1 00:00:10,043 --> 00:00:13,584 ‎(勃勒美发店 营业中) 2 00:00:13,668 --> 00:00:15,834 ‎准备好去旅行了吗 苏珊? 3 00:00:15,918 --> 00:00:17,209 ‎非常期待! 4 00:00:17,293 --> 00:00:20,876 ‎第一次回到不受苏联控制的克拉科夫 5 00:00:20,959 --> 00:00:23,709 ‎我的朋友杰克·克什明斯基 ‎刚刚去过波兰 6 00:00:23,793 --> 00:00:25,001 ‎你认识他吧? 7 00:00:25,084 --> 00:00:27,418 ‎黛安 不是所有波兰人都相互认识 8 00:00:27,501 --> 00:00:29,876 ‎不 我们都认识 ‎我认识杰克 他是个好人 9 00:00:29,959 --> 00:00:31,876 ‎好了 这是我的客人名单 10 00:00:31,959 --> 00:00:33,376 ‎好好帮他们理发 11 00:00:33,459 --> 00:00:35,709 ‎凭什么她的客人全都给你? 12 00:00:39,168 --> 00:00:41,834 ‎真的假的?这还用问吗? 13 00:00:41,918 --> 00:00:45,501 ‎亲爱的 这只是因为我更靠谱 14 00:00:45,584 --> 00:00:46,459 ‎无意冒犯 15 00:00:46,543 --> 00:00:47,418 ‎冒犯! 16 00:00:47,501 --> 00:00:50,418 ‎我很靠谱 而且工作出色 17 00:00:58,126 --> 00:00:59,751 ‎好吧 你说得有道理 18 00:01:00,668 --> 00:01:01,918 ‎我的优步到了! 19 00:01:02,001 --> 00:01:03,209 ‎那是优步? 20 00:01:03,293 --> 00:01:07,084 ‎没错 他是我的朋友 ‎优步·科沃尔斯基 我来了! 21 00:01:07,168 --> 00:01:10,501 ‎再见 苏珊!祝你玩得开心! 22 00:01:12,209 --> 00:01:13,751 ‎我也想去度假 23 00:01:13,834 --> 00:01:15,501 ‎你一天到晚都在度假 24 00:01:15,584 --> 00:01:17,251 ‎把滑石粉清理干净 25 00:01:17,334 --> 00:01:19,293 ‎不许用鼻子 26 00:01:19,376 --> 00:01:21,001 ‎我只干过一次! 27 00:01:21,501 --> 00:01:23,501 ‎(瑞格利球场 芝加哥小熊队主场) 28 00:01:24,584 --> 00:01:29,251 ‎片名:风城酷阿姨 29 00:01:29,334 --> 00:01:32,209 ‎过来 你这根又粗又硬的小混蛋 30 00:01:33,001 --> 00:01:33,834 ‎逮到你了! 31 00:01:33,918 --> 00:01:35,876 ‎黛安 请过来一下 32 00:01:35,959 --> 00:01:38,168 ‎他说“请” 33 00:01:38,251 --> 00:01:39,501 ‎你要倒霉了! 34 00:01:40,668 --> 00:01:43,834 ‎好吧 被你发现了 ‎我的消毒剂瓶子里装的是蓝橙酒 35 00:01:43,918 --> 00:01:45,876 ‎是我一直用微波炉热鱼 36 00:01:45,959 --> 00:01:48,501 ‎-我不会用收银机… ‎-别说了!够了! 37 00:01:48,584 --> 00:01:50,876 ‎听着 我有个提议… 38 00:01:50,959 --> 00:01:53,126 ‎我接受 一晚上 一百万美元 39 00:01:53,209 --> 00:01:54,918 ‎你想做什么都可以 40 00:01:55,001 --> 00:01:56,293 ‎我绝不多问 41 00:01:56,376 --> 00:01:58,626 ‎等我说完了 你可以把胶带撕掉 42 00:01:58,709 --> 00:02:01,293 ‎还记得圣诞节你送我的乳霜吗? 43 00:02:01,376 --> 00:02:04,418 ‎我每天都在用 我必须夸夸你 44 00:02:04,501 --> 00:02:05,584 ‎效果非常好 45 00:02:05,668 --> 00:02:06,959 ‎我觉得会很畅销 46 00:02:07,043 --> 00:02:08,584 ‎我相信… 47 00:02:09,709 --> 00:02:12,876 ‎你和我…老天 这是真的吗? 48 00:02:13,459 --> 00:02:14,918 ‎…应该一起做生意 49 00:02:15,001 --> 00:02:16,918 ‎你他妈的在开玩笑吗? 50 00:02:17,001 --> 00:02:18,084 ‎撕掉胶带 51 00:02:19,543 --> 00:02:20,959 ‎又拔掉一根! 52 00:02:21,043 --> 00:02:23,418 ‎吉迪恩 我加入 宝贝! 53 00:02:23,501 --> 00:02:25,626 ‎我们先做一批试试看 54 00:02:25,709 --> 00:02:27,834 ‎我们可以在这里卖 20瓶怎么样? 55 00:02:27,918 --> 00:02:28,793 ‎20瓶… 56 00:02:28,876 --> 00:02:31,793 ‎让我想想 ‎小熊队的主场比赛持续到周五 57 00:02:31,876 --> 00:02:35,126 ‎冥河翻唱乐队下周 ‎在重炮手酒吧演出… 58 00:02:35,209 --> 00:02:38,043 ‎我最快能在第三季度交货 59 00:02:38,126 --> 00:02:40,418 ‎好吧 我就知道行不通 太不靠谱了 60 00:02:40,501 --> 00:02:43,126 ‎不 我很靠谱的!我可以的! 61 00:02:43,209 --> 00:02:45,293 ‎我明天就能做好! 