1 00:00:01,535 --> 00:00:03,301 Bon-jour tout le mond-e! 2 00:00:03,303 --> 00:00:04,636 Adult mark: French class. 3 00:00:04,672 --> 00:00:06,038 Bonjour, ma soeur rose. 4 00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:07,172 Adult mark: I hated it. 5 00:00:07,174 --> 00:00:08,507 Comment allez-vous? 6 00:00:08,642 --> 00:00:09,908 [class muttering replies] 7 00:00:09,910 --> 00:00:11,009 Adult mark: The newfoundland accent 8 00:00:11,045 --> 00:00:12,944 Was not meant to parlez-vous. 9 00:00:12,980 --> 00:00:18,250 Can anyone in this class form even one sentence in french? 10 00:00:18,252 --> 00:00:19,585 Mr. Critch? 11 00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:21,386 Adult mark: The only french words I knew 12 00:00:21,389 --> 00:00:23,489 Were the ones that meant the same in english. 13 00:00:23,624 --> 00:00:25,990 Je suis... 14 00:00:26,027 --> 00:00:28,793 Allé à la matinée... 15 00:00:30,664 --> 00:00:34,899 Avec... Ma fiancée... 16 00:00:34,935 --> 00:00:36,802 Encore! 17 00:00:36,871 --> 00:00:38,570 Adult mark: I barely knew any french 18 00:00:38,606 --> 00:00:40,472 But that was still more than my french teacher knew. 19 00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:41,739 Bien. 20 00:00:41,776 --> 00:00:43,942 Bi-en! 21 00:00:44,011 --> 00:00:45,611 Sister rose: Anyone else? 22 00:00:45,746 --> 00:00:48,747 [laughs] you're a brain, idiot. 23 00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:50,715 Adult mark: There was nothing more shameful at school 24 00:00:50,785 --> 00:00:52,417 Than being smart. 25 00:00:52,420 --> 00:00:56,087 You'll all have to do much better before our european trip! 26 00:00:56,123 --> 00:00:57,756 Adult mark: Each year, the grade eights travelled 27 00:00:57,891 --> 00:00:59,258 To europe for french immersion! 28 00:00:59,393 --> 00:01:01,025 Who didn't love France? 29 00:01:01,162 --> 00:01:03,428 France is a horrible place, children. 30 00:01:03,431 --> 00:01:06,298 Bicycles. Nude statues. 31 00:01:06,367 --> 00:01:09,367 The foul stench of wine and cheese 32 00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:12,704 Intermingling on the lips... 33 00:01:12,773 --> 00:01:14,573 As they... 34 00:01:14,642 --> 00:01:18,110 French kiss. 35 00:01:18,245 --> 00:01:22,647 That is why I expect you to behave the way jesus would have. 36 00:01:22,716 --> 00:01:24,783 Like north americans! 37 00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:27,519 Adult mark: I knew that the french would get moi. 38 00:01:27,654 --> 00:01:30,188 Romance, art, jerry lewis movies? 39 00:01:30,324 --> 00:01:32,257 I could reinvent myself there! 40 00:01:32,293 --> 00:01:35,793 And maybe impress fox with my "je ne sais quoi." 41 00:01:35,830 --> 00:01:39,731 [accordion music] 42 00:01:39,733 --> 00:01:42,067 Excusez-moi, madame? 43 00:01:42,069 --> 00:01:43,769 Est-ce que je vous connais? 44 00:01:43,771 --> 00:01:45,170 Croyez-vous en l'amour? 45 00:01:45,305 --> 00:01:47,506 L'amour? 46 00:01:47,641 --> 00:01:51,543 ♪ 47 00:01:51,579 --> 00:01:56,582 L'amour est aussi proche que mes lèvres. 48 00:01:56,584 --> 00:01:59,250 Hey, dumbass! 49 00:02:03,323 --> 00:02:04,490 Why is it so close? 50 00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:06,224 What? 51 00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:07,226 That can't be right. 52 00:02:07,361 --> 00:02:09,427 Luckily, we don't have to go to France, 53 00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:12,164 For France has come to us. 54 00:02:12,166 --> 00:02:13,499 Adult mark: St. Pierre and miquelon 55 00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:14,933 Is a tiny french island 56 00:02:15,068 --> 00:02:17,836 Just 19 kilometres off the coast of newfoundland. 57 00:02:17,838 --> 00:02:19,238 What a rip! That's not France. 58 00:02:19,373 --> 00:02:21,340 En français! 59 00:02:21,342 --> 00:02:23,241 Zut alors! Ca c'est de la merde! 