1 00:00:09,342 --> 00:00:10,634 In 2002, playboy was doing 2 00:00:10,669 --> 00:00:13,387 Their first-ever nationally televised search 3 00:00:13,422 --> 00:00:14,938 For a "playboy" centerfold. 4 00:00:15,015 --> 00:00:16,256 Announcer: Fox tonight, 5 00:00:16,333 --> 00:00:19,435 12 sexy girls next door find out what it takes 6 00:00:19,437 --> 00:00:21,578 To become a "playboy" playmate. 7 00:00:21,613 --> 00:00:22,937 It was similar to, like, 8 00:00:23,015 --> 00:00:25,340 An "america's next top model" but for playmates. 9 00:00:25,417 --> 00:00:28,001 On the show, there were different levels 10 00:00:28,036 --> 00:00:30,404 Of undress that were happening. 11 00:00:30,439 --> 00:00:33,823 I didn't even know how to pose in a sexual way. 12 00:00:33,825 --> 00:00:37,185 Posing naked for the first time... 13 00:00:37,187 --> 00:00:38,645 Was terrifying. 14 00:00:38,722 --> 00:00:41,598 I was very insecure about my body. 15 00:00:41,633 --> 00:00:46,219 Once I posed for the show, I was no longer jill scott. 16 00:00:46,296 --> 00:00:50,049 I was now jill that posed naked. 17 00:00:50,125 --> 00:00:52,125 It's so wrong. 18 00:00:52,160 --> 00:00:53,761 ♪♪ 19 00:00:53,796 --> 00:00:55,929 That's the dark side, is what people say, 20 00:00:55,931 --> 00:00:57,480 You know, behind your back 21 00:00:57,557 --> 00:01:00,184 Or to your parents or to your kids. 22 00:01:00,219 --> 00:01:02,369 We signed up for it, you know? 23 00:01:02,404 --> 00:01:05,046 We kinda knew what we were going into. 24 00:01:05,124 --> 00:01:09,217 But with "playboy," you can either thrive in it... 25 00:01:09,219 --> 00:01:12,479 Or it can chew you up and spit you out. 26 00:01:12,556 --> 00:01:15,074 [motor revving] 27 00:01:15,150 --> 00:01:16,666 My name is hugh hefner. 28 00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:18,077 I'm editor-publisher of "playboy" magazine. 29 00:01:18,079 --> 00:01:19,419 Reporter: Playboy is one 30 00:01:19,496 --> 00:01:22,306 Of the most famous brand names in the world. 31 00:01:22,341 --> 00:01:24,458 It was simply to include sex as 32 00:01:24,493 --> 00:01:27,585 One natural part of a package for a male audience. 33 00:01:27,587 --> 00:01:29,429 Woman: When I made the choice to do "playboy," 34 00:01:29,464 --> 00:01:31,923 I didn't realize all the choices that I was making 35 00:01:32,001 --> 00:01:33,801 That came with that choice. 36 00:01:33,836 --> 00:01:36,911 Woman #2: We don't judge the men for buying the "playboy"s, 37 00:01:36,989 --> 00:01:39,681 But we judge the women for posing for "playboy." 38 00:01:39,683 --> 00:01:41,583 Jill: I was never jill anymore. 39 00:01:41,660 --> 00:01:44,352 I was jill that posed for "playboy." 40 00:01:44,430 --> 00:01:46,455 Woman #3: I just gave in and knew that I was 41 00:01:46,531 --> 00:01:48,207 Probably gonna go to hell. 42 00:01:48,283 --> 00:01:50,191 Woman #4: It got to a certain point 43 00:01:50,193 --> 00:01:52,102 Where it wasn't fun anymore. 44 00:01:52,179 --> 00:01:54,596 Sondra: This process was very painful, 45 00:01:54,673 --> 00:01:59,326 But I should be able to tell my story as I lived it. 46 00:01:59,361 --> 00:02:04,623 ♪♪ 47 00:02:07,452 --> 00:02:09,670 ♪♪ 48 00:02:09,705 --> 00:02:13,040 Growing up, my first "playboy" memory 49 00:02:13,075 --> 00:02:15,925 Would just be, in general, the beautiful women. 50 00:02:15,927 --> 00:02:17,660 It was, you know, carmen electra, 51 00:02:17,738 --> 00:02:21,131 Pam anderson, anna nicole, the--the start of it all-- 52 00:02:21,166 --> 00:02:24,484 Marilyn monroe, the most beautiful women. 53 00:02:24,519 --> 00:02:27,329 When I found my dad's "playboy"s, 54 00:02:27,406 --> 00:02:30,657 I just thought the women were beautiful, 55 00:02:30,734 --> 00:02:33,576 And I just wanted to look like that. 56 00:02:33,653 --> 00:02:35,395 I wanted to be like that. 57 00:02:35,472 --> 00:02:37,388 ♪♪ 58 00:02:37,466 --> 00:02:41,067 Playboy opened up a world 59 00:02:41,144 --> 00:02:43,387 That I would have never known, 60 00:02:43,422 --> 00:02:46,748 But that could be good or bad. 61 00:02:48,060 --> 00:02:51,378 In 2001, the playboy brand had a bit of a renaissance. 62 00:02:51,413 --> 00:02:53,504 ♪♪ 63 00:02:53,506 --> 00:02:56,858 At the time, hefner had just broken up with his wife. 64 00:02:56,935 --> 00:02:58,351 He was back on the market. 65 00:02:58,428 --> 00:03:00,495 Photographer: This way now, girls. This way. 66 00:03:00,572 --> 00:03:06,134 Playboy also was in the market to try to mainstream their brand 67 00:03:06,136 --> 00:03:08,845 'cause the print media was going out of business. 68 00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:10,838 Hefner saw his business dying. 69 00:03:10,916 --> 00:03:12,749 So, it's not surprising 70 00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:14,818 That any company would do whatever they have to 71 00:03:14,853 --> 00:03:17,695 To kind of sell what they need to to other people. 72 00:03:17,773 --> 00:03:20,023 So, 2001, there was several years 73 00:03:20,100 --> 00:03:23,593 Of house shows that were being pretty mainstream on mtv, 74 00:03:23,628 --> 00:03:25,636 Like "the real world," 75 00:03:25,638 --> 00:03:26,579 "road rules," 76 00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:28,064 "making the band." 77 00:03:28,142 --> 00:03:30,334 It was the peak of reality shows. 78 00:03:30,369 --> 00:03:32,953 I don't know anybody that didn't spend their afternoons watching 79 00:03:33,029 --> 00:03:35,972 "real world" or "road rules" on mtv. 80 00:03:36,007 --> 00:03:39,392 This was the, like, explosion of reality tv. 81 00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:42,562 So, if playboy could come up with a television show, 82 00:03:42,639 --> 00:03:47,868 It could lead to other things. Playboy could be mainstream. 83 00:03:47,903 --> 00:03:50,628 ♪♪ 84 00:03:50,706 --> 00:03:55,341 And so the chance to pick a "playboy" playmate on television 85 00:03:55,343 --> 00:03:57,135 Was something that really hadn't been seen before. 86 00:03:57,212 --> 00:04:00,155 So, ultimately, playboy got a sale 87 00:04:00,157 --> 00:04:02,908 For a 2-hour special on fox, 88 00:04:02,985 --> 00:04:04,343 And I was appointed the showrunner. 89 00:04:04,419 --> 00:04:07,328 Our goal was to ultimately give everybody 90 00:04:07,330 --> 00:04:09,973 A glimpse what it's like picking a "playboy" centerfold 91 00:04:10,008 --> 00:04:11,649 Without being perverse. 92 00:04:11,727 --> 00:04:15,829 Hefner: This is the portal to the possibility of hollywood 93 00:04:15,905 --> 00:04:20,466 Or modeling or some moment in the sun as a celebrity. 94 00:04:20,544 --> 00:04:21,943 "who wants to be a playboy centerfold?"-- 95 00:04:22,020 --> 00:04:24,654 It was similar to, like, an "america's next top model," 96 00:04:24,689 --> 00:04:25,889 But for playmates. 97 00:04:25,924 --> 00:04:27,607 The prize was becoming the centerfold, 98 00:04:27,642 --> 00:04:29,859 Being playmate, mis July 2002. 99 00:04:29,936 --> 00:04:31,436 ♪♪ 100 00:04:31,438 --> 00:04:35,957 So, the dream of being a centerfold, obviously, is 101 00:04:36,034 --> 00:04:39,035 For the fame, but it is very lucrative. 102 00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:40,170 It's very lucrative. 103 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:45,291 A centerfold gets $25,000 for playmate of the month 104 00:04:45,368 --> 00:04:48,495 And $100,000 for playmate of the year, 105 00:04:48,530 --> 00:04:53,183 And you can actually turn that into a whole career. 106 00:04:53,218 --> 00:04:54,776 ♪♪ 107 00:04:54,853 --> 00:04:55,943 When we were out casting 108 00:04:56,021 --> 00:04:57,779 For "who wants to be a playboy centerfold?", 109 00:04:57,856 --> 00:04:59,622 There were thousands of submissions. 110 00:04:59,699 --> 00:05:01,299 D.J.: Star 98.7, los angeles. 111 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,318 Right now, down at playboy studio west, 112 00:05:03,395 --> 00:05:05,378 Hugh hefner is looking for 12 finalists 113 00:05:05,413 --> 00:05:07,889 To compete for "playboy"'s playmate of the month. 114 00:05:07,999 --> 00:05:10,817 We really spread a pretty wide net in the process 115 00:05:10,894 --> 00:05:12,227 Because we were looking for something 116 00:05:12,304 --> 00:05:16,172 That playboy had--had embodied for years and years and years-- 117 00:05:16,250 --> 00:05:17,399 That real experience 118 00:05:17,476 --> 00:05:20,968 Of someone being plucked out of hometown usa 119 00:05:21,046 --> 00:05:23,663 And brought to los angeles and living the dream. 