62 00:02:45,376 --> 00:02:47,501 ‎请不要让我后悔 63 00:02:47,584 --> 00:02:48,793 ‎我会的! 64 00:02:48,876 --> 00:02:51,376 ‎我是说 我会好好干的 65 00:02:51,876 --> 00:02:53,543 ‎(创意果汁 开放(思想)) 66 00:02:53,626 --> 00:02:54,834 ‎(来尝尝我们的女神果汁) 67 00:02:56,043 --> 00:02:58,043 ‎嘿 那是我以前的美术老师 68 00:02:58,126 --> 00:02:59,126 ‎是的 69 00:02:59,209 --> 00:03:02,001 ‎创意果汁相信 支持本地艺术家 70 00:03:02,084 --> 00:03:04,626 ‎对于改善我们的社区至关重要 71 00:03:05,209 --> 00:03:06,709 ‎还有一大笔税费减免 72 00:03:07,501 --> 00:03:09,543 ‎嘿 塞缪尔 不知道你是否还记得我… 73 00:03:09,626 --> 00:03:11,876 ‎当然记得!丹尼尔 对吧? 74 00:03:11,959 --> 00:03:14,126 ‎年轻艺术家的旅程还顺利吧? 75 00:03:14,209 --> 00:03:16,293 ‎很顺利!我是说 跟艺术关系不大 76 00:03:16,376 --> 00:03:18,959 ‎不过我们经常在家听“旅程”乐队的歌 77 00:03:19,043 --> 00:03:20,334 ‎这幅画多少钱? 78 00:03:21,001 --> 00:03:22,293 ‎你很有眼光 79 00:03:22,376 --> 00:03:23,709 ‎这是一幅油画 80 00:03:23,793 --> 00:03:26,293 ‎是为了回应气候危机而创作的 81 00:03:26,376 --> 00:03:28,251 ‎售价250美元 82 00:03:28,334 --> 00:03:30,043 ‎我出十块钱 83 00:03:30,834 --> 00:03:34,376 ‎好吧 看你这么喜欢这幅画 ‎就卖给你吧 84 00:03:35,709 --> 00:03:38,834 ‎信用卡要加收一美元的手续费 85 00:03:38,918 --> 00:03:39,918 ‎算了 86 00:03:41,126 --> 00:03:44,001 ‎嘿 让那家伙去死吧 ‎反正他也不懂欣赏 87 00:03:44,084 --> 00:03:45,626 ‎没关系 丹尼尔 88 00:03:45,709 --> 00:03:48,668 ‎每幅画最终都会找到自己的归宿 89 00:03:48,751 --> 00:03:52,251 ‎再说 今天我还有 ‎大把机会卖掉一幅画 90 00:04:00,834 --> 00:04:02,459 ‎污渍洗掉了 91 00:04:03,834 --> 00:04:05,626 ‎祝你今天工作顺利 亲爱的 92 00:04:05,709 --> 00:04:06,668 ‎你也是 93 00:04:08,543 --> 00:04:10,251 ‎吉尔·格里尔森 94 00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:14,376 ‎马克 我帮你洗内裤时 ‎意识到一个问题 95 00:04:14,459 --> 00:04:16,668 ‎我知道 我缺水 96 00:04:16,751 --> 00:04:18,709 ‎不 我想找份工作 97 00:04:18,793 --> 00:04:21,793 ‎丹尼尔搬出去了 ‎我们也不再要孩子了 我想找点事做 98 00:04:21,876 --> 00:04:22,959 ‎让人激动吧? 99 00:04:23,043 --> 00:04:25,709 ‎是的!我是说 ‎你这个想法是从哪儿来的? 100 00:04:25,793 --> 00:04:29,334 ‎街对面的吉尔· 格里尔森 ‎生了三个孩子 然后又回去工作 101 00:04:29,418 --> 00:04:33,293 ‎现在成了室内蹦床公园的副总裁 102 00:04:33,376 --> 00:04:36,251 ‎-我有什么理由不行呢? ‎-你想去蹦床公园上班? 103 00:04:36,334 --> 00:04:40,084 ‎不 我会干老本行 ‎活动策划 记得吗? 104 00:04:40,168 --> 00:04:43,376 ‎杰瑞米·皮文的40岁生日派对 ‎就是我策划的 105 00:04:43,459 --> 00:04:45,001 ‎没错 但那是20年前的事了 106 00:04:45,084 --> 00:04:47,293 ‎邦妮 不要觉得你必须去工作 107 00:04:47,376 --> 00:04:50,001 ‎我赚的钱很多 ‎足够我们两个用了 宝贝 108 00:04:50,084 --> 00:04:51,793 ‎这不是重点 109 00:04:51,876 --> 00:04:53,293 ‎我需要一个目标 马克 110 00:04:53,376 --> 00:04:56,668 ‎除了搓你的黄色内裤 ‎我还需要干点别的 111 00:04:56,751 --> 00:04:58,751 ‎好吧 两件事 112 00:04:58,834 --> 00:05:02,126 ‎第一 我会多喝水 第二… 113 00:05:02,209 --> 00:05:03,793 ‎想做就去做吧 114 00:05:05,584 --> 00:05:07,168 ‎这太令人激动了! 115 00:05:07,251 --> 00:05:10,043 ‎过来 用你干巴巴的嘴唇吻我 116 00:05:10,668 --> 00:05:14,876 ‎(创意果汁) 117 00:05:14,959 --> 00:05:16,251 ‎过来 118 00:05:16,334 --> 00:05:17,668 ‎你好 又见面了 119 00:05:17,751 --> 00:05:22,209 ‎嘿…如果可以的话 我想捡这些易拉瓶 120 00:05:22,293 --> 00:05:23,168 ‎酷! 121 00:05:23,251 --> 00:05:25,918 ‎你在创作混合材料作品吗? 