60 00:02:23,310 --> 00:02:25,177 Adult mark: Fox was fluent in swearing, 61 00:02:25,179 --> 00:02:26,978 But sister rose hadn't heard those words 62 00:02:27,047 --> 00:02:28,246 In either language. 63 00:02:28,282 --> 00:02:29,981 Excellent, fox. 64 00:02:30,017 --> 00:02:33,652 When England won the seven years' war in 1763, 65 00:02:33,721 --> 00:02:35,320 They got newfoundland, 66 00:02:35,356 --> 00:02:39,057 And France got these two tiny islands. 67 00:02:39,126 --> 00:02:42,460 So we are going to France. 68 00:02:42,462 --> 00:02:43,661 Technically. 69 00:02:43,697 --> 00:02:46,398 Adult mark: No eiffel tower, no louvre. 70 00:02:46,533 --> 00:02:48,266 My dreams were "fini." 71 00:02:48,335 --> 00:02:50,068 It's three friggin' hours on a bus! 72 00:02:50,204 --> 00:02:51,603 You better sit with me. 73 00:02:51,738 --> 00:02:53,672 Adult mark: Well, then again... 74 00:02:53,674 --> 00:02:55,507 I don't want to be stuck with some loser. 75 00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:56,641 Adult mark: Impossible! 76 00:02:56,677 --> 00:02:59,411 N'est pas français. 77 00:02:59,413 --> 00:03:02,013 ♪ 78 00:03:02,148 --> 00:03:03,448 Please, can I go? 79 00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:05,250 I don't know, mark, it's awful far. 80 00:03:05,385 --> 00:03:07,219 Almost four-hour drive with the ferry. 81 00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:08,754 Pop: Well... 82 00:03:08,889 --> 00:03:10,956 I suppose I could chaperone, you know? 83 00:03:11,091 --> 00:03:13,091 I haven't been abroad before. 84 00:03:13,093 --> 00:03:15,060 You had your chance with two world wars. 85 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:16,828 Weren't too concerned about seeing France back then, 86 00:03:16,964 --> 00:03:17,729 Were ya? 87 00:03:17,731 --> 00:03:20,198 Colour-blind. 88 00:03:20,234 --> 00:03:22,367 I think it could be lovely for him to see the world 89 00:03:22,369 --> 00:03:23,635 Before he dies. 90 00:03:23,671 --> 00:03:26,337 Whoa, who said anything about dying here?! 91 00:03:26,373 --> 00:03:27,839 I-I guess I could ask? 92 00:03:27,841 --> 00:03:29,374 Hey, excellent. Heh! 93 00:03:29,410 --> 00:03:31,175 Now, just leave a little room 94 00:03:31,212 --> 00:03:33,512 In your suitcase for duty-free. 95 00:03:33,647 --> 00:03:36,314 Hm? Hm. 96 00:03:36,450 --> 00:03:38,283 So...? 97 00:03:38,352 --> 00:03:39,517 Alright. 98 00:03:39,553 --> 00:03:40,985 [exhales] yes! 99 00:03:43,590 --> 00:03:45,090 -Mike? -Mm-hm? 100 00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:46,324 I had a thought. 101 00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:47,925 Mm-hm? 102 00:03:47,962 --> 00:03:49,994 With mark and pop gone to europe... 103 00:03:50,030 --> 00:03:51,195 Oh, yeah. 104 00:03:51,232 --> 00:03:52,530 And mike jr. At work... 105 00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:53,799 Yes, yeah... 106 00:03:53,934 --> 00:03:55,934 We're gonna have the house all to ourselves... 107 00:03:55,936 --> 00:03:57,368 Mm-hm. 108 00:03:57,404 --> 00:03:59,537 Mary: All alone... 109 00:03:59,607 --> 00:04:02,874 For the first time in seventeen years. 110 00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:09,214 We could get to bed a little bit early. 111 00:04:09,349 --> 00:04:11,716 I could use the sleep! 112 00:04:17,023 --> 00:04:18,890 Windows stay closed. 113 00:04:18,959 --> 00:04:21,493 No unscheduled bathroom breaks. 114 00:04:21,628 --> 00:04:26,498 Like moses and the red sea, this aisle will remain parted. 115 00:04:26,500 --> 00:04:28,232 Those are the rules! 116 00:04:28,269 --> 00:04:30,568 Excuse me, sister... 117 00:04:30,570 --> 00:04:34,272 Do you mind if I just squeeze past your arse? 118 00:04:36,310 --> 00:04:38,976 Boys and girls! 119 00:04:39,013 --> 00:04:43,648 [rock music] 120 00:04:43,684 --> 00:04:45,984 Bonjour, mes amis! 121 00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:47,719 Woo! Next stop europe! 122 00:04:47,854 --> 00:04:49,120 Excited? 