1
00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:03,396
今天會是史上最讚的一天

2
00:01:03,479 --> 00:01:04,605
我怎麼知道？

3
00:01:04,689 --> 00:01:06,774
因為每一天都超讚的啦

4
00:01:07,608 --> 00:01:09,443
我愛我的生活

5
00:01:09,527 --> 00:01:12,238
我愛陽光，我愛蝴蝶

6
00:01:12,363 --> 00:01:17,493
但我最愛的，是道格

7
00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:20,204
給我惦惦！

8
00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:22,498
你這隻死廢狗

9
00:01:22,582 --> 00:01:23,541
他就是道格！

10
00:01:24,083 --> 00:01:26,627
地表最棒的狗主人

11
00:01:28,796 --> 00:01:31,841
還記得我們第一次見面

12
00:01:31,924 --> 00:01:34,093
她也太哈你了吧

13
00:01:34,177 --> 00:01:35,428
{\an8}（狗狗領養）

14
00:01:35,511 --> 00:01:37,054
嘿，狗狗！

15
00:01:37,138 --> 00:01:41,350
眼神交會那一刻，就知道我們天生一對

16
00:01:41,434 --> 00:01:43,144
靠北

17
00:01:43,519 --> 00:01:46,314
從那天起，我們倆就形影不離

18
00:01:47,356 --> 00:01:49,108
道格到底哪裡好？

19
00:01:49,192 --> 00:01:51,152
該從哪說起咧？ -閃啦

20
00:01:51,235 --> 00:01:54,780
他超愛黏著我，愛到連工作都沒有

21
00:01:56,324 --> 00:01:58,951
道格也不會買無聊狗玩具給我

22
00:01:59,035 --> 00:02:00,953
他讓我自己發揮創意

23
00:02:01,037 --> 00:02:02,455
嗨，雷吉，那是什麼啊？

24
00:02:02,538 --> 00:02:03,581
比如這咬不爛的玩意

25
00:02:04,665 --> 00:02:06,375
搞屁喔！

26
00:02:06,959 --> 00:02:08,085
那不是我的

27
00:02:08,169 --> 00:02:09,711
聽我解釋

28
00:02:09,794 --> 00:02:11,714
那是我要送妳的聖誕禮物

29
00:02:11,797 --> 00:02:13,132
現在是7月

30
00:02:13,216 --> 00:02:16,260
有時我擔心道格跟我在一起不開心

31
00:02:16,344 --> 00:02:17,678
妳誤會了 -分了吧，雷吉來

32
00:02:17,762 --> 00:02:20,139
後來我發現他真的很愛我

33
00:02:20,223 --> 00:02:22,892
幹嘛？你又不愛狗

34
00:02:22,975 --> 00:02:24,393
我愛這隻狗

35
00:02:24,477 --> 00:02:26,020
我超開心的

36
00:02:27,355 --> 00:02:31,484
重點是妳愛牠，看妳得不到牠我就爽

37
00:02:31,567 --> 00:02:33,861
你這個變態死遜咖

38
00:02:33,945 --> 00:02:35,988
妳的愛狗在遜咖手上咧

39
00:02:36,948 --> 00:02:41,536
說真的，這世上唯一比我更得寵的

40
00:02:41,619 --> 00:02:44,789
是他最愛的玩具：他的雞雞

41
00:02:44,872 --> 00:02:48,543
他幫雞雞剪頭髮，陪雞雞看電視

42
00:02:48,626 --> 00:02:49,460
轉過來！

43
00:02:49,544 --> 00:02:51,337
看屁喔，沒fu了啦

44
00:02:51,420 --> 00:02:55,591
看他撸雞雞的樣子，真希望自己是雞雞

45
00:02:55,675 --> 00:02:58,886
可是每次我想一起玩，他都不讓我玩

46
00:02:58,970 --> 00:03:00,513
走開啦！大爛狗！

47
00:03:00,596 --> 00:03:03,641
維繫感情的關鍵是擁有共同的興趣

48
00:03:03,724 --> 00:03:05,142
我們都愛汪汪叫

49
00:03:08,437 --> 00:03:10,439
我們都愛抓抓抓

50
00:03:14,986 --> 00:03:18,823
我們可以整晚不睡覺，聊上幾小時

51
00:03:20,783 --> 00:03:23,202
我的人生都被你毀了

52
00:03:23,286 --> 00:03:24,829
雖然我聽不懂他在講啥

53
00:03:24,912 --> 00:03:28,416
要不是你這北七，她根本不會發現

54
00:03:28,499 --> 00:03:30,668
我感覺得出來他是愛我的

55
00:03:31,961 --> 00:03:33,171
{\an8}（驅逐通知）

56
00:03:33,254 --> 00:03:36,132
雖然我認識的人類不多

57
00:03:36,215 --> 00:03:38,676
{\an8}但他肯定是地表最棒的狗主人

58
00:03:38,759 --> 00:03:40,636
{\an8}媽的咧

59
00:03:41,012 --> 00:03:42,805
屁啦，媽

60
00:03:42,889 --> 00:03:45,308
妳給的支票不夠付房租，我要被趕了

61
00:03:45,391 --> 00:03:47,935
你可能覺得道格很髒亂

62
00:03:48,019 --> 00:03:49,729
我才不要搬回家住

63
00:03:49,812 --> 00:03:52,273
但他最近都有把玩具收好

64
00:03:52,356 --> 00:03:53,691
拍謝啦，聽我說

65
00:03:53,774 --> 00:03:56,402
妳也知道我不能住離學校那麼近

66
00:03:57,278 --> 00:03:58,196
（珍藏A片）

67
00:03:58,279 --> 00:03:59,780
不要！

68
00:03:59,864 --> 00:04:01,199
{\an8}（更多A片）

69
00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:07,455
爛狗！我最愛的水煙壺欸！

70
00:04:14,629 --> 00:04:16,589
你喜歡球球是吧？

71
00:04:17,673 --> 00:04:21,093
最近道格會跟我玩一個新遊戲

72
00:04:21,177 --> 00:04:22,345
叫“你丟我撿”！

73
00:04:22,428 --> 00:04:23,638
去撿

74
00:04:23,721 --> 00:04:27,016
他會把我載超遠

75
00:04:27,099 --> 00:04:29,227
莎喲娜啦，死廢狗

76
00:04:29,310 --> 00:04:32,104
把球球丟出去，自己開車回家

77
00:04:32,188 --> 00:04:35,858
我要去撿球球，自己找路回家！

78
00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:38,569
每次我把球球撿回去，他都會說

79
00:04:38,653 --> 00:04:39,904
媽的

80
00:04:39,987 --> 00:04:41,656
我就知道我贏了！

81
00:04:42,448 --> 00:04:43,533
去撿！

82
00:04:44,909 --> 00:04:47,411
我們最近狂玩這遊戲 -媽的！

83
00:04:47,495 --> 00:04:50,665
有時一天還玩個三、四次

84
00:04:50,748 --> 00:04:51,999
去撿！

85
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:53,584
媽的！

86
00:04:53,668 --> 00:04:55,419
去撿！媽的！

87
00:04:55,962 --> 00:04:58,047
媽的！媽的！

88
00:05:01,008 --> 00:05:02,343
操你媽！

89
00:05:02,426 --> 00:05:04,929
沒錯！我又贏了！

90
00:05:05,888 --> 00:05:06,722
夠了

91
00:05:08,432 --> 00:05:10,309
老子不玩了

92
00:05:13,604 --> 00:05:15,356
（再會了，奧克伍德）

93
00:05:16,649 --> 00:05:18,860
超愛坐車吹風的啦！

94
00:05:18,943 --> 00:05:22,572
可以看看外面的花花世界

95
00:05:25,908 --> 00:05:27,577
繼續衝啊，道格！

96
00:05:28,035 --> 00:05:29,996
不要放水喔

97
00:05:31,789 --> 00:05:32,748
我最愛挑戰了

98
00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:46,721
（市集）

99
00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:54,270
看來這次難度爆表

100
00:05:54,353 --> 00:05:58,065
我們從沒跑這麼遠過

101
00:05:58,149 --> 00:06:01,402
我根本不知道這裡是哪裡

102
00:06:01,485 --> 00:06:03,404
也太刺激了吧！

103
00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:10,703
這世界有時候看起來有點小可怕

104
00:06:10,786 --> 00:06:11,704
但我不怕

105
00:06:11,787 --> 00:06:12,788
去撿吧你

106
00:06:12,872 --> 00:06:15,791
因為道格永遠陪在我身邊

107
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:03,047
這次難度真的有點高

108
00:07:04,298 --> 00:07:06,759
但那是因為道格對我有信心

109
00:07:08,636 --> 00:07:13,599
俗話說的好，吵吵鬧鬧才是真感情

110
00:07:14,642 --> 00:07:15,977
你要用心付出

111
00:07:18,104 --> 00:07:19,647
你要滿懷勇氣

112
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:23,317
你要記住所謂真愛…

113
00:07:24,610 --> 00:07:26,237
沒那麼簡單

114
00:07:49,552 --> 00:07:51,345
雖然我超愛這遊戲

115
00:07:52,263 --> 00:07:54,557
但我有點不想玩了

116
00:07:54,974 --> 00:07:59,353
因為呢，人家想回家了

117
00:08:12,575 --> 00:08:14,869
好唄，動起來吧

118
00:08:15,494 --> 00:08:17,371
回家找道格去

119
00:08:22,835 --> 00:08:24,295
這地方挺不賴的

120
00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:27,590
我喜歡這些垃圾

121
00:08:27,673 --> 00:08:30,510
還有針頭，好多針頭

122
00:08:32,512 --> 00:08:35,972
北鼻，跟阿富汗獵犬交往過嗎？

123
00:08:36,057 --> 00:08:39,644
應該沒有，謝謝妳喔

124
00:08:42,313 --> 00:08:45,691
哎呀呀，哪來的小鬼？

125
00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:46,609
迷路啦？

126
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:48,694
嗨嗨，大狗狗

127
00:08:48,778 --> 00:08:50,988
對啊，我迷路了

128
00:08:51,072 --> 00:08:52,406
我想回道格家

129
00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:54,116
你們知道在哪裡嗎？

130
00:08:55,743 --> 00:08:57,745
道格家？ -對

131
00:08:57,828 --> 00:08:59,789
我知道在哪裡 -太好了

132
00:08:59,872 --> 00:09:01,832
就在我屁眼裡，靠北咧

133
00:09:02,792 --> 00:09:03,876
應該不是吧

134
00:09:05,169 --> 00:09:07,380
好喔，我要走了

135
00:09:08,130 --> 00:09:09,590
可以把球球還給我嗎？

136
00:09:09,674 --> 00:09:10,716
還球球咧？

137
00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:12,426
沒要你小命就算你走運了

138
00:09:12,510 --> 00:09:16,097
幹，是誰在林北地盤嘰嘰叫？

139
00:09:16,180 --> 00:09:17,348
你誰啊？

140
00:09:17,431 --> 00:09:20,893
媽的最好別逼我現身喔

141
00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:22,895
嚇屎你的小心肝，沒在唬爛！

142
00:09:22,979 --> 00:09:24,981
要來尬一下嗎，王八蛋？

143
00:09:25,064 --> 00:09:27,358
真要尬？沒在怕啦！

144
00:09:28,860 --> 00:09:30,653
來啊，廢渣！

145
00:09:30,736 --> 00:09:32,196
小不啦嘰的

146
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,824
看影子還以為是什麼大隻佬咧

147
00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:36,158
搞定他小意思吧

148
00:09:36,242 --> 00:09:39,495
來啊，咬我啊，臭小黑

149
00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:40,705
最好敢啦！

150
00:09:40,788 --> 00:09:42,582
知道林北身上多少病菌嗎？

151
00:09:42,665 --> 00:09:45,418
狂犬病、疥瘡，幫死松鼠舔舔會得的病

152
00:09:45,501 --> 00:09:47,253
林北通通有

153
00:09:47,336 --> 00:09:50,256
昨晚才剛爽完，夠瘋才敢嗆啦！

154
00:09:51,549 --> 00:09:53,301
垂直彈跳1公尺

155
00:09:53,384 --> 00:09:55,344
聽好了，敢過來

156
00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:57,763
小心我的小狗爪插爆你屁眼

157
00:09:57,847 --> 00:09:59,140
立馬變出沙威瑪

158
00:09:59,223 --> 00:10:00,266
這傢伙腦殘喔？ -怎樣？

159
00:10:00,349 --> 00:10:01,809
看他在那邊耍白痴

160
00:10:01,893 --> 00:10:04,937
看我的！耍白痴我超強！

161
00:10:05,021 --> 00:10:07,356
阿娘喂，這傢伙有病喔？

162
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,984
林北最愛操垃圾！

163
00:10:10,067 --> 00:10:11,569
嗨吧？我瞭

164
00:10:11,652 --> 00:10:13,154
想被回收嗎？

165
00:10:13,237 --> 00:10:16,115
誰有束口帶？袋子被我操壞了

166
00:10:16,199 --> 00:10:17,366
好來，下一個換誰？

167
00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:19,952
嘟丟笑欸，快閃 -要打要操選一個

168
00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:23,080
下好離手，反正都會長蟲蟲！

169
00:10:24,790 --> 00:10:26,209
大狗就是浩呆

170
00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:30,129
兩三下就玻璃心碎滿地

171
00:10:30,213 --> 00:10:31,255
小鬼，有沒有在聽？

172
00:10:31,339 --> 00:10:33,966
這裡不是你該來的地方，該閃了

173
00:10:34,050 --> 00:10:36,177
可是我的球球…

174
00:10:36,260 --> 00:10:38,012
管他的，再弄一顆就好啦

175
00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:44,560
我叫蟲仔，你叫什麼名字？

176
00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:47,939
抱歉，很開心認識你，蟲仔

177
00:10:48,022 --> 00:10:49,982
我叫廢渣 -蝦米？

178
00:10:50,066 --> 00:10:52,276
全名是死廢渣

179
00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:54,737
不過道格有時會叫我廢狗

180
00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:57,448
聽起來都不像名字欸

181
00:10:58,616 --> 00:11:01,661
是喔，道格的女友以前叫我雷吉

182
00:11:01,744 --> 00:11:03,913
雷吉，水啦，就叫這個

183
00:11:03,996 --> 00:11:05,122
走吧

184
00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:07,708
你當流浪狗多久了？

185
00:11:07,792 --> 00:11:09,669
我不是流浪狗

186
00:11:09,752 --> 00:11:11,879
是喔？ -我只是暫時在外面

187
00:11:11,963 --> 00:11:13,422
我有主人的

188
00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:16,175
我們在玩遊戲，他把我載超遠

189
00:11:16,259 --> 00:11:17,552
把球球丟出去 -是吼

190
00:11:17,635 --> 00:11:19,971
我要把球球撿回家

191
00:11:25,893 --> 00:11:26,811
救人喔！

192
00:11:27,270 --> 00:11:28,521
對啊

193
00:11:29,564 --> 00:11:31,899
拍謝喔，也太悲劇了吧

194
00:11:31,983 --> 00:11:35,486
好久沒聽到這麼好笑的笑話了

195
00:11:35,570 --> 00:11:37,154
很開心你覺得好笑

196
00:11:37,238 --> 00:11:38,281
聽我的沒錯

197
00:11:38,364 --> 00:11:41,742
你那個主人沒在跟你玩遊戲

198
00:11:41,826 --> 00:11:43,619
他拋棄你了啦

199
00:11:43,703 --> 00:11:46,080
你正式成為一隻流浪狗

200
00:11:46,163 --> 00:11:47,373
別叫我流浪狗

201
00:11:47,456 --> 00:11:48,875
沒什麼好丟臉的

202
00:11:48,958 --> 00:11:51,878
林北就是流浪狗，日子過得爽歪歪

203
00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:53,671
學著點，你幾歲？

204
00:11:53,754 --> 00:11:54,922
兩歲

205
00:11:55,006 --> 00:11:58,843
我三歲，林北老司機了，沒蓋你

206
00:11:58,926 --> 00:12:02,680
我看過半拉布拉多、半貴賓的混種狗

207
00:12:02,763 --> 00:12:03,890
拉布拉多貴賓！

208
00:12:03,973 --> 00:12:06,017
不對，拉多多

209
00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:07,310
拉多多 -根本科學怪犬

210
00:12:07,393 --> 00:12:09,103
嚇屎人 -真的

211
00:12:09,187 --> 00:12:13,065
重點是，自己過日子爆幹爽

212
00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:14,817
只要你懂遊戲規則

213
00:12:15,610 --> 00:12:17,111
什麼規則？

214
00:12:17,195 --> 00:12:20,448
規則一，想要什麼，尿在上面

215
00:12:20,531 --> 00:12:22,950
尿了就是你的

216
00:12:23,034 --> 00:12:25,369
來練習一下，看到那根路燈嗎？

217
00:12:25,453 --> 00:12:27,163
{\an8}有 -大尿特尿吧

218
00:12:27,622 --> 00:12:28,956
{\an8}要確定欸？

219
00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:30,708
{\an8}尿啦，根本沒人鳥你

220
00:12:30,791 --> 00:12:32,835
你現在是正港流浪狗

221
00:12:32,919 --> 00:12:36,380
{\an8}我才不是流浪狗，不過好啦

222
00:12:36,464 --> 00:12:39,425
{\an8}大恭喜，路燈是你的了

223
00:12:42,386 --> 00:12:44,096
{\an8}再來是規則二

224
00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:46,474
{\an8}想操就操，沒在怕的

225
00:12:46,557 --> 00:12:48,434
{\an8}你上過什麼東西嗎？

226
00:12:48,518 --> 00:12:50,520
{\an8}呃，應該是沒有

227
00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,563
{\an8}但我喜歡在道格的腳上跳舞