122 00:05:26,001 --> 00:05:27,918 ‎是的…没错 123 00:05:28,001 --> 00:05:30,959 ‎真是寻找灵感的好方法! 124 00:05:31,043 --> 00:05:34,668 ‎我想请你吃顿午餐 向你讨教一二 125 00:05:34,751 --> 00:05:38,376 ‎别说“讨教一二”这种套话 很恶心! 126 00:05:39,334 --> 00:05:40,626 ‎对不起 127 00:05:40,709 --> 00:05:41,959 ‎听着 实际情况是 128 00:05:42,043 --> 00:05:45,418 ‎我捡易拉瓶赚的钱 ‎比我卖画赚的钱还要多 129 00:05:46,001 --> 00:05:49,209 ‎艺术就是扯淡 好吗?全都是骗人的 130 00:05:49,293 --> 00:05:52,709 ‎什么?但你一辈子都在搞艺术啊 131 00:05:52,793 --> 00:05:55,251 ‎没错 看看我!成了垃圾佬 132 00:05:55,334 --> 00:05:56,459 ‎想听听我的忠告吗? 133 00:05:56,543 --> 00:05:58,293 ‎艺术家分两类 134 00:05:58,376 --> 00:05:59,543 ‎一类赚钱 135 00:05:59,626 --> 00:06:03,334 ‎另一类被车厘子味 ‎健怡可乐罐划伤手指 136 00:06:03,418 --> 00:06:04,918 ‎搞清楚你属于那一类 137 00:06:05,001 --> 00:06:06,001 ‎怎么才能搞清楚呢? 138 00:06:06,084 --> 00:06:08,001 ‎我不知道…创作一些作品 139 00:06:08,084 --> 00:06:09,459 ‎看看是否有反响 140 00:06:09,543 --> 00:06:11,876 ‎要是没有 就赶紧转行 141 00:06:12,876 --> 00:06:14,626 ‎还给我!那是我的! 142 00:06:21,209 --> 00:06:22,709 ‎丹尼尔!帮个忙 143 00:06:25,626 --> 00:06:28,251 ‎我跟你说过 ‎做辣椒乳酪酱时要穿裤子! 144 00:06:28,334 --> 00:06:30,126 ‎这关系到健康和安全 145 00:06:30,209 --> 00:06:33,751 ‎不是乳酪酱! ‎我答应了吉迪恩 要做20瓶乳霜 146 00:06:33,834 --> 00:06:36,584 ‎绝对不能搞砸 ‎因为大家都觉得我不靠谱 147 00:06:36,668 --> 00:06:40,126 ‎帮我拿着这个糖果袋 ‎我把热乳霜倒进去 148 00:06:40,209 --> 00:06:43,584 ‎等等 我从果汁店拿了很多 ‎小玻璃瓶回来 用那个吧 149 00:06:43,668 --> 00:06:46,293 ‎好主意!这叫团队合作 150 00:06:46,376 --> 00:06:48,668 ‎这么稀 正常吗? 151 00:06:48,751 --> 00:06:50,959 ‎完了!肯定是比例弄错了 152 00:06:51,043 --> 00:06:53,709 ‎需要再加点牛油 我的秘密配料 153 00:06:53,793 --> 00:06:55,793 ‎糟了 用完了! 154 00:06:55,876 --> 00:06:57,709 ‎-我们怎么办? ‎-我不知道! 155 00:06:57,793 --> 00:07:00,959 ‎大半夜买不到牛油 156 00:07:01,043 --> 00:07:02,001 ‎即使是芝加哥 157 00:07:02,751 --> 00:07:04,626 ‎-尤里卡! ‎-什么? 158 00:07:04,709 --> 00:07:06,834 ‎街上的尤里卡餐厅! 159 00:07:06,918 --> 00:07:07,876 ‎对哦! 160 00:07:07,959 --> 00:07:09,668 ‎肉卷奶昔的故乡 161 00:07:09,751 --> 00:07:11,251 ‎(尤里卡餐厅 营业中) 162 00:07:11,834 --> 00:07:13,126 ‎来妈妈这里 163 00:07:17,751 --> 00:07:19,751 ‎(护手霜) 164 00:07:20,334 --> 00:07:22,668 ‎祝你使用愉快 别忘了告诉你的朋友 165 00:07:25,084 --> 00:07:26,834 ‎-黛安! ‎-我醒着呢! 166 00:07:26,918 --> 00:07:28,168 ‎不 你睡着了 167 00:07:28,251 --> 00:07:31,251 ‎不过今天你赚了钱 ‎有资格在椅子上打盹 168 00:07:31,334 --> 00:07:33,793 ‎不得不说 你让我刮目相看! 169 00:07:33,876 --> 00:07:35,418 ‎你居然真的交货了 170 00:07:36,001 --> 00:07:39,126 ‎是啊 本来秘密配料用完了 ‎我还挺担心的 171 00:07:39,209 --> 00:07:43,126 ‎不过好在我从一家餐厅 ‎搞到了一些牛油 172 00:07:43,209 --> 00:07:46,668 ‎黛安 别告诉任何人我们使用牛油 173 00:07:46,751 --> 00:07:49,168 ‎在乳霜行业 我们称之为“脂油” 174 00:07:49,251 --> 00:07:51,084 ‎这批货一天就卖光了 175 00:07:51,168 --> 00:07:53,084 ‎你能再做五十瓶吗? 176 00:07:53,168 --> 00:07:54,209 ‎五十? 177 00:07:54,293 --> 00:07:56,543 ‎现在我有了无限量的牛油… 178 00:07:56,626 --> 00:07:58,501 ‎-脂油 ‎-做一百瓶都没问题! 179 00:07:58,584 --> 00:08:00,084 ‎来吧 搭档 180 00:08:00,668 --> 00:08:02,668 ‎别用沾满牛油的手碰我! 