1 00:00:01,635 --> 00:00:02,434 [alarm clock rings] 2 00:00:05,706 --> 00:00:08,907 Adult mark (v.O.): Every morning started with a stand-off. 3 00:00:08,943 --> 00:00:11,543 ♪ 4 00:00:11,579 --> 00:00:15,013 Pop's bladder was like a leaky faucet. 5 00:00:15,049 --> 00:00:18,217 -Don't you dare. 6 00:00:18,219 --> 00:00:19,718 -I'll only be a minute. 7 00:00:19,853 --> 00:00:20,952 -I'm 80. 8 00:00:21,022 --> 00:00:22,988 I might not have a minute! 9 00:00:22,990 --> 00:00:25,357 Adult mark (v.O.): I, too, had the bladder of an 80-year-old 10 00:00:25,492 --> 00:00:28,326 But luckily, I had the legs of a man in his 40s. 11 00:00:28,396 --> 00:00:30,596 -I'm sorry it came to this. 12 00:00:30,731 --> 00:00:31,630 [western film music] 13 00:00:31,765 --> 00:00:33,532 Pop: Hey! 14 00:00:33,601 --> 00:00:37,269 -Oh, yeah... -No, hey, hey! 15 00:00:37,338 --> 00:00:38,336 -[knocks on door] 16 00:00:38,372 --> 00:00:40,338 This is an emergency! 17 00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:41,473 -What's all the racket? 18 00:00:41,608 --> 00:00:43,008 -Mike stole the bathroom! 19 00:00:43,077 --> 00:00:45,611 -I'm not above using the kitchen sink. 20 00:00:45,746 --> 00:00:46,678 -[pounds on door] 21 00:00:46,714 --> 00:00:48,447 Get out of it! 22 00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:53,251 Mark: Hey! 23 00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:54,953 -Toilet's not flushing. -What? 24 00:00:55,089 --> 00:00:56,588 Did you jiggle the handle? 25 00:00:56,723 --> 00:00:58,156 -Yeah, 'course. 26 00:00:58,192 --> 00:01:01,660 -Then what's he doing in there? 27 00:01:01,662 --> 00:01:03,228 -Hm. 28 00:01:03,264 --> 00:01:04,430 Toilet's busted. 29 00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:07,966 -Then why'd you go? -Oh, why don't you go? 30 00:01:07,968 --> 00:01:09,968 -Oh, no, ya don't! 31 00:01:10,037 --> 00:01:11,636 I've gotta have a look. 32 00:01:11,705 --> 00:01:12,704 -No! 33 00:01:12,773 --> 00:01:13,905 I need to go! 34 00:01:13,974 --> 00:01:17,242 -I just gotta jiggle the handle. 35 00:01:17,278 --> 00:01:18,911 Well, that's strange. 36 00:01:18,913 --> 00:01:20,178 -Did you break the toilet? 37 00:01:20,214 --> 00:01:21,980 -No, I didn't break it. I'm fixing it! 38 00:01:21,982 --> 00:01:25,117 -Did you jiggle the handle? -Can I have some privacy? 39 00:01:25,119 --> 00:01:26,784 -Get dressed. You can go at school. 40 00:01:26,821 --> 00:01:29,388 -I have human rights! This is ridiculous. 41 00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:32,257 Mary: Septic tank might be full. 42 00:01:32,293 --> 00:01:33,859 Do you want me to call my father? 43 00:01:33,861 --> 00:01:36,261 -No, no, no. I get insulted enough by my own father. 44 00:01:36,396 --> 00:01:37,529 -Okay, then I'll call a plumber. 45 00:01:37,598 --> 00:01:39,531 -No, wait, wait, don't do that. 46 00:01:39,666 --> 00:01:42,267 You can call him, but tell him I already jiggled the handle, 47 00:01:42,269 --> 00:01:43,268 So it's not that. 48 00:01:43,270 --> 00:01:44,937 -Okay... 49 00:01:44,939 --> 00:01:47,873 ♪ 50 00:01:47,942 --> 00:01:50,409 ♪ 51 00:01:50,544 --> 00:01:53,145 [breathing nervously] 52 00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:54,613 Adult mark (v.O.): Every bump and jiggle 53 00:01:54,682 --> 00:01:56,515 Threatened to make my legs cry. 54 00:01:56,517 --> 00:01:59,284 -Give it up! You need to read that before we get to school. 55 00:01:59,419 --> 00:02:00,819 -Frig off! You're not my mudder! 56 00:02:00,954 --> 00:02:03,021 -Well, since dad's frigged off and mom's working two jobs, 57 00:02:03,090 --> 00:02:05,190 I am. 58 00:02:05,192 --> 00:02:06,692 -Do you mind? 59 00:02:06,827 --> 00:02:09,962 I'm dealing with a personal issue. 60 00:02:10,097 --> 00:02:13,298 Fox: Come on, open it up. 61 00:02:13,367 --> 00:02:15,767 Now read that for me. 62 00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:17,169 -A moose! Luh! 63 00:02:17,238 --> 00:02:18,370 Fox: Great job. 64 00:02:18,372 --> 00:02:20,839 -Mom's s'posed to sign that, luh. 65 00:02:25,012 --> 00:02:26,044 -Nimrod! 