228
00:12:52,647 --> 00:12:54,315
那不叫跳舞

229
00:12:54,398 --> 00:12:57,026
你在上他的腳，惡魔之舞

230
00:12:57,109 --> 00:13:02,031
現在世界就是你小雞雞的吃到飽餐廳

231
00:13:02,114 --> 00:13:03,407
真假？ -告訴你

232
00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:04,867
我最近才操過這沙發

233
00:13:04,951 --> 00:13:05,785
不會吧！

234
00:13:06,494 --> 00:13:07,703
爽到翻過去

235
00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:10,957
是喔？ -她超夠味的

236
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:12,124
看得出來

237
00:13:12,208 --> 00:13:14,335
感覺很久沒洗香香了

238
00:13:15,044 --> 00:13:16,003
再約囉，北鼻

239
00:13:19,924 --> 00:13:21,259
幸會了

240
00:13:22,301 --> 00:13:24,595
接下來，規則三

241
00:13:24,929 --> 00:13:28,599
最重要的一條，沒有之一

242
00:13:28,683 --> 00:13:31,686
一切靠自己

243
00:13:31,769 --> 00:13:34,438
太可怕了 -不是壞事，好嗎？

244
00:13:34,522 --> 00:13:35,773
你現在可能超挫

245
00:13:35,857 --> 00:13:38,234
覺得自己不能沒有道格

246
00:13:38,317 --> 00:13:41,737
我需要他！ -相信我，你不需要

247
00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:44,490
人類最會唬爛，騙我們需要他們

248
00:13:44,574 --> 00:13:46,576
你只是被洗腦了

249
00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:49,912
你現在根本不用鳥那麼多

250
00:13:49,996 --> 00:13:51,038
你是流浪狗

251
00:13:51,122 --> 00:13:53,541
想幹嘛都可以 -人家怕怕

252
00:13:53,624 --> 00:13:57,545
跟我一起大聲說，我想幹嘛都可以

253
00:13:57,628 --> 00:14:00,298
我想幹嘛…都可以？

254
00:14:00,381 --> 00:14:01,841
他媽的一點都沒錯

255
00:14:01,924 --> 00:14:05,761
想知道人類多機歪嗎？跟我來

256
00:14:07,346 --> 00:14:10,099
看看這些小孬孬寵物狗

257
00:14:11,058 --> 00:14:15,021
不過放風15分鐘就嗨到瘋掉

258
00:14:15,646 --> 00:14:19,275
靠，我們的野狼祖先看到都要哭了

259
00:14:20,401 --> 00:14:21,944
跟我來

260
00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:24,405
話說人類幹嘛那麼愛養狗？

261
00:14:24,488 --> 00:14:25,406
因為愛？

262
00:14:25,489 --> 00:14:29,118
錯，就我的觀察，人類需要狗大便

263
00:14:29,202 --> 00:14:31,621
看那女的，看到沒？

264
00:14:31,704 --> 00:14:34,415
看吧，人類在收集狗大便

265
00:14:34,498 --> 00:14:35,708
收集狗大便要幹嘛？

266
00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:37,835
我猜是用來做巧克力

267
00:14:37,919 --> 00:14:39,212
你吃過巧克力嗎？

268
00:14:39,295 --> 00:14:40,338
沒有 -就說嘛

269
00:14:40,421 --> 00:14:42,006
來，介紹麻吉給你認識

270
00:14:42,089 --> 00:14:44,217
你不是說這些寵物狗都是小孬孬

271
00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:46,177
對啦，我超會扯

272
00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:47,887
嘿，小孬孬 -嘿，蟲仔

273
00:14:47,970 --> 00:14:50,348
那隻擋大車的小狗欸

274
00:14:50,431 --> 00:14:51,349
正是林北

275
00:14:51,432 --> 00:14:52,892
大家都知道不可能啦

276
00:14:52,975 --> 00:14:55,686
車就停在那 -是我擋下來的

277
00:14:55,770 --> 00:14:57,772
車上沒人 -就是啊

278
00:14:57,855 --> 00:14:59,815
林北沒心情練肖喂

279
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:02,109
我今天來

280
00:15:02,193 --> 00:15:04,654
是要介紹你們認識新朋友，雷吉

281
00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:05,821
他剛被主人拋棄

282
00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:07,698
哭哭，歡迎加入我們

283
00:15:07,782 --> 00:15:11,035
真是，協議分手嗎？ -玩遊戲而已

284
00:15:11,118 --> 00:15:11,953
雷吉，見過杭特

285
00:15:12,036 --> 00:15:15,498
他是治療犬，負責照顧一堆快死的人

286
00:15:15,581 --> 00:15:19,460
聽起來美麥，但他本來受訓要當警犬

287
00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:21,838
你差點進警犬隊？

288
00:15:21,921 --> 00:15:25,216
好厲害喔 -呵呵，算吧

289
00:15:25,299 --> 00:15:27,051
閃邊去啦，頭套哥

290
00:15:27,802 --> 00:15:28,803
拍謝喔，巴仔

291
00:15:28,886 --> 00:15:30,888
杭特，嗆回去啊

292
00:15:30,972 --> 00:15:32,974
好喔

293
00:15:33,057 --> 00:15:36,227
巴仔，你他媽…週末要幹嘛？

294
00:15:36,310 --> 00:15:37,812
弱爆了 -好棒棒

295
00:15:37,895 --> 00:15:39,438
操你媽啦

296
00:15:40,231 --> 00:15:43,860
是喔，是說我媽掛咧，祝好運囉

297
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:44,819
弱雞！

298
00:15:44,902 --> 00:15:46,904
好眼力，保重嘿

299
00:15:46,988 --> 00:15:48,239
杭特，硬起來 -對啊

300
00:15:48,322 --> 00:15:50,324
別讓他爬到你頭上，你這麼大一隻！

301
00:15:50,408 --> 00:15:53,619
你應該一口吞掉他，拉出來再吞掉

302
00:15:53,703 --> 00:15:55,204
蟲仔，你也知道我不喜歡起衝突

303
00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:58,332
別被大老二騙了，他就是個小孬孬

304
00:16:00,251 --> 00:16:01,586
好大一支槍

305
00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:03,838
謝啦，我很努力保養

306
00:16:03,921 --> 00:16:05,548
沒事就舔爆它

307
00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:07,425
唯一比杭特老二更有搞頭的

308
00:16:07,508 --> 00:16:09,010
只有這兩位大大的曖昧關係

309
00:16:09,093 --> 00:16:11,179
沒啦 -屁啦

310
00:16:11,262 --> 00:16:12,972
滿搞笑的 -也是啦

311
00:16:13,055 --> 00:16:15,516
“比杭特老二更有搞頭”

312
00:16:15,600 --> 00:16:16,809
沒這回事 -完全沒有

313
00:16:16,893 --> 00:16:19,937
瑪姬倒是個帥氣的臭婊子

314
00:16:20,021 --> 00:16:23,024
可惜她主人珍娜愛上別的臭婊子

315
00:16:23,107 --> 00:16:24,567
那隻傻白甜取代了她

316
00:16:24,650 --> 00:16:26,861
貝拉看著我說：我也要吃蛋糕

317
00:16:26,944 --> 00:16:28,779
我立馬奉上蛋糕

318
00:16:28,863 --> 00:16:31,199
就是為了這個 -是不是？

319
00:16:31,699 --> 00:16:34,785
珍娜要我坐下，我照做了

320
00:16:34,869 --> 00:16:37,163
然後我心想：歪頭裝無辜

321
00:16:37,246 --> 00:16:39,707
應該敲可愛的吧

322
00:16:39,790 --> 00:16:40,791
妳夠囉

323
00:16:40,875 --> 00:16:42,502
靠，誰人跟她比

324
00:16:42,585 --> 00:16:43,920
沒差啦

325
00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:45,421
貝拉年輕、可愛又好玩

326
00:16:45,505 --> 00:16:48,216
珍娜當然更寵愛她，我懂

327
00:16:48,299 --> 00:16:50,843
酷喔，我在想你們等一下…

328
00:16:50,927 --> 00:16:52,053
但我實在搞不懂

329
00:16:52,136 --> 00:16:54,764
她轉圈圈到底哪裡可愛

330
00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:57,558
我還能邊睡邊轉咧，不過真的沒差

331
00:16:57,642 --> 00:16:58,518
好喔 -說真的

332
00:16:58,601 --> 00:17:00,353
我現在已經不在乎了，我好得很

333
00:17:00,436 --> 00:17:02,772
我一點也不嫉妒、不擔心、不生氣

334
00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:04,899
不難過、不抓狂

335
00:17:04,982 --> 00:17:06,358
真的，妳好得很

336
00:17:06,442 --> 00:17:08,361
珍娜現在一天到晚找貝拉

337
00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:10,404
我剛好有機會好好愛自己

338
00:17:10,488 --> 00:17:11,739
我可以認真挖我的土

339
00:17:11,821 --> 00:17:13,574
我超愛指縫卡土的感覺

340
00:17:13,657 --> 00:17:15,910
大口呼吸新鮮空氣，與大自然融為一體

341
00:17:15,992 --> 00:17:17,703
真的，我愛挖土

342
00:17:17,787 --> 00:17:19,163
我超愛挖土！

343
00:17:19,247 --> 00:17:20,205
我愛死挖土了！

344
00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:24,710
是怎樣？ -看吧，雷吉

345
00:17:24,794 --> 00:17:26,170
知道當流浪狗多爽了吧

346
00:17:26,253 --> 00:17:28,214
不用面對那些主人的屁事

347
00:17:28,297 --> 00:17:30,633
我說了，我不是流浪狗

348
00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:31,884
道格只是在跟我玩遊戲

349
00:17:32,969 --> 00:17:34,804
今晚跟我們出來鬼混吧

350
00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:37,265
你會發現沒被拴著

351
00:17:37,348 --> 00:17:38,850
狗生會有多美好

352
00:17:38,933 --> 00:17:43,229
就算不相信我，嗨過今晚就知道了

353
00:17:43,312 --> 00:17:44,188
沒錯 -真的

354
00:17:44,272 --> 00:17:47,024
感恩，但我要趕快回去找道格

355
00:17:47,108 --> 00:17:48,359
蝦毀？為何？

356
00:17:48,442 --> 00:17:51,195
討他歡心啊，這不是狗生的意義嗎？

357
00:17:51,279 --> 00:17:53,656
聽你在供三小！

358
00:17:53,739 --> 00:17:54,574
又來了

359
00:17:54,657 --> 00:17:59,829
你活著不是為了討腦殘人類的歡心

360
00:17:59,912 --> 00:18:03,207
不是為了充實單身魯蛇的生活

361
00:18:03,291 --> 00:18:07,837
而是為了盡情幹你想幹的事

362
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:09,547
身為流浪狗…

363
00:18:09,630 --> 00:18:11,716
你他媽想幹嘛都可以

364
00:18:11,799 --> 00:18:13,467
幹嘛幫我配和音？

365
00:18:13,551 --> 00:18:14,844
你講八百萬遍了

366
00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:16,304
災啦 -我喜歡你的大道理

367
00:18:16,387 --> 00:18:17,930
版權所有 -沒關係

368
00:18:18,014 --> 00:18:18,890
瞭嗎？ -瞭

369
00:18:18,973 --> 00:18:21,851
這樣吧，再來個美食之夜？

370
00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:22,977
讚啦！ -水啦！

371
00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:25,438
好，太陽下山披薩店見

372
00:18:25,521 --> 00:18:28,274
瘋狂開趴啦

373
00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:34,614
（雞翅 披薩）

374
00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:36,657
美食之夜是什麼？

375
00:18:36,741 --> 00:18:39,702
一週當中最美妙的夜晚

376
00:18:39,785 --> 00:18:42,872
容易要到吃的，掉地上的也多

377
00:18:43,497 --> 00:18:45,875
那些掉下來的根本是寶貝

378
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:47,877
我只覺得會顧人怨

379
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:48,961
我們是在做環保欸

380
00:18:49,045 --> 00:18:50,922
人類超愛的 -對啊

381
00:18:51,005 --> 00:18:51,881
穩住

382
00:18:53,674 --> 00:18:54,800
穩住

383
00:18:54,884 --> 00:18:56,302
打翻披薩吧，賤貨

384
00:18:56,385 --> 00:18:58,054
目標出現，衝！ -快快快！

385
00:19:05,478 --> 00:19:07,146
（冰啤酒）

386
00:19:10,733 --> 00:19:12,485
這水喝了有點頭暈

387
00:19:13,194 --> 00:19:15,363
真正嗨的還在後面

388
00:19:15,446 --> 00:19:16,864
輕飄飄好蘇胡

389
00:19:16,948 --> 00:19:18,115
慢慢喝，雷吉 -哇尬意

390
00:19:29,377 --> 00:19:32,755
老查，再說最後一次，根本就沒柵欄

391
00:19:32,839 --> 00:19:34,966
{\an8}出來啦！ -我無法

392
00:19:35,049 --> 00:19:37,718
{\an8}就說了有魔法柵欄

393
00:19:37,802 --> 00:19:39,095
只是你們看不到！

394
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:40,555
衝了啦，老查！ -來嘛！

395
00:19:40,638 --> 00:19:41,472
老查…

396
00:19:41,556 --> 00:19:42,974
{\an8}（此有隱形柵欄）

397
00:19:43,057 --> 00:19:46,352
{\an8}說真的，不知道為什麼我被你們說服了

398
00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:49,897
我竟然幹這種蠢事

399
00:19:49,981 --> 00:19:51,399
少在那邊耍孬，衝了啦！

400
00:19:51,482 --> 00:19:52,483
拚了！

401
00:19:53,150 --> 00:19:54,485
衝啊！

402
00:19:54,569 --> 00:19:55,528
老查…

403
00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:58,906
你行的！老查，你行的！

404
00:20:01,701 --> 00:20:03,035
靠腰！

405
00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:05,746
是真的！魔法柵欄是真的！

406
00:20:18,843 --> 00:20:20,845
送啦，我來了

407
00:20:20,928 --> 00:20:22,597
你這個小壞壞

408
00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:24,140
小貓頭鷹壞壞

409
00:20:25,349 --> 00:20:27,768
蟲仔，你說的對，我喜歡這味

410
00:20:28,686 --> 00:20:30,104
可以跟你交換嗎？

411
00:20:30,188 --> 00:20:32,690
就跟你說美食之夜超狂的吧

412
00:20:32,773 --> 00:20:34,108
我玩得超開心der

413
00:20:34,192 --> 00:20:35,067
哪來的賤婊？

414
00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:36,736
看看這小王八蛋

415
00:20:36,819 --> 00:20:38,321
衝三小？

416
00:20:38,404 --> 00:20:41,115
林北踢爆你蛋蛋 -走了啦

417
00:20:41,199 --> 00:20:42,992
媽的死尖耳怪 -沒必要啦

418
00:20:43,075 --> 00:20:44,744
幹得好，雷吉 -我很棒嗎？

419
00:20:44,827 --> 00:20:46,913
送那小矮人上天堂

420
00:20:46,996 --> 00:20:48,664
大聲說你是他爹地

421
00:20:48,748 --> 00:20:50,750
小矮人，我是你爹地

422
00:20:50,833 --> 00:20:52,668
很開心終於見面了 -雷吉啊

423
00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:54,337
雖然情況有點怪怪的

424
00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:55,254
不是啦 -雷吉！

425
00:20:55,338 --> 00:20:57,089
來追我啊！

426
00:20:57,173 --> 00:20:59,133
追不到咧…

427
00:20:59,217 --> 00:21:01,511
那傢伙一直瞪我 -走了啦

428
00:21:01,594 --> 00:21:02,470
旁邊那個小不點

429
00:21:02,553 --> 00:21:03,638
全身捲毛的小雜種

430
00:21:03,721 --> 00:21:05,056
你說什麼？ -給他好看

431
00:21:05,139 --> 00:21:07,183
不許你這樣說我 -告訴他誰是老大

432
00:21:07,266 --> 00:21:09,060
我不想使用暴力

433
00:21:09,143 --> 00:21:10,478
我不知道我有兒子

434
00:21:10,561 --> 00:21:12,313
還是個小矮人 -雷吉啊！

435
00:21:12,396 --> 00:21:13,814
閉嘴啦！ -有人想操我兒子嗎？

436
00:21:13,898 --> 00:21:15,399
你嘛幫幫忙 -還滿帥氣的

437
00:21:15,483 --> 00:21:16,692
很會穿衣服 -也太瞎了吧

438
00:21:16,776 --> 00:21:19,362
老查，你超有種的

439
00:21:19,445 --> 00:21:21,155
還真有魔法柵欄

440
00:21:21,239 --> 00:21:22,782
就跟你說了吧！

441
00:21:22,865 --> 00:21:25,409
哪個北七發明魔法柵欄這玩意

442
00:21:25,493 --> 00:21:27,119
我想幹嘛都可以

443
00:21:27,203 --> 00:21:28,746
雷吉，別衝動 -是怎樣？

444
00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:30,748
雷吉，別幹傻事！ -雷吉，不行

445
00:21:31,332 --> 00:21:32,834
我想幹嘛都可以

446
00:21:32,917 --> 00:21:35,670
{\an8}不要挑戰黑魔法，小鬼

447
00:21:47,890 --> 00:21:50,268
水啦！ -太神奇了！

448
00:21:50,351 --> 00:21:51,269
超猛的！ -見鬼了！

449
00:21:51,352 --> 00:21:53,145
讚啦！ -不可能！

450
00:21:53,229 --> 00:21:55,314
雷吉！ -我辦到了！

451
00:21:56,566 --> 00:21:58,442
今晚超嗨的啦

452
00:21:59,527 --> 00:22:04,323
雷吉，我聞你屁眼就知道你這傢伙讚

453
00:22:04,407 --> 00:22:06,784
你超神勇 -北鼻，就說了吧

454
00:22:06,868 --> 00:22:08,870
流浪生活爽到炸掉！

455
00:22:08,953 --> 00:22:12,206
不用拴狗鍊還滿爽的吧？

456
00:22:12,290 --> 00:22:14,125
是不是？ -是滿讚的啦

457
00:22:14,208 --> 00:22:17,795
不用忍尿10小時等道格帶我去解放

458
00:22:18,796 --> 00:22:21,465
“神勇”聽起來也比“廢渣”好聽太多

459
00:22:22,049 --> 00:22:23,134
我還沒尿完

460
00:22:23,217 --> 00:22:25,261
等等，他真叫你廢渣？

461
00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:27,221
還不用再被丟車上烤狗肉

462
00:22:27,305 --> 00:22:30,308
他老愛把我丟車上，窗戶只開個小縫

463
00:22:30,391 --> 00:22:32,393
每次都害我差點沒昏死

464
00:22:32,476 --> 00:22:33,311
什麼東西？

465
00:22:33,394 --> 00:22:35,479
我只好瘋狂大喘氣

466
00:22:35,563 --> 00:22:39,358
狂撐猛撐等他45分鐘後回來

467
00:22:40,401 --> 00:22:42,236
道格就是這樣，超搞笑

468
00:22:44,030 --> 00:22:47,992
所以這傢伙當你塑膠、把你丟掉

469
00:22:48,075 --> 00:22:50,077
你還覺得他對你好？

470
00:22:50,578 --> 00:22:52,705
對啊，如果道格不愛我

471
00:22:52,788 --> 00:22:54,957
怎會把剩菜剩飯給我吃？

472
00:22:55,041 --> 00:22:57,251
這樣他就不用買狗食

473
00:22:57,335 --> 00:22:59,337
他幹嘛不幫你戴項圈掛名牌？

474
00:22:59,420 --> 00:23:02,173
因為他不信這套

475
00:23:02,256 --> 00:23:03,299
北七喔，雷吉

476
00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:06,594
而且他幫我綁的領巾有意義多了