123 00:04:49,156 --> 00:04:51,189 It's not real France. It's just a knock-off. 124 00:04:51,191 --> 00:04:52,724 Oh, come on! 125 00:04:52,859 --> 00:04:56,495 Where's your sense of adventure, little miss red, huh? 126 00:04:56,497 --> 00:04:59,197 Do you know what st. Pierre is famous for? 127 00:04:59,199 --> 00:05:00,632 Sucking? 128 00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:01,867 No. 129 00:05:01,869 --> 00:05:03,201 Rum running! 130 00:05:03,336 --> 00:05:04,836 Prohibition! 131 00:05:04,872 --> 00:05:09,341 See, booze used to be illegal then, like drugs are today. 132 00:05:09,343 --> 00:05:12,544 Oh no, st. Pierre was a bootlegger's dream! 133 00:05:12,546 --> 00:05:14,980 Now, quiz! 134 00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:17,683 Who knows who al capone is? 135 00:05:17,818 --> 00:05:18,950 The gangster? 136 00:05:18,952 --> 00:05:20,118 Yeah! 137 00:05:20,254 --> 00:05:22,220 He's robert deniro! From the untouchables! 138 00:05:22,289 --> 00:05:23,955 -Oh, yeah! -Will you two shut it? 139 00:05:23,991 --> 00:05:25,791 Go ahead, old man. 140 00:05:25,793 --> 00:05:27,525 I mean, mr. Critch. 141 00:05:27,527 --> 00:05:30,829 Hm, well, he needed illegal booze 142 00:05:30,898 --> 00:05:32,097 For his night clubs, 143 00:05:32,232 --> 00:05:35,300 So he had 80 boats sneaking 144 00:05:35,435 --> 00:05:39,637 300,000 cases a month from st. Pierre to newfoundland, 145 00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:42,707 And then they'd smuggle them across the border to the states. 146 00:05:42,710 --> 00:05:45,410 He got so rich he built a church 147 00:05:45,545 --> 00:05:48,113 Just so that everyone would look the other way. 148 00:05:48,182 --> 00:05:49,714 Okay. That's pretty bad-ass! 149 00:05:49,750 --> 00:05:50,849 Oh, yeah. 150 00:05:50,851 --> 00:05:52,183 Can we go see the church? 151 00:05:52,219 --> 00:05:54,419 Sure, sister rose would love that! 152 00:05:54,421 --> 00:05:56,454 Adult mark: I was beginning to doubt pop's reasons 153 00:05:56,490 --> 00:05:57,589 For coming. 154 00:05:57,658 --> 00:05:59,224 How do you know so much about it? 155 00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:02,694 I won't have you filling their heads with legends and lies. 156 00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:05,396 And I don't know what possessed you to sign on as a chaperone, 157 00:06:05,432 --> 00:06:07,865 But I know that you could only be possessed by the devil. 158 00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:10,268 Just clear the aisle, sister. 159 00:06:10,337 --> 00:06:12,203 Those are the rules. 160 00:06:12,239 --> 00:06:15,941 Adult mark: This was going to be a long trip. 161 00:06:16,076 --> 00:06:19,678 [accordion music] 162 00:06:19,680 --> 00:06:22,748 ♪ 163 00:06:22,883 --> 00:06:26,284 ♪ 164 00:06:26,420 --> 00:06:28,754 ♪ 165 00:06:28,889 --> 00:06:29,888 Adult mark: France! 166 00:06:29,957 --> 00:06:32,090 Words escaped me. 167 00:06:32,092 --> 00:06:34,960 Mostly because I wasn't good at french. 168 00:06:34,962 --> 00:06:36,828 Did we drive in a circle? 169 00:06:36,864 --> 00:06:38,563 This place looks just like home. 170 00:06:38,632 --> 00:06:40,365 This sucks. 171 00:06:40,367 --> 00:06:42,968 Adult mark: I thought fox would fall in love with France, 172 00:06:43,103 --> 00:06:45,904 And me, but I guess some things just don't translate. 173 00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:47,038 [sister rose claps] 174 00:06:47,174 --> 00:06:50,208 Écou-tez, l'enfants! 175 00:06:50,244 --> 00:06:53,645 Main-tenant, le français sale-ment! 176 00:06:53,714 --> 00:06:56,548 Adult mark: French immersion became submersion 177 00:06:56,683 --> 00:06:58,583 As sister rose drowned in the foreign tongue. 178 00:06:58,585 --> 00:07:00,585 L'enfants! Le museum! 179 00:07:00,587 --> 00:07:03,321 Allez-vous, toute-lemonds! 180 00:07:03,390 --> 00:07:05,523 Oh my lord. 181 00:07:05,592 --> 00:07:09,794 I never realized you had such a potty mouth. 