1
00:00:34,046 --> 00:00:36,880
[thrilling orchestral music playing]
2
00:00:36,963 --> 00:00:39,046
[narrator] Four years ago,
Nick and Audrey Spitz
3
00:00:39,130 --> 00:00:42,380
solved some of the most
high-profile murders of the century.
4
00:00:42,880 --> 00:00:43,963
-[music continues]
-[gasps]
5
00:00:46,505 --> 00:00:47,796
[Audrey] Oh my God! Oh my God!
6
00:00:48,713 --> 00:00:50,880
-Should we pull it out?
-No, it's a foot-long knife.
7
00:00:50,963 --> 00:00:52,421
-[all screaming]
-I'll put it back in.
8
00:00:52,505 --> 00:00:54,880
-Don't put it back.
-[all moaning and yelling]
9
00:00:54,963 --> 00:00:57,088
[narrator]
Like many overnight success stories,
10
00:00:57,171 --> 00:00:59,671
Nick and Audrey
immediately quit their jobs
11
00:00:59,755 --> 00:01:01,421
and poured their life savings
12
00:01:01,505 --> 00:01:04,380
into pursuing a career
as private investigators.
13
00:01:04,463 --> 00:01:05,713
-[loud crunching]
-[Audrey] Hmm.
14
00:01:06,463 --> 00:01:07,421
Uh…
15
00:01:07,505 --> 00:01:09,046
-Yeah.
-Would you excuse me?
16
00:01:09,130 --> 00:01:10,713
Mm. Yes, not a problem.
17
00:01:10,796 --> 00:01:12,171
[crunching continues]
18
00:01:12,255 --> 00:01:14,463
Are you kidding me right now
with those potato chips?
19
00:01:14,546 --> 00:01:18,046
Are you seriously yelling at me?
I watched you eat two shrimp cocktails.
20
00:01:18,130 --> 00:01:20,630
Stop distracting me. Okay?
21
00:01:20,713 --> 00:01:23,005
[narrator] Unfortunately,
it's not going very well.
22
00:01:23,088 --> 00:01:26,588
Men get to a certain stage in their life.
It's nothing to do with you.
23
00:01:26,671 --> 00:01:28,088
Not all men.
24
00:01:28,171 --> 00:01:30,213
-No, but--
-Don't get mad at me for this.
25
00:01:30,296 --> 00:01:33,130
-[door closes]
-[woman] You've been cheating on me, Ron.
26
00:01:33,213 --> 00:01:36,005
-Really? After 25 years?
-[sighs]
27
00:01:36,088 --> 00:01:37,130
[Ron] Baby…
28
00:01:37,213 --> 00:01:40,671
I've been going out on my own so I could
plan a surprise wedding anniversary.
29
00:01:40,755 --> 00:01:42,338
-No, that's so sweet!
-That's…
30
00:01:42,421 --> 00:01:44,921
-[Ron] Come on. I love you.
-I'm so sorry.
31
00:01:45,005 --> 00:01:46,671
Excuse us, you guys.
32
00:01:46,755 --> 00:01:48,796
If you don't mind just paying this bill,
33
00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:50,921
we'll be out of your lovebuggin' hair.
34
00:01:51,005 --> 00:01:52,880
-A bill? You're billing her?
-Yeah, no.
35
00:01:52,963 --> 00:01:53,963
We made a deal--
36
00:01:54,046 --> 00:01:55,088
You were hitting on me!
37
00:01:55,171 --> 00:01:56,421
-I was undercover.
-Pretend--
38
00:01:56,505 --> 00:01:57,963
This keeps getting better and better.
39
00:01:58,046 --> 00:02:00,171
[narrator] With business struggling,
Nick and Audrey
40
00:02:00,255 --> 00:02:01,546
could only pray for a miracle…
41
00:02:01,630 --> 00:02:02,546
You better run!
42
00:02:02,630 --> 00:02:04,380
…that someone close to them
43
00:02:04,463 --> 00:02:05,630
would be killed.
44
00:02:11,463 --> 00:02:14,880
[soft high-pitched sounds echoing]
45
00:02:14,963 --> 00:02:18,005
[low snorting, moaning]
46
00:02:18,088 --> 00:02:19,505
Oh God!
47
00:02:20,588 --> 00:02:21,671
Honey, honey, honey. Hey!
48
00:02:22,255 --> 00:02:24,296
Can't you put on beach waves
or something nice?
49
00:02:24,380 --> 00:02:26,838
[Nick] The whale noises
help me fall asleep.
50
00:02:26,921 --> 00:02:29,213
-You took away my Ambien, so…
-[Audrey] You know why?
51
00:02:29,296 --> 00:02:31,171
Remember the last time you took Ambien?
52
00:02:31,255 --> 00:02:33,171
You went sleepwalking into the lobby
53
00:02:33,255 --> 00:02:36,171
wearing my underwear, and then
you started watering the couch.
54
00:02:36,255 --> 00:02:37,796
I don't remember doing that.
55
00:02:37,880 --> 00:02:40,046
Look. Doorman took a picture.
It's my screen saver.
56
00:02:41,130 --> 00:02:43,296
-Uh, that's somebody else.
-[Audrey] Okay.
57
00:02:43,380 --> 00:02:47,546
Listen, baby, if you can't sleep, um,
58
00:02:48,463 --> 00:02:49,921
we could try to, uh,
59
00:02:50,630 --> 00:02:52,880
knock out a chapter together.
60
00:02:52,963 --> 00:02:54,088
[Nick] I read a few pages.
61
00:02:54,171 --> 00:02:56,213
That guy doesn't know
what he's talking about.
62
00:02:56,296 --> 00:02:58,505
[Audrey] Honey, this is the guy
that wrote the test.
63
00:02:58,588 --> 00:03:00,588
The test you need to take to get licensed.
64
00:03:00,671 --> 00:03:01,671
[Nick] I was a real cop.
65
00:03:01,755 --> 00:03:04,296
I don't need some piece of paper
telling me I know what I'm doing.
66
00:03:04,380 --> 00:03:05,380
I know what I'm doing!
67
00:03:05,463 --> 00:03:08,088
But we both agreed
that it would help our business
68
00:03:08,171 --> 00:03:10,213
if we just, you know, took the course.
69
00:03:10,296 --> 00:03:12,963
Do you really think our business
is struggling because of that?
70
00:03:13,046 --> 00:03:16,005
I think we would get better clientele
if both of us were licensed.
71
00:03:16,088 --> 00:03:18,630
Only way to get better clientele
is better marketing.
72
00:03:18,713 --> 00:03:21,338
Better marketing?
Like your floss business cards?
73
00:03:21,421 --> 00:03:23,588
-Yes.
-[Audrey] Seriously? God!
74
00:03:23,671 --> 00:03:25,630
It's called "disruptive marketing."
75
00:03:25,713 --> 00:03:28,880
It's not disruptive. It's confusing.
We're not dentists. We're--
76
00:03:28,963 --> 00:03:30,005
[whale noises start up]
77
00:03:30,088 --> 00:03:31,963
I can talk louder than the sound machine.
78
00:03:32,046 --> 00:03:33,796
-[volume increasing]
-[Audrey] Honey, come on!
79
00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:35,046
[Nick] Fine. Forget it.
80
00:03:36,046 --> 00:03:37,546
Do you not wanna do this anymore?
81
00:03:38,130 --> 00:03:40,088
I do. I wanna do this. It's just…
82
00:03:40,171 --> 00:03:42,463
It's all we ever do is talk about work.
83
00:03:43,088 --> 00:03:46,880
Do you know any couples who also
work together that actually get along?
84
00:03:47,463 --> 00:03:49,546
Billie Eilish and Finneas.
85
00:03:49,630 --> 00:03:50,671
They're brother and sister.
86
00:03:50,755 --> 00:03:54,546
Look, baby, I know this isn't
what we pictured when we got into this--
87
00:03:54,630 --> 00:03:56,380
[cell phone playing Indian hip-hop music]
88
00:03:56,463 --> 00:03:58,005
What the hell is that?
89
00:03:58,088 --> 00:03:59,588
Uh, it's my phone.
90
00:03:59,671 --> 00:04:02,671
[phone continues ringing and vibrating]
91
00:04:02,755 --> 00:04:06,088
Yo! Rajah! Namaste. What's up, my brother?
92
00:04:06,171 --> 00:04:09,046
[Maharajah]
Yo! What are you doing, Nicky Nick?
93
00:04:09,130 --> 00:04:11,921
Are you mowing your lawn or something?
What do I hear right now?
94
00:04:12,005 --> 00:04:15,505
Yo, I'm chillin' on a Jet Ski, dog!
[laughs]
95
00:04:15,588 --> 00:04:18,088
On a Jet Ski and on the phone
at the same time?
96
00:04:18,171 --> 00:04:20,505
[Maharajah] Yo, Nick.
Broski. My brosephus.
97
00:04:20,588 --> 00:04:23,546
The Maharajah is getting married!
98
00:04:24,130 --> 00:04:26,546
Oh, that's incredible!
99
00:04:26,630 --> 00:04:28,671
Let me tell Audrey. Audrey!
100
00:04:28,755 --> 00:04:29,880
He's getting married.
101
00:04:29,963 --> 00:04:31,255
-What?
-[Nick] Oh yeah.
102
00:04:31,755 --> 00:04:35,588
Vik! Congratulations!
We're so happy for you!
103
00:04:35,671 --> 00:04:38,963
Thank you! She's a dime piece from Paris.
104
00:04:39,046 --> 00:04:41,546
You know,
where the Eiffel Tower is and shit.
105
00:04:41,630 --> 00:04:44,880
I'm getting married this weekend
on my new private island.
106
00:04:44,963 --> 00:04:47,796
I want you and Nick to come,
all expenses paid.
107
00:04:47,880 --> 00:04:52,463
I need to see you two ballers
out on the dance floor busting a nut!
108
00:04:52,546 --> 00:04:54,255
"Busting a move," you mean.
109
00:04:54,338 --> 00:04:55,171
Nah, dude, I got…
110
00:04:55,255 --> 00:04:56,546
Oh shit!
111
00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:57,963
[yells]
112
00:04:58,046 --> 00:04:59,755
-[line disconnects]
-What's happening?
113
00:04:59,838 --> 00:05:01,671
Did you hear "all-expenses-paid"?
114
00:05:01,755 --> 00:05:05,713
-We have to work this weekend.
-I gotta say, I could use a getaway.
115
00:05:05,796 --> 00:05:08,463
Remember what happened
last time we went on a getaway?
116
00:05:08,546 --> 00:05:10,380
Yeah, some people died.
117
00:05:10,463 --> 00:05:11,921
Not s-- A lot of people.
118
00:05:12,005 --> 00:05:13,671
You think five people dying's a lot?
119
00:05:13,755 --> 00:05:16,421
All right. Hold on.
Just gonna think for a second.
120
00:05:16,505 --> 00:05:18,130
-She's caving in.
-Okay, so…
121
00:05:18,630 --> 00:05:20,338
-She's caving in.
-Just wait.
122
00:05:20,421 --> 00:05:21,671
No. Go ahead.
123
00:05:21,755 --> 00:05:23,296
Okay, I do agree.
124
00:05:23,880 --> 00:05:26,296
I think we could both use
a little bit of a break.
125
00:05:26,380 --> 00:05:27,671
-A break?
-From all this.
126
00:05:27,755 --> 00:05:30,296
-Just no work for a minute, you know?
-Not--
127
00:05:30,380 --> 00:05:32,255
-It's--
-No. For at least a weekend.
128
00:05:32,338 --> 00:05:35,046
The whole weekend.
We can… Let's not… Let's just…
129
00:05:35,130 --> 00:05:36,755
Our minds need the no work.
130
00:05:36,838 --> 00:05:38,588
-I can't talk--
-I got chills! Goosebumps!
131
00:05:38,671 --> 00:05:40,296
'Cause we're gonna do this, aren't we?
132
00:05:40,380 --> 00:05:43,171
[dynamic music playing]
133
00:05:44,838 --> 00:05:47,838
-Wow. How about that. Mm-hmm.
-Such a good decision.
134
00:05:47,921 --> 00:05:50,255
You like the view, Mr. and Mrs. Shitz?
135
00:05:50,338 --> 00:05:53,005
Oh. You know what?
Excuse me. I'm so sorry. It's…
136
00:05:53,088 --> 00:05:55,880
We're Nick and Audrey Spitz. It's, um…
137
00:05:55,963 --> 00:05:58,255
But, yes, it's a gorgeous view.
138
00:05:58,338 --> 00:06:01,130
Would you like some music,
Mr. and Mrs. Shitz?
139
00:06:01,213 --> 00:06:04,630
We're the Spitzes not the Shitzes. Okay?
140
00:06:04,713 --> 00:06:08,255
Yes, I have some Pitbull
or, uh, Taylor Shitz.
141
00:06:08,338 --> 00:06:12,213
-Okay. He's sticking with the Shitz.
-Puts "Shitz" at the end of everything.
142
00:06:12,296 --> 00:06:13,546
Where are you from?
143
00:06:13,630 --> 00:06:16,588
I'm, uh, from the, uh… European!
144
00:06:16,671 --> 00:06:18,046
We're guessing Shitzerland?
145
00:06:18,130 --> 00:06:20,421
[both laughing]
146
00:06:20,505 --> 00:06:22,005
[laughing]
147
00:06:22,088 --> 00:06:25,296
♪ Ooh, girl, don't you stop
Tell your mom, girl ♪
148
00:06:25,380 --> 00:06:27,671
♪ And I won't stop it
Until you're mine, girl ♪
149
00:06:27,755 --> 00:06:29,713
♪ And you can't stop that
Until you're mine, girl ♪
150
00:06:29,796 --> 00:06:32,755
♪ And I can't find out what you want ♪
151
00:06:32,838 --> 00:06:35,921
♪ Tell your mom, girl, and I won't stop it
Until you're mine, girl ♪
152
00:06:36,005 --> 00:06:38,713
♪ And you can't stop that
Until you're mine, girl, ha ♪
153
00:06:38,796 --> 00:06:40,838
♪ Ooh, girl, don't you stop… ♪
154
00:06:40,921 --> 00:06:43,588
[Nick] Let me get off this.
What the heck? Thank you!
155
00:06:43,671 --> 00:06:45,713
[Audrey] This is unbelievable!
I'm gonna cry!
156
00:06:45,796 --> 00:06:49,213
-Did we die? Are we in heaven? What the--
-[gasps] This is so nice!
157
00:06:49,296 --> 00:06:52,755
The flamingos got diapers on
so they don't crap the lawn!
158
00:06:52,838 --> 00:06:53,713
[Audrey] Wow!
159
00:06:54,588 --> 00:06:56,588
[Vik shouting] Nick and Audrey!
160
00:06:56,671 --> 00:06:58,088
-Hey! My man!
-Hey, hey, hey!
161
00:06:58,171 --> 00:07:00,380
-Maharajah!
-[Vik] The heroes of Lake Como!
162
00:07:00,463 --> 00:07:04,671
And my sister and my brother
from another mother!
163
00:07:04,755 --> 00:07:06,213
-[continues exclaiming]
-[Audrey] Oh my God!
164
00:07:06,296 --> 00:07:09,005
-Hey! Oh my God!
-[all whooping]
165
00:07:09,088 --> 00:07:10,296
-[Nick] Look at you!
-Oh!
166
00:07:10,380 --> 00:07:14,213
Nick and Audrey, may I present to you
Mademoiselle Claudette Joubert.
167
00:07:14,296 --> 00:07:15,130
[in French] Joubert.
168
00:07:15,213 --> 00:07:18,255
[in English] I'm Audrey.
It is such a pleasure to meet you.
169
00:07:18,338 --> 00:07:20,505
You are more beautiful
than Vikram described.
170
00:07:20,588 --> 00:07:23,213
[Audrey] Oh! Oh. Oh.
171
00:07:23,296 --> 00:07:25,255
-That's funny. Got 'em all.
-Oh!
172
00:07:25,755 --> 00:07:27,171
Four? I thought it was two.
173
00:07:27,255 --> 00:07:28,421
And Nick.
174
00:07:28,505 --> 00:07:31,005
-I've been wanting to meet you.
-All right!
175
00:07:31,088 --> 00:07:32,505
Congratulations.
176
00:07:34,046 --> 00:07:38,088
Thank you. I appreciate that.
Yeah. I love it.
177
00:07:38,171 --> 00:07:40,463
-Okay! All right, stop!
-[Nick] What happened?
178
00:07:40,546 --> 00:07:42,213
[Audrey] Cut it out!
179
00:07:42,296 --> 00:07:43,296
[Claudette] Please, come.
180
00:07:43,380 --> 00:07:46,088
[Audrey] I have to tell you,
Paris is my favorite city in the world.
181
00:07:46,171 --> 00:07:49,838
-When was the last time you were there?
-Hmm. Oh, I've actually not been there.
182
00:07:49,921 --> 00:07:53,088
But I just know from the movies
and from the pictures and--
183
00:07:53,171 --> 00:07:56,296
[Nick] Hey, thanks for the wedding invite.
So happy you could squeeze us in.
184
00:07:56,380 --> 00:07:57,921
-[Vik] No, for sure, man!
-Unbelievable!
185
00:07:58,005 --> 00:07:59,796
We had extra seats 'cause my parents died.
186
00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:01,588
-Ooh! I'm--
-Oh! I'm so sorry.
187
00:08:01,671 --> 00:08:02,713
[Nick] That's terrible.
188
00:08:02,796 --> 00:08:04,963
[laughs] No! I'm just kidding!
189
00:08:05,046 --> 00:08:07,213
Oh, okay. So, they're coming?
190
00:08:07,296 --> 00:08:10,421
Uh, no, they died,
but they were never gonna come.
191
00:08:11,213 --> 00:08:12,255
'Cause I hated them.
192
00:08:12,338 --> 00:08:14,838
-There you go. All right. That's--
-Okay.
193
00:08:14,921 --> 00:08:17,796
Oh. Colonel, you know the Spitzes.
194
00:08:17,880 --> 00:08:19,338
-What?
-Colonel!
195
00:08:19,421 --> 00:08:20,630
My friends!
196
00:08:20,713 --> 00:08:22,880
-My God!
-Oh my God. What happened to your arm?
197
00:08:23,546 --> 00:08:25,171
Is it that noticeable?
198
00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:29,005
Last time we saw you,
you had a lot more of… of your arm.
199
00:08:29,088 --> 00:08:32,588
Well, if I had to lose one,
that would be the one to lose
200
00:08:32,671 --> 00:08:34,755
because it's already missing a hand.
201
00:08:34,838 --> 00:08:37,546
You don't have to share the armrest now
at the movie theater.
202
00:08:37,630 --> 00:08:40,463
-[all chuckle]
-Yo, yo, yo. But real talk.
203
00:08:40,546 --> 00:08:43,630
The Colonel stopped a bullet
meant for me in Mumbai.
204
00:08:43,713 --> 00:08:45,588
-You kidding?
-Somebody tried to shoot you?
205
00:08:45,671 --> 00:08:48,588
Yeah. Some people don't like
the way my company does business.
206
00:08:48,671 --> 00:08:52,546
Sadly, the Colonel's injury stops him
from protecting me to the fullest,
207
00:08:52,630 --> 00:08:54,546
so I had to get me a new head bodyguard.
208
00:08:54,630 --> 00:08:55,880
Mr. Louis!
209
00:08:55,963 --> 00:08:58,130
-Check it out, right?
-[Audrey] Hello, Louis!
210
00:08:58,213 --> 00:09:00,088
And, yo, my man is fully armed.
211
00:09:00,171 --> 00:09:02,005
[Nick] He's fully armed. That's funny!
212
00:09:02,088 --> 00:09:04,630
Okay. I hope
you don't find anything in there.
213
00:09:04,713 --> 00:09:06,671
-I hope not!
-[all laugh]
214
00:09:06,755 --> 00:09:07,755
I hate to say it.
215
00:09:07,838 --> 00:09:11,088
If you and the Colonel are ever caught
in a fight, my money's on the Colonel.
216
00:09:11,171 --> 00:09:14,421
He'd open a can of whoop ass
with his, uh… with his good arm.
217
00:09:14,505 --> 00:09:16,630
No? You didn't like that one?
I was joking around.
218
00:09:16,713 --> 00:09:17,963
-Nice to meet you.
-Let's go.
219
00:09:18,046 --> 00:09:18,880
Follow me.
220
00:09:18,963 --> 00:09:19,963
[Nick] Coming. Coming.
221
00:09:22,088 --> 00:09:23,588
[gentle music playing]
222
00:09:25,171 --> 00:09:26,088
[Nick] Sounds great!
223
00:09:26,171 --> 00:09:29,005
[Claudette] I'm assuming you've never been
to an Indian wedding before.
224
00:09:29,088 --> 00:09:31,630
-[laughing] Why would you assume that?
-Oh, so you have?
225
00:09:31,713 --> 00:09:32,755
Uh, no.