66 00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:28,113 This says that if you mess up one more time 67 00:02:28,248 --> 00:02:29,181 You'll be suspended! 68 00:02:29,316 --> 00:02:31,249 -I know! Wicked, wha? 69 00:02:31,285 --> 00:02:35,186 Me brudder don't need no school and I don't need none, neither. 70 00:02:35,222 --> 00:02:37,388 Adult mark (v.O.): His past was tense, his future imperfect, 71 00:02:37,424 --> 00:02:38,924 And his grammar was terrible. 72 00:02:38,926 --> 00:02:41,193 -He's a loser, ya hear me? 73 00:02:41,195 --> 00:02:42,928 Staying away from him is the only way 74 00:02:42,997 --> 00:02:44,496 To keep us all together. 75 00:02:44,565 --> 00:02:48,233 If you gets kicked out, you'll get another kick from me. 76 00:02:48,235 --> 00:02:51,003 Right in the nuts. 77 00:02:51,138 --> 00:02:53,304 You want dad to take us? 78 00:02:57,745 --> 00:03:00,379 Sign my mudder's name to this. 79 00:03:00,381 --> 00:03:01,613 -Why me? 80 00:03:01,615 --> 00:03:03,114 -The nun knows my handwriting. 81 00:03:03,150 --> 00:03:06,218 She won't suspect yours. 82 00:03:06,353 --> 00:03:07,552 -Fine. 83 00:03:07,588 --> 00:03:10,054 But this makes me an accessory. 84 00:03:14,294 --> 00:03:15,360 Mark: Suz... 85 00:03:15,495 --> 00:03:17,996 -Middle fox: Bump! -[laughter] 86 00:03:21,368 --> 00:03:23,935 -Oh, you frigged it up! 87 00:03:23,971 --> 00:03:25,704 -You're welcome. 88 00:03:28,442 --> 00:03:29,641 Adult mark (v.O.): The bus driver wasn't 89 00:03:29,776 --> 00:03:31,944 The only one likely to have an accident. 90 00:03:32,079 --> 00:03:35,079 ♪ 91 00:03:35,115 --> 00:03:38,583 ♪ 92 00:03:38,586 --> 00:03:40,719 -Give me your hand. -Hey. C'mere. 93 00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:42,587 -Ignore him. -I got a job for ya. 94 00:03:42,590 --> 00:03:44,056 -Just leave him alone. 95 00:03:44,058 --> 00:03:45,089 Get in there. 96 00:03:45,125 --> 00:03:46,825 Go on. 97 00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:49,728 ♪ 98 00:03:49,863 --> 00:03:52,497 ♪ 99 00:03:52,533 --> 00:03:53,531 Mark: Okay... 100 00:03:53,567 --> 00:03:55,533 -Uh, you got a sec? 101 00:03:55,603 --> 00:03:57,568 -Maybe half a sec? 102 00:03:57,605 --> 00:03:59,504 -I don't know what to be at. 103 00:03:59,573 --> 00:04:01,973 Dad's saying that mom's not a good enough mother, and... 104 00:04:02,009 --> 00:04:03,108 -Hm... 105 00:04:03,177 --> 00:04:06,678 -If he gets kicked out, I just... 106 00:04:06,714 --> 00:04:10,882 I just-- I feel like everything is about to fall apart. 107 00:04:10,918 --> 00:04:13,084 Adult mark (v.O.): She was finally opening up to me, 108 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:15,487 But I had no time for heart-to-hearts. 109 00:04:15,489 --> 00:04:17,689 The only organ I could think of was my bladder. 110 00:04:17,725 --> 00:04:20,792 -I want to hear this, I really do. 111 00:04:20,861 --> 00:04:23,829 But I have to pee so bad, I'm practically gargling. 112 00:04:23,964 --> 00:04:25,130 Hold that thought! 113 00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:26,798 -Yeah, sure. 114 00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:29,701 Mark: Oh... Oh... 115 00:04:29,770 --> 00:04:30,969 -Whatever. 116 00:04:36,076 --> 00:04:37,042 -Okay... 117 00:04:39,112 --> 00:04:41,113 -Oh, hey, pal! 118 00:04:41,248 --> 00:04:43,081 How's it going? 119 00:04:43,150 --> 00:04:44,883 Sidle up. Plenty of room! 120 00:04:45,018 --> 00:04:47,185 Adult mark (v.O.): My dream was to be a comedian. 121 00:04:47,221 --> 00:04:50,221 But at the urinal, I suffered from performance anxiety. 122 00:04:50,257 --> 00:04:52,590 -I'm a stall man. 123 00:04:52,660 --> 00:04:54,793 Ritche: Suit yourself. 124 00:04:54,862 --> 00:04:57,529 ♪ 125 00:04:57,598 --> 00:04:59,330 Adult mark (v.O.): The crappy doors of the crapper 126 00:04:59,366 --> 00:05:01,533 Swung as freely as saloon doors in the wild west. 127 00:05:01,668 --> 00:05:03,802 [door creaking] 128 00:05:03,804 --> 00:05:04,936 Adult mark (v.O.): The bowl itself 129 00:05:05,072 --> 00:05:07,472 Was probably the cleanest surface in the stall. 