477
00:23:06,677 --> 00:23:09,180
他都拿來幫雞雞擦鼻涕

478
00:23:10,306 --> 00:23:11,641
道格是愛我的

479
00:23:11,724 --> 00:23:13,601
我們感情好得很

480
00:23:13,684 --> 00:23:15,561
你們不懂啦

481
00:23:15,645 --> 00:23:18,231
如果道格真那麼壞

482
00:23:18,314 --> 00:23:20,483
故意拋棄我

483
00:23:21,484 --> 00:23:23,069
故意傷害我

484
00:23:23,653 --> 00:23:26,405
那表示…那表示…

485
00:23:27,698 --> 00:23:28,950
道格不愛我

486
00:23:33,996 --> 00:23:36,332
讓我一個人靜一靜好嗎？

487
00:23:44,215 --> 00:23:45,383
可憐的小傢伙

488
00:23:45,466 --> 00:23:48,010
這就是典型的病態關係

489
00:23:48,094 --> 00:23:50,388
我應該去跟他聊聊，我是治療犬

490
00:23:50,471 --> 00:23:53,474
給他一點空間吧，那小鬼經歷了太多

491
00:23:55,476 --> 00:23:58,020
聽聽你那什麼破嗓，死廢渣

492
00:24:01,607 --> 00:24:02,733
走開啦！大爛狗！

493
00:24:02,817 --> 00:24:04,652
死狗！臭狗！

494
00:24:04,735 --> 00:24:07,446
沒看過你這種大爛狗！

495
00:24:16,497 --> 00:24:19,876
雷吉，你現在一定覺得很受傷

496
00:24:20,626 --> 00:24:22,545
不知道該怎麼辦才好

497
00:24:22,628 --> 00:24:23,754
我要回去找道格

498
00:24:23,838 --> 00:24:25,298
蝦米？ -搞屁喔？

499
00:24:25,381 --> 00:24:29,218
要怎樣你才會明白他沒在跟你玩遊戲？

500
00:24:29,302 --> 00:24:31,721
我沒要跟他玩遊戲

501
00:24:32,180 --> 00:24:33,431
好喔

502
00:24:33,514 --> 00:24:36,809
我這輩子都覺得自己超沒價值

503
00:24:36,893 --> 00:24:40,521
拚了狗命想聽到“乖狗狗”這句話

504
00:24:40,605 --> 00:24:42,148
但這句話從沒出現過

505
00:24:42,857 --> 00:24:45,443
我要他知道他傷了我

506
00:24:45,526 --> 00:24:46,777
我要他感受我的痛苦

507
00:24:47,486 --> 00:24:50,990
我要他付出代價，知道什麼叫做痛！

508
00:24:52,575 --> 00:24:54,285
我要咬下他的雞雞

509
00:24:54,911 --> 00:24:56,120
他剛是說…

510
00:24:56,204 --> 00:24:58,915
我還有點小醉，但你剛是說要…

511
00:24:58,998 --> 00:25:02,919
我說我要咬下他的雞雞！

512
00:25:04,253 --> 00:25:05,630
我舉四腳挺你到底

513
00:25:05,713 --> 00:25:07,089
不是吧 -蟲仔，等一下

514
00:25:07,173 --> 00:25:08,007
雷吉，等一下

515
00:25:08,090 --> 00:25:10,843
我懂，我真的懂，但也太扯了吧

516
00:25:10,927 --> 00:25:13,930
對啊，你可以意思意思咬個什麼東西

517
00:25:14,013 --> 00:25:17,266
把我的老二當成他的雞雞，好好罵一罵

518
00:25:17,350 --> 00:25:19,894
不行，就要他的雞雞

519
00:25:19,977 --> 00:25:22,021
他此生最愛就是跟他的雞雞玩

520
00:25:22,104 --> 00:25:23,773
後來忙著把東西裝箱才比較少

521
00:25:23,856 --> 00:25:25,816
裝箱？ -靠，那表示他要搬家了

522
00:25:25,900 --> 00:25:26,901
搬家？ -挫賽

523
00:25:26,984 --> 00:25:27,860
來不及怎麼辦？

524
00:25:27,944 --> 00:25:30,154
冷靜，時間緊迫

525
00:25:30,238 --> 00:25:33,366
你還記得一路上有什麼氣味或地標嗎？

526
00:25:34,408 --> 00:25:37,495
我記得經過一個超大倉鼠滾輪

527
00:25:37,578 --> 00:25:38,412
好，倉鼠滾輪

528
00:25:38,496 --> 00:25:41,123
一個跟杭特那個很像的超大頭套

529
00:25:41,207 --> 00:25:42,583
跟杭特那個很像的超大頭套，好

530
00:25:42,667 --> 00:25:44,627
還有空中魔鬼

531
00:25:44,710 --> 00:25:46,045
空中魔鬼，棒棒！

532
00:25:46,128 --> 00:25:49,757
道格牌美乃滋噴槍，我們來了

533
00:25:49,841 --> 00:25:51,551
蟲仔，別傻了，不可能

534
00:25:51,634 --> 00:25:52,885
聽我說

535
00:25:52,969 --> 00:25:55,888
要雷吉自己及時趕回去是不可能

536
00:25:55,972 --> 00:26:00,059
但加上我們，我有小聰明，你有大肌肌

537
00:26:00,142 --> 00:26:03,938
瑪姬鼻子超靈，隨便聞就知道

538
00:26:04,021 --> 00:26:06,566
你三頓早餐前嗑了啥

539
00:26:06,649 --> 00:26:07,525
一堆硬幣

540
00:26:07,608 --> 00:26:09,026
正解 -她超強的

541
00:26:09,110 --> 00:26:11,028
各位，我們可以的

542
00:26:11,112 --> 00:26:12,905
這樣不好吧… -算我一咖

543
00:26:12,989 --> 00:26:15,491
好懷念的港覺，上啦！

544
00:26:16,033 --> 00:26:18,202
真假？你們願意為了我這麼做？

545
00:26:18,286 --> 00:26:19,537
當然，我們罩你，老弟

546
00:26:19,620 --> 00:26:20,955
對啊！ -好來

547
00:26:21,038 --> 00:26:24,083
來去教訓一下這些人類

548
00:26:24,166 --> 00:26:27,336
射後不理，遲早要還的

549
00:26:27,420 --> 00:26:28,421
兄弟們

550
00:26:28,838 --> 00:26:29,797
還有妳

551
00:26:29,881 --> 00:26:31,716
復仇狗聯盟出動！

552
00:26:33,426 --> 00:26:36,679
凹嗚！凹嗚！

553
00:26:36,762 --> 00:26:37,930
凹嗚！

554
00:26:39,432 --> 00:26:41,017
人家不太會凹嗚

555
00:26:55,656 --> 00:26:57,992
（幹你娘！）

556
00:27:20,389 --> 00:27:21,974
（看三小！）

557
00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:32,818
凹嗚！凹嗚！

558
00:27:36,447 --> 00:27:38,407
怎麼沒人跟我說狗狗的旅程

559
00:27:38,491 --> 00:27:39,659
媽的這麼操？

560
00:27:39,742 --> 00:27:41,494
就是啊 -救人喔

561
00:27:41,577 --> 00:27:43,538
我當時一定還在醉

562
00:27:43,621 --> 00:27:44,580
我餓到想殺人

563
00:27:44,664 --> 00:27:45,748
我餓到快死了

564
00:27:45,831 --> 00:27:47,291
我剛吐了

565
00:27:47,375 --> 00:27:49,418
裡面可能有…

566
00:27:49,502 --> 00:27:50,753
請享用

567
00:27:50,837 --> 00:27:52,505
裡面一定有昨晚的披薩

568
00:27:52,588 --> 00:27:54,590
裡面有很多好東西

569
00:27:54,674 --> 00:27:55,716
有硬幣

570
00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:58,511
繼續往前走吧，不可能沒看到

571
00:27:58,594 --> 00:28:01,347
就是個超大倉鼠滾輪，只是沒倉鼠

572
00:28:01,430 --> 00:28:02,890
而且有熱狗的味道

573
00:28:02,974 --> 00:28:04,517
有熱狗的味道？

574
00:28:05,393 --> 00:28:08,312
她有超能力，超神的，看看那鼻子

575
00:28:08,396 --> 00:28:10,398
有發現嗎？ -等一下

576
00:28:10,481 --> 00:28:11,941
有聞到嗎？

577
00:28:12,024 --> 00:28:13,359
我只聞到塑膠味

578
00:28:13,442 --> 00:28:15,653
喔耶，有了

579
00:28:16,571 --> 00:28:18,489
她走咧，要跟嗎？

580
00:28:19,198 --> 00:28:20,491
我要跟

581
00:28:21,742 --> 00:28:23,995
不對，香腸長得像大便

582
00:28:24,078 --> 00:28:26,789
但沒大便味 -那跟熱狗差在哪？

583
00:28:26,873 --> 00:28:29,083
大家安靜，這什麼鬼東西？

584
00:28:29,166 --> 00:28:32,128
找到了，超大倉鼠滾輪！沒走錯路！

585
00:28:32,211 --> 00:28:34,338
好的，各位，雖然時間緊迫

586
00:28:34,422 --> 00:28:36,924
但再不吃東西，杭特就要GG了

587
00:28:37,008 --> 00:28:38,384
瑪姬，妳跟杭特一組 -收到

588
00:28:38,467 --> 00:28:40,553
好主意 -雷吉，現在什麼時間？

589
00:28:40,636 --> 00:28:42,388
放飯時間 -放飯時間

590
00:28:42,471 --> 00:28:44,640
沒錯，放飯去 -放飯去

591
00:28:44,724 --> 00:28:45,975
（市集）

592
00:28:46,058 --> 00:28:48,019
這地方有夠怪 -超怪的

593
00:28:48,102 --> 00:28:49,812
我實在搞不懂人類

594
00:28:49,896 --> 00:28:53,232
尤其是白皮膚那種，根本是死怪咖

595
00:28:53,316 --> 00:28:55,109
{\an8}我也這麼覺得

596
00:28:56,235 --> 00:28:57,361
{\an8}（套圈圈）

597
00:29:00,948 --> 00:29:02,116
你的狗害我失手了

598
00:29:03,201 --> 00:29:05,995
牠應該是要我請妳玩一局

599
00:29:06,871 --> 00:29:07,830
是喔？

600
00:29:07,914 --> 00:29:10,208
牠真這麼說，沒蓋妳

601
00:29:11,584 --> 00:29:14,837
我沒亂掰喔，就聽牠的吧

602
00:29:14,921 --> 00:29:18,132
看得出來詹姆士尬意這人類女生

603
00:29:18,216 --> 00:29:21,177
可能是因為她身上有餅乾的味道

604
00:29:21,260 --> 00:29:24,055
也可能是她身上有什麼特別之處

605
00:29:24,138 --> 00:29:26,849
請問一下，你知道哪裡有吃的嗎？

606
00:29:29,060 --> 00:29:32,939
話說，詹姆士以為自己在幫這女生

607
00:29:33,022 --> 00:29:35,942
但其實是她在幫他

608
00:29:36,025 --> 00:29:38,778
少屁了啦 -他在幹嘛？

609
00:29:38,861 --> 00:29:41,822
我看過這玩意，他是旁白狗

610
00:29:41,906 --> 00:29:45,701
阿呆！沒人想聽瞎到爆的人類故事

611
00:29:49,455 --> 00:29:51,707
可惜這隻小狗狗說的沒錯

612
00:29:51,791 --> 00:29:54,335
沒人在聽我說故事

613
00:29:54,794 --> 00:29:57,421
太悲劇了，因為只有我知道

614
00:29:57,505 --> 00:29:59,924
詹姆士是個冷血連環殺人魔

615
00:30:00,007 --> 00:30:03,886
家裡後院已經埋了三具屍體

616
00:30:03,970 --> 00:30:06,138
但應該沒人想知道吧

617
00:30:06,222 --> 00:30:07,723
那隻狗有夠誇張

618
00:30:07,807 --> 00:30:10,142
瘋狂迷戀主人，完全不鳥我們

619
00:30:10,226 --> 00:30:13,145
聽好了，拴上狗鏈、喀嚓蛋蛋那一刻

620
00:30:13,229 --> 00:30:14,897
你就沉淪下去了

621
00:30:14,981 --> 00:30:18,359
什麼鬼，喀嚓蛋蛋？ -沒錯

622
00:30:18,442 --> 00:30:21,237
人類也收集狗蛋蛋，用來做巧克力

623
00:30:21,320 --> 00:30:23,406
來喔，好吃的熱狗 -靠！快看！

624
00:30:23,489 --> 00:30:24,323
這裡有大熱狗！

625
00:30:24,407 --> 00:30:26,409
計畫是這樣，你負責幹香腸

626
00:30:26,492 --> 00:30:28,911
我負責操他的腳，分散他的注意力

627
00:30:28,995 --> 00:30:30,454
出動！

628
00:30:31,539 --> 00:30:34,166
應該沒必要操他的腳吧

629
00:30:34,250 --> 00:30:36,335
不過既然你都衝了，那好唄

630
00:30:37,211 --> 00:30:39,672
給我，兔兔！ -中咧！

631
00:30:40,423 --> 00:30:42,175
我中咧！ -耶！

632
00:30:42,258 --> 00:30:43,968
好可愛的兔兔喔

633
00:30:44,051 --> 00:30:47,805
離家不到一天，我就好想念我的玩具

634
00:30:47,889 --> 00:30:49,182
珍娜的玩具超讚的

635
00:30:49,265 --> 00:30:52,935
我會扯爛娃娃，挖出那個嘰嘰叫的玩意

636
00:30:53,895 --> 00:30:54,979
我也超想念嘰嘰叫玩具

637
00:30:55,062 --> 00:30:58,191
但我要乖乖才能玩玩具

638
00:30:58,274 --> 00:31:01,235
還要在她自拍時笑得超北七

639
00:31:01,319 --> 00:31:04,113
拚老命賣萌裝可愛

640
00:31:04,197 --> 00:31:06,866
老娘還得像這樣華麗轉圈

641
00:31:06,949 --> 00:31:09,744
雙手交叉，擺出“來操我啊”的姿勢

642
00:31:09,827 --> 00:31:11,913
還要兩腳站立，手舉高高

643
00:31:11,996 --> 00:31:14,040
大露我的奶子

644
00:31:14,123 --> 00:31:16,501
真的，超欠操的

645
00:31:16,584 --> 00:31:19,170
我是說，超詭異的

646
00:31:20,004 --> 00:31:20,838
就是這樣

647
00:31:22,256 --> 00:31:24,008
瑪姬，那個…

648
00:31:24,675 --> 00:31:27,386
除了外表，妳還有很多地方討人喜歡

649
00:31:27,470 --> 00:31:28,471
真的嗎？

650
00:31:28,554 --> 00:31:32,808
真的，妳的嗅探能力超強的

651
00:31:33,434 --> 00:31:36,062
妳冰雪聰明、彈跳一流

652
00:31:36,145 --> 00:31:39,232
妳還懂9個人類用語，超狂的

653
00:31:39,315 --> 00:31:41,984
其實是31個，不過謝謝你

654
00:31:42,068 --> 00:31:44,237
說真的，我隨便都能列出超多優點

655
00:31:44,320 --> 00:31:47,156
更不用說妳有多麼美麗

656
00:31:51,410 --> 00:31:52,662
抱歉，好像太超過了

657
00:31:52,745 --> 00:31:55,623
不會，謝謝你這麼說

658
00:31:56,207 --> 00:31:58,584
你真的很懂得傾聽

659
00:31:58,668 --> 00:32:01,629
因為我自帶頭套幫我攔截聲音

660
00:32:01,712 --> 00:32:04,340
我不是…算了

661
00:32:04,841 --> 00:32:05,675
什麼啦？

662
00:32:06,092 --> 00:32:07,385
你有想過…

663
00:32:07,468 --> 00:32:09,846
把頭套拿下來一下下嗎？

664
00:32:09,929 --> 00:32:11,597
看看會怎樣？

665
00:32:11,681 --> 00:32:14,600
不要 -拿下來一定超帥的

666
00:32:15,977 --> 00:32:16,811
真假？

667
00:32:17,895 --> 00:32:18,729
真的

668
00:32:19,647 --> 00:32:21,691
就是這樣，雷吉北鼻 -水啦！

669
00:32:22,441 --> 00:32:24,277
但幾咧，這氣氛是怎樣？

670
00:32:24,360 --> 00:32:27,238
什麼氣氛？ -沒事啊，怎樣嗎？

671
00:32:27,321 --> 00:32:30,408
沒事啦 -你老二都硬了

672
00:32:31,367 --> 00:32:34,996
那是因為我們的友情…讓我超嗨

673
00:32:35,079 --> 00:32:36,706
對啊，是友情的關係

674
00:32:36,789 --> 00:32:38,708
那你看到我們怎麼不會硬起來？

675
00:32:38,791 --> 00:32:41,085
我們不是你的捧油嗎？

676
00:32:41,169 --> 00:32:43,754
拜託，你們害我整天硬梆梆

677
00:32:44,755 --> 00:32:47,258
杭特，這是我聽過最窩心的告白了

678
00:32:47,341 --> 00:32:50,094
說到老二，要不要來點香腸？

679
00:32:50,178 --> 00:32:51,053
從人類那裡幹來的

680
00:32:51,637 --> 00:32:54,015
從人類那裡偷來的？被看到怎麼辦？

681
00:32:54,098 --> 00:32:58,144
安啦，有點guts好嗎？沒人看到啦

682
00:33:00,646 --> 00:33:03,524
老天看到了！老天看得一清二楚！

683
00:33:03,608 --> 00:33:04,525
快跑！

684
00:33:06,068 --> 00:33:07,820
{\an8}遭受攻擊！ -各自保重！

685
00:33:07,904 --> 00:33:08,905
{\an8}快找掩護！

686
00:33:08,988 --> 00:33:11,365
{\an8}這地方要炸了！

687
00:33:11,449 --> 00:33:12,575
衝啊！衝啊！

688
00:33:14,076 --> 00:33:15,745
我們要死了！

689
00:33:16,579 --> 00:33:17,705
媽媽！

690
00:33:21,250 --> 00:33:22,710
快閃！ -壓低！

691
00:33:22,793 --> 00:33:25,713
我們被包圍了！ -快快快！

692
00:33:25,796 --> 00:33:26,631
快跑！ -追兵來了！

693
00:33:26,714 --> 00:33:28,049
這邊走，快！

694
00:33:28,132 --> 00:33:29,842
戴頭套聽起來超大聲！

695
00:33:32,845 --> 00:33:33,721
靠！ -糟了！

696
00:33:33,804 --> 00:33:35,348
可惡！ -要過去才行

697
00:33:35,431 --> 00:33:37,892
