1 00:00:02,840 --> 00:00:06,799 This programme contains very strong language 2 00:00:06,800 --> 00:00:08,440 PLATFORM PA ANNOUNCEMENTS 3 00:00:12,120 --> 00:00:13,479 Destiny. 4 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:15,119 The thing that I believed 5 00:00:15,120 --> 00:00:17,839 predetermined all great love stories. 6 00:00:17,840 --> 00:00:20,199 The idea that the romantic events 7 00:00:20,200 --> 00:00:24,119 of our lives were scripted in stardust, long, long ago. 8 00:00:24,120 --> 00:00:26,680 I just had to follow the signs to find them. 9 00:00:27,960 --> 00:00:31,599 This particular tale of destiny begins on a train. 10 00:00:31,600 --> 00:00:35,359 The year is 2012. According to the Mayan calendar, 11 00:00:35,360 --> 00:00:36,999 the world is about to end. 12 00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:39,919 Which would have been a real bummer, because I was 24, 13 00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:43,080 and my adult life had just finally begun. 14 00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:52,639 Please, can I get a mini bottle of red wine, 15 00:00:52,640 --> 00:00:55,840 and a mini bottle of white wine, and a mini bottle of Jameson's? 16 00:01:02,160 --> 00:01:03,719 BEEPING 17 00:01:03,720 --> 00:01:05,319 Yeah, that card's been declined. 18 00:01:05,320 --> 00:01:06,519 Definitely not. 19 00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:07,719 Definitely has. 20 00:01:07,720 --> 00:01:09,879 I checked my online banking at the station. 21 00:01:09,880 --> 00:01:11,839 There was loads of money in my account, 22 00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:12,999 and by loads I mean £32.74. 23 00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:15,759 It says you have insufficient funds. 24 00:01:15,760 --> 00:01:17,319 I'll get it. 25 00:01:17,320 --> 00:01:19,519 No, no. Don't worry. 26 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:20,999 So that same order, again, 27 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:25,840 for Shane MacGowan. And just a beer for me, please. 28 00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:29,240 SHE SNIFFS 29 00:01:35,040 --> 00:01:36,479 I was doing market research. 30 00:01:36,480 --> 00:01:38,239 And you sit in a room with, like, 31 00:01:38,240 --> 00:01:40,719 30 other people and you answer questions for 32 00:01:40,720 --> 00:01:43,279 the car company about whether you'd drive the car. 33 00:01:43,280 --> 00:01:45,519 And where was today's? Bristol. 34 00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:46,959 And would you drive the car? 35 00:01:46,960 --> 00:01:50,160 Dunno. Can't drive! 36 00:01:51,520 --> 00:01:54,799 This obviously isn't my long-term plan. I want to write. 37 00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:56,759 So what do you want to write? 38 00:01:56,760 --> 00:02:01,079 Really, really good stories. And comments. 39 00:02:01,080 --> 00:02:02,559 Comments? 40 00:02:02,560 --> 00:02:05,759 Yeah, I want to be amazing at comments and witticisms. 41 00:02:05,760 --> 00:02:07,799 I want all my comments to be published in one 42 00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:09,959 of those cheap books you pick up by the till. 43 00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:12,679 Until then, I'll basically do anything other than murder 44 00:02:12,680 --> 00:02:16,040 for 40 quid, cash in hand. Is that bad? 45 00:02:17,240 --> 00:02:18,799 How old are you? 46 00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:20,719 24. 47 00:02:20,720 --> 00:02:23,839 I'd say you've got two more years left of getting away with it. 48 00:02:23,840 --> 00:02:25,399 How old are you? 49 00:02:25,400 --> 00:02:27,319 27. Just out of the middle. 50 00:02:27,320 --> 00:02:30,119 How was it? 51 00:02:30,120 --> 00:02:31,999 Well, I think Larkin got it right. 52 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:33,799 What did he say? 53 00:02:33,800 --> 00:02:37,839 I feared these present years. The middle twenties. 54 00:02:37,840 --> 00:02:39,839 When deftness disappears. 55 00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:41,839 And each event is freighted with 56 00:02:41,840 --> 00:02:45,760 a source-encrusting doubt and turned to drought. 57 00:02:47,560 --> 00:02:49,200 Fit. 58 00:02:53,600 --> 00:02:55,679 What's your favourite band? 59 00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:59,160 Come on. You're better than this. What? 60 00:03:00,880 --> 00:03:03,599 Asking me what my favourite things are. 61 00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:07,039 Like you're a teenage girl filling out a Myspace profile. 62 00:03:07,040 --> 00:03:10,439 That is incredibly patronising. 63 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:12,520 I think you like being patronised by men. 64 00:03:13,840 --> 00:03:15,879 Gives you something to push against, 65 00:03:15,880 --> 00:03:19,239 like you're a shrew to be tamed, or something. 66 00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:20,719 I don't want to be tamed. 67 00:03:20,720 --> 00:03:22,200 You just want our attention. 68 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:27,919 Ladies and gentlemen, 69 00:03:27,920 --> 00:03:30,079 we will shortly be arriving into London Paddington, 70 00:03:30,080 --> 00:03:31,800 that's our final stop. 71 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:34,919 SHE CHUCKLES 72 00:03:34,920 --> 00:03:36,760 It was really lovely to meet you. 73 00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:41,239 Street. "Street?" 74 00:03:41,240 --> 00:03:43,439 I know. It's where I was conceived. 75 00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:44,799 No way. 76 00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:47,039 It's true. 77 00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:48,759 God. I'm just trying 78 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:51,439 to think what my parents would have called me if I was named after where 79 00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:54,960 I was conceived. Pocket-sprung mattress. 80 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:57,439 I've always wondered, 81 00:03:57,440 --> 00:03:59,639 with people who are named after places, like, 82 00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:02,040 whether they ever actually live in the... 83 00:04:10,120 --> 00:04:12,600 I've been waiting to do that since Slough. 84 00:04:16,760 --> 00:04:19,320 "Pocket-sprung mattress?" 85 00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:29,519 Are you getting the Tube? 86 00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:31,599 Nah. I'll walk home. 87 00:04:31,600 --> 00:04:34,799 Really committed to this troubadour shit, aren't you? 88 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:36,640 Fucking works, though, doesn't it? 89 00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:44,959 Let's not give each other our numbers. 90 00:04:44,960 --> 00:04:46,119 Why? 91 00:04:46,120 --> 00:04:48,279 Because I think if we're meant to meet again, 92 00:04:48,280 --> 00:04:52,799 we'll meet again. Leave it to kismet. Destiny. 