226
00:09:32,838 --> 00:09:37,005
So tonight is the Sangeet.
It's like a rehearsal dinner.
227
00:09:37,088 --> 00:09:41,630
And then we have, um, a very dramatic
surprise entrance plan
228
00:09:41,713 --> 00:09:43,755
that I think you'll find
quite entertaining.
229
00:09:43,838 --> 00:09:45,671
-[phone rings]
-[Claudette] I need to take this.
230
00:09:45,755 --> 00:09:48,713
Your villa should have everything
you need. Make yourselves at home.
231
00:09:50,171 --> 00:09:51,255
-And we--
-Bye! Enjoy!
232
00:09:51,338 --> 00:09:53,088
-Bye. Thank you.
-No more kisses. Cool.
233
00:09:53,171 --> 00:09:56,963
[sighs] She was working in a watch shop
off La Place Vendôme when I met her.
234
00:09:57,046 --> 00:09:58,088
Not a penny to her name.
235
00:09:58,171 --> 00:10:00,130
Love at first sight, you know what I mean?
236
00:10:00,213 --> 00:10:02,005
She just fills me with like… [grunts]
237
00:10:02,088 --> 00:10:03,671
-With happiness.
-[Nick] That's nice.
238
00:10:03,755 --> 00:10:05,505
I see that same happiness in you two
239
00:10:05,588 --> 00:10:07,005
when you look at each other.
240
00:10:08,046 --> 00:10:09,880
You guys are happy, right?
241
00:10:09,963 --> 00:10:12,255
-Us? Are you kidding?
-Without her, I would not be happy.
242
00:10:12,338 --> 00:10:15,088
-With her, I'm the happiest.
-Not a day goes by where I just wanna go…
243
00:10:15,171 --> 00:10:16,671
[grunts] I love you so much.
244
00:10:16,755 --> 00:10:19,505
She makes every decision for us,
and I'm fine with that.
245
00:10:19,588 --> 00:10:22,505
-Now get in there and have fun, all right?
-[Nick] Thank you so much.
246
00:10:22,588 --> 00:10:24,546
-[Vik] Enjoy yourself.
-Okay. Oh, so we…
247
00:10:24,630 --> 00:10:26,546
-Okay. Bye, buddy!
-[Vik] Louis, let's go.
248
00:10:26,630 --> 00:10:28,630
["Weekend Friend" by Goth Babe playing]
249
00:10:30,546 --> 00:10:33,880
Oh my God!
250
00:10:37,421 --> 00:10:40,005
I mean, goddamn.
251
00:10:40,088 --> 00:10:41,505
Goddamn!
252
00:10:41,588 --> 00:10:43,588
Look at this! Oh my God!
253
00:10:43,671 --> 00:10:45,796
-[Nick] Look at this! This!
-[Audrey] Wow!
254
00:10:45,880 --> 00:10:49,588
-[Nick] Babe, the TV's gigantic!
-Oh my God.
255
00:10:49,671 --> 00:10:51,463
-[Nick] Look at this thing!
-[beeps]
256
00:10:51,546 --> 00:10:53,296
-[whirring]
-Huh?
257
00:10:56,213 --> 00:10:57,088
What?!
258
00:10:57,630 --> 00:10:58,796
[laughing] Oh!
259
00:10:58,880 --> 00:11:00,546
We got a convertible, baby!
260
00:11:00,630 --> 00:11:03,171
Put this… in your face.
261
00:11:03,255 --> 00:11:04,171
[Nick] Mm-hmm.
262
00:11:05,213 --> 00:11:06,421
Is this unicorn cheese?
263
00:11:06,505 --> 00:11:08,838
-Oh my God. Baby, a gift box.
-Okay.
264
00:11:08,921 --> 00:11:11,880
I'm gonna go with one more
piece of cheese, then I'm done with this.
265
00:11:11,963 --> 00:11:13,963
-[Audrey] What? Are these for us?
-[Nick] Earrings?
266
00:11:14,046 --> 00:11:15,880
-[Audrey] Oh!
-These are good ones, aren't they?
267
00:11:15,963 --> 00:11:17,130
I cannot believe this!
268
00:11:17,213 --> 00:11:19,463
-We get our own iPhones!
-No way!
269
00:11:19,546 --> 00:11:22,005
-What did we give out at our wedding?
-Oh, flip-flops!
270
00:11:22,088 --> 00:11:24,546
Flip-flops,
and we gave out Advil or some shit?
271
00:11:24,630 --> 00:11:26,755
-Vintage Air Jordans?
-[Audrey] This is insane!
272
00:11:26,838 --> 00:11:27,671
[Nick] My size?
273
00:11:27,755 --> 00:11:31,588
Wouldn't be a gift box from the Maharajah
if it didn't have something kinky in it.
274
00:11:31,671 --> 00:11:33,880
-Those are gonna get you in trouble.
-You promise?
275
00:11:33,963 --> 00:11:37,463
-Oh! I like that response. Okay.
-Hey!
276
00:11:37,546 --> 00:11:38,588
-What?
-[Nick] Okay.
277
00:11:39,088 --> 00:11:40,005
[Audrey] Wait.
278
00:11:40,088 --> 00:11:41,880
We just… This has just happened.
279
00:11:41,963 --> 00:11:44,171
-How'd they do that so fast?
-It's incredible.
280
00:11:44,255 --> 00:11:46,713
[Audrey] Honey! It says "Nick and Audrey"!
281
00:11:47,463 --> 00:11:51,130
-Oh my God! You gotta come in this bed!
-[Nick] I'm coming, baby!
282
00:11:51,213 --> 00:11:53,880
-[Audrey] Oh!
-[Nick] I'm coming! I'm coming! Hey!
283
00:11:53,963 --> 00:11:55,088
Oh my God!
284
00:11:55,171 --> 00:11:56,380
Ow! Baby!
285
00:11:56,463 --> 00:11:57,505
-Oh!
-Oh!
286
00:11:57,588 --> 00:11:58,963
-Oh gosh.
-All right. What?
287
00:11:59,630 --> 00:12:01,963
I don't know
if I packed appropriately for this event.
288
00:12:02,046 --> 00:12:03,546
-I gotta check.
-I'm coming with!
289
00:12:03,630 --> 00:12:07,046
-[Audrey] I gotta check.
-[Nick] I'm coming with! Let's go!
290
00:12:07,880 --> 00:12:08,713
[gasps]
291
00:12:09,546 --> 00:12:10,380
Oh!
292
00:12:12,255 --> 00:12:14,630
-Oh my God!
-Okay, that's good.
293
00:12:14,713 --> 00:12:16,255
That's your stuff. Yeah.
294
00:12:16,338 --> 00:12:17,296
Do you see this?
295
00:12:17,380 --> 00:12:18,963
-I've never seen anything--
-All right.
296
00:12:30,546 --> 00:12:32,880
-[Audrey] Baby, you look so handsome.
-I…
297
00:12:32,963 --> 00:12:35,088
I can't believe you pulled that off.
298
00:12:35,171 --> 00:12:37,713
-Well, I'm gonna pull that off.
-[Audrey] Let's go.
299
00:12:37,796 --> 00:12:39,755
[Nick] Please tell me
you're gonna keep that.
300
00:12:39,838 --> 00:12:42,088
["Khadke Glassy
(from "Jabariya Jodi")" playing]
301
00:12:42,171 --> 00:12:43,213
Oh my God!
302
00:12:46,671 --> 00:12:48,505
-[Audrey] Hi!
-[Nick] Hey, how are ya?
303
00:12:53,963 --> 00:12:55,130
Audrey!
304
00:12:55,213 --> 00:12:57,005
-[Audrey] Ah, Colonel!
-[Nick] Hey.
305
00:12:57,088 --> 00:12:58,921
-Stunning!
-Thank you!
306
00:12:59,005 --> 00:13:00,880
Oh, how handsome are you, man?
307
00:13:00,963 --> 00:13:02,755
I only have eye for you, Nick.
308
00:13:02,838 --> 00:13:05,505
Oh! You better keep it that way!
All right!
309
00:13:10,296 --> 00:13:13,463
In a most beautiful place
on a most beautiful night,
310
00:13:13,546 --> 00:13:16,630
you have to be
the most beautiful thing of all.
311
00:13:16,713 --> 00:13:17,546
Um…
312
00:13:18,046 --> 00:13:21,755
Whoa. Okay. Definitely kissing
every single finger I have.
313
00:13:21,838 --> 00:13:24,130
I have made love
to more than 10,000 women.
314
00:13:24,213 --> 00:13:26,505
-[Audrey murmurs]
-None as ravishing as you.
315
00:13:26,588 --> 00:13:28,463
Okay. Well, speaking
of staggering numbers,
316
00:13:28,546 --> 00:13:31,046
this is my husband of 16 years.
317
00:13:31,130 --> 00:13:32,505
I've made love to one woman.
318
00:13:32,588 --> 00:13:35,380
-And I did it terribly, by the way.
-[Audrey] All right.
319
00:13:35,463 --> 00:13:39,130
Holy sh-- This is… You're that guy,
Francisco Perez, yeah?
320
00:13:39,213 --> 00:13:40,880
This guy used to be a soccer player.
321
00:13:40,963 --> 00:13:43,796
He headbutted some dude one time
and put him into a coma.
322
00:13:43,880 --> 00:13:47,505
Yeah. I know. I hit him so hard,
he lost his ability to blink.
323
00:13:48,421 --> 00:13:50,588
Anyway, it was so nice to meet you.
So, we're go--
324
00:13:50,671 --> 00:13:52,963
What about you?
How do you know the Maharajah?
325
00:13:53,046 --> 00:13:54,630
Well, after I retired from football,
326
00:13:54,713 --> 00:13:57,213
his father made me
the chairman of the board of directors
327
00:13:57,296 --> 00:13:58,630
of Shiz-Vik, his company.
328
00:13:58,713 --> 00:14:03,296
Also, I helped him land that beautiful
bride of his, the blonde. [chuckles]
329
00:14:03,796 --> 00:14:06,213
Although she has nothing
on this one. My God.
330
00:14:06,296 --> 00:14:07,421
-Okay.
-Okay.
331
00:14:07,505 --> 00:14:09,005
I'll see you in a second.
332
00:14:09,088 --> 00:14:11,921
$10,000, you can have one night with her.
333
00:14:12,005 --> 00:14:13,796
I'm kidding, you sick bastard.
334
00:14:14,296 --> 00:14:16,296
[pop music playing in background]
335
00:14:19,380 --> 00:14:21,088
[woman] That's quite the plate.
336
00:14:21,171 --> 00:14:23,588
Do they not have food where you come from?
337
00:14:24,088 --> 00:14:25,588
Oh, um…
338
00:14:26,213 --> 00:14:30,755
No, you know, I just… I'm so used
to my husband just eating off my plate,
339
00:14:30,838 --> 00:14:32,255
so it's sort of become a habit.
340
00:14:32,338 --> 00:14:34,713
But, no, you're absolutely right.
I don't need this.
341
00:14:34,796 --> 00:14:37,338
No, no, no! Don't put it back.
342
00:14:37,963 --> 00:14:39,963
-I was not gonna do that.
-[woman scoffs]
343
00:14:40,546 --> 00:14:41,588
Americans.
344
00:14:42,088 --> 00:14:44,171
[scoffs] Americans. [chuckles]
345
00:15:00,296 --> 00:15:01,546
Would you care for one?
346
00:15:02,338 --> 00:15:04,463
Oh, I'm so good.
Thank you. Maybe another time.
347
00:15:04,546 --> 00:15:05,546
[woman speaks Hindi]
348
00:15:06,171 --> 00:15:07,380
-[Audrey] So, um…
-Thank you.
349
00:15:07,463 --> 00:15:09,005
Are you on the bride's side?
350
00:15:09,088 --> 00:15:11,296
No, I'm Saira, groom's sister.
351
00:15:11,380 --> 00:15:14,046
I did not know Vik had a sister.
352
00:15:14,130 --> 00:15:15,338
Yeah. [chuckles]
353
00:15:16,171 --> 00:15:17,380
[Audrey groans]
354
00:15:17,463 --> 00:15:19,588
-These are very low tables!
-[chuckles]
355
00:15:20,380 --> 00:15:23,505
Are you reading 'cause you don't like
weddings like this, or…
356
00:15:23,588 --> 00:15:26,838
No, you know,
it's more that I don't like people.
357
00:15:26,921 --> 00:15:28,921
I mean, these people in particular.
358
00:15:29,005 --> 00:15:32,005
I guess as long as Claudette
and your brother have fun,
359
00:15:32,088 --> 00:15:33,255
that's all that matters.
360
00:15:33,338 --> 00:15:36,546
Right. I don't really understand
how anyone gets married.
361
00:15:36,630 --> 00:15:39,796
Spending so much time
with one person. Can you imagine?
362
00:15:39,880 --> 00:15:42,838
-[man coughing and wheezing]
-[Audrey] Hmm…
363
00:15:42,921 --> 00:15:45,130
[coughing]
364
00:15:45,213 --> 00:15:48,880
Well, speaking of my one person,
365
00:15:49,546 --> 00:15:50,588
there he is.
366
00:15:50,671 --> 00:15:53,130
Nick, this is Saira.
367
00:15:53,213 --> 00:15:54,463
This is Vik's sister.
368
00:15:55,046 --> 00:15:56,130
-Would you…
-[Saira] No.
369
00:15:56,213 --> 00:15:57,463
-You good?
-[Audrey] She's good.
370
00:15:57,546 --> 00:15:59,338
-I am Nick. Nice to meet you.
-Saira.
371
00:15:59,421 --> 00:16:00,671
Love your brother, by the way.
372
00:16:00,755 --> 00:16:02,380
-He's hysterical.
-[Saira] Right.
373
00:16:02,463 --> 00:16:03,505
Oh boy.
374
00:16:05,588 --> 00:16:08,421
Okay, if you're trying to seduce me,
it's really not working.
375
00:16:08,505 --> 00:16:09,463
Oh my God.
376
00:16:09,546 --> 00:16:13,338
Hey, Nick. I was just thinking
about your lovely wife.
377
00:16:13,421 --> 00:16:14,588
Oh, you again.
378
00:16:14,671 --> 00:16:16,296
I see you've already met Francisco.
379
00:16:16,380 --> 00:16:19,463
And I guess you're both acquainted
with Vikram's harpy of a sister.
380
00:16:19,546 --> 00:16:21,713
-Did he say "herpe"?
-Harpy.
381
00:16:21,796 --> 00:16:25,546
Countess! How humiliating it must be
for you to see Claudette
382
00:16:25,630 --> 00:16:27,963
actually close a deal with the Maharajah.
383
00:16:28,046 --> 00:16:30,671
Ever wonder what
you might have done wrong, dear?
384
00:16:30,755 --> 00:16:34,755
Ever wonder what it feels like
to be tall enough to ride a rollercoaster?
385
00:16:34,838 --> 00:16:38,088
[woman snickering]
386
00:16:38,171 --> 00:16:39,880
That's Countess Sekou.
387
00:16:39,963 --> 00:16:41,630
She's Vik's ex-fiancée,
388
00:16:41,713 --> 00:16:44,213
and she's
Claudette's old university roommate.
389
00:16:44,296 --> 00:16:47,463
And they're still friends?
She's quite rude, by the way.
390
00:16:47,546 --> 00:16:50,713
Well, on top of all that,
she's also Claudette's maid of honor.
391
00:16:50,796 --> 00:16:51,630
-[Audrey] What?
-Yeah.
392
00:16:51,713 --> 00:16:55,588
[man over PA] Hope you watched the video
because the dancing is about to begin!
393
00:16:55,671 --> 00:16:58,046
-What dancing?
-I'm gonna fake going to the bathroom.
394
00:16:58,130 --> 00:17:00,380
-I don't dance. You dance.
-I didn't get a video. Did you?
395
00:17:00,463 --> 00:17:01,838
They brought one to the room.
396
00:17:01,921 --> 00:17:03,296
-I forgot to tell you.
-Thanks.
397
00:17:03,380 --> 00:17:05,630
[rhythmical drumming]
398
00:17:08,546 --> 00:17:10,296
["King Dee Wedding" begins to play]
399
00:17:11,796 --> 00:17:13,380
[singing in Hindi]
400
00:17:29,588 --> 00:17:34,130
[man over PA] Ladies and gentlemen,
please help me welcome the bride!
401
00:17:34,213 --> 00:17:36,546
[cheering]
402
00:17:52,130 --> 00:17:54,005
[laughing] You get 'em!
403
00:18:00,921 --> 00:18:02,338
[all exclaiming]
404
00:18:02,963 --> 00:18:04,088
[all exclaiming]
405
00:18:06,421 --> 00:18:07,588
Come with us!
406
00:18:22,588 --> 00:18:23,463
All right, come on!
407
00:18:30,338 --> 00:18:31,755
-Come on, baby!
-[screams]
408
00:18:39,171 --> 00:18:41,421
[over PA] And now it's time!
409
00:18:41,505 --> 00:18:44,213
The moment you've all been waiting for.
410
00:18:44,296 --> 00:18:47,796
The groom, Vikram Govindan!
411
00:18:47,880 --> 00:18:48,880
[elephant trumpets]
412
00:18:48,963 --> 00:18:50,380
This is crazy!
413
00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:52,296
[music continues]
414
00:19:05,213 --> 00:19:06,421
[all gasp]
415
00:19:06,505 --> 00:19:07,505
[screaming]
416
00:19:07,588 --> 00:19:09,213
[clamoring]
417
00:19:09,296 --> 00:19:10,171
Brother!
418
00:19:10,255 --> 00:19:12,838
Back! Get everybody back!
Get everybody back!
419
00:19:12,921 --> 00:19:13,838
[guard] Stay back!
420
00:19:13,921 --> 00:19:14,755
Vik!
421
00:19:14,838 --> 00:19:16,671
-[Nick] Okay, all right.
-[Claudette shrieks]
422
00:19:17,671 --> 00:19:18,963
[Claudette] Is he dead?
423
00:19:19,046 --> 00:19:20,463
[onlookers gasping]
424
00:19:20,546 --> 00:19:22,088
It's not him. It's not Vik.
425
00:19:22,171 --> 00:19:23,838
Oh, thank God! It's only Mr. Lou.
426
00:19:25,005 --> 00:19:28,088
-Who did this to you?
-[Claudette] Where is Vik? Hey!
427
00:19:28,171 --> 00:19:30,255
[Audrey] Who? What? Oh my gosh!
428
00:19:30,338 --> 00:19:31,505
Where is Vik?
429
00:19:31,588 --> 00:19:33,880
-Who did this to you?
-Who was it? Do you remember?
430
00:19:33,963 --> 00:19:34,796
It was…
431
00:19:34,880 --> 00:19:37,421
[Nick] Say it. Say it.
Don't die. Don't die!
432
00:19:37,505 --> 00:19:39,546
-[Audrey] Oh my gosh!
-[Claudette] Where is Vik?
433
00:19:39,630 --> 00:19:41,005
[guard 1] Clear! Clear! Come on!
434
00:19:41,088 --> 00:19:44,380
-Come on! Come on! Come on! Go!
-[guard 2] Clear!
435
00:19:44,463 --> 00:19:46,421
-[Nick] This is a distraction.
-[Audrey] From what?
436
00:19:47,088 --> 00:19:47,921
From the escape!
437
00:19:48,005 --> 00:19:50,005
[dramatic music playing]
438
00:20:03,088 --> 00:20:05,005
-[Colonel] Are you serious?
-[shutter clicks]
439
00:20:05,088 --> 00:20:07,088
What do you mean
all communication systems are down?
440
00:20:07,171 --> 00:20:08,880
Get them up and running!
441
00:20:08,963 --> 00:20:12,671
We have a security officer compromised.
We need medical attention immediately.
442
00:20:12,755 --> 00:20:13,713
[sighs] Okay.
443
00:20:14,463 --> 00:20:15,505
[Vik] Help!
444
00:20:15,588 --> 00:20:18,130
Yo, you hatin’ hard on me right now, son!
445
00:20:18,213 --> 00:20:20,171
-Homeboy!
-[Vik] Nick!
446
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:25,296
[boat engine revs]
447
00:20:25,380 --> 00:20:27,255
[Vik yelling] Nick!
448
00:20:27,338 --> 00:20:29,796
This is some janky-ass shit!
449
00:20:31,255 --> 00:20:33,005
[Colonel] Lock down the island
450
00:20:33,088 --> 00:20:35,671
until the security cameras
are back online.
451
00:20:36,171 --> 00:20:38,255
All guests are to remain in their rooms.
452
00:20:38,338 --> 00:20:41,921
Oh my God. We need to get ahead of this,
or our shares will plummet.
453
00:20:42,005 --> 00:20:43,171
My brother could be dead
454
00:20:43,255 --> 00:20:45,671
and the only thing you're concerned about
are share prices?
455
00:20:45,755 --> 00:20:47,796
Oh! [laughs]
456
00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:51,088
How do you think our investors will react
when news of this gets out,
457
00:20:51,171 --> 00:20:53,713
you little Miss Minority Shareholder?