過來，快挖！用力挖！

698
00:33:37,975 --> 00:33:39,018
快挖！

699
00:33:39,101 --> 00:33:40,561
杭特！瑪姬！來幫忙！

700
00:33:40,645 --> 00:33:42,897
怎麼了？ -瑪姬！快挖！

701
00:33:43,397 --> 00:33:47,109
妳說妳愛挖土！ -我騙人！我超恨！

702
00:33:47,193 --> 00:33:48,569
可以了，快走！

703
00:33:48,653 --> 00:33:51,113
我恨死指縫卡土的感覺 -快閃！

704
00:33:51,197 --> 00:33:54,408
等一下！我的領巾卡住了！

705
00:33:56,869 --> 00:33:58,454
糟糕！ -雷吉！

706
00:33:58,538 --> 00:34:00,498
雷吉！ -雷吉！加油！

707
00:34:00,581 --> 00:34:01,666
瑪姬、杭特，一起來

708
00:34:01,749 --> 00:34:04,418
不行，你們快走，太遲了

709
00:34:04,502 --> 00:34:06,128
給我聽好！還來得及！

710
00:34:06,212 --> 00:34:07,964
不行，你們快逃

711
00:34:08,047 --> 00:34:10,800
轉告道格，我本想親口咬下他的雞雞

712
00:34:11,592 --> 00:34:13,511
可以的話，幫我完成

713
00:34:13,594 --> 00:34:15,763
看著我，你要活下來

714
00:34:15,847 --> 00:34:19,016
你要親口咬下他的雞雞

715
00:34:20,059 --> 00:34:21,811
杭特，鐵絲網！

716
00:34:23,187 --> 00:34:24,480
你們看

717
00:34:25,606 --> 00:34:26,649
快啊！

718
00:34:26,732 --> 00:34:28,860
靠腰咧，他們有炸彈！

719
00:34:30,027 --> 00:34:32,905
雷吉，加油！ -快啊！

720
00:34:36,199 --> 00:34:38,661
快了！快了！ -加油！雷吉！

721
00:34:39,704 --> 00:34:40,538
搞定，快閃！

722
00:34:41,873 --> 00:34:43,875
快快快！ -快啊！

723
00:34:48,920 --> 00:34:50,047
歪腰

724
00:34:51,757 --> 00:34:52,632
有人要親親嗎？

725
00:34:54,135 --> 00:34:55,969
我的媽！超驚險！

726
00:34:56,053 --> 00:34:57,804
也太刺激了吧！

727
00:34:57,889 --> 00:34:59,765
給我來一隻情緒支持犬

728
00:34:59,849 --> 00:35:02,810
蟲仔，你看起來一副要挫賽的樣子

729
00:35:02,894 --> 00:35:04,896
我真的挫賽了

730
00:35:04,979 --> 00:35:06,480
媽啊！ -真的，我踩到了

731
00:35:07,648 --> 00:35:08,524
雷吉，沒事吧？

732
00:35:09,525 --> 00:35:11,444
沒事，只是…

733
00:35:11,861 --> 00:35:13,571
你們為了我冒生命危險

734
00:35:14,155 --> 00:35:15,323
蟲仔，你救了我

735
00:35:15,990 --> 00:35:17,074
我從沒想過會有人這樣對我

736
00:35:17,158 --> 00:35:18,784
一定要的

737
00:35:18,868 --> 00:35:21,329
拜託！你是我們好麻吉欸，雷吉

738
00:35:21,412 --> 00:35:22,830
同生共死 -沒錯

739
00:35:22,914 --> 00:35:24,624
我從沒有過什麼好麻吉

740
00:35:24,707 --> 00:35:27,668
現在有啦 -我不知道有這種東西

741
00:35:28,503 --> 00:35:30,254
我們就是啊 -對啊

742
00:35:30,338 --> 00:35:33,049
那…我有個奇怪的想法

743
00:35:33,966 --> 00:35:35,801
我們可不可以…

744
00:35:37,428 --> 00:35:38,304
尿在彼此身上？

745
00:35:38,387 --> 00:35:39,305
蝦毀？

746
00:35:39,889 --> 00:35:43,017
你說想要什麼，尿了就是你的

747
00:35:43,100 --> 00:35:45,895
我想說既然我們是好麻吉…

748
00:35:45,978 --> 00:35:48,981
尿在彼此身上，表示擁有彼此？

749
00:35:49,065 --> 00:35:50,316
對

750
00:35:51,317 --> 00:35:52,276
我超白癡的

751
00:35:52,818 --> 00:35:55,655
我滿身尿回家，珍娜一定爆氣

752
00:35:57,323 --> 00:35:58,533
來開尿吧

753
00:35:58,616 --> 00:36:00,826
來尿吧，要不要圍成一圈…

754
00:36:00,910 --> 00:36:03,162
大家抬起左後腳 -到右邊去

755
00:36:03,246 --> 00:36:05,665
抬左後腳 -左後腳好

756
00:36:05,748 --> 00:36:08,417
很好，我尿在蟲仔身上 -左後腳讚

757
00:36:10,086 --> 00:36:14,006
身體暖了，心也暖了

758
00:36:14,882 --> 00:36:16,759
我們現在是一家人啦

759
00:36:16,843 --> 00:36:18,803
好麻吉認證 -沒錯

760
00:36:18,886 --> 00:36:21,514
我們更帥，我們是撒尿好麻吉

761
00:36:21,597 --> 00:36:23,516
撒尿好麻吉！偶喜翻

762
00:36:23,599 --> 00:36:26,018
哇尬意 -蟲仔！

763
00:36:26,102 --> 00:36:28,062
你看起來很開心！

764
00:36:28,145 --> 00:36:30,606
我哪裡開心？我笑是因為

765
00:36:30,690 --> 00:36:33,359
大家在這邊互尿，我是皮笑肉不笑

766
00:36:33,442 --> 00:36:34,443
沒動真感情

767
00:36:34,527 --> 00:36:36,028
你愛我們！ -你愛我們！

768
00:36:36,112 --> 00:36:37,613
好了，夠囉 -沒錯

769
00:36:37,697 --> 00:36:39,115
是真愛 -睡搞搞吧

770
00:36:39,198 --> 00:36:40,825
少來，蟲仔 -聽我說

771
00:36:40,908 --> 00:36:43,661
還有很長的路要走，時間不多

772
00:36:43,744 --> 00:36:44,871
趕快睡覺吧

773
00:36:46,163 --> 00:36:47,081
等一下

774
00:36:50,793 --> 00:36:53,004
轉另一邊 -另一邊比較好

775
00:36:53,087 --> 00:36:54,547
你聞過地板了嗎？

776
00:36:54,630 --> 00:36:56,924
那很爛 -你要重新來

777
00:36:57,008 --> 00:36:58,718
往回90度 -那也很爛

778
00:36:58,801 --> 00:37:01,512
可以趴下了 -行了，這樣好！

779
00:37:01,596 --> 00:37:04,682
終於，該睡了 -來睡覺吧

780
00:37:05,391 --> 00:37:07,226
來轉圈 -等一下

781
00:37:07,310 --> 00:37:09,687
1圈、2圈、3圈 -真是

782
00:37:09,770 --> 00:37:11,981
蟲仔害我搞混 -再一圈

783
00:37:12,064 --> 00:37:13,941
好了，搞定 -5、4

784
00:37:14,025 --> 00:37:15,985
3、2、1 -再一圈，好了

785
00:37:16,068 --> 00:37:18,321
好了，完成

786
00:37:18,404 --> 00:37:19,947
趴下

787
00:37:21,324 --> 00:37:22,450
我速度有變快

788
00:37:24,076 --> 00:37:25,036
大家晚安

789
00:37:25,119 --> 00:37:26,537
雷吉晚安 -雷吉晚安

790
00:37:26,621 --> 00:37:28,414
再此感謝讓我尿在你們身上

791
00:37:28,497 --> 00:37:30,791
雷吉？惦惦好嗎？

792
00:37:30,875 --> 00:37:32,543
好喔 -甘溫

793
00:37:42,220 --> 00:37:45,473
又是嶄新的一天，下一站超大頭套

794
00:37:45,556 --> 00:37:47,725
荒郊野外哪來的頭套

795
00:37:47,808 --> 00:37:50,228
不會太難找，超巨大一個

796
00:37:50,311 --> 00:37:52,021
我只看到一堆樹，隨便啦

797
00:37:52,647 --> 00:37:54,982
老弟，你想過要怎麼做嗎？

798
00:37:55,691 --> 00:37:58,361
拍謝，做什麼？ -咬下道格的雞雞

799
00:37:58,444 --> 00:38:01,239
從旁邊還是從頭開始？

800
00:38:01,322 --> 00:38:04,575
不知道欸，我沒什麼經驗

801
00:38:04,659 --> 00:38:06,577
到時候即興發揮好了

802
00:38:06,661 --> 00:38:08,454
你打算什麼時候

803
00:38:08,538 --> 00:38:11,249
才要硬起來出手搞定？

804
00:38:11,332 --> 00:38:12,542
你說瑪姬？ -啊不然咧？

805
00:38:12,625 --> 00:38:15,253
難道是青苔口味的樹幹嗎？

806
00:38:15,336 --> 00:38:17,213
不可能啦，她不會喜歡我

807
00:38:17,296 --> 00:38:19,590
也許以後大門會為我而開

808
00:38:19,674 --> 00:38:20,842
但現在我們只是朋友

809
00:38:20,925 --> 00:38:22,552
說什麼鬼，開什麼門？

810
00:38:22,635 --> 00:38:25,805
我們又沒大拇哥，要用撞的門才會開

811
00:38:25,888 --> 00:38:28,349
誰會喜歡一隻當不成警犬

812
00:38:28,432 --> 00:38:30,393
整天頂著頭套的狗？

813
00:38:30,476 --> 00:38:33,896
拜託，女生最愛遜咖了好嗎？

814
00:38:34,605 --> 00:38:38,025
雷吉，其實你不一定要這麼做

815
00:38:38,109 --> 00:38:40,027
什麼意思？當然要啊

816
00:38:40,111 --> 00:38:43,114
我要咬爆那根雞雞，卡滋卡滋

817
00:38:43,197 --> 00:38:46,284
是啦，但你其實可以忘掉道格

818
00:38:46,367 --> 00:38:48,077
沒必要特別報復他

819
00:38:48,160 --> 00:38:49,912
放下一切重新開始

820
00:38:51,956 --> 00:38:53,958
我才不要就這麼算了

821
00:38:54,041 --> 00:38:57,128
聽我說，你因為太孬考試不及格

822
00:38:57,211 --> 00:38:59,213
但過去就讓它過去吧

823
00:38:59,297 --> 00:39:02,633
我們倒可以把你頭上那玩意弄下來

824
00:39:02,717 --> 00:39:04,510
不要，不行

825
00:39:04,594 --> 00:39:06,846
當然行，大家一起用力拉…

826
00:39:06,929 --> 00:39:11,100
不是，我需要它，我是故意一直戴著

827
00:39:11,184 --> 00:39:12,560
真假？

828
00:39:12,643 --> 00:39:14,353
我以為是醫療用的

829
00:39:14,437 --> 00:39:15,688
是啊

830
00:39:15,771 --> 00:39:19,817
我會拼命保住頭套，只要自殘就行

831
00:39:19,901 --> 00:39:22,570
比如故意被貓抓傷、故意耳朵感染

832
00:39:22,653 --> 00:39:26,616
狂舔蛋蛋舔到人類受不了

833
00:39:26,699 --> 00:39:29,327
不過很值得，我很常焦慮

834
00:39:29,410 --> 00:39:31,871
頭套可以…給我安全感

835
00:39:32,997 --> 00:39:34,290
你們在聊什麼？

836
00:39:34,373 --> 00:39:36,501
沒什麼，還不就那些

837
00:39:36,584 --> 00:39:39,086
我在叫他要硬起來

838
00:39:39,170 --> 00:39:41,756
蟲仔！ -你那麼大OK的啦

839
00:39:41,839 --> 00:39:44,217
感謝妳稱讚我的老二

840
00:39:44,300 --> 00:39:46,135
妳的小穴也滿大的

841
00:39:46,219 --> 00:39:48,721
真假？ -靠，我是北七喔

842
00:39:51,224 --> 00:39:52,725
雷吉，問你喔 -什麼？

843
00:39:52,808 --> 00:39:55,228
你有多確定超大頭套往這邊走？

844
00:39:55,311 --> 00:39:56,646
不知道欸

845
00:39:56,729 --> 00:40:00,316
在確定和不確定之間，我非常確定…

846
00:40:02,485 --> 00:40:04,320
我不太確定

847
00:40:04,403 --> 00:40:05,947
靠北咧！我們迷路了

848
00:40:06,030 --> 00:40:07,323
這下可好 -我就知道

849
00:40:07,406 --> 00:40:10,284
冷靜，蟲仔，會有辦法的，還有更慘的

850
00:40:10,368 --> 00:40:11,577
甘安捏？

851
00:40:11,661 --> 00:40:13,496
林北餓到爆，我們大迷路

852
00:40:13,579 --> 00:40:16,165
我的小狗掌現在超痛的

853
00:40:16,249 --> 00:40:18,292
還有可能更慘嗎？

854
00:40:19,418 --> 00:40:20,962
你說說看

855
00:40:21,045 --> 00:40:22,296
還有可能更慘嗎？

856
00:40:24,882 --> 00:40:26,133
蟲仔！

857
00:40:26,217 --> 00:40:28,135
我幹嘛烏鴉嘴？ -靠腰！靠腰！

858
00:40:28,219 --> 00:40:30,388
拜託不要放手！拜託不要吃我！

859
00:40:30,471 --> 00:40:31,722
老鷹也太會抓時間了吧！

860
00:40:31,806 --> 00:40:33,349
蟲仔！撐住啊！

861
00:40:33,432 --> 00:40:34,892
雷吉！救我！

862
00:40:34,976 --> 00:40:37,103
問他能不能飛低一點！

863
00:40:37,186 --> 00:40:39,188
三小？我又不會講鳥語！

864
00:40:39,272 --> 00:40:41,065
代誌大條了！ -救命…

865
00:40:41,148 --> 00:40:42,942
快想想辦法！

866
00:40:43,025 --> 00:40:44,235
媽啊！

867
00:40:47,238 --> 00:40:48,114
{\an8}（幹！）

868
00:40:48,197 --> 00:40:49,323
水啦！

869
00:40:49,824 --> 00:40:51,492
靠，要瘋了，飛更高了啦！

870
00:40:51,576 --> 00:40:54,036
撐住！ -雷吉！蟲仔！

871
00:40:54,120 --> 00:40:56,998
哇靠，從這角度看你的蛋好大顆！

872
00:40:57,081 --> 00:40:59,959
甘溫！現在沒空講幹話！

873
00:41:01,043 --> 00:41:04,255
那是一隻金頰鶯

874
00:41:05,214 --> 00:41:06,632
我沒看過這種鳥

875
00:41:09,385 --> 00:41:10,887
（鳥）

876
00:41:13,890 --> 00:41:14,724
打勾

877
00:41:22,315 --> 00:41:24,734
見鬼了

878
00:41:24,817 --> 00:41:27,945
沒看過這麼屌的畫面

879
00:41:29,405 --> 00:41:33,659
老子是丹尼斯奎德欸，我看的可多了

880
00:41:33,743 --> 00:41:37,205
放開我！ -蟲仔你看！超大頭套！

881
00:41:37,288 --> 00:41:38,748
啥？ -超大頭套！

882
00:41:38,831 --> 00:41:40,791
對欸！靠

883
00:41:40,875 --> 00:41:43,377
這隻死賤鳥幹嘛跑來亂！

884
00:41:44,462 --> 00:41:47,089
蟲仔！我有辦法，撐住！

885
00:41:48,424 --> 00:41:49,425
你幹嘛？

886
00:41:50,301 --> 00:41:52,845
靠北！太狂了！

887
00:41:54,013 --> 00:41:55,223
太狂了啦！

888
00:41:56,390 --> 00:41:57,600
來囉！

889
00:42:01,729 --> 00:42:02,772
有夠…

890
00:42:04,315 --> 00:42:05,775
（幹！不會吧！）

891
00:42:07,860 --> 00:42:08,986
雷吉！蟲仔！

892
00:42:09,820 --> 00:42:11,155
救命！ -降肉！

893
00:42:11,239 --> 00:42:12,281
靠！ -降肉！

894
00:42:12,365 --> 00:42:13,366
幹！

895
00:42:16,077 --> 00:42:18,079
我操…

896
00:42:19,622 --> 00:42:22,834
哇，他們真的是撞好撞滿耶

897
00:42:22,917 --> 00:42:23,793
降肉！

898
00:42:23,876 --> 00:42:25,253
我的小狗掌！

899
00:42:25,336 --> 00:42:27,421
脖子！尾巴！

900
00:42:29,131 --> 00:42:31,008
歐買尬，真是拍謝

901
00:42:31,092 --> 00:42:33,970
我不是故意打擾三位，在玩摔角嗎？

902
00:42:34,554 --> 00:42:35,763
降肉！

903
00:42:36,347 --> 00:42:37,223
蟲仔！

904
00:42:38,766 --> 00:42:40,476
雷吉！ -你們沒死！

905
00:42:40,560 --> 00:42:43,563
媽的，樹枝插我屁屁

906
00:42:43,646 --> 00:42:46,190
杭特說的對，還有更慘的

907
00:42:46,274 --> 00:42:47,900
趕快出去啦

908
00:42:47,984 --> 00:42:50,403
雷吉，你真的超神勇的

909
00:42:50,486 --> 00:42:51,571
太牛逼啦

910
00:42:52,071 --> 00:42:53,781
天殺的葉子，走開！

911
00:42:53,865 --> 00:42:56,117
好消息！我們看到超大頭套了

912
00:42:56,200 --> 00:42:57,034
真假？ -對啊

913
00:42:57,577 --> 00:42:58,619
太棒了

914
00:42:58,703 --> 00:43:00,079
表示我們方向正確

915
00:43:00,162 --> 00:43:01,497
不是我要耍冷

916
00:43:01,581 --> 00:43:04,959
剛掛在半空中，離死亡那麼近

917
00:43:06,586 --> 00:43:07,670
我頓悟了一件事

918
00:43:07,753 --> 00:43:08,713
什麼事？-啥？

919
00:43:09,380 --> 00:43:10,631
鳥鳥沒有鳥鳥

920
00:43:11,674 --> 00:43:12,925
那他們怎麼…

921
00:43:13,009 --> 00:43:16,888
阿災，說不定他們公母同體

922
00:43:17,471 --> 00:43:21,517
所以還真的可以罵他們“去操自己”