93 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:55,160 You must be so, so bored. 94 00:05:01,720 --> 00:05:04,400 I'm Maggie. 95 00:05:24,320 --> 00:05:26,759 That boy, that kiss, 96 00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:28,839 that train journey would begin 97 00:05:28,840 --> 00:05:32,199 a series of events that would change my life. 98 00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:34,559 I don't know what my 20s would've been like if 99 00:05:34,560 --> 00:05:36,439 I hadn't got on that exact train 100 00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:38,359 and sat in that exact carriage. 101 00:05:38,360 --> 00:05:42,999 I can only tell you everything that happened after I did. 102 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:45,160 This is a story of great love. 103 00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:48,640 But it's not the one you think it is. 104 00:06:14,320 --> 00:06:16,639 Maggs? Yeah. 105 00:06:16,640 --> 00:06:19,959 You ready? Yeah. 106 00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:23,200 But first I need to ask you a really serious question. 107 00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:27,960 What is it? 108 00:06:31,880 --> 00:06:33,279 Is it hard, 109 00:06:33,280 --> 00:06:36,359 being the prettiest girl in the entire world? 110 00:06:36,360 --> 00:06:39,039 Seriously, we're leaving in five minutes. 111 00:06:39,040 --> 00:06:41,399 OK, well, that's exactly how long it takes me to get ready. 112 00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:45,599 Don't even try that, I've known you your whole life. 113 00:06:45,600 --> 00:06:47,000 Nell, Amara. Wine. 114 00:06:50,640 --> 00:06:53,159 Why is no-one ready? 115 00:06:53,160 --> 00:06:56,039 Just sorted out the feng shui in my room. Had a nap. 116 00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:57,399 Wrote my will. 117 00:06:57,400 --> 00:06:59,839 Oh, what's it say? Just "will", at the moment. 118 00:06:59,840 --> 00:07:01,799 OK, can we stop writing wills and having naps? 119 00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:03,279 It's meant to be ladies' night. 120 00:07:03,280 --> 00:07:06,119 I didn't agree to ladies' night. Yeah, it's ladies' night! 121 00:07:06,120 --> 00:07:07,999 Yes, mate! 122 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:10,159 I propose a toast. Ooh, Maggs, in your will, 123 00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:12,119 can I have your fake Prada sunglasses? 124 00:07:12,120 --> 00:07:13,519 Nell. 125 00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:16,439 To the first Friday night in our first London house! 126 00:07:16,440 --> 00:07:18,879 CHEERING 127 00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:21,279 And to many more Friday nights. 128 00:07:21,280 --> 00:07:24,559 Look at all those Friday nights piled up just for us. 129 00:07:24,560 --> 00:07:26,599 How are we going to get through them all? 130 00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:29,079 OK, I really do think that we should leave by eight. 131 00:07:29,080 --> 00:07:32,799 Oh, Birdy, you need to relax. You're just... 132 00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:34,679 You are so rushed off your feet. 133 00:07:34,680 --> 00:07:36,999 Aww... Rushed off your feet! 134 00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:41,159 I've told you before, I don't like it. I've told you I don't like it! 135 00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:43,919 I've said a thousand times, I don't like it! 136 00:07:43,920 --> 00:07:47,600 Well, then, stop being the littlest one, then! 137 00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:51,159 OK, so I think if we start at the Chalk Farm end 138 00:07:51,160 --> 00:07:53,439 and make our way up to the Mornington Crescent end. 139 00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:54,839 I think we don't make a plan. 140 00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:57,519 All the best nights happen when we just follow our noses. 141 00:07:57,520 --> 00:07:59,319 Agreed. 142 00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:03,799 Oh, have you heard from that guy on the train? 143 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:06,199 No. But I didn't think I would. 144 00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:08,679 We didn't exchange surnames or numbers. 145 00:08:08,680 --> 00:08:10,559 Thought it would be romantic. 146 00:08:10,560 --> 00:08:12,399 Definitely your idea, not his. 147 00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:14,439 If I met a man I fancied, who fancied me back, 148 00:08:14,440 --> 00:08:17,359 I'd make him write his number on my face with a permanent marker. 149 00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:20,359 Oh, don't be so dramatic, Birdy. Anyway, 150 00:08:20,360 --> 00:08:22,759 there we are, met the boy of my dreams, 151 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:25,279 probably the only boy I could see myself ever truly loving 152 00:08:25,280 --> 00:08:26,839 and now he's gone. 153 00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:30,999 Oh, come on, babe. This isn't like you. 154 00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:36,599 We've just arrived in London. City of possibilities! 155 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:38,239 There will be others. 156 00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:39,599 Not like this one. 157 00:08:39,600 --> 00:08:42,159 I've put a winning lottery ticket in the washing machine. 158 00:08:42,160 --> 00:08:45,440 Well done for not being dramatic about it, though. Thanks. 159 00:08:52,360 --> 00:08:54,399 Thank you. And cheers. 160 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:55,880 ALL: Cheers! 161 00:08:57,920 --> 00:09:00,359 Let's play Never Have I Ever. Yes. No. 162 00:09:00,360 --> 00:09:02,679 This game is only enjoyable for half of the group. 163 00:09:02,680 --> 00:09:04,839 And it's not the half who have had two sexual partners. 164 00:09:04,840 --> 00:09:06,079 Or have never taken drugs. 165 00:09:06,080 --> 00:09:08,160 So whatever you want to say, just say it. 166 00:09:09,720 --> 00:09:11,640 Amara, you had a threesome in Malaga. 167 00:09:13,360 --> 00:09:15,999 Maggie, you wanked at the back of 168 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:18,960 the coach on a school trip to Stonehenge. Yeah, game done. 169 00:09:21,640 --> 00:09:22,919 Ta-da! 170 00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:24,280 LAUGHTER 171 00:09:33,120 --> 00:09:35,199 SCRAPES 172 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:37,159 Do you think that's enough? Yeah. 173 00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:38,199 DOOR KNOCKS 174 00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:41,119 Oh, God, the Feds. Hide it in your pocket. No. I'm a teacher. 