130 00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:09,641 -Eugh... Eugh... 131 00:05:09,643 --> 00:05:10,875 Ritche: How's it going in there? 132 00:05:10,944 --> 00:05:14,012 Mark: Fine, thanks. Eugh... 133 00:05:14,081 --> 00:05:16,281 Silver fox: Put your pickle away and get out! 134 00:05:16,350 --> 00:05:17,749 -I-I have to wash my hands! 135 00:05:17,818 --> 00:05:20,752 Middle fox: He said frig off! 136 00:05:20,887 --> 00:05:22,688 Adult mark (v.O.): Peeing would betray my location. 137 00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:25,157 I was trapped behind enemy lines. 138 00:05:25,292 --> 00:05:26,391 -If a teacher sees ya-- 139 00:05:26,526 --> 00:05:29,026 -Since when are you a wuss, b'y? Come with me! 140 00:05:29,063 --> 00:05:30,428 -I promised her I'd stay. 141 00:05:30,497 --> 00:05:33,598 -Sooky baby promised his little sister? 142 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:35,299 I'm your big brother! 143 00:05:35,336 --> 00:05:37,502 What's wrong? Ya don't like money? 144 00:05:37,538 --> 00:05:39,071 [loud clink] 145 00:05:41,241 --> 00:05:44,842 [dramatic music] 146 00:05:44,878 --> 00:05:48,380 ♪ 147 00:05:48,382 --> 00:05:51,983 Silver fox: [chuckles] you're in the wrong bathroom, critch! 148 00:05:51,985 --> 00:05:55,520 Middle fox: Yeah! You should be in the girls' room! 149 00:05:55,522 --> 00:05:56,854 Adult mark (v.O.): I was so scared 150 00:05:56,890 --> 00:05:58,589 I could have peed my pants. 151 00:05:58,625 --> 00:05:59,925 Middle fox: You gonna pee your panties? 152 00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:01,592 Adult mark (v.O.): Which isn't saying much, 153 00:06:01,628 --> 00:06:02,794 Seeing my current predicament. 154 00:06:07,668 --> 00:06:09,000 -Your brother's in the bathroom. 155 00:06:09,002 --> 00:06:11,269 -So? Just 'cause I gotta watch him 156 00:06:11,405 --> 00:06:13,004 Doesn't mean I have to wipe his arse. 157 00:06:13,140 --> 00:06:15,273 -No, your big brother! 158 00:06:15,409 --> 00:06:17,708 -But... He's not allowed in the school. 159 00:06:19,947 --> 00:06:22,280 ♪ 160 00:06:22,349 --> 00:06:24,349 [banging noises] 161 00:06:24,484 --> 00:06:26,218 Middle fox: We know you're in there! 162 00:06:26,220 --> 00:06:28,019 Silver fox: Come out, critch! 163 00:06:31,758 --> 00:06:33,658 Fox: What the frig? 164 00:06:33,660 --> 00:06:34,625 Mark: Fox?! 165 00:06:34,661 --> 00:06:36,194 This is the boys' room! 166 00:06:36,196 --> 00:06:38,029 Adult mark (v.O.): I would never pee again. 167 00:06:38,165 --> 00:06:39,297 -You get busted for this, 168 00:06:39,433 --> 00:06:40,599 They're gonna kick you out, nimrod. 169 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:41,666 -Wasn't me. 170 00:06:41,802 --> 00:06:44,402 I don't even go here. 171 00:06:44,471 --> 00:06:47,438 -Can I have a little privacy, please? 172 00:06:47,474 --> 00:06:49,841 [school bell rings] 173 00:06:49,843 --> 00:06:51,709 -Aw... 174 00:06:52,713 --> 00:06:54,446 Poppy bell: Ugh! Who the hell used it 175 00:06:54,581 --> 00:06:56,047 When they knew it wouldn't flush? 176 00:06:56,083 --> 00:06:58,784 -Damn kids, I think. Ah, some people. 177 00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:00,385 -Thanks for coming, ed. 178 00:07:00,387 --> 00:07:02,587 I could have done it, but mary was all... 179 00:07:02,722 --> 00:07:04,055 Well, you know women! 180 00:07:04,057 --> 00:07:06,925 -I know I'd rather her at it than the likes 'a you. 181 00:07:06,994 --> 00:07:08,360 [chuckles] 182 00:07:08,362 --> 00:07:09,361 -How's it look, dad? 183 00:07:09,496 --> 00:07:10,795 -Uh, where's your water shut-off? 184 00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:12,530 -Oh, we don't have one. 185 00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:13,932 -I got it. 186 00:07:17,871 --> 00:07:20,338 -I jiggled the tommy-jigger, but the, uh, 187 00:07:20,474 --> 00:07:22,874 Whatchama-callit didn't jangle. 188 00:07:23,009 --> 00:07:23,941 -Plunger? 