923
00:43:23,394 --> 00:43:24,645
好喔

924
00:43:24,729 --> 00:43:28,024
那接下來就剩空中魔鬼囉

925
00:43:29,817 --> 00:43:30,985
凹嗚

926
00:43:31,068 --> 00:43:32,904
走吧走吧，就快到了

927
00:43:33,487 --> 00:43:34,530
我的凹嗚有進步欸

928
00:43:34,614 --> 00:43:36,157
有發現嗎？ -你好棒喔

929
00:43:36,240 --> 00:43:37,742
老弟 -怎樣？

930
00:43:37,825 --> 00:43:39,118
感謝你剛剛做的一切

931
00:43:39,952 --> 00:43:43,831
是不用再互尿之類的啦，不過謝謝你

932
00:43:43,915 --> 00:43:46,167
三八啦，我們是撒尿好麻吉欸

933
00:43:46,250 --> 00:43:47,460
同生共死

934
00:43:48,127 --> 00:43:49,629
好了，夠了

935
00:43:49,712 --> 00:43:50,880
舌頭給我縮回去

936
00:43:55,551 --> 00:43:59,096
好啦，我從沒幫母狗舔過

937
00:43:59,180 --> 00:44:01,933
真假？你們不是一天到晚舔蛋蛋

938
00:44:02,016 --> 00:44:03,768
那不一樣 -不一樣啦

939
00:44:03,851 --> 00:44:05,353
差在哪？ -差多了

940
00:44:05,436 --> 00:44:06,604
骨頭跟餅乾的差別

941
00:44:06,687 --> 00:44:08,356
竟然只有我有經驗

942
00:44:08,439 --> 00:44:09,899
妳有舔過…

943
00:44:09,982 --> 00:44:12,109
我是在體驗，拜託，那時我兩歲

944
00:44:12,193 --> 00:44:13,569
難怪 -兩歲就是這樣

945
00:44:13,653 --> 00:44:14,695
轉大人的概念

946
00:44:17,323 --> 00:44:20,993
我想到一個，你們寧願吃大便還是…

947
00:44:21,077 --> 00:44:22,995
吃大便 -肯定是吃大便

948
00:44:23,079 --> 00:44:24,497
我還沒講完欸

949
00:44:24,580 --> 00:44:25,831
不重要，我愛便便

950
00:44:27,083 --> 00:44:29,627
再來一題，狗狗從後面來

951
00:44:29,710 --> 00:44:31,587
好喔 -叫什麼體位？

952
00:44:31,671 --> 00:44:33,130
當然是狗爬式 -狗爬式

953
00:44:33,214 --> 00:44:35,341
我們有別的選擇嗎？

954
00:44:35,424 --> 00:44:38,261
我個人只知道狗爬式，幹了一輩子

955
00:44:38,344 --> 00:44:39,387
那人類怎麼愛愛？

956
00:44:39,470 --> 00:44:41,848
人類男生會假裝自己是狗

957
00:44:41,931 --> 00:44:43,683
人類女生假裝自己是沙發

958
00:44:43,766 --> 00:44:46,435
很複雜啦 -真的捏

959
00:44:46,519 --> 00:44:48,187
大自然很奧妙的

960
00:44:52,400 --> 00:44:54,694
我想到一個笑話，叩叩叩

961
00:44:55,361 --> 00:44:56,988
不是啦，你們要問：是誰啊？

962
00:44:57,071 --> 00:44:59,073
了解了解 -叩叩叩

963
00:45:00,491 --> 00:45:03,035
吼唷，到底要不要聽笑話

964
00:45:03,119 --> 00:45:04,453
拜託，門口有人欸

965
00:45:04,537 --> 00:45:06,998
門口有陌生人不是開玩笑的

966
00:45:07,081 --> 00:45:08,833
一群北七

967
00:45:16,424 --> 00:45:19,802
有找到什麼嗎？ -沒有，靠，有夠餓

968
00:45:19,886 --> 00:45:22,221
那邊有吃的嗎？比如辣雞披薩？

969
00:45:22,305 --> 00:45:23,598
只有松鼠大便

970
00:45:23,681 --> 00:45:26,559
我不想再吃了，拉出來長一樣

971
00:45:26,642 --> 00:45:28,686
嘿，我找到吃的了

972
00:45:29,645 --> 00:45:30,813
什麼東東？

973
00:45:34,358 --> 00:45:36,402
這啥？ -長得像吃的

974
00:45:36,485 --> 00:45:37,904
不知道欸

975
00:45:39,780 --> 00:45:41,157
我看看 -美麥喔

976
00:45:41,240 --> 00:45:43,743
我要嗑了 -可以吃多少？

977
00:45:43,826 --> 00:45:45,411
怒吃一波？ -沒差吧

978
00:45:45,494 --> 00:45:48,497
好吃欸，這個辣辣的

979
00:45:49,207 --> 00:45:50,750
有堅果味

980
00:45:57,548 --> 00:45:58,758
送啦

981
00:45:59,634 --> 00:46:01,594
應該可以頂一陣子，超飽

982
00:46:03,221 --> 00:46:04,764
上路啦

983
00:46:04,847 --> 00:46:07,099
靠，但幾咧

984
00:46:08,643 --> 00:46:10,144
什麼鬼？

985
00:46:19,445 --> 00:46:21,739
杭特，你的頭套

986
00:46:21,822 --> 00:46:24,867
哇災，應該要拿下來

987
00:46:24,951 --> 00:46:26,827
不是，頭套長大了

988
00:46:26,911 --> 00:46:29,914
歐買尬…

989
00:46:30,414 --> 00:46:31,999
蟲仔 -不會吧

990
00:46:32,583 --> 00:46:34,168
蟲仔！

991
00:46:34,252 --> 00:46:35,086
不可能

992
00:46:37,338 --> 00:46:38,214
朵朵！

993
00:46:38,965 --> 00:46:40,049
哈囉，蟲仔

994
00:46:40,132 --> 00:46:41,342
妳在這衝蝦毀？

995
00:46:41,425 --> 00:46:42,635
我們需要聊聊

996
00:46:42,718 --> 00:46:45,137
瑪姬，妳怪怪的

997
00:46:45,221 --> 00:46:48,641
是喔？靠，你也怪怪的

998
00:46:48,724 --> 00:46:51,018
哪裡怪？ -你有點…

999
00:46:51,102 --> 00:46:52,353
我長出人手？

1000
00:46:54,146 --> 00:46:55,731
那我現在可以彈鋼琴嗎？

1001
00:46:55,815 --> 00:46:56,649
肯定行

1002
00:47:02,488 --> 00:47:03,614
道格？

1003
00:47:04,031 --> 00:47:04,991
嘿，雷吉！

1004
00:47:05,700 --> 00:47:07,910
道格！你過得好嗎？

1005
00:47:07,994 --> 00:47:09,745
不好

1006
00:47:09,829 --> 00:47:11,038
最後來個道別刮毛

1007
00:47:11,122 --> 00:47:14,000
聽說你打算咬下我的雞雞

1008
00:47:14,083 --> 00:47:17,128
我本來想給你驚喜，誰告訴你的？

1009
00:47:18,171 --> 00:47:19,463
拍謝，爹地

1010
00:47:20,047 --> 00:47:21,549
我兒子，小矮人

1011
00:47:21,632 --> 00:47:23,134
蟲仔，我們玩完了 -蝦米？

1012
00:47:23,217 --> 00:47:24,677
我愛上別人了

1013
00:47:24,760 --> 00:47:25,595
誰？

1014
00:47:26,470 --> 00:47:27,847
要確定欸？他？

1015
00:47:27,930 --> 00:47:29,348
去操自己啦！

1016
00:47:30,224 --> 00:47:32,351
（我真的可以喔！）

1017
00:47:32,435 --> 00:47:34,020
朵朵，不要走！

1018
00:47:34,103 --> 00:47:37,231
蟲仔對天吶喊，但他有所不知…

1019
00:47:37,315 --> 00:47:38,608
去死啦，旁白狗！

1020
00:47:38,691 --> 00:47:39,650
他說到

1021
00:47:39,734 --> 00:47:41,235
不准說那句話

1022
00:47:42,612 --> 00:47:43,654
他回答到

1023
00:47:43,738 --> 00:47:46,407
雷吉，我對你抱著很大的期望

1024
00:47:47,116 --> 00:47:49,577
我只是希望你做隻乖狗狗

1025
00:47:49,660 --> 00:47:51,078
（乖狗狗）

1026
00:47:51,746 --> 00:47:53,789
我一直想做隻乖狗狗

1027
00:47:53,873 --> 00:47:55,082
再會了，雷吉

1028
00:47:57,502 --> 00:47:59,086
道格！不要走！

1029
00:48:00,171 --> 00:48:01,506
什麼味道？ -啥？

1030
00:48:02,548 --> 00:48:04,425
這裡飄出來的

1031
00:48:04,926 --> 00:48:06,761
杭特，看到沒？

1032
00:48:07,720 --> 00:48:08,721
玩具！ -玩具！

1033
00:48:08,804 --> 00:48:10,723
大家快來啊！

1034
00:48:13,100 --> 00:48:15,478
雷吉，一起扯爆它 -軟綿綿！

1035
00:48:15,561 --> 00:48:17,813
毛茸茸！ -林北要升天了

1036
00:48:18,481 --> 00:48:19,815
好多玩具喔！

1037
00:48:22,443 --> 00:48:24,820
希望今天永遠不要結束！

1038
00:48:24,904 --> 00:48:27,114
我也是！

1039
00:48:40,211 --> 00:48:42,129
大家早安，睡得好嗎？

1040
00:48:42,797 --> 00:48:44,298
靠，我以為你是朵朵

1041
00:48:44,382 --> 00:48:46,008
拍謝，來去撒尿

1042
00:48:46,717 --> 00:48:47,927
雷吉，你腳邊那是什麼？

1043
00:48:48,010 --> 00:48:50,012
腳邊？什麼東西？

1044
00:48:50,096 --> 00:48:51,639
這啥？ -對啊，這啥？

1045
00:48:51,722 --> 00:48:53,432
歐買尬，那是一隻耳朵！

1046
00:48:54,433 --> 00:48:56,394
耳朵？ -靠腰咧！

1047
00:48:56,894 --> 00:48:59,105
那不是玩具嗎？那些玩具死哪去了？

1048
00:48:59,188 --> 00:49:01,566
這不是真的…

1049
00:49:01,649 --> 00:49:04,569
是真的…歐買尬！

1050
00:49:04,652 --> 00:49:05,903
我們殺人了！

1051
00:49:05,987 --> 00:49:06,988
我要吐了！

1052
00:49:07,780 --> 00:49:09,448
靠，我吐毛出來！

1053
00:49:09,532 --> 00:49:10,366
我們殺人了！

1054
00:49:10,449 --> 00:49:11,492
救人喔！我要吐了！

1055
00:49:11,576 --> 00:49:13,369
恁娘咧！不可能！

1056
00:49:13,452 --> 00:49:15,997
撐住啊！我來救你了！

1057
00:49:16,831 --> 00:49:18,916
蟲仔，你幹嘛？ -妳說咧？

1058
00:49:19,000 --> 00:49:20,835
趕快湮滅證據，不能被人發現！

1059
00:49:29,760 --> 00:49:34,140
今天我們齊聚一堂向兔兔們道別

1060
00:49:35,057 --> 00:49:36,350
這一切真的只是意外

1061
00:49:36,434 --> 00:49:37,310
真的 -沒錯

1062
00:49:37,393 --> 00:49:40,813
要不是吃了不該吃的東西

1063
00:49:40,897 --> 00:49:44,317
我們絕不會傷害你們、凌虐你們

1064
00:49:44,400 --> 00:49:48,362
嘻嘻哈哈揮舞你們的屍塊，全是意外

1065
00:49:48,446 --> 00:49:50,072
安息吧，兔兔們

1066
00:49:50,156 --> 00:49:51,490
對不起 -安息吧

1067
00:49:51,574 --> 00:49:52,450
很抱歉 -對不起

1068
00:49:52,533 --> 00:49:53,951
阿們 -好了

1069
00:49:54,035 --> 00:49:55,828
不准再提這件事

1070
00:49:55,912 --> 00:49:58,372
聽到沒？一個字也不准提

1071
00:49:58,456 --> 00:49:59,290
不准提什麼事？

1072
00:49:59,957 --> 00:50:00,958
靠，是警犬

1073
00:50:01,042 --> 00:50:02,376
挫賽了

1074
00:50:02,460 --> 00:50:04,712
是怎樣？我們是無辜的

1075
00:50:04,795 --> 00:50:06,214
坐下！ -我坐

1076
00:50:06,297 --> 00:50:07,131
給我趴下！

1077
00:50:07,215 --> 00:50:08,466
我趴！ -狗爪伸出來！

1078
00:50:08,549 --> 00:50:10,426
趴下了！ -給我搜！

1079
00:50:10,510 --> 00:50:12,470
他們有問題 -媽啊，怎麼辦？

1080
00:50:12,553 --> 00:50:13,971
冷靜，交給我

1081
00:50:14,055 --> 00:50:15,306
我來學白狗兄講話

1082
00:50:15,389 --> 00:50:19,727
大哥你好，我們四個都沒殺過兔兔

1083
00:50:19,810 --> 00:50:22,188
蟲仔！ -什麼？通通給我閉嘴

1084
00:50:22,271 --> 00:50:23,814
我們在找一名失蹤女童軍

1085
00:50:23,898 --> 00:50:26,317
萊莉安德森，人類年齡8歲

1086
00:50:26,400 --> 00:50:28,361
兩天前自營地失蹤

1087
00:50:28,444 --> 00:50:30,363
或許你們有遇到她

1088
00:50:30,446 --> 00:50:31,614
隊長，沒發現

1089
00:50:31,697 --> 00:50:33,574
看來是沒有，走吧

1090
00:50:33,658 --> 00:50:35,576
等一下，我能幫忙

1091
00:50:35,660 --> 00:50:37,453
抱歉，我沒炫耀的意思

1092
00:50:37,537 --> 00:50:39,705
但我鼻子真的滿靈的

1093
00:50:39,789 --> 00:50:42,416
我很樂意幫你們找人

1094
00:50:42,500 --> 00:50:43,835
阿不就好棒棒

1095
00:50:43,918 --> 00:50:45,878
不用妳多事，蠢澳洲牧羊犬

1096
00:50:45,962 --> 00:50:49,006
不好意思，沒必要這麼說話吧

1097
00:50:49,090 --> 00:50:51,217
媽的你想怎樣？

1098
00:50:51,300 --> 00:50:54,512
媽的我不想怎樣，我坐下了

1099
00:50:54,595 --> 00:50:55,721
杭特啊

1100
00:50:56,389 --> 00:50:58,516
杭特？ -羅夫？

1101
00:50:58,599 --> 00:51:01,936
他奶奶的咧！

1102
00:51:02,019 --> 00:51:03,437
你戴頭套我沒認出來！

1103
00:51:03,521 --> 00:51:05,064
對啊，我現在是頭套哥

1104
00:51:05,147 --> 00:51:07,650
過來蹭一下！ -哥們！

1105
00:51:07,733 --> 00:51:08,901
尬的，我竟然沒發現

1106
00:51:08,985 --> 00:51:11,445
你的屁眼還是老味道

1107
00:51:11,529 --> 00:51:12,738
不可能忘記這屁眼吧

1108
00:51:12,822 --> 00:51:14,532
搞屁喔？ -你認識這傢伙？

1109
00:51:14,615 --> 00:51:17,702
別逗了，他是我警校學長

1110
00:51:17,785 --> 00:51:19,954
這狗娘養的教了我好多

1111
00:51:20,037 --> 00:51:21,581
{\an8}我們都是狗娘養的，隊長

1112
00:51:21,664 --> 00:51:23,791
{\an8}閉嘴，你後來被派去哪？

1113
00:51:23,875 --> 00:51:26,502
{\an8}緝毒？偵爆？哪裡？

1114
00:51:27,461 --> 00:51:29,839
我照顧垂死人類

1115
00:51:31,465 --> 00:51:32,884
也不算世界末日啦

1116
00:51:33,593 --> 00:51:34,802
對他們來說是

1117
00:51:34,886 --> 00:51:36,429
嘿，狗狗

1118
00:51:36,512 --> 00:51:40,016
發現流浪狗啦，羅夫，好棒

1119
00:51:40,099 --> 00:51:41,809
話說你們在這裡幹嘛？

1120
00:51:42,518 --> 00:51:45,104
說來話長 -我們要去咬某人的雞雞

1121
00:51:45,188 --> 00:51:46,314
一秒就說完

1122
00:51:46,397 --> 00:51:49,567
水喔！想當年雞雞咬到爽都沒事

1123
00:51:49,650 --> 00:51:53,154
現在隨便碰一下就得寫兩禮拜報告

1124
00:51:53,237 --> 00:51:56,157
麻煩派一組人來老森林路54號

1125
00:51:56,240 --> 00:51:57,950
我們在找空中魔鬼

1126
00:51:58,034 --> 00:51:58,951
你有印象嗎？

1127
00:51:59,035 --> 00:52:00,870
空中魔鬼？有啊 -謝謝

1128
00:52:00,953 --> 00:52:02,538
跟我們走，帶你們去

1129
00:52:02,622 --> 00:52:04,790
這麼好？ -那當然

1130
00:52:06,083 --> 00:52:08,169
要常約啦

1131
00:52:08,252 --> 00:52:10,046