120 00:05:23,698 --> 00:05:27,317 Hef always said that--that when he was picking playmates, 121 00:05:27,352 --> 00:05:29,502 He wanted it to be the girl next door. 122 00:05:29,537 --> 00:05:32,873 That would be what would-- to him, what made it special 123 00:05:32,908 --> 00:05:34,891 Is the girl that you never thought would do it, 124 00:05:34,926 --> 00:05:36,818 Not the girl that you knew would. 125 00:05:36,820 --> 00:05:40,004 My name is shallan. I'm 20 years old, 126 00:05:40,006 --> 00:05:41,097 And I'm from las vegas. 127 00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:43,341 Playboy was not my dream. 128 00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,735 I had just moved back to las vegas. 129 00:05:45,770 --> 00:05:49,180 I got a job at spago as a hostess, 130 00:05:49,182 --> 00:05:51,058 And you get all different types of people 131 00:05:51,093 --> 00:05:54,110 That come into spago's that was in caesar's palace. 132 00:05:54,112 --> 00:05:56,295 And this woman and another woman walk up, 133 00:05:56,297 --> 00:05:58,932 And she said, "can I ask you a couple questions? 134 00:05:58,967 --> 00:06:00,533 Are your boobs real?" 135 00:06:00,610 --> 00:06:02,051 In my mind, I'm thinking, I'm not sure 136 00:06:02,129 --> 00:06:04,929 If this woman's hitting on me. I just politely smiled 137 00:06:05,007 --> 00:06:08,024 And said, "yes, they are." [laughs] 138 00:06:08,101 --> 00:06:10,827 And so she gave me her card, and she said, "listen, 139 00:06:10,862 --> 00:06:13,622 We're doing the last round of casting for this show. 140 00:06:13,698 --> 00:06:16,983 I think you'd be great for, but it's with 'playboy.'" 141 00:06:17,060 --> 00:06:19,702 My face just looked like this. 142 00:06:19,779 --> 00:06:21,563 So, I let her know I was only 20, 143 00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:23,806 So she told me I should talk to my mom. 144 00:06:23,841 --> 00:06:25,808 I had never even seen a "playboy" before. 145 00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:26,927 ♪♪ 146 00:06:26,962 --> 00:06:29,387 So, my mom thought it would be really important 147 00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:32,373 For me to go pick up a "playboy," look at it, 148 00:06:32,451 --> 00:06:34,067 And see if the photos made me comfortable or not, 149 00:06:34,143 --> 00:06:37,378 See if it even seemed like something I could possibly do. 150 00:06:37,456 --> 00:06:40,490 But I was shy, so to pick up, you know, the magazine 151 00:06:40,567 --> 00:06:43,718 That had the black cover on it, like, quietly pay for it, 152 00:06:43,795 --> 00:06:45,545 I remember looking at the "playboy" and thinking, 153 00:06:45,580 --> 00:06:47,321 Wow, these women are gorgeous. 154 00:06:47,323 --> 00:06:49,758 I thought there is no way 155 00:06:49,834 --> 00:06:51,367 That they could make me look like those girls. 156 00:06:51,369 --> 00:06:54,971 You know, 'cause those girls-- they just don't look real. 157 00:06:55,006 --> 00:06:56,415 I felt like I was peeling through the pictures, 158 00:06:56,491 --> 00:07:00,251 Kind of getting, uh, nervous, 'cause I knew whatever it was 159 00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:01,645 Was a big opportunity. 160 00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:04,739 It's just whether or not I could be comfortable enough 161 00:07:04,741 --> 00:07:06,483 To go through with it, and I'm like, 162 00:07:06,518 --> 00:07:08,184 What I told my mom is, 163 00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:10,495 I don't know if I'm gonna be able to get naked. 164 00:07:10,572 --> 00:07:14,658 She goes, "well, there's only one way to find out." [laughs] 165 00:07:14,693 --> 00:07:16,643 I was incredibly shy, 166 00:07:16,678 --> 00:07:20,021 And the idea of walking around in a swimsuit 167 00:07:20,023 --> 00:07:21,331 Made me uncomfortable. 168 00:07:21,333 --> 00:07:24,517 I was scared, but, um, tired of being scared. 169 00:07:24,594 --> 00:07:26,761 I don't know--I feel like everyone's done that before, 170 00:07:26,838 --> 00:07:29,322 Where there's a lot of opportunities that led up 171 00:07:29,357 --> 00:07:32,175 To this opportunity, where I wondered what could have been, 172 00:07:32,210 --> 00:07:34,101 But I was just too afraid to do something. 173 00:07:34,179 --> 00:07:36,663 My mother said, "well, what are you thinking?" 174 00:07:36,698 --> 00:07:37,964 And I told her, "I don't know." 175 00:07:38,041 --> 00:07:40,133 I was sitting there, and all I could think about was, 176 00:07:40,209 --> 00:07:42,135 What if I'm 80 years old, 177 00:07:42,211 --> 00:07:44,887 And I have this story of what could have been, 178 00:07:44,964 --> 00:07:46,797 What I could have said yes to. 179 00:07:46,799 --> 00:07:48,875 I could either be 80 years old and be like, 180 00:07:48,952 --> 00:07:51,044 "you know, somebody tried to cast me once," 181 00:07:51,120 --> 00:07:54,305 Or I could be, "hey, let me show you these crazy pictures. 182 00:07:54,307 --> 00:07:56,716 Grandma was hot once." [laughs] 183 00:07:56,793 --> 00:07:58,559 So, I went ahead and I said yes. 184 00:07:58,637 --> 00:08:00,804 I want to say it was about two days later 185 00:08:00,839 --> 00:08:03,740 That I had to fly to l.A. For the casting. 186 00:08:03,816 --> 00:08:06,459 I was not very good at makeup. 187 00:08:06,494 --> 00:08:11,497 Uh, my hair was a lot like this, and I was in, like, cargo pants. 188 00:08:11,574 --> 00:08:13,049 So, I'm getting on the airplane with these girls. 189 00:08:13,084 --> 00:08:16,136 These girls had the heels. They had the lashes. 190 00:08:16,171 --> 00:08:18,038 They had the lips. They had the hair. 191 00:08:18,073 --> 00:08:20,406 What am I doing here? [laughs] 192 00:08:20,559 --> 00:08:22,258 Like, why am I even here? 193 00:08:22,335 --> 00:08:23,651 Is this a waste of time? Is this a joke? 194 00:08:23,729 --> 00:08:26,496 Am I, like, the, okay, they have to throw that girl in there? 195 00:08:26,573 --> 00:08:27,738 Right? 196 00:08:27,816 --> 00:08:30,016 We get there, and right away 197 00:08:30,093 --> 00:08:31,968 They take us to playboy studio west. 198 00:08:32,003 --> 00:08:34,321 Uh, they have me put on a bathing suit, 199 00:08:34,356 --> 00:08:36,656 Put on a robe within a handful of minutes, 200 00:08:36,691 --> 00:08:39,083 And the whole time, this crew is filming me. 201 00:08:39,161 --> 00:08:40,143 -I'm billy. -Shallan. 202 00:08:40,178 --> 00:08:41,335 -Shallan? -Shallan. 203 00:08:41,413 --> 00:08:43,846 We're just gonna take about 10 or so polaroids. 204 00:08:43,923 --> 00:08:46,416 Okay. I've never done anything like that before, so... 205 00:08:46,451 --> 00:08:47,817 -Oh, really? Okay. -Really. 206 00:08:47,852 --> 00:08:49,836 Then you are just like the girl next door. 207 00:08:49,871 --> 00:08:54,365 The casting just kind of threw you in, like, hard, 208 00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:55,533 Like, "all right, take your top off. 209 00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:56,743 We got to get a polaroid." 210 00:08:56,778 --> 00:08:57,860 And I'm like... [gasps] 211 00:08:57,895 --> 00:09:00,563 And they're like, "it's now or never." 212 00:09:00,641 --> 00:09:01,998 ♪♪ 213 00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:07,503 Announcer: One by one, the ladies will be eliminated 214 00:09:07,505 --> 00:09:11,024 Until the chosen one becomes the magazine's miss July. 215 00:09:11,059 --> 00:09:12,325 Hi, I'm carmella. 216 00:09:12,402 --> 00:09:14,051 I'm from westlake, ohio, and I'm 19. 217 00:09:14,053 --> 00:09:17,647 I was so young. So young. 218 00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,650 ♪♪ 219 00:09:20,685 --> 00:09:23,152 I grew up in cleveland, ohio. 220 00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:28,233 I was not a very pretty young girl. 221 00:09:28,310 --> 00:09:30,025 I got made fun of at school. 222 00:09:30,027 --> 00:09:33,738 I used to go home crying every day from school. 223 00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:40,153 I was a super shy, very intimidated little girl. 224 00:09:40,229 --> 00:09:44,173 But by the time I turned 19, playboy came to town 225 00:09:44,208 --> 00:09:47,127 For "who wants to be a playboy centerfold?" 226 00:09:47,162 --> 00:09:48,945 It was on the local news 227 00:09:49,021 --> 00:09:51,005 And explained the premise of the show, 228 00:09:51,007 --> 00:09:52,957 And I looked at the tv, and I'm like, 229 00:09:52,959 --> 00:09:54,192 "I'm gonna do that." 230 00:09:54,269 --> 00:09:57,094 So, I take it you're interested in being in "playboy"? 231 00:09:57,096 --> 00:09:59,138 Yes, I wanna be a playmate. 232 00:09:59,140 --> 00:10:01,157 I'm nervous, but I'm kind of excited, though. 233 00:10:01,192 --> 00:10:02,592 ♪♪ 234 00:10:02,669 --> 00:10:04,852 The audition process in and of itself 235 00:10:04,930 --> 00:10:07,513 Was, uh, very intimidating. 