175 00:09:41,120 --> 00:09:43,759 BIRDY: Guys? Oh, for God's sake. 176 00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:45,480 Birdy, get in. 177 00:09:46,880 --> 00:09:48,959 OK. If I took it... YES! 178 00:09:48,960 --> 00:09:51,919 If I took it, are you sure I won't die? 179 00:09:51,920 --> 00:09:54,519 You are so suburban, Birdy, you're not going to die. 180 00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:57,479 No-one has ever died from taking cocaine. Not true. 181 00:09:57,480 --> 00:09:58,999 It is completely harmless, 182 00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:02,119 it's a very sort of two point four children, 183 00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:05,479 L-shaped sofa type of drug. You just dip in and out of it, 184 00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:08,319 like, erm, like... Hummus? 185 00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:10,119 Genius girl. Hummus. Exactly. 186 00:10:10,120 --> 00:10:12,519 I don't think I will. Why? 187 00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:14,359 I don't want to get dizzy. 188 00:10:14,360 --> 00:10:16,279 Do you want to die with some stories or do you 189 00:10:16,280 --> 00:10:18,520 want to sleepwalk into your own grave? 190 00:10:25,440 --> 00:10:26,960 BIRDY SNIFFS 191 00:10:29,640 --> 00:10:31,839 Feel like I'm in Trainspotting. 192 00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:34,520 You're literally wearing a dress from Karen Millen. 193 00:10:42,320 --> 00:10:45,839 Bottle of your cheapest white, please. And four glasses. 194 00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:47,359 Cheers, mate. 195 00:10:47,360 --> 00:10:49,119 Hey! 196 00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:50,679 Hey. 197 00:10:50,680 --> 00:10:53,639 Do you recognise me? 198 00:10:53,640 --> 00:10:55,239 Yeah. Were you on one 199 00:10:55,240 --> 00:10:57,679 of those early series of Big Brother? 200 00:10:57,680 --> 00:10:59,559 No... No. I'm Maggie. 201 00:10:59,560 --> 00:11:02,519 We met on a train? A couple of weeks ago? 202 00:11:02,520 --> 00:11:06,359 Oh, yeah. Sorry. My brain's fried. How are you? 203 00:11:06,360 --> 00:11:08,160 I'm good. 204 00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:11,799 Who are you here with? 205 00:11:11,800 --> 00:11:14,279 Oh, my friends. My housemates. 206 00:11:14,280 --> 00:11:16,639 We've just moved in together down the road. 207 00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:18,959 Interesting. What? 208 00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:21,559 Moving to Camden in 2012. 209 00:11:21,560 --> 00:11:23,919 Whoever you're looking for has already left. 210 00:11:23,920 --> 00:11:25,239 What are you doing here, then? 211 00:11:25,240 --> 00:11:26,759 Gig. 212 00:11:26,760 --> 00:11:28,359 How did it go? 213 00:11:28,360 --> 00:11:31,439 Fine. I mean, everyone talked through the whole set, 214 00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:33,839 all the white people clapped on the on-beat, 215 00:11:33,840 --> 00:11:37,439 just another Friday night in a completely forgettable band. 216 00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:40,839 We're, er, we're actually heading off now. 217 00:11:40,840 --> 00:11:46,039 OK. It was really nice to see you again. 218 00:11:46,040 --> 00:11:48,800 Yeah, you too. 219 00:11:51,320 --> 00:11:52,999 I could give you my number this time? 220 00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:54,639 Do I not have your number? 221 00:11:54,640 --> 00:11:56,400 No, we decided... 222 00:11:58,160 --> 00:12:00,000 I don't think we exchanged numbers. 223 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:07,759 What is this? 224 00:12:07,760 --> 00:12:10,279 Oh, yeah. I hate smartphones. 225 00:12:10,280 --> 00:12:13,079 You know, I read recently that our brains are actually changing shape 226 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:15,679 because of how much time we're spending online. 227 00:12:15,680 --> 00:12:18,679 Yeah, soon, we won't be able to concentrate on anything. 228 00:12:18,680 --> 00:12:22,919 Reading a novel will be as niche an activity as, like, bell-ringing. 229 00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:24,520 Dark. 230 00:12:41,840 --> 00:12:43,680 Who was that?! 231 00:12:45,440 --> 00:12:47,559 I am literally going to shit myself. 232 00:12:47,560 --> 00:12:49,559 I'm hoping this is another example of your misuse of 233 00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:50,959 the word literally. 234 00:12:50,960 --> 00:12:53,279 That...was the fucking...train guy. 235 00:12:53,280 --> 00:12:54,559 No. 236 00:12:54,560 --> 00:12:57,239 Yes. See, Nell? Destiny. 237 00:12:57,240 --> 00:13:00,279 Oh, my God, he's even more beautiful than I remembered. 238 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:01,959 What's his name? Street. 239 00:13:01,960 --> 00:13:05,399 He was named after where he was conceived. Oh, have a day off. 240 00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:08,399 Sorry, Nell. I'm here for it. I am backing our girl, 241 00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:11,799 this is fate. It is too weird not to be. 242 00:13:11,800 --> 00:13:14,079 And, and he uses an old Nokia 243 00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:17,719 because he believes smartphones are bad for our brains. 244 00:13:17,720 --> 00:13:20,479 It's like he's some kind of... Cunt? 245 00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:22,359 ..philosopher? 246 00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:24,799 I can't believe I saw him. Can you believe it? 247 00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:28,839 I cannot believe it. Where's Birdy? 248 00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:29,999 Oh, God knows. 249 00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:31,799 I now get why she doesn't take drugs. 250 00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:33,719 It's been like watching Elmo get high. 251 00:13:33,720 --> 00:13:35,199 Maggs, Maggs, 252 00:13:35,200 --> 00:13:37,320 come here, I want you to meet these guys. 253 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:43,399 This is my best friend, Maggie, she's literally amazing, 254 00:13:43,400 --> 00:13:45,079 we've known each other since school. 255 00:13:45,080 --> 00:13:46,999 The other two are great and we love them, 256 00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:49,639 but this girl is my childhood sweetheart. 257 00:13:49,640 --> 00:13:51,079 Do you ever have it where, like, 258 00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:53,239 you want to invent a new version of marriage, 259 00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:55,959 it's just for two people who promise to love each other forever, 260 00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:58,399 they don't have sex or anything, they just hang out loads? 261 00:13:58,400 --> 00:14:00,839 Yes. But there's still, like, a formal commitment. 262 00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:04,079 I totally agree. Like, shouldn't there be a word for it? 263 00:14:04,080 --> 00:14:05,800 Erm... Friendship? 