7年沒見了吧？ -1年而已啦

1132
00:52:10,129 --> 00:52:12,381
不過也是啦，人類1年差不多我們7年

1133
00:52:12,465 --> 00:52:14,175
我們就這麼說

1134
00:52:14,258 --> 00:52:15,843
有隻負鼠殺了那堆兔兔

1135
00:52:15,927 --> 00:52:17,553
瞭嗎？ -負鼠要叫什麼名字？

1136
00:52:17,637 --> 00:52:18,513
格雷

1137
00:52:18,596 --> 00:52:22,350
也太假了吧，可以叫蒙蒙嗎？

1138
00:52:22,433 --> 00:52:25,186
凱絲 -史蒂夫，感謝跑一趟

1139
00:52:25,770 --> 00:52:27,355
小傢伙，要不要吃點心？

1140
00:52:27,438 --> 00:52:28,981
我最愛點心了！

1141
00:52:29,065 --> 00:52:31,817
有人想吃點心啊？

1142
00:52:31,901 --> 00:52:33,528
來吧，我還有一大堆

1143
00:52:33,611 --> 00:52:34,987
雷吉，有詐！

1144
00:52:36,739 --> 00:52:37,740
不要！

1145
00:52:37,823 --> 00:52:39,742
我們發現時，那些兔兔已經死了

1146
00:52:39,825 --> 00:52:41,827
是負鼠幹的，他叫格雷…

1147
00:52:41,911 --> 00:52:42,828
蒙蒙！ -杭特！

1148
00:52:42,912 --> 00:52:44,413
他叫蒙蒙，不是格雷

1149
00:52:44,497 --> 00:52:46,082
我們是被逼的！

1150
00:52:46,165 --> 00:52:48,251
羅夫，我們不是好哥們嗎？

1151
00:52:48,334 --> 00:52:51,045
拍謝啦，職責所在，你懂的

1152
00:52:51,128 --> 00:52:53,005
死沒天良的

1153
00:52:53,089 --> 00:52:55,967
冷靜，小可愛，安啦

1154
00:52:56,050 --> 00:52:57,760
你們有名牌，送回家而已

1155
00:52:57,844 --> 00:52:58,803
{\an8}（動物管制）

1156
00:53:01,055 --> 00:53:03,516
新貨色 -愛死那櫻桃小嘴了

1157
00:53:04,016 --> 00:53:05,268
哥哥會好好照顧你

1158
00:53:05,351 --> 00:53:07,478
小賤貨！照過來！

1159
00:53:08,312 --> 00:53:11,232
我們要趕快逃出去，時間不多了

1160
00:53:11,315 --> 00:53:13,192
這裡是哪裡？ -沒事的

1161
00:53:13,276 --> 00:53:15,278
不行，不能待在這裡

1162
00:53:15,361 --> 00:53:17,530
別又來了 -蟲仔，沒事的

1163
00:53:17,613 --> 00:53:20,575
對啊，羅夫說我們會被送回家，安啦

1164
00:53:20,658 --> 00:53:22,869
那也要有家可以回

1165
00:53:22,952 --> 00:53:26,747
知道流浪狗會被送去哪嗎，杭特？

1166
00:53:26,831 --> 00:53:29,041
知道我會有什麼下場

1167
00:53:29,125 --> 00:53:30,376
雷吉會有什麼下場嗎？

1168
00:53:30,459 --> 00:53:32,336
蟲仔，冷靜，會有辦法的

1169
00:53:32,420 --> 00:53:33,504
沒辦法了，瑪姬

1170
00:53:33,588 --> 00:53:35,798
被這些人類抓住，我們徹底GG了

1171
00:53:35,882 --> 00:53:37,258
你又不知道

1172
00:53:37,341 --> 00:53:38,926
對啊，蟲仔

1173
00:53:39,010 --> 00:53:42,221
你說你很了解人類，但你跟人類又不熟

1174
00:53:42,305 --> 00:53:43,723
你從來就沒有主人

1175
00:53:43,806 --> 00:53:46,142
你沒有珍娜，你沒有道格

1176
00:53:46,225 --> 00:53:47,185
我有艾瑪！

1177
00:53:47,977 --> 00:53:48,936
什麼？

1178
00:53:49,645 --> 00:53:51,480
蟲仔，你以前有主人？

1179
00:53:52,148 --> 00:53:53,399
對

1180
00:53:53,482 --> 00:53:57,737
我告訴自己絕不再提起她的名字

1181
00:53:58,571 --> 00:53:59,989
但聽聽我的故事吧

1182
00:54:00,615 --> 00:54:02,200
不要 -不要？好吧

1183
00:54:02,283 --> 00:54:03,409
細節我記不清了

1184
00:54:03,492 --> 00:54:05,995
但我記得她把我帶回家那天

1185
00:54:07,788 --> 00:54:09,498
這隻 -好可愛的小傢伙

1186
00:54:10,124 --> 00:54:11,918
好可愛的小蟲仔

1187
00:54:13,586 --> 00:54:15,421
我們一起做好多事

1188
00:54:15,505 --> 00:54:19,091
整天在一起玩，不管我多白痴

1189
00:54:19,175 --> 00:54:21,052
她都笑咪咪的

1190
00:54:21,511 --> 00:54:24,305
不給糖就搗蛋 -還會做我討厭的事

1191
00:54:24,388 --> 00:54:27,099
我們會穿上超北爛的衣服

1192
00:54:27,183 --> 00:54:30,228
跟鄰居要狗大便做成的巧克力

1193
00:54:30,311 --> 00:54:31,479
不是給你的，狗狗

1194
00:54:32,730 --> 00:54:34,690
不怕，刮風下雨而已

1195
00:54:35,316 --> 00:54:37,276
但那時最幸福的是

1196
00:54:37,360 --> 00:54:38,528
她帶給我的感覺

1197
00:54:39,070 --> 00:54:40,404
我愛你

1198
00:54:40,488 --> 00:54:43,282
每當她這麼說，我都覺得自己好特別

1199
00:54:43,658 --> 00:54:47,411
說完通常就會來個爽歪歪的搔肚肚

1200
00:54:47,495 --> 00:54:49,789
沒人能讓我的小狗腿踢得這麼嗨

1201
00:54:49,872 --> 00:54:52,458
除了那晚那隻浣熊，我不想多談

1202
00:54:52,542 --> 00:54:54,085
總之就是這樣

1203
00:54:55,378 --> 00:54:58,047
但後來…我犯了一個錯

1204
00:55:01,008 --> 00:55:02,301
我當時腦子一片空白

1205
00:55:03,845 --> 00:55:06,764
我還搞不清楚狀況，一切就回不去了

1206
00:55:06,848 --> 00:55:08,432
跟蟲仔說再見？

1207
00:55:16,399 --> 00:55:18,901
我以為只是被處罰之類的

1208
00:55:20,987 --> 00:55:22,822
但她送我去的地方…

1209
00:55:23,781 --> 00:55:25,908
處罰永遠不會結束

1210
00:55:34,000 --> 00:55:35,585
我後來再也沒見過她

1211
00:55:35,668 --> 00:55:37,545
我們一起經歷了那麼多

1212
00:55:37,628 --> 00:55:42,758
我們帶給彼此那麼多歡笑、淚水和感動

1213
00:55:42,842 --> 00:55:44,886
全都是屁

1214
00:55:44,969 --> 00:55:48,723
我們一起做了好多，她教了我好多把戲

1215
00:55:48,806 --> 00:55:53,311
但她就是不要我學會…留下來

1216
00:55:54,937 --> 00:55:56,689
剛講到中間我恍神了

1217
00:55:56,772 --> 00:55:57,732
中間可以再講一遍嗎？

1218
00:55:57,815 --> 00:56:00,193
杭特，別肖想我會再講一遍

1219
00:56:00,276 --> 00:56:02,028
很抱歉，蟲仔，我不知道

1220
00:56:02,111 --> 00:56:04,197
不用抱歉，雷吉，要感恩

1221
00:56:04,280 --> 00:56:06,240
你有機會給他難看

1222
00:56:06,324 --> 00:56:10,411
我多想咬爆那女的雞雞啊

1223
00:56:10,494 --> 00:56:13,331
不過她才6歲，現在也不知道住哪

1224
00:56:13,414 --> 00:56:15,708
而且她是女的，根本沒雞雞

1225
00:56:15,791 --> 00:56:18,920
聽著，我們這麼做不只為了報復道格

1226
00:56:19,003 --> 00:56:20,963
而是為了報復千千萬萬個道格

1227
00:56:21,047 --> 00:56:26,010
報復每一個把我們當屁的人類

1228
00:56:26,093 --> 00:56:28,679
靠，我狗生最大的錯誤

1229
00:56:28,763 --> 00:56:31,057
真的，要是我也會後悔咬那一口

1230
00:56:31,140 --> 00:56:34,185
咬那一口？不是，我說的是她

1231
00:56:34,268 --> 00:56:36,062
該死的是她，不是…

1232
00:56:36,145 --> 00:56:39,232
好了，想怎麼報復你前任都行

1233
00:56:39,315 --> 00:56:41,275
但前提是要先逃出這裡

1234
00:56:41,359 --> 00:56:44,529
你各位，想辦法弄到鑰匙如何？

1235
00:56:52,578 --> 00:56:55,831
不妙，需要一根超長棒棒才勾得到

1236
00:56:59,293 --> 00:57:01,212
大家幹嘛都看著我？

1237
00:57:05,383 --> 00:57:07,009
來吧，杭特，你可以的

1238
00:57:09,011 --> 00:57:11,556
快碰到了，再一點點

1239
00:57:11,639 --> 00:57:13,391
加油，再浪一點！你可以的！

1240
00:57:13,474 --> 00:57:14,892
這是我的極限了

1241
00:57:14,976 --> 00:57:16,936
瑪姬，上啊，撩爆他

1242
00:57:17,937 --> 00:57:24,360
杭特，這趟旅程好長、好硬

1243
00:57:24,443 --> 00:57:29,866
想到我們從後面來的畫面，我就…

1244
00:57:30,575 --> 00:57:31,993
瘋狂嬌喘

1245
00:57:32,076 --> 00:57:33,828
靠北！有反應

1246
00:57:33,911 --> 00:57:35,830
再來，瑪姬，再騷一點

1247
00:57:35,913 --> 00:57:40,418
想像一下，我的8個雪乳猛烈晃動

1248
00:57:40,501 --> 00:57:42,920
我的身上只套著…

1249
00:57:43,504 --> 00:57:44,672
頭套

1250
00:57:46,924 --> 00:57:48,050
快到了，杭特

1251
00:57:48,134 --> 00:57:50,928
衝啊，杭特，用力衝

1252
00:57:51,387 --> 00:57:52,555
就是這樣，杭特！

1253
00:57:53,014 --> 00:57:55,224
杭特…

1254
00:57:55,308 --> 00:57:58,311
杭特…

1255
00:58:02,023 --> 00:58:03,316
杭特！

1256
00:58:03,399 --> 00:58:06,444
拍謝，我不行了 -真是

1257
00:58:06,527 --> 00:58:08,279
媽的，搞得跟真的一樣

1258
00:58:08,905 --> 00:58:10,406
抱歉老二害你們失望了

1259
00:58:10,489 --> 00:58:12,200
等等，我想到了

1260
00:58:12,283 --> 00:58:14,452
人類超迷戀什麼東西？

1261
00:58:15,119 --> 00:58:16,495
他們自己 -畫自己的臉

1262
00:58:16,579 --> 00:58:18,915
去死 -不對，蟲仔，你說過的

1263
00:58:18,998 --> 00:58:22,668
人類超迷戀狗狗的什麼東西？

1264
00:58:22,752 --> 00:58:24,504
狗大便！ -正解！

1265
00:58:24,587 --> 00:58:26,881
我們一大便，人類會幹嘛？

1266
00:58:26,964 --> 00:58:28,090
拿袋子裝起來 -對欸

1267
00:58:28,174 --> 00:58:30,885
沒錯，這裡如果一堆大便

1268
00:58:30,968 --> 00:58:34,680
鏟屎官就會進來撿，像在收集什麼寶貝

1269
00:58:34,764 --> 00:58:37,642
就是這個，通往自由的門票

1270
00:58:37,725 --> 00:58:40,186
我們把這裡便好便滿，逼他開門

1271
00:58:40,269 --> 00:58:42,230
等門一開，我們說了算！

1272
00:58:42,313 --> 00:58:43,940
讚啦 -水喔，來拉吧！

1273
00:58:44,023 --> 00:58:45,399
林北肚子積了一堆屎

1274
00:58:47,652 --> 00:58:48,528
先不要

1275
00:58:48,611 --> 00:58:50,780
怎麼了？你們不想出去嗎？

1276
00:58:50,863 --> 00:58:53,574
當然想，但我們失望太多次

1277
00:58:53,658 --> 00:58:56,452
不敢再肖想能翻越這些高牆

1278
00:58:56,536 --> 00:58:58,329
除非被收養

1279
00:58:59,580 --> 00:59:01,999
聽著，我懂

1280
00:59:02,083 --> 00:59:05,628
我也有過黑暗時刻，覺得自己被困住了

1281
00:59:06,546 --> 00:59:09,006
雖然肉眼看不到

1282
00:59:09,090 --> 00:59:12,343
卻彷彿有道高牆或柵欄，將你團團包圍

1283
00:59:12,426 --> 00:59:14,804
沒錯，魔法隱形柵欄，真有這玩意

1284
00:59:14,887 --> 00:59:18,391
但我要告訴大家，那全是垃圾話

1285
00:59:18,474 --> 00:59:21,018
我很幸運認識幾個超屌的麻吉

1286
00:59:21,102 --> 00:59:23,938
他們讓我明白，在那高牆之外

1287
00:59:24,021 --> 00:59:26,691
還有更瞎趴的世界等著我們

1288
00:59:26,774 --> 00:59:28,526
有路燈可以撒尿

1289
00:59:28,609 --> 00:59:31,571
有比薩可以狂嗑，有沙發可以愛愛

1290
00:59:31,654 --> 00:59:33,531
有死兔可以…

1291
00:59:33,614 --> 00:59:35,992
我什麼都不知道 -我也是

1292
00:59:36,075 --> 00:59:38,661
聽不懂 -有球球可以玩，有…

1293
00:59:38,744 --> 00:59:39,787
有雞雞可以咬！

1294
00:59:39,871 --> 00:59:41,831
蛤？對啦，還有那個

1295
00:59:43,040 --> 00:59:46,836
重點是，外面有更瞎趴的狗生等著我們

1296
00:59:47,461 --> 00:59:48,379
水啦！ -雷吉！

1297
00:59:48,462 --> 00:59:52,466
我現在就問各位，是要留下來等死

1298
00:59:52,550 --> 00:59:56,137
還是烙賽烙到脫肛活下去？

1299
00:59:56,220 --> 00:59:59,182
活下去！活下去！

1300
00:59:59,265 --> 01:00:03,144
跟我一起噴屎吧！為自由而烙賽吧！

1301
01:00:13,946 --> 01:00:17,074
用力！挖掘最深處的宿便！

1302
01:00:17,909 --> 01:00:19,994
解放被壓抑的屁眼！

1303
01:00:21,037 --> 01:00:22,163
出來吧

1304
01:00:28,669 --> 01:00:31,380
幹得好！繼續拉！

1305
01:00:46,938 --> 01:00:48,564
我的眼睛就長這樣

1306
01:00:49,607 --> 01:00:50,691
很好

1307
01:00:51,609 --> 01:00:53,486
老爸一定愛死了

1308
01:01:00,660 --> 01:01:02,662
有動靜了，各就各位

1309
01:01:11,921 --> 01:01:14,590
靠腰，有夠噁爛

1310
01:01:19,679 --> 01:01:21,264
搞屁

1311
01:01:25,101 --> 01:01:26,143
挫賽

1312
01:01:42,243 --> 01:01:44,996
搞笑，很搞笑

1313
01:01:46,163 --> 01:01:47,290
我知道是怎樣

1314
01:01:47,373 --> 01:01:51,127
你們覺得

1315
01:01:52,211 --> 01:01:54,589
我他媽是個大混蛋，對吧？

1316
01:01:54,672 --> 01:01:56,048
你們了解我的一切

1317
01:01:56,132 --> 01:01:59,177
了解我人生發生的所有事

1318
01:01:59,260 --> 01:02:01,762
我老爸和我前妻的事

1319
01:02:07,852 --> 01:02:10,813
好棒棒！好棒棒！

1320
01:02:10,897 --> 01:02:11,898
安可啦！

1321
01:02:11,981 --> 01:02:14,483
說笑的！夠了！

1322
01:02:14,942 --> 01:02:17,528
老子受夠了！

1323
01:02:18,237 --> 01:02:20,531
是怎樣…歐買尬

1324
01:02:23,576 --> 01:02:24,410
行動！

1325
01:02:37,215 --> 01:02:38,591
成功了！

1326
01:02:38,674 --> 01:02:40,301
真的是烙好烙滿！

1327
01:02:40,384 --> 01:02:42,094
萬歲！萬歲！

1328
01:02:42,178 --> 01:02:43,888
通通去死啦！

1329
01:02:53,564 --> 01:02:55,483
感謝各位耐心等候

1330
01:02:58,528 --> 01:02:59,862
拍謝，黛安

1331
01:03:03,115 --> 01:03:06,536
“為自由而烙賽吧！”超北爛，我喜歡

1332
01:03:06,619 --> 01:03:08,663
好厲害，超會講，雷吉

1333
01:03:08,746 --> 01:03:10,915