458
00:20:53,796 --> 00:20:56,713
Giving all her money
to save the whales and heal the planet
459
00:20:56,796 --> 00:20:58,130
and all that nonsense.
460
00:20:58,838 --> 00:21:01,130
Colonel. Where is Vik?
461
00:21:01,963 --> 00:21:03,213
Where is my husband?
462
00:21:03,296 --> 00:21:05,713
[Colonel] We will find him.
We will find him.
463
00:21:05,796 --> 00:21:07,588
[panting]
464
00:21:07,671 --> 00:21:09,421
The Maharajah's been kidnapped.
465
00:21:09,505 --> 00:21:10,838
-What?
-[Countess] Oh my God!
466
00:21:10,921 --> 00:21:12,796
-Where did they take him?
-[Nick] He's alive.
467
00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:16,130
Somebody with a machine gun
threw him on a boat, and they took off.
468
00:21:16,213 --> 00:21:17,546
-How many kidnappers?
-[Nick] One.
469
00:21:17,630 --> 00:21:20,005
Which means his partner
is still here on the island.
470
00:21:20,088 --> 00:21:22,463
Hold on. How do you know there were two?
471
00:21:22,546 --> 00:21:25,588
If the kidnapper had Vik
and was taking him to the boat…
472
00:21:25,671 --> 00:21:28,463
Ah, someone else
was leading the elephant into the tent.
473
00:21:28,546 --> 00:21:31,171
-Thank you.
-There are 400 people on this island.
474
00:21:31,255 --> 00:21:32,421
That's a lot of suspects.
475
00:21:32,505 --> 00:21:34,671
Let us narrow it down for you,
okay, Colonel?
476
00:21:34,755 --> 00:21:38,255
Claudette, how many people knew about
the elephant being part of the ceremony?
477
00:21:38,338 --> 00:21:39,171
Just the board.
478
00:21:39,255 --> 00:21:42,380
Yeah, we had to sign off at the expense
of transporting an elephant.
479
00:21:42,463 --> 00:21:44,380
So that means all of you.
480
00:21:44,463 --> 00:21:45,963
What are you implying?
481
00:21:46,046 --> 00:21:48,921
I think it's very obvious
what I'm implying.
482
00:21:49,005 --> 00:21:51,546
-[Nick] Mm-hmm.
-One of you is an accomplice to a murder.
483
00:21:52,046 --> 00:21:54,505
[mysterious music playing]
484
00:21:54,588 --> 00:21:56,213
-That is ridiculous!
-I'm not on the board!
485
00:21:56,296 --> 00:21:59,005
Is it? You all hated my brother!
486
00:21:59,088 --> 00:22:01,213
What? No, I… I love Vik.
487
00:22:01,296 --> 00:22:03,046
[scoffs] Oh, please!
488
00:22:03,130 --> 00:22:05,546
-You've never forgiven me.
-For what?
489
00:22:05,630 --> 00:22:08,255
-Breaking up your engagement.
-Oh, get over yourself.
490
00:22:08,338 --> 00:22:11,713
It was an arranged marriage
between our families.
491
00:22:11,796 --> 00:22:16,046
We amicably split in order to allow
for your so-called "love marriage."
492
00:22:16,130 --> 00:22:18,796
You didn't want this marriage
to go through so you kidnapped him!
493
00:22:18,880 --> 00:22:20,088
You gold-digging--
494
00:22:20,171 --> 00:22:24,338
-Ladies, stop it!
-Calm down, everybody!
495
00:22:24,421 --> 00:22:27,046
-We do this for a living. It's what we do.
-[Nick] It's our thing.
496
00:22:27,130 --> 00:22:28,880
-And this is not just another case.
-No.
497
00:22:28,963 --> 00:22:31,005
-[Nick] This is personal.
-[Audrey] Yeah, it's Vik.
498
00:22:31,088 --> 00:22:34,213
-[Nick] He means a lot to us.
-[Audrey] So we'll find out who did this.
499
00:22:34,296 --> 00:22:37,463
-[Nick] A hundred percent.
-[Audrey] And find out why they did this.
500
00:22:37,546 --> 00:22:39,046
And we're gonna get Vik back, okay?
501
00:22:39,130 --> 00:22:42,630
We're gonna do this
for the low, low price of $25 million.
502
00:22:42,713 --> 00:22:44,796
[silence]
503
00:22:46,046 --> 00:22:48,463
Twenty-five mil, honey. I swear to God.
504
00:22:48,546 --> 00:22:50,171
[Nick] I would've settled for ten grand.
505
00:22:50,255 --> 00:22:51,671
So insane.
506
00:22:53,255 --> 00:22:54,296
[Nick grunts]
507
00:22:54,380 --> 00:22:56,130
What are you doing?
508
00:22:56,213 --> 00:22:58,463
[Nick] I'm blocking the door
so no one can get in.
509
00:22:58,546 --> 00:23:00,255
[Audrey]
Honey, you're gonna hurt your back.
510
00:23:00,338 --> 00:23:03,171
You know what would hurt my back?
A knife going through it.
511
00:23:03,255 --> 00:23:04,671
The killer knows we're on to him.
512
00:23:04,755 --> 00:23:06,755
We're on the next-to-kill list.
I guarantee it.
513
00:23:06,838 --> 00:23:07,713
What happened to Vik?
514
00:23:07,796 --> 00:23:10,171
A guy that rich
gets kidnapped for the money.
515
00:23:10,255 --> 00:23:11,796
There's no profit in hurting him.
516
00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:15,088
Oh God. We're not gonna be invited
anywhere ever again. Ever again.
517
00:23:15,171 --> 00:23:17,505
The cheese has a hold on me, honey.
I can't stop.
518
00:23:17,588 --> 00:23:20,713
Are you just… Will you take a slice
like a civilized person?
519
00:23:20,796 --> 00:23:22,171
I don't know where the knife is.
520
00:23:22,255 --> 00:23:24,671
-Oh Jesus!
-[Nick] What? You got a headache?
521
00:23:24,755 --> 00:23:26,005
-Yes!
-[Nick] I'm sorry.
522
00:23:26,088 --> 00:23:27,880
-How's your back?
-My back's killing me.
523
00:23:27,963 --> 00:23:29,338
-I'll get Advil.
-Please. Please.
524
00:23:29,421 --> 00:23:32,713
-I'm gonna get more cheese in me.
-Honey, do not eat all that cheese.
525
00:23:32,796 --> 00:23:34,796
That affects… You're terrible all night.
526
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:36,213
-Absolutely.
-Oh.
527
00:23:36,296 --> 00:23:39,838
And I have pictures from the tent
of a burned robe with bloodstains.
528
00:23:39,921 --> 00:23:41,671
Someone was trying
to get rid of the evidence,
529
00:23:41,755 --> 00:23:43,880
and I'm sure it was the elephant handler.
530
00:23:43,963 --> 00:23:45,213
Good detecting, sweetheart.
531
00:23:45,296 --> 00:23:47,213
-I'm doing my best. Here.
-[Nick] Okay. Thank you.
532
00:23:47,296 --> 00:23:49,255
-[Audrey] One, two, three, four.
-[Nick] Okay.
533
00:23:50,171 --> 00:23:52,505
-[frantic knocking on door]
-[dramatic music playing]
534
00:23:52,588 --> 00:23:54,046
[Nick] I gotta move this stuff now?
535
00:23:54,130 --> 00:23:55,338
What if that's the killer?
536
00:23:55,421 --> 00:23:57,671
-Killers don't knock.
-What if it's housekeeping?
537
00:23:57,755 --> 00:24:00,380
We… We're good! We don't need any towels.
538
00:24:00,463 --> 00:24:03,213
No! No! We do need towels.
Leave 'em out front, please!
539
00:24:03,296 --> 00:24:05,338
We've been here ten minutes.
You need more towels?
540
00:24:05,421 --> 00:24:07,171
You use 30 towels after every shower.
541
00:24:07,255 --> 00:24:08,671
I'm sorry. At least I shower.
542
00:24:08,755 --> 00:24:10,046
All right, you got me there.
543
00:24:10,130 --> 00:24:11,963
[Francisco] It's me, Francisco!
544
00:24:12,046 --> 00:24:12,963
Francisco?
545
00:24:13,046 --> 00:24:15,088
Wait, wait, wait. What if he's the killer?
546
00:24:15,171 --> 00:24:17,588
The only thing
he wants to murder is your hm-hm!
547
00:24:17,671 --> 00:24:18,505
Hey!
548
00:24:18,588 --> 00:24:20,880
-[Francisco] Hurry! There's no time!
-[Nick] Be right there!
549
00:24:20,963 --> 00:24:22,671
-[Audrey] We're hurrying!
-[Nick] We know!
550
00:24:25,296 --> 00:24:26,213
So sorry.
551
00:24:26,296 --> 00:24:27,463
-[Nick] Hey.
-Hey.
552
00:24:29,296 --> 00:24:30,755
-You.
-[Nick] Mm-hmm.
553
00:24:31,380 --> 00:24:32,380
Gorgeous.
554
00:24:33,755 --> 00:24:35,421
[Nick] Jesus Christ. All right.
555
00:24:36,171 --> 00:24:37,713
[Audrey] Put this back. You said hurry.
556
00:24:37,796 --> 00:24:39,755
What's… How can we help?
557
00:24:39,838 --> 00:24:41,505
-I have information.
-[Nick] Yes.
558
00:24:41,588 --> 00:24:43,796
Everyone thinks Claudette
is this gold digger,
559
00:24:43,880 --> 00:24:47,505
but what's not so well known
is the fact that, as a precaution,
560
00:24:47,588 --> 00:24:50,630
the board made her sign a brutal prenup.
561
00:24:50,713 --> 00:24:55,255
So that means if Vik divorces her,
she's left with nothin'.
562
00:24:56,255 --> 00:24:58,296
[dramatic music swells]
563
00:24:58,380 --> 00:25:01,380
-I gotta move this shit again?
-Wait. Wait. Who is it?
564
00:25:01,463 --> 00:25:03,880
[Claudette] It's Claudette.
You must hear what I have to say.
565
00:25:03,963 --> 00:25:05,463
Okay, one second.
566
00:25:05,546 --> 00:25:06,880
Let's get you in the closet.
567
00:25:06,963 --> 00:25:09,255
[Nick] Okay, be right there.
I gotta get some cheese.
568
00:25:09,338 --> 00:25:11,463
-Okay. Just go in there.
-[rock scraping floor]
569
00:25:11,546 --> 00:25:13,713
No! Get off of… Jesus!
570
00:25:13,796 --> 00:25:15,546
-Coming, Claudette!
-Sorry! One second.
571
00:25:15,630 --> 00:25:17,213
[breathing heavily]
572
00:25:17,296 --> 00:25:18,130
[Nick] Hurry!
573
00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:20,713
-[Audrey] Hello, Claudette.
-[Nick] Hi.
574
00:25:20,796 --> 00:25:22,088
[Claudette sighs]
575
00:25:23,171 --> 00:25:24,963
[Claudette]
They all think I'm marrying Vik
576
00:25:25,046 --> 00:25:26,921
just for the money,
especially the Countess.
577
00:25:27,880 --> 00:25:29,796
She's been jealous of me
ever since we met.
578
00:25:29,880 --> 00:25:31,921
-Really? I can imagine why.
-I can imagine.
579
00:25:32,005 --> 00:25:34,338
But still, she was my best friend.
580
00:25:34,421 --> 00:25:35,421
-Right.
-[Nick] Sure.
581
00:25:35,505 --> 00:25:36,713
-You know?
-Yeah.
582
00:25:36,796 --> 00:25:38,671
-We were so close.
-[Audrey] Oh!
583
00:25:38,755 --> 00:25:40,838
And I think I just miss her sometimes.
584
00:25:41,421 --> 00:25:44,546
-Oh, sorry.
-[Claudette sobbing]
585
00:25:44,630 --> 00:25:47,463
-I just wanna know who kidnapped my Vik.
-Mm-hmm.
586
00:25:47,546 --> 00:25:49,713
They all have something to gain from this.
587
00:25:49,796 --> 00:25:50,838
Pfft!
588
00:25:50,921 --> 00:25:51,755
Pfft!
589
00:25:51,838 --> 00:25:52,880
Pfft!
590
00:25:52,963 --> 00:25:55,213
-Terrible.
-[Claudette] I can't trust any of them!
591
00:25:55,296 --> 00:25:56,796
-[whispers] There's a gun.
-A gun?
592
00:25:56,880 --> 00:25:59,046
[Claudette] The Colonel,
so bitter about his demotion.
593
00:25:59,130 --> 00:26:01,380
Saira, always starved for attention.
594
00:26:02,046 --> 00:26:04,505
And Vik had just discovered
595
00:26:04,588 --> 00:26:06,171
Francisco's dark secret.
596
00:26:06,255 --> 00:26:08,005
-[Audrey] What?
-[Nick] He had a secret?
597
00:26:08,088 --> 00:26:09,463
-Oh!
-[Nick] Oh God.
598
00:26:09,546 --> 00:26:10,755
-[cocks gun]
-[Audrey gasps]
599
00:26:10,838 --> 00:26:13,213
-[Audrey] We don't need to do that.
-[Nick] That's cool.
600
00:26:13,296 --> 00:26:14,213
Who is it?
601
00:26:14,296 --> 00:26:15,588
It's Saira. Let me in.
602
00:26:15,671 --> 00:26:16,671
Uh, okay. One second.
603
00:26:16,755 --> 00:26:18,505
-I need to hide. The closet!
-No, no, no!
604
00:26:18,588 --> 00:26:20,380
-[Nick] It's too dark.
-Here. Come on.
605
00:26:20,463 --> 00:26:22,505
-[Nick] She has all her stuff.
-One second, Saira!
606
00:26:22,588 --> 00:26:23,838
[Nick] Coming! Be right there!
607
00:26:23,921 --> 00:26:26,046
[Nick straining]
608
00:26:26,130 --> 00:26:27,880
Okay, gotta get to you!
609
00:26:27,963 --> 00:26:30,671
-So sorry. One second.
-Moving around some stuff for fun!
610
00:26:31,880 --> 00:26:34,130
-I know who you need to be looking at.
-[Nick] Who?
611
00:26:34,213 --> 00:26:35,713
-Claudette!
-[Nick] Claudette?
612
00:26:35,796 --> 00:26:38,338
[Saira] I told Vik she was bad news
the minute I met her.
613
00:26:38,421 --> 00:26:40,255
She's suspicious,
narcissistic, manipulative,
614
00:26:40,338 --> 00:26:42,463
and looks cheap as well
in that red dress--
615
00:26:42,546 --> 00:26:45,921
Excuse me! I'm so sorry to interrupt,
but I feel like I'd be a rude hostess
616
00:26:46,005 --> 00:26:49,255
if I didn't offer you a piece of this
exquisite artisan cheese that's…
617
00:26:49,338 --> 00:26:51,880
Nick, where's this…
Where's that cheese? The big--
618
00:26:51,963 --> 00:26:53,338
-The cheese is gone.
-Where is it?
619
00:26:53,421 --> 00:26:54,546
I put it, uh, in my stomach.
620
00:26:54,630 --> 00:26:56,296
You ate that entire block of cheese?
621
00:26:56,380 --> 00:26:59,796
Trying to shame me. I don't know
if that's gonna get the cheese back--
622
00:26:59,880 --> 00:27:01,921
I'm sorry. I don't mean to be selfish--
623
00:27:02,005 --> 00:27:03,380
Sorry. Hold on. You know what?
624
00:27:03,463 --> 00:27:07,296
Let me give you a drink right now
just to relax you a little bit.
625
00:27:07,380 --> 00:27:08,546
-Here.
-I… I don't want that.
626
00:27:08,630 --> 00:27:10,505
-No? Okay.
-I'm okay.
627
00:27:10,588 --> 00:27:11,671
[frantic knocking]
628
00:27:11,755 --> 00:27:13,880
-Oh shit.
-[Saira] Who is it?
629
00:27:13,963 --> 00:27:15,671
-[Audrey] Not sure.
-You expecting someone?
630
00:27:15,755 --> 00:27:18,005
It's like an after-party.
People just show up.
631
00:27:18,088 --> 00:27:21,088
Let's put you into the bedroom,
just in case, 'cause I don't know.
632
00:27:21,171 --> 00:27:23,338
-I'll hide there.
-Don't hide in there! Why?
633
00:27:23,421 --> 00:27:24,338
That's an obvious spot.
634
00:27:24,421 --> 00:27:26,630
-[Audrey] Is it hot in here?
-I'm hot too.
635
00:27:26,713 --> 00:27:28,171
-I'm coming!
-[knocking continues]
636
00:27:28,255 --> 00:27:29,505
What if that is the killer?
637
00:27:29,588 --> 00:27:32,588
Don't you kinda want it
to be the killer so they can kill us?
638
00:27:32,671 --> 00:27:33,921
I am sick of this shit.
639
00:27:34,005 --> 00:27:35,921
-Baby, I do not feel very good.
-[rock scraping]
640
00:27:36,005 --> 00:27:37,255
[lock clicking]
641
00:27:37,338 --> 00:27:39,588
What's doin'? Yeah?
642
00:27:40,380 --> 00:27:42,088
Hey, great to see you.
643
00:27:42,171 --> 00:27:44,005
What's going on? [chuckles lightly]
644
00:27:46,171 --> 00:27:47,171
[door closes]
645
00:27:47,255 --> 00:27:48,505
[Countess] I know who did it.
646
00:27:48,588 --> 00:27:49,671
Who?
647
00:27:51,921 --> 00:27:53,255
It was Francisco.
648
00:27:53,338 --> 00:27:54,671
Francisco!
649
00:27:54,755 --> 00:27:58,005
He has had over 85 paternity suits
filed against him.
650
00:27:58,088 --> 00:28:00,255
We suspect he's been siphoning money
out of the company
651
00:28:00,338 --> 00:28:02,880
in order to pay
for all of these babies he made.
652
00:28:02,963 --> 00:28:04,713
That's a lie!
653
00:28:04,796 --> 00:28:06,130
Not the part about the babies.
654
00:28:06,213 --> 00:28:09,088
Yes, that's true.
I've spread my seed far and wide,
655
00:28:09,171 --> 00:28:11,921
but I have never stolen in my life.
656
00:28:12,005 --> 00:28:14,421
-What are you doing here?
-An excellent question.
657
00:28:14,505 --> 00:28:17,088
-What are you all doing here?
-Saira's here.
658
00:28:18,130 --> 00:28:20,338
-Nobody move!
-Oh my God!
659
00:28:20,421 --> 00:28:21,380
I ain't moving.
660
00:28:21,463 --> 00:28:22,921
[cell phone ringing]
661
00:28:23,880 --> 00:28:24,796
It's mine. It's mine.
662
00:28:26,296 --> 00:28:27,755
-I missed it.
-[Nick] Missed the call?
663
00:28:28,380 --> 00:28:29,213
[phone beeping]
664
00:28:29,921 --> 00:28:30,921
I have a message.
665
00:28:34,213 --> 00:28:35,921
[distorted voice] We have the Maharajah.
666
00:28:36,421 --> 00:28:39,255
If you contact the authorities, he dies.
667
00:28:39,338 --> 00:28:41,546
We'll make our demands
known to you at 7:00 a.m.
668
00:28:41,630 --> 00:28:42,588
[call disconnects]
669
00:28:42,671 --> 00:28:45,463
That voice is hysterical.
You got to admit it.
670
00:28:45,546 --> 00:28:47,630
So we should all stay here.
Correct, Colonel?
671
00:28:47,713 --> 00:28:51,171
Because one of us is definitely
working with the kidnapper.
672
00:28:51,255 --> 00:28:55,046
Yeah. Motives, opportunities.
673
00:28:55,130 --> 00:28:56,380
Somebody here.
674
00:28:56,463 --> 00:28:58,546
My head is spinning a little bit.
675
00:28:58,630 --> 00:28:59,963
Honey?
676
00:29:00,755 --> 00:29:04,588
Babe, are you taking a nap?
I'm tired, too, so let's, uh…
677
00:29:05,421 --> 00:29:07,796
Nobody leave here
until we figure out who did what.
678
00:29:07,880 --> 00:29:09,296
It's great to see everybody.
679
00:29:09,380 --> 00:29:11,755
-Thanks for coming over. Sorry, my bad.
-[Francisco] Whoa!
680
00:29:15,380 --> 00:29:17,296
[inhales deeply]
681
00:29:17,380 --> 00:29:20,213
[sighing] Hmm!
682
00:29:24,505 --> 00:29:26,838
[Audrey groaning]
683
00:29:27,380 --> 00:29:29,546
[yelps] Jesus! What?
684
00:29:31,255 --> 00:29:32,546
Oh my God. Nick?
685
00:29:32,630 --> 00:29:34,005
-[Nick] Yeah.
-Nick?
686
00:29:34,088 --> 00:29:35,005
[Nick] Yeah?