236 00:10:07,548 --> 00:10:08,973 There's no preparation. 237 00:10:08,975 --> 00:10:12,193 It was--it's--it's a freak out. It's a freak-out moment. 238 00:10:13,071 --> 00:10:16,114 I didn't even know how to pose in a sexual way. 239 00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:20,860 I was 19, so it was definitely new 240 00:10:20,937 --> 00:10:24,038 And, um...Awkward. 241 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:26,833 My name is lauren anderson. I'm 21 years old, 242 00:10:26,868 --> 00:10:29,385 And I'm from gainesville, florida. 243 00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:32,054 I would like to be a veterinarian someday. 244 00:10:32,131 --> 00:10:34,924 Animals are-- are definitely my passion. 245 00:10:34,926 --> 00:10:36,225 Playboy wasn't on-- 246 00:10:36,227 --> 00:10:38,469 I mean, no, that was not something 247 00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:41,397 That I had a dream of being. 248 00:10:41,474 --> 00:10:43,958 I was in college at the university of florida, 249 00:10:44,035 --> 00:10:46,953 And I was studying to be a veterinarian. 250 00:10:46,988 --> 00:10:48,729 Being in "playboy" when 251 00:10:48,731 --> 00:10:51,357 The situation presented itself, I was in my senior year. 252 00:10:51,359 --> 00:10:53,659 I had done a little bit of local modeling, 253 00:10:53,694 --> 00:10:55,553 And my agent, uh, called me and said that playboy 254 00:10:55,630 --> 00:10:57,972 Was coming to do the "college girls" issue. 255 00:10:58,049 --> 00:10:59,899 She said, "just go. You don't have to do it, you know? 256 00:10:59,976 --> 00:11:01,201 Just go see what it's all about." 257 00:11:01,236 --> 00:11:02,869 And I-I went, and, um, 258 00:11:02,904 --> 00:11:06,255 I told them that I would not pose fully nude, 259 00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:07,573 But they said, okay, 260 00:11:07,650 --> 00:11:10,818 And--and they still selected me to represent my university, 261 00:11:10,896 --> 00:11:12,503 And I was only topless. 262 00:11:12,505 --> 00:11:14,898 You know, playboy is--it has-- they have this way 263 00:11:14,933 --> 00:11:17,099 Of just making you feel totally comfortable, 264 00:11:17,252 --> 00:11:19,185 Even when you're--even when you're standing there 265 00:11:19,262 --> 00:11:20,427 Without a top on. 266 00:11:20,429 --> 00:11:23,673 When I was in high school, middle school, 267 00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:27,101 I always was worried about my body and what it looked like. 268 00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:28,845 And even though I was thin, again, 269 00:11:28,921 --> 00:11:32,123 I-I didn't have a perfect body. Nobody has a perfect body. 270 00:11:32,200 --> 00:11:35,284 But I had these boobs that were, you know, 271 00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:37,070 Yes, you know, boys loved 'em, 272 00:11:37,105 --> 00:11:40,197 But they were these boobs that were a real issue for me. 273 00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:43,576 This is the "college girls" issue that I was in, 274 00:11:43,611 --> 00:11:45,536 Representing the university of florida 275 00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:47,080 For "girls of the sec," 276 00:11:47,115 --> 00:11:48,614 And there's mine. 277 00:11:48,691 --> 00:11:52,209 -Producer: How old were you? -Just turned 21. 278 00:11:52,211 --> 00:11:54,637 So shortly after I did the "college girls" issue, 279 00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:57,457 I got a call from playboy that they were doing a-- 280 00:11:57,533 --> 00:12:00,142 Their first-ever nationally, um, televised search 281 00:12:00,219 --> 00:12:01,719 For a "playboy" centerfold 282 00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:03,963 And asked if I wanted to go and audition in miami. 283 00:12:04,115 --> 00:12:05,615 I kind of went, just like, oh, that-- 284 00:12:05,650 --> 00:12:07,633 That would be a cool experience. 285 00:12:07,710 --> 00:12:10,069 She had driven down from, um, 286 00:12:10,104 --> 00:12:12,496 Her college at university of florida. 287 00:12:12,574 --> 00:12:13,773 Lauren was very confident. 288 00:12:13,883 --> 00:12:16,150 Um, you can tell she is competitive, 289 00:12:16,152 --> 00:12:20,262 And she definitely understood what she was doing there 290 00:12:20,297 --> 00:12:22,056 And what her goals were, um, 291 00:12:22,058 --> 00:12:25,201 But she was insecure in her own body in some ways, 292 00:12:25,236 --> 00:12:27,720 Which made her interesting to us. 293 00:12:27,755 --> 00:12:30,123 Very nice right there. One, two, and three. 294 00:12:30,158 --> 00:12:32,308 -[camera shutter clicks] -very--that is beautiful. 295 00:12:32,343 --> 00:12:33,918 Excellent. Arch your back. 296 00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:35,252 -Three. -[camera shutter clicks] 297 00:12:35,254 --> 00:12:38,798 Ugh. Tugs at my heartstrings, seeing myself like that. 298 00:12:38,833 --> 00:12:40,241 It's pretty uncomfortable, though. 299 00:12:40,318 --> 00:12:43,352 That--that--that shot that's on all fours, 300 00:12:43,429 --> 00:12:45,596 That was a little odd. I don't remember doing that. 301 00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:47,356 You know, I feel like when I'm-- I'm watching that, 302 00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:49,342 I'm just this kid. 303 00:12:49,418 --> 00:12:50,977 Even though I'm an adult, obviously, 304 00:12:51,012 --> 00:12:53,195 And just posing on all fours 305 00:12:53,272 --> 00:12:54,605 And, you know, posing in a bikini, 306 00:12:54,607 --> 00:12:55,982 Like, it's no big thing, 307 00:12:56,017 --> 00:12:59,201 And then jump in my mustang and head back to college. 308 00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:00,778 [laughs] 309 00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:05,174 I was just so young and innocent. 310 00:13:05,209 --> 00:13:06,433 My name is jill scott. 311 00:13:06,544 --> 00:13:09,103 I'm 21 years old, and I'm from atlanta, georgia. 312 00:13:09,180 --> 00:13:10,279 [laughs] 313 00:13:10,356 --> 00:13:13,500 When I was 20, 314 00:13:13,535 --> 00:13:15,618 I worked at a club in atlanta, 315 00:13:15,695 --> 00:13:20,548 And I ran into a girl that I also worked with at hooters. 316 00:13:20,625 --> 00:13:21,782 She ran up to me, and she was like, 317 00:13:21,860 --> 00:13:24,877 "oh, my gosh, I just shot for 'playboy.'" 318 00:13:24,954 --> 00:13:27,121 And I was like, "I would love to-- 319 00:13:27,231 --> 00:13:28,806 What? I would love to do that." 320 00:13:28,883 --> 00:13:31,801 So within a week, I was doing my test shots for "playboy." 321 00:13:31,953 --> 00:13:35,038 That was my first time ever, ever posing nude. 322 00:13:35,073 --> 00:13:38,224 It just--it never bothered me. It... 323 00:13:38,301 --> 00:13:42,545 I ended up doing, like, 20 special editions. 324 00:13:42,580 --> 00:13:44,063 "playboy college girls," 325 00:13:44,140 --> 00:13:46,816 "playboy nudes," "playboy lingerie." 326 00:13:46,893 --> 00:13:50,787 So, the...Photographer that shot me 327 00:13:50,789 --> 00:13:55,975 For these special editions called me one day and said, 328 00:13:56,010 --> 00:13:58,836 "get--get your butt down to atlanta." [laughs] 329 00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:00,713 She didn't even tell me what it was about. 330 00:14:00,748 --> 00:14:03,657 She just said, "they're doing a casting call." 331 00:14:03,659 --> 00:14:07,344 So, I get there, and they took a headshot. 332 00:14:07,346 --> 00:14:08,588 The raw polaroid. 333 00:14:08,664 --> 00:14:10,848 There's no hair. There's no makeup. 334 00:14:10,925 --> 00:14:14,327 There's no lighting. It is what you look like. 335 00:14:14,329 --> 00:14:18,797 The--the girls that I saw in my audition were flawless. 336 00:14:18,875 --> 00:14:22,451 Fake boobs, spray-tanned, itty-bitty waist. 337 00:14:22,528 --> 00:14:25,254 So, I had no idea if I should have even been there, 338 00:14:25,256 --> 00:14:27,356 Or if I was just really good drama. 339 00:14:27,509 --> 00:14:29,942 Hey, let's take this girl that's never even seen a "playboy," 340 00:14:29,977 --> 00:14:32,528 That hasn't done anything, and let's just throw her in. 341 00:14:32,563 --> 00:14:34,597 [blows raspberry] see what happens. 342 00:14:34,632 --> 00:14:37,207 I would definitely put you onto the next round. 343 00:14:37,209 --> 00:14:39,769 -Really? -Absolutely. Absolutely. 344 00:14:39,804 --> 00:14:41,378 So, you're in there for the interview. 