181 00:08:05,543 --> 00:08:07,959 ‎当她唱出不插电版本的 ‎《骄傲的玛丽》时 182 00:08:08,043 --> 00:08:09,168 ‎所有椅子都转了过来 183 00:08:09,251 --> 00:08:11,376 ‎她选了布雷克·谢尔顿 ‎我能理解 因为她的嗓音 184 00:08:11,459 --> 00:08:13,126 ‎但如果我是她 我… 185 00:08:13,209 --> 00:08:15,626 ‎证券交易委员会突袭!快跑! 186 00:08:16,418 --> 00:08:18,209 ‎-什么? ‎-别关电梯门! 187 00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:23,043 ‎请腾空这里! 188 00:08:23,126 --> 00:08:24,834 ‎那我的工作怎么办? 189 00:08:24,918 --> 00:08:28,501 ‎结束了! ‎这家公司破产了!不存在了! 190 00:08:29,209 --> 00:08:30,834 ‎牛油 有钱赚 191 00:08:35,751 --> 00:08:36,668 ‎你们好 192 00:08:36,751 --> 00:08:39,209 ‎可以上车聊聊吗? 193 00:08:39,293 --> 00:08:40,709 ‎抱歉 两位 我有严格的规矩 194 00:08:40,793 --> 00:08:43,334 ‎“绝不跟穿运动服的家伙上车” 195 00:08:43,418 --> 00:08:45,793 ‎我上过九次当 真丢脸 196 00:08:45,876 --> 00:08:48,959 ‎好吧 让我们帮你 197 00:08:54,626 --> 00:08:56,043 ‎太棒了!两升的瓶子! 198 00:08:57,168 --> 00:08:59,209 ‎好吧 如果你们是警察 就告诉我 199 00:08:59,293 --> 00:09:00,501 ‎我们不是警察 200 00:09:00,584 --> 00:09:03,751 ‎我叫斯坦尼斯拉斯 那家餐厅是我的 201 00:09:04,418 --> 00:09:06,459 ‎你偷我们的垃圾干什么? 202 00:09:06,543 --> 00:09:10,376 ‎我和我的老板吉迪恩 ‎开了一家小小的乳霜公司 203 00:09:10,459 --> 00:09:12,793 ‎秘密配料就是牛油 204 00:09:12,876 --> 00:09:15,168 ‎这么说 你开了一家公司 205 00:09:15,251 --> 00:09:16,959 ‎我有好消息要告诉你 206 00:09:17,043 --> 00:09:19,376 ‎我们的牛油全归你了 207 00:09:19,459 --> 00:09:21,168 ‎尽管拿去 208 00:09:21,251 --> 00:09:22,876 ‎真的吗?谢谢 斯坦! 209 00:09:22,959 --> 00:09:24,584 ‎我可以叫你“斯坦”吗? 210 00:09:24,668 --> 00:09:28,626 ‎不可以 不过你得让我们尝点甜头 211 00:09:28,709 --> 00:09:30,751 ‎乳霜吗?没问题 212 00:09:30,834 --> 00:09:33,459 ‎没有蛋黄酱时 ‎它是非常不错的替代品 213 00:09:33,543 --> 00:09:37,584 ‎不 你得分我们一点乳霜公司的收益 214 00:09:37,668 --> 00:09:40,168 ‎哦!这我就不确定了 215 00:09:40,251 --> 00:09:43,126 ‎我们得征求吉迪恩同意 他… 216 00:09:43,209 --> 00:09:46,334 ‎行了 就这么定了 合伙人 217 00:09:49,709 --> 00:09:51,626 ‎你最好洗洗 218 00:09:53,334 --> 00:09:55,751 ‎把这些该死的热狗从柜台上拿走 219 00:09:55,834 --> 00:09:59,584 ‎不然我就用它们抽你的蠢脸! 220 00:10:00,126 --> 00:10:01,459 ‎真好笑! 221 00:10:01,543 --> 00:10:02,626 ‎嘿! 222 00:10:02,709 --> 00:10:04,709 ‎丹尼尔 你怎么来了? 223 00:10:04,793 --> 00:10:08,376 ‎我在Instagram上看到 ‎你要在维纳尔斯小吃店卖画 224 00:10:08,459 --> 00:10:10,751 ‎感谢你关注我的账号 有两个人了 225 00:10:10,834 --> 00:10:12,168 ‎你拿的什么? 226 00:10:12,251 --> 00:10:15,376 ‎你让我陷入了存在危机 227 00:10:15,459 --> 00:10:16,751 ‎所以我画了一张画 228 00:10:16,834 --> 00:10:18,334 ‎我想让你帮我看看 229 00:10:18,418 --> 00:10:21,209 ‎我要你直言不讳 好吗? 230 00:10:24,043 --> 00:10:27,584 ‎放弃希望吧 ‎你做艺术家一毛钱都赚不到 231 00:10:27,668 --> 00:10:28,668 ‎干点别的吧 232 00:10:28,751 --> 00:10:30,834 ‎去赌马 学习编程! 233 00:10:30,918 --> 00:10:34,584 ‎行了 知道了 ‎老天 过于直言不讳了! 234 00:10:38,459 --> 00:10:40,501 ‎算在你头上!给我擦干净! 235 00:10:42,668 --> 00:10:45,001 ‎看到了吧?这就是你要避免的 236 00:10:45,501 --> 00:10:47,959 ‎我没时间跟你耗!你想点什么? 