189 00:07:23,977 --> 00:07:25,210 -No. 190 00:07:25,279 --> 00:07:27,145 -I got the brush here. 191 00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:28,480 -Are you coddin' me? 192 00:07:28,549 --> 00:07:30,215 -Useless. 193 00:07:33,420 --> 00:07:35,786 [toilet burbles] 194 00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:38,089 -Mary? 195 00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:41,560 -It's off. 196 00:07:41,562 --> 00:07:42,827 -Ah, good girl. 197 00:07:42,896 --> 00:07:45,230 Uh, pass me the thumb wrench. 198 00:07:45,232 --> 00:07:46,297 -Oh, yes. 199 00:07:46,333 --> 00:07:49,634 Now, and, uh... What colour would that one be? 200 00:07:49,636 --> 00:07:51,703 -Mary? 201 00:07:51,772 --> 00:07:53,905 -Here you go, dad. -Thanks, ducky. 202 00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:56,240 I'm gonna have to take the bowl off. 203 00:07:56,276 --> 00:07:57,242 Got a bucket? 204 00:07:57,311 --> 00:07:58,710 -Yup. 205 00:08:03,116 --> 00:08:05,450 -I'll, uh-- I'll go give her a hand with that. 206 00:08:05,519 --> 00:08:06,918 -Yeah, yeah, yeah. 207 00:08:09,656 --> 00:08:10,721 -Mike? 208 00:08:10,757 --> 00:08:11,990 -[quietly] he hates me! 209 00:08:12,059 --> 00:08:15,193 -No, he just raised me all on his own, is all. 210 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:17,395 He's just protective of his little girl. 211 00:08:17,431 --> 00:08:18,730 And he never comes over here 212 00:08:18,732 --> 00:08:19,931 Because he thinks you don't like him. 213 00:08:20,066 --> 00:08:22,000 -I don't! He thinks I'm useless! 214 00:08:22,069 --> 00:08:23,267 He's always making fun of me, 215 00:08:23,303 --> 00:08:25,136 And you always end up taking his side. 216 00:08:25,138 --> 00:08:26,237 -Mike! 217 00:08:26,306 --> 00:08:29,173 Just because you can't fix a toilet or drive a car 218 00:08:29,243 --> 00:08:30,808 Or change a tire... 219 00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:32,577 You might not be good enough for him, 220 00:08:32,579 --> 00:08:34,478 But you're perfect for me. 221 00:08:34,615 --> 00:08:37,015 -Not good enough? 222 00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:38,049 -Here. 223 00:08:38,118 --> 00:08:40,285 Why don't you give him the bucket? 224 00:08:40,354 --> 00:08:42,820 Show him how handy you can be. 225 00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:44,923 Now, just remember... 226 00:08:44,992 --> 00:08:48,159 He's just as scared of you as you are of him. 227 00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:54,966 [inspirational music] 228 00:08:54,968 --> 00:08:57,001 -I'm not scared 'a you! 229 00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:58,869 Bucket. 230 00:08:58,906 --> 00:09:01,039 What a man's man. 231 00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:03,541 Mary, help me lift the bowl off. 232 00:09:03,577 --> 00:09:06,243 I wouldn't want you to crack a nail. 233 00:09:06,280 --> 00:09:08,713 -Yeah, mike, you should go soak your hands in palmolive. 234 00:09:08,848 --> 00:09:11,315 [both laughing] 235 00:09:11,351 --> 00:09:15,853 ♪ 236 00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:18,255 Poppy bell: Alright, now, just give me a second. 237 00:09:20,127 --> 00:09:21,859 -May I use the washroom, sister? 238 00:09:21,861 --> 00:09:24,228 -Class just started. 239 00:09:24,298 --> 00:09:29,067 If jesus can go without food for 40 days and 40 nights, 240 00:09:29,202 --> 00:09:31,936 You can hold your pee until recess. 241 00:09:34,608 --> 00:09:36,440 -Don't think about waterfalls. 242 00:09:37,577 --> 00:09:38,944 [announcement over pa] 243 00:09:39,079 --> 00:09:42,347 Sister rose: There has been an act of vandalism 244 00:09:42,482 --> 00:09:44,782 In the grade-nine washroom. 245 00:09:44,851 --> 00:09:47,451 Would all boys who used the second floor washroom 246 00:09:47,487 --> 00:09:52,357 This morning report to the main staircase? 247 00:09:52,359 --> 00:09:54,792 Class: Ooh! 248 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:10,175 [pop snoring] 249 00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:18,917 -It's not right. -What? 250 00:10:19,052 --> 00:10:21,519 Oh. Hello, eddie. 