345 00:14:41,380 --> 00:14:42,422 [laughs] 346 00:14:42,457 --> 00:14:45,174 So, when the women were selected, 347 00:14:45,176 --> 00:14:49,495 Hefner was very good at that part of verbalizing 348 00:14:49,572 --> 00:14:51,564 What this woman had or what this woman lacked 349 00:14:51,599 --> 00:14:53,390 Or what they thought was important here 350 00:14:53,392 --> 00:14:54,917 Or what they thought were contenders there. 351 00:14:54,995 --> 00:14:57,561 Jill scott. Any reactions? 352 00:14:57,563 --> 00:14:59,354 She looks like a texas cheerleader to me. 353 00:14:59,356 --> 00:15:03,276 Mm-hmm. She looks like a very logical candidate. 354 00:15:03,278 --> 00:15:05,736 So, I got the final phone call, 355 00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:09,390 And they said, "you've made it. You're coming to l.A.," 356 00:15:09,467 --> 00:15:13,786 Which I've never even been on a plane before. [laughs] 357 00:15:13,788 --> 00:15:19,833 Being one of 12 girls chosen in the entire country was surreal. 358 00:15:19,835 --> 00:15:22,920 -You've been picked. -[screams and laughs] 359 00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:24,013 [loud cheers and laughter] 360 00:15:24,090 --> 00:15:26,182 I wasn't sure if I could go through with it, 361 00:15:26,258 --> 00:15:27,833 But I was really excited. 362 00:15:27,910 --> 00:15:29,760 -Hi. Is this shallan? -Yes, it is. 363 00:15:29,762 --> 00:15:31,095 You're coming out to california. 364 00:15:31,097 --> 00:15:32,338 [laughs] 365 00:15:32,415 --> 00:15:33,856 I was shocked when they picked me. 366 00:15:33,933 --> 00:15:37,601 You were one of the people that, um, was chosen. 367 00:15:37,603 --> 00:15:38,811 Yay. [laughs] 368 00:15:38,846 --> 00:15:41,755 I wasn't terrified of posing. I wasn't terrified of "playboy." 369 00:15:41,833 --> 00:15:44,016 I was terrified of living in a house 370 00:15:44,093 --> 00:15:46,502 And competing with 11 other women. 371 00:15:46,537 --> 00:15:50,173 Carmella: I was so excited, 372 00:15:50,208 --> 00:15:52,274 Nervous, shocked. 373 00:15:52,309 --> 00:15:55,611 There were just such a range of emotions 374 00:15:55,646 --> 00:15:57,697 That I felt terrified, 375 00:15:57,773 --> 00:16:00,482 And especially coming from such a small town, 376 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:03,786 It was so difficult for me to leave. 377 00:16:03,863 --> 00:16:06,171 But I had dreams, and big ones. 378 00:16:06,249 --> 00:16:08,708 Next thing I knew, I was landing at lax 379 00:16:08,743 --> 00:16:11,627 And completely freaking out. 380 00:16:11,704 --> 00:16:13,596 ♪♪ 381 00:16:16,785 --> 00:16:18,351 When you first walk in the house, 382 00:16:18,386 --> 00:16:19,960 All the furniture was beautiful, 383 00:16:20,038 --> 00:16:22,722 And it, you know, just didn't really seem real. 384 00:16:22,757 --> 00:16:24,791 Everybody just sort of walked around 385 00:16:24,900 --> 00:16:26,575 Talking to each other about, you know, 386 00:16:26,652 --> 00:16:28,978 "what do you do?" or--and, you know, 387 00:16:29,055 --> 00:16:30,137 "what modeling have you done?" 388 00:16:30,215 --> 00:16:31,380 That's all the chatter was, 389 00:16:31,415 --> 00:16:33,082 Comparing ourselves to everybody else. 390 00:16:33,159 --> 00:16:37,327 I was, um, savannah's miss hawaiian tropic. 391 00:16:37,329 --> 00:16:39,222 We talked with "playboy," and we really came up 392 00:16:39,257 --> 00:16:41,182 With a 3-pronged attack 393 00:16:41,259 --> 00:16:43,518 Of how we're going to feature the women, 394 00:16:43,594 --> 00:16:45,545 Because we need to show the audience 395 00:16:45,580 --> 00:16:47,654 That there was a process, right? 396 00:16:47,732 --> 00:16:48,931 How they look in a bikini, 397 00:16:49,008 --> 00:16:50,783 How they look over here by the banister. 398 00:16:50,860 --> 00:16:52,343 And, obviously, in this process, 399 00:16:52,420 --> 00:16:56,072 There were different levels of undress that were happening. 400 00:16:56,182 --> 00:16:58,015 The audition process with cameras-- 401 00:16:58,017 --> 00:16:59,726 That--I mean, that was really intense, 402 00:16:59,761 --> 00:17:01,668 But that is nothing compared to the actual experience 403 00:17:01,746 --> 00:17:04,046 Of filming a reality show. 404 00:17:04,124 --> 00:17:05,565 You were just filmed 24/7. 405 00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:08,358 They were filming everything at all times. 406 00:17:08,360 --> 00:17:09,769 You start to open your eyes, 407 00:17:09,845 --> 00:17:11,370 And literally there's somebody standing over a bed, 408 00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:14,407 Like, with the camera in your face 409 00:17:14,442 --> 00:17:17,426 Watching you wake up. 410 00:17:17,461 --> 00:17:19,628 And like most house reality shows, 411 00:17:19,705 --> 00:17:22,815 There were definitely characters that everyone was playing, 412 00:17:22,892 --> 00:17:25,150 And--and whether or not you realized it, 413 00:17:25,228 --> 00:17:27,303 The production company itself 414 00:17:27,379 --> 00:17:30,030 Had already picked which character you were gonna be. 415 00:17:30,108 --> 00:17:31,399 I believed that they decided 416 00:17:31,475 --> 00:17:35,452 I'd be the quiet, relatable underdog. 417 00:17:35,530 --> 00:17:39,448 From the beginning, I was typecast as the wild child. 418 00:17:39,483 --> 00:17:41,984 I am definitely the wild girl from atlanta. 419 00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:48,124 I drank and ended up showing my...Clit piercing. 420 00:17:48,159 --> 00:17:49,292 Let me see. 421 00:17:49,327 --> 00:17:52,302 I am, too. Oh, my god. Look at mine. [laughs] 422 00:17:52,380 --> 00:17:56,390 So, one night, we went out to a bar in l.A. 423 00:17:56,467 --> 00:17:58,818 [cheers and laughter] 424 00:17:58,894 --> 00:18:00,836 Woman: Jill is the total wild child, 425 00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:02,154 The one that you get around, 426 00:18:02,231 --> 00:18:04,807 And you just can't wait to see what she's gonna do next. 427 00:18:04,842 --> 00:18:05,991 Woman #2: Playmates can be really wild, 428 00:18:06,068 --> 00:18:07,751 But I think she just got a little too wild. 429 00:18:07,753 --> 00:18:10,679 Not to say that we're not here to have fun. 430 00:18:10,756 --> 00:18:14,350 We just drank, and I just got on a table and danced. 431 00:18:14,426 --> 00:18:17,094 I know I wasn't the only one, but they cut it 432 00:18:17,096 --> 00:18:19,930 To make me look like I was the only one. 433 00:18:19,932 --> 00:18:21,206 But your first night here, 434 00:18:21,284 --> 00:18:22,758 You don't wanna get trashed and wasted, 435 00:18:22,793 --> 00:18:24,352 And we're all here, like, on business. 436 00:18:24,428 --> 00:18:26,595 It's really important that we do well and we look well, 437 00:18:26,672 --> 00:18:29,773 And you don't wanna do anything to jeopardize that. 438 00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:32,342 The way I saw it is we were filming for "playboy." 439 00:18:32,420 --> 00:18:36,030 We were con--we were competing for centerfold, 440 00:18:36,032 --> 00:18:39,391 Not for catholic schoolgirl of the month. 441 00:18:39,469 --> 00:18:41,694 You know, they wanted fun and wild. 442 00:18:41,770 --> 00:18:44,864 That's the bunny. That's the--the whole logo. 443 00:18:44,940 --> 00:18:48,650 A bunny is fun, and they have a lot of sex. 444 00:18:48,728 --> 00:18:50,444 ♪♪ 445 00:18:50,521 --> 00:18:56,133 When I made the show, it was definitely a dream come true. 446 00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:59,028 This could be something that would-- 447 00:18:59,063 --> 00:19:00,379 Really would change my life, 448 00:19:00,456 --> 00:19:03,565 And I don't mean in acting or, you know, 449 00:19:03,642 --> 00:19:09,856 What I can get away from all the things at home. 450 00:19:09,891 --> 00:19:13,526 You know, I had a chaotic childhood. 451 00:19:15,529 --> 00:19:16,929 Um... 452 00:19:17,006 --> 00:19:20,082 Well, yeah, I mean, my mom's [bleep] 453 00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:24,470 Snuck in my room at night, so, you know, there was that. 454 00:19:24,505 --> 00:19:27,874 Mm. 455 00:19:27,909 --> 00:19:30,226 Yeah. Yeah. 456 00:19:30,261 --> 00:19:33,729 ♪♪ 457 00:19:33,731 --> 00:19:40,252 Once my dad found out that I'd been molested... 458 00:19:40,329 --> 00:19:43,055 The court did not... 459 00:19:43,090 --> 00:19:46,242 They--they didn't charge him the way that they should 460 00:19:46,277 --> 00:19:49,611 Because I'd been running away, but I'd been running away 461 00:19:49,688 --> 00:19:52,164 Because I'd been-- being molested. 462 00:19:52,199 --> 00:19:56,443 And that definitely sticks with, you know, 463 00:19:56,445 --> 00:19:59,238 In probably a lot of the choices that I made. 464 00:19:59,273 --> 00:20:01,865 ♪♪ 465 00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:03,292 So, I did not become, like, 466 00:20:03,369 --> 00:20:05,894 The bad girl of the show on purpose. 