182 00:07:09,797 --> 00:07:13,532 [rock music sting] 183 00:07:19,973 --> 00:07:22,340 Madame? 184 00:07:22,342 --> 00:07:25,343 Avec moi? 185 00:07:25,345 --> 00:07:27,545 The only thing that sucks more than your french 186 00:07:27,681 --> 00:07:28,546 Is this trip. 187 00:07:28,582 --> 00:07:31,382 [seagull cawing] 188 00:07:31,452 --> 00:07:32,584 Exotic. 189 00:07:32,653 --> 00:07:33,818 Oh, no. 190 00:07:33,821 --> 00:07:34,752 No-- 191 00:07:38,859 --> 00:07:40,025 Mary? 192 00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:41,893 Who broke the table? 193 00:07:41,929 --> 00:07:44,696 It's just the two of us tonight, so I took the leaf out. 194 00:07:44,698 --> 00:07:46,764 Hm? 195 00:07:46,834 --> 00:07:50,835 [romantic music with spanish guitar] 196 00:07:50,838 --> 00:07:52,103 What's this? 197 00:07:52,172 --> 00:07:53,338 French onion soup. 198 00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:55,373 Alice lent me the bowls. 199 00:07:55,375 --> 00:07:56,975 I figured everybody else was in France, 200 00:07:57,044 --> 00:07:58,743 So we should be too. 201 00:07:58,879 --> 00:08:00,979 Onion soup? I-I don't like onions. 202 00:08:01,048 --> 00:08:03,314 There aren't any onions in it, silly! 203 00:08:03,383 --> 00:08:06,384 It's just hot water and french onion soup mix! 204 00:08:06,453 --> 00:08:08,252 What's all this, then? 205 00:08:08,288 --> 00:08:10,922 Swiss cheese. 206 00:08:10,958 --> 00:08:12,724 Swiss, french! 207 00:08:12,726 --> 00:08:15,260 I need a passport just to eat my supper! 208 00:08:15,329 --> 00:08:16,862 Is there any turkey left? 209 00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:18,930 You couldn't get laid out of a chicken's arse, ya know that? 210 00:08:19,065 --> 00:08:20,398 Good god! 211 00:08:20,534 --> 00:08:22,334 I'm trying to be romantic, ya arsehole! 212 00:08:22,336 --> 00:08:23,802 When do we ever really talk? 213 00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:25,270 All you ever do is talk! 214 00:08:25,339 --> 00:08:27,038 Oh, and you never listen! 215 00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:27,806 [phone rings] 216 00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:29,541 I'll get it! 217 00:08:32,179 --> 00:08:34,211 You couldn't get laid in a cage full'a monkeys 218 00:08:34,248 --> 00:08:36,314 With a fist full'a bananas! 219 00:08:40,521 --> 00:08:41,753 Hello? 220 00:08:41,755 --> 00:08:43,555 Operator: You have a collect call from... 221 00:08:43,557 --> 00:08:45,523 [rapidly] hey dad, it's me mark and everything's okay 222 00:08:45,658 --> 00:08:48,293 But a bird pooped on me but that's good luck, bye! 223 00:08:48,362 --> 00:08:49,627 Adult mark: Why pay long distance 224 00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:51,562 When you could jam all you had to say 225 00:08:51,598 --> 00:08:53,197 Into the space for the caller's name? 226 00:08:53,267 --> 00:08:54,666 Operator: Will you accept the charges? 227 00:08:54,801 --> 00:08:56,167 God, no. 228 00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:59,503 Adult mark: It was like an audio postcard. 229 00:08:59,540 --> 00:09:01,873 Oh, that was mark. He's fine. 230 00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:04,308 Good. 231 00:09:04,344 --> 00:09:05,944 No more interruptions. 232 00:09:05,946 --> 00:09:07,912 You're gonna have a romantic night tonight 233 00:09:07,948 --> 00:09:10,214 If it friggin' kills ya! 234 00:09:10,284 --> 00:09:12,350 [dial tone] 235 00:09:12,485 --> 00:09:13,451 Phone's off the hook. 236 00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:14,786 I know. 237 00:09:14,855 --> 00:09:16,521 You know, dad... 238 00:09:16,523 --> 00:09:17,989 A woman needs to be romanced. 239 00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:19,857 Will you get out of it! 240 00:09:26,366 --> 00:09:28,333 Les îles saint-pierre et miquelon étaient une plaque 241 00:09:28,402 --> 00:09:33,071 Tournante pour la contrebande d'alcool vers les états-unis. 242 00:09:33,073 --> 00:09:34,405 -What's she saying? -Shh! 243 00:09:34,441 --> 00:09:37,342 Des criminels notoires s'y sont installés, 244 00:09:37,411 --> 00:09:41,145 Notamment al capone. 