687
00:29:35,088 --> 00:29:36,796
-[Audrey] Nick!
-Uh-huh.
688
00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:39,546
Nicky, honey.
Get up. Get up! We got roofied.
689
00:29:39,630 --> 00:29:42,463
-What happened?
-[Audrey] Baby. Oh my God! We fell asleep!
690
00:29:42,546 --> 00:29:43,755
-[Nick] Oh yeah?
-Honey!
691
00:29:43,838 --> 00:29:44,838
[Nick] We're sleeping now.
692
00:29:44,921 --> 00:29:47,380
I don't know what happened. Uh, I…
693
00:29:47,463 --> 00:29:49,630
-Come on! Get up, Nick!
-[Nick] Okay. Up. I'm up.
694
00:29:49,713 --> 00:29:50,713
[Audrey] Who did this?
695
00:29:50,796 --> 00:29:52,963
[Nick] What? Now they're just showing off.
696
00:29:53,463 --> 00:29:56,380
-[Audrey] Hurry up!
-[Nick] Okay, I'm coming, honey. So…
697
00:29:56,463 --> 00:29:58,130
-[Audrey] Get up!
-[Nick] I'm up!
698
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:02,005
-Calm down before you say anything.
-Nobody drugs us and gets away with it!
699
00:30:02,088 --> 00:30:03,671
-Maybe they didn't drug us.
-It's illegal!
700
00:30:03,755 --> 00:30:04,963
Maybe we just ate too much.
701
00:30:05,046 --> 00:30:08,088
-That's why we passed out.
-Nick. Audrey. Just in time.
702
00:30:08,671 --> 00:30:09,921
-For what?
-For what?
703
00:30:10,005 --> 00:30:12,005
The real detectives have just arrived.
704
00:30:12,088 --> 00:30:14,171
[intense music playing]
705
00:30:18,130 --> 00:30:19,296
[Colonel] Connor Miller.
706
00:30:19,380 --> 00:30:22,630
-[Audrey gasps]
-Former MI6 hostage negotiator.
707
00:30:22,713 --> 00:30:25,755
Oh my God.
Specializes in high-profile cases.
708
00:30:25,838 --> 00:30:28,255
He got the President of Uruguay's son
back from the cartel.
709
00:30:28,338 --> 00:30:30,213
-He wrote the book. He wrote the book.
-On what?
710
00:30:30,296 --> 00:30:32,421
How Rogaine doesn't work for everybody?
711
00:30:32,505 --> 00:30:34,421
The book! Our course detective book!
712
00:30:36,421 --> 00:30:38,921
[Miller] Greetings.
I hear you need a case solved.
713
00:30:40,213 --> 00:30:42,338
Colonel. Been a long time.
714
00:30:42,921 --> 00:30:44,338
Francisco Perez.
715
00:30:44,421 --> 00:30:45,588
Huh?
716
00:30:45,671 --> 00:30:46,755
Big fan.
717
00:30:46,838 --> 00:30:47,921
-Oh.
-Hey.
718
00:30:48,005 --> 00:30:51,296
Mr. Miller, we're also very big fans.
Um, we can bring you up to speed.
719
00:30:51,380 --> 00:30:54,671
So what we know already is that
this is at least a two-person job.
720
00:30:54,755 --> 00:30:58,380
I saw the first guy
escape with Vik on a boat,
721
00:30:58,463 --> 00:31:00,380
leaving the second guy
still on the island.
722
00:31:00,463 --> 00:31:03,171
Also, just so you know,
we were both drugged last night.
723
00:31:03,255 --> 00:31:05,671
I don't know if we were drugged.
We did have a few drinks--
724
00:31:05,755 --> 00:31:07,255
-You must be the Spitzes.
-Yes.
725
00:31:07,338 --> 00:31:08,838
Yes, we are!
726
00:31:08,921 --> 00:31:10,671
Your reputations precede you.
727
00:31:10,755 --> 00:31:11,963
-There you go.
-Why, thank you.
728
00:31:12,046 --> 00:31:14,880
-That's nice to hear.
-Uh, not in a positive way, I'm afraid.
729
00:31:14,963 --> 00:31:16,005
Okay.
730
00:31:16,088 --> 00:31:19,130
I understand the last time
you were involved in something like this,
731
00:31:19,213 --> 00:31:20,338
everybody died?
732
00:31:20,421 --> 00:31:22,630
Well, that was not the Maharajah.
733
00:31:22,713 --> 00:31:24,130
How's he doing now?
734
00:31:24,213 --> 00:31:25,380
-[laughs] Okay.
-Right.
735
00:31:25,463 --> 00:31:28,046
The Colonel's still here,
most of him, so there. That's good.
736
00:31:28,130 --> 00:31:30,713
Um, listen.
Mr. Miller, I read your book, and--
737
00:31:30,796 --> 00:31:33,005
[Miller] Colonel, I wanna see
all the security footage.
738
00:31:33,088 --> 00:31:35,213
All the footage
was wiped from the mainframe.
739
00:31:35,296 --> 00:31:36,796
Yeah, 'cause it's an inside job.
740
00:31:36,880 --> 00:31:37,838
Mademoiselle Joubert,
741
00:31:37,921 --> 00:31:40,338
we'll need your phone
for a vocal analysis of the voice mail.
742
00:31:40,421 --> 00:31:41,546
Of course. Anything you need.
743
00:31:41,630 --> 00:31:45,130
They're professional, no doubt.
They were concise and brief on the phone.
744
00:31:45,213 --> 00:31:46,380
We also have reason to believe
745
00:31:46,463 --> 00:31:49,255
that the inside man
was posing as an elephant handler.
746
00:31:50,463 --> 00:31:52,713
You really wanna do
suspects now, Mrs. Spitz?
747
00:31:52,796 --> 00:31:54,005
-Sure.
-[Miller] Fine.
748
00:31:54,088 --> 00:31:55,921
How about this? Uh…
749
00:31:56,005 --> 00:31:58,713
A husband and wife,
one an NYPD almost-detective,
750
00:31:58,796 --> 00:32:01,380
the other a hairdresser
taking online classes.
751
00:32:01,463 --> 00:32:03,880
Together they run
a private detective agency
752
00:32:03,963 --> 00:32:05,630
teetering on the edge of bankruptcy.
753
00:32:05,713 --> 00:32:07,088
And if I were to hazard a guess,
754
00:32:07,171 --> 00:32:09,380
I'd say it's probably
taking a toll on their marriage.
755
00:32:09,963 --> 00:32:12,255
Desperate to give validity
to their failing business,
756
00:32:12,338 --> 00:32:16,130
they accept a last-minute invite
from a billionaire to attend his wedding.
757
00:32:16,213 --> 00:32:17,630
And so a plan is born.
758
00:32:17,713 --> 00:32:21,130
Twenty-four hours after their arrival,
there's a high-profile kidnapping,
759
00:32:21,213 --> 00:32:22,713
the sort that gets attention.
760
00:32:22,796 --> 00:32:24,213
A career maker.
761
00:32:25,005 --> 00:32:28,588
How's my reasoning, fellow… detectives?
762
00:32:28,671 --> 00:32:30,838
-Pretty excellent. None of it was true.
-Gorgeous.
763
00:32:30,921 --> 00:32:33,421
I was starting to go with it
'cause of the way you phrase things.
764
00:32:33,505 --> 00:32:35,171
-I almost believed him.
-The accent helps.
765
00:32:35,755 --> 00:32:38,463
Call trace is ready. Kidnappers should be
calling in any minute.
766
00:32:38,546 --> 00:32:40,213
If you'll excuse me, I have a job to do.
767
00:32:40,296 --> 00:32:41,838
-Okay, so listen.
-[Audrey] Yes, honey.
768
00:32:41,921 --> 00:32:45,171
We got good cheese. We got free iPhones.
I'm happy with everything.
769
00:32:45,255 --> 00:32:48,338
Where are you going? Did you hear
what that guy just said about us?
770
00:32:48,421 --> 00:32:50,046
-[Nick] Yeah.
-None of that's true!
771
00:32:50,130 --> 00:32:53,255
We need to show those people
what Nick and Audrey Spitz are all about.
772
00:32:53,338 --> 00:32:55,338
The guy's good! I don't think he needs us.
773
00:32:55,421 --> 00:32:56,838
-Nick. Audrey.
-[both] What?
774
00:32:56,921 --> 00:32:59,796
The kidnapper says
he'll only talk to the man he shot at.
775
00:32:59,880 --> 00:33:01,671
They need us. All right. They need us.
776
00:33:01,755 --> 00:33:02,671
-Let's go!
-Let's go!
777
00:33:02,755 --> 00:33:04,046
[dramatic music playing]
778
00:33:05,255 --> 00:33:07,130
-[machines beeping]
-[Colonel] They're here.
779
00:33:09,130 --> 00:33:11,046
-[Miller] He's calling back in a minute.
-Okay.
780
00:33:11,130 --> 00:33:13,213
You need to keep him calm,
keep him talking.
781
00:33:13,296 --> 00:33:14,838
-We need at least--
-Forty-five seconds.
782
00:33:14,921 --> 00:33:18,171
-I know. It's not my first rodeo, pal.
-You've done hostage negotiation?
783
00:33:18,255 --> 00:33:21,296
I'm married to this lady.
Everything's a negotiation. I got it.
784
00:33:21,380 --> 00:33:22,296
Appreciate it.
785
00:33:22,380 --> 00:33:23,338
[cell phone ringing]
786
00:33:23,421 --> 00:33:25,505
[tense music playing]
787
00:33:28,338 --> 00:33:29,255
[Nick sighs]
788
00:33:29,338 --> 00:33:32,713
So 45 seconds, and it starts… now.
789
00:33:33,463 --> 00:33:35,713
Hi. Kidnapper, how are you?
790
00:33:35,796 --> 00:33:38,713
[kidnapper] Is this the man
who tried to stop me on my escape?
791
00:33:38,796 --> 00:33:40,921
Yes, yes, yes, the man you shot at.
792
00:33:41,005 --> 00:33:43,630
Luckily, I got out of the way. [chuckles]
793
00:33:43,713 --> 00:33:46,088
Tell me what we can do
to get Vik back safely.
794
00:33:46,171 --> 00:33:47,713
That's all we really care about.
795
00:33:47,796 --> 00:33:51,213
[kidnapper] For the return
of the Maharajah, we require $50 million.
796
00:33:51,296 --> 00:33:52,130
[splutters]
797
00:33:52,213 --> 00:33:54,005
Fifty putos millones?
798
00:33:54,088 --> 00:33:55,213
-Sh!
-[line clicks]
799
00:33:55,296 --> 00:33:56,838
[alarm beeps]
800
00:33:56,921 --> 00:34:00,088
Francisco, you think this is
The Price Is Right, screaming out numbers?
801
00:34:00,171 --> 00:34:01,963
Way too much money for just one guy.
802
00:34:02,046 --> 00:34:04,046
Great. Just lost the trace. Thanks.
803
00:34:04,130 --> 00:34:07,130
-It's my fault? This guy's yelling shit--
-Why are you yelling at me?
804
00:34:07,213 --> 00:34:09,130
-You were directing at me--
-I yelled at that guy!
805
00:34:09,213 --> 00:34:12,130
The guy's hammered right now,
and I'm catching shit for it!
806
00:34:12,213 --> 00:34:14,380
There's the
"taking-a-toll-on-the-marriage" thing.
807
00:34:14,463 --> 00:34:16,296
Excuse me! At least we are married.
808
00:34:16,380 --> 00:34:19,421
Yeah. Calm down. This is how
we communicate. We're from New York.
809
00:34:19,505 --> 00:34:20,963
Can we remain calm?
810
00:34:21,046 --> 00:34:22,588
-I'm sorry. Of course.
-We're calm.
811
00:34:22,671 --> 00:34:23,963
He wants the money. He's gonna call back.
812
00:34:24,046 --> 00:34:25,171
-[Audrey] Relax.
-[Nick] Yup.
813
00:34:25,255 --> 00:34:27,005
-[phone ringing]
-[Nick] Here we go. Okay.
814
00:34:27,088 --> 00:34:28,421
-[Miller] Here we go.
-Got this!
815
00:34:28,505 --> 00:34:31,046
Forty-five seconds starts again now.
816
00:34:31,130 --> 00:34:33,713
Sorry about that, man.
A lot of anxious people here.
817
00:34:33,796 --> 00:34:35,838
One drunk guy. We all got that friend.
818
00:34:35,921 --> 00:34:37,713
[kidnapper] The price just went up to 60.
819
00:34:37,796 --> 00:34:39,171
[groaning]
820
00:34:39,255 --> 00:34:41,005
They say, "Great. No problem."
821
00:34:41,088 --> 00:34:44,338
[kidnapper] You will bring $60 million
in untraceable bearer bonds
822
00:34:44,421 --> 00:34:47,546
to the Arc de Triomphe in Paris
at 8:00 p.m. tomorrow night
823
00:34:47,630 --> 00:34:50,255
and wait with this phone
for further instructions.
824
00:34:50,338 --> 00:34:52,755
Hello, excuse me.
I'm so sorry to interrupt.
825
00:34:52,838 --> 00:34:58,546
But we are going to need unequivocal
evidence that the hostage is still alive.
826
00:34:58,630 --> 00:35:01,463
[kidnapper] You will receive proof of life
before the exchange.
827
00:35:01,546 --> 00:35:03,046
-Cool.
-Thank you very much.
828
00:35:03,130 --> 00:35:06,713
[kidnapper] Arc de Triomphe, 8:00 p.m.,
or the Maharajah dies.
829
00:35:07,296 --> 00:35:10,880
The voice jumbling thing you got on your…
It's hard to understand you.
830
00:35:10,963 --> 00:35:13,463
-The location, yes.
-Can you do that again? Where is it?
831
00:35:13,546 --> 00:35:16,421
-[kidnapper] Arc de Triomphe.
-[Nick] This is what you sound like…
832
00:35:16,505 --> 00:35:18,213
[Nick imitating distorted voice]
833
00:35:18,296 --> 00:35:20,671
-[Nick] That's what we hear.
-[kidnapper] Arc de Triomphe!
834
00:35:20,755 --> 00:35:22,630
Okay, so Arctic Tree Hump.
835
00:35:23,338 --> 00:35:24,796
Got it. You said that, right?
836
00:35:24,880 --> 00:35:26,880
[kidnapper]
The price just went up to 70 now!
837
00:35:26,963 --> 00:35:27,796
[sobbing]
838
00:35:27,880 --> 00:35:31,213
[kidnapper] Seventy million,
or the Maharajah dies a painful death.
839
00:35:31,296 --> 00:35:32,838
Muhammad Ali dies, you say?
840
00:35:32,921 --> 00:35:34,505
-[kidnapper] Oh my God!
-[disconnects]
841
00:35:34,588 --> 00:35:39,213
You just cost us
20 extra million, you doofus!
842
00:35:39,296 --> 00:35:41,088
I don't want these buffoons involved.
843
00:35:41,171 --> 00:35:43,588
I'm afraid the kidnapper does,
so we're stuck with them.
844
00:35:43,671 --> 00:35:45,588
They did it. Got the trace.
845
00:35:45,671 --> 00:35:47,046
-We did?
-Aha!
846
00:35:47,130 --> 00:35:49,171
-See? Team Buffoon wins again!
-Thank you!
847
00:35:49,255 --> 00:35:52,130
You can go back in the ocean now, Miller.
We got this.
848
00:35:52,213 --> 00:35:55,630
We're going to Paris. Everybody pack.
Be ready to leave in one hour.
849
00:35:55,713 --> 00:35:59,005
♪ Paris, Paris, Paris
Paris, Paris, Paris… ♪
850
00:35:59,088 --> 00:36:01,130
["Mermaids Club"
by The Brave Mermaids playing]
851
00:36:01,838 --> 00:36:02,671
Wow!
852
00:36:05,213 --> 00:36:07,963
[Nick] Let's go and do some sightseeing
after the ransom paying.
853
00:36:08,046 --> 00:36:09,421
-Can we do that?
-[Nick] Of course!
854
00:36:09,505 --> 00:36:11,963
Can we just…
You know what? After we get Vik back,
855
00:36:12,046 --> 00:36:14,838
we could go
and renew our vows at Love Locks Bridge.
856
00:36:16,380 --> 00:36:17,338
It's a date.
857
00:36:17,880 --> 00:36:19,463
I'm gonna need your phones.
858
00:36:19,546 --> 00:36:20,796
-Need our phones?
-Why?
859
00:36:20,880 --> 00:36:23,213
-[Miller] They're compromised.
-Oh, okay.
860
00:36:23,296 --> 00:36:26,421
We'll get 'em back, right?
These are brand-new. We got 'em for free.
861
00:36:26,505 --> 00:36:28,463
In the gift bags. They gave 'em to us--
862
00:36:28,546 --> 00:36:29,421
[booming]
863
00:36:30,005 --> 00:36:32,338
-Can't believe that happened.
-We're not getting them back.
864
00:36:32,421 --> 00:36:34,505
I had a dick pic on mine, but that's gone.
865
00:36:34,588 --> 00:36:36,338
[Miller] Let's not obsess about phones.
866
00:36:36,421 --> 00:36:39,505
The only important phone is
the one the kidnapper will call on. Here.
867
00:36:39,588 --> 00:36:43,213
I set it up so we can hear everything.
I'm gonna need one of you to be armed.
868
00:36:43,296 --> 00:36:45,588
-Mr. Spitz, can you handle a gun?
-[Nick] Yes.
869
00:36:45,671 --> 00:36:47,546
-I told you, I was on the force. What?
-Um…
870
00:36:47,630 --> 00:36:49,713
[hesitates]
I just think maybe I should handle it.
871
00:36:49,796 --> 00:36:51,171
-You should handle it?
-Just--
872
00:36:51,255 --> 00:36:52,505
-Why would that--
-Your aim is--
873
00:36:52,588 --> 00:36:53,963
My aim? My aim is fine.
874
00:36:54,046 --> 00:36:55,963
-Why are you saying this?
-He can't hear--
875
00:36:56,046 --> 00:36:58,880
That's like me saying you wear Spanx
in front of a supermodel.
876
00:36:58,963 --> 00:37:02,380
So, uh, I'll take the gun
'cause I'm very good with a gun.
877
00:37:02,463 --> 00:37:05,546
They used to call me "Nicky Guns"
on the force. That was my nickname.
878
00:37:05,630 --> 00:37:09,671
Gang members used to ask me for advice
on the weekends 'cause I shot so well.
879
00:37:09,755 --> 00:37:11,588
I'd say, "I can't.
I don't wanna help you guys."
880
00:37:11,671 --> 00:37:12,671
You take the gun.
881
00:37:12,755 --> 00:37:15,338
I'll take the gun.
I got the phone, and you got the money.
882
00:37:15,421 --> 00:37:18,463
When they call, I want you to follow
the three rules of ransom drops
883
00:37:18,546 --> 00:37:19,838
from Chapter 12 of my book.
884
00:37:19,921 --> 00:37:21,713
Can you do that? Remember what they are?
885
00:37:21,796 --> 00:37:25,671
Number one.
Um, follow all reasonable instructions.
886
00:37:25,755 --> 00:37:26,963
-Yes.
-[Audrey] Number two.
887
00:37:27,046 --> 00:37:31,046
Do not hand off the ransom
until you see the kidnappee.
888
00:37:31,130 --> 00:37:31,963
[Miller] Exactly.
889
00:37:32,046 --> 00:37:36,088
And number three. Do not go
to a secondary location with them.
890
00:37:36,671 --> 00:37:38,338
Perfect. You'll be fine.
891
00:37:38,421 --> 00:37:39,630
Off you go.
892
00:37:39,713 --> 00:37:41,755
-Okay.
-"Nicky Guns" style. Let's go!
893
00:37:41,838 --> 00:37:43,838
[tense music playing]
894
00:37:49,421 --> 00:37:51,505
-Cool.
-I'm gonna hand you this.
895
00:37:52,005 --> 00:37:54,671
You gotta tell me
who on earth ever called you "Nicky Guns."
896
00:37:54,755 --> 00:37:57,963
You gotta tell me who didn't call me that.
Everybody called me that.
897
00:37:58,046 --> 00:37:59,713
This is the heaviest goddamn
898
00:37:59,796 --> 00:38:01,130
case of money I've ever felt.
899
00:38:01,213 --> 00:38:03,171
Why couldn't they Venmo?
This thing weighs…
900
00:38:03,255 --> 00:38:04,630
My hands are killing me.
901
00:38:04,713 --> 00:38:06,713
I'm gonna go two hands.
Does that look weird?
902
00:38:06,796 --> 00:38:09,463
-[Audrey] Your hands are cute.
-[Nick] "Cute"? What does that mean?
903
00:38:09,546 --> 00:38:11,921
-You have cute hands.
-Your family has orangutan ha--
904
00:38:12,005 --> 00:38:14,005
You grew up thinking
giant hands are normal.