251 00:10:21,588 --> 00:10:23,554 Uh... 252 00:10:23,590 --> 00:10:25,523 Uh, I was just reading. 253 00:10:25,525 --> 00:10:27,591 -Oh yeah? 254 00:10:27,628 --> 00:10:29,127 I said, "it's not right." 255 00:10:29,262 --> 00:10:31,663 A grown man sleeping in with a boy. 256 00:10:31,798 --> 00:10:33,531 He's too old for that now. 257 00:10:33,567 --> 00:10:35,399 -Oh... 258 00:10:35,435 --> 00:10:37,735 I mean, we get along. 259 00:10:37,771 --> 00:10:39,737 He doesn't seem to mind. 260 00:10:39,873 --> 00:10:42,006 -Should be sleeping on his own. 261 00:10:42,009 --> 00:10:45,009 That boy's too soft. 262 00:10:45,012 --> 00:10:48,379 -You don't know him like I do. 263 00:10:48,448 --> 00:10:51,215 -Yes. You're right there. 264 00:10:54,321 --> 00:10:59,157 -You suck up all the crap, did ya? 265 00:10:59,159 --> 00:11:01,960 -Not ashamed of it, either. 266 00:11:01,962 --> 00:11:04,028 You critches. 267 00:11:04,031 --> 00:11:06,263 You know what your problem is? 268 00:11:06,299 --> 00:11:08,867 -No, but I have a feeling I'm about to find out. 269 00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:11,836 -You think that your crap don't stink. 270 00:11:11,872 --> 00:11:16,941 Well, I can tell ya first-hand, eugh, it does. 271 00:11:16,977 --> 00:11:18,976 I'm not afraid to get my hands dirty. 272 00:11:19,046 --> 00:11:22,180 Your son? All he does is yap. 273 00:11:22,249 --> 00:11:24,315 Yap, yap, yap. 274 00:11:24,317 --> 00:11:25,850 That's not work. 275 00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:28,586 -Well, he put a roof over your daughter's head. 276 00:11:28,655 --> 00:11:30,187 You should be grateful. 277 00:11:30,223 --> 00:11:33,057 -Mary could've had her pick. 278 00:11:33,060 --> 00:11:34,626 I don't know what she sees in him. 279 00:11:34,761 --> 00:11:36,627 He doesn't even own this house. 280 00:11:36,663 --> 00:11:38,830 Sure, I built mine. 281 00:11:38,899 --> 00:11:42,200 You ever own a house, pat? 282 00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:43,201 -No. 283 00:11:43,270 --> 00:11:44,335 I never did. 284 00:11:44,371 --> 00:11:45,837 -Sin. 285 00:11:45,972 --> 00:11:48,539 It's a grand thing to own your own house. 286 00:11:48,575 --> 00:11:52,143 Knowing you'll never be a burden to anyone. 287 00:11:52,179 --> 00:11:53,244 -Ah. 288 00:11:54,881 --> 00:11:58,082 Another toilet that won't flush. 289 00:12:01,488 --> 00:12:02,520 -Sister? 290 00:12:02,522 --> 00:12:03,788 -Yes? 291 00:12:03,790 --> 00:12:05,423 -I think I got my period. 292 00:12:05,425 --> 00:12:07,292 -Gross. 293 00:12:07,427 --> 00:12:10,695 -Well, remember. It's not your fault. 294 00:12:10,830 --> 00:12:12,897 It's eve's. 295 00:12:19,706 --> 00:12:22,040 -In all my years... 296 00:12:24,044 --> 00:12:28,513 In all my 40 years as an educator... 297 00:12:28,648 --> 00:12:30,481 Adult mark (v.O.): I really needed her to 298 00:12:30,484 --> 00:12:32,851 Pick up the pace here. I was practically sweating pee! 299 00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:35,787 Sister rose: I've never been so mortified, 300 00:12:35,856 --> 00:12:40,925 So bewildered, so ashamed 301 00:12:40,994 --> 00:12:43,394 Of a group of students. 302 00:12:43,463 --> 00:12:45,196 Mr. Chafe? 303 00:12:45,331 --> 00:12:48,533 -Sometime between 8:45 and 9:10, 304 00:12:48,535 --> 00:12:52,670 A door was vandalized in the grade nine washroom. 305 00:12:52,739 --> 00:12:54,338 Knocked off its hinges. 306 00:12:54,374 --> 00:12:58,276 Sister rose: And mr. Chafe, you oversee the male facilities. 307 00:12:58,411 --> 00:13:00,411 Adult mark (v.O.): My teeth were practically floating. 308 00:13:00,447 --> 00:13:02,614 -What was the condition of the door before 309 00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:05,550 This criminal act, mr. Chafe? 310 00:13:05,685 --> 00:13:06,750 -Perfect, sister. 311 00:13:06,787 --> 00:13:08,085 Like a bank vault. 