245 00:09:41,214 --> 00:09:42,814 She just said "al capone"! 246 00:09:42,883 --> 00:09:44,349 Your pop was right! 247 00:09:44,484 --> 00:09:46,017 Ah, yes! Good ear. 248 00:09:46,152 --> 00:09:47,485 Joyeux noël! 249 00:09:47,621 --> 00:09:49,020 Y a-t-il des questions? 250 00:09:49,155 --> 00:09:50,321 Madame? 251 00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:51,489 Oui, madame? 252 00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:54,225 Qu'est-ce que c'est? 253 00:09:54,361 --> 00:09:57,695 Une guillotine. 254 00:09:57,831 --> 00:09:58,730 Ça gère! 255 00:09:58,865 --> 00:09:59,930 Oui, tres bien! 256 00:09:59,967 --> 00:10:00,899 Brain! 257 00:10:01,034 --> 00:10:01,899 What a loser! 258 00:10:01,969 --> 00:10:03,434 Silence! 259 00:10:03,470 --> 00:10:06,905 As you can see, my students speak french fluently. 260 00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:10,975 If you like, you could practice your english for a bit? 261 00:10:10,978 --> 00:10:13,077 [heavily accented] uh... My english? 262 00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:16,213 Uh, yes, I speak english very well. 263 00:10:24,124 --> 00:10:28,994 [mysterious music] 264 00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:31,996 Al capone's hat. 265 00:10:32,032 --> 00:10:34,999 Huh. 266 00:10:35,035 --> 00:10:37,869 Is that so? 267 00:10:38,004 --> 00:10:41,606 [mysterious music continues] 268 00:10:41,675 --> 00:10:45,276 ♪ 269 00:10:45,345 --> 00:10:48,880 ♪ 270 00:10:48,949 --> 00:10:52,283 If the nun can frig off, so can we. 271 00:10:52,352 --> 00:10:54,152 Excusez-moi? 272 00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:55,653 Vous allez ou? 273 00:10:55,656 --> 00:10:59,457 Sorry. No speak-ez le french-ez. 274 00:11:07,701 --> 00:11:09,633 Adult mark: Pop was up to no good, 275 00:11:09,670 --> 00:11:13,104 But this was my chance to show fox my sophisticated side. 276 00:11:13,239 --> 00:11:16,974 ♪ 277 00:11:17,044 --> 00:11:20,045 ♪ 278 00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:23,781 ♪ 279 00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:29,320 [in a whisper] patrick? 280 00:11:32,392 --> 00:11:34,525 Patrick? 281 00:11:36,596 --> 00:11:37,595 Rosy! 282 00:11:37,664 --> 00:11:38,730 Aah! Jesus! 283 00:11:38,865 --> 00:11:41,499 Shh, they'll hear you, for goodness sake. 284 00:11:41,634 --> 00:11:43,868 Besides, we're in a house of worship. 285 00:11:43,937 --> 00:11:46,271 It's a little late for you to find god, isn't it? 286 00:11:46,406 --> 00:11:48,639 Somebody must be looking down on me. 287 00:11:48,709 --> 00:11:50,408 They brought me to you, didn't they? 288 00:11:50,410 --> 00:11:52,409 Oh, don't start! 289 00:11:52,446 --> 00:11:54,545 Tell me the real reason you're here. 290 00:11:57,718 --> 00:11:59,884 [sighs] 291 00:11:59,920 --> 00:12:05,423 [mysterious music] 292 00:12:05,425 --> 00:12:07,091 Fine. 293 00:12:07,094 --> 00:12:09,193 [sighs] 294 00:12:11,865 --> 00:12:14,232 So, it was 1925. 295 00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:18,169 You had just broken my heart, so I came to st. Pierre, 296 00:12:18,304 --> 00:12:22,173 Where I'd heard that this capone fella needed some guys 297 00:12:22,308 --> 00:12:25,243 To row rum out to the schooners 298 00:12:25,312 --> 00:12:27,779 Where the coast guard couldn't find 'em. 299 00:12:27,781 --> 00:12:30,948 They were paying a fortune, 50 cents a gallon. 300 00:12:30,950 --> 00:12:32,584 I'd never seen money like that. 301 00:12:32,586 --> 00:12:34,852 I've never been good with temptation. 302 00:12:34,888 --> 00:12:40,325 ♪ 303 00:12:40,460 --> 00:12:43,061 Well... 304 00:12:43,196 --> 00:12:46,464 Are you coming to hear the rest of my confession? 305 00:12:50,003 --> 00:12:52,203 [chuckles] 306 00:12:53,373 --> 00:12:56,007 [laughter] 307 00:12:58,344 --> 00:13:01,078 Où est votre professeur? 