905
00:38:14,088 --> 00:38:15,463
[Audrey] I never said dainty hands.
906
00:38:15,546 --> 00:38:18,046
I said it's weird to high-five you
'cause your hands are little.
907
00:38:18,130 --> 00:38:19,671
[Nick] They're average hands.
908
00:38:19,755 --> 00:38:22,046
-Your grandmother can palm a bulldog.
-[Audrey] Oh, please.
909
00:38:22,130 --> 00:38:22,963
[phone ringing]
910
00:38:23,046 --> 00:38:24,838
Shit, shit, shit. That's the phone.
911
00:38:24,921 --> 00:38:26,046
Okay, here we go.
912
00:38:26,130 --> 00:38:27,588
Initiate the trace.
913
00:38:27,671 --> 00:38:33,171
Hi. Bonjour, uh, madame or
mademoiselle or monsieur. Go ahead.
914
00:38:33,255 --> 00:38:34,255
[Vik] Nick, it's me!
915
00:38:34,338 --> 00:38:35,338
[screams]
916
00:38:35,421 --> 00:38:36,505
[Nick] Rajah! You okay?
917
00:38:36,588 --> 00:38:39,963
So we got the money, and we just
need to know where to bring it.
918
00:38:40,046 --> 00:38:42,088
So tell us,
and we'll get you out of there.
919
00:38:42,171 --> 00:38:43,796
-[Vik yelps]
-What happened?
920
00:38:43,880 --> 00:38:47,421
[kidnapper] You have your proof of life.
Now take the money to the van at the curb.
921
00:38:47,505 --> 00:38:48,421
Okay.
922
00:38:48,505 --> 00:38:50,796
-Wh-- Wh-- What van?
-Van?
923
00:38:50,880 --> 00:38:52,963
What van are we talking about?
That van there?
924
00:38:53,046 --> 00:38:55,921
[kidnapper] Don't point, you idiot!
Just casually walk in that direction.
925
00:38:56,005 --> 00:38:57,213
Okay. Okay. I'm coming.
926
00:38:57,296 --> 00:38:59,796
[kidnapper] Anything out of the ordinary,
and the Maharajah dies.
927
00:38:59,880 --> 00:39:01,588
Don't do that. Okay, we're coming.
928
00:39:02,255 --> 00:39:03,630
We gotta go to the van.
929
00:39:03,713 --> 00:39:05,338
-That van?
-No! Don't point.
930
00:39:05,421 --> 00:39:06,880
He doesn't like pointing. That van.
931
00:39:09,088 --> 00:39:09,921
Oh shit.
932
00:39:10,005 --> 00:39:11,421
Get in the van.
933
00:39:11,505 --> 00:39:14,296
We'll give you the money
in exchange for the Maharajah.
934
00:39:14,380 --> 00:39:15,296
He's not far.
935
00:39:15,380 --> 00:39:17,171
Get in the van.
936
00:39:17,255 --> 00:39:19,630
-Don't get in the van!
-[Claudette speaking French]
937
00:39:19,713 --> 00:39:22,463
-That wasn't part of the deal.
-Number three. Don't get in the van.
938
00:39:22,546 --> 00:39:25,338
Get in the van,
or I'll shoot you both in the stomach,
939
00:39:25,421 --> 00:39:28,088
take you to the countryside,
and feed you to the swine.
940
00:39:28,171 --> 00:39:30,463
-Okay. Let's get in the van.
-Okay, okay, okay.
941
00:39:30,546 --> 00:39:32,130
Okay, sorry. Yes, yes, yes, yes.
942
00:39:36,963 --> 00:39:38,588
Stupid Americans.
943
00:39:39,380 --> 00:39:40,255
[scoffs]
944
00:39:46,380 --> 00:39:48,088
-Give us the money!
-Give you the money.
945
00:39:48,171 --> 00:39:50,505
-All right. You got it.
-Just give him the money!
946
00:39:50,588 --> 00:39:52,380
-One second.
-I do have these too.
947
00:39:52,463 --> 00:39:53,713
What the fuck?
948
00:39:53,796 --> 00:39:56,505
I brought these for us
in case we wanted to celebrate after,
949
00:39:56,588 --> 00:39:58,171
but I'm gonna change the plans.
950
00:39:58,255 --> 00:40:02,171
So what I'll do is put this on here,
and I'll put this on here.
951
00:40:02,880 --> 00:40:05,130
This goes wherever we go now.
952
00:40:05,213 --> 00:40:07,380
You understand? I don't know where the--
953
00:40:07,463 --> 00:40:08,796
-No!
-What happened?
954
00:40:08,880 --> 00:40:10,171
-What happened?
-Hello?
955
00:40:10,255 --> 00:40:11,296
We're offline?
956
00:40:11,380 --> 00:40:12,546
Stand by.
957
00:40:12,630 --> 00:40:15,963
Take us to the Maharajah now.
What do you think of that?
958
00:40:16,046 --> 00:40:17,255
Chop off his hand.
959
00:40:17,338 --> 00:40:18,380
-Chop off my hand?
-What?
960
00:40:18,463 --> 00:40:20,046
-[kidnapper] Yes!
-No! Hatchet!
961
00:40:20,130 --> 00:40:21,880
-Find the key.
-I do know where the key is.
962
00:40:21,963 --> 00:40:23,546
-Look in here.
-No, no, no. Shoot.
963
00:40:23,630 --> 00:40:25,755
-Shoot, I can't find it.
-Check your other pockets!
964
00:40:25,838 --> 00:40:30,255
Son of a gun! I can't seem
to pull the trigger on finding the key.
965
00:40:30,338 --> 00:40:33,421
-[Audrey] What are you talking about?
-Your gun! Shoot this asshole!
966
00:40:34,005 --> 00:40:35,796
-[grunts]
-[screams]
967
00:40:39,713 --> 00:40:40,838
Oh my God!
968
00:40:44,630 --> 00:40:45,755
[yells, pants]
969
00:40:45,838 --> 00:40:47,380
[yells]
970
00:40:48,671 --> 00:40:49,630
[groans]
971
00:40:49,713 --> 00:40:50,921
[Audrey] Oh my God!
972
00:40:51,005 --> 00:40:52,713
Oh my God, I'm so sorry!
973
00:40:52,796 --> 00:40:55,296
Don't apologize, honey.
You killed the kidnapper!
974
00:40:55,380 --> 00:40:56,463
[all yelling]
975
00:40:56,546 --> 00:40:57,421
Oh my God!
976
00:40:59,671 --> 00:41:01,005
Shoot this guy!
977
00:41:01,088 --> 00:41:03,421
Can I shoot him in the leg?
I don't wanna kill anybody else!
978
00:41:03,505 --> 00:41:06,088
What is the difference?
You're already a murderer!
979
00:41:06,171 --> 00:41:08,088
I don't wanna be a mass murderer!
980
00:41:08,171 --> 00:41:09,546
[both grunting]
981
00:41:11,671 --> 00:41:13,630
-[Nick] Grab the hatchet!
-[Audrey] Okay!
982
00:41:15,755 --> 00:41:16,921
[brakes squeal]
983
00:41:17,005 --> 00:41:18,880
[crowd gasps and exclaims]
984
00:41:18,963 --> 00:41:19,963
[gasps]
985
00:41:20,046 --> 00:41:20,880
What?
986
00:41:20,963 --> 00:41:22,171
[horn honks]
987
00:41:22,255 --> 00:41:23,838
Oh my God!
988
00:41:23,921 --> 00:41:26,255
Sweetheart,
you're not just a mass murderer.
989
00:41:26,338 --> 00:41:27,796
You're an axe murderer!
990
00:41:27,880 --> 00:41:28,880
[yells]
991
00:41:28,963 --> 00:41:30,921
[Audrey] Honey, he's moving. Oh my God.
992
00:41:31,005 --> 00:41:33,046
I think he might be… He might be okay.
993
00:41:33,130 --> 00:41:36,380
[groans] Those are death twitches, honey!
994
00:41:36,463 --> 00:41:37,671
[grunts]
995
00:41:40,588 --> 00:41:42,088
[Audrey] Jesus!
996
00:41:43,130 --> 00:41:44,171
[horns blare]
997
00:41:44,255 --> 00:41:45,505
[Audrey] His foot's on the gas!
998
00:41:47,463 --> 00:41:49,671
-Grab the wheel!
-Oh God!
999
00:41:51,755 --> 00:41:54,630
["Le coeur au bout des doigts"
by Jacqueline Taïeb playing]
1000
00:41:57,296 --> 00:42:00,046
Oh shit! It's so gross!
I touched… I touched it!
1001
00:42:00,838 --> 00:42:01,796
[car horn blares]
1002
00:42:02,463 --> 00:42:05,546
[Nick] Oh yeah! Who's gonna feed who
to the swine now, huh?
1003
00:42:06,130 --> 00:42:08,130
That's the dead guy, Nick!
1004
00:42:08,213 --> 00:42:09,088
Oh yeah.
1005
00:42:09,171 --> 00:42:11,296
[men grunting]
1006
00:42:15,505 --> 00:42:16,380
[Audrey] People, move!
1007
00:42:17,380 --> 00:42:18,421
[horn tooting]
1008
00:42:21,546 --> 00:42:22,588
Oh shit!
1009
00:42:22,671 --> 00:42:24,921
[Nick]
Are you literally hitting everything?
1010
00:42:33,338 --> 00:42:34,671
[Audrey yells]
1011
00:42:35,671 --> 00:42:37,505
[grunting]
1012
00:42:37,588 --> 00:42:40,005
-[Nick] Door's open!
-Oh my God! What did you do?
1013
00:42:44,255 --> 00:42:45,796
[Nick yelling]
1014
00:42:45,880 --> 00:42:47,088
Oh God! Honey!
1015
00:42:51,630 --> 00:42:53,588
Whoa! Oh!
1016
00:42:54,546 --> 00:42:56,213
Oh my God!
1017
00:42:59,630 --> 00:43:00,755
Argh!
1018
00:43:01,588 --> 00:43:02,588
Honey, pole!
1019
00:43:02,671 --> 00:43:04,755
-What?
-There's a pole!
1020
00:43:05,630 --> 00:43:06,588
I can't hear you!
1021
00:43:08,213 --> 00:43:09,171
Oh my God.
1022
00:43:09,255 --> 00:43:10,088
Never mind.
1023
00:43:10,713 --> 00:43:11,713
[Nick yells]
1024
00:43:12,546 --> 00:43:14,546
[dramatic music playing]
1025
00:43:15,880 --> 00:43:17,505
[panting] Okay, baby.
1026
00:43:19,296 --> 00:43:20,838
[both yelling]
1027
00:43:22,838 --> 00:43:24,630
[diners scream and gasp]
1028
00:43:29,880 --> 00:43:31,838
[both panting]
1029
00:43:31,921 --> 00:43:34,255
-Bonjour.
-Bonjour. Are you all okay?
1030
00:43:34,338 --> 00:43:37,088
-[Nick] Sorry. Let me get down.
-[Audrey] Careful. Oh my goodness!
1031
00:43:37,171 --> 00:43:39,046
-Ow! Jesus!
-[Nick] Everybody okay there?
1032
00:43:39,130 --> 00:43:41,130
-Oh my God.
-Hi. Hi. How was lunch?
1033
00:43:41,213 --> 00:43:43,171
[TV playing in background]
1034
00:43:43,963 --> 00:43:44,921
-What?
-What?
1035
00:43:45,005 --> 00:43:46,880
[in French] Nick and Audrey Spitz…
1036
00:43:46,963 --> 00:43:48,463
-What?
-What?
1037
00:43:49,130 --> 00:43:50,296
[Nick] Oh no.
1038
00:43:50,380 --> 00:43:52,088
[newsreader continues in French]
1039
00:43:52,171 --> 00:43:54,005
-[Audrey] Wait. What? No!
-[Nick] What the--
1040
00:43:54,088 --> 00:43:56,296
I didn't take a cheese knife.
I took the cheese!
1041
00:43:56,380 --> 00:43:58,380
Why did you grab it?
Why did you have cheese?
1042
00:43:58,463 --> 00:44:00,796
I had cheese
because I had the hookah munchies,
1043
00:44:00,880 --> 00:44:02,255
and it was good cheese.
1044
00:44:02,338 --> 00:44:04,588
That knife never left the room, Nick.
1045
00:44:04,671 --> 00:44:08,130
But it did leave the room. Maybe they
stole the knife so they could deepfake us.
1046
00:44:08,213 --> 00:44:10,921
-Our fingerprints are all over it!
-C'est caca!
1047
00:44:11,005 --> 00:44:13,421
-We did not do this.
-[French accent] Television say bullshit!
1048
00:44:13,505 --> 00:44:17,130
-We're not capable of doing anything…
-Nous sommes innocents!
1049
00:44:17,213 --> 00:44:18,421
-Innocents!
-…like this.
1050
00:44:18,505 --> 00:44:20,838
Like, uh, opposite of O.J.!
1051
00:44:20,921 --> 00:44:22,546
[Audrey] We would never do this.
1052
00:44:22,630 --> 00:44:24,505
-I swear! I promise you!
-No.
1053
00:44:24,588 --> 00:44:26,213
[all gasp]
1054
00:44:29,588 --> 00:44:31,421
[tires screeching]
1055
00:44:31,505 --> 00:44:32,505
[people clamoring]
1056
00:44:37,921 --> 00:44:38,755
-[Audrey sighs]
-Hey!
1057
00:44:38,838 --> 00:44:39,671
Oh God!
1058
00:44:40,255 --> 00:44:42,296
I told you not to get in the van.
1059
00:44:42,380 --> 00:44:43,588
-We--
-The guy had a gun!
1060
00:44:43,671 --> 00:44:45,630
-What do you mean? You had a gun!
-[Nick] Yeah--
1061
00:44:45,713 --> 00:44:47,796
-I used the gun!
-She used it good!
1062
00:44:47,880 --> 00:44:50,338
Do you see
what they're doing to us on the TV?
1063
00:44:50,421 --> 00:44:52,296
-That's been digitally altered.
-[Nick] Yes!
1064
00:44:52,380 --> 00:44:55,755
-I knew you'd see through that.
-Thank you for noticing. That's a pro.
1065
00:44:55,838 --> 00:44:57,255
Is the case intact?
1066
00:44:58,213 --> 00:44:59,713
[all yelling]
1067
00:45:02,130 --> 00:45:03,713
[laughing] Well!
1068
00:45:03,796 --> 00:45:04,713
We did that!
1069
00:45:04,796 --> 00:45:07,296
-That was nice!
-How did they find us so fast?
1070
00:45:07,380 --> 00:45:08,880
They've got 70 million reasons.
1071
00:45:08,963 --> 00:45:11,296
-Ah!
-Give me the case. Do you have the key?
1072
00:45:11,380 --> 00:45:13,713
The key? For what?
These are sex handcuffs.
1073
00:45:13,796 --> 00:45:15,713
Look. All I gotta do is this.
1074
00:45:17,088 --> 00:45:17,921
[Nick chuckles]
1075
00:45:18,671 --> 00:45:21,005
Okay. When they see me with this,
they'll follow me.
1076
00:45:21,088 --> 00:45:22,630
-[Nick] Right.
-Nothing I can't handle.
1077
00:45:22,713 --> 00:45:23,588
I see that.
1078
00:45:23,671 --> 00:45:25,796
Meet at the Madeleine, 1900 hours.
1079
00:45:25,880 --> 00:45:27,588
No problem. Yeah, we'll be there.
1080
00:45:28,296 --> 00:45:29,963
I was harsh about your business before.
1081
00:45:30,046 --> 00:45:32,713
We may not be equals,
but we do share a passion.
1082
00:45:33,338 --> 00:45:34,380
I see that now.
1083
00:45:34,463 --> 00:45:35,505
Hurrah!
1084
00:45:35,588 --> 00:45:37,630
Hey, I was wrong. That guy is a stud.
1085
00:45:37,713 --> 00:45:38,546
Honey…
1086
00:45:39,296 --> 00:45:40,963
What if Miller's the kidnapper?
1087
00:45:41,046 --> 00:45:43,505
[Nick] He said he's gonna meet us
at 1900 hours at the Madeleine.
1088
00:45:43,588 --> 00:45:45,671
I know, but bad people, they lie.
1089
00:45:45,755 --> 00:45:49,713
All right?
And we just handed the guy $70 million.
1090
00:45:49,796 --> 00:45:52,005
-Oh God. Maybe you're right.
-I'm just saying.
1091
00:45:52,088 --> 00:45:52,921
[engine turns over]
1092
00:45:55,880 --> 00:45:57,713
Nope, you were wrong.
1093
00:46:01,171 --> 00:46:03,671
-Who's this?
-I don't know. Where'd he come from?
1094
00:46:04,921 --> 00:46:07,671
-[Nick] He's gonna walk into the flames?
-He walked right into that.
1095
00:46:09,255 --> 00:46:10,421
He's got the case!
1096
00:46:10,963 --> 00:46:11,796
[man grunts]
1097
00:46:11,880 --> 00:46:13,796
-No! Oh my God!
-Now I'm very confused!
1098
00:46:13,880 --> 00:46:16,046
-[Audrey] Oh no. Who's that guy?
-[Nick] This guy?
1099
00:46:16,130 --> 00:46:16,963
Oh my God!
1100
00:46:18,296 --> 00:46:21,005
[Audrey whispering] N-E-4-1-3-D-A-N.
1101
00:46:21,088 --> 00:46:23,546
We're Europe's most wanted again.
We better run!
1102
00:46:23,630 --> 00:46:25,546
-I'm gonna grab… Okay.
-Grab that hat.
1103
00:46:26,255 --> 00:46:28,130
-What is… Um…
-[Nick] What is this?
1104
00:46:28,213 --> 00:46:31,421
-[Delacroix speaking French]
-[Nick] It's Delacroix! That guy loves us.
1105
00:46:31,505 --> 00:46:33,463
[continues in French]
1106
00:46:33,546 --> 00:46:36,171
-I understood "opera." Okay. Go, go, go!
-Okay. Okay.
1107
00:46:38,130 --> 00:46:40,755
[people clamoring on TV]
1108
00:46:40,838 --> 00:46:43,880
[both singing "Flower Duet" by Delibes]
1109
00:47:13,796 --> 00:47:15,255
-[gasps] How?
-[Audrey] Surprise!
1110
00:47:15,338 --> 00:47:16,296
Audrey and Nick!
1111
00:47:16,380 --> 00:47:19,588
-Smoke rings! How you doing?
-Hi! Did you get our Christmas card?
1112
00:47:19,671 --> 00:47:22,755
I'm fine, and yes.
The matching sweaters were a nice touch.
1113
00:47:22,838 --> 00:47:24,380
-[laughs softly]
-That was my idea.
1114
00:47:24,463 --> 00:47:26,921
So, hey, we need a little bit of help.
1115
00:47:27,005 --> 00:47:28,713
-We need a lot of help.
-[Nick] Yeah.
1116
00:47:29,296 --> 00:47:31,255
-You are under arrest.
-[Nick] No!
1117
00:47:32,130 --> 00:47:34,088
I can never tell
when you're being serious.
1118
00:47:34,171 --> 00:47:35,713
He looks serious. Are you serious?
1119
00:47:35,796 --> 00:47:37,713
For kidnapping the Maharajah,
1120
00:47:37,796 --> 00:47:39,213
murdering his bodyguard,
1121
00:47:39,296 --> 00:47:41,671
stealing $70 million,
1122
00:47:41,755 --> 00:47:43,921
destroying many city blocks,
1123
00:47:44,005 --> 00:47:46,046
and, I'm assuming,
sneaking into the opera.
1124
00:47:46,130 --> 00:47:48,921
-We didn't do all of that.
-We did number four and number six.
1125
00:47:49,005 --> 00:47:50,463
We're just… We're being framed.
1126
00:47:50,546 --> 00:47:52,380
[Nick] We got a hunch who really did it.
1127
00:47:52,463 --> 00:47:54,546
We need you to track
this license plate for us.
1128
00:47:54,630 --> 00:47:56,796
Nothing would give me greater pleasure,
1129
00:47:56,880 --> 00:48:00,963
but then I would have to immediately
report such help to my superiors,
1130
00:48:01,046 --> 00:48:03,296
or I would be guilty
of aiding and abetting.
1131
00:48:03,380 --> 00:48:05,296
How's this? We can tie you up,
1132
00:48:05,380 --> 00:48:08,463
and then you can say
we forced you into helping us.
1133
00:48:08,546 --> 00:48:09,713
[sighs]
1134
00:48:09,796 --> 00:48:11,338
Wait, wait. Who are you calling?
1135
00:48:11,421 --> 00:48:12,963
I'm not calling anyone.
1136
00:48:13,046 --> 00:48:16,130
I have an app
to track the vehicle with that plate.
1137
00:48:16,213 --> 00:48:17,755
They have an app for that?
1138
00:48:17,838 --> 00:48:19,046
-[Delacroix] Mm-hmm.
-Tsk!
1139
00:48:19,130 --> 00:48:21,546
God. You got Shazam on that after?