264 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:08,960 Yes! 265 00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:16,639 MUSIC: Down With The Trumpets by Rizzle Kicks 266 00:14:16,640 --> 00:14:18,159 # Yes 267 00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:20,040 # Rizzle kicks... # 268 00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:23,560 Four beers, please. 269 00:14:25,560 --> 00:14:27,840 MUSIC CONTINUES 270 00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:45,240 MUSIC CONTINUES 271 00:15:52,680 --> 00:15:54,600 CHEERING 272 00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:02,960 LAUGHTER 273 00:16:05,480 --> 00:16:07,159 I want to roll down the hill! 274 00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:09,080 ALL: YES! 275 00:16:11,640 --> 00:16:14,040 ALL SHRIEK 276 00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:20,199 Come on! 277 00:16:20,200 --> 00:16:22,520 No, I don't want to get dizzy. 278 00:16:24,120 --> 00:16:25,919 Come on, come on! 279 00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:28,120 CHEERING 280 00:17:33,880 --> 00:17:35,840 BELL RINGS 281 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:40,199 Can I sit here? 282 00:17:40,200 --> 00:17:41,800 Yeah. 283 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:50,399 I like your key-rings. 284 00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:51,840 Thanks. 285 00:17:53,040 --> 00:17:54,639 How many are on there? 286 00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:58,999 13. I like your braces. What colour are they? 287 00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:01,159 Glitter magenta. 288 00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:02,959 I'm Maggie. 289 00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:04,280 I'm Birdy. 290 00:18:06,360 --> 00:18:09,039 You know, it shows how much I love you, 291 00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:11,799 that I don't mind you doing this every morning. 292 00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:14,679 I barely like doing this with someone I'm sleeping with. 293 00:18:14,680 --> 00:18:16,120 I know. 294 00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:22,839 I spent all my money again last night, buying drinks for 295 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:25,799 a load of people I'll never, ever see again. 296 00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:28,159 Why did you buy them drinks? 297 00:18:28,160 --> 00:18:32,399 To make them like me without having to talk. 298 00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:34,439 I'll lend you. 299 00:18:34,440 --> 00:18:36,560 You can't lend me any more money. 300 00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:39,519 I'll just go back to the bank 301 00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:42,399 and see if they'll let me extend my overdraft. 302 00:18:42,400 --> 00:18:45,159 I thought you already went last week and they said no. 303 00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:47,079 I'll try again. 304 00:18:47,080 --> 00:18:49,440 I don't think it works like a tombola. 305 00:18:51,480 --> 00:18:52,840 I'm such an idiot. 306 00:18:55,320 --> 00:18:58,600 No you're not. You're so fun. 307 00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:03,879 I'm a tragic drunk who buys all the rounds. 308 00:19:03,880 --> 00:19:05,999 You think being fun is easy 309 00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:08,279 because it comes so naturally to you. 310 00:19:08,280 --> 00:19:10,919 But being fun is not easy. 311 00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:14,559 You're someone who actually likes skinny dipping 312 00:19:14,560 --> 00:19:18,439 and wearing bandannas and playing snooker at the pub 313 00:19:18,440 --> 00:19:22,119 and putting hot sauce on everything. 314 00:19:22,120 --> 00:19:24,439 You know, that's special. 315 00:19:24,440 --> 00:19:28,440 Maybe the cost of being that special is always being overdrawn. 316 00:19:32,520 --> 00:19:35,799 I just don't think that's right at all. 317 00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:40,159 It is. I've spent years trying to learn how to be fun, from you. 318 00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:41,920 You are fun. 319 00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:45,039 Like when? 320 00:19:45,040 --> 00:19:49,479 Like when you bought those... 321 00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:54,999 ..pink, neon, flared combat trousers with 322 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:57,439 the strings hanging off! 323 00:19:57,440 --> 00:19:59,359 Or when you went on that 324 00:19:59,360 --> 00:20:02,239 Thorpe Park roller-coaster four times. 325 00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:05,439 You'd come off, sip of water, straight back in the queue. 326 00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:07,120 It was incredible. 327 00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:13,999 So I've been fun, like, twice in my life. 328 00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:15,399 But that's OK. 329 00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:18,639 I'm much better at things like judging how long 330 00:20:18,640 --> 00:20:20,199 a car journey is going to take. 331 00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:22,320 Hmm. You are really good at that. 332 00:20:24,240 --> 00:20:25,719 I love you. 333 00:20:25,720 --> 00:20:30,480 Oh, I love you. Oh, I wish you'd wear pants. 334 00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:36,919 How are you feeling? 335 00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:38,199 Bad. 336 00:20:38,200 --> 00:20:41,079 I cannot believe you guys did poppers last night. 337 00:20:41,080 --> 00:20:42,759 We live in Camden now. 338 00:20:42,760 --> 00:20:45,799 Doing poppers in Camden is like eating a croissant in Paris. 339 00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:47,599 DOORBELL RINGS 340 00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:49,039 I'll get it. 341 00:20:49,040 --> 00:20:51,719 That'll be your boyfriend, Nell. 342 00:20:51,720 --> 00:20:54,679 Hi, Neil. Don't eat that straight from the jar. 343 00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:55,999 Hi, guys. 344 00:20:56,000 --> 00:20:58,039 Oh, my gosh. 345 00:20:58,040 --> 00:21:00,679 YES! We've got a telly. 346 00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:03,919 My sister had a spare one in her attic. 347 00:21:03,920 --> 00:21:05,799 Thanks, babe. 348 00:21:05,800 --> 00:21:07,999 Right, there is going to be a zero-tolerance policy 349 00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:11,799 for anyone taking those batteries out of the remote for their personal devices. 350 00:21:11,800 --> 00:21:13,079 Unless it's an emergency. 351 00:21:13,080 --> 00:21:14,519 What personal devices? 352 00:21:14,520 --> 00:21:15,800 Vibrators and dillies. 353 00:21:17,880 --> 00:21:19,599 Anyway, thanks, man. 354 00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:21,720 Yeah. No worries. 355 00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:27,119 How's finance going? 