237 00:10:49,251 --> 00:10:54,001 ‎2001年 我离开 ‎“我们来开派对活动策划”公司之后 238 00:10:54,084 --> 00:10:58,709 ‎我找到了一个新客户 ‎只为他工作 一干就是18年 239 00:10:58,793 --> 00:11:02,668 ‎我策划一切 从舞蹈到音乐剧首演 240 00:11:02,751 --> 00:11:04,001 ‎到返校集会 241 00:11:04,084 --> 00:11:08,084 ‎告诉你吧 这个客户非常挑剔 242 00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:10,043 ‎他就是我的儿子 243 00:11:10,751 --> 00:11:14,209 ‎我们想找一个 ‎社交媒体工作经验更为丰富的人 244 00:11:14,293 --> 00:11:16,501 ‎我们想聘请一位新鲜面孔 245 00:11:16,584 --> 00:11:18,376 ‎你不太符合我们的招聘方向… 246 00:11:18,459 --> 00:11:21,084 ‎我们想找一个拥有更多宝贵经验的人 247 00:11:26,001 --> 00:11:27,584 ‎祝你使用愉快 248 00:11:28,293 --> 00:11:30,126 ‎阿吉 又快卖光了! 249 00:11:30,209 --> 00:11:31,709 ‎太好了! 250 00:11:31,793 --> 00:11:35,334 ‎现在我来说说什么不够好 ‎就是你选的这个标签 251 00:11:36,126 --> 00:11:38,126 ‎对…我瞎选的 252 00:11:38,209 --> 00:11:41,293 ‎看到它 我巴不得自己瞎掉 253 00:11:41,376 --> 00:11:42,709 ‎必须换一个 254 00:11:43,334 --> 00:11:45,043 ‎吉迪恩的又一个好点子 255 00:11:45,126 --> 00:11:47,751 ‎我觉得我们可以叫这款乳霜… 256 00:11:47,834 --> 00:11:49,334 ‎凝结 257 00:11:49,418 --> 00:11:53,168 ‎我喜欢!就叫凝结 天才 258 00:11:53,251 --> 00:11:55,001 ‎你怎么这么客套? 259 00:11:55,084 --> 00:11:56,876 ‎看样子你没喝醉啊 260 00:11:56,959 --> 00:11:59,043 ‎我说了 我是个负责任… 261 00:11:59,751 --> 00:12:01,459 ‎合伙人! 262 00:12:01,543 --> 00:12:03,084 ‎抱歉 有什么事吗? 263 00:12:03,168 --> 00:12:05,043 ‎斯坦尼斯拉斯 264 00:12:05,126 --> 00:12:09,751 ‎黛安拿我的牛油做乳霜 ‎所以我们是合伙人了 对吗? 265 00:12:10,834 --> 00:12:13,459 ‎我很确定我跟你说过 吉迪恩 266 00:12:13,543 --> 00:12:16,626 ‎哇 你还真是从来不听女人说什么 267 00:12:16,709 --> 00:12:20,876 ‎你绝对没跟我说过 ‎你这个颠倒黑白的疯子 268 00:12:20,959 --> 00:12:23,918 ‎合伙人 别吵架 269 00:12:24,001 --> 00:12:26,501 ‎我们今天卖了多少瓶? 270 00:12:26,584 --> 00:12:27,584 ‎-零 ‎-五十瓶 271 00:12:28,084 --> 00:12:29,959 ‎太好了 所以… 272 00:12:31,376 --> 00:12:34,126 ‎下次将销量翻倍 273 00:12:34,209 --> 00:12:36,793 ‎一百瓶 我们能做到! 274 00:12:37,418 --> 00:12:40,876 ‎一百瓶?一晚上我做不出来 275 00:12:40,959 --> 00:12:42,918 ‎妹子 你必须做出来! 276 00:13:12,543 --> 00:13:16,376 ‎丹尼尔 虽然很累人 但我们做到了 277 00:13:16,459 --> 00:13:17,876 ‎等等 那标签呢? 278 00:13:17,959 --> 00:13:19,751 ‎该死 我忘了! 279 00:13:19,834 --> 00:13:21,209 ‎等等 那是什么? 280 00:13:21,293 --> 00:13:23,084 ‎没什么 只是我画的一幅烂画 281 00:13:23,168 --> 00:13:24,376 ‎我想扔掉的 282 00:13:24,459 --> 00:13:26,709 ‎我觉得很棒 可以用它吗? 283 00:13:26,793 --> 00:13:28,376 ‎真的吗?你喜欢? 284 00:13:28,459 --> 00:13:29,918 ‎太完美了! 285 00:13:30,001 --> 00:13:33,376 ‎你觉得你能在三小时内 ‎画出一百张小标签吗? 286 00:13:34,001 --> 00:13:35,876 ‎不行 但我可以用电脑 287 00:13:35,959 --> 00:13:38,584 ‎随便你怎么弄 史蒂夫·乔布斯 288 00:13:41,626 --> 00:13:46,709 ‎我策划一切 ‎从舞蹈到音乐剧首演 到返校集会 289 00:13:47,209 --> 00:13:51,584 ‎所以我有丰富的经验 包括组织和… 290 00:13:52,126 --> 00:13:55,209 ‎不好意思 两位 我在跟你们说话呢! 291 00:13:55,293 --> 00:13:57,209 ‎头抬起来 放下手机! 292 00:13:57,293 --> 00:13:59,043 ‎好好给我听着 293 00:13:59,126 --> 00:14:01,543 ‎我在这里工作是你们的运气 294 00:14:01,626 --> 00:14:05,043 ‎没有人比一群白人女富婆更挑剔了 295 00:14:05,126 --> 00:14:07,793 ‎我为很多这样的富婆策划过派对 296 00:14:07,876 --> 00:14:10,709 ‎所以如果你们不用我 ‎那是你们的损失 297 00:14:11,626 --> 00:14:13,084 ‎等等 妈咪!