we discussed at my house.
It is yes.
Interior first of all. Mm-hmm.
The car left the factory with black interior.
I then had the car trimmed but I went for this.
Yeah.
Because I thought it livened up the blue.
It's not original.
Can I just clip that in and see what it looks like?
I know there's glass to go in.
If I do that it looks a bit more moody,
doesn't it, with the black in it.
Yeah.
But my car doesn't look like that and this is a model of my car.
It is. I'll re-trim the interior.
OK.
The next decision is the wheels.
Yes,
we have a set of the 6x13 RS 4 spokes.
Those are the ones I've actually got on it.
You got the replicas.
Yeah, I know. These are the 7x13.
Will I get original ones second-hand?
If you're lucky. They're very, very desirable.
Oh, god, I'm such a child.
I'm gonna do it with the black interior
and I'm gonna find some of those chunky alloys
and put them on mine so it looks like that.
Yeah, definitely.
Full respect to Mark for his model making skills.
Only slight concern, I'm gonna have to spend,
well, a lot of money making my car look exactly
like the model made to look exactly like my car.
It's very me.
Is it today? Please tell me it's today.
Is it today? It is today.
It's done. It's going. It's actually leaving.
Look at it now look at it. Look, be honest.
It's... It's beautiful.
Yes. It-it has come a long, long way.
Are you pleased? I'm very pleased with it.
You know, it's had a lot of work and I mean, a lot of work.
It hasn't happened overnight.
When did it come in? I made this plaque.
Look there.
Nearly two years. Yes. Very nearly.
Richard, can we just agree when this leaves here now
through that door.
Yes.
It's the last job that unfolds the way this one did.
Yeah, hopefully.
Right. You are going home.
What are you doing?
Well, it's momentous. Come on.
It's going to keep making my life worse right to the end, isn't it?
Yes, gone! Out of here!
Goodbye!
Yeah! Gone!
Now, go home. Damn you!
So, you open the door, how tall's Richard?
About there I reckon. Yes.
Perfect. He'll never forget her now!
Hey Anthony.
Come and look at this.
Quick. What?
Look at this look. Look at that.
Yeah? That is Winston Churchill.
Why are you looking at pictures of Winston Churchill?
Look what they're getting into.
That's that Rolls Royce.
What, the one you've been looking at?
That's the one we went to look at. That's the actual car.
Look at the registration number. Oh, wow.
It's is a very, very important piece of history.
Princess Ann uses that car.
Does she? It's used by the King.
It was used be Eisenhower. Montgomery and Churchill.
We actually got the job then or what?
Well, I don't know.
We put a good case but I ain't heard no more about it.
Shouldn't you be chasing this up?
If we're too late on something like that,
we'll miss it, it'll be gone and we'll miss out on...
That-that car there mate is a job of a lifetime.
Go and ask him.
Hello. Hello.
Any news on the Rolls Royce yet?
Well, no, it's the MOD, they do bureaucracy.
It takes a while.
Can you ring 'em? What now?
Well, yeah. He's a Brigadier.
Don't ask, don't get.
Right. Have a seat. I'll do it. No time like the present.
He's probably doing something like Brigadier'ish.
I just don't want to lose it. I think it's a really good job.
Brigadier Caldicott, good afternoon.
Brigadier. Richard Hammond, Smallest Cog.
What can I do for you, Richard?
Um, just keen to know any news on the Rolls-Royce?
Well, the trustees, they have not yet approved
that we are gonna go ahead with the work,
but they are at least convinced that you should produce
an estimate of the works you will need to do,
and of course, for you to do that.
I need to get the car to you.
OK, so I won't get over overexcited but we are in consideration for it.
Yes, you are.
Brigadier, thank you very much indeed.
You're very welcome. Catch up with you soon, Richard.
Catch up soon. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.
That's good.
So, this estimate needs to be a proper, grown-up estimate.