467 00:20:05,972 --> 00:20:09,198 I felt free, like... [laughs] I was across the country. 468 00:20:09,233 --> 00:20:11,708 For once, I'm doing something for me, 469 00:20:11,710 --> 00:20:13,753 And I'm far away from home. 470 00:20:13,788 --> 00:20:16,797 You don't like it? Kiss my ass. Just kidding. 471 00:20:16,799 --> 00:20:17,590 [laughs] 472 00:20:17,625 --> 00:20:19,324 I just... 473 00:20:19,326 --> 00:20:24,180 Probably hadn't hit a wild phase yet in my life. 474 00:20:24,215 --> 00:20:29,068 I struggled from the time that I literally landed at lax 475 00:20:29,070 --> 00:20:32,230 And felt so out of place. 476 00:20:32,232 --> 00:20:34,564 I just wanted to tell you you're all welcome. 477 00:20:34,566 --> 00:20:35,942 I know some of you have been going through 478 00:20:35,977 --> 00:20:38,394 A little emotional thing related to being away from home. 479 00:20:38,429 --> 00:20:41,480 And any of you who are having any kind of mixed emotions... 480 00:20:41,557 --> 00:20:43,382 ♪♪ 481 00:20:43,417 --> 00:20:45,234 -...Don't have. -[laughter] 482 00:20:45,311 --> 00:20:47,002 It's gonna be a grand adventure 483 00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:49,246 And something you're never gonna forget. 484 00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:50,564 It was probably 485 00:20:50,641 --> 00:20:53,960 About 24 hours of being there and then seeing the other girls 486 00:20:53,995 --> 00:20:56,845 And seeing kinda how the competition was going, 487 00:20:56,847 --> 00:20:58,898 And we hadn't shot any nudes yet. 488 00:20:58,900 --> 00:21:00,566 I knew it was coming. 489 00:21:00,601 --> 00:21:02,367 I'm sure that the anticipation of that 490 00:21:02,445 --> 00:21:04,536 Made it a hundred times worse. 491 00:21:04,614 --> 00:21:07,247 -What do you think it is? -I don't know. 492 00:21:07,325 --> 00:21:08,932 What is it? Is it the nudity that bothers you, 493 00:21:08,934 --> 00:21:10,843 Or is it being a-- -obviously, I've never shot 494 00:21:10,919 --> 00:21:12,328 A nide before, and I think that. 495 00:21:12,330 --> 00:21:14,814 -You've never shot modeling? -No, I never shot any nudes. 496 00:21:14,849 --> 00:21:17,533 I don't know. I just don't feel like it's me. 497 00:21:17,568 --> 00:21:19,318 I wanna go home. I'm out of my element. 498 00:21:19,353 --> 00:21:21,595 I'm out of my comfort zone. 499 00:21:21,672 --> 00:21:24,907 [line rings] 500 00:21:24,942 --> 00:21:26,342 -Woman: Hello? -Hi. 501 00:21:26,377 --> 00:21:27,951 -Hi. -I think I'm gonna come home. 502 00:21:27,953 --> 00:21:29,811 -Why? -It's just not me. I mean, 503 00:21:29,813 --> 00:21:32,390 This is--honestly, I mean, it's how I feel. It's not me. 504 00:21:32,466 --> 00:21:35,334 Well, carmella, everybody has discomfort the first time around 505 00:21:35,369 --> 00:21:37,611 When they're doing things, but, you know, you-- 506 00:21:37,613 --> 00:21:40,256 I just feel that it's not me, though. I'm more of, like-- 507 00:21:40,291 --> 00:21:42,691 Like, a modest person that wants to do, like, 508 00:21:42,726 --> 00:21:44,301 Like, a--a commercial or something like that. 509 00:21:44,303 --> 00:21:45,878 It's just I don't want to do it, 510 00:21:46,030 --> 00:21:47,954 And then be like, well, I wasn't comfortable doing it, 511 00:21:48,065 --> 00:21:49,673 And now I'm still not comfortable doing it. 512 00:21:49,675 --> 00:21:52,234 But, carmella, the thing is, all that you've done 513 00:21:52,269 --> 00:21:53,702 Is make the trip out there. 514 00:21:53,737 --> 00:21:57,072 Have you gone through any of the motions yet? 515 00:21:57,149 --> 00:21:58,482 No, you haven't, 516 00:21:58,484 --> 00:22:00,543 So the accomplishment that you're telling me 517 00:22:00,578 --> 00:22:01,877 You're glad that you went, 518 00:22:01,912 --> 00:22:04,746 What, that you got on a plane and went to l.A.? 519 00:22:04,748 --> 00:22:06,081 Carmella: Well, I'm not-- 520 00:22:06,158 --> 00:22:07,783 I'm definitely not gonna reconsider. Like, I'm... 521 00:22:07,818 --> 00:22:09,759 I feel pretty strongly about it. 522 00:22:09,761 --> 00:22:12,204 ♪♪ 523 00:22:12,239 --> 00:22:13,889 -Okay. [sighs] -I hope you're-- 524 00:22:13,924 --> 00:22:15,041 You sure you don't wanna change your mind? 525 00:22:15,076 --> 00:22:17,334 -I really don't. -Well, just call me 526 00:22:17,336 --> 00:22:18,711 When you get there. -Okay. 527 00:22:18,746 --> 00:22:21,246 -Love you. -All right, bye-bye. 528 00:22:21,281 --> 00:22:23,007 [hangs up receiver] 529 00:22:24,159 --> 00:22:27,511 Um...Sad. It makes me feel sad. 530 00:22:27,513 --> 00:22:33,517 I had a total freak-out moment, and I probably, 531 00:22:33,519 --> 00:22:36,020 As a 19-year-old, needed the support, 532 00:22:36,097 --> 00:22:38,731 Needed the support that it was okay to come home 533 00:22:38,841 --> 00:22:41,750 And that it was okay that I'm not ready. 534 00:22:41,785 --> 00:22:46,772 So, yeah, it's emotional. It's hard. It's hard. 535 00:22:46,849 --> 00:22:51,293 I felt like I disappointed my mom. 536 00:22:51,370 --> 00:22:54,455 ♪♪ 537 00:22:58,152 --> 00:23:01,729 ♪♪ 538 00:23:01,805 --> 00:23:04,540 Even though this was a reality show, 539 00:23:04,575 --> 00:23:06,150 You weren't voting at home. 540 00:23:06,260 --> 00:23:07,726 It was hef. It was hef and hef's team, 541 00:23:07,728 --> 00:23:10,120 And, really, mostly hef that was making 542 00:23:10,198 --> 00:23:12,881 The deciding factors as to who would make it to the next round. 543 00:23:12,958 --> 00:23:16,135 Half these girls, at minimum, are good candidates for... 544 00:23:16,170 --> 00:23:17,411 -Woman: Yep. -Man: Mm-hmm, yeah. 545 00:23:17,413 --> 00:23:18,728 -...For playmates... -Man: Yes, we all agree. 546 00:23:18,730 --> 00:23:20,106 ...You know, which puts us in a very nice place. 547 00:23:20,141 --> 00:23:23,609 Once we were at six contestants, 548 00:23:23,644 --> 00:23:26,995 We all did the fully nude photo shoot. 549 00:23:27,072 --> 00:23:30,198 ♪♪ 550 00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:33,786 The fully nude photo shoot upped everything. 551 00:23:33,821 --> 00:23:36,655 It upped the ante, it upped the drama, 552 00:23:36,732 --> 00:23:41,560 It upped the competition, and a lot of the tension, 553 00:23:41,595 --> 00:23:44,179 Just because everything got more real. 554 00:23:44,256 --> 00:23:47,115 Posing naked for the first time was terrifying. 555 00:23:47,193 --> 00:23:50,152 ♪♪ 556 00:23:50,187 --> 00:23:52,887 So, you walk in on set. There's lights everywhere. 557 00:23:52,889 --> 00:23:56,191 I was shaking on my heels, just... 558 00:23:56,268 --> 00:23:58,093 My eyes just kind of looked... 559 00:23:58,128 --> 00:24:00,179 "turn your hip this way. Turn that way. 560 00:24:00,255 --> 00:24:01,797 I need to put light on this angle. 561 00:24:01,873 --> 00:24:03,649 I need to fix this. I need to fix that." 562 00:24:03,684 --> 00:24:06,351 ♪♪ 563 00:24:06,428 --> 00:24:07,862 In a way, you are the product. 564 00:24:07,971 --> 00:24:10,539 ♪♪ 565 00:24:10,574 --> 00:24:13,208 I feel like you weren't even seen necessarily 566 00:24:13,285 --> 00:24:15,544 As a person when you were shooting. 567 00:24:15,621 --> 00:24:17,163 It was almost like a mannequin. 568 00:24:17,198 --> 00:24:18,947 ♪♪ 569 00:24:19,024 --> 00:24:21,700 I was very insecure about my body. 570 00:24:21,777 --> 00:24:23,985 Even though I was a contestant on this show, 571 00:24:24,063 --> 00:24:27,906 My body image was a big issue for me. 572 00:24:27,983 --> 00:24:29,458 To pose naked, 573 00:24:29,535 --> 00:24:32,227 It was definitely something inside of me 574 00:24:32,229 --> 00:24:34,971 That I had to really overcome 575 00:24:34,973 --> 00:24:37,716 Because it was probably my biggest issue with myself. 576 00:24:37,793 --> 00:24:39,451 ♪♪ 577 00:24:39,486 --> 00:24:41,336 When I shot my fully nude shoot, 578 00:24:41,414 --> 00:24:43,272 I had shot before for "playboy," 579 00:24:43,307 --> 00:24:46,575 But not on that scale and not at such a big studio 580 00:24:46,652 --> 00:24:51,463 That so many amazing women have shot before me. 581 00:24:51,465 --> 00:24:53,957 ♪♪ 582 00:24:53,959 --> 00:24:57,619 [sighs] you know, if I had to be honest, 583 00:24:57,621 --> 00:25:00,163 I felt they already knew who they were gonna pick, 584 00:25:00,165 --> 00:25:02,975 So I felt mine was a little rushed. 585 00:25:03,010 --> 00:25:04,092 ♪♪ 586 00:25:04,127 --> 00:25:07,938 After we filmed the nude photo shoot, 587 00:25:08,015 --> 00:25:11,550 They cut three girls and left three finalists. 