308 00:13:01,114 --> 00:13:03,080 Uh... 309 00:13:03,116 --> 00:13:06,050 What's the french word for "chaperone"? 310 00:13:12,259 --> 00:13:13,358 Voilà! 311 00:13:13,493 --> 00:13:14,692 Real french cheese. 312 00:13:14,828 --> 00:13:16,227 Ha-ha! 313 00:13:18,331 --> 00:13:20,164 You know, their cheese doesn't come in slices. 314 00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:21,366 No? 315 00:13:21,501 --> 00:13:23,634 Uh, jars of whiz, then? 316 00:13:23,703 --> 00:13:25,236 They have all kinds. 317 00:13:25,371 --> 00:13:29,107 Camembert, brie, and my favourite... 318 00:13:29,109 --> 00:13:31,376 Bleu! 319 00:13:31,511 --> 00:13:33,978 Ugh, that stuff reeks. 320 00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:35,412 You really had it before? 321 00:13:35,448 --> 00:13:37,448 Le fromage bleu? 322 00:13:37,517 --> 00:13:39,116 All the time! 323 00:13:39,152 --> 00:13:41,919 I have it with a cream cracker with a cup of tea at bed time. 324 00:13:41,988 --> 00:13:43,654 Goes down smooth. 325 00:13:50,196 --> 00:13:51,329 Uh... 326 00:13:51,398 --> 00:13:54,399 I think it's a little off. 327 00:13:54,534 --> 00:13:56,600 It's supposed to be rotten, dumbass. 328 00:13:56,636 --> 00:13:59,136 But you knew that, right? 329 00:13:59,138 --> 00:14:00,638 Yeah. 330 00:14:00,674 --> 00:14:02,607 I prefer mine more off. 331 00:14:02,742 --> 00:14:05,243 Mm-hm. 332 00:14:05,245 --> 00:14:06,543 Take another bite. 333 00:14:07,947 --> 00:14:09,213 Yeah? 334 00:14:09,216 --> 00:14:10,148 Yeah. 335 00:14:10,283 --> 00:14:11,482 Yeah! 336 00:14:14,487 --> 00:14:17,021 Yeah... [retching] 337 00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:31,302 Oh, for the love of god, mike, 338 00:14:31,437 --> 00:14:33,371 I will shove that radio up your arse 339 00:14:33,373 --> 00:14:35,439 And that'll be the only action you get. 340 00:14:35,508 --> 00:14:37,375 Mike jr: [on radio] and later on, we'll have 341 00:14:37,444 --> 00:14:39,243 Nightline with ron pumphrey, but first... 342 00:14:39,246 --> 00:14:40,979 A request! 343 00:14:41,114 --> 00:14:43,514 Listening to our son is a bit of a mood-killer, there, casanova! 344 00:14:43,516 --> 00:14:45,083 Mike jr: This is mike critch jr., 345 00:14:45,218 --> 00:14:48,186 And this one goes out to mom, from dad... 346 00:14:48,321 --> 00:14:50,121 Which is kind of gross. 347 00:14:50,256 --> 00:14:54,125 Here's the fureys, with "when you were sweet sixteen." 348 00:14:54,127 --> 00:14:56,027 Oh... 349 00:14:56,096 --> 00:14:58,796 ♪ ...As I've never loved before ♪ 350 00:14:58,798 --> 00:15:00,597 [mary chuckles softly] 351 00:15:02,435 --> 00:15:06,870 ♪ since first I saw you on the village... ♪ 352 00:15:06,907 --> 00:15:10,874 Oh, mike! 353 00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:13,144 I guess I'm just out of practice. 354 00:15:13,146 --> 00:15:14,812 Can't blame me for being nervous 355 00:15:14,948 --> 00:15:16,280 Around the prettiest girl that I've-- 356 00:15:16,283 --> 00:15:18,015 Ah! 357 00:15:18,084 --> 00:15:20,151 Shut up and help me move the beds together. 358 00:15:20,286 --> 00:15:25,756 ♪ I love you as I loved you, 359 00:15:25,792 --> 00:15:29,627 When you were sweet sixteen... ♪ 360 00:15:29,629 --> 00:15:32,630 Adult mark: We were whatever the french word for "lost" was. 361 00:15:32,632 --> 00:15:35,566 Uh, I think it's this way. 362 00:15:35,702 --> 00:15:37,168 Blaireau! Arrête! 363 00:15:37,237 --> 00:15:38,802 Adult mark: French bullies! 364 00:15:38,838 --> 00:15:41,406 Like the fox brothers, but with wine and smokes. 365 00:15:41,541 --> 00:15:43,374 Bonjour, mes amis. 366 00:15:43,410 --> 00:15:46,477 Du fromage... Bleu? 367 00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:49,213 Tu parles français comme une vache espagnole! 368 00:15:49,215 --> 00:15:52,150 Ah, oui, oui. Moi, aussi. 369 00:15:52,152 --> 00:15:53,751 T'es un vrai sans-couilles! 370 00:15:53,820 --> 00:15:55,753 Va te faire cuire un oeuf, pompe à chiasse! 