312 00:13:08,155 --> 00:13:09,454 Adult mark (v.O.): Liar. 313 00:13:09,589 --> 00:13:14,626 -So, the culprit must be a very strong young man, indeed. 314 00:13:14,628 --> 00:13:16,360 Would you agree, mr. Chafe? 315 00:13:16,396 --> 00:13:18,530 Chafe: Oh, most certainly, sister. 316 00:13:18,665 --> 00:13:19,897 -Gentlemen... 317 00:13:19,933 --> 00:13:24,669 You are the only boys who used that washroom this morning. 318 00:13:24,738 --> 00:13:27,105 Someone here did it. 319 00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:30,642 But who could it be? 320 00:13:30,644 --> 00:13:33,978 Who would be strong enough? 321 00:13:34,113 --> 00:13:36,581 Who would be... 322 00:13:36,650 --> 00:13:39,350 Stupid enough? 323 00:13:45,692 --> 00:13:48,326 Adult mark (v.O.): Maybe it was young love. 324 00:13:48,461 --> 00:13:51,396 Maybe it was the pee drowning out my brain. 325 00:13:51,531 --> 00:13:55,199 Or maybe it was my admiration for what fox was trying to do. 326 00:13:55,202 --> 00:13:56,801 -It was me, sister. 327 00:13:56,803 --> 00:13:57,735 Middle fox: What? 328 00:13:57,804 --> 00:13:58,870 Ritche: Dude. 329 00:13:58,872 --> 00:14:00,204 Sister rose: That's not possible! 330 00:14:00,207 --> 00:14:02,473 You're not strong enough. 331 00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:04,008 Asthmatic... 332 00:14:04,010 --> 00:14:05,843 Soft... 333 00:14:05,846 --> 00:14:07,144 -I think it was just puberty. 334 00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,280 You know, don't know my own strength. 335 00:14:09,349 --> 00:14:12,016 -Are you sure you're not being threatened? 336 00:14:13,486 --> 00:14:15,687 -Chalk it up to a growth spurt. [chuckles] 337 00:14:15,822 --> 00:14:17,755 I've been drinking milk. 338 00:14:17,891 --> 00:14:20,558 -This won't buy you friendship. 339 00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:23,294 ♪ 340 00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:27,031 ♪ 341 00:14:27,166 --> 00:14:28,499 -[quietly] thank you. 342 00:14:28,501 --> 00:14:31,870 Adult mark (v.O.): They say true love is sacrifice. 343 00:14:32,005 --> 00:14:34,072 Besides, how bad could it be? 344 00:14:34,074 --> 00:14:35,906 -One month detention. 345 00:14:35,942 --> 00:14:38,476 And you're responsible for the repair. 346 00:14:38,478 --> 00:14:42,680 Do you have anything to say for yourself? 347 00:14:42,716 --> 00:14:44,882 -May I use the washroom? 348 00:14:44,885 --> 00:14:47,151 -No! 349 00:14:53,026 --> 00:14:54,692 -Hey, thanks. 350 00:14:54,694 --> 00:14:55,927 That was deadly. 351 00:14:55,996 --> 00:14:58,396 -Yeah. Anytime. 352 00:14:58,465 --> 00:15:03,401 ♪ 353 00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:05,770 ♪ 354 00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:09,073 ♪ 355 00:15:09,109 --> 00:15:13,744 [water running] 356 00:15:13,780 --> 00:15:15,613 -Well, that's it for me. 357 00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:17,348 All done. 358 00:15:17,350 --> 00:15:19,150 -Oh, thanks, dad. -Nah. 359 00:15:19,219 --> 00:15:21,585 -It was so good to see ya. 360 00:15:22,889 --> 00:15:24,288 -I s'pose I'll hear from ya 361 00:15:24,291 --> 00:15:25,622 The next time you need something. 362 00:15:25,659 --> 00:15:27,792 That's the only way I ever hears from ya. 363 00:15:27,794 --> 00:15:30,094 -Oh, give it up. Our phone works too, ya know. 364 00:15:30,130 --> 00:15:32,229 -Yeah, I s'pose. 365 00:15:35,301 --> 00:15:37,168 -Dad? -Yeah? 366 00:15:37,237 --> 00:15:39,303 -Stay for supper. 367 00:15:39,306 --> 00:15:42,306 The boys didn't see ya at all. 368 00:15:42,342 --> 00:15:43,508 -No. 369 00:15:43,643 --> 00:15:47,412 You got a house full, sure, with pat and all. 370 00:15:47,547 --> 00:15:50,915 -You're their grandfather too. 371 00:15:51,050 --> 00:15:54,618 -Well, what are we makin'? 372 00:15:54,688 --> 00:15:57,121 -Let's see what we got. -[chuckles] alright. 373 00:15:57,256 --> 00:16:00,190 Let's see what we got. 374 00:16:00,226 --> 00:16:01,692 Mary: We could make turkey? 375 00:16:05,064 --> 00:16:06,663 Mike sr: Details are scanty, 376 00:16:06,700 --> 00:16:09,734 But the stolen goods are reported to have a street value 377 00:16:09,736 --> 00:16:11,869 Of over $47. 