356 00:21:27,120 --> 00:21:28,439 Law. 357 00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:30,600 - And Man U? - Arsenal. 358 00:21:31,880 --> 00:21:33,319 We've got to go to work. 359 00:21:33,320 --> 00:21:34,799 See you tonight. 360 00:21:34,800 --> 00:21:37,119 Bye. Bye. 361 00:21:37,120 --> 00:21:39,320 Thanks again for the telly, Neil. 362 00:21:41,480 --> 00:21:43,480 Hello. Hi. 363 00:21:45,600 --> 00:21:47,120 HE SIGHS 364 00:21:53,320 --> 00:21:56,319 I wonder if our degrees are ever going to come good. 365 00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:58,879 I just don't think a 2:1 in English 366 00:21:58,880 --> 00:22:01,719 and Drama says anything to an employer other than... 367 00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:03,279 .."I'm completely average. 368 00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:06,479 "I have got a Breakfast At Tiffany's poster on my wall and I can't think for myself." 369 00:22:06,480 --> 00:22:08,879 I found my degree certificate while I was unpacking. 370 00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:10,279 Used it as a coaster. 371 00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:12,080 TEXT ALERT 372 00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:16,559 Oh, my God, it's Street. 373 00:22:16,560 --> 00:22:17,959 What did he say? 374 00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:19,239 "Hey, sugar, 375 00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:21,879 "come round mine tonight to listen to some albums." 376 00:22:21,880 --> 00:22:26,399 Hmm. I wonder how many "albums" you're going to "listen to". 377 00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:28,919 I think I shouldn't have sex with him. What do you think? 378 00:22:28,920 --> 00:22:31,639 I've never even had a boyfriend, don't look to me for advice. 379 00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:33,880 That'll do, pig, that'll do. 380 00:22:35,240 --> 00:22:37,159 Kids eat for half-price today. 381 00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:41,479 Look, you have to get over this never-having-a-boyfriend stuff. 382 00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:45,039 You have to admit, it's weird. I'm a quarter of a century old. 383 00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:46,599 Look, we're in this grubby, 384 00:22:46,600 --> 00:22:48,799 golden phase of life that is so short-lived. 385 00:22:48,800 --> 00:22:50,399 We should just enjoy it 386 00:22:50,400 --> 00:22:53,119 for what it is. We need experiences. 387 00:22:53,120 --> 00:22:57,199 Having a relationship is an experience. Isn't it? 388 00:22:57,200 --> 00:22:59,119 What are you going to wear? 389 00:22:59,120 --> 00:23:03,079 I don't know, something quite understated, I think. 390 00:23:03,080 --> 00:23:05,079 He's so cool and I'm so not 391 00:23:05,080 --> 00:23:07,879 and he needs to not know what a try-hard I am. 392 00:23:07,880 --> 00:23:11,040 MUSIC: Femme Fatale by the Velvet Underground 393 00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:20,960 IMITATING NICO: # Here she comes 394 00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:25,840 # You better watch your step 395 00:23:27,360 --> 00:23:33,119 # She's going to break your heart in two 396 00:23:33,120 --> 00:23:35,880 # It's true... # 397 00:23:38,080 --> 00:23:39,919 That is a good Nico impression. 398 00:23:39,920 --> 00:23:41,280 I told you. 399 00:23:54,040 --> 00:23:57,119 You were really lame at school, weren't you? 400 00:23:57,120 --> 00:23:59,279 You were, weren't you? 401 00:23:59,280 --> 00:24:03,639 You were a loser who wore rockabilly dresses and ate 402 00:24:03,640 --> 00:24:06,079 Toffee Crisps in the school toilets. 403 00:24:06,080 --> 00:24:08,200 How insightful. 404 00:24:09,440 --> 00:24:10,999 Do the Nico voice again. 405 00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:12,079 No. 406 00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:14,560 Do it, Big Bird. 407 00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:23,959 Hello. Oh, God, that's my flatmate, Nathan. 408 00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:26,679 He's not actually my mate. He works in insurance. 409 00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:28,160 I found him on Gumtree. 410 00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:33,319 All right? 411 00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:36,479 All right? Nathan, this is Maggie. 412 00:24:36,480 --> 00:24:38,240 Hi. Hi! 413 00:24:42,120 --> 00:24:44,199 Er, don't worry, I'll be out of your way soon, 414 00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:46,439 I'm just getting changed, then going to the gym. 415 00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:48,519 Nathan's marathon training. 416 00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:50,799 Wow, amazing. How's it going? 417 00:24:50,800 --> 00:24:54,999 Er, pretty bad, to be honest. Yeah, painful and boring. 418 00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:56,759 Why are you doing it? 419 00:24:56,760 --> 00:24:59,479 I don't know. Something to do. 420 00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:02,439 Nathan needs to have sex. And then he'll stop... 421 00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:04,279 What's that word you 422 00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:06,639 and your mates use at the gym? Grating. 423 00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:09,199 Shredding. Have you got any single friends? 424 00:25:09,200 --> 00:25:10,959 Er, that isn't necessary. 425 00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:14,679 Yeah, loads. Maybe I'll give you Birdy's number. 426 00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:16,199 Was she there the other night? 427 00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:18,239 Yeah, she's the little one with dark hair. 428 00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:19,999 She's the best person in the world. 429 00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:21,439 Who were those other two? 430 00:25:21,440 --> 00:25:23,599 Nell and Amara. We met them at uni. 431 00:25:23,600 --> 00:25:25,119 Nell's got a boyfriend, though, 432 00:25:25,120 --> 00:25:26,759 and Amara only ever seems 433 00:25:26,760 --> 00:25:30,239 to date spoken-word performers or Southern Europeans. 434 00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:34,959 That doesn't seem to be your immediate vibe, 435 00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:37,039 if you don't mind me saying. 436 00:25:37,040 --> 00:25:39,239 Birdy it is. Thanks, mate. 437 00:25:39,240 --> 00:25:40,680 I'll give you her number. 438 00:25:50,680 --> 00:25:51,879 Cheers. 439 00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:54,159 Er, well, you guys have a good evening. 440 00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:56,120 MOBILE PHONE RINGS 441 00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:00,319 Yo, Tank? 442 00:26:00,320 --> 00:26:01,599 Tank? 443 00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:04,519 Yeah, yeah, I know, mate, I'll be there shortly. 