371 00:15:55,888 --> 00:15:57,588 Casse-toi donc, branleur! 372 00:15:57,590 --> 00:15:59,624 Adult mark: When it came to french curse words, 373 00:15:59,626 --> 00:16:03,361 Fox wasn't a brain, she was a genius! 374 00:16:03,496 --> 00:16:07,264 Ca m'est égal, espèce de plouc! 375 00:16:07,266 --> 00:16:09,400 I was just about to say the same thing. 376 00:16:09,469 --> 00:16:10,934 Here. 377 00:16:13,606 --> 00:16:16,674 You must think I'm whatever the french word for an idiot is. 378 00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:18,008 [french pronunciation] idiot. 379 00:16:18,044 --> 00:16:20,011 No. 380 00:16:20,013 --> 00:16:21,979 You were actually pretty cute. 381 00:16:24,818 --> 00:16:29,620 So, can you just admit you can read the street signs now? 382 00:16:29,622 --> 00:16:31,922 [sighs] it's this way. 383 00:16:35,228 --> 00:16:37,762 Uh, what's a "branleur"? 384 00:16:37,831 --> 00:16:39,964 You're not old enough to know. 385 00:16:40,099 --> 00:16:42,967 -Sorry, come on. -Oh... 386 00:16:46,339 --> 00:16:49,073 Ritche: Ah! Yes, here it is! 387 00:16:49,208 --> 00:16:50,842 "abandonné." 388 00:16:50,844 --> 00:16:52,843 Nous sommes... 389 00:16:52,879 --> 00:16:55,379 Abandonnés! 390 00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:56,981 Brain! 391 00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:02,286 Ah, hurry up! 392 00:17:02,422 --> 00:17:05,856 Oh, god, this was so much easier the first time around. 393 00:17:05,925 --> 00:17:09,026 Well, what's down there that's so damn important? 394 00:17:09,029 --> 00:17:11,862 Pop: A few bottles in my load kind of got... 395 00:17:11,931 --> 00:17:14,331 Went missing. 396 00:17:14,401 --> 00:17:17,868 Well, they came looking for me, but you know, 397 00:17:17,937 --> 00:17:21,172 You really don't want to be crossing al capone. 398 00:17:21,241 --> 00:17:24,775 ♪ 399 00:17:24,778 --> 00:17:28,479 ♪ 400 00:17:28,481 --> 00:17:30,514 Find him! 401 00:17:30,583 --> 00:17:32,617 Pop: I left something in this church. 402 00:17:32,619 --> 00:17:36,086 I just wanted to see whether it was still there. 403 00:17:36,122 --> 00:17:37,421 Aah! 404 00:17:37,424 --> 00:17:39,490 Yes! 405 00:17:39,625 --> 00:17:40,691 Oh! [chuckles] 406 00:17:40,760 --> 00:17:43,160 They'd kill me if they came back here! 407 00:17:43,296 --> 00:17:44,428 But thank god they're all dead. 408 00:17:44,464 --> 00:17:46,230 So screw 'em. 409 00:17:46,266 --> 00:17:48,499 Now... 410 00:17:48,634 --> 00:17:50,701 What do you know? 411 00:17:50,837 --> 00:17:53,971 [cackling excitedly] 412 00:17:53,973 --> 00:17:55,072 Someone will hear! 413 00:17:55,207 --> 00:17:56,440 [loud crash] aah! 414 00:17:56,476 --> 00:17:57,975 Oh, jesus! 415 00:17:58,044 --> 00:17:59,376 No, no! 416 00:17:59,446 --> 00:18:01,512 Good god... 417 00:18:01,647 --> 00:18:02,647 Oh! 418 00:18:02,649 --> 00:18:04,381 Rats' piss! 419 00:18:04,383 --> 00:18:06,050 -They've eaten the money! -[distant voices] 420 00:18:06,185 --> 00:18:08,920 My god, don't you people ever clean these churches? 421 00:18:09,055 --> 00:18:09,954 Someone's coming! 422 00:18:09,956 --> 00:18:11,122 Alright, alright, alright. 423 00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:12,990 There was one more little thing. 424 00:18:13,126 --> 00:18:14,925 Leave it, you old fool! 425 00:18:14,994 --> 00:18:16,793 Oh-ho! 426 00:18:16,830 --> 00:18:18,329 Well! 427 00:18:18,331 --> 00:18:20,398 Welcome, my old beauty! 428 00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:21,599 Look at that! 429 00:18:21,668 --> 00:18:23,000 Voice: Où êtes vous? 430 00:18:23,002 --> 00:18:25,002 Aah! Patrick, come on! 431 00:18:25,071 --> 00:18:27,071 Hey! Ay, ay, ay... 432 00:18:27,140 --> 00:18:30,074 [both laughing] 433 00:18:36,749 --> 00:18:39,016 Why do you pretend you're not smart? 434 00:18:39,152 --> 00:18:40,885 I mean, if I knew french like that-- 435 00:18:40,887 --> 00:18:42,753 Every year, I get a new teacher, 436 00:18:42,822 --> 00:18:45,489 And the first thing they say is, "I taught your brothers." 