我是说 邦妮! 298 00:14:13,168 --> 00:14:14,668 ‎哟 说真的 299 00:14:14,751 --> 00:14:18,501 ‎我们的活动就需要 ‎你这种女老板的劲头 300 00:14:18,584 --> 00:14:21,918 ‎没错 我仿佛能看到你 ‎告诉别人免费酒水结束了 301 00:14:22,001 --> 00:14:23,459 ‎现在只收现金 302 00:14:23,543 --> 00:14:25,751 ‎你被录用了! 303 00:14:26,751 --> 00:14:27,709 ‎哦耶! 304 00:14:31,543 --> 00:14:33,209 ‎(凝结) 305 00:14:34,043 --> 00:14:39,293 ‎我绝对地 毫不含糊地 无可置疑地… 306 00:14:39,959 --> 00:14:41,168 ‎太喜欢了! 307 00:14:41,251 --> 00:14:43,626 ‎太好了!你说真的吗? 308 00:14:43,709 --> 00:14:45,418 ‎丹尼尔 这太棒了! 309 00:14:45,501 --> 00:14:48,918 ‎既有个性 又很通用 天才! 310 00:14:49,001 --> 00:14:51,626 ‎好吧 哇!太谢谢你了 311 00:14:51,709 --> 00:14:54,459 ‎之前我的世界一片黑暗 感觉… 312 00:14:54,543 --> 00:14:56,834 ‎听着 我要收回关注点了 313 00:14:56,918 --> 00:14:59,626 ‎-收到 ‎-我向公司介绍了我们的产品 314 00:14:59,709 --> 00:15:03,418 ‎他们想订购五百瓶试卖! 315 00:15:03,501 --> 00:15:06,084 ‎天哪 G弦裤!太棒了! 316 00:15:06,168 --> 00:15:09,001 ‎我知道 太激动人心了! 317 00:15:09,084 --> 00:15:12,459 ‎好了 我们来谈谈 ‎不那么激动人心的事吧 318 00:15:13,084 --> 00:15:17,459 ‎你让我们 ‎跟东欧犯罪分子成了合伙人! 319 00:15:21,501 --> 00:15:23,543 ‎我跟其中一个人说 不要在室内抽烟 320 00:15:23,626 --> 00:15:25,084 ‎他居然亲我的嘴唇! 321 00:15:25,168 --> 00:15:28,501 ‎听着 我同意 ‎他们对我们的乳霜公司没好处 322 00:15:28,584 --> 00:15:30,584 ‎没有什么乳霜公司 323 00:15:30,668 --> 00:15:32,209 ‎我们被犯罪团伙掌控了! 324 00:15:32,293 --> 00:15:34,626 ‎别紧张 他们没有伤害任何人 325 00:15:35,168 --> 00:15:38,043 ‎嘿 那些家伙直接在抢劫客人 326 00:15:38,126 --> 00:15:40,293 ‎把手伸进客人的口袋之类的 327 00:15:40,376 --> 00:15:42,251 ‎黛安 你得搞定这件事 328 00:15:42,334 --> 00:15:45,001 ‎马上让他们走人! 329 00:15:45,084 --> 00:15:48,459 ‎放心吧 合伙人 我知道该怎么说 330 00:15:50,918 --> 00:15:53,043 ‎斯坦尼斯拉斯 我们需要谈谈 331 00:15:53,126 --> 00:15:54,043 ‎没错 332 00:15:54,126 --> 00:15:57,751 ‎你得开通电视频道《终极波兰》 333 00:15:57,834 --> 00:15:59,126 ‎我跟吉迪恩商量了 334 00:15:59,209 --> 00:16:01,834 ‎我们决定跟你分道扬镳 335 00:16:01,918 --> 00:16:05,168 ‎分道扬镳?那你上哪儿去搞牛油? 336 00:16:05,251 --> 00:16:07,209 ‎这东西可不容易买到 337 00:16:07,793 --> 00:16:09,251 ‎我们会有办法的 338 00:16:09,334 --> 00:16:12,501 ‎不过我想谢谢你的帮助 请你走吧 339 00:16:14,834 --> 00:16:16,459 ‎我不吃这一套 340 00:16:16,543 --> 00:16:19,084 ‎任何决定都要所有合伙人同意才行 341 00:16:19,168 --> 00:16:20,709 ‎我不同意 342 00:16:21,376 --> 00:16:24,584 ‎所以你不再是合伙人了 所以… 343 00:16:24,668 --> 00:16:26,084 ‎我们握手约定了的 344 00:16:26,168 --> 00:16:28,626 ‎尼古拉亲眼所见 他是公证人 345 00:16:28,709 --> 00:16:30,501 ‎我都看到了 有法律效力 346 00:16:30,584 --> 00:16:32,709 ‎要我说 我仍是合伙人 347 00:16:33,418 --> 00:16:34,418 ‎否则… 348 00:16:35,209 --> 00:16:36,293 ‎那是一把梳子 349 00:16:36,376 --> 00:16:38,084 ‎用梳子更疼 350 00:16:38,168 --> 00:16:39,668 ‎协议仍然有效 351 00:16:40,751 --> 00:16:44,668 ‎聊得很开心 ‎很高兴我们解决了这个问题 352 00:16:45,918 --> 00:16:49,043 ‎我开始觉得这些人是大麻烦了 353 00:16:51,834 --> 00:16:53,501 ‎好 我们这么办 354 00:16:53,584 --> 00:16:57,209 ‎我们请他们喝咖啡 ‎然后把糖包换成毒药 355 00:16:57,293 --> 00:16:59,709 ‎-那是《绝命毒师》的剧情 ‎-我不会把这个写下来 356 00:17:00,459 --> 00:17:03,084 ‎那就让他们坐飞机 ‎然后坠毁在一座小岛上 357 00:17:03,168 --> 00:17:06,376 ‎那样他们就能活下来 但其实是炼狱 358 00:17:06,459 --> 00:17:09,043 ‎别再剽窃电视剧的剧情了 359 00:17:09,126 --> 00:17:12,084 ‎怎么了?