444 00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:06,439 Well, just try to grab 445 00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:09,199 the dumbbells before anyone else does. 446 00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:11,839 Do you see what I mean? Yeah. But he's nice, though. 447 00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:14,479 Yeah, but just the kind of guy who's 448 00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:18,159 a bit too into barbecued food, you know? Hmm. Or who says... 449 00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:21,439 "Brazilian women are THE sexiest women on Earth." 450 00:26:21,440 --> 00:26:22,880 Exactly. 451 00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:33,599 I'm having people over on Friday night. 452 00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:36,479 You know, play some music. Get fucked up. 453 00:26:36,480 --> 00:26:39,599 Do you want to come? You could do your Nico. 454 00:26:39,600 --> 00:26:41,040 Maybe. 455 00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:46,480 We're out of wine. Whisky? 456 00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:53,039 Erm, I think I'm actually going to head off. 457 00:26:53,040 --> 00:26:54,359 Oh. 458 00:26:54,360 --> 00:26:57,160 Yeah, just... work and stuff to do tomorrow. 459 00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:02,120 Bye, Street. 460 00:27:06,680 --> 00:27:07,999 One more time, one more time. 461 00:27:08,000 --> 00:27:09,519 No... No. I can't rap. 462 00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:10,759 Stop calling it a "rap". 463 00:27:10,760 --> 00:27:12,439 You're really good. Come on. 464 00:27:12,440 --> 00:27:13,960 MUSIC STARTS 465 00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:17,599 # I woke up today 466 00:27:17,600 --> 00:27:22,879 # With this feelin' that better things are comin' my way 467 00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:26,879 # And if the sunshine has meaning Telling me not 468 00:27:26,880 --> 00:27:30,039 # To let things get in my way 469 00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:34,239 # When the rainy days are dyin' Got to keep on, keep on tryin' 470 00:27:34,240 --> 00:27:36,199 # All the bees and birds are flyin' 471 00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:38,159 # Aaaaah 472 00:27:38,160 --> 00:27:39,759 # Never let go, got to hold on and 473 00:27:39,760 --> 00:27:43,159 # Nonstop till the break of dawn and keep movin', don't stop rockin' 474 00:27:43,160 --> 00:27:44,839 # Aaaaah 475 00:27:44,840 --> 00:27:48,999 # Get on up when you're down, baby Take a good look around... # 476 00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:50,399 Hi! 477 00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:51,719 Thank God. 478 00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:53,239 MUSIC STOPS 479 00:27:53,240 --> 00:27:55,599 Shoes off. How'd it go? 480 00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:59,279 Yeah. Good, I think. Playing the long game. 481 00:27:59,280 --> 00:28:02,319 Kiss? Yeah. Nothing else, though. 482 00:28:02,320 --> 00:28:05,039 I'm, erm, eking it out. 483 00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:08,119 Don't want to use up all of his attention too quickly, you know? 484 00:28:08,120 --> 00:28:10,119 When's his birthday? Dunno. 485 00:28:10,120 --> 00:28:11,679 I can find out. What's his name? 486 00:28:11,680 --> 00:28:14,119 Baxter. Street Baxter. 487 00:28:14,120 --> 00:28:16,719 Wait, what do you mean, "use up his attention"? 488 00:28:16,720 --> 00:28:18,359 He's either into you or he isn't. 489 00:28:18,360 --> 00:28:21,119 Hmm. I think he probably has loads of other girls on the go. 490 00:28:21,120 --> 00:28:23,599 So there's an allotted amount of attention for each of us. 491 00:28:23,600 --> 00:28:24,959 That is so rank. 492 00:28:24,960 --> 00:28:26,639 Gemini. Knew it. 493 00:28:26,640 --> 00:28:28,839 I'm the one in control, though. I left. 494 00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:31,679 So now I'm going to go upstairs, watch videos of his band on YouTube, 495 00:28:31,680 --> 00:28:33,119 and wank furiously. 496 00:28:33,120 --> 00:28:35,079 It's all very feminist-y, don't worry. 497 00:28:35,080 --> 00:28:37,519 OK, we need to talk about that word again. 498 00:28:37,520 --> 00:28:39,599 I've got your star sign compatibility trial here. 499 00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:42,079 Do you want me to email it to you? Yeah, obviously. 500 00:28:42,080 --> 00:28:43,399 Done. 501 00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:44,959 Oh, what if he thinks I'm frigid? 502 00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:47,920 I wish someone thought I was frigid. 503 00:28:57,760 --> 00:29:01,440 Things can only get batter at Amy Lou's Pancake House. 504 00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:05,160 TEXT ALERT 505 00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:08,279 Oh, unknown number. 506 00:29:08,280 --> 00:29:09,799 Oh, I got that one. 507 00:29:09,800 --> 00:29:12,119 Chicken dippers free with every large pizza. 508 00:29:12,120 --> 00:29:14,479 Weird, it's from some guy called Nathan. 509 00:29:14,480 --> 00:29:16,879 No way! What? 510 00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:18,319 That's Street's flatmate. 511 00:29:18,320 --> 00:29:20,239 He asked me if I had any single friends, 512 00:29:20,240 --> 00:29:23,559 so I gave him your number. That is so random he text you. 513 00:29:23,560 --> 00:29:25,519 Such a 30-year-old thing to do. 514 00:29:25,520 --> 00:29:28,439 Well, it's not "random" at all if you gave him my number. 515 00:29:28,440 --> 00:29:30,359 What's he like? 516 00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:32,519 Fine. I only chatted to him briefly, 517 00:29:32,520 --> 00:29:35,199 but he seems completely average and normal. 518 00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:37,479 Surely that's good? Not really. 519 00:29:37,480 --> 00:29:39,559 You know when you need to buy something practical 520 00:29:39,560 --> 00:29:41,839 but you don't want to spend too much money on it? 521 00:29:41,840 --> 00:29:44,599 He's like that. He's like a light bulb or a plug adaptor. 522 00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:47,999 So, is he tall? Is he short? I don't know, what does he do? 523 00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:51,519 He is tall. Plain of face, 524 00:29:51,520 --> 00:29:54,560 sort of a potato-smiley-shaped face. 525 00:29:56,160 --> 00:29:59,279 I think Street said he worked in recruitment. 526 00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:01,959 Or energy. Some sort of boring abstract noun. 527 00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:03,199 He sounds nice. 528 00:30:03,200 --> 00:30:05,279 Yeah, but you could do loads better. 529 00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:08,119 I don't think I'm as fussy as you. I'm not fussy. 