1140
00:48:21,630 --> 00:48:23,796
I just… I wanna know what song this is.
1141
00:48:24,713 --> 00:48:28,380
[Nick] So the app says
the truck is parked out by a château
1142
00:48:28,463 --> 00:48:30,088
that's 80 kilometers away?
1143
00:48:30,171 --> 00:48:31,921
[Delacroix] Mm-hmm. Excuse me.
1144
00:48:32,005 --> 00:48:33,255
Can you scratch my nose?
1145
00:48:34,255 --> 00:48:35,088
Oh.
1146
00:48:35,171 --> 00:48:36,588
Uh… Uh, softer.
1147
00:48:36,671 --> 00:48:39,255
Softer. Hmm. [moaning]
1148
00:48:41,380 --> 00:48:43,921
-Thank you.
-Also, do you have a car we can borrow?
1149
00:48:44,588 --> 00:48:46,463
-The keys are in my pants pocket.
-[Audrey] Okay.
1150
00:48:46,546 --> 00:48:49,963
You talking to Audrey on that one too?
I'll handle the pants pocket.
1151
00:48:50,046 --> 00:48:52,588
What can I say?
[chuckles] Shooters gotta shoot.
1152
00:48:52,671 --> 00:48:53,630
[Nick chuckles]
1153
00:48:53,713 --> 00:48:56,838
Okay, is this a potato or a key
'cause I'm… Okay, got it.
1154
00:48:56,921 --> 00:48:58,630
-[Audrey] We'll take care of it.
-Hey, hey.
1155
00:48:58,713 --> 00:49:00,421
Okay, no food in my car.
1156
00:49:02,046 --> 00:49:05,630
[Nick] Man, I bet Delacroix's
got a sick-ass vehicle.
1157
00:49:07,380 --> 00:49:08,963
[vehicle humming]
1158
00:49:09,046 --> 00:49:11,296
[Édith Piaf song playing over radio]
1159
00:49:11,380 --> 00:49:12,588
[Colonel speaking indistinctly]
1160
00:49:12,671 --> 00:49:13,755
[cell phone ringing]
1161
00:49:14,338 --> 00:49:15,338
[Colonel] Excuse me.
1162
00:49:17,671 --> 00:49:18,880
Bonsoir, Inspector.
1163
00:49:18,963 --> 00:49:20,796
-Bonsoir, Colonel!
-Enchanté!
1164
00:49:26,296 --> 00:49:27,755
The police are looking for you.
1165
00:49:27,838 --> 00:49:30,630
Yeah, no kidding.
Colonel, we did not do this.
1166
00:49:30,713 --> 00:49:31,713
[Colonel] I know that,
1167
00:49:31,796 --> 00:49:34,296
but they have your fingerprints
all over the murder weapon
1168
00:49:34,380 --> 00:49:36,671
and footage of you
running out of the tent with it.
1169
00:49:36,755 --> 00:49:39,921
-[Nick] Yeah.
-Typical Spitz vacation insanity.
1170
00:49:40,005 --> 00:49:42,088
Miller's dead, by the way,
and we lost the money.
1171
00:49:42,171 --> 00:49:43,671
It just looks like you took it.
1172
00:49:43,755 --> 00:49:46,755
It gets worse! The kidnappers just called.
They've given us
1173
00:49:46,838 --> 00:49:48,755
a midnight deadline
to come up with the money,
1174
00:49:48,838 --> 00:49:50,338
or they will kill the Maharajah.
1175
00:49:50,421 --> 00:49:52,838
Okay, Colonel,
will you just stall for us until then?
1176
00:49:52,921 --> 00:49:55,088
-[Nick] Merci beaucoup!
-[Audrey] Thank you, Colonel!
1177
00:50:02,338 --> 00:50:05,046
[car motor humming]
1178
00:50:08,671 --> 00:50:09,880
Oh my God!
1179
00:50:09,963 --> 00:50:13,046
Well, now you know why
the kidnapper needs $70 million.
1180
00:50:13,130 --> 00:50:14,421
For the heating bill.
1181
00:50:17,838 --> 00:50:19,130
-[inhales sharply]
-[Nick] Uh-huh.
1182
00:50:19,213 --> 00:50:20,421
Oh boy.
1183
00:50:20,505 --> 00:50:24,338
Okay, so that moat's, like, three meters?
1184
00:50:24,838 --> 00:50:26,046
I think I can clear that.
1185
00:50:26,130 --> 00:50:28,338
Nick, three meters is, like, ten feet.
1186
00:50:28,421 --> 00:50:30,921
I had the high school record
for the long jump.
1187
00:50:31,005 --> 00:50:33,963
And I'm not kidding.
I went further than that back in the day.
1188
00:50:34,046 --> 00:50:35,838
-Hmm. Did you?
-Yeah.
1189
00:50:35,921 --> 00:50:38,838
What'd they call you back then?
"Nicky Long Legs"?
1190
00:50:38,921 --> 00:50:39,755
You're mocking me?
1191
00:50:39,838 --> 00:50:41,921
[Audrey] You're not gonna make that jump.
1192
00:50:42,005 --> 00:50:44,421
It doesn't make me feel good
to prove you wrong, but I'm gonna.
1193
00:50:44,505 --> 00:50:45,921
-All right?
-[Audrey] Mm-hmm.
1194
00:50:49,088 --> 00:50:52,130
Okay, from that angle,
it does look further than three meters.
1195
00:50:52,213 --> 00:50:53,546
-Oh shoot.
-What do you think?
1196
00:50:53,630 --> 00:50:56,963
-Do you think maybe you could do it?
-Now you want me to make that jump?
1197
00:50:57,046 --> 00:50:58,046
[gun cocks]
1198
00:50:59,046 --> 00:51:00,130
Bonsoir.
1199
00:51:00,213 --> 00:51:01,463
[both] Countess?
1200
00:51:01,546 --> 00:51:02,880
Surprised?
1201
00:51:02,963 --> 00:51:03,880
[both] Yeah.
1202
00:51:03,963 --> 00:51:05,838
-Did you hear we just said…
-[both] "Countess?"
1203
00:51:07,671 --> 00:51:08,546
Oh God.
1204
00:51:10,130 --> 00:51:11,171
[Audrey groans]
1205
00:51:11,755 --> 00:51:13,005
Where's Vik?
1206
00:51:14,213 --> 00:51:15,755
I guess the kidnappers have him.
1207
00:51:15,838 --> 00:51:17,713
Kid… You're not the kidnappers?
1208
00:51:17,796 --> 00:51:18,796
No, no, no.
1209
00:51:19,380 --> 00:51:22,421
I would never do such a thing.
Vikram is my friend.
1210
00:51:22,505 --> 00:51:23,546
[scoffs] Your friend.
1211
00:51:24,046 --> 00:51:24,963
You loved him.
1212
00:51:26,171 --> 00:51:27,755
[coughing] Oh God!
1213
00:51:27,838 --> 00:51:29,546
-I love money.
-Hmm, hmm, hmm.
1214
00:51:29,630 --> 00:51:32,671
When I heard you two amateurs
are gonna be handling so much of it,
1215
00:51:32,755 --> 00:51:33,796
I just had to have it.
1216
00:51:33,880 --> 00:51:35,921
"Had to have it." [giggles]
1217
00:51:36,005 --> 00:51:38,713
-So you didn't plant that knife?
-Or deepfake that footage?
1218
00:51:38,796 --> 00:51:41,213
Or slip something
into our drinks that night at the villa?
1219
00:51:41,296 --> 00:51:44,921
-Why bring that up? It's not relevant.
-[Audrey] Of course that is relevant!
1220
00:51:45,005 --> 00:51:47,630
-It's extremely relev--
-All right! All right! Jesus!
1221
00:51:47,713 --> 00:51:48,546
-God!
-[Nick] Yo.
1222
00:51:48,630 --> 00:51:50,755
Two bad guys never works out.
1223
00:51:50,838 --> 00:51:53,796
-One always double-crosses the other.
-[Audrey] It's a cliché of the genre.
1224
00:51:53,880 --> 00:51:56,088
-We've seen this before. Trust us.
-So many times.
1225
00:51:56,171 --> 00:51:57,171
-Save yourself.
-Please.
1226
00:51:57,255 --> 00:51:59,755
Imani? Is the car ready for our getaway?
1227
00:51:59,838 --> 00:52:01,546
-Yes, Countess.
-[Countess] Brilliant.
1228
00:52:02,380 --> 00:52:03,838
-No!
-No! Don't!
1229
00:52:03,921 --> 00:52:05,171
[gasps]
1230
00:52:06,213 --> 00:52:08,421
-[Audrey] Oh my God.
-I couldn't have been more clear.
1231
00:52:08,505 --> 00:52:09,796
[Audrey] That is the cliché.
1232
00:52:09,880 --> 00:52:11,046
-Yeah.
-Right there.
1233
00:52:11,130 --> 00:52:11,963
[Nick] Mm-hmm.
1234
00:52:12,046 --> 00:52:15,838
With any luck, the smoke will get to you
before the flames do.
1235
00:52:19,088 --> 00:52:20,421
-[both gasp]
-No!
1236
00:52:21,088 --> 00:52:21,921
Oops.
1237
00:52:23,838 --> 00:52:25,005
-[gunshots]
-[gasps]
1238
00:52:26,713 --> 00:52:27,630
[Audrey] What?
1239
00:52:27,713 --> 00:52:29,880
Triple cross.
1240
00:52:29,963 --> 00:52:31,796
[chuckles, groans]
1241
00:52:34,546 --> 00:52:37,755
Oh my God. We are so getting blamed
for both those assholes being dead.
1242
00:52:37,838 --> 00:52:38,796
[Nick] Let's go!
1243
00:52:38,880 --> 00:52:40,171
-We gotta hop out of here!
-Okay!
1244
00:52:40,255 --> 00:52:42,838
-Come on! Let's go! Let's go! Together!
-[Audrey yelps]
1245
00:52:42,921 --> 00:52:44,588
-Oh my God!
-Go, go, go! Back, back, back!
1246
00:52:44,671 --> 00:52:46,338
To the window! To the window! Go, go!
1247
00:52:46,421 --> 00:52:47,296
Back, back, back!
1248
00:52:47,380 --> 00:52:48,546
-[Audrey] Oh shit!
-[groans]
1249
00:52:48,630 --> 00:52:49,963
-[Audrey] Jesus!
-Are you okay?
1250
00:52:50,046 --> 00:52:52,171
-[Audrey] Are you okay?
-[Nick] You gotta roll away.
1251
00:52:52,255 --> 00:52:54,005
-[Audrey groans]
-No! That way!
1252
00:52:54,088 --> 00:52:54,921
[Audrey groans]
1253
00:52:55,005 --> 00:52:56,630
Oh my God, you're so big!
1254
00:52:56,713 --> 00:53:00,171
That's what you said on our honeymoon,
but like then, we gotta keep trying.
1255
00:53:00,255 --> 00:53:01,838
[both groaning]
1256
00:53:01,921 --> 00:53:05,755
Oh my God, honey! I don't even know
where we're rolling to, honey!
1257
00:53:05,838 --> 00:53:08,088
-[Nick] I don't know!
-[Audrey] Oh my God!
1258
00:53:09,005 --> 00:53:10,713
I was the one who roofied us.
1259
00:53:11,296 --> 00:53:12,546
Wha-- What?
1260
00:53:12,630 --> 00:53:15,130
I mean, you did it,
but it was because of me.
1261
00:53:15,213 --> 00:53:19,588
I keep my Ambien in the Advil bottle
that you use, and I…
1262
00:53:19,671 --> 00:53:21,671
I just get so stressed out. I'm sorry.
1263
00:53:21,755 --> 00:53:22,671
It was all me.
1264
00:53:22,755 --> 00:53:25,463
Don't apologize.
I'm the one who needs to apologize.
1265
00:53:25,546 --> 00:53:28,505
I have been criticizing you so much.
I feel terrible.
1266
00:53:28,588 --> 00:53:30,130
-I'm sorry.
-No. It doesn't matter.
1267
00:53:30,213 --> 00:53:32,380
Your billboards
and dental floss business cards--
1268
00:53:32,463 --> 00:53:35,255
-Dental floss business cards.
-[Audrey] I know, and I didn't think…
1269
00:53:35,338 --> 00:53:37,796
-It's not that it was a bad idea--
-The razor thing on the card!
1270
00:53:37,880 --> 00:53:40,546
I can use it to cut the tape!
I got one in my pocket!
1271
00:53:40,630 --> 00:53:42,463
-Where?
-Right here in the back pocket.
1272
00:53:42,546 --> 00:53:44,630
[Audrey] Oh! Hold on. Hold on! Hold on!
1273
00:53:44,713 --> 00:53:45,963
I'm trying to find it.
1274
00:53:46,046 --> 00:53:47,338
[Nick] Help me. Help me. Get it.
1275
00:53:47,421 --> 00:53:48,421
Get it. Get it. Reach.
1276
00:53:48,505 --> 00:53:51,380
-Reach down. Down. Please, God.
-[Audrey] Got it. I got it!
1277
00:53:51,463 --> 00:53:53,296
Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.
1278
00:53:53,380 --> 00:53:54,921
Are we good? Are we cutting this?
1279
00:53:55,005 --> 00:53:56,630
-Is it working?
-I think it's working.
1280
00:53:56,713 --> 00:53:58,421
[Audrey] Oh my God!
1281
00:53:58,505 --> 00:54:00,171
I love you, dental floss business cards.
1282
00:54:00,255 --> 00:54:02,505
I love you so much.
Oh, please, please, please.
1283
00:54:02,588 --> 00:54:03,796
Yes! Yes!
1284
00:54:03,880 --> 00:54:05,130
Yes!
1285
00:54:05,213 --> 00:54:06,088
Get the feet.
1286
00:54:06,171 --> 00:54:08,338
-I got it!
-[Nick] Come on! Come on! Go! Go!
1287
00:54:09,796 --> 00:54:10,796
[Audrey] Oh no!
1288
00:54:11,380 --> 00:54:13,255
-What are you doing?
-[Nick] Oh God.
1289
00:54:13,338 --> 00:54:16,005
Here, take this.
I'm gonna shoot out the window.
1290
00:54:17,171 --> 00:54:18,130
God!
1291
00:54:19,755 --> 00:54:21,755
My God! It's a French gun!
1292
00:54:21,838 --> 00:54:22,713
[Audrey] Honey!
1293
00:54:22,796 --> 00:54:24,463
-No.
-What?
1294
00:54:25,005 --> 00:54:26,380
No!
1295
00:54:26,463 --> 00:54:29,130
["Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down)"
by Sheila playing]
1296
00:55:01,213 --> 00:55:03,463
Baby! Oh! I love you!
1297
00:55:10,588 --> 00:55:12,130
[both panting]
1298
00:55:12,213 --> 00:55:13,046
Oh God.
1299
00:55:13,755 --> 00:55:14,796
-[turns key]
-[beeping]
1300
00:55:14,880 --> 00:55:15,713
-What?
-No!
1301
00:55:15,796 --> 00:55:18,338
-No, no! No, no, no!
-No, no, no, no, no!
1302
00:55:18,421 --> 00:55:19,755
Shit! Shit!
1303
00:55:19,838 --> 00:55:20,755
Nick.
1304
00:55:21,880 --> 00:55:23,505
["Ti-gars" by Lisa LeBlanc playing]
1305
00:55:25,796 --> 00:55:27,171
This time, I'm driving.
1306
00:55:27,255 --> 00:55:28,088
Okay.
1307
00:55:36,088 --> 00:55:37,463
[Nick strains]
1308
00:55:39,338 --> 00:55:41,421
Are you kidding me? [laughs] I can't…
1309
00:55:42,088 --> 00:55:43,546
You're getting it again, hon.
1310
00:55:43,630 --> 00:55:44,921
-Sorry.
-That's all right.
1311
00:55:48,380 --> 00:55:49,380
[song ends]
1312
00:55:50,671 --> 00:55:52,338
[Delacroix] Mesdames et messieurs…
1313
00:55:52,838 --> 00:55:55,046
My name is Inspector Laurent Delacroix.
1314
00:55:55,880 --> 00:55:59,921
Fifteen minutes ago, Interpol assumed
operational control of this matter
1315
00:56:00,005 --> 00:56:01,921
and assigned me to head the task force.
1316
00:56:02,796 --> 00:56:07,088
Okay, we get it, but why all of a sudden
Interpol gets involved?
1317
00:56:07,171 --> 00:56:09,130
The heinous nature of the crimes.
1318
00:56:09,213 --> 00:56:11,463
Several murders, a kidnapping,
1319
00:56:11,546 --> 00:56:14,046
the destruction
of the oldest café in Paris,
1320
00:56:14,130 --> 00:56:17,963
the tying up of a very handsome opera fan.
1321
00:56:18,046 --> 00:56:19,338
Oh dear God.
1322
00:56:19,421 --> 00:56:23,255
Okay, but why should we believe you'll
be able to find Nick and Audrey Spitz?
1323
00:56:23,338 --> 00:56:25,671
Because I have them on the phone.
1324
00:56:27,171 --> 00:56:29,755
-[Audrey] Hello? Hey. Is everybody there?
-Yes, Audrey.
1325
00:56:29,838 --> 00:56:30,796
Everyone except--
1326
00:56:30,880 --> 00:56:33,005
The Countess and her creepy little friend?
1327
00:56:33,088 --> 00:56:34,921
Give back Vikram, you monsters!
1328
00:56:35,005 --> 00:56:37,296
-You already got the money.
-Yes, we do have the money.
1329
00:56:37,380 --> 00:56:40,505
And if you ever wanna see it again,
you better tell the kidnapper
1330
00:56:40,588 --> 00:56:44,171
to bring the Maharajah
to the Jules Verne restaurant.
1331
00:56:44,255 --> 00:56:45,421
What? The what?
1332
00:56:45,921 --> 00:56:47,296
[Audrey] Jules Verne restaurant.
1333
00:56:47,380 --> 00:56:49,088
Jules Verne restaurant? Ah, Le Ju--
1334
00:56:49,630 --> 00:56:51,296
-Le Jules Verne.
-Oh.
1335
00:56:51,380 --> 00:56:54,338
On the observation deck
at the Eiffel Tower at midnight.
1336
00:56:54,421 --> 00:56:55,255
[Nick] Yes.
1337
00:56:55,338 --> 00:56:56,963
What do you mean?
We don't have my brother.
1338
00:56:57,046 --> 00:56:59,671
-Bullshit!
-Oh, somebody there does, okay?
1339
00:56:59,755 --> 00:57:03,671
So do what my wife just said.
Midnight, Maharajah, alive.
1340
00:57:03,755 --> 00:57:06,505
And, Inspector,
we tried to start your car up
1341
00:57:06,588 --> 00:57:09,130
but, uh, couldn't get it done,
so we left it there.
1342
00:57:09,213 --> 00:57:10,213
What?
1343
00:57:10,296 --> 00:57:12,255
We stole a Lamborghini. You can have that
1344
00:57:12,338 --> 00:57:13,671
when we're done with it.
1345
00:57:13,755 --> 00:57:14,880
Okay.
1346
00:57:16,796 --> 00:57:18,713
[dramatic music playing]
1347
00:57:31,088 --> 00:57:32,046
[bell dings]
1348
00:57:38,046 --> 00:57:40,671
Oh my God. So gorgeous.
1349
00:57:41,880 --> 00:57:43,380
Why are you all dressed up?
1350
00:57:43,463 --> 00:57:45,671
We read online there was a dress code.
1351
00:57:45,755 --> 00:57:48,755
We couldn't get into Tavern on the Green
'cause I was wearing shorts one time.
1352
00:57:48,838 --> 00:57:50,213
-Wh-- Where is everybody?
-Yeah.
1353
00:57:50,296 --> 00:57:53,088
We bought out the restaurant
so we wouldn't be disturbed.
1354
00:57:53,171 --> 00:57:55,421
You do understand
the idea of doing this in public
1355
00:57:55,505 --> 00:57:57,421
is so there are actually people around?
1356
00:57:57,505 --> 00:58:00,713
-How did you even get these clothes?
-And you got your hair done?
1357
00:58:00,796 --> 00:58:02,546
Look, we had a situation, all right?
1358
00:58:02,630 --> 00:58:05,880
There was a moat, and then we did…
I don't have to explain myself, okay?
1359
00:58:05,963 --> 00:58:08,088
We'll be the ones
who ask the questions. How's that?
1360
00:58:08,171 --> 00:58:10,796
-Go ahead. Ask the questions.
-Let's review the suspects, shall we?
1361
00:58:10,880 --> 00:58:11,963
[sighs]
1362
00:58:12,046 --> 00:58:13,130
Get comfortable.
1363
00:58:13,213 --> 00:58:15,755
Let's start with Saira Govindan.
1364
00:58:15,838 --> 00:58:16,838
Me?
1365
00:58:16,921 --> 00:58:17,921
[Audrey] Mm.