378 00:16:12,005 --> 00:16:13,705 -We need to talk. 379 00:16:13,840 --> 00:16:16,274 -Mike critch for the vocm news. -[music starts] 380 00:16:16,409 --> 00:16:18,176 Pop, you can't just walk in here! 381 00:16:18,178 --> 00:16:19,277 -Yap, yap, yap. 382 00:16:19,412 --> 00:16:21,646 That's all you ever do is yap. 383 00:16:21,648 --> 00:16:25,183 You've got to stand up to her father. 384 00:16:25,185 --> 00:16:26,951 -Oh, come on. He'll be gone in a minute. 385 00:16:26,953 --> 00:16:28,285 -Oh, really? 386 00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:31,222 She's just invited him to supper. 387 00:16:31,291 --> 00:16:34,158 And once a sewer rat gets into the house, 388 00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:37,495 They're never gonna leave. 389 00:16:37,564 --> 00:16:39,497 -You came here just to tell me that? 390 00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:41,899 -No! 391 00:16:41,901 --> 00:16:44,102 I came to use the crapper! 392 00:16:44,237 --> 00:16:47,538 I wouldn't give him the pleasure of using ours! 393 00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:54,645 -Is the toilet fixed?! -Mary: Yes! 394 00:16:54,714 --> 00:16:56,714 -The door was off and I nearly missed the bus 395 00:16:56,716 --> 00:16:58,783 'cause I had detention and I gotta go! 396 00:16:58,852 --> 00:17:02,820 [dramatic music] 397 00:17:02,822 --> 00:17:05,189 ♪ 398 00:17:05,258 --> 00:17:08,392 [tinkling sound] 399 00:17:08,428 --> 00:17:12,396 [triumphant music] 400 00:17:12,465 --> 00:17:14,732 ♪ 401 00:17:14,801 --> 00:17:17,802 ♪ 402 00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:29,080 Pop: Well, this looks good. 403 00:17:29,082 --> 00:17:30,080 Mary: There we go. 404 00:17:30,116 --> 00:17:31,816 -You wash your hands? 405 00:17:33,520 --> 00:17:37,889 -Well, this looks good after a long day working... 406 00:17:38,024 --> 00:17:39,256 Very hard. 407 00:17:39,292 --> 00:17:42,793 -Very hard. Very hard working. 408 00:17:42,796 --> 00:17:45,829 -Oh, I'm sorry, mike. Is this your seat? 409 00:17:45,865 --> 00:17:47,698 -No! 410 00:17:47,734 --> 00:17:49,167 Mike, you just... 411 00:17:53,873 --> 00:17:56,107 -We need to talk about your detention. 412 00:17:56,242 --> 00:17:58,275 Poppy bell: I didn't know ya had it in ya. 413 00:17:58,311 --> 00:17:59,810 Beatin' the crap out of a toilet! 414 00:17:59,879 --> 00:18:00,912 [laughter] 415 00:18:01,047 --> 00:18:02,546 -I don't find it very funny. 416 00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:05,516 Poppy bell: Well, I think it's friggin' hilarious. 417 00:18:05,552 --> 00:18:08,052 -Mark, you like jokes, right? -Yeah. 418 00:18:08,187 --> 00:18:10,855 -What does a plumber play at the casino? 419 00:18:10,857 --> 00:18:12,123 -What? 420 00:18:12,258 --> 00:18:14,525 -Craps! 421 00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:17,327 Mike jr: Hey, I might use that on air, poppy! 422 00:18:17,363 --> 00:18:20,063 -Vandalism is a serious matter. 423 00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:23,467 -Boys will be boys. Now, eat up! 424 00:18:23,470 --> 00:18:25,402 'cause every time you put food in your mouth, 425 00:18:25,404 --> 00:18:27,304 You put food on my table. 426 00:18:27,373 --> 00:18:29,006 -Dad! -Ugh! 427 00:18:29,142 --> 00:18:31,876 Mike jr: Gross. That is gross! 428 00:18:31,945 --> 00:18:36,046 -You know, I think that's enough toilet talk at the table. 429 00:18:36,116 --> 00:18:37,514 -Mike! 430 00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:45,223 -You think you're better than me, mike? 431 00:18:45,358 --> 00:18:47,291 -You're the one always taking the piss outta me. 432 00:18:47,293 --> 00:18:49,894 -[laughs] well, that's kind of his job! 433 00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:54,899 Eh... 434 00:18:54,968 --> 00:18:56,167 Pop: First, supper... 435 00:18:56,169 --> 00:18:58,302 Then what? 436 00:18:58,437 --> 00:19:00,671 Oh, well, you're not having my bed! 437 00:19:00,806 --> 00:19:03,407 They'll have to drag me out of that room in a box! 438 00:19:03,476 --> 00:19:04,775 -Sweet dreams. 