588 00:25:11,552 --> 00:25:13,843 Today's the day where they have to pick three 589 00:25:13,845 --> 00:25:16,238 To move on to shoot their "playboy" centerfold. 590 00:25:16,273 --> 00:25:17,939 Christina. 591 00:25:18,016 --> 00:25:19,891 Playmate candidate number two is lauren. 592 00:25:19,893 --> 00:25:22,427 ♪♪ 593 00:25:22,504 --> 00:25:26,081 And our final playmate candidate is shallan. 594 00:25:26,191 --> 00:25:29,009 ♪♪ 595 00:25:29,086 --> 00:25:30,118 I never thought I'd win. 596 00:25:30,195 --> 00:25:31,845 I never thought I was good enough. 597 00:25:31,922 --> 00:25:35,457 It hurt my feelings so bad because 598 00:25:35,534 --> 00:25:38,710 That dream of being a centerfold was over. 599 00:25:38,787 --> 00:25:40,662 [crying] I love you all. Y'all... 600 00:25:40,664 --> 00:25:42,114 [door creaks] 601 00:25:42,190 --> 00:25:43,749 Maybe that's why I had the tears, 602 00:25:43,784 --> 00:25:47,803 Because I just didn't wanna go home. 603 00:25:47,879 --> 00:25:50,089 ♪♪ 604 00:25:50,198 --> 00:25:51,865 So, the final challenge for the three of us left 605 00:25:51,942 --> 00:25:53,558 Was a centerfold shoot. 606 00:25:53,635 --> 00:25:54,951 ♪♪ 607 00:25:55,029 --> 00:25:57,454 To shoot the actual centerfold that comes 608 00:25:57,531 --> 00:25:59,047 In and out of the magazine. 609 00:25:59,082 --> 00:26:01,742 It's "playboy." it's like the number-one selling magazine 610 00:26:01,819 --> 00:26:03,435 In the world, and these are the real shots 611 00:26:03,437 --> 00:26:06,622 That will go in the magazine, you know, if they're chosen. 612 00:26:06,657 --> 00:26:09,441 I was very concerned about being fully nude. 613 00:26:09,476 --> 00:26:13,178 I didn't want to show my body, um, but I was there competing, 614 00:26:13,255 --> 00:26:16,832 So my competitive nature kicked in. 615 00:26:16,867 --> 00:26:18,166 Then I wanted to win. 616 00:26:18,243 --> 00:26:22,003 ♪♪ 617 00:26:22,080 --> 00:26:24,156 I-I-I never thought I could have photos 618 00:26:24,158 --> 00:26:25,541 That looked quite so beautiful. 619 00:26:25,651 --> 00:26:30,162 ♪♪ 620 00:26:30,238 --> 00:26:31,963 So, we did our centerfold shoot. 621 00:26:31,965 --> 00:26:33,415 The three of us then just went back to the house 622 00:26:33,450 --> 00:26:35,341 And waited for hef to look at the centerfolds 623 00:26:35,343 --> 00:26:38,520 And for them to decide the winner of the show. 624 00:26:38,522 --> 00:26:42,749 What I like most about shallan, is, uh, is the face. 625 00:26:42,827 --> 00:26:47,312 Lauren--you cannot beat that schoolgirl fantasy. 626 00:26:47,314 --> 00:26:49,973 I think shallan makes the biggest impression in person. 627 00:26:49,975 --> 00:26:52,860 Lauren is the most photogenic, 628 00:26:52,936 --> 00:26:54,870 But I am going to go with... 629 00:26:54,946 --> 00:26:56,505 ♪♪ 630 00:26:56,540 --> 00:26:58,523 Then they sat the three of us down 631 00:26:58,558 --> 00:27:00,075 On a couch in the living room. 632 00:27:00,110 --> 00:27:01,685 I have three envelopes here. 633 00:27:01,762 --> 00:27:07,015 Inside the envelope contains an invitation 634 00:27:07,050 --> 00:27:10,218 To become a "playboy" playmate. 635 00:27:10,295 --> 00:27:11,720 You come this far. 636 00:27:11,755 --> 00:27:13,814 I mean, once we're there, I mean, we all wanted to win. 637 00:27:13,891 --> 00:27:16,708 You realized, wow, I might-- I might actually do this. 638 00:27:16,785 --> 00:27:20,721 ♪♪ 639 00:27:20,798 --> 00:27:22,381 When I opened the envelope 640 00:27:22,457 --> 00:27:24,983 And saw that it said, "congratulations," 641 00:27:25,060 --> 00:27:27,811 You know, I was happy that I-I had come all this way 642 00:27:27,813 --> 00:27:29,295 And that it was worth it. 643 00:27:29,373 --> 00:27:30,814 I think if I hadn't won, 644 00:27:30,816 --> 00:27:34,376 Maybe it might not have made me feel more confident 645 00:27:34,411 --> 00:27:35,694 And a-a stronger person. 646 00:27:35,729 --> 00:27:39,139 Even with all these body image issues, 647 00:27:39,216 --> 00:27:40,565 It made me feel something 648 00:27:40,642 --> 00:27:43,485 That I didn't know I felt that I had inside. 649 00:27:43,562 --> 00:27:47,239 ♪♪ 650 00:27:47,315 --> 00:27:49,925 Lauren was announced, and christina and I-- 651 00:27:49,927 --> 00:27:51,669 We were at the hotel with a tail-- 652 00:27:51,745 --> 00:27:53,011 Our tails between our legs, 653 00:27:53,088 --> 00:27:54,880 Waiting to go home in the morning. 654 00:27:54,915 --> 00:27:58,508 And we got a phone call, and it was hef asking us, 655 00:27:58,510 --> 00:28:00,752 How would we like to be playmates, too? 656 00:28:00,829 --> 00:28:02,905 Yeah, it was pretty intense. We were both really excited. 657 00:28:02,940 --> 00:28:04,664 Like, really excited. 658 00:28:04,742 --> 00:28:06,591 You know, I stayed the winner of the show, 659 00:28:06,668 --> 00:28:08,168 And that's what mattered to me. 660 00:28:08,245 --> 00:28:11,504 So, I was happy when christina and shallan became playmates. 661 00:28:11,582 --> 00:28:13,281 It's sad that the experience is over, 662 00:28:13,358 --> 00:28:16,284 But I'm glad I did it, and I'm glad I won. [laughs] 663 00:28:16,361 --> 00:28:18,404 So, thank you. 664 00:28:21,175 --> 00:28:23,124 I watched the show, yes, when it came on. 665 00:28:23,201 --> 00:28:25,327 I had a--we had a house party at my mom's house. 666 00:28:25,362 --> 00:28:26,929 We had lots of people over, 667 00:28:26,964 --> 00:28:28,997 And every-- we all watched it, yes. 668 00:28:31,794 --> 00:28:34,703 Well, they didn't show the-- the naked parts on national tv, 669 00:28:34,705 --> 00:28:36,721 So that was-- they didn't show those parts, 670 00:28:36,798 --> 00:28:37,706 Or they blurted out. 671 00:28:37,783 --> 00:28:39,507 Announcer: Wanna find the perfect playmate? 672 00:28:39,509 --> 00:28:41,068 Take a behind-the-scenes look 673 00:28:41,144 --> 00:28:44,563 At "girl next door: The search for a playboy centerfold." 674 00:28:44,565 --> 00:28:47,725 When the women came to the show, obviously, they knew 675 00:28:47,801 --> 00:28:51,386 They were signing up for the fox television show. 676 00:28:51,388 --> 00:28:53,855 And in the paperwork that they signed, ultimately, you know, 677 00:28:53,857 --> 00:28:57,609 Playboy was going to do their version of the show itself. 678 00:28:57,644 --> 00:29:00,279 "who wants to be a playboy centerfold?" 679 00:29:00,314 --> 00:29:04,065 My job was to, um, edit the show for the fox tv show, 680 00:29:04,142 --> 00:29:06,902 And for the uncensored version, 681 00:29:06,904 --> 00:29:09,312 Playboy had a team that was gonna come in and make 682 00:29:09,390 --> 00:29:10,914 The uncensored version. 683 00:29:10,916 --> 00:29:15,668 And so they all fully understood that going into it. 684 00:29:15,670 --> 00:29:17,646 Once the show aired, it--it was hard for me. 685 00:29:17,681 --> 00:29:21,908 When I first saw the unedited version, 686 00:29:21,986 --> 00:29:23,184 It was shocking. 687 00:29:23,261 --> 00:29:25,337 ♪♪ 688 00:29:25,413 --> 00:29:30,008 Everything that I did, it was on the unedited version. 689 00:29:30,085 --> 00:29:33,479 This was obviously before social media, 690 00:29:33,514 --> 00:29:36,498 But there were still blogs. 691 00:29:36,533 --> 00:29:38,500 ♪♪ 692 00:29:38,535 --> 00:29:40,268 There was nothing positive. 693 00:29:40,270 --> 00:29:43,046 Went from girl to girl to girl. 694 00:29:43,123 --> 00:29:44,231 They broke us all down. 695 00:29:44,233 --> 00:29:46,266 Everything bad about us. 696 00:29:46,343 --> 00:29:51,413 I think that they fed off of what they saw on the show. 697 00:29:51,523 --> 00:29:54,116 It was okay for the men on the show. 698 00:29:54,151 --> 00:29:56,018 They were breaking us down. 699 00:29:56,053 --> 00:29:58,153 -Jill. -This girl's face is fantastic, 700 00:29:58,229 --> 00:30:00,188 But there's some body problems. 701 00:30:00,298 --> 00:30:01,631 The only problem that I have with her physically 702 00:30:01,709 --> 00:30:02,541 Is the breasts. 703 00:30:02,617 --> 00:30:04,801 She's a little long in the torso. 704 00:30:04,803 --> 00:30:07,195 She's a little thick in the body. 705 00:30:07,305 --> 00:30:10,407 Which led to people online 706 00:30:10,484 --> 00:30:12,484 Feeling that they could do the same. 707 00:30:12,519 --> 00:30:16,471 ♪♪ 708 00:30:16,506 --> 00:30:18,564 But they're kind of nastier 709 00:30:18,566 --> 00:30:22,210 'cause there's nobody to filter them, you know, 710 00:30:22,287 --> 00:30:23,303 Or edit them. 711 00:30:23,380 --> 00:30:27,482 The very first article I read, he was quoting me as saying, 712 00:30:27,517 --> 00:30:30,326 "I'd never seen a 'playboy' before." 713 00:30:30,328 --> 00:30:33,146 And his--and then he said, "yeah, right. 