530 00:30:08,120 --> 00:30:09,759 Maybe I'll end up with a plug adaptor. 531 00:30:09,760 --> 00:30:11,279 I hate when you say stuff like that. 532 00:30:11,280 --> 00:30:13,079 You're not going to end up with a plug adaptor, 533 00:30:13,080 --> 00:30:15,279 you're going to end up with someone dazzling. 534 00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:16,959 I don't want to end up with someone "dazzling", 535 00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:18,279 I feel tired even saying that word. 536 00:30:18,280 --> 00:30:20,719 You make it sound like we all need to go out with Elton John. 537 00:30:20,720 --> 00:30:22,439 Fine, go for it. 538 00:30:22,440 --> 00:30:25,039 Seems like a really unstressful shag. 539 00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:26,559 Shall I reply now? 540 00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:29,399 Or is that too soon? Oh, I'm schwitzing. 541 00:30:29,400 --> 00:30:31,839 And what will you say? 542 00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:36,359 Erm... "Dinner sounds lovely." 543 00:30:36,360 --> 00:30:40,759 He asked you for dinner? That's mental. 544 00:30:40,760 --> 00:30:44,319 You're not going to agree to that, are you? What are you saying? 545 00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:46,079 Stop being so nosy. 546 00:30:46,080 --> 00:30:48,039 Let me see what you're going to say. 547 00:30:48,040 --> 00:30:49,639 MAGGIE LAUGHS 548 00:30:49,640 --> 00:30:52,279 Give it back. Give it back, Maggs. 549 00:30:52,280 --> 00:30:55,079 No, no. Give it back! 550 00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:56,839 Ah! 551 00:30:56,840 --> 00:30:58,199 Oh, Birdy. 552 00:30:58,200 --> 00:30:59,639 Maggs. Can you help me? Quickly. 553 00:30:59,640 --> 00:31:01,840 Grab my arm. Please. Can you grab my both my arms? 554 00:31:05,040 --> 00:31:06,799 How long has she been getting ready? 555 00:31:06,800 --> 00:31:08,400 Three and a half hours. 556 00:31:14,080 --> 00:31:15,479 Birdy? 557 00:31:15,480 --> 00:31:16,920 I'm fine. 558 00:31:17,920 --> 00:31:19,400 I'm coming in. 559 00:31:22,160 --> 00:31:23,959 I'm not fine, I'm freaking out. 560 00:31:23,960 --> 00:31:25,839 OK. Talk to me. 561 00:31:25,840 --> 00:31:28,279 I'm just so nervous about what we're going to talk about 562 00:31:28,280 --> 00:31:29,799 and whether I hug him hello. 563 00:31:29,800 --> 00:31:31,919 And what... what do I wear? 564 00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:34,039 OK, you need to chill out. I know. 565 00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:36,519 First things first. I know you're stressed. 566 00:31:36,520 --> 00:31:39,879 But what is the one thing you and I have always sworn 567 00:31:39,880 --> 00:31:43,200 to each other? Always, no matter what? 568 00:31:44,520 --> 00:31:46,999 That we would never wear a waist belt with a dress. 569 00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:48,319 Why? 570 00:31:48,320 --> 00:31:50,880 Because it doesn't nip in your waist, that's a lie. 571 00:31:53,080 --> 00:31:55,600 OK. Already much better. 572 00:32:00,400 --> 00:32:02,879 What's this? It's a list of things 573 00:32:02,880 --> 00:32:05,159 to talk about in case there are any awkward silences. 574 00:32:05,160 --> 00:32:06,959 Council tax? Yeah. 575 00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:09,479 Russell Brand? Maggie! 576 00:32:09,480 --> 00:32:12,200 OK. Listen to me. Listen to me. 577 00:32:14,720 --> 00:32:17,159 You don't know this, and perhaps you'll never know this 578 00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:21,759 and that is why you're so adorable. You are the sweetest, 579 00:32:21,760 --> 00:32:25,439 funniest person in any room. 580 00:32:25,440 --> 00:32:26,999 You on bad form is 581 00:32:27,000 --> 00:32:31,519 a level of charm that most people don't get to in their entire life. 582 00:32:31,520 --> 00:32:35,760 OK...OK. Thanks. 583 00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:40,119 You look lush. Where's he taking you? 584 00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:41,559 Oh. Italian restaurant. 585 00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:44,439 Can you believe this is the first date I've ever been on? 586 00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:45,879 Happy date-mitzvah. 587 00:32:45,880 --> 00:32:47,559 Oh, thanks, Nell. 588 00:32:47,560 --> 00:32:49,679 Do you know, I've got a belt that would look great 589 00:32:49,680 --> 00:32:51,599 with that dress, if you want to borrow it? 590 00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:55,239 You know, I'm just... I'm just going to go. 591 00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:56,920 Don't overthink it. Have fun. 592 00:32:59,800 --> 00:33:01,359 Oh, erm, I've washed your whites, 593 00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:03,159 they're hanging on the rack with mine. 594 00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:04,919 Do you still not know how to do your own laundry? 595 00:33:04,920 --> 00:33:06,039 Oh, leave her. 596 00:33:06,040 --> 00:33:08,119 She does a loads for me. And I like doing it. 597 00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:12,399 She likes doing it. You two are so co-dependent. 598 00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:13,600 Bye. 599 00:33:18,560 --> 00:33:20,759 I'm sorry, but I think it's very creepy for him 600 00:33:20,760 --> 00:33:23,159 to take her to a restaurant on their first date. 601 00:33:23,160 --> 00:33:25,159 And I don't think we should be going on first dates in 602 00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:26,559 the first month we move in together. 603 00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:31,119 This is meant to be cordoned off as sacred housemate bonding time. 604 00:33:31,120 --> 00:33:34,439 Erm, you went on a first date last week. 605 00:33:34,440 --> 00:33:37,119 Oh, Nell's in one of her rational Scottish moods. 606 00:33:37,120 --> 00:33:38,639 What are your plans tonight? 607 00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:41,319 Erm, don't know. What are you doing, date night? 608 00:33:41,320 --> 00:33:43,599 Yeah. Looking forward to it? 609 00:33:43,600 --> 00:33:45,519 I'm looking forward to tomorrow morning when it's done. 610 00:33:45,520 --> 00:33:47,479 You know? When you don't have to think about it for a while. 611 00:33:47,480 --> 00:33:49,999 Like putting out the bins. Where's Amara? 612 00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:52,159 She's out with some of her work lot, I think. 613 00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:53,519 Ah. See you in the morning. 614 00:33:53,520 --> 00:33:55,280 Have fun! 615 00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:43,440 Nathan? 616 00:34:44,600 --> 00:34:46,199 Birdy. 617 00:34:46,200 --> 00:34:47,799 Hello. 618 00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:49,679 Hey. Oh...! 619 00:34:49,680 --> 00:34:52,159 Sorry, I never know whether to do one or two. 620 00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:55,079 No, neither do I. I think I messed that up so, 621 00:34:55,080 --> 00:34:58,839 anyway, sit down. I'll get that for you. Thank you. 622 00:34:58,840 --> 00:35:00,519 You're welcome. 