但我比較喜歡之前講的

1334
01:03:10,998 --> 01:03:13,835
就是你說服我們上路那次

1335
01:03:13,918 --> 01:03:16,629
那時你一心只想咬下道格雞雞

1336
01:03:16,712 --> 01:03:18,506
蟲仔 -蟲仔，聽我說

1337
01:03:20,007 --> 01:03:22,677
你們看！空中魔鬼！找到了！

1338
01:03:22,760 --> 01:03:24,178
看看那張屎臉！

1339
01:03:24,262 --> 01:03:25,388
（風雨無阻 使命必達）

1340
01:03:25,471 --> 01:03:26,973
下地獄去，噁笑狂魔

1341
01:03:27,056 --> 01:03:28,140
討厭鬼

1342
01:03:28,224 --> 01:03:29,600
笑屁笑，咬爛你褲子

1343
01:03:29,684 --> 01:03:31,978
我要當你面扯爆你蛋蛋！

1344
01:03:32,061 --> 01:03:33,521
蠢帽配蠢車

1345
01:03:33,604 --> 01:03:36,023
車屁股還有門

1346
01:03:36,107 --> 01:03:38,192
操你那屎臉 -咬到你叫媽媽

1347
01:03:38,276 --> 01:03:39,777
操你那醜包、那醜衣

1348
01:03:39,861 --> 01:03:43,114
身上一堆怪味，這人不能信！

1349
01:03:44,448 --> 01:03:46,868
總之呢，太棒了，最後地標

1350
01:03:46,951 --> 01:03:48,160
對耶 -進度剛好

1351
01:03:48,244 --> 01:03:49,412
最好是啦

1352
01:03:49,495 --> 01:03:52,582
記得接下來怎麼走嗎？ -就…

1353
01:03:52,665 --> 01:03:54,500
就先沿著這條路走

1354
01:03:54,584 --> 01:03:55,459
很好，走吧

1355
01:03:55,543 --> 01:03:56,502
好喔 -好的

1356
01:03:56,586 --> 01:03:59,172
等一下，還不能走

1357
01:03:59,714 --> 01:04:00,548
怎麼了？

1358
01:04:01,090 --> 01:04:03,301
哪去了？在這裡

1359
01:04:05,219 --> 01:04:06,929
好了，走吧

1360
01:04:07,013 --> 01:04:08,931
不行，等一下

1361
01:04:09,015 --> 01:04:11,058
你幹嘛一定要帶著那顆球？

1362
01:04:11,767 --> 01:04:13,895
人家就愛球球咩

1363
01:04:13,978 --> 01:04:16,105
我看過愛球的狗，你不是那種狗

1364
01:04:16,189 --> 01:04:18,232
你又不了解我

1365
01:04:18,316 --> 01:04:21,027
我現在稍微了解了

1366
01:04:21,110 --> 01:04:22,445
把球放下，雷吉

1367
01:04:22,528 --> 01:04:24,030
什麼？不要

1368
01:04:24,113 --> 01:04:26,115
把球給我放下

1369
01:04:26,199 --> 01:04:28,951
放下 -我不要！

1370
01:04:29,035 --> 01:04:30,453
放下！ -不要

1371
01:04:30,536 --> 01:04:31,579
媽的把球給我放下！

1372
01:04:31,662 --> 01:04:33,164
不要 -你根本不愛球！

1373
01:04:33,247 --> 01:04:34,832
道格愛！

1374
01:04:34,916 --> 01:04:36,250
道格？

1375
01:04:36,334 --> 01:04:37,668
雷吉啊

1376
01:04:37,752 --> 01:04:39,378
我不知道原因，但他就是愛

1377
01:04:39,462 --> 01:04:42,256
我們每次玩你丟我撿

1378
01:04:42,340 --> 01:04:44,592
我把球撿回家，遊戲就結束了

1379
01:04:44,675 --> 01:04:47,136
我知道他很期待，我不想讓他失望

1380
01:04:47,220 --> 01:04:48,262
媽的咧

1381
01:04:48,346 --> 01:04:51,974
所以你說不知道該怎麼咬下道格雞雞

1382
01:04:52,058 --> 01:04:54,352
真正的原因是…

1383
01:04:54,435 --> 01:04:56,604
你根本沒打算咬下他的雞雞

1384
01:04:56,687 --> 01:05:00,691
一開始我是真心打算這麼做

1385
01:05:00,775 --> 01:05:05,279
但越接近道格，我越發現我好想他

1386
01:05:06,239 --> 01:05:09,075
他應該也很想我 -雷吉，別執著了

1387
01:05:09,158 --> 01:05:10,910
你值得更好的

1388
01:05:10,993 --> 01:05:13,829
沒有，沒這回事

1389
01:05:13,913 --> 01:05:15,498
知道道格為什麼拋棄我嗎？

1390
01:05:15,581 --> 01:05:17,792
因為問題出在我身上

1391
01:05:17,875 --> 01:05:19,168
我亂咬他的鞋子

1392
01:05:19,252 --> 01:05:22,463
我因為想尿尿一大早就把他叫醒

1393
01:05:22,547 --> 01:05:23,923
我還在地毯上拉屎

1394
01:05:24,006 --> 01:05:25,925
我們都會在地毯上拉屎啊

1395
01:05:26,008 --> 01:05:28,636
那你們會滾屎嗎？

1396
01:05:28,719 --> 01:05:30,930
知道嗎？我超愛滾屎的

1397
01:05:31,013 --> 01:05:32,390
好吧，的確超母湯

1398
01:05:32,473 --> 01:05:34,976
天哪，我竟然現在才看清

1399
01:05:35,059 --> 01:05:38,813
他罵我是大爛狗，一點也沒錯

1400
01:05:38,896 --> 01:05:40,273
一切都是我的錯

1401
01:05:40,898 --> 01:05:42,984
我不會再當大爛狗了

1402
01:05:43,067 --> 01:05:44,652
我要開始當一隻乖狗狗

1403
01:05:44,735 --> 01:05:48,781
不敢相信我竟然為這混蛋拼命

1404
01:05:48,865 --> 01:05:51,617
只是把他送回另一個混蛋手裡

1405
01:05:51,701 --> 01:05:54,203
我為了你拚了老命，雷吉

1406
01:05:54,287 --> 01:05:55,580
才不是為了我

1407
01:05:55,663 --> 01:05:57,874
你自己說的，不只為了報復道格

1408
01:05:57,957 --> 01:06:01,836
而是為了報復每一個把我們當屁的人類

1409
01:06:01,919 --> 01:06:03,963
你是為了報復艾瑪！ -雷吉…

1410
01:06:04,046 --> 01:06:04,881
我操

1411
01:06:04,964 --> 01:06:07,049
規則三怎麼說的？

1412
01:06:07,133 --> 01:06:09,594
一切靠自己？那我們在幹嘛？

1413
01:06:09,677 --> 01:06:11,596
你根本不想當流浪狗吧

1414
01:06:11,679 --> 01:06:14,307
你既悲傷又孤單 -聽他在屁

1415
01:06:14,390 --> 01:06:16,934
你說討厭人類根本就是因為

1416
01:06:17,018 --> 01:06:19,562
如果你靜下來認真思考

1417
01:06:19,645 --> 01:06:23,065
就會驚覺搞砸的不是艾瑪，是你

1418
01:06:23,149 --> 01:06:24,609
他媽的給我滾一邊去

1419
01:06:24,692 --> 01:06:26,694
相信我，我自己也搞砸了

1420
01:06:26,777 --> 01:06:29,488
謝謝你讓我看清問題出在我身上

1421
01:06:29,572 --> 01:06:34,160
但我還有機會補救，不會落得你這下場

1422
01:06:35,786 --> 01:06:37,371
拿來！ -幹嘛？

1423
01:06:37,455 --> 01:06:38,831
住手！別打了！

1424
01:06:38,915 --> 01:06:40,541
把這爛東西給我！

1425
01:06:40,625 --> 01:06:41,751
還我！ -蟲仔！

1426
01:06:41,834 --> 01:06:44,045
那是道格給我的！還我！ -我知道！

1427
01:06:44,670 --> 01:06:46,130
不要！ -住手！

1428
01:06:46,214 --> 01:06:47,465
蟲仔，別這樣

1429
01:06:47,548 --> 01:06:50,259
這就是我對你和你主人的看法

1430
01:06:50,343 --> 01:06:53,221
去死吧，雷吉，你活該有這種主人

1431
01:07:01,771 --> 01:07:04,106
雷吉，別回去！ -雷吉！

1432
01:07:04,190 --> 01:07:05,942
希望他已經閃人了！

1433
01:07:11,572 --> 01:07:16,202
討厭，我真以為我的老二能勾到鑰匙

1434
01:07:18,329 --> 01:07:20,581
不過這也很討厭啦

1435
01:07:25,503 --> 01:07:29,215
（歡迎來到奧克伍德）

1436
01:07:30,132 --> 01:07:31,509
蟲仔，不能就這樣回去

1437
01:07:31,592 --> 01:07:35,388
安啦，空中魔鬼、超大頭套、倉鼠滾輪

1438
01:07:35,471 --> 01:07:38,599
順原路回去就好，這次不要死兔兔

1439
01:07:38,683 --> 01:07:40,726
她是說不能丟下他不管

1440
01:07:40,810 --> 01:07:44,105
首先，我們沒丟下他，是他丟下我們

1441
01:07:44,188 --> 01:07:47,650
再來，我們不知道道格家怎麼走

1442
01:07:47,733 --> 01:07:49,986
第三，林北才不要沒事瞎晃

1443
01:07:50,069 --> 01:07:53,656
讓某隻沒懶趴的鳥趁我不在偷襲我馬子

1444
01:07:53,739 --> 01:07:54,740
什麼鬼？

1445
01:07:55,032 --> 01:07:57,493
那混蛋倒是說中了一點

1446
01:07:57,577 --> 01:08:00,705
我浪費太多時間跟你們鬼混

1447
01:08:00,788 --> 01:08:03,249
我是流浪狗，我要去流浪了

1448
01:08:03,332 --> 01:08:04,292
等等，你要去哪？

1449
01:08:04,375 --> 01:08:06,002
不知道，青菜啦

1450
01:08:06,085 --> 01:08:07,295
什麼意思？

1451
01:08:07,378 --> 01:08:08,838
關你屁事

1452
01:08:08,921 --> 01:08:10,965
哎呀，被騙到了

1453
01:08:11,549 --> 01:08:12,925
回家吧，杭特

1454
01:08:17,013 --> 01:08:19,055
說我孤單，說我害怕

1455
01:08:19,140 --> 01:08:20,558
聽你在叭噗啦

1456
01:08:21,475 --> 01:08:24,604
告訴你，我不孤單，也不害怕

1457
01:08:25,229 --> 01:08:26,063
媽的死葉子！

1458
01:08:26,981 --> 01:08:28,107
落得我這下場？

1459
01:08:28,191 --> 01:08:30,651
我上禮拜尿了兩台車、三棟房

1460
01:08:30,734 --> 01:08:33,738
沒錯，我今年三歲，已經有房了

1461
01:08:33,821 --> 01:08:36,782
我過著夢幻生活，孤單是啥？能吃嗎？

1462
01:08:36,866 --> 01:08:39,035
林北沒在怕的啦

1463
01:08:40,286 --> 01:08:41,203
什麼人？

1464
01:08:42,287 --> 01:08:43,288
別過來！

1465
01:08:44,165 --> 01:08:45,457
我是肖欸！我愛操垃圾！

1466
01:09:01,390 --> 01:09:04,519
不行，不可以，走開，蟲仔

1467
01:09:04,602 --> 01:09:07,438
像艾瑪那種小女生爛死了

1468
01:09:13,736 --> 01:09:16,238
不要聽，不准聽

1469
01:09:16,322 --> 01:09:19,575
又一個自戀鬼，自我中心、把你當屁

1470
01:09:19,658 --> 01:09:22,870
你吃過大虧了，就…

1471
01:09:24,162 --> 01:09:25,247
他奶奶的

1472
01:09:33,339 --> 01:09:34,756
嘿，狗狗

1473
01:09:34,841 --> 01:09:37,385
你怎麼一個人在這裡？

1474
01:09:38,176 --> 01:09:39,845
跟我一樣迷路了嗎？

1475
01:09:39,929 --> 01:09:41,055
沒關係

1476
01:09:41,138 --> 01:09:42,098
哇靠！

1477
01:09:42,180 --> 01:09:43,558
妳就是大家在找的那個女生

1478
01:09:44,100 --> 01:09:44,934
太神了！

1479
01:09:45,685 --> 01:09:48,770
我找到她了！來人啊！

1480
01:09:48,854 --> 01:09:50,147
我找到那女生了！

1481
01:09:50,231 --> 01:09:51,064
蟲仔的聲音！

1482
01:09:51,148 --> 01:09:52,608
蟲仔，你在哪？

1483
01:09:52,692 --> 01:09:53,693
走！

1484
01:09:57,738 --> 01:09:58,573
我看到他了！

1485
01:10:00,157 --> 01:10:01,450
你竟然找到那女生

1486
01:10:01,534 --> 01:10:02,368
天哪，蟲仔！

1487
01:10:02,451 --> 01:10:04,287
要趕快找人來幫忙，她狀態很差

1488
01:10:05,204 --> 01:10:08,082
救命！這裡！ -找到她了！救命！

1489
01:10:08,165 --> 01:10:09,750
救命！ -羅夫！你這豬頭！

1490
01:10:09,834 --> 01:10:10,751
救命！救命！

1491
01:10:12,920 --> 01:10:14,213
救命！

1492
01:10:14,297 --> 01:10:15,965
失蹤女童！走！

1493
01:10:16,048 --> 01:10:17,133
這裡！ -救命！

1494
01:10:17,216 --> 01:10:18,384
他們來了 -在這裡！

1495
01:10:18,467 --> 01:10:20,511
曼仔，確認一下

1496
01:10:20,595 --> 01:10:22,972
幹得好，杭特、小狗們

1497
01:10:23,055 --> 01:10:24,891
有兩把刷子嘛 -天哪，萊莉！

1498
01:10:25,975 --> 01:10:27,310
終於找到妳了

1499
01:10:27,393 --> 01:10:29,478
狗狗好棒，沒事了

1500
01:10:29,562 --> 01:10:32,815
我不會問你們怎麼跑出來的

1501
01:10:32,899 --> 01:10:35,693
就問一句，該怎麼報答你們？

1502
01:10:37,403 --> 01:10:39,322
幫忙救救我的好麻吉

1503
01:10:42,366 --> 01:10:44,869
該說什麼才好呢…

1504
01:10:44,952 --> 01:10:47,163
好，來練習一下好了

1505
01:10:47,705 --> 01:10:48,706
嘿，道格

1506
01:10:48,789 --> 01:10:49,957
嘿，廢渣

1507
01:10:50,041 --> 01:10:51,209
最近都在幹嘛？

1508
01:10:51,292 --> 01:10:52,376
{\an8}跟雞雞玩

1509
01:10:53,294 --> 01:10:55,129
酷喔，果然是道格

1510
01:10:55,213 --> 01:10:57,006
我欠你一個道歉

1511
01:10:57,089 --> 01:10:58,299
好喔

1512
01:10:58,382 --> 01:11:00,718
你把我丟掉完全沒有錯

1513
01:11:00,801 --> 01:11:02,261
是我太糟糕了

1514
01:11:02,345 --> 01:11:03,596
{\an8}沒錯

1515
01:11:03,679 --> 01:11:08,601
但我在想我回來後能不能做些改變？

1516
01:11:08,684 --> 01:11:10,853
或許我們可以去散散步

1517
01:11:10,937 --> 01:11:13,731
增加尿尿時間，一天兩次？

1518
01:11:13,814 --> 01:11:18,653
可以的話，偶爾叫我一聲乖狗狗？

1519
01:11:24,408 --> 01:11:25,576
蠢斃了

1520
01:11:29,622 --> 01:11:31,290
什麼叫找不到他？

1521
01:11:31,374 --> 01:11:32,500
嗅探犬不就最會找東西？

1522
01:11:32,583 --> 01:11:34,502
對啊，羅夫，我們受過訓練

1523
01:11:34,585 --> 01:11:37,547
不可能，要知道他的氣味才能追蹤他

1524
01:11:37,630 --> 01:11:39,340
你昨天有聞到他的氣味嗎？

1525
01:11:39,423 --> 01:11:40,800
印象中沒有，隊長

1526
01:11:40,883 --> 01:11:42,009
等等！那條領巾！

1527
01:11:42,093 --> 01:11:42,927
又來？

1528
01:11:43,010 --> 01:11:45,388
那條領巾會有他的氣味，走！

1529
01:11:45,471 --> 01:11:46,597
漂亮，瑪姬

1530
01:11:46,681 --> 01:11:47,807
羅夫？

1531
01:11:47,890 --> 01:11:48,766
羅夫！

1532
01:11:49,267 --> 01:11:50,226
在那裡！ -找到了！

1533
01:11:50,309 --> 01:11:51,644
找到了！

1534
01:11:53,104 --> 01:11:54,146
靠妳了，瑪姬

1535
01:11:54,689 --> 01:11:55,690
站住！

1536
01:11:55,773 --> 01:11:57,817
靠北，什麼鬼味道？

1537
01:11:57,900 --> 01:11:59,318
聞得出雷吉的氣味嗎？

1538
01:12:00,820 --> 01:12:03,114