电视剧 ‎帮我摆脱过很多次麻烦 360 00:17:12,168 --> 00:17:14,793 ‎我靠剽窃《辩护律师》的剧情 ‎逃过了两次醉驾处罚 361 00:17:14,876 --> 00:17:16,793 ‎还边看《辩护律师》边自慰 362 00:17:16,876 --> 00:17:20,543 ‎等等 对了!《辩护律师》! ‎我们得采取法律手段 363 00:17:20,626 --> 00:17:23,543 ‎如果我们能证明所有权 ‎就可以威胁起诉他们! 364 00:17:23,626 --> 00:17:26,793 ‎没错!我们需要一名专利律师 365 00:17:26,876 --> 00:17:29,001 ‎上哪儿去找专利律师? 366 00:17:29,501 --> 00:17:32,543 ‎你不是跟一个专利律师交往过吗? ‎就在最近? 367 00:17:32,626 --> 00:17:34,709 ‎对哦!斯图尔特! 368 00:17:35,751 --> 00:17:38,751 ‎不管怎样 我们的麻烦大概就是这样 369 00:17:39,334 --> 00:17:41,001 ‎老天 你真帅 伙计 370 00:17:41,084 --> 00:17:43,793 ‎-我是怎么想的? ‎-专心点 该死! 371 00:17:43,876 --> 00:17:45,418 ‎好了 你怎么看? 372 00:17:45,501 --> 00:17:49,126 ‎听起来你们需要申请禁令 ‎以便保护你们的产品 373 00:17:49,209 --> 00:17:50,751 ‎太好了!这样能行吗? 374 00:17:50,834 --> 00:17:53,668 ‎如果他们不同意靠边站 ‎那就跟他们法庭上见 375 00:17:53,751 --> 00:17:56,418 ‎法律上我们赢定了 ‎就像灌篮一样轻松 376 00:17:56,501 --> 00:17:58,584 ‎太棒了!空心篮! 377 00:17:58,668 --> 00:18:01,876 ‎瞧 我就说这些家伙 ‎不是我的好伙计斯图尔特的对手吧 378 00:18:01,959 --> 00:18:03,376 ‎谢谢 黛安 379 00:18:03,459 --> 00:18:05,751 ‎好奇地问一下 对方是谁? 380 00:18:05,834 --> 00:18:07,709 ‎是一群波兰黑帮 381 00:18:09,084 --> 00:18:12,293 ‎最好别开这种玩笑 ‎那帮人出了名的凶残 382 00:18:12,376 --> 00:18:14,126 ‎总之 我会把文件准备好的 383 00:18:16,959 --> 00:18:20,084 ‎好吧 你是说我的退休金账户… 384 00:18:20,168 --> 00:18:22,418 ‎归零了 385 00:18:22,501 --> 00:18:23,751 ‎天啊! 386 00:18:23,834 --> 00:18:27,459 ‎所以退休金没了 ‎我的积蓄全都买了公司股票 387 00:18:27,543 --> 00:18:29,043 ‎我该怎么办? 388 00:18:29,126 --> 00:18:30,543 ‎马克 好消息! 389 00:18:30,626 --> 00:18:31,709 ‎我得到那份工作了! 390 00:18:33,626 --> 00:18:35,334 ‎马克 你在哭 391 00:18:36,126 --> 00:18:40,918 ‎我只是…替你开心 仅此而已 392 00:18:41,001 --> 00:18:42,168 ‎我好激动! 393 00:18:42,251 --> 00:18:43,376 ‎虽然薪水不高 394 00:18:43,459 --> 00:18:46,084 ‎但这是我这些年来 ‎第一次感觉活过来了! 395 00:18:46,168 --> 00:18:47,959 ‎太棒了! 396 00:18:48,043 --> 00:18:49,959 ‎对了 薪水到底是多少 397 00:18:50,043 --> 00:18:52,543 ‎别担心 马克 养家糊口还是靠你 398 00:18:52,626 --> 00:18:53,793 ‎我比你差远了 399 00:18:55,043 --> 00:18:56,459 ‎很好 那就好 400 00:18:56,543 --> 00:18:58,418 ‎我去买一条铅笔裙! 401 00:19:02,001 --> 00:19:04,501 ‎收拾东西 伙计们 闹剧结束了! 402 00:19:05,084 --> 00:19:06,876 ‎你这是什么意思? 403 00:19:06,959 --> 00:19:10,418 ‎斯坦 我们有个小东西叫做“专梨” 404 00:19:10,501 --> 00:19:12,543 ‎是“专利”!老天! 405 00:19:12,626 --> 00:19:16,043 ‎这是给我们的禁令 406 00:19:16,126 --> 00:19:19,751 ‎上了法庭 它的效力 ‎高于任何握手约定 407 00:19:19,834 --> 00:19:21,584 ‎能让我看看吗? 408 00:19:25,209 --> 00:19:28,668 ‎我的天!那是过了塑的! 409 00:19:31,001 --> 00:19:33,876 ‎我们哪儿也不去! 410 00:19:35,209 --> 00:19:36,918 ‎我回来了! 411 00:19:38,001 --> 00:19:39,418 ‎斯坦尼斯拉斯? 412 00:19:39,501 --> 00:19:40,834 ‎苏珊娜姑妈? 413 00:19:40,918 --> 00:19:42,168 ‎你认识他? 414 00:19:42,251 --> 00:19:43,209 ‎他是我侄儿 415 00:19:43,293 --> 00:19:46,418 ‎老天!他们还真是相互认识! 416 00:19:46,501 --> 00:19:48,209 ‎我希望你们能合得来 417 00:19:48,293 --> 00:19:51,959 ‎因为显然 ‎他是我和吉迪恩的新合伙人! 