714 00:30:33,223 --> 00:30:35,999 She looks like the town's teeter-totter." 715 00:30:36,076 --> 00:30:40,745 And I was, like, on the floor, bawling. It, like, destroyed me. 716 00:30:40,822 --> 00:30:48,687 [crying] 717 00:30:48,763 --> 00:30:51,098 Why would I cry now? 718 00:30:56,021 --> 00:30:58,504 Which is... [exhales deeply] 719 00:30:58,582 --> 00:31:01,099 Of course, one of the reasons why even now I'm like, oh, god. 720 00:31:01,176 --> 00:31:03,402 [cries] 721 00:31:05,739 --> 00:31:07,155 Mm. 722 00:31:08,742 --> 00:31:11,960 [laughs] I don't know, but everyone's had a go, 723 00:31:12,037 --> 00:31:16,272 Just a troll. But being 20, it hit deep. 724 00:31:16,350 --> 00:31:18,708 So, then I didn't look at anything else. 725 00:31:18,710 --> 00:31:22,104 My mom's like, "well... [sighs] you picked this world. 726 00:31:22,139 --> 00:31:24,089 You picked this life. 727 00:31:24,124 --> 00:31:25,941 So, you're either gonna have to hide away from everything 728 00:31:25,976 --> 00:31:27,383 Or get the toughest skin 729 00:31:27,385 --> 00:31:29,978 And know that most people aren't gonna agree with you, 730 00:31:30,055 --> 00:31:34,299 And most people won't have nice things to say." 731 00:31:34,376 --> 00:31:36,143 That was it. 732 00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:44,133 The three girls that won, their life changed. 733 00:31:44,211 --> 00:31:47,820 You know, so they--they went on tour. You know what I mean? 734 00:31:47,822 --> 00:31:51,783 Like, they didn't really have to go back to real life. 735 00:31:51,818 --> 00:31:53,810 You know, I'm from a smaller town. 736 00:31:53,887 --> 00:31:57,088 I mean, I'm outside of atlanta, you know? 737 00:31:57,165 --> 00:31:58,323 Lived there my whole life, 738 00:31:58,475 --> 00:31:59,808 So, I mean, everyone knew who I was. 739 00:31:59,843 --> 00:32:03,729 [sighs] I was an easy target. 740 00:32:03,764 --> 00:32:06,406 ♪♪ 741 00:32:06,483 --> 00:32:09,301 After the show, the jealousy and the judgment 742 00:32:09,336 --> 00:32:12,754 In my small town, it really brought me down. 743 00:32:12,831 --> 00:32:16,249 I guess people just wanted to come after me. 744 00:32:16,326 --> 00:32:17,643 At the time of filming, 745 00:32:17,678 --> 00:32:20,195 I was a single mother, and my daughter was 2. 746 00:32:20,271 --> 00:32:22,347 So, a group of girls from my small town 747 00:32:22,349 --> 00:32:28,261 Started attacking me using cps. 748 00:32:28,263 --> 00:32:30,172 That's child protective services. 749 00:32:30,207 --> 00:32:34,326 They contacted them, and they told them lies, 750 00:32:34,361 --> 00:32:38,454 And they used "playboy," you know, 751 00:32:38,456 --> 00:32:41,667 As the--the main attack. 752 00:32:41,702 --> 00:32:44,002 ♪♪ 753 00:32:44,037 --> 00:32:48,089 When you hear "playboy" and nudity and a little girl, 754 00:32:48,091 --> 00:32:50,842 They assume that you're a bad mother 755 00:32:50,877 --> 00:32:52,877 And that you're a slut. 756 00:32:52,954 --> 00:32:55,154 ♪♪ 757 00:32:55,156 --> 00:32:58,566 They removed my daughter... 758 00:32:58,643 --> 00:33:00,635 From my house. 759 00:33:00,670 --> 00:33:03,404 [voice breaking] yeah, it was really tough. 760 00:33:03,481 --> 00:33:06,157 And I demanded a meeting, 761 00:33:06,159 --> 00:33:09,385 And I said, you know, "I want to know, like, what are you doing? 762 00:33:09,463 --> 00:33:11,137 Like, why are you coming after me? 763 00:33:11,215 --> 00:33:12,638 What could I have done? 764 00:33:12,749 --> 00:33:14,307 I want to see what you have on me. 765 00:33:14,384 --> 00:33:19,162 I want to see this file that is tearing a family apart." 766 00:33:19,164 --> 00:33:21,056 And they opened it up, 767 00:33:21,091 --> 00:33:23,916 And it was all... 768 00:33:23,918 --> 00:33:25,143 "playboy" pictures. 769 00:33:25,178 --> 00:33:26,837 ♪♪ 770 00:33:26,913 --> 00:33:31,916 I had to spend the next year fighting to keep my daughter. 771 00:33:31,993 --> 00:33:36,988 I had to hire two attorneys. I had to take drug tests. 772 00:33:37,023 --> 00:33:39,182 I had to take hair follicle tests. 773 00:33:39,184 --> 00:33:45,004 I-I-I couldn't even tell you how hard that time was, 774 00:33:45,082 --> 00:33:48,424 And it broke me, you know? 775 00:33:48,426 --> 00:33:50,860 It--it--it broke me. 776 00:33:50,862 --> 00:33:54,022 I had to climb out of many of dark times. 777 00:33:54,099 --> 00:33:57,141 But the vindication came when the judge stood up 778 00:33:57,219 --> 00:34:00,846 And said, "this woman has done nothing wrong. 779 00:34:00,881 --> 00:34:04,532 You guys have come after her. She has done nothing. 780 00:34:04,609 --> 00:34:07,769 She has done everything and more that you have asked. 781 00:34:07,804 --> 00:34:09,962 Today, this is--ends." 782 00:34:09,964 --> 00:34:11,697 Once the fight was over, 783 00:34:11,775 --> 00:34:14,793 I moved and I left the state, and I never went back. 784 00:34:14,869 --> 00:34:17,312 I never wanted my daughter 785 00:34:17,388 --> 00:34:20,815 To endure the judgment that I had to endure. 786 00:34:20,892 --> 00:34:23,301 And I never wanted to raise another child 787 00:34:23,378 --> 00:34:29,733 In that town, in that mindset, in that environment. 788 00:34:34,064 --> 00:34:37,649 Y-yes, does she know? Yeah. Yeah. She does. 789 00:34:37,725 --> 00:34:42,470 Does she resent me some? Yeah, she does. 790 00:34:42,505 --> 00:34:45,957 I mean, you know, even though everything we've talked about, 791 00:34:45,992 --> 00:34:49,410 You know, I could not help that people did what they did, 792 00:34:49,487 --> 00:34:54,508 But...She resents it, me. 793 00:35:03,193 --> 00:35:04,893 Mm-hmm. 794 00:35:06,087 --> 00:35:08,713 [chuckles] yeah. It sucks. 795 00:35:08,790 --> 00:35:12,684 It's the textbook of a blessing and a curse. 796 00:35:12,760 --> 00:35:16,338 People are, you know, it-- 797 00:35:16,373 --> 00:35:20,200 People are--people are terrible. 798 00:35:25,866 --> 00:35:27,374 [cries] 799 00:35:28,776 --> 00:35:30,443 It's not... [chuckles] 800 00:35:30,520 --> 00:35:33,964 It's like, just I'm sorry. 801 00:35:35,283 --> 00:35:36,591 [sniffles] 802 00:35:43,049 --> 00:35:46,050 ♪♪ 803 00:35:46,203 --> 00:35:48,227 Why do we judge? 804 00:35:48,229 --> 00:35:49,988 Why don't we just tell every woman, 805 00:35:50,064 --> 00:35:52,465 Like, "you're beautiful" and be happy for them 806 00:35:52,542 --> 00:35:53,808 And genuinely happy, 807 00:35:53,843 --> 00:35:57,236 And if you're not, just-- just go your own way? 808 00:35:57,238 --> 00:35:58,513 I don't know, 809 00:35:58,589 --> 00:36:02,475 And I think playboy definitely brings out that question. 810 00:36:02,552 --> 00:36:04,970 As soon as someone finds out that I have been in "playboy," 811 00:36:05,005 --> 00:36:07,088 There's an immediate judgment there. 812 00:36:07,165 --> 00:36:08,974 ♪♪ 813 00:36:09,009 --> 00:36:11,175 People are uncomfortable with nudity, you know, 814 00:36:11,252 --> 00:36:12,760 And it's--it's--that's why 815 00:36:12,837 --> 00:36:14,104 They're uncomfortable with "playboy." 816 00:36:14,180 --> 00:36:16,180 They think because I showed my body, 817 00:36:16,257 --> 00:36:18,383 That means I act a certain way. 818 00:36:18,418 --> 00:36:20,676 You know? I showed my body. 819 00:36:20,678 --> 00:36:23,104 But meanwhile, I'm in college studying 820 00:36:23,139 --> 00:36:24,680 To be a veterinarian, a senior. 821 00:36:24,682 --> 00:36:27,942 You know, I--now I have children. I am a wife. 822 00:36:28,019 --> 00:36:31,112 Yes, I showed my body, too, at one point, but there--it's-- 823 00:36:31,189 --> 00:36:32,747 The two--it's not related. 824 00:36:32,857 --> 00:36:35,424 You know, you posed for "playboy," showed your body, 825 00:36:35,502 --> 00:36:39,454 But then there's also a whole nother human being behind that. 826 00:36:39,530 --> 00:36:42,407 Jill: Once I posed for "playboy" and I was on the show, 827 00:36:42,442 --> 00:36:44,692 I was no longer jill scott. 828 00:36:44,769 --> 00:36:48,955 I was now jill that posed naked. 829 00:36:49,032 --> 00:36:51,132 It's so wrong. 830 00:36:51,209 --> 00:36:53,025 ♪♪ 831 00:36:53,103 --> 00:36:55,636 Should we really be able to offer 832 00:36:55,713 --> 00:36:59,382 This much of an opinion on someone else's life? 833 00:36:59,384 --> 00:37:02,427 Like, this is an inside job. Like, at a certain point, 834 00:37:02,462 --> 00:37:05,764 We need to start taking a look at what's in here. 835 00:37:05,799 --> 00:37:08,266 Like, maybe we should learn to criticize ourselves 836 00:37:08,301 --> 00:37:12,303 A little more and less with someone else. 837 00:37:12,380 --> 00:37:16,650 ♪♪ 838 00:37:20,430 --> 00:37:21,796 ♪♪ 839 00:37:21,831 --> 00:37:23,389 Lauren: I mean, I credit hef and playboy absolutely 840 00:37:23,467 --> 00:37:28,136 For changing my image of myself for the better. 