隊長，完全聞不出狗味，只有尿味

1539
01:12:04,866 --> 01:12:06,284
怪了 -是蟲仔味

1540
01:12:06,367 --> 01:12:09,871
從尿漬研判，這泡尿細小微弱

1541
01:12:09,954 --> 01:12:12,832
可見這隻狗的雞雞小到不行

1542
01:12:12,915 --> 01:12:13,791
就是蟲仔

1543
01:12:13,875 --> 01:12:15,251
聽你在放狗屁

1544
01:12:15,334 --> 01:12:17,545
就算看得出什麼，也是一根

1545
01:12:17,628 --> 01:12:20,464
性感精壯、實力取勝的雞雞

1546
01:12:20,548 --> 01:12:22,967
{\an8}上面都是小雞雞的尿味

1547
01:12:23,050 --> 01:12:25,386
{\an8}奇蹟出現才有可能聞出狗味

1548
01:12:25,469 --> 01:12:27,722
你們跑來這裡做什麼？

1549
01:12:28,848 --> 01:12:30,850
妳幹嘛？妳會汙染氣味

1550
01:12:31,434 --> 01:12:34,145
我在做你的工作，閃邊去，希特勒

1551
01:12:34,562 --> 01:12:36,272
希特勒？ -你是德國牧羊犬…

1552
01:12:36,355 --> 01:12:38,482
算了 -我懂了，希特勒地獄梗

1553
01:12:39,901 --> 01:12:41,903
瑪姬加油！瑪姬加油！

1554
01:12:46,282 --> 01:12:47,867
我聞出…暗巷大媽

1555
01:12:47,950 --> 01:12:49,368
披薩、吐出來的披薩？

1556
01:12:49,452 --> 01:12:51,162
熱狗、大家的尿

1557
01:12:51,245 --> 01:12:53,080
鷹毛、丹尼斯奎德？

1558
01:12:53,164 --> 01:12:55,249
松鼠3P、我完全不知情的死兔兔

1559
01:12:55,333 --> 01:12:56,959
杭特大老二、一堆狗大便

1560
01:12:57,043 --> 01:12:59,045
波士頓梗犬小雞雞，還有…

1561
01:12:59,128 --> 01:13:00,838
雷吉！我聞出來了！

1562
01:13:00,922 --> 01:13:02,590
水啦，瑪姬！ -我們走！

1563
01:13:02,673 --> 01:13:04,509
我們走！謝啦，羅夫！

1564
01:13:04,592 --> 01:13:06,761
你耍我們那次除外

1565
01:13:06,844 --> 01:13:08,304
祝好運，大兵！

1566
01:13:08,387 --> 01:13:10,681
拍謝我就是個混蛋！

1567
01:13:10,765 --> 01:13:12,225
看來該好好精進一下

1568
01:14:04,861 --> 01:14:06,529
多謝你大便在地毯上喔

1569
01:14:06,612 --> 01:14:09,031
腦殘喔？

1570
01:14:09,115 --> 01:14:11,993
你這隻白痴死廢狗

1571
01:14:20,751 --> 01:14:23,337
閃邊去啦

1572
01:14:23,754 --> 01:14:25,256
大爛狗！

1573
01:14:32,221 --> 01:14:35,099
聽聽你那什麼破嗓，死廢渣

1574
01:15:02,168 --> 01:15:05,296
最後在地毯上拉坨告別屎，就走了吧

1575
01:15:25,650 --> 01:15:26,567
嘿，道格

1576
01:15:28,110 --> 01:15:29,195
媽的！

1577
01:15:29,278 --> 01:15:31,489
是我，雷吉

1578
01:15:31,572 --> 01:15:34,784
我知道你聽不懂我在說什麼

1579
01:15:34,867 --> 01:15:36,744
也太誇張了吧

1580
01:15:36,827 --> 01:15:39,413
但我想說說我的感受

1581
01:15:39,497 --> 01:15:43,334
我知道你不喜歡我，很明顯

1582
01:15:43,417 --> 01:15:45,461
你把我載去丟掉

1583
01:15:45,878 --> 01:15:50,341
但我已用盡全力讓你感覺被愛

1584
01:15:50,424 --> 01:15:55,513
我以為多愛你一點，有天你就會愛我

1585
01:15:57,014 --> 01:15:58,683
後來我認識了新朋友

1586
01:15:58,766 --> 01:16:03,271
一隻地表最窩心、老二超帥氣的大狗

1587
01:16:03,354 --> 01:16:06,023
一隻地表最有才、史上最無敵的母狗

1588
01:16:06,107 --> 01:16:12,613
一個我交過最機歪、最搞笑的賤麻吉

1589
01:16:12,697 --> 01:16:17,034
我還認識了我兒子小矮人，還搞上了

1590
01:16:17,618 --> 01:16:22,707
重點是，這些朋友讓我明白什麼叫真愛

1591
01:16:22,790 --> 01:16:25,293
我們離真愛遠得很

1592
01:16:25,376 --> 01:16:28,588
現在我明白我不是大爛狗

1593
01:16:28,671 --> 01:16:31,716
你是大爛人

1594
01:16:31,799 --> 01:16:33,676
大爛人！死爛人！

1595
01:16:38,055 --> 01:16:41,225
再會了，道格，去死吧

1596
01:16:48,316 --> 01:16:53,196
是要怎樣才能徹底甩掉你？

1597
01:16:53,279 --> 01:16:58,910
有那麼難懂嗎？我開三小時車把你丟掉

1598
01:16:58,993 --> 01:17:02,663
是要怎樣你才會明白老子根本不屑你

1599
01:17:02,747 --> 01:17:06,667
老子一點也不愛你，去死吧，廢渣

1600
01:17:08,794 --> 01:17:11,797
至少我找到愛我的人

1601
01:17:11,881 --> 01:17:13,633
撒尿好麻吉萬歲

1602
01:17:16,761 --> 01:17:18,513
撒尿好麻吉萬歲！

1603
01:17:19,013 --> 01:17:22,391
搞屁！這些狗哪來的？

1604
01:17:22,475 --> 01:17:24,769
靠北咧，現在是在拍狗狗電影嗎？

1605
01:17:27,313 --> 01:17:28,648
怎樣？

1606
01:17:28,731 --> 01:17:31,275
媽的想怎樣，頭套哥？

1607
01:17:41,619 --> 01:17:42,453
挫賽

1608
01:17:48,918 --> 01:17:49,961
雷吉，沒事吧？

1609
01:17:50,044 --> 01:17:51,879
蟲仔，很抱歉對你說了那些話

1610
01:17:51,963 --> 01:17:53,172
現在沒空管這個

1611
01:17:53,256 --> 01:17:55,132
我們還有雞雞要咬

1612
01:17:59,512 --> 01:18:01,180
走開啦！

1613
01:18:02,139 --> 01:18:04,267
靠，放開我！

1614
01:18:04,350 --> 01:18:06,352
放開！媽的！

1615
01:18:07,228 --> 01:18:09,647
幹，我的膝蓋！要死了！

1616
01:18:10,523 --> 01:18:12,316
敢惹我？

1617
01:18:14,986 --> 01:18:18,531
恁娘咧！賠我一台微波爐

1618
01:18:19,824 --> 01:18:21,492
踹給你死！

1619
01:18:23,244 --> 01:18:24,245
我的腳！

1620
01:18:29,041 --> 01:18:29,876
死廢渣！

1621
01:18:39,969 --> 01:18:41,429
幹，我的背！

1622
01:18:41,512 --> 01:18:42,972
大家！該閃了 -媽的！

1623
01:18:43,681 --> 01:18:46,058
雷吉！ -抓到你了，死廢狗！

1624
01:18:46,142 --> 01:18:50,188
是怎樣，交朋友啦？

1625
01:18:50,271 --> 01:18:53,232
死毛怪給我聽好

1626
01:18:53,941 --> 01:18:57,278
你們的好哥們毀了我的人生

1627
01:18:57,904 --> 01:19:00,740
在他出現之前，我過得好好的

1628
01:19:00,823 --> 01:19:05,369
有地方住、有老媽支票、有兩個馬子

1629
01:19:05,453 --> 01:19:10,791
現在我沒得住、沒馬子，整天擼雞雞

1630
01:19:11,375 --> 01:19:14,086
這隻廢狗害我變魯蛇

1631
01:19:14,587 --> 01:19:15,671
他哪來這麼多廢話？

1632
01:19:16,589 --> 01:19:19,008
看過《馬利與我》的結局嗎？

1633
01:19:20,259 --> 01:19:22,720
我也沒看過，媽的有夠鳥

1634
01:19:23,429 --> 01:19:26,682
但我很清楚這隻廢狗的結局

1635
01:19:27,934 --> 01:19:31,354
我會好好享受給你死的樂趣

1636
01:19:31,437 --> 01:19:32,897
兩位，就戰鬥位置 -誰叫你…

1637
01:19:32,980 --> 01:19:33,940
收到 -收到

1638
01:19:34,023 --> 01:19:34,857
把我害這麼慘

1639
01:19:35,900 --> 01:19:37,235
現在是怎樣？

1640
01:19:37,318 --> 01:19:39,111
排成一直線是想怎樣？

1641
01:19:41,989 --> 01:19:44,492
去死吧！

1642
01:20:16,440 --> 01:20:19,151
大爛狗

1643
01:20:20,027 --> 01:20:22,029
他媽的我就是

1644
01:21:38,689 --> 01:21:40,024
我們該閃了

1645
01:21:40,107 --> 01:21:42,527
要走了嗎？我還在回味欸

1646
01:21:44,237 --> 01:21:47,448
雷吉，說真的，我以為你沒那個膽

1647
01:21:47,532 --> 01:21:48,491
你超猛的

1648
01:21:48,574 --> 01:21:50,368
比我想像得還要生猛

1649
01:21:50,451 --> 01:21:51,410
差點就要限制級了

1650
01:21:51,494 --> 01:21:54,372
算你狠，林北只咬過小女生腳踝

1651
01:21:54,455 --> 01:21:57,291
你扯爆大男人雞雞

1652
01:22:12,306 --> 01:22:15,768
今天會是史上最讚的一天

1653
01:22:15,852 --> 01:22:19,647
我怎麼知道？因為每一天都超讚的啦

1654
01:22:20,439 --> 01:22:23,317
杭特繼續他在養老院的工作

1655
01:22:23,401 --> 01:22:24,861
現在的他不需要頭套了

1656
01:22:24,944 --> 01:22:27,822
頭套哥！你的燈罩咧？

1657
01:22:27,905 --> 01:22:30,366
巴仔，我現在不需要了

1658
01:22:30,449 --> 01:22:32,618
我也沒必要聽你在那邊放狗屁

1659
01:22:32,702 --> 01:22:33,578
去你的！

1660
01:22:33,661 --> 01:22:37,206
哇，抱歉傷了你的小心肝，拍謝啦

1661
01:22:37,290 --> 01:22:38,124
我要來去…

1662
01:22:39,208 --> 01:22:40,585
操你媽啦！

1663
01:22:41,294 --> 01:22:42,170
去死啦！

1664
01:22:42,253 --> 01:22:45,965
他終於鼓起勇氣開口對瑪姬告白

1665
01:22:46,048 --> 01:22:49,802
現在他們整天啪啪啪，當然是用狗爬式

1666
01:22:49,886 --> 01:22:51,554
好樣的，杭特

1667
01:22:52,471 --> 01:22:54,599
讓我想起年輕的時候

1668
01:22:55,516 --> 01:22:57,351
你年輕時上過狗？

1669
01:22:58,269 --> 01:22:59,103
蝦米？

1670
01:22:59,520 --> 01:23:02,899
瑪姬呢？她終於找到真正愛她的主人

1671
01:23:03,733 --> 01:23:08,029
她加入了警犬隊，是隊上最強的嗅探犬

1672
01:23:08,654 --> 01:23:11,824
{\an8}我喜歡她那套衣服，可愛

1673
01:23:11,908 --> 01:23:13,701
{\an8}那是制服，值勤用的

1674
01:23:13,784 --> 01:23:17,997
{\an8}蟲仔還是老樣子，但有個滿大的轉變

1675
01:23:18,456 --> 01:23:20,249
他對人類的態度不一樣了

1676
01:23:21,709 --> 01:23:24,670
至少對某個很特別的人類

1677
01:23:32,261 --> 01:23:36,057
當然啦，成為家犬，他需要適應一下

1678
01:23:39,393 --> 01:23:41,062
喔，北鼻，好蘇胡

1679
01:23:41,145 --> 01:23:43,231
妳的比朵朵的緊多了

1680
01:23:43,314 --> 01:23:45,483
這什麼材質？仿麂皮？

1681
01:23:47,026 --> 01:23:48,778
嘿 -嘿，凱文

1682
01:23:49,862 --> 01:23:51,864
大哥，拜託不要騎沙發

1683
01:23:53,491 --> 01:23:55,910
沒人能拆散我們

1684
01:23:57,119 --> 01:23:59,664
就是這樣，狗生真是太美好了

1685
01:24:00,706 --> 01:24:01,582
大家今晚見囉？

1686
01:24:01,666 --> 01:24:02,500
好！ -一定要的！

1687
01:24:02,583 --> 01:24:03,417
美食之夜

1688
01:24:07,547 --> 01:24:10,341
至於我呢，我選擇當流浪狗

1689
01:24:10,424 --> 01:24:12,260
林北過得好快樂

1690
01:24:12,927 --> 01:24:16,597
有狗狗需要幫忙，我會出現指引明燈

1691
01:24:17,348 --> 01:24:19,141
嗨，我是雷吉，你叫什麼名字？

1692
01:24:19,225 --> 01:24:21,602
嗨，我叫屎尿

1693
01:24:21,686 --> 01:24:24,230
那不是你的名字，相信我

1694
01:24:25,356 --> 01:24:29,735
遊戲規則一，想要什麼，尿在上面

1695
01:24:29,819 --> 01:24:32,154
尿了就是你的

1696
01:24:32,488 --> 01:24:33,573
這根路燈可以嗎？

1697
01:24:33,656 --> 01:24:36,033
那是我的 -好喔

1698
01:24:36,117 --> 01:24:38,995
規則二，想操就操，沒在怕的

1699
01:24:39,078 --> 01:24:40,705
酷欸！讚讚！

1700
01:24:40,788 --> 01:24:45,042
規則三，最重要的一條，沒有之一

1701
01:24:46,002 --> 01:24:48,129
你不是孤單的

1702
01:24:49,797 --> 01:24:52,800
曾經我以為道格就是我的全世界

1703
01:24:52,884 --> 01:24:55,303
現在我明白這世界是如此的寬廣

1704
01:24:55,386 --> 01:24:58,389
整個城市都是我的小狗窩

1705
01:24:58,806 --> 01:25:02,393
因為我有一個靠譜的好麻吉

1706
01:25:03,019 --> 01:25:04,687
嘿，遜咖 -嘿，廢咖

1707
01:25:08,316 --> 01:25:10,151
連恩，那隻可愛的小髒狗又來了！

1708
01:25:17,074 --> 01:25:18,743
這就是人森啊

1709
01:25:20,786 --> 01:25:22,580
誰是乖狗狗？

1710
01:25:22,663 --> 01:25:23,998
你就是乖狗狗

1711
01:25:25,082 --> 01:25:26,751
真是隻乖狗狗

1712
01:25:27,376 --> 01:25:29,462
道格讓我學到很多

1713
01:25:29,545 --> 01:25:31,297
這世上的確有很多爛人

1714
01:25:31,380 --> 01:25:35,593
但就連道格也無法否認，好人也不少

1715
01:25:35,676 --> 01:25:38,346
只要你睜大眼睛看清楚

1716
01:25:38,429 --> 01:25:39,263
嗨，小朋友！

1717
01:25:39,347 --> 01:25:41,516
咬爛你的肺！ -死郵差滾啦！

1718
01:25:41,599 --> 01:25:43,434
好活潑的狗狗喔

1719
01:25:43,518 --> 01:25:46,604
扯爆你的蛋！ -邪魔速退散！

1720
01:25:46,687 --> 01:25:49,315
林北數到三 -該死的魔鬼！

1721
01:25:49,398 --> 01:25:51,734
跳出去操死你！

1722
01:25:51,817 --> 01:25:53,569
跟空中那咖都去吃屎！

1723
01:25:53,653 --> 01:25:57,114
繼續走，算你聰明！ -滾啦！

1724
01:25:57,198 --> 01:25:58,449
繼續走！不要停！

1725
01:25:58,533 --> 01:26:00,284
明天最好別被我遇到！

1726
01:26:00,368 --> 01:26:01,827
滾啦！ -這就對了

1727
01:26:01,911 --> 01:26:03,329
最好別惹我大哥

1728
01:26:03,412 --> 01:26:07,542
別看我小小隻，狠起來嚇屎你！

1729
01:26:08,417 --> 01:26:09,752
問道格就知道！

1730
01:26:10,628 --> 01:26:13,172
我咬爆那傢伙的雞雞！

1731
01:27:54,065 --> 01:27:56,025
除了臉部多處撕裂傷

1732
01:27:56,108 --> 01:27:58,986
以及嚴重燒燙傷

1733
01:27:59,070 --> 01:28:04,575
我們還在體內發現數量驚人的糞便細菌

1734
01:28:04,659 --> 01:28:08,204
應該是來自…

1735
01:28:08,287 --> 01:28:11,541
拉在我臉上的狗大便？ -對

1736
01:28:15,795 --> 01:28:17,255
我看看喔

1737
01:28:17,338 --> 01:28:20,049
喔對，老二恐怕是接不回去了

1738
01:28:22,385 --> 01:28:25,346
媽的！

1739
01:28:30,852 --> 01:28:32,854
翻譯：賴小獅