437 00:18:45,492 --> 00:18:47,892 From then on, I'm stupid or I'm trouble. 438 00:18:48,027 --> 00:18:50,561 If I do well, they say I cheated, so... 439 00:18:50,630 --> 00:18:52,496 Why bother? 440 00:18:52,565 --> 00:18:54,031 That's not fair. 441 00:18:54,067 --> 00:18:56,834 You shouldn't hide who you are. 442 00:18:56,836 --> 00:18:58,435 Look who's talking. 443 00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:01,104 I'm being serious. 444 00:19:01,141 --> 00:19:03,574 You're not your brothers. You're really special. 445 00:19:08,681 --> 00:19:11,515 [laughs nervously] what's-- what's that over there? 446 00:19:14,687 --> 00:19:15,853 That's newfoundland! 447 00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:17,321 Cool! 448 00:19:17,323 --> 00:19:18,923 It's pretty. 449 00:19:18,925 --> 00:19:22,193 From a distance. 450 00:19:22,195 --> 00:19:25,129 It's beautiful. 451 00:19:25,198 --> 00:19:28,732 Thought you said France was better. 452 00:19:28,768 --> 00:19:30,935 Sometimes you have to be away from something for a while 453 00:19:31,004 --> 00:19:33,137 To realize how special it really is. 454 00:19:33,206 --> 00:19:36,874 [soft, emotional music] 455 00:19:37,009 --> 00:19:40,011 ♪ 456 00:19:40,146 --> 00:19:43,614 Uh, France have the poodle, 457 00:19:43,749 --> 00:19:47,485 But we have the newfoundland dog and the labrador retriever. 458 00:19:47,487 --> 00:19:50,754 We even have our own time zone, and... 459 00:19:50,790 --> 00:19:54,825 Oh, uh, we should get going. 460 00:19:54,894 --> 00:19:57,962 ♪ 461 00:19:58,031 --> 00:20:02,032 ♪ 462 00:20:04,804 --> 00:20:06,837 ♪ 463 00:20:06,906 --> 00:20:09,240 Pop: That guide... My god. 464 00:20:09,375 --> 00:20:11,242 I didn't understand a word she was saying! 465 00:20:11,244 --> 00:20:13,110 [gasps] 466 00:20:13,179 --> 00:20:14,778 You don't speak french, do you? 467 00:20:14,847 --> 00:20:18,382 [laughs] [uncorks bottle] 468 00:20:18,418 --> 00:20:20,117 Woo-hoo-hoo! 469 00:20:20,186 --> 00:20:22,386 Oh, shh! 470 00:20:22,388 --> 00:20:24,922 Mmm. 471 00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:27,858 Mmm... 472 00:20:27,927 --> 00:20:29,927 -Mmm... Ooh! -Oh my god! 473 00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:32,863 Oh my... 474 00:20:32,899 --> 00:20:35,198 Oh... Ooh! 475 00:20:35,235 --> 00:20:36,333 Yeah? 476 00:20:36,402 --> 00:20:38,269 You know... 477 00:20:38,338 --> 00:20:41,539 There are a lot of things that don't get better with age, 478 00:20:41,541 --> 00:20:44,742 But you, my dear, do. 479 00:20:44,877 --> 00:20:47,344 Adult mark: Sometimes you have to be away from something 480 00:20:47,380 --> 00:20:49,480 To realize just how special it is. 481 00:20:49,549 --> 00:20:51,949 Because it's all too easy to take the things we love 482 00:20:51,951 --> 00:20:53,084 For granted. 483 00:20:53,219 --> 00:20:55,019 Mike jr: [on radio] and now, the weather! 484 00:20:55,021 --> 00:20:56,954 Tomorrow until Tuesday, we can expect light showers 485 00:20:57,023 --> 00:20:58,289 On the avalon, followed by-- 486 00:20:58,291 --> 00:20:59,823 Change the station, will ya? 487 00:20:59,892 --> 00:21:01,292 Mike jr: [on radio] ...And drizzle. 488 00:21:01,427 --> 00:21:02,159 Headin' into the weekend-- 489 00:21:02,295 --> 00:21:03,294 Woo! 490 00:21:03,363 --> 00:21:04,829 Sacred heart, my back! 491 00:21:04,964 --> 00:21:06,230 Aah! 492 00:21:06,299 --> 00:21:08,231 Adult mark: If you can find someone to love you 493 00:21:08,268 --> 00:21:09,700 For who you really are... 494 00:21:09,702 --> 00:21:13,537 Well, that's what the french call "l'amour vrai." 495 00:21:13,539 --> 00:21:15,773 True love. 496 00:21:15,775 --> 00:21:19,176 ♪ 497 00:21:23,449 --> 00:21:27,785 ♪ 498 00:21:27,787 --> 00:21:31,989 ♪ 499 00:21:32,124 --> 00:21:36,527 ♪ 500 00:21:36,596 --> 00:21:40,263 ♪ 501 00:21:40,300 --> 00:21:45,336 ♪ 502 00:21:45,471 --> 00:21:48,939 ♪ 503 00:21:49,008 --> 00:21:51,275 ♪