841 00:37:28,171 --> 00:37:30,789 I mean, 'cause it has stayed with me ever since then. 842 00:37:30,824 --> 00:37:34,275 Woman: So, like, are you missing, like, school and work 843 00:37:34,353 --> 00:37:35,751 And all that stuff right now? 844 00:37:35,753 --> 00:37:37,737 Oh, yeah, I'm a senior and I'm in veterinary medicine, 845 00:37:37,739 --> 00:37:39,172 And I'm missing two weeks of school, 846 00:37:39,249 --> 00:37:41,265 Which was really hard. 847 00:37:41,267 --> 00:37:42,634 My organic chemistry professor-- 848 00:37:42,669 --> 00:37:44,243 He told me he was gonna fail me. I said... 849 00:37:44,321 --> 00:37:45,971 -Shut up. -..."all right, bye." 850 00:37:46,006 --> 00:37:49,307 Yes, and he did fail me. 851 00:37:49,342 --> 00:37:52,660 Because I failed that class, I did not go back to school. 852 00:37:52,695 --> 00:37:55,254 ♪♪ 853 00:37:55,332 --> 00:37:57,022 I just kind of saw myself, 854 00:37:57,024 --> 00:37:59,067 My life going in a different direction 855 00:37:59,102 --> 00:38:00,284 Than what it was. 856 00:38:00,361 --> 00:38:03,154 My dream was to--I wanted-- I loved animals. 857 00:38:03,189 --> 00:38:05,873 I wanted to take care of animals, help animals. 858 00:38:05,950 --> 00:38:07,767 And so, my parents and my family actually 859 00:38:07,844 --> 00:38:10,996 Helped me realize that being in the public eye, 860 00:38:11,031 --> 00:38:12,864 I could help animals even more. 861 00:38:12,899 --> 00:38:16,217 When I became a playmate, peta asked what I could do, 862 00:38:16,294 --> 00:38:17,836 And so I used to go to capitol hill 863 00:38:17,871 --> 00:38:20,872 In a lettuce bikini and pass out 864 00:38:20,948 --> 00:38:24,058 Veggie dogs to all the congresspeople. 865 00:38:24,135 --> 00:38:25,093 It was amazing. 866 00:38:25,203 --> 00:38:27,812 I worked with playboy until I was-- 867 00:38:27,889 --> 00:38:30,882 My last job, I was pregnant with my first son, 868 00:38:30,958 --> 00:38:33,660 So, um, until 2012. 869 00:38:33,736 --> 00:38:37,630 I got married, and, um, I stopped working for playboy 870 00:38:37,707 --> 00:38:39,223 And just, uh, had children. 871 00:38:39,300 --> 00:38:41,634 I have a 10-year-old son and a 6-year-old son, 872 00:38:41,711 --> 00:38:44,412 And I take care of them every day. 873 00:38:44,489 --> 00:38:47,081 ♪♪ 874 00:38:47,158 --> 00:38:49,308 After I decided to leave the show, 875 00:38:49,386 --> 00:38:52,053 When I got home, I felt sad. 876 00:38:52,088 --> 00:38:54,497 There's a part of me that wished 877 00:38:54,499 --> 00:38:56,524 That I would have stayed 878 00:38:56,601 --> 00:39:00,995 And that I could have overcome that anxiety. 879 00:39:01,030 --> 00:39:02,914 So, I wrote hef a letter 880 00:39:02,990 --> 00:39:04,883 Letting him know that I was regretful, 881 00:39:04,918 --> 00:39:08,436 And he later asked me if I would test to be a playmate. 882 00:39:08,513 --> 00:39:13,224 And I got to a point where I felt proud 883 00:39:13,226 --> 00:39:16,694 To have the opportunity to be a "playboy" playmate. 884 00:39:16,771 --> 00:39:18,997 ♪♪ 885 00:39:19,032 --> 00:39:21,849 I was April 2003 centerfold 886 00:39:21,926 --> 00:39:25,203 And playmate of the year 2004. 887 00:39:25,279 --> 00:39:28,614 Posing nude is liberating. 888 00:39:28,616 --> 00:39:30,791 I did it then, and I would do it now. 889 00:39:30,868 --> 00:39:36,205 It is empowering. You're making a choice for you, 890 00:39:36,207 --> 00:39:39,767 And...I felt good about it. 891 00:39:39,802 --> 00:39:42,770 I did playboy for a reason. 892 00:39:42,847 --> 00:39:43,771 It was a platform. 893 00:39:43,773 --> 00:39:46,490 I utilized it to get every job that I could, 894 00:39:46,568 --> 00:39:50,978 And that's why I feel like it's easy for people to look back 895 00:39:51,055 --> 00:39:53,931 And rake everyone over the coals. 896 00:39:53,933 --> 00:39:55,934 Uh, my experience was different. 897 00:39:55,969 --> 00:40:00,105 I met my husband at the time through playboy, 898 00:40:00,140 --> 00:40:03,048 Which was another great gift. 899 00:40:03,126 --> 00:40:07,887 And most important, I had four amazing, beautiful children. 900 00:40:07,997 --> 00:40:09,981 ♪♪ 901 00:40:10,057 --> 00:40:12,217 Playboy was not my dream, 902 00:40:12,252 --> 00:40:14,076 But falling into it so gracefully 903 00:40:14,154 --> 00:40:18,072 Has turned it into... My life is a dream. 904 00:40:18,107 --> 00:40:20,158 I really love where I've landed, 905 00:40:20,234 --> 00:40:22,477 And I don't think I would have met my husband 906 00:40:22,512 --> 00:40:24,796 Or the friends that I've made. 907 00:40:24,831 --> 00:40:26,781 I have been to so many countries. 908 00:40:26,857 --> 00:40:28,650 I don't think that that would have ever happened 909 00:40:28,685 --> 00:40:30,442 If I had just stayed in las vegas 910 00:40:30,553 --> 00:40:32,253 And not been discovered. 911 00:40:32,330 --> 00:40:35,006 I think this world could have potentially 912 00:40:35,041 --> 00:40:36,266 Chewed me up and spit me out 913 00:40:36,342 --> 00:40:39,260 If I didn't get tougher skin and I didn't get thrown 914 00:40:39,295 --> 00:40:41,103 In a couple different situations 915 00:40:41,105 --> 00:40:42,355 That made me a little more well-rounded. 916 00:40:42,432 --> 00:40:47,276 And I-I love who I am today. 917 00:40:47,278 --> 00:40:49,103 So, today I am married. 918 00:40:49,180 --> 00:40:51,939 I've been married for 13 years. I had another child. 919 00:40:52,016 --> 00:40:54,283 He's 12. 920 00:40:54,285 --> 00:40:56,535 Oh, my gosh, so happy. 921 00:40:56,537 --> 00:41:01,266 After all these years and all these lessons, I'm really happy. 922 00:41:01,301 --> 00:41:04,502 I am at a place in life where I know me. 923 00:41:04,537 --> 00:41:08,206 I love me, and I-I love life. 924 00:41:08,208 --> 00:41:12,727 I'm not gonna shrink. I'm gonna do the opposite, you know? 925 00:41:12,803 --> 00:41:15,304 Honestly, I found my power in playboy. 926 00:41:15,306 --> 00:41:18,457 You know, I found, like, my power 927 00:41:18,535 --> 00:41:20,034 The way I wanted to be seen. 928 00:41:20,069 --> 00:41:23,312 ♪♪ 929 00:41:23,314 --> 00:41:27,525 I remember some of the things from the boardroom 930 00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:29,009 And some of the body comments, 931 00:41:29,087 --> 00:41:32,880 And today that would not be accepted. 932 00:41:32,915 --> 00:41:36,050 Not only do I not think the show would be able to be made today, 933 00:41:36,085 --> 00:41:40,538 I think they would cancel everyone that was part of it. 934 00:41:40,573 --> 00:41:43,591 ♪♪ 935 00:41:43,626 --> 00:41:44,733 De olveira: There's a reason why 936 00:41:44,811 --> 00:41:47,695 "playboy" magazine is now extinct, 937 00:41:47,772 --> 00:41:49,088 And what is the next iteration? 938 00:41:49,090 --> 00:41:50,406 I don't think anybody really knows, 939 00:41:50,483 --> 00:41:54,902 Um, but the business of exploitation 940 00:41:54,979 --> 00:41:55,936 Is not going away. 941 00:41:56,013 --> 00:41:58,223 Um, it's just done in a different form. 942 00:41:58,258 --> 00:42:00,666 Do you believe there was any time 943 00:42:00,744 --> 00:42:02,668 That you might have exploited women? 944 00:42:02,746 --> 00:42:06,188 Never. Never, and I think you-- you could talk to the women 945 00:42:06,190 --> 00:42:07,398 Who have appeared in the magazine, 946 00:42:07,433 --> 00:42:10,585 And I think you would hear rather clearly that's the case. 947 00:42:10,620 --> 00:42:12,587 You know, they say, "oh, you're being exploited." 948 00:42:12,622 --> 00:42:14,422 I'm like, I'm not being exploited 949 00:42:14,457 --> 00:42:16,699 If hugh hefner thinks I'm attractive enough 950 00:42:16,701 --> 00:42:19,184 To put me in his magazine, and I get paid. It's a job. 951 00:42:19,262 --> 00:42:22,780 That's something that I never understood of how people judge. 952 00:42:22,857 --> 00:42:25,566 We're choosing to do it. We wanna do it. 953 00:42:25,568 --> 00:42:27,952 You know, we find it beautiful. We find it sexy. 954 00:42:27,987 --> 00:42:30,304 We find it attractive. 955 00:42:30,381 --> 00:42:32,006 Why is that exploitation? 956 00:42:37,913 --> 00:42:39,781 [scoffs] I don't know, right? 957 00:42:39,816 --> 00:42:43,392 I posed nude and felt comfortable with it, 958 00:42:43,394 --> 00:42:45,787 But people do. They lose their mind. 959 00:42:45,822 --> 00:42:47,655 It is wild. 960 00:42:47,732 --> 00:42:50,999 There's nothing wrong with following a dream. 961 00:42:51,001 --> 00:42:53,403 There's nothing wrong with being naked. 962 00:42:53,479 --> 00:42:56,405 I just think it's a way to shame women, you know? 963 00:42:56,407 --> 00:42:59,908 But that's their problem, not mine.