Not one where, funnily enough, it ends up taking twice as long.
'Cause already there's only about two months
to those D-day celebrations and it would have to be gone then.
It's a big job, a complicated job.
And we are not gonna have long.
2 I'm gonna struggle to justify this one as not a skive,
but I'm gonna try.
I'm going to Goodwood, er, Motor racing circuit.
Patrick Blakely Edwards,
my new mate is having a test day there.
And, well, I'm the boss, so I should be able to go
and do some fun stuff with my motoring mates.
The motorsport season starts in just a few weeks,
so this is the chance for racing outfits like Patrick's
to fine tune their machinery... and blow off the cobwebs.
Obviously Richard is and will always be hugely passionate
about motorcars, so I'd quite like to make sure that he knows that,
that passion's still there.
What's great is to be here on a day like this
and to see actually see Patrick at work.
He's got a massive truck over there
and a rack of very special racing cars.
Can I hear the wheels spinning?
Yeah, it's pretty greasy out there.
It is, isn't it? Yeah.
He's not actually gung-ho out there is it.
I suppose you can't be. No.
So, he'll be putting it through its paces,
but nowhere near the edge.
Oh, here he comes.
Oh, we're getting a bit. Oh, very out of shape.
That looked like fun?
I love this car.
It looked lively.
I haven't driven it for years.
I saw you coming out of the chicane
in all manner of shapes and attitudes.
Look, the real pleasure in running a business
like this is being able to go and drive these cars around.
So, why don't you have a go with this with no pressure,
er, and do some skids.
I go out there in it?
If you're up for it?
(LAUGHS)
Are you aware of my reputation and record?
It only goes as fast as you're willing to press
that pedal on the right.
Even on a track like this, in conditions like this,
it really is safe.
Trying to think of the last time I drove at Goodwood
and, um, I've never driven at Goodwood,
I've never been round it.
I do know it's a very, very fast track.
Yeah.
Richard, come into my changing room.
Thank you. Overalls... Ah.
These...
Are they ripe? Wow!
Oh, come on!
They did about two hours around Silverstone
about two weeks ago but it's all I've got.
Right, these are going to be long on me.
Get this.
Oh. Why would you even do that?
Right, I'll put my lovely clean feet in those.
I shall emerge looking like the stale-ish racing
driver ever seen.
Excellent.
Well, this wasn't the plan, I was quite happy
watching other people try not to crash expensive things.
Here goes nothing.
This is a proper race car, isn't it?
Well, it's a gnarly old thing. Ignition.
Ooh! Sounds angry, doesn't it?
Do not crash Patrick's lovely rare car.
I'd feel bad. I would feel bad.
Marshall.
Right, we're away.
God, it's slippery as hell.
Squeeze the breaks, it's wet, Richard.
It really is!
Ooh-ooooh!
It's got a very naughty rear end this old car.
Constantly balanced on the edge of disaster.
I'm gonna brake early here because I'm scared.
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, I missed this nonsense!
I'm driving Goodwood!
Why have I stopped myself from doing it?
This is what I've got to do.
The Smallest Cog racing team is rising again
but with one serious change.
I want to do some driving.
It's not broken.
Ohhh! How did you get on?
It doesn't really want to stay on the tarmac, does it?
No, not on these tyres.
Obviously, I really hate it when somebody else's right,
but he was.
I've got to remind myself of-of why I'm doing all of this.
I'm not by nature a spectator.
Team Cog Racing might be about to gain another driver.
Short, quite old, very unreliable
and brings a terrible reputation.
It's exactly what I would employ.
If Richard does well,
I'm hoping it'll give him
a bit more enthusiasm to get back
into the driving seat of the garage.
They're convinced I'm gonna crash it.
He's actually not bad, is he?
Good to see you again.
The numbers on here are not entirely small.
I think this is slightly more than we're wanting to spend.
I think they call these estimates, 'eye watering'.
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