439 00:19:04,777 --> 00:19:08,513 -Will you all just friggin' get along, please! 440 00:19:08,648 --> 00:19:10,848 Dad, show some manners. 441 00:19:10,983 --> 00:19:12,216 Pop: He's very immature. 442 00:19:12,218 --> 00:19:14,886 -And you! Give him a break. 443 00:19:15,021 --> 00:19:17,321 He is just jealous that you spend so much time 444 00:19:17,323 --> 00:19:18,422 With the boys. 445 00:19:18,424 --> 00:19:19,657 -Now, mary, I never... 446 00:19:19,659 --> 00:19:22,393 -And I knew you were useless when I married ya. 447 00:19:22,462 --> 00:19:24,662 I don't like my men handy. 448 00:19:24,797 --> 00:19:28,532 And I have never been ashamed of you a day in my life. 449 00:19:28,535 --> 00:19:31,235 You are welcome here any time, in any room, 450 00:19:31,271 --> 00:19:33,371 Not just the bathroom. 451 00:19:37,377 --> 00:19:38,842 No more favours, hmm? 452 00:19:41,047 --> 00:19:42,212 -Fine. 453 00:19:42,248 --> 00:19:43,513 Yeah. 454 00:19:44,484 --> 00:19:46,951 So, uh, mike, 455 00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:49,820 Looks like you owe me 150 bucks for that toilet. 456 00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:56,126 [laughter] 457 00:19:56,196 --> 00:19:59,263 Mike sr: He got me there. 458 00:19:59,265 --> 00:20:00,664 Put it on our tab. 459 00:20:00,666 --> 00:20:03,034 [all chuckling] 460 00:20:03,169 --> 00:20:05,035 ♪ 461 00:20:05,071 --> 00:20:07,972 -Okay, so just like how we did this one, you have to... 462 00:20:08,041 --> 00:20:10,173 Adult mark (v.O.): Sometimes it's easier to pretend 463 00:20:10,210 --> 00:20:12,109 To be someone we're not. 464 00:20:12,111 --> 00:20:15,513 -Okay, no, you have to do, like, that thing right there, okay? 465 00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:16,847 Do you remember you did that before? 466 00:20:16,982 --> 00:20:18,048 Do you remember? 467 00:20:18,084 --> 00:20:19,984 Adult mark (v.O.): We put on a tough exterior... 468 00:20:19,986 --> 00:20:22,987 To keep the world from seeing how soft and squishy 469 00:20:23,056 --> 00:20:24,121 We are inside. 470 00:20:24,157 --> 00:20:25,189 -Is this all of us? 471 00:20:25,324 --> 00:20:26,390 Middle fox: That's cute. 472 00:20:26,392 --> 00:20:27,658 -Is that you? 473 00:20:27,727 --> 00:20:30,061 Oh, buddy. 474 00:20:30,063 --> 00:20:32,463 -What's goin' on over here, hey? 475 00:20:32,598 --> 00:20:34,197 Adult mark (v.O.): We all have baggage, 476 00:20:34,234 --> 00:20:37,401 But the trick is to find people who will help you unpack. 477 00:20:37,536 --> 00:20:40,004 Suzanne: Did you make that? Is that you? 478 00:20:40,073 --> 00:20:41,472 Oh my goodness! 479 00:20:41,607 --> 00:20:42,606 Is that of us? 480 00:20:42,675 --> 00:20:44,208 -Okay, let's finish this. -Okay. 481 00:20:44,343 --> 00:20:46,343 -So, let's just skip that. 482 00:20:46,479 --> 00:20:48,546 Let's just do this one, it's fine. [laughs] 483 00:20:48,681 --> 00:20:51,349 ♪ 484 00:20:51,351 --> 00:20:55,086 ♪ 485 00:20:55,221 --> 00:20:57,655 -Ah. Yeah. 486 00:20:57,790 --> 00:20:59,724 Adult mark (v.O.): The key is to find people 487 00:20:59,859 --> 00:21:02,026 Who love you for who you really are. 488 00:21:02,095 --> 00:21:05,796 ♪ 489 00:21:05,832 --> 00:21:08,366 Poppy bell: Looks like you're an old hand at it. 490 00:21:08,501 --> 00:21:09,834 [chuckles] that's it. 491 00:21:09,969 --> 00:21:12,202 Adult mark (v.O.): And you might even surprise yourself. 492 00:21:12,272 --> 00:21:13,470 Mark: I think so. 493 00:21:13,472 --> 00:21:15,773 -Alright, let's check it out. -Okay. 494 00:21:15,842 --> 00:21:17,908 Adult mark (v.O.): Doing something for someone else 495 00:21:17,944 --> 00:21:20,444 Can teach you a lot about yourself. 496 00:21:23,049 --> 00:21:27,184 ♪ 497 00:21:27,220 --> 00:21:30,855 ♪ 498 00:21:30,990 --> 00:21:34,592 ♪ 499 00:21:34,727 --> 00:21:37,328 ♪ 500 00:21:37,463 --> 00:21:40,263 ♪ 501 00:21:40,300 --> 00:21:44,869 ♪ 502 00:21:44,871 --> 00:21:47,971 ♪