1366
00:58:18,005 --> 00:58:19,213
I defended you.
1367
00:58:20,046 --> 00:58:21,338
I actually really liked you.
1368
00:58:21,421 --> 00:58:24,505
I know you did. We really liked you.
You've been so nice to us.
1369
00:58:24,588 --> 00:58:26,130
It's just kind of what we do.
1370
00:58:26,213 --> 00:58:28,630
Kidnap my own brother?
1371
00:58:28,713 --> 00:58:30,713
-She's getting upset.
-I see. She's in front of me.
1372
00:58:30,796 --> 00:58:32,088
Are you out of your mind?
1373
00:58:32,171 --> 00:58:34,130
-Just move on. Audrey, move on.
-Moving on.
1374
00:58:34,213 --> 00:58:35,171
[Nick] All good, Saira.
1375
00:58:35,255 --> 00:58:37,671
[Audrey] Francisco, chairman of the board.
1376
00:58:38,255 --> 00:58:42,213
With the Maharajah gone,
you can embezzle all the money you want
1377
00:58:42,296 --> 00:58:45,380
to cover all those paternity suits
for your 2,000 children.
1378
00:58:45,463 --> 00:58:47,921
I say we make it 2,001, huh?
1379
00:58:48,005 --> 00:58:48,963
Get out of my face.
1380
00:58:49,046 --> 00:58:50,671
Disgusting pig.
1381
00:58:50,755 --> 00:58:52,171
Claudette Joubert.
1382
00:58:52,255 --> 00:58:53,255
Joubert.
1383
00:58:53,338 --> 00:58:56,046
Parisian shopgirl desperate for money.
1384
00:58:56,630 --> 00:58:59,296
If I wanted money,
don't you think I'd just marry him?
1385
00:58:59,380 --> 00:59:01,921
Not with that brutal prenup
the board had you sign.
1386
00:59:03,338 --> 00:59:05,921
But what about the Colonel?
What's his motive?
1387
00:59:06,005 --> 00:59:10,921
Well, maybe he just is sick of working
for rich people 'cause you guys suck.
1388
00:59:11,671 --> 00:59:17,505
Or maybe the Colonel needed enough money
to afford himself
1389
00:59:18,546 --> 00:59:19,963
a bionic arm.
1390
00:59:20,588 --> 00:59:23,463
I looked into it.
They're not very expensive.
1391
00:59:23,546 --> 00:59:26,171
-How much are we talking?
-Twenty, thirty K.
1392
00:59:26,255 --> 00:59:29,213
That's it? Jeez, maybe I should get
something like that.
1393
00:59:29,296 --> 00:59:31,130
You're gonna have to lose an arm for that.
1394
00:59:31,213 --> 00:59:32,921
I wasn't talking about for the arm.
1395
00:59:33,005 --> 00:59:34,380
[chuckles]
1396
00:59:35,171 --> 00:59:38,296
Okay, we went through everybody.
1397
00:59:39,671 --> 00:59:40,630
Who did it?
1398
00:59:40,713 --> 00:59:42,671
[elevator bell dings]
1399
00:59:44,296 --> 00:59:45,546
[shrieks, laughs]
1400
00:59:45,630 --> 00:59:47,630
-[all laughing]
-Mon amour!
1401
00:59:47,713 --> 00:59:49,421
-Hey, hey, hey.
-[Audrey] Whoa, whoa.
1402
00:59:50,880 --> 00:59:53,463
Um, I've been asked to show you all
1403
00:59:53,546 --> 00:59:55,046
this sick-ass bomb and shit.
1404
00:59:55,130 --> 00:59:56,296
[all gasp]
1405
00:59:56,380 --> 00:59:57,671
Oh my God.
1406
00:59:57,755 --> 01:00:00,171
Enough to blow
this whole damn tower up, G.
1407
01:00:00,255 --> 01:00:05,296
So check it. You gotta put the Benjamins
in the lift and send it to the top floor.
1408
01:00:05,380 --> 01:00:09,213
Once the amount has been chickity-checked,
they'll send down the, uh…
1409
01:00:09,296 --> 01:00:12,171
God, what's it called?
The button blaster thingy? The--
1410
01:00:12,255 --> 01:00:14,213
-The remote detonator?
-Yes, that shit.
1411
01:00:14,296 --> 01:00:17,338
They'll send that back down,
and then we can be outtie.
1412
01:00:17,421 --> 01:00:21,588
And it's a bit of a hurry or something
because, you know…
1413
01:00:21,671 --> 01:00:23,630
-[all] Oh no!
-[Audrey] Oh my God, Nick!
1414
01:00:23,713 --> 01:00:26,880
Nick, Nick, Nick. The money.
You must put it in the elevator.
1415
01:00:26,963 --> 01:00:27,796
-Now!
-Nah.
1416
01:00:27,880 --> 01:00:29,296
-"Nah"?
-What do you mean, "nah"?
1417
01:00:29,380 --> 01:00:32,088
-What are you doing?
-I don't think they'll blow him up.
1418
01:00:32,171 --> 01:00:34,713
Nick, are you really just going
on a hunch right now?
1419
01:00:34,796 --> 01:00:35,796
-Trust me.
-[Vik] Nick!
1420
01:00:35,880 --> 01:00:36,713
Bro-heem!
1421
01:00:36,796 --> 01:00:39,463
No, it's all good in the hood, Maharajah.
1422
01:00:39,546 --> 01:00:42,421
Whoever did this
had some serious training, right?
1423
01:00:42,505 --> 01:00:45,088
'Cause he killed Mr. Lou, a lethal badass.
1424
01:00:45,171 --> 01:00:46,880
We're counting down here, G.
1425
01:00:46,963 --> 01:00:48,380
No, no. Nick, Nick, Nick!
1426
01:00:48,463 --> 01:00:51,630
And we know the kidnapper
had some major hacking skills
1427
01:00:51,713 --> 01:00:53,630
to access that footage
and do the deepfake.
1428
01:00:53,713 --> 01:00:55,088
Come on, Nick!
1429
01:00:55,755 --> 01:00:59,796
He knew exactly where to find
Mr. Lou and Vik backstage at the wedding
1430
01:00:59,880 --> 01:01:02,296
in order to pull off
the elephant switcheroo.
1431
01:01:02,380 --> 01:01:04,255
-But, honey--
-Nick! I'm gonna blow up!
1432
01:01:04,338 --> 01:01:06,005
With all that expertise…
1433
01:01:06,088 --> 01:01:07,880
-God, Nick!
-[rapid beeping]
1434
01:01:07,963 --> 01:01:09,838
…this guy should write a book.
1435
01:01:09,921 --> 01:01:11,671
-Oh my God, Nick!
-[all clamoring]
1436
01:01:11,755 --> 01:01:13,046
[Audrey screams]
1437
01:01:14,171 --> 01:01:16,005
[panting]
1438
01:01:17,505 --> 01:01:19,171
[Vik sighs]
1439
01:01:20,088 --> 01:01:21,380
[moans]
1440
01:01:22,130 --> 01:01:27,421
[sighs] "Thousands of studies have shown
that the kidnapper will do nothing
1441
01:01:27,505 --> 01:01:30,213
to jeopardize
the receiving of the ransom."
1442
01:01:30,296 --> 01:01:35,171
Chapter 9, section 3,
written by Mr. Connor Miller.
1443
01:01:35,755 --> 01:01:37,046
You read the book.
1444
01:01:37,130 --> 01:01:38,963
From cover to cover, sweetheart,
and it sucked.
1445
01:01:39,046 --> 01:01:41,046
You gotta try this. It's so good.
1446
01:01:41,130 --> 01:01:43,130
You just scared the crap out of me.
1447
01:01:43,213 --> 01:01:44,796
-[booming]
-[all screaming]
1448
01:01:50,505 --> 01:01:51,671
[Audrey] What was that?
1449
01:01:53,296 --> 01:01:54,171
What?
1450
01:01:57,171 --> 01:01:58,046
Very impressive.
1451
01:01:58,130 --> 01:02:01,005
How did you get out of that SUV
before it blew up?
1452
01:02:01,088 --> 01:02:02,171
I didn't.
1453
01:02:02,713 --> 01:02:05,505
I climbed into a bomb-proof
titanium chamber in the back seat.
1454
01:02:05,588 --> 01:02:09,546
A public death. What better way
to eliminate himself as a suspect.
1455
01:02:09,630 --> 01:02:13,380
Yeah, yeah. But everything didn't go
according to your plan, did it?
1456
01:02:13,463 --> 01:02:17,130
[Audrey] Your guy had his hand on the case
seconds before a clean getaway.
1457
01:02:17,213 --> 01:02:18,755
[Nick] And boom.
1458
01:02:18,838 --> 01:02:20,963
The greedy ex enters the chat.
1459
01:02:21,046 --> 01:02:24,505
Hmm. $70 million. That's a lot of money,
1460
01:02:24,588 --> 01:02:26,171
even for a countess.
1461
01:02:26,255 --> 01:02:29,755
So she sends Imani over
to hijack the hijackers.
1462
01:02:29,838 --> 01:02:31,546
-Who?
-[both] Imani.
1463
01:02:31,630 --> 01:02:33,671
-[Colonel] Who?
-Iman-- The sidekick to the--
1464
01:02:33,755 --> 01:02:35,838
The Countess's… You know, do the laugh.
1465
01:02:35,921 --> 01:02:36,755
Do I have to?
1466
01:02:36,838 --> 01:02:38,546
-Just knock it out.
-[imitates Imani]
1467
01:02:38,630 --> 01:02:39,838
-Okay.
-Oh.
1468
01:02:39,921 --> 01:02:40,755
Now they know.
1469
01:02:40,838 --> 01:02:42,338
And then she swoops in,
1470
01:02:42,421 --> 01:02:45,921
steals the ransom money
right out from under your nose.
1471
01:02:46,005 --> 01:02:47,421
[laughing]
1472
01:02:47,505 --> 01:02:49,171
-That must have hurt.
-Uh-huh.
1473
01:02:49,255 --> 01:02:52,421
Now, if you had, in fact,
read my book properly,
1474
01:02:52,505 --> 01:02:56,880
you'd remember that revealing the identity
of a heretofore anonymous criminal
1475
01:02:56,963 --> 01:03:01,380
puts all those privy
to that information at risk.
1476
01:03:01,463 --> 01:03:02,755
Which means
1477
01:03:04,380 --> 01:03:06,213
I'm gonna have to kill you all.
1478
01:03:06,713 --> 01:03:09,671
-[all clamoring]
-Oh God! [sobs]
1479
01:03:10,338 --> 01:03:11,505
Gary?
1480
01:03:13,213 --> 01:03:14,421
Who the hell are you?
1481
01:03:15,005 --> 01:03:15,880
I'm Susan.
1482
01:03:18,463 --> 01:03:20,630
-Do you know who this is?
-I have no idea.
1483
01:03:20,713 --> 01:03:25,421
Gary and I met here ten years ago
when I was studying abroad,
1484
01:03:25,505 --> 01:03:28,213
and we promised
that if we still loved each other
1485
01:03:28,296 --> 01:03:30,880
and we hadn't found anyone else,
1486
01:03:30,963 --> 01:03:36,171
that we would meet halfway
up the Eiffel Tower at midnight tonight.
1487
01:03:36,255 --> 01:03:37,963
[poignant music playing]
1488
01:03:38,046 --> 01:03:39,880
And I still love him very much.
1489
01:03:41,421 --> 01:03:43,046
Are any of you Gary?
1490
01:03:45,130 --> 01:03:47,005
Put your hand down, Francisco.
1491
01:03:47,088 --> 01:03:48,463
-[Audrey gasps]
-[Nick grunts]
1492
01:03:48,546 --> 01:03:50,046
-[Audrey] Oh my God!
-[all yelling]
1493
01:03:53,130 --> 01:03:53,963
Whoa!
1494
01:03:54,046 --> 01:03:54,963
Oh God!
1495
01:03:55,046 --> 01:03:56,463
[dramatic music playing]
1496
01:04:00,630 --> 01:04:01,755
Get ready.
1497
01:04:01,838 --> 01:04:03,838
[Delacroix panting]
1498
01:04:05,463 --> 01:04:07,213
It just remains for me to say,
1499
01:04:07,296 --> 01:04:08,671
it's been a pleasure.
1500
01:04:10,755 --> 01:04:12,713
He still has the button blaster thingy!
1501
01:04:16,213 --> 01:04:17,421
[Audrey yells]
1502
01:04:17,505 --> 01:04:19,546
-Audrey!
-[Audrey yelling]
1503
01:04:19,630 --> 01:04:21,713
[tense music playing]
1504
01:04:21,796 --> 01:04:22,755
Oh my God!
1505
01:04:23,421 --> 01:04:25,880
No! This is not what I planned!
1506
01:04:33,421 --> 01:04:34,755
[Audrey yells, pants]
1507
01:04:35,546 --> 01:04:37,671
[groaning]
1508
01:04:39,463 --> 01:04:42,255
There really is no end
to your bad decision-making, is there?
1509
01:04:42,880 --> 01:04:45,088
Nick! I can't believe I'm doing this.
1510
01:04:45,171 --> 01:04:46,671
Take my gun. [groans]
1511
01:04:46,755 --> 01:04:49,755
Wait! You need bullets. In my pocket.
1512
01:04:50,255 --> 01:04:52,421
Oh, you little rascal.
1513
01:04:53,005 --> 01:04:55,296
-You got it in there deep, huh?
-You got it.
1514
01:04:55,380 --> 01:04:56,671
[moans]
1515
01:04:56,755 --> 01:04:59,671
[Nick] Susan, put some pressure
on the inspector's wound.
1516
01:04:59,755 --> 01:05:02,171
Is this like an interactive theater thing?
1517
01:05:09,338 --> 01:05:10,796
[grunts, pants]
1518
01:05:10,880 --> 01:05:12,838
I'm glad my biggest fan
is gonna get to see this.
1519
01:05:12,921 --> 01:05:16,005
Actually, not as much of a fan
as I used to be.
1520
01:05:16,088 --> 01:05:18,421
That's a shame because
I'm about to teach my final lesson…
1521
01:05:18,505 --> 01:05:20,088
[weapons cocking]
1522
01:05:20,171 --> 01:05:22,046
How to blow up the Eiffel Tower
and get away with it.
1523
01:05:22,130 --> 01:05:23,463
You would never do that.
1524
01:05:23,546 --> 01:05:26,421
There's only one thing
I hate more than witnesses,
1525
01:05:26,505 --> 01:05:27,671
and that's the French.
1526
01:05:31,255 --> 01:05:34,588
That door opens,
everyone inside is dead, understand?
1527
01:05:34,671 --> 01:05:36,338
-[elevator bell dings]
-[Audrey] Nick!
1528
01:05:37,005 --> 01:05:39,546
No, Nick! No, no! No, no, no!
1529
01:05:40,338 --> 01:05:42,380
Nick! Oh!
1530
01:05:51,171 --> 01:05:52,088
[Claudette] It's stuck.
1531
01:05:52,171 --> 01:05:54,921
-Get this shit off me. I feel vulnerable!
-The vest is a medium.
1532
01:05:55,005 --> 01:05:56,713
You haven't been
a medium since you were 14!
1533
01:05:56,796 --> 01:05:59,171
Just chill out, please!
Get this vest off me.
1534
01:05:59,255 --> 01:06:00,213
You all right?
1535
01:06:00,296 --> 01:06:02,046
[breathless] I need my vape.
1536
01:06:02,130 --> 01:06:04,130
-Okay.
-[Delacroix] In my pocket there.
1537
01:06:04,213 --> 01:06:05,046
The right pocket.
1538
01:06:05,130 --> 01:06:06,213
-This?
-No, no.
1539
01:06:06,296 --> 01:06:07,755
Oh, no. That's your penis.
1540
01:06:07,838 --> 01:06:09,838
-You got it.
-[Susan] Okay, got it. Got it.
1541
01:06:09,921 --> 01:06:12,421
I don't think this is the best thing
for someone who's been shot,
1542
01:06:12,505 --> 01:06:13,546
but go for it.
1543
01:06:13,630 --> 01:06:15,630
[dramatic music playing]
1544
01:06:27,588 --> 01:06:28,838
Here comes Brooklyn.
1545
01:06:28,921 --> 01:06:30,338
[Nick yells]
1546
01:06:33,838 --> 01:06:34,838
[Audrey yelps]
1547
01:06:36,630 --> 01:06:38,338
[yelps, grunts]
1548
01:06:40,046 --> 01:06:41,421
[powering down sound]
1549
01:06:41,505 --> 01:06:42,421
[all clamoring]
1550
01:06:42,505 --> 01:06:43,713
-It stopped!
-Oh!
1551
01:06:43,796 --> 01:06:44,630
[sighs]
1552
01:06:44,713 --> 01:06:47,880
[all laughing]
1553
01:06:49,296 --> 01:06:50,921
[beeping]
1554
01:06:51,005 --> 01:06:52,505
Oh God!
1555
01:06:52,588 --> 01:06:53,796
[all yelling]
1556
01:06:53,880 --> 01:06:55,838
[intense rock music playing]
1557
01:07:01,130 --> 01:07:02,463
Argh!
1558
01:07:05,046 --> 01:07:07,713
[all yelling]
1559
01:07:07,796 --> 01:07:09,088
Cut that damn thing off!
1560
01:07:09,963 --> 01:07:11,963
[fighting grunts]
1561
01:07:15,005 --> 01:07:16,296
[man screams]
1562
01:07:17,838 --> 01:07:19,588
Step back, or this money goes.
1563
01:07:19,671 --> 01:07:21,046
I don't believe you.
1564
01:07:22,963 --> 01:07:25,171
[Nick screams, grunts]
1565
01:07:34,255 --> 01:07:35,088
Uh-uh.
1566
01:07:35,171 --> 01:07:36,005
[grunts]
1567
01:07:36,546 --> 01:07:39,338
How the hell do you do that
without getting a concussion?
1568
01:07:39,421 --> 01:07:40,713
God's gift!
1569
01:07:41,505 --> 01:07:43,213
He will never blink again.
1570
01:07:43,296 --> 01:07:45,963
-[Audrey] Nick!
-Yeah, we're coming, precious!
1571
01:07:46,046 --> 01:07:47,380
Let me handle this, please.
1572
01:07:48,005 --> 01:07:48,921
Oh!
1573
01:07:49,005 --> 01:07:51,671
Perhaps… a mild concussion.
1574
01:07:59,630 --> 01:08:01,671
-Get the thing off!
-We are all gonna blow up!
1575
01:08:01,755 --> 01:08:02,755
I don't know what to do!
1576
01:08:03,546 --> 01:08:04,921
[Nick] It's all good, babe!
1577
01:08:05,588 --> 01:08:07,671
Nicky Two Guns in the house!
1578
01:08:08,421 --> 01:08:11,130
[slow electronic music playing]
1579
01:08:19,005 --> 01:08:20,005
[music stops]
1580
01:08:21,546 --> 01:08:22,880
Did I hit anything?
1581
01:08:22,963 --> 01:08:24,963
You got the detonator thingy, honey!
1582
01:08:25,046 --> 01:08:26,880
Okay, good! That's what I was aiming for!
1583
01:08:26,963 --> 01:08:28,213
-[powers down]
-[Vik] Ooh!
1584
01:08:31,255 --> 01:08:33,255
[all sighing and laughing]
1585
01:08:33,338 --> 01:08:34,463
Oh, my love.
1586
01:08:34,546 --> 01:08:35,796
[Susan sighs]
1587
01:08:40,255 --> 01:08:42,171
The ring. The rings of love.
1588
01:08:43,505 --> 01:08:47,046
Yes. Okay. We're gonna use the guns
for something else now, aren't we, bro?
1589
01:08:47,130 --> 01:08:49,296
Smacked up your friends pretty good.
You're next.
1590
01:08:49,880 --> 01:08:51,046
What's up? What's up?
1591
01:08:53,463 --> 01:08:54,338
Okay.
1592
01:08:56,546 --> 01:08:58,088
Where you going? Babe!
1593
01:08:58,588 --> 01:08:59,421
Audrey!
1594
01:08:59,505 --> 01:09:00,838
[dramatic music playing]
1595
01:09:07,921 --> 01:09:08,796
Honey!
1596
01:09:08,880 --> 01:09:11,921
It's okay, baby! I got you! Just hang on!
1597
01:09:13,671 --> 01:09:15,630
-[groans]
-[whimpering]
1598
01:09:16,380 --> 01:09:17,296
[Audrey straining]
1599
01:09:21,838 --> 01:09:24,671
I must have missed the chapter
on face-kicking.
1600
01:09:27,088 --> 01:09:28,921
[Audrey screams]
1601
01:09:35,755 --> 01:09:37,338
[screams, grunts]
1602
01:09:39,588 --> 01:09:40,880
[yelling]
1603
01:09:45,880 --> 01:09:47,088
[Audrey] Oh my gosh.
1604
01:09:49,713 --> 01:09:51,838
[grunts] Come here.