623 00:35:00,520 --> 00:35:01,960 Thank you. 624 00:35:24,600 --> 00:35:26,120 PHONE RINGS 625 00:35:29,400 --> 00:35:31,880 Hi, this is Street, I'm not here. Leave a message. 626 00:35:34,920 --> 00:35:36,360 SHE SIGHS 627 00:35:44,480 --> 00:35:46,280 MESSAGE ALERT 628 00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:52,480 Fuck it! 629 00:36:07,520 --> 00:36:12,759 # Oh, ee-oh, am I just about to lose my mind? 630 00:36:12,760 --> 00:36:15,919 # It was fun for five minutes 631 00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:19,759 # But I preferred it when I had less time 632 00:36:19,760 --> 00:36:23,120 # And I'm sick of sensation... # 633 00:36:37,680 --> 00:36:39,600 PHONE RINGS 634 00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:47,599 Hey. Hi. How are you? 635 00:36:47,600 --> 00:36:49,119 All good, what's up? 636 00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:52,999 Hmm, I just thought I'd drop in. I'm on a night out in East London. 637 00:36:53,000 --> 00:36:56,319 Oh, yeah, don't worry about that. 638 00:36:56,320 --> 00:36:57,639 What do you mean? 639 00:36:57,640 --> 00:37:01,039 I'm just kind of tied up, so don't worry about coming. 640 00:37:01,040 --> 00:37:04,159 Oh. I mean, you could come when everyone's gone. 641 00:37:04,160 --> 00:37:06,319 But I don't know when they'll be gone. 642 00:37:06,320 --> 00:37:08,239 Like, sometime after midnight, maybe? 643 00:37:08,240 --> 00:37:10,759 So...I'm your dial-a-pussy, now. 644 00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:13,159 Maggie, you called me. 645 00:37:13,160 --> 00:37:16,959 I don't know what kind of girl you think I am, Street. 646 00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:18,479 But I'm not 647 00:37:18,480 --> 00:37:20,599 going to feel grateful that some musician wants 648 00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:23,599 to booty-call me once his cool friends have left. 649 00:37:23,600 --> 00:37:24,999 Who, I can already tell, 650 00:37:25,000 --> 00:37:27,119 have some very dumb ideas about Neil Young. 651 00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:29,959 Who sings like an old... feeble...nan! Maggie... 652 00:37:29,960 --> 00:37:33,119 I'm not that kind of girl. So goodbye and fuck you! 653 00:37:33,120 --> 00:37:34,760 OK, baby. 654 00:37:55,200 --> 00:37:57,159 Oh, erm... 655 00:37:57,160 --> 00:37:59,359 Oh, no, no. Please, I'd love to. If you don't mind. 656 00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:01,879 No, no, I don't mind. 657 00:38:01,880 --> 00:38:04,919 Erm, that's really nice of you, thank you. 658 00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:08,080 You are welcome. It's my pleasure. Thank you. 659 00:38:09,720 --> 00:38:12,919 We could, erm, go to a bar if you fancy it, 660 00:38:12,920 --> 00:38:15,399 or...we could go back to mine for a drink. 661 00:38:15,400 --> 00:38:17,079 If that... If that's not too forward. 662 00:38:17,080 --> 00:38:20,279 Yeah. I...I've got leg day at 6am tomorrow. 663 00:38:20,280 --> 00:38:22,640 Oh. Yeah. 664 00:38:23,720 --> 00:38:27,279 Fuck it. Yeah, fuck it! Who needs legs?! 665 00:38:27,280 --> 00:38:29,599 Yeah, let's get legless! 666 00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:31,000 PHONE RINGS 667 00:38:32,760 --> 00:38:34,360 Don't worry about that. 668 00:38:36,000 --> 00:38:38,879 Leave me a message and I'll get back to you. Bye. 669 00:38:38,880 --> 00:38:42,959 Hey, Bird. Terrible evening. Erm, I got to the point where I'm telling 670 00:38:42,960 --> 00:38:45,479 a man what "kind of girl" I may or may not be, 671 00:38:45,480 --> 00:38:48,879 which, as we know, is a bad sign. 672 00:38:48,880 --> 00:38:51,879 Erm, if on the off-chance your date isn't going well, 673 00:38:51,880 --> 00:38:54,119 please come drink with me when you're done. 674 00:38:54,120 --> 00:38:56,680 Don't care how late it is. Love you. 675 00:39:02,080 --> 00:39:04,960 Hi, you're through to Birdy's phone. 676 00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:25,160 LOUD CHATTER 677 00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:49,000 DRESS RIPS Oh, fuck's sake! 678 00:40:17,960 --> 00:40:20,360 SMOOTH MUSIC STARTS 679 00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:07,199 WOMAN GIGGLES 680 00:41:07,200 --> 00:41:10,479 Birdy? Oh, fuck. Jesus Christ. 681 00:41:10,480 --> 00:41:12,599 Hi. 682 00:41:12,600 --> 00:41:14,839 What are you doing? I came in to say... 683 00:41:14,840 --> 00:41:17,079 Why do you have so many tiny towels?! 684 00:41:17,080 --> 00:41:19,280 They're not tiny towels, they're face cloths. 685 00:41:21,280 --> 00:41:23,759 I'm so sorry, I didn't realise. 686 00:41:23,760 --> 00:41:26,559 It's OK, it's OK. 687 00:41:26,560 --> 00:41:28,199 Date went well? 688 00:41:28,200 --> 00:41:29,599 Yeah. 689 00:41:29,600 --> 00:41:31,399 Sex? Sh. 690 00:41:31,400 --> 00:41:34,119 Finger bang? Blowie? I'll tell you tomorrow. 691 00:41:34,120 --> 00:41:35,559 Breakfast? 692 00:41:35,560 --> 00:41:39,280 We're actually going for brunch tomorrow, I think. OK, wow. 693 00:41:40,720 --> 00:41:44,719 Yeah. Yeah, this place by the canal he wants to take me to. 694 00:41:44,720 --> 00:41:47,039 Apparently, they do a really, really good Bloody Mary. 695 00:41:47,040 --> 00:41:49,879 No worries. Movie night tomorrow night? 696 00:41:49,880 --> 00:41:53,599 Yeah, yeah. Sure. Yeah. Are you OK? 697 00:41:53,600 --> 00:41:55,400 Do you guys want a drink? 698 00:41:57,600 --> 00:42:00,279 WHISPERS: I think I should probably... 699 00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:01,799 Of course. Of course. 700 00:42:01,800 --> 00:42:03,720 Night. Night. 701 00:42:07,960 --> 00:42:09,599 DOOR CLOSES 702 00:42:09,600 --> 00:42:11,280 BIRDY AND NATHAN GIGGLE 703 00:42:24,840 --> 00:42:28,360 # I got brass in pocket 704 00:42:29,400 --> 00:42:34,239 # I got bottle, I'm gonna use it 705 00:42:34,240 --> 00:42:38,439 # Intention, I feel inventive 706 00:42:38,440 --> 00:42:42,800 # Gonna make you, make you, make you notice 707 00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:47,680 # Got motion, restrained emotion 708 00:42:48,960 --> 00:42:53,559 # Been driving, Detroit leaning 709 00:42:53,560 --> 00:42:58,719 # No reason, just seems so pleasing 710 00:42:58,720 --> 00:43:02,520 # Gonna make you, make you, make you notice 711 00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:06,119 # Gonna use my arms 712 00:43:06,120 --> 00:43:08,319 # Gonna use my legs 713 00:43:08,320 --> 00:43:10,799 # Gonna use my style 714 00:43:10,800 --> 00:43:12,799 # Gonna use my sidestep 715 00:43:12,800 --> 00:43:14,439 # Gonna use my fingers... # 716 00:43:14,440 --> 00:43:16,640 All right, I'm coming. 717 00:43:21,560 --> 00:43:25,639 # Cos I'm gonna make you see 718 00:43:25,640 --> 00:43:29,560 # There's nobody else here No-one like me 719 00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:35,879 # I'm special, so special 720 00:43:35,880 --> 00:43:39,679 # I got have some of your attention 721 00:43:39,680 --> 00:43:41,640 # Give it to me... #