418 00:20:11,709 --> 00:20:13,793 ‎对不起 419 00:20:20,459 --> 00:20:21,918 ‎我去 苏珊娜! 420 00:20:22,001 --> 00:20:25,459 ‎对啊!真的有必要 ‎把那些饺子全都送给他吗? 421 00:20:25,543 --> 00:20:28,501 ‎谢谢你 苏珊娜 谢谢你的保护 422 00:20:28,584 --> 00:20:31,209 ‎看来黛安又解决了一个麻烦 423 00:20:31,293 --> 00:20:33,418 ‎什么?你什么都没做 424 00:20:33,501 --> 00:20:36,918 ‎没错 而且我们 ‎还要想办法完成公司的订单 425 00:20:37,001 --> 00:20:38,626 ‎我们怎么办? 426 00:20:38,709 --> 00:20:41,334 ‎现在没有人提供牛油了 427 00:20:41,418 --> 00:20:43,626 ‎不好意思 我得让脚消肿 428 00:20:43,709 --> 00:20:45,543 ‎肿得像香肠一样 429 00:20:45,626 --> 00:20:47,626 ‎长途飞行 在维也纳中转 430 00:20:47,709 --> 00:20:49,668 ‎坐我旁边的男人拉肚子 431 00:20:49,751 --> 00:20:50,959 ‎等一下 432 00:20:51,043 --> 00:20:55,251 ‎维也纳 香肠 拉肚子! 433 00:20:55,334 --> 00:20:56,918 ‎我有办法了! 434 00:20:57,501 --> 00:21:00,418 ‎第一天表现很好 邦妮!你很出色! 435 00:21:00,501 --> 00:21:04,626 ‎这场狗狗婚礼 ‎一定能挣脱锁链 无比精彩 436 00:21:04,709 --> 00:21:06,376 ‎应该是“挣脱狗绳” 437 00:21:06,459 --> 00:21:08,001 ‎对! 438 00:21:08,084 --> 00:21:10,168 ‎我的优步到了 再见! 439 00:21:13,293 --> 00:21:14,751 ‎需要喝水吗? 440 00:21:14,834 --> 00:21:16,834 ‎不用了 谢谢 我…马克? 441 00:21:16,918 --> 00:21:18,126 ‎邦妮? 442 00:21:19,626 --> 00:21:22,376 ‎我瞒着你 你完全有理由生我的气 443 00:21:22,459 --> 00:21:24,418 ‎我只是不想让你看不起我 444 00:21:24,501 --> 00:21:26,251 ‎我没有生气 亲爱的 445 00:21:26,334 --> 00:21:28,668 ‎现在我们都在重新开始 446 00:21:28,751 --> 00:21:30,709 ‎我们一起面对 447 00:21:31,501 --> 00:21:33,251 ‎我们是一个团队 448 00:21:33,751 --> 00:21:34,751 ‎我们是一个团队 449 00:21:36,293 --> 00:21:37,376 ‎你要进来吗? 450 00:21:37,459 --> 00:21:39,959 ‎我要去机场接人 就在… 451 00:21:40,834 --> 00:21:42,209 ‎印第安纳州曼斯特? 452 00:21:42,293 --> 00:21:43,751 ‎拜托! 453 00:21:45,043 --> 00:21:47,293 ‎甜椒好吃多了! 454 00:21:47,376 --> 00:21:49,459 ‎没门!全天供应辣椒! 455 00:21:52,751 --> 00:21:57,459 ‎各位!我们不能每天争论这个! 456 00:21:58,501 --> 00:22:01,501 ‎女士们先生们 ‎可以占用你们一点时间吗? 457 00:22:01,584 --> 00:22:02,793 ‎叫保安! 458 00:22:02,876 --> 00:22:04,959 ‎等等!我们需要你们的牛油 459 00:22:05,043 --> 00:22:08,876 ‎你们花高价请人丢掉的牛油 460 00:22:08,959 --> 00:22:11,751 ‎我们免费接手 461 00:22:11,834 --> 00:22:15,084 ‎用沃伦·巴菲特的话来说 ‎这叫“互惠互利” 462 00:22:15,168 --> 00:22:18,834 ‎用吉米·巴菲特的话来说 ‎“你是怎么到后台的?” 463 00:22:18,918 --> 00:22:21,793 ‎怎么样 各位?成交吗? 464 00:22:25,168 --> 00:22:28,168 ‎谢谢你买下这幅画 ‎这是我这些年卖掉的第一幅画 465 00:22:28,251 --> 00:22:30,001 ‎我很高兴它找到归宿了 466 00:22:30,084 --> 00:22:33,876 ‎我要好好享受一下 ‎把自来水重新开通 467 00:22:34,709 --> 00:22:36,918 ‎塞缪尔该洗澡了! 468 00:22:37,751 --> 00:22:39,668 ‎黛安 我第一次见到你 就有一种预感 469 00:22:39,751 --> 00:22:42,584 ‎总有一天 我们将一起 ‎把装在冷藏箱里的牛油 470 00:22:42,668 --> 00:22:44,751 ‎搬到你乱糟糟的公寓里 471 00:22:44,834 --> 00:22:45,834 ‎真的吗? 472 00:22:46,459 --> 00:22:49,501 ‎假的!但很奇怪 ‎我很高兴我们在搬牛油 473 00:22:49,584 --> 00:22:52,459 ‎不搞艺术了 我们来搞乳霜吧! 474 00:22:52,543 --> 00:22:54,959 ‎好 我来换上工作服 475 00:22:56,418 --> 00:22:59,668 ‎天啊 那不是侧开裤! 476 00:22:59,751 --> 00:23:02,251 ‎我好像拉到胯了 477 00:23:33,709 --> 00:23:38,709 ‎字幕翻译:刘波