1605
01:10:02,421 --> 01:10:04,546
It's time to make it rain, bitch.
1606
01:10:07,338 --> 01:10:09,296
[yelling] No!
1607
01:10:10,130 --> 01:10:12,255
[Nick laughing]
1608
01:10:12,338 --> 01:10:13,171
Oh!
1609
01:10:16,588 --> 01:10:17,421
[Susan] Oh!
1610
01:10:19,921 --> 01:10:21,130
[Audrey yells]
1611
01:10:24,046 --> 01:10:24,921
Come to me!
1612
01:10:27,088 --> 01:10:28,546
-[Nick] No!
-[Audrey grunts]
1613
01:10:29,713 --> 01:10:31,296
[panting]
1614
01:10:34,880 --> 01:10:36,671
[Audrey] No, no, no. Okay.
1615
01:10:39,588 --> 01:10:40,921
Finish off the others.
1616
01:10:46,755 --> 01:10:48,671
Oh… Okay.
1617
01:11:01,671 --> 01:11:03,838
[helicopter blades whirring]
1618
01:11:05,421 --> 01:11:08,046
-[Delacroix] What is that?
-That really killed the vibe.
1619
01:11:10,671 --> 01:11:11,838
[Audrey] Hey, Miller!
1620
01:11:14,921 --> 01:11:16,005
My husband was right.
1621
01:11:16,505 --> 01:11:17,880
Your book sucked.
1622
01:11:19,463 --> 01:11:21,338
She never misses.
1623
01:11:22,088 --> 01:11:23,296
[both groaning]
1624
01:11:23,380 --> 01:11:25,088
I'm so sorry!
1625
01:11:25,171 --> 01:11:27,296
-Now you miss?
-I'm sorry, baby! I'm sorry!
1626
01:11:27,380 --> 01:11:30,338
[screaming] Oh shit!
1627
01:11:30,421 --> 01:11:32,546
Goddamn! Are you aiming for me or him?
1628
01:11:32,630 --> 01:11:34,671
Him, I promise! I promise!
1629
01:11:34,755 --> 01:11:36,546
-Just shoot him. Shoot him!
-Shit!
1630
01:11:36,630 --> 01:11:37,671
-Okay.
-[Nick] Shoot him!
1631
01:11:37,755 --> 01:11:40,171
Uh, I've come to the end of my rope,
you know what I mean?
1632
01:11:40,255 --> 01:11:43,213
My wheels are really turning right now.
They're spinnin', my wheels.
1633
01:11:44,005 --> 01:11:45,088
[gun clicking]
1634
01:11:45,171 --> 01:11:46,755
Oh God. Okay.
1635
01:11:49,046 --> 01:11:49,963
Never misses, huh?
1636
01:11:50,880 --> 01:11:53,380
Not everybody
can be as good as you, I guess.
1637
01:11:59,255 --> 01:12:00,671
Enjoy the ride, Miller.
1638
01:12:00,755 --> 01:12:02,380
-[buzzes]
-[gears whirring]
1639
01:12:05,921 --> 01:12:07,088
[gasps]
1640
01:12:08,130 --> 01:12:09,630
[screaming]
1641
01:12:13,546 --> 01:12:15,005
[grunts]
1642
01:12:15,088 --> 01:12:16,380
Oh my God.
1643
01:12:17,963 --> 01:12:19,046
-[Susan shrieks]
-Get down!
1644
01:12:19,796 --> 01:12:20,796
[gasps]
1645
01:12:23,338 --> 01:12:24,755
-[screams]
-[exclaims]
1646
01:12:24,838 --> 01:12:25,921
-Oh!
-Jeez!
1647
01:12:29,796 --> 01:12:31,005
[beeping]
1648
01:12:39,213 --> 01:12:40,671
Paris is very weird.
1649
01:12:41,546 --> 01:12:42,671
He's dead this time.
1650
01:12:42,755 --> 01:12:44,755
-He's so dead.
-He is. It's done.
1651
01:12:45,421 --> 01:12:48,088
How did you come up with that plan?
How do you do that?
1652
01:12:48,171 --> 01:12:49,755
-I have no idea--
-You're a genius.
1653
01:12:49,838 --> 01:12:52,588
It just kinda came out.
Like, I just was like, what? My baby!
1654
01:12:52,671 --> 01:12:55,463
You are next-level! I would
never think of anything that good.
1655
01:12:55,546 --> 01:12:58,296
Thank you. I don't know what I did,
and it was so scary.
1656
01:12:59,463 --> 01:13:01,463
-What?
-We're a team now, hmm?
1657
01:13:01,546 --> 01:13:05,296
-No. No. Get him off. Get him off.
-Don't touch her. It's getting her upset.
1658
01:13:05,380 --> 01:13:06,421
-Back up.
-Just back up.
1659
01:13:06,505 --> 01:13:10,171
You did good, but just back up.
Give us room. Thank you.
1660
01:13:10,796 --> 01:13:13,213
-Oh, babe.
-It's all right. I love you, baby.
1661
01:13:13,296 --> 01:13:14,213
That was just…
1662
01:13:14,296 --> 01:13:16,796
It's kind of
a beautiful Paris night besides that.
1663
01:13:17,296 --> 01:13:18,255
Yeah.
1664
01:13:19,213 --> 01:13:21,213
[romantic music playing]
1665
01:13:24,421 --> 01:13:26,588
[applause]
1666
01:13:26,671 --> 01:13:27,671
Yes. Hey!
1667
01:13:27,755 --> 01:13:31,380
-[Colonel] Nick! Audrey!
-Hey! You guys did it again! Oh!
1668
01:13:31,463 --> 01:13:34,921
-Vik, I am so sorry about the money.
-Yes, we apologize.
1669
01:13:35,005 --> 01:13:36,421
It was a lot of money to throw away.
1670
01:13:36,505 --> 01:13:39,088
I think Paris is gonna thank you
from the bottom of their hearts.
1671
01:13:39,171 --> 01:13:42,713
Don't worry about it. Just as long as
none of my peeps got murked, yeah?
1672
01:13:42,796 --> 01:13:44,963
[laughs] Apart from Mr. Lou.
1673
01:13:45,046 --> 01:13:46,880
Oh, yeah, that's true.
1674
01:13:46,963 --> 01:13:49,505
-[laughs]
-Lou who, huh? [laughs]
1675
01:13:49,588 --> 01:13:52,713
Oh no. What happened to you?
Why are you bleeding?
1676
01:13:52,796 --> 01:13:55,255
Oh, no. It's… I'm not. It's henna.
1677
01:13:55,338 --> 01:13:57,296
It must have smeared
in tonight's commotion.
1678
01:13:57,921 --> 01:14:00,755
Oh, thank God. I'm sick.
I can't take one more accident tonight.
1679
01:14:00,838 --> 01:14:02,005
No more blood, please.
1680
01:14:02,088 --> 01:14:05,130
-I swear, I thought it was blood.
-I am exhausted. Aren't you?
1681
01:14:05,213 --> 01:14:06,046
[chuckles]
1682
01:14:06,130 --> 01:14:07,005
[Vik] Yeah.
1683
01:14:08,838 --> 01:14:12,171
-What are you muttering about right now?
-Something doesn't make sense.
1684
01:14:12,255 --> 01:14:14,671
[mysterious music playing]
1685
01:14:15,296 --> 01:14:17,213
I'm sorry. It just doesn't make any sense.
1686
01:14:17,296 --> 01:14:19,046
Saira, I'm so sorry. What…
1687
01:14:19,130 --> 01:14:23,046
Did you just say you smeared your henna
during tonight's commotion?
1688
01:14:23,130 --> 01:14:24,255
That's right.
1689
01:14:25,380 --> 01:14:26,505
That's interesting.
1690
01:14:27,005 --> 01:14:29,088
[scoffs] Why is that interesting?
1691
01:14:29,171 --> 01:14:30,713
[Nick] Yes, why is that interesting?
1692
01:14:30,796 --> 01:14:35,130
You know, I never saw you
during the welcome dance.
1693
01:14:35,213 --> 01:14:39,130
And then you just kind of showed up
right after the elephant arrived.
1694
01:14:39,213 --> 01:14:40,130
Yeah.
1695
01:14:40,213 --> 01:14:42,338
I was… I was getting a drink. [laughs]
1696
01:14:42,421 --> 01:14:46,463
Honey, I was a hairdresser,
and I know a thing or two about dyes,
1697
01:14:46,546 --> 01:14:48,171
and once henna sets,
1698
01:14:48,921 --> 01:14:50,255
it doesn't smear.
1699
01:14:51,713 --> 01:14:54,671
Sorry. I… I have no idea
what you're talking about.
1700
01:14:55,171 --> 01:14:58,338
That wasn't blood that I saw
on the elephant handler's robe.
1701
01:14:58,421 --> 01:14:59,796
It was henna.
1702
01:14:59,880 --> 01:15:03,630
And it was your henna that never had time
to dry the night of the murder.
1703
01:15:03,713 --> 01:15:05,380
Oh my God!
1704
01:15:05,463 --> 01:15:06,838
The sister did it!
1705
01:15:06,921 --> 01:15:08,713
Oh snap!
1706
01:15:08,796 --> 01:15:12,005
Come on. This is lunacy!
You guys, haven't we done this already?
1707
01:15:12,088 --> 01:15:15,255
I love my brother.
I mean, what reason would I have to--
1708
01:15:15,338 --> 01:15:18,838
Maybe because your parents gave him
the family business,
1709
01:15:18,921 --> 01:15:20,546
even though you're the smart one,
1710
01:15:20,630 --> 01:15:23,630
and he's the Jet Skiing rapper wannabe
with no skill at all?
1711
01:15:24,213 --> 01:15:25,046
No offense.
1712
01:15:25,130 --> 01:15:26,338
Some taken.
1713
01:15:26,421 --> 01:15:29,838
And isn't that the same reason
you tried to kill him in Mumbai?
1714
01:15:30,421 --> 01:15:31,380
You!
1715
01:15:32,546 --> 01:15:34,921
Well, my parents
were right about one thing.
1716
01:15:35,963 --> 01:15:37,838
If you need something done correctly,
1717
01:15:38,630 --> 01:15:40,380
you should just do it yourself.
1718
01:15:41,421 --> 01:15:42,338
[screaming]
1719
01:15:42,421 --> 01:15:43,671
-[Vik] Saira!
-[Audrey gasps]
1720
01:15:43,755 --> 01:15:45,046
[Colonel] No!
1721
01:15:46,046 --> 01:15:48,630
Oh! This poor guy, honey!
He's running out of arms!
1722
01:15:50,088 --> 01:15:50,963
Whoa!
1723
01:15:51,546 --> 01:15:52,588
Not in my town.
1724
01:15:52,671 --> 01:15:54,921
Yeah! That's my bae!
1725
01:15:55,005 --> 01:15:56,380
[sighs] Thank you, baby.
1726
01:15:56,463 --> 01:15:57,713
I've got to just…
1727
01:15:58,296 --> 01:16:00,755
-'Sup! It's okay. Yeah.
-[Colonel groans]
1728
01:16:00,838 --> 01:16:04,130
You… You did great, pal.
You're my number one bodyguard.
1729
01:16:04,213 --> 01:16:06,171
And not just 'cause
the last one got smoked.
1730
01:16:06,255 --> 01:16:09,130
That Kwanzaa bonus
better be off the hook this year.
1731
01:16:09,213 --> 01:16:12,630
Hey, it's bionic arm time, bitch! Yeah?
1732
01:16:12,713 --> 01:16:13,880
-Yeah?
-Yeah!
1733
01:16:13,963 --> 01:16:14,796
[both laugh]
1734
01:16:15,546 --> 01:16:16,546
[Susan] You're okay.
1735
01:16:17,421 --> 01:16:19,630
-How are you feeling, young man?
-How are you doing?
1736
01:16:19,713 --> 01:16:22,630
-I'm okay.
-Laurent is a special man. Aren't you?
1737
01:16:22,713 --> 01:16:25,046
We're gonna go to dinner
once you get out of the hospital.
1738
01:16:25,130 --> 01:16:26,213
Ah!
1739
01:16:26,296 --> 01:16:29,046
Paris weaves its spell once again.
1740
01:16:29,130 --> 01:16:30,296
Feel better.
1741
01:16:30,380 --> 01:16:32,255
-All right.
-[Vik] Should we tell them?
1742
01:16:32,338 --> 01:16:36,130
-Yes! [laughs]
-Okay, guys. We decided to elope.
1743
01:16:36,213 --> 01:16:38,838
-That is the smart choice, always.
-That's amazing.
1744
01:16:38,921 --> 01:16:39,796
Good for you guys.
1745
01:16:39,880 --> 01:16:42,005
Yeah, no family, but, um,
1746
01:16:42,630 --> 01:16:43,880
I owe you guys my life.
1747
01:16:43,963 --> 01:16:46,255
Oh, we're just happy you're both okay.
1748
01:16:46,338 --> 01:16:49,046
And really, honestly, thank you
for giving us an adventure…
1749
01:16:49,130 --> 01:16:49,963
Yes.
1750
01:16:50,046 --> 01:16:51,755
…we are never going to forget.
1751
01:16:51,838 --> 01:16:52,796
-Oh.
-Yep.
1752
01:16:52,880 --> 01:16:55,421
-I guess we're even then. Peace out.
-Peace out!
1753
01:16:55,921 --> 01:16:56,921
-Bye-bye.
-Au revoir!
1754
01:16:57,005 --> 01:16:59,546
Sorry about your sister
being a psycho, by the way.
1755
01:16:59,630 --> 01:17:01,921
Ah, don't worry about it.
She's a real piece of shit.
1756
01:17:02,005 --> 01:17:03,338
-Yes, she was.
-[both] Yeah.
1757
01:17:03,421 --> 01:17:05,546
-[Nick] Okay.
-Honey, I'm really ready to go home.
1758
01:17:05,630 --> 01:17:07,671
-Yes, I am too.
-I'm really ready.
1759
01:17:09,130 --> 01:17:10,921
We have to do one thing first.
1760
01:17:11,755 --> 01:17:14,630
-Trust me. Trust me. All right?
-What? Okay. Okay. Okay.
1761
01:17:14,713 --> 01:17:17,380
-[Nick] Check on the Colonel. You okay?
-[Audrey] Colonel!
1762
01:17:17,463 --> 01:17:18,838
You're not losing this arm?
1763
01:17:18,921 --> 01:17:21,546
["Et Moi, Et Moi, Et Moi"
by Jacques Dutronc playing]
1764
01:17:29,796 --> 01:17:31,921
[Nick] Click it. Click it. We did it.
1765
01:17:32,671 --> 01:17:36,630
Now we are forever locked up together
for the rest of our lives.
1766
01:17:36,713 --> 01:17:38,838
I'd never wanna be locked up
with anybody else.
1767
01:17:38,921 --> 01:17:41,005
Me neither, sweetheart. You are--
1768
01:17:41,088 --> 01:17:43,088
-[man] The Shitz!
-What?
1769
01:17:43,171 --> 01:17:45,338
[chuckles] Nick and Audrey Shitz!
1770
01:17:45,421 --> 01:17:48,338
-The helicopter guy? What the--
-What are you doing here?
1771
01:17:48,421 --> 01:17:49,588
Take it. Take the phone!
1772
01:17:50,088 --> 01:17:51,046
Hello?
1773
01:17:51,130 --> 01:17:53,796
[Vik] Of course we're not even.
Take my helicopter!
1774
01:17:53,880 --> 01:17:57,963
Go anywhere! Have a honeymoon you deserve!
And a little cash!
1775
01:17:58,046 --> 01:18:00,130
-What?
-Cash? A bag of--
1776
01:18:00,213 --> 01:18:01,588
-Are you for real?
-[Nick laughs]
1777
01:18:01,671 --> 01:18:04,713
-Oh my gosh. Look! Oh my--
-Well, yeah.
1778
01:18:04,796 --> 01:18:07,088
That seems to be enough money. Thank you.
1779
01:18:07,171 --> 01:18:09,546
[Vik] Just ten million!
Don't spend it all in one place!
1780
01:18:09,630 --> 01:18:11,338
But if you do spend it all,
1781
01:18:11,421 --> 01:18:12,713
just sell the briefcase.
1782
01:18:12,796 --> 01:18:14,255
It's worth three million!
1783
01:18:14,338 --> 01:18:16,421
-It's dinosaur leather!
-My God!
1784
01:18:16,505 --> 01:18:18,796
Dinosaur? We can't take this! Come on!
1785
01:18:18,880 --> 01:18:21,130
You know what?
We will take this. Thank you.
1786
01:18:21,213 --> 01:18:24,088
[Vik] Now you two keep busting nuts!
Maharajah out!
1787
01:18:24,171 --> 01:18:26,005
What's the first thing you wanna do?
1788
01:18:26,088 --> 01:18:27,755
-I wanna kiss you!
-Ah!
1789
01:18:31,380 --> 01:18:32,630
I can't believe this!
1790
01:18:32,713 --> 01:18:34,713
[uplifting music playing]
1791
01:18:39,463 --> 01:18:41,421
-My baby.
-My darling.
1792
01:18:41,505 --> 01:18:43,671
The honeymoon we always deserved.
1793
01:18:43,755 --> 01:18:45,255
-Exactly.
-Finally.
1794
01:18:45,338 --> 01:18:47,296
[both] Mm-hmm.
1795
01:18:47,380 --> 01:18:49,546
Can you believe how lucky we are?
1796
01:18:50,338 --> 01:18:51,630
-[gun cocks]
-[gasps]
1797
01:18:52,671 --> 01:18:54,296
[American accent] You liking those drinks?
1798
01:18:54,380 --> 01:18:56,463
-What--
-Are you shitz-ing us right now?
1799
01:18:56,546 --> 01:18:57,838
Hand me the bag.
1800
01:18:57,921 --> 01:18:59,296
What? The, uh--
1801
01:18:59,380 --> 01:19:01,588
-Bag. Hand me the bag.
-You want this?
1802
01:19:01,671 --> 01:19:03,630
-That's not a problem.
-Give him the bag.
1803
01:19:03,713 --> 01:19:05,463
[Nick] What happened to the accent?
1804
01:19:06,296 --> 01:19:07,421
It's back in Jersey.
1805
01:19:07,505 --> 01:19:09,630
Let's just have a civilized conversation.
1806
01:19:09,713 --> 01:19:11,463
[pilot] See you never, Shitzes!
1807
01:19:11,546 --> 01:19:15,338
-Oh my God! Where did he--
-Oh my God! Oh-- Oh my--
1808
01:19:16,046 --> 01:19:17,338
["Spellbinding" by
The Smashing Pumpkins plays]
1809
01:19:17,421 --> 01:19:19,713
♪ Take me away, I'm gonna find you ♪
1810
01:19:22,463 --> 01:19:26,630
♪ Take me away, I'm gonna find you ♪
1811
01:19:28,671 --> 01:19:35,171
♪ 'Cause nobody else could ever mind you
Ooh, ooh ♪
1812
01:19:35,255 --> 01:19:39,588
♪ Take me away, I'm gonna find you ♪
1813
01:19:41,130 --> 01:19:43,130
♪ Can you feel this? ♪
1814
01:19:43,213 --> 01:19:45,171
♪ Can you feel this? ♪
1815
01:19:45,255 --> 01:19:50,171
♪ I can feel it for you tomorrow ♪
1816
01:19:50,255 --> 01:19:52,380
♪ It's all in, baby ♪
1817
01:19:52,463 --> 01:19:54,130
♪ Looks all hazy ♪
1818
01:19:54,213 --> 01:19:57,421
♪ So I've gone crazy ♪
1819
01:20:08,963 --> 01:20:12,671
♪ Take me away, I'm gonna find you ♪
1820
01:20:15,380 --> 01:20:19,546
♪ Take me away, I'm gonna find you ♪
1821
01:20:21,671 --> 01:20:28,171
♪ 'Cause nobody else could ever mind you
Ooh, ooh ♪
1822
01:20:28,255 --> 01:20:31,130
♪ Take me away, I'm gonna find you ♪
1823
01:20:31,213 --> 01:20:33,005
♪ Through, through this ♪
1824
01:20:33,088 --> 01:20:37,880
♪ Right while I was writing my own song ♪
1825
01:20:39,421 --> 01:20:42,838
♪ Raise your eyes and glass ♪
1826
01:20:48,463 --> 01:20:52,296
♪ Take me away, I'm gonna find you ♪
1827
01:20:54,838 --> 01:20:59,046
♪ Take me away, I'm gonna find you ♪
1828
01:21:01,213 --> 01:21:07,588
♪ 'Cause nobody else could ever mind you
Ooh, ooh ♪
1829
01:21:07,671 --> 01:21:10,171
♪ Take me away ♪
1830
01:21:14,130 --> 01:21:16,630
♪ Take me away ♪
1831
01:21:24,255 --> 01:21:26,963
[tense orchestral music playing]
1832
01:27:30,088 --> 01:27:33,088
[triumphant orchestral music playing]